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of-a-chaotic-mind · 4 months ago

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I Can't Say Part 2

Summary: An Earthquake turns everyone's world upside down and nearly takes part of Eddie's away from him.

TW/CW: Eddie Diaz x Reader, Hurt, Earthquake, Injured Reader, Blood/Blood-loss

Requested?: No

Word Count: 4,136

A/N: Our grand total of words for this trilogy is 11,325... I'm ngl was kinda stuck on how I'd get from break up to make up but then I was rewatching season 2 the other night and well... Earthquake it is. Anyways, hope you enjoy the read! Love to all! Requests are Open!

[ A/N: him so purtty... ]

Part 1

--- Your POV ---

Groaning, I silence my alarm and drag myself to my bedroom to change clothes. I really wish I had changed out of my work clothes last night because it is so uncomfortable to sleep in jeans. I opt for a more comfortable outfit for today since I'm just taking Talia to therapy. My jeans are replaced by sweats, my LAFD t-shirt by an oversized hoodie, and I yank on my high tops to finish it off.

As I make my way to the kitchen for coffee, with a pit stop in the bathroom to brush my teeth, I throw my hair up into a messy bun and check my phone that had miraculously stayed in my back pocket all night. The smell of coffee fills the air as I swipe through notifications which include a few random info dump texts from Buck that I hadn't checked yesterday, a missed call from an unknown number here and there, and a few texts from Tommy checking in on me.

After closing out all the notifications and apps, I find myself staring at my home screen and fidgeting with my bracelet. Glaring back at me is a photo that Buck took in which Chris is sandwiched between me and Eddie as we both hug him. All of us are smiling brightly and my heart hurts at the reminder of my boys. My thoughts are racing when my alarm rings again. I quickly silence it and tuck my phone away before pouring a cup of coffee. As I head out the door, I grab my keys and wallet off the counter.

A good bit later, I'm arriving at Talia's house. I had finally convinced her to let me pick her up if she wants me to drive her to therapy. I shoot her a text to let her know I'm here, forcing myself to ignore my home screen. It only takes a few minutes before she's rushing out of her house and getting in the passenger seat, "Sorry, I woke up a bit late."

I smile, "All good, you should probably brush your hair though," I respond, motioning to the bird's nest atop her head.

As I pull away from the curb, she flips down the visor and giggles at herself in the mirror, "I slept hard last night."

"I can see that," I state, unable to withhold a laugh. Talia has made so much progress in the past week. This is only her second appointment but I can tell a huge difference; she's actually smiling again. She had taken some time off work because she was scared it would either push her over the edge or she wouldn’t be as focused as she needed to be on the job but yesterday, she said she thinks she’ll be ready to get back out there soon.

She grabs my phone from the cupholder, "What kind of music are we feeling today?"

I shrug, "Whatever boats your float."

She erupts into a fit of laughter, "God, I will never stop thanking Tommy for blessing us with that phrase."

I grin as I remember the time a very exhausted, end of shift Tommy responded to the question, "Where do you guys wanna eat?" with, "Whatever boats your float." I'll never forget the look of pure astonishment on his face when he immediately realized what he said and mumbled to himself, "Boats your float? What the fuck?" Talia and I teased him about it for weeks after but it got stuck in my vocabulary and became a regular response for me, causing Talia to giggle and Tommy to roll his eyes every time I say it.

Talia cranks the volume up as she decides on a hip-hop playlist and starts singing along horribly on purpose. This goes on for a little bit, with me giggling at her the whole time, before she finally turns it down, "Alright, what's up with you?"

I tilt my head at her, "What do you mean?"

"I mean not too long ago it was always Eddie this or Christopher that," she pauses, "You haven't mentioned them in like forever and I kind of miss seeing the smile on your face when you'd talk about them." I shrug and train my eyes on the road ahead. She doesn't give up, "Come on, (Y/N). You've let me trauma dump on you for weeks now. If you need to talk, I'll listen."

I take a deep breath, "We broke up."

"What?!" her volume and pitch nearly bursts my eardrums.

I dramatically cover and rub my right ear, "We just decided that it wasn't gonna work out." I hate lying to her but if she knew the real reason she'd blame herself and I don't want to upset her.

"So, it was mutual?" her tone says she doesn't think so. I can't even bring myself to nod. She reaches over and tugs lightly on my bracelet, "I could see keeping the bracelet if it was a mutual break up. That kid means the world to you but-" She picks up my phone and shows me the home screen, "Mutual break ups don't keep photos of their ex as their home screen. People who get dumped do." It's quiet for a couple seconds, "Besides, last time I heard about Eddie, you were asking me if I'd be your Maid of Honor when you guys got married one day. Not if! When."

I internally cringe as the words spill out of my mouth, "Okay, he decided it wasn't gonna work out."

I see the look on her face out of the corner of my eye and she still doesn't buy it, "You mean the man who would fight the entire world for you? The man who would kiss the ground you walk on and bow at your feet? The man who absolutely adores the shit out of you and can never stop staring at you like he can't believe you're real?" I clench my jaw but her phone rings, saving me from having to come up with a response.

A short time later, I am parking on the curb outside her therapist office. She hangs up the phone and grabs my shoulder, "First of all, we're not done talking about it. Second, you should come sit in the waiting room instead of wasting your gas." Praying she won't try to continue the conversation right now, I turn the car off and get out, following her inside.

We ride up to the second floor in the elevator, check her in at the front desk, and take seats in the waiting room before she speaks again, "So, how's Tommy doing? I heard he's got himself a new boyfriend."

I smile and nod, laying my head on the back of my chair, "Yeah, Buck. I work with him at the 118. They're very happy together."

"Oh, that's great! What's Buck like?" she asks. I'm certain she's trying to fill the silence without talking about Eddie.

"If I had to sum him up in one sentence I'd say, there's a reason the team and I call him a golden retriever," I answer and look over at her with a grin.

She laughs, "Oh my god, tell me more."

"Well, he's got a heart of gold and loves his job. He's got tons of energy. He's always got something interesting to talk about because he's constantly researching random shit. One time, he gave me an in-depth explanation of how microwaves work," I pause, "Tommy is absolutely wrapped around his finger. I don't think I've ever seen him smile more than when Buck is info dumping on him."

I sit up, holding my hand up to quiet Talia as she's in the middle of gushing about how adorable that is and how she must meet Buck asap. I stare at the floor beneath us as its small vibrations turn into violent shaking, "Quake!" Everyone in the waiting room ducks for cover. Talia and I slide under a coffee table just as rubble starts falling around us. Quickly covering our heads with our arms, we brace for impact.

When the quake subsides and the dust settles, Talia and I make eye contact as we hear other people panicking. We shove the slab of concrete off the edge of the table and make to get up but instead have to army crawl under another slab of concrete. Keeping my head low, "I sure as hell don't miss this," I grumble, thinking back to my days of army crawling through muddy obstacle courses and sandy war zones.

Behind me, Talia chuckles, "What? Earthquakes or army crawling?"

I pause and look back at her, realizing it has been a while since our last quake, "both," before proceeding cautiously. Our short tunnel opens up into a pocket that is a good bit taller and has more space to maneuver. "Everybody just stay calm. If you're panicking, we can't properly assist you," I announce to those who were blessed by the pocket.

"Please! Please, you have to help her," a young woman cries by the furthest edge from us. She is hunched over another woman whose legs are pinned by a chunk of debris.

"Talia, check everyone else over and get a head count while I try to figure out the safest way to get her out," I instruct.

Behind me, Talia shuffles toward the others, "On it," as I head for the debris.

"Stay with me, Penny," the younger woman begs as Penny groans in pain.

I finally reach them, "Penny, my name is (Y/N). I need you to tell me where it hurts."

"Everywhere," Penny mumbles and I mentally slap myself.

"Okay, yeah. Stupid question, I'm sorry. Can you wiggle your toes?" I respond.

I notice the younger woman's name tag that reads Chelsea as Penny answers, "Yeah I think so."

"Alright, that's a good sign. Chelsea, I need you to see if you can find a piece of wood or something that is big enough for her to lay on," Chelsea nods and begrudgingly leaves to scavenge.

I drop to my stomach and scoot closer to Penny, "We're gonna get you outta here, I'm just a little more limited on resources than usual." I take her hand in mine and drop my forehead to the floor with a thump. My head is pounding; I think I hit it on the underside of the coffee table earlier. I'm having a hard time thinking straight.

I remember Bobby's advice for times like this, "Don't worry about the things that you can't do anything about. Focus on one task at a time." Alright, first task, get Penny free and on a makeshift back board.

I check her pulse, it's weak but steady, "Penny, I need you to focus on your breathing, okay?" She nods, taking deep breaths, as I look up at the debris that is pinning her. It looks like a thick and heavy wall but doesn't appear to be supporting anything. I crawl to where her legs disappear out of sight and stick my hand under as far as I can reach, feeling for any bleeding and thankfully finding none. I crane my neck to look at the others, a few are assisting where they can as Talia checks everyone over. "I need as many hands as I can get over here!" I yell across what remains of the waiting room.

Talia stops what she's doing and points to few men who look to be in pretty good shape considering the circumstances. She directs them to me before squeezing a little girl's hand tightly and joining me herself. As they approach, Chelsea comes hobbling around a corner with a piece of wood.

When everyone is there and ready for instructions, I start dishing them out, "You guys," I point to the men, "spread out around this wall and get ready to lift." I roll over on my back and scoot until my shoulders are even with the edge of the collapsed wall, "Talia, Chelsea, as soon as this wall is up enough, pull her out as gently as you can and get her on the wood." Once everyone is in position, "On the count of three. 1... 2... 3..." I push as hard as I can against the underside of the wall. The men help lift from their positions and soon they've pulled Penny out.

"You get out from under there, we got this," one of the men insists.

I nod and roll back over on my stomach to shove myself up to my feet and away from the wall, "Let it down easy." They do and now I'm left trying to figure out my next task. I scan the pocket looking for any possible exits. A pile of rubble blocks the door to what I hope is still a somewhat functioning stairwell. It will take some time to clear the way enough to get the door open but it's our only shot. I notice the massive receptionist desk is still somehow standing making a decent place for everyone to take cover for the inevitable aftershocks.

"Talia, help everyone get under the reception desk," I look at the men who are patiently waiting for further instruction, "You guys are gonna help me get that door open," I punctuate my sentence with a point at the door. They nod and immediately head that way, as do I. Behind me I hear Talia start instructing the others. Once everyone is under the desk, Talia joins us in the small bit of headway we're making.

--- Third Person POV ---

The 118 is heading toward a downtown building collapse. Despite knowing it's futile, they've all tried contacting various loved ones. Buck sighs in relief as he hears Tommy's voice on the radio, "This is 127 Pilot Kinard. 118 please check in."

Immediately, Buck grabs his radio, "Buckley checking in. Nash, Diaz, Wilson, Han, and Panikkar all accounted for."

It's quiet for a split second before Tommy asks, "(Y/L/N)?" Buck hesitates, looking over at Eddie who has been staring out the window ever since he gave up on trying to reach Chris and (Y/N).

Voice shaky, Buck answers, "No contact. She's off duty."

Tommy's voice sounds strained, "Copy. Y'all stay safe."

Buck responds, trying to sound reassuring, "We will."

As they near the building, Eddie nearly slams his head against the window as he looks back behind them. "Woah, what?" Hen asks across from him, startled by his sudden movement.

Eddie whips his head around to look at his team just as the engine parks next to another one from the 133, "That was (Y/N)'s car!" He flings his headset off and scrambles out of the vehicle as everyone else piles out behind him.

Buck catches up to him and grabs his shoulder when he stops in front of a crushed car, "A-are you sure? She's doesn't exactly have a unique car..." Eddie only points at the shattered windshield. As he spins and takes off toward Bobby, Buck looks to where he pointed to find the rubber duck wearing firefighter gear that he and Tommy had helped Chris buy for (Y/N) on her last birthday. Chris had insisted the duck needed a cowboy hat so they also bought a small Toy Story Woody action figure. Woody himself was sitting at home on one of Buck's bookshelves but his hat now laid beside the little duck in the pancake that was formerly a car.

--- Your POV ---

I wipe the sweat and dust off my face as I hoist another chunk of debris to the new pile we've made. We've made a decent size dent in the blockage but it's still not enough to get through. As the ground begins to tremble again, Talia yells, "Aftershock!"

I turn and attempt to make it to the desk with everyone else but a bout of dizziness takes me down. I feel a blinding pain as something punctures my lower back close to my left hip. I look back to see a piece of rebar sticking out. When everything stops shaking, Talia rushes over to me. I try to get up but the rebar has me staked to the floor. She presses her hands against my blood-soaked hoodie, "(Y/N) you better stay with me!" I try hard to focus on my breathing as she yells at the men to keep working on the blockage and calls Chelsea over to her, "I need you to keep pressure around this, okay?"

Talia drops to her stomach, face to face with me, "How bad is it? Be honest."

I wiggle my toes and reach around to feel exactly where the puncture is, "Shouldn't be too bad. Main concern is the bleeding. Thank god for love handles because I think that's all it hit."

She nods, "Alright, hang in there."

Talia returns back to Chelsea who whispers, "She's losing a lot of blood." I hear fabric tear and feel my hoodie lift up. I'm sure Talia is trying to stem the blood flow as much as possible by sandwiching fabric between my hoodie and skin. I lay my clammy cheek against the cool floor and look out at the wreckage. It's starting to get hard to breathe and my vision is already blurry.

--- Third Person POV ---

Just as Talia finishes packing fabric around the rebar in her friend's abdomen, another aftershock hits. The others rush to the desk and Talia tries to move to cover (Y/N)'s body as much as possible but one of the men pulls her away, "You can't save her if you take a chunk of concrete to the dome."

Talia screams, "(Y/N) don't you dare leave me! Stay awake, okay?!"

As soon as the shaking dies down enough, Talia rushes back to (Y/N), who is now losing even more blood, and adjusts the fabric to accommodate what is now a bigger hole. "(Y/N), you still with me?!" she screams, panic is evident in her tone. She looks over to see that her friend is unconscious, blood trickling down her forehead.

Chelsea joins her, tearing off a piece of her shirt and pressing it to the gash near (Y/N)'s hairline, "She's still breathing but barely."

Talia nods, finishing with the pile of fabric, "Swap with me." The two swap places before Talia shakes (Y/N) gently. She softly smacks her cheeks, "(Y/N) you gotta wake up! Please..." Tears flow freely down her own cheeks now as she looks up at the ceiling, "God you wouldn't be in this mess if it weren't for me..."

As she continues her attempts to wake (Y/N), one of the men shushes everyone, "I think I hear something," he announces, pressing his ear to the little bit of the door they had uncovered. "It's voices!" he cheers, "Help is here!" The room erupts into excitement as the man bangs on the door, "In here! Hey! We're in here!"

On the other side of the door, the 118 team hears the banging and rushes up the stairs as carefully as they can. Bobby yells, "We hear you! This is Captain Nash with LAFD. How many of you are there?"

From (Y/N)'s side, Talia whips her head up and yells back, "10! Firefighter down! One of yours!"

Panic blankets the team and Bobby has to grab a hold of Eddie to keep him from busting the door down, "We don't know what's on the other side of that door," Buck places a hand on Eddie's shoulder so Bobby can turn back to the door and find out what they're dealing with.

The man answers Bobby, "A pile of rubble! We've been trying to clear it because (Y/N) said this stairwell is our best bet on getting out."

Eddie's heart leaps into his throat at the confirmation that it's her. Buck's grip tightens, warning him to calm down. Bobby instructs, "Okay, I need everyone to get away from the door. We're gonna have to saw our way in."

The man looks down at (Y/N) and Talia, "We can't move (Y/N), she's staked to the floor by rebar. I think if I try to pull Talia away from her again, she might murder me." Buck's ears perk up at the mention of Talia. Maybe Tommy was onto something there. He shoves those thoughts aside as Bobby asks for the saw in his hands.

"Alright, the rest of you back away. Talia, do your best to shield her," Bobby responds, "Let us know when we're clear."

In the room, everyone puts plenty of distance between them and the door as Talia covers (Y/N)'s body the best she can, "Clear!"

Buck drags Eddie away as he and the team back up to give space. Bobby cuts a large enough hole in the door before handing the saw to Chimney, "Buck, help me with this." Together Bobby and Buck remove the metal chunk and as soon as he has a clear shot, Eddie rushes through the hole. Hen is right on his heels, med bag in hand, as Talia moves away from (Y/N) to let them work.

Bobby, Buck, Chimney, and Ravi set to work helping the others out of the building as Hen grabs Eddie's frantic hands, "You need to calm down, Eddie."

He takes a deep breath before placing two fingers on (Y/N)'s wrist, "Pulse is steady but dangerously weak." The two medics set to work doing their best to stabilize her. When Buck and Bobby join them, she has an oxygen mask on, IV line in, a pulse/ox monitor on her finger, and Hen is keeping pressure around the wound.

"What do we got?" Bobby asks firmly as he crouches beside Eddie, placing his hand on the distraught man's shoulder. Eddie can only stare down at her, repeatedly brushing her hair out of her face as he silently begs her to wake up.

Hen answers, "Vitals are steady but in the danger zone. She's lost a lot of blood. Rebar isn't too close to any vital organs but it went all the way through and into the floor."

Bobby nods, "We transport her with the rebar. Eddie, lift her up as gently as you can. Buck, hand me the bolt cutters and lift on the other side. Hen, keep pressure on that wound and an eye on her vitals." Everyone nods as Chimney and Ravi return from helping the last of the others out with a back board. On the count of three Eddie and Buck lift (Y/N) up enough that Bobby can cut the rebar underneath her. Once they've rolled her onto back, Hen quickly sets to work dressing the untouched side. In minutes, they're lifting her onto the back board and headed out of the building.

As they approach the scene commander, Bobby states, "We need an ambulance now."

The commander nods recognizing (Y/N), "We've got more on the way take the 133's." Bobby leads the way toward the 133 ambulance. Behind them, the commander yells, “I still need hands on deck, Nash.”

As Hen and Chimney load (Y/N) into the back, Bobby looks at them all, “I know we’re all worried about her. One driver and Eddie can go. Everyone else needs to stay here.” Talia takes a few steps back from the group as Eddie climbs into the back and Hen heads to the front. She looks up at the collapsing building and around at the firefighters and paramedics rushing around near them.

She looks back toward the ambulance as Bobby calls her name and holds his hand out to help her into the back. She’s still nervous about getting back out there right now but she knows she can be of more help here than at the hospital blaming herself for (Y/N)’s injury. She steps up beside him, ignoring his hand, “Got an extra turn out?”

Before Bobby can ask if she’s sure, Tommy runs up to them already wearing turn out gear and carrying an extra, “Heard you guys are down by two.” He sees (Y/N) in the back of the ambulance and he feels a touch of anger in the worry that settles in his chest as Eddie frets over her vitals. Bobby shuts the doors of the ambulance and gives it a few knocks before it pulls away.

He turns to Tommy, “Shouldn’t you be in a helicopter?”

“Commander radioed for extra hands and I’ve been grounded. Our station got hit pretty hard and took my ride down with it,” Tommy answers. He turns to Talia, offering her the extra gear that she can see her last name written on, “I had a hunch you’d be here so I grabbed your old gear before I left.” She takes it and quickly puts it on, looking to Bobby for orders.

Part 3

More 911

Main Masterlist

#911 #911 show #911 imagine #911 imagines #eddie diaz #eddie diaz x reader #eddie diaz imagine #eddie diaz imagines #y/n #eddie diaz x y/n #hurt #injury #injured reader #earthquake #blood #blood loss

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xtarmanderx · 24 days ago

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I don’t ever post things like this here because this is primarily my writing side blog, but it feels too important not to say something.

I started writing 9-1-1 fics for the Buddie fandom and for a friend who was near and dear to me. I quickly left the fandom because of the mods for an event that I was participating in and how awful they were to one of my best friends that joined the event with me. That completely killed my desire to interact with the Buddie fandom at all and I don’t know if I will ever finish posting the fic that I poured my heart into for said event. Because that fic is fully done, but those encounters with those fans made me never want to write Buddie again.

And then Tommy Kinard came along.

And holy fuck, I fell in love with him so fast. I immediately rewatched the show after he reappeared in season 7 because I was so fascinated with his character. And then I fell in love with Lou Ferrigno Jr. and began watching S.W.A.T. just to get glimpses of him and I grew to love that show and its characters, too. And I read his interviews and saw how happy he was to be back on the show and it made me happy, too.

Then I saw all the hate and negativity.

It filled me with so much anger and I blocked so many people across so many different forms of social media so I no longer had to see it. All I wanted was to surround myself with positivity.

Because I’ve been that bitch.

There are people no longer in certain fandoms because of me and I’ll never be able to apologize enough for the ways that I hurt them. Sorry will never be enough to mend those bridges that I poured kerosene on.

It’s why I’ve stayed in my corner and all of my fic comments have been generic, which isn’t who I used to be. I used to engage and leave long comments, but honestly I’ve been terrified to try and join any new community. Because I am fucking terrified of reverting back to the person I never want to be again.

My best friend started watching the show again after I went to his house for dinner and had him watch the BuckTommy kiss episode with me. The last five minutes of that episode, I told him to put his phone down and pay full attention and he was completely engaged and was so happy to see another queer couple onscreen. It gave us something else to bond over every week as we would watch and text about what was happening.

Tonight’s text:

This coming from a gay man who does not engage in fandom spaces at all and who felt blindsided, too. Like so many of us did.

I immediately started writing a fix it fic because that’s who I am. I want to write the endings I want to see. And then I stopped writing and sent Lou a message directly because I needed to get something off my chest.

I was raised in a broken home. Raised by racists who belittled me endlessly and have told me within the last couple of years that I am their least favorite child. I am the youngest of 6. That shit was heartbreaking. It’s a wound that will never heal. But why am I bringing it up? Why does that matter?

Because I saw myself in Tommy. I saw a character who represented the worst parts of my youth, who spouted hateful things my parents taught me to say and then spent years having to unlearn those things. Lou talked about his own ideas about Tommy’s past and it struck so close to home for me. Because Tommy showed he was capable of change. And I did, too. It took therapy and years of reflection and being hyperaware now of the shit I say and having to constantly stay on top of my own thoughts and correct them.

I have been dating a woman of color for the last 9.5 years and she’s the love of my life. She has been there through every stumble and stayed even when my passive aggressive inclinations got the better of me. And I saw so much of myself reflected in Tommy Kinard’s character and Lou’s portrayal of him and saw our relationship in Buck and Tommy, too.

Tonight hit me so much harder than expected. And this probably seems like a jumbled mess of thoughts, which it is, but I needed to get some things off my chest and out into the world.

This is not the week that so many of us were expecting. This hurt. We’re allowed to be upset and need time to process. I sure as hell do.

But I do want to say a heartfelt thank you to anyone who has brought joy and friendship to this fandom. The fics that have been written are amazing and the art has been fantastic. I’ve seen some people make lifelong friends in the past few months thanks to this. It sure as hell strengthened some of mine.

So, if you need a friend right now, know that I’m here. I’ve been subdued for a while, but I refuse to lose out on more joy in my life. Not when we all desperately need it. So I’m here for you.

And please remember to be kind. Don’t let anyone take that superpower away from you.

#911 spoilers #9 1 1 spoilers #BuckTommy #Tevan #my introspection #evan buckley #tommy kinard

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theragethatisdesire · 1 year ago

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much ado about nothing chapter 6 - plug!eren x reader - 18+!!!

DISCLAIMER: this post contains MATURE CONTENT that is intended only for those over 18. minors and ageless blogs, please do not read below the cut.

ummmmm HIII so sorry i know i still owe you guys a million drabbles and i haven't been posting as much but this chapter is just chock-full of drama and i'm so excited to share it bc hehehe it's a rollercoaster. also we should def stop listening to sasha. sneaky posting; have fun babies!!!! i cannot WAIT to hear your thoughts

specific cws: alcohol use, violence (like fist-fighting level not insane), mentions of drugs, swearing, incredibly awkward tension lol

“The course of true love never did run smooth.” A Midsummer Night’s Dream by William Shakespeare (Act I, Scene 1)

You’ve done a lot of partying in your days, but you never thought a hangover could float over your shoulders for damn near two weeks. Then again, maybe that rancid taste in your mouth is regret instead of the practical gallons of liquor you’d guzzled that night.

Historia tells you to delete the evidence, have a glass of wine with your friends, focus on your studies, put meaning back into the happy distractions that make up life. Sasha tells you to suck it up, download Tinder, do something other than wallow in your bed with nothing on but the fairy lights along your ceiling. Ymir tells you men aren’t worth embarrassing yourself for, maybe start swinging the other way, that she knows a few very pretty single ladies.

You meet all of their advice with a slow nod, sometimes a chuckle, put your head down, and go about your business, letting the shame follow you around like a little rain cloud from building to building around campus. Even your students have noticed something’s making you tick; Falco and Gabi left a package of Crumbl cookies in your office the other day, and for the first time, Zofia has begun to raise her hand in class. It’s heartwarming, really, but it doesn’t solve your problem.

Problems would be the better term for it. To start, there was your royal fuck-up with Eren. You had over-indulged and gotten a little too flirty to be “friends”, sure, it happens, but something had snapped in you when you saw Eren with that leggy blonde hanging all over him at the club.

Breeze. Even wearing naught but a skirt and some thin tights with the early winter wind whipping around your legs, just the thought of her name makes your blood boil. She was perfect, all bouncy and easygoing and cool, hippie clothes. To be fair, she was the one with the true claim on Eren; you had dug your own grave, far too confident in your ability to be just friends with someone so…so Eren.

Your friendship had been growing closer and closer by the passing day before that night, texting at nearly every minute of the day and spending time together wherever you could fit it in your full schedule. You had made plans to bake Christmas cookies together, even despite Eren’s protests that Christmas was a “capitalistic hellhole of a holiday season”, had acted out your favorite Shakespeare scenes in your pajamas, much to Eren’s amusement, and had made a habit of staying up late into the night watching and rewatching your favorite animes, heatedly debating characters. It had been butterfly-inducing, dizzying, perfect. Until you had indulged in one too many shots and humiliated yourself, that is.

Seeing Breeze all over Eren had made you realize the severity of your mistake trying to keep Eren in your life, realize the warm feeling blooming in your chest every time he grinned at you, all teeth and his little chin dimple, was decidedly much more than a platonic appreciation for a new friend. It turned out that you’d been right from the start; you weren’t his type, and to make matters worse, his actual taste in women had been thrust in your face unexpectedly.

When you had awoken the next morning, debating on whether to fall back asleep immediately or dash to the toilet, Historia had greeted you with a sorry smile, a cup of coffee, and a quiet word of advice to look through your phone. Knowing your drunken self, you pulled up your phone calls first, wanting to make sure you hadn’t accidentally Facetimed your mom to tell her how much fun you were having or something cringe-worthy of the sort. But no, of course it had to be much worse than that.

There was a phone call– to Eren. Your call log had recorded a one minute and thirty-six second phone call between you and Eren, one you obviously didn’t remember making.

“Please tell me you were with me when I called Eren,” you groan, so naive, “did I completely embarrass myself?”

Historia blushes. “Well, he didn’t answer, if it’s any consolation–”

“Oh, thank god–”

“But that didn’t exactly stop you,” Historia fiddles with the edge of her t-shirt, “you left him a voicemail.”

Even through your throbbing headache, you shoot right up out of bed at that. “What?! What did I say?”

“I don’t know,” Historia moans woefully, putting her hands over her face, “I’m sorry, I tried to stop you, but you ran off as soon as you started talking. By the time I caught up to you, you were already hanging up.”

“So, there’s a voicemail from drunk me on Eren’s phone, and neither of us have any idea what it says?”

“Correct.”

“My life fucking sucks.”

“It’s about to get a whole lot worse,” Historia says, throwing your sheets back and snuggling beside you in the bed, burrowing her face in your shoulder, “check your texts.”

And oh, had it gotten worse. Your drunken, foolish text sat in your outbox, unanswered, unread, and inexcusable. Six months later and you were right back where you started, begging a ghost of a man to explain why he couldn’t love you.

> hi luke, i’m sorta ficked up, but i misz you. why did yoi never call me???? you owe me at leasttg that. a fcking explanation,.

Storming through campus, coat tucked around your shoulders against the biting chill, you wince at the memory. You haven’t deleted the unanswered text yet, keeping it stale in your phone as a reminder of what happens when you get too attached to people you know aren’t good for you.

You thought you’d be more heartbroken over the text to Luke and its lack of an answer, but surprisingly, you’re not. It’s Eren haunting your thoughts, Luke’s just the placeholder for all of your anger at this point. Eren isn’t to blame for all of this, you are, and that’s why you can’t bring yourself to face him, can’t bring yourself to answer any of the hesitant texts he’s sent you since that god-awful night.

You’re not in college anymore, you have to keep reminding yourself. You’re twenty-four, and you’d like to think you’re past the phase of your life where you’re handing your heart out to anyone that passes like it’s a Costco sample. You aren’t even sure if you want Luke anymore at this point, if you could even speak to him if you bumped into him these days. He had, admittedly, treated you like dirt, wrenched your heart out from your chest and left it on the sidewalk to collect dust. At least you can hate him, hate what he did to you, hate that you’re stuck on him like a broken record skipping to the same chorus every few weeks.

You can’t hate Eren, though. You can be disappointed in him for entertaining his terrible ex-girlfriend, not aloud of course because he hadn’t actually mentioned her to you himself, but you can do it internally. Even that isn’t enough to make you feel better; not only had he not trusted you, not felt safe or comfortable enough with you to share the skeletons in his closet, but he was likely zooming full-speed down a dead-end street, the way Sasha tells the story. Your heart aches for him out of a painful mixture of pining and fervent concern.

Your only solution so far has been to dive headfirst into your coursework and your students; it hasn’t done much to distract you, but with finals on the horizon, it’s not the worst method of coping you’ve come up with in your days.

Your newly invigorated dedication to your work and your courses are the cause of you dragging yourself across campus to 104, desperate for caffeine and practically a corpse after two weeks of near-constant self-shaming keeping you up at night.

The smell of the coffee shop, earthy and warm, hits you almost as hard as the blasting heat inside, and you practically slouch upon entering, the weight of the cozy atmosphere cocooning you like a warm blanket. If there’s one place that will always feel like a hug, it’s 104 Beans, your coffee shop of choice (and obligation, considering the small size of your campus) for the last six years.

Pieck, your favorite barista, greets you in her typical dreamy manner. “Hi love, same as usual?”

“Hey Pieck,” you greet her with a weary smile. As you dig around in your bag for your wallet, the extent of your exhaustion versus the amount of work you have left to do surfaces in your brain. “Actually…no, not my usual. Can I get a quad shot Americano?”

Pieck pauses where she’s scribbling onto a paper cup with a Sharpie, eyes flitting back up to you in disbelief. “A quad shot Americano?”

“A quad shot Americano.”

“Jesus,” Pieck sighs, eyes wide, “work’s that rough, huh? Black coffee not going to cut it?”

“The shakes will be worth it,” you confirm, swiping your card through the machine.

“Can I please make it a cappuccino then? You’re going to need something creamy to get all that espresso down,” Pieck looks back up at you, eyes pleading.

“Fine,” you sigh, “but–”

“Almond milk, I know,” Pieck winks at you, sliding your cup down the assembly line of baristas working amongst the hissing of the espresso machine and the pleasant, folky music floating from the speakers. “We’re a little busy, so give me five and I’ll bring it over to you.”

You smile gratefully and collect your things, turning to scout out what’s hopefully a quiet table in the corner, when a pair of arms tossed around your shoulders stops you. The familiar scent of fruity perfume tickles your nose, and you slump against the tight grip in relief.

“You made it out of the house!” Sasha’s eyes glow with pride, as if you’d just run a marathon.

“It’s not like I’m a hermit,” you roll your eyes, “I have class five days a week.”

“You don’t go anywhere besides class or your house though, so you still get participation points,” Sasha grins, shaking your shoulders, “how are you feeling?”

“Well…”

Sasha’s expression crumples. “Still that bad, huh?”

“The Luke thing was pathetic of me, but honestly, it’s not haunting me as much as I thought it would,” you admit, pausing for a moment to allow Sasha to grab her coffee from the barista when her name is called, “the one thing that’s really sticking with me is the Eren issue.”

“Like, the voicemail? Or Breeze?”

“Both. I would give anything to know what that voicemail said, but whatever was going on between us aside, I just hope he’s okay, y’know? With Breeze back in the picture and everything.”

Sasha bites into her bottom lip and glances around the coffee shop, checking every face at every table. You know that face; she’s hiding something.

“What?”

“What?” Sasha cocks her head innocently. You nearly smack her.

“You’re not telling me something.”

“Uh…okay, yeah, I’m not, but I’m not sure if I should. I mean, you’re actually out of the house–”

“I leave my house plenty!”

“You know what I mean,” Sasha scoffs, “it’s just…if you’re feeling better, I don’t want to throw you back into the deep end.”

You have no words for that, absolutely despising the way that she is completely correct. Whatever information lies behind Sasha’s bitten lip could either make you feel a hundred times better or a hundred times worse, and you’re stuck debating on whether you should gamble or not when Sasha makes the decision for you.

“Fine, you wore me down,” she sighs.

“I didn’t even say anything,” you point out, raising an eyebrow.

“You don’t have to,” Sasha says, annoyed, “you have this, like, fucking puppy dog look. Makes me sick. Get your coffee, I’ll find a table, and we can talk.”

Like clockwork, the moment Sasha steps away, Pieck grabs your attention and hands your coffee over along with an extra hot cup half-full of steamed almond milk. You look at her questioningly, and she merely shrugs.

“That’s a lot of espresso. I know you’re in, like, your depressed writer phase right now, but I figured a little extra milk would come in handy.”

“You’re the best,” you smile at her affectionately, thinking absentmindedly that you should invite her out to Scout’s sometime. Before she can respond, Pieck’s gaze lands on something just over your shoulder. You can smell him even before you turn around, musky cologne and a little hint of weed. Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck.

“Hey Pieck. Usual?” His throaty timbre cuts through the thick air, sharp as a knife. Pieck nods politely and gets to work on his coffee, forgoing a trip to the cash register. That tracks; Pieck’s hooded eyes are bloodshot more often than not.

“Excuse me,” you mutter, trying to sneak around him, but Eren’s quicker than you, side-stepping to cut you off.

“Hey stranger,” he smiles down at you, but it’s tense, nervous, “trying to run off on me?”

“Didn’t even realize that was you, sorry,” you lie, offering him a thin smile in return. You spot Sasha gaping at you across the cafe, waving her arms wildly and mouthing What the fuck?. You can’t help but feel similarly.

“It’s been awhile, how are you?”

“M’fine, just really busy with school.” God, you hate this, this awkward small talk barely parsing its way through the jungle of things left unsaid between you two. “You?”

“Fine,” Eren looks around awkwardly, shoving his hands in his pockets.

“Good,” you speak directly into your coffee, unable to stomach the emerald green peering down at you.

“You know,” Eren’s words come out quite like he can’t believe he’s saying them, “I kinda thought you were avoiding me.”

“Did you?” Your voice is caught in your throat, coming out in a pathetic squeak. Has he heard the voicemail? The startling turn the conversation’s taken must be visible all over your face, because Sasha’s flailing arms beckoning you over to the table grow more urgent.

“You haven’t texted me back, haven’t seen you in a couple weeks,” Eren’s incredibly focused on his shoes, kicking one Vans sneaker idly back and forth on the floor and making a squeaking sound, “so yeah, sort of.”

“I’m busy,” you deadpan, praying to any god you can remember the name of that you’ll just disintegrate right where you stand. Eren meets your eyes again, smirks disbelievingly.

“You said that.”

Something in his tone annoys you, something about his insinuation that he knows you’re blatantly lying, that he’s teasing you over your embarrassment, ignites a little flame in your chest. You scowl at him.

“I mean, you must be pretty busy too.”

“Why’s that?”

“Breeze just got back into town, didn’t she?” No going back now. Eren’s face blanches for a moment, features growing pale, but he manages to school his face back into that nonchalant pout that you want to slap right off his face.

“Historia told you?” He doesn’t sound surprised; in face, he sounds almost expectant, like he knew you’d find out at some point. It stakes the embers burning in your chest.

“She’s my best friend, so yeah.” This feels like an argument. It shouldn’t be an argument, but your clipped tone is pushing it in that direction. You’ve spent the last two weeks reminding yourself that you have no claim on Eren, no reason to be hurt or upset, but here you are, feeling that familiar rush of anger coursing through your veins.

“I mean, we haven’t been hanging out or anything, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“Who said I was worried?”

Eren’s eyebrows knit together, a little frown playing at his mouth. “I don’t know, I mean–”

“Look, Sasha’s waiting for me,” you point over Eren’s shoulder to the little two-top table, where Sasha has stilled within the blink of an eye, shooting Eren an innocent smile and a little wave. “I’d love to catch up, but maybe another time.”

“It was good seeing you.” Eren looks confused, albeit, a little bit hurt, and you hate it. Why is that so much worse, even worse than the sight of him with Breeze hanging off of his arm? His little pout puts a needle through your ballooning anger, and you deflate, sighing.

“I’ll see you around, I’m sure.”

“Yeah,” Eren takes his coffee from Pieck and ambles towards the door, sparing you one last glance over his shoulder. Unwilling to hold his eyes any longer, you scurry to your table, just having realized that Pieck forgot to put a coffee sleeve around your cup and that it’s been burning your hand for the last several minutes.

“Ow! Shit!” You practically crash land across from Sasha, dropping your cups in synchronicity and shaking your red palms around in the air to cool them down.

“What was that?” Sasha hisses, leaning across the table so viciously that your drinks nearly topple over.

“He just showed up!”

“You didn’t have to talk to him.”

“I didn’t try to. He just, like, materialized behind me and started talking. What was I supposed to do? Run away?”

“Little shit,” Sasha swears, glaring at the door as if her anger can shoot through it like a laser beam, cut Eren down where he’s surely almost a block down the street by now, “what did he say?”

“He asked if I’ve been avoiding him," you say, twirling your wooden coffee stirrer through your drink idly and trying to look as if your heart’s not still beating at what’s sure to be a dangerous rate.

“Well, haven’t you?”

“Yeah, but I wasn’t about to tell him that. He got all smug about it,” you scoff, the replayed scene of Eren’s self-assured smirk wiping off of his face bringing you a little bit of petty satisfaction, “until I brought up Breeze.”

Sasha’s eyes grow wide, and she looks around the coffee shop again, as if Eren or Breeze might come popping out of one of the large potted plants in the corners. “That’s actually what I wanted to tell you. What did he say about it?”

“What did you hear?” You narrow your eyes at her, and she narrows hers back.

“You first.”

“He didn’t say much, just looked really surprised that I brought her up. Said they haven’t been hanging out.”

“That’s bullshit,” Sasha snorts, rolling her eyes. Something in your chest that had begun to glimmer, something akin to hope, feels like it just got a bucket of ice-water poured over it. You cock your head, furrow your brows.

“How would you know?”

“Because Hitch and I grabbed some coffee–”

“Hitch? I thought that was a–”

“Okay, don’t crucify me, I know,” Sasha holds her hands up defensively, “it was supposed to be a one night stand, but…I don’t know. She’s cool.”

“Cool?” Even through your desperation for anything Eren-related after a two week drought, you smile knowingly at her. Sasha’s not hard to read, especially when her face goes bright red from chin to forehead.

“Yes,” she hisses, “cool. Anyway, we came by a few days ago, and Eren was here. With Breeze.”

“I mean, I expected as much.”

You’re lying, you’re so lying. The only consolation you’ve had over the last two weeks that you’re not a complete moron is the hope that maybe, just maybe, Eren’s just as forlorn as you, laying around and wishing his phone would buzz with your name on it, wishing you’d pop up at his door with a bag of popcorn ready for movie night. Instead, your worst suspicions have been confirmed, and not only is Eren very much involved with Breeze again, but he had lied straight to your face about it. Ouch.

“They weren’t like, holding hands or anything. Honestly, it looked like they were fighting.”

“Well, what did Hitch say about it?” You don’t even know if you want to know, but with your brain short-circuiting inside your skull, your mouth has free reign to seek out information that will be about as soothing as lemon juice on a papercut.

“Eren won’t talk to any of them about her,” Sasha burns her tongue on her coffee and sucks in a sharp breath, “not even Armin, apparently. She said he’s been moody lately.”

“Wonder why,” you mumble, mulling all of this new information over in your head. Breeze is bad for him, makes him crazy, you already know that. But you didn’t think it would start this soon– you feel like if anything, he should be ecstatic that his long-lost love has finally come back to him. And he can stop trying to replace her, your brain adds helpfully, only doubling the watery ache swelling in your chest.

“Who cares?” Sasha rips open a granola bar, biting into it and continuing to speak with her mouth full. “That’s why you’ve got to stop avoiding him.”

“Huh? That seems like the opposite–”

“No,” Sasha cuts you off, an air of authority in her normally chipper voice, “you’re not going to cower in the corner just because Eren’s back with his shitty ex girlfriend–”

“It’s not just because of Breeze,” you correct her, “it’s because of that voicemail. I have no idea what I said. There’s a lot that’s contributing to my self-induced isolation, trust me.”

“Regardless,” Sasha mouths around another bite of her granola bar, “the only thing that will make you feel better is being around him.”

“That sounds a little contradictory–”

“Trust me,” Sasha interrupts you again, “the best way to make a guy come around is to be up in his face, flaunting how hot and single you are, and to not give him an ounce of your attention. It’s a tried and true method, I promise.”

It turns out that you are a beacon for those with bad ideas, evidently, because later that night, you’ve ended up at Scout’s, cuddled up against the bar with Sasha despite Historia’s fervent protests. If Historia shows up later, just to “check in” (read: see what’s come of Sasha’s terrible plan), you won’t be surprised. She’s prone to being the mom friend and the harbinger of gossip, but she hasn’t shown face quite yet. It’s just you, Sasha, and a handful of regulars, sipping unreasonably cold beers and trying to act as if the early December chill hasn’t rattled you to your bones.

“This is a stupid idea,” you murmur against the lip of your bottle, trying not to seem as unnerved as you are, even after an hour of waiting and sipping. Sasha scoffs beside you, picking through your near-empty basket of peanut shells in search of a full pod.

“It’s not. He’ll be here.”

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad you dragged me out. It only took a week for me to start missing this place,” you run a thoughtful hand along the varnished wooden bartop, “but I’m just still not sure about this whole seeing-Eren-on-purpose thing.”

Before Sasha can answer, the door swings open to reveal the man in question: Eren, accompanied by Armin and Connie, as always, and sporting his standard uniform. Black hoodie, slouchy khaki pants that are tightened around the ankles, and his beat-up Vans.

You nearly sigh into your drink at how delicious he looks, only stopping when the little voice in your head reminds you that the voicemail you’d left him exists. Friends– no, strangers now? The concept of labeling your bizarre, gray-areas-only relationship with Eren brings a chuckle up your throat, one that spills onto the bar.

You can feel him watching you, but to your simultaneous surprise and disappointment, he gives you space, sidling up to the bar a few seats down from where you and Sasha are occupying a couple of bar stools. When Connie throws up a cheerful hand in greeting to you, you tentatively wave back, only for Armin to grab Connie’s attention and turn him toward the bar.

“Ha!” Sasha says triumphantly, looking at you with her eyes glowing like you’re supposed to have reached a revelation of some sort. “See?”

“Did you plot this with Connie?” You narrow your eyes in suspicion.

“No, I’m just a genius, that’s all.”

“I feel like your theory is being proven wrong, not right. He’s not even sitting near us.”

“Because you have the upper hand!” Sasha grins.

“The upper hand?”

“Yeah, he’s giving you some space so you can make the first move, get what you want out of him.”

“And what do I want out of him?” You nearly growl in your frustration, feeling silly sitting exactly four barstools down from Eren with him running through your mind as if he isn’t close enough to just hop up and hug. It’s a genuine question more than a rhetorical one; you’re not even sure what you expect out of him anymore. Another fuck? A fancy date night? A lifetime worth of radio silence, as if Eren isn’t the person you’ve connected better with than nearly anyone else in your romantic history?

Sasha’s brows furrow. “Don’t you know?”

“No! That’s what I was trying to tell you!”

“Oh,” Sasha frowns, rubs her chin, “we should have figured that part out before we came, I guess.”

“Sasha!” You whisper-hiss, ever mindful of what you’re sure to be prying ears only a few feet away. “So you have no plan?”

Sasha stumbles, stutters, and eventually, flushes bright red with a shrug. “Okay, fine, I have no plan. But at least it’s something to break up your routine of laying in bed eating chips and moping around the library.”

“You’re such a bitch.” You roll your eyes, but you don’t mean it, not really. Regardless of how things stand, at the very least you can sneak little glances at Eren, take in how good he looks– no, you correct yourself firmly. You hopped off that train of your own accord, and you’re better for it.

With some verbal manhandling, you goad Sasha into a lull of small talk, classes, anything that comes to mind. A pair of eyes finds you, not the emerald that keeps you up at night, but a pair of hazel old-and-new eyes draw to you, and you can feel the scratch of an unwelcome gaze on your skin.

“Floch’s here,” you state the obvious, sipping your drink and giving no physical indication that you’ve noticed him, staring straight ahead as you mutter to Sasha.

“Christ, this was not a good idea,” Sasha groans, face-palming.

“Wow, I sure wish that someone had suggested this was a bad idea, wouldn’t that have been nice?”

“Shut up,” Sasha says, peeking warily over her shoulder, “I think that’s Hitch in the corner, too.”

You frown, confused at the hunched, anxious change in her posture. “Why are you being weird? Go say hey.”

“I’m not abandoning you!”

“Oh, shut it. Why are you really being weird?”

“I, uh…” Sasha twirls her beer around on the counter, blushing, “I haven’t texted her back in like, four or five days.”

“Sasha! You like her, I can tell. What’s gotten into you?”

“It was supposed to be a one-night thing,” Sasha moans, letting her face fall dramatically into her hands, “and then it was movie nights and coffee and just…way beyond casual hooking up. I like her, but…I don’t know! I panicked.”

You chew on her admission for a second, selfishly comparing Sasha’s situation to your own. Was that what you were doing with Eren? No, surely not, but was that what he was doing with you? You knew he had loved Breeze, that she had wrecked him, but maybe…just maybe some small part of you wants to hope that he’s moved on, that the coffee shop sighting was a fluke.

You shoo Sasha in Hitch’s direction, demanding she run over to apologize and make nice with Hitch, partially to save Sasha’s first shot at a real relationship in years and partially because you want to stew alone with your thoughts. Before you can get too deep into your black hole of what ifs, a familiar presence is sliding into Sasha’s seat, grinning lewdly.

You sigh; it was only a matter of time before he sought you out.

“What do you want, Forster?”

“Last name only? Ouch,” Floch places a hand over his heart, drumming the fingers of his other hand on the countertop. You recognize his demeanor immediately: pupils blown wide, buzzing to the brim with nervous energy. Floch’s always dabbled in party drugs, part of why you could only stand to be around him in small doses back when you were hooking up.

“Are you coked out right now?” Mindful of Levi’s hovering presence behind the bar, you keep your voice to a low hiss.

“So you can’t call me by my first name, but you can ask such personal questions? Jesus, you really are full of it, aren’t you?”

“Floch,” you nearly groan in frustration, “I thought I made it perfectly clear the last time I saw you that I’m not interested.”

“Why are you being so mean to me, hm?” Floch snakes a hand around your shoulders, jostling you until your face is mere inches from his. You’re more than aware of a pair of green eyes nearly boring a hole in your forehead, and you feel a pang of regret that you sent Sasha away so quickly, remembering far too late that Hitch’s table doesn’t offer a great view of where you’re seated at the bar.

“I’m not being mean,” you try to push at him, but he’s locked around you, “I’m just not interested.”

“Stop being such a bitch, Jesus Christ,” Floch finally lets you shove him away from you, but he’s far from done, “when did you get so stuck up, huh?”

“Floch. Keep your voice down, and walk away.” You try to warn him; Floch may be a pain in your ass, but you’d like to believe that he’s not a bad guy, deep down. You’re too late, however.

Eren’s materialized between you and Floch before you can blink, before you can even get another word out. His sudden presence forces you out of your barstool, stepping around him to get a better read on what the hell he thinks he’s doing. Eren seems not to notice you trying to insert yourself between him and Floch, and the look on his face makes you step back momentarily.

He looks terrifying. Eren’s nostrils are flaring, eyes blown wide and jaw clenched tight. He’s taking full advantage of his height, glaring down at Floch with such menace that if looks could kill, Floch would already be laid out on the floor.

“Get the fuck out of here, dude. She said no.”

“What are you, her little guard dog?” Floch, infamous for never knowing what’s best for him, scoffs at Eren’s incredibly intimidating posture.

“Maybe I am,” Eren sneers, “I’m damn sure not going to sit there and let you speak to her like that.”

“Who’s this loser?” Connie’s to your right now, gesturing to Floch. You don’t miss the telltale clenching of Eren’s hands by his side, and it hits your dizzied mind what’s going on. Eren’s going to end up swinging if you don’t interfere, and Connie’s there for backup.

“Floch, please.” You reach a feeble hand up to Floch’s chest, trying to gently push him in the other direction.

In the blink of an eye, Floch’s grabbing you by the wrist hard enough to solicit a yelp from your lips, throwing your arm away from him with a look of disgust.

“Oh, so now you want to touch me, bitch?”

No sooner has Floch’s hand released your arm than Connie’s got his arms wrapped around you, yanking you out of the crossfire. Amidst a series of gasps, Eren grabs Floch around the back of the neck, pins him face-first to the bar.

“Jaeger!” Levi barks sharply, darting over to the scene of the commotion.

“Is that what gets you off, huh?” Eren’s nearly nose-to-nose with Floch, whose busted lip is twisted in a grimace and dribbling little bits of blood onto the varnished bartop. “Calling women bitches when they don’t want your little dick?”

“Let him go, Eren,” Armin tries to intervene, having already dashed over from his barstool. You want to back him up, but you’re frozen where you’re pinned to Connie’s chest, trembling in his arms. You know Eren’s a little rough-and-tumble, but this, seeing it in real life, is much more terrifying than you could have imagined.

“What the hell? Are you okay?” You can hear Sasha’s voice from beside you, close enough to touch but distant in comparison to where your vision is zeroed in on Eren’s grip on the back of Floch’s neck.

“Answer me!” Eren rears Floch back a few inches and slams him against the bar again. Floch curses under his breath, wriggles fruitlessly under Eren’s weight.

“Get the fuck off me, Jaeger!”

“You fucking wish,” Eren hisses, tightening his grip further, “now apologize to my girl before you make me do something I’ll regret.”

“Eren,” you find your voice again, shaking out of Connie’s grip. You fist your hands into Eren’s hoodie sleeves, tugging hard enough to get his attention. “He’s not worth it. Let him go.”

“Listen to her, Jaeger,” Levi’s already-deep voice is stained with warning.

When you pull at his sleeve a little harder, Eren turns to you, eyes still blown wide and teeth bared. It startles you, but you hold firm, setting your own jaw and shaking your head.

“Let. Him. Go. Now, Eren.” You’re not sure how you’ve managed to muster up the conviction in your voice, but you’re grateful for it, as it seems to shake Eren back into himself. Eren slowly releases Floch and in the same easy motion, he guides you behind him with one long, strong arm.

“You,” Levi points accusingly at Floch, “out.”

Floch’s jaw drops. “I didn’t even–”

“Out.” Levi’s tone leaves no room for argument, and Floch seems to understand at least that. He turns his glare back to you and Eren, scowling deeply.

“The next time I see you, Jaeger, it’s fucking over.”

“Get lost before you make me fucking embarrass you,” Eren says, voice dripping with venom. Floch shakes his head, lets his gaze land on you. A chilling smile breaks over his features.

“Next time, sweetheart.”

“Get the fuck out of here already, bro,” Connie snaps, pointing towards the exit. Floch takes his leave, sauntering towards the door with all the confidence of someone who hadn’t just been pinned against the countertop. A heavy, staticky silence falls over the bar.

“If I see you fighting in here again, it’s over.” Levi’s cold eyes fall on Eren, who nods curtly in understanding. Eren brushes his hands through his hair, rests a hand on the bun at the back of his head. Something strange is coursing through your body; something that tastes like anger, burns like heartbreak, falls bitter on your tongue like envy.

“Are you okay?” Sasha appears at your side again, wrapping an arm around your waist. “Floch’s such a psycho, I’m not even surprised he picked a fight.”

You nod numbly, eyes never leaving Eren. He finally looks back down at you, none of the heat having left his eyes.

“What the fuck was that?” It takes you a moment to realize that it’s you speaking, you throwing those words up the inches from your mouth to Eren’s. Eren’s face contorts into a frown.

“What do you mean? He was bothering you, wasn’t he?”

“So you try to fight him?” You seethe. Maybe it is anger, this bizarre, foreign emotion tingling at the tips of your fingers. No, that’s not quite it, you’re not angry you’re just…confused. Hurt that Eren’s frolicking around with Breeze, doing whatever he pleases, and yet, he’s jumping into bar fights to save you from the tangible evidence of your past.

“What do you expect me to do when someone talks to you like that?” Eren hisses back, eyes narrowed.

Sasha’s backed away from the two of you now; you’re aware of your friends staring at you, noses scrunched as they try to figure out exactly what’s happening now. You wish you had an answer to give them, but all you can muster is this heartache shooting out of your mouth in the form of daggers.

“I don’t need you,” you spit, “I don’t need your protection.”

“It didn’t exactly look like you had that handled,” Eren scoffs, rolling his eyes.

“Oh, and what are you? My knight in shining fucking armor? Don’t you have other damsels in distress waiting for you?” It’s too far, you know that as soon as the words leave your mouth, but the liquid courage Sasha had insisted upon is making your tongue sharper than you’d anticipated.

Eren rears back from where he’s hunched to meet you on your level, nostrils flaring again. Before you can utter another word, he’s got an arm thrown around your shoulders none-too-gently, practically dragging your stumbling feet towards the exit.

“Outside.”

#hehehehehe enjoy #i love plug eren so much it hurts my head #eren jaeger x reader #eren yeager x reader #eren jaeger series #eren jaeger fanfic #eren yeager series #attack on titan fic #aot fic #much ado about nothing #much ado uni #much ado universe

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absolutebl · 1 year ago

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This Week in BL - Korea drops my favorite cameo ever & gives KISSES

Entirely subjective yadda yadda. Organized sorta by favs in each category.

Sept 2023 Wk 1

Ongoing Series - Thai

I Feel You Linger in the Air (Fri grey) ep 4 of 12 - Well that’s one way to find out if he’s gay, see how he reacts to reading a het sex scene out loud. Yai is flirting so hard it’s like he knows everything.

Dangerous Romance (Fri YT) ep 4 of 12 - Oh no! I love them. Also cohabitation trope! Also ALL the other ones: hair dry, meet in childhood... GMMTV going no frills with this one.

Hidden Agenda (Sun YT) ep 9 of 12 - Zo’s drama over Pat helping Joke flirt seems awfully manufactured. I’m losing faith in this show. Could GMMTV PLEASE hand JoongDunk a decent script?

Only Friends (Sat YT) ep 5 of 10 - Sand & Ray are the only interesting couple, and I’m pretty much only watching for them. They gonna go south fast, tho, and they're already ruined by persistent singing. Ooo. When Sand said Top "stole his ex" did he mean Boston? How gay.

Naughty Babe (Sat YT) ep 2 of 8 - The pronoun conversation had a bonkers translation but I enjoyed the actuality of it. The reasons for Yi's trickery are very convoluted soap opera. But I suppose that is the amnesia trope for you.

Be Mine Super Star (Mon Viki) ep 10 of 12 - Boys. We discussed this already. No sex in onsens! I found this one dull, until the end when LLS showed up. Happy to just have him in everything. Thank you Thailand. Looks like it is a classic ep 11 DOOM next week. Who cares?

Venus in the Sky (Tues iQIYI) 1-2 of 10 eps - The usual Thai pulp claptrap this time a reunion romances in and around a convenience store between a boy who recently quit his job and his former bestie who is now a doctor. Mostly not great acting, plot, or production but the sound is okay and no bad effects or singing (so far), so that’s something. The gay brothers have a fun relationship. It’s vampy and campy but fun. I like it but not sure anyone else would.

Love in Translation (Sat iQIYI) ep 4 of 10 - The date was cute but I still don’t like the lead or the premise (we moved into Cyrano de Bergerac territory). It’s moving slowly but it seems like we might be over the crush/stalker part of the narrative, so that’s a relief.

Crazy Handsome Rich (Sun Gaga) ep 2 of 10 - I just can’t. The sound is too weird. With punch down humor and other issues incoming I may DNF this. You’ve been warned. This ep we got to see LLS with his shirt off. Did anything else happen?

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Jun & Jun (Korea Thur Viki) ep 8fin - No wonder he is everyone’s favorite hyung, boy can read the room like no one else. I love that we got to see exactly how clingy and demanding Choi Jun was always going to be. Only Lee Jun is easy-going enough to put up with him. Also I’ve never watched a KBL with more innuendo. For Korea this was… raunchy. I gotta say had Laws of Attraction not come along, Simon might have been my favorite character of 2023.

Final thoughts on Jun and Jun:

A delightful office romance about an ex-idol who joins cubical life only to find his new boss is his first love. Others boys are sniffing around too. Operative word being "sniffing" as much of this romance involves smell. With a snappy script, enjoyable sides, a pretty as peaches cast, and descent chemistry this show made up for in style what it lacked in substance. I like fluff. I loved this. I smiled every moment I was watching. With tons of rewatch potential (especially the last few eps), my only caution is this is for fans of the BL genre only, I don’t think it’ll work for anyone else. A solid 9/10 from me. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED

I like that Korea is trying high heat, but Taiwan and Thailand are leaps and bounds better at it.

Love Class Season 2 (Korea Fri Viki) eps 9-10fin -

Omg they so cute as flirty bf. Eeeeeeee! CAMEO!!!!! My fav guest couple ever! So exciting!!!! I love that they intersected with MY Strongberry couple (Private Lessons). I’m not used to this but Holy innuendo Korea, what with Jun & Jun and now this show? It’s a bit much for my gay little heart. The final episode was entirely unnecessary, but it was fun to see them being all domestic and stuff. Maru with his dumb lettuce leaves was hilarious. I feel like I need to rewatch this one to really understand it properly, so I will likely do that soon.

Summary of Love Class 2:

3 couples form within a semester of university: 1. a hyung romance reunion of exes, one of whom has a dangerous past, 2. a friends to lovers romance, and 3. a mature student and TA one night stand + complexities (many aspects of which had me laughing). I enjoyed the characters and dialogue of this show immensely. It was a little bit more breezy and friendly than I was expecting after the first installment, Love Class. I’m not entirely sure Korea can handle multiple couples like this because it definitely felt disjointed, especially the 3rd more mature couple (also my favorite) who probably should’ve had their own series. But it was definitely fun and something different from Korea. 8/10 RECOMMENDED

Also, Korea tried to give us higher heat... that was... interesting. I mean, you tried hon...?

Kisseki: Dear to Me (Taiwan Tues Viki & iQIYI) ep 4 of 13(?) - Everyone is a sad sack this ep. Ooooo. Teach/student my favorite. We never get this one. It’s messy. I’m not sure if there is a plot. I’m not sure they’re sure if there is a plot. But I am still enjoying it.

Why R U? (Korea Wed iQIYI) eps 5-6 of 8 - Why is the Fighter character always so frustrating regardless of name or country? Ji Oh stalking his crush via IG is so relatable. He’s very first crush awkward, unsure, and sweet. They also gave a nice kiss - I love the backpack drop (kiss version of a mic drop?) I still hold that if you haven’t seen the original this might not make much sense. But I am enjoying it.

My Personal Weatherman AKA Taikan Yoho (Japan Sat Gaga) ep 4 of 8 - Oh goody, another JBL where we have to pay attention solely to what they do and not what they say.

Minato's Laundromat Season 2 AKA Minato Shouji Coin Laundry Season 2 (Japan Thu Gaga) ep 9 of 12 - Big fat sigh.

It's Airing But...

My Universe (Sun iQIYI) ep 3 of 24 eps - I couldn't get hold of it and I'm not mad. I'm putting it on hold until distribution gets sorted, or icky get their shizz in order (like that'll happen).

Next Week Looks Like This:

Starting

9/15 You Are Mine (Taiwan Gaga) Secretary has to deal with grumpy boss.

9/15 Bump Up Business AKA Bump Up Project (Korea movie) suspected cinema release? I don't know much about what's going on. Last status update. Love story between a trainee who is about to debut and a celebrity from the same agency. Kpop boy group OnlyOneOf has signed up to star in this idol-based BL (based on a webtoon). They’ve been auditioning for this since Libido IMHO. You can watch me chronicle their BL MV series in this post. It’s from Idol Romance who will do sad but can do good kisses (Wish You, Nobleman Ryu, Once Again, Kissable Lips, Poongduck 304, Tasty Florida, Tinted With You).

Still To Come In September

9/26 I Cannot Reach You AKA I Can't Reach You AKA Kimi ni wa Todokanai (Japan ????) - Adapted from the manga, childhood best friends: The cool, smart one who’s good at everything, and his average, dorky friend who struggles. Always by the other’s side, but not together in the way they truly want to be. No matter how hard they try, their hearts cannot reach each other.

9/27 Absolute Zero (Thai iQIYI) - from 2021, Studio Wabi Sabi and New Siwaj finally bring us this “time loop to prevent tragedy” romance. We don’t always get HEAs from them, so I'm on my guard.

9/27 Bon Appetit (Korea iQIYI) - from 2022, 8 eps from GoGo Studio, romance between an office worker who lives off junk food and the man next door who cooks well.

9/? Mr Cinderella 2 (Vietnam YouTube?)

2023 forthcoming BL master post (see comments, some are inaccurate, NOT KEPT UPDATED).

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

I love him. And I love his version of this character better than Jimmy's.

I also love it when a show gets meta. (Both Why R U? Korea) Why they didn't just go for YRU? the world may never know.)

(Last week)

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tealeavesand-roses · 16 days ago

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Status: read Rating: 4.5/5 🌟🌟🌟🌟✨

Truthwitch by Susan Dennard (The Witchlands, #1) 🗡️👁️📜🫴🏻🧵 It's a travesty that I was unaware of this series until recently. I just finished the first book, and I'm hooked—wow. Dennard's world-building in the Witchland Series is intricate, beautiful, and, above all, magical.

Truthwitch by Susan Dennard is the first book in the Witchlands series. It is a story about two unregistered witches, Safiyah, a truthwitch, and Iseult, a threadwitch, who are on the run from various opposers, such as empires and mercenaries. Both Safi and Iseult must navigate a tense and scary political landscape. Along the way, they encounter allies and foes, including Prince Merik, a windwitch, and the bloodwitch Aeduen.

To give a little backstory, I had begun rewatching Avatar: The Last Airbender, and as with every rewatch of Avatar, my heart swooned for Zutara. Listen, the first season came out when I was 13; I fell hard for Zuko and never looked back. I also immediately questioned why he and Katara didn't end up together once the series concluded, as their chemistry and scenes were *chef's kiss* 🤌🏼. Moving on, I wanted to know if any books/series exuded similar ATLA attributes/were identical in any way. I ended up finding A Clockwork Reader's BookTube video that recommended books for fans of the Avatar: The Last Airbender series. Thus, I was introduced to the Witchlands series. 🌬️ Side note, I love that A Clockwork Reader is a shameless fan of Zutara like myself, and she mentioned how she got a chance to chat with the author, Susan Dennard, and apparently, two characters in the series were inspired by the dynamic between Katara and Zuko, which of course piqued my interest even more.

⭐️⭐️SLIGHT SPOILER⭐️⭐️

Overall, I loved this book! I haven't read a YA fantasy in a while, but it's such a good read. I'm starting book two next week; I'm swamped with homework, so I need to put that first 🙃 Also, um, I'm sorry, the phrase Aeduan said to Iseult in her native tongue quite literally tugged at my heartstrings and nearly brought me to my knees. Like-are you kidding me?! I gasped when she divulged what the phrase meant, like...that's something heartmates say to each other, not a girl you swore you'd kill the next time you'd cross paths. Lmao. They've had such minimal interactions, but I'm obsessed with them.

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r473n · 2 months ago

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Fic number 2 of the day and my first UraMayu. Now, I'm not a massive fan of Urahara, he's too shifty. But rewatching TYBW I felt like he and Mayuri got along much better than normal, and it made me think... and this came out.

Also, very much influenced by my shitty mental health atm, so be prepared for a long-winded first couple of chapters with lots of talk about depression, coping with loss, etc.

NSFW, angst with fluffy smut, UraMayu. Finished work, just needing to do final touch-ups, will post within the week.

Read on ao3

Grief

Pair: Mayuri Kurotsuchi x Kisuke Urahara

Bad TW: depression, mourning, suicidal thoughts, drug misuse, weight loss, lack of self care.

Not so bad TW: smut, fluff, oral sex, anal sex, anal fingering.

Chapter 1: Akon’s treachery

Kisuke Urahara followed the young scientist down yet another serpentine corridor, staring around in awe.

The SRDI had changed so much since the last time he’d been there, only a few months past, that he was truly grateful to have a guide. He wondered silently if Kurotsuchi had purposefully designed the new building to be such a maze or if that had been an unfortunate side effect to the ambitious size of the reform project. He had a sneaking suspicion it was the former.

He sighed to himself as he mindlessly followed the trail of smoke left behind by the cigarette held loosely between Akon’s fingers.

The war had been devastating, terrible in its cruelty. It had taken many lives and destroyed most of the Sereitei as he knew it. Yet in amongst the chaos and tragedy, he’d managed to experience a sliver of heaven.

Well, perhaps calling it heaven was a little much. After all, working with Mayuri again had it’s challenges… but it certainly had been a blessed few days. Under the time constraints and dire situation, the Captain of the 12th had pushed his old feud aside and they’d easily fallen back into their old routine as if it’d only been a day since Kisuke had been exiled.

And Mayuri had dazed him with his brilliance. As always.

He was the only soul in existence that could keep up with him, and on many occasions, it was he, Urahara, who struggled to catch up! That never happened to him! Most people’s minds were so simple that it was almost risible. But Kurotsuchi was as complex as he was difficult.

He’d felt so close to him again, working together in his private lab, developing tools against the Quincy and helping Kurosaki and his friends.

He felt ashamed to admit he had hoped the battle would last much longer. He had hoped they didn’t need to intervene.

But fate had different ideas.

And then Nemu...

Akon had filled him in on what had followed after she passed during their call.

At first, Mayuri had gone manic. For weeks he worked non-stop to rebuild the 12th, endless hours, day and night. Energised by some cursed sense of impending je ne sais quoi. A something he seemed to hope to find in amongst the wreck and rubble.

An ill-fated trepidation that had him in a constant state of overdrive. He stopped sleeping, he stopped eating. He became even more impossible to work for.

Despite surviving through hell, everyone at the division remained loyal to their captain and navigated his tempestuous moods as well as they could whilst internalising their own hardship. But the worst didn’t come until it was all finished. The day after inaugurating the new and reformed SIRD.

It felt as if Mayuri’s excitement had been in crescendo for weeks, and in the end, his bubble had burst into a huge pile of disappointing nothingness. What he had been expecting, no one knew. What was he hoping would be at the end of the rope? What did he think would happen once the hard work was done?

For as long as he could focus solely on the grind, his feelings had been nicely contained to the far corner of his mind. But once everything on the list was ticked off…

He lost it.

Badly.

He blew up, like a nuke, in the middle of the new computer room, flattening everything with his blast. He went so unhinged that Akon had to intervene, fearing he’d actually kill someone, only when Mayuri turned his attention to him he could hardly move nor speak - frozen with a cold panic he hadn’t known before. There was nothing in Mayuri’s eyes but a bitter void, his empty glare pierced through him without a glint of recognition. And Akon knew he was going to die.

It wasn’t until the edge of Ashisogi Jizo started digging into his neck that Mayuri’s features changed. A flash, a flicker, almost imperceptible if not because time had congealed for the young scientist. Mayuri had stilled his hand at the last second, leaving a tiny scar that Isane hadn’t been able to erase.

The captain had been holed up in his new quarters since, in complete isolation.

He hadn’t answered any messages. Hadn’t come out. Hadn’t ordered anything to eat or drink and hadn’t let anyone in, not even to clean or tidy up.

After two months, and many fruitless attempts, Akon couldn’t bear it anymore and called the only person he thought could reach him. Even though he knew that Mayuri would never forgive him for such betrayal.

To be fair to the young man, Urahara thought, he hadn’t technically betrayed Mayuri’s trust. He’d just called him for a friendly chat. The action was simply so alien that it triggered all of Kisuke’s alarms. When Akon extended him an invitation to visit the new institute, as homage to him for being it’s original creator, Kisuke knew with certainty something was terribly wrong with Kurotsuchi. Either that or he was stupidly walking into some twisted trap. But he didn’t think so - something in Akon’s tone had made the hairs at the back of his neck stand on end.

“And these are the Captain’s quarters. Obviously, they are out of bounds.” Said the young man offhandedly before taking a long drag of a cigarette that was mostly ash.

“I see!” Urahara’s voice sounded animated but his eyes were covered in shadows.

“Oh, sorry” Akon took a glance at a small electronic screen he just pulled out of his pocket. “I'm afraid I need to get this.”

“No worries, Akon-san! I’ll find my way back. It’s been nice seeing you.”

The young shinigami nodded, as Urahara tipped his hat, before walking away. Taking a last glance at the tall ex-captain, who was simply staring at the door and stroking his chin in thought, Akon turned the corner, feeling a pang of regret twist his stomach.

#bleach #mayuri kurotsuchi #kurotsuchi mayuri #kisuke urahara #akon bleach #uramayu #bleach fanfiction #bleach tybw

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love-little-lotte · 8 months ago

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A Look Into My New Guilty Pleasure: Poldark (2015 Series)

My biggest weakness is period dramas — especially period dramas with a talented cast, sweeping romance, terrific scenes (preferably set in some kind of country/provincial side), and lots and lots and lots of just sitting around and talking.

That's probably why Poldark has captured my heart. As a big fan of Outlander, it's no surprise that I fell in love with this show. Outlander and Poldark have so many similarities that I may make a lengthy post about it, but for today, let me just rant about my new guilty pleasure. I'm so obsessed with this show that I actually finished watching the entire five seasons in one week!

Poldark is based on Winston Graham's novels and adapted by Debbie Horsfield. I was so excited to start this show, with a male protagonist originally written by a man, created and written for a series by a woman. I haven't read Graham's novels (I'm going to one of these days, I swear!), so I'm not sure how well Debbie's adaption worked. I've read many Reddit threads, though, and some fans of the novel are not that impressed with how she omitted and added details to the show (will get back to this once I've read the books or at least the seven ones that were used in the show). The show has also been adapted in the 70s, so this was not the first time Graham's novels were seen onscreen!

Despite not having read the books, I fell in love with the story, the characters, and the cast! The show follows Ross Poldark returning to Cornwall after fighting in the American War in the 1780s. He looks forward to marrying his childhood sweetheart Elizabeth but, believing him to be dead, is now engaged to his cousin Francis. He then tries to resurrect his family's mining business and hires a young girl Demelza to be his kitchen maid (whom he eventually marries) while also crossing paths with the villain George Warleggan, a corrupted banker who stops at nothing to ruin Ross's prospects and personal life. As the show progresses, we also meet other characters, including Prudie and Jud, Ross's servants, Verity, Ross's cousin and Francis's sister; Ross's friend Dr. Dwight Enys and his love interest Caroline Penvenen; Sam and Drake Carne, Demelza's brothers, and Morwenna Chynoweth, Drake's love interest.

Yes, this show has a large ensemble cast, and trust me, there always comes a point when you hate or love them. Especially our protagonist Ross Poldark. Ross... is an interesting character. He's terribly, terribly flawed and many times times, I'm so infuriated with him to the point that I want him to suffer. I swear, you cannot go through this series without screaming at Ross. (When that moment came up in Season 2, I swear I had my middle finger ready every time Ross showed up on my screen from then on.)

But my favorite character in the show is Demelza, Ross's wife who started as his kitchen maid. She's the heart of the show, the voice of reason, and even though she makes questionable decisions along the way, you can't help but get on her side no matter what. She's the perfect fiery yet gentle match to Ross's stubbornness. He treats her like shit many times in this show, which makes me angry to no end, but they eventually grow to be understanding, loving partners.

And it also helps that Aidan Turner and Eleanor Tomlinson have one of the best romantic chemistries I've ever seen. They're terrific actors as well and they bring the characters to life so effortlessly. They just seem like they have the best time shooting this show. I kind of want to rewatch Loving Vincent now just because they're in that movie, even just in supporting roles.

Poldark is a roller coaster, with so many ups and downs (mostly downs, to be honest, please give Demelza a break!) My favorite season has got to be Season 1. Season 1 had the best Ross and I loved the early stages of his relationship with Demelza. It also has my favorite episode: Season 1, Episode 8. That episode broke me so much, thanks to Aidan and Eleanor's perfect performances. It's the only time I ever cried watching this show. I usually cry in period dramas (I've cried countless times in Outlander and Downton Abbey), but for some reason, I only cried once in Poldark. Most of the time, I'm annoyed and infuriated (hahaha but I still love it!)

The romance in Poldark is also quite unique, something I haven't seen before. Ross and Demelza emotionally hurt each other many times in this show, and they don't have the best communication. It's not an ideal marriage, but that's what makes it so raw and real. It hurts when Ross sleeps with his first love Elizabeth or when Demelza falls for the much-sensitive Hugh Armitage, but these are challenges people face all the time, and it's interesting to view it in characters and circumstances through 18th-century lenses. Plus, it can be very tiring to see perfect couples onscreen all the time. So watching Ross and Demelza's relationship thrive, suffer, and reconcile is very refreshing to me.

Nevertheless, Ross and Demelza are still able to work together. Seasons 2 and 3 showcase the worst moments of their marriage, from infidelities to insecurity, but the love between them still perseveres and they learn to forgive. In the end, they realize that they belong together.

And despite the unconventional marriage, Poldark is not a stranger to grand romantic gestures. Two of my favorite Ross and Demelza moments occur in Season 2:

A real funny, old-married-couple type of bicker in The Beach Scene:

And of course, showing all intimacy in The Stocking Scene:

(Let's just not talk about what happened 2 episodes after this!)

The romance in Poldark not only ends with Ross and Demelza. We also got two really good couples in the series: Dwight and Caroline and Drake and Morwenna.

And these love stories don't just happen! They're fleshed-out characters with proper backgrounds and their own problems, especially Drake and Morwenna's relationship. Morwenna is one of my favorite characters, and she doesn't deserve all the shit thrown at her. The last season of Poldark is not the best (bordering on bad, actually, especially the last two episodes), but watching Drake and Morwenna get their happy ending is worth it.

Finishing all five seasons is bittersweet. I enjoyed most of the story and fell in love with different characters. I kind of regret watching everything in one week haha. But what can I say? As soon as I finish each episode, I'm so tempted to start another episode. I think the last time I stayed up until 5 AM the next morning to watch TV shows was Yellowjackets. Poldark's just too good to binge! It's one of my favorite TV shows now. Maybe I'll watch Sanditon next...

I want to write more about Poldark soon, maybe a comparison with Outlander or maybe just a post about each character. I realized I hadn't talked much about Elizabeth, Francis, and George in this post; I was too preoccupied with the love story aspects and Ross and Demelza. We'll see!

#poldark #poldark 2015 #ross poldark #demelza poldark #aidan turner #eleanor tomlinson #period drama #tv shows #a bit of a rant #current obsession!!!!

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thisbuildinghasfeelings · 10 months ago

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Hi! I will be starting us off with the fic rec game this week! I can't believe we're already on Week 4...and the penultimate week of Season 1!

Here are the prompts for this week’s fic rec game:

Fics occurring in mid to late Season One (This week’s episodes: 1x07 Bum Steer & 1x08 Monster Inside) and featuring:

Buttercup!

Billy and Owen as friends/rivals/frenemies/etc.

Owen, TK, and the rest of the 126 coping with Owen's cancer diagnosis and what it might mean for the future

TK in his gunshot-related coma

Carlos coping with his strong feelings after seeing TK in a hospital bed

the 126 gathering in a hospital waiting room

The rules are simple: every week there will be a different prompt, and everyone is encouraged to share a fic (or a few!) recommendation that meets the prompt and tag a few fic-reading friends. The game can be played all week, so no pressure to post right away. I will kick us off with a few recs and then I’ll tag some folks below to get us going! Please feel free to use the banner above, to make your own, or to not use one at all!

Finally, please use the tag ‘Rewatch Read-Along Week 4’ and at the end of the week @911lonestarrewatch will post the link to the tag for the comprehensive list of fic recs!

Thanks to @guardian-angle22 for the banner!

Collateral Damage by @paperstorm

This is the 1x08 installment of the Missing Moments series giving us the events of the episode from Carlos' point of view. It also contains a line that's a favorite of mine, when Carlos says to coma TK “I haven’t convinced you to let me love you, yet.” 😭 I think about this line all the time!

Lucky Dog by @lightningboltreader

This is an adorable little AU meet-cute featuring Buttercup as TK's wingpup.

Something to Lose by @thatnerdemryn

A look into what was going on in Carlos' mind when the shooting happened and as he sat by TK's hospital bed. He's feeling some strong feelings!

echoes by @redshirt2

Carlos bonds with the 126 for the first time in the hospital waiting room. I particularly love this one because it emphasizes how much love entered Carlos' life when he met TK. He didn't just get a soulmate, he got a whole family!

take me back to the light by @reyesstrand

This post-1x08 fic was written immediately after the episode aired so it's essentially a lovely little canon-divergent AU now. It particularly makes me wish that Carlos had been there when TK woke up from his coma and also makes me wonder how that might have changed things. At the very least, I think TK would have felt some feelings at actually seeing Carlos next to his hospital bed!

Tagging some fic readers who might have recs to share: @lemonlyman-dotcom @paperstorm @carlos-in-glasses @reyesstrand @strandnreyes @redshirt2 @bonheur-cafe @alrightbuckaroo @herefortarlos @im-overstimulated-and-im-sad @heartstringsduet @liminalmemories21 @lightningboltreader @fangirl-paba @reyestrandd @chicgeekgirl89 @firstprince-history-huh @noxsoulmate and OPEN TAG for anyone else who wants to share some fic recs!

#Rewatch Read-Along Week 4 #911 lone star rewatch 2024 #911 lone star #911 lone star fic #911 lone star fanfiction

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aenslem · 2 months ago

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I was tagged by: @itwasmagic <3 last song listened to: keldian - im the last of us favourite colour: black, blue, purple idk it changes depending on my mood lately, but usually black is always there for me currently reading: I started so many things and have not finished any of them T-T does it mean Im currently reading all of them? :') okay, the last thing I tried to continue was igor grom comic book... my page does say Im reading mdzs novel, but tbh it's just me going back to it once in a while reading 1 or 2 pages and then forgetting about books for weeks again... currently watching: agatha all along, but like at this specific moment Im rewatching voyager last movie I watched: the marvels sweet, spicy, or savory: sweet relationship status: I have a cat current obsessions: agatha x rio, if it was not obvious lmao tea or coffee: green tea last thing I googled: something takes up space on disk c, so I was trying to find how to figure out what takes all the space, when all the folders sizes are not so big T-T

no pressure tags: @evviejo @purlturtle @isagrimorie and whoever wants to do it

#text #tag game

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carlos-in-glasses · 11 months ago

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Rewatch Read-Along

Thank you for the tag @lemonlyman-dotcom and @thisbuildinghasfeelings 🧡💛🧡💛 (using the banner by @guardian-angle22)

Rules: This week’s prompt: a begins fic that you loved. A begins fic (‘begins’ coming from the 9-1-1 origin-story episodes) will delve into the backstory of a character before canon. Please feel free to use the banner above, to make your own, or to not use one at all! Finally, please use the tag ‘Rewatch Read-Along Begins’ and at the end of the week @911lonestarrewatch will post the link to the tag for the comprehensive list of fic recs!

------

I have three recs for this!:

The Kind You Can't Get Away From by @heartstringsduet - which follows TK's youthful mishaps and his addiction - and his love of lizards and nature. It's absolutely gorgeous and inspired the beautiful artwork by @fitzherbertssmolder that I commissioned for Michelle's birthday, linked here!

To Build a Home by @freneticfloetry - A Carlos begins that is so well-written I didn't know what to do with myself after I'd finished it. It's an absolute knock-out and a must read, especially if you're looking for fics that really dig deep into a particular character or are looking for a lesson in character study.

Precious Love by @rmd-writes - This explores TK grappling with his lack of self-worth in his young life, until he meets Carlos and realises he deserved love all along. I remember being absolutely wrecked by the child-TK sections. Like the above two, a must-read, heart and soul. Beautiful writing!

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With no pressure tagging those I mentioned above, and @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut @alrightbuckaroo @herefortarlos @lutavero @ladytessa74 @beckym2001 @reasonandfaithinharmony @reyesstrand @redshirt2 @danieljradcliffe @bonheur-cafe @lightningboltreader @welcometololaland @wandering-night19 @eclectic-sassycoweyes @sznofthesticks @im-overstimulated-and-im-sad @sarnagati @theghostofashton @paperstorm @strandnreyes @tailoredshirt AND OPEN TAG ❤️🩷🧡💛💚💙🩵💜

#Rewatch Read-Along Begins #cig tagged #fic rec!!!

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thetwilightroadtonightfall · 3 months ago

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1/2 So this is driving me crazy cause I only noticed it after my hundredth rewatch of khux, but do all the cutscenes involving the union leaders only take place in like 4~ish days? I know UX is suppose to take place over a year, but when looking at the cutscenes with just the union leaders I think I counted like 4 days lol. I think the first day is from when they meet in the graveyard to when they enter the foretellers chamber for the first time cause Skuld tells them "not the touch anything".

no yeah you’re on the right track here!!

We have no hard confirmation for the timeline of…any of the union leaders scenes, really. But we do know that a lot of the scenes do happen in tandem and consecutively or like you said, within the span of a few days. Let me follow things with you…

Shift Pride’s the tricky part because that could’ve happened at literally any point after they began working on the Spirit Pets. Could’ve been a week, a month, a year. I like to think at least 3 months passed offscreen to account for them settling into their new responsibilities, getting to know each other better, and Player going to some disney worlds in between. The way they talk in the Shift Pride scene also suggests that a “substantial” amount of time has passed since they met at the graveyard. Like for example, Ephemera asks if they all remember reading about Shift Pride in the rulebook. He wouldn’t be asking if that they’d all just read it a few days prior, you know what I mean?

Following along the next scenes…yeah, it checks out. Lauriam meets Elrena, then returns to the tower. Then I assume he meets Player later the day after, since Eph says he wants to spend the day with them (implying “an entire new day”). Then the glitches happen and Eph and Player go off to Game Central Station. I’d guesstimate Eph is there for the rest of that day, and returns to Daybreak later that night.

Everything that happens after Eph returns from GCS (aka the impostor leader stuff, Maleficent vs Lauriam, Lauriam’s breakdown) happens concurrently with the rest of Player’s time in Candy Kingdom, which could reasonably be an additional 1-2 days maybe? And then they return to Daybreak just in time for the fight against Darkness

The next possible timeskip we get is after Ven’s sacrifice, where he’s unconscious. I can’t imagine it’s more than a day though, since Darkness just informed them that the world is ending, so there’d be that sense of urgency to get the lifeboats and everything all set up. I’d say maybe a few hours passed. And everything that follows in the finale happens consecutively.

So if we wanna approximately add it up…the union leaders’ collective screen time would encapsulate a week or less than a week’s worth of in-universe time. (4 days like you said seems reasonable, I’m just overshooting it a bit to provide some leeway.)

So in conclusion, we only got to see about one week of the time the union leaders spent together. Which is really insane to think about if you ask me!!

#asks #khux #chi infodumps #damn…now /I’m/ really thinking hard about all this (/pos)#I’d have to sit and watch all of the cutscenes to be REALLY sure about all this but as of right now this makes sense to me #side note: I like to think that in-universe all the post-war stuff takes place over the course of a year /at the very least/#which makes this whole thing even more nuts #that would mean that union cross covers the same amount of time as days does!#lives really do be changing drastically over the course of one year I guess…..

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crazykuroneko · 7 months ago

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Rewind the Tape — IWTV S1E04 Rewatch

Finally, I'm back with my rewatch for @iwtvfanevents after having to microdosing Ep 4 because of limited time, mood, and I just fell unconscious once I hit my bed. Again, FYI from before: this is my first time rewatching the show (excluding indirect watch through YouTube reactions), and its purpose for me to refresh my mind and noticing things. So, I won't dwell on certain ongoing or past theories, but I'll take notes about the possibilities I notice as the rewatch goes for myself. Also, disclaimer, because I've had people put words into my mouth before: When I'm assuming the reason a certain character does what they do, it's not to give them an excuse. It's my way of trying to understand what the writers have in their minds. For me, if the action of a character doesn't make sense in that character's eyes, based on their personality, then it's bad writing.

Okay, that's long enough. Be careful with the S2 spoiler alerts. Time to meet ✨ Claudia✨

• It's been 10 years since Daniel published a book and his publisher seems questioning his ability to write a book.

• Armand barely gets any sunlight here.

• *Googling* Levodopa is used to reduce Parkinson's symptoms, like tremors, stiffness, and slowness, which are caused by lack of dopamine. It works by being converted to dopamine in brain.

• "Electronic mailbox" Armand, you're so funny.

• Resting? Wait, have they ever did an interview during mornings before? Ep 1, it's night. Ep 2, during dinner time to late at night. Okay, it seems Ep 3 starts in the day to night. Gonna pay attention to this more.

• The interior designer is a woman. "Louis is missing the 'natural' world" What tree is that again? I'm bad with plants.

• Claudia wrote her name and the year on her first diary. Cute. (But ofc she probably stopped doing that after Loustat read her diaries)

• They arrived in Paris November 14, 1945. A week after Lestat's birthday, fyi. There's a headcanon Armand's (it seems people got it from a wikia, which was taken from an official calendar, but no one has checked that calendar) is November 11.

• They're in Ploiesti in 1941, eating POWs.

• My caption doesn't write it, but Lestat says, "Impossible. Elle est trop jeune." (She's too young) Oh, Louis 😔

• "I just need her not to die". And Lestat probably recalled Louis crying on their bed over not able to have a child, and there they went to doom themselves and Claudia. Anything (because unlike Louis, he knows all the consequences) to keep Louis happy AND stay with him.

• The contrast between Louis' and Claudia's transformation. Lestat doesn't let her to drink much, just enough to turn her. There's no gentleness or anything when Lestat holds her. In fact, the camera stays on his rough hold, highlighting the ugliness of it. Isn't in the books being turned without consent seen akin to rape?

• "Hell demons" lol. I wonder when she got his first diary and when she arrived at that conclusion.

• "It's my new house?" "It is if you want it to be" as if she has another option. Louis, you're so funny.

• Delaying to tell Claudia that she needs to feed on humans. Telling her there's another "choice" than eating humans. Expecting Claudia to feel regret the next day after killing a human. Louis, stop putting your own feelings in her.

• "He has to relay on my words to understand me. Just like humans." "We are a family?" Monsters who have to keep a bit of humanity to get along, who are also playing house like humans.

• You could tell Lestat is already sensitive about being left out in the telepathic conversation since the beginning.

• Claudia witnessing queer relationship for the first time is so amusing lol

• Claudia says ACAB 😌

• This scene doesn't feel "smooth" to me. I don't know if it's the editing or the writing. First, that last line by the cop is too long for such a short action. Second, i think they could pick a better intonation for "not a cop" there. Plus, the placement makes it feel like they almost forgot to put it.

• Claudia needs twice amount of blood than Loustat. She's still energetic when the sleep time comes. Noted.

• "Kill juice" Lestat and Claudia are bonding over vampirism.

• "Have you seen my slippers?" "Under the chair by the window" The domesticity uwu.

• The lines about Lestat talking about Claudia's writing habit are so witty when you remember he canonly writes the Vampire Chronicles books. A platonic kiss for IWTV writers again.

• Claudia's new coffin is called The Feathered Nest. A call back to Louis saying him in Lestat's nest in Ep 2.

• Since the beginning, Claudia likes to ask and figure out things that she doesn't know, while Louis won't say anything to not rock the boat.

• "We try to accustom her to the thought of coming home to God" Oh gosh, Louis is so bad at lying 😭

• Okay, seriously. We know in Ep 2, after Louis is just turned that /at least/ his sight and hearing becomes more sensitive. And in this episode, Claudia can smell the cop's blood from afar. But this lore doesn't consistent with the stinky bodies at their home in Ep 5 and the fact Claudia can stalk Lestat many times (and ofc Claudia and Louis at Antoinette's place in Ep 6 as well). This uncontinuity gives me a headache. OR after they manage to control their senses (Lestat's saying "focus on my voice, a single strain"), their senses basically become normal and only can do more when they willing it? I'm trying to make sense of it here.

• "I miss sleeping with you." So, in good days, they sleep together in Louis' coffin. They /probably/ haven't been doing it since Antoinette thing started (I mean, I wouldn't). That's 8 months. (The sanctioned infidelity narration is on Feb 1917, Claudia started to write her diary in late Sept 1917 and she still sleeps with Louis by that time. Based on this timeline)

• "Sometimes, you gotta be careful where you dig, you understand?" Not to fast forward to S2, but this sounds so ominous.

• Louis in the night with this pink striped shirt 🥰

• "Is that what he's up to when he goes out alone?" No wonder stalking Lestat is the first thing she does after Charlie.

• Do I believe Louis' answer is true? I do, because writing-wise, I don't see there's any reason for Lestat to cheat (as in having a relationship with someone else, because I could see him still making out with humans before eating them) when they keep spending their time together except when Lestat is hunting and Louis and Claudia go out together like in this scene. Plus, unlike in Ep 6, during this era Claudia still follows the no telepathic talking rule. (See: Claudia's "I'll tell Uncle Les you talk to me this way" later) Something, I assume, makes Lestat feel alienated from the two and goes to cheat to find a connection with another on his own. But I digress.

• "Used to caught up in human affairs. Then you."

• Okay, at least Daniel waits Armand to finish his sunnah prayer before interrupting him, though Armand should continue doing his Ashr prayer soon. Anyway, i wish they used adhan that's clearer. I mean, I could only listen the beginning of each phrase, not the end.

• Claudia throwing a thing at Lestat and he barely reacted and proceed to pick it off the floor right away. For a period of time, Claudia is indeed the queen in that house. "This was given to me by a marquis..." If that's from Lestat's father, which makes that a family heirloom, and he gave that to Claudia. That means big for a Provider man like Lestat. (hashtag me and Lestat loved Claudia once propaganda) They are supposed to have 6 years of "good time".

• "When they can't (figuring out their problems), I can always get between them and make it right." Claudia is literally a band-aid. I suppose she helps them communicating because as I said in previous episodes, Loustat tend to not address the real problem, just shift to something that will make them feel better and forget it until it comes up again.

• *S2 spoiler alert* No, never think about how Claudia's interest in acting probably grew from the times Loustat bringing her to watch picture shows and Lestat acting them out in front of them. And in the end, it's what makes her fall into the trap of the troupe easier in S2. No, we're fine.

• "Know what her last words are?" I love her psychopath side, obsessing over last words after being called a devil in one.

• Oh, Grace's inflection when saying "uncle". They have heard a lot of homophobic jabber and satanic accusations from Florence over the years, no doubt.

• This is from Claudia's POV, so it's interesting how she's paying attention and remembers to write it down.

• Louis really has put down his dutiful son and brother "hat" after having a family himself.

• I think this is probably the last time Claudia admits she has a lot in common with Lestat *insert xie lian's idk whether i have to cry or laugh here*

• That scene of Claudia eating the guy is so classic horror, complete with the blood splatter on glass. Love.

• Lestat really brings her to Lovers' Lane without thinking about the effects. He probably thinks because her appetite stays big like a kid, her mind will stay like that forever.

• "I don't remember buying that outfit" Lestat bought all Claudia's outfits ofc. (I don't regard interviews as part of canon, but Sam did say that Louis chose Claudia's outfits)

• My theory: Lestat could notice when Claudia and Louis telepathically speaking if he pays attention to their expressions. I mean, he clearly has a thing for being alienated by telepathic connection (for a good reason, if they adapt that part of the book, cmiiw), so it makes sense if he just can tell.

• THE HORSE IS CALLED BELLA LOL

• She really has a crush on the first good man she meets. So adorable, if not for her monologue

• She knocks the railing every time she walks towards Loustat's room? Oh I would like to know the backstory that causes this rule/habit 👀. But if it's a rule, it's an interesting when you recall Lestat's "Child. Intervening the romance of the parents" or something like that in Ep 6.

• Waiting on balcony just like her father in Ep 1. The writers are strong with their "Evil of my evil" propaganda.

• Claudia figures out how to block people's thoughts since teenager. Louis has never had a reason to do it

• Again, Claudia is such a curious girl. She dives right in with Charlie

• Sorry, but the editing in this episode is kinda sloppy. I keep noticing things 😭

• This connection Claudia has with last words. It's been awhile but I wonder if we'll get to see it again. *S2 spoiler alert* Perhaps Madeleine says something to her before you-know-what. Or Claudia says something to Louis instead. I just love patterns yknow.

• Daniel Hart is just slaying in the background with his music.

• Vampires feel "loose" when they're aroused, which leads to become very bitey.

• That's why she goes to find out how vampirism works right away. Suddenly Lestat can't do what he did to her. She realizes she knows nothing about her current life

• That scene of Lestat and Claudia at the incinerator... Past Louis doesn't know they're burning Charlie and what exactly what Lestat says there. Imagine reading the latter in her diary.

• The transition from Lestat's whole speech about not being close to a mortal to Daniel 🤌🤌🤌

• If Daniel is true that Louis has had all of the diaries in '70s, so my guess Louis doesn't look fine at all in the flashback is right. He's "wearing hats" again.

• I wonder what Louis wanted to say. But knowing him and judging from his reaction to Daniel's brashness, it's something that sugarcoats Claudia's position in their "family"

• The way Claudia knocks the railing but then it goes weaker, she doesn't really care about the houserules or childish habits anymore

• The last scene is a nice hint/nod to you-know-what, but also I once read someone saying that what she does is the equivalent of a teenager doing self-harming when they're depressed, and I can't unsee that anymore. I think that's a spot-on.

• This is the last episode we hear "In Throes in Increasing Wonder" as a closing music btw. You know, the music that represent Loustat's love. They really say we're going downhill

Summary:

For the previous episodes, I always finished my rewatch and tried to figure out what theme of that episode. Of course it's always about Louis because this is Louis' season first and foremost. But for the theme of this episode, I think it's: Louis' first meeting with Claudia and the first time he has failed her. The first part is obvious, the second part, like I said above, Louis only finds how far Lestat's action is to Claudia after he reads her diaries later. I think, he sees that as his first failure to her; unable to stop Lestat making it worse for her. And we will see Claudia criticize this more in Ep 6.

This episodes also shows Louis' misconception about Claudia. He expects Claudia to react the same way to vampirism as he is. And we will see more of this in the later episodes (but of course the most obvious one is in Ep 7)

This episode is in Claudia's POV, but I like to call it "the closest thing to ideal life Louis has ever gotten", at least until Charlie happens. Like Lestat says in the church scene, Louis wears a lot of "hats": being the good son and good executive in charge of their fortune for his family, being the good straight man, being the good savvy businessman for his family and his own people, and later being a good vampire for Lestat. This time, he gets to take most of them, if not all, off and focus himself wholly on Claudia and Lestat, his family. He says himself, Claudia's existense silences all the noise, chaos, the crisis of his former existence. He has a daughter who has literal telepathic connection to him, someone who can know what he feels without saying anything. Someone by whom he doesn't feel being judged because he can know what she thinks. He has a husband who spends most of his time with them as a family. Who takes their daughter together to shop, Louis choosing the stuffs, Lestat paying for it. Who protects their family when they need to fulfill their daughter's needs (see: the buying coffin scene). Who also has a quality time with their daughter, even though it's mostly about killing humans. Unfortunately, it's rigged to burn, because Claudia won't be a child forever despite her body, outgrowning the very particular role Loustat need from her to maintain their play house.

Oh, I almost forgot, I wonder what the arrangement is with Louis' diet during this happy period. He doesn't do as much action as he did in previous episodes and we do see him eating animals still, but it looks like his sex life is thriving. He has control over his emotions pretty well. So, I assume he doesn't starve himself completely. At least, not as bad as he did before. Perhaps, this is one of the problems Claudia says she has "to smooth out". Though we know later she has never said directly to Louis how she actually doesn't completely agree with his diet choice from Episode 7. *S2 spoiler alert* And we know he later decides to eat human every other day to survive their European trip. My long time theory is Lestat manipulates him into drinking from him at least once a week as a solution. (and that's why he's more powerful than his book counterpart when he's not completely starving himself) 🤔

By the way, since this is the middle of the season, I'd like to say I think this is overall my least favorite episode so far. Mostly from the technical side, but I still love how they sprinkle hints of Claudia's own personality. I think my most favorite episode overall is Ep 1. I just love how their built Louis' personality in it. The performance is crazy, and the directing set the tone of the rest of the season. The directing in Ep 3 is top notch as well, especially towards the end. You really could feel the growing tension. The writing weaving all this history and race problem into Louis' personal life is genius as well.

#interview with the vampire #iwtv #rewind the tape #vampterview #iwtvfanevents #tw rape mention #tw ED mention #moi.txt

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exoticalmonde · 7 months ago

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Arknights - Zwillingstürme im Herbst Event (Day 1)

HEY, Zwillingstürme im Herbst is here and I CANNOT pronounce a single of the German words they are using, I think I might just end myself here. For some reason, the update was loading extremely slowly, but it was long enough to get us through those pesky 10 minutes we had to wait until the server was open.

On the flip side, we have a bunch of cool new things to look at and a reason to rewatch the trailers and cinematics + review the music that comes with the event.

Warning: The following content goes over obvious stuff about the event and the characters that I plan on working on + my personal ideas for who is useful in what way.

At the END of the post is a guide for the music tunes you need for the interrogation event. As far as I have gotten at least.

Since it's Arknights' sixth celebration event we expect a LOT of content, a long story, probably a daily check-in for missions inside the event itself and much more. The banner for Viviana and Virtuosa Arturia (being the Limited operator) lasts a whole three weeks, with every day carrying a single free pull.

Oh the joys of saving for Zuo Le and Logos knowing that I really do want Viviana is a bittersweet sensation. I'm going to get Lessing today at least, so we can be content the husband team stays strong.

Not to forget the free 10-pull we get along, which got me a single Baseline.

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When it comes to the videos and PVs we got, they're actually an insane amount in comparison to other events. Of course, the anniversary has something to do with that, but it's also because the characters we are getting and the story that is meant to unfold is very important to the Arknights world.

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This is the official trailer that introduces us to:

all the new characters,

flashing us with the gorgeous medal set,

the skins that are coming out WITH the anniversary event,

the new characters in the red ticket shop

operator archives for: Czerny, Rosa, Diamante, Santalla, Shalem

modules for Mudrock, Penance and Vulcan

+ Lessing, Baseline, Nearl Alter, Bagpipe,

new furniture sets

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Naturally, there is no event without the PV. This is from the POV of Viviana.

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The event teaser is subsequently the introduction video as you enter the event.

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I watched this just now for the first time and it's equally horrifying to see the Aegir, charming to see her get along with kids, saddening since I know this is her at her mother's funeral and also it makes me absolutely insane to think that I feel anything but resentment for her and everything she's done to Ebenholz and Kreide.

I know she is going to make a huge mess in Leithanien again, I know it.

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I feel a little smitten for the reason we are getting an ENTIRE introduction to the University. I can't even imagine how it's going to come to play inside the story itself. But I am glad that there's more embracing of the regional tongues now.

Fondly, I was reminded the other day how I started playing when there was only the Chinese and the Japanese (and Korean?) voiceover. Now there is German, Italian, Russian along with the English.

How... Unfortunate, we might never be able to hear French.

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As far as I'm familiar, I think Ripples is meant to be the music for both the Candleknight and Arturia.

UPDATE: OF COURSE ARTURIA WOULD HAVE HER MUSIC VIDEO COME OUT TODAY WHEN I MADE THE POST ABOUT IT YESTERDAY BUT WHAT ELSE DO I EXPECT, HERE YOU GO

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There is this video that isn't on YT but it's on the Arknights Twitter page, so I'm going to link it anyways for anybody who wants to see enamel pin-like designs of Bassline, Arturia and the others. It's basically character showcase but in some different form.

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I love the character intros but more than anything I enjoy reading Travel Guides because this means these places are going to be super important to the lore itself and I am EXCITED!!!

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Most of the enemies are very easy to deal with as long as you know the base mechanic and don't get too taken away by the music. The ones with a purple sphere on their heads need EXCITED music to neutralize their special skill and those with a yellow star need MELANCHOLIC music to calm down.

Long story short, the Tuning Nodes need to be all active at the same time and the place where you see that jellyfish shield is the place you need to avoid placing operators because they just won't do anything for the Node itself.

Attack Speed gained from the Exciting music is stackable for your operators. I don't know to what point, but Dr. Pinkie was having a blast learning this last night.

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Speaking of the characters and Baseline specifically, he's a Lupo from Leithanien, appointed in the year 1100 (the year the story is set in as well) as a sort of mediator between RI and the Leithanien Imperial court. He's uninfected and his role is Defender, specifically Guardian aka Medic Defender. Real name Michael Wolfgang, tiniest Schatz because he's only 160cm tall and pretty much the same size as Greyy-alter me thinks. Birthday is on the 16th of July.

From what I imagine, I can use him instead of Nearl/Gummy or Spot since his Skill 1 heals operators only if they are under 50% and his Skill 2 stops attacking and concentrates on healing + gives the ally a shield.

I haven't done the speed/strength comparisons to Nearl but VS Gummy, his skill 1 charge is 6 seconds and the difference is only 20% additional healing at M3 for a cost of an additional 1DP at all E stages.

To me, that's good enough to exchange honestly if you're looking for more tankiness due to his Talent.

If we overlook the cost of maxing out a 5-star in comparison to a 4-star.

AND NOT TO MENTION HIS TOKEN IS--- I mean, if you insist I have it, sure, but I feel like the mouthpiece of any instrument is important to the player in their own way... right?

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Lessing is the free 6-star operator you get in the event by competing the missions in Herzenfolgen. It's unlockable after you finish stage ZT-2 and it comes with 3 (technically 4) characters you can get event materials from including Lessing's Potential.

He's a Guard, specifically a Dreadnought (or as it's also popular - a Duelist Guard) whom I immediately am looking at as FINALLY there is something I can use instead of Melantha when I get asked for someone of that type. You'd think that out of all the guards I do have already there's going to be someone who does as much damage as Melantha and equal in health, but no.

Since Mel is a 3-star character and only reaches level 55 E1, I'm going to compare them like this: Lessing does more damage, has more health and defence than Melantha. His Redeployment time is 10 seconds more than her though.

Skill-wise Lessing's Skill 1 is an Offensive Recovery (charges itself when hitting enemies) like Hoederer's that does additional damage on the charged strike sans health regen.

Skill 2 is like a buff on his first talent: Pain Focus (this is at E1) - When blocking, take 20% less Physical and Arts damage from enemies not blocked by this unit. So that means that at lvl 7 of his skill you apply the maths that I am NOT going to math myself. At least not while Dr. Pinkie is sleeping to check them for me. When deployed, 1st Talent effect increased to 2x, ATK +35%, and attacks become 2-hit combos. His Skill 3 is what people get him for: Become immune to Negative Statuses, HP +80%, and attacks deal 180% ATK as Physical damage when attacking a blocked target Skill can be used when Operator is affected by a Negative Status, removing the status, but dealing 600 Arts damage to self.

So far as I can read while my Lessing is cooking in the training room - yes, you might be able to kill him if you use his skill and he's under 600HP.

My little Hoederer, big sword - big damage wielder. The only saving grace for Melnatha is that she's 13 DP at max potential while Lessing is 21. That's a lot to consider.

And of course, he is a cutie patootie in his letter, I'm crying.

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Here is the guide offered by the Twitter page for the Herzenfolgen because otherwise, I could not grasp a single word of the explanations inside the event itself.

To explain it in simple terms:

Every day you get 3 people who will tell you a story and according to the information they give you, usually the important part is in red, you have to figure out what sort of emotion they have felt and then you have to align them to the 'desire' they have.

Making a mistake 2-3 times gives you the emotion and the 'desire' so it's not impossible to figure out, but it's a lot of experimenting as well until you get both right. And the notes you get are exhaustable, so you need to farm for them to know.

Dr. Pinkie also told me yesterday that the cards you DO manage to use also disappear.

Whenever you complete the day you get an Authorization Warrant to unlock the case-related characters and then you get a pot for Lessing every time you finish those.

You get 2 a day actually I think. Since I already managed to squeeze 4.

Here's all the emotions since some of the guides I found kind of misnamed the emotions and I had to spend a long while staring to get it to actually work.

TO GET THE FINAL ONE: DIE REISE (Tomorrow's Opus) you just have to complete all of the main interrogation nodes.

With that, I wish you good luck, enjoy the music of Zwillingstürme and I hope that you enjoy the music as much as I do. My favourite theme so far is 'Under the Spires' and 'Anger's Opus'.

WHICH, I almost forgot, YOU CAN FIND ON SPOTIFY AS WELL, IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL!

#arknights #doctor of ri shenanigans #arknights event #doctor arknights #arknights Lessing #arknights Virtuosa #arknights Viviana #arknights Baseline #arknights Leithanien #arknights music #arknights PV #arknights video #Gacha #friendship #Spotify #Youtube

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