#revenge and friendly fire I take very seriously

[sun-e-chips]

Eagerly waiting for Artfight so I can get you

Oh ho HO!

Fair warning I revenge EVERYONE

So be prepared!!!!!!

I am so looking forward to it! :D

I cherish all of my attacks and am never normal about them hehe

[wangxianficfinder]

SOS help emergency im going on a 19-hr flight soon and im going to need some reading materials. so if y'all could drop your fave long fics so i could download them to read, that would be most awesome 🙏🙏🙏 thank you so much for everything you do your blog has introduced me to so many wonderful fics <3

You know what to do everyone! We need to help Anon not be bored on their very long flight ~ send in some long fics for them to read ^^

- Mod C

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Jumping in to rec 💖 love, in fire and blood by cicer (E, 360k, wangxian, immortal WWX, slow burn, pining, arranged marriages)

~Mod L

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Many trigger warnings! Take them seriously. But this is a good one: burning camellias by AvoOwO (M, 284k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Sunshot Campaign, Prisoner of War, WWX is a Mess, Genius WWX, Torture, Aftermath of Torture, Blood and Violence, Blood and Injury, BAMF WQ, BAMF WWX, BAMF WN, POV WWX, Hurt WWX, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Non-Consensual Body Modification, Sentient Burial Mounds, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault, Attempted Sexual Assault, No Golden Core Transfer, WWX Has No Golden Core, Poisoning, Smart WWX, Protective WQ, WWX & WQ Friendship, Medical Torture, Cannibalism, WWX & WN Friendship, PTSD, Dubious Consent, Consent Issues, Heavy Angst)

on restitution by glitteringmoonlight (M, 98k, LSZ & WWX, WWX & JL, wangxian, dark JC, not JC friendly, captivity, non-graphic torture, angst w/ happy ending)

Ok ok. So it’s not a loooing fic. But it’s worth downloading for a plane trip: a thousand hills, no birds in flight | 千山鳥飛絕 by defractum (nyargles) (E, 26k, WangXian, Mythology, Canon-Typical Violence, Canon adjacent setting, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort)

Death of a Ghost by Gotcocomilk (E, 107k, WangXian, WWX & JL, Canon Divergence, Ghost WWX, Hurt/comfort, Family bonding, Fluff, Angst)

Amazing world building through the sun shot campaign - lots of sex heads up: Better Things to Do with a Flute in Wartime by Anonymous (E, 365k, MingXian, WangXianJue, Sunshot Campaign, Fix-It, Magical Healing Cock, Dual Cultivation, mild Dom/Sub, Undernegotiated Kink, Golden Core Reveal, Breathplay, Choking, Painplay, Subdrop, Topdrop, Major Character Injury, Canon Divergence, What-If, Temperature Play, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Fisting, Spanking, PTSD, Trauma, Self-Harm, (in the pursuit of cultivational badassery) )

Have a safe flight! Awaiting Your Return by Karmiya (E, 118k, WangXian, Burial Mounds Settlement Days, the opposite of slow burn, Found Family, Canon Divergence, Age Difference, discussions of wei wuxian’s canonical abusive childhood)

Over the Rotted Bridge by vailkagami (T, 314k, WangXian, Temporary Character Death, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, LWJ dies, Wei Wuxian doesn’t die, neither do (most of) the  wens, JYL also lives, Original Character(s), outside pov, YLLZ WWX,  Canon Divergence, CQL Verse, Illustrated, Grief/Mourning, Non-Consensual  Resurrection, mute LWJ, Hurt LWJ, Slow Burn, canonical death of a child  (mentioned), Survivor Guilt, PTSD)

❤️ The Third Young Master of the Qishan Wen by KouriArashi

T, 139k, wangxian, canon divergence, romance, angst w happy ending, Wen WWX, hurt/comfort, politics, families of choice, revenge, sibling bonding, pining, everyone lives au, Mojo's post)

Ten miles of Lotus Flowers by Yukirin_Snow (M, 273k, wangxian, JC/LXC, ABO, Romance, Slow Burn, Pain, Hurt/Comfort, True Love, Pregnancy, Humor, No one dies that doesn’t deserve to die, Fluff and Smut, Eventual Smut, Angst, Fluff, Eventual Happy Ending)

to pierce your heart; to fill it full by stiricide (E, 210k, wangxian, NHS/Other(s), WQ/Other(s), royalty au, magic, bottom LWJ, angst w happy ending, smut, dark gusu lan sect, implied future LWJ/concubine because heirs, blood & gore, sharing a bed, under-negotiated kink, light bondage, minor character death, slow burn, power imbalance, sexual role play, consensual non-con)

With No Particular Affection  by Chrononautical (E, 92k, WangXian, Modern AU, Arranged Marriage, Kid  Fic, Miscommunication, Family Drama, JFM and YZY’s A+ Parenting, Good Uncle JC, Wedding Fluff, Genius WWX, Street Kid WWX, Homelessness, Rich  LWJ, Oblivious WWX, Cinnamon Roll WN, Implied/Referenced Suicide, WWX Has a Pregnancy Kink, Domestic Fluff, Fluff and Angst)

Mud on Your Feet by AvoOwO (Not rated, 59k, wangxian, JC & WWX, nightmares, sentient burial mounds, possession, panic attacks, night terrors, hurt/comfort, fluff, good sibling JC, hurt WWX, angst w happy ending, blood & injury, hallucinations, insomnia, good sibling WWX, sleepwalking, sleeptalking, protective JC, WWX sees dead people, LWJ pov, PTSD, implied/referenced self-harm, yunmeng siblings feels)

Wei Wuxian Makes a Wish series by natcat5 (M, 119k, wangxian, major character death, underage, madoka magica au, modern w/ magic, time travel, high school au, body horror, self-harm, angst w/ bittersweet ending, time loop, mental instability, suicidal thoughts)

The Scarlet Lotus by rainbowninja167 (M, 137k, WangXian, Marriage of Convenience, Secret Identity, Fix-It, Angst with a Happy Ending, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, Canon-Typical Violence, canon-typical war crimes, Yunmeng Bros, the mortifying ordeal of getting seduced by your own husband, nonlinear chronology we die like cql, just kidding nobody dies in this fic, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, Miscommunication)

Mad about the Boy by TriviasFolly (M, 62k, wangxian, 1950s America au, greaser WWX, historical smoking, historical viewpoints, angst, internal struggle, pre-relationship, homophobia, sexual awakening, sexual experimentation, self-discovery journey, slef-love journey, gay academia, teenage dramatics)

The Fifth Type of Non-Contact Force by Caixx (Not Rated, 83k, WangXian, Modern AU, High School, Slice of Life, Slow Burn, Fluff and Humor, Actually Somewhat Canon, Mutual Pining, Horny Teenagers, Angst with a Happy Ending, Non-Graphic Smut)

I know what my heart wants by yakuso5u (Not Rated, 28k, WangXian, Modern AU, Single Father LWJ, Fluff, Mutual Pining, Getting Together, Accidental Child Acquisition, Domestic, Slice of Life, Christmas references)

In Imitation of Life by travelingneuritis (E, 70k, wangxian, modern cultivation, scifi au, android WWX, tone: neon seedy, rich people are bored and terrible, post-apocalyptoc landscape, happy ending, smut, severe major characger injury, time loss)

A Narrow Bridge by FrameofMind, Jo Lasalle (Jo_Lasalle) (E, 700k, WangXian, Time Travel Fix-It, Canon Divergence, Slow Burn, Getting Together, First Time, Pining while fucking, Burial Mounds Settlement Days, Angst with a Happy Ending, CQL Verse, almost everybody lives/almost nobody dies, epistolary-ish, canon-ish side pairings, radishes) the ultimate fix-everything in my opinion

Twin Demons of Mòby XiaoFeiFei (M, 358k, MXY & WWX, WangXian, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Injury, Abuse, Twin Demons of Mo, MXY Lives, Major Character Injury, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Angst, Minor Character Death, Angst with a Happy Ending, Character Death, Minor Implied/Referenced Incest, Implied/Referenced Torture, Near Death, Near Death Experiences, Canon Divergence, Self-Harm, Found Family, Sexual Abuse, Rape/Non-con Elements, POV Alternating)

🧡 Stunted, Starving Juvenility by TomatenMark (E, 663k, WangXian, WIP, Fix-it of sorts, Talisman master WWX, Not JFM Friendly, Study Arc, Getting together, Fluff and Angst, Engagement)

💖 Magical Marriage Ribbons series by starandrea (M, 1M, wangxian, ongoing, animal transformations, weddings)

WWX relives the story - I cannot for the life of me remember the name of the trope - it’s early for me: we’re starting at the end by Miss_Enthusiasimal (M, 92k, WangXian, JC & WWX, Time Travel, Canon Divergence, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Golden Core Reveal, Burial Mounds, Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Starvation, emaciation, Cannibalism, Self-Harm, Amputation, Suicidal Thoughts, Sunshot Campaign, let JZX and WWX be friends club)  

Madam Yu comes to cloud recesses instead of JFM when WWX punches Zixuan: 🧡 To have and to hold by Moominmammashandbag (M, 78k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Major character injury, CQL verse, Happy Ending)

WQ time travels back to the core removal: 🧡 Never Again by Hauntcats (T, 67k, WangXian, WWX & WQ & WN, Canon Divergence, Time Travel, Golden Core Transfer Fix-It, Angst, Not JC Friendly, BAMF WWX)

Second Summer by Anonymous (M, 152k, wangxian, canon divergence, post-sunshot, mystery, amnesia, memory loss, curses, not everyone dies au, golden core reveal)

Linger by the Door (I’ve Always Been Yours) by piecrust (T, 78k, wangxian, canon compliant, slow burn)

actually super fuffy and funny despite tags: Like a Water-Worn Stone by meyari (T, 41k, wangxian, major character death, hurt/comfort, cchronic illness, serious injuries, self-medication, disability, PTSD, depression, self-worth issues, implied/referenced child abuse, aftermath of war, aftermath of violence, prisoner of war, idenity issues, warning: JGS, discussion of enslavement, discussion of abuse)

LWJ saves WWX from falling at nightless city: Unbreakable Heaven, Luminous Earth by carolyncaves (M, 96k, wangxian, graphic depictions of violence, canon divergence, secret identity, sharing a bed, literal sleeping together, pining, getting together, suicidal thoughts, bloog & injury, caretaking, sexual content, fluff, angst w happy ending, power imbalance, JYL lives, not everyone dies au)

🧡 Song of Suibian and Bichen: Or, the Greatest (And Only) Furby Master of Demonic Cultivation by moonwaif (T, 64k, WangXian, Fix-It of Sorts, canon adjacent, The spiritual weapons are furbies, Angst with a Happy Ending, The parent trap but make it WangXian with furbies, Mutual Pining, Taking my favorite parts of every adaptation and smashing them together)

🧡 All will be well when the day is done by abCEE (T, 76k, wangxian, time travel, canon divergence, fix it, not YZY friendly, not Jiang friendly, butterfly effect, no sunshot, madam lan lives, lan WWX)

🧡 like speaking to my heart by SnowshadowAO3 (T, 613k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Daemons, Slow Burn, Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Canonical Character Death, Some people live!, additional warnings in specific chapters, if you don’t know what daemons are that’s ok because I explain it in the author’s note, also by slow burn I VERY much mean slow burn)

The Same Moon Shines series by sami (Various, 799k, check individual tags from the works!)

Crossover between MDZS and Scum Villain, where Jiang Cheng and Liu Qingge meet, pretend to date, get married, and eventually fall in love. You don't even need to know that much about SVSSS, is so beautiful written that you can just read it: What married people do by Shamelesscooper (E, 216k, JC/LQG, crossover, SVSSS, marriage of convenience, slow burn, pining, demisexual JC, sharing a bed, masturbation, jealousy, slow burn WWX & JC reconciliation, chapter-specific tags in the notes, bathing/washing, enthusiastic consent, relationship negotiaitions)

Nearly 400,000 words, WIP gorgeous AU transmigration: The Tamed by Escheria (T, 366k, wangxian, LWJ/XZ, WWX/WYB, RPF, YLLZ WWX, combination of MDZS & Untamed, OP WWX, XZ is WWX, transmigration, isekai, WIP)

Many happy returns. by orange_crushed (E, 25k, WangXian, Modern AU, Mistaken Identity, Misunderstandings, Grief/Mourning, Loss of Parent(s), Implied/Referenced Suicide, Past Suicide of a Parent, References to Depression, Anxiety, Therapy, References to Anti-Depressant Medications, Escort Service, Loneliness, Everybody’s Abandonment Issues, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, Domestic Fluff, Moving In Together, Oral Sex, Penetrative Sex, Hopeful Ending, Recovery, References to Escorting/Sex Work but No Actual Escorting/Sex Work)

live from new york by varnes (E, 87k, wangxian, JYL/JZX, This is a SNL AU, however the juniors are featured and there are lots of shenanigans!, slow burn, friends to lovers, pining, getting together, happy ending)

I know what my heart wants by yakuso5u (Not Rated, 28k, WangXian, Modern AU, Single Father LWJ, Fluff, Mutual Pining, Getting Together, Accidental Child Acquisition, Domestic, Slice of Life, Christmas references)

Cure by Yukirin_Snow (M, 100k, WangXian, XiCheng, XuanLi, Modern AU, Hurt/Comfort, Sick Character, Cancer, Medical Procedures, Medical Jargon, Romance, Eventual Smut, Fluff and Angst, Love at First Sight, possible trigger warnings) i’ll keep reccing this time and time again until more ppl see how good this fic is!!!!!

[ringotheman]

Ways To Find Art Fight Targets

GET HYPE FOR ARTFIGHT WOOOOOO a little guide for first year fighters that might be useful for anyone struggling to find people. not listed in a particular order.

Friends & Follows grab your friends' profiles and your friend's friends, and then check out the people you follow on other socials and see if they've linked their profile somewhere.

"Recent Characters" and "Browse Characters" an ever-flowing fountain of recently posted ocs for you to spend however long you'd like going through, right on the home page. I treat it like Spotify discover weekly and go through people's profiles n all that too. click anything that grabs your attention, bookmark like crazy.

Tag Search artfight>browse>tagsearch is perfect if you have a particular kind of character you want to draw, like characters from fandoms, AUs, or specific aesthetics. can even use multiple tags, if you're feeling really specific.

Artfight Discord Link here: https://discord.gg/artfight has a BUNCH of resources to find targets and just overall navigate the fight. Namely in the #target-hunting channel. similar to the recent characters tab, its a huge, constantly rotating channel to post your link. it has a two hour cooldown, so feel free to scroll targets in the meantime. 4b. The Newbie List not sure if there will be an offical one for 2024, but last year there was a big spreadsheet for people who were 1st year fighters OR had very low defenses relative to their attacks. complete with links, teams, and character types. if there's one for 2024, it'll probably be pinned in #target-finding

Hitlists Hitlists are essentially separate lists from your bookmarks for people you want to keep an eye on. Mostly, I've seen them in Google forms, but I've also seen them in reblogs and comment threads. it's 90% just to get on people's radars and the other 10% is telling them your preferences, style, team and how seriously you're taking the fight. at minimum, they include a profile link and team affiliation. Most of them will also include openness mass attacks/friendly fire/revenge chains, kinds of OCs, character preferences, etc. Create your own, link it everywhere, and fill out other peoples.

Scavenging the web most socials have a tag system nowadays, or at *least* a search function. if you look for the opposing team name or the current year's tag (ex: #artfight 2024 , #team stardust) you WILL find someone. congrats! now you have people to murder. lemme know if i missed anything <3

[amphibifish]

idk if someone already gave you it but consider it done gimmie your heimdall maloki thoughts for the send a character thing

~Pen

HI PEN thank u 4 sending heimdall maloki ^_^

first impression: he was instantly my fave because in the anime his lines were just so so stereotypically edgy i could not take him seriously it was so funny to me. it was also a little jarring because he acts so so different from my impression of myth heimdallr

current impression: he's silly and he gets a lot of shit from the narrative which i don't really think he deserves considering everything that's happened to him. anime heimdall does find peace at least but he quite literally had to go to hel and back. manga heimdall im not sure exactly how he is at the very end of the series but he's way more fucked up and never really backs down on his ambitions. either way he gets fucked up real bad

fave moment: it's hard to discern a very favorite moment cause there's a lot i find silly or interesting. but one from anime and manga each are (major spoilers in small text)

-> (anime) rejecting lokis hand when the bridge breaks beneath him. it shows how he prefers lokis betrayal over odin's (odin is his father in the mythos so i'm gonna say it applies here too) and how it's less about him losing the eye and more about who did it. that factor changes in the manga because it's def more about who took away what his life was there but yeah. that whole scene honestly just makes me so sad because he goes on about how seeking revenge on loki is the only reason he exists and idk. love that guy.

-> him beating the shit out of loki to figure out if it's actually loki. i just think it's funny how he knows loki well from how he reacts to getting in a physical fight with him

story idea: idk tbh. never had any overarching plots for fics but id like to write something concerning him and narugami's (thor) relationship sometime from the manga since naru clearly still cares about his brother despite a lot of the things he's done. that scene where he calls heimdall "heim(u)" and loki questions naru about nicknaming the guy trying to kill him (as in loki) is funny to me lmao

unpopular opinion: heimdall was a little justified in his whole thing. like in context they are gods and loki basically ripped away and uprooted heimdalls whole life, even if he was simply following orders, so revenge in death makes sense for divine wrath. is his anger a little misdirected ? yeah but like can you really blame the guy he can't blame **** out of past emotional connection and trust. also he was just following orders too it's his job !!!!! the only one he has left since he got fired after loki ripped his eye out !!!!!

fave relationship: hard choice between freyr and loki. loki and heim's relationship is very complicated because loki obviously cares about heim and sees how his anger is eating away at him and heim you know. hates loki with all his being. i think that moment when heim gets possessed by baldr and is drifting in and out of being possessed going on about how he's supposed to be the one to kill loki while loki tells mayura that heimdall is a friend and that helping him is something that only he can do shows that well. freyr and heim is classic odd couple duo that's silly so that's why i love them but also because freyr really is heimdalls only friend that actively cares for him. he searches for him when he goes missing twice in the manga and also is the only one that mourns him. so i just think they're neat.

fave headcanon: heimdall got his talons from shapeshifting. i got it from a fic and it's neat to me so yeah ^_^ it also makes his relationship with loki angstier if you imagine that loki was his shapeshifting buddy. while i don't think they were really good friends or lovers as i've seen others suggest before loki betrayed him i do think their rivalry was much more friendly and out of respect for one another's talents before evolving into an arch-nemesis relationship.

[harfanfare]

When your Prince Charming arrives || First Years x Reader

What if someone from RSA seemed to be your dreamed lover?

Ace Trappola

It isn’t easy to make Ace seriously worried, about something that wasn’t caused by his friends, wanting to get revenge on his poor—as they defined them—jokes.

From the first sight he knew, that a boy, who “accidentally” bumped into you, was a danger. Some kind of.

He seemed just… too perfect: tall, muscular, with beautiful hair and natural charm, charisma. His clothes complemented the colour of dark as cosmos eyes, and his manners were impeccable. Ace started doubting that even Vil Schoenheit himself could point out anything to him, but he wouldn’t bet on his arm.

With each trait, something was pushing Ace away from the boy more and more.

If he hasn't paid much attention to him, then you definitely did. By the time the day was over, you managed to tell him ten times how he helped you get up—"You fell because of him," Ace replied while rolling his eyes—and characterized the boy verbally, so that no teacher would complain about not enough words on your opinion essay.

“Agh, enough-!” Ace got upset when, even while playing cards, you didn't talk about anyone else but that handsome hero who helped you get up faster than Ace did. He got up from the floor. “Marvel at him in his face! He will certainly want to hear all these compliments in person.”

He stormed out of the room before you could stop him.

His arms were shaking once he got out of the dorm, to the Rose Maze. He emanated with anger and grief; he swore to himself, that he will kick this guy from RSA the time he sees him. Though he wasn't sure... would you be mad at him...?

“Wait, Ace!” you had to run as fast as you could to catch up with the boy and bump hard into him. You hugged his waist tight, worried that he would run away as soon as you loosened your grip. “Sorry. I really didn't mean to upset you.”

Ace turned around to see your eyes. The corners of his mouth quivered before twitched into a weak smile.

"It's alright," he said, but his voice slowly cracking. “The better one wins, right?”

"Of course," you tightened your embrace so that your cheek was pressed tightly against Ace's body. “I won't be with any guy who can't destroy a chandelier with friends.”

The boy took a deep breath before finally wrapping his arms around you.

The warmth he felt from you and the one inside him caused a strange feeling in his stomach and chest. He didn't know exactly what he felt, but he didn't mind at all.

“Out of my advantages, you chose this particular one?” He said, his face showing a mischievous, a bit mocking, but still friendly smile. "I guess it was at the top of such a long list as ‘Advantages of Ace’"

‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎‏‏‎ ‎

Deuce Spade

Deuce didn’t know what feeling was responsible for twisting his stomach, once he saw you and a boy from RSA, introducing him to some NRC classes.

Does his dark, rebellious side finally want to see the light of day?

Not as much as he wanted to hit that boy, he’d rather preferred to take you somewhere far away from him. From everybody.

“Someone's jealous!” Ace laughed when Deuce told him about his worries.

“Again, why did I come to you with this...?” The dark-haired man sighed, placing his hand on his hair and tightening it tightly. "You really think I'm, uh, jealous?"

“And not?” Ace tucked his hair back, laced the fingers of his hands together, and blinked several times. “Oh! My hero!” He said in a squeaky voice. “I will have to give up my lovely Deuce for you because you helped me up. A~aah!”

Deuce snorted and slapped Ace on the forehead. He fell onto the bed. The redhead burst out laughing as he looked at the nervous, sulking Deuce.

“Go Deuce,” he said, sitting down on the bed, still with an amused sparkles in his eyes. “Fight!”

Without waiting for any further words of encouragement, Deuce ran out of the room, towards the school. He went through all important, busier spots in the school before he found you in the cafeteria.

Of course, with that RSA guy.

He felt his body tighten like a tight string as you spotted him between the heads of the other students and waved at him.

"This is Deuce, my boyfriend," you introduced the boy to your dinner companion, and the dark-haired man looked away. So what if you guys were dating for months? The title "boyfriend" always made his heart run wild. “And this is [Boy's Name], a student from RSA.”

"Nice to meet you." Deuce reached out his hand and squeezed the boy's hand. He did it with such force that you could almost hear the crunch of bones and a soft gasp as the student jerked his hand away. “Now, I'm so sorry, but I have to take [Name] with me.”

He felt a twinge of guilt as you walked away, and the RSA boy was massaging his hand. However, now-not-yours prince charming will definitely go to the nurse, and on the way, he will surely run into one of the most beautiful students in NRC. It’s always like that in fairy tales.

You have to fight for your true love, right? They both have to find and keep the love of their lives.

��‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎

Epel Felmier

Just give him a chance, and he'll definitely try to kick that fop in the knee so hard he won't get up again.

"Fight fire with fire," Vil advised him during their usual dinner at Pomefiore. Even though Epel had said nothing about his worries, Vil could still sense a depressive aura from him that was definitely ‘not beautiful’.

The Pomefiore leader was also not very happy with the arrival of some students from the RSA. But until they were more beautiful than he was—not that anyone like that existed—their presence did not irritate them that much.

Of course, you didn't forget about Epel—you felt so drawn to your new acquaintance's aura that you sometimes lost track of time, but you make sure not to skip your meetings.

He felt like a pawn in a game of chess, not a player. He was attractively dressed, and now standing next to that RSA boy who had attracted your attention all too often. He took you with him a lot, that one day he almost offered to take you with him to the RSA. It would only require some paperwork, wouldn't it?

“[Name]” Epel turned to you, his voice trembling with anxiety and anger. He took a deep breath but didn't feel any cooling down. “The final decision will always be yours. But I want to say something about it here.” He pointed at the visitor and glared at him.

He felt a sudden need to straighten his hair and his clothes as silence fell around him. All the witnesses waited for his next move, and even though no one was saying anything, he felt like he was the new hot topic of gossips.

He went over to you and locked you in a hug as if he didn't want to watch all those onlookers.

"I know you may not believe me, but I really am not sure if he can bring you the happiness you expect," he blushed here. “I-I mean… I don't know if I can offer you a life only filled with happiness you want, but… I will try… So, uh, please don't go with him…!”

“Huh? There's no way I'm going with him,” you said, tearing away from him. "I'm addicted to apples and a certain apple boy, and I won't survive without this combination."

Epel breathed a sigh of relief, feeling his cheeks flush with shame, and memories of words that even sounded too serious for him.

Even though he felt terrible in this elegant garment, he couldn't think of it as his feelings exploded in his body.

Ah, yes. He couldn't want to love anyone else that much.

‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎

Jack Howl

Jack never wanted to stop at anything other than "true love".

When you two started dating, he saw no other way than planning his future with you... But this RSA guy was never included in your plans.

"He's joining us," you told your new friend, pointing at Jack. He had his arms crossed and he was at least a head taller than the boy, so the boy had to raise his chin to see Jack's ears. “He offered to help us with cleaning.”

"Ah, yes," [Boy's Name] cleared his throat, trying to remain indifferent. He felt overwhelmed by Jack's presence and Jack made no effort to make it easier for him. Because what was he supposed to do? Squat down so that he doesn't feel trapped like surrounded by tall rocks? "We'll definitely need someone strong."

Everything went very agile and neat.

Even if you and the RSA student previously thought it would take a long, long time, in half an hour you managed to do more than you were allotted to. Maybe it's because your loved one didn't allow too long conversations between you and [Boy's Name]?

It would certainly have been hours if the two of you were left for each other. Ideally, a lot of time to make another appointment, exchange phone numbers, cancel your joint vacation plans with Jack and change your school, right?

“Thank you for your hard work” you put the broom in the storage box. Cleaning with magic was definitely simpler and easier, but as long as you can clean, magic can feel a little sloppy while comparing the cleanliness of rooms.

"Thank you for your hard work," [Boy's Name] replied, dusting his hands of the fluff. "Maybe... you'd like to go together, just the two of us," he stressed the last words, "to the cafe?”

"I'm sorry," you smiled apologetically. You looked at Jack who was just coming back and started walking towards him with a smile on your face. “You may not see it, but this one needs a daily dose of hugs because later he will be very sad.”

Jack silently denied as he turned his head to the side out of intimidation as you hugged him tightly.

… For moments like this, the existence of people like [Boy's Name] is needed.

‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎

Sebek Zigvolt

“We need your assistance, [Name]” just after taking the left corridor, Sebek appeared in front of you and a student from RSA. The green-haired man had a stoic expression and his hands were behind his back, what made him seem much more composed than he thought himself. There was so much going on in his head that it would be easier to talk about what he wasn't thinking about. “It's urgent.”

Without further ado, he grabbed your wrist, knocking the RSA student's hand off your shoulder. He gave him a frightening look before he turned on his heels and you and you walked far, far away from this place.

"Hey, Sebek," you broke the silence that had been with you since you stepped out into the uncrowded corridor. “Something happened?”

“What do you mean?” He replied in a gruff voice and picked up the pace.

"For example," you panted, trying to keep up with him, "you're almost crushing my hand."

As if on cue, Sebek immediately let you go, doing it as quickly as if he had touched hot coal. With a surprised look, he glanced at your wrist, which turned slightly red from his tight grip.

"Ah, uh, forgive me," he muttered, rubbing his temple. "I still feel sick to see that human from the Royal Sword Academy."

“You mean [Boy’s Name]?” you asked, and Sebek made a face at his name. For him, this boy will always be "human" in the worst tone and sense of the word. "Some have described him as ‘so sweet that he is so bland’”

“It suits him.”

“You don't like him too? Too cute by Diasomnia standards?” you guessed jokingly. “Or were you jealous, hehe?”

“T-that's not the point!” He growled, feeling his face flush red. You looked at him in shock, now sure, you guessed it, and Sebek felt even more exposed by it. "It's just that this human looked at you so... so strange! I didn’t not like this.”

"There is a way," you said, smiling frivolously at him. “You can invite me to tea and vice versa, and then we will not see him anymore.”

[rachelbethhines]

Tangled Salt Marathon - Once A Handmaiden (First Half)

Here it is. The time has finally come. Ladies, Gentlemen, and Enbies, I present to you the worst episode of Tangled the Series and the entire reason for the salt marathon.

Summary: Eugene and Varian create a new weapon they call "Project Obsidian", a bazooka that shoots weaponized amber crystals to combat an impending attack from Cassandra, which Rapunzel reluctantly authorizes as a last resort. Meanwhile, Cassandra discovers the missing shard from the mirror and realizes the Enchanted Girl's manipulation, who she finally discovers to be Zhan Tiri. She disguises herself in a magic cloak and takes the form of a handmaiden named Faith in an effort to make amends with Rapunzel. Only for plans to awry when Zhan Tiri interferes.

So Much For Trauma

It’s hard to convey in screen shots alone, but the tone for this scene is all wrong.

Like I do believe that Varian would build an amber gun to stop Cassandra and the rocks, but having him be so comfortable with it as to whoop and holler with glee as he practices firing it feels off. This is the stuff that traumatized him and ruined his life for years and he’s planning on using it against a former friend that recently abused him mercilessly while also threating his home and friends. Just because he ‘faced his fears’ in Be Very Afraid doesn’t mean that truama is suddenly gone forever.

And not only does making light of this choice diminish Varian’s own development, but it’s used to reduce the credibility of the threat Cassandra presents.

Eugene is even closer to Cass than Varian, and here he is planning on using a deadly weapon against her by building childish wooden targets that mock her. As if this was just an offshoot of his long held friendly rivalry with her and not a life or death situation.

The audience can’t take the interpersonal conflicts of the main characters seriously if the show refuses to present the external conflicts surrounding them with gravitas.

So Which Is It? Does He Want To Destroy Her Or Not?

So here he is outright stating that the amber gun is meant to destroy Cass, only to turn around and feed us this line two seconds later.

Look, I honestly don’t care which it is. Varian has more than enough reasons for wanting to take Cass down, but I also understand that post redemption Varian isn’t big on revenge. Either way though, I expect some internal consistency.

I also expect some from Eugene as well. If he knows that the device can potentially kill Cassandra, whom he views as ‘a sister’ (his own words, not mine) then wouldn’t he be taking this more seriously? Wouldn’t he be more reluctant to use such a weapon?

Either the writers don’t know what the fuck they are doing, or Eugene and Varian are lying out of their asses to Rapunzel right now. Given the characters’ behavior later in the episode, I suspect it’s the former.

Rapunzel Is Full Of Shit, As Usual

I mean is this is precisely what Rapunzel was trying to push Eugene into doing just last episode, so she’s being hypocritical by suddenly disapproving it. Also, even as just a prince consort Eugene would still have this responsibility so the ‘captain’ stuff doesn’t even matter here. The point is, Rapunzel is sitting on her ass while other people do her job for her, and then has the gall to act offended when they don’t go along with her bullshit.

Geez, she really is Frederic’s daughter.

Just Because Rapunzel Says Something, Doesn’t Make It True

The ‘Cass you love’ is a bulling asshole who publicly threatened to destroy your kingdom, kidnapped and abused a minor, assaulted and stole from an innocent old man, attempted to murder no less than three people three separate times, including yourself, and used a powerful stolen object to brainwash four people into being her personal soldiers.

The series acts like Rapunzel is in the wrong for taking this small preventive measure to defend herself and others, to the point that it backfires later in the episode, and goes on to insist that she was right all along to trust Cass, even as Cass is actually the one responsible for making shit worse.

It baffles me that grown ass adults wrote this trash.

The series really went and said, “Being responsible is bad. Coddling violent abusers is good so long as you ‘love’ them.” Then expects us, the audience, to agree to this tripe all cause it’s the protagonist supporting such BS.

What Are You Doing Cass?

Just out leisurely taking a stroll for no reason. Not a care in the world.

Yeah she soooo oppressed show; such a sad poor woobie right there.

This is quite literally the best idea you could come up with to get your plot rolling writers? The main villain just doing fucking nothing?

I mean she went to all that trouble to steal the mind trap three episodes ago, but screw that! Talking a walk is more important!

Heck if you wanted to keep her looking innocent, despite all the wrongs she committed, you could have shown her being hunted down here. It’d be manipulative and biased story telling for sure, but it would have furthered your narrative better than whatever the hell this is.

This Just In: Dumb Plot Point Is Dumb; More News At Eleven

I’ve talked about this extensively in my Tale of Two Sisters review so let me just briefly highlight why this plot point is so stupid one more time.  

Zhan Tiri’s whole scheme involving Cass finding the mirror and getting mad at Rapunzel for it was convoluted as fuck and should not have logically worked.

One good memory does not erase years of abuse and having even this one sole happy moment be fake undermines Cassandra’s motivation and agency.

This scene flanderizes Gothel in a way that proves to be very sexist; especially when taken in context with the rest of the series.

Zhan Tiri could have better hidden the shard to begin with. Her not doing so undermines all of the pervious hard work she put into tricking Cass in the first place. Which in turn weakens Zhan Tiri as a believable threat.

Why does Cass connect Zhan Tiri to the mirror at all and subsequently get mad at her, given that Zhan Tiri wasn’t around when she found neither the mirror nor the shard?

I’ve never seen such bad plotting in a show before. I legitimately struggle to think of anything I’ve watched that reaches this level of shite and I’m not exactly a connoisseur of high art or anything. I’ll gladly defend even the likes of Loonatics Unleashed over this.

The Big Bad, Everyone

Seriously, is this the best you can do show?

Tangled the Series lost viewers hand over fist because it had a meandering plot. Now we’re one episode away from the series finale and both of the main villains are shown not doing shit.

That’s A Lot Of Assumptions Cass

Yes, she’s right, but only because the writers are feeding the words into her mouth.

There’s nothing to show the audience how Cassandra came to this conclusion. Yes, this should shatter her illusions of Gothel, but what does that have to do with Zhan Tiri? She never claimed that Gothel loved Cass. In fact she showed Gothel abandoning her. All she said was that Rapunzel was a shit person.

At this point Cassandra should be questioning things, sure, but suspecting Zhan Tiri now when she previously hadn’t before doesn’t make sense.

Also no one tricked you, Cass. You abandoned Rapunzel ages ago for your own reasons, or are we conventionally ignoring your song and dance routine during Rapunzel’s Return.

What The Fuck Is Your Plan Here Zhan Tiri?

She acts she always meant for Cass to find the shard, but why? What does the mirror and the shard gain her? How does losing Cassandra's blind trust help her?

Why Did You Only Think To Ask This Question Now?

It’s the Goodwill Festival again today, which means we are a year and half away from Rapunzel's Return. Cassandra met Zhan Tiri before even that, way back during Rapunzeltopia. No matter how you slice it, regardless of your thoughts on the timeline debate, it’s been well over a year since Cassandra started listening to the little gumdrop's advice, and she’s only now asking this very basic question?

This is why I have so little respect for the show. It had to dumb down one of it’s female leads into an unthinking moron in order to get it’s plot going.

So Does Zhan Tiri Have Any Powers Or Not Show?

Cassandra touches Zhan Tiri and gets this creepy vision, but why? If Zhan Tiri has any real powers in this form, she never uses them. All she ever does is steal other people’s tricks and make empty speeches. Even later flashbacks showing her past proves that she was originally just a human being same as anyone else.

Amazing! Every Single Line Spoken Here Is Bad!

Yeah, cause you’re not scary at all.

Name one single thing you actually have in common then Zhan Tiri. Just One.

You’re a thousand year old demon who wants to destroy your ex-boyfriend's hometown and she’s a twenty five year old woman who’s brain has being stolen by the plot.

What destiny?! There’s is no destiny! If you want Cassandra to believe that there is one then at least have the smarts to make one up!!

How- I - What???? What the fuck does that even mean? Cassandra and Rapunzel aren’t even sisters to begin with and you sure as hell don’t come any closer. What kind of logic is this? What do you hope to gain here, Zhan Tiri? Is Cass even looking for a sister?

No you don’t. You want to destroy Corona and Cassandra doesn’t even know what she wants. And you’re too much of a waste of a villain, Zhan Tiri, to even suggest to her a real goal so that you could potentially manipulate her with it.

Get what? Help her with what? No one can take Zhan Tiri’s weakass ‘manipulations’ seriously if the writers won’t let her tempt Cassandra with anything concrete.

FOR THE LAST FUCKING TIME; ‘DESINTY’ IS NOT A GOAL

Of course not Cass. What makes you a bad person is all the kidnapping, drugging, physical assaults, attempted murders, thefts, and brainwashing.

Does Cassandra just not remember doing all that shit? Is that the lame excuse the writers are trying to pull here?

You can not have a character commit such acts of violence without a justifiable cause and then expect the audience to feel sorry for them later just because they make sad eyes at the camera. You just can’t. And no, a vague ‘destiny’ does not fucking cut it.

It’s insulting that the crew thought that they could get away with such horse shit and yet here we are.

Zhan Tiri Is Right

The show, and certain Cass fans, try to blame Zhan Tiri for Moonsandra’s actions but, as we’ve proven throughout the salt marathon, Cassandra was acting of her own accord. Zhan Tiri didn’t make her do anything. So yes, she is a bad person because she committed horrible deeds for totally selfish and self-centered reasons.  

Who The Fuck Is She Then?

This isn’t deep or clever show.

You spent a season and a half striping away anything that made Cassandra an interesting character, twisting her to fit your plot for contrived reasons, and you have the gall to throw in this lame existential crisis at the last fucking moment in a last ditch effort to meta your way out of your bad writing.

Here It Is; The Worst Line In The Whole Show!

You are a fully grown 25 year old woman who was trained to be a royal guard! What the FUCK do you mean ‘Am I the bad guy’?  

I wanted to throw things at my tv screen upon first hearing this line.

And contrary to popular belief, I am not one to usually throw things at inanimate objects. Especially over something as pointless as a cartoon show.

Listen, life is too short to waste time on shit, and my ADHD is so bad that I don’t even finish half the series that I actually do enjoy. But this stupid fucking line unlocked a rage within me that I did not even knew existed.

I have never, in all my 32 years been so offended by something on tv. I have sat through bad endings, forced romances, poor characterization, character assignations, plot holes galore, bad morals, bad dialogue, and every offensive stereotype imaginable, but this is what finally broke me.  

I get it now. I understand Supernatural fans. I empathize with you Game of Thrones watchers. I now know where you’re coming from Once Upon a Time viewers, who continued on even as the seasons got worse and worse, long after I had jumped ship.

The shows betrayed you. They tricked you into thinking they were good, got you invested in the characters, and then they punched you in the face repeatedly with contemptable writing. ‘But it was once good, maybe it’ll get better?’, you tell yourself, but it doesn’t.

For a full two seasons I honestly believed that there was going to be a payoff for everything; a comeuppance for Rapunzel, an explanation for Cassandra’s actions, Eugene re-gaining a backbone, a tying up of all the plot holes, maybe even a satisfying end for Varian’s story, but nope!

This line cemented that the writers did not care. They had never cared. There was no plan. I had just wasted my time and my emotional investment. And it did so in the most sexist way possible, by stealing agency and logical thought away from a leading female character in order to force their inane plot.

More Broken Narrative Promises

I don’t know Cass, what are you doing? That’s what we’ve all been asking for two seasons now.

I notice that you conveniently forgot your dad there. Whom you last saw buried under a pile of rubble.

Then she never does.

The other issue with Cassandra’s arc, beyond just the lack of a clear goal and muddle motivations, is the pacing. Her time as a villain is dragged out far too long and her redemption, what little we get of it, is far too rushed as a result. We never actually see Cassandra putting forth the effort to actually change, and by the episode’s end she’s back to being a villain for very little reason. Telling me that she’s not really learned anything and that her remorse here is not genuine.

Can We Stop Comparing Cassandra To Gothel With Lazy Callbacks?  

We get it. She’s Gothel’s daughter. Shorty’s one line in the movie was him making a creepy pass at Gothel. That does not mean the audience will find him flirting with Cassandra funny as well.

Context matters. Shorty was funny in the movie because Gothel didn’t put up with his shit. Cass hearing this line while in the middle of an emotional breakdown doesn’t respond in the same way as her mother would. So the scene just sits there uncomfortably with no punch line to finish the joke.

Oh No, Feel Sorry For The Poor Baby Who Now Has To Suffer The Consequences Of Her Actions

What makes me really angry is that they avoided showing Varian’s mistreatment for two seasons, but will take the time to frame Cass getting her bullshit handed back to her as if she was merely the victim of a misunderstanding.

Bitch publicly threatened to destroy the kingdom and attempted to murder their princess multiple times. What the heck did she think was going to happen? That citizens would throw her a parade for it?

Hi Owl

Now there’s an understatement.

Owl exists for the same reason Ruddiger and Pascal exists. To be someone for the main character to monologue to when alone in a scene. It’s a fairly old practice that dates all the way back to Snow White and the Seven Dwarves.  I can’t fault the writers for utilizing the same trick here.

What I can fault them for is failing to make Owl much of character until this point. Pascal, Max, Ruddiger, Hamuel, even Axel all might be simple characters but they at least have some sort of personality. Owl just, exists, and that’s it.

Even his name is unoriginal. You’ve any idea how many fucking characters that are named Owl? Disney alone has at least five; Friend Owl, The Old Wise Owl, Professor Owl, Owl from Winnie the Pooh, apparently The Nutcracker and the Four Realms also has a character named Owl; not to mention all the background owls that aren’t given a name. The list just goes on and on...

Faith Deserved Better

In one simple scene the creators made Faith more relatable and sympathetic than they’ve managed to do with Cassandra in three seasons. Yet we don’t even get her name until this episode. After which she just runs off to who knows where and we don’t see her until the final group shot during the finale. It’s a waste of a character.

I hope she ran off, found Vex, and they had a better much better adventure than the one we’re forced to watch.

This Plan Wasn’t Very Thought Out

What does Cass plan on doing if the real Faith shows up? What then?

The fact that we don’t see Faith again until the last shot of the finale is a lazy plot convenience not some well crafted masterplan.

Yes, Let’s Just Remind The Audience That Cass May Have Murdered An Innocent Old Man During Her ‘Redemption’ Episode

Yeah, yeah, The Keeper appears in the finale and this isn’t Cassandra’s actual redemption episode.

The point is that the writers are trying to convince the first time viewing audience that Cassandra is legitimately trying to turn over a new leaf, but said first time viewers still wouldn’t know what happened to The Keeper at this point.

Therefore, they just undermined their own narrative by bringing up the fact that Cassandra may have assaulted and stolen from some old man that had nothing to do with her petty bitch fight with Rapunzel.

They’ve also now planted the seed to suggest that Cass did something to Faith to keep her out of the way since we don’t see Faith until the finale same as The Keeper. Otherwise, Cassandra winds up looking stupid as pointed out above.

It’s especially damaging that she shows no remorse for it such actions either; just salty that someone called out her bullshit.

Oh This Is Dumb

Let me count the ways in which this is stupid.  

If Cassandra wanted to not be viewed as a monster, then maybe she shouldn’t have tried to murder people with zero provocation. Just saying; this isn’t some gross misinterpretation of her, it’s the direct consequences of her own actions.

The series is trying to frame this advertisement for the play as more Rapunzel boot-licking propaganda; but it never holds Rapunzel accountable for all the undeserved hero worship she receives so it’s message, if it even has one, is utterly lost.

Did Rapunzel approve of this play? It would seem so, but why? She’s Cassandra’ biggest supporter so why would she actively undermine her attempts at reconciliation by publicly condoning an unfavorable portrayal of her best friend?

Cassandra doesn’t actually do anything to prove she’s not evil anymore. In fact she doesn’t even try. So this is yet again another failed narrative promise.

This Is Manipulative

So right now, in the USA, we have an asshole of a Senator who is publicly trying to walk back upon his agreed promise to vote for a very important bill and is using the media to gaslight people into thinking that it’s the bill’s supporters who are withholding progress from the people.

This is that but in cartoon form.

An agreement was made to protect the people of a nation by that nations rulers, and now one of those rulers is using their status and platform to peer pressure everyone into going against their best interests in order to further their own personal agendas.

Just because Rapunzel isn’t taking bribes like Manchin doesn’t make her any less evil. She’s still placing what she wants over the needs of her people.

Furthermore, putting a person on the spot like that in public is a classic bullying tactic. It’s like that asshole who was dumped making a public proposal in the hopes that the girl will be too embarrassed to say no. Rapunzel is using peer pressure to coerce her dad into doing what she wants.

The show literally said, “Let’s just turn the main character into their abusive parent. Yup, that’s positive development right there.”

Also, there’s Arianna being her enabling self till the very end. Fuck Chris for doing this to her. What a waste.

It’s Really Gross That Rapunzel Only Cares About ‘Faith’ Once She Starts Being Useful To Her

Just earlier this season Rapunzel was calling poor Faith ‘a dud’ because she didn’t willingly go along with every stupid thing Rapunzel wanted to do. Now she suddenly shows an interest in being her friend, just because she supports what Rapunzel wants.

What kind of message is that to send to kids? You’re only worth having around if your useful? No one ‘cool’ will be your friend unless your a sheep? It’s okay to be selfish if your rich, powerful, and pretty?

And it’s not this one instance that feels off either. This has been a recurring problem with Rapunzel characterization since season one.

Just because it’s ‘Rapunzel’s show’, doesn’t mean she’s the center of the universe nor that she should get a free pass for being an awful person. If your main character is just handed everything they want on a silver platter with zero consequences and no effort on their part then you have a bad story. Period.

This Is Empty

Cassandra makes this grand speech about choices and agency, and fighting back against impossible odds, but it holds no meaning because Cassandra always had control.

Cassandra chose to steal the moonstone. Cassandra chose to be a violent asshole. Cassandra chose to stay by Rapunzel’s side when she didn’t have too. Cassandra chose to turn down other opportunities. Cassandra chose to leave and chose to come back instead of finding other avenues. Cassandra chose to listen to Zhan Tiri.

Cassandra is not in any way shape or form a victim of circumstance. She’s not like Caine, Varian, the real Faith, or even Andrew and the Saporians. She’s not actually fighting against anything, and it’s really insulting that the series keeps trying to frame her selfishness as something to be pitied.

If Cass Really Cared She’d Give Up The Mind Trap

Not only is this an incredibly stupid plan, but it’s one that allows Cassandra to weasel out of any real effort or accountability on her part. Hence, why she comes up with it.

If you truly want to make amends for something, then you start by trying to mend the damage that you’ve done. Cass isn’t actually sorry for hurting others. If she was then she would simply stop hurting others. She’d give back what she stole and release the people under her mind control.

And you can’t claim that Cassandra forgot about manipulating the Brotherhood because she uses the mind trap at the end of the episode. As soon as she has to face any consequences for her actions she falls back on being the absolute worst out of spite. She’s learned nothing and all she proves during this episode is that she cares more about her image than actual human lives.

Shorty Should Have Been Demanitus

I said it before and I’ll say it again, not connecting Shorty to the lore and main plot of the series was a real missed opportunity.

I mean this framing just screams; ‘manipulative old guy with dubious ethics’. It would also explain his deus ex machina powers and how he keeps popping up everywhere.

But nope, this is just Shorty being weird for the sake of comedy and nothing else.

Vardaros Doesn’t Matter

We spent four episodes in that stupid town and for what? A throwaway line in a comedy routine, that’s what.

Also, are you sure about that Eugene? Cause quite frankly Rapunzel is no prize herself.

Behold, An Actual Payoff!

And It Doesn’t Fucking Matter At All!

We waste like five minutes on this stupid gopher grab subplot, and it adds nothing to the narrative. Worse, we also squandered two whole episodes in two pervious seasons building up to what amounts to nothing more than a weak comedic runaround.

This is why Monty was created? This is why we spent extra time in Vardaros instead of moving on with the plot? This is what we fucked up the timeline for?

This?

The Show Has A Very Shallow View of Friendship

So they trip over each other and have a laugh while trying to catch a gopher, and the series tries to frame it as an obvious ‘See, they’re meant to be together! They’re besties!’ Which is utter and complete bull.

Let me show you some actual believable friendships.

These are five gifs of five different friendships from five different shows. They’re all from different genres and decades, and are of varying length. They all have different dynamics yet they all feel ‘real’. They’re complex and multifaceted. The characters are well rounded and they’re dynamics established enough that you could dump them in a room with nothing to do and they would still be entertaining because they bounce off each other so well.

These are friendships where the characters do things with each other, talk with each other, and support each other. They play together, cry together, and survive/fight together. They argue and make up. They tease and compliment. They plan out elaborate schemes and sometimes they just chill together; and it’s not always ‘plot’ related or there to prove a point. They’re allowed to just exist.

Tangled the Series doesn’t allow it’s characters to exist as people. We’re told they are friends but we aren’t actually shown how they get along.

Rapunzel and Cass only fight. Eugene and Lance haven’t had a real convo since the middle of season two. Cassandra isn’t allowed to interact with anyone but Rapunzel and Zhan Tiri, unless she’s torturing them. The Brotherhood never reunite on screen. Rapunzel is supposedly has all these ‘friends’ with the pub thugs and the townspeople, but she never has a meaningful connection with any of them. And poor Varian isn’t allowed on screen with the mains, unless he’s useful to the plot.

Therefore the audience can’t connect with the characters as the characters aren’t permitted to connect with each other. All of the actual leg work is actually being done by the fans, 90% of which is just headcanons at this point.

But most damaging of all is that the writers took a woman who was isolated from 18 years of her life and denied her an an actual support group and the chance to make some real connections with people and the world aronud her, and tried to pass that off as ‘growth’ and ‘something young girls should look up too.’

How do you fail to understand the assignment that badly?

This Isn’t ‘Sweet’; It’s Disturbing

So Rapunzel dismissed this poor girl as being a ‘dud’ earlier this season, because she’s too obsessed with her ex to see anyone else. Only to choose to give Faith a chance when she starts to remind her of her of said ex. Only for Faith to turn out to be the ex in disguise; an ex who is also a violent criminal.

That’s the plot to fucking Vertigo!  

You know the horror movie where the dude’s creepy obsession is actually very controlling and manipulative, and the lack of honesty in the relationship and heaps of gaslighting both ways winds up getting one of them dead?

Why are we trying to frame such a toxic dynamic as being charming and something good for the mains to work towards? Is it just because it’s gayer, or because it’s non-romantic and therefore not actually gay at all? Either way that’s really messed up.

Let’s Talk About The Timeline, Again

So the implication here is that Rapunzel hasn’t spent a Goodwill Festival without Cassandra before, but that makes zero sense.

As pointed out before, the Goodwill Festival in Rapunzel’s Enemy was six months after her 18th birthday and it came before the Day of Hearts in Under Raps. But Rapunzel’s Return had to have been Rapunzel’s 20th birthday due to season two being one full year, (which is backed by various dialogue), and we’ve already ready had a Hearts Day this season with the episode The King and Queen of Hearts. Additionally, there’s further dialogue in Cassandra’s Revenge to suggest that we’ve skipped over Rapunzel’s 21st birthday entirely.

All evidence points to season three being over a year long, with this episode being the main reason for it. There’s no way it’s only been six months since Rapunzel’s Return, not with Hearts Day already come and gone. Any other explanation you could come up with, such as the Goodwill Festival being bi-annual, or Hearts Day being on a different calendar like Easter is, still wouldn’t explain away this line nor be backed up by anything within the show.

The writers just went and fucked up their own timeline. Period. And there’s no excuse for it.

Meta Is Not Always Clever

Oh not this shit again. You know how many times I’ve had to critique meta jokes like this in published media?

It’s a lot more than you would think.

You see bad writers love to ‘make fun’ of often valid criticisms by pulling a ‘play with in a play’, or a meta ‘story’, or some such other bullshit and then condescend at whatever audience surrogate they’ve made into the strawman like the cowards that they are. It’s pathetic and stinks of depression.  

Compare this to something actually good, like The Ember Island Players in Avatar.

In that episode the writers were poking fun at themselves, not their audience. You know the people that allow them to work. They also didn’t use it an an excuse to go ‘well actually’ and defend what didn’t work in the story, like with Jet’s ambiguous death. They took their lumps and used the premise to further character development and future story points. It also wasn’t the bleeding second to last episode!

What separates the good meta from the bad meta is the level of self awareness you have and the amount of respect you have for your audience. Tangled the Series respects no one.

But That’s Literally What Happened Though

But is it accurate. Cass stole the moonstone, yelled ‘I’m Gothel’s daughter!’ as if that explained anything, and then fucked off for year after a big song and dance number. Only to reappear and start threating everyone for zero reason. Randomly shouting ‘It’s my destiny!’ at people when asked why, once again as if that explained anything. (Hint: It doesn’t. )

You can’t claim that Cassandra feels remorse for her actions if all she’s going to do is play the victim when facing the consequences for those actions. And contrary to popular belief, the audience does have minds of their own and aren’t going to automatically take the mains at their word if what they are preaching contradicts pervious information.

How Is Any Of This Rapunzel’s Fault Cass?

What do you want Cass? To be a guard? Attention from your parents? Praise and validation from strangers just because you exist?

Because Rapunzel literally has nothing to do with any of that.

Rapunzel didn’t stop you from becoming a guard. Quite the opposite in fact, as you gained opportunities while serving her.

Rapunzel has nothing to do with your relationship with your father, and your mom would still be a piece of shit even if she had kept you. In fact Rapunzel getting kidnapped while you got adopted by someone who actually loved you, was the best the best thing that could have happened to you. Rapunzel should be jealous of you, not the other way around.

Finally, no one would have paid two shits for you had Rapunzel never been rescued. You’re not owed attention Cassandra and there’s no reason to think you would get it from everyone if Rapunzel was suddenly out of the way.

That’s literally what this all about isn’t it? Cassandra wants the same hero worship that Rapunzel gets, but Cassandra hasn’t done anything to try achieve that. I mean if she had stolen the moonstone to stop the rocks, to be the hero, that would make some fucking sense, but that’s not what she did. She took the moonstone just cause and then decided to murder people just because. There’s no logic to that.

Behold, The Closest We Will Ever Get To Rapunzel Apologizing For Anything And It Means Nothing

Rapunzel is indeed a shitty person and a terrible friend, but she holds no responsibility for Cassandra’s actions. That’s on Cassandra.

It’s really frustrating to watch Rapunzel dodge culpability for the shit she’s actually done wrong, only for her to make apologies that she doesn’t need to just to try and ‘win’ back her abusive ex.

Worse she’s doing it on stage in front of people trying to ease tension the same way she manipulated her father earlier. It’s not genuine.

Cassandra’s Problem Was Never About ‘Communication’, Why Are You Now Pretending That It Is Show?

Cassandra was plenty honest about her feelings in seasons one and two. It’s Rapunzel who kept shutting her down and refused to listen.

However, it still doesn’t matter since their relationship problems weren’t the reason for Cassandra’s actions in season three.

They could have been, had the writers not ditched the burnt hand arc, but they did, so this is just a load of empty platitudes that don’t tie into the narrative anymore.

This Is Hollow

And even if ‘honesty’ was Cassandra’s problem, which it isn’t, then that still wouldn’t be an excuse for her actions.

Cassandra isn’t some poor misunderstood woobie in need of a hug. She tried to murder people, people who never did anything to her. She stole people’s agency and brainwashed them to hurt others for her. She kidnaped a minor and horribly abused him just because she was feeling pissy that day.

Sympathy only gets you so far. At some point you have to grow the fuck up and take responsibility for your own bullshit.

It’s Not ‘Complicated’; It’s Convoluted

If you have to break the fourth wall to tell your audience that something is ‘deep’ then it probably isn’t as profound as you think it is.

The woman who attempted to murder innocent people for no real reason is the bad guy. That’s oblivious, and no amount of shouting will change that.

Actually complexity would be taking the deeper themes that the work had been building up to, like it’s classism, authoritarianism, and abuse and tackling that head on instead of doubling over backwards to try and keep any of the mains from admitting fault for anything.

Something complex is logical but not easily resolvable; like an orphan being hounded by the government that was supposed to protect him and now needs to fight back in order to survive, but in doing so will inevitably harm others. That’s easy to understand but there’s no simple solution to be had.

Something convoluted however, is easily solvable but gets dragged out needlessly for increasingly illogical reasons. Like a supposedly intelligent woman choosing to kill her best friend, and harm a whole bunch of other people, cause a random blue ghost told her too. The solution to that is easy; don’t listen to the dumb daemon who isn’t offering you anything. But she keeps on listening even after knowing she was tricked, just cause.

This Is Cringe

Yeah, what is the point? What’s the point to any of this?

You’re not interested in telling a decent story. You get pissy when people offer improvements and double down on the stupid. Some of you even bully the fans online who call out your BS. Then you have the gall to act offended when people rightly walk away.

You’re not owed anything. If you’ve failed to keep your audience then that’s on you.

Moreover, you’re actually getting paid to make this, by the world’s leading animation company no less. You’re not some poor put upon 13 year old girl on fanfition.net being bullied by assholes who want everything catered to them. You’re grown adults, and supposedly professionals, so act like it!

Tumblr Will Not Let Me Physically Post The Whole Review Because It’s Too Large. 

The second half will be posted as soon as it’s done, but I make no promises as to when because of the holidays. 

[augustmoon259]

"Unholy Blood" Pureblood!Fem!Vampire Reader x Hayan Park

Ten years ago, people who could transform into vampires began to appear in Korea. Ever since then, these morphing vampires have been slaughtering people while hiding their true identities. But there's something that people don't know. A secret, that if it got out, would change the world and the way that people saw vampires forever.

Pureblood vampires. Vampires who are stronger, faster, and more powerful in every way. How do I know about them? Because I am a pureblood vampire.

o - o - o - o - o

My parents were both pureblood vampires. They used to live in Korea, before they had me. They decided to move to the US and settle down in a small town.

My life was a peaceful one. Sure, it was hard trying to hide my identity as a vampire, but it wasn't that bad. I was homeschooled, up until I was ready to go off to college.

College was a new experience for me. I had fun making new friends, taking classes taught by different teachers, and being in a new environment. I went home to visit my parents during breaks.

I wish I had gotten to say goodbye to them, if I knew that I'd never be able to see them again.

o - o - o - o - o

It was winter break. I was excited to see my parents again and spend time with them during the holidays. I had plans for movies we could watch together, games we could play, and more.

The bus stopped in my neighborhood, and I got off, still brimming with anticipation. That is, until I saw the smoke.

The smoke was coming from the direction of my family's home. I ran there as fast as I could. When I got there, I saw the firefighters putting out the last of the flames.

Our house was a complete wreck. I frantically rushed past the onlookers and firefighters to dig through the rubble, and search for my parents. I was dragged away, still screaming and sobbing.

Later, the police told me about what had happened. It was reported that two explosions were heard from our house, and then a fire started not long after. The firefighters were dispatched, but it still took a while for them to get from the station to our house. They found my parents' bodies, unrecognizable as they were.

The explosions were written off as gas leaks, since our house was an old one. This may have been a reasonable explanation to anyone else, but not me. I knew better.

We were pureblood vampires.

Any regular vampire that manages to consume the heart of a pureblood vampire would become a pureblood vampire themself. We knew this, but we thought we were safe here in the US, when vampires began to appear in Korea ten years ago.

My parents must have sacrificed themselves to destroy their hearts, along with their attackers.

Our mailbox still had some mail in it. Bills to pay, letters for my parents, and letters for me as well. I expected this. What I was not expecting was the note left in the mailbox, addressed to me.

If you want revenge for your parents' deaths, come to Korea.

I crushed the note in my hand.

Whoever came after my parents didn't succeed, but it cost my parents their lives. Now they're after me. They know I exist.

Fine. If they think I'll be easy prey, I'll prove them wrong.

o - o - o - o - o

Living in Korea was different from living in the States.

I had applied to study abroad, and the university I applied for was Hanguk University. I managed to rent an apartment at a decent price in a modest neighborhood. I heard that there was a nice church in the area, run by a priest who also takes care of orphans from the nearby orphanage.

It was hard enough adjusting to life in another country, never mind one where bloodthirsty monsters come out at night. Lucky for me, I had the distinct advantage of being one of those "monsters".

Admittedly, not only did I feel guilty for not being able to prevent my parents' deaths, I realized what a privileged life I had been living. All my life, just on the other side of the world, there were innocent people being terrorized by vampires.

But now I'm here, and I have the power to do something about it.

I'd find whoever was responsible for my parents' murders, and I'll rid the world of vampires, one bastard at a time.

Between going out at night to kill vampires, and scrounging up information about their secret hierarchy and criminal underworld, I was also busy with my normal, "human" life.

I attended the orientation for my new university.

Yet it wasn't at the orientation that I'd meet the woman who'd change my life.

o - o - o - o - o

The first day of school was always the same: new students rushing to find their classes, old students saying hi to their friends, and teachers making note of who to look out for that year.

I greeted a few people I had met at the orientation, but there was one girl who was going around greeting...everyone. She was quite pretty, with dark brown hair and eyes.

She was so enthusiastic, bowing her head at every person she came across, that I couldn't help but smile.

With her friendly demeanor, I was sure she'd already have made plenty of friends, but I noticed later that she had no one to sit at lunch with. I myself was sitting alone, but that was of my own volition. I debated whether or not to go to her table and sit with her, but I opted not to, in the end.

Over the next few days, I kept seeing her around. She still greeted everyone cheerfully, and had earned the nickname "Miss Popular" around campus. I found it very fitting for her.

Things continued on like this. Her, greeting everyone with enthusiasm but sitting alone. Me, silently watching her.

I decided that I had done enough observing, and that it was time to formally meet her.

Bringing my lunch with me over to her table, I sat across from her. She had started eating her lunch by then, so when I unexpectedly arrived at her table, she choked on her food.

"Hey! Hey, are you okay?!"

I got up from my seat, prepared to do the Heimlich maneuver if necessary, but she waved a hand to stop me, and grabbed a nearby water bottle with the other hand to drink. She beat her chest a few times until she was no longer gasping, and I sat down when I confirmed that she was fine. Other people who had noticed the incident went back to eating their lunches.

We sat there, awkwardly gazing at each other, until she groaned and covered her face with her hands in embarrassment.

"Nice going Hayan...first person who decides to sit with you at lunch, and you make a fool of yourself..."

"Oh no, that was my fault! I'm sorry for surprising you like that...so, uh, your name is Hayan?"

Hayan took one hand off her face, before slowly removing her remaining hand.

"Yes, my name is Hayan...Park Hayan."

I introduced myself, and then we...shook hands. I decided to start a new topic of conversation, before Hayan had an existential crisis.

"Hayan...is it alright if I call you Hayan?"

She nodded her head affirmatively before waiting for what else I had to say.

"I hope this isn't out of line for me to say, but I've sort of been watching you for a while now. I notice that you always say hi to everyone, but you're still sitting alone at lunch? Um, Hayan, do you have friends?"

Hayan looked taken aback for a moment, before hanging her head in shame.

"It's...it's complicated? I've been trying to make friends, and since I didn't attend the orientation, I thought saying hi to everyone would be a surefire way to meet new people, but I haven't had much luck..."

"You didn't attend the orientation? So that's why I didn't recognize you. Hayan, if you're trying to make new friends, would you...like to be friends?"

"Seriously?! I mean, how could I reject?!"

Hayan enthusiastically slammed her hands on the table and jumped up, before sheepishly sitting back down when she noticed people's curious glances.

"Yes! Let's be friends!"

I talked with Hayan until lunch was over, and it turned out that we had a lot in common. Neither Hayan nor I were able to finish our lunches, busy as we were with chatting with each other. We decided to exchange phone numbers to keep in touch with each other.

After that, I wasn't occupied with just school and my nighttime activities. I hung out with Hayan outside of school. We went to cafes and coffee shops to get drinks and spend more time with each other.

She and I were the same age: twenty. When I applied to Hanguk University, I had to apply as a freshman, since not all of my credits from my previous college transferred over.

Hayan was looking forward to a get together that some seniors had organized at a pub. Students from every year would be there, and she hoped to meet other freshman besides me. I wasn't one for drinking, since vampires couldn't get drunk anyway, but I decided to go for Hayan's sake.

Gatherings of college students tend to go south pretty quickly, but it was what happened after that was a disaster.

o - o - o - o - o

The pub was crowded, noisy, and filled with the laughter and shouting of overexcited young adults.

I sat down at a random table with Hayan. When we sat down, I heard someone suggest a drinking game to lighten the mood. Next thing I knew, we were all pointing fingers at each other, and Hayan was the unfortunate person chosen to drink.

Two hours and several more drinking games later, Hayan was still unsuccessful at making another friend. I was surprised to note that Hayan was not a lightweight at all. She had drunk nearly twenty bottles of soju by herself! And If I was being honest with myself, I thought that made her even more amazing than she already was.

"Hayan, do you want to go home now?"

"Ah, yeah, I guess so...It seems my latest plan to make friends failed..."

In my head, I could see the comical tears of defeat in her eyes.

Hayan got up and grabbed her bag, but before we left the pub, a senior announced one last drinking competition. It was between a heavyset senior named Jang and anyone who dared to challenge him. If no one won, the freshman had to show off a talent during our start of year trip.

I knew what was coming before anyone else. I decided to take bets, and when the drinking match was over, I made a nice one hundred thousand won from people who had bet Hayan would lose.

Actually, calling it a "match" would be wrong. It was so one-sided, I almost felt bad for Jang.

Hayan finally got her wish granted. I saw two freshman asking Hayan for her number to join their study group. As I looked at Hayan's giddy face, and the admiring expressions of everyone else around us, I felt happy for Hayan.

Just when Hayan was making a toast to her victory, the sirens went off.

The joy of everyone around us immediately died out, to be replaced with worry and fear instead.

People scrambled to gather their belongings and leave the pub, and I hurried over to Hayan's side.

"Come on, Hayan. We'd better go. The sirens mean that vampires will be out soon..."

"Right! Um, let's go!"

We left the pub, prepared to follow everyone else in order to catch the last bus.

"Hayan! Let me walk you home!"

Before I knew what was happening, there was a random guy standing in front of Hayan. He completely ignored me. If that wasn't enough to piss me off, his condescending smirk and the arrogant way he held himself did. Let me guess, this guy's one of those idiots who try to act macho in front of girls to impress them.

"Um, no thank you. I already have a friend I'm walking home with..."

"A friend? Sure you do. Come on, what are you so afraid of? Me?"

"Hey buster, back off. She already said she's got someone to walk home with!"

I shoved him away. As he recovered from my unexpected interference, he quickly masked his anger with the same infuriating smirk. He gave me a once over, before his smirk widened.

"So this must be the friend you mentioned. Well, I can always walk you both home."

Great. Just great. Not only is he wasting our precious time, he's hitting on Hayan and me.

"Tch. Fine. Clearly you're invested in walking with us, for some unfathomable reason, so I'll deign to let you join us, but only if I'm between you and Hayan."

He seemed to be more interested in Hayan than me, so I thought putting myself between her and him would get him to stop talking. Instead, he kept blabbering on about how vampires are no big deal, and there's nothing to worry about.

He's extremely lucky that we finally made it to the bus stop. Otherwise, I might have punched him.

There were some people running to get on the bus before it left. The annoying guy was still flirting with Hayan, but my attention was diverted when I heard a crash. The three of us turned our heads toward the source of the noise.

It was a man who had been thrown on the ground. The other man standing above him was obviously a gangster, a loan shark out to collect his debt. My intuition told me something bad was going to happen, and not because of the loan shark.

Sometimes, I hate being right.

It happened faster than the human eye could see, but I could discern perfectly with my vision. The man on the ground thrust his arm straight through the loan shark's chest.

As he stood up and shoved the now dead body off himself, the vampire walked closer step by step to Hayan and I. The annoying senior had long run away. He really was just a coward in the end. I would deal with him tomorrow. Right now, I had bigger things to worry about.

Normally, I'd just transform and then kill this no-name vampire, but I had to worry about Hayan. She was digging through her bag, looking for something. If only the bus was still around. Then Hayan could have run away and escaped.

I made a split second decision.

"Hayan. Listen to me. Run away as far as you can and don't look back."

"What? But, what about you? I can't leave you here alone!"

"Damn it Hayan, please just run away!"

"And where do you think you're going, bitch?!"

The vampire lunged towards Hayan and grabbed her hair. Before he could bite her, I transformed and slammed him to the ground. I smashed his head in, and watched as his body scattered into dust.

With the immediate threat out of the way, I checked on Hayan. She had fallen on the ground when the vampire let go of her hair. I helped her as she stood up weakly. Hayan blinked, as she alternated between looking at the crater where the vampire used to be, and me. I spread my arms out to either side, and gazed steadily back at her.

"This is me. This is who I really am. I'm a vampire, a monster that people want dead. Hayan...do you hate me too?"

I waited with bated breath for her answer. The truth is, I could erase her memories. Make it so she never remembered what happened this night. But I didn't want to.

Ever since my parents died, I had no one else who knew the truth of who I really was. I was good at pretending. I've been doing it my whole life. But I needed just one person I didn't have to pretend with, and I hoped that person could be Hayan.

Hayan studied my white hair and blue eyes. She looked pensive.

"No...no I don't hate you. Because you're my friend."

She hugged me, and if I noticed that her hold was tighter than normal, I didn't mention it.

"Hayan...thank you."

I hugged her back.

We remained like that for a while, until I offered to take her home.

"Wait, you want to...you want to carry me?! In-in your arms?!"

"Well, yes. I could also give you a piggyback ride, but since I'll be running and jumping on rooftops, this should be more comfortable for you."

"O-okay."

Putting one arm under Hayan's legs, and the other supporting her back, I made sure Hayan was securely in my hold when I leapt from the ground. Hayan kept her eyes closed the entire time, until I landed with a thump in front of the church.

"Good night, Hayan."

I smiled softly and gave Hayan a small wave, before hurrying home.

o - o - o - o - o

Hayan and I grew closer after that night.

Since I no longer had to pretend I was human around her, I invited her over to my apartment, and vice versa. She introduced me to her "father" and her "siblings".

"It's nice to meet you sir. I mean, Father Michael. Um, Father-Michael-sir?"

As it turns out, Hayan was an orphan. I knew she lived in the same neighborhood as me, but not at the orphanage next to the church that I heard about when I first rented my apartment. The neighborhood ladies were always giggling about Father Michael, but he was more intimidating in person, even to a pureblood vampire like me.

"At ease. You're the friend Hayan has been talking about?"

"Sir, yes, sir!"

Hayan was fighting back laughter behind me, while I kept on sweating nervously.

"It's good she has a friend like you."

"Thank you, Father!"

I barely held back a sigh of relief that I seemed to make a good impression on Hayan's adoptive father. It was time to meet the younger siblings now.

"Woah! This is all for us?!"

Hayan's adoptive siblings, Yerim and Yunsu, bounced around eagerly when they saw I had brought bread for them. Hayan told me her siblings really loved bread, especially sticky rice bread. I had bought a couple for them from the school dining hall, and then went to a bakery to buy some more bread (mochi, sesame, tapioca, etc.) Since I couldn't eat any of it myself, I bought what was recommended to me by the baker, and hoped for the best.

"Hayan! You need to bring your friend by more often!"

"You are my new favorite person!"

"I thought I was your favorite person?!"

I chuckled as Hayan chased her siblings around in order to catch them and tickle them.

Hayan has such a lovely family. It's no wonder she's also a lovely person.

o - o - o - o - o

It was a normal evening at the university. I had stayed behind at school to work on homework and assignments with some classmates.

The student body was abuzz today with new gossip about the "super senior". He was the senior who had entered college nine years ago, and still had yet to graduate. This was none of my business. What was my business was that he was rude and a bully. In fact, just that afternoon, he had bumped into Hayan and insulted her instead of apologizing. If I saw him, I'd give him a piece of my mind, regardless if his family was well off or not.

After finishing our assignments, I accompanied my classmates on their way to get the last shuttle bus. To my displeasure, we had the misfortune of running into the aforementioned "super senior" Byungsu.

My classmates greeted him, but when he gave them no reply, they said goodbye to me and ran off to catch the bus.

I noticed that he seemed to be in a daze. Hayan did tell me that it seemed like he was sick, and looking at him now, I could tell that she was speaking the truth. Regardless of any beef I had with him, if he was feeling unwell, he should go see a doctor.

"Hey, Byungsu. Do you need to go to the hospital?"

He didn't answer, instead just glaring at me, and clenching his fists. Whatever was going through his mind at that moment was not pleasant. I wanted to ask him more questions, but we were interrupted by a man on the phone.

It was Professor Donggyu Park. He was not one of my professors, but Hayan said he's one of her favorites. He's very dedicated to his job, has memorized all of his students' names, and even speaks to students on days he doesn't teach. It looked like he was in a hurry to get home, judging by how he greeted us quickly and then got into his car.

I was too late to stop what happened next.

Byungsu threw Professor Park's car into the air. It flipped over and landed on its top with a crash. I dashed toward the car to check on Professor Park. He was bleeding from his head and unconscious, but he was still alive.

I was the one who was clenching my fists this time. Well, I had the perfect target to vent my anger out on.

This side of the school was deserted at this time of the night, and the security cameras were down for maintenance today. With no one watching me, I could kill Byungsu.

He was heading this way, no doubt to murder the professor.

I opened the car door, gently took Professor Park out, and placed him on the ground. Then I transformed.

"What the fuck, you're a vampire too?"

"Shut up. You won't be alive for long anyway."

My hand was enveloped in blue flames as I disappeared and then reappeared in front of Byungsu. I grabbed his face, and watched as it melted away. The fire burned everything and left nothing behind, not even ashes.

After de-transforming, I performed first aid on Professor Park and called 119.

When the ambulance arrived, I was questioned by police officers about what had happened. I told them the fake story I made up: I was with some classmates on their way to catch the last bus home, and then we ran into Byungsu. I went back inside the university to get something I had forgotten. When I came back outside, I saw Professor Park's car turned over and him inside unconscious.

I was held in questioning until the police contacted my classmates to confirm I was with them. Professor Park woke up after receiving emergency medical attention, and told the police he had also seen Byungsu. That, coupled with the sudden emergence of footage showing Byungsu had caused a traffic accident and killed the victims, all but cemented the fact that Byungsu the vampire had attacked Professor Park.

Byungsu was put on the national wanted list, and around campus people started calling me "The Lifesaver".

o - o - o - o - o

To recap, since school started, I became friends with Hayan, saved her from a vampire by revealing my secret, met Father Michael and Hayan's younger siblings, and also saved another person from a vampire attack.

My life in Korea had been extremely eventful, and it only became more so with the introduction of Detective Euntae Hwang.

It was another day at the university, and there were students outside of the school protesting the recent vampire attacks. I was irritated, but I could also understand where they were coming from. Recent examples like Byungsu had shown that it was all too easy for vampires to hide on campus.

I was with Hayan, and the two other freshman she had met at the pub.

"Excuse me, are you Hayan Park?"

We all turned around to see a handsome red haired man. I looked at Hayan, and from her reaction, she recognized him.

"Hayan," I whispered to her, "you know this man?"

"Yes," she whispered back, "he saved me and my siblings from gangsters this one time."

Well, if he helped Hayan, he could be a good person, but he could also be faking it...

"Oh, and you must be the other person I'm looking for!"

I pointed at myself in surprise. "Me?"

"Yes, you! Let me introduce myself..."

He smiled, before proceeding to tell us all how about how he graduated from the police academy at the top of his class...and how he was made captain of the criminal investigations unit...and how he was the superstar of the vampire task force....and...

I sighed and facepalmed.

"We get it, you're a detective. Please, we don't need to hear your entire life story..."

"Oh, silly me! I chattered on for too long, huh?"

Hayan's friends said goodbye before leaving us with the detective, blushes still present on their faces. As Hayan and I walked to the dining hall with the detective to continue our conversation with him, I noticed a lot of attention on us. Or rather, the detective.

By the time we got to our destination, Hayan and I had begrudgingly learned more about him.

He wasn't kidding when he said he was an expert about vampires. He had even invented a method to kill vampires: paralyzing them and then burning them alive in a furnace. To create such a brutal method, this man...he was dangerous.

I was on my guard while waiting for what else he had to say. He had ordered an entire table's worth of food, while I ordered drinks for Hayan and I. He insisted on buying food for us as well, but I rejected him quite firmly.

The detective, Euntae Hwang as he called himself, asked us about the vampire who had killed the loan shark. Apparently, that was what Detective Hwang was investigating. The police were trying to figure out how the vampire died, and if it was related to the recent case of Byungsu...

I could tell that Hayan was nervous around the detective. He must be bringing up bad memories of the vampire attack.

Detective Hwang didn't let up in his interrogation though. If anything, he got more extreme. Did he suspect Hayan and I were vampires? Well, that wouldn't do. I pondered how to get out of this mess, when something unexpected happened.

The detective cut his hand with the knife he was using for his food.

It was quite a deep cut, and the blood flowed steadily from the wound.

"Ouch! I cut myself! I guess my fingers were too tense..."

Was he that desperate to reveal us as vampires? I'm glad I had the foresight to order a drink, so that I had something else to focus on instead of the blood. But it made me upset that Hayan seemed to look even more uncomfortable now.

"Detective, why don't you go to the nurse's office and get a bandage for that cut?"

"Are you sure? I can always get a bandage at the police station..."

"No, no, you should definitely go and get that checked out. The sooner the better."

"Alright then. I suppose this is goodbye for now."

'For now?' I hope that's 'forever' instead. The detective left after packing up the rest of his food, and I wanted Hayan and I to go home as quickly as possible, but Hayan insisted on buying some sticky rice bread for her siblings. I was going to object, but caved after Hayan gave me her best pair of puppy dog eyes.

The line for the baked goods was long today. We waited for a while, until we finally bought the bread and left the dining hall. But, we ran into the detective on our way out.

"Hey, we meet again!"

I facepalmed, for a different reason this time.

"Yayyyy...so glad we keep running into each other."

If he noticed my sarcasm, the detective didn't comment on it.

"Well, we'd love to stay and chat more, but Hayan has to go home and take care of her very sick siblings..."

"Huh? But my siblings aren't -"

"Yep! Very sick! Oh the poor little ones!"

I grabbed Hayan's hand and we speed walked away from the detective...

....

....

"It's time for us to takes matters into our own hands! Let's prove that we're not vampires!"

Damn it.

The protestors from earlier were now cutting people in order to prove that they weren't vampires. It was chaos all around us. Some students were willing, but most thought that the student council protestors were taking it too far. I thought about going back inside and waiting for the chaos to die down. There had to be teachers who would stop this madness, right?

I felt a hand on my shoulder. I looked back to see it was Detective Hwang.

He leaned down to whisper to Hayan and I, "Just start walking." So we did exactly that, until we were stopped.

The student council members were blocking our path.

"Have you done the test to prove you're not a vampire?"

They weren't backing down. Hayan raised a complaint, but that only seemed to make them angrier. One of them grabbed Hayan's wrist, and I prepared to brush it off, but when he pulled back Hayan's sleeve, we all saw the bandage on her arm.

It was still wet with blood.

But whose? Is it...the detective's? From when he cut his hand earlier with the knife? When and how did he get the bandage onto Hayan's arm?

"You see? We already did it. Do you need more proof?"

Detective Hwang was calm and collected as he slid Hayan's sleeve back down. That should have been the end of the matter, but a new obstacle stood in our way: the student council leader.

"She could have gotten that bandage anywhere. I wasn't able to see her do the test, so I need her to do it again."

This was getting ridiculous.

The student council leader made a go at grabbing Hayan's arm again, but Detective Hwang caught him midair.

"It's a crime to go around using a blade on people against their will. Unless you want to be charged, I suggest stopping."

He flashed his police ID at the student council members, which was finally enough to get them to leave us alone. The three of us were able to get away from campus unimpeded.

I was reluctantly grateful for the detective. Hayan and I could have waited inside the university, but then the council members would have kept accosting other students outside. With the threat of police intervention, they'd be unlikely to continue.

"Thank you...Detective Hwang."

"Oh please, call me Captain."

"...Captain Hwang."

He added his number to Hayan and I's contacts, before the three of us parted ways.

o - o - o - o - o

I had gotten a text from Hayan.

I...I need you. Please...please come. I'm sitting in front of the pizza restaurant...

I knew exactly where Hayan was referring to. I grabbed my umbrella and my rain jacket, before quickly heading out to find Hayan. I had no idea why she'd send me such a strange text, but whatever the reason, it sounded urgent.

The rain was pouring, and Hayan was absolutely soaked.

"Hayan! You're going to get sick like that!"

I gave Hayan my umbrella to hold, while I went into the nearest store to buy a towel for Hayan. I came back out and gave her the towel to dry off while still holding onto the umbrella. After she finished drying off, Hayan looked...dejected.

"Can you tell me now why you called me out here?"

Hayan kept her head lowered as she explained what happened to her.

"Father Michael...he...he and I got into a fight."

"You got into a fight...? About what?"

"He...he's not letting me go to school anymore."

"What?!"

I was flabbergasted. Then, my astonishment turned into indignation.

"He...he can't do that! You haven't even finished the semester yet!"

"I know...I tried arguing against it, but he...he's made up his mind."

"Hayan..."

I was still aggravated on Hayan's behalf, but seeing her appear so defeated dampened my mood.

"Maybe you need to spend some time away from Father Michael...that could do both you and him good."

"But...where would I stay?"

"Don't be siily! You can stay with me!"

"Really...? You'd do that for me?"

"Of course!"

I gave Hayan a hug. She was no longer frowning, but grinning in relief instead.

Hayan stayed over at my apartment that night. She went home briefly to get her things and her scooter, and to tell Father Michael she was staying over at my place. That made him more upset, but Hayan didn't care. She was still mad at him.

My apartment was relatively small, so I didn't have a guest room for Hayan to stay in. She told me it was okay, and decided to sleep on my couch instead. I was embarrassed I couldn't get Hayan a more comfortable place to sleep.

The next day, Hayan and I decided to go on a walk in the neighborhood to cool off. It was raining again, and we saw a bunch of people gathered around the street gutters. They were panicking, and when we peeked inside the gutter to see the source of all the commotion, we saw a cat close to drowning.

I wanted to help the cat, but I didn't want to reveal my alter ego. Then, I came up with a brilliant idea.

"Attention, please! Does everyone here know what tug of war is? Yes? We can do something similar! Everyone here line up behind me, and hold on to the person in front of you! Then, pull with all your might!"

They did as I instructed, and with the help of my vampire strength, we were able to pull the lid off of the gutter and save the cat. Someone had called 119 beforehand, but since we all saved the cat, there was nothing left to do but get our picture taken in the newspaper. Hayan and I were one of the people who received the "Good Samaritan Award".

Hayan wanted to go home and tell Father Michael about how we saved the cat. I didn't think it was a good idea, but I conceded in the end. Surely Father Michael couldn't be mad about saving an innocent animal's life?

I was disappointed to find that I was wrong. Hayan came to me in tears. She had another argument with Father Michael. So another night passed where Hayan stayed over with me.

Father Michael called Hayan the next morning to tell her that he, Yerim, and Yunsu moved to another neighborhood. He sounded apologetic about the day before. He told Hayan that he moved her stuff to their new home, and if she'd like to come over to see it.

"Go ahead, I don't mind. You should check up on your siblings too."

I gave Hayan a thumbs up, and encouraged her to go. I'd still be there for her when she needed me. Hayan gratefully thanked me, and went over to check up on her siblings, and Father Michael. She called me later, in better spirits.

"I patched things up with Father Michael. It's still kind of rough, but we're making progress."

"Hayan, that's great news! Why don't you stay over tonight then?"

"Okay...."

Hayan stayed with Father Michael, Yerim, and Yunsu for the rest of the week, while I was busy with school. I had mostly accepted the fact that Hayan wouldn't be going to college anymore, but at least we could still hang out together outside of it.

o - o - o - o - o

I got a request from Hayan to come and watch over her siblings for her, while she went out.

"Thank you so much for coming over! Yerim and Yunsu are in bed, but if they wake up and need anything, I feel much better knowing you're there with them."

"It's no problem at all! But just out of curiosity, what do you need to go out for?"

"Father Michael still hasn't come home, even though it's already night time. He's never been this late before..."

"Oh, I see. You'll be going to the church then?"

"Yep!"

"Okay, I'll see you when you get back!"

I expected Hayan to come back with Father Michael, after dealing with whatever was keeping him busy at the church.

But instead, Hayan came back with a police officer and a coroner.

"Unnie, what's going on?"

Yerim and Yunsu were rubbing the sleep from their eyes after they had been woken up by Hayan.

"As Ms. Park requested, the three of you present, sans Ms. Park's friend, are the next of kin of Father Michael. It is with a heavy heart and our deepest condolences that we announce the passing of Myeongsu Choi on this night. We are sorry for your loss, and offer you all our deepest sympathies."

After the coroner announced the death of Father Michael, the police officer and the coroner left to allow Hayan and her siblings to grieve. Yerim and Yunsu were quiet, before tears started falling from their eyes.

"U-unnie, what did they mean? F-father Michael is dead?"

"Yerim....Yunsu..."

Since Hayan arrived earlier, she had tried keeping up a strong front for her siblings. But as she embraced them in her arms, I saw her shoulders trembling. I enveloped Hayan in my arms as the four of us stood there, the quiet of the apartment interspersed with the sniffles and sobs of Hayan and her siblings.

Three days later, Father Michael's funeral was held. Captain Hwang came, along with everyone in the neighborhood, to pay their respects to Father Michael.

I stayed with Hayan and her siblings the days after the funeral. Hayan and her siblings had to prepare to move out, because of the death of their adoptive father. I helped them pack their things back at the apartment, while Hayan visited the rectory to get Father Michael's belongings.

She later told me about the letters Father Michael had written to her.

"He wrote all those letters...for me....he wanted to give them to me, but never found the chance to..."

'And now he never would', was left unsaid.

"I found this too...a business card from the Red Bomb Club."

"Red Bomb Club?!"

That was a club I had found out about during my nighttime excursions. Vampires frequented the club, and even worse, they lured unsuspecting humans in to become their prey, by posing as a safe haven.

"Why did Father Michael have a business card?"

"I don't know, but I overheard police officers at the funeral say a bunch of them had been stuck in Father's pockets."

"Could this be related? You don't think...they killed Father Michael?"

"Not just think...I know they did."

Hayan looked absolutely enraged.

"What will you do now?"

"I want to get revenge. But there's something I have to tell you first...at the church tonight."

o - o - o - o - o

Hayan and I snuck away to the church after making sure Yerim and Yunsu were safe and sound.

The roof and the walls of the church had burned away, leaving gaping holes for the moonlight to stream in.

"Okay, we're at the church. What did you want to talk about?"

"Remember that day you saved me from a vampire? You were truthful with me then, so I want to be truthful with you now."

"Truth? What truth?"

"I'm...also a pureblood vampire."

Before my very eyes, Hayan pulled her hair free from her ponytail, and I watched as it lost its color. Her eyes that I loved so much turned blue, like my own eyes when I transformed.

"This...this is...."

"I'm sorry for not telling you sooner, especially when you told me first..."

"....Amazing!"

"Huh? You're not betrayed? Upset I kept this from you?"

"Why would I be upset, dummy? You're the first pureblood I've ever met aside from my parents."

"Your parents? You never talk about them..."

"That's because..." I hesitated before forcing out the words. "...they died."

"Oh...would it be alright if I asked how?"

"They died in a fire after sacrificing themselves."

"Just like Father Michael..."

Hayan and I contemplated our losses, and the tragedies that led us to where we were at present.

"Is it okay now if I asked about your life? How did you end up with Father Michael?"

"Father Michael...took me in when I was ten. I had no one and nowhere left to go. I hated myself so much that...I even tried to turn myself in for being a vampire."

"And Father Michael stopped you?"

"Yes...Father Michael became a second dad for me."

"What happened to your birth parents?"

"I can't remember. My memories of before I met Father...are unclear."

"Well, I'll help you get your memories back! After you get revenge on Father Michael's killer."

"Thank you...thank you so much..."

Hayan hugged me tightly, just like the day I saved her from the vampire.

After she and I let go of each other, I took Hayan's hands in mine.

"Hayan...I'll always be by your side. And I'm not just saying this because we're both pureblood vampires. Even if I wasn't a vampire, I'd support you no matter what. You're my friend, and I'll be there for you, through whatever hardships may come."

"And you can depend on me too. You don't have to shoulder your burdens alone."

Hayan and I left the church, our hands still interlocked.

[ibijau]

Jin Rusong Lives pt 13 / On AO3

Nie Huaisang investigates

“What do you mean he was taken?” Nie Huaisang snarled, tightening his grip on his disciple’s collar.

“I don't know, I was just on duty at the gate!" the man said. "They arrived and said to warn you right away while they get checked by Nie Zhilan, I don’t know what happened! They just told me he’s gone, and Jin Yixin too.”

Nie Huaisang pushed the man out of the way and ran toward the infirmary. He thought he heard Lan Xichen call his name, but ignored it, filled with terror over Jin Rusong’s fate.

He should never have allowed the child to leave the Unclean Realm, not even under surveillance, not even to a place so close. Jin Guangyao had left too many enemies behind them, and most of those didn’t have Nie Huaisang’s fondness for his son. Why should they? Jin Guangyao had ordered entire sects killed, people had lost sons, daughters, grandchildren, it was only natural they'd want the same to happen to their enemy's child. Nie Huaisang was the last person with a right to blame others for their dreams of revenge, and yet in this case, he could not allow it. 

Jin Rusong was family, just as surely as his brother, or his sect, or even Lan Xichen. They were all his and he would set the world on fire if anything happened to that child.

On the way to the infirmary, Nie Huaisang spotted Nie Funyu on the training ground. His first disciple looked surprised at first, then concerned when Nie Huaisang barked that lessons for the day were cancelled. He was a smart man though, and when his sect leader ordered that the distress signal Wen Ning had left them be used immediately, Nie Funyu asked no question and ran to obey.

There were four men in the infirmary when Nie Huaisang got there, as well as Nie Zhilan who had a severe look on her face. The first thing that came to Nie Huaisang’s mind when he saw those men was that they were not, and by far, the strongest cultivators to be found in the Unclean Realm. They were good, friendly people, and as large as most Nie disciples were, but their skill was nothing spectacular. Of course, it was Nie Huaisang’s own fault if Jin Yixin hadn’t picked anyone more capable to come with her and her student. If he hadn’t been so distracted, he’d have told her exactly who to take with her instead of leaving that to her own judgement. How could she have known who to trust, when she'd mixed so little with others?

Out of those four men, Qian Zhixian was the one in best shape, though he still had a number of bruises, and appeared to have trouble with one elbow. The others were more seriously injured, with one at least having a bleeding gash on his forehead, and another whose leg might have been broken. Qian Zhixian gave an awkward, one handed bow to his sect leader, and dared not meet Nie Huaisang’s eyes.

“Zongzhu, we have failed you.”

“You have. What happened?”

All four men winced at his tone, but Qian Zhixian started explaining. Everything had gone well at first, they’d reached that little field without trouble, and Jin Yixin had started her lesson. At one point, she had asked the four Nie disciples to walk a little further away, so she could explain certain things that pertained to the Jin sect’s particular way of cultivating. They’d done so without question, respecting the need for secrecy in these things, and had spread out in the field so they could continue keeping an eye on every direction.

As far as they could tell, all four of them had been attacked at the same time, though they were not quite sure who, or what, had attacked them, their opponents shrouded in dark mist to hide their identity. The fight had been too hard for them, and they all went down with shameful speed, losing consciousness for a while. Qian Zhixian had been the first to wake up again, since he hadn’t been hit quite as hard, and he’d quickly woken up his companions as well.

“We’d have sent a signal,” Qian Zhixian said when Nie Huaisang’s glare intensified, “but whoever ambushed us took them from us. So we came back as fast as we could, and gave the alert.”

“What about Jin Yixin? Where was she while you were fighting?”

“We don’t know. Since she was gone too, we think maybe she tried to protect the little boy, and whoever took him had to take her too.”

“Hm. When Nie Zhilan is done healing you, report to Nie Funyu for punishment,” Nie Huaisang ordered. “I will not be disappointed again. Did you look around at all for any clues before returning here?”

“We thought it was more important to give the alarm, zongzhu.”

Nie Huaisang cursed. If he’d been there, he would have sent one man to raise the alarm, and asked the others to search their surroundings, in case whoever took Jin Rusong had left some traces of their identity. Not that he thought those four were the sort who would have noticed anything. Good, kind men, but hardly sharp. If he’d been there, if he hadn’t stupidly trusted others…

“I’ll deal with you four later,” Nie Huaisang decided. “If you remember anything of importance, send someone to warn me. I’m going to inspect that field myself.”

Without another look at his disciples, he stormed out of the infirmary.

That was why he’d worked alone all these years. There were good people in his sect, loyal and strong and most of them kind, but they just weren’t cut out for the sort of world that Jin Guangyao had created, the world they were still dealing with. Everyone around him was just too honest, and stupidly assumed that others were as well. Honesty was all nice and well, but Nie Huaisang couldn’t count on people who didn’t even think to…

“Huaisang!” Lan Xichen called, running up to him just as he was about to reach the main gate. He was breathless and pale, as if the news had undone what several weeks of rest had restored of his health.

“He’s disappeared,” Nie Huaisang coldly said when Lan Xichen had reached him. “Jin Yixin too. I’m going to see if I find any clues.”

Lan Xichen startled, but nodded.

“I’m coming too.”

“In your state?” Nie Huaisang sneered. “What good will you be? It’s my fault if this happened, I’ll deal with it. Go rest, I can do this on my own.”

Lan Xichen grew paler yet, but when Nie Huaisang tried to move, Lan Xichen caught him by the wrist with surprising strength for a man looking so exhausted.

“I’m coming too. If you’re responsible, then so am I. If you’re going to look for him, so am I.”

“That’s not…”

“Don’t push me away again,” Lan Xichen pleaded, tightening his grip. “You don’t have to do it alone this time.”

Years of habit screamed in Nie Huaisang’s mind, telling him not to rely on others, not to get anyone involved in his business, least of all Lan Xichen whose honesty and determination to do things properly could only lead to disaster.

But Lan Xichen was right there, just as worried about what had happened to Jin Rusong, eager to help get their little boy back. And he was theirs now, at least for the time being. Their child, in danger.

Of course Nie Huaisang couldn’t do that alone.

“Then let’s go,” Nie Huaisang said, freeing his wrist so he could hold Lan Xichen’s hand and give him support as they left the Unclean Realm. 

-

Just as Nie Huaisang remembered, the field mentioned by Jin Yixin was quite close to the Unclean Realm, and visible from its walls. The attack might have been noticed if patrols had been more frequent, which told him he’d need to do something about that.

In Nie Mingjue’s days, the walls would have been guarded constantly, in all directions. In Nie Mingjue’s days, something like this could never have happened. 

“There are signs of struggle here,” Wen Ning noted quietly. “Not very strong ones, but it's there anyway, look..”

He had joined them as they were walking toward the field, explaining that he’d sent Lan Sizhui to warn Jin Rulan there was a problem as soon as they’d seen the signal. Hopefully, both boys would be there by morning.

It would not be pleasant to explain to Jin Rulan what had happened, nor what Nie Huaisang was starting to suspect about the situation. But he wouldn't throw accusations until he was sure of himself. The last thing they needed after such a mess was a diplomatic incident.

“There are only those weak signs,” Nie Huaisang remarked, coming closer to Wen Ning to look again. “Jin Rusong, no doubt. Whatever happened, he did not wish to go. But as for Jin Yixin…”

There was no sign of serious fighting in the spot where Jin Yixin and Jin Rusong would have stood when the attack occurred. Aside from the grass being slightly flattened in two places, leaving indents too small to have come from anyone but Jin Rusong, nothing was amiss. Odd, when she'd more than proven she was a very strong fighter.

“They might have knocked her unconscious right away,” Lan Xichen suggested, sitting on a rock, the walk to the field having been a little too much for him.

Nie Huaisang threw him a look. Lan Xichen grimaced, and shook his head.

“I also find it unlikely,” he admitted. “Unless they neutralised her in such a manner that she couldn't fight them off at all, and yet didn't fall either… But if she wasn't attacked, then it means she allowed all this to happen, and either ran away on her own or left with the kidnappers. Why would she do that? Didn’t you say that Jin Rulan vouched for her?”

“People’s trust can be misplaced,” Nie Huaisang retorted bitterly. “And I didn’t get to know her well enough to make an opinion regarding her personality. She made no effort to mix with us, and I was too preoccupied by other matters to go against her wishes. I should have seen something was strange! I should have guessed, there must have been signs…”

With some effort, Lan Xichen rose from his improvised seat and went to join the other two.

“I shouldn’t have let them come here today,” Nie Huaisang said while Lan Xichen took his hand. “I should have been more careful. To make a mistake like that…”

“It’s probably not that bad,” Wen Ning said. “They could have killed him, but they just kidnapped him. Whoever took him might just want to use him as a bargaining chip against you or Jin Rulan.”

“That’s not as reassuring as you think,” Nie Huaisang snapped.

“It should be. A hostage can be freed, a corpse can’t be saved,” Wen Ning pointed out. Then, remembering his own situation, he sheepishly added: “Not usually, anyway.”

Nie Huaisang felt Lan Xichen shiver, while he thought he might faint, clutching too hard at each other's hand, both thinking of the last time Jin Rusong had gone missing. 

It had only been a very short while back then, and he'd been in Jinlin Tai with his family, all of his father's sect, as well as some prestigious guests. Nie Huaisang remembered that nobody had been particularly worried when they realised they hadn't seen the little boy in a while and started looking for him. He couldn't have gone very far, they'd all thought, and with so many people present, he'd be spotted soon. 

They'd been right. They'd found his body very quickly, and very near. Nie Huaisang and Lan Xichen had been close by when Qin Su had screamed, and they'd seen that little boy they loved so much, lifeless on the floor of a small room near the hall where they'd been having a banquet. 

They'd all been drinking and laughing, while he died alone. 

Nie Huaisang could not go through that again. It would kill him if it happened again, and under his watch this time. 

"It's getting dark, you two won't be able to do much," Wen Ning remarked. "Go back inside, get some rest. I'll continue looking around in case they left some traces while escaping." 

It was the sensible thing to do, but Nie Huaisang had half a mind to keep looking as well. It just didn't feel right to merely go sleep, not when poor Jin Rusong was among strangers and likely terrified. 

If he had been alone, Nie Huaisang would have continued looking too. But Lan Xichen was there as well, shaken by the shock of that incident, still not fully recovered from his too harsh seclusion. If Nie Huaisang did not care about himself, he worried about Lan Xichen's well-being, and he knew the other man would refuse to return to the Unclean Realm alone. 

That either of them could sleep seemed unlikely, but if they managed to rest they would be of more use, should morning bring any news. 

-

After threats from Nie Zhilan, Lan Xichen reluctantly took some medicine to help him catch some sleep. Nie Zhilan was furious at him for exerting himself beyond what she'd allowed, and equally angry at Nie Huaisang for not preventing it. As Lan Xichen drifted to sleep, in Nie Huaisang’s bed rather than his own so he could be reached quicker if something happened, Nie Zhilan threatened to force feed her sect leader that same medicine as punishment, only dropping the matter when he made it clear he was in no mood for a playful argument. Nie Huaisang even managed to obtain a different medicine to wake Lan Xichen up, in case the first one had not naturally worn off by the time Jin Rulan and Lan Sizhui arrived. 

In the end, it was not necessary. Shortly after Lan Xichen woke up on his own, the two young men were directed to Nie Huaisang's private quarters. 

"You were supposed to look after him!" Jin Rulan exploded as he rushed inside the room. "And now your disciples tell me Rusong's been kidnapped?" 

Coming in after him, Lan Sizhui looked calmer, but equally unhappy. He frowned at the sight of Lan Xichen still laying in Nie Huaisang’s bed, and that hint of judgment, combined with the exhaustion of a sleepless night, and the guilt of failure, got the better of Nie Huaisang. 

"I was supposed to look after him, and Jin zongzhu was supposed to send a trustworthy teacher!" he snapped. "Every sign indicates that Jin Yixin helped his kidnappers, and is probably hiding with them right now." 

"She'd never do that!" Jin Rusong retorted. "Jin Yixin is a well respected elder! Uncle Jiang and me checked her background carefully before selecting her! She's always dedicated herself to teaching, never meddled with politics if she could avoid it. And she had a very good relationship with Qin Su, so she wouldn't hurt her son."

"You'd be surprised what people would do to their friends." 

"They weren't just friends! Jin Yixin and Qin Su are cousins, so she's family, she could never hurt Rusong." 

"I think Jin Guangyao proved well enough that family… wait, cousins ?"

Arms crossed on his chest, Jin Rulan nodded firmly while Nie Huaisang stared, too tired to make sense of that new revelation.

"Something close to that anyway,” Jin Rulan explain. “I think she might actually be Qin Cangye's cousin? But they're related anyway. I'd forgotten about it when we thought of asking her, but she told us she'd be happy to help her family, so obviously she can't have…" 

"Jin Rulan, you're an idiot," Nie Huaisang cut him. "And I'm an imbecile. Qin Cangye! Of course!" 

Lan Xichen slowly sat up on the bed, still groggy from the medicine he’d taken but looking agitated by the news.

"Did anyone warn him about Rusong?" he slurred. 

"I didn't think it concerned him," Jin Rulan said. "Rusong isn't his real grandson, is he? Uncle Jiang agreed, too." 

"You were raised in Lanling, so I'll excuse you for being stupid about family," Nie Huaisang said, starting to pace the room. "But your uncle should have known better, and me as well. Qin Cangye is a proud man, and he’s refused to believe what was revealed about his wife. Of course he’d do something if he learned Rusong is alive!”

Nie Huaisang stopped his pacing, and cursed. That was another reason he’d worked alone all these years. He was too sentimental. Having people he loved close-by made him distracted and stupid. If Jin Rusong hadn’t been living with him, Nie Huaisang would have been less emotional in the instance of a disappearance, and might have guessed right away that the Qin sect could be involved. If Lan Xichen hadn’t been there, he wouldn’t have been so careless. Emotions made him weaker, and impulsive to the point of stupidity.

“Qin Cangye is an honest man,” Lan Xichen softly pointed out. “He rarely visited Jinlin Tai because he had a dislike of Jin Guangyao, but I think he was very fond of his grandson. If he has Rusong, at least we know he’s safe.”

“Qin Cangye is a decent enough man, but we can’t be sure he’s the one who orchestrated this,” Nie Huaisang retorted. “His sons might be less than enthusiastic at the news that Jin Rusong is alive. They'd have preferred to see him dead rather than have a living proof of their mother's shame. And if his grandfather insists on treating him as family, then he’ll get a share of inheritance someday. After such a miracle, he might even get preferential treatment over Qin Cangye’s other grandchildren, just because he had the good luck to survive. The Qin sect can be just as cut-throat as Lanling Jin when there’s money involved.”

“I’m right here!” Jin Ling complained.

Nie Huaisang turned to glare at him.

“You are, and I’m furious at you! You should have told me Jin Yixin was related to the Qin!”

“I didn’t think it mattered.”

“You didn’t think at all!” Nie Huaisang exploded. “You didn’t think when you decided to heal Jin Rusong and revive him! You didn’t think when you let him wake up among strangers, without a single familiar face to comfort him! You didn’t think when you sent him here, and you certainly didn’t think when you trusted that woman! And now Rusong could be in danger, he could come to great harm, he could die again, and I… I can’t… If I have to bury him again…”

A loud sob wracked through his body, leaving him breathless. He could still see Jin Rusong, lifeless and forced to die alone, still see his tomb so small and plain for having died too young. He’d burned incense for that child, and paper toys as well so he wouldn't get bored in the afterlife. He’d pitied Jin Guangyao when he’d thought it impossible to ever do that again, before hating him with renewed passion when he’d thought the man had killed his son. He’d missed Jin Rusong, and if he had to start missing him again…

Nie Huaisang hadn’t even realised that he’d fallen to his knees, not until Lan Xichen came to sit next to him and pulled him in his arms, holding him too tight.

“Nothing will happen to him this time,” Lan Xichen said while Nie Huaisang sobbed against his shoulder. “We’re going to make sure he’s safe, all of us. Do you hear me?” 

Nie Huaisang managed to nod, his tears already calming thanks to Lan Xichen’s soothing presence.

“You and Jin zongzhu are going to Laoling,” Lan Xichen continued. “If I were better, I’d go too, but there’s too much risk that I’ll be unwell and create more problems. So I’ll stay here, and help Nie Funyu if some news reach us, or if Wen Qiongling finds something.”

He paused, and looked at the two young men standing near them.

“Sizhui, how tired are you?”

“I can fly with them to Laoling, zongzhu,” Lan Sizhui immediately replied.

“And if I ask you to go to Yunmeng?” Lan Xichen asked. “I understand that Jiang Wanyin considers himself involved in the wellbeing of Jin Rusong, so he should be told what has happened. If nothing else, his reputation might scare the kidnappers into returning him to us. Everyone knows it is unwise to cross Sandu Shengshou, and he's sure to make a racket once he's aware of this.”

Lan Sizhui sighed at that request, clearly tired by his overnight trip to Lanling, but still nodded and bowed to his sect leader. Calming down at last, Nie Huaisang felt some pity for the young man, and some amount of doubt as well.

"I can send one of my disciples," he offered. “I'm sure I can find a fast flyer.”

"Is there anyone you trust enough for such a mission?" Lan Xichen countered. "Aside from Nie Funyu, who will need to hold the fort while you're gone?" 

"No, I suppose not." 

"I trust Lan Sizhui, and Jiang zongzhu knows him and will listen to him. Can that be enough for you?" 

It wasn't, not quite. Lan Xichen's trust had been misplaced before. But that Lan Sizhui boy was also dear to Lan Wangji, who wouldn't have wasted his affection on someone who wasn't righteous. 

Besides, Nie Huaisang didn't think that Jiang Cheng could be all that helpful, so ultimately it didn't really matter. 

"Fine, send him to Yunmeng," Nie Huaisang agreed, feeling guilty that he wasn't more trusting. But if Lan Xichen noticed his lack of enthusiasm, he said nothing, apparently satisfied that Nie Huaisang would allow this at all. 

With this course of action decided, things moved fast. Nie Funyu was informed of everything, while a light collation was served to everyone. As soon as they were done eating, Jin Rulan and Nie Huaisang left together in direction of Laoling, only taking a pair of Nie disciples with them in case it came to a fight. 

It felt like a longer flight than it was. Nobody would speak, Jin Rulan because he was tired, Nie Huaisang because even something this simple required great focus on his part. 

For once, his low cultivation was on his side. If he'd been able to fly his sabre more easily, Nie Huaisang's thoughts would have drifted to dark memories and pointless worries. Even like that, unwanted images of Jin Rusong's corpse, of the child alone and terrified, still plagued him and threatened to break his concentration more than once. 

When at last they approached the home of Laoling Qin, Nie Huaisang suggested that they try to fly over the sect's dwellings to see if they spotted anything unusual. It was a breach of decorum to spy that way, but Nie Huaisang had learned to be polite only when it suited him, and Jin Rulan was easily convinced. In spite of the errors the young man had made in this whole affair, Nie Huaisang found himself thinking that he liked Jin Rulan, if only because they both loved Jin Rusong. 

When they flew over Laoling Qin, Nie Huaisang did not expect to see much. It would have been foolish to kidnap Jin Rusong and let him wander around for all to see. If it had been him doing this, he'd have taken the little boy somewhere secluded, at least for a few days. If it had been him... And yet when Jin Rulan cried out and pointed down at a tiny shape far below them, Nie Huaisang nearly fainted when he too noticed a small dark green shape among all those wearing Qin colours. 

Without thinking, Nie Huaisang angled his sabre down, descending toward the inner courtyard of that house at greater speed than was wise for such a weak flyer. He only barely managed to avoid crashing and stumbled off his sabre without grace, while Jin Rulan landed just behind him with far more control. 

Around them, a number of Qin disciples, after recovering from the surprise of that intrusion, drew their swords, ready for a fight. Nie Huaisang paid them no mind, all his attention on three figures ahead of him. One was a man well into his seventies, though excellent cultivation made him look barely any older than Nie Huaisang, who looked more annoyed than surprised or angry at this invasion. Next to Qin Cangye stood Jin Yixin, who had changed out of the Jin robes she'd worn during her stay in the Unclean Realm, now favouring Qin colours. And half hidden behind her legs was Jin Rusong, an expression of terror on his face. 

Seeing the little boy so scared, Nie Huaisang acted without thinking. He took one step toward the child, determined to scoop him up in his arms and take him home. But seeing him approach, Jin Rusong clung harder to Jin Yixin's legs, and screamed. 

“Don’t!” Jin Rusong cried out. “I don’t want to see you! You’re bad, uncle Nie! You’re bad and you killed mommy and daddy!”

[squeamishdionysus]

Healer

pairing: Jet x Reader

TW: Heavy injury, near-death experience, discussions of trauma

Summary: The Freedom Fighters take Jet to a family of healers after his fight with Long Feng, where he begins a new friendship with the reader.

Notes: Hey everyone!! This was a request for a user on another platform who wanted a Jet x Reader. After many, many rewrites, I finally settled on making a two-parter, with this being the first part! I hope you like it and if you do, please feel free to leave a comment!!!

Masterlist

The sun had just risen over Ba Sing Se. The sky was an orange tint with only a few clouds in sight, the kind of day that always puts you in a good mood. You had opened the curtains wide, letting streams of sunlight fall into your living room, warming and brightening the space. You put a teapot full of hot water on top of the pot stand, using your spark rocks to begin heating it. Your parents hadn’t woken up yet, and you didn’t plan on waking them up any time soon.

You were the child of a mixed couple, with your mother being a refugee from the Northern Water Tribe and your father being a local in Ba Sing Se. Your mother moved to Ba Sing Se a long time ago, after the man she was originally arranged to marry died fighting in the war. Being a waterbender and a healer, she became very popular among the locals, opening her clinic in the Middle Ring, where she healed anyone who needed it. That’s how she met your father.

Eventually, of course, they had you, and as fate would have it, you were a healer and waterbender, as well. Your mother taught you as much as she could, and as soon as you were old enough, you began helping her. Even with your help, though, business could still be tiring. That was why you were letting them sleep.

You sprinkled a few jade tea leaves into the water, looking out the window and watching the houses around you begin to wake up. Your neighbor, Mrs Yao, was out watering the flowers in her garden. A few stray cats sat out in the alleyway, their tails swaying patiently as a boy, the son of one of the other neighbor’s, left out a saucer of milk for them. A newlywed couple kissed each other goodbye as one of them began her commute to work, the other bouncing a small baby on her hip. A group of children chased each other down the street, giggling and playing as they slowly made their way to school.

It was rare you got to see such a scenic morning. Perhaps you would take a walk after breakfast, just to enjoy it a little more. The gardens around this area were always nice to walk through, and you were sure they’d be even nicer with the weather.

You continued looking out the window, thinking about all the ways you could enjoy this fine morning, eventually having to check on the tea. You took it off its stand, putting out the fire and pouring yourself a cup. You sighed, holding the cup up to your lips and breathing in the scent of hot tea. Jade had always been a favorite of yours

A sharp, urgent knock rang out, startling you. You couldn’t think of anybody who would be visiting this early, so you hurried over to the door. You opened it just enough to peek out and felt your heart drop. You felt panic wash over your body, the scenic morning turning all the more grim.

In front of your house stood two people, a boy and a girl, holding up an unconscious and seriously injured boy in their arms. The girl had clearly been crying, the paint on her face was smudged and you could tell just from the expression of the boy helping her that whatever had happened was not good. As for the boy they were carrying, he didn’t look good at all. His eyes were shut, he couldn’t stand and he could barely breathe.

“Please,” the girl spoke, desperation in her voice. “Our friend was attacked by an earthbender. We heard a healer lives here and we need to see her.”

You stammered, struggling to think. Panic was setting in, and you couldn’t get out a single sound. You didn’t know what to do, but you’d have to figure it out. You took a deep breath in, clearing your mind and beginning to think. Stepping to the side, you began to speak.

“Get in, go to the hall and find the guest bedroom. Lay your friend down on the bed in there.”

You watched as they entered the house, rushing down the hall of your house and into the guest room. You turned to the basin that sat in your kitchen, holding up your arms and bending a round bubble of water. You walked as briskly as you could to the guest room, walking in and kneeling beside the boy. You bent the water over his chest, feeling all of the broken and bruised ribs he had. You frowned.

“This doesn’t look good,” you said. Out of the corner of your eye, you could see the girl fighting back another stream of tears. The boy beside her hung his head just enough so that you couldn’t see his face. You stared down at the injured boy in front of you, looking at his face. His eyes were still closed shut, his breathing short and tense, but steadier now that he was on his back. What were you going to do? You could try and heal him on your own, but it would be incredibly difficult, especially at your apprentice level. It was unlikely he’d live. There was only one thing you could think to do.

You bent the water into a nearby vase, standing and furrowing your brow in a serious expression.

“I need you two to take off everything covering his chest. It’s the only way I’ll be able to heal him effectively.”

They both looked up at you, a hopeful look coming across their faces.

“I need to get my mother.”

~

“These injuries are serious. What happened to him?” your mother asked, looking up at the Smellerbee and Longshot. They had told you their names after your mother and you had begun your healing session with their friend, Jet. You had woken up your parents half an hour ago and explained the situation, your mother immediately going to help. Your father was currently making a special medicinal tea in the kitchen, hoping it would be of help to Jet.

“It’s a long story,” Longshot answered. “And even if we had enough time to explain, we aren’t in a safe enough position to say.”

Your stomach tightened. Were they involved with some kind of gang? That would explain their clothes and face paint, but they seemed too friendly to be in one. However, that didn’t dismiss the idea that they could’ve just been targets. Either way, you were worried.

Your mother nodded. “I understand. I won’t pry any further. How about you tell us more about yourselves?”

Your father walked in, a soft smile on his face as he placed a tray of tea down.

“Jet, Longshot and I have been together for a long time,” Smellerbee spoke. “Before we came to Ba Sing Se, we lived in the woods around a small village that had been taken over by the Fire Nation. We stuck together because the Fire Nation had taken something away from all of us. Both Jet and I lost our families, and Longshot's village was burned to the ground."

Your father gave her a sympathetic look as he handed her a cup of tea. “I’m so sorry. I lost my father when I was about your age. It’s something nobody should ever have to go through, especially a child.”

Smellerbee gave him a soft smile. “Thank you, sir. It was alright in the end. We formed a group called the Freedom Fighters, where we would fight back against the troops in our area and help people who had been hurt by them.”

You were impressed and intrigued, hanging off of every word she said. “That all sounds so exciting!”

She nodded. “It was. For a while, at least. We even got to meet the Avatar at some point.”

You gasped softly, looking up from the boy below you with wide eyes. “The Avatar?”

“Yes,” Longshot answered. “Unfortunately, it wasn’t under the best circumstances. The Freedom Fighters had become more about revenge than helping the Earth Kingdom. We made a horrible mistake that almost cost the lives of an entire village.”

Seeing the previous awe on your face beginning to sink, Smellerbee quickly interjected, “but we’re not like that anymore. We came to Ba Sing Se for a fresh start to move on from our past mistakes. Unfortunately, Jet had a harder time letting go than we did and got himself arrested for attacking a tea shop worker who he thought was a firebender.”

Your mother frowned, the water underneath her hands continuing to flow over Jet’s chest.

“I had a horrible feeling the Dai Li had something to do with this,” she sighed. Your father gave Smellerbee and Longshot a smile.

“And please know that we don’t judge you for your past. You have all been through so much, and it is completely justified that you feel anger towards the Fire Nation.”

You nodded, the conversation ending there as you began to focus intensely on healing Jet. You could feel the bruises and broken ribs in his chest slowly begin to heal, and his breathing was becoming more and more steady. You were grateful the group had managed to find you and your mother in time before any of his injuries could get any worse. If they had waited any longer, you probably wouldn’t have been able to make this much progress.

About an hour later, you and your mother had managed to heal Jet enough that he would be stable on his own; his chest was still injured, but not lethally, and when he’d eventually wake up, he’d be able to breathe, talk and eat normally.

Your mother grabbed a towel and wiped her hands, smiling softly at Smellerbee and Longshot. “Jet is going to have to stay with us for a few weeks, just to make sure he heals completely. He’s not quite ready to be walking all around Ba Sing Se just yet.”

Smellerbee smiled brightly. “That’s great! How much do we owe you?

Your mother chuckled, shaking her head. “No, no, you don’t need to worry about that. Just worry about taking care of yourselves. Just make sure you visit at least once a week. That should be enough.”

Longshot bowed his head. Though his expression was blank, you could see the grateful glimmer in his eyes.

Smellerbee stood, Longshot doing the same. "Thank you so much. We'll be sure to come back and check on him tomorrow."

Your father walked with them to lead them out of the house and to possibly offer them some food. You looked back at your mother.

"What now?"

She sighed, looking down at Jet with her brow furrowed. "We're just going to have to do regular healing sessions and keep an eye on him until he wakes up. That's the best we can do for now."

You nodded and let your eyes fall on his face yet again, relaxing at the sight of him peacefully sleeping. The pain must have been subdued with your healing. You could finally take a breath and feel good that you had helped a little bit.

You stood and wiped your hands on your clothes, walking towards the door. You needed to eat something, as that healing session was quite draining. Perhaps you still had some good peaches.

You looked back at Jet one last time. He looked quite handsome when he wasn't in pain.

~

The light from the window to the side was practically blinding to Jet, his vision blurry as he tried to open his eyes. It took a while for his vision to focus enough for him to get a good look at where he was. The room was a lot different than what he was accustomed to. The walls were nice, much nicer than what you’d be able to find in the Lower Ring, and there was a landscape painting hung up on the wall directly in front of him. The mat he was lying on was a lot more comfortable than he was used to, and the sheets were made with some high-quality fabric. He had no memory of ever being here before. The last thing he really could remember was excruciating pain in his chest.

Right. He had that fight with Long Feng and had his chest crushed. The Avatar’s friends were there, as well as Smellerbee and Longshot. He must’ve blacked out some time after Aang left because he couldn’t seem to remember anything after that.

He tried to sit up, groaning as he moved his fatigued body for what seemed to be the first time in days. His chest didn’t hurt as bad as he recalled, but it was still very sore. He had to keep his back somewhat straight otherwise it hurt to breathe, not to mention his head was killing him. Overall, Jet was not comfortable in the slightest, and he still had no idea where he was.

When the pain toned down enough for him to be able to think and focus, he tried to observe his surroundings. He had already determined that he was most likely in the Middle or Upper ring, given how nice the interior was. There was a large vase beside his bedding, one he figured was filled with water. Other than that, not much was going on decorating wise.

He looked down at the sheets that covered his chest, hesitantly pulling them down to see the damage Long Feng had done to his chest. He winced. Large purple bruises were scattered across his chest. They weren’t severe, at least not as severe as he was thinking, but there were a lot and they were very sensitive. His mind went back to the feeling of being struck with the rock. It was horrible and it felt like it completely collapsed. The more Jet thought about it, the more it occurred to him that it was only a miracle that he wasn’t dead.

“Oh, great!”

Jet’s eyes immediately darted up to the doorway, just as a stranger walked into the room holding a tray of tea.

You gave him a smile, kneeling beside him and placing the tray down.

“Mother told me you’d be awake by now.”

Your voice was soft and reassuring, but Jet still eyed you with caution.

“Where am I?” he asked, his voice hoarse from going so long without use.

You took a cup of tea from the tray and handed it to him, smiling.

“You’re in my house Jet. Your friends, Smellerbee and Longshot, brought you in here a few days ago, because you were attacked. My mother and I are healers, so we’ve been taking care of you for a bit.”

He hummed, taking the tea from your hand and watching the steam rise from it. You shifted slightly, moving your feet from under you and crossing your legs.

“I’m sorry if you’re not a fan of jade tea, it was the only kind we had.”

Jet gave you a small smile of reassurance.

“It’s alright. I don’t drink tea often enough to have a favorite anyway.”

He took a sip of it, a sudden insatiable thirst awakening inside him the moment the tea touched his tongue. It had only just occurred to him how long he had gone without water, or food for that matter. He tilted his head back, chugging the tea until there wasn’t a drop left in the cup. He took a deep breath, looking back over at you, suddenly wide awake.

“How long was I out?” he exclaimed, panic in his voice.

“About a few days,” you said, handing him another cup that was on the tray. “And I wouldn’t call it ‘out.’ You were in and out of consciousness all day yesterday. I was able to make you drink a little water here and there, but not a lot.”

By the time you were finished talking, he was already done with his second cup, tea dribbling down his chin.

“Where are Smellerbee and Longshot?” He asked, wiping his face with his wrist.

“I don’t know, to be honest. They never told us where they lived.”

“And where’s your mother?”

You took a pause, pursing your lips together silently. You reached out and gently touched his chest, pushing him back a bit.

“Please lay back down. There’s a lot I have to tell you.”

He hesitated, giving you a questioning look, before slowly laying flat on the bed.

“Can you tell me your name?” he asked.

You gave him a smile and nodded, whispering your name to him as you raised your hands and looked towards the vase in the corner. You began to move them in slow patterns, water bending out of the vase and over to where he lay.

“Move the sheet out of the way so I can begin healing your chest,” you said, clear and stern.

He did as you asked, pulling the sheets out of the way to reveal his bruised abdomen. You smiled and muttered a small thank you, before bending the water over his wounds. The water began to glow dimly and left a cool sensation on Jet’s wounds. He hissed slightly, feeling the water begin to heal his wounds.

“You know,” he said raspily. “I’ve actually met another healer before.”

“Really?”

“Yeah… her name was Katara.”

You grinned. “Katara’s a beautiful name. What tribe was she from?”

“She and her brother were from the Southern Water Tribe. She was the only waterbender they had.”

You hummed, recalling what your mother had said about the Southern Water tribe.

“I assumed so. My mother told me that the Fire Nation captured all of the South’s waterbenders. I guess they missed one."

“Must’ve. She was travelling with her brother and the Avatar to the North when I first met her.”

You grinned excitedly, perking up at the mention of the Avatar.

“Your friends mentioned you had a run-in with the Avatar!” you beamed, continuing to heal him. “Tell me, what was he like?"

“He was a great kid. Friendly and always eager to help. He can be a bit naive, but he’s gotten smarter since I last saw him. I’ve run into him two separate times.”

“Weren’t you with him when you got attacked?”

His face fell a bit, his brow furrowing as he averted his eyes from you.

“Yeah. I was helping him find his bison.”

His tone was cold and distant, a total one-eighty from a few moments ago. You bit your lip softly and turned your head towards him.

“How did you get attacked, if you don’t mind me asking?”

He sighed, looking back up at you with a slight smile.

“How much time do you have?”

You grinned.

“All the time in the world.”

[skold]

alright time to roast chris’s astrological chart

let’s fuckin go

read more for length

sun in libra - your sun sign is basically your outward personality. ur sense of self. libra suns value fairness and balance and harmony over most other things. tend to put a lot of thought into the things they do. sincere, honest, decent. intolerant of general asshole behavior and those who treat others like shit. a STRONG sense of aesthetic and artistry, prone to becoming artists of some sort.

moon in aries - moon is more yr internal self. a lot of folks relate more to their moon sign bc it’s how we feel about ourselves. aries moons can be hotheaded and impulsive. they rush through things and hate uncertainty. can give off just really intense energy in general, but most fire moons do.

mercury in scorpio - mercury rules communication and interpersonal interaction and oooooh lord does scorpio in mercury want revenge. they’re emotional and unstable in their communication. tend to like art and mysticism and psychology. can see right the fuck through people. you cannot bullshit a scorpio mercury. 

venus in scorpio - venus is basically yr love language planet. rules love and sex and also generally what you find pleasurable in life. venus in scorpio people have intense sexual energy and are generally expressive of their sexuality. they’re often the “impossible to resist” type. they love desperately and deeply. good at getting others to do what they want. have a deep sense for other folks emotions and desires.

mars in aquarius - mars is the planet of action. it’s about energy and drive - any kind of drive, be it sex drive or ambition or goal setting or work ethic. mars in aquarius folks want to be fuckin weirdos. they’re the type of people who stand out both in appearance and their energy. care a lot about enacting societal change and fighting some sort of “system”, be it society or a repressive family or certain stereotypes.

jupiter in pisces - jupiter is about growth and expansion. how we self actualize. it’s also sometimes associated with luck and fortune. jupiter in pisces natives are super friendly. hospitable and charitable types. want to look after other people. super sensitive and intuitive. good at “reading the room” so to say. often distrustful and suspicious of the motivations of others.

saturn in sagittarius - big daddy saturn is an asshole. rules over restriction and order and also ones growth over time. saturn will hurt your feelings to teach you a goddamn lesson if you fuck around. these people tend to reject organized religion and form their own set of morals. they worry about problems too much to the point of inaction. they lack the sort of trust that others love and care for and value them, and will basically always go through life feeling unsupported and like they can only rely on themselves.

uranus in sagittarius - uranus is such a slow planet to orbit it doesn’t move sign alignments very often and remains in the same sign for years and influences an entire generation. rules individuality and revolution. uranus in sag folks crave progress and accomplishment. they see others as equals and fight against xenophobia and general bigotry. generally optimistic.

neptune in capricorn - neptune is also a super slow planet so it influences an entire generation. it rules spirituality and fantasy/imagination. this placement often means a strong determination to meet goals and they have a desire for perfection.

pluto in scorpio - the slowest of planets and the ruler of power and transformation. if you’re reading this you likely have this placement!! most millennials do. these natives have the ability to reinvent themselves. prolific and capable. often into the occult. use their sexuality as a source of personal power.

so that’s the planets, now here’s some other astrological points

north node in aries, south node in libra - the nodes are mathematical points opposite each other in the chart. south node indicates your comfort zone and north node indicates what somebody wants out of life and has to go out of said comfort zone for. these folks have a lot of internal conflict. they have trouble balancing things in their life and have basically zero concept of moderation. tend to bend over backwards for others and suck at setting boundaries.

lilith in gemini - lilith is a fictional point opposite the actual moon. in mythology, lilith refused to submit to adam, rejected the world of adam & eve and decided to go chill with satan instead. and if you ask me lilith did nothing wrong, but that’s a whole other post. lilith in gemini folks are constantly searching for their sense of self. they’re constantly changing and can feel like they don’t know themselves. they do not take things seriously because they feel other things and people can change as easily as they can, which is fundamentally untrue, but difficult for them to understand. make friends easily and like to meet people from other places. ymmv but some folks believe lilith placement can indicate what health issues someone may have, and gemini lilith people are believed to be particularly vulnerable to respiratory infections and injuries to the arms/hands.

chiron in gemini - chiron is an asteroid btwn saturn and uranus. in mythology, chiron was an immortal centaur who was a healer and a teacher. he was injured by a poisonous arrow by heracles and it should have killed him but due to his immortality, he was suffering in excruciating pain but couldn’t die. he gave his immortality for prometheus and upon being sent to the underworld, zeus showed mercy on him and raised him up into the heavens as a celestial body. chiron symbolizes unhealable trauma but can also indicate how one can accept their suffering and move forward. these people feel that they are constantly being misunderstood. they either feel that nobody listens to them, or that people misunderstand what they meant, or even that no one wants to understand them. but the more a chiron in gemini placement tries to correct this misunderstanding, the more it may hurt them.

now here’s some of his aspects, which is just how certain planets align in the chart and interact with each other. there’s gonna be specific astrology words here that i simply do not have the brain to explain right now, but it’s not important really, just there for the folks who do know astrology and want to know what some of his aspects are. i’m not going to include all of them cuz that’d take forever but here’s some notable ones

sun opposite moon - emotions and feelings of the moon are the opposites of the ego and individuality of the sun. this can occasionally cause conflicts, especially in relationships between close family members - parents and children or with significant others.

sun sextile uranus - brings conventionality and independence. creative dynamics and independent creativity. they like to work on projects that benefit their society. idealistic, progressive, intuitive, original. they have the need to be different and they want to show their uniqueness. 

moon trine uranus - need for considerable emotional independence and freedom. often lead unconventional lives and they do not like to yield to the will of others. feel separated from society. often experience stormy emotions and mood swings.

mercury conjunction uranus - good manners and mental balance. can express themselves well and are convincing. their views are also well balanced. their thinking is often so rational that they are not able to express their feelings too openly. 

mars sextile saturn - can work without getting tired. careful and consistent. excellent organizational skills. they like stability and security, and they do not like to take risks. can easily deal with challenges and obstacles.

mars square pluto - this aspect is challenging because these people are stubborn and determined, so they often hurt other people´s feelings with their sharp judgment and their decisiveness can often lead to big life changes

and anyway chris continues to be the person most loudly Their Chart out of all the folks whom i have ever read their charts.

[skellebonez]

Monkie Kid Headcanons Part 2: Red Son and Demon Bull Family Backstory

Follow up to this post, with a lot more heavy thinking needed this time. Since these characters technically had backstories in Journey to the West, I wanted to really think over how to work those into what we have in the show (even though it kinda doesn’t 100% work and is really messy if you overthink it since the show throws some stuff to the wayside). This took me multiple days to work out so I hope it at least makes sense.

Warning: This one actually gets very VERY dark with emotional and psychological abuse detailed in the later half, so I am putting all of these under a read more. Seriously. I want you to be aware of this before you click that button. Do not ignore this warning please.

I PROMISE that part 3 will be a lot less heavy. I just wanted to get this out so I could finally move on from it.

First, gonna preface this with the fact we all know Monkie Kid is not 100% accurate to Journey to the West. Characters that are supposed to be dead are alive after all, and Red Son’s existence in the show itself in particular kinda makes no sense when I overthink about him. Red Boy is evil in his first appearance, but comes back redeemed way later in the novel (and with his name changed to that of an actual deity who had already existed outside of JTTW with a completely different backstory).

In reality, JTTW is fiction based on historical events and Monkie Kid is made to be a kid’s show and was never going to be accurate to the novel. Not even adaptations of JTTW are. So basically, I headcanon this: in the show, JTTW the novel exists as a highly accurate and very important piece of historical novelization (a non-fiction novel). But like most examples of real non-fiction novels (like Truman Capote’s In Cold Blood), it is not entirely accurate and there are bits and pieces that do not line up. It is, however, incredibly close to 98% accuracy and anyone in it who reads it is impressed.

That being said, Red Son did study with Guanyin for quite a few years (though he was not entirely redeemed like his book counterpart, he was getting there). He actually did learn a lot and was pretty darn happy to be under her teaching at the time. Mostly because he didn’t know what was going on outside...

Unfortunately, later portions of JTTW confirm that Red Son being taken... completely ruined Monkey King and Demon Bull King’s friendly relationship. So that, combined with other events in the Fiery Mountains, it is incredibly likely that is why DBK was so bent on ruling and taking out Wukong for good. He wanted revenge for a lot of stuff Monkey King did.

Before we get into the depressing stuff, I personally headcanon that DBK was actually just. Dead. Completely dead. That is why he went from being covered in floof to being big buff body builder man. Hair does not grow back when you are dead. Removing the staff completely revived him. I needed a silly weird headcanon in here ok?

Since Princess Iron Fan calls him her husband, not her ex-husband as he had divorced her to be with Princess Jade Face in JTTW, I think they either reconciled at some point or PJF... didn’t exist? Since LMK is a kid’s show the later is more likely... but this is my headcanon. Given her personality in the show and book I think it is possible that they mutually divorced due to losing Red Son, DBK remarried, then realized he still loved PIF and wanted to go back to her and she took him back.

We don’t actually know much about PJF so... uh... I like to think she was shockingly chill about it and is just living comfortably somewhere else now. And never wants to see Monkey King again. I hope she is living her best fox spirit life.

Also unfortunately, DBK did not stand a chance and when he was sealed it took a major toll on PIF. She was left alone, her renewed husband either trapped or dead under a mountain and her son kinda sorta still arrested by a deity. This made her more distant to everyone and a lot more cold.

When news of what happened to his father reached Red Son, he pleaded with Guanyin to be allowed to leave her teaching to stay with his mother. He knew what isolation felt like and did not wish for her to feel the same any longer. Guanyin trusted her disciple and allowed him to return to his mother permanently, if he desired. Alone.

This was a mistake. Oh boy was this a mistake. Heaven should have either sent someone else completely or had someone accompany Red Son to PIF to help her because this one decision is why everything in show happens.

At first things go pretty well. PIF is definitely in need of support, but she is ecstatic to see her son again. And that lasts. For a while. Until she starts to project onto Red. She starts to blame him for being captured, for not being strong enough to take out Wukong when he had the True Samadhi Fire, for not being there to keep DBK from leaving her, for not being there to help his father fight Wukong a second time. Everything is Red Son’s fault now.

This simmers for a while before it starts to come forth to the surface. She starts being colder and more distant and giving Red little jabs in their conversations. She says them so sweetly it always takes Red a second to register what she says. 

“Oh Red Son, if only your father were here to see this. Too bad you weren’t there to save him.” “I love you my son, even if you can be useless at times.” “Princess Jade Face would have loved you I bet, but you were far too busy with the celestials to visit. I understand.”

This starts to wear Red down after a while, until he starts to believe his mother. He WASN’T there when he father was defeated, he COULD have taken care of Wukong, he WAS the reason his father left his mother. She was as warm and loving to him as she was when he was a small child when he came back but now? Now she’s as cold to him as anyone else.

She is never outright physically abusive, that is below her in her mind. But other things? Like not having his meals prepared along side hers? Insulting him as casually as saying the sky is blue? Pointing out every mistake he makes when writing or working on a project? Taking his things and “losing” them, only to “find” them days later in a place she told him to look and telling him he needs to be more careful? “Mistakenly” locking Red Son in his room and ignoring his yells and pleas to be let out? Those are on the table.

And this is when he becomes obsessed with getting back in her good graces and starts to push aside his teachings from Guanyin. He just wants his mother back.

His mother does not come back... but his old self does.

Guanyin does not learn of this until long after it is impossible to convince Red Son to leave his mother. She has the kneejerk reaction to just take him back by force but... for some reason she does not. She lets him stay. Perhaps she does not want to make the wrong decision again. Perhaps she feels she taught him everything she could. No one really knows. She does not discuss this.

After a while PIF does lessen her emotional and psychological abuse, once she is certain Red Son will never leave her. She even starts to treat him nicely, like her son who she always loved, like a mother again, even praises and defends him from others again (and Red Son eats it up because this is exactly what he wanted and just fuels his determination to prove himself and stay in her good graces). And at the time the show begins she has come to terms with the fact Red Son was not, in fact, at fault for anything and even regrets this portion of her life.

Make no mistake, however, her treating him less bad, even well at times, now does NOT in any way absolve her of how she treated him in the past. She is still abusive and she has done nothing that could truly set anything right. She still calls him things like “her sweet useless boy” and pulls shit like the racing episode. It’s not really any better. It’s just not actively as bad as it used to be at the moment.

DBK in show did not notice how PIF had changed because in the pilot he was too distracted with being revived and as the show went on he was too distracted with the power of the White Bone Spirit calling to him.

Upon a rewatch he actually seems to be under WBS’s thrall multiple times before episode 10, such as the racing episode where we can clearly see his eyes glowing with possession blue, and I think this affected his personality a bit. Not much, I think he was still neglectful and cold to Red Son from the get go, but WBS probably exacerbated the worst parts of his personality long before taking over completely.

But I think he sure does notice NOW that the thrall no longer has him. Whether or not he does anything about this is up in the air, however. It is entirely possible he falls fully into neglect and does nothing to stop anything.

Red Son knows, very deep down, that his father is neglectful and his mother is abusive. He knows. He just won’t admit that not even demons are like this to their children. Won’t admit that he doesn’t deserve it, that he never deserved it. Because he loved his mother deeply before he left. He loved her when she convinced him he did. And he still loves her, and his father. He’s stubborn. He doesn’t want to give up on that.

It is going to take a LOT for someone to show him that he deserves better. But having his father back has not been everything he had hoped it would be and now... now it may be possible for someone to reach him. At least convince him that SOMETHING needs to change.

[honeypiehotchner]

i knew you (Bucky Barnes soulmate AU) -- part six

I keep forgetting to post this story OOPS

Warnings: panic, general self-deprecating thoughts, unrequited love thoughts, maybe slightly ooc!Tony, I think that’s all

Sam, Steve, and who you learn to be T’Challa, now King of Wakanda after his father died in the bombing at Vienna -- which makes his obsession with clawing Bucky’s eyes out make much more sense -- are shoved in a vehicle alongside you.

You have no idea what they did with Bucky -- other than he’s still alive -- and you have no fucking clue where you’re going, but the ride is long. Too long to be in a car with Sam and Steve, especially with Sam trying every second he can to get on T’Challa’s nerves.

“So you like cats?”

“Shut up, Sam, please, for once in your life,” you groan from your spot next to him.

Even Steve gives him a look.

“What? Dude shows up dressed like a cat and you don’t wanna know more?” Sam asks.

“Your suit…” Steve narrows his eyes. “It’s vibranium?”

“What is that?”

You don’t get an answer.

“The Black Panther has been the protector of Wakanda for generations. A mantle, passed from warrior to warrior. And now, because your friend murdered my father, I also wear the mantle of King. So, I ask you, as both King and warrior,” T’Challa pauses. “How long do you think you can keep your friend safe from me?”

The silence is deafening.

“It wasn’t him,” you blurt, earning yourself a glare. “Laugh at me all you want, but it wasn’t Bucky that killed your father. Don’t get revenge on the wrong man.”

T’Challa turns to face forward, refusing to say another word.

You do the same, instead focusing on what Bucky is feeling. You wonder if he can feel just how pissed off and panicked you are. You’re pissed, of course, because all of this fighting wasn’t necessary. You jumped off buildings for that man, and he still insists that he doesn’t know you.

Maybe you’d be able to write it off as a dreadful miscommunication for the past decade of your life, but you can’t. Not when you can physically feel that he is lying. The tightness in his chest doesn’t lie. Neither do his eyes.

But God, you wish they could.

You turn your head to hide your quivering lip. The last thing you need is to break into a sobbing mess in the back of this vehicle with three men surrounding you — especially when one of them was just trying to kill the same soulmate you’re upset over.

You know it’s not true, but part of you does wish Bucky was dead.

It was a lot easier on you to fantasize and dream about him when you thought he was dead.

+++

The government facility in Berlin looks far more secure than anything you’ve ever seen. Having guards posted all around when the four of you step out of the vehicle almost seems like overkill. They already took your weapons, what are they expecting any of you to do?

You glance over your shoulder to see Bucky in a small container. Your heart breaks at the sight of him, being restrained and in such a tight space. But the fact that he won’t even look your way breaks your heart even more.

“What’s gonna happen to him?” Steve asks, having the courage to voice what you want to know.

“Same thing that ought to happen to you,” the man replies. He’s short and wears a gray suit. It’s hard for you to take him seriously as an authority figure when it looks like his pants need to be hemmed. “Psychological evaluation and extradition.”

You cross your arms over your chest, keeping your mouth shut. Sharon stands next to the man, but at least she looks like she’s on your side — or Steve’s, since she obviously has a thing for him.

“This is Everett Ross, Deputy Task Force Commander—” Sharon begins introducing him, but you stop her.

“A guy too big to introduce himself?” You raise an eyebrow. “Wow.”

Everett barely smiles, but it isn’t friendly. “Yeah, uh, who the hell are you?” It’s taunting, but you’re too exhausted to give in.

“No one,” you wave your hand, letting Steve keep going.

“What about a lawyer?”

Everett finds that about as amusing as your sentence. “A lawyer, that’s funny.” He turns to address Sharon. “See that their weapons are placed in lockup.” Then turning to the four of you, he says, “We’ll write you a receipt.”

As if on cue, men pass by holding Steve’s shield and uniform, Sam’s wings, and your gun and bullet proof vest. You had almost gotten away with the vest, but once they felt it, they wanted it off -- probably afraid it had some explosive inside it. So, now you’re without your protection, and you miss the weight of the vest. Something about it soothed the ache inside you.

Sam looks ready to burst at the seams. “I better not look out the window and see anybody flying around in that.”

You’re ushered forward by some guards and you go without resisting. You see Steve take one more look at Bucky, but you don’t bother. No sense in looking at someone who doesn’t want to see you, anyway.

Everett walks ahead, leading the way across a glass bridge to the other side of the facility. “You’ll be provided with an office, instead of a cell.”

“How kind,” you snort.

He ignores your comment. “Do me a favor: stay in it.”

You roll your eyes. What does he expect you guys to do? Start a fight when the ratio of unarmed super-soldier to heavily armed guards is about 1 to 1,000 in here?

Natasha joins the group, giving you a particularly cold stare before talking to Steve. “For the record, this is what making things worse looks like.”

You manage a chuckle. She has a point, after all.

“He’s alive,” Steve says matter-of-factly.

Yeah, you think. A lot of good that’s doing to everyone.

By the time you reach the other side of the bridge, you’re ready to ask T’Challa to claw your eyes out instead. You won’t even put up a fight. You’re just tired of holding these tears back and feeling this burning pressure in your chest. You don’t know if it’s yours or Bucky’s emotions at this point, all you know is that you want to be left alone.  

The weight of it all is crushing down on you now that there aren’t guns firing at you.

He doesn’t want you.

Your soulmate doesn’t want you.

Fuck.

You wipe a stray tear away, spotting Tony Stark up ahead. Tony seeing you cry is not something you ever want to happen, so you chew on the inside of your cheek instead, hoping you can slip past him quick enough that he won’t notice.

But, of course, that’s too much to ask for when you’ve got Sam and Steve next to you. And when the three of you are now criminals.

“Colonel Rhodes is supervising clean up,” Tony says to someone on the phone. But, because he’s Tony, he has to glare at the three of you while he says it. “Consequences? You bet there’ll be consequences. Obviously you can quote me on that because I just said it, anything else? Thank you sir.”

You take a deep breath, steeling yourself. Here we go.

“Consequences?” Steve inquires, very obviously not giving a damn from the sounds of his tone.

“Secretary Ross wants you prosecuted,” Tony pauses, looking pointedly at you. “All of you.”

You glare at him. “I wasn’t expecting to be an exception, if that’s what you were thinking.”

“That’s not what I was thinking,” Tony replies, always having to have the upper hand. “What I was thinking, is that when I paid for you to have top of the line combat training, I didn’t mean for you to use it on something like this.”

“For God’s sake,” you mutter under your breath, ignoring Steve and Sam’s bewildered stares. You should’ve known he’d use this moment to blast your secret to everyone.

Your training is something you kept under wraps because naturally, if someone knows you’re going to be a challenge, they normally take it. You wanted to be as off the grid and as normal appearing as you could, so you quietly trained while loudly posting about your degree and only your degree. No pictures with Sam or Steve in them when they’d come to visit. Just you or your best friend, nothing more. You wanted to appear as though you were staying out of the way of any and all affairs that could deal with The Winter Soldier. You knew you’d be left alone if you acted as if you didn’t care. You even went on random dates and posted about them. You slipped under everyone’s radar just like you wanted.

“I’m not doing this right now,” you push past Tony in search of an empty office.

“No, I think we are doing this now,” Tony pulls you back by your arm, which you wrench out of his grip immediately. “I paid for those classes so you could defend yourself, and now you’re a criminal. How do you think that makes me look?”

“I don’t know. Grab a goddamn mirror. It’ll tell you.”

Your sarcasm only fuels his anger. “Listen to me—”

“No, okay?” Your voice cracks and you hate it. You hate the way Steve has been looking at you, like you’re about to break into a million pieces right on the floor in front of everyone. You hate that Tony thinks he can just lecture you about something he has no fucking clue about how it feels. You hate that Bucky doesn’t want you and you hate that he’s in a tiny box right now and that if you never would’ve met Steve two years ago then you wouldn’t be hurting like this right now.

Tony stares quietly at you, waiting for you to finish.

So, with as much strength as you can gather, you finish. “I’ve just jumped off buildings and almost taken bullets for my soulmate who does not even want me.” You pause to let it sink in. “So, if you don’t mind, I’d really love to go cry my eyes out for thirty minutes. You can lecture me after.”

Tony’s face falls and pales a little even, but you’re too exhausted to notice.

By some stroke of bad luck, Everett Ross happens to overhear your words. His dumbfounded expression comes into view and it takes all of your leftover energy to not deck him right in the jaw.

“Did I just hear you say that you’re his soulmate?”

“No,” you snap. “Because he doesn’t know me and doesn’t want to talk to me. So, sorry, you won’t get to weaponize me today. Now, do you have an office I can cry in? Or do I need to go find it myself?”

Stunned, Everett flounders for a response. “Uh, you can just pick an empty one.”

“Great,” you swallow around the lump in your throat, keeping your eyes on the ground as you finally escape from everyone around you.

The office is glass, so it isn’t like you’re getting much privacy at all, but it’s enough. You take the farthest one, turning to face the wall so no one else has to see your pathetic tears as they stream down your face.

Saying it out loud made it real.

Bucky doesn’t want you. He doesn’t know you. He doesn’t care what you feel. He doesn’t care that you’re his soulmate. He doesn’t want any part of any of it.

Your chest feels like it might rip itself open just for your heart to escape, and part of you wishes it could. You wish you could be without your heart and this soulmate business just for one day.

All those years. Thinking he’d want you.

The past two years. Rehearsing how to talk to him. How to make it work because you weren’t foolish enough to think it’d be easy. You knew it would be hard, that he’d be troubled with his own issues. But you never thought about the possibility of him straight-up rejecting you.

All of it. For nothing. For a soulmate who insists he doesn’t know you.

You try to muffle your choked sob as best you can, but you fail, the noise only causing more tears to fall. Stupid, stupid, stupid. He was brainwashed by HYDRA and you were stupid enough to hope that he’d want you in his life, that he’d remember you.

Maybe he doesn’t remember you. Maybe when they did something to his mind, it erased all of you.

But he remembers Steve, you remind yourself, and the hurt takes over once more.

You turn and press your back to the glass, shutting your eyes so you won’t see if anyone is watching you. You know how absurd you must look. It doesn’t matter. He doesn’t want you. What does any of it matter anymore?

You slide down to the floor, burying your face in your knees. God, it hurts. It hurts and it hurts and it hurts and you want it to stop. You wish you never went to that damn exhibit with your best friend. You wish you never knew about Bucky. Living in blissful ignorance was painful, but at least you had peace alongside the pain.

At least that image of your soulmate wanted you.

+++

Back outside, Everett watches your shaking form with a newfound worry. “Is she gonna be okay?”

“I don’t know.” Tony hangs his head. “Do you need me for anything?”

Everett glances at his watch. “No, actually I’ve got things to get to.” He disappears without another word.

Tony thinks it over, wondering if he should even go check on you. You’re like a daughter to him, though he’ll never admit that to you, and you’d never suspect it. The two of you hardly speak. You were surprised when he reached out about your protection. Steve had apparently mentioned you, and Tony being Tony, knew he had the money to make you feel safe.

And he did. The classes helped. Keeping everything about you, except what you wanted people to see -- that you were an Honors student, a well-supported, intelligent young woman -- a secret helped.

The two of you bicker. You argued when you first met. Tony wanted to pay for extra security, personal security that would follow you around. He wanted to move you from the college apartments to some fancier complex where he could control the security protocols. You turned him down, asked about classes. He compromised. But not without some off-handed, pissed-off remark, that you promptly replied to with, “Fuck off.”

You’re strong, he’ll give you that. Anyone else would’ve denied their feelings, sworn they weren’t the soulmate of the fist of HYDRA. But you embraced it. You knew you couldn’t change it. You knew you would get Bucky back one day -- your Bucky.

But you never would’ve guessed that he would’ve reacted this way. Shielding you from bullets while insisting that he has no idea who the hell you are.

His insistence is what hurt you the most. You had thought when you confessed that you can feel when he’s lying, he would’ve given in. That maybe he needed a confirmation, a reason to believe it was really you, because anyone can lie. Technology -- Stark’s, at least -- has advanced, anyone can look like whoever they want. You thought Bucky needed proof. But that wasn’t it.

He just didn’t care.

Tony watches as you turn around, pressing your back to the glass. Your eyes are closed, face wet with tears and hand pressed over your mouth. You slide to the floor, and that’s the last straw.

You look up when you hear Tony knocking on the glass.

Once you see it’s him, though, you put your head back in your hands. “I said thirty minutes,” you mumble. “I know damn well it’s only been ten.”

“Just shut up and come here.”

You look up again, your expression pained as if he just slapped you. Tony frowns. He’s making it worse when he wants to make it better.

“What do you want?” You ask tiredly, rubbing both hands on your face to wipe the rest of the tears away. You sniffle loudly, grimacing at the noise. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry, just come here.”

“What do you want?”

“To give you a damn hug,” Tony mutters, invading your personal space by sitting next to you on the floor.

You accept his hug, but only for a few seconds. That’s all you can take.

“Sorry,” you murmur, shrugging him off and scooting a foot away. “Anything that touches me makes me want to punch. I don’t know if it’s him feeling that, or me, but…” You sigh. “Regardless I’d just like for this to be over.”

“You and me both, kiddo,” Tony exhales, leaning his head back against the glass. “Why did you go with Cap and Sam?”

You shrug. “If it was Pepper...wouldn’t you?”

“Pepper wasn’t brainwashed by HYDRA,” Tony says. “And Pepper didn’t assassinate dozens of people.”

“But if she had, if it was Pepper in that box right now, wouldn’t you have done anything? Even if you knew it was a losing battle?”

Tony stays quiet, thinking. “Yeah.” He nods slowly. “I would.” Then he lets out a dry laugh. “I don’t think she’d put me in that position -- I think it’s more likely the other way around.”

You look over at him, frowning.

He sees you looking and sighs, closing his eyes. “We’re taking a break.”

That explains it. “I’m sorry.”

He shakes his head. “It’s fine. In her defense, I’m a handful.” Typical Tony. Deflecting his real feelings with humor. “Anyway, I’m sorry, too. Earlier. I shouldn’t have spilled your secrets like that.”

You shrug. “It’s whatever. It’s out there now. I’m sure Everett is thinking of every way he can to somehow get through to Bucky through me.” The mention of your soulmate has tears jumping back into your eyes.

Then a wave of panic rushes over you.

Your eyes shoot open and you scramble to your feet, moving to the farthest corner of the office to get a good look at the screens. Without audio, you can’t tell much, but that doesn’t make it any better.

“What wrong?” Tony asks, joining you.

“He’s panicked,” you murmur. “Where’s Steve?”

Tony doesn’t have time to answer you before you’re practically running out of the office to find Steve. You find him with Sam and Sharon in another office.

“Steve--” You stop when you hear the audio. It’s Bucky’s voice.

“Where’s Y/N?” He says. You look at the screen, thinking your ears have deceived you, but he says it again. “Y/N, I need to talk to her.”

“What’s going on?” Steve asks, noticing the look on your face.

“Something’s wrong,” you say, shaking your head. “I don’t know what. But he’s panicking. Or maybe it’s me. Something’s wrong.”

About that time, the power goes out.

Literally. Everywhere. Emergency lights coat the room in a soft blue glow, the red of the exits the only other light working in the place.

“Fuck!” You smack the table, looking to Sharon. “Where is he?”

“Sub-level five, East wing,” she answers quickly.

You don’t look to Sam or Steve, you just start running.

The slapping of footsteps behind you is the only indication you have that they’re following you. Tears spring to your eyes as another wave of panic comes over you, nearly choking you this time. Something bad. It’s something bad.

Anger comes next, burning in your chest. What the hell is happening? That psychiatrist -- what’s he doing to your Bucky?

Then you feel it.

It spreads throughout your whole body. The old feeling you had once forgotten. Two years is long enough to get used to Bucky and forget all about The Winter Soldier, but not long enough to not recognize it when it returns.

You push forward, running as fast as you can. You slow once you’re at the correct sub-level, waiting for Sam and Steve. You hold your hands up when they come into view.

Steve comes skidding to a stop. “What?”

“He’s not Bucky right now,” you say quietly, despite the thrumming in your ears. “He’s the Soldier. We have to be careful. I don’t know what happened, but I felt it.”

“Shit,” Steve cusses. “Okay.”

Back on track, the first sign that the Soldier is here is all of the guards lying unconscious on the floor. Inside the room, the psychiatrist sent to evaluate Bucky -- though you’re suspecting he isn’t the psychiatrist -- lies in the middle of the floor, barely conscious.

Steve walks in and drags the man up off of the floor, pinning him to the wall.

You’re right. He’s not who he says he is.

While Steve is handling him, you and Steve step up to the doorway, but you pause, pressing your arm to Sam’s chest.

Shit. He’s in there.

Sam either doesn’t catch your signal or doesn’t want you walking in by yourself, because he ignores you and steps into the room. Regardless, it earns him a punch to the face that he barely dodges.

“Bucky!” You scream, pushing Sam out of the way before Bucky’s metal fist can smash his head in. “Bucky, stop!”

But he doesn’t. He keeps going after Sam, and only stops once he has thrown Sam halfway across the room into the box he was kept in. Sam falls limply to the floor, unconscious.

“Bucky, look at me,” you plead, tears pushing to the front of your eyes, but you blink them away. “You have to come out of this!”

Bucky pushes past you, going after Steve this time. Well, you think. First, he knocks the psychiatrist out cold, but you don’t mind that. What you do mind is when Bucky focuses back on Steve, choking him up against the wall.

You try to pull on his arm, but you know it’s useless. He holds you back, keeping you away from him, but still not hurting you.

You think. Quick. What would help? Why isn’t he hurting you? He’s capable of handling more than one person, and you’re obviously provoking him in some way right now as you claw at his back. But still, he isn’t hurting you. Why?

A long shot of an idea pops into your head.

“Soldier!” You raise your voice, straightening your shoulders, hoping it’ll give you the look of an authority figure. “Soldier. I said stop.”

Steve hits the ground with a thud, coughing loudly.

“Soldier,” you repeat, keeping your voice even. “Look at me.” Slowly, Bucky turns around. He’s still the Soldier, but at least he isn’t trying to kill Steve. “What are your orders?”

“You give them.”

You blink. “What?”

“Orders are to protect you,” the Soldier says. “Keep you safe.”

Your breath hitches. You push away your emotions, thinking instead how you can use his orders to your advantage right now. You don’t exactly like using him this way, but you don’t have any other option when he’s a highly trained and chemically enhanced assassin.

“Steve is a friend.” You pause, nodding to Sam who is slowly coming back to consciousness on the ground. “So is Sam. Do not hurt them. Understand?”

Firmly, Bucky nods.

You look over your shoulder at Steve. “We’ve gotta get him out of here,” you say. “They’ll kill him if they find him like this.” Regardless of the fact that he’s listening to you.

“Yeah,” Steve agrees, voice hoarse. He goes over to Sam, pulling him off the ground. He’s disoriented, but awake. “Come on. We gotta go.”

“Okay, Soldier,” you almost wince, hating talking to him like this. “Get us out of here. Can you do that?”

Again, he nods. His flesh arm wraps protectively around your waist, practically picking you up as he begins to walk.

You try your hardest to ignore the effect it has on your body, but you can’t help it. The combination of his strength and this being the most intimate way that he has touched you yet leaves you breaking out in a cold sweat.

“Wait,” you pause, and Bucky stops. “I’ll hold onto your arm,” you say, slipping his arm from around your waist. You grip his bicep, your other hand sliding into his. You hate to be doing this because you know once Bucky remembers, he’ll probably hate you even more for it. But right now, the Soldier won’t walk two inches without some sort of grip on you. “Is this better?”

The Soldier’s bicep flexes underneath your fingers. You swallow thickly. Maybe this was worse.

“As long as you’re safe,” is all he says, before continuing on.

You look back over your shoulder to find Steve watching with a sad smile.

You shove down the swelling sadness in your chest. You know this is the last time you’ll get to hold his hand, or hold onto him like this. But he can’t stay the Soldier forever. He needs to be Bucky again.

Even if Bucky is the one who doesn’t want you.

[random-mha-thoughts]

Jerk (Todoroki x Reader)

Pairing: Todoroki x Fem!Reader

@adainelartz​ asked:  “ I read your oneshots and I think they're great! I wanted to request an angst (sad or hapy end) oneshot where the reader has a fire quirk or something similar, and Shouto and Her had been classmate in elementary or middle school and people used to bully Y/n chan for thinking she could be like endeavor with her being weak or a top hero with a quirk like hers and Shouto just watches every beat ups given to y/n chan and Y/n chan decides to snap in UA and take revenge and targets to hurt Shouto most.”

Genre: Angst to slight fluff

Word count: 3,361

Tags:  @yuki-osaki​ @liviitehe​ @iamsoftsodonttoucheume-blog​ 

a/n:  I swear this was going to take a shorter amount of time to write and it was going to be a lot shorter as well.  But what can I say, I’m a writer; I write, my brain starts working, I write more, the gears turns more, what do I do, say no?  No, I keep writing.

This ending isn't the best and it feels kind of rushed, but I also didn't know how else to end it and I wanted to hurry and finish it and I already almost fell asleep sitting up at my keyboard at least twice, so I wrote the first thing that came to my head.  I hope I did your request justice, babe~ Thank you again for letting me write it~

Also, if you haven’t seen, I hit 600 followers yesterday!  Though I don’t know why you all are here, thank you for being here and sticking through my poor update schedule.  I appreciate you all.  Enjoy the story~

I hate him.

He's oblivious as I bore holes into the back of his head.  Mr. I-Got-In-On-Recommendation just sits there studying like the studious boy he is.  Everyone thinks he's so great, but I know he's no better than a bully.

"Are you okay, (Y/n)?" Jirou asks, eyeing me warily as he headphone jacks flit around.  "You need to calm down, your food's already dead."

Looking down, there were holes in my salmon from me poking at it.  "I'm fine, just thinking of something."

"You must be thinking of killing someone then," Kaminari laughs nervously, scooting an inch away from me.  "I'd hate to be on the receiving end of that."

He flinches when I smirk at him.  "You probably should be."  I'm only joking, but after Bakugou, I'm the next scariest person in 1-A.  It doesn't help that my quirk is also dangerous.

But it wasn't always that way, unfortunately.  Back in middle school, I could barely light a candle with my fire quirk, flames barely stuttering out a cold, dark red flame before collapsing on itself.  I've always been vocal about being a powerful top hero, and my quirk should've matched those ambitions.  Instead, I was a weakling.  No one believed me or took me seriously.  They laughed at me, teased me, scoffed at me, disregarded all my dreams.  But I never gave up, I kept my dreams close to me and resolved to work harder.

I tried befriending Todoroki just because I thought he could give me pointers, since he has a Fire quirk also, but he wasn't very open to making friends or talking about that half of his quirk.  In fact, he was always cold to everyone, but somehow he was still popular.  So popular that some girls in my classes berated me for getting close to him.  They were my worst bullies; just because I tried being friendly with their crush, they started teasing me about how weak I was, humiliating me in front of the class, writing nasty messages on my desk, pouring water on me.  It even got to the point where they started pulling me out after class and during lunch to beat me up.  I would be the punching bag or target of all their quirks.

"This is what a real hero fights like!  Not some puny whore like you!"

They'd growl and laugh at me, and I couldn't defend myself.  And on a few occasions, I'd see Todoroki standing a distance away as I was battered and bruised.

I didn't care that he didn't know it was because of him that I was being abused.  I was angry because he just stood there, watching as those girls beat me up and called me names.  I curse his apathy, those cold eyes as he stared right at me, met eyes with me, and chose to walk away as if nothing was happening.  Just because his quirk is already strong, he looked down on weak fools like me.  What a pompous asshole.

Months before entrance exams, I'd had enough of being a busted-up rag doll.  I trained late into the wee hours of morning, pouring over countless online guides for unleashing your quirk.  The first time I was able to sustain a bright red flame for more than 30 seconds, I almost cried in victory.  The more I trained, the more powerful and hotter my flames became, spanning from red to orange to bright yellow, even white in short bursts.  By the time the UA Entrance Exam rolled around, I'd attained incredible control over the temperature and sizes of flames I can make.  Getting into UA has been my best achievement since I worked so hard for it.

Imagine how bitter I was when I heard Todoroki got in on recommendations.

I wasn't just bitter, I was pissed.  A cold, pompous jerk like him got in just because he's known to have a really powerful quirk and his father is a Pro Hero.  He doesn't even have a hero attitude!  How can someone who doesn't even help a bully victim be a real hero?

From the first day of starting UA, I vowed to make Shouto Todoroki pay for his mistakes.

"Hey, (Y/n)?"  Kirishima places a hand on my shoulder as we walk back to our classroom.  "You went to the same junior high as Todoroki, right?"

"Yeah, why?"  I try not to visibly bristle at his name.

Shark-Teeth hesitates, trying to word his next question as delicate as possible as his features twist awkwardly.  "You two aren't very fond of each other, are you?"

"We just didn't talk," I put it bluntly.

Kiri rubs behind his neck.  "I would've thought that, you know, since you two have similar quirks you would've at least-"

"He's not a very..."  Friendly, kind, decent- "Talkative person.  He didn't really have friends in school."  I sit down in my seat and pull out my books, signalling I want to end the conversation.

Thankfully, Kirishima recognizes this, mouthing an "Okay..." before retreating to his own seat for class to begin.

.

Later that day, we're into duo teams for battle trials.  My teammate ends up being Ojiro.  At least it's not that jerk.  As Bakugou and Midoriya fight it out, we're discussing tactics in the back of the room.

"You're much better at close combat than me," I explain, "So you should go out and take on the other members while I guard the weapon.  If you need backup, I'll come out to help you."  I already anticipate how Todoroki's going to attack.  Being pitted against him is the perfect opportunity for me to get back at him.

When it's our turn, we set up inside the building near the weapon.  I tug my gloves over my long sleeves.  "Stay behind me.  Whatever happens, don't panic," I mutter as I stand near the blond's tail.

Ojiro's confused expression is about to ask me why when the entire building starts rumbling.  I activate orange fire out of my hands as the ice starts sweeping inside the room.  Typical.  At first, the ice is about to trap us, but I expand the size of the flames and sweep them over the entire inside of the room, careful not to burn the weapon.

"How did you know he would do that?" Ojiro asks, obviously impressed by my foresight.

"Instinct.  Todoroki's going to come in here thinking he's frozen us to capture the warhead.  When he does, I'll distract him while you run out and get the jump on Shoji, okay?"

As I predicted, Todoroki strolls into the room, eyebrows furrowing when he sees the room is completely rid of ice.  "What-"

I don't give him chance to react as I blow orange flames directly at him.  He puts up an ice barrier in the nick of time, my quirk completely encompassing him in heat.  I nod for my teammate to hurry, and follows my orders, slipping through the door and bouncing out a window.

You're mine, jackass.  I rush at him through the flames, heart pumping fresh rage through my veins.  He raises his arm to shoot ice at me, but I jump up above him, propelling myself with flames from my left hand and shooting from my other one at him once I'm soaring near the back of his head.  Landing right behind, I swipe his legs before he can spot me, effective in tripping him to his knee.  I kick down, sending him onto his face with a groan.  Gotcha.

Unfortunately for me, his right arm finds my ankle, sending numbing ice up my leg.  "You can't win that easily," I grit out.  I step on his free left wrist, hearing the crack under my foot, and shoot another flame blast at the ice on my leg.  Ignoring his grunts of pain, I crouch down and pin his right hand behind his back.  "And that's checkmate, Todoroki-san."

"Alright, that's enough, Young (Y/n)!"  All Might yells out through the speakers.  "The villain team has captured the hero team!"

Smirking, I shove Todoroki aside and walk away without bothering to look at him again.  "So much for someone getting into UA on recommendations," I mutter to myself.

Once I'm out of the building, Ojiro raises an eyebrow at me.  "Where's Todoroki?"

I simply shrug.  "He'll be down in a little, I guess."

Turning back around, the jerk is exiting out of the building, nursing his left wrist against his chest.  I face away quickly, just a twinge of guilt invading my mind.

"Hey, (Y/n), I think he's hurt," Ojiro's calm voice points out.

I scowl at him.  "It's just his wrist, he'll be fine," I bark, stomping off to the rest of the class.  It's not fair that I feel guilty, he deserves it!

.

"You sure there's no beef between you and Todoroki?" Kirishima asks as he walks next to me at the end of the day.

"Fuck off, Shark-Teeth!"  I'm still in a bad mood.  It's just his wrist, come on!  "One trip to Recovery Girl and he was completely fine, I don't know why everyone's so bent out of shape about it!"

"Because you didn't even help him afterwards.  That's kinda not heroic, don't you think?"

I round on him, about to grab his shirt and blast him in the face, instead choosing to clench my fists.  "You don't know what 'mean' is!  Stay out of this!"  I walk away from him without looking back, mumbling to myself.  How can he say that about me not being heroic?  If he knew what Todoroki did, he would say the same thing.

On my way to the train station, I spot that familiar mop of bicolored hair staring at me with the same neutral gaze I hate.  Glancing down, I see his wrist is fine before quickly darting away.  Pompous jerk making me feel bad.

.

After that day, this idiot always had the audacity to stare at me.  I always feel his eyes on me, it's so annoying.  And he makes it so obvious, he doesn't even look away when I catch him, he just stares at me.  It's enough that Kirishima's words got to me, I don't need him confusing me with this staring contest we have going on.  If he wants to talk to me, he should do it already.

During the next few training sessions, we began sparring against each other with our quirks.  People have slowly been becoming scared of me during these times because of how rough I was.

Once, I got to fight Bakugou.  It was really fun going all out against someone who's just as aggressive.

This time, my opponent is the jerk himself.  When Aizawa announced the pairs, Kirishima was about to pull me aside, but saw my murderous look and chose he would like to live.  Everyone around us found their partners and started their individual training.  While the two of us stared at each other from across the mat.  I want to smash his emotionless pretty face in, I hate that I don't know what he's thinking!

If he's not gonna make the first move, I will.  I rush up to him, igniting the flames in my palms.  He's ready for me this time, standing his ground as I bound up and hunkering into a fighting stance.   I throw up a hand towards his face once I close in on him, ready to blow his face off.

Todoroki catches my hand by the wrist, bringing his right hand up to trap me in an ice coffin.  I slap that hand away and explode out a burst of orange flames, making him let go and stagger a few steps back.  He immediately sends a trail of ice down to secure my feet in place, but I respond by directing both my hands downward, propelling myself off the ground and towards him in a giant, sweeping leap.

The familiar weightlessness of being in the air fuels the adrenaline pumping through me.  He's my enemy, and I'm taking him down.

As I launch more continuous blasts at him while I soaring towards him, Todoroki coats his arm with ice to block his face.  But he's in for a surprise.  Moving close enough, I drop kick his arm down before landing a punch straight in his face.  My body lands on top of his torso, pinning him to the ground.  Winding back to land another punch on him, he suddenly launches his upper body upwards, headbutting me in the nose.

I let out a pained growl, reeling back as I feel the tingling of tears pooling in the corner of my eyes, and Todoroki uses this opportunity to flip us over so he's on top.  Placing his hand on my shoulder, I'm instantly plunged into an ice coffin under him.  Heaving out an icy breath, he slowly rises to his feet.  The puckered skin of his scar already starts swelling into a bruise where I punched him, and forehead cracked from where he headbutt my nose.

The anger boils my blood hot as my flames.  He's not winning over me!  I'm not letting that happen!  With a growling scream, heat floods from my iced palms before I'm broken free from my confines.  White and blue flames erupt from my hands, directing them straight up at Todoroki.  The ice barrier he puts up to protect himself melts faster than ice cream on a hot day against this new color of my fire.  It continuously flares out from me as I stand up, pointing right at him and getting closer.  I ball my fist up and throw my fire-coated fists at his forearms, the anger still building inside me.  I want him to yield before me already, so he can pay for his sin.

Even after my quirk blinks out, I continue punching at him, blinded by both rage and hot tears.  It wasn't until something wrapped around my arms and restrained me suspended slightly off the ground that I finally stop.

"I'm not putting you down until you're cooled down," Aizawa growls, his quirk and capture weapon smothering me.

Everyone was already staring at the scene.  Although I scowl, I go limp and show no signs of resistance.  When my body finally relaxes, I feel a sharp pain shooting up my hands and forearm.  Once I'm free, I inspect my hands, noticing the beginning blisters of burns coating everything from my fingertips to my elbows.  Ouch.  My fire's never done that before.  It's probably those flames I used.  The dull pain in my nose starts throbbing.

"Both of you took this training a little too seriously," our teacher glowers at us.  "I'll deal your punishment later.  Can I trust that you won't kill each other going to see Recovery Girl?"

"Yes sir," we both mutter out.

.

The walk over there was quiet.  I trudged ahead because I didn't want to see his face, but I had to feel his gaze bore into my skull again.  After a good scolding from Recovery Girl, we were told to rest for a little while in the office before going back to class.  I try to lie back and ignore him, indulging myself in quiet.  I was so full of emotion that my flames turned hotter than they have before, but I have to use them sparingly since they can burn my normally fire-resistant skin.  I'll have to make some adjustments to my hero costume gloves too.

"Do you have a person vendetta against me or something?"

Even just the sound of his blank voice makes me roll my eyes.  "Hm, I wonder what could've given you that crazy idea."

Todoroki rolls up to a sitting position and faces me.  Just like mine, his arms are wrapped in bandages.  Apparently, because I punched him with my white-blue fire, he has some burns too, though not as severe as my own.  He peers at me from one grey eye, the other one covered by a bag of ice he nestles against his new bruise.  "I'd like to know why."

I clench my fists weakly against the pain.  "I really don't feel like burning this office to a crisp right now, so we shouldn't talk about it."

"I think it's only fair when someone's holding a grudge against another, both parties should be clear on what the grudge entails."

Stupid logical idiot.  "Fine."  I sit myself up with a little more difficulty and flash him a harsh glare.  "When we were in Junior High, you pushed me away when I tried to be friendly with you.  I know you remember how weak I was and how much everyone else teased me because I said I want to be a top hero, like your dad.  You were cold to me that way, but that's not the only reason I hate you.  These girls in our class didn't like that I was getting close to you, so they started teasing me, harassing me, and beat me up."  I pivot my entire body towards him as I hiss my next words, "And you watched them without interfering.  You let a victim get bullied and you did nothing.  Someone who wants to be a hero and save people, and got into this school on a recommendation, can't even be bothered to be a hero to his classmates when they're being bullied."  Shaking my head, I add, "You disgust me.  You're no hero, you're just an extremely powerful pompous asshole.  You make me sick."

Todoroki's entire demeanor changes.  Instead of the cold expression he always displays, his eyebrows relax out of their furrowed position.  He looks down at his wrapped arms.  "I...didn't think at the time.  Yes, I saw it happen.  Frankly, I was disgusted by you having a similar quirk as my father and wanting to be a hero after him."  His left hand clenches.  "That power repulses me, which is why I never use it in combat.  Watching you go through all that, I rationalized to myself that you were strong enough to take it."

His fist relaxes and he bows his head somberly.  "I know it's no excuse for what I did, I apologize for that.  I take full responsibility for your hatred."

I'm quiet, kind of stunned.  I've sometimes imagined Todoroki apologizing to me, but seeing it happen is somehow surreal.  Rubbing the back of my head, I admit, "Well, I have to say that it's partially because of you that I was spurred to start training and become as I am now.  So thank you, I guess."  And although I really don't want to, I also say, "I'm sorry I broke your wrist in training last week.  And burned you today.  And almost tried to kill you in general.  It was all overboard and I've been a huge jerk about this whole thing."

He offers a nod.  "I believe it's safe to say our differences have been settled, then.  I hope we can patch things up and become better classmates now that this is all behind us."

Without looking at him, I hold out my fist between our beds.  When he takes too long, I roll my eyes.  "It's a fist bump, it's what f-friends do."

I sense his eyes dart between my definitely tinted cheeks and my fist, before his fingers daintily close over it.  "I'd rather do this, if you don't mind."

Peeking over at him, I open my hand, allowing him to gently clasp my hand between his fingers and his palm.  A new sense of warmth washes over me when I look into his eyes.  Though his features are as non-emotive as ever, his relaxed, mismatching orbs rest on me in what I can only place as support or respect.

"You're strong, (Y/n), and although my previous unfair actions towards you are what primarily coaxed it out, I know you already were in your mind and heart.  I look forward to seeing it as we both progress to becoming heroes together."

His slight softening shifts something within both of us.  And that moment told me that our new relationship would evolve into something greater.

[buzzdixonwriter]

COMPARE & CONTRAST: Birth Of A Nation vs Gone With The Wind vs The General

TRIGGER WARNING:   Talking about race in American culture and movies, so some readers may want to brace themselves (looking at you, wypipo).

. . .

Confining “classic films” to movies that: Demonstrate technical expertise, and Influenced other films and creators

-- we have three (and only three) movies about the American Civil War we can safely put in the classic bin.

Before we go further, let’s restate the obvious: A film’s impact in the medium of motion pictures is separate from its impact on the culture as a whole.

Case in point: Leni Riefenstahl’s The Triumph Of The Will is a perfect textbook example of how to stage massive crowd scenes for maximum visual impact, and how to promote individuals and ideas in purely cinematic terms.

It also contributed mightily to the Nazis’ rise to power, their subsequent wars of conquest, and the deaths directly and indirectly of tens of millions of human beings.

It’s important to know The Triumph Of The Will exists and why it’s important in film and cultural and political history, but you need never subject yourself to its vile hate mongering.

With that in mind, let us proceed.

. . . 

Here are the three bona fide classic movies about the American Civil War:

The Birth Of A Nation (1915)

Gone With The Wind (1939) 

The General (1926)

They are all problematic for the same reason: They embrace the “lost cause” myth of Southern white supremacists.

The Birth Of A Nation is by far the worst offender of the trio, helping to restart the Ku Klux Klan and promulgate jim crow for decades to come.

Director D.W. Griffith was a Southern boy, Kentucky born with a father who served as a colonel in the Confederate army (Kentucky, a border slave state, tried to stay neutral at the beginning of the Civil War, then leaned heavily towards secession, but by 1862 threw its lot in with the Union).

Griffith bought into the lost cause myth heavily, and The Birth Of A Nation explicitly states African-Americans are fit only for slavery, becoming a murderous / rapacious mob once freed, and the Ku Klux Klan were gallant heroes attempting to turn this tide.

Griffith tries to have it both ways, depicting Abraham Lincoln as a thoughtful and compassionate leader who would have treated the South better had he survived (ignoring the fact Andrew Johnson did everything in his power to prevent the Union from holding the South accountable, and that Lincoln’s assassin was a Southerner who killed him in revenge after the war ended).

There can be no denying Griffith’s enormous talents as a film maker (again, separating thematic content from the technical expertise).  While the Hollywood publicity machine was quick to claim The Birth Of A Nation was the first feature length film (i.e., 65 minutes or more), the truth is the Australians, the Chinese, the English, the French, the Italians, the Japanese, and the Russians all made feature films long before Griffith, and Griffith wasn’t even the first American to make a feature but was preceded by at least a half a dozen other film makers.

What Griffith was, however, was a master synthesis of all the techniques that preceded him.  Griffith made movies better than anyone else of his era, and his best films are still eminently watchable to this day.

That’s what makes The Birth Of A Nation so harmful and destructive:  Like the Riefenstahl film, it seduced common audiences into complacency while stirring the worst people to action.

It’s a film whose final cost is not measured in dollars but in innocent blood and tears.

Griffith wasn’t stupid, and while he might have felt personally immune to the criticism of his racist attitudes, he was savvy enough to recognize publicly embracing them would not serve his career well.  He followed The Birth Of A Nation with Intolerance, an epic that jumps around in its story lines like a Tarantino film, and in later movies displayed a far gentler albeit still patronizing attitude towards African-Americans.

But the damage was done, the lost cause myth cemented into not just the Southern psyche but white America in general.

Like The Triumph Of The Will, I would never recommend The Birth Of A Nation as a “must see” film to anyone.  If you’re a film historian and you want to subject yourself to this cancer, that’s your choice, but if you’re a student of film there’s nothing Griffith did technically or artistically in this movie that he didn’t do better in his later efforts, and other film makers have since emulated his innovations and built upon them.

. . . 

For many decades Gone With The Wind was celebrated as the pinnacle of American film making, but once the romantic blinders were removed we see it for what it is:  An over long, over blown epic that promulgates what we now recognize as white supremacy, classism, and rape culture.

And while it uses every technical trick in the book, it doesn’t use them as well as Orson Welles did a year later with Citizen Kane.

Gone With The Wind is really two movies:  A well made Civil War epic and its lackluster Reconstruction sequel.

They should have ended the movie with “As God is my witness, I’ll never go hungry again!”  (Seriously.  The only two memorable scenes in the second half other than “I don’t give a damn” both center around Scarlett O’Hara’s dresses.)

Again, let’s emphasize that a technically well made movie does not excuse bad intentions in thematic content.

Gone With The Wind is a rip-roaring bodice-ripping historical novel, admittedly well research and well written by Margaret Mitchell.

She isn’t necessarily writing from a conscious desire to spread the message of white supremacy, but as a Southern gal who grew up in the midst of the lost cause myth, she ends up breathing that message into every line of the book.

The movie version can’t escape that, nor does it try to.  There’s a brief scene early on where both Mitchell and the later film makers prefigure the lost cause myth where Rhett Butler explains to the good ol’ boys at the Tara cotillion that they’re about to be brutally decimated by the Union in a war of attrition, but both author and film makers side with the good ol’ boys and support their God given right to throw away their lives and destroy their homes in an attempt to keep enslaving millions of innocent people.

That last part in bold never gets mentioned, does it?  As others have observed, Gone With The Wind isn’t antagonistic towards African-Americans, rather it treats them as if they don’t exist other that walking / talking props among the scenery.

In that regard, Gone With The Wind is on par with The Fountainhead or Atlas Shrugged (only with a far superior writing style).  The protagonists of all three books are narcissistic sociopaths who will lie / cheat / steal / blow up buildings because the common folk -- the people who actually put in the grunt labor to make things work -- are nothing but slaves there for the elites’ entitlements, and God (or market forces, take your pick) help them if they ever raise their heads or voices -- much less their hands -- in protest.

Oh, but doesn’t it look gorgeous?  As those beautiful rich Technicolor gowns and sets and matte paintings.  All those balls and dances.  All those smoldering looks.  All those flames as Atlanta burns…

There’s the true hero of the story:  William Tecumseh Sherman.  The mofo cut the Confederacy in half, destroying lines of supply and communication, obliterating any rebels who dared to stand up to him, shortening the war by several months, and freeing tens of thousands of enslaved people in the process.

None of which would have been necessary if a few greedy bastards such as the O’Haras had lived Christian enough lives to say, “Y’know, maybe the way we’re treating these people is wrong…”

Gone With The Wind proved insanely popular, on a scale with The Birth Of A Nation a generation earlier, and once again it made it easier for mainstream middle American whites to turn a blind eye to injustices still being perpetuated on African-Americans of that day.  

And it kept playing again and again, one of the very few non-Disney movies to enjoy a substantial re-release schedule, popping up about once every seven years in theaters until the arrival of first cable then VHS.

And it’s still popular, still a steady seller in DVD and BluRay.

That’s in no small part to the skill of both Mitchell and the film makers in hiding the most egregiously problematic elements of the story under a think patina of romanticism.  It became a cultural touchstone that everyone knew and everyone could reference, from political cartoons to Carol Burnett skits.

But it’s still racist and white supremacist, saying African-Americans exist only to serve whites.

It’s still classist, saying not all whites are worthy of what the upper class hogs for itself.

It’s still about rape culture, saying all Scarlett needed was one good rape by Rhett Butler to set her straight.

Is it a product of its era?

Absolutely. The same way over the counter heroin at your friendly neighborhood drug store was a product of its era.  The same way cocaine laced Coca-Cola was a product of its era.

Just because it wasn’t recognized as a bad idea then means we should still circulate it now.

Compared to The Birth Of A Nation, Gone With The Wind is a far less hate filled work, and one that inspires less immediate harm.

It has inspired harm over several generations by making it easy to overlook the real harm it represents in favor of a romantic antebellum fantasy.

If someone wants to see a film that represents the Hollywood studio system at the height of its creative power, I’d recommend Casablanca or The Wizard Of Oz.

I’d put Gone With The Wind way down on that list, and I’d caution it with caveats, but I would say it represents a good example of the old Hollywood system firing on all eight cylinders.

At least for the first half of the film.

. . . 

In most ways, Buster Keaton’s The General is the least problematic of these three films.

In another, it’s as bad as Gone With The Wind.

The good thing about The General is that modern audiences can easily enjoy it.

Buster Keaton chasing after a stolen steam locomotive?  What’s not to love?

It’s one of his best comedies and if it’s not the very best, I’d hate to live on the difference.

It certainly lacks the overt racism of The Birth Of A Nation. 

In fact, it almost lacks any race at all.

And ironically, that’s what makes it a problem.

In researching this post, I re-watched The General, something I wasn’t willing to do for The Birth Of A Nation or Gone With The Wind.

I re-watched it looking for African-American faces anywhere in the film.

I think I found four.

Two porters lugging a trunk in an early scene at a train station, possibly two small children with their backs turned to the camera at the edge of a crowd about ten minutes later.

That’s it.

In a movie about one of the most crucial events in American history, an event entirely predicated on the issue of the enslavement of millions of African-Americans…that’s it.

Four faces.

Total screen time: Less than a minute.

If critics can justifiably lambast Gone With The Wind for sailing over the bloodied backs of millions of enslaved African-Americans to focus on the luxury liner S.S. Scarlett O’Hara, what can they say about a Civil War movie that almost succeeds in eradicating those enslaved humans from the story?

Paradoxically, this makes The General the safest of these movies to show an unsuspecting audience.

The Civil War is boiled down to the dark uniform army fighting the light uniform army; why they were fighting is never explored in detail.

But the lost cause myth was so prevalent at that point that Keaton and company didn’t need to discuss the causes of the war.

Audiences – even those completely ignorant of U.S. history -- automatically assume the light uniform army are the good guys simply because Buster is on their side.

Buster would never do anything bad, would he?

Of course not!

And so -- =poof!= -- millions of people erased from history.

Top that, Thanos.

To be honest, I don’t know how a modern audience should react to that, in particular an African-American audience.

Disappointment at being culturally short changed again?

Relief at being spared the most egregious stereotyping and white supremacy apologies?

Or just plain enjoy Buster chasing after a stolen locomotive?

The General’s cultural weightlessness helps it become a great film.

It’s a purely cinematic endeavor, with the intertitles used primarily to explain the spies’ and military leaders’ plans and motives, not tell us what Buster is thinking and doing.

For a guy called “the great stone face” Buster could be awfully expressive with his body language, and he needs title cards the least of all the performers in this movie

. . .

So where does that leave us, as a 21st century audience in a 21st century culture?

We can neither deny nor ignore the impact of these three films.  Even The Birth Of A Nation, as vile and as hateful as it is, influenced the country and the countries attitudes for a century.

Gone With The Wind feels like something we’ve outgrown, something some audience members can look back on with fondness, but not anything we can fully embrace again.

The General can still make us laugh, and in this case the sin of omission seems far less than the others’ sins of commission.

Learn from the past.

Do better in the future.

    © Buzz Dixon

[365days365movies]

January 4, 2021: First Blood (1982) (Part II)

Quick Recap before we go on. Oh, and SPOILERS right up top!

John Rambo (Sylvester Stallone) is a Vietnam vet wandering through Washington State, until coming upon the town of Hope, run by the Sheriff Will Teasle (Brian Dennehy).

Sheriff Will Teasle is an absolute dick who arrests Rambo for no real reason; just for being a “drifter.” His police force, which includes the sadistic Galt (Jack Starrett) and sympathetic Mitch (David Caruso, AKA Horatio Caine from CSI: Miami), beats John Rambo, and post-2020 me is UNCOMFORTABLE!!!!!!!

Rambo has Vietnam flashbacks (like you do) and escapes the prison, pursued by the obsessive and dickish Sheriff and his equally dickish men (except for Horatio, maybe).

Galt tries to shoot Rambo, and karma bitch-slaps him RIGHT in the face, holy shit. He dies, and Rambo is blamed and shot at, escaping into the forest.

OK?

OK. On with the recap!

At this point, all of Rambo’s actions are in self-defense. In truth, it’s been self-defense since the beginning. However, he does kill two dogs, so...yeah, can’t really justify that. That sucks. The dog’s handler gets shot by Rambo, who now has a gun, and we also see that Galt’s certified sociopathy has leaked into everybody else but Horatio upon his death, including the dog guy, who tells his dogs to straight up kill Rambo. But, as previously stated...that’s not what happens.

At this point, I should introduce the amemedala.

The amemedala is a portion of the mesencephalon (or midbrain) discovered in the brains of millennials and younger individuals, recently discovered, named, and made up by yours truly. This area, attached to the thalamus, acts as a relay center between the cerebrum and the various sensory receptors of the body, similar to the function of the thalamus. However, while the thalamus governs the broad relay of senses to the appropriate areas of the brain for analysis, the amemedala relays appropriate sensory signals to the frontal lobes, where catalogs of shared sociological trends, or memes, are housed. This relay and association generates connections between extrenal stimuli, and entries in the meme catalog of the frontal lobes. While this is technically an autonomic process, it can be suppressed with enough willpower.

Why am I ringing this up in the middle of First Blood? Because EVERY. SINGLE. CELL of my brain is working to suppress the amemedala right now. Why? BECAUSE OF THE LORAX, AND FOR WHOM HE SPEAKS.

Is it an outdated meme? Very much so. BUT I CANNOT GET IT OUT OF MY GODDAMN HEAD AS I WATCH THIS MOVIE.

OK. That is now out of my system. Anyway, Rambo continues to speak for the trees, which is understandably starting to spook the smalltown cops. This leads to the VERY surprising moment where a camouflaged Rambo appears OUT OF NOWHERE and stabs Horatio in the goddamn leg! Like, wow, he was invisible! I had to rewind the film to see where he was. This is tense...and awesome, not gonna lie. This is awesome.

And then, he gets another cop by JUMPING FROM A TREE. Well, a tree stump, BUT STILL. After he takes him out, he stands in plain sight in front of an approaching cop. That cop, subscribing once again to the shoot-first-ask-questions-later policy, fires. And I SWEAR, Rambo is FASTER THAN THOSE SPEEDING BULLETS, as he dodges out of the way, and the bullets HIT THE COP HE JUST TOOK OUT!

And then, when I didn’t think this could get any more intense, that cop triggers a booby trap, and A STICK WITH WOODEN SPIKES GOES THROUGH THIS MAN’S LEGS, AND HE’S SPEARED LIKE A KEBAB OH MY GOD

The asshole sheriff runs to the NEW set of panicked screams, and his compatriot is just Batman-ed away by Rambo. It’s just the sheriff, now. The storm is building, and the forest is getting darker. The sheriff frees leg-spike cop, and goes to find the other cop, who’s been PINNED TO A TREE LIKE A BUTTERFLY IN A DISPLAY CASE. See, look!

HOLY SHIT IT’S RAMBO WITH A KNIFE IN THE FOREST. He pins the sheriff up to a tree, then with some legitimately badass lines, threatens with the sheriff with “a war [he] wouldn’t believe,” and telling him to make like Elsa and…

I love this sequence. It is the most intense, crazy, holy shit sequence I’ve seen so far this month. Wow. I understand why people talk about this movie. Man, that was a hell of a ride! Good movie, though. All right, so, time for the final sco-

Oh. Oh, my God. I’m only HALFWAY INTO THE MOVIE?

...Wow. OK, then.

We now meet Colonel Sam Trautman, Rambo’s commander in the Green Berets. He’s come to “get his boy.” He says that he came to rescue the Sheriff’s dumb ass from Rambo, rather than the other way around. And the Sheriff is...an idiot. He’s an ass, he’s a maniac, and he’s a stubborn idiot. Even after learning that Rambo is the best, he’s unwilling to back down, the dummkopf.

Rambo kills a wild boar in the woods, which makes no sense for Washington State, but whatever, sure. Anyway, they try to get the colonel to lure Rambo out, even though that’s obviously gonna make his PTSD, just...SO much worse. Especially as he starts using Vietnam parlance in contacting him. Not gonna end well, guys. But it’s then that we learn that Rambo is now the last surviving member of his unit, contributing to his trauma. Rambo’s also been trying to get in contact with the Colonel, winding up here because he has no place to go. He says that there are no friendly civilians, and the trouble’s been caused by that “king-shit” cop. I will be using this term from now on.

Wow. Damn. Hell of a reason for that title. And I think I love this movie. Seriously, I’m having a good time.

King-Shit Cop keeps going ahead with his absolute idiocy, despite all warnings to the contrary. So, a bunch of troops now converge upon Rambo’s place, but he naturally opens fire on them, without killing a single person. In fact, he hasn’t killed anyone this whole movie, and they make a point of saying that he’s been holding back the whole time. So, they decide to use the next, most logical course of action. They FIRE A ROCKET AT HIM.

Afterwards, the Colonel and King Shit Cop catch up at a bar, where the latter exposes his full sociopathy, commenting that he just wanted to kill Rambo. This is opposed to the Colonel, who doesn’t really know what he’d do if Rambo survived.

Which, of course, he did. C’mon, you think a little military-grade propelled explosive is gonna kill John Rambo? Nah. He’s the best there ever was, and he’s gonna prove it now. He jumps into a military vehicle holding an M-60, and hijacks it. Doesn’t take long for the news to break that Rambo’s still kicking, and he’s quickly intercepted by King Shit Cop, who JUST. DOESN’T. KNOW. WHEN. TO QUIT. And I’d admire his tenacity if he wasn’t SUCH AN ASSHOLE.

The cops try to run Rambo and the truck of the road, and he plays the UNO Reverse Card on them instead. And I’m pretty sure at this point…

...that old Johnny boy’s just killed some cops. So, yeah, now there’s a bigger problem. He powers through the State Police blockade like it was a banner blocking a football team, stops at a gas station, grabs the gun from the car, and LIGHTS ALL OF THAT SHIT ON FIRE! Destroying the livelihood of an individual who had nothing to do with this.

Yeah, Rambo’s starting to turn from innocent acting in self-defense to public menace REAL quick. And yeah, it’s King Shit Cop’s fault entirely...but, yeah, Johnny needs some help, because he’s losing the train at this point. But, not to be outdone, King Shit Cop is also beginning to lose it, and it’s definitely beginning to seem like only one of them is going to come out of this alive. And the Colonel tries to give him an out, but King Shit Cop’s prepared to go down with the ship that he blew a hole in in the first place. Like an asshole.

But here we go, the finale. John Rambo vs. King Shit Cop (whose name, by the way, is Will Teasle. I just like Rambo’s name for him better). KSC’s on the roof, Rambo’s on the street. Rambo causes more property damage, possibly because banks also give him PTSD (I joke, but PTSD is no laughing matter, John clearly needs help), and then finds his way to a store that has just all of the ammo a psychologically-damaged Vietnam War veteran on a revenge quest could ever need.

And then he BLOWS. THAT. SHIT. UP.

And he does this...ALL of this...just to lure KSC out of hiding. This man DESTROYS A TOWN because this idiot, sociopathic, unhinged, King Shit Cop, won’t just STAND. THE FUCK. DOWN ALREADY.

Rambo enters the police station, where KSC is on the roof. And, like the Colonel and the rest of us guessed, KSC gets shot in the process. And as Rambo stands over KSC, the Colonel finally shows up and does what literally everybody else should have done.

Talk. He just...talks to Rambo. He talks to this mentally ill man, and that mentally ill man responds, espousing his pure anger at the war, the public, protesters, work, the country, the town, himself...everyone. And goddamn, is that shit palpable.

This man can no longer fit in the world that he was forced to leave, and forced to return to. This poor, poor, poor man. It hurts. And it sucks. And he pours his heart out to the Colonel, and to us, and...you feel it. You feel his trauma, you feel his pain. You feel the aftermath of war. And it’s been seven years at this point for the Colonel, but no time for John. Not Rambo. John. And it’s just...never over.

Damn. Goddamn.

This...this is one hell of a good movie. And not just a good action movie, either. A damn good movie.

And that’s it. That’s First Blood.

[thiswasinevitableid]

#08 with Danbrey, sfw please!

Here you go!

08.  I wrote my crush a note except I started it with ‘dear you’ and my friend stuck it into the wrong locker and now you think I have a crush on you 

“Dude, chill, you look like you’re gonna pass out in lunch.”

“I’m fine, totally fine.” Aubrey continues jiggling her leg and scanning the quad.

“Gotta side with Jake on this one” Duck pokes her with her unopened tupperware of salad, “c’mon, can’t work your charm on an empty stomach.”

“But what if it slipped out, or I wrote the directions wrong, or she loses it-”

“Dude, I put it in the locker myself, super careful and shit.”

“Uh, Aubrey, is that her?”

“Huh? Uh nope” Aubrey follows Duck’s pointer finger to a blonde girl in a green sweater and copper skirt who is clearly looking for someone. She’s cute, but she’s not who Aubrey is hoping to see.

“You sure? Because now she’s lookin’ right at us.”

Aubrey’s glad she hasn’t eaten, because it would be making it’s way back up. 

“Jake, what locker did you put the note in?”

“453?”

“453 B?”

“There’s more than one?”

“That’s the section of school that has an upper and lower level!” Aubrey squeak-hisses as the girl notices her.

“Ohhhhh. Sorry dude.”

Duck whacks his hand against his forehead as Aubrey goes deer in headlights under hazel eyes. 

“Uh, hi, Aubrey?”

“Yep.”

“I found this in my locker. I, we have bio and english together, but I hadn’t realized you’d been paying that much attention to me.”

“Yep, I sure have.” Aubrey can’t stop smiling; it’s like some kind of horrible survival mechanism. Crap, what is this girl’s name?

The sweet smile falters, “you don’t know I am, do you?”

“Nope.”

“Oh. I mean, I guess ‘dear you’ is kind of vague, so maybe I shouldn’t have assumed, but it was in my locker.”

“There was, um, a mix-up, it was supposed to go in someone else’s but the messenger messed up.”

“Sorry.” Jake gives his best baby-seal sad eyes.

“Okay.” The girl says, sheen of friendliness over her disappointment, “that’s, that’s totally fine. Mistakes happen. Here” she hands back the note, “so you can try again.”

Aubrey takes it, watches her turn, and lets her guilt the better of her, “wait, um, uh, um-”

“Dani.” The girl says flatly.

“Dani, right. Would you, like, want to come to this magic show I’m doing tonight? You seem super cool and my act is pretty good. Duck and Jake are coming, right guys?”

“Apparently.” Duck looks at Jake, who shrugs. 

“Uh, sure. That sounds cool.

“Cool. Cool cool.” Aubrey hurriedly scribbles her phone number and the address of the cafe on the back of the mis-delivered note, “see you then.”

As they watch Dani walk away, Duck leans over and mumbles, “did you just ask a girl you barely know on a date?”

“No, I asked her to come to my show. Totally not a date.”

----------------------------------------

Okay, so this totally isn’t a date. Dani finds a spot on the right side of the room, sets her chai latte and scoots the chair across the scratched hardwood.

But if it’s not a date, then where are Aubrey’s two friends? Aubrey asking her feels pretty date-ish (unbeknownst to her, Jake has fallen asleep and Duck is busy “studying” with his boyfriend). 

Aubrey takes the stage to mild applause and Dani sighs; she looks so cool, so pretty in her magicians outfit. Just like she looks cool and pretty in her denim vest and combat boots at school, or when she’s staring out the window during class and the light hits her face and hair just right and she looks like a painting. 

Dani’s had a crush on her since the fall, has brainstormed with her best friend, Barclay, how to ask her out. But when they inevitably come to the conclusion that asking her out involves actually talking to her, Dani panics and gives up. 

When she’d found the note, she couldn’t believe her luck. Then, when she learned the truth, she still couldn’t believe it, because man was that some shitty luck. 

Aubrey runs through her act, Dani entranced every moment of it. She’s even more dynamic onstage than she is in class, her energy coursing through the room and making everyone turn and look at her. She has a minor hiccup when her animal assistant, Dr. Harris Bonkers, PhD, runs off with her prop, but she plays it off and has the audience laughing as she sets the indignant bunny back on his spot. 

When the show is over, Dani goes to join her as she packs up her stuff. 

“That was so cool.”

“Thanks!”

“Seriously, it was like you’re a professional, you were so incredible up there.”

“Practicing in the bathroom mirror works wonders. And annoys my dad when I do it for two hours non-stop.”

“How’d you do the thing with the fire and the coin? Oh, wait, you're not supposed to reveal your secrets right?”

“I mean that’s kinda like the magician’s code, but…” Aubrey smiles teasingly, tapping her chin in exaggerated thought. 

“Please?” Dani bats her eyelashes, making Aubrey giggle, a sound that’s even better up close, and the reaction emboldens her, “what if I buy you ice cream as a trade?”

“Pretty sure I can, like, bend the code for that.” She hoists her bag over one shoulder and lifts Dr. Harris Bonker’s carrier with her hand, “let me just put some stuff in my car first.”

Soon they’re sitting at the nearby Yogurt Castle, on a stone bench outside since they have the rabbit with them. Dani takes a sliced strawberry from the top of her cone and holds it up to the carrier. The rabbit chomps down and devours the fruit with alarming speed. 

“Hungry bunny.” 

“He wants you to think I never feed him so he’ll get more strawberries. But I do. When I first got him I gave him too many treats and he wouldn’t fit in the compartment for the hat trick.”

“Did he have to go on a bunny diet?”

“Yep” Aubrey licks her spoon and Dani blushes, hoping the darkness covers it, “he ate my boots in revenge.”

“Dr. Harris Bonker’s, that was very rude.”

Aubrey nudges their feet together, “thanks for using his full title, he worked hard for that PhD.”

They spend the next hour just chatting, and Dani learns that Aubrey likes most of the same bands as her and that her face crinkles in the most adorable way when she grins. 

“Hey” Aubrey touches her arm as they’re walking back to their cars, “I really liked hanging out with you. Do you, um, wanna hang out again sometime?”

“That sounds great.” 

--------------------------------------

“See, when they’re planted like this, the marigolds help keep aphids away.” Dani finishes patting soil around the small plants, budding but not yet blooming. 

“Wow. It’s like natures bug control.”

“Yep” Dani nods, adjusting her straw hat, “we try really hard not to use pesticides and stuff in the community gardens. C’mon, let’s go check on the strawberries.”

Aubrey takes her offered hand, standing and following her through the rows of seedlings and saplings, spring sun soaking into her shoulders. She’s been spending more and more of her weekends here in the gardens with Dani helping her when she can and talking with her while she tends to her patches of the space. Dr. Harris Bonkers comes sometimes, Dani insisting that his nibbling on plants is offset by the fact that his poop is excellent compost. Aubrey comes to give them both fresh air, to give the rabbit some enrichment and herself the chance to learn something totally new. 

But mostly she comes because Dani is here. 

The crush crept up on her little by little, solidified the day Dani suggested they go on a picnic and then made a mini-salad for Dr. Harris Bonkers. Aubrey’s had plenty of crushes over this year, but with Dani it’s like someone whacked her in the head with the two-by-four of love. 

Dani kneels down in the earth by the strawberry plants, looking at the leaves and little unripe berries to make sure they’re growing okay. Her hair drapes like molten gold across her face and shoulders, and when she brushes it out of the way she leaves a streak of dirt on her cheek, laugh like a birdsong when she notices. She looks like a goddess, some ethereal creature of sunlight and growth sent to earth. And Aubrey is ready to worship her. 

---------------------------------

“Aubrey, you know you can just ask her out for real, right?”

“But what if she doesn’t believe me or thinks it’s a mistake again or she actually isn’t interested in me but is just being super nice and touchy-feely in a friend way?”

“Because none of that sounds like her?”

“Agggh, what do I do Duck?”

“Please just ask her out already.” Rumbles a voice behind them. 

Aubrey and Duck jolt, tun to find the source of the voice is Barclay, Dani’s friend. 

“Seriously, all she does is talk about you, which is good because I like seeing her happy, but if I have to hear her agonizing over whether you like-like her one more time, I’m gonna lose it.”

“Is that enough proof?”

“But, like, what if-”

“Aubrey” Duck crosses his arms, “just ask her, or I’m goin’ back on my promise to bunny-sit.”

“Fine.”

“Thank fuck.”

“And I think I, like, maybe have an idea about how to do it…

-------------------------

The note falls out when she opens her locker after school.

Dear you, meet me by the red benches out front. Love, your secret admirer

She crosses her fingers and toes as she walks out to the front of the school, hoping to see black hair and a freckled, smiling face waiting for her on that bench. 

She does. 

“Um, hey.” Aubrey keeps looking nervously down at her shoes.

“This isn’t another mistake, right?”

“Nope. I wanted to ask you out because I’ve got a big fucking crush on you, cutie.”

Dani drops down onto the bench with relief, “thank god because I could not handle that mix-up twice. I have a huge crush on you too, fireblossom. I have for months.”

“Hold the fuck on, months? Like, before we were hanging out? Ugh, oh god, the first note, now I feel like even more of a jerk for the mistake.”

Dani loops her arm over Aubrey’s shoulder, “want to know how to make it up to me?”

“Hoo boy do I.”

Dani cups her chin, leans in and kisses her gently. Aubrey sighs, scooting closer as the kiss deepens and finally ending up in her lap. When they break apart, Aubrey bumps their noses together in what she always calls a bunny kiss. 

“Sooooooo this means you want to go out with me, right?” Aubrey smiles, only half-joking. 

“Yes, hot stuff, it does.”

Aubrey sighs, kisses her neck before resting against her. And for the third time in months, Dani can’t believe her luck.