#renew rottmnt
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I don't art but this moment from my fic, Eggshells wanted art.
Donnie accidentally turns Leo into a baby turtle, then proceeds to try and hide it from his brothers
“Yup. We will…have fun, I–we’ll just go,” Donnie said, motioning up towards the surface with his hands.
“What are you holding there?” Raph asked.
Donnie started, realizing he’d stopped holding Leo behind his back at some point in the conversation. He startled, jumping a few inches in the air and shouting the first thing he could think. “OREO.”
“Ooh, can Raph have it?”
“NO.” Donnie yelled, running from the room.
#rottmnt#rottmnt leo#rottmnt eggshells#ravenwingdark#my fic#fanart#fan art#for myself?#renew rottmnt#save rottmnt#leonardo hamato#rottmnt donnatello#rottmnt donnie#rottmnt raph#rottmnt mikey#hurt leonardo#rottmnt movie#rise donnie#rise leo#rise raph#rise mikey#tmnt leonardo
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Patition for Rottmnt Season 3!!!
IHello internet! Wanted to share this petition! The second link has nearly 15,000 signatures and the more it has the more likely nick, the news, etc. May acknowledge it!
#rottmnt#rottmnt season 3#rise of the tmnt#Season three#Petition#Petition to renew rottmnt#Rise#support#reblog to spread awareness#Tmnt 2018#rottmnt movie#Let me know if I missed any tags#Legitimate petition#Change.org#Renew rottmnt#save rottmnt#save rise of the tmnt#save rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles
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Guys look! There’s a petition to get rottmnt back!
It’s a bit old but it can still help, it’ll take two seconds to sign, it’s worth a shot!
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Hey, so this is going to be a whole rant, sorry I've been gone.
Lack of internet and mainly my job i feel like a workaholic 😭
Anyway, so not many of you know but I've been a TMNT fan for most of my life.
I, unfortunately, grew up with the 2012 series, there are several reasons why that show went downhill.
Donnie x April, writing, the romantic trope is written, the turtles all having a romantic love interest, Leo crushing on Kirai ( his sister may i say) and honestly lost me after the love triangle with April, Donnie, and Casey.
except for Raphael and Mona Lisa, i love them as a couple i wish rise had them in the show or movie.
I have seen the 1980s movies and cartoon shows of TMNT through my dad who is an even bigger fan of TMNT but only the originals.
I'll explain more on, however, 2003 or 2007 i have never seen.
Honestly, I have never loved TMNT more than Rise, I'm in love with Leo and Donnie smart and funny guys count me in XD
I recently started watching the show and when it came out and 15 year old me, did not give it a chance.
At first, i thought it was dumb, i still think they look like frogs lol and i was still confused why April's skin color was changed.
I was used to seeing white April than black April and my dad does not see her as April but as a completely different character.
I'll get back to that later but oh boy i missed out on a good show, given it is still too kiddy for me.
But i love the humor, animation and yes, i believe Leo and Donnie carry the show with the humor :)
Just watching season 1 is making me happy, I'm super into it.
I just love it's the opposite of the old TMNT and less serious.
The old TMNT never really got me into loving the turtles like Rise i just liked them like heroes until Rise..
Usually, Leo is the serious older brother, and leader, Ralph angry fighter, and Donnie is an inventor genius while Mikey is the big pizza lover and fun kid.
While on the rise...
Raph is a giant softie older Brother, Leo is a dumb ninja, Donnie is genius still but autistic in this world which is confirmed and Mikey isn't a full-on pizza lover like in the previous media adaptions but an artist, a fun-loving kid who loves pizza like his bros.
I love the fact Shelldon's voice by the original Michelangelo.
I hope to watch season 2 and the movie soon, definitely won't see the movie til i see season 2.
I recently got into the Rottmnt fandom and made two OCs
Emily & Gwendolyn, i mention them because of the topic I'm going to bring up.
So as far as i will til i upload the drawings of my OCs.
Emily is a half-American half-Japanese teenage human girl, with a mysterious/dark past, best friends with April, and has a HUGE crush on Leo.
Emily lives with her aunt, uncle and cousins it is noting her father is not in the picture and confirmed he is deceased while the mother is a mystery for now.
It's a semi-canon Emily has a large dragon burn mark on her right arm
{...}
Gwendolyn or Gwen is Donnie's human online friend she is surprised that he is a turtle mutant but thinks it is cool, she is a geek, hipster, comic book lover, and mainly chill.
She is basically Ramona Flowers, with the chill vibe, hammer weapon, and dying her hair every day different color.
Gwen is a chubby, Hispanic teenage girl, she lives in New York with her family and is a classmate to April and Emily.
She is known as a smart gal, hipster internet blogger, and gamer.
She is a love interest for Donnie but is not confirmed until later on that they're dating (most likely early season 2 wise)
I recently heard that if you have a cartoon and you have a certain race that character has to be voiced by that certain race.
That kinda sounds like reverse racism, i would go into it but don't want to say anything wrong.
But if i were to choose voice actors for my OCs Emily definitely be voiced by 'Misuki' even though she is only a singer she would be perfect for Emily
Gwen probably would be voiced by Zoe Saldaña, i just see her voice like that :)
Now as for TMNT 2014 & 2016 Bayverse i did not enjoy as much the CGI was just weird and the first movie was alright but the second i wasn't into.
Once again one of the turtles had a crush on April, Mikey.
I dont mind mutant x mutant or mutant x human but it has become weird ever since 2012 Donnie had a crush on April 2014 Mikey had a crush on April.
And now mutant mayhem Leo having a crush on April. What's next Raph has a crush on April.
Personally, i think they should use a different female character to be shipped with the turtles other than April.
As some may tell i didn't enjoy the TMNT mutant mayhem movie, the humor was there but the writing and animation didn't make me fall in love with it, unlike Rise.
However, my dad or i suppose any old TMNT fan, doesn't enjoy the new adaption of TMNT as it become more childish than serious.
Well, from what i seen as an old TMNT fan my dad didn't enjoy the animation or new personalities of the turtles in Rise and the humor doesn't hit him as much.
It's just fun and funny to me him criticizing the show that i personally enjoy XD
I kinda do ship April and Cassandra, not going to lie thought it would be cute :))
Honestly, realized I'm the same age as Raph XD Oh shit, still ship Mona Lisa and Raph though.
This is all i had to rant about, i do love the ROTTMNT series more than the previous franchises before.
Also, I recommend these videos that goes into the deeper dive of TMNT & ROTTMNT all together to get what I mean.
https://youtu.be/bHVB6Ple0bI?si=JB5ump3eYFWFvn1w
https://youtu.be/iBBMxpyLp5E?si=5AqtJLimueLIS1vf
https://youtu.be/_fFXXF051ZI?si=b7jF4SeIJY0Achgm
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#tmnt 2012#rant post#My ocs#Upcoming chacters#Tmnt 2012 & ROTTMNT#Renew ROTTMNT#it's so good#april o'neil#cassandra jones#casey jones#master splinter
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I want Rise of The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles season 3.
Thank you for listening.
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don’t look at me I’m crying 😭
chapter 3 was hilarious so i made a comic
the fic is Eggshells by @ravenwingdark Eggshells - Chapter 1 - RavenWingDark - Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (Cartoon 2018) [Archive of Our Own]
his eyebrow 😦
#stop i can’t handle this#rottmnt#rottmnt fanart#rottmnt leo#rottmnt eggshells#rottmnt donnie#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#renew rottmnt
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WELP SEEMS LIKE KRITA JUST WANTED TO MAKE MY WHOLE WORK DISAPEAR- atleast I still have this ones, souuuu, ENJOY ♡♡
more under the bar
#doodle#sketch#my art#rottmnt#rise of the tmnt#rise donnie#rise leo#rise raph#R.O.A.R.#renewal of a revolution! Lex
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👑🚝🦟🗡️Lena really own voice acting in animation as well she does in live action🗡️🦟🚝���
#lena headey#uncle grandpa#infinity train#tales of arcadia#rottmnt#Aunt grandma#Big mama#morgana le fay#amelia hughes#a queen#Binge watching rise s2!#toa#renew infinity train#Can't wait for tottmnt!#wizards toa#trollhunters#I miss infinity train so much!
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This took longer to draw because of the flower (。-∀-).
#rottmnt olivier#red spider lily#red spider lily can symbolize death or renewal#rottmnt#rottmnt oc#original character#oc#twitter trends
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i hate this guy [one million photos of him fall out of my wallet] wait
UM nothing special to say just been thinking about warren again. still in my weird al hyperfix too so just... shoves my interests together. in my head warren would flirt like this and i cant decide if i love or hate it. both...
#alloyart#warren stone#i can just see warren using godawful pickup lines in my minds eye#i think he honestly HAS the ability to be actually smooth he just doesnt utilize it often#the worst part? it would work on me </3#rottmnt#apropro of absolutely nothing i just thought about warren the other day at uni and started doodling him in my diary and well#guess my crush has been renewed. everyone say hello to my boyfriend. he is a worm
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"Animation is only for kids" im going to fist fight you
#having. Emotions about the owl house#ughhhh i thought i had accepted it but the post hoot. they could have done so much more#they wrote. all of season 2a thinking they were going to have a full third season.#i am just. so tired of animated shows getting cancelled.#rottmnt gets season 2 cut in half and theyre given like six weeks to write a finale#infinity train gets cancelled because it 'was too mature' or whatever and then gets taken off of hbo max#(Still INCREDIBLY pissed abt that btw)#dead end paranormal park gets cancelled. inside job gets cancelled. im so tired.#at least moon girl and devil dinosaur has already been renewed for a season 2.....#and dont get me started on the live action remakes!!! Im so tired of people acting like live action is an inherently more mature medium!!!#RESPECT. ANIMATION.#one shining light in this is the lackadaisy pilot....god it felt so good to see animation like that....#i truly hope that more indie animation can succeed.
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wtf it costs $100 to get SF6 with all the TMNT?
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Pfft, you @plum-soda-reblogs
I’m so sorry but I really am NOTTT a big fan of Frida’s design I’m so sorry but I will absolutely not change my Frida to go with that one thank you very much I like my beautiful Frida Venus de’Milo and I am in fact a HUGE hater rn UGH
Look at my beloved Frida Venus, NOT a Hamato but still having a connection to them by being the first experiment and being thrown at by Draxum and taken in by big mama I love her I love her I’m ignoring canon Frida I love her I love her I love her this is the real one RB Frida is the real one she- ggrgrhrhrg
#I’m half and half hahaha#I love my design#and even tho she has lips for some reason#I’m so glad she got canonized and hope she can help rise renew#rottmnt frida#rottmnt big mama assistant#rottmnt big mama’s assistant
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Rise fans, here’s how to ACTUALLY get the show renewed:
Ok gang, looks like the creator of rottmnt has hinted that if we make enough noise, renewal can creep back onto the table. As someone who’s spent the better part of a year in the Our Flag Means Death fandom and have observed organized tactics that actually worked to draw attention and get it renewed, I have some advice.
Whenever you tag #rottmnt, tag or @ Nickelodeon as well. I cannot stress enough how important this is. When you don’t do this the chances of someone from the team actually seeing your post drops exponentially. When we were grinding to get ofmd season 2, a hugely important part of that success was the organized effort to call out to HBO Max directly.
Likewise, find out which social Media Nickelodeon networkers, producers, representative accounts, etc are actually active on. Post there. Again, it’ll increase the chances of the campaign actually being noticed for the scale that it is. Posting #saverottmnt on sites that Nickelodeon simply doesn’t frequent is not pointless, but it really only serves to drum up hype and tell fans possibly in the dark about the movement. But as I said before, our most important target is the Studio itself.
Try to also hashtag #saveRiseOfTheTeenageMutantNinja Turtles. It’s a lot to type I know, but the show’s acronym may not show up in whatever systems the studio uses to track the internet presence of their content.
Watch the show and movie on it’s official platforms like you need it to breath. Watch it as many times as you have the whim to, turn it in in the background while you do chores, show it to your friends and family members, ANYTHING to help cause a noticeable spike in viewership. It HAS to be official platforms too or it doesn’t count. Ratings are king.
This one’s a little more involved but if even just a a few dozen or a hundred people have the means, it can make big waves. Send in physical letters. Especially in our near completely digital age, a real stamped, hold in your hand letter is not going to be buried. It is way harder to ignore something that showed up at your door rather than something you need to either be looking for, or be in the right place to see. If you can, write to Nickelodeon about what the show means to you, make appeals directly to them about why the show deserves to be renewed, and also importantly, why it would be profitable to the company. Your main incentive to have a paramount plus prescription is the turtles? Let them know you’ll cancel it when you get bored watching the same two seasons over and over. This show had a huge impact on your life at a time you needed it most? Share that!
The bottom line: campaigns are only as successful as their volume and audience. Make sure you’re not only making the right kind of noise, but make sure you’re talking to exactly the people your message is for. Alright everyone,
LETS GET ROTTMNT BACK!
#signal boost!#rottmnt#save rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#Nickelodeon#show renewal#how to get a show renewed#fandom#tmnt#biceratops
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ROTTMNT EPISODE ORDER
We fans know how hard it is not only to access the show's episodes, but to watch them in order as well. I created this list when I was rewatching the show and noticing all the inconsistencies in the timeline. I went off the production codes for the base order, then rearranged it based on what made sense to me. I organised the plot into more consistent arcs. So this isn't THE order, but it's the order I watch it in and enjoy. Hopefully it's a useful resource for some of you too!
Some spoilers below, because I left notes for myself to explain the order. (Dm me if you wanna know where I watch the show 🏴☠️)
SEASON 1
The Mad Dogs are born, and decide to start going on missions to help the city.
Mutant mayhem. Turtles, April, Draxum, Hidden City, and weapons introduced.
Origami tsunami. Inspired, the team decides to go on a hero mission. Foot clan introduced. Raph makes a full mystic body, only briefly.
Newsworthy. The team continues to do missions of a much smaller scale. First mutant introduced. Raph can make a full magic arm.
The turtles explore ways to better their new hero team in between living their regular lives.
War and Pizza. Donnie tries to use his tech for good. Raph fails to activate his ninpo.
Donnie’s gifts. Donnie tries to use his tech for good again, and it works this time. Too bad the team doesn't like it. Meat sweats introduced.
Down with the sickness. Raph and Leo’s leadership skills are explored.
Shell in a cell. PBJ duo and leader duo navigate their dynamics. Ghost bear introduced.
Repo mantis. With their friendship renewed, Donnie and Mikey hang out. Todd is introduced, the turtle tank is acquired.
Hypno! Part Deux! While Mikey and Donnie are gone, Leo and Raph help April with a problem at school. April has no friends, her side plot of wanting to be normal is introduced.
Minotaur maze. Hueso and the mystic pizza restaurant are introduced.
The Fast and the Furriest. The turtle tank is completed.
Mascot Melee. Raph explores the surface.
The gumbus. Baxter Stockboy is introduced.
Bug Busters. The team tries to deal with the oozesquitos themselves. Big Mama is introduced, Baron Draxum lore, Leo’s strategy explored. Raph’s mystics improve.
The longest fight. The team is a bit reluctant to sacrifice their time for missions. Armor plot introduced.
Al be back. Satisfied that they seemingly stopped the foot clan, the team carries on with their lives. Stockboy returns. Alberto is taken care of. Splinter is shown to be musically inclined.
Mrs. Cuddles. Mrs. Cuddles only shows up here.
Nothing but truffle. Todd and Meat sweats return.
Stuck on you. Raph tries to get the Mad Dogs to improve their teamwork. The shell hogs are introduced. The armor plot is furthered.
Pizza pit. Bug buster suits and shell hogs are used again.
The purple jacket. The purple dragons are introduced.
Smart lair. After meeting the purple dragons, Donnie has a renewed interest in his tech. Donnie tries to use his tech for good. Shelldon is introduced.
Late fee. Ghost bear returns.
Mind meld. Donnie tries to lead a mission, and it doesn't go well. Donnie tries to ‘fix’ his brothers again using tech. The purple dragons are mentioned.
Hot soup: the game. Mikey goes on the team's first solo mission. Donnie puts more faith in his brothers. The foot recruit is introduced.
The Evil League of Mutants. The team goes on a mission again to stop crab men at the greenhouse, and it doesn't go well. They ask Splinter to train them again. The mad dogs aren't satisfied with Splinter's training, but Splinter teaches them to be more creative and improve without weapons. They get targeted by Baron Draxum. Baron Draxum backstory.
Bullhop. After seeing how many enemies they have, the team decide to fix at least one mistake and make a friend. Bullhop is introduced. The team carefully plans a mission together, but it doesn't go according to plan. Big Mama's web plot hits a dead end.
Turtle-dega Nights: The Ballad of Rat Man. Splinter backstory mentioned. Big mama mentions how they stole her webs in bullhop. Warren doesn't wear the gauntlet all the time. Splinter vows to be a more attentive father.
The world becomes more dangerous, and Splinter begins formally training his sons.
Shadow of evil. Splinter pays more attention to April, and discovers a strange symbol on her shirt. Splinter and armor plots furthered. Splinter has to step up to meet his destiny, and promises to train his sons.
The ancient art of ninja hide and seek. Splinter makes good on his promise to train them. He trains them to improve without relying on weapons again. Lou jitsu and big mama lore.
The purple game. The mad dogs go to a sci-fi convention, except Donnie, who gets addicted to a game. The purple dragons are involved.
Jupiter Jim ahoy! Day two of the sci-fi convention. Splinter talks about being Lou jitsu. Jupiter Jim introduced.
The mutant menace. Baxter Stockboy causes mutant panic. The team needs to lay low for a while. Leo's portals grow in size and maximum distance, but struggle with going to the right location.
Warren and hypno sitting in a tree. The armor plot is furthered.
Portal jacked! Leo's portals send his brothers to the wrong location without him. The Hidden City is explored, Leo’s magic improves. Captain piel is introduced, Hueso and Leo grow closer.
Mystic library. The team finds another mystic location. Mystic library introduced, Raph’s magic improves.
Operation normal. Sunita is introduced, April's friendship plot and armor plot are furthered, Leo’s portals improve.
How to make enemies and bend people to your will. Draxum and armor plot furthered. Foot recruit returns.
Man vs sewer. Raph gets lost in the sewers. Leo’s leadership improves as his brothers don't take it seriously.
Sparring partner. Raph finds training a bit too easy, and rescues a paper ninja. With more free time and less of a power dynamic since Draxum became leader, foot recruit and foot lieutenant grow closer.
You got served. Huseo gets Leo and Mikey to be waiters for one night.
Snow day. Leo is using portals reliably. Ghost bear mutates.
One man’s junk. Donnie and Mikey go on their own mission to collect mystic metal, but aren't trusted in their decisions. Leo’s portals improve. Repo mantis’ cat introduced.
Cloak and swagger. Splinter tries to train the boys in the woods, but get stuck indoors. Sunita and April hang out. Shelldon is like Donnie’s son.
Todd Scouts. The mad dogs aren't taking training seriously. Splinter and the boys actually go to the woods this time. Donnie uses sign language, Todd reveals his mystic power.
Insane in the mama train. The boys choose to give themselves entirely to training. The armor plot is almost finished.
End game. The boys decide that being themselves is more effective than what they learned while training. Continuation of insane in mama train. Shredder introduced.
SEASON 2
Many unhappy returns. Continuation of end game. Lou jitsu backstory. Leo’s strategy improves, but he fails to communicate and coordinate with his team. Mikey’s powers improve. Raph’s powers improve (both in size and his first raph clone limb).
Goyles, Goyles, Goyles. Turtle mutation flashback.
After facing such a foe, the appeal of being a hero team fades a bit. Only Raph seems to be interested in continuing training and missions.
Flushed, but never forgotten. Mikey is playing the hot soup game. Buddy the paper ninja is there. Splinter says ‘you only learn lessons the hard way’, which I interpret to reference the harsh lesson from Todd scouts.
Lair games. Leo’s strategy improves. Leo gets on Donnie's bad side.
The hidden city job. Leo tries to get back on Donnie's good side. Leo goes to the Hidden City with Huseo. The shadow fiend is mentioned, the upcoming battle nexus mentioned.
Repairin’ the baron. Baron Draxum becomes an ally, and gets a job.
Pizza puffs. Raph is the last one still taking heroing seriously. The first villain is kidnapped.
Sidekick ahoy! Jupiter Jim returns. Raph is the only one acting rationally at first, then he too gives in.
Air turtle. Leo becomes a basketball mascot. Leo is still not a good communicator and fixes the problem himself.
Breaking purple. Shelldon is 13. Donnie tries to 'fix' Shelldon through discipline (he learned his lesson from Mind Meld not to mess with his mind), but learns his lesson not to forcefully change others once again, this time for real. The purple dragons are back.
Always be brownies. Foot recruit tries another way to gain power. Splinter bonds with her and April. More kidnapping.
Mystery meat. Draxum likes his job. He grows closer to the turtles.
Raph’s ride along. The team goes to the Hidden City for a holiday.
Donnie vs witch town. Donnie reveals that he wishes he had mystic powers. He learns that tech and mystics can work together.
Hidden city’s most wanted. Baron Draxum and Splinter grow closer.
Bad hair day. Leo has a spa day.
Fists of furry. April becomes a more integrated part of the family, and practises ninjutsu.
The clothes don’t make the turtle. Movie makeover montage! More kidnapping.
The Mad Dogs are forced into fighting once more.
Battle nexus New York. Kidnapper and shadow fiend revealed.
Finale part 1 & 2. Splinter’s memories are explored. Shredder returns. Karai is introduced, and lost. The lair is destroyed.
Finale part 3. April is accepted as a Hamato. The Mad Dogs unlock their ninpo.
Finale part 4. The final fight against the shredder. Cassandra Jones switches sides. Leo is made the leader, but he hasn't yet learned to be a good communicator and not do everything himself. How will he lead the team after seeing how dangerous this life can be? Does he double down like Raph would, or pull back and encourage fewer, safer missions without giving a reason?
#rottmnt#rise of the tmnt#unpause rise of the tmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt analysis#rottmnt leo#rottmnt mikey#rottmnt raph#rottmnt donnie
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Weak Spot - Chapter 56
RotTMNT Donatello x Reader
It's all about perspective in this week's chapter art by @garbagemilkshake
Warnings: Aged-up Turtles, Romance, Meet Cute, Villain Donatello, Cussing, Crushes, Xenophobia, Fear, Intimidation, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Hurt/Comfort, Love, AFAB Reader, Vaginal Sex, Sex Rough, Sex, Penis In Vagina Sex, Creampie, Teasing, Scent Kink, Sexual Tension, Breeding Kink, Multiple Orgasms, Cunnilingus, Fellatio, Marathon Sex, Somnophilia, Bondage, Feral Behavior, Feral Donatello, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Public Sex, Dom Donnie, Human/Turtle Relationships, Turtle Noises, Roleplay, Sexual Roleplay
Synopsis: A love story of villainous proportions! Though it hadn’t come easily, as these things rarely do, you found yourself in a whirlwind romance with a handsome and mysterious mutant. His idiosyncrasies had been easy to ignore as attraction grew into something more. However, will love endure when the unknowns about him end up being far darker than you ever considered?
Also available on Ao3
First 💜 Previous
Donnie was brooding. About what, you weren’t sure, but he was lost in thought. The kind that pinched up his face, he appeared compliant if you asked, but was clearly dodgy if you tried to figure out why. Asking for additional time with each question on his well being, it made you feel a sort of hopelessness. He was clearly feeling guilty about something out of his control. He did his best to make it up to you where he could, but there was something vexing him deeply.
For the time of year, you acknowledged the two special occasions coming up. One for hearts and the other of sentimentality, it wasn’t like Donnie to think so openly. You doubted he’d sulk over planning anything as important as your anniversary, which meant something else was bothering him.
It had gone on for nearly a week and not once had you gotten used to it. Instead, it was like an ever present weight in your heart each time you saw him thinking over his cause. You found him more often as of late, when you got home from work, still listlessly sitting at his desk. He’d been obviously ruminating and the way his monitors had timed out said how long he’d been at it. You played the dutiful partner and only pressed for hugging reassurances that you would always be there, whenever he was ready.
That day just so happened to be today.
“I… need to go to the Hidden City.”
He’d spoken suddenly after making you both warm drinks and offering one to you.
You had been reaching out to take yours and felt your hands hang there. “Is that…?”
“My status remains ‘wanted’.”
“Do… you need to go back into hiding?”
The cup offered in his hand lowered. “No.”
“I’m guessing the others haven’t broken their promise since you haven’t gone to maim them.”
“The rat’s word still stands.”
“Is something wrong?” You hesitated on the topic you were bordering on.
“I didn’t mean to make you guess.” He renewed his effort to give you your drink.
This time you got proper hold of it. “I’m not going to force you.”
“I’m…” He held out with distress painting him until he exhaled a modicum of it away. “I’m going to withdraw my holdings there.”
Your eyes shot wide. “Wait…”
“I know.” He gestured that he would sit.
You scooted backward into your spot on the couch so he could take his.
“I’ve been… debating. Pros and cons. Gut reactions. Integrated decision maps. I’ve run analysis. I’ve dusted off age-old algorithms. I’ve-!” He caught on more and sank down to stare into his mug. “Recently, you’ve allowed me to dabble further in my old habits and it has… summoned… interesting feelings.”
You folded yourself up close to translate you’d listen for as long as need be and sipped the liquid. Something new, you glanced down at it and found it in line with your tastes.
“I… enjoy my work, but I wonder if I prefer it because it is familiar or if it actually brings me joy.”
“You seemed like you were having fun watching Hypno and Warren destroy the place.”
He smiled a little and took the tiniest sip. “True, but… they made up.”
You nodded, letting the drink warm your body. “You were hoping otherwise.”
“I saw their qualms as advantageous. With Warren out of the way, I could extract more product from Hypno, but… to what end? Why? Why… do I… do this? Why…?”
You waited with curling fingers around hot ceramic.
“My holdings here make more than enough money. I live comfortably. I have what I need. My freedom, my… you. That comment Warren made…”
He’d made many; you took a sip.
“Is that our future?”
“No.” You broke in. “Warren’s an idiot and a jerk.”
He looked right through you. “Are you doomed to be my accomplice? Will you allow me to break and pillage and ruin while looking the other way because you care?”
“Donnie…”
“And the aftermath!” Something about the way he looked at his mug made you think he might pour it over his head. “To keep you separate is to keep you at bay. Allowing you close endangers you. I cannot undo what I’ve done. That is my life!”
You set your mug aside and crossed the space to hold his forearm.
The liquid in his cup vibrated outward.
“Hey.”
This time he saw you. “I don’t want that for you. For us. For our kids.” He gasped on the admittance and choked looking away. “I like it. I do. I enjoy it. I know it. I’m good at it, but-!”
You took his drink and set it aside.
“Do I do all those things because it’s all I know? Like that fucking worm… Like… a wheel. I’m trapped on a wheel and I was supposed to live. How long have I been stuck-!?” He wheezed.
You rose to your knees and wrapped your arms around his neck.
He held you and sank against your form. “I’ve been trying to parse it out, but I no longer know what’s real.”
You squeezed harder and he reached up to claw into your shirt.
“I’m scared.” He admitted with a heave and you felt the droplets seep into your clothes.
You held tight.
He’d never once admitted that.
Even after you’d been kidnapped, he never used those words.
He pulled you into his lap and buried himself down into the safety of you with only the plip plop of his running tears as a signal he was still present.
You refused to let go.
“I can only think to try.” His voice became shredded, warped and raw. “Start with the smallest, most superfluous holding in my portfolio and shut it. Tend the power vacuum and see how I feel. Will I experience loss? Will I care? Will I even notice?”
You stroked his carapace.
“I need to find out. I need to be sure before I do anything else. Before my declaration. Before I marry you. Before we move even a single step further forward. For me, for you.”
“You first.” Your own voice had a broken quality.
“Me first.” He agreed.
“I-” He teetered.
You found his chin and lifted him to eye level. “Not until you’re sure.”
He smiled through a shallow weep and touched the tip of his beak to your nose.
-
Compared to any other version of Donnie’s planning stages, this was something else entirely. He was under his own microscope and you could tell every move was one carefully scrutinized. It left him operating slowly and deliberately. He was hyper aware of each action and reaction to the point where you were sure something was penning down his existence with millisecond timestamps. He existed only as a written caricature, something without freewill that was only allowed to work within a script.
It was hard to watch.
A journey of self-discovery, he had to go about it alone.
You didn’t even know how to help even if you were allowed.
He was in a liminal space where the not knowing shredded him further. He held himself in such high regard and you had seen, first hand, what unknowns did to him. A whole spectrum of reactions, he’d gone the distance and yet still resided at a mysterious point. You were the sure thing in his life while everything else he’d known fell apart. You knew your part was played, something of a shepherd leading a weary traveler. You’d met while he was already on his journey, following a trail toward a life that was truly his own and he’d appeared on your field. There you had walked beside him to your boundary line and this marked the point where he would have to continue his quest alone.
You never left the fence.
You stared after his form no matter how tiny it got on the horizon.
The fact his path deviated was a far greater choice than any he’d ever been presented with. It was one, in fact, that he had thought was fully removed from him. Damned from an early age, he saw one trajectory of his life possible until that road lost pavement and turned to rubble. Soles cut and rotted flesh from neglect, he’d meant to die of his malady, but carrying on had widened his course.
Only he never looked up.
He stared down at the slog of his feet.
You’d been there when his lids had first cracked and the full sight of his existence was one wider than he could comprehend.
He tried to force it, but it blinded him.
He couldn’t have it all.
A crossroads represented not only his choice in the matter, but that there was a greater existence possible for him.
The layered options overwhelmed him and their potency stripped him of his sense of self.
A vessel repaired, he stumbled forward not knowing which direction would be one that got him to his goals.
He’d wanted peace to work.
He acquired it.
He’d opened himself to love.
It was his.
He sought pleasure, big and small.
They were within his grasp, often and always.
What was left?
He didn’t so much lay out his business structure as he pinpointed what needed to be done. A dark that was meant to keep you safe, he gave you an itinerary. He would leave for the Hidden City on Monday and had projected a week to take care of letting this one business go. It meant laying low and moving under guise so as not to alert the authorities or competitors of his existence there. Somewhere he was wholly unallowed, he still had significant reach in that no one threatened his work even when he couldn’t be present.
That speaking largely to what he’d wanted and achieved, you had a certain awe for your mate.
He was an unstoppable force and though you knew he wasn’t unbreakable, it helped your faith in that he would make it through this.
He’d reach the other side.
He’d get his answer.
He’d return to your field, take your hand, and carry on with you in tow.
Until then, he would approach his business partners and contacts for this particular field and walk them through new procedures. Not expressively telling them he was removing himself, they would instead be under a child-like guise. One where you tell one parent the other said this and the other guardian the opposite, both parties would think responsibility was covered and they’d be none the wiser until they spoke.
Donnie estimated that they wouldn’t realize for at least a month and by that time the new system would be a stabilized one where they would simply accept he wouldn’t need them.
Their big mouths were the only thing left to chance. In the underworld, information reigned as the most important asset. Without that there was nothing to gain. You made no money without knowing its source. You held no power without holding something coveted. You were nothing to fear if you had no back up. The best case scenario were these contacts grew slovenly in their new positions and didn’t pipe up to ruin a good thing when the tyrant Donatello handed you gold on a silver platter.
It was the easiest of the sins while the others dictated the worst roads that could be taken.
Pride and bragging of having supposedly pulled one over.
Gluttony in thinking they could grab more.
Wrath that they were tricked.
Envy of one another and a vie to take full control.
Lust to use their growth as one alluring to conscript more onto their sides.
Greed in selling his weakness out.
Time would tell and Donnie was going to also strengthen certain protective holdings, as he called them, so as the filth would stay in the rotten city he despised.
You believed in him because he believed in you.
One week.
Seven days.
Technically 8 because he was due to arrive back first thing Monday morning.
You turned to your own plans.
You already knew you would need to keep busy. With Donnie out and wearing himself down both in a place that wanted his extermination along with all the danger the job itself entailed, you were ready to be a wreck. Communication wasn’t off the table this time, but it was a dodgy thing. He himself had been the one to wire the Hidden City for surface communication, but only so many Yokai cared to adapt. Usually only the ones that crossed the barrier wanted it, so connection points were relatively scarce and more often than not he wouldn't have service.
He promised you he would try to at least check-in once a day.
That would come in a variety of forms depending on his state, but even that wouldn’t be a guarantee or alarm.
You had to trust him to come back to you.
You did.
He didn’t pack and he bid you farewell clad in one of his convertible villain pieces. Dark layers that concealed both a litany of weapons and armor, there was little to hug that was actually him. You settled for what you could which ended up being slung high around his head and he had kissed you in stages.
Desperation.
Longing.
Love.
The last lingered with promise which he trailed to your ear to whisper not reassurances, but his affections. Everything save the titular confession, you held him in to press foreheads and noses before releasing him. He committed you to memory, brought his scarf up to hide himself, thought enough to lower it so you could see his parting smile, and left.
You were alone.
You had work.
You had also gotten ready for it too soon.
It meant you had little to do and ended up at first pacing the apartment. Looking for even the tiniest spot to maybe put something neglected away, you found little. Your deep cleaning had been done not too long ago. The most you found was one errant piece of mail that only needed to be moved from the kitchen counter to a sorting bin on Donnie’s desk and you were left with nothing more to do. You decided to text Shelly. When you had made your plans with him for tonight, you’d realized all too quickly that you’d only ever reached out to him via your tech gauntlet. You’d felt infuriated having had to ask Donnie for his number, but when you texted to automaton the revelation, he only chuckled and said it hadn’t occurred to him either.
You: You up?
Shelly: File that under the ways to start a booty call
You: Why do you choose violence at all hours?
Shelly: I take after my papa
You: Alright, I see how it is
Shelly: ☹️
You: Just checking in about tonight
Shelly: Ah dad just left I see
You: Please!
Shelly: You only ever text me when you’re lonely 😭
You: I do not! Since I got your number I’ve been sending you all kinds of stuff
Shelly: …
You: ?
Shelly: I GUESS!
You: Gotcha
Shelly: But yeah we’re still good. Want me to sleep over?
You paused and stared down at your phone.
You: That’s sad
You: Sleepover with your mom just cause dad’s on vacation?
You: Makes me sound like some elderly person who’s been with their spouse for like 30 years and is going to die of heartbreak
Shelly: Cause he died and left you all alone with the farm house!
You: Hey!
You: NO
You: SHELLY
Shelly: FUCK
Shelly: I DIDN’T MEAN IT LIKE THAT
Shelly: WAIT STOP GO BACK
You: YOU GO BACK WTF
You: YOU SAID IT!
The next message you got was a video of S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. making a rectangle with his hands before one of the mechanical arms of his came into frame and sliced the box in half.
You: what was that?
Shelly: It wards off bad luck!
You: It better!
Shelly: Sleepover to make up for it? 😀
You: Spoiled brat
A digital sticker appeared of S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. snickering and it distracted you all the way to work as you found out he had an entire set of emotes based on himself. Working in tandem with shotty service on public transit, you got the pack uploaded to your phone.
Work took over next. There was a busy enough load of things to do and they were just interesting enough to be distracting. Your ex-roommate Coral checked in around lunch under the guise of making fun of you and you ended up talking to her on speaker perched somewhere outside while you ate. It was a bit too cold for it, but the conversation kept you warm.
The afternoon tumbled away and eventually you were on your way home. Shooting a message to S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. that you were inbound, you found a shadow figure exuding way too much energy standing right outside your apartment.
“Someone’s going to call the cops on you.” You folded your arms behind him.
S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. turned with a bright glowing smile. “They already did! Mrs. Kaczmarek!”
“Of course it’d be her…” You wilted before something buoyed you concurrently. “You didn’t talk to her did you!?”
“Nah.” He pointed up the building. “She was staring at me through the blinds so I waved.”
You caught his arm through the sleeve of his big jacket. “She cannot see you go into my apartment!”
“Why?” He tilted his head with genuine curiosity.
“She thinks me and Donnie are living in sin! I don’t know what she’ll do with the whole kid thing!”
He snorted. “I’m gonna introduce myself.”
“No! Didn’t you hear me!?” You meant to tug him, but he scooped you up like the bag he had under his other arm.
Hanging your limbs in indignity, you glowered at him as he merrily skipped up the steps with loud percussive metal thumps. “Let’s spin it! Donnie is a single father widower!”
“I can walk!”
“This is more fun!” S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. sang as he ascended the steps two at a time. “Okay anyway, so he had me way too young and it was all a mix up and omigosh what if you guys were high school sweethearts and you had a tryst, but then my fake mom passed me off as yours and also you were conscripted into the mafia and then it’s enemies to lovers!”
“What have you been watching?!” He set you down when you reached your apartment’s floor.
“Telenovelas. Wait, why?” He paused to think.
You yanked the bag out of his hand in a fit of retaliation but immediately wilted under his weight. “Holy shit!”
“Ah!” S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. shouted more for sympathy and caught both you and the bag.
“What is this!?” You stared up at him.
“My pajamas.” He checked you over.
“Pajamas?” You unfolded the top and screeched as S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N.’s lifeless head appeared as the contents.
A metal hand clamped over your mouth. “Okay, I’m gonna own that it’s been pretty funny keeping your heart rate up, but the bag thing wasn’t meant to be part of the joke!”
You hummed ‘what do you mean?’ as loud as you could against his paw.
“It’s just my drone body. I was going to switch to it so I can fit in bed with you. I’m pretty sure I exceed the weight limit like three times over in this body.” He let go slowly. “Pajamas? Get it?”
You pinched his hat and yanked him down to eye level. “Punishment! No scary movies!”
“Mom!!” S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. whined loud and long.
“Mom?” Mrs. Kaczmarek’s distinct voice came from down the hall.
“Fuck.” Your eyes widened and you didn’t have to look to know she was headed your way.
“Language!” Mrs. Kaczmarek huffed and you heard her shuffling footsteps.
“Mafia?” S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N.’s brows wiggled digitally.
You glared mania right into his eyes. “Big brother program and you’re weird. That’s final.”
S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. clucked happily as the old woman cornered you.
-
After S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. had dragged you out early for breakfast the next day, you bid him farewell on your way to work. He had a multi-day tournament that would be keeping him busy the next few days and Coral was next on your docket. Another working grind smoothed out the edges of your sanity and you ended up meeting her for an impromptu dinner. On her dime, you were relentlessly teased for being codependent which then rolled over into how badly you’d fail at long distance. You did your best to defend yourself, but when you got a ping from Donnie, the speed at which you’d scrambled to your phone only confirmed all her points.
You didn’t even care to defend yourself as the single purple heart in your message chain was one that sent your spirits sky high.
It inadvertently ruined her fun in the process and you were invited back to her place for drinks.
Now onto more genial conversation, you’d entered your old apartment to find your nervous friend Nelson, bent over the oven with the frilliest apron you had ever seen covering his torso.
He lifted up with a tray of cookies and, as you both roasted him, he defended himself saying form didn’t matter as much as utility.
Still cackling, the conversation shifted to a light hearted one as Nelson continued to bake for a donation sale.
Instead of stumbling home, you crashed in Coral’s bed and she kicked you out bright and early as if she hadn’t been there as your rock for the last 12 hours.
Doing a walk of shame that felt particularly comical since it no longer cracked the top ten of your worsts since meeting Donnie, you felt the first bout of truly missing your boyfriend. Something about walking the streets alone and knowing he wasn’t there or home waiting for you stung. Your shower at your apartment was a sullen one and the trip to work moved at an achingly slow pace.
You: Hey
You: Not sure when you’ll get this
You: Looks like the messages are going through though so that’s good
You: I did not want to relive those stupid red errors
You: I just wanted to say I miss you
You: Hang in there and best of luck ❤️
Staring long at the message chain even when no read receipt came, you pocketed your device as you went to work. A clock in and clock out sort of day, you’d had lunch with your gossipy coworker who you felt like you hadn’t seen in ages. He was the same as always and had many dishes to serve up. Trying to focus on consuming what he offered, who’d been kicked from the #random slack sat in your head like an ear worm until the end of the day where tonight marked the resurrection of game night. One where you only knew your chill friend Kaleb, as the host, and his board game obsessed friend, D-Kline, the rest of the attendants were new to you and you hoped keeping up with the crowd would offer a better distraction.
The night had been one of hotly debated conspiracy theories which went well with the game where you had to oust the player who was a secret villain.
The imagery was thankfully one that only nipped at your heels.
Home came especially dark when you clicked on the light and the lived in feel of the space was one that felt synthetic.
Another sleep would fast track you to Thursday which led to Friday. Both days you’d been unable to fill, you’d be on your own and, for that fact alone, you didn’t want to go to bed. You ended up staying up until the wee hours of the morning scrolling and feeling worse for it mentally and physically. It made the next day an absolute slog and a part of you enjoyed the suffering.
It was hard to think about being lonely when your head was pounding relentlessly.
Getting home came with crashing on the couch and waking sometime late. A devastating blow to your sleep schedule, you ate something microwaved for dinner. Consuming it standing in a dark kitchen, you checked your phone as almost an afterthought to find yesterday and today’s messages from Donnie.
Donnie 💜: As busy as I am, I also have time on my hands. It gives me the space necessary to consider what I must. Though manufactured for such purpose, I care little for it. Introspection is not something I’ve ever had the luxury to entertain and going about it alone has been trying.
Donnie 💜: I want to know I am doing this for the right reasons and I can’t help but think of you when I attempt to consider what those are.
Donnie 💜: I miss our bed.
Donnie 💜: I miss your scent.
Donnie 💜: Your smile.
Donnie 💜: My chest aches.
Donnie 💜: I should have taken more photographs.
And.
Donnie 💜: You have not responded and I hope that is because you are busy.
Donnie 💜: Take care of yourself.
You stared long at his messages until you felt weepy.
Squeezing your lids shut in an attempt to turn off the main for waterworks, you typed out a lengthy explanation of all the things you had been doing to keep busy. Veritable walls of text, you hoped that would give him some distracting material so he wouldn’t have to suffer completely alone with his thoughts.
You knew that curse all too well.
You punctuated the whole thing off with something short and liminal.
You: I’ll dream of you tonight, meet me there
You lowered your phone and felt exhausted at the prospect of having to prepare for bed when a little vibration in your hand caught your attention.
Donnie 💜: I will try as hard as I can.
With your phone crushed to your chest you drowned in your love for him.
Washing up, changing, and getting into bed, you lay in the middle with your body turned toward his side. There you conjured a ghost of him, the one you knew long and well. You willed him to your subconscious. Transferring residuals of his essence that must have been left behind, you focused all your thought on bringing his memory with you to the dreaming world.
You woke after a night of empty sleep.
It stung.
With little will, you prepared for the day which felt like sand falling through your fingers. All too fine for you to hold, it trickled between meetings and calls. Through the cracks of your mailbox and debris in the bottom of your water bottle, you refilled it only to disrupt the silt. It manifested tiny pebbles in your shoe that no amount of shaking could rid. It made seats in public transit craggy ones and as you entered your apartment you dropped to the floor with dramatics at the thought of having to repeat that process.
You fell asleep on the couch with a movie blaring all night.
The next morning, Friday, you barely made it through your routine and had started to berate yourself for your theatrics. The voice grew louder as you exited the apartment and you saw, but didn’t respond to a few messages from friends. Donnie’s daily message had been lost to yesterday’s sieve and you soured further. Your aura read one to keep away and that only exaggerated your loneliness.
You ate alone.
You worked alone.
You went home alone.
You were done.
Done with work and done with distractions, you fell into self loathing.
Five days?
There were people who lost their loved ones for lifetimes.
They carried on.
You felt pathetic and small.
A fury misplaced, you couldn’t send it to your partner because he was trying to maneuver something monumental.
That left you the punching bag and with it came takeout.
Far too much and way too expensive, you ate pure grease and turned on trash TV. Soon yelling at those pandering, you fell asleep sitting up and buried amongst blankets and Styrofoam.
When you woke up with a start the next day, it came with wiping fingers and leaving greasy marks on your shirt.
You forewent cleanliness in an attempt to wallow.
A crawling sensation of oil coating you inside and out, your phone was your magical friend that could bring more food without you having to move much.
Counting 23 steps from your spot on the couch to the door, you lapped that on the return trip to devolution with TV and a dripping to-go boxes.
Your frame of mind shifted with your meal.
You would have this.
You would let yourself mourn that which wasn’t even gone.
Why fight it?
You were allowed to be sad your boyfriend had left.
You weren’t supposed to trust your thoughts and feelings from late at night.
Everything was a process.
When was the last time you’d become a vegetable?
The terribly named cheat days were supposed to be a thing.
They kept you even and sane.
There was nothing wrong with indulgence as long as it was done in moderation.
You put yourself on a timeline.
You could live this way through Sunday if you wanted.
Then you were going to boil everything for safety.
You’d welcome Donnie back as if you hadn’t fallen off the wagon momentarily.
You’d tell him what happened.
Maybe later.
Way later.
After you knocked him clean to the floor and hung off him like a koala for say five to six straight hours.
You’d get your fill and then open up.
Donnie 💜: Switch in progress, results tentatively promising
You felt like you weren’t present in this world when you got the message.
A ground ball that you dove for, you came up dusty from it, but satisfied you’d staved off a run.
It felt like a cosmic truth.
You were okay.
Your feelings were valid.
Things would work out.
The Indian food you’d gotten for dinner was lethally delicious.
This time the food coma you put yourself in was a willing one.
No guilt, only decadence, you were cradling a far too large slab of garlicy naan and chewing on one end like a cow with cud. Saturday evening entertainment came in the form of a television show about a burnout trying to make their way. With bigger narratives obviously edging into the plot, you binged through season one and two before you felt yourself losing lengths of dialog. The bread on your chest had gone, but its scent and weight lingered.
A confusing ghost, you fell to the side, kicking napkins and tissues away until your own blanket acted as your pillow and you were the wad of gum stuck inside. Characters kept talking, they were relentless in that way, and your lids fell with the dialog feeding ticker tape into your dreams. Coming out your ears on a steady pump, the click clack of the printer was a metronome that dictated your heartbeat.
There was the distinct click of the door.
You cracked your eyes and saw a TV logo appearing and disappearing on a screen long fallen asleep.
Blue light bathed your form and you sat up to hear something soft like the weight of a bag hitting the floor.
Slow to turn, you found a large silhouette standing in the doorway and eating up darkness like a growing mass.
Without definition and somehow not rim lit by the television, you squinted at the mannequin and how it was half bent in setting a messenger bag down.
“Wrong… apartment…?” You ventured to the apparition.
“Y/N…?” Donnie’s voice came from it.
You stared as the being stood straight.
Silence beat dehydrated percussion in your ears.
“Did you…?” You asked and were interrupted by a wave of nausea.
You felt repulsive.
What a time for him to finally show up in your dreams.
He stepped towards you and you sort of registered one of his hands raising up to his face. “Did I what? Why are you sleeping out here-?”
You blinked one at the rude manifestation of your boyfriend.
Your mind had gone for a portrayal that was a bit too accurate.
You wanted dream Donnie to whisk you away on a white horse.
“What is that smell?” He gagged and finally took on close enough clarity to highlight that he had pulled his scarf down.
You might have been mad if you weren’t trapped by his face.
Lit from below, his hollowed out eyes were cast in a worse light. Pupils thin and lifeless, they sat atop eye bags that were triple the natural ones baked into his body from years of neglect. From around his scarf, his cheeks sunk against his features and there was visible grease blotched and giving his already green complexion an even sicklier hue. “You look like shit.”
“You smell like it.” He stared down at you.
You had to squint one last time before you pulled your arm from your cocoon.
Pinching your shoulder, you winced at the jolt of pain before turning up comprehension to your partner.
He softened a little around his scrunched beak.
In what felt like exactly three moves, you unearthed yourself, climbed straight up the back of the couch, and launched yourself at him.
He caught you with open arms and you both collapsed onto the floor where you wiggled until all of you was wrapped around him.
“What are you doing here?!” You yelled into his tympanum. “It’s Saturday still, right?! Did I miss it!? Did I sleep through Monday!?”
He squeezed you hard around the center until you squawked with pain. Then he went a calculated slack before his digging digits held you close to him with no intention of letting go. “It’s technically Sunday. 1:07am when I unlocked the door. I…”
You rose up and he relented from cupping the back of your head to holding your cheek.
You kissed him.
He returned it in earnest.
“Donnie…” You cooed against his mouth and he sealed the sound back up.
Now drinking each other in, you felt him shudder as he licked into you and you could only imagine the sour taste. You hadn’t properly showered since Wednesday and your teeth had gone unbrushed for at least 24 hours. Breaking every one of his cardinal rules and only seeming to care on some subconscious level, he nipped at you to get your attention back.
You.
He wanted you.
Even in this state.
You kissed him hard enough down into the floor that it clicked his skull against the ground. He cared little and hoisted you up further, trying to keep all of you held as you made out. Taking time and then some, you eventually broke with a gasp where lightheadedness said that you had gone way past some reasonable point and your usual sensors for self-preservation were offline if only to have more of him.
His beak twitched with repugnant scents and you rooted down to tug messily at his scarf. It loosened and revealed musky skin where sweat had been long baked in. It made you remember he’d left in the same outfit he had now returned in and you licked a fat stripe over his pulse to taste the salt and sour of neglect.
“Acting all high and mighty.” You tutted against him and began to work a hickey into the flesh despite knowing it probably wouldn’t work.
He gave his first chirp.
You immediately sank your teeth into his throat without holding back.
His knees kicked up and slammed into your ass as he gave you a honed chirp.
“Fuck!” His limbs went loose.
You removed your fangs and mouthed satisfaction.
“Me?” He grunted, shoving up your dirty pajamas to feel the skin of your back. “You were busy. You were taking care of yourself. What happened?”
“I was.” You broke from his skin with a pop and pressed a wet kiss to the underside of his chin. “Then I got lonely.” You returned to your spot and sucked as hard as you could.
He quaked beneath you. “W-wait…!”
You relented only enough to talk against his skin. “What?”
“Are you alright though?” He pet you with worry.
“Now, I am.” You gave up your mark to kiss his neck tenderly. “I missed you so much.”
“I missed you.”
“You say it so easily.” You tempered your voice to speak against his head.
“There’s been a change.”
“Oh?” You lifted up to see him.
Though it pained him, he pleaded with you. “Shower. We must shower. Together. Has to be together and now.”
“Fine, but you talk while we do it.”
“That was implied.” He gave the barest smile before your whole world shifted.
Now bundled in his arms, he carried you with a bouncy step to the bathroom. He deposited you next to the sink and you watched him prepare your toothbrush. Passing yours over and then getting his, you shared coy glances in the mirror. As soon as you were done, but right before you could spit, it had clearly been too long because he dipped down and forced his minty mouth against yours.
The kiss pushed you into the wall and you made a little spindly moan.
He retreated with a dry heave and was forced to scrub his mouth out a second time before he finally rinsed.
You followed soon after and fluttered your lashes at him as you spit.
He looked away with a gag and gave a stubborn grunt.
“I gross you out.” You teased him and he went only far enough to turn the shower tap on.
“The horror…” He said without emotion and caught your waist.
“You still want me though.” You leaned in sweetly.
What you thought was a tender move was immediately subverted because he’d actually caught your shirt and yanked it straight up, muffling you.
“Hey!”
“Feel free to return the favor.” He pulled too hard which snapped your arms up.
Even you could smell your body odor.
It caused him to slow, where his pupils changed sizes and your shirt fall like an afterthought to the ground. “Odd…”
“What?” You caught one end of his scarf and pulled so it choked him.
He snorted, wheezed, and wiggled his fingers up into the threads to loosen it. “Your scent.”
“I stink. I got that much.” You were undoing buttons on his outermost layer which you had never realized was a cardigan.
“Filth should deter your natural scent, meaning it should be repulsive but…” He was clearly trying to follow some line of thought, but you got his top undone and shoved backward.
He shook with a form of whiplash and countered by rocking back to shove your bottoms off.
Now nude, you gazed into his eyes where he’d dropped to your level.
He caught the back of your neck to save it from the force of his kiss.
A wet one, it spoke of salvia and how you’d made his mouth water.
You curled into him and despised the layers he still had on as it separated you.
He found it just as annoying because he released and together you both stripped him in a stumbling mess.
He nearly fell into the shower as you whipped the curtain back and chased his unstable form into the warm spray.
Both instantly lulling at the sensation, you pressed together to enjoy it at the same time. A fire smothering flame, it held a heated tiding that reminded you that you were together and that was the point. It shifted to tender touches, drinking in the moisture on each other’s skin as you both reached for soap. Washing each other without pretext, you would often find yourself simply leaning against him for the sake of it. He churred loud enough to beat the nozzle and, as he mapped out the lengths of your skin, he tapped his beak against nearly all points as if to leave unseen pieces of himself behind.
By the time you exited, you had found there was a limit to what had prior been an endless stream of hot water from Donnie’s systems.
You dried off in fluffy towels and Donnie looked like he’d collapse from satisfaction at the slightest provocation. Wanting only to pamper him further, you showed him his muscle cream. He went to take it, but you pulled back to indicate you wanted to apply it. It pricked his eyes with happy tears that he squeezed away and offered you his arm. Working the solution into his neglected muscles, it was with such great comfort that his churrs broke. Imagining them on some supersonic level, you moved in an overflowing silence to get his other arm, neck, and finally his carapace.
He was without bones as you finished and you had to act as his walker to get him to bed.
He looked like he might say something, but was teetering in and out of consciousness as you sat him on the edge of it.
You gave a soothing hum and got a hold of clean wraps.
This time he was completely malleable in offering his limbs.
With the best approximation of the many times you’d seen him wrap himself, you applied them one slow rounding at a time.
It brought his churrs back and by the time you secured his neck, he kissed you with sweetness.
“Marry me.” He mumbled between brushes to your lips.
You were equally drunk on the moment, you relished the little way your lips tried to cling to each other. “What…?”
He only kissed you more, in a way that spoke of need and pulled you into the bed.
Falling to his side, he turned right into you to give chaste press after chaste press and stroked your cheek for good measure.
You spent what must have been hours like that until exhaustion kept him from reciprocating.
Laying the wrong way in bed, you pulled up the bottom sheets to cover him the best you could.
He gave that honed chirp unprovoked and you kissed him with the desperation it always conjured. “What is that, Donnie? Please…?”
“You’ve… never asked…” He told you as his hand ghosted over your form as if to absorb your energy.
“Tell me now?” You pressed the tip of your nose to his beak.
“Mating call.”
You blinked wide, looking at him up his snout.
“For my mate.” He spoke, almost cheeky and stole another kiss.
Your heartbeat a little too fast and you found yourself cuddling into him.
“Mate.” He confirmed again and this time you found him checking your pulse to feel how your heart skipped a beat.
“You asked me to marry you.” You spit without venom.
He had the audacity to chuff. “There’s no way.”
“You did. Tonight, or… uh, this morning. Not that long ago.”
“I did not.” He gave a gentle pressure to your arm to make you look up at him.
You saw a dash of fear swirled into worry and fatigue in his gaze. “You did…”
“No…” His expression grew grave.
“Donnie.”
“That can’t be. Let me take it back.” He gave a faint growl as he rolled you over to hang above your head. “I didn’t!”
“Don.” You couldn’t help but giggle.
“Don’t laugh! Before I’ve said I love you?! Do you know the amount of planning I’ve had in place!? To work up to this?! I refuse to waste it on-on-on being mildly out of sorts at most!” His eyes darted wildly and without source. “Erase it! You will forget that you ever heard-!!”
You stared up at him with a watery expression that you were trying very hard to contain.
“Did…? Did I…?” He hung, mortified, above you.
You could only nod and tried to hide your mouth.
He tipped once, then twice, before his body came down around you in a whine. “I’m a mess!”
You moved deliberately in petting his carapace.
His churrs were weak and sad.
You thought against his head for a moment before summoning your strength. He felt the tide of your body shift and turned to study you curiously. Surely only seeing your face puckered, you breathed in as deep as you could and mustered the sound only he’d been able to produce.
You gave your approximation of the mating call.
Before the sound fully left you, his lips were on yours and his tears met your cheeks to escape.
You held him tight and returned the fervor.
“You-” He broke the lip lock as if to scold. “You-you-!”
You held his head so you could send him a honeyed gaze.
He shook your frame with a deafening mating call and kissed you deeply.
Melting into one, he slowed with reluctance to pull you the right way into bed. There you snuggled down together, giving pecks where possible to soothe the need until you were wound into a singular form.
“We were silent all during the washing. It was supposed to be a given, but I haven’t given my explanation…” He lamented.
“Now or later?” You nuzzled his throat.
He gave a faint hum. “I rushed my return home.”
You pursed your lips and pulled away to view him.
“I couldn’t stand another day without you.”
“Coral says we're codependent.” You told him while stroking his plastron.
“After this showing…?” Donnie’s brow ridge lifted in what had once been his patented look.
“I think… I mean I was in a dark place for a day, but… I don’t know. I think we’re fine. We do live our lives separate, but together. So what if we don’t want to be apart long term? Isn’t that why we’re dating?”
He gave a faint smile and kissed your forehead. “Which day was dark, my heart?”
“Friday…” You tucked your leg further where it was between his.
You felt his tail curl against your skin as if to hold you. “Then four days is too many. Three will be the max from now on.”
You couldn’t help the little jolt of joy that gave you.
It must have felt similarly for him because he gave you a bubbling peck.
You hummed content and he returned it with a similar chirp.
You gave your mating call.
He returned it with his.
You shoved into him and he welcomed you close.
“How were you?” You asked, settling into his scent.
“Let’s say it was all dark.” He spoke into your temple.
“I thought there was a change?”
He gave an affectionate chirp and nuzzled you. “There has.”
You slid a hand up to his neck to feel his pulse.
It beat evenly for you. “It was around the same time as yours. Before I gave my progress note. Days spent in the slums. Breathing the rancid air I once favored… I… I suppose it is at your lowest you receive the best perspective.”
“Donnie-”
“I know…” He kissed an apology for cutting you off. “I must learn the hard way it seems.”
You gave a reluctant nod.
“I don’t like that way of life, experiencing it now. If distilled, I suppose I like controlled chaos. I like knowing an outcome. I like watching the world burn, but… I don’t believe I prefer it by my hand. Call it entertainment as it would need to be a collapse that doesn’t affect you in the slightest.”
You leaned up where you were tucked under his chin.
He stroked your spine. “I did not sleep once the entirety of the time I was gone. Not for lack of trying, but it was as if my body could not rest knowing it was without yours.”
Your eyes closed.
“Hallucinations came at a certain point. I am built for higher tolerance, but that does not mean my mind does not slip.”
You slipped your fingers into the hinge of his shell.
He squeezed you lightly. “Nothing to fear. Can I share with you what I saw?”
You forced yourself to hear the first half of his sentence. “What?”
“I saw you. I saw us. I saw memories. I saw things yet to come…” He trailed off and you could feel him smiling. “I saw happiness that I was worthy of.”
You held him close.
He dipped his lips to press your forehead. “My truest desire was not one of ruin. It was working in my lab, you visiting me with a stroller. A life full.”
“Those loose lips of yours.” You kissed his neck. “You’ve brought up babies a few times now. What happened that being only pillow talk?”
“Would you like kids?”
“With you?”
He gave a single offended grunt. “Who else?”
“We might need to adopt…” You leaned your worries into him.
The blood test.
Negative.
Not for a lack of trying.
There was the catchall of his birth control, but you weren’t sure if that was really the only cause.
He seemed unaffected. “The child would still be ours.”
You snapped your head up to see him.
“It would still be with me.” He spoke reassurance.
You kissed him. “Yes, someday.”
He lingered against it. “I’m withdrawing from the Hidden City completely. I’ll transfer all my holdings. I’ll cherry pick my successors. I will go only legitimate… with more than a few offshore accounts.”
“I thought you weren’t allowed…?”
“I’m not allowed to fully quit. I will forever be a sort of target, but I also know the system better than anyone. I was raised by it. If I restructure everything and leave no one wanting, they will be less inclined to come after me.”
“It sounds easy, but-��
“It will not be. This will be an extremely dangerous, arduous, tedious, and a miserable change. Any other version of me would despise how flagrant I’m being. Needlessly selfish. I’m spitting in my own face.”
You studied him before stroking his jaw and smiling. “You’re morally grey.”
He bobbed with laughter. “I like that.”
“Yeah?” You moved to kiss him.
He took your lips, greedily. “Very much so.”
“You’ll be happy?”
“I am happy.”
You swam in a light blush. “I meant doing this. This is… huge… Donnie, this has been your life.”
He sighed. “Unfortunately, I will kick and scream. I may also have to bend our rules and commit a few vile acts. A show of power even in retreat is a potent one.”
“You’re going to kill?” You stared at him knowingly.
“A few… It is yet to be seen, but I imagine… five…? Or so tops…?” He grimaced.
“Only if necessary.” You leaned into him with a shake of your head.
“Of course.”
“I… I’m not sure how to feel. If this is what you want, you know I support you, but it feels…?”
“Surprising? Sudden? As if this isn’t actually occurring?”
“That and way more.”
“It has been a drawing culmination. I feel as though I am dangling from an invisible thread. I am sure I am held as I haven’t fallen, but it seems improbable that I have not died.”
You tried to picture that.
“I suppose I could have… What an interesting choice of afterlife for someone such as me…” He flicked his gaze and caught your lips.
You kissed back his comedy.
“My concerns are my own. Overall, I have full confidence. You cinched it.”
“Me?”
“Seeing you. I have spent all this time back in my natural habitat unsettled. Miserable. Plagued by insomnia. Taking no pleasure in my favorite game of manipulation.”
You gazed into his eyes.
There was only truth in them. “The moment I stepped into our home, all that ill will evaporated. I was whole again. Immediately soothed. I believe that is why I enjoyed the hacking and the destruction of the double date. I had you by my side.”
“You like being bad with me?” You asked with a light tease.
“I like being anything with you.” He bumped his beak to your nose. “However, I did take that into account. I played out exercises in which you were my cohort.”
“We’ve played that more than once already.” Your lids lowered.
He lapsed into a momentary churr before clearing it with his throat. “In guise, yes. Enjoyed. Relished. Savored. In reality… I wanted to vomit. The thought of you having to deal with any percentage, no matter how small, of what is required to do of what I have done. Of…” His attention dipped, haunted. “More than what you’ve already suffered.”
You kissed him back to the present.
He came and nuzzled into you. “Never.”
You settled comfortably against his lips.
He pulled away the slightest amount and you felt the flicker of worry. “Unless, of course, that is what you desire…?”
You opened your eyes wide to translate how serious you were. “No. Not even. Heroes and villains… the whole thing is… not good. I don’t… I don’t want to do either. I just want to be me and I just want to be with you.”
You watched emotions march through his ragged form. “You are so sure you won’t make mistakes…”
“I’m not.” You pressed your hands into the plastron over his head. “I’m as scared as anyone else.”
“You’re not scared of me…”
“You’re not a mistake.”
All hitting a breaking point, he enveloped you like a tide. You let the warm waters wash you out to sea where you had no worries for the depths supporting you. They were all known, even if they weren’t, and you had full trust that you and your partner would navigate whatever necessary.
NEXT
Both my betas are getting pummeled with work but they still make time for me! I can't thank @tmntxthings and @thepinkpanther83 enough!!
#weakspotfic#rottmnt#rottmnt donnie x reader#rise of the tmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt x reader#donatello hamato#donnie x reader#rise donnie#rise donnie x reader#rottmnt donatello#rottmnt donnie#me#fanfiction#my fanfiction
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