#regret not taking a screenshot with his body but i was just too excited about the dirigible skin

[its-fjori]

LET ME SOLO HIM!!!!!! I DID IT

[pianokantzart]

Yes please. The first scene of The Mario Brothers sets the tone for their relationship so well, and I’m so glad it carries through the entire film.  Most of the screenshots taken from this posted clip: X

I ADORE THAT THE FIRST SHOT OF THEM IN THE MOVIE IS THEM SIDE HUGGING EACH OTHER. They’re just standing there in front of the television, watching their commercial, two goobers barely able to contain the excitement of what they’ve accomplished together.

The commercial ends, and immediately they start showering each other with complements while teasing each other. “Wow! You were great!” Mario shouts while slapping Luigi’s cap over his eyes.  “I was great? Are you kidding me!? You were great!” Luigi shouts back as he playfully jabs at his brother’s stomach. 

While they’re both proud of the commercial, Mario expresses some minor worries. He says “I’m so glad we spent our life savings on this commercial” as though he was having doubts before, and wonders if the goofy Italian accent was too over the top. But Luigi is fully optimistic, describing their ad as not just some commercial, but true “cinema.” He is about to reassure Mario about the accents too, when the Giuseppe... who naturally has that same goofy over-the-top accent... chimes in to voice his support.

“Well well well...” Then a new voice joins the conversation, and the moment Mario and Luigi hear it the mood changes. Both brothers tense up and turn to look.

In an instant, their instinctual reaction is “Ah fuck, not this guy.” “...If it isn’t Brooklyn’s favorite failures, The Stupid Mario Brothers.”

“Oh great, Spike’s here.” Luigi’s comment is one of passive annoyance. He stays behind his brother, his body language anxious and anticipatory, his expression looking more and more worried the closer he gets to Spike.

“Hey, Spike.” Mario, on the other hand, is assertive. He immediately walks over and stands confrontationally in front of his old boss, arms crossed in front of his chest.

“Yeah. IT’S-A ME!” Spike retorts with an imitation of Mario’s put-on Italian accent and aggressively laughs in his face. He isn’t “annoying but well-meaning” the way Mario’s uncles are, he’s deliberately trying to get under his skin. Mario squints when Spike laughs a little too close for comfort, but otherwise holds his ground and maintains his composure.

Spike wipes a tear from his eye and switches gears from obnoxious mockery to cold belittling. “Tell me, have you even gotten one call since you left me to start your dumb company?”

So right off the bat we learn two things: 1. The Mario Brothers quit Spike’s business, and he’s bitter enough about it that he’s tracked their future endeavors and goes out of his way to make fun of them for it. Clearly there’s an issue of pride here– two little nothings quitting his business to try and make it on their own? Who do they think they are? 2. Mario, in return, is bitter enough about whatever happened while they worked for Spike that he takes the bait and gives Spike the time of day. Luigi looks like he would prefer to dip out of the situation altogether, but he does his best to support Mario when he thinks he’s got a leg up…

While Mario is still taking a breath to form his reply, Luigi summons the courage to step out from behind his brother, looking smug as he waves his cellphone around. “Actually, Spike, we have!”

Mario is excited for a moment until it’s revealed the phone call is from their mom. Luigi is proud enough of her support that he sincerely considers it a bragging point, happily clinging to his sibling all the while Mario is internally begging his brother to stfu.

Then, Luigi mic-drops the phone. It audibly shatters. Instant regret. Mario looks like he’s going to implode from embarrassment.

Spike, naturally, finds this hilarious. Giggling, he grabs a napkin, wipes the pizza grease off of his beard, and lobs the crumpled napkin at Luigi. “Good luck running a business with this idiot.”

With lightning-fast reflexes, Mario reaches out and catches the napkin before it hits its target. The music takes a dramatic shift as the mood of the conversation gets more serious.

“Say that again about my brother, and you’re gonna regret it.” At that point, it might have been smarter for Mario to just throw the napkin in the nearest bin and walk away, but Spike just made the mistake of going at Luigi. Nobody is allowed to treat him like that, not while Mario’s around.

Mario retaliates by throwing the napkin back in Spike’s face, hitting him square in the forehead. Spike does not take this lightly. Where Mario has a sense of basic dignity, Spike has an overinflated ego, and he won’t take even the smallest offense lying down. He rises to his feet, fists clenched, chest puffed, ready for a fight. “Oh yeah?”

Mario also looks ready to throw down, but rather than raise his fists his first priority is to press Luigi out of harm’s way. Luigi, in the meantime, looks terrified, stepping back and bracing himself, his already anxious body language tensing further. Both Mario and Luigi are startled when Spike actually follows through with getting physical, snatching Mario by the overall straps and lifting him up off the ground.

“Get this through your tiny brain Mario: You’re a joke! and you always will be.” Mario doesn’t fight or argue, he just squints as Spike talks uncomfortably close to his face like he’s trying to goad him into throwing the first punch. Mario does not take the bait, and does not give Spike the satisfaction of any reaction at all. When it comes to petty insults like this, he can take them like a champ.

Luigi is shocked into a standstill. His gaze rapidly flicks back and forth between Spike and Mario. He has no idea what to do, he’s just worried about his brother in every sense of the word, taken aback by both the vitriolic comment and threat of an actual fight.

Spike, after getting the final word in, throws Mario to the ground. Luigi drops to his knees and holds out his hands to help his older brother up, but Mario recovers himself before Luigi can assist.

Luigi looks far more hurt by Spike’s insult than Mario, and seems to be calculating what their options are if things escalate any further. Mario holds what little ground he has, staring defiantly up with his hands clenched, as if he’s daring Spike to try something.

Luckily, things simmer down. Spike proudly dusts off his hands and heads toward the door, taking a moment to leave money on the table. He’s an asshat and a blowhard, but he still plays by society’s rules. He doesn’t dine and dash, and he’s not going to carry a confrontation further than he feels he needs to, especially not in a public restaurant. Spike has the potential to win this fight, but at the end of the day he has a business to run.

Despite having been dropped flat on his back, Mario is the first to get up. He straightens his cap and dusts himself off, staring daggers at his old employer’s back while Luigi rises to his feet and begins questioning his brother’s decision. “Are you insane!? He’s three times your size!”

Spike’s insult was cruel, but it clearly didn’t effect Mario too much. It’s more of the same ole same ole from him, and can’t be taken too seriously. Luigi is more concerned about the physical risks involved.

“Luigi, c’mon! I mean, you can’t be scared all the time.” To me, this comment doesn’t feel like Mario criticizing Luigi as much as it feels like Mario defending his own approach to life. Both him and Luigi are young (probably early 20s), little guys working in manual labor. They’re at the bottom of the totem pole, but Mario maintains his sense of pride. He’s eager to fight back against adversity and prove himself to the world, even if it means taking serious risks.

“Mmmm, you’d be surprised.” Luigi, in the meantime, has complete opposite approach when facing life’s challenges. He is not as good at rolling with the punches as Mario, and being very anxious and sensitive by nature, his way of getting along is by avoiding confrontation altogether. 

CONCLUSION: Mario’s strong drive pulls Luigi into situations that go against his instincts, but that’s for the better. If Mario hadn’t been there, Luigi definitely wouldn’t have attempted to talk back to Spike like that. Is he skilled at backtalk? Not in the least, but it’s the spirit of attempting to stand up for himself that counts. Mario gives Luigi room to be vaguely adventurous and assertive by providing protection, clearing the path, and making things easier for him whenever he can.  As a result, Luigi would follow Mario anywhere– and does, supporting him in all of his endeavors with full confidence. There is a reason why Charlie Day described Luigi as “die-hard loyal,” and for someone like Mario, who has gumption, big dreams, and a lot going against him, having someone at his side who sincerely supports and believes in him with all his heart is indispensable.

The beginning shows us a good example right off the bat of Luigi’s confidence regarding Mario’s dreams, and anxiety regarding outside threats. Meanwhile, we see glimpses of Mario’s anxiety regarding his own dreams, and confidence when facing outside threats. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: they really do balance each other out. 

[elmaxlys]

Senya's determination

Images taken as screenshots from magapoke when the chapters were free, text translated from the official French.

Chapter 76

Sniper: Senya... Senya...

Senya: Yes! What is it, Sniper?

Sniper: I'm sorry, but-

Senya: Huh?

Chapter 77

Senya: Ah... Yes, of course... You want to take possession of my body? Just like last time...

Senya: Sniper is thinking about it... I'm ready to die... He's very nice... He wants to occupy my body to help me regain my calm...

Senya: But-

Sniper: What a strong will... Senya, you've changed. I underestimated you and I apologize for that. However, I can feel danger looming over you and that's a fact.

Sniper: You're determined, almost too much. When you were unconscious, you met someone, I know that... What happened?

Senya: Yes, you're right... I came into contact with a being I know almost nothing about. He told me many thing, but I remembered the most important thing: if I don't go to the school, all the ones who are still in it will be killed. Of course I'm determined to go, although I'm not suicidal.

Senya: It's true I might have been a tad too excited, tho... Thanks to you, I think I've regained my calm.

Sniper: It reminds me of that time that boy, Uzuki, lectured me... That's a bad habit of mine... In front of people that confident, I tend to poke my nose where it doesn't belong.

Sniper: Yet it's me who told you to fight.

Senya: By the way, the man told me about that: our encounter, between you and me, was programmed by Taisei. It's apparently nothing to do with chance. I didn't really get the reason. Taisei wanted to make me the "hero" of this world.

Senya: As for my friend Naoki, he was killed by one of Taisei's people... If I want to avenge his death, I cannot flee.

Sniper: The "hero"? I'm missing too much information. You need to tell me more before Taisei watches us again.

[skipping 2 pages bc they're about plot and Taisei]

Sniper: If you win [against Third Stage at the school], everything will be alright. You have my entire trust and I will give you all the support you need.

Sniper: Thanks, Senya!

Senya: I can tell, very precisely, that it's my "existence" I'm risking, and not my life! Every single thing about me could disappear from the universe... But I will live in my friends' memories...

Senya: I'm not trying to sacrifice myself, or anything like that... I know exactly what fits me best! For a long time, I didn't know what I wanted to do... But that's not the case anymore! I want to leave a trace of me in the universe!

Chapter 78:

Senya: I have to make this fight last as long as possible... For Yuri Honjo... I have to surpass myself. Win against the enemy in front of me... Win!! If I don't have such determination, I will get killed for sure!

Senya: I have to save the ones in the school... I have to forget the risks I'm taking!

Senya: I have to focus on the fight!

Senya: This... This is my last fight!

Senya: I don't want to leave any regrets in the universe!

[then Taisei talks extensively about Senya's determination but I'm focusing on what Senya has to say]

Chapter 79:

SFX: crrrk

Sniper: Senya, you okay?

Senya: Yeah, no problem! Just a slight pain to my teeth. [context: he just caught a bullet with his teeth]

Senya: I can hear something... This sound... It's...

Senya: ...the sound of my vanishing.

Senya: I'm ready, I'm not scared... But I would like a little more time... just a little.

[rays-of-fire-and-ice]

BLEACH: The Thousand Year Blood War Ep 10 Reactions and Thoughts

Overall reactions:

Whelp, I don't know about you, but I was an emotional wreck after watching this one. I was so in awe of after watching Kenpachi and Unohana's fight that I forgot Renji and Ichigo were even a thing in this episode. While there isn't too much tot talk about in this one compared to last week's episode, I still just wanted to rant and rave about how much I loved the highlights and talk a little about Unohana's death.

Highlights:

Kenpachi vs Unohana continues and concludes: I cried, I almost screamed, I fell out of my chair again, and I even choked. WHAT A FIGHT! This is right up there with Yamamoto vs Yhwach for sure! There was stunning moment after stunning moment, JUST LOOK AT SOME OF THESE:

The last one in particular just screams 'HYPE!' I love this change from the manga. Even without context, each moment as a gif or as a clip is incredible to watch. You could freeze on most of these frames, take a screenshot, and chances are it'd make an epic screensaver or background. But the part that takes the cake for me is Unohana's bankai reveal. The moment she said 'Bankai', I choked. The seiyuu absolutely killed it, giving Unohana just right amount of menace as she speaks throughout the reveal. And to finally learn what it does, it's the cherry on the cake for me! I was hoping we would get more filler for the first time Unohana and Kenpachi met, but it was still a great moment, and seeing Kenny emerge from the massive mountain of bodies definitely got em hyped. And even though I knew it was coming, I still gasped and started to tear up when Unohana got impaled and Kenpachi threw his sword away. Just, look at this moment and try to tell me you don't feel anything:

Kenpachi's voice actor also did an amazing job throughout this moment, conveying the regret and grief he feels for killing the one person who brought him the greatest fight of his life. And then hearing Kenny's zanpakuto...AAAAAAH! In fact, this adaption was s effective it made me temporarily forget why I wasn't really a fan of why Unohana got killed off. Even when I go back and reread this fight, as much as I love it and looked forward to seeing it animated when the anime was announced, I still hate that Unohana had to die. Yes I know, if we had two kenpachi-level captains the war would probably be over within hours. Yes, I know removing Unohana, a master healer, raises the stakes for the other Shinigami because now who's going to bring them back from near death? Yes, Kenpachi needed some development to become OP as heck for end and finally get that bankai everyone wanted to see, but did it really need to happen by killing Unohana? I think I feel this way because Unohana is one of my favourite characters, and her character got more layers added to her during this fight, only for it to come to an end just as quickly as these layers were revealed. That's just a personal gripe of mine and has nothing to do with animation staff, who not only knocked this adaption out of the park, they blew it out of the water and into the stratosphere.

Renji and Ichigo - aka the dorkiness continues: more silliness with Renji and Ichigo, this time with Oetsu, who makes them do this famous pose:

I only wish we got to see the whole post rather than a pan down, but this still got a laugh out of me. Actually, considering how serious most of this episode was, the silliness was welcomed to offset some of the sadness. That being said, when Ichigo failed to find his zanpakuto and was sent back to the World of the Living, I couldn't help but feel a little hyped for what's come to.

So if I understand right, next week we're getting two episode back to back? Well, regardless, I am VERY excited for the next episode/s. We're getting Everything but the Rain arc, and we all know what that means!! :D

[noitscooldw]

sexting m!kylar hcs

hello everyone!! how do you do! im alli! long time fan first time writer (о´∀`о)

i got inspired by @inkyquince 's sexting w kylar hcs and couldn’tttt help but add on my own h0rny ramblings

so without further adieu, this is ifdolhadcellphones!au

warning: adult content! (obv), afab!pc, breeding and impeg mention

sending

alright so i don't think kylar would send nudes very often but when he does oh boy are they good

gets so hard just thinking abt showing you how much he needs you rn

he wants to prove his love for u and show u how crazy u make him

vids consist of him rubbing himself over his boxers, letting his precum stain and make a mess inside

all you can hear is his sweet little whimpers and mumbling, his breath hot and heavy. he gets a lil too close to the mic sometimes and he almost sounds in pain

lifting up the waistband to reveal his throbbing hard cock, standing up at attention so cute and pathetically

“i-i’ve had this all day..” you can hear him whisper, “all day…”

the camera gets so shaky as he starts desperately pulling on his cock, fucking his precum-covered fist, his small hips moving with the momentum

all he needs to think abt is fucking your sweet little pussy and he’s gone, bursting loads of cum into his hand, imagining going inside your womb

just thinking about cumming in you gets him so riled up, most of his fantasies consist of that anyway but that's a rant for another day :p

but yea, most videos usually end with him moaning your name loudly and cumming all over himself, just for you <3

in terms of d!ck pics, his most common poses are him just holding himself, feeling the weight and heat of his arousal. kinda showcasing his length heh heh (big d kylar supremacy)

also loves to send you pics of the hard ons he gets throughout the day thinking of you, you’re on his mind constantly and he can’t help but get excited, needy in fact

you’ll be at work at the cafe or sumn and get sent a pic of him pulling down his sweats, hard cock straining against his underwear, head leaking through the fabric

“i miss you sooooomuch. when are you going to be home??? i need to see you”

normally would not be so comfortable showing their genitals especially online where anything can get hacked but with you he feels no shame

after all, his body is yours anyways :)

cum pics lovesss sending pics of his cum and how much he came for u “it’s a shame this is going to waste hehe”

makes sure he brings himself right to the brink before he takes a pic so he can look extra needy for u

hands and phone are always sticky

waits on the edge of his seat waiting for u to text back

lowkey regretting it when anxiety hits; what if u don’t like it, what if u find him disgusting and call him a pervert, a freak? maybe he shouldn’t be so forward like this…

but as soon as he hears a ping! and see ur name pop up alongside a sexy pic in return, all his worries wash away

you really are made for him

receiving

kylar is so grateful for modern technology just so you're able to send him nudes

screenshots every single pic you’ve ever sent to him, so you already know he has a whole folder of all ur nudies

definitely password protected and encrypted so no one will ever find them, not on his watch. would go actually insane if that happened.

but you can bet every night he lays down in bed, goes through his favorites (all of them) and just goes to town

definitely cums on his screen to your selfies or any pic of you rlly, like those weird cum tributes on reddit 😭😭

like i said, his phone is very icky and sticky

frothing at the mouth when he gets a sexy pic from you, and always says thank you <3

spends about the next hour and a half furiously jerking off to said pic, whether it’s in the park bathroom or at home in his bed

he just can’t believe he has this in his possession…you’re not sending these to anyone else right???? no no of course not hahha why would you..

still, even the thought of you willingly sending these photos…wanting him to see your body, to see you in such a vulnerable, private state….

ok back to the bathroom

tittie pics has him droooling, he can just feeeel how soft they are through the screen, how sweet they’d taste

“BBEAUTIFUL”

“you lookso amazing my darling!!!!!

“so pretty and perfect and alllll mine”

“cant imgaine how theyd look nice and full of milk…..”

“i want th em in my mouth…please....”

pussy pics have his mouth salivating and his dick trying to escape out of his pants

"FFFGFHFJ Mmmlslfkfkfkfkffiuu"

“holyyyyshitttt hhaaha omgggg!!!!”

“all miNe to Breeed all mine onlyy mine!”

“DONOT show this to anyone okay???????”

"iloveyousofuckingmuch"

[imjusttpeachy]

she's a rae of sunshine (c.h.)

okay so this was a request but i completely read it wrong so i’m gonna write it again but i finished this one anyway so here take it

so sorry to the anon who requested it bc u were so fuckin sweet i’ll have it up asap i promise

playlist

ralph castelli - morning sex

crumb - bones

jorja smith - teenage fantasy

summary: balancing college life and wanting to support your best friends online endeavors was difficult, but reader regrets trying a little harder when she finally meets one of her newer stream-mates

word count: 2, 828

WARNINGS: she/her pronouns used, coarse language, lowkey OOC Corpse, that needs its own warning i’m sorry,

•••

“Look you knew I had to stream before I said you could come over ya fuckin idiot.”

“Yea I knowwwww, I just wanted to spend more time with my super-hot best friend forever.”

Being the best friend of an online personality had its perks— the amazing trips you got to hitch a ride on, the adoring fans that seemed to latch on to you as well, the sponsorships that would always send you something along with the original PR package, and especially the way she was able to choose their own work hours.

Well... mostly.

As much as you adored spending time together during the day, whether it be shopping or going out for brunch, those late nights that always seemed to hold the most memories you held so dear were few and far between. Of course, you couldn’t blame her; responsibilities were responsibilities, and fuck if you’d let your selfish wants override the way she chooses to get her work done. You really couldn’t be one to judge either-- having to call off dates because you’d underestimated the time you needed to complete a school paper, or when a last-minute lab was called in and you’d have to leave her sitting alone in those cafes with your half-finished mocha and a promise to Venmo her the money to cover it later. What left you feeling the most guilty, though, was the fact that you weren’t able to watch her content as much as you’d like to. Sure, you’d catch a few minutes of a stream here and there but any time you spent apart was usually spent with your head buried in a book, mind bleary with countless espresso shots trying to keep your tired eyes focused on the seemingly unending work in front of you.

But, a distraction every now and then couldn’t hurt. Right?

Having had enough of your current assignment, any coherent thought was long gone, you’d decided to pay your favourite person a little visit. You knew she’d probably be busy as she hadn’t replied to your previous text for a few hours, but knowing her presence alone and any passing comments would lift the heaviness that had found its home in your head and chest, you shot her a message to let her know that her office couch would be occupied by you for the next few hours. Normally, you’d just show up so you knew she wouldn’t have a problem with it; so when that fateful message popped up on your phone giving you the go-ahead you completely ignored the warning of her work schedule and drove right over.

So now here you were, sprawled haphazardly on her couch clad in sweats and a sports bra scrolling through your phone as you watched her finish her final touches so she could start her stream.

“You’re gonna be in the background of my face cam if you wanna sit there y’know.” Groaning in response to her warning not wanting to move from the comfy spot you just found, you looked over at her with the best puppy eyes you could muster. She chuckled softly, raising her hands in surrender as she turned back to her setup. “Hey I really don’t care, just warning ya bug. The thirst comments and screenshots are outta my hands.”

Scoffing under your breath at her comment, you turned your head back to your phone as a Twitter notification popped up at the top of your screen.

Corpse Husband: streaming among us in a few mins, join in on youtube

Heartbeat picking up slightly, you scrambled for the purse you’d thrown at the base of the couch for your headphones. Ever since you’d found this handsome-voiced stranger’s channel on your late night horror binges, you had fallen completely in love. While you weren’t typically the type to watch video game commentary outside of Rae, his voice got you completely hooked and you couldn’t get enough of it. Yeah, maybe you were a bit of a simp, but that sweet and genuine personality that hid behind that gravelly tone had you melting completely into his clutches. You tried to convince yourself to get over it, you didn’t even know what he looked like. But, y’know, a little crush wouldn’t hurt anybody right?

“Going live in T-minus 30 seconds babe.” Jumping slightly as Rae’s voice knocked you out of dreamland, you mumbled out a small “got it” as you once again got focused on getting your headphones connected to your phone. You’d never been able to watch one of his lives before, his horror commentary videos usually playing as background noise as you did schoolwork or while you were falling asleep. Practically shaking with excitement, you opened your YouTube app seeing the live at the very top and tapping on it immediately only to be met with that sweet laugh ringing through your headphones like music to your ears. You grinned to yourself, grabbing the throw pillow you had previously tossed to the floor and hugging it to your chest while your eyes remained glued to your phone screen, completely forgetting what was happening around you as you zeroed in on the gravelly tone you’d fallen oh-so in love with.

“Hey (Y/N) wave hi.” You startled slightly as the faint voice of your friend sounded from across the room. Glancing up from your phone, you pulled an earbud from your ear and furrowed your brows at her before slowly processing what she said, lifting a hand in greeting to her watchers. She laughed at your confusing antics, turning slightly in her chair to look over at you. “What the hell are you so smiley about?”

“…Nothing..” You grinned widely as her laugh once again resounded around the room, shaking her head at you before turning back to her screen with a scoff, muttering something under her breath so only her watchers could hear. Smile still plastered across your lips, you settled back down into the comfiness of the couch and popped your earbud back in, zeroing in again on the screen in front of you. Watching as Corpse moved his character around the lobby as he waited for his friends to join, a small giggle escaped from under your breath; trying your best to be mindful of Rae’s stream but not being able to hold back the flustered feeling welling up in your chest, mind giddy with the thought of finally being able to see one of his famous live streams, well, live. It had only been a few seconds later when you heard Rae’s voice once again, only this time, not as muffled as before.

“What’s up motherfuckers.” Brows furrowing in confusion, you lifted your hand to your earbud and pulled it from your ear once again, hearing her voice from across the room but from your other earbud as well. No, there was no fucking way. All your questions were answered, though, as you glanced back down at your phone screen seeing a red character move around the game lobby along with Corpse’s, the gamer tag ‘Valkyrae’ floating just above it. Blinking hard at your screen trying to convince yourself that your eyes were lying to you, you slowly pulled your hand to cover your mouth in shock. How… How could you possibly not know they knew each other? With the way they spoke to each other in sarcastic comments, poking fun at the other it sounded like they were close too. Body finally catching up with your thoughts, you scrambled at your phone, shaky hands moving as quickly as they could to pull up your texts with Rae. Your fingers tapped furiously at the screen, anxious to get back to the live stream to listen in more but also needing to know what the fuck was going on.

TO my rae of sunshine: care to explain what the fuck is going on??! how the fuck do you know corpse husband?????!??!

“Oops sorry guys, guess I forgot to turn off my phone ringer-“ Staring up at the back of her head helplessly, you watched as she picked up her phone seeming to read out the text before bursting into a peal of laughter. Tossing a look at you over her shoulder, you looked back down at your phone bashfully, seeing the three loading dots in your message thread indicating that she was messaging you back.

my rae of sunshine: lol what about it? you gotta crush on him or something?

TO my rae of sunshine: …no

Hitting send you rushed back to the stream, anxious to see what Corpse was saying in response to Rae’s absence, not thinking anything about your brief conversation and thinking you would discuss it after she had logged off for the night. Though, as you heard her phone chime again from across the room followed by another bark of laughter, you knew you weren’t getting off that easy.

“What are you laughing about?” Corpse’s honeyed voice sounded from your earbud, hearing Rae’s giggles from what you presumed to be their discord voice chat. Glancing anxiously between his stream and the reflection of Rae’s face cam in one of her monitors, your heart began to sink as you watched that familiar mischievous grin tugging at the edge of her lips.

“Oh just my friend (Y/n) sent me a funny meme”

“Wait, is she the one in some of your Instagram posts?” You swear your heart stopped beating at that moment, eyes glued to the screen in front of you as you tried helplessly to process the conversation happening right in front of you. He knew who you were? You thought you’d always be lost among the hundreds of thousands of his new adoring fans, left in the anonymity of your Twitter tag in his subtweets, or just another subscriber that fawned over him silently behind a keyboard. Knowing that he’d actually seen your face you could feel your own beginning to heat at that moment; you brought your hands your mouth again, unknowingly curling your body tighter around the pillow in your lap as you tried to hide your face behind it as you become more and more flustered from the words nonchalantly escaping his mouth.

“Yea that’s her, pretty thing isn’t she? She’s my absolute favourite.”

That’s it, you were gonna fucking kill her.

“I mean, yeah... I guess..” The timid words followed by a soft awkward chuckle had your breath hitching in your throat. There was no fucking way this was happening. This had to be a dream, that was the only possible explanation. You were just about to pinch yourself when Rae’s voice startled you from your thoughts.

“She’s actually over right now. She insisted on getting wine drunk later tonight because her professor’s been on her ass lately. I’ll get her to come say hi.” Rae had barely turned around in her chair when she was met with your wide-eyed gaze, panic painted across your features as you shook your head wildly. You were in no state to be talking to your long-time internet crush in such a casual setting. But with the look Rae shot you from her chair as she started to plug another headset into her PC, you knew you had no choice and begrudgingly pulled yourself from the couch almost tripping over your own feet as you shakily walked over to Rae. Shooting her another pleading look, she only shoved the headset in your direction in return as she grinned up at you. Finally biting the bullet, you pulled on the headset and leaned down toward the mic.

“Hi, how’s it going?” Cursing at yourself for how quiet and shaky your words came out, you barely had any time to think it over before a chorus of greetings sounded through the headset. A small giggle escaped your lips as you watched the different Discord icons appear and disappear from the top of the screen. You knew most of these people already which made you even more confused as to how you managed to miss that voice from all the discord chats and voice calls. Well, knowing them was a bit of an overstatement anyway; you knew /of/ them, and they knew /of/ you in the other times you popped up in the background or in passing conversation during Rae’s streams. They did know you well enough, though, to know this was not the way you usually spoke around them.

“No way, that can’t be the (Y/N) I know!” The voice you recognize as Sean echoes through your headset, another chorus of knowing laughter following quickly after. Taking a deep breath you managed to force out a few words that would get them off your case.

“…Shut the fuck up”

“There she is!!” As the group erupted in laughter yet again, all you could focus on was the faint deep chuckle that resounded through your headset. Feeling your face start to heat up, you covered your wide grin with your hand as butterflies burst through your stomach; you could listen to that laugh all day. Before you were able to speak again, though, that heavenly voice piped up and wiped all train of thought from your mind.

“Nice to meet you (Y/N).”

“It’s nice to meet you too Corpse. I gotta be honest ‘n say I’m a pretty big fan of your no-sleep work.” And... there’s the word vomit. Fuck, you could feel your cheeks starting to heat up with the ongoing realization of who you were talking to.

“Aha thank you, I uh really appreciate that. I’m sure you just heard, but I guess you could say I’m a fan of yours also.”

No.

No, there’s no fucking way.

Is he...

Flirting with you?

Before you could even think about what to reply to that with, the rest of the group beat you to it.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, what is happening.”

“CORPSE! You SIMP!”

“Is- Is Corpse really shooting his shot right now?”

You didn’t realize you were frozen in place until you felt Rae’s hand on your elbow, snapping you out of your bewildered trance as you tried to comprehend what was happening yourself. As your thoughts finally caught up to the present, you could feel your cheeks start to burn; pulling your hand up to cover your face you stepped out of the view of the face cam. Rae’s laughter filled the room as she watched your flustered antics, shooting you a sly grin as she started scanning the monitor displaying her live chat.

“Wait, wait, chats telling me (y/n)’s blushing right now?” Sean’s voice echoed through the discord chat, only making you flush further as you tried desperately to find a way out of this.

“Okay, okay, leave her alone.” Corpse’s voice finally piped up amid all of the chaos causing everyone to immediately pipe down. God, you didn’t even want to begin to think of the mess this has already made, you just needed to get out of there before you caused any more damage.

“Yeah, I uh- see- see that the lobby’s full so I’ll just uh- leave you guys to it.” Quietly thanking the stars that Corpse finally got you out of this mess, you went to pull the headset off your ears when that fateful voice piped up again.

“Wait, don’t let these nerds make you leave. You should stay- I mean, only to help Rae y'know? She needs it.”

“I do not!”

“I- I mean yea sure, as long as I’m not intruding,” Cursing yourself again for stuttering before forcing yourself to swallow the knot in your throat, “I mean, she really does need the help.”

“Okay just because you want to flirt some more doesn’t mean you can bully me-“

“Okay, I’m starting the round!” The booming accented voice cut off everyone else in the call as you all stared as the screen began to count down to the game, and before anyone had the chance to say anything else a chorus of laughs resounded, and then the lobby fell into silence.

•••

And it went on like that, the not-so-subtle flirting followed by relentless jabs from the group immediately after. The game was almost forgotten with how much of each lobby was taken up by teasing words and endless laughter, but every audience was just eating it up. You didn’t even want to think about the mess social media was going to be after this stream but right now you were having fun with your friends and that’s all that mattered. The grin was practically plastered on your face as you laughed along with Rae the chat during the gameplay portions and you knew everything from this moment on was gonna be different, but you couldn’t find a single thing within you to care.

Especially when you logged onto Twitter right after the stream and saw that little message right at the top of your requests.

@.corpsehusband: wanna hear some of that no sleep work in person?

•••

beep bop here u go,

[khaotic-kitsunes]

Mischief Under Moonlight

Yes, yes and a thousand times yes! I love this, I wrote this and I hope that means you’ll love it too! Even if this is an old request, I’m sure there are gonna be people that enjoy the scenario!

So remember, come scream at me with your thoughts. I hoard the screenshots of the asks and they bring me great joy!

Navigation 

Cheeky Kitsune 🦊💋

.

    “…What do they feel like?”

 .

 Tamaki jolted at your sudden question, turning in the water to stare at you with wide eyes and his mouth hanging open; it was a simple enough question for your childhood friend. You couldn’t understand the reaction, it made no real sense to you.

 “What? They look strange…I’m curious” You shrugged off his look with a simple explanation, wondering if he would indulge you and allow you to touch the slimy looking appendages, though you doubted it.

 “They’re my legs, they aren’t strange…” He mumbled, sinking lower into the salty water of the sea so that only his eyes were visible, causing you to giggle at the sight of him. A mighty creature of the sea, practically hiding himself from your innocent question.

 “Really? I thought you could use them like arms” You teased, swimming closer slowly until your nose was against his own, eyes staring deep into his, observing the string of emotions that seemed to flash through them in a mere instant. So many, you could barely register one, let alone them all. Your dear friend certainly could be a mystery when he wanted, sometimes even when he didn’t want to be one.

 “You know what I meant” He grumbled out quietly, crossing his arms beneath the water as his tentacles began to move, wrapping around your scarcely covered body until you were squealing at the sensation. A mix of surprise and excitement.

 Tamaki had never let you touch them before, always muttering about humans and their strange curiosities.

 .

 “See? Nothing strange”

 .

 You smiled up at him as he used his tentacles to push you away slowly, creating a comfortable space between the both of you, the sky above beginning to burn with a magnificent sunset, reflected beautifully in the surface of the ocean. A sight you never tired of.

 “Different though…they’re strong. aren’t they?” You questioned softly, peeking down at the tentacle that had wrapped around your chest, moving your hands to rub at the appendage hesitantly, unsure of how you would find the feel of it beneath your fingertips.

 “I suppose so” He admitted, his eyes never leaving you while you satisfied your curiosities with his tentacles, the mere sight of it flustering him more than you would ever know. Not that he would ever admit that to you, no, not you; he couldn’t risk the friendship that had bloomed between you both despite your differences.

 “Awfully gentle for such strong limbs” You remarked, lifting your gaze to Tamaki when they tightened around you, almost as if saying he didn’t want to let you go. You couldn’t help but wonder what was on his mind, what had him so skittish around you.

 “Tamaki, why are you so far away?” You questioned, smiling when you noticed his cheeks darkened from embarrassment, the reaction igniting a strong curiosity within you; it had been a long time since you found yourself so curious about him. Since you had met him, if you guessed correctly.

 Before you could push him further, the tentacles retreated from your body, completely separating you from Tamaki as he moved to leave you for the day; causing a guilt-ridden panic to rise up inside of you. You hadn’t meant to scare him away, nor to make him uncomfortable.

 .

 “Hey, wait! I’m sorry…”

 .

 Tamaki let out a noise similar to a startled puppy as your arms wrapped around his chest from behind, his back feeling almost scolding against your practically bare chest. You hadn’t meant to jump on him like this, but it was certainly one way to keep him from leaving. As a human, you didn’t stand a chance should he want to dive beneath the waves.

 You both knew it. After all, that was how you had met, all those years ago. Tamaki a young merman, somehow discovering a small girl beneath the surface of the raging waves above. Just like then, you didn’t remember how you had gotten in such a position, but it didn’t matter. He had saved you and then you had, in turn, kept his secret and helped him whenever he asked.

 “…Let go…” He whimpered out, not looking back at you while you held onto him, trying desperately not to lose your thoughts to the way his body felt beneath your fingertips; the way his muscles quivered whenever you dragged your fingers over them.

 “I’m sorry” You repeated quietly, relaxing only when you felt one of his many tentacles wrap around your calf, travelling up your leg until the end of it was nestled between your thighs. Squirming harmlessly, in ways you weren’t quite sure what to think of.

 Should you be mad? Or maybe you should enjoy the new feeling? It was so hard to judge what to do, to choose between listening to your heart or your mind.

 .

 “(Name)…”

 .

 Tamaki trailed off, gulping as he chanced a look back at you, eyes dilating when he saw the flustered expression that had settled on your delicate features, tugging at several different emotions within him. As you always seemed to do.

 “…Let go, come back tomorrow night” He paused, licking his lips nervously before turning to face you, chest to chest, nose to nose; your breath mingling with his from the proximity of one another.

 He reached up slowly with one hand, brushing his fingers against your cheek before his lips brushed against your own, distracting you long enough to allow him to slip free. Disappearing into the depths of the ocean faster than ever before; leaving you a confused mess.

 .

~  ~  ~

 .

 You moaned out quietly under the light of the full moon, spread out on your back over the smooth rocks hidden by jagged boulders belonging to the largest cliff in the area, Tamaki hovering above you while one of his smaller tentacles filled you slowly, stretching you for him.

 “I can’t believe you came…” He whispered out, staring down at you with wonder while his hand brushed over your stomach, sending shivers throughout your body, the sight leaving him aching to be inside of you.

 “I didn’t think you would” Tamaki admitted, leaning down to kiss you hesitantly, though he was quickly assured of your approval with the way you kissed him back so eagerly, fingers tangling into damp locks; holding him close while he pleasured you.

 “I figured it out yesterday” You mumbled, pulling your head away from his own to let out a moan of pleasure, your back arching when a second tentacle, bigger than the first, began to push against your folds, filling you slowly. Despite the tight fit, it felt amazing.

 You could only imagine what Tamaki would feel like, when he finally decided to join in on the pleasure.

 “They’re sensitive, aren’t they? That’s why you wanted to leave…” You prompted, gasping out when Tamaki bit at your neck with a surprising amount of force, not that you disliked the sudden sensation. It was strangely appealing.

 “Sort of” He muttered out against your skin, the tentacles inside of you beginning to move at a harsher pace while a third moved to brush against your cheek tenderly, wet and yet, strangely warm, comforting almost.

 “It was the way you were doing it. It was different to using them for simple tasks, you were…” He trailed off into an animalistic groan, watching you as you turned your head, kissing the appendage before licking along it slowly.

 You couldn’t help yourself; your hips were moving to match the pace of the tentacles inside of you and it had been eating away at you for awhile now. Just what he would do if you licked one of his tentacles. You wanted to know if it would make him uncomfortable, or if the sight would get to him in other ways.

 The next thing you knew, the tentacles inside of you were gone, replaced with Tamaki’s throbbing cock while the tentacle in front of you thrust itself past your lips and into your mouth, the very end of it brushing against the back of your throat. It was almost like a blowjob, except Tamaki could enjoy the sight of you much closer, as well as fucking you at the same time.

 It helped melt away his anxieties of being with you and instead of worrying over if you were enjoying it, if he was disappointing you; he found himself giving in to his desires, in ways you seemed to appreciate judging from the way you sucked at the tentacle in your mouth, your hands grasping at his shoulders desperately, trying to steady yourself.

 You moaned around the appendage in your mouth, moving your hips against Tamaki’s harsh thrusts, your eyes watery but never leaving Tamaki. You could see the hunger in his eyes, the lust and the pleasure; he was enjoying every bit of this.

 He was opening up to you in new ways, friendship be damned.

 .

 “…Do you have any idea how beautiful you look beneath me?”

 .

 He leaned down to whisper into your ear, his hips never stopping as you moaned around the tentacle, gagging slightly when you tried to take too much of it into your mouth, making Tamaki remove it for a moment to allow you to catch your breath.

 “Covered in moonlight, taking everything so well” He smiled faintly when you leaned up for the tentacle that had been in your mouth, greedily sucking and licking at it the moment it was in your mouth again. To see you so eager for this, it left him with no regrets; for once, he was completely happy with his decisions.

 “I never thought you would accept me like this” He groaned out, removing the tentacle for the final time, replacing it with his mouth almost immediately, swallowing up the cries of pleasure as he continued to thrust into you, his dick twitching inside of you each time you squeezed down around him; your orgasm as close as his own.

 You tangled your fingers into his hair as your lips moved against his, you didn’t bother to reply to his words, instead allowing your body to do all the talking for you. Though you had to admit, it was hard not to scold him for not trusting you to accept every part of your dear friend. Even if he was more like your lover at this stage, you doubted that you would ever be able to return to being just friends after tonight.

 Soon, you were throwing your head back in ecstasy while Tamaki moaned out your name quietly, just for you to hear as he filled you with his hot seed.

 .

 “So perfect…”

 .

 You slapped at his chest playfully at his words, shuddering as his tentacles began to wrap around your body slowly, Tamaki moving the both of you back into the water so that you would freeze to death. You would be much warmer up against him in the water and the angle would probably end up feeling better for the second round.

 Tamaki was far from done with you. For once, he would be selfish. Greedy even. He wanted to claim you over and over again until you couldn’t bear to leave him.

 He would never give you up again. He would find a way to keep you as his own.

[gaymershigh]

I'm so braindead I have absolutely no idea if Pocky Day is yesterday or today because different timezones and stuff. Also, I used the screenshot pocky game thingy several times so I made some scenarios out of them! Also, eating them while

Triggers: Mild nsfw for Floyd's part

Malleus, Che'nya, Floyd x male reader: pocky game scenarios

Result: He nibbles on his end very slowly and suddenly grabs your face.

"Tsunotarou, do you want to play a game with me?" You grabbed the pocky box out of the fridge and went back to the couch where your pal, Malleus was. "It depends, child of man. What game are you suggesting?"

"Pocky game! What you have to do is both players have to bite off the end of this Pocky stick and the one who manages to not break and hold onto it wins!" even if he would already agree because of how adorable you are, those sparkling eyes of yours makes him incapable of saying no.

"Alright, then. This isn't too bad than Lilia's games." You cheered in victory, "alright! Open your mouth~" he do as you say so as you also bite off your end. Isn't this exciting!?

Eh, I guess but not really. All of his bites are painfully slow but you don't want to complain since it's a little bit hard to talk with the stick in your mouth and also don't want to upset the fae. The only thing you could do is do bigger bites, expecting that you'll win. However, that is not the case as he does the unexpected.

He suddenly grabs your face midway and shoves you to a passionate kiss. You're shocked but go along with it to avoid awkwardness. The pocky was already broken a long time ago and he's just planning to suprise you as he knows where this is going.

When you both separated for air, he just left with a smile with his lips, chuckling at your blushed expression. You won but does that really matter after what had just happened?

Result: He takes the pocky and gives you a kiss, then licks his lips.

Stupid cat pun translations

Mew = you

Fur-end = friend

Purr-haps = perhaps

Fur = for

Unfurtunately = unfortunately

Furry = very

Meow = now

"What's that on mew hand, my fur-end?" Che'nya popped up in front of you only with his head, making you screech. He made a small "oops" and made his whole figure visible as you hold your chest in relief knowing that it's not a threat. He just giggled at your reaction.

"A-ah..Che'nya, it's you. I bought some pocky with me since it's pocky day." You scratched your neck in embarrassment. The only reason you bought this is to play with someone like in the movies but you're too much of a chicken to ask.

"I see, are mew purr-haps looking fur someone to play the game with?" he asked with a teasing tone as you flinched at his right assumption. You shyly nodded and looked down with slight shame. You took one "Well, aren't mew a cute one?" He approached you, making you confused and flustered.

You took one of them out to prepare yourself. "H-huh?..do you want to play or someth-" you were cut off by him when he gives a quick kiss you on the lips, making you freeze on the spot. "Unfurtunately, I'm furry busy right meow but, hope this will make it up!"

The enigma of a man disappeared from your view but you didn't really react. You were too shocked to even realise the missing pocky that was on your hand.

Result: You two played but you broke it near the end, making him smirk.

"Shrimpy~ what's that on your hand?" Floyd hugged your figure from behind and looked at you with rather.. Loving eyes? You're unsure. "Oh, It's Pocky day and I decided to buy a few packs. Do you know the pocky game?" You offered him a stick and he accepted it with no hesitance.

"Hm? What's that?~" despite already having a stick in his mouth, he took some from the box "It's a game where two players bite the end of the Pocky and the one who bites the most wins!" you're unsure why you sound so happy talking about this but you don't care.

"Oooooh~ so intresting! Do you wanna try, shrimpy?" You almost dropped your pocky when you fully processed his offer. "w-WHAT!?" "You heard me!" so he isn't joking, you thought. Oh well, guess you'll oblige. You don't have a choice if it involves the Octavinelle trio.

"Ok~ The winner can do whatever they want to the loser for the day, deal?" You went to panic mode for a few seconds but went back to normal. I mean, it's just a simple game, there's literally no way you can lose, right? No. You were wrong.

You regretted this, so much. This man is biting like he's supposed to do but he has the audacity to pull you closer with one of his hands inside your shirt, rubbing your body in a rather erotic matter. Is this his tactic to making you lose? Probably and unfortunately, it worked.

You couldn't handle it. He was way too close and he literally just grabbed your ass. You broke it off and stepped back. You looked at him, only to see him have a sly smirk plastered on his face.

"Looks like I won! Remember our deal, dear shrimpy?~" he cooed while cornering you to a wall.

I got a brain aneurism while trying to type Che'nya's full name.

-𝕸𝖎𝖗𝖎

[franniebanana]

CQL Rewatch - Episode 7

Their first vow together. So nice! I actually do like the parallels here between Lan Yi and Wei Wuxian, and Baoshan Sanren and Lan Wangji: you have one set being reckless and untamed (I said it) and the other set trying to restore order. It’s kind of funny that the ancestors are switched, though. So here we have Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji vowing to bring all the Yin Iron pieces back to the cold spring pond to neutralize them, and of course Lan Wangji’s first reaction is, “None of your business.” It’s cute how Lan Yi takes Wei Wuxian’s side and has a sense of pride for her close friend’s disciple. I think he’s an honorary Lan in her eyes.

And then Lan Yi gives them a warning to not make the same mistakes she made. Wei Wuxian’s like, “Yep, got it, I promise.” But we all know from the beginning that this obviously doesn’t go well for him, since he dies in the first five minutes of the series. He will go on to make some questionable decisions, most of which are driven by his emotions, which are often not in check. Side note: I love this series, but I don’t like how they took a great grey character like Wei Wuxian and turned him into a character where many of the things that went wrong were caused by other people.

Another side note. That fucking Yin Iron fell on the guqin so many times, and it didn’t dent it at all. Is the guqin made out of iron too? I thought it was wood. If I did that to my violin, I guarantee you the violin would not fare very well.

Forever a favorite moment. It was great enough that they were tied together by Lan Wangji’s headband, but even better that Wei Wuxian fell on him. So great—such a tease to the audience. And this is as close as we get to the scene in the book when Lan Wangji uses the body binding spell to keep Wei Wuxian on top of him all night (ooh, my heart skipped a beat when I read that).

Also, taking the screenshot, I noticed you can see the impression of the little metal piece from Lan Wangji’s headband. Little things like that interest me for some reason. I wonder if it bothered Wang Yibo—did it press too hard on his forehead? I remember him saying he’d get tan lines from the headband.

I love this little smirk he does. A moment when Wei Wuxian’s gift to gab really pays off. Instead of letting Lan Wangji talk and explain the situation, Wei Wuxian keeps speaking, lying about what they were doing. I’d like to think he does it in part to protect Lan Wangji and to stop him from breaking any of his clan rules, but likely it’s another chance for him to prove himself as someone Lan Wangji can trust. And I take Lan Wangji’s little acknowledgement of him there as his silent “thank you.” It says a lot, I think, that Wei Wuxian is willing to lie to Jiang Cheng in order to protect the Lan Clan’s secrets.

I’m sorry, but every time I hear Nie Huaisang say, “You were gone a whole day and night,” my mind immediately goes to the gutter—like the implication is that they were doing something inappropriate during that time. I keep expecting a sex joke, only to remind myself that this was on Chinese television and that would, of course, not happen. Jiang Cheng says a similar thing (and my mind goes the same way that time too), but in that case, canon book Jiang Cheng does later accuse them of having a more-than-friendly relationship, and he does not say it in a nice way.

Also, throughout the scene that precedes this, where Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji are discussing what to do next with Lan Qiren and Lan Xichen, it really feels like wangxian just want to go on a buddy road trip together, and they are so disappointed when they are turned down. Oh, I didn’t screencap it, but Lan Wangji has the saddest sad face at the end.

I think Lan Wangji is a little impressed here but he doesn’t want to admit it. Wei Wuxian has a great gift to come up with ridiculous stories and lies at the drop of a hat. I love that Wei Wuxian doesn’t have to come up with a scary snake story when he could have just told Nie Huaisang what he’d already told Jiang Cheng and Wen Qing, but he does anyway. Mad respect.

This also kind of amuses me because Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji can never really have a moment alone. They keep getting interrupted by other people when I think they just want to talk about what they experienced. Instead we just have all these shared glances. Nothing like a big fat secret to get close to each other, right?

Omfg Jiang Cheng is so jealous! I thought maybe I was imagining it or just projecting my own ideas onto him, but NO—he is jealous! He’s all like, “If you like Lan Wangji so much, why don’t you marry him?” I mean, that basically happened. I’ve gone on about this before, but I love the tension between Jiang Cheng and Lan Wangji, and the fact that it continues even after Wei Wuxian dies makes it even better. Jiang Cheng is so stubborn and continues to hold a grudge against Lan Wangji, and it bothers the fuck out of him that there’s someone out there devoted to Wei Wuxian, by whom Jiang Cheng feels so betrayed.

And, I mean, by this point, it’s already started. As soon as they get to the Cloud Recesses, Wei Wuxian starts paying more attention to Lan Wangji than he does to either Jiang Cheng or Jiang Yanli. And Jiang Cheng likes to say, “You’re worrying my sister, you’re hurting my sister” when he really means, “You’re worrying me.” His stupid pride gets in the way of having a good relationship with Wei Wuxian. And I don’t think Wei Wuxian would ever put Lan Wangji above Jiang Cheng, who he considers his family—at least not at this point. It’s not until the second half that things switch, and really, even then, in the CQL-verse, the two are probably equal in Wei Wuxian’s mind. He backs off from Jiang Cheng due to Jiang Cheng’s attitude toward him.

Okay, Jiang Cheng’s jealousy aside, I love how steadfast and supportive Wei Wuxian is of him. As soon as he catches on that Jiang Cheng is jealous, he immediately starts trash-talking the Cloud Recesses and talking up Lotus Pier. It’s very cute, very sweet. He’s a good brother to him, really.

Now who’s jealous? Just kidding. I love his wistful expression here, as he watches them go off. Anyone who’s read the book knows that Lan Wangji does get jealous at times and certainly frustrated with Wei Wuxian’s coquettish behavior. I would say he is more longing at this moment, maybe even wanting to get closer to Wei Wuxian, without really understanding why himself. There’s such an isolation to his world: even though he’s surrounded by other disciples, he doesn’t have any friends. He’s maybe regretting how quickly he refused to the invitation to Lotus Pier. I think, on the one hand, Lan Wangji has found one person in this world who not only shares a secret with him, but who has similar goals—on the other hand, his code of ethics are all over the place. His heart and mind are conflicted: he wants to get closer, but he doesn’t want to make the wrong decision. To his Gusu Lan Clan mind, Wei Wuxian is all wrong, but his heart says otherwise. And I’m not saying he loves him already—but he is already seeing a kindred spirit in Wei Wuxian, someone who he can rely on, someone he can trust, someone who has his back, even if it means bending a few rules. And in a relationship, you have nothing if you don’t have trust.

I never noticed that they were communicating telepathically here. Or something. I dunno. I guess it’s not that clear.

Also if it feels like I’m ignoring all these parts with the Wen Clan, it’s because I am. I mean, not really, but this is all the Yin Iron stuff that I don’t really care about. And I’m not in the Xue Yang fan club either, so I’m not going to spend time on him until he’s actually in it in Yueyang (possibly) and Yi City. Actually, confession: I’ve never watched the Yi City flashback episodes. I read it, so I know it, but I never watched it hahaha. I will this time around. I made that pact with myself.

AWWW, HE SMILED!!!

Ahem, excuse me. This is too fucking cute, though. The rabbit lantern that Wei Wuxian drew just for him, his cute baby smile, and the Wei Wuxian pointing it out with a grin. Cuteness overload—my heart can’t take it.

But I also had a sad thought that if Wei Wuxian hadn’t come over, Lan Wangji would be sitting here alone. He’d make his lantern all on his own, send it off into the sky, say his own prayer to himself, and never hear Wei Wuxian’s, which likely sends Lan Wangji over the edge with his feelings. Everything he thought about Wei Wuxian was true, and maybe it’s okay to like him, maybe it’s okay to consider him a friend, maybe it’s okay to trust him that way.

Just a shot that I liked. Enjoy.

I feel so bad for Jiang Yanli here. I also feel bad for Jin Zixuan, even though he’s a complete dick. I understand how they both feel here—to be tied to someone you don’t know, from the time you were small children is incredibly unfair in my eyes. That being said, I know this still happens in other parts of the world, and it’s implied that it’s common in our CQL/MDZS world (which would make sense, of course). I like the feeling of siding with Wei Wuxian, wanting to come to Jiang Yanli’s defense and protect her honor, while also still having an understanding of how Jin Zixuan must feel about the whole thing. His choice has been completely taken away. And he’s, what, 17 here? What 17-year-old boy wants to be reminded constantly about how he’s already engaged? It’s not typically a young man’s dream to settle down and get married—not that it can’t be! But the implication here, with all the girls tittering about it, is that they’re all excited about marriage, and he wants nothing to do with it. Of course, Jiang Yanli isn’t either. I think she really just wants to get to know him and spend time with him, before even thinking about marrying him.

Ah, a momentous occasion: the first time Lan Wangji tries to stop Wei Wuxian from getting himself into trouble (not counting the first time they met, when he was literally trying to police him while breaking Cloud Recesses rules). I like this shot, because you have Jiang Cheng and Lan Wangji on either side of Wei Wuxian, and Jiang Yanli in the front, literally putting her body between him and Jin Zixuan (actually this parallels her final scene). It kind of shows the depths of their relationships (or at least what the director wants to show us). You have Lan Wangji, who grabs onto Wei Wuxian to try to stop him from further brawling; Jiang Cheng, who stands beside him, but isn’t really involved otherwise—standoffish, in a way; and then Jiang Yanli, who physically gets in the way. She’s the quintessential big sister. And I’m not saying Jiang Cheng doesn’t care—he does, but I think his first thought always has to do with the honor of the Jiang Clan and, while he’s standing beside Wei Wuxian, it’s almost as if he doesn’t want to show any involvement with this brawl, because that would look bad.

Ah, the old dudes meeting, while Jiang Cheng stands off to the side awkwardly, wondering if he should be there or not. At the outset, this meeting to decide their children’s future seemed kind of bad, but it actually turned out nice, with them agreeing to call off the engagement. Very progressive, I thought.

Two things I learned in this scene: Wei Wuxian doesn’t want to marry a woman and he doesn’t want to leave the Cloud Recesses yet (TL: he doesn’t want to leave Lan Wangji). He seriously looks so disappointed when she says they’re going home soon.

This feels like a mixture of “I’m worried about you” and “I don’t want to be left out.” We already know at this point that Wei Wuxian doesn’t want to leave the Cloud Recesses (more that he doesn’t want to leave Lan Wangji, because he doesn’t like all of the rules, obviously). He also is very interested in what’s happening with the Yin Iron, as he has also vowed to protect it with Lan Wangji. He is very perceptive—he knows something is happening, that Lan Wangji is going to go off on his own, and he wants to go with. It’s kind of hard to say if this is more out of duty or his adventurous spirit, but either way, he wants to help Lan Wangji.

“After his leave, things will be as quiet here as before.”

Look at how sad he is! The only person he considers a friend has just left, and at this point, he doesn’t know if he’ll ever see him again. It’s possible, sure, but then only at clan gatherings, and that’s if Wei Wuxian and Lang Wangji even happen to attend the same one. I believe we know from the book that Lan Wangji doesn’t typically attend gatherings (when he’s older), he often skips them. And Wei Wuxian isn’t necessarily important enough to even be invited, so he would have to be a guest of Jiang Cheng. Obviously we all know that they do go to gatherings and see each other again, but this is what I’d be thinking if I were Lan Wangji, okay? Like, when am I going to see him again? Will I ever see him again?

I leave you with a wholesome picture of Wei Wuxian and a rabbit. Also adorable that he contemplates bringing the bunnies back to Lotus Pier, but doesn’t because Lan Wangji might get lonely. MY HEART!

Other episodes: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 |

[kayte-overmoon]

"Slow Cherry" Chapter 4

(cross-posted on AO3)

Tags: Mild Depressive Episode, Drinking (everyone is of age; no alcohol abuse), drunk texting, accidental face reveal

Snippet: A soft laugh drifted over the line. “Are you still drunk, Dream?”

He hummed. “Maybe a little.”

“You’re a mess, Dream.”

“Yeah, I know. Thanks for putting up with me.”

“Anytime, love.”

Read Chapter 1 Here

Read Chapter 2 Here

Read Chapter 3 Here

No sexual content in this chapter.

Dream spent the next few weeks losing himself in his schoolwork.

Every time he closed his eyes, he thought of George, heard his voice, saw his smile. It was wreaking havoc on his attention span. His feelings toward the older man were confusing to say the least. It was easier to hyperfixate on school than to try and sort out why he felt this way about a man he’d never even met face-to-face.

Knowing they were only a few short weeks away from living not only in the same country, but the same city made it very, very hard to think about anything else.

Luckily, he had a hardcore coding assignment coming up, so he locked himself in his bedroom with the lights off and drowned himself in Python.

Sapnap noticed something was off and made sure to text Dream whenever he got food (conveniently always with a little more than one person could eat alone). On the rare occasions Dream emerged from his cave, Sapnap looked at him with concern written in every corner of his face, but he didn’t ask what was wrong. He just pushed a bottle of water or a granola bar across the counter to him and told him he looked like shit.

Dream was sure he was right. It was winter, so he hadn’t properly been in the sun in months—for a Florida boy, that was too long. He’d skipped a few showers, and the only time he’d eaten was when Sapnap made sure he did. He shuffled into the bathroom to scrutinize himself under the fluorescents. He squinted in the bright light, so used to the darkness of his room. His hair was a mess, several days overdue for a wash and unbrushed for longer than Dream could remember. He also needed to shave, not liking the scratchy growth around his jaw. There were dark circles around his blood-shot eyes and his skin was paler than it had been in years. He scoffed at himself before stripping and jumping in the shower.

The hot water burned his skin, but it was a religious experience. He hadn’t realized how far he’d pushed himself and how deep he’d let himself fall until it was over. His last final was the next morning, so he was almost done. Thank God.

As it usually did when he had a free moment, his mind strayed to George.

They had still been snapping back and forth, which soothed some of the ache. But it felt like he was looking down the barrel of addiction: he knew that taking one more hit, one more drink, would land him far beyond his limit, pushing him past the fabled Point of No Return. He considered ghosting George, but just thinking about that made his stomach turn. Sex workers got enough shit as it was without their clients pushing boundaries, trying to make something real out of their arrangements, or dropping them outright without warning.

Dream was so fucking pathetic.

He emerged from his shower scrubbed raw, physically and emotionally. He didn’t feel great in his head still, but at least he didn’t stink. He brushed his teeth to cover all his hygienic basics, put on a clean pair of pajamas, and went to bed.

And just like that his semester was over. He did well on his final—not as well as he’d hoped, considering how much time he’d spent studying, but well enough to stay on track to graduation.

He emerged from his final to find a snap from George waiting for him on his phone.

The older man was sitting on his bed, throwing a peace sign to the camera with a huge, cheesy grin. There were boxes stacked around the bed, the only thing left in the room being his bed.

Good luck on your final! Getting ready to put my stuff in the shipping container. Only a few more days.

Despite himself, Dream smiled at the message.

Dream and Sapnap celebrated the end of the semester that night in the only way college kids knew how: by buying as much beer as they could afford and inviting over as many people as they could fit into their apartment. Someone connected their phone to the sound system in the living room, blasting hip hop music over the subwoofer. Dream knew they were going to get a noise complaint from their neighbors, but he was too excited—and drunk—to care.

He got a few drinks in him and danced when he was pulled from the couch. Faces blurred before him, but he knew almost everybody there, so he didn’t mind whenever someone pressed up against him. Someone else pressed another beer into his hands. He was sweating, the heat in the apartment still fighting the December cold even with a few dozen people packed into the cramped space. His jacket came off at some point, so he was only in his beer-stained t-shirt and jeans.

He could happily say he had nothing on his mind. He was just happy, done with school for the next month and surrounded by his favorite people in the world.

But not his favorite person in the world.

No, that person wasn’t here.

He stumbled to the bathroom at one point to piss, wobbling a little and struggling to aim. He washed his hands and stared at himself in the mirror. He looked much different than he had the previous night: he was flushed from the alcohol and dancing, for one, but he also felt lighter. Maybe it was the beer talking, but he felt good. He always liked life better when he wasn’t in school. And that message from George made him so, so happy.

Only a few more days.

George.

Just thinking about him made Dream smile.

He pulled out his phone just to look at the photo, which he’d screenshotted. They’d agreed they could save anything they sent each other except for nudes, which they had to get permission to keep. But innocent little messages like that one were free game. Dream was thankful for that, since it let him get a fix whenever he needed it. He found himself pulling out his phone to look at pictures of his camboy whenever he had a free moment to twiddle his thumbs.

He wrote a message to George, not really paying attention to what he said. Mainly he just wanted George to think of him while Dream was thinking of George. He sent the message and pocketed his phone. The music became unmuffled as he opened the bathroom door and someone immediately grabbed him and pulled him back into the fray.

Dream had… many regrets come morning.

Before he even opened his eyes, he knew how much of a doozy this hangover was. His head was pounding with the beat of his heart, his mouth felt packed with sand, and his stomach was turning. He felt like he needed to puke, but he was too numb to get up. Besides, he had a feeling he’d only end up dry heaving.

He scrubbed a hand over his eyes, debating going back to sleep. Something on the bed shifted next to him (much bigger than Patches), alerting him to the fact that he wasn’t alone.

After some coaxing, he squinted his eyes open and blinked against the scarce light peeking around the curtains—it wasn’t much light, but it was enough to make him want to die. He turned to see someone’s back facing him in the bed, a dude. Dream sent up a silent prayer of thanks that both the dude and Dream himself were fully clothed. He levered himself onto an elbow to see who was next to him. It was Skeppy, of all people, and he wasn't alone. Puffy was there too, curled up against Skeppy’s chest at the edge of the bed. Dream had no clue how neither of them had fallen off yet, so tightly wound together on the ledge. But they were there, snoozing happily.

Someone was snoring, but it wasn’t either of them. Dream sat up further and poked his head around to find Bad sprawled on the floor beside the bed. It seemed he’d wanted to get in with Skeppy and Puffy, but there hadn’t been enough room with Dream there as well. Skeppy’s hand was dangling off the side of the bed where Bad was; they must have fallen asleep holding hands. Despite his head and his stomach trying to remove themselves from his body, Dream smiled. They were all so sweet together.

He extracted himself from the bed slowly, not wanting to disturb them, and grabbed his phone charger from the power strip at his desk. He slipped into the bathroom and closed the door behind himself carefully. His phone was dead in his pocket, so he plugged it in at the bathroom counter as he set about cleaning himself up. He contemplated trying to throw up but decided against it. It might only make him even more sick. He washed his face and brushed his teeth. He definitely needed a shower and a change of clothes, but he didn’t have the energy for it yet.

A soft ding told him his phone was back on. He dried off his hands and picked it up. He had a couple of missed notifications. Karl left one saying he was taking Sapnap back to his place because someone had already taken Sapnap’s room. There was one from his next-door neighbor asking him to turn the music down or they would call the cops. Dream assumed that was a bluff, considering he didn’t remember the cops showing up at any point.

The last notification caught his eye.

It was a Snapchat message from George, received around 3 a.m.

Dream, call me when you get this. I don’t think you meant to send that. I need to talk to you.

Dream’s heart sunk.

What had he sent George? Had he drunk texted him? What had he said?

Oh God, he hadn't told him anything... incriminating, right? Had he said anything about wanting to be more than a sugar daddy, a friend with benefits, a casual observer?

There wasn’t anything saved in their chats above George’s most recent messages. The last message before that was Dream’s response to George’s “good luck with finals” message.

Wait. No it wasn’t.

The time stamp was wrong.

Dream had sent George a picture around 2:30 last night, when he was several drinks deep. He remembered going to the bathroom and texting George, but he couldn’t remember what he’d said no matter how hard he’d tried. He thought it had been a typed message in chat, not a picture.

Maybe he’d sent a dick pic? He hoped not. He had been too drunk to get it up at that point. If that’s what it was, it had to be horribly unflattering. And if not a dick pic, what had he taken a picture of?

His blood ran cold.

He was hitting the “call” button before he could overthink it.

George answered a few rings later. “Dream?”

“What did I send?” His voice was rough. He was trying to keep quiet so he didn’t bother his guests, and his mouth was dry even after brushing his teeth. He sounded like shit.

George sounded uncomfortable when he spoke. “Dream, I’m sorry. I don’t think you meant to—“

“What did I send, George?”

He knew the answer in the silence before George spoke. His stomach dropped when he said it anyway. “You—you sent me a picture of your face.”

Dream hung his head. Perfect. Of course. He’d had grand plans to pick George up from the airport and reveal his face then, or he’d at least make it sexy over their video calls or something. He wanted to make it a spectacle. Instead he’d drunk texted him a selfie.

“It wasn’t bad,” George tried to reassure him. “I couldn’t see it too clearly anyway. It was in the mirror, and you were very drunk. You were a little blurry.”

“What was I doing?”

“You were, like, leaning on the counter. You were smiling. You had a, uh…”

Dream frowned harder. “I had a what?”

“You had—have—a hickey on your neck.”

“What?” Dream stood up straight and pulled the collar of his shirt. Sure enough, there was a dark red mark on his neck, barely hidden by his shirt. “Huh. How the hell did that get there?”

George snorted. “Sounds like you had a fun night.” There was something bitter in his tone.

Dream scrambled for a response that wouldn't put him in the metaphorical dog house. “I don’t—I didn’t sleep with anyone. I would know. It just—my friends are super touchy. One of them probably did it while we were dancing.”

“You don’t have to explain yourself to me, Dream,” George said softly. “I’m a big boy. I know I’m not the only person in your life.”

“I do have to explain myself, though.” Dream ran his hand through his hair. “I care what you think about me. I don’t want you to think I sleep around. I don’t. Not really. Not anymore, at least. And I wanted to surprise you when you saw my face. I wanted it to be a thing.”

“Dream, calm down.” There was something calming about the British man’s voice, especially when he used that tone, like he was soothing a spooked animal. Which, for all intents and purposes, Dream was. “It’s okay. I’m not upset. I was just worried about you. I know it’s a thing for you, people seeing your face.”

“Oh.” Dream’s heart was thundering in his chest. It was making his head throb harder, but he didn’t particularly care at that moment. “Thank you. That’s—you’re really considerate. And did you—I mean, did…”

“You’re very handsome, Dream.”

Dream was dumbfounded. That wasn’t what he was going to ask, but he’s glad George said it. He wasn’t really concerned about that particular aspect of this whole ordeal, but it was nice to know. “Oh. Thanks. That’s… you too. I mean, I think you’re—fuck.”

George’s laugh echoed across the line, settling Dream’s frazzled nerves. “I know, honey. You’ve told me before. But let's continue this conversation when you’re not so hungover, yeah?”

Dream hummed in agreement. “You can tell?”

“You were sloshed last night. I could tell just by looking at you. Partied hard, hmm?”

Dream snorted. “Just a little. I don't even want to see the state of my living room right now. And there’s, like, two-thirds of a thruple in my bed right now.”

“Oh?” Amusement and interest tinged the older man’s voice.

“No, not like that,” Dream laughed. “They passed out in there. Their third is on the floor. They’re good friends of mine. No clue when we all fell asleep though.”

“Sounds like you need to get started making coffee for everyone, then. Be a good host.”

“Probably. I thought about ordering pizza. I have no clue how many people stayed over though.”

“Celebrating the end of term, then?”

A yawn worked its way out of Dream. “Yeah,” he said. “We all finished up yesterday so we just bought a bunch of beer and invited folks over.”

“Sounds fun.”

“We’ll invite you next time,” Dream said, his tongue loose from his hangover. Oh well. “I think you’d like my friends. They’re all… absolutely insane. But they’re the coolest, nicest people you’ll ever meet.”

A soft laugh drifted over the line. “Are you still drunk, Dream?”

He hummed. “Maybe a little.”

“You’re a mess, Dream.”

“Yeah, I know. Thanks for putting up with me.”

“Anytime, love.”

Previous Chapter

Next Chapter

[drethanramslay]

Voicemails (part 1)

Pairing: Ethan x mc

Word count: 5.5 K words (damn that's the most I have written

Masterlist

Warning: ANGST

Taglist: @miyakokurono @trappedinfandoms @openheart12 @sekizincimektup @junggoku @ethandaddyramsey @edith-eggs1 @ethanramseysgirl @samihatuli @loveellamae @x-kyne-x @paulfwesley @zeniamiii @binny1985 @an-urban-witch-ig @ramseyegerton @noboundariesplease @mrsdr-ethan-ramsey @newcolonies @theodorepjames4 @unluckygs @choices-love-affair @kaavyaethanramsey  @caseyvalentineramsey @ohramsey @virtualrain202 @squishywizardhq  @junehiratas @lilyvalentine @nooruleman @itsgoingnuts @cordonianbleu @agent-breakdance @jamespotterthefirst @choicesfanaf @temptress-of-death-and-desire @ac27dj @rookiefromedenbrook @gaiusimp @theeccentricbibliophile @oofchoices @hatescapsicum @sanchita012 @edgiestwinter (if you want to be added to the taglist, let me know ☺️)

Author's note: Well I know I said I was going on semi hiatus but, my studies are going great so I decided to post 🤪 also, shout out to @kittykatchoices for helping me in bouncing ideas( she is amazing)

also I went full out and posted screenshots and dividers sike

Songs: Callin by Alec Bailey is my main muse but I made a playlist too

Forgive me if there are any errors

Day 1

Ethan was jolted awake from his slumber as the flight touched down. It continued to speed down the runaway when it eventually reduced to a slow crawl and he saw the glass facade of the airport, glinting in the afternoon sun.

AEROPORTO INTERNACIONAL DE MANAUS EDUARDO GOMES. The banner read and Ethan let the reality sink in that he actually was in the state of Amazonas, South America.

"Welcome to Manaus International Airport. The weather here is partly sunny with 98% chance of precipitation. The temperature is..."

Ethan zoned out. His back was killing him and the need to stretch was becoming unbearable. Even though the WHO team of doctors had settled in comfortably in the plush seats of the private jet, it was a very boring flight.

There is a certain restrictions to the number of boring and wasteful romantic comedies you could watch in a 40 hour flight.

They did have 2 stops for refueling but they weren't allowed to step out of the plane.

God I want to go on a run so bad. He thought mentally as he massaged his spasming neck.

The doctors kicked back and relaxed, ocassionally discussing the cholera epidemic break out in Tefé, a small city on the riverside. It was very productive and they did manage to make a dent in the treatment plan but, when everybody was asleep and it was just him and his thoughts.

And his thoughts mostly revolved around the reason why he volunteered to join these prestigious doctors to battle the epidemic.

It wasn't out of selflessness, or the need to save humanity or for some mindless award.

It was an opportunity.

An opportunity to run from the girl who has invaded his head and heart, and resided there. 

Leah.

You are doing this for her own good. You are doing this for her professional development. You are doing this for her success. Feelings are fleeting, they will fade away. Ethan repeated those sentences like mantra, trying to ingrain it in his mind that he was doing the right thing leaving her behind.

No call, no text. A clean break.

But no matter how much you lie to your brain, you can't lie to your heart.

Ethan you know you are running away from her because she confessed that she loved you, stop lying to yourself. The snarky inside voice spoke up.

But, if he paid attention to it closely, it sounded just like Leah, calling him out in his bullshit.

He shook his head, trying to erase all the thoughts in his head as the aero-bridge connected to the door and they were opened. Standing up, he stretched his sore muscles and took out his duffle bag.

When he reached the exit, the air hostess with a face caked with makeup, gave him a polite smile. "Hope you had a pleasant flight doctor."

Pleasant my ass...

As he walked through the corridors towards the baggage claim area, he switched on his phone.

As he stood there waiting, he saw an influx of messages from Naveen and his dad.

But that was not what caught his eye.

Leah🌞

(3) missed calls (1) voicemail -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was midnight here and around 1 am in Boston.

Ethan walked out of the bathroom, exhausted to the bone. It had been a long day for him. The moment they had landed they had been rushed to Tefé, where they dived straight into work. The hospital was already flooding and there was so much pain and suffering all around.

Ethan has the emotions of a block of granite but, seeing so much misery and sadness, made his energies drop low.

And it did not help that the pocket in which his phone was kept, was weighing him down.

(1) voicemail from Leah🌞.

He wanted to delete it immediately but every time his finger hovered above the delete button, he just could not. So, he let it lay there in his inbox as a heavy reminder.

The moment Ethan's back hit the mattress a huge sigh of relief escaped his lips. He was weary and his body ached.

But, sleep didn't come to him.

He just lay there staring at the ceiling, seeing the different shadows casted by the moonlight. He saw the shadows of the trees swaying and the reflection of the Amazon.

His eyes landed on his phone on the bedside table and he stared at it for a long time, contemplating if listening to the voicemail was worth it or not.

You don't have to respond...

But, then my resolve will weaken...

His logic and conscience went back and forth but there wasn't any clear winner.

If this is what having feelings for someone is like, I don't want it...

But, you would take a 100 leap of faiths for Leah, won't you?

"ARGH!" Ethan threw the comforter off and got up. He started pacing around the room, trying to work off his restlessness. He walked around the room, his eyes trained on the phone as if it was a bomb. He clenched his jaw and tried to not let one insignificant notification affect him, but it was getting harder with every passing minute.

"Ah fuck it." Ethan said as he picked up the phone to listen to the voicemail. Leah's uncertain and raw voice flooded which forced him to lie down because of the emotions which bubbled to the surface.

"Umm.. hey Ethan, Leah here. I..uh heard that you went to the Amazon to fight the cholera epidemic from Naveen today... And I am proud of you but, I know that is not the reason why you ran, is it?

It's because I said 'I love you' three days ago, isn't it?"

Leah's voice cracked as she took a deep breath, before continuing.

"Are those three words that scary?

I had prepared myself that you would ignore my very existence and shut out all the feelings and that would have been painful but bearable, but... You literally ran to another fucking continent?!"

She bitterly chuckled and Ethan's heart squeezed.

"I don't even know what to do at this point. Don't they say that you should confess your feelings the moment you realize them, otherwise you will regret it? But... I can't help but feel regret... Why do I even try? I should have just shut the fuck up and get on with my day but NO! I had to open my mouth and here I am here talking to your answering machine.

I just can't help but feel that I let you slip away from me...

Anyways, it's okay.. I will wait. I promised you I would always wait.

Just...come back to me..okay? Bye."

The phone beeped, signalling the end of the voicemail. Ethan lowered his hand to stare at his phone's screen.

"I love you Ethan. And it's okay if you don't say it back. I know you need time and I will be here waiting for you..."

That's what she had said three days ago. And as much as they lifted him, it pained him. He was confused and just couldn't think straight. He needed some space.

But, he could feel his resolution weakening. The itch to dial that number and talk to her was irresistible.

You made a promise to yourself Ethan. You can't go back on that now.

He let out a deep sigh and ran his hand through his brown locks. His eyes landed on the table on which there was the complementary stationary provided by the b&b. An idea slowly bloomed in his head and he nodded to himself.

Sure I can't call her. But atleast I can write down my reply so that it won't keep on being a burden on my shoulder.

With that being said, Ethan sat down on the desk and poured his heart out on the loose sheets of papers.

DAY 10

For the next ten days, Ethan would keep an eye on the phone for any notification.

And by any notification, it meant a voicemail or a message from that one particular woman who had him in the palm of her hand.

He would get excited whenever his phone would ping but, his hopes would immediately crash when it would just be a message from the telecom company telling him about his telephone bill.

After he got his seventh 'Bem-vindo à Amazônia'(welcome to the Amazons,) he just let out a sigh of disappointment and turned his phone off and got on with his day.

I am such a moron... Look at where the mighty have fallen. The person who hated texting looks forward to a text. Ethan chastised himself as he entered the local hospital for a busy day.

Around noon when he headed to the cafeteria down the street, he turned his phone on to find a notification that made his heart beat faster.

(1) voicemail from Leah🌞

He pressed the button and brought the phone to his ear.

"Hey Ethan, just wanted to update you on the hospital and your patients. Everything is running smoothly and all your patients are alive. Chief Naveen and someone named Dr. Hirata are managing them. Mrs. Rodriguez went home today and she left you some cookies which I may or may not have stolen because well... they might catch fungi and that's sure would be a tragedy. Also, you don't even like anything sweet and would have given it to me anyways."

Ethan could imagine her shrugging as she stuffed her face with a cookie. That mental image was way too cute and Ethan couldn't help but melt a little. He sat down on his designated seat in the cafeteria and Leah continued.

"Also, Mr. Agarwal from room 456 was taken in by Harper for emergency brain surgery. He had an aneurysm and is in recovery. So far, he is showing great scope of a full recovery.

In short, everything is fine and smoothly running in your absence.

To be honest, I don't miss you that much. It just feel like a normal day when you are in one side of the hospital and I am in the opposite side. But... When I cross your office before clocking out, instead of seeing you working on your desk or lounging on the couch in your office, I just see emptiness.

And then that reminds me of the emptiness in my chest... But fuck that, who cares?!

Seriously, I don't miss you at all. But... That doesn't mean it's an invitation to stay in the Amazons indefinitely.

I would very much like it if you come back to me...okay? Bye."

A grin decorated his face and it made him so happy that his cheekbones were hurting. He shook his head as he put his phone down on the wooden table.

I don't miss you at all...

Who are you trying to convince sunshine?

Those words may be biting but he also knew his sunshine pretty well. He knew that she also missed him the way he did but, both of them were stubborn and had their heads all the way up their asses.

Neither of them were going to cave in and confess.

It's a tiring game and Ethan often wondered how long is he going to last.

So with his head full of thoughts, he took out the hotel stationary and began writing his response.

DAY 19

"Put the patients in bed number 4 and 25 in the recovery ward and ask if they are willing to provide blood for plasma therapy. Bed number 20 is going downhill so increase the dosage of the narrow spectrum antibiotics from 100mg to 250 mg every two hours. And..."

Ethan turned around and let his eyes run over the different patients. He was covered from head to toe in scrubs and goggles donned his face. The mask muffled his speech.

"Bed number 40 should move to another ward because it isn't too severe in her case. And can you update me on the patients in the gymnasium?" Ethan asked as he looked up from the clipboard.

"Most of them are infected sir. We have been segregating them from the healthy ones. We made the banquet hall the centre of testing and if anyone tests positive we are either sending that person to the hospital or to the gym. We have even initiated lockdown to prevent the spread of the disease." The doctor spoke with a heavy Portuguese accent.

"Good. Keep me informed about the patients in bed 12, 39, and 26 throughout the night."

"Yes Dr. Ramsey. Boa noite!"

"Good night."

Ethan walked out of the isolation ward and headed into the locker room where he could sterilize himself. Getting out of the numerous layers of scrubs was a task in itself and he felt so suffocated in them.

As he pealed out the layers off his sweaty body and removed the mask he stepped into the shower cubicle and turned the tap on.

He sighed in relief as the cold water washed over him, washing away the day's dirt, grime and sadness. Working in the isolation ward was never easy. It was always filled with fear and despair. Ethan would try his best to make them comfortable but, he never had a knack of people's skills.

If Leah was here she would have them laughing in no time. The thought rushed through his mind.

Leah.

Ethan was missing her terribly. The first few days were easy to handle the absence but now? Good lord, he craved her.

She was his sunshine and she always knew how to lift his spirits up when he had a rough day be it by cracking awful dad jokes, her infamous puns or her just being around him.

He missed those hazel eyes which would fill up with concern the moment she noticed his discomfort. He missed the way she would reach out for his hand and squeeze it twice when they were in broad daylight. He missed the way she would wrap her arms around his waist and lean her head against his chest when it was just them.

He stepped out of the cubicle, water dripping down his toned abs. He slipped on a fresh pair of jeans and a plain tshirt. He was about to pick up his messenger bag when he saw the screen of his phone light up with a notification.

Leah🌞

(1) missed call (1) voicemail

Ethan gave a small smile before pressing the button to hear the message.

"So apparently now I am Jenner's emergency contact, huh?"

Amusement laced her voice and Ethan groaned, hiding his face with hand. He hoped that Leah would never have to know but now the secret is out and all he wanted to do was curl up and hide.

She chuckled before continuing. "Don't be embarassed Ethan. I think that it is cute and I am so glad that you can trust me with your girl. Look at you, growing up and trusting people."

Ethan chuckled and Leah's tinkling laugh joined his.

"Basically, Jenner's dog sitter had to go out on an emergency so she called me to go to your apartment and feed her. Not going to lie but... I am scared."

She sighed before continuing.

"It's just that once I cross the threshold and see the cold empty penthouse shrouded in darkness... It would confirm that you are actually gone and that I can not continue living in the state of denial.

So, if you are getting calls from your neighbours that there is a hobo muttering to herself and pacing in front of your door, that's me."

Nervous laughter resounded on the line followed by another sigh.

"...you know what, fuck it. It's just a door."

Jingling of keys was heard on the line and it was shortly followed by excited barks.

"Oomph!" Leah was cut off by Jenner tackling her. A crash was heard, which might probably be the phone falling down on the ground.

Ethan smiled. He liked seeing his girls interacting.

Leah's coos were heard along with barks and whines from Jenner. Leah's voice sounded faraway as she spoke to Jenner in a baby voice.

"Oh girl... Don't be sad. I know he hurt you by leaving you here all alone. But you are not alone. Well, he hurt me too. So, don't worry we are on the same boat girl."

Those words were like a sucker punch in the gut and Ethan could not help but sit down on the bench as an after effect.

Don't worry... He hurt me too... Those words continue to echo through his head. He knew that Leah didn't say those words intentionally but, it just made him realise just how much of a facade she had put up, to hide her pain.

God, sunshine...

Leah's voice continued. "Well Jenner misses you too. We are okay, aren't we?" An excited bark sounded throught the phone and Leah chuckled.

"Sorry to disturb you. Go back to do your job of saving lives. You are doing a service to humanity Ethan, and I am super proud. You are so brave."

There was a pause before Leah blurted out.

"I- I miss you Ethan. A lot. And it hurts not seeing you here. But don't worry about me, I am a strong cookie and I will stay strong... For you. I just have one request though..

Come back to me soon...okay? Bye."

You have reached the end of the voicemail. If you want to hear agai-

Ethan immediately pressed the button and he heard her voice through the speaker of his phone. As she spoke, Ethan hauled a taxi to take him to his b&b.

You are doing a service to humanity... You are so brave..

Oh sunshine, if only you knew... it wasn't bravery.

I miss you a lot...

I miss you too sunshine...

Ethan sat and stared out of the window of his cab, a turmoil of emotions just running wildly in him as the words of the woman he loved, ran in his mind.

DAY 28

It was 12 am in Tefé and Ethan sat on the edge of his bed, staring at his phone's screen with narrowed gaze.

C'mon Ethan, don't be a pussy. It's just a message.

And that one message will be the breaking point for all of my will power and resolve. Might as well catch a flight home and personally wish her.

You are blowing things out of proportion... His inner voice reasoned.

"Shut the fuck up." Ethan exhaled, clenching his jaw, the muscle ticking as his eyes again landed on the blinking cursor, mocking him.

It was the 29th of April.

His sunshine's birthday.

And Ethan sat, twiddling his thumbs, contemplating what to type and send.

His thoughts went to last year when they were so at ease and could stay up and talk for hours but now, here he was, not able to formulate a single text message for the girl he had feelings for.

What have we come to?

Ethan couldn't help but feel guilty all of a sudden. Doubt clouded his mind and he wondered if running to the Amazon was really a good idea or not.

I needed space to think and figure out this 'love' thing... Right?

Shaking his head, he cleared all those lingering doubts and looked down at his phone again and wrote what came to his mind.

When did the great Ethan Ramsey get so cheesy? His inner voice snickered.

As he continued to read and re-read the message again and again, he started hating what he wrote.

"This is utter garbage. Who in their right mind uses emojis? Fuck this." Ethan muttered as he erased the entire message. He locked his phone and placed it on the bedside table before getting comfortable in the sheets and slipping into a deep slumber.

11:57 am Ethan had finished his rounds and was just taking a five minute break before he headed into the conference room where the team of doctors would discuss their approach.

The condition did improve a bit here on Tefé, but it was a massive outbreak and things were getting harder to control. It was a stress fest 24/7 and Ethan could feel his brown locks greying by the second.

In this five minute break, instead of grabbing something to eat and regroup his thoughts, he stood in the hallway, looking down at his phone. He had typed another message with lesser mixed signals.

Well... This sounds robotic... No wonder Leah called me Dr. Terminator the first time. Ethan snorted as he shook his head, disappointed.

He was about to type more when he heard his name being called by one of his colleagues.

"Dr. Ramsey, we are good to go."

Ethan looked up and curtly nodded. "Yes, I'm coming." He locked his phone and slipped into the pocket of his denim jeans, diving into work again.

7:16 pm Ethan was sat down on the bench outside the hospital and let out a breath of relief. He had been on his feet since the last 5 hours, running between the gymnasium, the hospital and the banquet hall.

The mask and goggles he had worn, had left bruises on his face and he just needed a fresh breath of air. Ethan took big gulps of the humid air which had hints of rain.

The thing about Tefé was that it rained everyday, without doubt. He enjoyed the rain but hated the humidity which was an inconvenient side effect. Though it was relatively cool at night, Ethan's shirt stuck to his chiseled body due to the excessive sweat.

Ethan took his phone out of the pocket and opened the messaging app again. "Short and sweet is better." Ethan mumbled as he started typing again.

He was half way through the message when his phone died due to the low battery. Ethan just looked up at the sky with defeat.

Was this the time to come at me karma?

He was about to head to the locker room to put his phone on charging when he heard panicked voices calling him. "Dr. Ramsey!"

"Yes?" He got up and started jogging to the entrance.

"Five patients in isolation ward CC-23 are deteriorating and they need help ASAP. We are short-handed and-"

"Say no more. We have lives to save."

12:00 am It was a stressful evening to say the least.

The patients kept on flat lining and Ethan and the staff tried bringing them back to life by injecting them with adrenaline. After a giving quite a few scares, they were finally stable and moved to the ICU.

Ethan dropped his duffle bag on to the sofa in his b&b and stretched his arms above his head, cracking his neck to release the tension in his shoulders. He fished his phone out of his pocket and immediately connected it to the charging port.

His screen lit up after sometime and he saw a notification which made his heart sink.

Leah🌞 (1) voicemail

I could not wish her...

Ethan opened his notifications and pressed on the voicemail she left, preparing himself to face the music.

"Uh..hi Ethan. I hope things are going as smooth as they can over there. I have been reading the news and keeping up with the situation there. I ain't worried about that because well... You are Ethan freaking Ramsey, the best diagnostician of your generation!"

Nervous laughter flitted through the phone speaker before it turned into a sigh.

"I know you are busy with the epidemic and all but... You missed my birthday. And- and I don't want to sound like those middle school teenager crying over an unwished birthday but... It hurts when the love of your life doesn't do it.

I have been trying to reason with myself that you could have forgotten but, I know you. I know that you never forget... And I didn't expect an elaborate gesture or anything! Even a small 'happy birthday Leah' message could have made my day... And I know you are caught up in your work but... How long does it take to type three words?"

Leah's voice cracked and Ethan felt regret gripping at his throat.

"Ethan- I am running out of reasons to convince myself. I am running out of those optimistic reinforcing shit. I am running out of the the number of benefits of doubts to give you. I am running out of faith that you feel the same way as me.

The longer I am spending time without any communication from you, the more I am loosing myself into the vicious cycle of doubt and self loathing.

I am angry at you and I hate you so much right now. I want to burn down your sweater in my closet and throw away the sun pendant you gave me. Just forget that you existed and go back to being the old happy me."

Ethan gasped, feeling breathless all of a sudden. The heavy burden of her pain and his self loathing was crushing his chest, making it difficult for him to breathe.

In a soft, broken voice Leah spoke.

"But I won't. I don't have the strength to yank the necklace off me. Even though it burns me and is a reminder of the person who left me, I still wear it. Even though your name hurts me, I still want to hear it...

...I love you Ethan, so damn much that it hurts me. I need you Ethan, I really do and I know it's selfish of me but...

Just come back to me... Please. Bye."

Ethan leaned his elbows on his knees and let out a breath which rattled through his body. He put his head in his hands and let out another breath, trying to breathe through the heart shattering pain.

I am so sorry sunshine...

So fucking sorry...

DAY 36

It had been eight days since the last voicemail and Ethan had been tormented, swimming in gut wrenching guilt.

Most of the times he found himself reaching for the phone to call her, but he would just clench his fist and resume his work. All the words left unsaid, he would just pour it out on to the loose sheets of paper. That was the only thing that prevented him from slipping into insanity.

He was never one to understand the sentimental reason behind having a diary or journal. From a scientific perspective, he knew that it has long lasting effects in mental health and helps get rid of the anxiety.

But now, whenever he felt like he was going to get crushed under the guilt, he often found himself writing.

If he wasn't writing, he would be working. He started staying at the hospital longer and worked for longer hours so that he could tire himself out. That way, when he went to sleep, he would immediately fall asleep.

But still, no matter how much he tried, his thoughts would always go back to her.

Funny how one person could make or break your life.

It was 4:45 am and Ethan was in the lab, checking in on the newest vaccine that they had worked on. The doctors had been utilising the plasma of the recovered patients to formulate vaccines using the antibodies created in defense. And so far, it had been helping them. They were already vaccinating the asymptomatic people and it made a huge impact.

But still, there was a long way to go.

"Dr. Ramsey, why are you still here?" Dr. Batra, a 50 year old woman from India asked, her voice laced with inquisitiveness.

"Just working on the vaccine strains, Dr. Batra."

"You and I both know that those strains are highly effective." She said as she leaned against the door frame.

"Never hurt to be perfect." He shrugged as he leaned back from the microscope.

"But it does hurt when you over work yourself."

Ethan sighed as he took his glasses off. He rubbed his face.

"How long have you been awake Ethan?" Dr. Batra asked, the maternal concern evident in her tone.

Silence.

"Ethan..." She gave him a stern look.

"Yeah, yeah I will go now. After some ti-"

"You do know that avoiding your problems won't make them go away, right?"

Ethan's eyes snapped to her and immediately looked away not able to hold her gaze. She reminded him of Naveen and how he could never hide anything for him.

I wonder how he is doing...

"But I am delaying the inevitable, as most doctors must do."

"Ethan... I have known you for a very short duration but, I know for a fact that you are not a man who gives excuses."

Ethan sighed. "It's complicated."

"As must all the things in this universe."

"It's just... There is this girl, and she confessed her feelings for me. And the intensity of the feelings scared me. So here I am, taking a break. But... There is this small pain in my chest whenever I think about her. She fills me up with euphoria but can also break me down. When I reflect back on all the happy moments, I get light headed, as if I am on drugs. That is why I am here, to analyse and figure out my feelings whilst helping with the epidemic."

"Well... I think you know the answer but, you are just living in a state of denial."

Ethan sighed as he looked down at his hands. "Don't I know that?"

"Well, if you know the answer then what's stopping you?"

"I-" they were interrupted by the shrill ring of Ethan's phone. He saw the name 'Leah🌞' and pressed the silent button immediately.

"You won't take that?" she asked eyeing the phone.

"I don't think I am strong enough to do that."

"Love is for the brave Ethan. Remember that." She got up and patted his shoulder before stepping out. The sun rays filtered through the gigantic windows of the lab, slowly illuminating the clinical set up with its golden rays. Ethan picked up the phone and saw that Leah had left another voicemail.

Picking up the phone, he stood in front of the window, letting the warmth of the sun wash over him. Be brought the phone to his ear and he heard her.

"Hey. Its 6 am here and I was bored so I decided to call you. Or leave a voicemail because you never pick up my call. I was just feeling lonely so here I am! Kinda ironic but meh.”

Ethan could hear her shrug though the phone.

“I have been taking double shifts all week and it's been so productive. The cool cases I have done and solved, the lives I have saved... they have been giving me my quota of serotonin.

Literally nothing interests or makes me happy now. So my job is the only thing which I look forward to. The things I used to enjoy doing, seems like a chore.

Everything seems like a chore.

Sleeping, eating, breathing, everything seems like an exhausting task. I don't even like sleeping anymore. Because whenever I sleep I dream fo you and when I dream of you, it's like I am being stabbed in the heart.

I don't even want to go home, because whenever I am home, I see your sweater and then my mind goes back to the numerous night outs we had, working on our cases.

The hospital is okay but, every corner I turn I think I see you which, I am going to blame on my sleep deprivation. Don't worry, I am not going into self destruct mode. I still force myself to eat three square meals a day and I get around 4 hours of sleep for every 48 hours I am awake.

So it's okay... I am okay.

I maybe a ticking time bomb BUT, I am not a working hazard. I am alert at all times and all my patients are in tip top condition. I think I should give credit to the two energy drinks I downed along with a cup of coffee.

Don't worry, my heartbeat is under the safe limit of 180 BPM.

In short, don't worry. I am golden.

I hope you are taking care of yourself too! I just hope that you come back to me.

Bye. Love you."

"FUCK!" Ethan exclaimed as he threw he phone with a thud on the table. He placed his palms on the cool granite countertop, breathing heavily.

Shit, shit, shit.

He started pacing in the lab, playing with his beard, his mind racing with worry and concern.

This was not supposed to happen.

Ethan stood and gripped the counter again closing his eyes, trying to centre his breathing but it was futile.

I need to do something, anything! His conscience egged him.

He opened his eyes and it landed on his phone.

Well, I guess it's time to make a call.

well, I hope you guys liked it!

do you think Ethan finally caved in and called her?

like, comment, reblog and let me know what do you think :))

[fizzingwizard]

Another Sunday, another episode of Digimon Adventure: (how tf do I do punctuate??). It is a good time to be a fan of Yagami Taichi.

I remember being 11 years old, the last episode of Digimon Adventure made be bawl my eyes out, and although I was excited for 02, really I just wanted more of Adventure. I guess I’m just slow to like new things (well, I am), but I would have super happy if the producers had been like, “02 will be a reboot for Adventure with the same characters and similar storyline.” And then do the same thing for every new Digimon season xD I’m sure I’m pretty damn alone in that opinion and don’t get me wrong, I love 02, and I think Tamers was good. And yet xD

^The screenshot that sums up the episode: Greymon gets his butt kicked while Taichi hangs on for dear life

I know the bond between children and Digimon is what powers them, and I’m kind of wondering if having a physical connection improves that in this show, because these kids are always riding around on their partners. (Not able exception - Togemon, because ouch. But I expect to see Mimi on her boxing glove at least lol) I have to rationalize it that way because otherwise it’s like why would having an elementary school kid on your head while you rush into the line of fire count as a battle strategy

This ep picks up pretty much where we left off, which means it’s probably only been hours since Yamato joined the group at the fortress. Already the atmosphere is completely changed.

I can see them, but they can’t see me... Ishida Yamato’s modus operandi

more below

Here is a very Digimon-esque tableau: everyone gathered around Koushirou and his computer. Yamato still being standoffish. I imagine he jumped at the chance to stand guard at the entrance so he doesn’t have to get too close to anyone.

Agumon’s fight with MetalTyrannomon went... not so great. Yamato coolly tries to explain to Taichi that evacuating was the only way, otherwise they’d risk all being destroyed, and that would be the end of everything.

Taichi’s fist tightens and begins to shake...

... he doesn’t look like he totally agrees with Yamato’s reasoning, but he doesn’t have a better idea. But, being Taichi, he can’t just let it rest.

Yamato talking to Taichi’s back while Taichi frantically starts to sort out his Feelings is just how they communicate. This is a common shonen anime trope for the hero and his foil. Yamato’s pushing, Taichi’s not exactly hiding, but he doesn’t want to face him until he can face him with resolve.

Yamato: Look at me. Look at me!

Taichi: *sweating* It feels like a hole’s burning in the back of my neck, so... I’ll pass

Taichi finally explains out what’s got him so knotted up: he regrets Ogremon’s death. Like we saw last episode, the battle that began as revenge turned into a battle of samurai pride. And Taichi is evidently a samurai. He wanted to see that battle to the finish, out of mutual respect for the opponent (who he’d never met before and who had been trying to kill him previously... but y’know when you’re kindred spirits that’s all water under the bridge)

Yamato doesn’t really get it. This is where these two are fundamentally different. Taichi attac, Yamato protec, then everybody gets a FIGHT!

I mean, not 100% of the time, but the bottom line is Yamato’s not so big on this pride thing, although he does have pride of his own. But he’s definitely not into taking unnecessary risks, especially if it puts his friends in danger. The trouble is, Taichi doesn’t think he takes unneccessary risks either... just necessary ones ;)

The other kids can already feel the tension increasing and Taichi and Yamato haven’t even raised their voices at each other yet. Lol buckle up kiddos

Jou wonders if he should make them stop, and Mimi instantly turns around and begs him to try. My Joumi heart LEAPT.

TBH I was surprised she did anything at all, I was expecting Jou’s “Should I break them up?” to just end there with nothing happening. Instead we got an adorable Joumi moment where Mimi shows that as much as she teases him, she already somewhat relies on Jou (to be fair, I do think Mimi’s the type to rely on anyone who offers when she’s not sure what to do herself). Jou, being Jou, is unprepared aaaaand wigs out.

Jou: Oh no oh no oh no she actually expects me to get between them?!?! But but I flunked Tough Guy school! That’s literally why I’m a nerd! This girl’s trying to throw me to the wolves!

Fortunately for Jou, he has a redheaded savior.

Sora: Stop it. He’ll wet his pants again and I don’t have any more extras.

Sora shows her insight into people’s hearts and understands that Taichi and Yamato need to hash things out. It’s not dangerous... yet. But the way she’s more or less frozen in place along with the others says she’s... maybe a bit on her guard, at least, lol.

Koushirou, being Kousihrou, is completely oblivious to all of this and focused on his computer.

Oh yeah... the real reason Taichi turned his back to Yamato earlier - whenever they look directly at each other, they suck each others souls out. I CALL BODY SWITCH

I mean jogress

I mean marriage

They spend like the entire first half of the episode arguing omg get a room.

Then... Agumon wakes up!

And even though it’s a cartoon, it’s clear to see the way Taichi’s body fills with relief. I wonder if Yamato didn’t realize or didn’t think Taichi was that worried about Agumon. 99 Yamato tended to feel that Taichi was insensitive to others. But while he can be, Taichi also doesn’t express his emotions in the same way as Yamato. They’re both wont to hide how they feel, but while Yamato goes quiet and aloof, Taichi just acts like everything’s normal. So maybe here, Yamato really thought Ogremon and MetalTyrannomon were the only things on Taichi’s mind. Just a guess.

Awwww montage of cute...

a boy and his dinosaur!!

Maybe to Yamato’s surprise, Agumon totally echoes Taichi’s feelings about Ogremon. “I wanted to settle the score with him.” Weird as it sounds, they made a manly bond with Ogremon and running away just doesn’t sit right. Agumon’s raring to go...

... but his stomach isn’t quite ready yet hahaha.

Yamato’s probably used to Gabumon’s appetie but I suspect Agumon’s tummy growl has errr exceptional resonance

Glad to see the return of the Digimon’s bottomless pit aka stomach. I think it was just last week I complained about that not really being a thing so far. This time it was the other Digimon who went gathering, but I hope to see the human kids rushing around in a frenzy to care for their partners’ appetites soon lol

While the others eat, Taichi and Yamato decide they haven’t finished vampiring each other’s souls and sneak out to the mouth of the cave. Sora follows them to see if she can watch any hot yaoi action.

Lol but I do really like the framing heart. All we can see of the boys is their shadows. Sora keeps her distance but she’s watching them intently from a distance. I assumed she was just gathering more data on how short a leash she needs to keep them on.

Turned out that was not quite correct... reluctant to interrupt though she’d been before, once they start talking about what to do next she adds her input. We’ve got Yamato on Taichi’s one side and Sora on his other side. It’s the beginnings of TAIORATOOOOO *more airhorns*

^I can’t see anything but Goku and Vegeta bahahaha. Also why is eleven-year-old Yamato SO broad-shouldered, between that, his deeper voice, and his perfeclty coifed hair Taichi must seem like a toddling infant to him bahahaha. Like come on Yamato is not a child you must be kidding

Already Yamato is getting into the habit of Looking At Taichi while Taichi Looks At Literally Anything Else.

These two don’t need words. They talk with their vampiric eyes.

Koushirou’s hyper focus on his computer finally pays off and they all gather back around. Everyone starts cheering when the hologram appears even though they don’t know what the heck it is. This is Koushirou, so it must be awesome!

It turns out to be a map of much usefulness.

And it turns out Ogremon was telling the truth about the path to the holy Digimon being straight ahead, while fires Taichi up even more.

^Obligatory ‘Gomamon is cutest Digimon’ cap

Koushirou also gives Taichi special data on MetalTyrannomon, including his weak point. Taichi is THRILLED. He’s happier about this than he is about finding the route to the holy Digimon. This is the difference between Taishiro and Taito guys. When Taichi gets a reckless idea, Yamato tries to talk him down, or at least be sensible about it. Koushirou? Koushirou is a FREAKING ENABLER.

They wait with baited breath for Yamato’s reaction. Though he seems underwhelmed, Yamato admits Koushirou’s information “does seem reliable.” That’s all the permission Taichi needs to go back to freaking out over how awesome Koushirou is.

They come up with a plan to lure MetalTyrannomon away so Taichi can fight him while the others take the chance to escape and head towards the path to the holy Digimon.

^Obligatory ‘Sora is best girl’ cap

Yamato waits for the others to get away before following after... he stalls for a minute as if unsure whether it’s really alright to leave Taichi on his own. In the end he joins the group... All things considered, I think he’s pretty thrown off by Taichi, tbh.

Yamato’s group doesn’t make it far before they encounter a very suspicious looking lake.

^More evidence that Yamato is not really an elementar school kids. He’s clearly at least 15. He’s been routinely failing every year in order to get held back until he can be in the same class as Takeru. That’s the extent of his overprotectiveness

It sure is fortunate that Koushirou’s genius extends to fluency in English or they’d have no idea this lake of dark mist is bad friggin news.

Or... maybe they would have:

Mimi sneaks behind Jou and pulls his middle school exam workbook out of his bag.

And immediately chucks it into the lake.

Where it disintegrates.

This is how Mimi’s mind works. She’s smart! They need to know what would happen if they went into the lake without actually going in it. So they need to put something else in first. So far so good. What should she throw? A stick? A rock? One of Sora’s endless towels?

No, Jou’s workbook. Duhhh.

She probably felt she was killing two birds with one stone here x’D Experiment complete, and Jou prevented from anymore whining about not having time to study. Mimi is chaotic good.

gosh I love Joumi

Jou is lawful neurotic

Greymon shielding Taichi is just soooo cute even if it still feels weird that he has to be up there in the first place

The battle rages between MetalTyrannomon and Greymon, who just won’t quit even though he’s losing... pretty bad... I mean...

He just grabbed a missile with his bare hand...

Taichi: Now I know what it’s like to be a firework

Loop-de-loop! Taichi’s suction cup shoes strike again.

Courage going UP!! Reaching a fever pitch! The evolution that’s been looming for two episodes finally happens!

MetalTyrannomon: Eat my dust!

Woooooooo, MetalGreymon is just as freaky as ever. Always my least favorite evolution in Agumon’s line, but the glowy purple wings are cool.

Also, nipple missiles.

MetalTyrannomon: I can’t believe I was beaten by some meddling kids!

So yeah, we are back to killing Digimon willy-nilly. None of this “but what about their hearts?” shitck. Always found it amazing in 02, a children’s cartoon, that said “Yeah the characters you loved last season were totes murderers but it was justified and sometimes you just have to kill.” And fourteen-year-old Taichi is just like, “Yeah, I’m a murderer, and you should be too.” XD And Miyako hits LadyDevimon with a skateboard. Priceless

This scene is adorable but Taichi’s butt looks so saggy.

I’m kind of wondering how evolution works in this show. They jumped right to jogress in like episode two or something, but we haven’t seen it since (I would sort of expected Taichi to think of it when it was clear MetalTyrannomon was too strong, though I would also expect Yamato to nix that idea both because he doesn’t want to and because to him it’s a pointless fight and not the priority). Since then, the Champion level evolutions went similar to 99 Adventure, with everyone getting their special episode, and I’m sure that’s how it’ll go down with the next level too, but there was no gap at all between going from one level to the next. I’m trying to say, they seem able to reach the next level awfully fast. They didn’t need to meet Gennai and collect the tags and Crests, the Crests appear already uploaded in their Digivices. I’m not complaining, as always I’m glad this show is not just a carbon copy of the old one, but I am curious if evolutions are easier to attain in this series, or if there are going to be more of them and that’s why they come so quick, or if the series just won’t run long enough for there to be significant gaps of time between evolutions.

Episode ends with the group deciding, like I predicted last week, to split up and try the Left and Right routes, since the Straight one is blocked. Gays go right and lesbians go left, of course. :P

This episode was pretty fantabulous, I loved it, Digimon is awesome.

Next week it’s no surprise what we’re gonna get.

WeeeeereGarurumon! Also my least favorite evolution of Gabumon’s line but still cooler than MetalGreymon hahahaha.

I’m also totally stoked for the grouping of Yamato, Jou, and Sora. There’s tons of potential for Yamato and Sora to bond, although my prediction is that while he’ll pretty much like her (even if he won’t admit it to himself), she’s going to find him a little difficult. But she’ll have an easier time talking to him than the others do. I also fully expect Jou to drive Yamato out of his mind lol.

This also means the other group is Taichi, Koushirou, and Mimi. I assume we won’t see too much of them next week, but I hope that means they’ll get their episode the week after, because I am dying for some Taishiro moments. Practically salivating. Also, Koumi fans can probably look forward to Mimi and Koushirou Not Getting each other too, lol

[mousehole5000]

tgcf chapters 107 - 120 this is one where i give some Opinions. i do overall like hualian a lot but i have some quibbles

wait why am i still taking screenshots? i can copy/paste again afskldfjasad

It really was hard to tell whether people would feel happy after watching such performances. However, in truth, slaughter and the sight of blood did create excitement in people. Whether or not there was fear, after the initial shock was over, a rush of adrenaline would be produced in the heart- me watching horror movies

“Shi Qingxuan said. “Then, Your Highness, Crimson Rain Sought Flower! I order you to—to immediately strip each other’s clothing!” - djslkadjlsd WHY DID HE SPECIFICALLY SAY THEY HAD TO STRIP EACH OTHER THISALSKDJ is this a normal thing is it a wingman attempt what is happening

“I’ll tell you what it is,” he said softly. “To watch with your own eyes your beloved be trampled and ridiculed, yet be unable to do anything. That’s the worst suffering in the world.” ... “Ming Yi asked, “What’s the biggest regret of your life?”- when truth or dare gets a bit too real

On the side, Hua Cheng was still only observing, and was already bored to the point where he’d changed back into his red robes. Then he changed to black robes again. Then to white robes. Almost every time Xie Lian looked back, he would be donning a different appearance, and with every new look there were different hairstyles, and different accessories, and different boots, and so on; sometimes playful, sometimes elegant, sometimes deadly, sometimes glamourous. Xie Lian was growing dizzy from all the colours and kept looking back, unable to look away. - THIS ISNT THE TIME HUA CHENG. YOURE PRIMPING. THE WINDMASTER HAS BEEN KIDNAPPED AND YOURE PRIMPING

obsessed with xie lian not being able to figure out to use the windmaster’s fan and just. using it to SMACK

also windmaster??? whats going on??? :( i know some things from spoilers like who is not to be trusted but i really have no clue whats happening rn

anyways back to puqi shrine lets check on those kids also can we PLEASE get some funds for this restoration smh. hua cheng and xie lian doing mundane hard labor together to fulfill prayers.... :pleading:

jailbreak in the heavens 2: dig a tunnel

Sure enough, the moment Ming Yi put pressure on his shovel, a hole opened up before them. With the shovel raised, he burrowed crazily ahead while Shi Qingxuan, in the middle, cheered him on crazily. As the only non-crazy person, Xie Lian brought up the rear. That treasured shovel of the Earth Master was indeed magical, and with only a few strokes, a new tunnel of over ten meters was dug. - anybody remember mulch diggums from the artemis fowl series? this is much more dignified than that but i think this is only the second time ive read a character just starting digging a tunnel as a plot point

okay so much is going on i wish i hadnt spoiled who certain characters actually are for myself but i have no one to blame but me for a) not blacklisting spoilers at all and b) just having a little freefall through the tags. oh well. anyway heavenly college admissions scandal except way worse. the corruption extends to the heavens and the windmaster is having a very bad day

i guess we’re having a high seas adventure now?

im gonna keep it real im getting tired of how often we get told how handsome hua cheng is. i know its all xie lian’s pov and while im not terribly familiar with it i know what genre we’re working with and im assuming thats pretty typical. its something i dont much care for in general and idk maybe it sounds better in the original but ngl its starting to make me roll my eyes. love you goth king but god okay we get it.

i guess what i will say about hualian so far is that overall i like them and i like how they interact in general they have a lot of nice moments and they just genuinely seem to like each other which is really nice to see EXCEPT for when it actually comes to things that could be romantic or sexual which is a shame bc i dont think it has to be like this. again disclaimer that im only reading a translation and dont know everything might not have all the knowledge necessary to accurately criticize etc etc and im assuming a lot of this is expected from the genre (disclaimer to this disclaimer that i cant say that for sure its just based on things ive picked up about the bl genre over the years) but idk like xie lian was so distressed after their underwater kiss scene. it was kind of uncomfortable to read and maybe im being unfair i know his cultivation is based around abstinence or whatever but idk i dont care for it. and that scene alone doesnt have to be a bad thing like idk i guess its his first kiss ever (?) and it would make sense if he feels weird about it but i just have my doubts thats going to be addressed or resolved in a satisfying way. also im like. dude everyone is like centuries old. xie lian’s been on earth for 800 years. has he really never met or heard of a gay person during all this time? maybe he hasnt idk what he got up to yet maybe that’s actually a thing. also same thing with the reactions from the immortals to xie lian in a dress and characters like the windmaster like again you’re all centuries old and its not uncommon to be able to just completely change gender presentation. why are you all weird about a man wearing a woman’s dress? i just feel like that shouldnt be a big deal to these characters idk

also again not going to lie part of this that im not really a big fan of reading romance in general. yes i am reading this book. yes i do read and write a lot of fanfic that includes or centers romance. im multifaceted. but really what im talking about is the like physical side of it and descriptions im extremely picky about it. ill give an example. early on in the torture pit (or whatever it was called i cant remember lol) when xie lian kind of accidentally felt up hua cheng in the dark when he was being carried. i dont think thats a bad thing to have happen between the two romantic leads i think thats fine and good to include that early but i just did not enjoy reading it when it happened idk maybe it was the wording and i do think that moments like these work better in a visual medium. ive definitely read het romance that reads like this and i wasnt a fan of that either lol same with fanfic i get tired when writers go on and on about how hot one characters finds another character. this isnt a huge criticism of it like i said im picky but again like with the way that hua cheng is described it just makes me roll my eyes sorry kings

okay back to the reading. this whole saving the fishermen thing feels like a big set up for something narrative-wise. hua cheng specifically insisted on coming and i know one of the characters involved ends up dying im wondering if thats now it would be a good time tbh if things get just a bit too unfortunate during this heavenly calamity... and the brothers are notably not having a harmonious time... also tho it feels very likely we’ll just have another Hualian Moment (tm)

In such a situation, Pei Ming still acted the same. In the evening, when they rescued a few fishermen girls, so scared their eyes were blurry from tears, he held them in his embrace and soothed them with a gentle voice; a true show of honeyed romance, affectionate and charming. - pei ming please get pickled again.

also its funny that hua cheng is just kinda hanging out and everyone else just has to deal with it

Looking down from above, the entire area was painted in a terrifying black. It was easy to see the collision between the two different-coloured currents. Their fierce battle was what formed this enormous whirlpool. As the eye swallowed the ship whole, the two currents of water separated. However, the battle was far from over. Like two venomous vipers, they continued to snap at each other. Each collision was followed by a mountain of angry waves. - this pretty dope ngl. also love our wind and earth masters just chilling on a shovel i dig it. hehe

Yet, other than discovering Hua Cheng had a fine body, there were no other finds. Xie Lian was at his wit’s end and started to worry. - okay see this one’s funny im just also irritated bc im like WE KNOW!!! WE GET IT HE’S HOT AND XIE LIAN THINKS HE’S HOT OKAY GOT IT

okay kiss #2 again its not the kisses themselves its xie lian’s reaction it just bothers me idk im not saying i need him to be super into it and completely unconflicted about it rn but he’s just so freaked out about it and idk i just dont really like it just feels weird i dont care for that aspect of it. also dude hua cheng is a ghost and he did this exact same thing for you before just chill. i wish instead of xie lian literally running away while screaming that hes sorry he was just like “oh haha youre fine thats cool im gonna go look around the woods i dont feel weird about this at all haha” like idk its kind of funny but when its literally our two romantic leads i just feel like its confusing like it kind of makes me feel like they shouldnt be together if one of them freaks out this much again considering the fact that they are both CENTURIES old. i know i know xie lian is an 800 year old virgin but. he hasn’t been like this about anything else so yeah idk like it still could have been awkward and funny i just dont think it needed to be so :/ that being said it was funny that xie lian was then internally like “oh i did it wrong? perhaps i should ask him for more.. instructions....” if that actually happens i might like it bc it would complete this little watery theme

Before he finished, he immediately remembered. Coffin wood. There were trees here everywhere; and a deceased? There was one right before his eyes. Sure enough, Hua Cheng smiled. “Won’t it be fine once I lie inside? - love that hua cheng just sat on the fact that he can turn anything into a coffin. that would have been really useful information earlier but no he just waited until everyone but xie lian was gone afjaklsdjf

also i do think that oblivious xie lian thinking “wow whoever it is that hua cheng fancies is an idiot for not liking him back theyre totally taking him for granted :/” is kind of funny and sweet. actually the whole conversation they have at the campfire is good and im bookmarking it to think about later

“...You on top and me on the bottom,” Xie Lian replied. “Isn’t top and bottom the same?” Hua Cheng asked. - okay im sorry but. mood whenever theres discourse about top/bottom dynamics for a ship im just like jesus christ i dont care. tbh i rarely read fanfiction if its just sexual and ngl if i see a fic specifically tag characters as top or bottom i wont read it lmfao. especially when people have really strong opinions about this stuff when theres nothing canonical to back it up like headcanon all you want but whenever i see people argue about it im just like no offense but go work out your own sexual issues and dynamics instead of arguing with strangers on the internet about who’s a top and who’s a bottom. sorry to be mean but just thats how i feel lol

this was mostly a ramble with a few excerpts but im getting sleepy im going to TRY to take a break from this for like a day but we’ll see how that goes i do very much want to know what happens. anyway if you read this whole thing hiiiiii sorry for subjecting you to my opinions on top/bottom discourse

[pianoandcookiedoughlover]

*grabs a tissue and wipes at tears*

that’s the end of s5 folks

we’re just gonna do this chronologically because i don’t even know where to begin besides the start so . . . yeah

starting off with this shot

(sorry it’s such bad quality)

i almost fell off my bed

enough said

oof, okay, jamie vs mike. 

i may be crucified for this, but i actually think there’s some truth in what jamie said about mike wanting him to go to hawkstone because he couldn’t. 

mike has always been very invested in jamie’s football/soccer career, always helping him train, buying him equipment, offering to coach. and yes, of course, having a supportive parent/guardian is amazing and not everyone is lucky enough to have that. but as the seasons have gone on, some of the things mike says/does makes me think his intentions aren’t simply: “i want to be supportive for jamie.” 

i first think of that time that jamie was planning to go to foxborough (that’s such a weird sentence, oh my god). the coaches there didn’t want their players to have any outside coaching, and mike got pissed at that. now why would someone who’s been such an advocate for jamie getting proper coaching and becoming a professional get annoyed at a club who is offering to get him to that point (now, that isn’t to say foxborough are angels. i have issues there as well)?

and what sort of solidified this for me was his reaction here:

saying that he’s supported him through everything may be true, but it’s all been in the realm of football. jamie has never been interested in anything else (whether he’s been exposed to anything else and encouraged to do anything else is unknown) and so mike really has only been able to support him in football. he doesn’t do anything else.

and now that he’s found something that he wants to do (or thinks he does, but i’ll get onto that) that doesn’t align with football, mike’s hands off. not, in fact, because he thinks jamie is throwing his career away, but because he thinks he’s throwing HIS career away. he’s lived vicariously through jamie and his successes and now that jamie is going after something that isn’t “real football,” he can’t support it. because he doesn’t really support jamie. he just wants him to do the things he didn’t get to do.

even more so, his reaction to this i thought added to this:

hearing that howard royale was going to let him go anyway, he’s shocked. and i think he’s always thought in his head that jamie’s been a literal prodigy, someone unbeatable. yes, jamie is a wonderful player. but he’s not unstoppable. and so when karen logically points out how hawkstone are not going to put all their eggs in jamie’s basket, he starts to realize that jamie’s just a kid. an amazingly talented kid, but not a medium he can reverse his regrets through. and i think that this is what inspires him to go and support him at his competition: he’s his grandson first, and a football player second.

i just have to ignore ian at this point because . . . he sucks

dillon thinking the vibes are off at foxborough, providing an opportunity for him to stay at northport . . . 

(i am so sorry this is such an ugly screenshot)

i also couldn’t help but think of andi mack when dillon talked about coming out to phoenix:

soft girlfriends stretching together

i thought the moment between alba and zoe was really sweet actually - maybe in s6 they’ll get alba another girl to play with?

duncan turning over a new leaf and being not an asshole? we like to see it. also i really liked this shot for some reason

i’m really excited to see dillon at northport and see what he gets up to there. hopefully duncan hasn’t fooled us all and he’s really being genuine. 

okay, guess we have to talk about the world fifa cup (i’m sorry, but i can’t believe that freaking jethro and jamie are the best in the world. but i digress)

the interactions between jethro and jamie were kind of weak in my opinion - like, you’re also a failed footballer, jethro, don’t know what point you’re trying to make with that. it just felt very . . . weird. rehashing something that really didn’t need to be brought back.

the whole auditorium and everything felt more for cinematic effect, trying to have some big venue for the finale. unfortunately, from what i know in this tumblr community, this was the storyline we were least interested in, and yet they put (probably) the most money into it. kind of unfortunate.

i think i saw someone mention this but i thought i’d bring it up again: the game switching between fake players and then the actors actually playing.

so, you know, kind of odd.

there were a lot of moments in this entire event where they were building up certain things, but i think it doesn’t have a remotely comparable intensity as to when the gang were all playing together in, say, the gothia cup. i think the issue is that we have no attachment to the video game, the players (even though sometimes they’re the characters), or jamie at this point, honestly. so while i get what they were going for (i think), i think both the way they went about it and the characters they did it with led to it being kind of a flop, at least for me. 

let’s just say, i wasn’t jumping out of my seat waiting to see if a character that has been an asshole to a lot of his friends and ignored his family for multiple episodes can score a goal on a random video game.

i need to make a post about jamie (i’ll do that next) because this is way too long already to fit that in. essentially, though, i think that jamie never really liked playing this video game.

controversial, i know.

i’m sorry, but

why the fuck is karen letting ian take jamie literally anywhere

when i saw this i genuinely thought jamie was gonna jump out of the goddamn plane and break his entire body but obviously that didn’t happen

we don’t talk about the flashbacks to all of his wins because that just makes me sad and want to cry and they grew up so much and-

rewind a bit for dillon’s storyline

dillon’s dad goes from this:

to this:

which was a bit of a 180 but i also get that we needed resolution with their storyline. i guess my only criticism is that some of the things that his dad says are so intense and extreme, that a redemption arc afterwards is difficult. 

i was really proud of dillon for this:

i am genuinely so excited to see what happens in s6, his storyline is something that not only i am passionate about, but i think has been done with the most care and emotion. i think this whole thing has so much more room for development so fingers crossed we get to see that in s6 

i was so happy to see this as well:

he gave him TWO kisses!!!! it was just very wholesome, and while i haven’t forgiven him completely (this literally has nothing to do with me, lmao, but i assume dillon hasn’t either) i think (i hope) he’s really trying to change and be a supportive figure in dillon’s life for once.

and liam teasing him was cute

we are NOT crying

ahh this is such bad quality but that little tap on the stomach (see right)

and then this.

and then the turn of the camera from him to everyone else  . . i just can’t deal. that was really beautiful actually.

we have a whole load of feelings but maybe i’ll save that for another post.

but also:

*approves in lesbian*

and then the music and the shotsssssssssss

and then

s6 finale?

i’m just a mess and i was begging to my phone, “no, don’t leave me” so at least we know where i stand

i swear to fucking god if we don’t see zoe and kat in season 6 i’m throwing hands

they’re gonna have to do some work on jamie’s character because right now, it’s not looking good

elliot please come back

follow up on boggy’s anxiety/panic attacks

we should make a list of things we want in s6 and send it to bbc

i really liked this finale and i’m just so excited for more. just a big thank you to the cast and crew on this season because it has been my favorite of this show and i think they’ve done an incredible job overall. they’ve put in a lot of effort and i think we all appreciate it a lot.

i also don’t think i did this on my 5x11 review/analysis/shit writing, but i’d really like to thank @jonnie-kimmins for his acting in especially that episode. it was amazingly done and it didn’t feel over sensationalized or anything, at least from my experience with panic attacks. it felt very raw and real and i really commend everyone who was a part of that. 

i would tag the other actors but i think jonnie is the only one that’s cool enough to have made a tumblr account and then come and vibe with us hahaha

this was so long and i really didn’t analyze anything i just panicked (how on brand for me) so i hope you could bear to read it and yeah . . . let’s hope they can start/continue filming s6 soon!

[lostparker]

read at 8.57pm p.p oneshot

Pairing: peter parker x best friend!reader

Summary: when you send Peter a message containing something you’d wanted to tell him for months you’re scared it’s made your friendship fall apart.

Warnings: some curse words and a lot of fluff.

Words: 1.8k

A/N: IT’S HERE!!! thank you to everyone who got excited when I posted this teaser a few days ago. i hope you like it cause I still don’t know… is this cute? I can’t tell if this is cute but I was feeling fluffy after getting stuck writing angst for so long… I hope you guys enjoy it. feedback as always is appreciated.

Peter Parker is typing…

…

…

…

You threw your phone on your bed and it was just your luck that it landed face up displaying those three little dots that haunted you as he typed. You couldn’t believe you’d just done what you did. Shit. Did you really just do that? I mean, yes, yes you did just do that. But should you have? Absolutely not.

You paced the room, running your hands through your already disheveled hair. You stopped, at your bed and stared down at your phone. The bubbles indicating Peter was typing had disappeared and to make matters worse there was no new message from him. Just your message  which now displayed a heartbreaking timestamp

read at 8.57pm

shit.

You closed your eyes holding back the tears that were already forming and threatening to spill. You breathed out an unsteady breath you’d been holding in, feeling numb on your feet. Your heartfelt heavy and your veins felt like they were filled with nothing but regret. You’d really screwed it up and you had no one to blame but yourself. You shouldn’t have said anything, things had been fine the way they were.

You looked down at your stupid mistake message. The one you’d debated sending for months and now wished you’d decided not to. Peter was your best friend. Had been since the two of you were paired up in chem class and now you’d gone and ruined the best thing in your life all for some impulsively sent message. The words had been running around your head for months and you wish you’d kept them there. In your head. God, you were such a fool.

You knew Peter knew you loved him, but you also knew that he knew about it in a platonic context. The one issue was you wanted more than platonic. You wanted those jolts of electricity you got when the two of you touched to mean more than friendship. You wanted him to know that when he smiled in the way that made his eyes crinkle that your heart stopped. You just never thought you’d be dumb enough to actually make the move that might tell him those things.

Oh how wrong you were.

Your eyes remained fixed on your now read message. Those seven words that you’d typed so quickly now felt like too many. They now loomed over your head. You could hear them in your head, running on an endless loop. A bitter reminder of what you hoped could turn into something sweet.

Y : I think I’m in love with you…

You flopped down on your bed, face buried into the pillows underneath you.  You wanted to do nothing more than to scream, to cry, or better yet to disappear completely. You’d just told him you had feelings for him and you’d come to the conclusion that his lack of response clearly meant that he didn’t feel the same (otherwise he wouldn’t have left you on read… right?). Therefore, causing you to think that you’d messed up your friendship for good.

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid

Your mind flashed with images of him ignoring you when you saw him on Monday. Or worse trying to find a way to let you down in the middle of the crowded hallway. You saw images of you alone at lunch, ostracised to a table by yourself. Images of everyone laughing at you behind your back about how stupid you were to think that Peter Parker might like you back. Tears spilled onto the pillow you were lying on, forming salty puddles beneath your cheeks.

An out of breath Peter arrived at your window thirty-seven minutes after your initial message. But, you didn’t hear the squeak of the window being pushed open or the soft thud of Peter landing on your carpeted floor because you’d been too wrapped up in your own world of pre-decided heartbreak. You’d been facing the wall didn’t see the way he looked at you, curled up on the bed sobbing. He noticed your phone, and he cocked his head to the side. When he squinted he saw that it was still unlocked and your unanswered confession of love still open.

He hadn’t meant to get you into this state by not answering your message it’s just there were some conversations that needed to happen in person, not over the phone.  And this one? This was one of those conversations. Yeah, this was one of the ones where he needed to see your face. This was one of those conversations that he’d dreamed about since he’d first sat next to you in class. One of those conversations he was sure would never ever happen in a million years.

Oh, how wrong he’d been.

He stepped forward gingerly, his head still tilted at an angle. He gently placed a hand on your shoulder in the hopes of not scaring you since he figured you hadn’t heard him come in. Nevertheless, you still jumped. You wiped your tears away frantically trying to hide the obvious. However the second your eyes landed on Peter they surfaced again.

You were already embarrassed about the message you’d sent, now he was seeing you crying about it. It was safe to say you’d surpassed embarrassed and gone straight to humiliated. He was the last person you expected to see tonight, even if you’d messaged him. You’d just got it into your head that you’d fucked everything up. If only you knew how wrong you were.

“P… Pet…Peter…?” You stuttered, trying your best to make it look like you hadn’t just been sobbing into your pillow over him, despite the fact he’d definitely seen that you had. There was no hiding the obvious. You had no idea how long he’d been standing there but you knew he wasn’t an idiot and wouldn’t be fooled easily if you tried to come up with an excuse for your tears.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.” He whispered, his eyes filled with something you couldn’t quite discern. He couldn’t bear how vulnerable you looked. How scared you looked that he was going to reject you. He would never do that. Not when the same thoughts had been floating around in his mind for months. He knew you were probably second-guessing everything that had said in your message and he wished you weren’t.

He stepped towards you, hoping you wouldn’t step back and he reached out to take your hands in his. He let out a shaky sigh, feeling nervous in your company for the first time (okay not the first, but the first time he was willing to admit) since the very first day you’d met. You were both young. Inexperienced in giving your hearts to someone, being so open with another person. Scared of falling. He was scared to admit that he’d already done both of those things with you. Now he knew for sure you’d done exactly the same thing.

Peter took a second to look at you, really look at you. You were cast in this golden glow from fairy lights you had flickering above your bed and he knew it was his new favourite picture. If he could screenshot real life this would be one of those moments he’d want to cherish forever. Since he couldn’t do that he took a mental picture and framed it in his mind.

His eyes followed the contours of your face. A face he’d grown so accustomed to. Grown to love with his whole heart. He traced the curve of your lips, the same ones he sometimes fell asleep dreaming about. His eyes darted across yours, the same ones that gave him butterflies when they looked at him. The ones that sparkled like nobody else’s when you spoke to him.

There was only one thing he wanted to do. One thing he knew would make all you uncertainty disappear. One thing that would confirm things for the both of you. One thing that would banish doubt and only leave room for certainty. One thing that would tether your hearts together with an invisible piece of string. His mind was practically screaming at him to do it.

Kiss her.

Kiss her you idiot.

Just do it already, she likes you too.

Kiss her. Kiss her. Kiss her.

He removed one of his hands from yours, placing it delicately on your cheek. His thumb trailed mindlessly over it, brushing away the remaining straggling stray tears left behind. Before you could ask him what he was doing he pulled you forward slightly and pressed his lips softly onto yours. The soft gasp that came from your mouth was muffled into his.

Peter felt the two of you fit together so perfectly and when you didn’t pull away he removed his other hand from yours and put it around your waist, pulling your body flush against his. Your arms went around his neck, locking into place in his chocolate curls. The world around the two of you felt like it melted away and all you could focus on was the rhythm of your hearts, stammering in sync.

Peter’s hopeless romantic brain told him that if it had been a movie this would have been the moment the love song played and the camera panned around the two of you in slow motion. This would have been the moment the audience had been waiting for. Instead, it had been the two of you waiting. God, why had you waited so long?

All of your fear melted away into the kiss. Despite your earlier dismay you almost wished you’d told him sooner. Especially since this is what you’d been missing out on by keeping your secret to yourself. Every sense of insecurity that you’d done the wrong thing disappeared out the window Peter had left open. You’d said all you needed to say in that text message and he was replying by saying nothing at all. He was replying with his lips that tasted like peppermint.

Or so you thought.

Peter removed his hand from your waist and pulled out his phone. You cocked your head to the side, confusion spreading across your face. He glanced up at your now unsure eyes once before his fingers danced along his keyboard. You heard the ‘ping’ of your phone from where it lay, still discarded face up on your bed.

You stepped away from him, reaching to pick it up. He was standing less than a foot away from you, could he not tell you what was on his mind in person? Those thoughts dispersed and you felt your heart flutter when you read his message, a bashful smile forming on your lips as he stepped back closer to you pulling you into his lips again. Your phone dropping back onto the bed. Once again face up, just this time it was finally displaying a response.

P: I think I’m in love with you too.

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[aqvarius]

HLITF: This is not the story of your first night: Soma - otona love - chapter 6 summary/translation

i can’t believe we are at chapter 6 (i.e. the last chapter) of this story already... i don’t want it to be over! man, i thought that the last chapter was super hot but this one blows it out of the water. you can find the previous chapter here, or check my new translations page to read from the beginning. 

to recap, in the previous chapter you and soma had started having hot but gentle sex, and you realise that it’s nice but there’s something missing. he’s holding back and you want him to let go and drown in those powerful waves that only he can create, and you want to see his satisfied gaze on you as you drown. so even though you’re feeling really good, you decide to take the plunge and tell him “you’re not the usual mean soma...”

soma: “...you’re good at turning me on”

note that he stopped using keigo/polite language here?! i’m sure you all know this bc i won’t stop going on about it but i LOVE when his tone changes. 

soma’s eyes, looking down at you, shine brightly. 

soma: “...is it okay? to do it as usual”

“...yes”

with a mean smile that slightly lifted only one cheek [i.e. a smirk lol], he jerks his head in a nod. you second guess yourself, wondering if it’s really gonna be okay...[that he’s going to be his usual self]? and then he says

soma: “it’s too late to regret it”

“he’s read my mind again...” you think. 

soma: “because you’re the one who wished for this”

ALSKDJF;LASJFDLFKDJL!!!!!! the return of mean soma has my heart RACING!!!! this is what i’ve been waiting so long to see omg.

anyway, our mc clearly thinks the same thing. your heartbeat suddenly rises due to the mean words and smile that are emitted one after the other. 

soma: “such a happy face”

“he grins, and starts moving slowly inside me again.”

you gasp softly, and this incredibly outrageous man says:

soma: “what’s wrong? you don’t have to hold back/be patient”

“[about having] patience...” you say, and he says:

soma: “there’s no reason not to, since it’s what you wished for”

saying it again just in case, he gradually thrusts into your depths. 

this man is having so much fun with this haha i missed this so much!! also i just have to say i’m swooning that he still calls you kijo in bed. 

soma: “to this extent?”*

*he’s basically asking you to tell him how deep inside you want him lmao.

“nn,” you whine and he says:

soma: “you usually/always tighten more strongly”

you’re assailed by a vibration on top of a noticeably stronger pleasant sensation, and [his?] body is suddenly filled with energy. “that’s right... that feeling... can you handle it?” he asks. you moan, and he says

soma: “don’t hold your voice [moans] back”

his lips, which were by your ears, move to the tip of your chest. you think he’s going to eat you softly, but he nibbles you lightly with his incisors and then licks it with the tip of his tongue. 

soma: “it became pert in no time, how cute”

“ahh, ahh ... so... ma... san...”

i normally cut out all the moans in my recaps cause there are a lot of “nn”s and “aah”s but she said his name like this so i had to put in a screenshot. 

soma: “cry out more with that sweet voice”

you: “aaahh...”

soma: “more”

you: “nn!”

i’m getting some phantom of the opera/christine vibes here. 

while he penetrates you to the core of your body, he plays with your tip of your chest and then he reaches your most sensitive secret part.

soma: “do you want to be touched here while being rocked**?”

**he’s basically asking you if you want him to touch you ~there~ while he’s fucking you

soma: “you have to tell me if you want me to touch you”

you think that even if you don’t say it, he [already] knows [that you want it]. feeling the presence of his fingertips that are almost but not quite touching your ~ripe~ nipples***, you want, you crave, that stimulation so badly that you can’t bear it.  

***塾れた小粒 : i think that’s what this is supposed to mean lol, i had to go on an AV site to verify, hope you appreciate my efforts

soma: “what will it be...?”

“[your] touch, i want it...”

he calls your name with that smile of his and you say:

“...touch me... please...”

the moment you open your mouth slightly,

“aaah, ah, aaahhhh...!” (this is the stuff i usually cut out but i just have to show you how much she’s enjoying this)

the long-awaited stimulation runs through you like an electric current, and your trembling body becomes [tightly strung] like a bow. with his fingertips, he gently strokes your nipples that are becoming too sensitive. you’re devoured by the heat of soma, who has boundless stamina, inside you. 

soma: “is it that good?”

“it’s good, it’s so good ... it’s amazing, it feels so good...”

“but i can’t... i feel like i’m going crazy...!”

soma: “you’re really an honest person, both your heart and your body”

he tells you you’re drooling so indecently (lmao!!!). soma shows you his moist fingers that continue to stimulate you carefully. you feel strangely relieved at seeing his satisfied smile. 

“even though i think he’s so mean... even though i’m so embarrased... i’m kind of happy”

you feel more certain/secure, in both your heart and your body. 

soma: “i can’t bear it/i can’t help it”

you’re surprised by his suddenly gently narrowed eyes. 

soma: “from now on, my words, the feelings in my body...” (not really sure what he’s saying here)

you moan some more.

soma: “that face... show me more...”

soma: “that ... cute face ... [that you have] when you feel me with your whole body...”

(his words are kind of broken up/choppier here because of you know why ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) )

“soma-san is also feeling...”

[the fact that he’s also feeling really good] is transmitted to you by the fact that his voice is laboured with his breathing. 

you moan his name, he moans yours.

i just had to include this bc you know my policy about blushing soma. also sorry my name here is still "you” lol, he says your name if you input it.

“ahh, aaahh, so...ma... san....!”

“the two of us finish at the same time, calling each other’s names.”

there’s a quick fade, and then soma says:

soma: “did your wish come true?”

when both of your panting finally slows down, soma lends you his arm as a pillow and smiles. 

“i’m super satisfied... is what i’d like to say, but it’s embarrassing after all”

you start to say something, but then soma says:

soma: “i can tell even if you don’t say anything just by looking at those cheeks”

red as they may be, soma gently pokes your cheeks with his fingers ... they’re definitely a little warm, but it’s more that he can see through anything (as in, that he can read you so well). 

soma: “i’m also extremely satisfied... both my body and my heart”

“then i’m glad,” you say. 

soma: “above all, satisfying you is what makes me happiest”

“it seems like... it’s thanks to/because of your words”

soma: “the kotobazeme**** ban is lifted, isn’t it”

****kotobazeme = verbal attack/abuse/humiliation. i guess you could call it dirty talk in the context of bedroom activities but it’s more actively malicious like you actively want to embarrass your partner. hope you know what this means by now since that’s what this entire story has been about lol and if not, please give it a google

“if you say it so happily...”

“but you weren’t so mean at the beginning [when we first started sleeping together], right?”

“...is that so?” soma says. 

soma: “then maybe you did this to me”

“is it my fault!?” you ask. 

soma watches you with enjoyment as you were unexpectedly falsely accused*****.

***** 濡れ衣を着せる is like an idiom which literally means wearing wet clothes but idiomatically means being framed or falsely accused. 

a few days later... after finishing the investigation and returning to headquarters, you see soma and kurosawa talking quietly. kurosawa is saying he saw the whole story with his own eyes. you wonder what they’re talking about.  

kurosawa: “just bind their hands and put on a blindfold and they’ll become obedient”

you wonder if they’re talking about criminal restraint techniques? 

kurosawa says that then all you need to do is hurl words at them. 

“words, huh?” comments soma (sounds like his interest is piqued because words are his weapon of choice lmao i’m screaming)

kurosawa says that’s right, as obscene as possible, to stir them up, using a voice that makes them sweat slowly...

“i see,” says soma. 

kurosawa says they can use just words without even lifting a finger, isn’t that sugoi!? soma replies that if it comes to matters that happen between bar counters, it’s certainly amazing. 

“they’re talking about kotobazeme at SM bars!?”

 then kurosawa notices you and exclaims “you’re back!” soma, turning around, says okaerinasai and approaches you with a smiling face. 

soma: “i was listening to a useful story... for future reference”

(!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

the last part is whispered in your ear and your heart leaps. “even if you don’t learn it, it’s still enough!!!” you think (basically meaning that the current level of your sexual activities is plenty good enough without adding in extra techniques learnt at SM bars). the pressure in his smiling face is too much. 

soma: “shall we tie you up next time? or have you blindfolded -”

SLKFJSLKJSDLKD SORRY I KEEP DOING THIS BUT i just want to say that an anon once asked me back in august 2019 which instructor i thought would be into shibari and i said soma and i’m glad to be proven right yet again lmao. 

“IT’S OKAY!!”

soma chuckles and says “i understand”. 

even though you refused with all your might, you still got excited after all. 

“with his enigmatic and mean words, and that ridiculously sexy smile-”

--

and it just ends like that?! WHAT?!!! how can they end it like this! could there be more chapters to come? even goto and kaga only have 6 chapters for this story so maybe that really is the end of it? 

anyway, i can’t believe how incredibly hot this chapter was, to finally see soma unleashed in bed in canon (and not just my own fanfic lol, seeing as i’m the only person who ever writes soma fanfic). i just adore how mean he is and how much he loves teasing you and i feel very satisfied feeling like i got his character in bed spot on when i wrote that delayed gratification fic haha. dirty talk/kotobazeme soma is my absolute favourite. but i also find it incredibly sweet that he tried to turn it down and be super sweet and gentle just for his mc, and the fact that both of them feel the happiest when the other is fully satisfied. i’d love to read a his pov version of this story as well... 

thanks for joining me on this ride! i hope you enjoyed this (final?) chapter and the whole story as much as i did.

i’ve also set up a ko-fi page here and would be incredibly grateful if you would like to support me for translations and being able to purchase more routes to recap in english!