#recruitment officer

[dailymtgflavortext]

"Every name on this list is already a hero! Will you add your own to it?"

-Recruitment Officer

My oldest deck is my 60-card casual Soldier deck which I've had in some form or another since I started playing. I don't play 60-card much any more, but every now and then they release a perfect card for it so I try to keep it updated. This was one such card.

[laurentidal]

Monitored Activity

The email had come from IT right at the beginning of the workday with the subject line "Attn HR. Problematic Monitored Activity."

Dear Miss Villanova, In accordance with company policy, we are writing to inform you that employee Joseph Ulish was found to be acting in violation of the company's internet usage policies during our last audit of online activity. We are attaching evidence for your review and action. Thank you, Martin Shore, IT Dept. Head

Lily gave a long sigh. It was the first time an employee had been caught looking at porn on company time, though it was certainly bound to happen eventually. She took a breath and gave herself a little hope. Who knows. Maybe it wasn't porn at all. Maybe Joe was on poker stars or he was shit talking the company on social media.

But as she opened the attached list of websites, she knew that those hopes were false ones.

Sixty-two websites were enumerated and organized by the date of first access. Accompanying the list was a breakdown of how many times each site had been visited and how long he had spent there. Lily whistled softly to her empty office. With these kind of numbers, it was a miracle Joe had gotten any work done. At the very least, he should be getting fired for theft of time.

She opened the first site and was shocked to see only text. Only a glance would tell you that it was almost certainly smut, but still. If he was going to try to get away with porn at work, text was certainly the most effective method for staying under the radar. And what exactly was "erotic mind control?" Out of curiosity, Lily found herself reading the whole way through the story. She wasn't too prudish to admit to herself that he might have been onto something here. Certainly not appropriate for work! But this was certainly… having an effect, shall we say. Perhaps there was some unidentified fetishes still hiding in that brain of hers.

Site number two was actual porn. Just straight up pornography videos. She closed it quickly, lingering just long enough to catch sight of a few choice body parts. She was human after all.

Sites three through eighteen were all social media pages once again dedicated to this mind control stuff. It seemed there were an impossible number of sub-genre's to this already incredibly niche thing. Lily was fascinated. The pages were stories and videos and audio notes. Most fascinating were the pages seemingly dedicated entirely to flashing gifs and spinning graphics. She found herself scrolling through them slower and slower.

She never noticed when her left hand had left her keyboard.

More porn. More smut. More porn. More spirals. More spirals. More spirals.

By the time Lily reached the fiftieth website, her pants were around her ankles. She didn't know how many times she'd brought herself to completion. Her eyes were glassy and unblinking. The words in the stories and the images and comics burned into her psyche. And oh. The spirals.

The spirals.

She wished she could stop and stare at each one forever. But she had a job to do. She had a list to complete. Link sixty-two opened to a website that Joseph had accessed just this morning before she'd arrived. The site was a full screen spiral. Black and white with streaks of red and blue that made it seem more real than reality. And in the middle there was a button that simply read "Submit?"

She clicked it immediately. The button disappeared, leaving her staring at the spiral alone. She had no more work to do. The list was complete. She could just stay like this forever.

The door to her office opened and Joseph entered, followed by Martin.

"I'm so happy you were the one who got to review my file, Miss Villanova," Joseph said. He snapped his fingers and Martin locked the office door and began to undress. "Martin here was the first to comb through my activities. He did just a good job cataloging everything, don't you think? He had to look so long and so close to compile that report. He was shooting his first load before he'd finished reading that first story, weren't you?"

"Yes, Master," Martin said dully as the pair approached.

"He tastes quite nice, Lily," Joseph said right in her ear as she helplessly masturbated to the spiral. "You'll see."

Thanks for reading! If you are a fan of my work, consider buying me a coffee. Any contribution is insanely appreciated. 💖

[sergle]

yall are about to piss me off by not having any PASSING basic knowledge of the way the u.s. military manipulates its recruits into joining by typing up one of your uninformed, unresearched, unempathetic, individualistic, unbelievably annoying posts about how 100% of the people in the military ended up there because they just Love America So Damn Much! they're extremely mature and informed at time of recruitment, they can totally leave anytime they want, they totally had tons of other avenues in life they could've taken, there was no rush at all to get income as fast as possible, and everyone in the military also totally is part of the combat divisions and personally enjoys being IN the military very much, big believers of violence. everyone in the military is shooting guns all day, that's how that works. they LOVE BLOODSHED. also I love the "amewicans haha" twang to this type of shit because you're actually TOTALLY stealing our Thing, which is turning systemic issues into Individual Issues. Instead of talking about the powers that be, it's so Personal Choice up in here. It's, "well you shouldn't have done it then. I totally wouldn't because I know better." you don't wanna talk about the military industrial complex as a whole, and you don't want to talk about recruiters, you just want to pin the blame on Specific Individual People one-by-one, as if they're responsible for the system that they're being ground up in. someone was in the military? bad person, no matter what. it's easier to believe that, I guess, than to acknowledge that Normal People (with high school educations) are manipulated and incentivized into joining a system that is Bad. at like age 18. but yeah no that 18 year old should have just been smarter lol haha anyway here are some screenshots for no particular reason

side note this reply of someone going "umm just get loans and go into a high paying field it's easy XD" as a direct response to someone trying to explain how most americans joining the military are being funneled in that direction out of a need for money.

and another person who Decided that americans join the military just CLENCHING their teeth thinking of other people, and not thinking completely selfishly about their own selves and their own income/housing/healthcare.

[eikichi-supremacy]

If nothing else Koenma is a Kuwabara stan and I'm right there with him o7 (I need to write the kuwameshi fic that goes with this fr)

[vialae]

Really enjoy the idea that as Gortash and Durge’s relationship progresses over however long, Gortash gets more and more used to Durge’s lurking and hiding in dark corners, and as a result it becomes more and more difficult to make him jump.

Like at the beginning of meeting and working together, Gortash’s head is on a swivel as he keeps wondering when that serial killer will seemingly appear out of nowhere once more.

But then like several years into it, he is strolling into his office which seems to be empty, but then he starts talking very conversationally at full volume about how they should now be moving on to the next part of the plan, knowing full well that a voice is going to respond from the darkest recesses of the room where you can see at most a pair of glowing eyes.

[ghosted-jazz]

Congratulations to the Kites and their new members who have totally normal faces!

[fraternum-momentum]

apartment hunting lead me to a job interview tomorrow, wish me luck 🙏😭

[acquired-stardust]

Final Fantasy Tactics Playstation 1997

[qqueenofhades]

I am now being actively courted by TWO master's programs at the university. Terrible dilemma, etc.

[fluentisonus]

*narrator voice* and she took that as a challenge

[greyjade00117]

You all remember Scar's faction choosing? Yeah, it's been stuck in my head and my coursework and deadline ridden brain can't stop thinking of angst so, here we go.

So I can't stop thinking how p!Scar keeps saying that he let his crew sink, and also said he let his family sink during the Faction day. That's basically saying that he considered his crew as his family right???? Right?????

And he say he 'let them sink'. Like he didn't stop it. Or couldn't stop it. My brain wants to say that he is feeling guilty for being the only survivor while his crew, his family, died with the ship. And he couldn't bare the thought of making another family, only to loose them too because he couldn't stop it.

And sure, he is a great conma.... I mean, salesman, but that also means he is good with lies, so who's to say he isn't lieing about his feelings???

[laurentidal]

Ms. Opal

When Jenkins had hired the pretty young girl as his secretary, a lot of the other women in the office felt threatened. Penny was that youngest among them by probably a decade, and she immediately began getting extra attention from all of the men in the office. The older assistants were all great at their jobs and they were treated well, but they also enjoyed being flirted with just a little by the bosses.

That all stopped when Penny arrived.

Any flirting that was done, was done to her. Any conversations to be had were had with her. Any spare time was spent with her. And worst of all, any bonuses that were awarded were awarded to her. That was really the last straw.

Tabitha, one of the most senior members of the secretarial pool, brought her concerns to Jenkins himself. She explained that four months had gone by since Penny joined them and not a single secretary had received any bonuses except her. She claimed that this was blatant favoritism and that it had to stop. Jenkins tried to put her mind at ease by telling them that Penny had been assigned certain duties that the other secretaries didn't have. He admitted that this may have given her an unfair advantage. To solve this, they were going to have Penny train a few of the older assistants to do the same job and re-balance the incentives.

Tabitha left the office feeling validated. She had always respected Jenkins, and she was happy that he had listened to her concerns.

The next day, Penny sat herself on Tabitha's desk just before lunch.

"Ricky told me I'm supposed to bring you up to speed," she said, voice almost dripping with sweetness. Tabitha had spoken to Penny before, and - for her part - she definitely understood why the men favored her. That didn't mean she had to like it.

"Oh," she replied. "I didn't realize I was one of the ones he wanted retrained. But sure! I'm happy to take on whatever they need."

"I suggested you," Penny said, and Tabitha swore she was her eyes flick down to her chest and hips. "I think you've got what it takes."

"Well thank you," Tabitha blushed, not really knowing why. She stood and followed Penny back to one of the unused offices. Penny closed the door, leaving them isolated. She again sat herself on top of the desk in this room. Tabitha couldn't help but admire the way she looked perched there on high. She took a seat in the chair in front of her.

Below her.

"How long have you worked here, Tabitha?"

"Eight years," she answered, staring up at the woman who seemed to loom over her, despite her short stature. Penny's foot lightly brushed against Tabitha's leg, catching her attention. She glanced down at it as Penny began to swing it lazily back and forth. When had she kicked her shoes off?

"You must know this place inside and out. I am not about admitting a mistake. I should have brought you onboard first thing. I apologize."

"I appreciate that," Tabitha replied, unsure where this was going. She absently pulled her own shoes off with her feet as she continued to watch Penny's.

"It must have been so frustrating seeing me succeeding so quickly. You must have been all knotted up about it. But now you can relax. We're on the same team."

"Same team…"

"That's right, Tabby. You and I want the same thing. We should get along. We should be focused on the task at hand."

"Focus…"

Tabitha had always hated the name Tabby. Jenkins had called her that on her first day and she'd told him in no uncertain terms to never do it again. But she didn't mind it from Penny.

"My goodness you are suggestible. I'm impressed you were able to go stand up to Ricky with how easily you're going under here. Though I guess it did take a few months. No, no, Tabby. Keep looking at my pretty foot. That's where your eyes want to be. Stare at my smooth swinging foot and my pretty painted toes while I tell you about the job."

"Pretty…"

"I've taken the minds of all the men in this office. They don't really need them for anything, after all. They all watched my feet and dropped so deep. They sucked my toes and licked my cunt and padded out my bank account. You're going to do two of those things for me today. Then I'm going to resign."

Tabby just watched and nodded.

"I've had my fun here, and you deserve the position more than me. When I hand in my notice, I will instruct all my little office slaves to obey you the same way they obey me. You're the office siren now, Tabitha Opal. I will tell you Ricky is the best fuck and Bill has the best tongue. Jon isn't really worth your time. Beside, it fun to leave him needy. Now. On your knees so you can thank me properly."

In the weeks ahead, Penny served out the duration of her notice. The other women were thrilled to have a level playing field back. Tabby started dressing a little less conservatively. She found clothes that accented her curves, and even without Penny's parting gift, she could have gotten almost anything she wanted from her bosses.

Her daily meetings with Ricky became much more fun. She even began to notice some of the other secretaries in ways she hadn't before. She felt she'd been awakened. She wondered if Cindy's pussy tasted as good as Penny's had. She kicked off her shoes and went to sit on Cindy's desk.

"How would you like to be part of a special department?"

Thanks for reading! If you are a fan of my work, consider buying me a coffee. Any contribution is insanely appreciated. 💖

[sibeal]

afternoon at red rocket

[american-boyboss]

[llama-aesthetics]

Ms. Scatter 👓

Ms. Scatter works as Mr. V's assistant during the Villain Recruitment Program, or the Six Pose Dance Show in the Human World. Originally from our world, she loved fairy tales growing up and dreamed of being a princess. However, as she grew up, she learned life was not a fairy tale and that there was no magic that could make her life any different than it already was. 

She became a disgruntled office worker in Tokyo, Japan. One day, she wandered into an old antique shop that seemed to have popped up out of nowhere and she decided to take a look inside. Upon entering, she saw there was no one attending to the shop. As she looked around, she came upon an item that was covered by a white cloth. Curious, she removed the cloth to reveal a black mirror. Entranced, she touched the mirror and was transported to another world.

There, she met Mr. V, Ms. Villa, and Mr. Polite, who eagerly welcomed her. They explained to her that she was no longer in the Human World, but in the World of Fairy Tales. More precisely, the land where villains lived. They explained that the residents of this world could only interact with the Human World for one night, Halloween, as that is when magic is at its peak. Or when there was a powerful magic item in the Human World that could connect the two worlds together.

Mr. V gave her the option to go back to her regular life, but after taking some time to consider it, Ms. Scatter decided to stay and become his assistant in the Recruitment Program. He was surprised by her decision and took her under his wing.

[wherabouts-of-light]

at the rate Grian is annoying people with the permit office thing he may be the target of the obligatory war