#really? right in front of her salad? etc

[fukiana]

BALDUR'S GATE 3 (2023) dev. Larian Studios "Well—whatever you're into."

[ssahotchnerr]

fluffy aaron thought of the day: a summer barbecue with the bau. jack and ellie having so much fun in the pool with their aunts and uncles, eating a perfect summer meal and then being put to bed. relaxing outside in twilight, listening to everyone laugh and be happy and love each other. joking and teasing, but knowing you couldn't ask for a better family. being nestled into aaron's side as he gently presses kisses into your forehead, his lips etching that unforgettable smile into your skin. watching the sky turn all sorts of beautiful and just being content. basking in the summer air and the love of all those around you ❤

aw this is perfect (especially for today!!!!) cw mentions of food and drinking

hehe jack and ellie quite literally spend the whole day at the pool 🥹 you have to force them out when it's time to eat, to reapply sunscreen, and they're persuading everyone to get into the pool with them 😭 hehe ellie musters up soooo much courage to jump off the diving board (she wants to be like her big brother 🥹) and aaron's a nervous wreck as he watches her LOL. she knows how to swim, both her and jack completed swimming lessons when they were really young, but he still can't help it 😭 he sooo much more prefers ellie launching herself off the side of the pool, or when uncle derek joins - he's throwing her up into the air and she lands in the water, and then of course he does the same for jack too <333 hehe meanwhile dave and aaron are bbq-ing up, while you and the girls are getting the other food out - pasta salad, watermelon, corn on the cob, etc. - while also enjoying the fun drinks penelope brought along 🤭<33

you know it's time to get them out of the pool when ellie starts getting fussy whenever jack splashes her😭 the sun's just about the set - lightning bugs are coming out, crickets are chirping, the sky was pink/purple and now it's succumbing to that dusk blue. so ellie's all burrito-wrapped in her towel, on aaron's lap as she dries off, but she quickly falls asleep right then and there because she wore herself out 😭😭😭😭😭 aaron gives you such a sweet and content smile when you find the two of them 😭🥰🥰 hehe so you take her from aaron, tell jack to come on, and you take them upstairs and get them ready for bed <333

but after :'))))) you're alllll cozied up with aaron a little off to the side from the team, sitting on a comfy chair. more so, aaron's on the chair, you're all comfy on his lap 🥰 your head is laid against his chest, his arm is wrapped around your front, with his thumb softly grazing the patch of skin he can find, pressing gentle kisses on your head or temple or anywhere he can reach. hehe he's basking in it all just as you are 🥹 - you have two most wonderful kids fast sleep inside, you're surrounded by the best group of people, and you have each other 🥹💓😭 (these kind of moments always hit aaron hard - never did he ever think this would be his life - after allll the hardships 🥺)

everything is just perfect <333333

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

compos mentis 1

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, age gap, chronic health issues, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: After a long court case, your mother stays attached to her lawyer, bringing even more contention into your life.

Characters: Andy Barber

Note:Double does of Andricus.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

“My lawyer will hear about this!” Your mother snarls and you shy away. 

She always has to make a scene. You don’t even understand why she’s doing this. All they did was forget to put a fork in the bag. The poor employee behind the counter looks ready to snap as they wipe their sweaty hands on their apron. 

“My daughter is sick and you can’t remember a fork! It’s so much for her to come back in here!” She snarls. 

“Mom, I could wait in the car--” 

“Be quiet. Oh yes, I want corporate’s number, right now. I will be certain my attorney gives them a call about you...” she squints at the girl’s name tag, “Tina!” 

“Mom, please,” you pout. 

“Oh honey,” she turns and pets your head dramatically, then look at the worker as she cradles your face and adjusts the tube under your nose, “look at her. Look what you’re doing to her.” 

You hold back the flood of tears. You hate when she does this. You just want to be invisible but she always has to make you front and centre. She always has to tell everyone how sick and helpless you are. 

“Mom,” you moan. 

“Ugh, whatever,” she tears away and snaps her fingers, “give me the fork. And I expect a complimentary salad as well.” 

“Ma’am, we can’t do that,” Tina says dully. 

“What do you mean you can’t do that?” 

“Here,” Tina reaches under the counter and pulls out a card, “that’s the number for head office. I’ll grab you a fork.” 

She turns and takes out one of the bamboo forks. Your mother snarls and squeezes the card until it folds. She snatches the fork and throws it back at the worker. 

“Are you kidding? She can’t eat with this! She’ll get splinters.” 

“I want to go, mom,” you whine. 

She shrugs off your touch on her arm, “Mr. Barber, DA, will hear about this!” 

She stomps and spins. You turn slowly to follow as she’s already halfway to the door. You're already forgotten. You roll your tank with you as you curl your shoulders and awkwardly angle it through the door. 

Your mom’s a bluffer. Andy isn’t the DA. Not yet. He’s only the assistant. And he isn’t her lawyer. Not anymore. Once she won the lawsuit against the hospital, he traded in that title for boyfriend. And now she has a ring on her finger which means he’s soon be stepdad. You don’t think you can ever call him that.  

You avoid him as much as you can. Not because you dislike him, because you don’t know him. Aside from him coaching you to take the stand, you didn’t know much about him. You don’t have the energy to know more. Besides, he isn’t there for you. You’re just the unfortunate burden left for your mother to care for. 

You get to the car, heart racing, and shake as you struggle to get the door open. Your mother has the engine rumbling already and you can barely move around as you’re too dizzy to set your feet. You fall into the seat and strain to drag the oxygen tank between your legs. You really should have more space. 

You wiggle your chafed nose. Your mouth and nostrils are always painfully dry. You get your belt on and reach into the belt bag you keep on you at all times. You santize your hands from the mini bottle then take out the vaseline to apply to your dry skin. 

You lurch back as your mother veers out of the lot. You jostle with the movement and struggle to put the cap back on the tin. You tuck it away at last as her bluetooth dials out. 

“Andrew,” your mother greets the Assistant DA before he can speak. He sighs. You’ve heard him tell her over and over not to call him that. “You won’t believe what just happened. The way they gawk at us when we’re just trying to live like normal people!” 

She squawks on in one of her rants and you can only sit there and listen along with the man at the other end of the call. In the background, you make out the shuffle of paper and typing of keys. You shift as your mother cranks the real and you hear something rustle. You look back and groan. 

“Mom, the food spilled,” you utter. 

“Andrew!” She ignores you as she grips the steering wheel tighter, “are you even listening?” 

“Yeah, I heard. The food spilled. Why don’t you come by the office? I’m just finishing up. I’ll just take you ladies out.” He offers. 

You really don’t want that. You don’t like to go out. You only went to the wrap shop because your mom insisted after your last appointment. You’re always exhausted after all the tests. 

“Oh, gosh, that would be lovely,” she trills, “how about it, honey?” She doesn’t wait for your answer. “I’ll head over there right now. I hope you don’t mind, I won’t have time to change. We had a long day with the doctor.” 

“That’s fine. I just need to send these notes over and I’ll be all done,” he explains. “How about you, sweetheart? Feeling up to some linguine?” 

You don’t realise he’s talking to you until he says your name clearly. You gulp, “yes, sir.” 

“Oh, silly,” your mom reaches over to swat you, “she still calls you that.” 

He chuckles from the other end, “big changes. We’re all adjusting. Anyway, see you shortly. I got someone at my door.” 

“Bye, sweetie,” she sings and the line dies. 

She huffs and rolls her eyes. Her smile falls away. “I bet it’s that damned legal aid. Have you seen the way she dresses? Oh, how she flutters her eyes at my fiance?” 

You just grumble and nod. As usual, she isn’t looking for two-sided conversation. She tells, she doesn’t talk. 

“This will be nice. A family dinner. All of us. Honey, you really do need to loosen up with him. The wedding will be here before we know it.” 

You shrug, “I know. I’m not... I’m trying.” 

“I know, I know. The case was so much and then to think, it brought us all together. But this is the best we can hope for. The settlement is great but taking care of you, it’s so much. It’ll be nice to have help,” she chatters on. 

You zone out her usual gripes. She has a way of complaining about you without really saying it outright. You know you’ve made her life harder. Always sick, always helpless. You asked her to hire you a nurse with the settlement but she convinced you to put the money in a trust. It will be worth much more in ten years, honey... 

She pulls around the building with its staunch white pillars. The sight of them casts a wave of deja vu over you. You thought once all was said and done in court, you’d never have to come there again. It’s humiliating enough to be gawked at in public but to be put in front of an audience like that... 

You’re just sensitive. That’s what your mom says. She’s right. You wouldn’t know. You’ve never had to be on your own. She’s always been the one doing everything. 

She parks and gets out and you carefully lift your tank out of the car, not wanting to touch the cold shell. You stand and lean on it, rolling it ahead of you. You follow her inside as she hardly misses a beat. You can hardly keep up. 

She steps onto the elevator and tuts at you to hurry up. You get on and she hits the buttons impatiently. You get off on a floor, letting her lead you as you keep your head down. Her clicking heels keep you in line. 

“Danica,” Andy greets your mom by name, “just in time.” 

“Mm, there you are,” her response is curt.  

You look up at Andy as he leans on the desk of his aide. She’s a pretty blond woman named Gwen with shiny nails. She smiles as he stands on his own weight. 

“How are you?” Andy offers a one-armed hug. 

“Good,” she wraps him up and plants a kiss on his cheek as he dodges her lips. “How are you, sweetie?” 

“Tired, long day,” he replies stiffly. He looks at you, “hey, you look beat.” 

“A little,” you mutter. 

“You sure you’re up to it? We can just order in,” he offers. 

“I’m okay,” you say as your mother looks at you sharply. Better to just do what she wants. 

“I don’t mind,” he insists. 

“Oh, but sweetie, you said we’d go out. Don’t you want to have a nice dinner with your fiancee?” She smirks at Gwen. 

You want to turn into dust. This is torturous. You’re light-headed and uncomfortable. Andy keeps his arm around your mom, “see ya, Gwen. You get going. I don’t want people thinking I’m a tryant.” 

He struts towards you and puts his hand on your arm to turn you around. You walk beside him and his touch falls to your lower back. You want to pull away but you can’t. The wheels on your tank squeak with each step. 

You’re happy to detach from Andy as the elevator doors open. You wait and your mom steps on first by Andy doesn’t. He waves you in ahead of him and grunts. He doesn’t rsay anything to your mom but you can sense tension. 

“How about I drive? You can come with me in the morning and get your car,” Andy suggests, “save some mileage.” 

“Oh, that would be so nice. I’d love some chardonnay with dinner,” she bubbles. 

He steps between you and taps the button. His sleeve brushes you as you hunch lower. Your head is really bugging you. You just want to sleep. Or maybe you’re just hungry. 

“Looks like it hurt,” Andy points to your bandaged hand. You peek at it and shake your head. 

“IV. Just bruised,” you answer. 

“Ah, no fun,” he remarks. “Well, now you don’t have to worry about the hospital bills, huh? Got you all tucked away.” 

“It’s so wonderful,” your mom latches onto his arm. “You take such good care of us, baby.” 

“Mm, doing my best. Can’t be easy with a sick kid.” 

“No, no, not easy. But oh, you helped so much. I mean, how dare that hospital just dismiss us like that. They could’ve killed her. Malpractice if I ever saw it, and you would know, being a lawyer and all,” she says tritely. 

You stay silent. You don’t like talking about it. It’s over, so why do you have to keep reliving it? She seemed to bask in the attention it got her while you hated every minute of it. 

As you stare at the bottom of the doors, you feel a tickle on your hand. You wince but don’t pull away. You think, at first, it’s a stray hair. You glance over and find Andy rubbing his finger against your hand. You grip the handle of your tank tighter and swallow. What is he doing? 

He stands with his head straight, his shoulders high, as if he’s doing nothing at all. Maybe he doesn’t realise. You don’t move. You’re frozen in indecision. You don’t want to pull away in case you embarrass him. 

Surely, it’s unintentional. You’re just some sick woman still living with her mother. You’re frail and helpless and you can’t even breathe on your own. 

No, it’s just a mistake. A mix-up. He’s probably lost in thought, the way he gets. When he sits and stares at you but sees nothing at all. 

The elevator opens and he rescinds his touch. He waves you through first, and you shuffle ahead of him. Your mom follows and he brings up the rear. You need to sit down soon. 

You go outside into the cool evening air and make your way to his car. Your mother stomps ahead in her heels but he stays at a pace with you. You can never keep up. As you reach his SUV, you hesitate. You forget how much bigger his car is. So high up. 

“Can I help?” He offers as he follows you to the back door. He opens it for you as you spin your tank around. 

“I’m... okay,” you lift the tank first and he quickly scoops his hand under the wheels to help. You grab onto the door to haul yourself up. His hand brushes your hip as you do and you swing into the seat. “Thanks.” 

“Not at all, sweetheart,” he lays his hand on your knee and gives a quick squeeze. “You sure you don’t need anything?” 

You shake your head and close your eyes. You’re completely worn out. You need to save what little you have left for dinner. 

“Alright,” he lets go and shuts the door.  

He gets in the front as your mother hums, “let’s go. I’m starving.” 

[604to647]

Safest with You - Ch. 15 (The BBQ)

7K / Modern AU Retired Mob Enforcer!Din Djarin x fem!reader

Summary: You and Din attend a very special Fett Family BBQ hosted by the Damerons and you grow closer to the clan.

Warnings: 18+ Content (MDNI please). F!oral, semi public car sex, unprotected PiV, rough-ish sex, established relationship, pet names as usual (pretty bird, baby, etc.), light daddy kink (really just a nickname).

A/N: Din's back! This is mainly a world building chapter with some heat at the end 🤭; it's not perfect but I wanted to put it out and get back into the groove of this story again. Thank you to everyone who waited patiently while I took a little posting break for this series. I missed them a lot and hope you're ready to jump back in it with me!

Series Masterlist

“Do you think we should have brought anything else?”

“One item should be good, pretty bird.  Lisa always makes too much food anyways,” says Din, looking down at the casserole dish full of garlic knots that you’re holding.

“Okay.  I just always feel like more food is better than less food,” you say, unsure.

“I think that's enough garlic knots to feed an army, sweetheart.”

“But Mayfeld asked for them!”

Din stops you at the end of the walkway leading up to the Dameron house and plants a soft kiss to your lips, “Thank you for feeding Miggs, baby.  If his mouth is full of your garlic knots, then we don’t have to hear him talk as much.”

“Din!”

He laughs and takes your hand as you head up to the front of the house, “Come on, admit it.  Mayfeld is your least favourite Mando.”

“He is not!” you’re scandalized by the accusation.

“Okay... who is your least favourite Mando then?”

Looking at Din with a look of mock annoyance, you jest, “Sometimes, it’s YOU.”  You swerve the hand that drops yours in an attempt to at swat of your bum. 

Letting yourselves in through the front door, you follow the chorus of voices to the kitchen; spinning as you walk through the foyer, you take in the splendor of the Dameron residence.  Not sure what you expected the house of an heir to a mob empire to look like, but you suppose this is as close to anything you might have imagined.  The house is fairly grand and seems to boast an inordinate number of chandeliers; dark carved wood and marble line the floors and walls - it looks like a good place to set a live action game of Clue.  When you round the corner to the kitchen, you’re struck by two things:

1) Din was right, Lisa made too much food.  Nearly all the counter top space is covered with plates and platters filled with meats, salads, breads, pastas.  You count eight charcuterie boards – they might be delineated by cheese region.  There are warming trays that have their bright blue butane flames lit underneath, already full of steaming dishes.  The breakfast nook seems to have been converted into some kind of dessert station with a 3-tiered buttercream iced cake at its centre.

2) Poe is being yelled at.

Din leans over to whisper in your ear, “Yes, it’s always like this.”

Poe spies you and Din and must decide that this is the distraction he’s been waiting for, because he gestures at his wife to turn around and welcome her guests.  You meet Lisa halfway, somewhere between the cocktail shrimp and the gazpacho; after hugging you and taking the garlic knots off your hands, she sighs and asks, dejectedly, “You wouldn’t happen to have Caesar salad dressing in your purse, would you?”

“Not today, sorry,” you quip.

“We can use another dressing!” Poe is holding his head in his hands.

“No,” grits Lisa through her teeth, “we cannot. It was requested.”

She says the last word with heavy emphasis; you take it that Poe was supposed to procure the Caesar salad dressing.  Din looks at you with an expression somewhere between amusement and a grimace, then mime points at the empty plates before giving Lisa a friendly squeeze of the shoulder.

Not letting him escape quite so easily, Lisa directs her question at Din but keeps her eyes fixed upon her husband, “Din.  Please remind Poe how very important it is that we accommodate the literal one food request that our very special guests made for today’s BBQ?”

Oh.  That’s why the Caesar salad is a big deal.  Although, you’ve been told, Fett family BBQs are a regular festive occurrence, this particular iteration was going to be more than the usual casual get-together.  Din had already given you the heads up that a few members of the Pyke Syndicate would be in attendance tonight and for a very special reason: Boba’s niece (by which sibling, you embarrassingly could not recall.  Boba seems to have a lot of siblings) had gotten herself engaged to Rikard Pyke, son of the head of the Syndicate.  It could have all been very Montague and Capulet-esque, except that young folks tend to more pragmatic than their elders gave them credit for; there was no secret relationship or ignoring the realities of their families – the happy couple openly announced their decision to date years ago after connecting at some unsuspecting mutual friend’s birthday party and had been inseparable ever since.  They weathered all of their respective families’ strong attempts to discourage the relationship, some deeming it impractical if not downright dangerous, with grace and unwavering resolve.  Cassandra and Rikard simply ignored all the naysayers and family politics and proceeded as two people in love would under normal, non-mob related circumstances:  they courted, they moved together, they intended to marry.  Tonight would be your first time meeting them, but you’re already predisposed to liking them.  Everyone in both families seemed to love them quite well and Din’s opinion was that they seem to be very much in love, a nice couple indeed.  “Rikard has a good head on his shoulders.  Seems like a good kid,” he had said.  When you chucked that he said it as if he hadn’t done a deep background check on the poor kid, Din had simply shrugged, looking sheepish.  The happy couple, however, were not the special guests to which Lisa was referring. 

In an effort to support the engaged couple, the Fetts and Pykes have been playing nice, knowing (and perhaps in some cases, resigned to the idea) that their families were soon to be connected by marriage.  You’ve been told that tonight, a few members of the Pyke Syndicate would be attending the BBQ as Cassandra and Boba’s special guests.  An extension of trust, a gesture of good faith, a coming together of brethren.  And apparently, they wanted Caesar salad.

Din attempts to hand Lisa an empty plate, perhaps to encourage her to eat as a distraction, but Poe quickly snatches it out of Din’s hand, likely afraid of Lisa throwing it at his head.  It’s not often you side with Poe, but you think he might be on to something.  “Does it have to be a specific type of Caesar dressing?” you ask Lisa, drawing her attention away from Poe.

“No,” she sighs, “they just asked for Caesar salad.  I would make one but I don’t have all the ingredients.”

“I can make a simplified Caesar vinaigrette? We can even make it a little spicy if you want,” you offer; it’s actually a fairly easy recipe - people who have tasted it always marvel that it doesn’t contain any anchovies, “Why don’t I make a batch?  You can taste it and see if it works?”

Lisa looks torn between wanting to kiss you and not wanting to let her husband off the hook so easily, but eventually the need to get things done wins out.  When Lisa turns to the fridge to get you the parmesan and elephant garlic you ask for, Poe mouths ‘I love you’ at you before escaping out the back door.  Din brings you a glass of wine before leaving with his own tower of food. 

You make quick work of the dressing, all while listening to Lisa vent about her husband’s inability to remember the simplest tasks; you nod at her sympathetically which seems to calm her down significantly, “Oh, I’m so sorry for venting.  I’m just so stressed out!  This barbeque has to go well!  The wedding is in a few short months and there is still so much I have to do!”

“You’re planning the wedding?” you ask, somewhat shocked.

Lisa nods, “I have help, of course, but Boba and Rikard’s dad, Lom, decided that it might be easier to keep the peace if someone other than the parents or higher-ups was in charge of the planning.  Someone more neutral,” she rolls her eyes, “You know, if you had started dating Din a few months earlier, it might have been you!”

You both giggle uncontrollably at this. 

Lisa is giving your vinaigrette the thumbs up when Fennec comes in, carrying a little white pit bull in her arms.  Lisa looks like she wants to say something about dogs in her kitchen, but thinks the better of it; you, on the other hand, greet Fennec warmly and Mochi with scritches and kisses. 

“Everything okay in here?” asks Fennec, “The Mods say that the Pykes are about 25 minutes away.”

You grin at the mention of the Mods.  While you haven’t met any of Fennec’s personal team of spies yet, you’re terribly curious about them.  Where the Mandos handled physical security, which could sometimes include on-site surveillance and reconnaissance, the Mods were straight up digital sleuths; they could dig up online dirt on anyone and no one has ever been beyond their digital reach. Apparently able to hack into even the most secure systems, they never failed to locate and capture footage of even the most elusive of targets.  You once wondered if Fennec had them dig up info on you; it was probably their most boring assignment to date if she had.

Their stealthy online behaviour unmatched, the Mods were just as elusive in the real world, often hiding in plain sight and doing their jobs expertly, unnoticed by the crowds.  You’re not sure how they managed to blend in so well given that they were all supposedly gorgeous and impossibly stylish – which is how they had come to be nicknamed The Mods (short for “The Models”); a fun fact you learned when you asked if the name was somehow a play on the Mando moniker.  Your hysterical guess of “The Mondos?” had earned you a tickle attack from Din that took your sides the better part of an hour to recover from.  Nevertheless, they had all been at Boba’s birthday and you can’t say you noticed any of them; though perhaps with everyone at that party having been dressed up to the nines, you had a lesser chance than usual of spotting a Mod.  You’re going to be on the look out again tonight.

“Everything is perfect!” beams Lisa, spearing a few dressed romaine leaves and a crouton on a fork and holding it out to Fennec.  You giggle as you watch Mochi try to lap at the fork with his little tongue; booping him on his little nose to distract him while Fennec eats, you coo, “You can’t have that, Mochi – it has too much garlic.”

Fennec makes noises of approval as she chews, “Good.  Everyone is on high alert, but once our guests eat and get comfortable, hopefully things will relax.”

With Lisa satisfied, the three of you make up your plates to head out and join the others in the backyard.  Just before opening the backdoor, Fennec turns and shrugs at you, “Oh.  Mayfeld saw Din and asked about… garlic knots?”

You giggle while Lisa rolls her eyes.  “No problem,” you grab the dish with your free hand and Lisa holds the door open for you and her to join the lively scene together.  The backyard is huge – the stairs from the deck descend to a large patio area, currently home to several L-shape formations of patio furniture, one of which is arranged around a fancy gas fire pit.  Several barbeques sit on the border of the patio and lawn, heat waves and smoke emanating from the food being grilled; Brian and Poe currently doing their best grill master impressions.  The expansive rolling lawn is littered with tables and chairs, ending only where you can see a pool filled with laughing and splashing children.  The entire backyard is bordered by a beautiful flower garden that wafts a sweet, sticky floral scent atop the aroma of cooked food.  There are dogs everywhere and you wish you had brought Al.

It's around one of the tables on the lawn that you find Din sitting with Boba and some Mandos, talking probably in a manner probably more serious than you would expect for a BBQ, but that doesn’t stop him from pulling you into his lap when you approach and encouraging you to stay and eat with a squeeze of your waist.  You hand the dish of garlic knots to Mayfeld who is already making the grabby hands gesture at you; when he’s got a firm grip on the casserole dish, Paz reaches out and smacks him on the back of the head, without breaking from what he’s saying to Boba, “… Peli says she’s okay.  Had to talk her down from staying behind with a baseball bat though.  We got it patched up before coming over.”

You look wide eyed at Din, worried.  Paz sees your expression as well and with a nod from Boba, loops you in, “Just a little vandalism, Lil’ Lady.  Someone just broke the knob off the drycleaner’s front door so Peli thought she was trapped inside before remembering she has a back door too.”

Nodding, you try to make a face like you’re relieved it’s ‘just a little vandalism’, but that must have been scary for Peli.  You know about the flare up of these types of incidents and other similar skirmishes from Din, of course, but you’re mainly removed from it all except for what Din tells you.  But Peli’s is close.  You know her.  The low hum of something… something like escalation feels like it’s just around the corner. 

“Peli is okay, pretty bird.  Not letting her stay with a baseball bat is safer for everyone, really,” Din smiles gently at you.  You grin at the image of Peli brandishing a baseball bat with her excitable mannerisms and think you agree; a pensive look crosses your face shortly after however, “It’s so close to the gym, though.”

Boba nods, “Too close.  The gym is safe – no one would be stupid enough to come near it.  But those nearby may be targets just because of proximity.  Paz – I trust you and Din to draw up patrol plans.”  Paz and Din nod - both men realizing, as well, the significance of Boba feeling confident enough to speak on security matters in front of you.  The implication is lost on you though, as you continue to eat Lisa’s delicious pasta salad while Din draws circles on your thigh, grinning proudly. 

Boba shifts topics, “Ok, when the Pykes get here, I want the perimeter already covered and everyone in flank positions, but discreetly.  This is supposed to be a fun time, alright?”

Everyone around the table nods, Bo and Paz get up to prepare, but everyone else remains, eating and casually chatting until Fennec announces, “They’re here,” after getting a notification on her phone.

Man, the Mods are good, you think, as Poe and Lisa disappear into the house even before the front doorbell chimes.  Poe’s exuberant voice can be heard from the backyard getting closer and closer until the kitchen door opens and he and Lisa step out, followed by six strangers.  The first two must be Cassandra and Rikard, the happy couple; they’re both beautiful and their easy-going smiles as they wave and greet everyone give you the sense that they’re the ones really grounding this entire, very unique, situation.  Behind them are four men, ages ranging from mid-20s to Boba’s age, each holding a plate loaded heavily with food.  With amusement, you notice the abundance of Caesar salad on each of their plates.

You feel Din’s lips by your ear, as he quietly acquaints you with tonight’s special guests. “The youngest one is Gorak – that’s Rikard’s cousin.  Kind of a little hothead, dabbles a bit in the boxing circuit.  He’s not bad, but no discipline, so we don’t see him in fights often.  The two twins are the uncles, Mok and Dokk; they head up some business lines for the Pykes that… Boba isn’t involved in.  There's no business conflict, so they’ve always been friendly.  The tall one in the back, that’s Marg, he’s like the consigliere – the Fennec to Rikard’s father.  He’s going to be here on behalf of the parents.”

“Rikard’s parents didn’t want to come?” you ask, curious.

“It’s not that.  It was decided they shouldn’t attend; if they did, it might look like business, like the Families were coming together for more than a barbeque.  Could make some other players nervous.  Sometimes the perception of an action means more than the actual intent.”

Oh, you think you see.  You suppose you have a lot to learn about this world. 

Fennec is right, the initial moments of everyone coming together is sort of awkward and tense, but after everyone’s got some food in their stomachs, things start to relax and the vibes in the backyard mellow once again.  All of this is helped along by Lisa’s excellent hostessing and Poe’s charm. 

Din introduces you to Cassandra and Rikard, and you’re immediately taken with them.  They’re smart, funny, and just incredibly down to earth.  You can see why this is the couple that could lead the two Families to put down their pitchforks.  They’re both junior associates at a law firm downtown; it’s not a firm any of your clients use but you mention that you have a friend, Jen, who practices family law at another firm, and the three of you trade some funny case anecdotes.  When the conversation turns to wedding planning, Din and Rikard excuse themselves while you, Lisa and Cass (as she now insists you call her) join some others on the lawn.

Cass is stressed.  Wedding planning is no joke and time consuming - time she doesn’t have a lot of; you remember your days as a junior at your firm and the hours being indeed relentless.  Even with Lisa and her aunties’ help, you can see she’s feeling at a bit of a loss.  You don’t want to volunteer Rory’s expertise, but you do offer to do some research on some vendors, figuring you can always ask Rory if your research results are up to snuff.  Cass says she wishes she was marrying you.

When Cass’s mom notes that you wore a lovely white dress to Boba’s birthday, you mention the name of Rory’s bridal boutique and all the women collectively swoon.  Apparently, they haven’t even bothered to try and shop there due to the exclusivity, but know all the best designs are there.  You very noncommittally say you’ll ask around to see if there are any openings, and find yourself in the middle of a very exuberant and high-pitched, squealing group hug.  Straining your neck out from the tangle of arms, you see Din and Paz looking over laughing.  Din is giving you a “What’s going on?” gesture with his hands while smiling broadly.  You smile back and mouth, “Help!” with good humour.

After the children are put to bed or taken home early, the drinks start to flow and the party hits a new level.  Someone brought cigars (Mayfeld?) and Boba and the Pyke men all partake, furling a light haze of smoke that hangs around the patio lantern lights.  You enjoy your wine while helping Lisa cleanup, periodically being pulled into side conversations with Cass or Mandos you know.  As much as you can, you curl up in Din’s lap and listen to him joke and chat with his friends.  It’s turned out to be a wonderful evening, despite you still not having spotted any of the Mods.

“I think they’re made up,” you whisper to Din, jokingly.

“No, no, they’re very real, they just live in the wires,” laughs Din, “like the Matrix.”

“Oh!  Well, if they look like Keanu and Carrie Ann Moss, then it’s no wonder they’re called the Models,” you say dreamily.

“Keanu, eh?  Is that your type?” Din nudges you ear with his nose teasingly.

“He’s everyone type,” you grin, still with a far-off look.

Din pretends to push you off his lap, “Well if that’s the case, then –” but he’s interrupted by raised voices coming from the middle of the lawn.  The two of you look over and you see Woves and Gorak facing each other, standing bodies rigid in aggressive stances, their lawn chairs tipped over backwards behind them. 

You can’t even process what they’re yelling about, just that the volume is increasing and the tone is getting sharper.  Koska comes to stand by Woves, her look murderous.  You see Jimmy and Brian inching closer.  Mok, Dokk and Marg have already come to stand behind Gorak, backing him up.  Dogs everywhere are barking.

Din gently slides you off his lap, then moves you behind him before walking towards the commotion; he extends his arm behind him as if to ask you to stay put.  You look around: Lisa looks panic stricken, Poe is standing with Cass and Rikard, all three of them looking at a loss, Boba remains sitting with Fennec.  Remembering your little lesson about interpreted actions from Din earlier this evening, you understand why: any move Boba makes will be perceived as an official move by the Family, and it will embolden the Mandos, likely turning a small altercation into an official first strike from the Fetts.  If he were to enter the fray, the situation would escalate no matter what.  As it is, the situation is escalating all well on its own - the Pykes are outnumbered and surrounded, their hackles up. 

Boba catches your eye and gives you a little nod and your eyes soften in comprehension.  Every step that an official Fett family member takes right now counts as a move against the Pykes, but you’re not official.  You’re just you.  You follow Din and see him hovering with Paz in Woves’ periphery, both men holding their shoulders taut and their fists clenched.  You slip between them easily and slide your hand over Din’s fist, his hand relaxes instinctively and opens to hold yours.  You look up at him with a gentle expression while giving his hand a reassuring squeeze and watch as the tension melts from his handsome features and rolls off his body.  He seems to calm and understand the situation at your touch.  Your other arm links through Paz’s and he looks down at you, surprised at your appearance.  You watch as his expression and stance also soften under your calm hands.  He and Din look at each other, comprehension passing between them and they turn in unison and walk away.  You continue to move closer to the action, picking up your casserole dish which has a lone three garlic knots remaining, and you gently push it into Mayfeld’s hands as you come up next to him; at your encouraging smile, he also seems to come to – grinning back and trotting off in the opposite direction while stuffing his face.  Suddenly you’re not the only figure that’s weaving between the figures still locked the stand-off; Cass and Rikard have come over to pat the arms of the uncle twins, telling them that this isn’t anything to get worked up about.  Poe throws his arm around Jimmy's shoulders in a playful manner, and you hear Lisa’s voice call from the deck, “I’m turning on this chocolate fountain now, and I expect every person here to help me clear this dessert station!”

There’s a beat of silence before Marg calls out, “Is there any more Caesar salad?”  Everyone laughs and just like that, the tension is broken.  Even Gorak and Woves stand down, and although they don’t make nice, they both turn to head in with everyone else; Marg’s steady hand on Gorak’s shoulder keeping him at a distance from the Mando.

Din’s waiting for you at the base of the stairs, wrapping his arm around your waist as you file up the stairs with everyone else; you nuzzle you head a little into Din’s shoulder and half jokingly say, “Is this really a good time to be giving everyone fruit skewered on pointy sticks?”

Din turns when he hears a belly roaring laugh at your joke coming from one of the Pyke uncles, and looks down to see you turn and give the man a heart stopping smile and wink.  He can’t believe it - you cheeky flirt, he thinks, making a rival family member fall in love with you.

Inside, you load up two dessert plates for yourself and Din and bring them to a side counter where he’s chatting quietly with Boba.  You’re almost hesitant to interrupt but when you slide the heavy plates onto the marble, Boba smiles big at you.  He hands you Mochi and then places both his hands on your shoulders and leans in to kiss your forehead, “You did good, my dear.”

You scrunch up your face in mild embarrassment, “Oh, I mean… it’s okay…” not sure what to say so you just start feeding Mochi strawberries.  Boba looks at Din and reiterates, “She did good.”

“Yeah,” Din echos softly, his eyes watching you with a mixture of pride and love.

---

After stuffing your faces with dessert, you and Din escape to the backyard for a private moment and to avoid Lisa’s attempts to force more food on your plates.  Finding the seats around the roaring fire pit empty, you sit with your back against the corner piece, legs draped over Din’s as he pulls you close.  Foreheads pressed together, he kisses you gently and sweetly, not wanting things to get too heated should the two of you be interrupted.

“Thank you, pretty bird,” says Din quietly.

“For what?”

Din looks thoughtful, even though he’s the one that brought it up, “I don’t know how you do it.  You bring the calm.”

You confess and joke simultaneously, “Do I really?  I have to admit, I don't always feel very calm. Are you sure I don't bring the chaos?”

Din pinches your thigh with love, “I’m serious, baby.  Somehow you melt away all the stress and make me see clearer.  Not just me either, saw you do the same thing to Paz tonight.”

You give him a little kiss and nuzzle his nose, whispering conspiratorially, “... you make it sound like I have powers.”

“Whatever it is, you bring me back to myself when I need it the most.  I love you, pretty girl.”

“I love you too, Din.  I love that I can do that for you, soothe you and bring a sense of calm.  You do that for me too, you know?  You’re my rock, baby.”

Din presses his lips to your, beckoning you to open up to him and when you do, he lightly strokes your tongue with his, eliciting a low groan from the back of your throat that you think might be too scandalous for this barbeque.  Pulling away slightly, you nibble a little on Din’s lower lip before tucking yourself into your favourite nook under his jaw and shyly bring up something you’ve been thinking about for a while, “You know, Din… if you’re ever stressed or have had a hard day, and you need something more than a calming touch, you can… use me?”

“Hmmmm?” Din looks down at you, not sure if he’s understanding.

Feeling timid under his piercing gaze, you press on but keep your face pressed to Din’s neck so you don’t make eye contact with him, “Like… if you’re frustrated, and you need to take it out on some… one.  I can take it.  Let me absorb all the bad… and like you said, melt it away.”

You feel Din’s hard swallow before he gives a little cough, “Pretty bird, are you saying you want me to take out my frustrations by fucking them into you?”

You nod, “If you need to, Din.  You can use me for stress relief.”  Finally having the courage to look up at him, you find Din's eyes warm and loving as he whispers just one phrase, “Dream girl,” before descending on your mouth again.

Your kissing is sensual and open, a connection between two people who have no secrets and can be their purest, most vulnerable selves with each other.  Din’s touch is tender and reverent and you worship him right back, letting him know you’re there and you can be whatever he needs, whenever he needs it - you love him so much.  The two of you don’t break apart for a long time, not even when people start spilling back into the backyard. 

---

The evening ends an hour or so later with everyone leaving on pleasant terms.  You’re thanked again for both the salad dressing and your help with the upcoming wedding.  A final toast is given by Boba to the happy couple and it warms your heart deeply to see two people so in love and so steadfast in their commitment to face and conquer adversity together.  The cheers elicited are joyous and genuine, the evening a great success.

Walking back to Din’s truck, hand in hand, you’re sated with good food and drinks, carrying the festive feel of the evening with you as you hum a little tune to yourself.  Din trails a little behind you, filled with a surge of pride for all that you are. 

And that you’re his. 

He’s parked about fifteen cars away from the Dameron residence, a little past the last house on this block where the road rounds into a large turnabout bordered with lush trees and other flora and fauna meticulously maintained by the neighbourhood HOA.  He hadn’t meant to park so far but now he’s glad he’s got you away from the prying eyes of Poe’s neighbours and their porch cams. 

While you may currently be carefree and lighthearted, Din is full of deep emotion.  He’s overwhelmingly proud, in love, and awestruck.  His head is full of you.  You, you, you.  His admiration isn’t new: you’re sweet and funny, smart and kind - he’s always been proud just to know someone like you, and even prouder to be with you, to be the one you choose.  But tonight is different, it’s a different type of esteem – one that threatens to explode out of his chest.  You.  You’re it for him.  He never thought he would find someone like you.  Someone who could fit so seamlessly into his life, into his world, and make both better.  You helped.  You were sweet and kind and giving to everyone.  You brought calm.  You made things good.  And you were his. 

He had believed you all those months ago when said you wouldn’t judge him or his family, but you did more than that: you accepted them as your own too.  Yes, you did it for him, but it was really just who you are.  Loving.  Giving.  You brought calm to all their chaos.  You made things brighter.  You made them stronger.  Him better.  He loves you so much right now he thinks he’s going to burn up.

As soon as you reach his truck, Din grabs you by the waist and spins you so you’re facing him and he pushes you into the side of the car, arm bracing the back window to cushion your head.

“Di-!”

His lips put a stop to your words as they crash against yours.  Normally so gentle and asking of permission, Din’s mouth is an unstoppable force tonight, kissing you as if there’s an overflowing pressure building inside him and kissing you is his one release valve.  An unashamed moan works its way up from your throat, escaping only when Din moves his aggressive kisses to your jaw and neck, leaving you opened-mouthed and panting.

“Oooohh, fuck!  Din, baby, what are you doing? Oh- god, that feels so good,” eyes closed, you’re already arching into him, pulling him closer to you by the back of his neck.

Din’s hand that isn’t cradling your head is on a frantic journey down your body.  He needs you now.  The current state of his feelings is running too deep, he can’t seem to articulate it to you or even himself - he has to show you.  Triumphantly, he finds the tie to your dress and pulls, causing half of the front of your dress to fall open, “Din!  We’re out in the open!”

Clawing down your partially exposed body, clamouring to find the inside tie that separate him from your soft body, Din pauses only to pull you away from the car so he can unlock the door; as soon as it opens, he walks you backwards and hops you up onto the seat, scooting you back so your legs dangle out the door. 

“There,” Din says huskily, as he finds the little knot on the right inside seam of your dress and tugs so it unfurls, “you aren’t out in the open anymore.”  He spreads apart the fabric of your dress so that you’re presented to him in your pretty pink mesh and ruffles lingerie set; he sucks in his breath. 

“Just for you, daddy,” you coo.  You knew Din wouldn’t be expecting something so flirty and naughty under the dress you had picked for what was supposed to be a casual and wholesome family event.

“Fuck.”  With his big mitt of a hand, Din pushes you down and lowers himself on top of you, nipping at your breasts and teething at your nipples through the soft sheer fabric of your bra.  He’s not gentle; he has something to declare tonight, and soft and sweet just won’t do the job.  His hands paw at your tits while he continues to tug and twist with his mouth; you’re writhing and whimpering beneath him, body set alight - the thought flashes through your arousal muddled mind that you might actually come just from nipple play alone tonight.

Then Din’s gone, mouth and hands traveling down your body, bending his knees and bracing them on the baseboard of his truck, Din kisses your navel and trails his nose down the front of your panties, “Mmm, so fucking sweet, pretty girl.”

“Din!  Pleas-please,” you cry out, turned on out of your mind by the debauched imagery of your bare legs hanging out of the car while Din presses his face to your cunt; you need him to touch you.

“You need daddy’s tongue, baby?”

You can only mewl and nod.

Din isn’t in the mood to tease tonight, he’s too pent up with near paralyzing feelings of veneration for you – he’s ready to worship.  Pulling back slightly so he’s face to face with the darkened spot on your panties, he hooks them to the side to take in your glistening pussy, watching it want and ache for him for just a moment before he dives in.

He devours you.  Tongue licking and stroking your slit, Din swirls the sticky mess already pooled into his mouth and stuffs it back into your cunt with his open mouth kisses.  You shudder and grab onto Din’s hair as he fucks his tongue into you, pressing him deeper as your hips start to move all on their own.

“Fuck – yes, ride my face, pretty bird.”

“Ngh – Daddy! Feels so good.  Love how your mouth feels on my needy pussy,” you moan as softly as you can so the sound doesn’t carry out the open car door.

As your hips start to buck a little harder, Din’s hands move back up your body and start worrying your nipples again; still sensitive from his attentions earlier, you gasp and arch your back, grazing your clit against Din’s nose.  You let loose a high-pitched whine, eyes flying open, “Daddy!  Right there!”

Grinning so hard you can feel it, Din continues to feast on your dripping hole but angles his face up so that his strong aquiline nose nudges your throbbing clit again.  Rewarded when your grasp on his brown curls tighten, he starts to prod your bud in a pattern, alternating between pressing and releasing, and drawing sloppy circles with the tip of his nose.  When he feels your legs start to shake and your walls start to clamp down on his tongue, Din speeds up his attentions on your bundle of nerves, burrowing his nose in deep and rubbing vigorously, shaking his entire head.  Your hands release Din’s hair at the onslaught and fly up to cover your face, as if you can somehow hide from what’s coming; when Din’s hands pull up on your nipples, you crest and scream – tumbling over the edge and letting yourself be carried away by the waves of your orgasm.

Arm now thrown over your eyes, you’re too focused on catching your breath to feel Din pulling your ass past the edge of the car seat and turning you over so your mouth is pressed into the warm leather.

Only after the tip toes of your shoes touch the asphalt does Din flips the skirt of your dress over your back, and that’s when you register the cool breeze of the night air hitting your ass.

Din spoons your bent over body and murmurs deep in your ear, “Gonna fuck you now, bunny.  Not going to be gentle, okay?”

Your eyes are still closed as you nod into the seat and whisper, “Okay, daddy.”

Din takes out his cock, already hard and weeping with precum, and slaps it against your creamy pussy - once, twice, three times; each slap causing you to give a little jump and shudder in anticipation of the incoming intrusion.

Chuckling darkly, Din notches the tip at your entrance and pushes in as he folds his body over yours, holding you close and pinning you down as he bottoms out.

As promised, it’s not gentle; but here, in the backseat of his truck, where his chest is flattened against your back and his face pressed to your hair, it’s intimate.  Rough and hard.  Loving and full of feeling.

Din’s voice is low and gruff in your ear - words of praise and all his overwhelming feelings spill out as he ruts into you at a demanding pace.

“Do you know how perfect you are, pretty bird?”

“You’re everything.” 

“My everything.”

He drives into you over and over, punching the air out of your lungs each time.  Whenever you inhale, Din captures your lips with his immediately after – as if trying to steal these breaths as well.  Fervent kisses the only break from his ongoing ramblings of praise:

“So proud you’re my girl.”

“You’re so good to me.  So good to my family.”

Thrust.  Thrust.  Slap.  Slap.

“You know how much Boba trusts you?  Trusts my perfect girl?  Talking about Mando business in front of you.” 

Thrust.

“You’re one of us, baby.” 

Slap. 

“My girl, welcomed into the fold.  Fuck – I’m so proud.”

The squelching noises of your wet cunt being punished reverberate through the truck’s cabin, accompanied by the percussion of slapping skin and an obscene harmony of grunts and moans.  You can only hope that your sinful symphony is confined to the car and not travelling through the otherwise silent neighbourhood.

“Fucking saving Poe’s ass and the entire BBQ with that fucking salad dressing.”

Sqlch. 

“You don’t even know how important you are and the things you do are.  You impressed the fucking Pykes, pretty girl.”

Sqlch. 

“Helping with the wedding?  You’re so sweet, so fucking sweet…”

Fwop.  Fwop.

Din’s weight continues to pin you down and crush your lungs in the best way possible.  Between the panting from the pounding your pussy is taking and the way your clit is twitching against the seam on the edge of the leather seats as Din ruts into you, you can hardly take a proper breath; the lack of oxygen is leaving you dizzy and light headed – you’re quickly barrelling towards oblivion again.

“You don’t even know, you don’t even know…”

“Perfect, perfect, perfect, perfect…”

Thrust.  Huff.  Thrust.  Huff.

“You don’t just take care of me, you take care of my family… you accept my family.”

Thrust.  Thrust.

Din’s hips start to stutter, he’s close, so close. 

“You’re the only one.  The only one who can do what you do.”

Huff.

“You prevented that fight.”

Thrust.  Huff.

“You have me wrapped around your little finger, baby.”

You can barely draw enough breath to chant, daddy, daddy, daddy, daddy...

“Not just me.  Paz. All the Mandos.”

Slap. Slap.

“Sexiest, most powerful woman there tonight.  Every night.”

Thrust.  Thrust.

“Pretty bird, what did I do to deserve you?”

Slap.  Slap.

“Don’t deserve you.”

Thrust.

“But you’re mine.”

Din’s babbling praise ends with the growl of that last, possessive proclamation and the contrast of his tone, the sheer power and darkness that laces the word ‘mine’ compared to the honey-dripped praise that’s been pouring from his mouth the whole time he rails you, snaps the tightly coiled band in your core and you come, clenching hard on Din’s length with a force that sends him straight to the moon.  He grunts and pants as he spills his seed deep, claiming you and clawing all he’s professed to love tonight for his own.

After lifting off of you to allow your breathing to even, Din wipes the sweat off his brow and looks around to make sure that your activities haven’t attracted the attention of any of Poe’s nosy neighbours.  Satisfied that the two of you are still alone, Din presses butterfly kisses down your spine before gently turning you over and helping you right your underwear and retying your dress the best he can.  You’re hot and tired, still drunk on the mind-blowing orgasm brought on by Din’s rough handling and his heavy praise.

Tenderly kissing you, Din murmurs, “Do you want to just lay down in the back seat, sweetheart?  You can sleep while I drive home.”

You shake your head drowsily, “No, I want to ride up front with you.  I like it when you hold my hand when you drive.” You’re smiling so sweetly at him, Din thinks his heart might explode.  He’s just laid his heart bare, practically smothering you with it and letting his all-consuming love burn you up, and you still want more of his touch.

Grinning like a fool, he buckles you into the front seat of his truck, “I love you, pretty bird.”

“I love you more, Din,” you purr back, eyes half closed, a soft, sleepy smile tugging at your lips.

After he closes your door, on his way to the driver’s side, he shakes his head to himself, Impossible.

[rootspiral]

Agatha All Along deep dive: episode 4 part 3

(Wandavision entries: [1][2][3])

(AAA entries: ep1 [1][2][3][4] ep2 [1][2][3][4] ep3 [1][2][3] ep4 [1][2][3])

Lilia is bickering with Jen in episode 7. she turns around and SEES ALICE, WHO WAS KILLED IN EPISODE 5

alice, don't try to save agatha! but she's whisked ever further back to episode 2 before she can finish the sentence. imagine having the power of communicating with the past but it's never enough to warn them. seeing the dead and talking to them, knowing what's going to come next. and you wonder why she chose exile and solitude.

meanwhile agatha has collected her wits long enough to decide what her short term strategy with rio is gonna be: keep her distracted, isolate her from the others, keep her away from billy. see how she takes a moment to focus and get into character? she knows rio is about to follow her like a moth to a flame

just going on a trip with my best gal pals and a random teen boy, nothing to see here!!!! and agatha knows that rio knows that she's lying. hello, rio is PERFECTLY aware that there's no Road out there capable of magicking her into a glam rock sex den. but maybe, just maybe, agatha can keep her focused on something else. honestly it would be such a waste to not put all that combined cleavage to good use!

there she was, having a chat with sharon down in the dirt, and you guys went and dragged her up. like perfect morons. I love how she brought the flower along and it ends up working really well with the outfit

oh, rio knows. she knows everything.

and agatha SHOOTS UP and GETS TOO CLOSE and FLIRTS. oh my god this bitch. just like she did in episode 1, except now she's more collected and ever more deliberate. flirting is her best weapon of mass distraction against rio. because look, rio might know all her tricks but she's only (very marginally) human! who can blame her if she lets herself be seduced a little bit, just a little bit! for old times' sake! in rio's defense her wife is very hot and she misses her very much, your honor

rio is like, bitch I got you allllll figure out but also lemme gently caress your thigh. to enhance your acting performance. what's a little supportive yes, and between exes

she's sooo hamming it up. compare her face here with the genuine yearning at the end of the episode

oh this is hilarious. the others hear rio's flirting over the PA and panic, but no, girls, enthusing about murder is legit how they talk dirty!! (lol at lilia being like, right in front of my salad???)

"gasp!!!! that's my coVEN you're talking abOUT!!!! I'm not that kiND OF wiTCH anYMOWRE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" the ham! the ham! she might just bring the whole deli cart over at this point

and rio with her lil delighted laugh again. she doesn't get mad for one second, she didn't expect anything else. oh agatha, you silly goose, you're so damaged and so cute

let's recap what this fucker achieved with her latest performance, because it's always fascinating to study what's going on in agatha's ferociously scheming brain. she 1) distracted rio from billy. or at least tried to. 2) hinted at Rio's true nature to the others - who knows, maybe she can manipulate them into allying against her later on? 3) pretended to flirt but also flirted a lil bit forreal because there was a lot of skin showing and the flesh is weak etc etc 4) backpedaled alllllllll the way out when things got too intimate because she's too scared and resentful to get close to rio again. playing with fire as usual. or, as the kids say today, fucking around, about to find out

alice's trial has the best aesthetic fr fr. the 70s font!

I'm not 100% sure bcs it goes by so quickly but I think rio is dancing to the cursed music???

not the turntable!! that shit's vintage!!!!!!!

*brian de palma zoom*

*dramatic pause*

WE'VE BEEN CURSED (I love you patti lupone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

INJECT THIS AESTHETIC DIRECTLY INTO MY VEINS. also alice is red, billy and agatha are blue with purple undertones. the colors in this trial seem very deliberate

"she's a tourist." "she's a PSYCHO." look she never gets to just hang out and do fun things anymore, let her be!!

rio and lilia having a little staring contest as she plays with the knife. doing their own cute archnemeses thing

agatha shaking her head at billy and going shhh when he says 'maybe this curse isn't so bad.' like KID will you stop speaking HORRORS into existence?!?

alice standing with her back straight for the first time since like, ever? or since her mom died? did everyone in the family have their own personal demon or did it switch after killing the previous person? or wait, wait, was the curse only like, a metaphor until billy accidentally turned it into a disgusting 1970s animatronic harpy??

I'm convinced rio could see the demon from the beginning. look at her face here, she's the only one who sees both lilia burning and what's causing it

poor lilia must be thinking, burning witches? soooo original and not traumatic at all (lol at patti being a pro at screaming and writhing in pain on the floor. PROFESSIONAL ACTING)

no no no that's the reaping knife careful careful careful careful

alice's spell: expelle hoc malum, expel this evil. (rio when agatha tries it on her later: WHO ARE YOU CALLING EVIL)

lol. lmao, even. (just don't think about how jen has grown seLFISH TO SURVIVE AFTER HAVING TO LIVE POWERLESS AND DEFENSELESS FOR A CENTURY AND HOW SHE BECOMES MORE AND MORE GENEROUS AS SHE SPENDS TIME WITH ALICE AND LILIA)

oh noes my character just had a beast's giant talons perched on her shoulders i should flash the twins real quick so you can see it better

everyone else: EXTREME PANICKING

rio: stops reading her magazine to glance at the disgusting invisible harpy flapping around the room. goes back to the magazine.

and with this I'm off to my extreme friday night (tea and blankie and a book). ciao!

[riverofrainbows]

Ok so the black book episode.

I finally watched it.

It could have done with a double feature. There was so much going on. And it worked, emotionally, but it was a lot. The plot was so fucking condensed.

Fuck when they do something they do it right, don't they. The deaths of the three were fucking harrowing. No fanfare or dramatics, just realistic and dead.

I'm so goddamn impressed by Sophie playing 12 different people. I love her. I know she gets a lot of recognition, but she deserves some more. Holy shit her voice training skills must be off the rocks.

I thought they would have hired Quinn for the police officer, he looked kind of similar, and then i thought it was him and Tara. But with Sophie being on phone theatre, of course Nate was free.

I wonder how fast Sterling figured it out. I think about half a minute into the room with Nate. The rest was just playing along, and hesitating whether to actually go through with the con, while setting up an outcome for both decisions. Usually i really don't think he has it all immediately figured out, but usually he isn't at quite that high alert, and the target isn't that clear and big a deal.

It really should have been a double feature, or a movie length episode. There needed to be more time, to really lay it all out.

I like what they used as the contents and method of collection for the black book. I watched another show (can't remember which) where it was some unsourced collection of various evil people, and that was soo shady and frustrating.

I've come across a bunch of Sterling/Nate shipping by now, and I'm starting to agree. Like that is genuinely a love story for the ages. However i am firmly convinced that it is entirely mental and intellectual. I just really can't see them having any relationship type. Not that Sterling wouldn't fuck Nate but that's just Mark Sheppard's insane gay flirting aura. But mentally, those two are having mind sex, and are tragic soulmate lovers. Also because they have divorced vibes. I'm convinced of the headcanon that they were in a couple friendship driven/held up by their wives socialising, and played 6d time travel chess mind games over barbecue (aka having a mind sex love affair right in front of the salad) (but really low key because they wouldn't actually cheat on their wives).

The way the con failed and they died was really realistic and well done and really stressed me out :(((( not over that.

Also the way this confirmed the Hardison-Eliot ship (platonic or romantic) was. Very much canon thank you. Not to mention the "till my dying day". Like hello??? Also the ice cave and rundown job train scene having already confirmed the depth of Eliot-Parker's bond earlier in the season. (But toxic masculinity and being a show from 2009 impeding the Hardison-Eliot part till the last episode/them dying (rituals to touch other mens skin etc etc flashbacks to superhell love confession sth sth bury your gays (except they lived bitch)).

Also the setup with "do you think you could live a normal life" earlier in the season. Also², annotation to that one: Eliot talking about having to help Hardison's restaurant, as if Hardison didn't buy it for him.

I liked the part about order vs justice. Very 'keeping the peace with an abusive person causing more harm than upsetting status quo'.

It's a good ending for a show. Seriously, it's both end of an era and not destroying everything that was before. Still glad we got leverage redemption tho obviously.

Parker being the new mastermind is great

Her monologue ajsbsjjd. I was cackling so bad. It was a fantastic way to really cinematographically tie up the show though, and she is great for the job. Both Hardison (who already has enough to do) and Eliot (who really doesn't like leading) always get way too deep into stuff, including their respective jobs for it, which is one reason why they're so good though don't get me wrong.

Why did she have slicked back hair with no bangs, and weird eyeshadow :( Awful 1/10. One point for her clearly thinking she needs to put on hair gel for stepping into a Nate role for a con, like that is exactly a logic she would have.

Eliot's blue tinted glasses, love it.

I like that they're not having one of the guys do it just for misogyny reasons, and that at the same time her doing it is very well supported and set up by their characterisations, and not as some sort of disrespectful shoehorned girlboss feminism move. Which ends up with a woman being the new mastermind being actually well done too. Because they never do annoying stereotypes at leverage, and thank fuck for that.

I love that Sterling was there for the last episode. Also, i swear, getting used by Nate for a con (while getting something out of it himself) is a kink thing for him. It happens genuinely almost every goddamn time we see him, while he knows and actively plays along.

I want to see more of Sophies telephone theatre :(

How the fuck did they fake the car accident, they should have shown sth on it.

Only because i knew very securely that they were fine did i not get completely freaked out at Hardison lying there on the ground. And i never ever want to see Eliot gargle up blood ever again. :((((

I was 100% convinced that Parker can hold him with just one hand, i was so shocked. Honestly one of the first clues from the story itself that it was fake. Yes i have that much trust in her. Second clue was the balloon.

No actually, first clue was Nate looking at the cameras. Can't remember which first clue came first in the episode.

I thought Nate gave Sterling something when he distracted him from the trio, and clearly Sterling also thought so, he probably took like several seconds to check if he had gotten anything slipped into his pockets afterwards.

I wish we could have seen more of the "you lied to us?" conversation at the end. Not that that wasn't the tldr of it or needed change, but i want to see the whole conversation.

The tunnels were great. I again wish to have gotten even a crumb more information on that.

It might have done well, and I'm just throwing out ideas here, to be a two parter episode, they could have really used some extra space. The plot was really condensed.

It was q good episode, and a very good ending, something oh so rare in tv shows.

[myobsessionsspace]

hi i need to say this to SOMEONE 😭 but the general fandom is soo weird about jikook. whenever i see tiktoks the vibes of the comments are so different when its jikook. its so normal to see stuff like "thats his baby" "soulmates" "they love each other so much" "i love them together" when its abt any other pairing but for jikook tiktoks its just comment after comment of people emphasizing the word friendship. like fandom cannot interact w jikook content unless they make sure EVERYONE KNOWS that theyre JUST FRIENDS and i do not see this with other pairings and i do not understand why

Hi Lovely,

You can always come say things here 🫶

It’s crazy because I was just talking to a friend today about something similar!!

I was saying to her that I don’t even want the general public or all of the fandom to ship Jikook. I just want them to acknowledge them as close.

To be honest there are unhinged shippers in everytime subsection, Jikookers included. It’s understandable people that want no parts in shipping because it can go really left of the field, from the hyper feminisation of Jimin, the hyper masculinisation of Jungkook, the a/b/o tropes that people want to fit into everything they do, the hyper sexualisation of them, trying to make their every breath about the ship etc.

It’s understandable that lots of people want to just enjoy the members without all that extra.

What’s not understandable is the total erasure of Jikook even being BFFs, the super focus on certain duos that are not as volatile territory like ‘woah, thighs’, and how it’s fun to trend ‘rapper’s girlfriend’ but crickets from the fandom as a whole and only real noise from jikookers when ‘Jimin Hyung can handle it’ ‘I’m not that easy’ happed in front of our salad?!

That’s not US taking it there, that’s THEM 😩

My friend and I were saying that there are people that do see more when it comes to Jikook but because there aren’t enough big spaces that embrace the unique aspects of Jikook they try shipping spaces, but it’s not for the weak hearted. Some just see Jikook as interesting but not down to the #jikookisreal level and so when they dip their toes in they dip right back out.

Becca aka @wingzie did a post on how there are more jikookers than we may have thought:

I do get you anon, but I’m not so bothered if Jikook were to be acknowledged as ‘just friends’, heck I rarely see Jimin and Jungkook’s names in the same sentence unless it’s with the inclusion of other members or their musical records.

To be real, I care more that they’re not acknowledged as BEST FRIENDS, as closer than close. I see a lot of ‘that’s his baby brother’ ‘that’s just Jimin, he’s like that with all of them’, don’t even get me started on the pass around Jimin narrative that some use 😑.

I too see on a whole some actions that Jimin & Jungkook do that jikookers think is just for Jikook that truthfully isn’t, that can be seen with all seven. More jikookers do need to start dispelling those misguided Jikook lores in addition to dispelling anti Jikook narratives.

BUT I also see when there are things just Jikook that get skilfully ignored.

It’s super frustrating but at the same time it’s not. Because, really, do we want millions upon millions trending every little thing about Jikook if they are real and not explicitly out? I’d rather have the ones that can’t see anything because they have underlying prejudices to stay not seeing anything, because do Jikook need those kind of eyes on them?

Maybe a smaller bubble of jikookers being convinced and spotting their moments, in comparison to the fandom as a whole acknowledging something different with Jikook vs other ships, allows for jikookers to to keep jikooking ‘safely’.

The majority of people that DO see Jikook, see them for the unique softness, fondness, adoration, sweet words and actions, fun and spicy bond they have and want to celebrate it and protect it.

Appreciating Jikook doesn’t need to have millions of people. To be honest with or without us watching, Jikook will keep Jikooking. So let those that see them, enjoy and let those that don’t see them, miss out on a beautiful thing.

Thank you for being comfortable enough to send me your ask.

💜

[meepmoopdraws2]

Since my hand has been hurting too much to draw I give you my unhinged unfiltered not proofread thoughts… K so like I know what Ryan and Oliver keep saying… and I hear them… vulnerable this… new that… I love you to the core blah blah… but I need them to be so realistic about this. What do you mean we’re going to see them interact in new ways we haven’t seen before. Um yeah freakin right… the only difference is going to be that their going to acknowledge that their doing it in front of our salad. NEW? U mean they’re gonna flirt, cry, be touchy, be parental, be honest, be gay, be nervous, happy, not subtle, never not together, telling each other everything? Angsty when they’re sad? NEW? WHY DO U THINK WE SHIP THEM IN THE FIRST PLACE. Sorry it’s making me laugh but I just don’t believe them “new”. New my a*s. You’re just going admit that we’re not complete clowns. The only ONLY thing that would be new that I can think of is them actually talking about their relationships. Buck dating a guy and Eddie’s sexuality arc? But not their dynamic. That will not be new. Just louder?

Side note: Since the beginning of this show Ive been rooting for a bisexual Buck who just is. He knows who he is, Maddie does, and people are just oblivious. Basically that the extent of his “coming out” is him just talking about whatever and it’s a non thing… like “omg I dated this guy who was obsessed with alligators” and we move on. Its so powerful to have that kind of rep too. Even if they have a realization arc for him this season I would rather it be something more along the lines of him getting asked out by a guy or vice versa and him being like “at some point I felt like I had to fit the majority so I just stopped letting myself feel anything for men. Ive always liked them ive been with them…” so on and so forth. Or “yeah blank asked me out and we had fun” and blank is a guy and no one is like “U LIKE MEN?!” Or even if they are he’s just like “yeah haven’t you been knew?” Imo the realization arc there should be more Eddie realizing he’s jealous of Buck even when he’s with a guy”

On the other hand-Eddie’s sexuality arc is a really beautiful opportunity. Especially him talking with Athena and Bobby. Cause I feel like Eddie would have so much guilt or has so much guilt. Like he feels like he wasted so much of Shannon’s life when he was never able to love her in the way she loved him and then she died. And Bathena are obviously like “sometimes life works out that way but you got Christopher and a beautiful friendship and nothing would change that-do you really think she would hold that against you.” And Bobby is like “I got a second chance” Athena js like “I don’t regret that love it led me to such a beautiful thing.” Etc etc. and Eddie realizes Athena is Buck. Okay now im rambling and incoherent byee

[oodlyenough]

aa5 update while i'm thinking of it:

finished 5-3 turnabout academy the other week and honestly i enjoyed the hell out of that entire case, lol. i thought the npcs were all funny (robin is the MVP), a lot of the reveals were hilarious, i am dual destinies klavier's #1 fan apparently.

assigned prosecutor at birth

the lore of Law High School was something i'd seen mentioned in fandom sometimes and i always rolled my eyes at how stupid it was but in true ace attorney fashion it was in fact SO stupid it came all the way around to being hilarious. themis pumping out under-educated self-described prodigies who only know how to eat hot chip, forge evidence and lie. funny as hell. junie and apollo's weird oedipal moment right in front of klavier and athena's salads was hysterical.

i love the idea that japanifornia has stricter age limits for being a crane operator than for being a lawyer or a judge. hugh the 25 year old deciding to go to themis instead of ... regular law school.... so he could experience the triumphs and defeats, the epic highs and lows of high school mock trials is funny as all hell

athena's ptsd sprites are pretty haunting looking, i have to say.

have since started 5-4 turnabout cosmos and so far it's not quite as bonkers fun but i'm enjoying it ok. more under the cut:

it feels like we're finally going somewhere and building to something, with athena lore and apollo lore and blackquill lore, etc. i remain ambivalent to simon but i am thrilled to have finally met his hotter meaner gayer sister and i can't wait for more of her. truly what dual destinies has lacked to this point is a mean woman. deliver me, aura.

unfortunately all the clay-apollo lore is goofy as hell to me, but "goofy" is still more enjoyable than "boring" so i'll take it. the "i'm fine!!!!" thing is IMO a classic example of when a prequel tries to explain something that never needed explaining. it's just not that poignant of a phrase to make the crux of this relationship, and clay never being mentioned before is so mels pond/Jack Black in that one episode of Community-core.

ah yes, we all remember that classic scene from ace attorney 4: apollo justice where apollo talks to his best friend clay.

finally: this is the funniest thing they could possibly have written to follow up on a game that ended with apollo's long lost mother knowing exactly who he and trucy are ...and fucking off out of the country to sell albums without ever telling him.

why do we bash deadbeat moms for not being there for their kids and never question if the child has bad vibes or is unpleasant to be around

a lot of my earlier complaints about DD stand -- primarily and foremost that it's ridiculous how much this game doesn't want to be a game. we are skipping so many opportunities to investigate, to present, to connect the dots ourselves as a player, even fingerprint minigames and stuff like that just get auto-completed by athena. i like athena as a character, but i have to wonder if part of the "mary sue" criticism i've sometimes seen is just misguided frustration about how much she autonomously solves puzzles for the player instead of letting the player participate lol.

but considering how much i really thought 5-2 monstrous turnabout was just. like. absolutely brutal. a devastating low point for the franchise ... at least 5-3 and, to this point, 5-4 are more interesting. thank god

[lurkingteapot]

Last Twilight ภาพนายไม่เคยลืม Ep 6

another episode that's UP THERE. Goodness. The watch blog is even more incoherent than usual, consider yourselves warned.

Day is like deflect deflect deflect

god that hangover remedy looks TOXIC

oh fuck I didn't clock that August clocked the flower, ffff

aah I love On

I don't love August

afadsfas Mawk

posturing, oh nooo

how does a wrist wrap make anyone collapse? oh wait, he fell and hurt his wrist?

PIZZA

product placement, huh

oh god Mawk is SO jealous

ajaan On!!!

i see August did NOT get a glass of water

I love On

Mawk seeing a CHANCE huh

August like …

oh god this is STRESSFUL I love ittt

the touching-letting go- touching is. SOMETHING.

are you still talking about the shoes, Day?

this house is so cute

I love Phawjai so much

oh goodness, Mawk's FACE just now

Jimmy's really come far

oh man, are those his own? ohh he fixed them

calling it now the flower thing is gonna be merch too

that was a n extremely fake looking stumble right now, sorry not sorry, you've both done better

we're back to the unspecified time story time!

is August flirting or … what

Day definitely is

asfasdfasdf I love On

Mawk just openly pining in front of everyone's salad

is this the Rangsit U sports grounds again

yeah, looks like it

oh god I hate jealousy as a plot device but urgh

okay at least they did not make the banana eating weird

Mawkkkk don't bring down his hopes--

ah

okay, that's more like it

what's UP here

I love these two together

I mean I especially love Phawjai

but they're so good as friends

you're making her point, dude

this is CUTE and I wonder what's gonna be the nail in the coffin for Day to choose Mawk over August

Hi Night, long time no see!

August is TRYING, huh

birthday coming up, huh

I want Chef Mon's hair

oh, are we getting Night backstory, huh

!!!! HE QUIT

he loves his little brother and it's hard for him that Day hates him, that's my read and I'm sticking to it

this seems like they filmed this early on, idk

leaving it to himmmm

I love that it's not that easy to answer and that they can just leave it at that

Day kicking his feet like a little kid!!!

Mawk FLIRTING

DAY FLIRTING BACK

I cannottttt

is he gonna ---------

no mention of the necklace, huh

OH he's putting his own cologne on him????

holy SHIT that's intimate idk also I need to find that scent

(P'Aof and scents is2g)

I LOVE that they're not being coy about the, whatever it is between them

AUGUST PLANNED THIS on one hand: this is so cute!!! on the other hand: YIKES SURPRISE PARTIES

so that's why August took Mawk to buy drinks

so we'll have, what, 1-2 more eps of AugustDay and then a  crisis and then MawkDay? aaah

August and that condescending little shoulder slap, WOW

but I want that cake kinda

he's gonna bum a cig-- yep

also how tall is that dude to make Jimmy look short

the cig in the cake, oh man Mawk. I get that you're mad, but that's nasty

he's heartbrokennnn and I bet the social status thing plays into it too

I'm not sure I get what's going on rn--

I love how they show anxiety rising here, it's beautifully done

that's like a "putting your name on things to show they're yours' thing and it's not cute august

preview has me super afraid that we're going to get a kiss out of them next part

I love Gee

love the way they have Day made up here, he really looks like someone coming off a BAD moment or five

the bridgeeee

Mawk is like 'what was I thinking', huh

Day's already fallen for Mawk, he's just catching up to that reality now, huh?

oh August isn't bad at looking smitten, either

not on Mawk's level yet, but that's okay

(Ohm is doing really well for a junior actor)

oh????

CALLED IT

holy shit

oh wow what TIMING, of course

of course

poor Mawk, he's so unlucky with his sunflower timing every time

JimmySea fans everywhere throwing a shit

and Jimmy this is probably the weakest acting I've seen out of you so far

what the fuck why did you push him??? what the??????

was that a pity thing???

oh August, you fucker, the road to hell etc

did Day hear that???

asdfasdfasdfadsfasdfasdasdf adfadfasdfasdfasdfasdfasd oh DEAR

oh man Jimmy is MUCH better at being scary than at being kind

oh I unexpectedly love this??? y'know?

Mawk is Day's safe space atm, I love that.

what a terrible ending to a nice Birthday, huh

is this the early morning?? looks like it

ROOFTOP

kiss?????????

I feel like this is not the time?

that's … gonna backfire

tiny "mai" incoming?

no?

okay but Day is kissing back, huh?

Jimmy's eating

oh his voice went low there

but okay this is gonna get awkward I BET

OH we're going to get the "proving yourself / your love" arc in ep 7, huh. P'AOF!!!!

[iantimony]

oopsie, two missed tuesdays!

and i almost missed this one too!!!! i was moving apartments. ough. this is a random mishmash of everything i remember of the past .. three ?? ??? weeks.

listening: finished s1 of the silt verses! faulkner is my poor little meow meow etc. i am rotating it in my brain. will have more thoughts next week probably.

some fugazi because they were referenced in a mina le video on merch and i was intrigued. they're good!

fugazi waiting room

brat charli xcx on recommendation of beloved mutual png jpeg. i liked it, i don't normally go for her style but there's some good earworms in here. really good gym album. not sure which specific song to drop here because it was a Full Album experience imo.

in terms of relistening/older stuff, the dear hunter antimai, more franz ferdinand. finally listened to sound & fury by sturgill simpson all the way through, it's really good. boyf also got me to listen to die antwoord and ohhh i do like this. a lot.

i fink u freeky (die antwoord)

also more bionicle playlist. it's just a dose of early 00's-10's music delivered via iv directly into my bloodstream. sorry.

reading: this was from a few weeks ago actually but i forgot about it. we stopped over in pittsburgh for a night and briefly entertained the idea of going to a museum or something road-trip style and found this museum review. surprisingly she is not a lesbian.

and then related to the watching, wikipedia pages for victor ninov and darleane c hoffman!

watching: mina le: the merch industry has gone too far, WAGs, blokecore, and the “feminization” of sports

swell entertainment: the marketability of celebrity eras, how to destroy your audience's trust

started dangelo wallace's ozempic video. the fatphobia had me tapping out pretty quick tho. also watched about half of joy achill's "the george r r martin problem" about asoiaf stuff, gonna finish it tomorrow i think

watched "the man who tried to fake an element" with the boyf, really fascinating, i knew a little bit of it from one of my undergrad classes but this was a really good deep dive.

also watched two episodes of space dandy with the boyf. so much to unpack there.

playing: more dnd but otherwise fallow. made a little dungeon crawl type thing so that's pretty straightforward.

making: coasters mostly right now! the main ones are a Surprise so i will not be posting them yet. instead look at my worm

i've also started knitting a magic the gathering card sleeve as a semi-gag gift for a friend. it's really really stupid i love it so much. it is just ten rows of a rectangle in stockinette right now but i'm going to mock up a little texture work to get the swamp land symbol in the back.

eating: did a lot of takeout right after moving because, Yeah, but i finally started settling back in to home cooked meals. made my favorite orzo salad for a temple potluck, an ungodly amount of gyudon, and a garlic butter shrimp pasta thing.

misc: my new apartment is good!! the insulation isn't great, i know i'll have to shrinkwrap some windows this winter for Sure, but overall i'm settling in. i have a lot of organization and purging to do, especially of my House Clothes, craft supplies, and makeup/beauty shit, and i need to get one or two pieces of furniture still (like a couch......i have a funny little bachelor chair in front of the couch right now which is very funny). i got myself some fun plants from the farmers market as a housewarming gift to myself. i am finally the owner of a monstera, yippee, she Really needs a repot though. i also got a hoya lisa because i liked the name and it was cute and cat friendly and i got a vaguely labia-adjacent succulent. i have so many little household Needs and Tasks (mat for in front of the sink! blackout curtains because i have to sleep with an eye mask right now because the blinds dont do shit! etc!) and also every grocery bill i do is like $100 because of getting kitchen essentials that will not run out any time soon but that i do need (white vinegar. aluminum foil. flour.) so everything is so expensive. this is a big wall of text. at least the spare mattress is out of my weird haunted hallway now <3 i'm very excited to start hanging up my art.

[goblins-riddles-or-frocks]

Hellsing Rewatch: Episode Three Thoughts

One | Two

I loooove Pip

My favorite thing about Hellsing is that Dracula the novel has canonically been published in it. How did that happen! Why! Did Van Helsing commission it?? Are they meant to be genuine entries of their journals as a found footage thing?

It’s really funny and appropriate that the Wild Geese are like lmao monsters?? But also if I was a mercenary taken to this shady ass mansion with its own barracks etc I’d just believe any insane shit

Rip Iscariot letter Not Bomb stamp, you will be missed

Integra and Alucard both having a taste for the ugliest possible hats

Maxwell is SO extra he’s crushing his own glasses! Sir you need those!!!

Andercard 💖💖💖💖💖 They’re so fucking insane I love them

Also does this museum have no security? Is no one like uh. They’re drawing guns here.

AGDHFHFHGF Alucard grumpily going back to bed, does that mean he was asked to accompany them to the museum or was he just being nosy?

It’s SO FUNNY how Maxwell is Anderson’s boss now, he’s practically his son

HDJFJFGHDD REMEMBER MAXWELL MAKING INTEGRA SAY PLEASE IN THE MANGA

Why does Maxwell sound so proud when he reveals that the Vatican helped the Nazis 🥲

It’s so so so funny that Major and Dok personally showed up to the museum to watch all this discussion go down and also WHY IS DOK BLOODY AND WHAT IS THAT OUTFIT

What does Alucard mean that only Millennium, Integra, AND HIM are crazy enough to enlist the undead as soldiers. Are we talking level zero or something else????

Also lol. lmao. Walter acting like he doesn’t remember Millennium

HOTEL TWINK HIIIIIIII

Alucard did NOT need to do that poor twink right that, he changed his fucking life. He will never be the same

I looooove the shot of Alucard walking into the hotel room with the rippling air around him

“With any luck they’ll not only dig their own graves but pay for the funeral as well” fucks tbh. It’s a really good line

The spirit of Harkonnen being like “Something terrible is about to happen” and it’s really just Alucard waking her up.

I love Alucard subtly correcting Seras saying “Good morning” with “Good evening” but also like idk taking the moment to respond politely despite being like “btw SWAT team here to kill us.” He also waited a REALLY long time to wake her tbh

I’m generally ambivalent to the gun spirit dream sequence shenanigans but the choice to have such a light silly scene before the absolute carnage that is the Rio hotel fight is such a good tonal shift.

Rio sequence my beloved 💖

I love the beat when Integra questions if Alucard is going to show any restraint or like moral qualms at all in the face of adversity and Walter reminds her that he’s a monster. It definitely has the tone of a conversation they’ve had before.

Alucard’s so mad at the soldier committing suicide like I WANT THAT OUT DAMNIT

He’s having such a meltdown!!

“This is just the way it is” is it tho 🤔

Oh no the Rio call. In front of Walter’s salad

I think the Rio call (where Alucard is doing all this grandstanding about being a monster with zero remorse and needling her about potentially not being up to making a tougher call) is actually really interesting after him reacting so strongly to the one soldier killing himself, and then seeming to lose his own resolve a little bit when he realizes he’s been so harsh to Seras.

Walter like “I’m only the butler… I an not engaging with this shit”

Elevator sequence 💖💖💖💖💖 It’s truly really good nonverbal storytelling

I love that Major monologues so much that no one’s even trying to talk to him, they know he’s just going to keep going.

“I’m called the Dandyman” and Alucard’s like. Did I ask.

“There’s absolutely no reasoning with you people” WHEN DID YOU TRY TO REASON WITH THEM

Pip 👏 gets 👏 shit 👏 done 👏

The show does such a good job establishing just how gross and disgusting Alucard is

Oof the arm scene 😬

The one panned out shot where Alucard’s drinking from Alhambra and his proportions are so fucked that he looks like an Adventure Time character

Alucard making Pip on the fucking hijacked helicopter with a gun to the pilot’s head while he monologues 😭😭

It’s so funny how seriously Dok takes everything whereas Major is just like “Hell yeah!! Mayhem!!!!”

Dok’s still bloody omg, it’s also all over his coat like front and back? Did he deliberately just splatter it for edgy aesthetic purposes?

I NEVER noticed that young Walter was placed with the Millennium characters in the end credits. It’s crazy that they have that so early lol

[nancypullen]

SPRING!

Spring has sprung and I've got an itchy trowel hand. I'm dying to get stated in the gardens. Raise your hand if you think I need at least one raised bed for herbs.

I chose those baseball players because it's also baseball season! Opening day is March 28th. Hit 'em where they ain't boys! Name that movie. Here's a hint.

If I sound chipper today, it's because I am. I HAVE A DAY OFF! Hallelujah! This job has become all-consuming and honestly, not fun. With spring in the air I'm longing for home and time spent playing in the dirt. The flower beds in the front of the house wave me off every morning and greet me every night - and I miss them!

Those gorgeous irises ae from Stoner Creek Elementary where I spent many years working. When a tornado wiped out the school some of my sweet teacher friends dug up and divided irises from the grounds. My dear pal, Dina, gifted me with several and they're thriving. The tulip bulbs were sent by my sister-in-law last December. I put them in the ground and, lo and behold, all 40 bloomed! Isn't it special when you can look at parts of your gardens and feel a rush of love for the people who made it possible? Double the pleasure. Our high today is just 47 and there's a chilly wind blowing, but the sun is bight and skies are blue. No complaints from me. I spent a little time cleaning up winter debris from the flower beds and making plans for what I'll grow this year. Every fall I swear I'm not planting sunflowers again, and every spring I come across seeds that I saved and I'm pulled right back in. Of course I'll plant them. They did really well on the east side of the house last summer, so that's where they'll go again. I surrounded them with zinnias for extra color (is there anything easier to grow than zinnias?) and the grandgirl liked making bouquets with them. I'll do that again. My Zepherine rose bush arrived last week and went into the ground, crossing my fingers that she'll really show off. Of course, this is her first year so I shouldn't expect too much. I shouldn't, but I will. I need to do a lot of things with my time off, but I have a feeling most of it will involve dirt. I'm okay with that. I just want to wear old t-shirts, make things grow, and feed the birds and squirrels. I've become an old swamp witch. There are worse ways to spend my time, right? I've got a roast in the crockpot, I'll roast some broccoli and mash some taters for dinner. We eat a lot of salmon and salads, generally avoiding red meat, but I thought the mister deserved a big hunk of cow meat tonight. He has been absolutely wonderful about keeping things tidy and making dinners. I know, I know women do invisible work for decades and no one ever applauds or thanks them. We're criticized when we don't do it all, but never thanked. Still, I appreciate that he's not leaving everything for me to do, so I will shower him with beef. I know it's been forever since I posted, and I really hate it. HATE it. I ask myself at the end of every nine hour day at the library why I'm doing this. I just wanted to volunteer somewhere and meet some nice people.

I know that most folks don't see what happens behind the scenes in a library, it seems like quiet people just sit at desks and check books in and out. There's constant work to be done, lots of big plastic tubs of books coming and going that have to be processed, inter-library loans,etc. I also spend time at the information desk which is always wild. Some of the questions that people call with would blow your mind. I enjoy working in the children's room, that's always fun. I really love when I can put the right book into a kid's hands and they come back and ask for more like it. Shelving never ends...ever. I'm already working on April's displays , two in the main library and one in the children's room. I just really wish that the days weren't so long. This week is a short week for me and I am delighted. Next week will be long. If they'd just have me come in from 9 to 1 daily, I could knock out all of my work plus others' tasks and still have a life. I work every hour that I'm there, others do not. If I have down time I will float around and pick up the slack in other areas. If everything is caught up, I'll clean. I never thought I'd be that senior citizen that complained about "young people today", but my gosh there's a whole lot of dead weight on staff. Seems like everyone has a special reason why they can't complete a task or show up for work. Ugh. They're all making more than me and getting health insurance, why am I the only one worried about the work getting done? I'm the part-time granny! Okay, I'm not going to end this happy blog post with whining about work. It has been good for me to get out and meet people, I'll stick with the positives. I skipped lunch today because I was working in the yard and now I'm feeling snacky. Since we're having a big dinner I guess I'll just have some cucumbers or a cup of yogurt. That'll keep me from wasting away to normal. Might even sit down and watch some murder tv. I've really been missing my shows! I have to catch up on all of the heinous things people do to one another. I wouldn't be surprised if someone calls the library asking how to dispose of a body, I'll just consider this research. I'm off for a couple of days so I'll blog again tomorrow. Hooray!! I miss the old days of steady blogging. Until then... Stay safe, stay well, HAPPY SPRING! XOXO, Nancy

[fantomette22]

QUICK!! LET’S TALK ABOUT YOUR FIC CAINHURST OCS SO WE CAN INVITE THEM TO ME AND BIMBOM’S OC TEA PARTY AND WATCH THEM ALL FIGHT!!

OH OK Ok !!!

So i will keep it to my main fic « OCs »because if i add the 3 version of Maria family tree or smt it’s never gonna be over 😂

Potential lil spoilers for my fic too ahah (but I didn’t put any big spoils!) Also some are complete Ocs but other are based on the portrait or even fit in the lore and could be more of an oc with a prompt /interpretation. And funny things to note but literally more than half of my bloodborne ocs are from Cainhurst 😂

Ok let’s begin with Vledemyr!

The young newest addition to the royal guard. Maria & Annalise cousin & friend, future head of the royal guard of Annalise (and one of the most powerful vileblood one day). In my notes I said he is 4y older than Maria and 1y older than Annalise. That guy is like the mvp of cainhurst. Best inhabitant of Cain after Maria probably. I already talk about him I think ( I love him so much). Ok he would do anything for Annalise yeah but Maria too. Always here to watch over her like an older brother. He’s a bit overprotective of the girls when they were young yeah. Really a great support character, the ideal knight ! He’s not annoying like the rest of the typical cainhurst nobles too. His only default is maybe to be too loyal and obey order without contradicted them. Oh and he’s the one who take care of the crows & raven of the castle. (He’s the best that’s why you need to know)

Lady Sveta/ Svetta smt (kinda place holder name)

she’s a young noble lady from Cainhurst, similar age to Annalise and a close friend of her, Vledemyr, Maria etc She’s a calm & thoughtful lady who managed to become quite influential over the years at Cainhurst despite her young age. She’s not a knight but like most aristocratic cainhurst ladies she was taught how to weld a dagger at least. (Vled taught her quite a few extra tips too!)

Charles : What can I tell about him without telling too much🤔 He’s Maria, Annalise & Vledemyr childhood friend. His family don’t live at Cainhurst anymore and he’s not a super high class noble. The executioner gloves came from his family yep. He was a students at Byrgenwerth too. He begin his course 1y before Maria (1 year older). As a kid the 2 were really the inseparable little trouble makers of Cainhurst 😂 He grew more mature since but could cause troubles if he wish XD (a bit like Laurence, when told them NO and they say YES.) Yeah he’s a lil bastard basically but I love him.

He hope one to impress the noble from Cainhurst and have an important place one day. And you know help restore the great strength Cainhurst lost over time (it’s the shadow of it’s former glory)

He could have quite a decisive role at some point…

Richard, he’s the precedent king consort of cainhurst and Annalise’s father. Poor guy, so much stuff is going on in front of his salad and he can’t do anything about it xD. Yeah he’s not really the one in charge the old ladies of their council don’t even consult him every time ;-; but he’s trying his best and dream of a day where Cainhurst would be xxx again! Of course he’s not perfect but he tried. For exemple he’s really compatissant with Maria wanting to go study far from cainhurst and travel when she’s supposed to become a royal guard. And he prepared Annalise as best as he could and preferred to take pressure on himself than on his dear daughter. Still, sometimes (bc it’s his right) he’s wearing one of the most precious tresor of cainhurst. One of the crown of illusion. Said to diccipe & create illusion in the ancient times. The 2nd crown was lost century ago far into the plumerias labyrinth and all it’s just a normal crown now. All it’s mystic power seems to have disappear long ago…

Well there’s the late queen I guess. (Don’t have a name yet sorry) she was loved by her subject and yeah typical queen too. She was actually the one to try to begin expedition to pthumerians underground again. After decades/centuries of nothing because cainhurst was to salty at the war their loose against their cousins

The ex body guard of the queen (I don’t have a name yet 😐). Will be relevant at some point… He was originally a mercenary hiring by Cainhurst to go to Loran. One of the only person who came back and they made him knight for his exploit. He even become the Queen’s personal bodyguard. He mysteriously disappeared some times after the Queen passed away…

The Royal guard captain? Or at least one of the head of the knights (when Maria was a student at Byrgenwerth). He’s an asshole. Other instructors are much sympthetic but this guy omg… you will understand when the time come. He’s really strict, almost abusive and doesn’t support when you contradict him or try to insult him to his face 😬

3 squires : future royal guards in training about Maria’s age. The 4 of them are supposed to become the next royal guards & Annalise personal guard.

(Maria is on the right & Vledemyr supervise them. It’s a meme too xD)

There’s a young woman (chikage and Evelyn) and two young men, one really strong with 2 chikages and the other one wielding a reiterpallasch and an Evelyn)

I need names too. And I can’t tell you really much more for now.

The next 3 are inspired by a song my friend made.

Twins musician : 2 of the most incredible musicians of Cainhurst. They both can play a clavecin in sync for exemple. And really fast

The master of dance/maestro : He teach the young noble how to spar & dance. And is a bit crazy really XD he often wear a knight helmet with a black suit.

Oh I almost forgot but the chiefs cook ! They come from the same country as Yamamura. If you do shit with their food or tried to cook one of their signature dishes horribly they will fight you.

Then I guess there’s Maria’s close family & other relatives ? You know her parents, the other nobles (but not really ocs more like background character you know) and her annoying grand aunts… 🤣 « But Annalise you can’t stand grand aunt Suzanne either ! »

The birds (crows mostly), horses and dogs don’t count I guess rip 💔 (I’m looking for names too. Yes they are important and relevant background characters)

I know Bloody Crow is not an OC but does baby Bloody Crow (when he was a baby/kid/teens) aka Voron count ? 🥺 No? ok. All I will say for now is that Maria is his godmother.

Ok so Leo don’t count either I guess so not for today. I don’t think his half siblings : Lupin & sister count either XD they are not noble and from Hemwick so (also in the family of my dear hunter)

There’s one last cainhurst oc I have… I think… but hm i can’t really talk about it (a lil secret kinda) I will only say that this oc was a young and sweet little girl who loved flowers and her family. She is deeply missed.

Anyway can’t wait see a hell of a typical Cainhurst duel on the table 👀 oh I mean tea party sorry x)

[psychologeek]

The Long Road.

Feel free to share. Based on true stories.

Tw: wounds, terror, death and possible death, implied sexual assault, etc. - lmk if I missed anything)

Party (The Long Road)

You just turned 18, and your sister wants to PARTY. It's common - she's the wilder one, and you are more shy. But you love each other, so sometimes she stays home with you and sometimes you go out with her.

Her boyfriend got the three of you tickets for this awesome party. It's a peace rave, and you're gonna PARTY till dawn. You get a drink, or two, and maybe smoke a joint (or two).

(It's peaceful and beauty. You are with your twin and you are whole).

There's this guy there, and he starts flirting with you. Your sister go to make out with her BF, whispering: "go get him, tiger!"

You are nervous af and not really sure, but hopefully he liked you?

He did ask for your number, so. Maybe?

He's cute, and you talk for almost an hour before his friends called him.

(You gave him your number, obviously. )

Your sister is high and you are used to the way she and her boyfriend are, but- ew.

Right in front of your salad?

You sit on the ground and watch the beautiful sunrise, as the sky slowly turn red and the it's getting lighter.

There's loud noises, but it's common here so. You're not really worried. You just look for your sister to make sure she's still around and didn't leave you behind to do the deed.

(Again)

There's a loud BOOM, and you realise the rockets are in the area. You scan harder for your sister as you run for non-existing shelter.

There's a sound of firearms shooting from somewhere and everything is blurry and you can't breathe and you can't find anyone you know and-

Someone grabs you by the arm, and you scream.

"Shush!" Your sister hiss. "Don't be such a scary can't, gosh". She's high, and her hair is all messed up but her boyfriend is nowhere to be seen. She notices your searching look.

"He's starting the car. I went looking for you," she roll her eyes. "Someone gotta make sure you're okay, right? I'm your older sister. ".

"By EIGHT MINUTES," you mumble.

(But you don't feel like fighting over it as usual. You can see your sister's scared, and so are you. You have no idea what's happening).

You keep running towards the vehicles, and there are screams you don't understand.

(You don't look aside. You step on something red and sticky but you DON'T LOOK DOWN).

There's a couple running towards you. He's wounded, and she's holding his shoulder.

"Don't go right," they whisper in horror. "They are shooting there".

You hold your sister's hand tight as you keep running. You don't know where, but you run. Your sister's by your side, and you try to focus on breathing and not crying.

Your sister fall, and you try to help her up when the shooting gets closer. You fall by her, holding her like you did in the womb, and pray they won't see you.

(You can hear someone screaming. There's a short fire and then silence.

You hear a girl screaming, begging, "no! Please, don't!" And you don't know which is worse).

Your sister sob into your shoulder, and you put your hands on her back, pushing her into you, trying to mute the noise.

(Your fucking brain can't stop thinking about how and when will your parents hear about it, since they don't use the phone on Shabbat. You wonder if you'll die first, and you don't know if you wish for that or not).

There's silence around, and you wait, listen carefully, as you think about keep running.

But your sister won't get up.

"I'm sorry I dragged you here," she cries. "It's my fault.just go. Leave."

But she is your sister. Your twin. Your other half.

You won't leave her behind.

She slowly stands up and you realise her leg is bleeding. She was shot, and you don't dare looking.

You have no water or food and your sister need assistance to walk. But you keep moving.

(You carry your sister, and you look at the road. At one point you see the man who screamed before, and you tell your sister: "Don't look at the road").

You walk. You don't know for how long or how far, but you walk.

There's a sudden noise behind, and you throw your sister to the side of the road and throw yourself on her body. It's a car, and the driver sees you and you get ready to die.

(You're already covered by your sister's blood).

He stop by you and you kiss your sister for the last time.

Then the car stops, and you hear

"Fuck fuck fuck be alive please be alive oh my god."

(He speaks your language).

"Hi, hi, can you walk? You alive?"

You get up, and it's the guy from the party.

"Holly shit, I thought we were dead," you almost cry.

But your sister is pale and you get inside the car and the guy get out one of those lame first aid kits, but it has something to tie around her leg and you're covered with blood and pain and you think to yourself and your sister-

"We can make it. We'll survive."

You don't look out of the window. You don't look at the road. You look at your living sister, drinking an old bottle of water probably left in the car for week but WHO FUCKING CARES you're out!

And then the shooting starts again. The guy from the party start driving in a zig zag pattern trying to avoid it. (you realise you can't even remember his name, which is rediculus consider it all.)

You're flying, and moving, and-

When you wake up, you're on disoriented and stare right at red window, confused, thinking

"Wait, something feels off".

Your sister keep her hand on your mouth, and you can see her mouth

"They're coming. Play dead."

And then there's shouting and noise outside and your head's aching and your sister look dead and you don't know if it's acting or-

Or-

(It's acting. You decide it's acting.)

And you try to stay quiet and play dead, but there's a loud noise and you move and they see you and say something and you don't get it and-

Someone's got a knife and there's a gun aimed at you and-

Someone tear out your seat belt and -

They look around, dismiss your sister and-

(They aren't dead. They can't be.)

They pull you out and take you by force, put you on a motorcycle.

(It's hurt. You're scared. You want your sister. You want your mom. )

You don't know what's coming, but as they take you you look back at the road.

You think about the young man you saw, and the woman you didn't.

You think about an old story, warning to never look back.

You still does.

[kindheart525]

Ginger Root was assigned to the bride of the Princess for a few reasons, but mostly because she was one of the only ponies who could speak Saddle Arabian. They had servants who spoke Yakistani, Draconic, Seaponish, etc. 

She tried to not think about trivial matters like that too much, but her mind tended to wander when she was nervous. 

Even though she could speak it she was asked to not let Sahar do so. Supposedly she "needed to learn Equish fluently, upside, and backwards" if she was going to be royalty successfully. Ginger felt pretty badly about it though. 

"Today is table ettiquette day, so we're heading to the dining room. It’ll just be the two of us!"

She told Sahar as they arrived, keeping vigilant to, at the very least, help her out if she didn't understand something.

“Etiquette we have too, in Saddle Arabia!”

Sahar had been nervous and quiet since the wedding, struggling to cope with the culture shock she was experiencing in her new home. But similarities between Saddle Arabia and Equestria brought her some comfort, so she perked up at the reminder of her homeland.

Ginger returned her smile politely as she spoke, something in her heart wrenching when she had to correct her excitement. 

"We have etiquette in Saddle Arabia as well, Princess. Don't worry about that though. Come sit down!" 

She lead the mare to the table where there was a plate along with way too much cutlery. The wine glass was full and there was bread on a dish, along with some indiscernable mystery food that was made to look fancy. 

"Sit down for me and pick up the dinner fork."

Sahar sat in her seat and looked down at the table set with confusion. There were three forks here! Not to mention multiples of all the other cutlery. She’d already forgotten what each one was for from the last lesson, but how could anypony remember which was which? It was much too complicated.

She picked one up sheepishly.

“This is the dinner fork?”

To be entirely honest, Ginger didn't know which fork was which either. 

She had to study half the night just to make sure she could help properly herself! She picked up the right fork and showed it to Sahar, her mouth moving up and down with no words as she struggled to figure out what exactly to do. 

After a few moments she sighed deeply, putting down the fork and deciding that she wasn't going to sit here and torture the mare twofold. So she began speaking in the language Sahar knew best. 

"Nopony uses these old rules anymore except for the royals at really important events, but with Her Majesty that happens quite a bit around here-" 

Referring to the one Sahar was married to. 

"-I know it’s frustrating but you have to memorize it. This is the salad fork and this is the dessert fork, they have four tines while the dinner fork has one. If you learn that you'll do well. Try again."

It was like a dam broke when Sahar heard her own language being spoken to her, she couldn’t hold back her feelings anymore. A sob escaped her as she replied.

“I have been trying! Over and over again! I cannot get it right, no matter what I do!”

She slumped down onto the table, with enough force to topple the wine glass in front of her.

“And Heavenly is no help at all! She is so cold, like she hardly cares! You are the only one who truly does.”

The tears stung Ginger’s heart almost as deeply as they seemed to sting Sahar. She was so engrossed in listening to Sahar that she didn't even notice the spilled wine for a few good minutes. 

"It's not you, Your Majesty! Trust me-" 

She leaned in close to whisper, her voice shaking as she struggled to sound cheerful. She knew how much this must hurt and she wasn't going to make matters worse by being anxious. 

"-I know how cold Her Majesty can be. I'm here for you. I mean, it’s literally my job, but I'm here for you, for more than just mare-waiting stuff. How about we say you got it all right and do something you want?" 

Ginger perked up as she riskily used her hooves to lift Sahar's head, giving her a beaming smile.

"How does that sound?"

Sahar smiled through her tears, feeling more reassured than she had in a long time.

“That sounds wonderful. You truly are a bright spot in my life...”

A new nickname came to her mind for Ginger, a name from her homeland.

“My dear friend, Diya.”

~~~~~~~~~~

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