#real clown hours tho

[artificialcaretaker]

I was pretend-seething over being invested in the monkey movie my brother took me to watch with him but I’m not even pretend-seething because it’s monkeys I’m pretend-seething because if we both enjoy the same thing then I can’t call him a loser over it because that would make ME a loser.

Stop having a somewhat acceptable taste in movies (I am infinitely grateful that even in your edgelord “rebellious” phase you still want to hang out with me) bitch.

[thecherrygod]

Hm

[oh-no-its-bird]

Fic where, in practicing to get edo tensei right, Orochimaru uses Izuna as a test subject and tries to substitute DNA to make it work, using Suigetsu's bc like it's extra flexible or whatever bc shape change

Edo tensei mermaid Izuna locked in a tube somewhere in Oro's lab,,

He's SO mad about it and has literally no information ab what's going on at all bc hes locked in a fucking tube !!

Bonus points if Orochimaru doesn't even specifically know who he is

They unearthed him w the rest of the founders on a whim but bc no one really requested him specifically, the body just kinda sat there and eventually got mixed in w the rest of the Uchiha corpses, till Orochimaru requests an Uchiha corpse and they shrug and send him over

He still has Madara's eyes too (left alone either by oversight / or bc they decided not to pull them before he got mixed in w the other bodies, who had by then already gotten scooped of their eyes so they assumed he'd already been harvested)

Ok but like. No one even tells him what happened/where he is/that madara made the village. Why would anyone?? The only one Izuna sees regularly is Orochimaru, and he doesn't know those facts would matter??

Izuna doesn't even know what Konoha IS, he isn't gonna recognize the name

From Izuna's perspective, he died in his bed and then BOOM. Tank time.

Orochimaru might tell him it's been some years since his death (thinking he died in the massacre) and even if Izuna doesn't believe him bc like, enemy, enemy territory, he sure as fuck probably won't be thinking "Ah yes it's been decades since my death and my brother went against my dying wishes to make that village"

Tho he might get nervous and start picking up those cues when he sees the tech

Oro mentions offhand that the Uchiha were all killed and Izuna immediatley assumes the Senju won the war and loses it

He'd figure it out eventually obviously (probably after being set free, most likley by Sasuke w Suigetsu) But he'd also probably keep that to himself, bc like, enemy territory n stuff

Mermaid shapeshifter Izuna terrorizes the shinobi world,, Sasuke doesn't know what he just unleashed.

Ok actually but like. Suigetsu's shape-shifting but bc Izuna has a fire chalra nature, make it liquid fire shape-shifting. Fuckin, fire mermaid Izuna. He has an awful time retaining his form and actually for the first chunk of time, him being in that tube is genuinley just for the best. He keeps turning into liquid fire with no real solid body and can't put himself back together for hours.

Izuna hears his brother is still alive and running Akatsuki and is so down to clown till he realizes THATS NOT HIS FUCKING BROTHER HOW DARE YOU USE HIS NAME

Anyways oh my god Izuna on team Taka,,

He and Sasuke would be SUCH a dynamic actually, they look alike so much?? Sasuke doesn't recognize him but he's clearly a close relation, so there's some mystery there. Sasuke is like super shaken by finding a member of his clan and Izuna, by that point aware that apparently the rest of his clan is dead, is sticking to him like GLUE. Sasuke is bitchy little brother coded and Izuna understands this is probably karma bc he is also bitchy little brother coded

They probably clash a lot, especially bc both are expecting to be in charge here, but ultimately I think they'd get along better than Sasuke does most people, and there's also that bonus vulnerability of like. Izuna is an older Uchiha boy who's trying to brother him (with a noticeably different brother-ing style to Itachi too) and Sasuke has been alone for so, so long.

Sasuke accidentally calls him nii-san then promptly has several break downs about it

Suigetsu and Izuna either get along ALARMINGLY well or they hate eachother. I think I wanna go with the first bc it sounds more fun. They couldn't talk to eachother in the tanks but they could still see eachother, so maybe they kind of developed some sort of code to communicate?

They are "cause problems on purpose" friends. They're also "wdym I can't kill him???" *looks of genuine confusion* buddies. They're giving Sasuke the biggest headache actually, someone stop them. If you leave them to "take care" of a problem, there will be carnage.

Also, like, Izuna literally has Suigetsu's DNA in him. That's a thing.

Mmm maybe some complex thoughts ab how Izuna has effectively become a bloodline thief against his will (the ULTIMATE taboo for shinobi from his era) and he's like, actually fucked up about it.

Running joke where they refer to each other as cousins, could be funny. They argue over who's the bastard child (it's Izuna obviously but he won't just take that title lying down)

Izuna is like, in his 20s, and Karin is around 16 or 17 at this time I think?? She definatley has a bit of a crush on him (which helps take the edge off Sasuke) but like, he's not acknowledging that beyond patting her on the head. She'll get over it eventually. (Sasuke hides behind Izuna when Karin is trying to flirt w him and Izuna absoloutley laughs at them both)

Izuna is actually really impressed w Karin's sensing abilities specifically. I think he'd be a bit on edge around her at first, bc Uzumaki -> Senju ally. But he'd quickly assume she's a deserter (he has no idea the Uzumaki are pretty much wiped out rip) and becomes cautiously chill after a minute or two (also when he first escapes, he REALLY doesn't have the luxury to pick and choose his allies. He's instantly attached to Sasuke and cautiously fond of Suigetsu, and Karin seems to have Sasuke's trust at least, so he'll keep an eye on it but otherwise trust Sasuke's judgment)

Izuna and Karin besties arc where they paint eachothers nails is a must. I love the take that Izuna is really into fashion n stuff and he and Karin should like, trade hair tips or smthn. Karin knows modern soap brands where as Izuna bought his soaps from clan vendors who no longer fucking exist, so like, it's definatley helpful.

Karin is the only one of them to have any real hint of where tf Izuna came from (tho even she doesn't have the full details) it'd be cool if she was the one to figure out more details ab his general mystery— maybe something about her chakra sensing gives her a hint as to how old he really is?? Or she finds the paper trail that hints towards the bodies being mixed up???? Idk but she deserves to have an "aha!" moment

Also Izuna's medical knowledge/standards are NOT up to modern and Karin is so mad about it, she's giving him hella lessons on first aid n shit and he's very, very interested in all this free medical knowledge

I know the least about Jugo so bear with me on this one pls— I think Izuna would find Jugo to be pretty fascinating as a person actually. He enjoys tentatively poking him with sticks, and comes to genuinley like him as a person (when he's calm) pretty quickly

Also cats love Izuna so he gets bonus points from Jugo bc of that, they can bond while petting Izuna's contracted cats or smthn idk

Yeah I really don't know much ab Jugo so that's all I have to offer sorry

Ok let's backtrack a bit, back to Orochimaru ->

Fun scene towards the very start of the fic, where Izuna still has no fucking clue what's going on, but recognizes Orochimaru as a member of the Orochi clan. He says as much, and Orochimaru has to pause.

No one's mentioned his clan to him in years. They haven't been relevant in Konoha since Orochimaru was born— even before that, they were barley relevant. Izuna should not know who they are.

(The only reason he does know is bc they had a neutral to positive relationship w the Uchiha back in the warring era, and Izuna had visited them once before)

Immediatley, Orochimaru is squinting at this guy. He's giving Danzo a ring asking who exactly he got sent over, but Danzo doesn't actually have anything to offer him??? The paperwork is a mess and there were a LOT of Uchiha. He's not registered as a shinobi tho.

Hmmmm.... ok.

Orochimaru is suddenly aware there's some kind of mystery here now, which is dangerous for Izuna. Izuna is, again, in enemy territory, and he's able to pick up on the fact that Orochimaru doesn't actually know who he is. This ofc means that HE sure as hell won't be telling him.

Maybe he bares his teeth and sarcastically says he's the second coming of Uchiha Madara (not even that big of a lie when u think ab it)

Pivoting time ->

Izuna is listed in the data books as like, being equally as talented as Madara and I think we should talk ab that more actually

I love Tobirama but he really did get him by surprise

Izuna just got cocky and taken by surprise!!

HE DIDNT EVEN GET COCKY HE JUST LOGICALLY DIDNT EXPECT TOBIRAMA TO FUCKING INVENT TELEPORTATION

Then he went down in the history books both in canon and out of it as the weakest of the 4, that's so tragic

Izuna gets mermaid edo tenseid and (once people know who he is) everyone is like "Ok well at least he's uhh. The weakest of the 4 right?? I mean tobirama killed him when they were like only 19/20 so we'll probably be fine???"

Then he just fucking bodies them all bc hes a nightmare actually AND on whatever special test trial edo tensei steroids they gave him

Izuna is fueled on rage and spite and he's full up on both

Imagine he gets the full story of everything that happened while he was dead too, like.

Ok so Madara goes against his EXPRESS dying wishes and makes his village. (what the fuck!!) Then backs out (yay!!) but in an awful way that effectively fucks over the entire clan for years to come (nii-san what the FUCK)

Then gets literally backstabbed by Hashirama (HE FUCKING TOLD YOU!!! WHAT DID HE FUCKING SAY!!!!!)

Then the Uchiha seem to thrive and like. Ok. He's still mad about it, but at least something... kind of nice came out of it.

THEN BOTH THE VILLAGE AND MADARA'S(?????) SCHEMES KILL THEIR ENTIRE CLAN

Izuna is SO mad at literally everyone, holy shit. The only one safe from his rage is Hikaku, god rest his poor, poor soul

Actually, I think it'd be funny if Izuna was like, indescribably extra awful mad at everyone— but then is like. Normal mad amounts at Tobirama, who was a bitch but at least didn't seem to carry on a personal fucking vendetta against the Uchiha like EVERYONE ELSE INCLUDING FUCKING MADARA FOR SOME GODDAMN REASON

Izuna is going like, "FUCK you, FUCK you, OH, EXTRA FUCK YOU—" then squints at Tobirama and goes "...fuck you." Then goes back to screaming

To be clear, Tobirama absolutely contributed to the end of the Uchiha, but like. A) it'd be funny, and B) at least his seemed slightly less on purpose than literally everyone else

There's also I think a difference of like. Izuna never expected Tobirama to suddenly turn around and be pro Uchiha

Where as everyone else (again, including his brother!!) Was like. A genuine betrayal

Tobirama fucking over the clan was never a surprise

He never pretended to be on their side (like Hashirama lowkey did)

Tobirama vs Izuna but it's them getting to relive their rivalry where as Izuna vs literally anyone else is emotionally charged as hell and filled with demented screaming

Leaving it there for now, I might actually try to write this one but who tf knows

[lily-alphonse]

For the rare pair challenge: my favorite one is Sam/Alex!

unfffff I love this one how HOT would that be 🥵

My brain is scrambled tho because I have shipped them both with Sebastian as the openly gay one to even out the dynamic. I interpret Alex as closeted and Sam as bi/pan but skewing more towards women. Like he's not opposed to getting with a guy if he liked them but hasn't really thought about it kind of thing.

So how would they end up getting together?

Ok, I think I want Alex to be coming back from college. He lost his sports scholarship due to bad grades and was forced to come home, leaving his secret fling in the city at the same time. He's heartbroken, he's dejected, he's wallowing.

A couple of weeks after coming back, Haley decides she's had enough of his moping and they are going to a bar in the little town nearby to see some people from their high school perform. They're in a band now, and getting some minor success playing gigs at local venues.

Alex is totally plastered by the time Goblin Destroyer comes on stage. That must be why time slows when he sees Sam. Why his smile makes him feel warm and his heart race.

"Holy shit," he murmurs to himself. The scrawny class clown he knew in high school looks so different.

Haley eyes him knowingly. "No. Nuhuh. Not him. When I said we were getting you laid tonight I didn't mean one of the few people from Pelican Town!"

"But he's gotten SO hot."

"He's got a mullet, Lexie."

"Mullets can be hot," he pouts.

And then they begin their set, and Alex is certain he must be drunk as hell because he doesn't even like this kind of music but he's dancing along to it and having the best time. He's amazed that Sam can play the guitar and sing at the same time. He's amazed by Sam's voice, the rasp in it seriously fucking with his inhibition. And even when he stops singing, and just shreds a guitar solo, Alex is still awe-struck.

They hadn't been sure they would stay for the whole performance, but then Alex is cheering along with the crowd after their final song, cheeks flushed with exertion and heart racing.

He hasn't thought about his ex in hours. He hasn't thought about how royally fucked up his life is. And he doesn't want it to end. But Sam disappears.

Suddenly the crowd is too stifling. He needs to get outside. He needs to breathe. Haley seems to be having the time of her life pressed up against a wall with a man she met fifteen minutes ago. Alex texts her that he will be outside, and pushes his way to the exit.

It's cold, instant relief. It's quiet too, just a group of smokers chatting in the parking lot. He turns to walk the opposite direction from them, when someone bumps into him.

"Alex?"

Sam.

Teehee this is my most cliffhanger one yet I was really getting into that one. I might actually write it for real. If you'd be interested in being tagged if/when I post the fic, reblog or comment letting me know! (What are we naming this ship??)

Send me any Stardew Valley rarepair and I will tell you how I would make them work! (Even non-marriage npcs) If youre lucky you may get a mini fic out of it. Check the list below to see if Ive already answered yours

Rarepair Masterlist

[rapha-reads]

Things from Interview With The Vampire s02e04 (ep11) I noticed:

[Edit 1: Actually this turned into a live-commenting, sorry]

[Edit 2: Keep in mind, I haven't read the books, so all of these observations are born from the show itself and the few (lots of) spoilers and narrative plot points I've gleaned here and there.]

Both Claudia and Louis are so bored with the coven. Or maybe bored isn't the word, but... Done? Frustrated and annoyed? Restless? Louis because he never intended to join and so cares not all for all their internal affairs. Claudia because she thought she'd finally have the life she wanted and instead is being forced to relive the tragedy of her life day after day.

And Armand rejoices in drawing them further apart, scolding and punishing Claudia while begging scraps from Louis.

And he's soooo jealous. The face he makes when Louis starts explaining what Dreamstat feels like is priceless.

Also, personal theory: either Louis is indeed suffering psychotic breaks after psychotic breaks, or just manifesting his own version of Lestat because he doesn't want to let go. Or Lestat can astral project and has been stalking Louis from the moment they left New Orleans.

The coven is tearing itself apart. And normally I'd add "and Armand isn't even seeing it/taking it seriously yet" but given that the whole of them are unreliable narrators and that Armand is a shady ass bitch whose only agenda is himself, I'd say he's well aware and purposefully making it worse.

I can't make sense of Santiago yet, though. Is he jealous? Ambitious? Is he fond of Claudia? Does he hate her? He definitely hates Louis, but is it just jealousy or real antipathy? Oh, but Louis is still my precious special kitten and that speech about Paris, art and modernity, as a contemporary culture student, made me vibrate a little out of my chair, and Santiago clowning him makes me want to claw his face. We get it, you hate him and you think he's pretentious, now can you shut up and let us talk a bit more about the art scene in Paris post-WW2 and why Louis is absolutely right, Picasso isn't all that impressive in the end? Thanks. Bacon tho, Bacon is interesting. My contemporary art teacher last year was excruciatingly boring, but he had a boner for both Louise Bourgeois and Bacon and we spent several hours on them (and not nearly enough about Mapplethorne, alas). Anyway. I feel ya, Lou. I have been called pretentious too for simply getting excited about art, culture and folkore.

I'm rooting for Louis and Claudia to kill them all off and run away to Italy. I know it won't happen, but one can dream, eh.

Is Armand messing up with both Daniel by getting into his mind and Louis by switching the photos? Interesting. Two people who have a shitton of issues stuck with a sadistic, insecure and bitter control freak who's been pulling the threads since way before anyone realises. And Louis is so lost in his trauma and grief and anger, he trusts Armand and doesn't see what's happening and been happening to him for 70 years, while Daniel is just a sad, sick old man who thinks he knows his life and what his future entails. Armand is definitely having fun.

"Je n'aime pas fenêtre quand fermée" is NOT FRENCH, MY EARS. I will be picky, I don't care for artistic licence. Correct sentence would be "je n'aime pas les fenêtres quand elles sont fermées". Admittedly, if it goes into a song, you'd have to respect the length of the line and all those musical measures. But still. You could shorten the numbers of syllables by dropping the language register: "j'aime pas les f'nêtres quand elles sont fermées" ; from 12 or 13 to 9, the original line being 8 or 9. Depending on whether you say "je-n'ai-me-pas" or "je-n'aim-pas" and "fe-nê-tres" or "fe-nêtres". Anyway. I'm sure the writers had those discussions (I hope; hey, AMC, hire me, I'm a good proofreader and I speak 5 languages).

Me: oh, Louis isn't even bothering now, he's directly talking to... Wait, is Lestat eating that photo? If it's Dreamstat: the hell is going on in your head, Louis? If it's Astral Lestat: that is certainly a choice, my friend.

"Barely Balthasar", LMAO, Lestat I fucking love you. Poor Balthasar always gets forgotten in adaptations. Nope, we're not here to talk R&J, moving on.

Armand: "this is my tragic backstory. Feel pity for me. I'm the good guy." Me: yeaaah, how much of this is actually real? And, uh, no, like Lestat said: ha! You're a storyteller and a conman, Armand. You weave your story to pluck at the heart's threads of your audience, modulating it to their sensibilities to better serve your own interests and your plans. What are those interests, these plans? Hell if I know. But I absolutely do not trust you at all.

HANDS OFF CLAUDIA OR I'LL BITE

"The wilderness that is our daughter" have I said lately how much I love Lestat.

Oh, hello, the Loustat scene on the bench just broke my heart, which is funny if you consider that that's just Louis breaking up with himself. Also, do we consider Louis knew about the initials in the pocket, and Dreamstat is saying what Louis wants him to say, or is it another unreliable narrator Louis, or is it Lestat himself...?

Aw, going from the Loumand scene on the bench to "toxic gay divorce with body count" sure is a tonal shift. Lmao. You're losing your touch, Armand. Louis' awakening. Daniel's awakening... San Francisco next, that will be fun. Excited to see how they've changed that part, knowing it's the red thread of the first book.

...

Oooh, that got long. Apologies. I really need to sit and read those books.

[bitterkarella]

Midnight Pals: Love on a Battlefield

Stephen King: guys did you hear there’s a  video game campfire too? Mary Shelley:  that sounds like some nerd shit King: no no there are lots of cool people there King: hideo kojima, sid meier, bob bates   King: the 2 guys from andromeda Shelley: [cracking knuckles in anticipation]

Hideo Kojima: IN THE YEAR OF OUR LORD 19XX, MERCENERY GASEOUS SNAKE IS BROUGHT OUT OF RETIREMENT TO FIGHT THE REMNANTS OF THE WOLFDOG UNIT... Kojima: INCLUDING... Kojima: ROPE CHOKER, POISON EATER, TORPEDO LAUNCHER , AXE GRINDER, BOMB DETONATOR, AND DIPPY DOG

Kojima: do you think that love can bloom on a battlefield? Kojima: Kojima: yes... Kojima: even on a battlefield... Ken Williams: hey my girlfriend roberta and I saw you from across the bar and we’re really digging your vibe Williams: Can we buy you a drink?

Kojima: the villainous traitor bad boy has kidnapped dr good scientist and forced him to help build the ultimate weapon of mass destruction... Kojima: the metal gear... Kojima: it’s like a tank... Kojima: but it can move... Kojima: Kojima: But wait... Kojima: not with treads... Kojima: with legs...

[at Midnight Society] Hideo Kojima: I have an idea for a new video game... Kojima: About you! Stephen King: oh wow a game about us? that sounds pretty ok! Poe: yeah I’d be curious about this Kojima: the game is called ‘the association of Fire Story friends’ Kojima: a hideo kojima game... Kojima: written by hideo kojima... Kojima: produced by hideo kojima... Kojima: directed by hideo kojima... Kojima: catering by hideo kojima...

 Kojima: The fire story friend association members names are... Kojima: Bird Scare.. Poe: Kojima: Clown daddy... King: Kojima: Knife Stabber... Mary Shelley: Kojima: Little Friend... Dean Koontz: Kojima: Cat Bitch... Clive Barker: Kojima: and Silly Racist... Lovecraft: Lovecraft: w-which one is me

Kojima: SUBMITTED FOR THE APPROVAL OF THE MIDNIGHT SOCIETY I CALL THIS THE TALE OF THE STORY FRIENDS... Kojima: IT IS A GAME WHERE THE GOAL IS NOT TO FIGHT... Mary Shelley: what the hell is this shit Thomas Disch: sh let him cook Disch: mr kojima in level 5 is there a way to escape the dungeon w/o the wizard‘s key? Shelley: shut UP nerd

Kojima: In this game, you play as clown daddy... Kojima: bird scare has given him an assignment... Kojima: he must tell a story without anyone hearing King: wow! incredible! King: hideo, once again you’ve redefined a genre!

Kojima: this story is also about how war is bad... King: whats the theme tho Kojima: Kojima: uh, its that war is bad... King: Koontz: Poe: Lovecraft: Barker: Kojima: perhaps this three hour cutscene will explain better...

Kojima: now this next story will be my last ever... Kojima: for real this time... King: aw really? Kojima: yes... King: King: really?

[accio-victuuri]

Weibo HS entries have been very fun today, lol omg. Sina Weibo is never on my good side but there are days like this that i am very amused. 😂😂😂

So earlier today, the entertainment hs was blowing up with Ren Min’s name because of her dating scandal. A paparazzi, released video evidence confirming that she is dating a director. So the top searches were all her name or that director, or both. I really don’t approve of celebrity’s relationships getting outed like this but what can you do. Then XZ gets into the mix, remember, She’s his co-star in Yuguyao / The longest promise. The reason why is kinda funny tho:

Their CP supertopic has changed their avatar into the words “fake” like what most accounts do when denying a rumor or melon, they stamp this word on it. It’s because of what came out, if RM is in a relationship, then their ship is not SZD. Which I think is not necessary, you can pair people up and continue to do so but not believe they are real. For example I love Dilraba and YY because of YAMG, but I don’t think they are SZD.

I’m not even mad when drama related CPs pop up or whatever co star the boys acted with. I mean, XZ & WYB started out like that too. It’s all good as long as they do not overstep and cause trouble and bad press for the boys. Poor XZ tho, suddenly getting dragged into this. Everyone should just focus on the 15 photos his studio released. It’s beautiful ♥️

NOW MOVING ON TO WANG YIBIS,

I already talked about the cpn implications of his photo today and meaning of the hashtag he used over here. The tag being 3rd on main HS, even tho if you look at the posts and the popular ones, WYB’s is the highest by a huge margin. So we know who gave traffic to that propaganda 😂 Please don’t use him for your rumors and to reach your KPIs, he will only work for free when it comes to the government’s projects.

On entertainment, he’s also there for other reasons, i’m capping it pretty late but it was much higher hours after he posted the photos. 📷

but my favorite is this one, which as of writing is not on the top 50 anymore. the initial post was that WYB’s photos were taken in Inner Mongolia. What’s hilarious are the comments 😂😂😂😂

everyone of the top comments are clarifying it’s because IM is a possible shooting location for Mermaid. what??? Why are they so defensive??? Can’t the account be saying that cause they wants fans to know where it is and maybe the fans can go and visit??? what are they clarifying for 👀

even a wyb fc account suddenly posted lol yet another “clarification”.

The lady (ies) doth protest too much, methinks.

It’s so obvious why they are saying this. Their CP alarm bells are ringing. I swear, these solos can deduce better than us. They saw our IM clowning so they decide to do this “damage control” lol. We know about Mermaid being potentially filmed in IM. We have been clowning since then so whatever explanations on the table is futile. I don’t think they will ever understand how to operate. Ignore CPFs. There is no sense in washing. CPN is all fake and speculation anyway. It’s not our fault. It is WYB who posted that and fed our clown minds.

and I think it will be so much better to post about that place and how yibo looks etc than make a clarification. they ( solos and other fans who have beef with us ) all say BXGs are “delusional” / “irrelevant” etc but they can keep on stalking our accounts and talking about us. In the meantime, we are still here, years later and THRIVING. 💛

[ideas-4-stories]

NOOOOOOOO I LOST THE AU I WROTE FOR YOU 😭😭😭 I LITERALLY SENT IT AND TUMBLR SAID "NETWORK ERROR". L FOR THE WIFI. L. Not cool I'm literally crying I thought that AU was genius. It was a Teacher!Buggy AU with Crocomom and Dadhawk. + Shanks co-parenting Luffy with Crocodile. That note was so long I literally spent like 45 mins writing it here on your ask and it was just. Gone. Or I think it did. Why does life hate me. I'm just gonna be brief with this cuz I still think it's golden lmao. Croco and Mihawk work long hours so their kids (Luffy, Zoro, Perona) have to wait for a few hours until they're picked up by their parents. The school doesn't have school buses bc I said so (no I am not cruel it's just out of my budget /j). So Buggy takes the responsibility to keep them comfortable and entertained while they wait. Croco and Mihawk meeting this charming (and clown looking) blue-haired guy and they start courting him. Shanks gets dragged in on the courting bc of Luffy. Also he was already courting Buggy. I didn't write their process of courting I basically skipped and went,, their wedding will take part in a Goth castle. And the design are all sunshine and rainbows (literally). Sanji, Usopp, Nami, Vivi, Zoro and Luffy being in a class along with other kids. Franky, Robin, Jinbei and Brook are in higher classes. Chopper is atom. Not here in the world yet. Perona is like, 2-3yrs older than her brothers so. Yeah *awkwardly shuffles* (I love perona I swear-). Implied Zosan. Some rando: but you didn't imply shi— Me: Shhh I did. *gaslighting*. Law is also there in the classroom with lower grade strawhats. He's suffering. He only attends 3 days a week tho, he's mostly homeschooled bc of his sickness. He's homeschooled by Cora. (You can pry Law and Cora from my cold dead hands. You can separate them when I dissolve into ashes). Don't worry as he gets older his sickness is cured. Ofc he's cured by Cora. He's saved by Cora in every universe. In every AU. Every Era. Every life they will ever live. I will die on that hill– *applies the nobody dies/everyone lives tag on this AU* let my babies be happy pls. Let my man Cora live and travel the world with this emo boy (Law). Doffy isn't real, he can't hurt anyone. Ace is there. Sabo is there. Every One Piece character is out there somewhere. They're like hidden stones and you have 0.02% of finding them. I thought I was just making a Teacher!Buggy AU but then it turns into a Modern!AU for everyone. Let's gooooo. Sora divorces with Judge and remarry with Zeff so now Sanji lives with all his brothers and his sister. They get separate classrooms tho, and reiju is perona's age so she's besties with her. (I do not play by canon's rules with ages bc i live in my own world) They both tease their brothers (Sanji and Zoro) about their crushes on each other. The heart crew is there. Bepo is a dog, a very fluffy one. Kuina is alive. Kaya is there, same classroom with Usopp. I have no idea how to continue this lmao, but I do hope you find this interesting bc Buggy is 100% great with kids and probably teaches well bc he is a big nerd and makes lessons interesting. (Also, the whole reason why I wrote this instead of letting the idea slip through my mind like the others is bc the image of two goth men courting a clown looking mf was funny to me. So here we are lmao. The way I wrote this makes Shanks look like he's the person they let into their open relationship twice lol I'm so sorry 😭😭)

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

That's really sad, I really like this idea (though I see Shanks and Buggy more as siblings, but I understand the idea of Shuggy) It's fine that this became about so many people, I really like this.

Teacher!Buggy sounds so cool, you know that he's the flashiest and maybe one of the craziness of the things he'll do to get his students good things that will boost their learning. He knows that every kid might not have the same learning paths as others.

How many classes does this man teach? Who knows, too many for how much he gets paid. All teachers needs to get paid more.

I would think Jinbei and Brook being other fun teachers in the school, like Tom could be as well!

I really like this idea, and the imagine of two gothic men trying to court a clown-looking mf is really funny to me as well.

[maveras-posts]

🖤ART 🤍✨HEADCANONS✨

Art the Clown General Tingz:

Art is c h a o t i c to say the least

He sometimes is manic and does some questionable things (he’s in a silly goofy mood)

Some nights he just stays up and practices his ✨MaKeUp✨ (May or may not listen to Britney Spears while doing it😭✋)

CLEAN YA MAKEUP BruShEs ART—

Art is also a Barb ( I’ve walked into some dance routines 😂✋)

Also ATTITUDE 🙄🤌

IS IT ME? AM I THE DrAmA?—YES my dear Art YES💅

Actually a big Teddy Bear if you can get him to warm up to you (Clingy VERY clingy)

Also LOVES the ✨TEA✨ he’s that gay bestie you tell everything to (Careful tho, ✨HE WONT HESITATE✨ to put a Bitch 6 FEET DEEP🙄✋)

Also loves cotton candy and ANYTHING flavored like it (Blood gotta be made from cotton candy syrup)

Also watch him he ✨NiBblEs✨ on arms and toes— ART DAFUQ. Art BIT ME— (ya know sometimes violence is the answer🙄💅)

Idk how to describe it but he smells like vanilla, blood and ✨DeViL’s LeTtuCe✨

Also LOVES Insane Clown Posse (Art is an insane clown and it feels nice to be represented)

He Shoplifts A LOT(EVERYTHING he owns is ✨StOleN✨)

Also the type of guy to be in Walmart at 3AM riding a bike or riding a shopping cart (The workers know him they leave him be)

Also has candy on him at all times (HE LOVES the ✨SoUr CaNDy✨)

Tbh one of my my favorites cause he is just fucking batshit crazy (Art is my homie for real)

So…I watched both the Terrifiers and I must say… I LOVED IT— tbh these movies are very slept on and forgotten especially our mans of the hour/ post whatevs… ART THE MUTHAFUCKIN CLOWNN— Idk why but instantly when he entered the diner I fell in LOVE. Lmfao I kinda knew he would just be CHAOTIC (I was right) he’s just such a lil shit and he ✨SLAYS✨ (literally and figuratively) so I cooked up these headcanons, don’t worry he confirmed and denied…

[ask-serendipity-sky]

The cult needs to STFU. Even if Jikook aren't dating, he has shown up more for Jk, then anyone lately. Who went to be with Jk during his single release in NY & Silver Day? Jimin. Who didn't? Who was first to post about Jk's BB 100? Jimin. Who didn't? Who was first to congratulate Jk on his bday? Jimin. Who didn't? Who came live to tell us to keep wishing for Jk's birthday? Jimin. Who didn't? Who was with JK on White Day in 2022? Jimin. Who wasn't? Who visited JK in his comments on White Day live 2023 when JK was alone, even tho he himself was out of the country and busy & when others were actually in Korea and didn't see JK? Oh that's right, Jimin. You know the live where JK was lonely, sad, crying, bringing up GCF Tokyo trip, playing There for You, spoiling all of Jimin's songs, even playing JVKE, knowing it was about to be released Jimin was working with him. Spoiling Set Me Free part 2 and then eventually told us to look forward to it. It was Jimin again and again and again. Where was Tae during all this? Since they want to always drag Tae into Jikook's business. Where was Tae last year on JK's bday? So Tae flew 14 hours from Washington to go straight to his friends premiere off the plane, but couldn't go see JK on his bday, after a 14 hour flight, his married partner he shares two adopted kids with? I guess between spending time with JN his GF in NY (since she was there when Tae was) and that 14 hour flight home, he just didn't have any more energy to go his husband. Where was Tae during JK's 2020 birthday? Oh yeah, at home asking Jimin to come sleep with him instead. Tae loves JK okay. You don't have to tell us. We know they do, but they aren't fucking and they aren't dating. They are friends. And honestly, if I were you, I'd just shut my fucking mouth about Jikook, because if this really was a dick measuring contest, which Taekookers try to make it out to be on which duo is more gay and has more potential to be real, sorry, but Taekook are coming in last. Vmin have a more real chance of being real over Taekook, considering Tae actually writes songs about Jimin and said he likes him the most. Clowns. All of them. So, no amount of TK Premiere appearances or bowling with friends, will ever change the fact that Tae just went public with JN in Paris, holding her hand, after nearly 2 years of dating proofs of them were leaked. Don't ever fucking speak on Jimin or Jikook again. Not while one half of your ship is in a now made public relationship, done on purpose by both Tae and JN. Losers. You got bigger things to worry about, then Jikook.

Oh and get your damn lies straight while you're at it. JK didn't hear Tae's album first. JK never once said this. Stop making up shit. He said he heard it. It was Jimin in 2022 Festa who said he and Tae had a listening party TOGETHER and Tae played him all his songs first. So sorry cult, soulmate is the one who actually heard his album first, confirmed by Vmin. It was Jimin and Tae agreed. But guess what else. Tae was with JN like 3 days after that Festa Dinner filmed, so he probably played them all for her too, while they were caught by a local in the car together on their Jeju date. Better luck next time losers.

Hi anon,

Agree with everything!

Tkkrs should be the last people celebrating anything right now.

Their ship never sailed to begin with.

The interactions between Tae and Jk have always been because they are friends. There is nothing else other than a friendship bond.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

[galaxycunt]

@shrimpmajordomo thanks for the tag!!

List 5 topics you can talk on for an hour without preparing any material.

@gayafsatan @gingernut1314 @skarphedinn @gabegade let’s see 🧐

1. American folklore, don’t let me get into tribal stories and cryptids we will be there all day sorry like the real ones tho like animals we think are extinct but ppl swear they saw one and like myths in general

2. Movies, and other media studies related stuff. That was my double major in college bc it was easy to make it into one with the design/advertising degree I had lmao I also was a comp lit minor so I be analyzing things and watching video essays

3. The Manson Murders and The Golden State Killer. My dads favorite book was Helter Skelter so he was like u should read it when I was like 14 and my family is from California so I heard a few stories like I remember my mom saying the rumor for gsk was he targeted yellow houses and she lived in one (tho at the time he was the night stalker bc the other one I think)

Also forensic stuff but i blame the fact two teachers taught us that bc they saw dead bodies at some point (I was gonna keep going on this see what I mean)

4. Pirates. I loved it since I was a kid, I even that that pirateology book and in college took an anthropology course on pirates. Idk something about them I was like whoa!!! Cool!!! Also like cowboys? But I grew up in the west so I mean that’s most people lmao

5. Circuses. I was sooo into the old design at circus circus with the old circus posters and my mom watched hbo carnivale and I used to have night terrors featuring clowns so I was like let’s find out more shall we 🕵️

But maybe that’s just all ties into Americana and the culture of the early days of this country idk!

[elysiumxii]

GET TO KNOW THE MUN

NAME?: Kai

PRONOUNS?: she/her/they

PREFERENCE OF COMMUNICATION?: I don't care as long as you talk to me tbh. IMs is a great place to start and then once we have a ship, i'll be in all your business on all platforms.

MOST ACTIVE MUSE(S)?: helios, giselle, antonio... and honestly, i wish i was writing more of them, more often. 🥺

EXPERIENCE / HOW MANY YEARS?: okay i have to really think and it's a bit fuzzy... because i think... well i was writing by the time i started university in 2009, on a forum for Super Junior. I wrote fanfiction before that in about 2008? i don't need a calculator i will not be looking at how many years that is...

BEST EXPERIENCE? oft hard to answer, i have both so many and the world's most appalling memory. the excitement of any budding new ship is truly what keeps me going, but i do remember one in particular with a bar tender muse of mine and a 'straight' firefighter that just... oh it was good. then more recently it would be meeting @okajibana and forming my whole existence around her, you're stuck with me now! plus every time i get a notification from @irrwicht or @temporalobjects my day is always improved.

RP PET PEEVES?: ohhh it's possibly going to get me some hate, and look, if it works for you? you go boo... but it's greeting starters. they're usually one liners and someone has maybe picked a muse of yours but then they fling it out there, and i'm like... what do i do with that? there's no setting, there's no context, it's maybe a bit of dialogue and i'm cut adrift to try and work out what to do with it? that for me is not fun. i have added it to my rules that i don't want them but i still get them and... i feel so bad ignoring them, but also am too awkward to be like, hey, have this back and maybe plot with me? i will plot with anyone and i will hype your ideas to the moon and back but, a throw away one liner... i can't do nothing with. (and listen, maybe i'm the problem! everyone else seems happy!) also small text is nice to look at and it's easy to add now! js...

FLUFF, ANGST, OR SMUT? i feel like if i said anything other than smut, online pals from the rafters would scream for me to be real. imma be real with you, this is a smut blog wrapped up in fancy wrapping that makes it seem like i'm here for the plot... i'm here for the d-! jk i'm happy to be here i will write anything... smut tho...

PLOTS OR MEMES?: plots i'm just good at memes. if we have a ship, use me for drabbles that's all i'm saying.

LONG OR SHORT REPLIES?: long. i have a rule about mutually agreed lengths because i can't with just one paragraph that doesn't go anywhere im sorry! i find short replies so unsatisfying and maybe i'm a demanding bitch idk.

TIME TO WRITE?: i try for an hour or two every week day evening GMT. i do my business, then i get into bed and work through my drafts. usually can't do weekends cuz the bf is all up here demanding my attention and shit. ugh men.

ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSE(S)?: yeah lol every bit of clown foolery, where they do or say dumb shit, is me. some of them are know it alls like me (looking at you alistair), some of them are dumb like me... giselle... some of them open their mouth and say shit and then go, oops, like me, heather, cory omg...

tagged by: @irrwicht and @temporalobjects (MY BABEESSSS)

tagging: @bvrningshq @okajibana @champagneandparacosm @svndri @sentimentalscientia @lellarps

[matcha-lemonade-enthusiast]

i’m going to give a comprehensive list of songs that hit way too hard for me or that i cry to, because im little lonely (only child syndrome) and have no one else to tell 😁.

Liability by Lorde

i so vividly remember listening to this song for the first time, and it was like someone put how i felt every single fucking day into a song. i just felt like a huge burden to everyone and everything. especially since i had to whole sad clown thing going on (being the life of the party and silly until i had to be apart from anything that happily distracted me). so many nights were spent laying on the ground and staring at the ceiling, or sobbing in a dark closet to that song. thanks lorde 😍! (/s)

Stay by Post Malone

by far one of the most embarrassing songs on this list 😭. sorry unfortunately i dabble in hating mainstream artists (particularly yt men). however, an old friend of mine showed me this song as one of her fave sad songs to cry to, and i was like thanks im stealing this for my playlist 😁. once again just a song that put my thoughts into words (omg i love art), and i really just needed someone to hug me and tell me everything would be okay. also strangely, it’s a great song for if you’ve had a rocky relationship with your mom or anyone you love so deeply you’d do anything for but shit happens and you both fumble the ball, so now everyone is pissed off. like post simultaneously asking someone to (hopefully figuratively)put their cigarette out on his face, but also stick around for him and love him and tell him everything is okay? yeah real.

I’m Not A Mountain by Sarah Kinsley

fully almost cried when i saw/heard this live, because Sarah almost cried. *defeated* yeah. just another lonely girl who can’t set a boundary to save her life so she runs from her problems and has a sharp tongue song. i’ve said things that i didn’t mean out of anger and so deeply regret because i caused a friendship to end. i have people i (sort of) want a relationship with that i can’t get back because i’ve learned too much and im living in the past in some ways (rightfully so imo) (yes im contradicting myself ik). but yeah sometimes i wish i was a mountain too.

Last Time We Never Meet Again by Sarah Kinsley

sarah kinsley you will always be famous.

but fr this song was simultaneously a swift kick to the gut, but also a breath of fresh air. i was fresh off of calling it quits with a guy (like a month lol), and i had a lot of firsts with him (first serious relationship, first music festival, first time traveling without family, etc) not s*x though someone else beat him to it lmao.) so basically i was ranting to my mom and friends about him and everything i didn’t like that he did, because everything around me reminded me of him and it PISSED ME OFF to no end. then this album (Escaper) dropped (thank god), and once again this song was just everything i felt. like i can’t stand you, i never want to see you again, but hope everything works out how you want it to (im not a monster guys cmon). he called me tho like last week to make small talk and then ask me questions about his personality and stuff. so then that re-pissed me off bc i deleted his number while i was drunk on vacation, and i don’t follow him on anything anymore like pls take a hint.

Casual by Chappell Roan

self-explanatory.

Magnolia by Laufey

let me preface this by being a butthole and let everyone know how cool i am, because i was into laufey before she was uber famous. like im talking tickets to her show were $30. anyways!

basically a girl strung me along, and then left me for a mid yt man 😁. this song was there for me when i was too embarrassed to tell my friends what happened. didn’t cry, but definitely gazed out of my window on a rainy day and listened to the song on repeat for an hour or two (yes this is a part of my villain origin story) (yes i know im a terrible villain fr, more sad and lazy than vengeful)

Baby by Brittany Howard

feeling like i wasn’t enough and didn’t measure up (especially romantically)

Sullen Girl by Fiona Apple

my mom actually played an old fiona apple cd for me while we packed up our house to move. this song really stuck with me bc that whole summer (‘22) was a blur. the second half of the song genuinely sent me into shock because it gave me war flashbacks of childhood trauma that i try to repress 😍. then my mom told me, she pictured me as the sullen girl during my lowest moments and i cried and we hugged.

Cellophane by FKA Twigs

self-explanatory. especially if you’ve seen anania’s tiktoks to this song (doing mundane tasks, deadpan thousand yard stare, and this song blaring). i feel the same way girl, me too. also that music video is literally stunning.

Prey by The Neighborhood

ahhh an old classic. honestly the whole Wiped Out! album is good to cry to but this is a personal favorite. sobbed for two hours then fell asleep because why not. i felt like a waste of space that couldn’t do anything right (i still feel like that sometimes). you are so right jesse rutherford i do feel like something is wrong (i have extreme anxiety, everything feels off and i will freak out at any moment) i feel like prey (i will be chastised and ostracized the moment i do something wrong, and everyone is watching, also i was unmedicated).

okay besties this was a really short little playlist and long thoughts i randomly wanted to get out. thanks for letting me be annoying and reading 😍 (i say to my 5 followers, 2 of which are bots)

[kuravix]

btw totally agree re: sanjis eyebrow in the live action im surprised more people aren't accepting of it, much like usopp's nose it would probaby just look too silly outside of a drawn format and in live action. i'm even kinda wondering if his relation to women will be slightly altered (tho east blue arc sanji was more subdued anyway) to make more sense in a live action format than the kinda typical pervert gags associated with manga, and i wonder how people would react to that even if it makes sense. but its funny to me that ppl are taking the eyebrow thing so seriously with germa and stuff hehe. so thank u for saying so bc i thought i was losing my mind that no one else was like 'oh its probably just practicality'.

Oops, I deleted the post then promptly got this message 😅 sorry, felt like I was being annoying with all my live action comments. I said "people are coming up with theories as to why live action Sanji doesn't have curly eyebrows when the likely reason is makeup/costume teams couldn't figure out how to make it work."

Yeah, I think some people are forgetting real people would have to wear these props for hours. Speak with them, touch them, do stunts in them plus get them wet, there's a lot of water in One Piece! I don't know anything about these sorts of things but I get that making a shaped eyebrow look natural and stay on the face sounds complicated. It would be rather distracting if someone had a clear prop on their face. I was expecting Usopp's nose to be gone. Making something like that look good and be comfortable for the actor sounds impossible. It works for Buggy since it's meant to look like a clown nose, not skin.

The main two theories I've seen are he shaves them either because he's embarrassed or they connect him with Germa. Sure in canon he's self conscious of his eyebrows appearance, he gets teased a lot. But curly eyebrows are not exclusive to Germa. From the top of my head, humans with curls are; Duval, fake Sanji and the villian in Unlimited World Red designed by Oda. Sanji went years without being associated with them, all the while his eyebrows on display.

Also the series isn't even out yet. There's no guarantee there will even be a season 2. I don't think the live action crew are planning stuff pOST TIME SKIP THAT WOULD TAKE YEARS TO GET TO OMG. I'll be amazed if they manage to reach Ace's death, wow that's so far! Plus it's on Netflix, infamous for cancelling shows! No, I fully doubt live action Sanji not having curls has anything to do with Germa.

I've only heard rumours Sanji will be more of a flirt rather than a perv. It being made with a western audience in mind, I can't imagine them making him pervy.

[anonbinaryweirdo]

HI !! i feel like we shld get to know each other more outside of what weve already told each other sooo-

im filipino !! sometimes i use taglish (tagalog + english) when speaking <3 m a lot more fluent in english tho ;; i loveee all shades of blue, specifically periwinkle (its so pretty……..), n i also love pokemon, kny, n mha :3 (rlly hate their fanbases tho. i have. words. about them.) i have several phobias, some of them pretty weird to have as a 16y/o 😭 its uh,,, stairs, dolls, tight spaces, tiny holes, clowns, darkness n the smallest problems cause me a lot of distress… (yesterday i couldnt use spotify abroad for more than 2weeks n i was panicking for like 15 minutes until i was able to change my location 😭) i watch a lot of matpat (namely film theory n game theory), n coryxkenshin !! a few poketubers here n there (mandjtv, patterrz n pm7) but these two r who i watch mainly <3

omg

i only know English BUT I'm learning German :D (I haven't seen Duolingo in months but i can pick up on things fast)

my attention span and memory is... phew. I also tend to have a short fuse but I'm very patient and I can control myself I promise pls don't run away from me. also my first instinct when someone does something to upset my friend is to get physical (and if it's through screen I can argue for hours. one of my teachers+ bestie said I could run for something (governor, president, etc.. I forgor)

green. i love greens I love them all sm. I like earthy colors but green <333

i curse... a lot :D

i also watch a lot of matpat !! I'm also an 8bitryan (my comfort YouTuber fr) and Kubz Scouts enthusiast 🫶🏽

i also like kny and mha !! Nezuko n Kaminari my loves <3 (t.. the fanbases.......//neg)

I'm typically calm in situations most of the time, save for when I'm not going feral and committing arson on this very blog

I'm not scared of much? probably adults that are over 25 but other than that nothing IMMEDIATELY comes to minspiders.

I use endearments a lot !! despite being the (so far as I know) second youngest of all my mutuals I call (as long as I know they're comfortable with it) a lot of them "baby," chances are I'll use platonic endearments on you too out of habit so lmk if this makes you uncomfortable <3

i love kids 🫶🏽 I helped raise a few and I was/am a babysitter,, love them just as much as I love dogs

i like. i like to ramble and rant (as you're seeing rn). don't let me find out we have a similar interest AND you allow rambling I'll go crazy real fast. speaking of I hyperfixations I fixate on a lot of things at the same time sosjksj(rihh now its mainlty Hamilton and Genshin)

i can't remember much (like. birthdays, names, dates, or anything you might have told me two seconds ago. i probably zoned out or it just flew past my head) but I do (try to) remember small details about people :D

I am. not on any medication for adhd so I go insane on here. a lot. my thoughts are js.. if I think it I say it and THEN think about what I've said AFTER I say it and bang my head against the table in shame

i like collecting leaves

i also like women but I mean I guess men are attractive too

[hermit-frog]

I love how those lestat fans anons are so angered by Louis lmao LDPDL the power that you have! He makes them loose their mind over his beautiful existence. They cannot comprehend how enthralling and compelling he is as a character. And why their fave is at his feet and will always be.

I'm always laughing when lestat fans complain about Louis being whiny when he has legit reasons to be sad and complain about his life. But if we have to point out fingers at whiny people, Lestat is right there. Like this man is the definition of whiny and pathetic. His fans have to brass themselves because we're going to see more of this side of him in s3.

But like Jacob said "fuck Lestat". This abusive asshole of a man was never worthy of Louis and I'm glad Louis choose himself. Had their reunion in that shack and he said "it was nice seeing you but that's about it. I love my life as it is right now and I wouldn't change it for anyone. Adieu!✌️"

that was blatant bait, just wanted to share

Louis is such a complex and deeply layered character, idk how people can find him uninteresting. He is kind of silently gloomy, he likes to ponder, soak in his sadness and grief. He expresses it with anger (at others and himself). A very depressed vampire, love that closure he got for himself, growth✨ (ignoring the implication of that ending).

Lestat is a narcissistic drama queen. I find both characters interesting, but Louis is my fav while Lestat is on the bottom, he's (unintentionally) hilarious, but i just simply don't think about him (if i do, i either laugh or get mad), while i could discuss Louis for hours. I am biased, ik, but idc, i love him unconditionally. It's hard to hate bookStat because he's so stupid it's funny, showStat is also stupid af, but he pisses me off more, i will never get over how he treated both Louis and Claudia, what he did to them. I'm happy for Louis tho 💖

it's silly to have a one-sided beef with a fictional character, i appreciate what Lestat's character is portraying in the show, he's simply a tool to share a certain idea/message/story after all. my problem centers on the reception he gets. the double standards when it comes to Louis and Claudia, insane.

it would be so funny when we get to s3, and the “real” Lestat, from his own pov, is even worse lmao, he's such a clown. i mean, i was reading the books and i just, i can't even be mad because of the ridiculousness? 😂

oh hey Niki, why u crying lol anyway, i'm leaving today, going to trave. oh, about that, do you remember that fucked up scary ass vamp who had kidnapped and tortured you? yeah, the one who had released you literally just this morning ha ha... so, i'm leaving you with him and his minions, yeah those guys, i think it will be a nice experience for you. oh, no, don't cry! i know that you already miss me but i can't take you with me, i'll write you tho. oh, please stop the hysterics, it's not that serious, you will see me soon. very cute of you to cry because you love me so much btw :/ anyway, have fun, make new friends, i'm sure you'll have lots of great experiences ;) x

lestat had really listened to armand's backstory, and was like, hm, this marius guy, would love to meet and be friends with him. lmao 😭 and then rubs it in armand's face? i can't. there was a similar post, but i can't find it, i'll try to do something similar. so all this time you though marius was dead, crying yourself to sleep, wishing he'd save you, grieving him? yeah, so he's actually... doing great? yep, this whole time lol oh, and he came to me, like, immediately ha ha ha. we had so much fun. remember his secret he refused to share with you? no, no, he hadn't just told me, he took me to them! can you believe it, lmaaaao. and then i drank our mother's blood, mmm😏.... just made realize, since i am my mother's maker, it makes me her father and master😏...i will return to these thoughts later today, once i'm alone))) oh, yeah, so marius was like, if you tell anyone i'm going to kill everyone you love and then you. but then he was like, jk lol he even game a loving nickname, so silly. are you sure it's the same guy who had beat the living shit out of you over nothing? the one from whom you had to hide under some chick's bed? naaah, can't be him. he says i'm his favorite, which is ridiculous because we knew each other for days, ha ha ha

and with the body thief, jesus christ (talking about jesus christ😏yep), lestat. oh, so this random guy, who has been stalking me, who steals bodies (he said so himself, and even tried to steal mine without my consent lol), that everyone had warned me about, suggested to swap bodies for like a week, and he promised to give mine back, so nice of him. obviously i had accepted lol, but i think he might have tricked me??? like, he left me with nothing? but that wasn't sus tho. but he haven't shoved up to switch our bodies back, so weird, really didn't expect this :/ anyway, pissing sucks, and i really want to fuck that old man david, oh and for some reason my brain has connected him to claudia??? yea, but i wanna hit real bad (to be fair lestat wants to bang everyone)

i have a new daughter now, she's married to my clone btw ;)

the core of all the vamps, the spirit Amel: *looks and acts just like Lestat* Lestat: i want you so bad🥵

normal person: Hello, my name is -. lestat: I’m the vampire Lestat. I’m six feet tall, have blue-gray eyes that sometimes appear violet, and a lean athletic build. My hair is blond and thick and hangs to my shoulders, and over the years it has become lighter so that at times it seems pure white. My face is square, my mouth full and sensual, my nose insignificant, and I am perhaps one of the most conventional looking of the Undead you’ll ever see. Almost all vampires are beautiful. They are picked for their beauty. But I have the boring appeal of a Matinee Idol-

you can't make this shit up, those books were a trip