#real Swiss cheese is the best cheese

[rabbitcruiser]

National Cheese Day

June 4 is National Cheese Day. Not to be confused with other popular cheese related holidays like grilled cheese day, cheesecake day, or mac and cheese day. This day is in reverence of the queen of all dairy, the big cheese.

When is National Cheese Day 2024?

Cheese and its many varieties are celebrated on National Cheese Day on June 4.

History of National Cheese Day

Cheese making is an ancient, some might even say sacred, craft. So ancient in fact it predates recorded history. It is speculated that the magic of cheese making began somewhere around 8000BCE shortly after the domestication of animals. Archeological digs have found evidence of cheese around the world including strainers coated in milk-fat molecules in Kuyavia, Poland dated around 5500BCE, murals in Egypt dated at 2000BCE, and an artifact of preserved cheese in Xinjiang, China believed to be more than 3,000 years old! European Imperialism took their styles of cheese through Asia, sub saharan Africa, and eventually to the Americas.

The most popular cheese of all is (obviously) mozzarella. This delicious and pizza topping cheese was first created near Naples from the rich milk of water buffalos. At the time, it rarely left its home near Naples, as it was made from pasteurized milk, and a lack of refrigeration meant it had a very short shelf life. As both cheese technology and refrigeration systems advanced, this delicious cheese left the southern region of Italy and found itself traveling around the world.

There are two types of mozzarella produced within the United States — low moisture and high moisture. Low moisture mozzarella has a moisture content less than 50% while high moisture has a content of over 52%. Low moisture is made specifically for transportation and mass production as the lack of moisture gives it a longer shelf life.

Today, cheese dishes can be found on every continent served savory, sweet, melted, deep fried, and even chilled in ice cream. This household staple can still satisfy any craving after thousands of years.

National Cheese Day timeline

1815 Industrial Revolution

First large scale industrial cheese production begins in Switzerland.

1851 Mass production

Jesse Williams, a farmer, is credited with being the first to have an assembly-line of cheese production in Rome, New York.

1939-1945 Goodbye Mom and Pop

Factory made cheese surpasses the production numbers of traditional farm raised cheeses during World War II.

1982 Mama Mia

The Mozzarella Company was founded in Dallas to bring fresh Mozzarella to America.

By The Numbers

4% – the percentage of all cheese being sold that ends up stolen. 1,400 pounds – the weight of a block of cheddar cheese delivered to the White House once by President Andrew Jackson. 2 – the hours it took for 10,000 visitors to the White House to finish the block of cheddar cheese. 17th century – the period in which they started dyeing cheese orange to fool people into thinking it was higher quality. ½ – of the total cheese consumption in the world is of Gouda cheese. 1,000 – the estimated number of different French cheeses. 1615 B.C. – the year when the oldest known cheese was discovered in China.

National Cheese Day Activities

Charcuterie

Take a cooking class

Cook something

Make a spread of some of your favorite cheeses to enjoy solo or with friends. Try working in new and international varieties you’ve never tried before. Check out Pinterest for ideas on the best meat, wine, and veggie pairings.

You may be surprised how many cheese themed educational experiences there are. Learn how to make your own cheese at home, the perfect drink and food pairings, or discover a new cheesy dish. With workshops, in person classes, and free online tutorials there are a lot of ways you can learn to enjoy this ancient culinary staple.

Whether traditional comfort food like mac n cheese, the tangy sweetness of cheesecake, or the contemporary refinement of stuffed pull apart bread there are countless cheese recipes to try. Why not try a new twist on a family recipe or search the internet for the latest cheese trend. You can start simple with a five ingredient ricotta cheese recipe.

5 FACTS ABOUT CHEESE THAT WILL BLOW YOUR MIND

It’s vegan!

Americans cut the cheese

Don’t forget the stomach

Medieval curds

Cheesy Moon

Okay, not really, but dairy free cheese is definitely having a renaissance. Food experimentation has come a long way in recent decades offering up many plant based cheese alternatives you can find at major grocery retailers or your local vegan butcher shop (if you’re lucky enough to have one).

Contrary to popular assumption the U.S., not Europe, is the biggest producer of cheese, making up 29% of the global market. In order the top producing countries are the United States, Germany, France, and Italy.

Rennet is curdled milk and complex enzymes found in the fourth stomach of unweaned calves and is often added in the cheese making process, as it is considered to make a bolder, richer quality product.

The most popular types of cheeses of today like gouda, cheddar, parmesan, and camembert, all came in vogue during or after the Middle Ages.

The long standing myth that the moon is made out of cheese may stem from “The Proverbs of John Heywood” back in 1546 which stated "the moon is made of a green cheese." We now understand this to be more metaphor than literal, with “green” referring to the freshness or un-aged nature of the moon.

Why We Love National Cheese Day

Expanding our Palate

New cultural experiences

Sharing and bonding

We love taking our taste buds on new adventures! Today can be about trying so much more than cheese. Wine, beer, meats, veggies, deserts… all of it is up for grabs and we can’t wait.

As an international food staple, National Cheese Day opens the door to a variety of new cultural experiences. We love being able to explore new dishes, cultures, and traditions.

We love breaking cheesy bread and making new memories with the ones we love.

Source

[fisherrprince]

aight

medium cheddar: extremely hit or miss. my favorite brand is tillamook and im not biased about it. great to just munch on though, it's not really a cheese that wants or needs anything else. good base ingredient for like a grilled cheese. perfectly average 6/10.

sharp cheddar: i love extra sharp cheddar i love you looong aged white sharp cheddar FANTASTIC snack and best with some sweet apples or something. Needs a cracker or bread or some sweeter snack on the side. coastal cheddar from costco is good but can be a bit too sharp with lots of crystallization. 9/10. 

mozzarella: ok i dont like tillamook for this one. too dry. mozzarella is really not a cheese i like to eat by itself, i'm not a cheese stick fan and i really dislike the texture of wet mozzarella balls, but when it's good melted ON stuff it's good on stuff. 7/10 grilled pizza cheese pull

pepperjack: this is THEEEE cheese to grate for a recipe and sneak like 20 bites of the grated cheese. little pepper bits in there. I don't enjoy eating slices of it though. 7/10

parmesan: you cant go wrong with a little parma jawn............. best as a little accent on top of stuff. just makes whatever you're cooking a lil tastier. Not my favorite when the whole thing tastes of just parmesan though, it's kinda bitey. 8/10

cottage cheese: i cant stand cottage cheese. The texture is nasty and the combo of the texture with the flavor is nastier. 1/10

gruyere: french. INCREDIBLE on potatoes and in fondue and in little bits to snack on. Not an eating by itself cheese often but it doesnt have to be. I'd eat this grated on top of kinda anything savory. 9/10

gouda: i get this mixed up with gruyere all the time, but gouda is a bit harder and sweeter. a good salami cheese for your charcuterie. you see smoked gouda a lot which if thats YOUR deal thats cool but i dislike the taste of smoked things. 7/10

blue cheese: really really good cheese that is stymied by not going with a lot of stuff and not being super good to just eat on its own. it's a SHARP taste that gets in your nose. gorgonzola specifically is so good with pears and arugula except I'm mildly allergic to pears. BEST with steak gimme dat blue cheese butter STEAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! would be 9/10 if it were not so particular. 7/10.

feta: bit of a weird texture but it makes salads and gyros ROCK so. it gets a pass. not that fancy on its own but i really do like it in a salad. 6/10. 

cream cheese: YEAAAAHHHHH BAGELLLLSSSS 9/10 i love bagels. also makes other dishes creamy (best part of cheese)

manchego: best with salami. not that impressive on its own, but that's because it's a harder cheese you eat with salami. 5/10, elevates meat but the meat does not elevate it

brie: somehow airplane brie is better than normal brie??? i don't eat this cheese unless it's on an airplane meal fr. which means i hardly ever eat brie. kinda weird tasting. 4/10

camembert: miraculous ladybug hyped me up for this cheese and i bought some and must have done it wrong or something because it doesn't smell and hardly tasted different from brie. I want to try it again so bad because gooey cheeses are like drool-worthy to me. hesitant 3/10 for being a disappointment

asiago: yknow an asiago bread is pretty good but ive never had asiago cheese on its own! 6/10? umami

cotija: BIG FAN of cotija. pile that stuff on my tacos thank you. i dont have the same problems as i do with feta maybe because you grate or crumble cotija real small in comparison? havent had it on anything but a taco though. 8/10 

goat cheese: also a big fan of goat cheese. you can fry it and its good, and you can put it in pasta and its good, you can eat it with crackers and it's good... not really good with meat, but it's sharper so that makes sense to me. 8/10 again

swiss cheese: i never really liked swiss cheese. unless its on my sandwich. OR! unless it's like specifically emmentaler and it's in my fondue. 4/10

provolone: SAME goes for provo LONE. makes french dip really good though, and is one of the classic salami cheeses. this is because it needs salt. 5/10 better than swiss

edam: this is babybel cheese, right? it's fine. good for snacking not for eating a lot of. 7/10

colby jack: this is literally cheddar but not. id rather have cheddar 5/10

ricotta: controversially, i love ricotta... it doesnt have a lot of flavor which makes eating it by itself unpleasant. HOWEVER!!!!!!!!!! in lasagne..? on top of sourdough with salt and garlic? in a kolache with jam?? i lvoe ricotta. i wish it didn't go bad so fast. or maybe it came in smaller packages. 8/10

american cheese: the only place this thing shines is ON BURGER. where it SHOULD BE, KIND OF ALWAYS. or on a bacon egg and cheese. those are the two places you always want american. situationally 8/10 but usually 4/10 i dont want it anywhere else

muenster: the best part of eating muenster cheese is eating the little slice that always seems to come off the edge when you take it out the package. otherwise it's a perfectly serviceable mild cheese, melts well, 6/10.

pecorino romano: like, parmesan's sharper saltier more fashion-forward cousin. use this in moderation imo it really has a Big Taste to it, but it makes carbonara nummy, 7/10

paneer: i have not HAD... paneer... but it LOOKS like it would be tasty. withholding judgement. 

gournay: i love those little boursin rounds you can just get at the store with the garlic and herbs. soft, savory, good on crackers 9/10

infused flavor cheeses: these are usually fresh cows milk cheeses that have like some kinda flavor or spice on them or rolled into them. All depends on the flavoring. The base cheese itself is usually real mild and creamy though, and I have good experiences with it! Also goes bad a bit fast though. Variable/10

theres other cheeses out there but i just realized ive been talking about cheese for a LOOONG TIIIMMMEEE. i like cheese though. big fan of it. if u think of some other cheese you really want an opinion on i will readily tell you

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Aita for "yelling" at my teenage sister for putting earrings through the ears of my childhood stuffed animal?

🤬🐘 <- cause that was me holding them when I found out lmao

So I (22 two spirit, I was 20 when this happened) have had Ellie (Ive used He/she/they for Ellie my whole life, they never had a set gender), a stuffed realtively realistic elephant, since I was at least 3 years old. He was a plush of big Al, the elephant mascot for crimson Tide of the university of Alabama. (Roll tide?) that my dad owned but eventually it was cuddled by 3 yr old me and dragged to my room and out of his man cave (which I don't know why he had a big al plush, we're from Ohio) never to return. I think she had a jersey or hat or something at some point but she doesn't now. Considering just how cuddled Ellie was, it's a miracle how good her condition is. No rips, tears, bald patches or holes beyond the plasticy coating on one of his tusks ripping off in a few places. I wasn't super violent with my toys and never drew on them or ripped them up. The most I did was put hair ties around her ears so they'd look like pigtails.

I've had Ellie a very very long time obviously and he means a lot to me. I very rarely cuddle him now because I want him to stay in that good condition. Well, when I was 19, I moved to Maryland to be with my partner and Ellie went with me obviously. 3 or 4 times a year, me and my partner make the trip to Ohio to visit my family, about 8 hrs away. I bring Ellie because she comforts me when we're there (Alot of traumatic memories are wrapped up in childhood home). Well, one time Ellie got left behind and I was devastated. It was gonna be at least 3 months till I went back and even though my mom offered to send ellie through the mail, i was not willing to take the chance that ellie could get lost forever in said mail so i waited.

Here's the part where I mention I have a younger sister who was 14 at the time. we have a good, if not distant relationship that is a much better place now. Here's where the problem occurred. I returned home after about 3 months after accidentally leaving ellie and immediately wanted to find him once I arrived. My mom told me my sister had been watching them while I was away so I went to her room. My sister then excitedly held up Ellie to me... Ellie's big ears were absolutely littered with my sister's (real) earrings. There had to of been at least 150 piercings in her ears, if not 200. I held myself together as best I could and very sternly told her I was pissed she'd do that, she knew how much Ellie meant to me and she should never treat other people's things that way.

I make a very strong point to never insult, scream or yell or not explain why I'm angry at someone. If I get so angry I can't handle my composure, I leave and gather myself then come back. I never insulted my sister or raised my voice but I definitely hammered how disrespectful and destructive this was to something that wasn't hers as I took out her earrings one by one. My childhood stuffie did not deserve to be turned into Swiss cheese and used as an earring display. If I had done anything like that to her stuffed giraffe, her stuffie, she'd have a cow. Once they were all out I took Ellie and went to my room. Luckily, they were normal sized earrings so the holes were very small and I can't see them if I don't look for them but it felt so disrespectful.

My sister apologized pretty quickly but my mom said I didn't have to yell at her (I never raised my voice but I was clearly hiding an angry one trying to explain to her) nor should I have said it 5 times in the moment (shes exaggerating). I'll admit I repeat myself twice or thrice in the moment as a way to keep myself from raising my voice or stewing in it if I feel like i haven't properly expressed my anger or I feel like the person wasn't listening. Everything is cool now and we dont really talk about it (it's not taboo or too painful to touch, it just doesn't come up) but I wonder if I over reacted considering the holes are tiny, not super visible and I don't think my sister did it to spite me or hurt Ellie, she was just young and dumb and didn't think about how it could mess up Ellie. Should I have held my tounge since shes my sister? She was only 14 but I feel like you should know earrings can cause damage to fabric when you're 14, there's no way she didn't know that wouldn't leave tiny holes in Ellie. I just think she didn't think of them as a big deal.

What are these acronyms?

[thesupreme316]

its me again 🤪 i was wondering if you could do aew boys reaction to you getting attacked by your tag team partner exp: you guys lost a tag match and you partner attacks you i hope i explained well🫶🏼🩷

I GOTCHUUUU

AEW Stars React to: You Being Attacked By Your Tag Partner

Pairings: Hook X Reader, Eddie Kingston X Reader, Daniel Garcia X Reader, Darius Martin X Reader, Kenny Omega X Reader, MJF X Reader, Ricky Starks X Reader

Word Count: 1K

Supreme Speaks: thanks to @cassiesworldsworld for requesting (keep em coming)! Reader is gender-neutral in this. nothing else...I hope you all are doing well and please remember that you are loved and appreciated

Warnings: Nun, barely proofread, GIFS ARE NOT MINE

Taglist: @cassiesworldsworld @hooks-martin @hookerforhook @wwenhlimagines @triscillal @sheinthatfandom @eddie-kingstons-wifey

Okay, I have 3 options for this (Reader is gender-neutral applicable to anyone; your partner is of your choosing):

Either you lose via roll-up and are attacked immediately after the match (Bayley attacks Sasha Banks)

After the match, you were attacked by your tag partner who joins the enemy (Luchasaurus attacks Jungle Boy and joins with Christian Cage)

Y’all lost the match, get a standing ovation, and your partner attacks you after you guys hug (Tommaso Ciampa attacks Johnny Gargano)

Bottomline is you were attacked and now your significant other/best friend is angry

Hook

Mans is big mad; like big big mad

You thought he was trying to whip Jack’s ass? Wait until he sees you get attacked

Man will jump over your body real quick to try to punch your former tag partner (if they are a male)

^^might get a heart attack to be honest from him leaping

Will immediately carry backstage as your former tag partner runs to the back

Is simmering with anger as you try to convince you’re okay

“I’m happy that you’re okay. I just really wanna kill that son of a bitch”

Does not take this matter lightly, especially after Jack betraying him

If you wanna get your lick back, just let him and he’ll take care of everything

Ricky Starks

Just like Hook, he would take this shit so seriously (cause of Hobbs betraying him)

But also I feel like he would understand the former partner’s stance as he betrayed Brian Cage (ew)

Will comfort you as you have multiple emotions running through your mind

“They’re missing out on a friendship with a bombass, beautiful, fierce, strong, athletic, and great person….and you too.”

I think he would be the type to transform you (ring gear, style, promos) so you can show your former partner that you’re simply better (nail emoji)

Like I’m talking early 2000s movie montage

Ricky would definitely help you plan your revenge

Overall, I believe this man would help you get back on your feet

Darius Martin

His heart would break for you and would be the one to sprint out to help you out of the ring and up the ramp

Darius is a very loyal person as he frequently rotates between AR Fox, Matt Sydal, his brother, and Action Andretti for tag partner

Will always offer a place on his team for you

“You know you always got me and the boys.”

Will take his thoughts to Twitter just to shit on them

I also think Darius will make it his mission to make sure that you were well taken care of; advises you to choose peace before violence

But if too much violence takes place; he’s walking out with a steel chair and zero fucks to give

Eddie Kingston

THIS MAN??? HE DOESNT CARE WHO THEY ARE; THEY’RE GETTING THEIR ASS CHEWED UP, SPAT OUT, AND BEAT TF UP

Will again blame Claudio, Bryan, and Punk for everything (don’t let him find out they joined BCC)

I think he would take this more personally than you, especially if they joined with his enemies

“FUCK THAT LOW DOWN, SLIMY, SWISS CHEESE BITCH! AND BRYAN TOO, THAT TECHNICAL ASS BITCH! I’ll stab them dawg don’t worry”

Eddie is the type to ride or die for his people; so he is one of the first people to stand with you against the traitor

Is absolutely down for revenge or crazy plans

“I still got that gasoline can if you need dawg.”

Daniel Garcia

Will immediately offer you a place in JAS (like I always say, PLEASE say NO)

But also with the way JAS is right now, he would take time to team with you; so he can also find peace

Will be smug toward your former teammate

“Listen here, Y/N is a talented person and you’re gonna wish you didn’t cross them.” Dances away

Like stated earlier, I think he would take this time to fully understand his position with his own teammates

Daniel would be your #1 cheerleader on Twitter and tag them in various posts shitting on them (like Darius)

Will give you advice on how to carry on and will try to convince you to be a sports entertainer

MJF

THIS MOTHERFUCKER

Always had a feeling that it was coming, but he wouldn’t tell you and is angry with the entire situation

Has to keep in character on Twitter:

“Look, I understand that Y/N loses a lot, isn’t as good as me, and has terrible taste in tag partners but that doesn’t mean you had to dump em!”

Will lecture about how you shouldn’t really trust anyone but yourself in the business, but empathizes with you (if he can) about having friends and supportive people

Like Daniel, might take this time to reflect

Will devise a revenge plan that involves sabotaging your former tag partner’s plans/goals

“Babe, I’m the devil. I can make anything happen.”

Kenny Omega

Like most people on this list, Kenny has experienced being on both sides of this situation; so he completely understands the feelings involved

Will offer you a spot in the Elite (that can go either way)

I think because of the fact that he has a lot going on with himself, he would let you do whatever you want

Is more emotional support than physical support at the moment

Will help further the storyline of your revenge and character development on BTE

Outta all the people on this list, he would give you the best advice

“I think you need to take some time for yourself and see what is in the future for you…and if the answer is revenge, make sure you have money aside for bail…for me.”

[whyse7vn]

DOWN BAD -

[ ot7 x reader ]

JOON4PRESIDENT

8 participants - 8 online

———————————

y/n: hi

tae: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

y/n: ?

tae: holy fuck ur so fucking funny😭☠️😭☠️😭☠️😭☠️😭☠️😭☠️😭☠️😭☠️😭☠️😭☠️😭☠️😭

jimin: i BEG you let that man hit

at this point it’s embarrassing

tae: pls

jk: i think ur funny too

namjoon: shame is free

tae: idk what that’s supposed to mean

jk: it means shame is free i think

y/n: is that why you’ve been at my house for the last 2 weeks??

cuz you wanna hit??

yoongi: 2 weeks??

jin: down so fucking bad

jk: i thought tae was here cuz he missed us?

tae: I AM I SWAER

but if y/n let me hit in the time i was here i wouldn’t be mad

y/n: ur sick

hobi: why have you let tae stay in ur house for 2 weeks?

y/n: he FORCED his way in here

tae: not true jungkook willingly let me in

jin: jungkooks not even a real person so that doesn’t count

jk: i’m real

i think

jimin: i’m telling you he needed that 100k for rent

yoongi: taehyung homeless era

tae: I HAVE A HOME

y/n: ur not acting like it

tae: home is where the heart is

and my hearts with you bbg

y/n: leave

jk: am i real?

tae: are you a construction worker?

jk: no

tae: cuz ur a building

namjoon: what?

tae: 😉

@y/n

not you namjoon or jungkook

y/n: it’s hard

the life i live

hobi: hard like a criminal hard like the beat

tae: my rizz is out of this world it’s actually insane

jimin: do you know what rizz means?

bcs you can’t be fr

jk: isn’t rizz a type of cheese?

yoongi: this is my competition…

y/n: ur thinking of swiss cheese kook

jk: I AM

how did you know that??

y/n: can one of you guys come a get tae from us pls im begging you

jimin: i can’t read sorry

jin: i’m literally blind

hobi: 🫣

y/n: i fear his stupidness is rubbing off on jungkook

yoongi: i think he’s just naturally dumb as hell

jk: who

yoongi: see

y/n: plS my biggest fear in this life is waking up to furry jk

tae: ummm

that would have nothing to do with my influence

yoongi: call animal control maybe they’ll help you with tae?

tae: ??????

y/n: NAMJOON PLS UR MY ONLY HOPE PLS PLS PLS

namjoon: i’m not here

tae: CAN SOMONE DEFEND ME LIKE OMG???

jUNGKOOK TELL HER HER GREAT I AM

jk: he’s great

tae: UR NO HELP FUCK U

i’m gonna kill myself in front of you all in the most horrific way and change ur lives forever and NO amount of therapy will help you forget or move on

jk: ok i’m ready

tae: i’m leaving

y/n: god bless 🙏🏽

tae: ur obsessed with me get help

i hate you all

losers

gosh

fucking bitches the LOT of you

L

AWOOOOOOO

lone wolf era

jimin: what the fuck

namjoon: are you done?

tae: yeah :/

y/n: do you feel better now??

tae: as better as i can be in a situation like this :/

hobi: what situation?

tae: wdym?

jin: he has to be brain dead or something

tae: right hoseok stupid as hell

jk: i think jimin is talking about you bro

tae: jungkook ur young i wouldn’t expect you to understand

jk: ur right

y/n: they changed the korean age system isnt that crazy

jin: DON’T TALK ABOUT AGE

jimin: it’s a sensitive topic for him cuz he’s still old no matter what

namjoon: please

jk: i’m 25

jin: IDC SHUT UP

y/n: yikes

hobi: jungkook has been 25 for like 10 years

jk: that’s not true that makes no sense

hobi are you bad at maths?

hobi: don’t speak to me

tae: jimin you smell the best in the group

y/n: why are you smelling people?

hobi: furry

tae: after the loml ofc

jk: jennie?

tae: SHUT UP

jk: did you break up again???

tae: KICK HIM KICK HIMMM

jimin: what do i smell like?

tae: like vanilla i love it soOOOO much

it’s like a sweet vanilla but not so strong it overpowers ur senses it’s just right

i could eat you

jimin: i wish bitches i wanted said shit like this

but it’s just you

thx ig

tae: ???????

jin: that’s frfr creepy as hell tbh

why is he actually sniffing people is that not insane

jimin: don’t be mad you don’t smell like sweet vanilla

jin: i’m actually glad

look at what ur attracting

hobi: furries

jin: right

tae: 𝖘𝖍𝖚𝖙 𝖙𝖍𝖊 𝖋𝖚𝖈𝖐 𝖚𝖕

jk: WOAH

CALM DOWN TAE CALM DOWN TAE ITS OKAY ITS JUST US 😰😨😭

jimin: again what the actual fuck

tae: ur right i’m sorry i didn’t mean to get like that guys

jk: it’s okay

namjoon: they’re actually insane oh my god

y/n: i have seen a real decline in jungkooks mental state since the arrival of tae at our home

yoongi: again i think that’s just jungkook

y/n: no i know jungkook

jk: yeah she knows me

i know her

we have a connection you wouldn’t understand yoongi

y/n: and i know for a FACT he’s not that dumb

hobi: dumb dumb

jk: right i’m not that dumb

tae: WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO SAY RN???

jk: wait

namjoon: tae go back to therapy

jimim: begging you

jin: awoman🙏🏻

tae: NO

I TOLD YOU LAST TIME

SHE LAUGHED AT ME

THE THERAPIST

I WONT I WONT I WONT

you can’t make me

it’s a free world

jk: you can buy the world??

yoongi: what do people see in you?

jk: whom?

y/n: LMAOOOO

namjoon: jungkook are you high rn?

jk: am i what?

namjoon: high

jk: hello

work on ur spelling joon

jimin: who tf is supplying him with this shit

jin: bet it was tae

tae: NO LOL

LOL

LOL

yoongi: so it was tae

y/n: HAVE YOU BEEN GETTING JUNGKOOK HIGH THESE LAST 2 WEEKS TAE???????

namjoon: this explains a lot

hobi: this is why he’s been messaging shit to my phone at like 2 in the morning

crazy

jk: who

tae: NO

LOL

y/n: HOW HAVE I NOT NOTICED???

jimin: right you dumb as hell tbh

namjoon: does it not smell??

jin: namjoon drug expert

tae: MAYBE HES BEEN TAKING EDIBLES

FROM SOMEONE WHEN YOU GO TO SLEEP???

LOL

yoongi: why are you giving ur self away like that

you really are stupid

jk: yeah stupid

yoongi: don’t ever agree with me again

jk: in y/ns bed rn

hobi: fight fight fight

yoongi: been there multiple times

jk: um ur lying

im here every night

i haven’t run into you in the last 4 months

tae: DONR TELL ME YOU LET JUNGKOOK HIT BEFOR ME OH MY GOD I CANT BREATHE RNNNNNNNNNNN

LIKE JUNGKOOK

ARE YOU FR .:’sk

omGGGH

NOOOSODODOD

jk: i’ve never hit a woman in my life

it’s not right pls don’t hit y/n

y/n: he comes to cuddle sometimes

yoongi: he does?

jk: everyday actually

she’s lying

jin: i’m gonna kill 14 puppies in-front of taehyung and see what happens

tae: why me

jin: you’re n need of a personality change

tae: i’m fine the way i am??

love urself and others will love you for you

we made a whole album about it?

jin: i’m not loving you for you tbh

and a LOT of people would say the same

tae: you guys are lucky i’m not sensitive

y/n: i’ve always been a lucky girly

hobi: you literally live with jungkook?

jk: yes?

hobi: nothing

jk: if you remember lmk ^^

tae: y/n do you have ugly man syndrome or something?

y/n: ??

tae: idk you just seem to enjoy being friendly with ugly men

y/n: never once have i said i’ve enjoyed ur company

tae: ARE YOU TRYING TO SAY IM THE UGLY MAN??

y/n: you said it not me…

tae: anything jungkook can do i 110% do it better

unless it’s lack common sense

i’m pretty full of common sense

jimin: that’s actually not true

y/n: maybe that’s what gets jungkook cuddles?

jk: when?

yoongi: being stupid?

y/n: yeah maybe he’s a loser and i find it endearing

yoongi: lol

hobi: me when i’m jealous

tae: IM ACTUALLY THE BIGGESt LOSER AROUND

TELL HER GUYS

namjoon: the biggest!

jimin: HE SOOOOOO DUMB ITS CRAZY

hobi: i feel the need to kick him every time i see him type of loser

jin: he’s such a loser actually i still bully him to this day

tae: not too much now

hobi: okay i can’t do this anymore let’s address the elephant in the room

jimin: namjoon…

namjoon: wtf?

y/n: don’t be mean

jk: are you guys in all in a room without me?

tae: u-um >.<

jin: did he just stutter through text?

y/n: pls stop

jk: where is the elephant??

jin: jungkook go to bed or something ur pissing me off now

jk: sleep well jin

namjoon: gn jin

jin: don’t feed into his shit namjoon

jk: y/n are you with the elephant?

yoongi: y/N aRe yOu wItH tHE eLepHaNt

jimin: what the beef omg?

tae: what is this elephant hobi-senpai ?!!!

i’m sitting on the edge of my seat

♡ (⇀ 3 ↼)

jk: me 2

hobi: tae you need to learn how to get a fucking grip and shut the fuck up

…

FYI JK AND Y/N ARE LIVING TOGETHER FOR THE FUNZIES OKAY? FOR THE GIRLIES THAT DO NOT KNOW

the rest of the members have their own houses and are lonely losers

[argentinagp]

tell me about your favourite Argentinian food!bonus points, if you include your favourite sweets!

ohhhhhhh well asado is like top tier but that´s a pretty tame answer but lets do more under the cut:

empanadas: this are probably of meat or chicken which not a fan myself... but i LOVE onion and cheese, jam and cheese, spinach

MILANESA!!!! it´s basically meat with bread all around, u can do it of chicken, fish, soy, etc. But the most common one is meat

and then... this is an argentinian creation from the pizza: fugazzetta, and it has a lot of cheese and a lot of onion

AND FOR SWEETS, u have alfajores: which i guess it can be described as two "cookies" joined together by dulce de leche!

chocotorta: which is basically chocolate cookies (called chocolinas) with a dulce de leche and cream cheese mixed together

and rogel: crispy rustic layers with lots of dulce de leche covered with a delicious Swiss meringue (description from google)

so basically this is all dulce de leche, dulce de leche, dulce de leche

ALSO, our ice cream is the best ever like for real.

[hanahaki-disease]

Till I Let You Fall

Hell or High Water - Percy Jackson/DC Crossover

Summary:

“Jason Todd. The second Robin, Tim and Percy’s Robin. Percy’s big brother was alive and had beat the shit out of him the night before in Titans tower.”

❤️✨HE HAS RISEN BABY GIRL‼️✨❤️🤪🦀

**************************************

“Summer’s next week, huh?” Tim said from the door way. Sleep still had its grip on him, it tugged his eyelids down and made his movements a bit more lethargic than usual. But last nights’ patrol had been rough and Percy thinks Tim deserves to be a bit lazy on a Wednesday morning.

Croc had decided to start the night with a bang, crawling out of his lair that was the sewers to terrorize and obtain whatever it was he wanted in the docks. They had yet to figure out what it was, but Percy knows that Tim or Bruce will have that info by the time he gets back from the orientation. Tim also had the misfortune of running into Polka Dot Man right before his patrol ended. The corrosive circles made his cape look like Swiss cheese and he had lost a shoe some how in that battle.

Percy fought really hard to contain his laughter when he came back to the cave like that. Hair sticking up and disheveled, one sock wet from the constant puddles of rain water and cave moisture, his belt in one hand and his other hand holding up his pants. Tim was a mess and Percy had the right as his brother and best friend to laugh at him.

“Actually, summer started on Monday,” Percy reread the itinerary for the orientation before shoving it into his backpack. “But yes, I go back to camp next week.”

Tim nodded his head, scratching at his belly as he did so. “What kinda shenanigans do you think you’ll get up to this time?”

“With my track history in mind,” he said. “Probably another cross country adventure. Higher chances of death this time, I know that for sure.”

“Why’s that?” Percy watched as Tim laid across his bed, across his clothes that Alfred had just finished pressing. “Did you have another prophetic dream or something?”

The younger of the two rolled the other off his clothes before grabbing his pillow and hit Tim with it. Percy chuckled at Tim’s groan when he threw it at his face. “Or something.” Tim did not look amused. “It’s…a vibe that I have, not so much as a dream. I just have this feeling that something is gonna happen this summer, not just camp, but here as well.”

“Like an invasion or takeover?” Percy shook his head. “Oh, one of us gets like, uber sick and we’re out for like a month? No, Bruce gets food poisoning when he goes on that date with Selina on Friday?”

“No, but that would be funny,” Percy leaned against his desk. “It’s more like, something happens to you specifically. Something happens and you get really hurt.”

“That’s not ominous at all,” Tim says.

“I know, which is why I’m leaving you these.” Percy pulls out a small drawstring bag from the desk drawer and tossed to him. It wasn’t any bigger than the palm of his hand and jingled when it landed. Inside was a good little pile of gold coins, roughly the size of a dollar coin and embossed on both sides.

One side had the empire state building on it, beams of light reaching out to the border making the picture seem holier than it was in real life. Circling the Empire state building on both side were Greek characters, probably a phrase of some kind. He could recognize a few letters, one was the popular ‘omega’ and another was ‘delta.’ There was also ‘psi’ but he couldn’t be quiet sure since it was a little different than the current version in the modern Greek alphabet, so Tim deduced that this was written in some kind of older version of the language.

On the other side of the coin was a small Pegasus encircled by a laurel wreath and the same Greek phrase on the edge of the coin. There was maybe, twenty of these coins in the bag. Each one having as different symbol in the laurel and the Empire State building on the other side. “What are these?”

“Gold drachmas,” Percy answered. “Currency of the gods, you can use them to call me when I’m gone.”

“You have a phone, though, can’t I just use that?”

He shook his head. “Have you ever seen me use my phone? If I try to use it, it’s basically a beacon to any and all monsters in Gotham, they’ll know I’m here and come after me. And I kinda don’t want to fight any more than I have to.”

“That’s fair. How does it work?” Tim sat up.

Percy moved to the window. The morning sunlight was bright and warm and so very different than how it usually is, but Tim didn’t mind it when he was inside. Like a cat, he could lay on the ground with a pillow and a blanket and take a nap in it’s warmth. He wouldn’t dare do it outside, though. Summer in Gotham was a humid hell and he didn’t want to be basting in his seat while he got roasted by the sun. At least inside he had the luxury of air conditioning.

Tim watched Percy’s gaze focused on the bottle of water on his nightstand. He watched as it’s contents began to spin in it’s plastic confines, swirling around in a vortex, making the bottle move as it did so. With an outstretched hand, Percy commanded it to burst from the bottle, pieces of plastic launched across the room—and in his hair—as the water floated it’s way to him.

Logically, Tim knows Percy can do this, he’s seen it before when Percy saved a baby bat that fell into the cave lake below. But he’s awestruck each time. Like his brain forgets that Percy has water powers and then remembers it all at once when he does it again. It was quite annoying.

He saw him make the water encircle his arm like a bracelet, a constant stream that so many fashion designers and celebrities alike would have killed to have. Carefully he made bits of the water stream off the main one, turning it into a fine mist that shakily made a rainbow in the sunlight. “Bring one of the drachmas and watch this.”

Sliding off the bed, Tim stood beside Percy as he took the drachma from him. “If, for whatever reason, you need to get a hold of me, this is how you do it. You make a rainbow, grab one of these, and say: O Iris, accept my offering!” He tossed the coin into the rainbow and Tim half expected to hear it clatter against the ground on the other side. But it didn’t. It wasn’t on the floor. It had simply vanished. “Then you ask her to show you who you need to talk to, for example: Show me, Grover Underwood, Camp Half-blood!”

A fuzzy image came into view and Tim audibly gasped at the sight. Grover looked exactly as he remembered him from sixth grade, from the curly hair, wispy beard on his chin and the slightly goat-like eyes. But while it was nice to see him again, Tim couldn’t help but take in the sights of the background.

Looming over the other buildings in the area, was a Colosseum. Old stone, withered by age but still kept up and cared for, it was the largest building Tim could see, with an amphitheater not too far from it either. A semi-circle of stone seats faced an unlit bonfire pit and a wooden stage. Pillars of white marble and lit braziers stood further behind the amphitheater, that was probably the pavilion Percy talked about. Where they eat their meals or have cabin meetings since there’s enough for all of them.

It wasn’t hard to spot the other campers Percy talks about, they all wore the same bright orange shirts he had and some were decked out in armor. Chest plates and shin straps, cauldrons and helmets, leather and shiny bronze that glinted in the sunlight. Each of them had a weapon on them. A sword on their hips, an ax in their hand or a spear. Though he knew they were kids like him, no older than eighteen, they held themselves like soldiers. Trained and dangerous kids who could hold their own for a good while in combat against the Amazonians. They fought like the Amazonians, Tim thought as he watched a group spar on the right side. Sand and dirt got kicked up as they moved, the plumes of their helmets shaved as they ducked, and the clash of blades and shields a constant background noise in Percy and Grover’s conversation.

“Alright, see ya G-man,” Percy swiped his hand though the image, ruining the rainbow and ending the magic video call. “You understand how it works now?”

Tim nodded. “Yeah.”

“Good,” Percy said sending the last bit of water on him towards the sink in his restroom, fist bumping the air when it landed in the porcelain bowl. “If anything happens, anything at all, let me know. I’ll drop everything and come home.”

“Yeah, no, I wont do that,” Tim said and collect the bag of coins. “You’re going to be fifteen at the end of the summer Percy, and you said it yourself that you’re basically a general in this war of yours. I won’t rip you away from that for something you don’t need to worry about. We can handle it here, you just make sure you don’t die when you’re in camp and that you come home for your birthday.”

“No promises,” Percy says and grabbed his stuff, knowing Alfred was going to call for him soon to head to orientation for his new high school. Tim followed him out to the hall, waiting beside Cassandra who paused to waive goodbye to her new little brother, “Oh! And don’t even think about looking for your birthday present in my room. I already gave it to Alfred to keep your grubby hands away from it.”

“Shucks,” Tim placed his hand on his hips and waived Percy goodbye as he left with Alfred.

Tim knows that Percy has magic dreams, he’s been told all about them after his initial introduction into Percy’s second life. Knows that they sometimes leave him shaking with a sheen of sweat, other times he looks haunted. As if the ghost of someone he once knew visited him, leaving him sullen during breakfast the next morning. Sometimes his dreams are pretty useful, a few times he’s woken up with a premonition, a fuzzy kind of gut feeling about a building or a profile on a certain case. Other times, he warns Tim not to go with Bruce on a case, to go another way on patrol, to stop or distract Stephanie from something. It isn’t clear why sometimes, since nothing happens after that, but Tim can just assume that whatever it was he saw didn’t happen.

But this time, Percy didn’t have any concrete feelings or visions. He didn’t have an inkling of where or when, of who was there and who wasn’t. Just a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach that kept Tim wary of whats to come later on.

—

Well shit.

So that’s what Percy meant when he said that Tim was going to be getting hurt.

Tim hissed in pain as he tried to reach for the handle of the drawer in the stand besides him. His right leg was in a cast, his shin was fractured and his knee was broken, as was his left wrist. The bruised ribs hurt to breath, move—exist in general, and the many cuts and bruises he got did not make anything any better.

He didn’t know what to expect in the days following Percy’s departure and the feeling of a serious injury towards him. Every day and every patrol he had spent on edge waiting for it to happen. Jumping at every person or movement in the shadow. (he felt bad every time it happened with Cass.) It got to the point that Bruce suggested that Tim takes some time away from Gotham and to head to Jump City to hang with the Titans for a bit.

Bruce.

Bruce Wayne, paranoia extraordinaire. The man who has plans for every little thing that could go wrong, told Tim that he needed some time away from Gotham. Because of Tim’s paranoia.

If Tim could laugh, he would, but his aching ribs prevented him from doing so. It also didn’t help that he was making it worse by trying to get the bag of drachmas he kept in the drawer. Normally he had them on top the stand, ready to grab in an emergency if he needed to reach out to Percy. But for some reason, he decided to tuck them into the drawer yesterday morning.

Why? He doesn’t know, he just did it, and here he was. Biting his lip in pain as he strained his good arm trying to even reach the handle. Either way, Tim has to get to those drachmas. He has to find a way to conjure a rainbow and call Percy from whatever quest he was on. This wasn’t something to put off any longer than it has been already—Jason was alive.

Jason Todd. The second Robin, Tim and Percy’s Robin. Percy’s big brother was alive and had beat the shit out of him the night before in Titans tower.

How did he come back? How long has be been alive and where has he been? So many questions had run through his head after Jason left him with an inch of his life last night. All of them needed answers, ones he doesn’t have and has no way of finding out because he was on bed rest. Which was stupid, he doesn’t need it. He’s fine.

Tim also needed to figure out where Jason was going next. He had gone on about how Batman had let another kid put on his suit, how Tim was just playing pretend in a dead kids uniform. And wow, Tim had déjà vu between the attacks from those insults since Percy had yelled them at him almost three years ago. So it was plausible for Tim to assume that Jason was heading to Gotham. He was probably going to confront Bruce or something.

And while Tim should warn Bruce of whats to come, let him know that his dead son has risen from the dead and is on a war path his way with a bullet that has his name on it. But Tim has found that he could care a little less than he should about Bruce right now. His main priority was to call his best friend to let him know that his brother was alive. After that, then maybe he’ll call Bruce.

His middle finger had just barely hooked onto the handle when the air in front of him shimmered into existence. The edges were colorful, a rainbow made of water vapor and magic, and in the middle there was a girl about his age. She had a healthy tan, much like Percy’s, and the tops of her cheeks were a bit more sun burnt than then rest of her face. Gold curls were pulled back into a ponytail letting Tim see the full intensity of her eyes.

He doesn’t think he’s ever seen some one with gray eyes like hers, storm cloud gray and a piercing stare despite the red in her sclera. Tim knows that his eyes are pretty pale compared to the darker and brighter blues and green of his family, and he has been told that his own owlish, lead-paint stare was unnerving from time to time. But Tim found himself shrinking back into his pillow under hers.

“Who are you?” He said finally before mentally cursing himself that he didn’t have a domino on.

“Are you Tim Drake?” She answered.

“Answer my question first,” Tim hardened his glare, noticing how she didn’t seem fazed at it.

“My name��s Annabeth, I’m a…” Her next words caught in her throat a little. Her gaze fluttering to her surroundings as she collected her thoughts. “I was a friend of Percy.”

Percy was never one to share personal facts about himself to those he doesn’t know or doesn’t trust. He’s seen multiple times the way Percy shuts himself off to the other kids in school, the paparazzi, or anyone he deems unsafe. When they were kids, there was no hesitation for Percy to spill his life’s story to Tim. Somehow knowing that Tim was going to be his best friend at the age of eight on that rooftop years ago. He can imagine he was the same way over there at camp.

So whoever this Annabeth was, how ever she was connected to Percy, Tim could trust her too.

“Is he okay?” Tim tried to sit up.

She gave out a shaky breath and her gray eyes welt up with tears again, he tried to not let the dread in his stomach grow. “Have you, um, have you seen the news recently?” He shook his head. “Mount St Helens erupted a week ago, we were there when it did.” The dread was growing.

“I had left to deal with another monster, and Percy stayed there as a distraction.”

No. No…This can’t—

“Percy…” She wiped a tear away. “Percy blew up the mountain. We can’t find him. We think—we believe he died, no one could survive that. There’s gonna be…” she paused for a moment. “There’s gonna be a shroud burning next Friday, I can let you into the camp if you want to come.”

Tim’s throat was dry when he tried to respond. “I thought I couldn’t go since I’m mortal?”

“A demigod can let a mortal enter with explicit permission,” she nodded her head. “If you decide to come, I can meet you at the farmers road and lead you up. You were the only one who knew about this part of Percy’s life, I think he’d want you to be here to help light the pyre.”

With that, she swiped through the rainbow screen and the magic that held the water up fell into droplets on his bed. All at once, they left a wet mark on his sheets. So then why was he still hearing water hitting the bed? It was quiet, and faint, but there nonetheless. With a hand, Tim lifted it to his cheeks and discovered they were wet.

He was crying. When did he start crying? When had Percy left on a quest, why did he go? Tim wasn’t too far away, he could’ve flown a jet or have Superboy fly him there. Tim could have helped Percy, even if he could’ve seen anything. Tim could have had Kon fly in the rumble and the surrounding area, searching though the rocks with his X-ray vision looking for him and all the other people who had been hurt by the explosion. Tim couldn’t have done anything to stop him.

This—This wasn’t how it was supposed to go. Tim was supposed to have called Percy. Wheezing from extortion, grimacing at his aching limbs and strained muscles with a smile on his face as he told Percy the news. He would seen his eyes widen, mouth drop, and maybe shed a few tears at the news. Percy would have said that he was on his way home, that he was going to pack his bag and head straight back to Gotham, but now…now…

Oh my god. Tim covered his mouth, he was going to have to tell the others.

He was going to have to be the one to tell Bruce that he lost another son to an explosion. He was going to have to tell Dick that all the bonding and reconciliation they’ve done these past two years were all for naught.

Tim was going to have to figure out a way to tell the recently revived Jason Todd that his little brother had died before he had come back to their world.

**************************************

Jason back in Gotham now >:) things are-a changing Percy’s reaction is gonna be in the next update, so stick around for that. And the dynamic between Percy and the rest of the batfam is gonna shift, quite a bit in the next arc—brace for that.

Also, this update marks the end of the second arc, I hoped you all liked it ❤️

All titles from this arc came from the song “Descending” by Sleep Token, go check them out, they’re an awesome band. Absolutely love them.

Thank you so much for reading‼️❤️

Previous | Masterlist | Next

[planet-crait]

Episode 5 we have lost the glorious intro song again. Yes I am very invested in the into sue me.

The title card reminds me of the episode where Timmy wishes to not feel any emotions. I wonder if this will be similar to that or ever brought up. I noticed Timmy hasn’t come up since episode one but with the comments about how he haunts the narrative I expect him to be referenced again just an interesting note.

Okay it’s pretty cute how excited Hazel is that excited Jasmine is coming over. First new friend excitement is such a real thing. I have to wonder though how Cosmo and Wanda know Hazel calls them. If Fairies can hear their god kids call them from anywhere how did all the fairies lose their kids in the episode where everyone looks the same?

What kind of parent lets their ten year old watch horror movies? Maybe this is more common than I realize and my shock comes from how sheltered my parents raised me it’s just weird to me. Cute again how excited Hazel is to share them but uh, I am shocked a ten year olds parent isn’t monitoring what their kids are watching.

I couldn’t help but laugh about Jasmine talking about how bad a horror movie about dolls would be. My best friend cannot handle horror around dolls because he has a doll collection so I can feel that in my soul. I’m starting to see the flags for what Hazel wishes for and why and I appreciate the setup.

Also I appreciate Jasmine setting up firm boundaries about what she is and is not okay with. Good job kiddo, it’s important to establish firmly what is and is not okay and it’s nice to see her so comfortable with that. I wonder if Jasmine has tryophobia given her hatred of Swiss cheese specifically for the holes?

Hazel I get not wanting to watch a scary movie alone. I get certain things aren’t as fun by yourself I get it. But forcing Jasmine to be that companion is not it. And why don’t Cosmo and Wanda like question this choice at all? Did they ever with Timmy? This is another one of those have to go back and check isn’t it?

Why does removing Jasmines fear make another Jasmine? When Timmy lost his emotions they manifested very differently and this Jasmine looks evil instead of being terrified like fear was in the OG. We’ll see if this gets addressed lolz. I’m glad Hazel does ask about it, even if somehow Cosmo and Wanda don’t know the answer.

Oh monster oh fuck spider. I hate spiders. I am terrified. Wait theirs a new Jasmine for each of her fears? I’m very confused.

Wait how did Cosmo and Wanda not think of this they did this before? Wouldn’t removing all emotions and a specific one do the same thing? Or is their wordplay I’m not catching any caused the difference?

Why didn’t the wish not work? Ohhh they answered that fast but why would the fears reveal how they could be defeated? Why not laugh and leave and let Hazel work it out by bouncing ideas off of Cosmo and Wanda? Thats how I personally would have rolled with it. Villains revealing their weaknesses never makes sense to me.

Lolz wait did the wish make Jasmine pass out or is class that boring? I need to know this lolz. Also adults apparently also fail to notice anything ever because no one questions why Hazel looks like a puppet. Great note taking fake Hazel. 10/10.

Wait this specific thing is in Da Rules? Like how to defeat them? I thought Da Rules just…listed wishes that couldn’t be made?

Not sure how I feel about how Hazel is going about this but I suppose desperate times desperate measures? Though Hazel is right in that Jasmine has different skill sets than a lot of kids and it’s all true. A lot of people struggle when dealing with public situations involving people and Jasmine isn’t and it’s a good strength of hers. Jasmines family sucks though for teasing her so much.

Don’t kill me internet but uh I’ve never watched or read Charlottes Web lolz.

Wait where has fear itself been this entire time? I have questions. WOW good job Cosmo little late. I didn’t think their crowns could be knocked off?

Ohhh so fear can see Hazels fears. Oh that makes sense. I do like Hazel realizing what she was doing and acknowledging it wasn’t good and deciding to pick something with Jasmine to do. Not quite how I expected it to go I think an acknowledgment about boundaries would have been good but at least Hazel realizes she shouldn’t force people to be who they’re not.

…am I forgetting an episode of FOP or is the puppet going rogue thing ever going to come up when that happened?

After sleeping on it, I realized I’m glad the writers decided to do their own thing with their variations of losing an emotion. This show shouldn’t be just Hazels versions of Timmy’s wishes, this show should be able to be its own thing. And I think the twist of the fears each manifesting as something physical to face was a fun twist.

Episode 5 I found better than 4 and 2 but not sure it beats episode 3. I think it’s a pretty close tie currently. During the work week I think these reviews will be coming out a little slower just cuz I don’t have as much time sorry about that! Onto episode 6!

[thelostdreamsthings]

Understanding the NATO summit:

The steam for the US proxy war in Ukraine is running out. No commitment is given to Ukraine to obtain NATO membership because the West has come to realize that they can’t win a war against Russia and that peace will only be possible with a neutral Ukraine.

Ukraine will never be a member of NATO. Zelenskyy has realized this and is fuming in Vilnius, attacking NATO as disrespectful and calling the conditions absurd. In a moment of clarity he acknowledged what’s really going on:

"It seems there is no readiness neither to invite Ukraine to NATO nor to make it a member of the Alliance. This means a window of opportunity is being left to bargain Ukraine’s membership in NATO in negotiations with Russia."

That’s exactly right. NATO has lost this war. Biden has lost this war. The lunatic Democrats have lost this war. The uni-party warmongers have lost this war. The EU has lost this war. Ukraine and Zelensky have lost this war.

Russia wins and rightfully so because everything that happened in Ukraine was a fraud against the Ukrainian people perpetrated by a failing US empire in its final stand against a rising multipolar world.

Zelenskyy was never a leader who did what’s best for his people. He will be remembered as a US puppet and actor for foreign interests. 350,000 Ukrainians dead because of him and his puppet masters in the US. He lost $12.7 trillion worth of land and resources to Russia because he did not sign the reasonable peace agreement that Russia had proposed to him. Instead he fell for empty promises from Biden that the US will support Ukraine until victory. What a fool.

The good news is this war may be over soon. The West has lost its appetite to throw more money into the Ukrainian black hole. With the US and EU entering recession they have enough problems at home. Protests and riots will become regular news. Biden wouldn’t stand a chance in the next election. His brain is Swiss cheese and the only alternative for the Democrats is Kennedy.

Trump will use the fatal mistake in Ukraine and the dire economic outlook of the US to run a successful campaign. Kennedy, who says all the right things, would be his only real obstacle but the Democrats have messed their country up so royally that Trump seems like the only choice.

The reality is that it doesn’t matter who the next US president is. The insurmountable debt burden combined with de-dollarization in global trade and the rise of BRICS+ are going to send the US into a decade long depression with unseen levels of poverty and violence.

Hopefully humanity dodged a bullet and nuclear war is no longer imminent. At least that is my read of the situation right now. But things could flare up again if peace negotiations fail. Russia may be tempted to take Odessa and turn Ukraine into rump state without access to the sea. Russia is holding all the cards. Let’s see how Putin plays them.

Putin’s ONLY mistake is not starting the Ukraine special military operation sooner than he did.

Zelensky is not just angry because he's short, has no friends and was rejected by NATO..

He's also angry because Putin currently controls 100,000 sq km of Ukrainian territory.

[talesfromsiteredacted]

SCP: Special Craft Projects

A list of weird requests I've had for various things on site. Some from staff, some from our residents. And one from a kitten, via his human spokesperson.

035 once asked me to do some calligraphy for him. He wanted a quote in copperplate, bright red ink. The quote? "Have you considered the possibility that it is, in fact, your fault?" To be sent to 079. Request denied on order of O5.

682 once asked me for a hat. Granted, he looked really cute with his yellow bobble hat last winter. Next winter... he gets a matching hat and scarf.

Dr. Gears asked me to do some diagrams for him... for an Indian motorcycle engine. Not my best, but they still hang in the lobby to his office.

Dr. Clef keeps asking me for a lei. Not sure if he's teasing me.

053 has a standing order for cookies once a week, for her tea parties with 682 and 999. Did not know jellybean cookies were a thing, but they are now!

Agent Strelnikof asked me to make some toys for Niko. Wound up making a few, ranging from little hacky sack things filled with cellophane to a catnip banana. The cheese pillow was a hit though, it was a block of swiss with hidden little treat pockets where the holes were. Niko sleeps on it.

Abel asked me for a crochet sheep. With a sword. Wound up creating a weirdly cute Link/sheep mix plushie.

Origami shoes. Just... how? Why? And how much of the wacky lettuce led to this one?

Hand Drawn Cassie once asked me to draw her ice skating. That was fun.

Cain asked me to crochet him a cactus. A six foot tall cactus, with flowers. Still debating on that one.

A Mario chain chomp, with chain.

Another 035 calligraphy request: "Already disturbed, just go away already!" This one I gave into. It's on the outside of his door on days he can't be bothered.

049 requested a couple of signs himself. First, a dual sided plaque with the classic Doctor is in/out, and then... Autopsy in progress, please do not disturb.

Several people have asked me to crochet scarves, hats, toys... but only Leonard "Lenny the Letch" O'Hare would ask me to make him a hooker. Denied. In fact... Clef and I laughed him right out of the boss' office on that one.

A sailboat. Full sized. How?

Two goldfish, real size. Granted, used embroidery floss.

Got asked to draw a few NSFW things of certain anomalies. Denied. First... 076-2 and 073 are my brothers. Iris is my sister. Not biologically, but that is a line I do not cross. Second... not my style. Third... Abel doesn't like you, Karin. At all.

Dr. Iceberg asked me to bake him a pecan pie once. Not all that weird, but Iceberg doesn't really ask for a lot, or often. He said it was almost as good as his mom's. I call that high praise indeed.

Since Clef found out I can cook, I get weekly requests for cheesecake. I'm running out of recipes! Another unexpected hit: lemon cake.

343 asked me to make him a door sign. Nothing fancy, just "Please wipe your feet". Granted.

Geoff, one of our elevator guys, asked me to crochet him a mini Chris Redfield. Gave him a matched set of Redfields, after all can't break up siblings, right?

A Tetris themed afghan, for Agent Markovich. Iris wanted a surprise for his birthday. That was a fun challenge.

Used to muck about making my own dice for RPGs. I had to stop due to getting headaches. That... and the last dice I made, an eyebleeding neon tie dye nightmare set for Dr. Bright. Never. Again.

Dr. Glass asked me for some ink blots, like the psych test ones. He also asked me to do some garden landscapes for him. Both are framed, landscapes in the lobby. The ink blots are at his apartment.

Clown shoes. Nope, I do not think so.

Golf clubs. Not kidding. Had to say no on that one.

A life size version of 999. I'm thinking about it. Maybe as Evie's Yule gift this year.

Origami grenades. How are those even supposed to work, Clef?

A cape. Hey, anything you need, Cactus Man.

A ball gag. Yes, for Dr. Bright. Denied. Just order from Adam & Eve, Dr. Rights! Or... 100 mph tape.

Shotgun cozies. Didn't even know such things existed.

Wizard's hat, blue velvet, with hidden pockets. Eobard, my man... those things never stay on, plus I am not a hatmaker! What's wrong with a hood?

106 asked me for a skeleton once. It's almost done, just gotta assemble Mr. Squishybones. Once I figure out how.

A mini version of 682. Yes, it was for 053, Evie. She sleeps with it.

A voodoo doll of Dr. Gears. Not for pins, though... 166 wanted to hug it, so maybe he'd cheer up a little. Clef thought it was cute, granted. No signs it's working yet though.

Voodoo doll of Dr. Clef. I did make one, but since it was intended for bad purposes... that went to 166 too. Clef has been less edgy since, so maybe it works?

Mikell Bright once asked me to make a few pieces of jewelry for him. Nothing fancy, just a chainmaille bracelet for Claire and a necklace for one of his lady companions. Took me a few weeks, but in the end it was good enough. The damn bracelet was worse, that was supposed to be almost like a bracer. I no longer do chainmaille.

035 asked for a bubblegum pink crochet bikini. Managed to talk him out of it. Dr. Gears thanked me for that. Weird Thursday, but that's the Foundation for you.

A cup of coffee. With googly eyes. Dr. Glass has him on his bookcase in his office, calls him Dr. Java. Cute, but also good for getting younger patients to open up.

And finally... yet another rejected Karin Moritana request: photorealistic nude blanket of Abel. Nope. Nope. Nope. That is a giant nope, and yes... I did make her go see Dr. Glass about her obsession with my brother. Clearly, homegirl needs help.

[rabbitcruiser]

National Pickle Day 

National Pickle Day is on November 14 and it was created to celebrate the pickle as one of the worlds favorite fermented foods. Pickles prove to be preposterously popular with people across the country; the number of pickle-eaters is projected to proliferate to more than 250 million by 2023. That gives plenty of pretext to position November 14th as prime pickle time!

History of National Pickle Day

The practice of pickling has existed for thousands of years. The process ensured a degree of preservation otherwise impossible in pre-modern conditions and was essential in providing a mobile supply of provisions for travelers as well as a dependable source of nutrition for those living through barren winters. While a diverse set of foods can be pickled, the cucumber emerges as the dominant food that most associate with the idea of both pickling and the word “pickle” itself. Archaeologists believe that the first evidence of pickled cucumbers originates from Tigris river valley civilizations, and the nutritional benefits of the food would go on to be lauded by such historical figures as Cleopatra and Julius Caesar. 

With all their popularity in the Old World, pickles would not make their appearance in North America until 1492. As you may have guessed by the year, the one responsible for their introduction was none other than Christopher Columbus. Pickles were included in sailors’ rations on his expeditions as a means by which to prevent the onset of scurvy. By the mid-17th century, cucumbers bought from Dutch settlers farming in the New York area were pickled and distributed throughout the region. This would lay the foundations for the territory to be the perfect site for the introduction of the kosher dill pickle. 

In the period of the late 1800’s and early 1900’s, a large number of Eastern European Jews immigrated to the United States and settled in the New York City area. They brought with them the unique methods that produce kosher dill pickles, and these early iterations of pickles would develop into the now-famous and ever-familiar food available in grocery stores throughout the United States.

National Pickle Day timeline

2030 B.C.

A Pickle Provenance

Mesopotamians pickle cucumbers native to India and give birth to one of the great staples of food condiments.

10th Century

A Pickle Pairing

Dill, a central ingredient in many brine mixtures used to culture cucumbers, arrives in Western Europe from Sumatra.

1940’s

A Pickle Portion

The United States government produces 40% of U.S. pickle output as they include pickles in rations for the armed forces.

2001

A Pickle Party

The first annual National Pickle Day celebrations take place in New York City.

Fun Stats About Pickles

A pickle in every home

More than 67% of all households eat pickles. American households in particular purchase pickles every 53 days!

America’s pickled angel

Americans consume more than 9 pounds of pickles per person annually. To give context, the average cucumber weighs about 0.8 pounds. 

A whole lotta acres

100,000 to 125,000 American acres are specifically devoted to growing pickling cucumbers and they’re grown in more than 30 states.

National Pickle Day FAQs

Is there a national pickle shortage?

Without raising too much alarm, there is a strain of mildew that has been particularly harmful to cucumber crops in the United States. However, researchers are working to develop a variety of mildew-resistant cucumbers, which would secure the future of the pre-pickle plant. 

What is the pickle capital of the world?

It’s up for debate! St. Charles, Illinois, the original home of the pickle-centric marketing company Pickle Packers International, held the title for more than four decades. However, the organization has since relocated to Washington, D.C., leaving this particular question open. 

What state makes the most pickles?

Michigan grows the most pickles.

National Pickle Day Activities

Break a Record: Got an appetite for pickles? Test your limits and see if you can break the world record for pickle consumption. The current holder of the throne gobbled up more than five-and-a-half pounds of pickles ... in six minutes. Good luck!

Envision Your Own Variety: Just because the technique has been around for thousands of years doesn’t mean that it’s been perfected… right? There are limitless possibilities as to how you can go about making pickles. Maybe it’s time for you to concoct your own formula and show the world what you (and your pickles) are made of!

Try 'Em All!: If you don’t want to stuff yourself silly with a peck of pickles, and you’re not inclined to brine your own cucumbers, consider sampling different kinds of pickles to discover which style is your favorite - from bread and butter, to sweet, to classic kosher dill, there are plenty of ways to enjoy this salty snack!

Why We Love National Pickle Day

Pickles Are Versatile: Although many choose to eat them on their own, pickles can be enjoyed fried, in a sandwich, in a dip, in a salad, among other ways.

Pickles Aid Athletes: Some may pucker at the idea of it, but drinking pickle juice can help athletes reduce the likelihood of experiencing cramps after intense exercise.

Pickles Have Probiotics: Pickles fermented in non-vinegar brine solutions carry with them probiotic microorganisms that provide a whole host of health benefits.

Source

[scumtrout]

Re: that post I reblogged about informal support networks, that's something I've been musing over for a while: informal support networks are not a given. It's possible for you to build a network containing the most helpful people imaginable and still somehow find yourself up shit creek without a paddle.

I know the whole point of networks is that if one node 'fails', other nodes are meant to act as backup... But the Swiss Cheese model of accident causation is a very real problem, and also when the nodes in your network are human beings, each one will have its own unique range of strengths and weaknesses, so that sometimes the only person who can help you with a particular problem at a particular time is unavailable.

I remember seeing people argue online that you should build relationships with people mainly because you might need their help with something eventually, and... yikes. Not only does that seem mercenary, but the person who you're 'investing' in because you expect some sort of return might have moved to somewhere far away or changed jobs by the time you expect them to help you. Relationships are impermanent, and people have their own lives. If your life comes into alignment with someone else's and you can mutually help each other, then that's great, but that's not something you can take for granted.

There's also the following issue: sometimes the people who are quickest to offer help are not the best candidates for providing help. But that's a separate kettle of fish.

[thebeckster]

(Hiii this is Ben but it won’t let me ask from my sideblog): for the reverse trope prompt: asafure and the rival academics pls?

(Oh my god, we're gonna pretend like I answered this ask last month when I actually wrote the prompt and it didn't just fall through one of the swiss cheese holes in my brain)

Anyways.

Thank you so much for the prompt! Writing Arthur/Frey is just so much fun, and any time I can toss them into an AU is a treat. I hope you like it too!

💜💜💜

To the people who did not know any better, who only knew Frey and Arthur in a professional setting, it would only be right for them to assume that the two hated each other. They were bitter rivals. The school’s two eighth-grade teachers, constantly in competition with one another. Outside of school, they were the happiest couple anyone could have known. They rarely argued, they were romantic-movie levels of sweet to each other, and when they were on a team together at game night with friends, they were unbeatable. For people who knew Arthur and Frey both outside of school and at school, it was like watching someone lead a double life. The two would drive into work together, matching coffee cups, sometimes even coordinating outfits. They’d chat brightly with each other and their colleagues about various goings on around the school – which students were struggling, which ones were excelling, how test scores were stacking up. But then as soon as the bell rang, and students filed into their homeroom for the morning, suddenly they were warring generals, directing their students into pitched battles against the other homeroom. All day the rivalry would rage against each other. And then once the last bell rang for the day and the students went home, Frey and Arthur were back to their sweet, loving selves. Only to repeat the cycle the next day. During the lead up to exam time, it would not be an exaggeration to call their days of teaching a bloodbath.

Frey and Arthur had at some point reached the conclusion that to get their students most prepared for high school and engaged in their academics was to pit them against their fellow classmates in a year-long competition to see who was crowned the Best Class at the end of the year. Who had better test scores, who had the most improved grades, who read more books, who participated in more extra curriculars, who did more volunteer service.

Anything that would otherwise spark little more than disinterest and apathy from 12-14 year-olds suddenly became some of the most important aspects of their school year.

The administration thought about stepping in once or twice when rumors of what was going on got blown out of proportion, but they couldn’t argue with the results. The school’s eighth-graders scored consistently higher than their peers across the district and continued to do exceptionally well through high school.

It was an odd method, one most of their colleagues did not understand, but it worked for all parties involved.

Sometimes people were a bit confused over whether the fierce competition was contrived, and just an act the teachers put on for the students. But the infamous Maternity Leave Incident from a few years back had illuminated some things. Whatever rivalry the two teachers had was very real. At least between the hours of 7:30AM to 4:00PM, Monday thru Friday.

It was the first day of school. Frey always loved the first day of school. A new semester, a new crop of students (some of which she knew were eager to be in her class), and a whole new year to prove to her husband that she was the better teacher. Her class had been the winner for three years running and she wasn’t about to break that streak.

(And really it would have been four years if she hadn’t had to miss a significant portion of the school year going out on maternity leave. Sure, Arthur was out for almost as long as she had been, but those extra two weeks he got with his students had made all the difference that year. Frey’s substitute just hadn’t been up to the task.)

She leaned against her desk, sipping at her coffee as she smiled at the shiny gold plastic trophy that sat atop a bookshelf in the place of honor. A construction paper banner was spread across the wall behind it, a victory flag of sorts, listing out the years her class had won the trophy. She knew Arthur had a very similar set up in his classroom across the hall.

Her husband crossed the currently empty hallway and sidled up next to her on the desk, with his own cup of coffee in hand. He followed her gaze up to the trophy. “Another year, another run for the prize. Looks good up there, but it would look better on my shelves.”

Frey fought a smile, not giving him the satisfaction of a retort. “Darling, you don’t think it’s looking a little dull, do you?” She faked a frown and cocked her head at the gleaming trophy (which she had just dusted not five minutes ago). “I worry that since it hasn’t been moved in so long, it might be collecting dust up there. I mean, there’s an inch of dust atop your bookshelf, I can only imagine the trophy has collected just as much while it’s been on mine.”

“Well, if you don’t want such a dingy old thing tarnishing your impeccable room, I’ll take it off your hands.” He spared a glance around to see what decorations Frey had put up for the first quarter. She’s chosen a pastoral theme, gentle greens and blues with landscapes of crop fields and pastures of animals scattered around. Nothing like what he’d chosen for his room. “Hmm… farms. How quaint.”

“You do recall our first combined unit it about agriculture? From sciences through the arts we’re going to the farm. It will help the students stay in the right mindset and focus on their tasks.”

“They’re going to fall asleep counting sheep.” Arthur teased. “You’ve got enough of them bouncing along the walls. Look. One… two… three…” and here he faked a huge yawn.

Frey scoffed and pushed him off her desk. “Even sleeping, my class would do better than yours.”

“That’s what you think. We’ll just have to see where the score falls at the end of the semester, won’t we?” And the fire of competition blazed in Arthur’s eyes. “I think come winter term, that trophy is going to come back to its proper home in my room.”

“I’ll take that bet.” Frey leaned forward, her eyes ablaze with the same fire.

She planted a kiss on her husband’s smiling lips just as the first bell of the day rang. Distantly they heard the school doors open, the tromp of many feet in the hall, and the cacophony of student voices. The two parted and Arthur raised his mug in a toast.

“To another school year, my love. May the best class win.” Frey clinked her coffee cup against his and said with a confident smile, “Don’t worry, we will.”

[rissararity]

Keep My Secret - Stucky/OC

By RissaRarity

👉🏻Chapter word count: 3798

(NSFW, unprotected P/V sex, poly undertones)

These chapters aren't nesacarily in order so please roll with it. It doesn't really matter for what this story is.

Fic masterlist:

CHAPTER TWO: GETTING A SIGNAL (Bucky + Prism)

It was one of the rare occasions where Prism and Bucky were sent on a mission together. Of course, things went haywire and they found themselves deep underground in the enemies base.

After the big fight, the enemy decided to just level the entire place- resulting in them being trapped while the enemy agents escaped.

Most of them at least.

They'd managed to reprogram some of the Ultron Era robots to patrol the lower levels and they were the current problem.

With the building literally collapsed into a pile of rubble on top of them, the Avenger pair were trapped with the enemy.

Just before the base had been blown, one of the agents had managed to inject Bucky with something that seemed to temporarily weaken the effects of the serum- inhibiting his ability to heal quickly.

Prism and Bucky wound up separated for a while until she rounded the corner just in time to see one of the repurposed robots make his torso into Swiss cheese.

"Bucky!" she bolted over to his collapsed form, beheading the bot with one swipe of her magic, it's body fell to the floor loudly.

Blood poured from at least seven holes, his eyes grew hazy as she dropped to her knees beside him. "I've got you, I'm gonna get you out of this." She swore, trying to hide her panic.

More robotic footsteps could be heard coming closer. "I've got to get us somewhere they won't see us. Hang on, Buck. If you die on me....I'll kill you."

He grinned a little, grunting in pain as she grabbed under his arms and pulled him into the closest room. A trail of blood followed them as she got him into the dark, musty control room. She gritted her teeth as she dragged him to a clear spot on the ground.

Honestly, she wasn't sure if her magic could do this but considering it seemed to do almost whatever she needed, she decided to try.

"Stay awake, Buck. I'm gonna get you out of this." She gulped and met his eyes briefly before sending her magic to her hands- white and pastel light cast an ethereal glow over her features that entranced him in his slightly delirious state.

Bucky watched in awe as she put her glowing hands over his torso, closing her eyes in concentration. He gave a shaky exhale in relief as his pain stopped for the moment and her magic encased his entire torso.

"I can feel the inhibitor they injected you with. I'm trying to help you metabolize it...and help with your major injuries. It's bad, I'm not gonna lie." She knit her brows in concentration, a stream of blood slid from one side of her nose as she worked- a sign of her efforts.

Not that she had any idea, but her partner watched her the entire time unable to look away. It was slow, hard work and after an hour or so of constant effort her magic began to flicker out.

"...Come on..." she tried to force more magic but her nosebleed only dropped from the other nostril as well as she got progressively more light headed.

"Take a break, Priz. You're about to pass out."

"But...but...UGH!" She growled in annoyance as her magic went out like someone had flipped the off switch.

He couldn't help his grimace as his pain returned. Life threatening injuries were taken care of but he was still hurt, weak and bleeding.

"I'll have to use natures magic." She resigned, wiping her nose on her arm that sported a few scrapes and bruises of her own.

"You're gonna cuddle with me?" He asked, arching an eyebrow.

"It's that or you die down here- and I won't let that happen. I'll try to heal you again when my magic comes back, but right now this is the best I can do for you. I'm sorry if the idea is repulsive but..." she grunted as she sat him up a bit and dragged him over toward a support pillar.

"No man left behind. I'm gonna get you out of here alive, Buck, or die trying." She promised, rendering him speechless as he gained a new respect for her.

She managed to slide between his back and the concrete, getting him to lay against her torso, between her legs. Her arms wrapped around him as she rested her cheek on the top of his head.

Bucky was unable to move thanks to a paralytic in the inhibitor, so he had to let himself rest against her. Admittedly, her boobs made nice pillows on either side of the back of his head.

He told her as much, getting a growl in response that made him smirk.

"I think in light of our current situation..." he waited for the pain from being moved to subside a bit, "We should call for a temporary truce. I don't think we should die fighting each other."

She sighed, "Deal. I'm too tired to be angry with you anymore. I don't think I could come up with a sarcastic comment if I tried."

She tired to use her ear piece to call for help but got no response.

"Coms are down and there's no way we're going to get a signal down here through all the rubble." Prism frowned, brow creasing as she had used a lot of her magic to slowly help her partners body fight the chemical he'd been injected with. "My magic is running on empty trying to keep you afloat. Honestly, I'm open to suggestions." She tried to heal him again, flinching as she felt a stab in her gut as her magic began to drain her.

Bucky was quiet for a moment as the thought, eyes trained on her hands that glowed with silver and pastel light against his blood stained tactical vest.

"I know how we can get a beacon to Steve, but you're not gonna like it."

"I think we've established the life and death situation were in, with our temporary truce in affect...just tell me."

He licked his dry lips, "I know you don't have much knowledge on what it's like to have a mate," he began.

"Not now, Barnes." She sighed, flinching as she felt another stab that sent liquid up her throat. She leaned to the side and coughed up some blood, wiping her mouth on her shoulder.

The beta frowned down at the spot on the floor for a moment, "Let me finish! And take a break, before both of us are defenseless. I'm not gonna die if you stop for a while."

After a moment of hesitation, she relented and let her hands stop glowing. He clenched his jaw a little as his pain returned but didn't make an audible sound.

"We're too far apart for mate telepathy, so the only way I can get a signal to him is if our bond detects infidelity."

He heard her breath catch, and felt the rise and fall of her chest speed up.

"Y-you mean..."

"We're both betas, so there's no risk to you. Once I cum from someone else our bond will lead him right to us like a bloodhound."

She was silent.

"I told you you wouldn't like it. Well...maybe you will, I'm sure no one's been that close to you i-" "Truce, asshole. Remember?"

"Right. Sorry." He cleared his throat.

"Besides, I'm surprised you're even suggesting it. I always thought you hated me."

He scoffed, "Now I know you don't have much experience with men. I don't have to like you personally to want to fuck you, Doll. Been a long time since I had a gal anyway- though I'm not exactly in my best shape to preform so you'll have to take the lead."

Prism's face couldn't get any more pink, heart hammering nervously in her chest.

"You're messing with me."

"Normally Id jump at the chance but not in this case. Either we do this so Steve can find us or we die down here."

She was quiet again, "When we get home, we never speak of this again and you can't hold it against me...ever."

His chuckle ended in a cough, "Make me bargin for both our lives why don't ya?" he coughed a little more, flinching in pain and noticing her rub his chest soothingly as a reflex.

"You have my word, Priz." He said at last.

With a resigned sigh, she carefully slid out from behind him and he was able to sit up long enough to scoot back and put his back against the wall.

She stepped in front of him, looking shy. "I'm not getting naked."

"Don't have to. Just from the waist down then sit in my lap."

With a small gulp, she began to undo the pants of her suit - aware of him grunting in discomfort as he tugged his down to his knees while leaving his underwear up.

The mage could already see the thick outline of his already half hard member, making warmth spread through her body in a way she'd been purposely avoiding for years.

Luckily, Bruce had just given her a dose of her industrial strength suppressants the day before the mission so her omega pheromones were undetectable.

Of course, Bucky could still scent the smell of her slick as soon as it began. He did her the courtesy of sparing her of that information in the name of their temporary cease-fire.

Deep down it stoked his ego to know a gorgeous woman - even if it was Priz- found him attractive enough to start getting wet for him before they even had any physical contact.

In fact, he said nothing at all as she placed herself in his lap facing him as her now bare crotch landed perfectly on his clothed one.

"This is the tricky part. You need to make sure you don't hurt yourself here. I can't move very much so...you're gonna have to do most of the prep...and work."

He smirked a little as her eyes flicked up and down his body for a moment. "I'm not really a...top kind of beta so-"

He chuckled, "Yeah, no shit."

"What's that supposed to mean, Barnes?" she hissed, but rolled her hips to his anyway.

A small grunt came from his lips as his hands lifted from his sides to grasp her bare waist and guide her a little.

"I know you've got a mouth on you and you're a scrappy little beta, I'll give you that..." his grip tightened to push her down a little harder, earning a small whimper from her. "You are clearly a bottom leaning one too, all the alphas can tell."

While Bucky was technically a beta, the part of him that was The Winter Soldier had been made into an Alpha that now lived in the back of his mind. He could be every bit an Alpha as Steve or anyone else.

Knowing that made her wet on an instinctual level.

"H-how can you tell? Wait...all of you?!" she tensed up hips stopping for a moment as blood rushed to her cheeks. "Has this been a topic of discussion?!"

He tilted his head with a grin and said nothing for a long moment. "All alphas are secretly horn dogs, I'm positive nearly every alpha you've ever met has fantasized about you at least once or thought about what you're like in bed. You're a brat, Priz, but that just means you need a firmer hand. With the right partner, I bet you cant help being a compliant, good girl." His large hands slid down to paw at her thighs, spreading them a little and making her lower lips slip against each other - earning a shutter and shaky breath.

Prism blushed, thankful again for her suppressants as she'd have otherwise dripped at the thought of being so wanted. "Scentless doesn't mean unfuckable, I guess."

Bucky's hands encouraged her to move against his hardness again, "It certainly does not." Amusement laced his tone. "But that's not how I know." He went on, watching her eyes glaze a little with lust as the heavy smell of her arousal became apparent.

"How then?" she asked, gasping when his flesh hand suddenly grabbed her throat and gave a controlled squeeze that made her eyes flutter and hips speed up, a shuttery gasp sliding from her lips.

"Because even when you're on top, you want me to dom you. I've been doing it almost the entire time and you immediately accepted it- melted into it is more accurate. So tell me, Doll," She felt the air shift as he began to put out Alpha pheromones. "How do I make you...open up to me? What makes you want to shut that pretty mouth and be a good girl for Alpha?" his voice dropped an octave, blue eyes glinting with arrogance and lust.

Her brows creased as his praise went straight to her core, panting slightly.

Unable to deny what she wanted, Prism took his flesh hand and made him cup her jaw, pressing to tell him to squeeze. He smirked and did as instructed, "You want alpha to kiss you?"

She frowned a little as she remembered his mate back at the tower and guilt pricked at her.

"Don't worry about Steve, sweetheart. The goal here is to upset the mating bond and commit infidelity. I have to fuck you to get us rescued...kissing you is nothing by comparison." His tone got softer for a moment, thumb grazing her lips and squishing the lower one a little to admire how soft and full it was.

His words worked, getting a nod of consent. Seizing her jaw again, he pulled her face down to his and claimed her lips in a domineering kiss that made her groan against his.

Keeping in mind how common it was for betas to have casual sex with each other, though usually unmated ones, the beauty took his metal hand and slid it around her to grip her ass.

Prism gripped his hair as she kissed him back, careful to avoid the wounds on his torso. His growl made her hands drop immediately, he let her pull back from him and their breath mingled in the air.

"See? I'm a top leaning beta, you can sense that and you just submitted to me again because you know I will win this fight- even all fucked up like this." He slid his flesh hand up and down her waist, memorizing the feel of her soft, feminine form.

"Someone's cocky." She grinned, silver eyes meeting his blue ones.

"You'll become better acquainted with my cockiness soon enough, doll."

They shared a small, genuine laugh before he winked.

"I'm gonna do my thing and feel free to hop on when you feel ready to be a good girl and help me get us out of here." He said against her lips before kissing her cheek, behind her ear and then down her neck- hand creeping up to tug at her hair.

"F-fuck." She groaned, head falling to the side for him as his alpha pheromones flooded her.

"That's the plan." He breathed against her skin, letting his prickly stubble scratch her. She moaned as he sucked on the spot where her neck and shoulder met, "You're so wet for me." He murmured as she reached down and freed him from his jockeys, hiding her surprise at its size and weight in her hand.

Bucky groaned as she stroked him a few times before lifting herself to rub his head against her opening. His head fell back, eyes rolling in pleasure as she stretched herself over him and sank down - easily taking him to the hilt resulting in a buldge in her lower belly.

"Mmmm!" she rested her forehead against his as she sat still for a moment before starting to ride him.

"God, you're a natural." He groaned, both hands now kneading her ass while watching her body swallow him like it was made for him specifically.

Pride bloomed in her chest as she soon reduced him to a groaning, sweaty mess under her while he continued to grope her where he could - part of her wishing she'd taken her top off.

With a burst of confidence, she leaned toward his face and changed her angle a little so he reached deeper, making a string of curses fall from his lips.

"Gonna come for me soldier? Fill me up with your cum?"

He regarded her through heavily lidded eyes, "You gotta earn it, baby doll. Ride that cock and earn alphas load." One hand reached back up to grip her throat as he buried his nose in her neck, grunting as his metal hand grabbed her hips and forced her to move faster

Her little body bounced above him, messy hair floating slightly each time she speared herself again. "My little Angel wants alphas cum, huh?" He made sure to brush his stubble on her sensitive skin again. "If I could move I'd show you what I can do and you wouldn't walk right for a week." His voice was dripping with lust, face contorting when her body squeezed him at his words.

"You like that, Princess? You like when alpha talks dirty? 'm gonna fill you up so much you're gonna inflate like a balloon, sloshing with every step as my cum slides down your legs."

"...alpha..." she whimpered, squeezing him again.

"Cum on my cock, doll. Be a good girl and earn your prize." His voice was tight as he reached the edge.

With a moan of pleasure that could put a porn star to shame, she threw her head back as her body pulled him in close to press his head against her cervix.

"F-fuuuccck!" he groaned, hands pulling her down roughly as he shot a massive load deep into her- sure enough- causing her to inflate a bit to accommodate it. She could feel each long, hot burst as he made good on his promise.

Almost as soon as his body relaxed under her, he felt a squeeze in his chest that told him Steve had pin pointed them through the bond.

"Did it work?" she panted, legs shaking as they still rested on his thighs.

Bucky nodded, "He knows. He's on the way."

"Good." She went to stand up but froze when he grabbed her arm, eyeing him suspiciously. "One last kiss for the road?"

She snickered, "In your dreams, Barnes."

With a crooked smirk, he let go and watched his dick fall out of her as she stood up, yelping slightly as she stood to the side to let the thick stream of white drain from her belly and onto the floor.

"Shit, you weren't kidding." She tried to squeeze out what she could, using a scrap piece of cloth from the rubble to wipe the mess off her legs.

Bucky put himself away and pulled his pants up with minor difficulty. "I forgot how good pussy is." He shrugged, secretly proud of how much he'd managed to give her. "Best I've ever had, at least of what I remember."

He didn't know the real reason hers was so good, but she did - a small badge of pride she tucked away. "Well...thanks?" she glanced at him while she put her pants back on, receiving a wink.

She helped him lean forward and scooted to her previous position: him laying between her legs, his back to her chest, neck cradled between her breasts, her arms around his waist near his wounds.

"I'm gonna try again, okay?"

" 'ppreciate it."

She rested her cheek on the top of his head and closed her eyes as her hands began to glow again, making his body relax further as her magic fought the toxin inside of him and began to help close more of the wounds.

Prism kept going with the slow and difficult process until she was hit with exhaustion and her magic flickered out.

By then, her teammate had fallen asleep under her touch so she allowed herself to follow.

That was how The Captain found them hours later after Tony helped him clear enough of the rubble to get down there.

Steve couldn't help the small smile that crossed his face when he saw them like that. If things were different, they'd be a cute couple.

-

Prism begrudgingly sat in the alpha's lap while the Quinjet's autopilot took them home.

Bucky sat in the passengers seat with an open paper back covering his eyes, head tipped back.

"Oh, and the next time you wanna take Buck for a ride, let me know ahead of time so I can watch. He is my mate after all."

She glared up at his smirk, cheeks ablaze. "You know it was the only way."

"I know, and I'm not mad. Betas fuck all the time." Amusement twinkled in his baby blues.

"Steve!" she growled, eyes tearing with embarrassment.

"What? Beta on beta can be hot! Plus, he could-" "and would!" Bucky added from his seat, not moving from his position.

The blonde chuckled a little, turning his attention back to the female and continued, "right, and would, Alpha for you properly if that's what you wanted. All you gotta to is ask to borrow him, and give me a front row seat."

"How do you know I wouldn't dom him?"

Bucky snickered in his seat and Steve openly began to laugh.

She began to sulk, a dark cloud over her head as her cheeks burned.

"You did save his life though so...you can have one free-bee without supervision." Steve said quietly, resting his cheek on the top of her head

"Gee thanks." She rolled her eyes but accepted the physical contact that was already helping with her soreness and exhaustion.

He chuckled, a crooked grin she couldn't see on his lips. "I'm serious. But also, thank you for bringing my mate back to me. I'd be a mess without him."

Prism had never heard him sound so sincere, least of all while speaking to her. She knew he'd probably hate her forever and possibly even kill her if she failed or let Bucky die...but that wasn't why she did it.

"I couldn't leave him. We may not always get along but...we're teammates. I'd do the same for you." She replied softly.

Now it was the alpha's turn to be rendered speechless for a moment. "I know you would."

Liar.

She couldn't help but scoff, making him glare down at her for a moment- mildly embarrassed he'd been caught.

Neither of them brought it up again. Instead, he began to rub her back and made an effort to exude more alpha pheromones to help her.

Soon, she fell asleep, her cheek on his collar bone.

[auncyen]

Realizing I could have made a joke at a really dramatic moment in this chapter and not sure if I regret missing the joke or am glad because it...may not have been appropriate

Malaya telling Castti "Remember" in ch. 4 and Castti being like 'The problem is she’s trying to create an entirely new concoction, one she’s never seen before.' and it would have been SO easy to tack on 'ALSO, SHE HAS AMNESIA' lmfao

it's probably for the best I missed it. But also I'm just going to imagine Castti being like that during the canon moment for real like "Malaya you know my memory is swiss cheese. Malaya please. Please."

[codydbuni-blog]

Bugsnax headcanon: If grumpuses are jet pilots

After playing Ace Combat series for a long time, I was thinking of a headcanon of which aircrafts the grumpuses would be manning. FYI Those who are absent wouldn’t be willing to be a a pilot due to several reasons. Endgame spoilers warning!

Filbo: He would be pretty much a YH equivalent to PJ (Crow 3) from Ace Combat Zero: The Belkan War, as he’ll show up in a F-16C “Fighting Falcon” (multirole). However, despite the aircraft’s well-rounded capabilities, it doesn’t really help much considering Filbo would pass out from g-LOC. Or worse, feel nauseous while piloting. He’s better off as an WSO (weapon systems officer) while the Journalist does the job for him.

Wambus: F-4 Phantom II. Despite being an old multirole fighter (like the pilot as he’s hitting 50′s and his body is no longer able to withstand such high amount of g-force), it makes up for its payload and great range while performing well for air superiority and taking down ground targets. By any chance, Triffany would be his WSO (kinda like Monarch and Prez from Project Wingman).

Chandlo: For someone who want an attacker that withstands lots of punishment while causing the most damage as possible, he’ll look no further as the A-10 Thunderbolt II (albeit modified into a 2-seater) is ready to suppress ground forces while turning them into swiss cheese thanks to its gatling gun. The only downside, however, is the mobility at higher altitudes as it kinda handles like a boat with wings. Thankfully, it comes equipped with reinforced armor to compensate the shortcomings. As usual, Snorpy will be his WSO, especially due to the latter being prone to anxiety when piloting an aircraft even if he’s good at it.

Elizabert and Eggabell: SU-47 “Berkut” and SU-37 “Terminator”. Fittingly, they’ll be pretty much a dead ringer to AC6′s “Garuda Team” in addition to working together to take down targets: Either confusing the enemy by flying in synchronization or one of them acting as a bait while the other would pursue the target. Like “Gelb Team” from AC0, they’re equipped with specialized missiles that are fired backwards while sending them a lethal “No U”. Y’all may wonder how the hell did Liz got her paws on a prototype with forward-swept wings (presumably a fully-functional replica since only one real-life SU-47 was ever made before the actual project was cancelled). While Eggabell ain’t the sharpest tool in the shed, she’ll do the best to keep up with Liz as long the latter’s aircraft doesn’t let her down.

By the way, as a nod to the endgame, they’ll be known under the squadron name “Hydra Team”.

Alegander: Surprise, surprise! Considering his organization’s secrets were being revealed by the Journalist, the events have led him to snap to the point of becoming obsessed in taking down the latter (totally not a poor man’s equivalent of Project Wingman’s Crimson 1). In a similar vein to Anderi “Akula" Markov from AC: Assault Horizon (minus the game’s heavy scripting and plot armor), he’ll whip out a heavily refurbished SU-57 “Felon”. A cutting-edge stealth fighter which has excellent firepower, maneuverability, defense, speed and “quick maneuver air-to-air missiles” that will put a hell of a fight against any target. However, due to his age he can’t handle a such high amount of g-force while suffering from “greyout” when pushing his aircraft too hard.

“Yo Snorp-dawg, (you) still alive?”