#re: will u mask forever

[pandemic-info]

Never believe minimizers who lie and say there’s nothing more we can do to mitigate the spread of COVID. Scientists are working on better vaccines, masks, clean air tools, treatments, and tests that could all be game-changers. What we lack is the political will.

(1) Dr. Lucky Tran on Twitter

[freestyle-crocodile-trashpile]

can I request a m!reader with Task Force 141, (feel free to add any other group if you w) very angsty…..I NEEF THE ANGST OK???? PLS

the m!reader gets placed into the 141, just being a very joyful and playfully sarcastic person all around that everyone can get along with well. M!reader suffers from depression and is very good at masking it, putting up a really strong facade and front. He is pretty introverted and extroverted, he can be very active but also clammy and avoidant at times when he is asked personal questions, deflecting them subtly. He’s mostly quiet-ish, not too loud but loud enough sometimes you can hear him

M!reader is trying to be useful to 141, doing anything but relaxing for a moment. The first to notice anything strange would be Ghost or Price, just a weird change in their mood as they do. Slowly his mask is breaking as they could see the life in his eyes practically slowly drain away, looking as if he had mentally broken

Shortly after all of 141 notices eventually, they would sometimes ask or pry, but m!reader responds with a smile and re-assurance but it’s bs….. they can feel it too but he is still telling them he’s alright. M!reader is slowly losing it internally, but anyways………..,.😭😭😭😭😭😭

M!reader always goes outside during the night and silently breaks down on rare occasions, when he does he just letting the tears fall. This time though 141 follows him outside where m!reader breaks down, anguished filled cries and many years of mental and or physical torment where it makes someone’s heart ache. M!reader is not known to cry so this is a first for them, whispering to himself self-deprecation as 141 now just steps in and comforts the poor m!reader 🥺🥺

[A/n:Thank you for requesting]

Summary:On the outside your a super fun and cheerful guy but in the inside your hurting and you slowly start to lose your cheerfulness

Type:Scenario: 141 X M!Reader

Version:Mw2

~

You were the most cheerful person. Always having a large smile on your face, cheering others up, etc, etc. You were a happy guy, sorta. There were times when your mask would break, showing your unsettling blank face staring off, but that only happens when you're alone. If someone finds you like that, you were originally alone. Some people, like Ghost, had doubted your happiness due to the fact your in the military, you've seen hundreds die, you've possible been tortured, kidnapped, starved, had to survive with barely anything at your grasp, he wouldn't know, you didn't originally join the 141, so he didn't know, but what Ghost did know was the smile never left, your eyes would sometimes tell other stories but the smile, it was like...frozen there, forever. Price was another to suspect you, mainly because you avoid personal questions like it's a grenade, aka as much as possible you try to run away from it, or throw it back. Getting something personal out of you was like finding a whale in Ohio(as an ohioan, there are no whales. But there a law about them), it's not gonna happen. Trust Price, he's tried. But other than that, only the sometimes emotionless eyes or sad eyes make him wonder if you're really happy. No one else really noticed. They didn't pay enough attention or didn't spend enough time with you to notice. But either way, it wasn't easy to notice. But eventually, you started to break, every act you've put on it coming to an end. Your smile became weaker, less happy. Your eyes become droppy with sadness. You stopped being so cheerful, less talkive, and you couldn't hold on to the act much longer. You stayed outside longer, the crying for hours on end, you were stressed, overworked, overwhelmed, sad, a lot of things but happy wasn't one of them. You tried to talk to Price, but it didn't work. He was either too busy or you were too scared. You also tried telling Rodolfo, That didn't work either. You changed the subject before even mentioning the original subject. You started to activity avoid mentioning it. How much longer could you hold up? Not much longer, let's say that. It's currently taking everything in your power to not break down in front of everyone. It is hard even lasting all day. Shivering from the cold, you hug your knees to your chest, thinking about how to deal with tomorrow. You had nothing planned, but you heard Soap was gonna try and hang out with you, which you were fine with. Sighing, you wiped your tears and stood up. Dusting your pants off, you walked back inside, telling everyone you were just tired when they asked if you were okay. Laying down you looked over at Gaz, your bunk mate, who was asleep, not necessarily sound asleep since he snores a lot, along with random words, like mac...one of the most common words he says. Sometimes you think it has something to do with mac & cheese, that his one of his favorite easy meals to eat. Rolling back over, you let out a small whimper, holding back your tears. You hugged yourself and took a deep breath. Letting yourself fall asleep, for once. When you woke up, Gaz was gently shaking you. Looking at him, it was abit blurry and the light shining in your eyes made it hurt to look in his direction.

"Heeeyyy, morning sleepy head. You need to get up we got training to do"

Gaz smiled at you, a warming smile that would make your heart warm slightly. Giving a weak smile back, you slowly got up. It was more difficult than most days. It was like you had shackles weighing you down. Sitting on the edge of the bed, you stared down at the floor watching the shadow of Gaz go from one side to the other side. He was walking around getting ready for the day. Looking up at him, you watched him tighten his belt before looking over.

"You gonna get ready?"

He still had that smile. Nodding, you stood up and hurried to get ready. Once you're done getting ready, Gaz had already left the room. Looking in your mirror, you took a deep breath a couple of times, making eye contact with yourself. You saw those sad eyes, rubbing your eyes. You looked back at yourself, still with sad eyes. You sighed and gave a smile, making sure to have the wrinkles by your eyes to give the effect of a real smile. Nodding to yourself, you walked out and headed to where Gaz was. You did your best, not enough to please Ghost, but enough to not break down. Going into the kitchen, you stood there staring at the sink. You rarely eat, ever since that wave if depression hit you for the first time your eating habits got worse and worse, you got skinner and skinner, but stronger since you were in the military. Sighing you walked out of the kitchen without eating anything, again. König watched you leave, confused he looked at the skin where you were looking. There was only a cup overfilled with water, but you could see your reflection. König looked the way you left. You walked with your head low, staring at the floor you walked on. Everyone made sure not to run into you or make sure you don't run into them. Walking to Prices office you knocked on the door. Silence. Groaning you knocked again. More Silence.

"Captain Price!"

You yelled with the happiest tone you could muster. Again, silence.

"Alright, I'm coming in"

Opening the door you peeked in.

"Captain....?"

It was dark, flicking the light on you looked around confused. Price wasn't there at all. Sighing you turned around, turning the light off and closing the door, you looked around turning to think of where he could have gone. Walking around you looked for the captain, and you kept looking until evening. Looking over you seen Soap looking at you from across the room. Smiling, he waved you over. Smiling back at him with a wide, warm smile, you trotted over to him.

"Hey Soap, how's it going?"

You and Soap talked for awhile. Cracking jokes, talking about multiple different things, etc. After awhile you said you had to go. Going outside you looked around for Price alittle more, sighing you layed down, and stared up at the stary sky. The moon sighing bright.

"Are you sure about this captain?"

Soap asked while they all walked to the back door. Captain had seen how cautious and panicked you looked awhile looking for him. So much so that you didn't notice him. Ghost was walking next to Soap, with Gaz behind them trying to keep up with them, a tad bit to tired to fully process what's going on.

"You didn't see his face, now did you?"

Price looked back at Soap who shook his head no. Nodding Price opened the doors with both hands, looking around he seen you laying down, staring up at the sky quite far away from them.

"There"

Price didn't point at you or nothing, just hurried over to you. Before he could say anything, Ghost stopped him.

"Price."

Price stopped and looked at Ghost.

"He's crying, seems to have been going on for awhile"

Looking back at you, Price saw your hand wiping your eyes, sobbing quietly, you muttered to yourself. Price looked at you with guilt, now understanding all those times you walked into his room, just about every day. Standing over you, Price looked down. Seeing your fearful shocked eyes, filled with tears, your cheeks shiny from crying. Price signed and crouched down. Gaz leaned against Price, still tired. Soap and Ghost where standing next to Price, also looking down at your hopeless body. Price his hand on your cheek, rubbing away your tears.

"It's alright son, no need to hide it."

Gaz snapped out of it when he heard that. Using Price's shoulder as a lift, looking at you, he gasped. He's never seen you so weak, so vulnerable. Letting out a loud hic, you grabbed Price's hand, ugly crying you let Price hold you.

"Let it all out, your safe here."

You sat up, hugging Price tightly. You cried into his shoulder, hard. Soap dropped to his knees and hugged you, it's the most he could do right now, he had nothing he could say. The lump in his throat preventing him from saying much.

"We got you..y/n we got you, okay?"

Soap whispered in your ear, hoping to calm you down, even just alittle bit. Gaz patted your head, pulling your head away from Prices shoulder you looked up at him. Smiling, Gaz gently caressed your head. Giving warm to your worn out brain, that's corrupted with the wrong thoughts and ideas.

"Hey..y/n,"

You looked at Ghost.

"Why did you hide? We understand if you can't keep going, you knew that, didn't you? We're here to help, that's the point of the military"

Your eyes widened, you didn't have a answer for him. You didn't have an reason.

"I-I..."

You couldn't give an answer. Ghost let out a small sign, not one of disappointment or anything negative. It's just that small air he's been holding in without realization.

"No need to answer, just... try to talk to us, even if it's hard."

You nodded, opening your arm to Ghost. He stared at it for a second before joining the hug. For you.

~

[A/n:I'm not sure if this is all that good 😅. I hope you enjoyed]

[rindragon-from-twewy]

Y'all never guess who the brainrot's been about today boiiiis-

Headcannon dump incoming; (spoilers for the ending) (I'm writing these from a post game perspective)

1: the most grandpa pyjamas you've ever seen. Wears his mask to sleep but wears one of those girlie-pop eyemasks with the big fake lashes over top so people know he's asleep (or at the very least, can't see)

2: Rollerskates round his penthouse to pass the time (occasionally), often blasting music through large stereos and his playlist is a terrible mix of classical orchestra and pop from between the 1970's-2010's

3: other hobbies include balloon crafts, card/magic tricks and decorating new masks <3

4: Ofc ik this one isn't real the way I drew it here but I like to think that he was sort of... cattle branded? With the 0001, a forever mark that he is the first and only 'successful' homunculus. Maybe I'd re-place it on the back of his neck? Since we never see there, canonically.

5: His favourite Pokemon is Mewtwo. He cried when he watched the first pokemon movie, balling at the "I see now that the circumstances of one's birth are irrelevant. It is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are". Like he called up Yuma right after fully sobbing about how "Mewtwo's just like me fr-" and then didn't shut up about it, so much so that Martina got him the shirt I drew him in

6: I feel like he wants friends but is just... deeply socially awkward. Now that all the secrets are out etc etc, he has no real reason to hide anymore but... there's just no real way for him to get out and socialize. It ends up with him considering Yomi's ex-lackeys to be the closest things he has to friends, since I like to believe they all work directly under him now.

7: Coming off number 6, I imagine him going to Yomi's jail cell to vent to him and then intentionally take the opposite of any advice Yomi gives him. This ultimately backfires as sometimes Yomi does actually give good advice simply in hopes it'll stop Makoto from coming back.

8: He doesn't actually know how to look after himself very well. Beyond keeping himself clean, that is. He has people clean his house and do all his cooking, he's got a decent sense of the value of money but doesn't really mind throwing his own saving's about on random whims. Does this mean he tries to buy people's friendships through gifts? Occasionally. Does it work? ...... sometimes!

9: Ok so I assume we're all in agreement that either Makoto or Yuma had to die their hair- I think it's safe to assume Yuma was the one to cut his hair short but I think maybe Makoto's the one to dye it. I think No.1 wouldn't have been dumb enough to go "I know, I'll dye my hair purple, nobody will notice the roots showing and come to the conclusion I erased my memory on perpous!" Cuz he's not that dumb- (I hope-) So, you may be asking. Why blonde? Cuz he's a barbie girl in a barbie world, obviously.

10: So I spent the whole time playing raincode like "Yuma's so kirigiri and naegi's kid or something-" And ofc I knew it'd stay a headcannon and not be real cannon but it's stuck. So yeah, Makoto named himself after who he remembered to be his father. I think, since Makoto wants to be a good person, he called himself after the good-est person he knew at the time.

This isn't all the rot but if u read all that then just know this is all eventually gunna be included in fanfics I plan to write-

I am a writer I promise I just don't have the movitation rn-

[stuckinapril]

you literally give such good advice, like you give such wise big sister vibes/the woman in ur life you know thats older than you (or is just wise) and wish was ur sister!! Like ugh how are you so wise? im only a teen so i couldnt be that wise bc i havent lived that long but you help me see the world in such a beautiful way, i'm seeing beauty in everything now and im calmer, get more sleep, my mental health is better and im even doing better in school, you are truly an angel

i hope everything you want works out well for you, and both of your sides of the pillow are cold (or warm, whatever you'd like)

i hope to meet more people like you one day, i just wanted to reach out and say ty for sharing your thoughts on here for everyone to see because they're so beautiful and great! And they just help me sm everytime i see them

off topic but i SWEAR everytime im about to get upset or something weird happens i go on tumblr (coincidentally) because im overwhelmed and i go on my phone to cope, go on tumblr and see you on feed and im like why was i upset lmfao?

!!! absolutely no words. thank you so so much for your kindness. i always figured that anon would be a way to hide behind a mask and say absolutely horrible things; it never crossed my mind that there are people w such warm, burgeoning hearts out there that they’d use it as a means to drop in joy without expecting anything for it. i am actually blown away. this means more to me than u will ever know.

my anxiety (and just struggling to function in general) peaked when i was a teenager. it was a time i would’ve wanted nothing more than someone to reassure me that things would get better. so (at the risk of sounding very cheesy) now i strive to be that for people who need it, or genuinely just an outlet for anyone who wants to let out their thoughts bc i know that helps too. i’m literally just a 21 year old w raging female thoughts, still learning and messing up and re-learning and everything in-between, but i’m really glad my long-winded thinkpieces help u anon <3 like truly touched & grateful it had some sort of impact, however big or small it may be. will be ur big sister whom u could vent to always and forever. this is us

[lunartearrose]

Ockiss24 day 7: Dare! With that, we complete the week!

Ocs: Cobalt (inkling), Yuki (octoling) (ft. Boron in foreground)

World: Splatoon

Drabble below! Warning there are slight drinking mentions!

It was Cobalt's birthday, and all of his friends had been invited over for the party! It was a nice little gathering arranged by his closest friend Neon, and everyone else chipped in with snacks, games, and of course drinks.

Cobalt doesn't do alcohol, but plenty of his pals partake - and it seems that Taro and Yuki are about to both have their first taste.

Taro spat it out almost immediately, while Yuki considered the taste, shrugged, and chugged the rest of the bottle before he could be told maybe that wasn't the best idea!

Needless to say, it was strong stuff and Yuki got a little tipsy. Mercury was sure to supply him with plenty of home made bread in an attempt to soak up some of it.

The night rolled on, and Boron organized some games! Everyone had some fun with cards and some other stuff as everyone that does drink slowly gets down to Yuki's level of drunkenness.

But then, with a grin, Boron fished the bottle that Yuki drained from the trash, holding it over his head.

“Spin or dare! Let's do it!!” Boron cheered, giggling to himself.

“Spin or dare?” Taro asked inquisitively.

“Its spin the bottle with a way out!” Boron says, “usually you spin and kiss whoatever it spins to, but we got peeps like my sis merc who haaates to kiss at parties, and cobalt only smooches dudes! So!! If it lands on you and you're not kissin shit, you gotta do a dare that the spinner picks!! You can go back and kiss if the dares too much, but yeah! Who's in???”

Everyone was, and the game began! Of course, majority was doing dares, though Neon definitely cheated with kisses on foreheads and cheeks. Not to mention she's always wearing a gas mask, so it feels more like a puppy headbutting the recipient than anything.

Eventually, it was Cobalt's turn! He spun the bottle hard, a couple of his more drunk friends cheering about the speed. Slowly, it slowed down, until…

…it landed on Yuki.

An uproar of ooh's come from the drunk peanut gallery.

Of course it had to be Cobalt's crush. And Yuki was not only drunk, but he had a 100% dare rate so far. As much of a nice present a kiss would be, Cobalt knew his chances were likely low, if not zero.

Yuki, after he finished staring at the bottle, scooted over by cobalt, knocking the bottle to the side on the way. From a light dare from Rhodi earlier, Yuki's usual face mask was hanging off his right ear, to stay off for at least one more turn. A weak dare by Spin or Dare standards, but appreciated by Cobalt in secret. Yuki's pouty, flushed face was really cute!

A ways away, Yuki continued to stare, his thin, still-growing-back tentacles waving around in the air. Was it stress, or because he was hammered?

Taking it easy, Cobalt rested his weight on one of his arms, momentarily re-adjusting his little birthday hat before he glanced back at Yuki. “So, I'm guessin’ it's a da-”

Before he could finish, Yuki had smushed his lips against Cobalt's, with enough force that it kinda hurt a bit. They froze there for a bit, stuck in the moment. It was long enough that Cobalt heard Boron's camera go off, likely immortalizing the moment forever.

After some time, Yuki pulled back. Flustered and drunk, and strangely as breathless as Cobalt had been left. He squinted at cobalt, a warbling little octoling noise rising from his throat before he spoke.

“I ain't a coward!! I'm takin yer dare too!!” Yuki announced, sitting back on his knees and crossing his arms, “Do your WORST, Cobalt!!!! I'll take it all!!!”

“Oooh, tell em Yuki!” Neon cheered.

Cobalt… couldn't think of what he was going to even dare before.

“I- u-uh- um…” Cobalt stuttered, “i-i really don't know! I guess- i guess do whatever you really really want to do????? I dunno!! I think you win here!”

Yuki considered the words, a thoughtful tentacle touched to his chin, as his arms remained crossed. After a moment, Yuki nodded to himself.

And then, he wormed his head into Cobalt's lap, closing his eyes.

“I'm gonna nap then!” Yuki declared, getting cozy. “It's real late. Gimme your bed if you got other games!! To do! But yer not aloud to kiss ANYONE. ‘Cause… ‘cuz I won. That's why!!”

And with that, he was silent. Several friends cackled over the situation, and several more pictures were taken. The game is thoroughly disrupted, so breaks are had to eat more snacks, talk, and take bathroom trips.

“Eh, s-sorry about the brother of mine…” Taro apologized, “Taro did not think he would be a… well… drunk crazy. Would Cobalt like Taro to move him?”

“I-it's fine! Let him sleep it off. He'll probably wake with a nasty hangover, so I don't mind letting him take my bed. Everyone who's had a drink will probably be sleepin’ over anyways.” Cobalt replied with a smile, patting Yuki's head gently.

“Ok! Um, where will cobalt sleep? With Yuki?” Taro asked curiously, seeming quite invested in the answer.

“Would he really want that, you think?” Cobalt asked, “I want him to be cozy, and from what I gather about him he doesn't really like being close to people, especially while out of it. You know?”

Taro thought for a long minute, deeply considering the whole thing. “Eh… then maybe do rest near, not in bed? Yuki wakes in night sometimes. Wakes scared, and needs who he trusts. He does trust you. Yuki will need someone if a hang-over adds to this. Taro can stay with other guests - and Cobalt, you get me if Yuki asks, ok? He does like soft beds in bad times.”

“Sounds like a plan!” Cobalt replied, and gave a thumbs up.

The night went on, and ran somewhat late. Those staying settled in the living room, and those sober enough to leave bid their farewells, save for Taro. He was set up with a blanket and pillow close to neon, second earliest to sleep.

Cobalt gave Yuki his bed, digging out his air mattress to use nearby. As Taro predicted, Yuki woke up sometime in the night, and the hangover made his night-terror awakening much worse. All through it, Cobalt was there for him, and woke Taro to help.

In the end, Yuki made Cobalt stay in bed with him after the nausea settled down. Taro took the air matress Cobalt used earlier, and things settled down into a more peaceful quiet.

“... Hey, Cobalt…?” Yuki muttered softly, stirring him from the edge of sleep.

“Mhm?” Cobalt muttered quietly, arms around the octoling reassuringly.

“... I'm sorry I did that earlier… the kiss.” Yuki apologized, “E-even if it was part of the game, I feel bad for doing that without asking if you were ok with it….”

Cobalt shook his head. “Don't be. If I didn't feel like it, I wouldn't play. And… I really didn't mind yours.”

“You sure…?” Yuki asked.

“Mhm. M’ sure.” Cobalt replied, barely paying attention to his words as he drifted off, “I'd let’cha kiss me as maaany times as ya want… whenever ya dare to… goodnight.”

With that, Cobalt was asleep. Yuki stared at him in the dark for a little while longer, ruminating on his words until his looming headache made him shut his eyes again.

He cuddled up closer, moving blindly until his lips found Cobalt's again. It was much shorter, but even more enjoyable with a clearer head.

Afterwards, Yuki relaxed, and finally felt safe enough to sleep again. He cuddled as close as he could be.

“Goodnight…”

[screampied]

well, hello there. (read as lady dimitrescu’s voice)

ok, vegas, you interacted with my account…again. love, i think you’re ought to find out who i am before we can even smell october 1st. so cute that you think i’m sweet, because whenever i re-read what i wrote for you im like “oh, that’s not…that’s weird”. i also think you are very sweet! i’m intimidated with people, so indeed i took the opportunity of being high and loose and approachable to send you that first ask.

i think being a whore for ghostface is as easy as saying it’s name. the masks stays on!! do i mean sex or the killing? both? yes. hm, moving along, what’s you favorite ghostface? mine would be stu and jill.

oh, oHH. ok but toji removing the mask, slowly, and the first thing you see is his scarred lips with that smirk. like stfu, i’ll show him a scream. and geto. that man is my lawfully husband, and picturing him with that knife is doing stuff to me. blood on his face, like in hidden inventory, passing his thumb to try and clean it…mshdhdjdjdk fainted

sam as ghostface would’ve been predictable, but it would still be cool. i think they could take a different approach with her. while everyone is scared shitless because a knew killer has show up, she would be excited because-well, she can kill now. again and again, with the excuse of saving her friends and sister. maybe might even kill someone by “mistake” who knows. i think it would be nice, i like the idea of the good character going a lil crazy crazy.

the thing about sidney is that they won’t have the courage to kill her. literal mother of the final girls. but… dale? yeah, i’m bracing myself and praying for her poor little soul.

yes!! they were right in what they did and the ones that loses are the directors. the movie won’t do good at all without them, so must likely they will comeback, as we say in my country, “the sorry dog comes back” as in the directors are the sorry dog, with tail in between their legs.

between cars and bikes im more inclined to cars, but bikers and drivers? ugh, i’m sold to the bikers. sukuna is the type of guy to go to street races just for the fun of nearly dying (in a modern world, of course). i picture a red vintage car with black flames draw in it. oh he would so sexy, he is sexy. others i can see in street race is toji (of course, he bets all the time) and suguru. idk this trinity can have me anytime any day anywhere.

SHUT UP HUNGER GAMES IS SO FUCKING COOL

i used to be a divergent person, but hunger games has grow in my heart. finnick and peeta forever the best boys, suzanne collins cooked with them. and then she fucking burned it with finnick’s. still not over it, how come gale is alive???

jokes aside, i actually fuck with her writing so much, because it’s true, there is no actual victory in a war, we lose too much to be able to live through it. too much nightmares and death.

i’m reading a fanfic set in the hunger games universe, nearly as many words as in the bible, and it’s so fucking good. the author wrote the aftermath of the games perfectly, the rebellion, missions, the games itself. it’s everything.

yapping is done, question of the day is favorite movie and favorite music? see ya!!

nut anon

SLLLAAAY

nutty pook i rly enjoy our long chats i just wanna let u know that 🫡. also the lady dimitrescu voice ????? stawp. do you play resident evil oh now that game is my shit.

LOLLLL DID I. i swear it’s not intentional man. maybe it’s fate 🧿🧿 you think im sweet omg ty AAAAH.

sex with ghostface where the mask stays on is actually cry FUCKKK IM GONNA WRITE THAT. october is gonna bring out the slut in my writing istg. ooooh my fav ghostface ?? probably jill and roman. i love amber too, but billy ofc.

GHOSTFACE TOJIIII DONT DO THIS TO ME. he’s so do that, don’t mind me im writing this down 🚶‍♀️🚶‍♀️🚶‍♀️🚶‍♀️. real they can’t kill the baddest bitch, the whole franchise is nothing without mother.

sukuna as a street racer ID CREEWWAM. i literally saw a sukuna car at the race i went to. i had many interesting thoughts ……. kuna def bets ur so right, toji too with his broke ass.

KEKFLGLHL I LOVE THG ITS SO GOOD. do you like the movies or books better? i like the books but the movies slap

fav movie uhhhhh legally blond, fav music psychedelic pop and indie !!!!

[youngerdrgrey]

all the pieces aren't even in the box // the morning show, bradley/laura, chapter two

about: Bradley and Laura's last few months in Montana and how the world reacts along the way (and maybe how they find their way back to each other) ~ read chapter one chapter two summary: in mid-July 2020, the gulf between Bradley and Laura widens as Sandy's funeral approaches. Laura's well-meaning ideas could change their relationship forever.

notes: my friends have requested/actively campaigned that this is not solely a break-up story. (they're anti-break up in general. we'll see, but either way, there will be joy as well.) it's not long after chapter one. Here's Bradley Jackson to kick us off before Laura takes the reins again. (read chapter one on AO3)

mid J U L Y (2020)

Somehow Sandy Jackson’s funeral becomes the hottest ticket in West Virginia.

It’s not like Bradley can go either way, but suddenly everybody she’s ever known wants to go and pay their respects. And fucking Hal — bless him — he’s never made an e-vite in his life. Bradley’s the one who types up the information and sends him the template. All he has to do is input the emails and paste it on Facebook.

But when Hal finally fucking posts it, he’s taken out the note about masks and social distancing. Bradley calls him up immediately, but he screens her call. Of course she leaves a voicemail.

“Hal! Don’t make me call you again. I haven’t asked for much, but you’d think since our mom died of fucking Covid that you would keep the mask mandate at her funeral. Or do you wanna die too?”

Bradley winces as soon as the words leave her mouth.

It’s just the kind of shit her mom used to say. She can’t fucking put that on Hal. She doesn’t think he’s suicidal. He’s just…. He doesn’t use his head right. He doesn’t want to be uncomfortable because once he gets uncomfortable, he starts thinking about what makes him actually comfortable, and he’s not supposed to be doing any of that anymore. He’s managed to stay sober since Mom died. She can’t fucking push him to the edge now.

So she hits the button to re-record and snaps, “Don’t screen my calls. Call me back. I don’t want Mom’s funeral to be a superspreader. Just put the masks as optional if you have to.”

She hangs up so that version of the voicemail will go through. Huffs as her phone buzzes with another dozen RSVPs. Fucking Harvard boy Alan from South East News Network clicked maybe. He’d never even met her mom.

Who would’ve thought when you cussed out those coal protestors that you’d end up anchoring at UBA? Let me know if you’re coming back for the funeral. We should get coffee.

How in the fuck did he even see this?

.

.

Bradley spends the rest of the day on a warpath. She stomps ahead of Laura on their afternoon walk. She turns on a movie even though she knows Laura would rather watch another episode of SVU. She even finishes the coffee creamer and puts it back in the fridge instead of chucking it into the trash.

It’s not like it matters. She’s the one who has to take it out anyway. She’s the only one who ever leaves the house for real. She can go to the grocery store, but she can’t go say goodbye to the woman who raised her. She can talk to the whole country every morning, but talking to the rest of her family? Giving some emotional eulogy about who they lost, or why they have to fucking wear masks even though some random coworker on Facebook who hasn’t washed his hands in three years claims to be an expert on disease.

At least Laura takes it in stride. She pulls up a separate blanket for herself on the couch without comment. She pours her wine a little heavier and gives Bradley a wide berth for their unintended movie night. She’s more patient than Bradley deserves. More patient than Bradley would be in reverse. 

Bradley would’ve started emptying other things just to make the point of how fucking frustrating it is to have empty containers in the fridge. But Bradley’s a mess, and Laura is not. Laura has an entire ranch with horse stables and an in-home studio. A bookcase in her sitting room with her Emmy awards and her Pulitzer. A real life with real people who come over when she’s lonely and play charades in her backyard.

What does Bradley have? What has she ever had in this shitty world she’s trapped in?

Hal finally calls Bradley back an hour into the movie. Bradley waves Laura off before Laura even reaches for the remote.

“You can keep watching,” Bradley says as she gets up off the couch. 

She heads out the french doors to the backyard. Figures that way if she starts yelling at her brother Laura won’t freak out too much. Bradley’s gotta stop bringing chaos into Laura’s house. Wasn’t that what Laura said back in Nevada? No chaos. That’s why she cut off Alex. That and the outing, but it’s not like Bradley can out Laura a third time.

Hal launches into a speech the moment Bradley answers. He says, “I’ll have a box of masks there, but if I put that in the invite, that’s it. All they’ll talk about is masks and how vaccines won’t work once they’re ready. It’s a funeral, Bradley, not one of your debates.”

Bradley bites on her tongue so hard it stings. It’s not a debate either way, Hal. It’s basic science. 

She grinds out, “Fine. But where’s the Zoom link?”

“Come on, Brad.”

Her eyes flash. “Don’t ‘come on.’ There has to be a Zoom, or I won’t see it at all.”

“That’s not fair. I’m the one setting all this up.”

“And I’m the one paying for it! I’ve been making all the calls—“

“And I’m just the screw up who puts the tables out, huh?”

It’s a trap, but Bradley’s not letting it go. “You said it not me.”

“Yeah, I said it. You can make all the calls you want from your little girlfriend’s cabin, but I’m the one actually sitting in this shit.” Hal’s voice shakes. Like roof tiles in a thunderstorm. Garage doors on the way down. “You want to deal with all the fucking food in the deep freezer? All these shitty ass casseroles? You know the fridge couldn’t even close the other day? We should’ve had a death as kids. That would’ve filled it up.”

“Don’t say that.”

He’s not listening. He sounds manic. Not at full tilt, but ramping up. “Everybody’s got something to say. They miss her. They loved her. They’re full of shit. You know how many people called when she had Covid? Guess. Guess how many, Brad.”

Saddest fucking guessing game of her life. 

“I don’t know, four.” That’s Roberta from the church, Mary Anne from their old park, and Lewis from the senior center. He was sweet on their mom last Bradley heard. Better to her than their no good father ever could’ve been. Mom’s words.

“One. You.”

A chill rolls down her spine. Only one.

She averts her eyes out to Laura’s yard. Technically she’d been looking out that way before, but she wasn’t looking at first. It was just something to glare towards since she couldn’t glare at Hal. 

But there’s a squirrel picking at the open table fire pit. There’s probably some marshmallow if it digs deep enough. Laura dropped half of hers the other night. The s’mores were meant to be a pick-me-up for Bradley. They hadn’t been able to do them when Emma and Sam were over. Sandy’s death put a damper on their gay double date.

Sandy Jackson, for all her faults, didn’t deserve to die alone. A whole life, and the only people who checked on her were the kids who had to. Hal couldn’t avoid it. He lived there. And Bradley….

Maybe Hal was wrong. Maybe he missed the calls or the texts.

Bradley asks, “You sure? Nobody from the church?”

Hal sniffles. “Not until after she died. Then it was flowers by the screen door. Casseroles and all them knocking whenever they saw Ma’s car in the driveway. I put it in the garage. Turned off the lights so they’d leave me alone.”

Bradley’s heart aches. He used to do that as a boy. Sit in the dark during fights and try to see how quiet he could be. Like he could make himself small enough to just disappear. He should’ve grown out of that by now. He shouldn’t still be so damn afraid of being alive.

“What about Sheryl?” That’s Hal’s girlfriend. “Why don’t you go to her place? Hide out over there.”

“Like you and Laura?” Hal huffs. “I’m fine here.”

“You’re not fine. You’re —“

“I’m fine. Sitting in the dark’s a lot better than getting high. You want something to fix? Help me keep Dad from showing up.”

Bradley freezes. She hasn’t heard from their dad since she started on TMS. He’d called her out of the blue, and she’d told him never to talk to her again. Was he still talking to Hal? She can’t stop that. She can’t let him back into her life.

She must take too long to say something because Hal huffs a second time.

He says, “Didn’t think so. Forget it. You want a Zoom, then send a link. I don’t have the fancy one. Mine’ll cut off after an hour.”

“Alright.” Her voice sounds too soft. Quiet. Weak. She repeats herself with force behind it. “Alright, I’ll send you a link. Add it into the invite. Tell everybody they can log in if they don’t want to go in person.”

She knows as she says it that he won’t do that. He’ll add the link, but he won’t make the suggestion. He wants all those people there. He wants the strangers and the church fellowship and the fans who only go to see if Bradley will show up. He wants a village. And she can’t give him that.

“I gotta go, Brad.”

“Yeah, me too. Laura’s… watching a movie.” Bradley can’t remember which one now. “Call me if something else comes up.”

“Yeah, sure.” He hesitates, but he clicks off without saying that he loves her. 

“Love you too,” she says to nobody.

.

.

Laura isn’t watching the movie when Bradley walks back in. It’s paused on nearly the same screen Bradley left it on. An immature part of Laura had wanted to change the channel while Bradley was gone. They were meant to watch SVU tonight. Bradley knew that, but the blonde’s been lashing out in little ways.

She lets the trash overflow before taking it out. She makes her own coffee while Laura’s in the shower and stews in the studio until show time. She stops calling Laura babe.

But Bradley is allowed to be upset that her mom died. Bradley gets to react to that. Would Laura like if the reaction didn’t feel targeted at her? Of course. That does not change the fact that this is how Bradley needs to grieve. Laura can give her that. Until after the funeral at least.

So Laura finishes her first glass of wine and pours a second. Picks up the book on attachment styles that she’s only partially reading out of passive aggression. And she waits for her girlfriend to come back. And if it feels like she’s still waiting, even as Bradley returns and settles back onto the couch beside her, well, that’s between Laura and her next therapy appointment.

“How’s Hal?” Laura asks. 

Bradley circles her jaw, but she doesn’t make a sound. Not the worst call then. “He invited half of West Virginia to Mom’s funeral. Everybody will be there.” Except her. “Except me.”

Laura closes her book to reach for her wine. Says without thinking, “You’re welcome to go. You’d just—“

“Quarantine when I got back, I know,” Bradley finishes. Laura’s jaw ticks. Another little rebellion. Bradley’s eyes flash with recognition. “I cut you off.”

“You were right this time.” Not to do it, but about what Laura would have said.

If Bradley goes to the funeral, then they won’t see each other for nearly three weeks. There’s the nearly two thousand miles from Montana to the other side of country. The day for the ceremony and another to help Hal clean up before Bradley turns around to drive all two thousand miles again. Then two weeks of quarantining. That’s only if Bradley doesn’t catch Covid from anyone out there.

“Three weeks,” Bradley voices. “It’s not forever. You know Emma and Sam could come over. Have some s’mores. Talk all about me when I’m not inside cutting the strawberries.” She says it like it’s an actual possibility. Like it could be a change of pace and not the first step in their death march.

What if Bradley gets sick? What if she can’t leave West Virginia again? What if her case is serious, and Laura can’t get to her without it literally killing them both?

But if Laura doesn’t let Bradley go, isn’t that another end in and of itself? They’ve barely been dating five months. Four if they count from when they became official instead of when they kissed in Iowa. And again in New York. In Bradley’s hotel.

Five months is too soon to restrict somebody’s movements. Not quite restrict; it’s not an act of control. It’s an act of consideration. A relationship is compromise and partnership. Five months is too short a time to ask for this kind of sacrifice. If Laura even asks, she’ll sound unreasonable. Desperate and delusional. What kind of partner would Laura be to ask Bradley to miss her own mother’s funeral?

So Laura takes a heavier sip from her wine. Drinks until she can’t breathe and the only thing on her tongue is the black cherry notes in her cabernet sauvignon.

Bradley looks mildly concerned, but below that, underneath the fire that she barely tamps down, she looks hopeful. Laura can’t snuff that out.

Her mouth’s dry as she tries not to croak, “It’s not forever.”

Bradley almost squeals. She flips her phone over instantly. “I’ll message Gayle. She can coordinate with Stella and Mia. I won’t tell Hal until it’s official. Don’t want to get his hopes up if I can’t get another day off. D'you think Alison will do it, or do we need to see who else is available?”

She talks without looking at Laura. It’s for the best. Laura keeps a smile on her face, and she nods along, but all she really hears is three weeks. You’re welcome to go. And Bradley’s squeal at the thought of leaving Laura here alone.

.

.

read chapter three

[pepprs]

dont worry abt responding to my messages!! they can be little trinkets for u to keep forever if u wanna :)))

dear anon… how could i not respond to THESE!!!!!!!!!! 😭💗💗💗💗💗💗💗 you are the sweetest kindest most WONDERFUL soul. it is an honor to receive these beautiful letters and i hope you know how much i cherish each and every one. not just the words but the adventures you take me on and write up for the two of us!!! and the beauty and magic you help me to see in the world around me and the peace and love and love and love you conjure for me in moments when i cant find it or feel it so easy!!!! like idk i know i have no idea who you are outside of being dear anon and i only answer asks once in a blue moon but it truly means the world to me. TRULY.

your writing feels like all the best things, all the things i love most. like leaf piles in the fall and the pikmin bloom soundtrack (btw if you dont play that already i HIGHLY recommend it to you specifically, i think u would really like it and tbh you sending me these letters has the same vibe as my pikmin bringing me postcards from their adventures :"~DDDD!!! if you ever do join it please lmk i would LOVE to be friends and send you postcards and do adventures together!!!!) and frosting on cupcakes and twinkly dust motes in the sunlight and cumulus clouds and dogwood flowers and the way things made of glass refract rainbows and SUNLIGHT SUNLIGHT SUNLIGHT. and even that isnt cutting it. how magical it all is. like i wish i wasnt so exhausted so i could express it better but it truly is so... idk. NOSTALGIC! COZY! HOME!!!!!

so... in order to try to articulate it (and also show my thanks / return the favor / etc.), i am sending this letter along with a care package knitted with word and song and magic and light. enclosed please find:

wind chimes that sing like the sun hitting the lake (also i REALLY want to get a butterfly hair clip!!! i cant wear hair clips or anything else fancy in my hair bc of my mask headbands but id love to have one in case im ever able to wear it in the future 🥹)

a heart-shaped pebble from brighton, to add to your collection (btw i LOVE the part about how you lost them a long time ago but you love them so you remember what they look like. WAUGH. gut punch GUT PUNCH IN THE BEST WAY!!!!)

a mug for hot chocolate, so we can share some together when it gets cold again -- decorated with hand-painted stars in all colors!

a tiny needle to knit your sundust satchels -- like the kind youd find in pixie hollow or the tale of desperaux or something (also both things that have dear anon vibes to me and are also DEEPLY nostalgic for me!)

a recipe for starfait, with illustrations!! (also i LOVE that idea for a replacement for "tesscore"!! but i may end up using that for my personal tag on my undertale / deltarune blog instead bc its so perfect (and also im HONORED that u associate that with me 😭😭😭😭))

a crown and wand for you to wear to match the fairy queen mouse while you write the same kind of magic and comfort she brings!

a packet of magical flower seeds that sprout the most whimsical sweet-smelling flowers, with petals that are soft to the touch!

a hand-woven scarf in your favorite color threaded with shiny silver strands, like comets streaming through the sky (also i am SO late to say this but UNO REVERSE CARD re: your new years wish to me which is genuinely making me lumpthroated and teary eyed reading it again in AUGUST. you are the sweetest EVER. and also ive never played journey before but ive been interested in it for years!!! i'll have to check it out and/or watch a playthrough!)

a hummingbird sculpture on a long stick for you to plant in your garden among the flowers, to sing to them and to you! (also RE: your question about your vocal range -- it just means that you can cover a little over two octaves (the number after the letter is the octave it's in, and each octave is a span of c-d-e-f-g-a-b-c -- so your range starts at about halfway through the third octave and goes to halfway through the fifth!) i think your range is about the same as mine iirc so we can hum along with the hummingbird and all three follow each other's notes :"~D <3)

a golden acorn on a thread for you to wear as a necklace when we go to the bird tea party! (by the way, have you ever read the book ""until the last acorn "when the last acorn is found?" it's a BEAUTIFUL book and it made me cry reading it! i think you and the acorn people would get along very, very well!!)

a lantern made of jelly moonlight and silver foil stars (see: ilomilo chapter 4 :"~D) for you to carry on your walks through the dim nights (you can hang the stars in the sky, and they'll brighten the world and light at your touch!)

a copy of one of my favorite books of all time, "the ten thousand doors of january," which is so much about wedging cracks open into other worlds, and something i think you might like very much / resonate with too!!

a big, big hug.

dear anon: THANK YOU. for all these words and for being you. i dont know how i got so lucky to have you sending me these little trinkets but i will most CERTAINLY keep them forever. i hope you experience all the peace and love and love and love to infinity. may you always know and shine with the light you bring and the light you are.

[juniperhillpatient]

Tales of Ba Sing Se Re-watch

Alright, I ain't even gonna lie to you guys this is yet another re-watch post made after a couple glasses of wine. I really don't have anything too deep to say about this episode though, it's just fun. This is also one of my most highly re-watched episodes so I don't even know why I re-watched it again for this re-watch. Just the completionist in me, I guess. But I literally do watch this episode all the fucking time lol it's a comfort episode for me & good background noise plus it's one of my sister's faves so she literally always has either this or 'The Beach' on.

(Yes I know my sister has good taste. Please comment about it so I can tell her. She is 12 & would be delighted & validated to know people on the internet think she has good taste.)

Already this post has gotten off track! I swear I used to be a party girl y'all I used to be able to drink anyone under the damn table at any time now literally only 2 glasses of red wine on a weeknight & I'm loopy lmao. Okay, what was I saying? What do I have to say about this episode? Look, basically, it's a slice of life & it's kinda like a fluffy fanfic to me. Like, it's not relevant to the plot but I love it so much. It's so important to me. Every show needs at least 5 episodes a season in this vein, I think that would fix modern TV I'm being completely serious.

Alright, so first of all the beginning is hilarious & precious. I just love all the kiddos getting ready in the mirror, & Toph being a hot mess who's ready to go & doesn't give a fuck about dirt.

Katara & Toph's segment is just so fucking cute.

I always completely forget until watching this episode how hard I used to ship Katara & Toph lol! Now I no longer ship them romantically but they have such an adorable friendship. I really love how Toph is hesitant at first but goes along with Katara's idea, & even sticks around after they touch her feet - the one thing she asked not to happen (don't blame you, baby girl, this is Nickolodean after all.) Toph freaking the attendant out with her silly mud mask face & making Katara laugh gets me grinning like a fool every time. I of course love Katara & Toph showing those mean girls what's what & sharing a soft moment. Best girls. I love them so much. Oh shit, the iconic behavior competition. They get +500 each for sending those mean girls down the river.

Alright & Iroh's adventure!!! Wow, I have like, nothing deep to say about it but I love it so much. I love Iroh helping people selflessly. The interaction with the would-be mugger is great. But the juxtaposition from Iroh singing to the crying kid on the street & singing as he plays tribute to Lu Ten.....I get emotional every time. Iroh's little tale says a lot about the way he interacts with the world around him & I love it <3 Also, +100 iconic behavior points for changing the mugger's life so easily.

Aang's adventure is funny but I have no deep analysis? Sorry guys I'm lacking in the deep analysis area right now. I mean, there's not much to say. It's entertaining. I'm a little confused about how there can be a zoo outside the walls of Ba Sing Se? Isn't it....kinda tricky to get in & out? I don't...ok.....anyway...

Sokka's adventure is hilarious. I love the slam poetry moment. But I don't have much to analyze there other than "haha funny."

Zuko!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I don't know if you guys knew this about me, but I love Zuko. I know, I know, shocking. I love Zuko's little date with Jin. I saw the headcanon that Iroh purposefully made Zuko's hair into a 'do that would cause any girl with any sense to immediately ruffle it & that's just so cute, I totally read it that way from now on. "Zuko can't lie" as a character trait will forever be important to me. Zuko juggling even though he can't juggle will never not be funny & endearing. But I have to tell you guys, I was joking with some of you about how "Zuko has no game" before but like.....if u think about it Zuko did get a girl fully simping over him & trying desperately to get a lil kiss on the lips DESPITE his consistent fumbling so I MEAN. Say what you will but Jin was into him.

Also, I remember the first time I watched this episode I could not focus on anything else after Zuko lit the lanterns 'cause I was STRESSED. I was certain Zuko had given him & Iroh away.

Momo's segment just makes me sad 'cause it reminds me what episode is next & my heart is not ready.....

Anyway!!!! I love this cute little episode!!! That is all <3

[penny-anna]

am on a Mission to watch/re-watch as many other Batman films as possible before seeing The Batman next week here's where I'm at:

Batman (1989): solid 7/10 from me. i like all the batman & joker stuff. really enjoyed Michael Keaton as Bruce Wayne on a re-watch. also really like what a legit Maniac this Batman is. unfortunately tho while it starts out really well its treatment of Vicki Vale just gets. progressively more sexist as the film carries on?? it's like aw man this could have been so good but u had to go and be all Like That.

Batman Returns: danny devito penguin. michelle pfeiffer catwoman. what is not to love. also kind of sexist but in a much weirder and more chaotic way?? fucking. catwoman. baby. i love her.

Batman: Mask of the Phantasm: ehhh i see people raving about this one & like it's got some really good stuff in it but so much of the emotional journey of it hinges on the Bruce Wayne/Andrea Beaumont romance which I just do not care about. i found it kind of boring on first viewing, enjoyed it more on a re-watch bcos i appreciated Bruce's character arc more. also DCAU Batman is a++.

Batman Forever: it's fine. I remember enjoying it a lot when i was a kid. watching it back as a grown up it's not as Epic as i remembered and the fact that Dick Grayson is very clearly a 25 year old man and not a teenager just really irritates me. not a fan of Tommy Lee Jones Twoface but Jim Carey just doing his thing as the Riddler a+ no complaints.

anyway!! today i am going to re-watched Batman and Robin and then hopefully move on to the Nolan trilogy which i've never actually seen all the way through

[datcloudboi]

List of video games turning 10 years old in 2022:

- Armored Core V - Assassin's Creed III (the final Assassin's Creed in the Desmond Miles arc) - Assassin's Creed: Liberation (the first Assassin's Creed game with a female protagonist) - Asura's Wrath - Binary Domain (a third-person shooter from the Yakuza team) - Borderlands 2 (dear god, Gearbox needs to find some new jokes to tell) - Call of Duty: Black Ops II - Counter-Strike: Global Offensive - The Darkness II (a solid third-person shooter based on the comic book of the same name by David Wohl, Marc Silvestri, and Garth Ennis) - Darksiders II (one of the last games that THQ made before they went bankrupt in 2013) - Dead or Alive 5 - Diablo III (remember when this game was taking forever to come out?) - Dillon's Rolling Western - Dishonored - Dragon Quest X (only in Japan) - Dragon's Dogma (an action RPG from Hideaki Itsuno, the guy who helped make Devil May Cry what it is today) - Dust: An Elysian Tail (one of the best indie games you've never played) - Epic Mickey 2: The Power of Two - Far Cry 3 - Fez - Final Fantasy XIII-2 - Tom Clancy's Ghost Recon: Future Soldier - Gravity Rush - Halo 4 - Hatoful Boyfriend (the visual novel about dating pigeons) - Hitman: Absolution - Hotline Miami - The House of the Dead 4 - Journey - Kid Icarus: Uprising - Kingdom Hearts: Dream Drop Distance - Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning (deserved SO MUCH BETTER) - The Last Story (an action RPG from Hironobu Sakaguchi, the creator of Final Fantasy) - Lego Batman 2: DC Super Heroes (the first Lego game to use actual in-game dialogue instead of pantomiming everything) - Lego The Lord of the Rings - Lollipop Chainsaw - Lone Survivor - Mark of the Ninja (another of the best indie games that you have never played) - Mass Effect 3 (and its controversial ending) - Max Payne 3 - Medal of Honor: Warfighter (one of the last MoH games before it took an extended hiatus) - NeverDead (not a good game, but such a fun and unique concept) - New Super Mario Bros. 2 (COINS ARE BACK, BITCHES) - Ninja Gaiden 3 (plus its extended version, Razor's Edge) - One Piece: Pirate Warriors (what if Dynasty Warriors, but Luffy?) - Paper Mario: Sticker Star (the one that not a lot of people liked) - Persona 4 Arena - Persona 4 Golden - PlayStation All-Stars Battle Royale - The PlayStation Vita - Pokémon Black 2 and Pokémon White 2 - Pokémon Conquest (what if Pokémon was a Final Fantasy Tactics game? And crossed over with Nobunaga's Ambition?) - Professor Layton and the Miracle Mask - Prototype 2 - Resident Evil: Revelations - Resident Evil: Operation Raccoon City - Resident Evil 6 (yeah, 2012 wasn't a good year for RE fans) - Retro City Rampage (once again, a great indie game that nobody has played) - Rhythm Heaven Fever - Ridge Racer Unbounded (RIIIIIIIDGE RACERRRRRRR) - Silent Hill: Downpour (the last Silent Hill game before you-know-what happened) - Skullgirls (THE LAUNCH PARTY THAT NEVER ENDS) - Sleeping Dogs (one of the best games I have ever played. Not even joking) - Sonic & All-Stars Racing Transformed (what if Mario Kart was better?) - SoulCalibur V - Spec Ops: The Line - Street Fighter x Tekken - Syndicate (an FPS reboot of an RTS series from the 90s) - Tekken Tag Tournament 2 - The Testament of Sherlock Holmes - Thomas Was Alone (indie games are so good, you guys, JUST PLAY THEM) - Tokyo Jungle - Transformers: Fall of Cybertron - Twisted Metal (the reboot) - Telltale's The Walking Dead (still not over that ending) - The Wii U - XCOM: Enemy Unknown - Xenoblade Chronicles - Yakuza: Dead Souls - Ys Origin - Zero Escape: Virtue's Last Reward - ZombiU

[imasimpforshanks]

Heyyyyyy hiiiiii hope your having an awesome day drinking that water getting hydrated 😗. I was wondering if you could do a Law Angst alphabet please. But only if you feel up to it and have time. If you don’t feel free to ignore or do it later here now have a cookie 🍪 because your awesome 😊

Angst Alphabet - Trafalgar Law

a/n: HI HI!!! thank you for your kind words!! I hope you are looking after yourself <333 here is the law angst! Please enjoy 🥰

A-Accident (would they blame themselves if you died in an accident?)

He would only blame himself if any of his actions led to the accident that caused your death (we’ve seen him blame himself for that very reason about Rosinantes death). If his actions weren’t directly correlated to your death in any way then he would not blame himself, though he would kick himself for not being able to help you in time. Other than that, Law is painfully aware of the harsh reality that is life.

B-Break up (How would they break up with you?)

Law would break up with you in a seemingly emotionless way. He’d mask his true feelings, while telling you a whole bunch of excuses why the two of you could no longer be together. He doesn’t believe any of them, but he’s got to do what he’s got to do.

C-Crying (how would they make you cry?)

I feel like I’ve used this one in a few other character alphabets but it really applies to Law too. He would cause you to stress and panic so much over his health and wellbeing. He’s a literal doctor. He should know to take better care of himself, but he just doesn’t seem to care about himself the same way you do. So it isn’t until you’re crying in front of him, spilling your heart out about how concerned you are for his safety that he realizes his health is important to more than just himself.

D-Death (how would they react to your death?)

My god, if Law was to lose another person that he loved, he literally would never want to let himself get close to anyone ever again. Your death would be it for Law. He’d basically be on the verge of giving up himself. What other reason does he have to go on.

E-Emotion (what is one emotion they would try to hide the most and how would they do it?)

He tries to hide every emotion. Law doesn’t like to be too open, out of fear of people using it against him or it simply being too much of a sign of weakness. So, very rarely does he let his emotions show. He also tries to divert attention away from himself in hopes that people won’t focus on him or his emotions for too long.

F-Fight (do you two ever fight? How big are the fights? What do you fight about? Etc.)

This was covered in his fluff alphabet! But here it is again:

Your fights tend to be pretty short lived resulting in forgiveness and apologies from both sides relatively quickly. He really doesn’t like to stay mad at you for too long – he’d much rather have you two on the same page.

Most fights are caused by stress and concerns of health and safety, so Law does a lot of eye rolling and using his title as a ‘doctor’ as justification that he knows what he’s doing so you just need to chill – but like I said these fights are very short lived.

G-Guilt (what is the biggest thing they feel guilty about?)

Law will never forgive himself for Rosinantes death. He will forever feel responsible for his death – it was all his fault. If only he hadn’t given that note to Vergo, then Rosinante would still be alive. He died because of Law’s incompetence (at least that’s what he tells himself).

H-Heartbreak (what would cause them pain in the relationship? How would they deal during a break-up?)

During a break-up Law would act pretty normal. He wouldn’t behave any differently until he’s left alone. Only then would he let himself go and truly feel that heartbreak.

I-Injured (how would they react if you are badly injured?)

Thanks to the doctor in him, Law is able to remain calm. He can keep his composure until he administers whatever treatment necessary. That’s not to say he isn’t worried though. He’s just capable of focusing on the injury right in front of him.

Only once he is certain that you are stable does he (or potentially his crew) go and hunt down the cause of your beating.

J-Jealousy (what do they do if they are jealous?)

When Law does get jealous (which is rarely), he gets quiet. His fists clench a little more, and his frown deepens. He also speaks less than usual (which is already pretty hard to beat). He only gives you short snippy replies until he eventually gets over it.

K-Kill (would they kill for revenge?)

Law would kill for revenge, yes. He literally wanted to kill Doflamingo as revenge for Rosinante. However, it was in Law’s plan that Kaido would be the one to kill Doflamingo (after they fought) – so I believe that is how he’d kill for revenge as well. He would devise a fool proof plan (okay maybe not fool proof, bc if the straw hats are involved who knows what could go wrong).

In short, yes. Law would kill for revenge.

L-Loss (what is their greatest loss?)

This poor man has suffered so much loss in his life that it’s actually really difficult to choose which would be his greatest loss. He lost his entire family as a young boy while also having a shortened lifespan himself. Losing his family, and the realization that he only had a few more years to live, really made him lose his will to live a good remainder of his life. Young Law literally became a pirate.

However, he did meet Rosinante (Corazon) and he gave him another reason to live. Furthermore, Rosinante actively sought out a cure for Law so that he could continue to live a long life. Basically, Rosinante became a father figure/older brother to Law. So, losing him – another ¬person he loved so dearly – would have been beyond devastating.

M-Mistake (what is the worst mistake they ever made with you?)

There was one day where he spent the entire day ignoring you. It was completely unintentional. His mind was swarming with plans and all this other information that has just come in. He got so immersed in it that he didn’t talk to you or tell you what was going on for a whole day.

N-Nightmares (how often do they have them? What are they about? How do they deal with it?)

Nightmares are one of the many reasons Law hardly ever sleeps. He’s haunted by his family’s and Rosinantes deaths. His nightmares get particularly bad around the same time each year (that is, around the time of year that they died). He wakes up trembling and on the verge of tears (but he never lets them fall). Instead of even trying to go back to sleep, he’ll make himself a nice hot cup of coffee and immerse himself in a book or work of some kind – anything to avoid going back to sleep and risking a re-run of that horrible nightmare.

O-Outrage (how and why would they get mad at you?)

Sometimes his exhaustion catches up to him and other times its all the stress building up that finally he snaps and all the emotions are too overwhelming that he just directs it to the nearest outlet, which just so happens to be you.

P-Past (what has happened in your relationship that changed the way you saw each other?)

You walked in on him absolutely breaking down over Rosinante. One evening Law retreated to his room while you and the rest of the crew were eating and drinking. He didn’t think you had noticed him leave, but soon you were following after him. You opened the door and found him breaking down in the middle of the room. You completely forgot that it was the anniversary of Rosinantes death. It was the first time you had seen him this distraught and it broke your heart.

It really cemented into your brain that no matter how tough he may look, he still suffers (probably more so than anyone). But, you were also grateful that you were able to see him like that, as it allowed him to start relying on you a little more.

Q-Quality (what is their most dangerous/toxic quality?)

His inability to openly express his emotions. Sure, now he will share with you how he is feeling, but that is with you and ONLY you. He still insists on keeping everything else bottle away from the rest of the world which is a really unhealthy way to deal with things. It’s not that you dislike being there for him, in fact, you appreciate how trusting he is with you. It’s just, what if there comes a time where you aren’t around and he’s in desperate need of someone to confide in?

R-Rejection (how would they react to you rejecting their confession (or the other way around)).

Law would wait until he was 100% certain you returned his feelings to confess to you. So, if you were to reject his confession he would be really confused for a while. He’d let it go because well, everyone has their own reasons – its not his place to tell you how you feel. All he can do is tell you how he feels and then the rest is up to you.

S-Scars (battle or self-inflicted)

He has no self-inflicted scars, and to my knowledge he has no battle scars either. But, his arm did get cut off and then reattached during the Dressrosa arc, so it actually is likely that there is a remaining scar from that (although I’m not certain).

T-Trust (have they ever broken your trust?)

Nope not at all. In fact, the only instance in which he would possibly break your trust, or lie to you, about is when he went to Punk Hazard and sent his crew to Zou. Some would assume that he wouldn’t tell you his plan out of fear of your safety, but that’s not true. He had to tell you. You taught him to be open and honest, and to trust. So that’s exactly what he did.

U-Urge (how badly do they want to see you after you guys separated?)

Law has gotten so comfortable around you that whenever you aren’t there, he gets unbearably anxious. Your presence is soothing, even if he can’t see you, even if he can only hear your voice echoing throughout the Polar Tang, it’s enough to put his mind at ease. So, if you are separated for a while… oh boy does he want to see you badly.

V-Vicious (what do they do when they lash out on you?)

He tends to yell at you. He tells you to “piss off” and that “you’re only being a nuisance right now”, despite you only wanting to help him.

W-Weak (what makes them feel weak how do they try to avoid it?)

Not being able to control things makes Law feel really weak. Weak may not be the right word, but it definitely makes him feel unprepared. He doesn’t like when things are out of his control and he can’t account for things. Which is usually why he always does extensive research and preparation before constructing a well thought out plan.

X-X-ray (what do they hate and show it most obviously?)

Well, I mean other than his obvious hatred of bread, Law also really hates when he works extremely hard on formulating a plan only for it to be completely thrown out of the window by a reckless straw hat wearing captain and his entire crew. (and somehow everything still ends up working out!!! That is the part that frustrates Law the most HAHAH).

Y-Yearn (what is one thing that they want but can’t have?)

One of the only things he’s ever really wanted was for Doflamingo to be taken down. He’s been partially successful in that sense, seeing as Doflamingo is in prison now. However, he wants more than that. He wants Doflamingo to suffer the same way he has.

Z-Zero (what do they do/say in your dying moments?)

It may seem a little out of character but… I believe Law would be borderline desperate/inconsolable. There would be a lot of clinging on to you, begging you not to leave him like everyone else he’s ever loved. He can’t handle another person leaving him, it’s too much. It’s far too much.

He wouldn’t cry (just yet), but his voice would tremble, and his hands would be shaking. His mind would be racing with all sorts of theories and possible ways he could save you. How could he possibly prevent the inevitable?

[rainbowvamp]

Enchanted

Happy Mercelot week my loves! Enjoy a Cinderella love at first sight au. Featuring Merlin in a pretty outfit and infatuated Lancelot!

@mercelotweek fill for "beauty"

——

Merlin looks down at the bit of fabric in his hands. He’s never tried to alter an object this way. He’d cut a bit of Camelot red from one of the cloaks Arthur had sent to be re-hemmed and was just… looking at it. It was washed, but still obviously worn, fraying in places, no matter how he’d tried to mend it. He hadn’t been particularly keen on the red, but it was the only thing he’d had on hand. He certainly wasn’t going to risk any of his own clothes for something that might not work.

Merlin had altered himself before, sure, but he’d gotten stuck that way as often as he’d done it. A mask couldn’t exactly drink a potion and return to it’s original form. So, he had to be very careful and meticulous when he crafted this spell.

The white of his party clothes was incredible, striking, really, compared to all the other clothes he’d ever worn. Cast offs, surely, but they were beautiful. Morgana or even Gwen might know if they were even still in style, but it was meant to be a bit of a lark, this party. Both for him and the other guests in attendance. The others would be in costumes fashioned from older clothing, or clothing made costume by masks. It was supposed to be fun, light hearted, this party, but here Merlin is, overthinking something as simple as a mask.

He murmurs a spell of his own creation and the scrap of fabric, crumpled and pinned to generally resemble a mask, became something gorgeous before his eyes. The fabric was thinner, almost like lace in weight, but stayed stiff in his hand like it had been over starched. The pins had become fine, metallic dots over the eye holes, and the ribbon he’d use to secure it was almost silk like.

It was beautiful, but Merlin could feel the tenuous nature of the spell. It wouldn’t last forever. It might not even last the night. He could feel the threads of magic holding it delicately in this shape, but ready to break apart at any moment.

Well, he’d just have to make his trip to the party short so he wouldn’t risk being found out. These things usually went so far into the night it became morning, but he’d probably have until midnight before the spell wore off and risked exposing him.

If anyone found out a Servant was mingling with these Nobles, he’d be in the stocks for a week. Maybe worse.

Guinevere, who is his dearest friend and closest confidant, has agreed to help him with his hair for tonight, so he sneaks off to Morgana’s rooms, the lady already down at the party, to get her help, mask already in place, just in case anyone should see him.

The palace feels different when he walks around in clothes that belong to a nobleman. The servants he passes bow respectfully, and it makes him uneasy. How can people stand this? He felt so terrible, watching people avert their eyes and how their heads like he or anyone else had any right to their humility.

In Morgana’s rooms, Gwen adjusts his coat and combs his hair back in a way he didn’t think would suit him, but he ends up liking. He tries once more to convince her to come with him, to just steal one of Morgana’s old dresses and wear a veil, but she’s convinced she’ll be found out, and isn’t willing to risk it.

Merlin has no such qualms, and has vowed to take her involvement with this little scheme to the grave. Or the stocks.

“You look wonderful,” She says when she finally lays her brush down. “You’ll be the belle of the ball.”

Merlin rolled his eyes, “Haha, Guinevere. I just want to see how the other half lives for a night. You’re sure you won’t come?”

And now she rolls her eyes. “The lady Morgan and I are much closer than you and Arthur. She’d notice me, even with a mask. Maybe the next one.”

He smiles softly at her. “Definitely the next one. Besides, you’ll still be there. You’ll just have to endure less of the idle dithering of nobles.”

She giggles, “Merlin, you can’t talk about them like that.”

“I can talk about them however I like dressed like this,” He tugged his collar a bit to show off and that set her off again. She covered her mouth to keep their presence hidden and swatted at him.

“Okay, you’ve made your point. Now go, before it’s over.”

“Love you,” he kissed her cheek and she returned the gesture.

“Please don’t get yourself killed.” Which was as good as an I love you too from Gwen.

“No promises. I did try to fight the prince my first day here.”

—-

Merlin takes a second glass of mead in less than half an hour from a passing try. He knows this will be a terrible idea, but he cannot, to save his own life, stand this lot while sober any longer.

Occasionally one of the nobles will smile and greet him, ask him who he is, but for the most part, people are interested in socializing with those they already know, and the few who approach him are obviously uninterested in him as much as they are interested in the connections he might be able to make them.

“I’m dying out here,” he murmurs to Gwen when she’s pauses briefly to grab another tray to pass around lady Morgana’s table.

“I’m so sorry. You poor dear.” She smirks and he smiles back at her.

“Your turn next.”

“Mhmm, after all the fun you’re having, I can’t wait.”

He laughed as she left and his spirits were lifted for the first time all night. He took a final sip of his mead and left it on a table, deciding to try his luck on the dance floor at the same moment that a set of deep brown eyes caught him from across the room.

“Caught” was not an exaggeration. The smoldering, desirous look in the eyes that looked like they might have been looking at him for a while held him like a man entranced. His breath caught in his throat as the man started to make his way toward him.

He was in chain mail, a knight in a cloak that was unmistakably Camelot red. It wasn’t unlike the cloak he’d cut his mask from.

At the reminder, Merlin focused briefly on his mask, whose transformed state was tenuous. It would last a while longer, maybe an hour, maybe longer.

The determined way the knight walked toward him, through the onlookers, partygoers and celebrators was almost overwhelming. No one tonight had looked so intently upon him. He wasn’t sure how to handle it.

His feet seemed to decide how to handle it for him. Thick dark hair that begged to be tugged at and a mouth made for kissing, it drew him in like so few things ever had. Even with the black mask obscuring his face, Merlin can tell he must be beautiful. The cut of his jaw is too perfect for him not to be.

Merlin is stunned by the time they meet, standing obnoxiously still in the middle of the dance floor. The knight bows to him, and while servants bowing to him had made him uncomfortable, this feels formal, and somehow honorable. He holds out his hand when the knight starts to stand, thinking they might shake, but instead Lancelot takes the offered hand and kisses the back of it, eyes trained on Merlin the entire time.

He is grateful for the cover of the mask, with the way that he can feel the blush forming high on his cheek. He wouldn’t want to embarrass himself in front of a knight.

“Hello, My Lord. I am Sir Lancelot.”

Lancelot. He’s heard Arthur speak of him, in passing. An excellent fighter, perhaps as good as the Prince himself. As he stands, Sir Lancelot smiles at him, and Merlin about melts as his stomach flutters and he stands tall, just about eye level with him.

“Hello, Sir Lancelot.” The words are breathier than he means to be, and if Lancelot notices, he gives no indication.

With the slightest bow he asks, “May I have this dance?”

Merlin had been about to dance on his own anyway. Only, Merlin’s never danced any of these formal noble dances, only remembers celebrations in Ealdor, and in the lower town. He isn’t sure of the steps, but Lancelot still hasn’t dropped his hand, and his mouth seems to speak with the same ungiven authority his feet had moved him with.

“Certainly.”

Lancelot takes Merlin’s other hand to place it on his shoulder, and takes Merlin at the waist. It’s what everyone else seems to be doing, and he’s grateful that Lancelot says nothing when they’re pulled so close their chests are nearly flush.

Lancelot starts to move, but Merlin can’t keep time, keeps stumbling over his feet, and Lancelot’s. “I’m afraid I’m not much of a dancer.” Merlin laughs, afraid Lancelot will simply leave, but the man’s returning smile tells another story.

“That’s alright. Just stop thinking so hard about it. I’ll lead.” He pauses briefly to adjust his grip on Merlin’s waist and then Merlin feels the gentle push of the hand there, urging him to move back, forth, left, right, turn, in time with the music. Between Lancelot’s easy leading, and the way his eyes seem to never leave Merlin’s, it’s easy to feel like they are the only two people here, the only ones that matter.

Merlin finds the rhythm eventually, and the gentle coaxing on his hip becomes obsolete. He still misses the feel of Lancelot’s hand in his when they’re suddenly unclasped and grabbing Merlin by the waist, to spin him around with the flourish as the dance came to an end. He laughs, and the answering twinkle in Lancelot’s eyes speaks volumes for how he’s enjoyed himself.

“That wasn’t so bad, was it?” Lancelot asked, and Merlin smiles, letting the knight take his hand and kiss it again.

“I’d say it was the best dance I’ve ever had. Thank you, Sir Lancelot.”

“I aim to please.” Another song started up, and Lancelot raised an eyebrow. “I’m afraid this one is a group dance. Unless you fancy a half dozen partners and more steps than you can count, we might sit this one out.”

Merlin laughed, “I certainly don’t want that. Get a drink with me?” Merlin doesn’t need another drink, but he is parched.

When Lancelot offers his elbow to Merlin, he almost rolls his eyes, but can’t help the grin it illicits. “Such a gentleman.” He smiles, and Lancelot returns it. They take a seat at a nearby table, long since unoccupied in favor of the dancing.

Lancelot serves him mead before a servant can, highly unusual for a knight, as Merlin is well aware. “Thank you,” he waits for Lancelot to serve his own glass and clinks them together before taking a healthy sip from his. The warmth of the joy of Lancelot and the mead mix together, leaving him feeling heady and relaxed.

“I’m afraid I don’t know your name. Is that terrible?” Lancelot asked, and Merlin laughed in response.

“Few would. I’m hardly a common attendee of these sorts of things. I’m Emerys of Ealdor.”

“Such a beautiful name, for a beautiful man,” Lancelot gestured for a servant to bring the tray they were holding, and thanked him graciously as he served both Merlin and himself honey cakes. “I’m afraid I’ve never heard of Ealdor. Is it far from here?”

“Yes. I don’t see it much, anymore. It’s in Essetir, and it is not exactly safe to pass between the two lands. I haven’t been home in many years.”

Lancelot frowned. “I’m sorry to hear that. I too can not return home. I know how lonely that can be.”

Merlin smiled sadly. “Yes. But I do make friends wherever I go, and that helps.”

“I hope perhaps I may one day be counted among them?” Lancelot raies and eyebrow and Merlin’s besotted.

“Easily. So you do not come from Camelot?”

“No. I was a wonderer for a long time, learning sword craft to become a knight of Camelot, one of the noblest lands I know of.”

“One of?” Merlin asked, and he’s honestly curious. He’s used to the way the knights talk about Camelot, like it is perfect, the most wonderful place to live with the most impressive king.

“The King is very noble. He has a heart for the people not all Kings can boast.”

“But?” Merlin pushes, and Lancelot smiles uneasily.

“But not all of the people of Camelot belong in the King’s heart. It is not always my desire to carry out the laws against magic users, if they’ve done no wrong. But I am always loyal to my king.” He took a sip of his mead, pulling gently on the collar of his shirt.

Merlin didn’t know what it felt like to fall in love, but he thought perhaps this might be it. Like falling and being overwhelmed, and wanting nothing more to steal away with someone who appeared perfect in every way.

“I must say I agree.” He said, and Lancelot visibly relaxed. “But like you, I have no ill will toward the King. He does what he believes to be right, and that is all any man can be asked to do.” And perhaps one day he would see that he was not right. Merlin could only hope.

“Yes. Will you be in Camelot long, after the festival?” The question is so obviously probing that Merlin feels a bit of glee at it, even as his heart sinks, because he can’t have this man. Lancelot is a knight of Camelot, and Merlin is a servant.

“I’m afraid not. I leave tonight,” Merlin smiled wanly, and Lancelot’s face mirrors him.

“There’s no possibility of your plans being changed?”

“No. I’m expected somewhere tomorrow. We’ll have to ride through the night to get there.” This is the first true lie Merlin has told all night, and it aches to say. Lancelot cares for magic users, and he’s kind, and he didn’t ask Merlin what connections he had or how he might be helpful to him. He just wanted to have a dance and talk.

He looks away and meets Gwen’s eyes, somewhere over Lancelot’s shoulders. She looks so sad, and he knows he must look the same.

“When might you be back? In Camelot, I mean?”

“I can’t say. It’s only coincidence that brought me here tonight.” This at least, is true. Merlin never could’ve come to this party if not for Gwen coincidentally finding the discarded clothing in the closer of a long disgraced nobleman. The fact that they happened to fit Merlin was also happenstance, and if not for that, he’d never be here. With an hour of Gwen’s help, she’d been able to tailor them nearly to perfect, and he was loathe to admit he looked quite good.

“That is a shame. We must enjoy tonight then.”

“Yes, we must.”

The song changed and Merlin took as delicate a bite as he could manage of his honey cake before taking Lancelot’s hand. “Teach me to dance some more, you’re fantastic at it.”

This brought a smile to Lancelot’s face. “It would be an honor, my lord.”

They take to the dance floor. This dance, whatever it is, is far more complicated than the last one, and Lancelot also stumbles through it occasionally, which makes Merlin feel just a bit better.

“We’ve nearly got it!” Merlin laughed when the music ended, and Lancelot bowed to him again. Merlin is about to ask him for another one when a tall figure suddenly approaches them.

“Mind if I cut in?” Says another knight of Camelot, this one completely disregarding the dresscode and lacking a mask. His long hair came to his shoulder and Merlin would’ve found him incredibly attractive if it weren’t for the fact Lancelot was already the center of his night.

Merlin bows goodbye to Lancelot, thinking this knight has come for his equal, he certainly wouldn’t be the only knight to do so, but then he sees the hard edge of Lancelot’s eyes and is a bit confused.

“My Lord.” The new knight says, and takes Merlin’s hand, sweeping him away from Lancelot without waiting for so much as a “by your leave.”

“I’m Sir Gwaine. You’re a pretty thing,” the knight says, and Merlin doesn’t find this compliment as positive as Lancelot’s.

“I’m sorry if I have no desire to be called an object.” He said stiffly, and Gwaine laughed.

“You’ve got nerve. Lancelot must like that.” Merlin was swept up and turned, his hands barley having time to grip Gwaine’s shoulders and stabilize himself as he was lifted into the air. “I’m sorry to intrude. Sir Lancelot is one of my dearest friends, and a bit of teasing always does him good. Can you see him?” He leaned in to whisper these last words in his ear and Merlin’s eyes start searching the floor for Lancelot.

He’s not on the dance floor, but is watching them with a deep intensity from the spot where they’d sat and ate the song before. “You’ve upset him.”

“Well, you didn’t have to accept.” The man smiled, and Merlin scowled.

“I thought you were asking for Lancelot, not me. Besides, you didn’t give me time to either accept or deny. Just carried me off like some sort of brute.”

“My apologies.” But nothing about his tone seemed apologetic. “However, when Lancelot gets his hands back on you, I think you might just thank me for my little intervention.”

Merlin’s barely following along with whatever steps, but he’s starting to fume. “What is this? Some sort of joke? Do you find that appropriate?”

“I meant no harm,” He smiled, “I swear.” They turned and for a second his eyes focused over Merlin’s shoulder and he grimaced. “But I’m afraid I may have gone too far. I’m going to get it in training tomorrow.” He focused on Merlin again to grin. “But I’m sure I’ll be able to handle it.” The song ended and Merlin just barely put up with a peck on his hand. Before he can pull away, Gwaine holds his hand tight, and Merlin freezes. “Lancelot hasn’t looked this happy for a very long time. I hope you don’t mean to dash his heart.”

Merlin is shocked at the insinuation. “I’ve only just met him. There are no hearts involved.”

“Mmm, you haven’t known Lancelot as long as I have. I assure you, there are.” He made Merlin take his arm and lead him back to the table where Lancelot was sitting. There was a blond knight standing beside him now, leaning in and murmuring something in his ear. “He falls so quick it’s a marvel he’s ever on his feet. But he’s loyal. I wouldn’t want him to get the wrong idea if you mean to disappear.”

“What do you mean?” Merlin asked, stiffening, and Gwaine shrugged.

“I’ve never seen you before. Neither has anyone else I’ve asked. You’re passing through. Who’s to say how you got an invitation, but you’re not likely to return if you’re making no move to introduce yourself to everyone here. I’ve been a wanderer, I know the signs of someone who only intends to stay one night. If you’ve no intention to stay, I wish you’d leave him be.”

“It’s complicated,” Merlin said voice still tense.

“Everything is. My word stands.” They arrive at the table and Lancelot stands, pulling out Merlin’s chair for him, glaring at Gwaine.

“I’m sorry, I’m afraid I couldn’t get enough of our new friend. But he’s all yours now, Lancelot.”

Merlin takes a seat and is relieved for Gwaine to go. Lancelot looks him over like he’s afraid he might’ve been mauled. “Are you alright? I know Gwaine tends to be a bit… forward.”

Merlin laughed, a bit uncomfortable now after what Gwaine’d said. “I’m alright. He wasn’t too forward. Just a bit blunt.”

“Yes, he’s like that.” Merlin followed Lancelot’s gaze to Gwaine, and hoped that Lancelot did beat Gwaine on the training field tomorrow.

The honey cake he’d left is still there, and so he takes another bite. Things like this were so rarely afforded to him he had to force himself not to scarf it down. The cake was soft and crumbled easily in his mouth, giving way to a sweet, delicate flavor. The soft sigh of pleasure from the taste of it all drew Lancelot’s gaze briefly to his lips, and Merlin felt his face heat. “I don’t usually indulge.” He said, as way of explanation, and Lancelot smiled.

“I’m glad you’ve given yourself the pleasure tonight. Camelot’s kitchens are famous.”

“I can see why.” He says, taking another bite of the delicious cake.

“Perhaps they might entice you back.” Lancelot says with a hopeful look, and Merlin swallows.

“Perhaps.” He’s starting to think that maybe this is no good anymore. He’s playing with this man’s heart, pretending to be someone he is not. As much fun as this is, and much as he’s possibly developing a crushing love for Lancelot, this is wrong. They could never be, simply by the virtue of Merlin’s station.

A clock, somewhere far off, strikes and he jumpsin his seat. He checks the magic holding his mask and finds it worryingly close to breaking. He can’t let his face be seen here.

Luckily, he has a readymade excuse.

“Hell.” He murmurs, putting down the cake and being careful to use the napkin to clean his fingers. Had to keep up this act of nobility, no matter how much he’d rather lick the crumbs from his fingers. “I have to go.” He drops the napkin down and pushes his chair back, throwing Lancelot an apologetic look that is more genuine that Merlin meant it to be.

“What? It’s only midnight. Please.” He takes Merlin’s hand as he stands, stopping him from going any further.

“I have to go. My carriage will be waiting. I was suppose to be there ten minutes ago.” Merlin tugs on his hand, but Lancelot holds it, doesn’t let it go.

“Please, I can’t- It’s too soon.” His pleading hurts Merlin, but now that his anxiety has taken over, he knows it’s just a matter of time before the mask becomes a scrap of cloth and falls from his face.

“I’m sorry. I have to go.” He pulls his hand out of Lancelot’s and rushes as much as he dares to the door.

Sir Gwaine blocks his path just as he gets to the door. “Leaving so soon? Can’t I tempt you for another dance?” Merlin can’t read his face, is too worried to even think about trying.

When he looks behind him and sees Lancelot coming for them, he starts to truly panic. He can’t afford a delay.

He turns his face away from Gwaine and mutters a spell to drop a nearby server’s tray. This distracts Gwaine just long enough for Merlin to slip past him and out of the great hall.

He can hear Lancelot coming, calling after him, but he dare not look back. He mutters a second spell to slam the ballroom doors. This will serve both to slow Lancelot’s progress and hide which way Merlin goes goes.

And considering he’s going deeper into, rather than out of, the castle, it’s very important no one sees his retreat.

He slips through the halls, hearing Lancelot’s cries echo and then disappear as he goes toward the castle door, looking for him.

He’ll never find him.

Merlin swipes uselessly at his prickling eyes. He hadn’t wanted to leave Lancelot, but after what Gwaine had said, he couldn’t stay in good conscience. He swallowed hard to try and keep himself collected, and finally ducked into Gaius’ rooms, gracefully empty.

As soon as the door was closed he felt his magic break and the mask become a scrap of fabric. Camelot-red fell into his lap, and he stared at it, thinking of what might have been, and let himself cry.

[charnelhouse]

Re your music selection. I think we all need a Charnel summer playlist now. Def added the song referenced in your latest Loki fic earlier 💕

mmmm ok - i am constantly in a vibe mode and i'll listen to new shit or fucking Oasis or i'll listen to Freak a Leak alone in my room and wonder where the hell i went wrong in middle school. anyway these are just some songs (old and new) that I've been listening to dis summahhhh

hey, ma - bon iver

where do you go - flor

like an animal - rufus du sol

when I'm around you - running touch

bodies - the knocks, muna

holding a heart - toby lightman

about love - marina

save your tears - the weeknd

He^rt - starcadian

if i go, I'm going - gregory alan isakov

smalltown boy - bronski beat

dancin (krono remix) - aaron smith

somebody else - 1975

forever - labrinth

the hand that feeds - nice inch nails

on the floor - perfume egenius

this boys in love - the presets

swear like a sailor - tep no

no place - rufus du sol

slip away - perfume genius

the end - alesso

coud've been us (vance remix) - tyron hapi

used to be - steve aoki

spicy - ty dolla $ign

i miss u - jax jones

troubled paradise - slayyyter

lasting lover - sigala

know your worth - khalid, disclosure

i don't know why - notd

head & heart - joel corry

never gonna like you - bea miller

higher - clean bandit

without me (illenium remix) - halsey

6's to 9's - big wild

sacrifice - bebe rexha

September song - jp cooper

on and on - curtis harding

july - noah cyrus

astronaut in the ocean - masked wolf

ritual - marshmellow

leave before you love me - marshmello, jonas brothers

like gold - loud luxury

flagpole sitta - harvey danger

tick tock - clean bandit, mabel

castles (sam feldt) - freya ridings

walking with a ghost - tegan and sara

violence (rezz remix) - grimes

the business - tiesto

malibu - kim petras

cosmic love - Florence + the machine

silver lining - Andrew rayel

a girl like you - machine gun kelly

save your soul - damned anthem

40 day dream - edward sharpe

somebody to love - molow

gangstas paradise - tolga aslan, sylo

from the start (sonny fodera remix) - biscits

goosebumps - hvme

don't call me up (r3hab remix) - mabel

levitating (kuu remix) - dua lipa

heart on my sleeve - gattuso, laidback luke

time (alan walker remix) - hans zimmer

saving my life - gorgon city

911 (sofi tukker remix) - lady gaga

hold on (ben bohmer remix) - lane 8

mood (remix) - 24kgoldn, Justin bieber

alone together (krewella remix) - fall out boy

the less i know the better - tame impala

[spooky-mister]

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I Am A God - Prologue

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Hey!

Well, I haven't written anything in a while because I've been drowning in film school coursework. B u t we finish in a couple of weeks so I figured why not start a new fic?

I'm actually pretty excited to write this one, so let me tell you about I Am A God.

This is going to be a AU chapter fic crossing over FD3 and Jennifer's Body, throwing the characters of the former into the conflict of the latter. Some chapters may draw more heavily from Jennifer's Body (for example, this prologue is a pretty by-the-numbers retelling of Needy's opening scene), however other chapters may deviate and I will work to add nuance through the characters and their place in their universe.

I will try to keep this fic updated weekly!

Also off the bat, I would like to warn that this fic will include violence, sexual references (nothing explicitly NSFW) and major character deaths throughout. I will include any specific triggers before each chapter but please let me know if I miss out a trigger you would like me to add :)

Anyway, without further ado, on with the fic.

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I Am A God - Prologue (1/12)

Fandom: Final Destination 3/Jennifer's Body

Pairing: Various

Chapter Word Count: 1,078

Chapter Potential Triggers: Physical violence, solitary confinement

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Hell is a teenage goth.

And well, with that pretence, Erin supposed she wasn't much better.

The rough fuzz of wool grazed the ex-goth’s fingers as she fed it through the cross of popsicle sticks nesting in her palm - threading a craft project she granted little attention. Her eyes were vacant, fixed on the hatched bars of her one window and darting around as if following a fly. Without her old mask of Dollar Store make-up, Erin looked particularly tired. Exhausted, even. Drained… And her dark ginger hair clashed repulsively with her mandatory orange jumpsuit.

Erin Ulmer had been housed in McKinley, Pennsylvania’s one correctional facility for a total of two months now - barely a scratch on her total sentence. She bet they wished they could kick her out sooner. She was an outcast - even here. Quiet and meditative despite her reputation amongst the doctors and guards. She was a Kicker with a capital ‘K’ - even said so in her file. She liked to think of herself as a fighter.

She had been assigned a one-window room with a façade of cleanliness - the white walls and linoleum floor tainted by small cracks and stubborn stains. It wasn't all bad though. At least on the outside, she had her fans.

Her floor was littered with colourful cards and boxes, idols and fuzzy stuffed animals. Sure, they were mostly from creeps and clergymen, but… They were a small mercy to tape her down when she felt loose around the edges.

The girl’s left eye twitched as her thoughts were cut short by the sharp, sudden rap of knuckles against her door frame. She didn’t need to turn around - she knew who it was. At least, she knew what to expect from the gleaming white lab coats and obnoxious ID badges. It didn’t really matter which one was giving her the spiel today.

“Your mealtime started five minutes ago, Erin,” the lab coat spoke, deep, male and tired.

“Suck it, Doctor Feelgood," Erin croaked through chapped lips, but she could tell the guy wasn't going anywhere. She sighed and glanced over her shoulder, giving him a saccharine smile. "I mean, thank you."

God, she was going to rot in here.

At least mealtimes let the chains a little looser. Breakfast was her favourite. Just Erin, a barred window and a fresh frosted cherry Toast ’Em.

Typically, she was left alone to enjoy her peace and quiet.

This morning, she wasn’t so lucky.

Erin caught sight of the nutritionist before they spoke a word, narrowing cold, blue eyes as her body language tightened. The woman’s smile was patronising, her expression one of a parent deciding the best way to scold a difficult child. Erin was used to it by now. God, gag her with a spoon.

“Good morning, Erin,” the nutritionist cooed on her approach, leaning over slightly so that she came to the girl’s eye level. The woman made Erin feel nauseous, weathered, leathery skin dancing on her jowls and the stench of morning coffee still thick on her breath. She spoke to Erin with a sickly condescension, tight lips pulled taut in a false grin. “Just one Toast ‘Em today?”

“I like Toast ‘Ems,” Erin murmured with as much energy she could muster… Which was not a lot by any stretch of the imagination. She had no patience for the doctor’s interrogations, her cadence monotonous and dull. The woman didn’t seem too pleased by the brevity of her response, over-plucked eyebrows knitting together.

“That’s good,” she tested. “But I’m not sure one Toast ‘Em can provide sufficient energy during your day.”

Jesus Christ, could she shut her mouth for ten minutes? Twenty? Perhaps the whole day. Anything to spare Erin from the insufferable drawl she suffered day in. Day out. The doctor could take her clipboard and ram it up her ass. In fact, Erin would do it for her. Frustration built and built and built as Erin’s short fuse began to dwindle and hiss. She had no patience left after what she had experienced - and definitely no patience for this. She wanted to be left alone. She wanted to be free of this fucking crapshack. But while she was here, she’d just have to re-route that frustration into some… Healthier outlets. Healthy for her, at least.

“I recommend more complex carboh-”

The nutritionist didn’t get the time to deliver her advice before Erin got to her feet and launched her foot forward, cracking hard against the woman’s face and sending her stumbling and spiralling back into chairs and tables alike.

Blood oozed from the woman’s newly mangled nose as she landed on the ground with a thud, the ecstatic roar of Erin’s fellow prisoners drowning out the groans and hiccups of pain.

“I recommend you shut the fuck up!” Erin bayed, her previous docile nature stripped away in an instant to reveal a picture of rage - red hair wild and teeth bared. She inhaled sharply, gathering the salty taste of mucus in her mouth before firing it as a projectile into the doctor’s pain-twisted face.

Of course, it didn’t take long for the cafeteria guards to intervene.

A tall, burly man grabbed Erin under the arms, causing the teen to squirm and scream and kick out her strong legs like a caged mustang. Another guard - scrawny and puny compared to the one behind her - earned a rightful kick to the stomach when coming around to grab at her feet. But she couldn’t fight forever, she was exhausted. So with the fanfare of her shrieking and whooping inmates to play her out, her legs were grabbed and she was rushed away flailing and screaming.

She knew where they were taking her. Erin was intimately familiar with solitary confinement.

She hit the concrete with a resentful grunt, immediately righting herself and shuffling to the far wall - knees pulled tight. Her chest hammered and her head spun, limp, lifeless locks of ginger hair framing the fury in her face. She saw the light of the adjacent hallway dim as the door was swung shut, darkness coming with the harsh clang of metal.

Erin screamed until her throat threatened to rupture. Until she succumbed to her exhaustion and slumped against the wall.

She hadn’t always been so cracked. Up until two months ago, she’d been relatively normal… Or, as close to normal as you can get when masquerading as the town’s token gothic outcast.

But that had been before the killings began.

Before her best friend - ex-best friend - made the worst mistake of their lives.

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[min-hoax]

Hi!!!! I’m the #sweetanon!!!!!! Hello, again, and omfgggg I saw ur reply and when I saw “will upload for you” I literally yelled ur so sweeeeeeeeeet 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 I will wait like forever or sumn for any one shot to Angel Mask, it’s just that good 💅🏻💅🏻💅🏻

Again, I’m so excited you’re re-uploading your stories, it’s always nice to see authors revisiting their work and just making it even better, I hope you stay on here for a rlly long time writing amazing pieces of work, regardless of their genre/style! 😽

got me blushing up in here and that’s a crime!!! u now must pay for your actions sweet anon.

I will upload that one shot tonight or maybe earlier! Again, thank you for waiting so long And for being patient. <3