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calitsnow · 2 years ago

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Ranpo's parents and their influence on his life + Ranpo’s anger + how Fukuzawa gained Ranpo's trust

The second episode of Bungo Stray Dogs Season 4 was released today and it continues the adaptation of my favorite novel from the series; the one depicting the meeting between Ranpo and Fukuzawa and the founding of the agency.

And I have so much to say but let's start with the topic I want to talk about the most:

The red thread of this post will be: Ranpo's parents

Unfortunately their importance has been diminished in the episodes and I can not help but tell myself that it is a significant loss for the understanding of the character of Ranpo but also many other themes and events that were closely linked to them.

Through this writing I will address four points:

I/The identity of Ranpo’s parents and their relationship with him

II/The influence of Ranpo’s parents in his life following their premature departure

III/The breaking point

IV/The birth of Ranpo’s blind trust in Fukuzawa

So be prepared for a long but (I hope) interesting ride

Whereas the first episode was based on introducing us to the past characters of Ranpo and Fukuzawa, especially introduce us to their encounter and to set up the different elements for the rest of the story.

This second episode had also a clear theme: the anxieties and the feeling of alienation from the rest of the world that gnawed at Ranpo.

But also the how of why Fukuzawa chose to lie to him and make him believe he was an skill user and why Ranpo believed him.

And these are very important elements to the character of Ranpo, because it is indeed this meeting and the words of Fukuzawa that gave him such a blinding faith in him and I would even go so far as to say, that shaped this haughty and superior behaviour that Ranpo showed at the start of the manga.

I'm not saying that Ranpo wasn't like that before, but he was so; in a much more moderate and silent way because of his parents' words (we'll come back to that later) and what stands out above all in Ranpo's character (either at the time of the founding of the agency or at the moment present in the manga) is his childish character coupled with a hint of haughtiness and an intellect superior to all.

So far, all we knew was that it was Fukuzawa who had given his glasses to Ranpo, who had revealed to him the fact that he is an "ability user" (even if it is a lie) and that he had founded the armed detective agency so that Ranpo can fully utilize his gift without fearing the outside world.

But it's never been made clear why Ranpo and Fukuzawa's bond was so strong, and we'll later learn that Fukuzawa didn't just create a safe space for our great detective, but was also the one who saved him from the image of a world that was breaking him a little more every day.

I have sometimes read posts that speculated on what Ranpo could have become if it hadn't been Fukuzawa who had found him but Mori for example, and often the conclusion is clear, either Ranpo would have ended up even more broken and frightened of the world he lived in or had he been influenced by someone who, like Fukuzawa, understood Ranpo's true potential but tricked him into using it for manipulative and scheming purposes, he would have been shaped to be someone like Fyodor or Dazai.

We could often witness as the manga progressed that Ranpo lost to Fyodor because, firstly, he was facing a very intelligent opponent but also because he is not able to set up and foresee all the stratagems which pass by the manipulation of the emotions of the men, whereas Fyodor and Dazai are specialists in it.

And this is due to the fact that Fukuzawa (and his parents, we will also come back to this later) did not educate Ranpo to use his intelligence for this, but to solve mysteries and have a strategic vision which is based on data / facts.

However, that also doesn't mean that Ranpo would be unable to become like Fyodor or Dazai, although he could never match them in their domain. He has already demonstrated that he can do so by manipulating Mushitarō Oguri into surrendering to the police.

Anyway, I digress a bit and I ended up not talking about the episode anymore.

But it was only to show that these episodes are very important to better understand the character of Ranpo and how he came to be who he is today.

Especially to explain the behavior of superiority that Ranpo adopts which can annoy some at the beginning of the manga because its origin is not clearly explained and can pass for simple arrogance linked to his childish behaviour.

Even though the theme of this birth of feelings of superiority and the theme of the fears related to a Ranpo who fails to understand his environment and who is not able to find someone who seems to understand him were addressed during this episode; some equally important themes/elements were unfortunately not brought up by the latter and I find that’s a shame, especially when they are such important elements in Ranpo's life and that manga/anime only cannot know unless they did research on the light novels.

To be fair; I think that the episodes do a fairly good job of adapting the novel but unfortunately; adapting a novel with so much informations into three episodes is a tedious task and certain elements must be skimmed over or deleted to keep the essential that is here, namely the meeting between Ranpo and Fukuzawa, Ranpo's discovery of his gift through Fukuzawa and the founding of the agency.

Ranpo's parents are a detail in all this, a way to deepen his character but they are not necessary to the story, only their death is.

But I still think it's a shame to have cut their involvement in their son's development because it's not just the loss of his parents that fractured Ranpo, it's also the vision they gave him of the outside world which led to his feeling of alienation.

Many people might wonder why Ranpo couldn’t figure out on his own that he was smarter than the rest unfortunately the episodes didn’t really try to give an answer.

I therefore wish to clarify things for the anime and manga only who would not have had the opportunity or the desire to read the novel 3.

I/ The identity of Ranpo's parents and their relationship with him

« What was your father’s name?”

When Ranpo told Fukuzawa, he was slightly taken aback. It was a name even Fukuzawa knew. There wasn’t a soul who worked in his business who didn’t. The man was a legendary detective. The “Headless Officer” case, the “Moonlight Phantom,” the “Cow Head Incident”—he helped solve several difficult cases that shook the nation.

His powers of deduction and observation were so extraordinary that people called him the Clairvoyant.

He was highly respected and praised. »

Even if in the anime Ranpo informs Fukuzawa that his parents are no longer of this world, he does not go further in his explanations and the subject is quickly forgotten while in the book we learn more about their identities.

We learn that Ranpo's father was also a great detective, which in a way can serve as an explanation for Ranpo's exceptional intellect, the apple does not fall far from the trees, especially when we learn later who was his mother.

Above all, we learn that Ranpo's father was a well-known figure in the world and that he was respected everywhere as a great detective, this public image may have harmed/endangered the Edogawa family and the cause of their deaths was perhaps not so accidental. But here, it remains speculation.

Ranpo then continues with new information about his mother.

« He probably wasn’t amazing enough to be known to the public or anything, though. He could never beat my mom when it came to solving mysteries or reasoning, so she always got the upper hand on him when they argued back home. »

Here what is interesting, in addition to the information about his mother, is that Ranpo, unlike the rest of the world, does not consider his father as someone exceptional and whose intelligence, surely, did not allow him to be someone famous.

Which is so telling about Ranpo's skewed worldview and which is a clue to the true situation he really finds himself in:

« Ranpo knew the secretary was the criminal the moment he walked into the office, but the reason he didn’t speak up was because in his head, he thought the adults in the room all knew that as well.{…}

Or perhaps it was because he had simply lived a sheltered life in a bubble with his parents and no one else »

Ranpo grew up isolated from others, alongside geniuses but he didn't grow up with this vision of them, seeing them as normal people with a banal level of intelligence, because that's how his parents wanted him to see them. (We will come back to this later)

Second information: Ranpo's mother was also if not smarter than his father, which confirms to the reader that Ranpo grew up surrounded by eminences grises on the same level as his.

However, unlike her husband, she was not a public figure.

Third information: either Ranpo's father hid his activity from him and managed to hide his reputation at home or he retired to live a less dangerous life and not endanger his family with all the enemies he could have gain over time, hiding in anonymity.

« He hated the countryside. He hated the people, the school, and essentially everything else there. »

Moreover, we learned that Ranpo was brought up in the countryside, facilitating his isolation from the rest of the world, but even if he was isolated it seems that Ranpo still felt this feeling of ostracization from the others.

Even if Ranpo mostly talk about his inability to understand the world after the death of his parents, we cannot rule out the idea that Ranpo did not get along with children of his age because of his different reasoning from theirs.

If this is true we can conclude that even before the death of his parents, Ranpo felt misunderstood and left out, being unable to understand others and to act like everybody excepted him to.

However he had the presence of his parents that allowed him to live without worrying about that. Their presence and ability to think like him, allowed Ranpo to feel normal in a world that didn't seem that much to him.

In sum, Ranpo's situation can be summed up by one of the sentences from the novel:

« A naive only child raised by genius parents… »

Here is the beautiful family picture that the book paints for us, but that's not all:

So we know that Ranpo's parents were intelligent, his father was respected, but they seemed to live far enough away from the rest of the world that Ranpo might not be able to realize their off-the-charts intelligences.

But there is another characteristic to describe the Edogawa family: they loved and cared deeply for each other.

Well, in truth, we can't really know what the relationship was between Ranpo's parents, but even if he mentions "arguing where his mother had the upper hand", I think it was heated arguments between two smart people trying not to lose to each other, nothing too bad anyway.

What matters most is that they ensured the education and development of their son, at least until their death.

Also, the way Ranpo seems to talk about his parents doesn't hint at a relationship driven by tension.

And it is made clear throughout the book that Ranpo was raised with care and love by his parents and that he loved and respected them deeply.

« You’re special, Ranpo, and if you so desire, you will become a greater mind than even your parents.”

“As if.” Ranpo immediately shot down the claim. “My parents were amazing. There’s no surpassing them to reach the top because they were the top. Neither of them ever told me once that I had a gift, and I believe them. »

« But Ranpo’s parents did that with their extraordinary minds. What was such a feat, if not unconditional love? »

« The only thing he liked was his parents. »

Ranpo often mentions his parents throughout the book and one can clearly feel the respect he had for them and feel that Ranpo out of love and respect for his parents is applying everything they have teach him: Because his mother taught him not to place himself above others, it is unthinkable for him to put himself above someone else, especially when his interlocutor is an adult.

And above all, Ranpo is incapable to place himself above his parents because they were the only people who were ever able to understand him (more on that later) and it’s because he loved and respected them so much that Ranpo can’t imagine going against their teachings.

And it was this lovingly constructed cocoon that was meant to protect Ranpo from the outside world.

« The protective wall his parents created was thick.

That wall protected Ranpo from a world of ordinary people who would fear and fail to understand him, yes{…} »

But unfortunately not everything went as planned.

« {…}but it was also what rendered him unable to step into the outside world. »

II/ The influence of Ranpo's parents in his life following their premature departure

But what were the consequences of this isolated education and stopped too abruptly?

Main effects can emerge from this:

Ranpo's parents "normalized" his level of intelligence, making him feel like his brain capacity was the one of any child or adult. But why? It is true that, one could wonders why Ranpo's parents sought to educate Ranpo in the most total unawareness of his gifts?

The answer is all found in the book:

« So his father knew, after all. He understood that Ranpo possessed an extraordinary gift. That was why he sealed it away. He didn’t want Ranpo to go astray, to ever hurt others and make the world his enemy. »

« His father wanted Ranpo to learn virtue and what’s right just like any ordinary person until he had grown up with good judgment and knowledge. »

All is said. Ranpo's parents were aware of his gift and what it entailed; and they knew the danger that the world could represent for their son if he failed to understand and adapt to its workings.

This is why they sought to hide Ranpo's gift, so that over time, when their son would have matured; he would be able to understand and adapt to the world despite his difference.

However, his parents weren't just doing it for the world, they were doing it for their son first: Ranpo's gift is still a unique talent that many might seek to use but above all they didn't want Ranpo to find himself alone because of his difference.

Why didn't they tell Ranpo that he was smarter than the others?

Well, the situation is quite complex, but from what I understand, Ranpo's parents did not want him to feel excluded from the rest of the world and wanted him to grow up like an ordinary child, so as not to accentuate this feeling of "being different" that Ranpo will have to deal with all his life. They also wanted Ranpo to know how to be humble so that, what he manages to see and divulge is not seen as arrogance.

Moreover, explaining to a child that he is special and different is not easy, because even at 14 years old, Ranpo does not understand why he is the one who had to be different.

« Besides, why would only I be special? There are so many people in the city, so why would I be the only special one? »

« But even if this hypothesis were true, how would one explain that to this kid? “You’re special. You have something that others don’t.” But why? And how different exactly was he? How could it be proved? »

Depending on one's feelings, it may seem more like a twist of fate, a curse, forever preventing him from understanding others and the workings that seem logical to anyone else.

A real feeling of bitterness and frustration coupled with loneliness can arise from all this, especially when others do not make the effort to try to understand in return.

Explaining to a child that he should not act according to what seems logical/correct to him without a concrete explanation is a complicated situation, especially when Ranpo's parents were able to understand him without him needing to adapt. I think Ranpo’s parents didn’t want him to hide his talent but they also din’t want him to feel the pressure that come along with it.

Especially since the difference, when you are a child, is not very well received by other children. They will not try to understand what seems strange to them.

A child does not admire another child for his intelligence, especially if it’s a child who cannot understand others and communicate as expected of him, he will just see him as a weirdo.

Ranpo's father has therefore created a cocoon woven of lies or at least omissions about reality to let Ranpo mature for the time it takes, until he is ready to accept the truth about himself and act accordingly/ appropriately for others to understand.

« He was protecting him, creating a transparent cocoon to protect his extraordinary gift from this strange world. Ranpo’s parents raised him like an ordinary child.

How difficult it must have been to convince him that the world he saw was normal and nothing he knew was anything other than common sense. »

He did not want his child, because of his gift, to have to live a childhood filled with stares full of misunderstandings and judgments. Ranpo didn't deserve to be blamed for that.

« Ranpo, still naive, may have fallen into that trap, but he did not deserve to be blamed. Nevertheless, Ranpo was an extreme case. Although he possessed such extraordinary powers of observation, he didn’t think he was special. Why? Was it his parents’ fault? Was it because he lived a sheltered life with parents who had minds that rivaled his? »

However, the death of Ranpo's parents prevented them from seeing to the hatching of this cocoon and Ranpo was therefore never made aware of his talent and what it involved. Forcing him to live with an idea of a reality that, now, only oppressed him with its lack of logic, which no one seemed to notice.

« But long before Ranpo had fully matured—far before Ranpo was ready for the world—they departed this life. An immature yet gifted larva was stripped of his cocoon and abandoned. »

The only people who could understand him and answer him satisfactorily had just tragically disappeared without leaving him with anything concrete to hold on to. (Apart from the job at the police station but no one there was able to explain to him why the world was so strange).

Which means that Ranpo has kept the vision that his parents have always taught him and transmitted of the world: you are like everyone else and everyone is like you.

But this vision did not help - because where it acted as a protective barrier in his childhood (a barrier maintained by his parents), once immersed in the middle of the active world — this sea without landmarks — at only 14 years old, this vision represented more of an anchor that prevented Ranpo from moving forward.

« He didn’t understand others because he didn’t think he was special. He didn’t think he was special because he didn’t understand others, which only confirmed what his parents had told him. It was unyielding logic that fed off each other{…} »

He couldn't destroy what had been the truth to him for 14 years, especially when that truth was taught to him by the only people he loved and who understood him. And that truth was the only thing keeping his head above water.

And so Ranpo lived in a world where he thought everyone else could see what he saw but everyone pretended not to see because that's what adults do.

And we arrive to a very important new point in this blockage that Ranpo has towards himself and his own abilities; Ranpo is still a kid

He lived all his life isolated with his parents but that was enough, but here he is, released in the middle of the jungle at only 14 years old, in a world that he thinks he understands but which constantly sends back an illogical image to him.

« However, Ranpo still hadn’t realized that what he saw was only visible to him and him alone. He was still immature in that sense. »

Ranpo is a teenager, a very intelligent one yes, but still a teenager, of course he will show immaturity and not correct himself, because even if he suffers from it, it does not make sense for him to do that.

« If a kid like me was able to figure it out, then surely you and the police already noticed a long time ago, right? My mother never got tired of telling me, ‘You’re still just a kid.’ And I agree with her. I really don’t understand what adults are thinking. Sometimes I even doubt they know anything, but that’s not even possible.” »

« “You’re still just a kid.” Of course you don’t understand adults. Because adults are smarter than you. Is that what she meant? It’s not hard to understand why Ranpo’s parents drilled that into his head, at least to a certain degree, and yet… »

Ranpo fails to understand adults and we see that he has already suspected that adults do not see the same things as him but it was an impossible idea because the latter had been taught to him by his mother. This lie, which was meant to protect him, prevented him from accepting his hypotheses. Also the only adult example that Ranpo had in his life was his parents and his parents understood him, his parents were as smart as him, his parents knew. So of course, since this is the only image he has of adults, he cannot imagine another one.

It is as if he only knew the color red but was asked to visualize blue, impossible.

And the fact that the others around him are adults and he is a teenager doesn't help because his mother taught him that adults know best.

A child cannot fully understand adults because he is not smart enough to do so yet, there are some things that you only understand as an adult.

Ranpo's parents must have wanted to instill this value in him so that Ranpo would listen to them growing up and know that even if sometimes his life can diverge, an adult has experiences that allow him to better respond to a situation or how to behave.

But this vision of the adult should surely also help Ranpo to know how to behave if he had to face another adult, he should not be pretentious but respect him so as not to be scolded for no reason.

Especially since Ranpo was educated by his parents to go/fit with the others and to adapt his behavior (so as not to offend those who listen to him and keep a low profil).

« Uh… My father always said, ‘One day, you’re going to surpass your mother and me, and you’re going to win the admiration of all those around you. But now’s not that time. Stay humble and keep your silence. Always be modest. Just quietly observe and don’t hurt others with what you discover.’

…Or something like that. I don’t really know what he meant, though.” »

« My mother told me to never look down on others. »

Ranpo's parents taught him to be silent and they associated this silence with the respect and humility that children should show towards adults. This mechanism was still intended to protect Ranpo and his talent but this mechanism was meant to disappear over time, it was simply to help Ranpo not to make the world his enemy until he was big and mature enough to understand and accept his difference. But his parents were never able to break this mechanism (because they died before they could), leaving him with a defense mechanism that only increases his feeling of odds with others, which is what his parents had done everything to avoid.

"What good would that have done?" Ranpo replied as if he was offended. “You're all adults. Do something about it yourself. What good is asking a kid what he thinks is going to happen? Besides, everyone gets mad when I state the truth.” »

“There it was again. Fukuzawa felt as if something was off. “I have absolutely no idea what adults are thinking,” the kid said—and something about how that came across seemed vaguely wrong. »

Ranpo thinks it's normal for him not to understand adult behavior because he's still a child and he makes sure to remember that. In the novel, Ranpo often refers to himself as a child, because that is what he is, but he also very often puts this word in parallel with "adult", indicating the clear and sharp border that there is in his head. Of course Ranpo think this is the only difference capable of explaining why he does not see the world like the others because it’s the only one he found.

Because of all this, Ranpo doesn't understand others and goes through what his parents always wanted to prevent:

“Most people would probably chalk it up to powers of deduction, but…even if the average person couldn’t understand him, surely the reverse wouldn’t be possible, that he couldn’t understand them? There was a decisive discretion. »

"He didn't understand others because he didn't think he was special. He didn't think he was special because he didn't understand others, which only confirmed what his parents had told him. »

This vicious circle in which Ranpo has found himself trapped is a trap from which he cannot escape on his own because nothing proves to him that he is trapped because no one tries to understand and/or no one succeeds. And his inability to understand other people prevents him from thinking that he would be different, that he could be smarter because who considered himself intelligent if he couldn't solve an equation that everyone else did seem to know how to solve.

All of which brings us to our third point.

III/ The breaking point

“Ranpo was all alone. After losing his parents, he was thrown into a confusing world to wander without a path. He had no one to turn to and nowhere to go. He was merely surviving, existing. »

This sentence sums up very well the true state in which Fukuzawa found Ranpo, even if it was not apparent at first glance.

Ranpo was alone and this loneliness hurt him, broke him a little more every day and no one seemed to be able to understand him or answer him without coming into confrontation with his very precise idea of the reality that his parents had sown in him.

And that's where Fukuzawa's intervention comes in and saves Ranpo from a mental breakdown and the birth of, I think, a real hatred for everything around him.

We will now go into the beginning of an analysis of the parental figure parallel between Fukuzawa and Ranpo's parents and how they are both opposite and similar.

But also an analysis of the adaptation of the anime compared to the light novel.

“Ranpo’s eyes were ablaze with fury. “Seriously, why? It makes no sense to me. I don't understand anyone! Why are adults like this? Why is everyone like this? Someone, just tell me why!” he shouted. This outburst didn't just come out of nowhere. Doubt and stress had been swelling inside him for the longest time, waiting to explode. “I don't understand what anyone's thinking! I'm scared! It feels like I'm surrounded by monsters! It doesn't matter what I say—nobody understands me! My parents were the only ones who did, and they're dead!” This time, he was screaming—an anguished lamentation aimed at nowhere with clear animosity in his eyes”

This is how Ranpo's breaking point is translated in the book; a real cry of rage, a call for help filled with despair that can only be expressed with animosity and anger because the situation has been going on for so long, without any improvement, that only frustration can result.

And we can only understand: Ranpo was alone but and felt misunderstood since forever and the accidental death of his parents did not help to accept this situation.

We clearly feel a rage, a hatred buried in Ranpo that took root a long time ago and finally bloomed.

It's a last cry for help filled with raw, honest sentiments from a teenager who doesn't understand what he's doing wrong.

In the anime this distress isn't expressed in the same way, first because we don't really have time to dwell on all of Ranpo's emotional struggle as much as in the book and we don't have time either to explain how this pain is also related to the death of his parents, because the anime didn't show their importance in his education and growth as an individual.

In the anime, this cry for help comes more like a stifled cry, a surplus of emotion that fails to express itself. You can almost see it as a mechanism that Ranpo adopted; he wants to express what he feels but does not know how to make himself understood, so he is only able to collapse into almost complete silence with clenched teeth, relying only on himself; but he comes to the same conclusion again and again:

« "If there's a skill user here, save me! If there's an angel, then save me! Why must I be alone?! Why do I have to live alone in the middle of a bunch of monsters?” »

Ranpo wants to be saved no matter by whom and despite that all he sees are monsters around him.

And that pressure, those fears, that feeling of not understanding, that has built up over time is so strong in the book.

It's alluded to in a subtle way by all of Ranpo's mentions of his past failures to fit in with the rest. Until it has become too much to bare and take the form of a cry of rage during the opera.

I find that in the book, the oppression of this life that Ranpo has been leading for almost a year is very well illustrated and really supports the character's lost/desperation and how Ranpo was really a bomb ready to explode.

What makes this outburst of anger even more striking is that it is pure and genuine. It's a raw emotion that Ranpo can't express otherwise.

"This outburst didn't just come out of nowhere. Doubt and stress had been swelling inside him for the longest time, waiting to explode. “I don't understand what anyone's thinking! I'm scared! It feels like I'm surrounded by monsters! It doesn't matter what I say—nobody understands me! My parents were the only ones who did, and they're dead!” »

We really feel the broken state in which Ranpo is:

Ranpo has tried to accept himself and understand his environment but despite his best efforts nothing seems logical to him and the others only make fun of him.

This idea is all the sadder when we see how much the death of his parents and the resulting loneliness affects Ranpo on a daily basis: he is a child who does not know that he is special and who has lost the only ones capable of understanding him and giving him this sense of normality and all he feels now is that it's his fault.

Here Ranpo is just the image of a scared child crying for the comfort of his parents.

In the anime, I feel much less this aspect of total rupture; in the novel Fukuzawa compares Ranpo's situation to him being on the edge of an gulp, ready to jump at any moment.

However, even if this comparison is very accurate, it is not really what stands out in the anime.

Ranpo doesn't really seem angry with the outside world, he seems more scared and lost, suffocating in this illogical daily life.

The anime mostly kept this aspect and his impression of being misunderstood by the world, but it didn't really keep the frustration that Ranpo had been able to accumulate, because this frustration takes on more meaning if they had time to talk about Ranpo's parents and the education they gave their sons.

Ranpo doesn't understand the outside world?

In the anime it's because it's a world he had never known before the death of his parents, it's the world of adults and it's a world that seems illogical to him and this absence of logic frightens him, but there is no anger, why?

Because the past vision of Ranpo’s world has not been broken (or at least the situation has not been presented like that to the viewer).

Whereas in the novel Ranpo found himself in the middle of a strange and illogical world whereas until now it made perfect sense thanks to the presence of his parents. So it's easier to understand why in the book Ranpo is reacting angrily, it's because he's frustrated at not understanding what he understood so far and feels like everyone is laughing at him out of pure malice.

I can't say that I find the adaptation bad either, because even if it removed all this feeling of anger in Ranpo, I admit that the anime replacement of it with a feeling of a suffocating helplessness is pretty interesting.

It fills the most important spot; letting us understand just how suffocating was the life he led.

They're just two different expressions of his emotions and two different images of his character.

In the book, Ranpo tries to understand others and fails but he doesn’t accept his failures and it results in anger.

In the anime, Ranpo tries to understand others but fails and therefore forces himself to live with this anguish even it suffocates him until he breaks down.

Two different stages but which stem to an event necessary for the development of Ranpo: his breakdown.

Ranpo can no longer live with such a reality

Ranpo's parents also served to create anger in Ranpo and for me that anger seemed so important to show because it tells us so much about Ranpo and the pressure that has been on his shoulders, it is a part of him . And this anger is all the more bitter when you know that it's just the anger of a 14 year old teenager, it seems so legitimate and you can't help but have empathy for Ranpo because even for us all of this seems too unfair

However, no one told him, explained to him that his view of the world is wrong and that none of this is his fault.

Nobody knew or took the time to do so, before Fukuzawa arrived

That's why Fukuzawa takes on this role of father figure in Ranpo's eyes, because he fills the role that his parents couldn't assumed until the end.

The parallel is so strong and so much clearer in the book because Ranpo's parents are constantly mentioned and paralleled with what Fukuzawa is trying to do: help Ranpo to accept himself and live normally.

I think removing the scenes mentioning Ranpo's parents is a loss, since they are the ones who had the most influence on his life and they are the ones who made Ranpo think the way he does in the past. Especially the mention of the role of Ranpo's parents in his life and his development because they were also supposed to be a parallel with the role (of parent) that Fukuzawa will decide to take on in the life of the great detective and all this parallel was supposed to support that idea.

Which bring us to the last point of this post:

IV/ The birth of Ranpo's blind trust in Fukuzawa

The problem I have with the anime is that everything is very fast. But really very fast, because unfortunately we don't have time to dwell on what can be seen as detail / bonus.

Just as proof of this, the absence of Ranpo's tantrum from the theater is mostly, I think, a way to simplify the after discussion with Fukuzawa and gain time.

In the book Fukuzawa doesn't calmly lead Ranpo out of the room and the two leave with some annoyance towards each other.

The most noticeable difference is that Fukuzawa doesn't know how to help Ranpo right away, and it's not as easy for him to find the right words and solution to appease the young boy.

But mostly, Ranpo doesn't trust Fukuzawa so easily. Because even if he is surely one of the only adults who is ready to listen to him and try to understand him, Ranpo is not going to sweep away everything he believes in just because a “stranger” suddenly explains to him how it works.

Fukuzawa must gain Ranpo's trust before he is able to change him. And I find this scene so important because we see that Fukuzawa did not just arrive with a ready-made solution and easely eclipse everything Ranpo's parents built.

We learn that, this so important trust that Ranpo shows in the manga towards him, this loyalty was won by Fukuzawa and does not simply come from the fact that Fukuzawa has offered glasses and "his gift" to Ranpo

This scene makes us understand why Ranpo gives so much importance to Fukuzawa. Because even if he is the one who found a solution to his problem, he was, above all, able to gain a position of guidance figure, of a parental figure in the eyes of Ranpo.

He took the place of his parents.

But then why isn't this scene illustrated in the anime, when it explains and complicates Fukuzawa and Ranpo's relationship?

Well because of the lack of time, the absence of Ranpo's anger and the abscence of the "presence" of his parents in this conversation.

“My parents were amazing. There's no surpassing them to reach the top because they were the top. Neither of them ever told me once that I had a gift, and I believe them.” »

““Don’t think you can control me with a few compliments.” Ranpo slightly warned his gaze. »

In the book, Fukuzawa tries to get Ranpo to understand the truth by bringing up his parents but it doesn't work as Ranpo only sees it as compliments and more lies.

Ranpo loved his parents and his parents loved him, so it is very difficult to destroy what they have built, especially when Ranpo has only known Fukuzawa for two days in front of his parents who raised him with this love for 14 years.

Still symbolizing the importance of his parents in his life and the influence they have even after their deaths

“He was stubborn. The protective wall his parents created was thick. »

"If Fukuzawa didn't use just the right amount of force, then the damage would be irreparable. »

Fukuzawa must then turn to something else and he must above all be careful not to cross the line, which could break Ranpo.

And even though Ranpo is suspicious, Fukuzawa manages to offer him the start of a new perspective:

“Have you ever thought the people around you were stupid? That they were a bunch of fools who didn't understand a thing?” »

He achieves this by talking about a situation that Ranpo has faced before but does not accept because it goes against what his mother taught him.

But what allowed Fukuzawa to gain the ability to change Ranpo's point of view, what convinced Ranpo to listen to him and stop believing what his parents had taught him.

It's simply: his sincerity.

Whether in the anime or the book, it's Fukuzawa's sincerity that earns him some initial trust from Ranpo.

“Fukuzawa was not an eloquent speaker. He wasn't someone who could manipulate others with his words. There was only one card left up his sleeve that he could play. Sincerity. »

“Ranpo carefully observed his expressions. »

And Ranpo was able through his observation skills to understand this sincerity and to believe in it. It was this sincerity that marked the beginning of the deep relationship that would unite them.

It's almost ironic that Ranpo and Fukuzawa's relationship starts out on both a lie and a truth at their rawest.

“If you refuse to acknowledge your gift, you are no different from the bloodthirsty man I used to be. You must recognize your talents, especially now that your parents are gone.” »

“All he wanted was to be able to tell a little white lie so that this kid could see the simple truth. »

Thanks to this, Ranpo is ready for the first time to believe in something else, he wants to understand and is ready to accept Fukuzawa's explanation because he no longer sees him as someone who could manipulate him but as someone sincere.

“But—then tell me. What am I? What were my parents telling me? Make me understand why I'm here—why I'm like this. If you can do that, then I'll believe you.” »

That doesn't mean he has to deny everything his parents did for him and hate them, no, he just has to find a new interpretation for their behaviors.

Fukuzawa does not seek to antagonize Ranpo's parents and what Ranpo learned from them because they are not the enemies in the story. Ranpo just doesn't have to choose between their version and Fukuzawa's because Fukuzawa manages to make them cohabit between them and I think that helped Ranpo to accept that it's just because of a new factor (his skill) , awaken after the death of his parents that he began to no longer understand the world. It wasn't his fault, he was just unable to control his gift.

And so here come Fukuzawa's lie.

The situation is almost the same in the anime, except for the following:

In the anime, it looks like Fukuzawa thought about and came up with the idea of the ability use naturally, it felt so natural that I even thought it was weird when he tried to backtrack at the end of the episode.

But in the book Fukuzawa gives this answer in a rush because Ranpo gives him the chance to help him get better and that's what Fukuzawa wants to do.

“Ranpo was no longer sulking. Instead, he was honestly looking for an answer—something he'd never done before. And Fukuzawa was the only one who could give it to him. »

"Fukuzawa didn't have much time. If he let this chance go by, Ranpo would probably never seek answers again. »

“Anything would do. He just needed to say something. He had already used the ace up his sleeve: sincerity. He wasn't good at persuading others or speaking eloquently, either. He was even worse at lying. »

“As if by reflex, Fukuzawa said: “Because you’re a skill user.” »

Fukuzawa sincerely wanted to help Ranpo, but he was in a rush and was unable to come up with a more stable plan. It was his environment that influenced his choice. It may seem rash but what mattered for now was that Ranpo could accept that he was not the one missing something but that the situation was reversed: the rest of the world was missing something.

“{…} and the only way to breakthrough was to shine light on something completely new. Something different. »

This status of skill user had become the new beacon in Ranpo's life, it was thanks to this that he could navigate in the middle of this sea filled with lack of logic.

That's why Ranpo clings so much to his status as a skill user at the start of the manga, because it's the only truth that was able to save him and given to him by the one person he has been able to believe.

This was new data that Ranpo didn't know about until the theater incident, so he never got to consider this possibility on his own, which makes the situation perfect for Fukuzawa.

"Yours (skill) is the reason why you're in pain and why everyone seems like a monster." “…???” Ranpo was at a loss. He blinked in silent confusion. »

And even then, Ranpo still doubts, because he doesn't understand why he would be special, because his parents always made him realize that he wasn't but Fukuzawa manages to justify that.

“Your skill awakened when your parents died. »

In the anime Fukuzawa remains calm but Ranpo accepts this "explication" much more quickly whereas in the book, even if Fukuzawa keeps a straight face, he moves forward guided by his impulses and his only goal: to help Ranpo get out of his cocoon.

He must insist, explain, and convince Ranpo of what he is saying.

“Fukuzawa gave thanks to his daily training. He had no idea what he was saying, but his heart was racing, and cold sweat dripped from his palms. Nevertheless, his expression was completely still. »

“Any hesitation in a fight with real swords could lead to death. The enemy must never get the chance to observe your eyes and predict your next move. That was why Fukuzawa was naturally able to keep a straight face, was feeling anguished or terrified. »

And it is with this calm and perseverance that Fukuzawa manages to convince Ranpo of his new status.

But the book shows us the complexity of how Fukuzawa became someone so important to Ranpo and where this blind loyalty comes from.

Then comes the moment when Fukuzawa finds an object to allow Ranpo to focus: the famous glasses.

This symbol of the sincerity and trust that unites their relationship is also the symbol of its basis / of how it all began.

It's a rebirth for Ranpo

« “{…}repeated Fukuzawa as if he were imprinting that thought on a newly born chick’s mind. »

But what matters is that Fukuzawa managed to help Ranpo and that he understands what is really happenning and who he really is.

« "Isn't it all clear now? The world isn't a frightening place. Everyone else isn't a monster. They're just stupider than you." Ranpo caught his breath. He traced his finger around the glasses' frames as he weighted. “But… No, could it be…? »

#bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs the untold origins of the detective agency #ranpo edogawa #fukuzawa #bungou stray dogs fukuzawa #bungou stray dogs the untold story of the detective agency #bungo stray dogs the untold origins of the detective agency spoilers #ranpo's parents #analysis #book vs anime #bungou stray dogs season 4 #bungou stray dogs season 4 spoilers #just me rambling #English is not my native language #so I apologize in advance if my speech go in circle or sometimes seems disjointed #and of course it remains an analysis and the discussion on everything I put forward remains open #bsd #bsd spoilers #bsd analysis

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ikemenomegas · 2 years ago

Text

Omega!Fukuzawa x Alpha!Reader

Maybe Every After

For the record Fukuzawa is a zaddy and I don't think anyone is going to argue with me on that. But he wasn't always a zaddy! You have to grow up a lot to earn the title and Fukuzawa had a lot of growing up to do even in his thirties.

Meet cute?-

Fukuzawa met the person who would become his Alpha at some stuffy local function he attended because of his status as one of the five greatest swordsmen.

While they hit it off well, commiserating over the oppressive self-congratulatory nature of these kinds of events, it was not love at first sight. Fukuzawa was able to carry on pleasant, engaging conversation with them

Fukuzawa was by turns a little awkward, eccentric, curious, and the sense of duty, justice and good judgment that characterizes his throughout his life permeated the conversation, leaving a lasting impression on you

Fukuzawa's work and his superiors are all top secret, but despite that, he does not try to make himself come off as an enigma and his intentions and ideology are largely transparent, which in the time of the Great War, the first ability war, and with Fukuzawa's position being what it was, was surprising and refreshing

You meet with him a few times as new friends in between whatever it is he does when he's not with you

Some time after those meetings begin would be around the time that he is ordered to begin assassinating war-hawk ministers

You see him change as those assassinations pile up and see him apparently lose the feeling of rightness that was in him when you first met at that party

He disappears soon after resigning his position in this mission, cutting himself off from the world that had descended into the misery and chaos of war, from the deaths he had caused, and from you, the person who had become important when he was still young and full of naive idealism

Meet again-

It's by chance you meet again when he is spending his work hours as a bodyguard.

Or maybe it's not chance. It's a certain circle of people that can afford the services of someone as skilled as Fukuzawa, as much as he tries to keep apart from those kinds of people. His reputation took a hit after he left his government position, although you don't know the circumstances around his departure, but people say it's because he isn't a patriot. The word makes you disappointed. The are parts of every war that are not about patriotism, where blood is no longer spilled for the love of one's country but because there are those who have lost their way.

Reconnecting is hard but maybe because you understand the rumors this way, it is not as hard as it might have been. Fukuzawa Yukichi is loyal, that you have known almost since you met him. He is loyal to the people who walk down the street and do not know him, he is loyal to all the people of the nation who make their way slowly through life alongside him, he is loyal to some ideal of justice that you don't necessarily understand but that you believe in too. You see sometimes the pain that the rumors cause him, but you believe in him, whatever that might mean, and so he lets the pain wash over him and away in the truth of his intact honor

It comes up at some point that you are still not a mated Alpha. There is no one else waiting for you as your tea times meeting with Fukuzawa continue. It just hadn't felt right, somehow, to try and make that kind of connection in the years that have passed. The great war turned everything upside down, including something inside of your good and most principled friend.

One day, he'll tell you about it, about what turned his heart inside out, but that is many years in the future

For now, you're the one who asks him if he wants to meet and restart first

He seems tired and you're surprised that he accepts, but he does. Once. And then twice. And then a third time. And it's almost like it used to be, even though you're both older and a bit more jaded, maybe with a few more hard edges. The meetings extend longer, and become more frequent. It is no longer tea on his days off or when he has time between jobs. There are late night meals after his employer dismisses him and lunches on the occasions he is released early. On one memorable occasion, you find yourself taking an early morning walk through a dew studded garden watching the sun rise pink and cold after a night on which you could not sleep

One thing led to another-

Eventually, Fukuzawa asks you to be his heat partner. It's a bit of a surprise and something that makes you nervous since Fukuzawa effectively ignored you for years.

You had once slept together in what was essentially a platonic way, or perhaps some kind of experiment. It was fine, oddly peaceful, especially at the end when you just passed a bottle of water back and forth, but you'd sort of wordlessly agreed to not do it again

He tells you he's sure though. His heats aren't frequent because he's on suppressants, but they do happen, and this is one of the different things. Fukuzawa seems to want, to have a restlessness that is more apparent to you, lingering beneath the surface

You already suspect it's the loss of purpose, the loss of public reputation somehow which had carried with it its own sense of purpose. He's a famous swordsman, one of the best in the country. Even a tame wolf desires to hunt.

So you spend his breakthrough heats together.

And you remember why the two of you never had sex after the first time. It makes you wonder if you remember the "silent agreement" wrong, or if he remembers it differently, and reminds you why you didn't dwell on it.

It's not earth shattering, the sex that is. It's just heat sex, just making sure he gets off so that he can sleep through the intervals between his body temperature spiking. Except you're in his home, the gauzy curtains drawn, scent patches off, and it's disturbing how clear the memory of the last time overlaps with this one, even after so many years.

It's like being in the middle of a monsoon storm, pressure and torn leaves, and summer heat and all. And while you thrust into his wanting body, he watches you. The heat-haze is obvious and his eyes are half-lidded in the associated exhaustion, but he tracks you when you lean back to swipe the back of your hand over your forehead and there's something hungry in his gaze when he looks down to where you're connected

You remember the first time and how intrigued you'd been by this particular mannerism of his, how he keeps his eyes open. He had been watchful and curious even as you'd laughed with him over your shared fumblings. His gaze had been heavy and consuming when he'd shown his aikido skills, at your request, and tumbled you from over him to pin you to the floor.

This time there's a lot more kissing because if you're close to his face, you don't have to see his eyes, but the way Fukuzawa opens his mouth for you with trust like you've been doing this for years makes the strategy nearly futile.

You have to work right after that first heat tapers off so he's still in his nest when you're putting on your shoes, weekend duffel in your hands.

It's late afternoon going on evening so the apartment is dark. His hair is splayed out on a pillow. You're satisfied though that he has pre-made meals in the fridge and you've changed out most of his nest bedding so he can rest in a clean spot after you've gone. Fukuzawa's not saying anything, watching while you rub a sore spot on your neck, which makes him smirk. You're convinced this will be another scenario just like last time where you don't talk about it, when he speaks up, stopping your hand on the doorknob. "Same in three months?" he asked instead. Despite the stab of apprehension, you smiled. "Same in three months," and left to catch a flight.

You don't let it get quite that long before you contact him again. You don't see him, but you text him and he texts back, which is at least a relief that he's not going to vanish again into whatever new twilight he inhabits.

It's the same in three months, apart from the weather outside. His eyes, blue like steel and watching you while you bring him over the edge, the sense of being in the eye of a summer storm, that feeling of trusting familiarity when you lick into his mouth and catch the sound he makes when you crook your fingers inside him. It's the same how it's only his response that changes when you kiss him later and are more gentle about it, running your teeth against his jaw before going to cradling his head and kissing the corner of his mouth.

There's laundry in the machine and porridge on the stove. Fukuzawa's heat had settled sometime in the very early hours of the morning and the two of you were more or less clothed for the first time in days. Fukuzawa was however leaning in the door, watching you put shredded seaweed, pickled plums, and katsuo tronçons on small plates already laid out on a tray. You glanced at him from the corner of your eye, watching him almost lazily watch you. But, you paused in using a pair of chopsticks to pluck out a single ginko nut from a narrow jar. There was something almost tense in his posture. He was barely out of the thick of heat and you could see the faint tremble in his wrist before he folded his arms to hide it. You checked the pot with the still yet-to-boil rice and then ducked under his jaw to brush your nose against the scent gland there. The way he shivered, still sensitive, was almost enough to make you feel bad. "You should go lie down," you murmured, smiling in apology, "I'll bring the tray over." He hesitated, but then nodded. Something pulled at you behind your navel, similar to that familiar sensation when you had worked him through the heat. Only this time, out of the haze, you followed it and followed Fukuzawa to his nest. Its fresh linens were soft and sweet smelling as you guided him into it. He sighed when he was lying down again, a long exhale that gave nothing away. He was just watching. You tucked a blanket over his hips and let your hand linger a touch too long, feeling like you were falling into his eyes. He made no sound when you pulled away and did not return until the meal was ready. Although you did stand in the doorway he had just vacated, leaning so you could see Fukuzawa, loosely tied deep blue and light grey layers of his yukata falling half open as he rolled over to keep you within line of sight. He ate every bite of food, still maintaining that tense, anticipatory silence. You didn't remember this from the first time. His gaze only flickered from the tray and your hands to your eyes when you accidentally let out an encouraging rumble as he ate and immediately felt heat flash up your neck, mortified. The corner of his mouth twitched as he brought his chopsticks to his lips and nibbled at a bit of fish. You've read romance books, once or twice, seen the pervasive tropes pop up in just about every drama, imported or otherwise. People talk about finding someone that you feel you've known your whole life as something magical. No one talks about how unsettling it can be, how it could get all consuming all too quickly. It's disturbing in some way, the way you can sense the ease with which that could push into entitlement, envy, or just an endless fall. That is why after the first time you and Fukuzawa Yukichi had slept together, passing a bottle of water back and forth after and watching the rim indent into one another's lips when you took a mouthful, throats flexing to swallow, you had never spoken of the event again. You had never invited it happening again, and up until now neither had he. There's something at the bottom of that drop. There's always a hard landing. Somewhere. It felt too easy, being with him. You had fallen in as friends harder than this, feeling out the edges of one anothers' code and ethics, where you could push boundaries into asking about personal and professional interests. Although you never touch them, you knew where one anothers' cracks were.

Just as you never asked him directly about the things he had done in the war, about his suddenly cold reception among the circle you'd met in, he never asked you how you really felt about those people. He never asked if your heart too had broken somewhere during the Great Ability War. The stifling feeling of knowing both too much and too little about someone who trusted you far too much for what you knew suddenly stole all the moisture from your throat. A sip of tea helped, but Fukuzawa's posture had gone back to that waiting. Master swordsman: master at reading any opponent. You told yourself heavily that you were perfectly willing to continue being his heat partner, at least until the way you two distinctly did not push boundaries bored him. He had a competitive spirit to a point. There were goalposts that only he could see, standards to which others were not often held. Stagnancy had never quite suited him. Stillness did. Was that what was at the bottom? Was it the stagnant life of saying nothing and doing nothing and keeping a status quo? Or was it blissful stillness, knowing nothing would catch you and nothing needed to?

It takes almost a year for either of you to bring it up and it's only at the cusp of realizing this is becoming an unhealthy new normal that it happens. It is still incredibly difficult to broach the fact that the physical intimacy makes you feel like strangers but every conversation in between makes you feel like you could get to know him forever.

It's around this time you finally start to really talk. You know how you can know someone for ages, and even be really close to them, but there are long stretches of time where you don't talk about anything important because you're afraid of making the other person do emotional labor for you, and you don't know if they'll mind? That's the first year Fukuzawa and his Alpha have after he comes back.

He acknowledges that you've done things rather in reverse order, as far as the typical trajectory of reconnecting with friends goes. You start to date, more or less, making time to see one another every week or every other week as your schedules allow.

It's a bit strange, to suddenly realize the ways in which you both have changed. Fukuzawa is as principled as ever, but he's unmoored now, without the ties he severed to the military police and the mission it brought. You are somewhat more stable, older and more settled into your own career, but heavier in your soul, sadder. Yokohama is reviving, black towers and tidy apartment buildings rising on the horizon, but it took too much to get here, too much blood before the nation sickened of it.

Fukuzawa won't let you court him.

You're in one of the old cafes that survived all the conscriptions. The owner's son moves around with a tray and a flour dusted apron and the atmosphere is oddly cheerful, despite the recently terrible weather. The last of the summer storms are making a good showing this year and it's limited the places you and Fukuzawa can go. Museums, restaurants, the occasional wander around a particularly well constructed public part of an office building - usually places near your work or his.

You'd tried other things, shopping for food or clothes and paying maybe too much attention to his preferences. You'd tried things like flower viewing or afternoons trying wagashi in specialty shops. While Fukuzawa had seemed to enjoy them and settled easily into the traditional etiquette sometimes called for in these places, he never acknowledged that these might be early attempts at courting.

When you spent time in his apartment he let you scent items in his nest while lounging around or before his heats. If he was at the little rooftop house you were living in, he would sometimes choose one pillow or blanket to curl around and carefully leave it on your spot on the couch when he left.

You looked at him over the rim of your mug and one of his brows went up. When you said nothing, he looked away, tracking the movements of people on the street.

You still partner him when his heat hits, but the sex is worse, as far as that unsettlingly settled intimacy goes. It's wonderful, he's wonderful. Sex itself is not that interesting as a rule, and you're both too aware of the delicacy of the situation to attempt anything like adding toys during his heat or a simple scene to the build up or cool down. But every time after, you want to stay longer.

Fukuzawa shifts his nest, ever so slightly because he is picky about it, but enough so that he can always see you as you move about his home when you need to get food or nesting materials for him, so that you don't have to anxiously flit between the stove and the door in order to sate the need to know that he is safe and comfortable in the aftermath.

You think it's going to end, that the pained distance Fukuzawa now puts between himself and the world is going to pull taught against the growing need to be around one another, to care beyond the dedication of a close intimate friendship.

Everyone can see it-

And then he accidentally adopts a super genius.

This is one of the funnier things that's ever happened to your friend since you've known him and you make sure he knows you think so once or twice.

Once Ranpo is secure in his place as Fukuzawa's ward a few years later, you come up with a way to let Ranpo know he's the best thing to ever happen to your mate and also that you will never ever get tired of imagining the look of shock you know took over Fukuzawa's face when all four and a half feet of teenage whoop-ass came banging through the door of that office.

But that's years from now.

Ranpo peers up at you when you meet Fukuzawa for lunch and a film a week after he's started tagging along with your friend

The boy isn't very tall, but he's got a maturity to his features that you chalk up to either the orphan thing or the child genius thing. He had taken one look at you, seated at the back of the restaurant away from the windows, and it felt like someone crowding into your space even while he touched neither you nor Fukuzawa. You are perhaps overly sensitive of other people's attention. It's another thing that makes being with Fukuzawa comfortable somehow. He's observant, but not oppressive with what he does with that information. Only the second time you'd met he'd helped extricate you from an incredibly uncomfortable conversation with a junior minister in the local commerce department. Now the kid looks at you and at Fukuzawa and pouts impressively. "You're single." He says it like an accusation and an assignment and you could almost laugh at Fukuzawa's wide eyed expression if it weren't for everyone three tables deep around you staring. You raise an eyebrow at him. "He's allowed to be single," you chide, reminding yourself that you are talking to a child still. It's a bit funny, you admit, smiling when the boy glares at you. The waitress comes over when you beckon, bringing tea for Fukuzawa and a sweet layered sort of beverage for the kid. Fukuzawa had told you about the boy's obvious sweet tooth and even though he huffs at you, he takes the tall glass eagerly, poking a straw through the layers. "Does it bother you?" You can't help it. Fukuzawa had said the child was a genius, observant to the point of misunderstanding, his incredible intelligence looping in on itself and making the rest of the world occasionally incomprehensible. It seems unlikely for a child to hold the kind of incredibly conservative prejudice that says omegas should be mated, but he seems put out. Ranpo sulks behind a menu before saying, "I'm never wrong." The meal is quiet, and gradually people stop looking at your table. Fukuzawa excuses himself on the walk to the theater to purchase something from a convenience store. It's there you lean up against the mouth of an alley and look down at the kid. He's really short, you worry someone isn't feeding him enough and the realize that Fukuzawa is going to be that someone. "We're not together," you said. Ranpo looks up at you, clearly still sulking. "You don't have to lie to me," he says, but he sounds a little uncertain. "We're not together in the way you would understand it," you say, "or the way most people understand." Ranpo sees your emotions in your eyes, and suddenly wishes he didn't understand. Your gaze is filled with longing, but he doesn't know how you can't see it's for something you already have. Almost. "He's ashamed of something," Ranpo says quietly. You hunched over a little. "I know. Adults are often ashamed of a lot of things though." He looks at you and wonders what you're ashamed of. "You should probably ask him about this one. He's not very good at saying what he means, but most adults aren't." You're laughing when Fukuzawa reappears.

To everyone's surprise, he actually sits through the movie, happily demolishing the little fortune you'd bought him in caramel popcorn and boxed candies, even if he complains about figuring out the plot five minutes in when you leave

Ranpo doesn't parent trap you two exactly, he doesn't have quite that level of interest in involving himself, but Fukuzawa is good to him, and he sees you often and you are good to him too. Neither of you always understand what he understands, but you show him kindness without ulterior motive, you try and show him how to safely exist around other people.

Fukuzawa is asked to be a bodyguard for Mori Ougai and something about engaging with that man, even though he can't tell you about the job itself, makes him tell you, in a desperate whisper under the moonlight, that it was him who assassinated the war hawk ministers during the peace debates. It's him who is bloodying his blade for something he hopes will be better, even if it turns his stomach, even if it means he doesn't know who he is anymore.

"I know who you are." Fukuzawa tenses in your arms, and you think frantically that you have certainly made a mistake. But you don't take it back. You don't want to. You do know who he is, your friend. You know how lonely what he's done has made him. Only you didn't know what he had done. Now that you know, it doesn't seem to matter. It's distant, the way all bloody things are distant when you don't see them. You've never had all that fond a feeling towards the wealthy people that profit from the abject misery of others. All the hunger and desperation in the world are distant, abstract concepts to them. Why should their deaths not mean the same to you? Of course, you can't say this to your friend, your sometimes lover, lying in your arms. The moonlight drops over his cheeks, turning them pale. His eyes are closed for once, his face turned into your neck, as though he is afraid of what he will see in your eyes. You understand it was not simply one or two storybook villains. There is no human in the world who has done only bad their entire life. Fukuzawa was not prone to exaggeration, even if drama appealed to him. It seems likely he meant it literally when he speaks of wading through blood to put an end to those who whipped up the populace into a frenzy, who wanted for the death never to end. "I know." You stroke your thumb near the corner of his eye, brushing your cheek to his brow, pressing a chaste kiss to the curve of his cheek. "Honor doesn't always mean doing the honorable thing," you say softly. "It means making difficult choices. You regret having to make it, but do you regret the outcome?" He is quiet for a long time. You know he hasn't fallen back asleep, despite the languid warmth between your bodies. He's quiet for long enough that your heart rate returns to normal and you rub your knuckles up and down his back. An occasional burst of deep, faint purring lets you know this is at least appreciated, if not necessarily something he thinks he deserves. You've taken to sleeping together at this point. The mounting danger as different organizations wage new war across the city drives you both to it. Besides, it is simply easier to manage an antsy teenager if you're in the same place, wherever that might be, rather than passing him back and forth like the result of some amicable divorce as you both work to keep him safe and out of the hands of those who would use his intelligence. "No," he says, as you knew he would. "There is nothing to be attained in the way of peace by letting war simply continue until each side is beaten into exhaustion. Withdrawing with our strength intact is the only thing that would save the nation and its people." He says it like he's said it to himself many times. He goes nearly limp in your embrace, pliant as he nudges against you until your forehead is pressed to his. You wonder though- "Is this the first time you've said it out loud?" "What I did is a secret few are aware of." "But the investigations..." "They won't find me," he said, but you felt a shiver go through him, felt gooseflesh rise on his arms. If they did, it could open the possibility for those people to be made martyrs. It was natural for him to be afraid. "They won't," you said lightly. You didn't know what you could do to make that true, but some things needed to be said aloud. "If they catch me, I'll face whatever is decided," he said quietly. "But I won't get caught." "You saved a lot of lives." He sighed. "I know." You rubbed slow circles over the middle of his back. "The sword isn't meant to be used like that. They had lives, families, I-" he swallowed "-I ended that. I enjoyed it. And I have to live with that." His eyelashes too were silvered in the moonlight. "You have to live with it," you agreed, even as he flinched, "but you don't have to punish yourself for it every time you live." You pretend not to feel the wetness on your clothing as Fukuzawa shudders into your collar.

Forever love-

You're truly together and officially courting by the time the Agency is three years old, which is the first more calm year since the Agency opened. Turns out opening a business is a huge pain in the behind and that an ability user Agency with less than half a dozen workers, two of whom are genius teenagers who have totally reasonable problems with authority, is an even bigger pain.

By the time the Agency is four years old, you're mated to Fukuzawa, your mark on his shoulder and his on yours. Ranpo grouches something terrible that the two of you could only get your shit together before he turned eighteen, but he's not a legal adult yet, so you get to officially be one of his guardians for at least a few years. Yosano thinks Ranpo is being ridiculous, but she gives you the biggest bouquet of flowers for your and Fukuzawa's home and insists on choosing the restaurant where you all celebrate.

It's been a very long road. You've known Fukuzawa Yukichi for almost thirteen years, an unexpected friend you made in your adult years now your mate. Now someone who you feel, finally, you've started to earn the feeling you've know them all your life, even though you're still learning about him.

He takes you to his home near Osaka, to his family home on Kyushu. He meets your parents, who consider him a bit quiet, but very dutiful. You meet Natsume-sensei, once, and receive his very feline brand of approval and a quiet gift after your official mating. Fukuzawa takes you back to places he particularly enjoyed during those failed months of courting him. You spend season after season getting to know him, pushing boundaries, debating over philosophies, arguing over interior decorating, agreeing over meals.

Your mate, your partner, a soulmate if you have ever believed such a thing, let alone that it would come to you. You're watching white strands of hair like starlight shoot through his natural grey. The wrinkles around his eyes are deepening. It takes him longer to get up from bed than it used to. His silences are longer, but so are the times when he just looks at you, looks and looks like he can never get his fill. His voice is still strong, but you can feel that layer of age crackling under it. And you love him.

You love the man he has grown into, the one who can bear the weight of hard choices placed upon his shoulders, the one who can bear happily having people who work alongside him. You love his patience with Ranpo and his encouragement of Akiko. You love how he holds his hand out for you if you fall behind on your walks, or how he comes to you and stands close enough for his scent to wrap around you while you point out some small natural beauty.

Love can be horribly consuming, it can stagnate where it was once immediately comfortable or grow jealous at its own ease, unsure if it is charm or affection that ties you together. It can grow desperate and possessive. There are still things that can be so hard to say, old things that left old wounds that are still hard to talk about, but there's something to be said for age and wisdom.

Things aren't perfect, love should not be perfect, and something in you delights in knowing that with Fukuzawa it will always be incomplete. Things will not grow still, there will never be a moment there is nothing to know about him. You have grown into yourselves, the both of you, and this is the love you will grow old with.

#bsd #fukuzawa yukichi #fukuzawa x reader #a/b/o dynamics #a/b/o #omegaverse #omega!fukuzawa #alpha!reader #io.omegas #cw: mentions of potential break up (they don't but there's major relationship growing pains)#cw: oc's and fukuzawa's anxiety #cw: mentions of great ability war and likely ptsd in fukuzawa but also probably oc and ranpo #cw: adopting a child? does that deserve a cw? no idea but ranpo is fukuzawa and oc's love child in all but actual physical truth.#I think Alpha low key adopts Yosano too #baby Alpha is their very adopted kid. Yosano was practically raised by Mori (shudders)#so Alpha is very much the foster parent #she's way more independent and suspicious of being coddled compared to ranpo who wants to be mentored/parented #happy return of bsd this is literally my favorite show sorry to everyone who already wants me to shut up about it

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