#putting the payne in

[theashesofthefirststar]

Edwin-centric fic idea for those of us who like to see our favorite gay ghost boy suffer

Edwin gets caught up with Destiny The Endless, who attempts to torment him with visions of what his life could have been like if he lived. He explains that one's future is never set in stone, but some outcomes are more likely than others, and for Edwin, all of his most likely paths were nearly as tragic as the one that ended in his death.

In one path he’s conscripted into the military at 18 and dies a month before the war ends in November of 1918. In a similar path he develops a relationship with a fellow platoon member only to be found out and court marshaled for “gross indecency”. He spends 10 years in prison.

There’s even a path where a teacher finds him the night of what was supposed to be his sacrifice and puts a stop to everything before the demon shows up. Later, a tense confrontation with Simion leads to a stolen kiss, which leads to a secret, years long affair that only ends when Edwin is invited to Simion's wedding.

None of this has much of an effect on Edwin. He always knew there was no happy endings for people like him when he was alive. It's why he's never yearned for his life or grieved his death in the way Charles does.

So Destiny changes tactics and fills Edwins's mind with versions of the life Charles could have had if he hadn't died. Unlike Edwin's, these paths are all happy and full. Charles getting away from his father. Charles going off to college. Charles making new, better friends. Charles taking up guitar. Charles kissing pretty girls. Charles getting a good job and moving his mother somewhere safe. Charles falling in love and getting married and having kids and making them spaghetti and singing them songs and doing all the things he's been yearning for since his death, but that Edwin can never give him.

And Destiny taunts Edwin. "How does it feel," he asks, "Knowing that any life would have been better for Charles than the one he shares with you?"

[kwadlayns]

Good detectives do what they need to in order to solve a case. 💀🔎✨

[leahaart]

Pookies

[antichrists-plus1]

[They're in love.]

[tititilani]

I can't stop thinking about if Simon had taken Edwin's offer

Like Charles finds Edwin in the hallway as ever but this time there's another boy there too, cowering against the wall next to him. Maybe the dollhead spider doesn't care about Simon, too busy focusing on its favorite target, so Charles is left standing in the hallway with Simon when Edwin is taken.

They get out of hell, but Edwin doesn't confess due to Simon hovering behind his elbow. He doesn't want to confess his emotions in front of his killer, who he probably hasn't even properly figured out how he's feeling towards yet.

The Night Nurse is pissed they came out with an extra soul but Niko's same loophole still applies and Simon stays.

"This is Simon," Edwin says when it's all said and done, finally introducing the boy that's been hiding behind him since the door closed. "He was a...classmate of mine."

"He saved me," Simon says, looking up at Edwin moony-eyed and Charles knows that look and something settles heavy in his stomach.

"Glad to have ya, mate," he tells him even though the words taste sour. This other boy knew Edwin when he was alive, the thought is slightly terrifying to him.

Simon settles in fine with the agency even if the agency feels a little crowded now with five people in it but he continues to moon over Edwin and Edwin just...never tells anyone how they actually knew each other. He reasons it just doesn't matter, that he can't find the right time, whatever.

Charles never really warms up to him, though he tries to hide it, but he sees the looks Simon gives Edwin, a soppy smitten look that is somehow worse than anything Monty or the Cat King ever tried with Edwin because of all of them, Simon arguably knows the most about like Edwardian courting. That, like Edwin, Simon has also survived hell. Charles hates the idea that someone could potentially understand Edwin more than he does.

He hates it so much that nothing further happens between him and Crystal because the idea of Edwin being left alone with Simon bothers him so much. He sees Simon adjusting Edwin's collar one (1) time and it makes him feel sick.

And then there's the fortune-teller.

They only go to her sometimes for cases because she never fails to freak Charles out but her prophecies tend to be accurate like 60% of the time which is pretty good for a fortune teller. She looks at the two of them at the end, because it is just the two of them for once, and then looks just at Edwin.

"How kind you are," she says, the words a compliment but the tone snide. "To house your killer. Pray tell it doesn't come back to you."

"What." Charles says. "The fuck."

Charles is furious, of course, and it takes Edwin a long time to talk him out of smashing Simon's face in with the new cricket bat.

"He's like me," he insists in that quiet but firm voice. Charles wants to scream that Simon is nothing like Edwin - that he doesn't have a fraction of Edwin's kindness or pissiness, that his blue eyes are not nearly as beautiful as Edwin's green - but before he can even open his mouth, Edwin continues. "He...He likes boys, Charles. He likes me."

Oh. Oh.

Charles stares at Edwin who is looking back at him, trying and failing to hide the fact he's terrified, and Charles doesn't give one shit that Edwin likes boys because he's his best mate forever. He's still pissed that Simon is apparently staying but he has to hug Edwin at that. "I'm still pissed you didn't tell me about him," is all he says, swallowing back the other words he wants to say.

Charles grows even more paranoid about Simon being around, who has to get used to the fact that Charles takes to swinging his cricket bat ominously every time he comes within ten feet of Edwin. He finds out that adjusting clothing was an Edwardian courting thing and wants to break something. The very idea the very person who killed his best mate is now trying to put the moves on said best mate pisses him off.

It also makes him think of numerous times Edwin had readjusted his collar or jacket in the past and it makes his non-existent stomach flip.

Eventually, Simon decides he's ready to move on to his after-life and Charles keeps his hands from fisting when he looks at Edwin with that same soppy look. He knows Edwin has forgiven Simon by now but Charles has always been better at holding a grudge and he knows what is going to come out of Simon's mouth before he even asks. He knows that if Edwin says yes, he won't stop him.

Charles also knows that if Edwin does, there is no way he is going to find any kind of his own afterlife.

"You could come with me," Simon says hopefully and the moment after is the longest in Charles' life.

"Thank you, Simon," Edwin says kindly and Charles has to keep himself from crying. "But I have no interest in going anywhere without Charles."

He steps back - away from Simon and back towards Charles. Ears suspiciously pink, Edwin links their hands and they watch as Simon follows the Night Nurse.

[a-jasminator]

When your best mate is about to go full vengeful and there's only one way to shock him back to his senses...

Companion piece to my fic Spectral Rage!

[fairandfatalasfair]

"Edwin can help" says Charles.

Crystal raises an eyebrow at him. He smiles sunnily.

"Edwin would sell me to Satan for one corn chip," she says.

Edwin, from his spot at the desk, lowers his book enough to give her a longsuffering look. "This feels like one of your obscure internet references," he says. He still says "internet" like the word doesn't belong in his mouth.

Crystal gives him a bland smile. "The internet isn't obscure," she says. "You just don't know anything about it because you're a million years old."

"One hundred twenty four," he says, because he's a pedantic little shit.

Charles is chuckling in the corner, because he has low tastes and thinks Edwin being a pedantic little shit is hilarious.

"At any rate," says Edwin crisply, "As a fugitive from hell, negotiating with Satan would hardly be in my best interests. Also, as a fugitive from hell, I have no interest in seeing anyone sent there unjustly, much less someone I have grown... attached to."

She feels her smile warm a little at that, and turns her head so that Edwin won't see. Love you too, Edwin.

"Finally," he concludes, "I am dead, with no need to eat, and therefor have no use for corn chips. This accusation does not make sense."

Crystal chokes at the affronted dignity in his voice, but pulls her expression back under control, only turning back to Edwin when she's sure she can look disdainful without her lips twitching. Charles dying of laughter in the corner isn't helping, but she manages.

"It's a meme," she says loftily.

Edwin's longsuffering expression turns pained. "Half the time, I am sure you are making these things up to aggravate me," he informs her.

She isn't, but only because the reality aggravates him plenty without any embellishment.

"Is it working?" she asks, and finally lets herself laugh when he picks up his book again and glares daggers at her over the top of it.

[sonseulsoleil]

Ghosts don't sleep. They don't even really get tired. At least, not tired in the way sleep would fix. When Charles first dies, he attempts to sleep, but he never can manage it. No matter how many nights he tries. Eventually he gives up.

But he never gives up asking Edwin to read to him at night. Edwin's voice as he reads is warm and steady. Comforting, even. Charles may be dead at sixteen, but he isn't alone. He thinks his best chance at falling asleep is if Edwin is there to read him a bedtime story.

It's probably silly. But Edwin doesn't seem to mind.

Edwin reads him mostly detective stories at first. Sherlock Holmes, anything by Agatha Christie, Nancy Drew and The Hardy Boys, of course—which is where they get the idea for the agency in the first place. But Edwin loves books of all sorts, so it isn't long before he's branching out into other genres.

Usually it's old books. Books from before Edwin was even alive. Books Charles would've avoid reading in school. Pride and Prejudice. Frankenstein. Jane Eyre. Oliver Twist. Somehow hearing them in Edwin's voice makes them much more tolerable.

And some are fun. Treasure Island is one Charles finds himself requesting over and over again. He always liked pirates. Lord of the Rings is another favorite, although maybe Charles is just excited that Edwin finally found a book that was published after he died.

Niko introduces Edwin to much newer literature. Teen romance novels with bright covers and cutesy, wordplay titles. Edwin even reads some of the books about boys kissing boys. An adorable, pink blush creeps across his cheeks every time still, but he's getting more comfortable.

Ghosts don't sleep, or even get tired. But Charles thinks he almost gets drowsy sometimes, late at night, when their living friends are sleeping, and he is curled safely and comfortably into Edwin, listening to him read.

[that-ineffable-devil]

Charles' jealousy at the Cat King is obvious and overt. But he can feel justified in being upset with him because he's trapped them in Port Townsend and keeps interrupting their cases. And of course nobody else would really stop to think about it, because everyone thinks the Cat King is shady as hell.

His jealousy at Monty is more subtle--enough that the characters don't really notice it, but the audience has their attention drawn to it.

The way his smile fades when he watches the two of them together and thinks no one is looking.

The way his nose scrunches up in anger or frustration when he watches Monty show Edwin his astrology reading and Edwin not even acknowledge him leaving.

The way he tries to draw Edwin's attention away from the book Monty gave him and then, when he fails, directly addresses the time he's been spending with Monty, forcing Edwin's attention.

[edwinisms]

george rexstrew deserves awards for many things but i have to say. edwin’s bloodcurdling scream as niko gets killed deserves a whole award unto itself. like. that scream did not feel at all like a tv show scream. to a somewhat jarring degree. and i can’t express how much I respect that

[mirellapryce]

Post canon, back in London, I can absolutely see Edwin and Charles haunting Crystal's mom into being a better parent a la "A Christmas Carol". Edwin tries diplomacy first and just gives her the heads up that she can choose to do better herself, or else his partner will use his own methods.

Two weeks later when she fails to call her daughter, Charles shows up at whatever museum she's trying to set up in and is just like "I heard most of the stuff in British Museums was stolen anyway. It would be a shame if the last person the cameras saw in the same room as this stuff was you." She tries to call his bluff until he demonstrates that his backpack CAN in fact hold every item in the room, and he's ready to mirror hop to Greece with it if she doesn't ask Crystal out to dinner for impromptu girl's night.

Oh? You're busy tonight? Oh look, the Chinese exhibit. He hasn't been to China yet. He could drop off some stolen goods there too.

[tragedy-machine]

today I come to you with the thought of Edwin deciding to be more tactile and in general more open with his affection towards Charles post confession

more shoulders pats, hugs etc. and it just somehow spirals into his hand finding its way onto Charles' lower back when they're standing close

or grabbing Charles' waist when Edwin wants to pass by him and Charles has loved all the previous developments but simply cannot cope with the new ones because they make him shiver but also hot all over at the same time

they make his head spin, but he can't stop looking forward to them and when sometimes Edwin walks past him and doesn't touch his back, Charles actively misses the contact, but how are you supposed to remind your best mate that he forgot to touch your waist? you can't!

and the final boss for Charles' sanity is Edwin's hand moving from a shoulder touch to a lower back touch, just an absent-minded caress down his spine, while Edwin's focus is on explaining something, and it makes Charles' eyelashes flutter close

brought to you thanks to this gif by @fear0phobia

[montyfinchirl]

when payneland eventually gets together i fully believe they date for one week and then send out the wedding invitations

[stark-lord]

Constantly plagued with thoughts of Edwin now knowing he enjoys being courted and Charles (compulsive charmer) with a whole new arsenal up his sleeve (laser focus on Monty’s whole deal)

“I mean, my smile is prett-y convincing” yeah yeah okay I can see where this is heading. Outlook not so good (for me)

[agerblade]

The thrill of anticipation.

moved from: old account

[tititilani]

If Charles and Edwin ever do kiss in the show, I will be a little disappointed if Edwin DOESN'T make a little noise during it