#putting the noose down as i post
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barbiebiddie · 2 years ago
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OMG?!!??!
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just-some-random-blogger · 2 days ago
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Tormented Spirit | 15
Part 1 [...] 14 15 16
"Is it such a sin to stand up for yourself?" you mutter as tears blur your vision. The way he reacted was visceral, instinctive even. "You never have to stand up for yourself ever again," says Daemon, reaching a hand to you, "come."
Daemon Targaryen x Hightower!Reader | 4k+ | cw: fem!reader, reader has brown hair, wife!reader, twin!Gwayne, arranged/forced marriage, canon divergence, alternate universe, slow burn, DD:DNE, smut (piv, fingering, fingering, double penetration, cock warming) violence, pregnancy, miscarriage, panic/anxiety attacks, suicidal ideation, attempted suicide, daddy issues/child abuse/family problems, mentions/depictions of mental/physical/psychosomatic illness, ye old misogyny, angst, typos, etc.
A/N: guys i think hes trying. | cross posted on ao3
@arabellasleopardcoat @prettybiching @myllovellybones
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You don't know how many times you and Daemon walked around the fountain. Truth be told, as the seconds bled into minutes, you began to fear he would get impatient with you and ask you to stop your walk before you were ready to. It didn't help that every time you looked to examine his demeanor, he was already looking at you. His gaze was scalding. You could not keep it for more than a second.
You could not help but pick at the flower in your hand until all its petals were scattered on the floor. You felt uneasy around him.
At some point, you became too restless walking around with him that you opted to sit down and be done with it. "Very well," you mutter, sitting on the wide ledge of the stone fountain, "I shall tell you."
Daemon sits next to you, brows furrowing at the way your breath hitches.
You suck in a deep breath, "our children are-"
"You need not speak of them this instant," he takes your hand, squeezing it, "not if it is unbearable."
You look at his hand. You look at him. You see the softness of his gaze. You feel nothing. You mutter his name.
He mutters your back in response, reaching for your cheek.
You pull away, both your head and your hand.
He gulps, watching you scoot back. He retreats and digs his nails into his lap.
"If I do not tell you now," you shake your head, looking over your shoulder, "I do not know when next I will be willing."
Daemon watches you watch the water trickle. He shifts, "I do not mind."
"I do," you whip your head back, "I do not want to keep you waiting."
He watches your dark hair flow with the wind. He so badly wants to brush it out of your face. He shakes his head, "you have waited enough for me."
You chuckle dryly, "you misunderstand," you look away and reach for the flower drifting over. You grunt as you stretch your arm out, "you make me uneasy."
Daemon's face twitches. Poison spreads through his thorax and an invisible noose tightens around his neck. He opens his mouth, but only a shudder leaves him. You say this so casually too... what horror.
You manage to reach the flower and relax back in your spot after grabbing it. You stare at the rose before turning to your husband. He looked so unlike what he did the day he left you. His hair, which was once nearly the length of yours, now couldn't cover his ears. And his eyes... they were uncharacteristically soft. You lower your gaze, "there was once a time I put a flower in your hair... do you recall it?"
He knits his brows.
You brush your rose petals.
He does not recall. "I recall the day you littered your brother and your ward with blossoms you picked from the field."
You chuckle as you fidget with your rose, "pity."
Daemon swallows a thick lump in his throat, "would you help me recall it?"
"Twas the same day," you smile, looking up at him.
He is winded, "I-"
"I pity you, I really do."
Deep lines form on his face. He shakes his head as his voice breaks, "I... do not mean to forget."
You chuckle again, though there was no trace of amusement in your chest, only tightness, "I know you don't," you tentatively raise the flower and take a deep breath. It takes a few moments for you to gather the nerve to secure the rose by his ear.
Daemon stills as you do so, then helps you put the flower in place.
You pull away, looking at him and his rose. You noticed the way his breathing grew heavy, how his eyes glistened with tears that threatened to fall. You sigh and shrug, "I remember placing a bud in your hair and thinking you-" you stop to chuckle. Youu shrug and shake your head, "-were devastatingly handsome I could not help but stare."
His lips part and his nostrils twitch.
You wait for him to react.
He does not.
"Do you not recall this either?" you raise your brows, "those were your own words."
He knits his brows, sheepish over how you were seemingly teasing him so suddenly for his vanity.
"You came from the City Watch," you clarified, "I did not know it yet, but you had razed King's Landing and executed criminals in the streets—"
His jaw slacks, "ah."
"—you were covered in blood. I stared because I was concerned and that," you point to nowhere, "was what you told me."
He shakes his head, "a poor jest of a man who thinks himself funny," he turns to the bushes, "forget the memory."
You knit your brows, "I do not want to forget."
He looks back at you.
"I did agree," you mutter, "though instead of devastatingly handsome, I would have called you beautiful."
Daemon wanted to speak, but then the flower in his hair was being blown off by the wind. He keeps it in its place, forfeiting the moment to respond.
"It must be terrible to have only the capacity to recall things that cause you rage or suffering."
A wind blows between you and the air in his lung is pulled along with it. Daemon shivers when you reach a hand out to him. He looks at your outstretched palm before taking it in both of his. His heat causes your skin to prick with goosebumps. His hand felt as hot as dragon fire.
"I recall your scent and the feel of your skin," Daemon scoots forward, "I recall your tenderness and your fire. I-"
"You must understand," you cut him off, placing your other hand atop his, "I do not ask you to recall merely to reminisce," you take a few deep breaths, "I do this to explain I no longer feel that way."
His stomach drops. He realizes then this stoic countenance you held was not that but indifference to him. He whimpers and lowers his head, "no, please-"
"I feel nothing for your sadness," you mutter, "I cannot lend you any more of my pity, for where I once saw beauty, I now see only grief..."
Tears stain his cheeks.
"And loss," you pull away to wipe his face, "my babes looked so much like you."
He presses his hands atop yours and pushes them into his cheeks so that you would not let him go.
"Our babes," you correct yourself.
He whimpers. He screws his eyes shut, trying to recall their names. He cannot.
"I did not write about them for I knew you took many lengths to avoid having children with me."
His eyes are suddenly wide open. He is blindsided.
"I, myself, could not believe it when the maester told me I was with child. He explained to me that it is possible to conceive with premature ejaculation."
Daemon's hold on your hands loosen. You knew what he was doing all alone? You pull away.
"I was deeply afraid you would doubt me, doubt their parentage because you never spilled inside of me, but... you should know that my tw— our twins both had silver hair," you sniffle, "and violet eyes."
You begin to weep as the punishing memory plays in your head. He feels helpless to see you this like this, twice over because he knows if he touches you, you will retreat.
You whimper and shake your head, "many bore witness to my... miscarriage."
The thought horrifies him.
"Your brother being one."
Daemon's face is aghast.
"You can go to him if you ever wish to accuse me of infidelity."
"You think the worst of me," he groans.
You stare at him for a moment then burst into dry laughter, "I do not. You attacked my guards for something you misheard me mutter in my sleep— I think exactly what I know of you."
He makes a sound, "but I-"
You wait for him to continue.
There is nothing left for him to say.
"You must," you sigh, "understand... I am only trying to make you understand. Where you yearn presently I yearned for three years."
"But I don't understand," he shakes his head, "had I not returned today, would you have still written to me?"
You inhale deeply, "I would."
"Then why don't you want me?"
"Because, Daemon!" you come to a stand, "had you not returned today, you still would have ignored me!"
He looks up at you.
"And my children would remain unburied!"
His jaw drops, "w-what?"
"I did not have them buried!" you point to the side, "I had them kept rotting in a box so that they would be acknowledged once by their father and be sent off in the traditions of their house."
Daemon slowly rises to his feet. He gulps, raising a hand.
You step back, "do you understand?"
He clenches his fists, then relaxes. He nods, "what do you want me to do?"
"I want you to prepare the funeral rites for my children and I want their bodies honored tomorrow."
He stares at you for a moment before nodding again. He mutters under his breath, "eminna ziry gaomagon, ñuha jorrāelagon." I will have it done, my love.
"Ȳdra daor yne brōzā bona." Don't call me that.
He is taken off-guard, forgetting that you now speak his mother tongue.
You wipe your face and smoothen out your robe, "I nightly have supper with my sister and nephew."
He watches you shake your head. Something happens to his heart as he imagines how you've lived without him.
"You are more than welcome to join us, so long as you promise to keep your manners."
He perks.
"But you ought to know I normally invite whichever ward is keeping me guard to dine with us."
His eye twitches. He aimlessly examines the sky, "I..."
You watch his expression closely.
"I do not think I can stomach being around your wards, let alone dine with one."
"But I've explained that-"
He raises a hand. You clench your teeth, watching him shake his head. He releases a deep breath, "it is not my desire that you resent me more than you already do."
You watch him reach a hand out to you.
"Let me walk you at least?"
You stare at his hand for a moment. When you take it, you feel your stomach drop and Daemon feels his spirit lifted.
The walk you take is silent. When you arrive to the solar you dined at, Daemon rubs your hand before pulling away. You watch him fade down the hall and you feel conflicted to see him go.
He walks off to gods know where and aimlessly continues to do so until he hears someone call his name. When he turns, he sees his brother's face.
Viserys had been smiling, up until he got close enough to see Daemon's face. The king's brows furrow. He places a hand on his brother's arm, watching tears stream from his face, "skoros iksis pirta?" What is wrong?"
"I could not ask her... but she said you saw them," he mutters, gripping Viserys by the arms. His lips wobble and his brows tighten, "vestas ao ūndan ñuha riñar." She said you saw my children.
Viserys tenses when Daemon's grip tightens, out of aggression or desperation, he was not sure. To his brother, sometimes the two were one in the same. He places his hands on Daemon's shoulders and tries to calm him down.
Daemon shudders, "what did they look like?"
It hits him. He thinks of the moon you left for Oldtown after Daemon left for the Stepstones and how Alicent worried that it would cause conflict between in your marriage. A sourness spreads in the king's mouth as he recalls Alicent worriedly relaying her sister's worries to him— that Daemon would accuse her of fleeing to Oldtown because she had strayed. Viserys clenches his jaw, "they're your children, brother."
Daemon's brows furrow, "w-what?"
"They're Valyrian— silver hair, violet eyes-"
The prince shakes him, "you misunderstand me." He shakes his head, a whimper leaving his lips, "what did they look like?"
Viserys watches Daemon's eyes water all over again.
"Did they look like me? Did they look like her? Did they have her nose? Her lips? Her brows? Or mine?" He shudders, "were they beautiful?"
Viserys feels his lungs tighten when his brother sobs into his chest. His own eyes water and he throws his arms around Daemon. He leans into him as his brother's arms tighten around him. Viserys does not recall the last time Daemon's wept in his arms.
"Shijetra nyke. Nyke shifang aōha ōdres sir," Daemon says through tears. It forces tears to fall from Viserys's eyes. Forgive me. I understand your pain now.
Viserys holds him a little tighter, "ñuha valonqar." My (younger) brother.
The two remain this way until Daemon was calm enough to part from the embrace.
After supper, you make your way back to your chambers, frowning to see it empty. You take a candle and light it, heading out of your room to look for your husband. In truth, you did not know why you were doing so, for all you knew, he was out in Fleabottom, reliving the early days of your marriage. Still... here you were.
You pad quietly down the halls and ask the occasional servant you pass if they had seen Daemon. The response was the same between them all: no, princess. You nod and bid them good night each time before walking off.
You realize soon your feet were silently leading you somewhere, which is why you stop when you reach the hall to the Kingsguards' quarters. You find your eyes falling to the door that lead to the shared room of the Cargyll brothers. You momentarily recall the rather cold dismissal you gave them, which was so unlike you. Your heart calls for you to check on them. The next thing you know, you're knocking on their door.
You watch the light on your candle flicker as you wait for an answer. You watch it go off when the door opens with a, "princess."
You look up, finding Arryk's worried face, and soon, Erryk behind him.
"Has something happened?" Erryk asks hurriedly.
You shake your head, "no... I," you look at the smoke wafting from your candle, "I just wanted to see if you were alright."
Arryk, even through the darkness, could see your bare décolletage. His eye lingers before he shakes his head, "you needn't worry about us. My brother and I are well."
"It was your husband that ended up badly injured," Erryk quips.
Arryk looks over to his brother. Erryk has his eyes on you, or rather, your candle. He reaches out, "allow me to relight it, my princess."
You watch him take your candle and a shiver runs down your spine as the wind blows down the quiet hall.
Arryk notices and steps aside, "it will not take long, but please, take a seat."
You walk into their room and Arryk motions to one of the beds. You take a seat and watch Erryk look through his drawers, grumbling, "where the bloody hells did I put that damn flint?"
Arryk drapes a blanket on your shoulders, rolling his eyes at his brother, "hang on."
You tighten the blanket around you, immediately feeling warm, not only because of the added layer, but because it smelled like your ward. You watch Arryk dig through his own drawers and the moment he grumbles like his twin, you realize you it was going to take long. You didn't mind at all though.
You decide to lie down and make yourself comfortable. You yawn, knowing then you were, in fact, exhausted.
Erryk decides his flint is lost and snaps at his brother, "where's your fucking flint?"
Arryk glares at back at him, "mind your manners, worm."
Erryk immediately tenses, remembering why he was looking for flint in the first place. His eyes turn to you, throat tightening to see you lying down. He steps forward, calling out your name.
Your heavy eyes open wide, only to fall again at the sight of Erryk, "hmm?"
Erryk kneels beside you, "you cannot sleep here." His hand twitches, dying to touch you.
Hearing his twin's words, Arryk turns. He rubs his chest and curses under his breath.
You merely hum again, snuggling deeper into your blankets.
Erryk speaks your name once more.
You sigh, "yes?"
"Princess," Arryk says, clenching his fists in an attempt to steel himself away, "I do not think we will find flint to light your candle."
Erryk ignores reason and listens to desire; he places a hand on your cheek, belly burning when you lean into his touch.
Arryk gulps at the sight of it. His voice is soft and shaky, "y-you cannot sleep here."
You sigh once more, finally pushing yourself up from the bed. You tighten the blanket around you with a groan. Your heavy eyes look upon Erryk, knelt on the floor, his own eyes were blown, wholly opposite to yours. You then turn to Arryk, stood rigid by his drawers. You notice the way his fingers twitch.
You place your hand on Erryk's shoulders, intending push yourself up on him, that is, until you feel the heat of him; he is impossibly hot. You examine his face, lips parting at the sight of his furrowed brows. Erryk whimpers when your colder hands come to his cheeks. He wants for nothing else than to warm you.
"Do you want me to leave?" you mutter.
Erryk immediately shakes his head. Arryk immediately calls out your name.
Erryk ignores him, eyes lowering to your neck, or what was left uncovered by your blanket.
You turn to Arryk, licking your lips before asking slowly, "do you want me to leave?"
Arryk gulps, lowering his head.
"You're welcome to leave, brother," Erryk mutters, hands coming atop yours. He hisses at the coolness of your skin and mutters rather pathetically, "please."
You ignore Erryk, eyes on his twin, "Arryk?"
Arryk scoffs, lifting his countenance. He does not say a word. He merely walks to the door and locks it before walking in front of you to kneel beside his brother.
Erryk whines when your hand leaves him. You shush him as you take Arryk's cheek, "the gods gave me two hands to hold you both at once."
Arryk leans into your touch, nearly choking on his spit at the smell of your fragrance on your wrist.
"Please," Erryk begs for the second time, "my skin grows hotter. I need to warm you."
You relish the feel of their cheeks a moment longer before pulling away completely. Their eyes watch you like a hawk and you bask in the attention before pushing the blanket off your shoulders. You sigh and nod, tilting your head back.
They are immediately upon you. Four hands roam you at once, two hot mouths on either side of your neck. They move in sync, never colliding with a hand that did not belong to them, their touches somehow contrasting yet complimenting all at once.
Arryk, ever the more level headed and patient, kisses against your throat slowly and gently. His hands work to undress you, to massage your breasts, to assure you of his devotion. Erryk, ever the more hungry and eager, licks and nips against the juncture of your neck and shoulder, though not in a manner that would ever be unpleasant. His hands work to pleasure you, to make you moan, to make known his yearning.
Like clockwork, each twin finds your most sensitive part, loath to part from your skin. Though one was as greedy as the other in their desire for you, your own desire came before theirs, and never has there been a moment where either of them kept you wanting.
You lean into Arryk, eyes screwing shut as you chase after his mouth. He does not make you wait; his hand comes to the back of your neck and the other moves to the opposite breast, pinching your nipple, knowing it will get you to moan. He immediately feasts on your moan, tongue dancing into your open mouth. His hand kneads your breast to warm it like he did the other.
Erryk, now that you were tilted to one side, takes this opportunity to part your thighs more by bringing your leg over his lap. He easily finds his way past your bloomers and rubs your clit, moaning at the feel of your building wetness.
The twins work in efficient tandem, and soon you're all three of you naked and hot. The bed for the guards are unlike your own; it was barely just enough for one, let alone three, and yet, you made it work; the desire to be close to each other made it work.
It was not enough to have Arryk pressed behind you and Erryk in front, you were desperate to have them inside, and you relayed just that by reaching for Arryk's cheeks and throwing a leg over Erryk's hips. Receptive as ever, Arryk kisses your hand and Erryk rubs your thigh.
"I need you both," you mutter.
"You have us," Arryk assures, rubbing your belly.
Erryk manages a kiss on your jaw, "who do you want first, my princess?"
"Both."
"Fuck," Erryk tightens his hold on your thigh.
Arryk's brow furrow, "are you certain?"
You whimper at the feel of fingers brushing between your legs. You mewl as someone pumps in and out you. You arch your back and ride out the sensations, "please."
"She's more than ready, brother."
"We should make her peak first."
"No," you whine, eyes opening to look at them both, "I can take it."
They are about to protest, but their words are smothered by how you grind back into Arryk and grab Erryk's cock, each as hard as the other. You pant, "we've done it before."
Arryk squeezes your hip. His voice is heavy, "a-are you certain?"
"We do not want to hurt you," Erryk softly offers.
You nod and turn to Arryk, kissing him reassuringly. You then turn to Erryk doing the same as you stroke him a few times before guiding him into you. His reaction is instant, he moans when his tip feels your wetness, and the only reason he does not plunge into you is because he holds your comfort higher than his own need.
Arryk kisses your shoulder as he leans into you. The first stretch is the one met with most resistance and he, along with his brother, always ensure you have ample time to adjust to them before even thinking of their own comfort. It's all worth it in the end, because, gods, when they're both sunked in, the feel is maddening.
The sounds that you emit when they begin to move starts soft, but both of them know better than to think it would remain. As soon as they begin to pick up the pace, they muffle your mouth with their own, assuring you have enough room to breathe though your sounds are garbled.
In truth, they could only dampen the noise so much, as there was the sinful sound of wet skin slapping to account for. Soon, the thrusting and squelching became unmistakably lewd. Soon, dampening the uncontrollable sounds scratching up your throat became near impossible.
Faster and faster and deeper and deeper and hotter and hotter and wetter and wetter— then snap.
It was good that Arryk knew your body so well that he clamped his hand over your mouth just before you clenched around their cocks. The sound that left you was loud, loud and to the bone obscene. You make another sound at the feel of them pulsing and twitching inside of you; the twins single-mindedly ride out the pleasure raging across you all with increasingly sloppier thrusts.
Arryk eventually pulls his hand off your mouth, only to replace it with his mouth, and Erryk kisses you soon after. You three remain entangled like this, hot and satisfied. You want nothing more than to sleep in their arms.
An instant stream of hot seed spills down your thighs when they pull out. You whimper in protest, never liking it when they leave you before you are ready. You're rarely ready.
They tell you what they always do, they'd never leave if they hadn't just done so, and they ought to clean you up.
And they do; they clean you up and you whimper some more, this time to complain about the cold. So there, in that tiny bed, all three of you slept, keeping each other warm.
That's when Daemon starts from his own bed, heart racing, body sweating. He is severely disoriented as he turns to the window, blinded by the morning sun, then to space on the bed beside him. He heaves as he scans the emptiness, mind racing with the terrible nightmare he had woken up from.
He scratches his eyes as tears begin to prick in its corners. He jumps, throwing the blanket aside and forfeiting slippers as he marches off. He reaches the door, but then he starts when he hears a squeal.
You gasp, one hand on your chest, another on the door sill for balance. You had just emerged from the bath, startled to see him sprinting off.
Daemon immediately comes to your side, gripping your arm. He notices the smell of your soap first, then the presence of your servants behind you second. He gives them a look and leads you off, silently dismissing them.
Your servants scurry off as Daemon leads you to your vanity.
You look at him, noticing the manic expression on his face, "is everything alright?"
He does not turn to you as he sits you down.
"Is there somewhere you need to be?"
"You," he blurts and shakes his head rapidly, "I was looking for you."
You watch him scratch his eyes. He takes the comb on your vanity and only once he's untangling your hair do you see from his reflection that he looked distraught and teary. You mutter, "Daemon-"
"When did you come bed?"
Your brows quirk and you're about to respond, until he yanks through a tangle, causing you to wince.
Daemon stops and immediately shakes his head as he looks at your reflection, "I did not mean to."
You frown, slowly enunciating, "Dae-"
"Do not answer," he clenches your comb in his hand.
He looks erratic. Your heart rate picks up, "what?"
"I change my mind. I do not want to know when you came to bed," he shakes his head, combing through your hair again. You swear you see his hands shake as he does. He whispers to himself, "or if you came back at all."
You do not catch it, but you do catch his hand, forcing him to stop combing.
Daemon shivers as you come to a stand. You look at him, face falling at the tears so suddenly streaming down his face. You furrow your brows and reach for his cheek. You are taken aback when he pulls away.
You gulp, unsure if you should step forward or back. You decide to stay put and slowly call out to him.
Daemon wipes his face, "I-"
"Is it the wake?"
"..."
Your own eyes begin to water, "... did you, perhaps, have a nightmare?"
He is at a loss for words. He flinches when you take a step forward.
You watch him closely as you raise your hand. He does not move away up until you touch his arm. You must admit, the way in which he shrugs you off stings. Still, you compose yourself with a sigh and nod. "Very well," you step back.
His hand raises, "wait."
You are rendered frozen when he grabs your arm. Your chest begins to tighten and your eyes begin to water against yourself. You shrug and chuckle dryly, "I do not understand."
Daemon's face is pained as he releases you. He lowers his head and steps back, "neither do I."
You both stand there for a moment. You wait for him to say something but he never does. In truth, Daemon was waiting for you to do the same.
He was rather disappointed to hear you say, "perhaps you should take a bath."
He watches you wipe the tears off your cheek and wonders why it was tears found you so easily. Was it your affliction? Or just him? He nods, "very well."
Your gaze is fixed upon him as he heads to the bathroom. You sigh deeply, sitting back in your vanity chair to gather yourself.
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rowdyluv · 5 months ago
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The Girl I’m in Love With lf63
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summary: Luca is desperately trying to find someone who can be comparable to his best friend, who he is hopelessly in love with. He’s gone on date after date, all of which fail. He meets a girl online who he hits it off with does it work or is it another bust because of his best friend?
warnings: use of y/n, singular use of pretty girl, no others?
word count: 4.1k
notes: please do not copy my work to post anywhere else. this is a piece of fiction. any type of event in this work that relates to the real world, such as Luca playing hockey is a known fact and can be proven. any other events in the piece of work that occurs that seems close to a real life event that has happened to you or someone you know, is purely by happen chance.
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Luca stared at his reflection in the mirror, fumbling with his tie. The fabric felt like a noose around his neck, tightening with every twist. He took a deep breath, trying to calm his racing heart. The cologne he had picked up off Mark’s dresser smelled faintly of his own grandfather's pipe tobacco, and he hoped it would be a good omen for the evening ahead. His date was a woman named Elena, someone he had met through an app. They had talked for a few weeks now, sharing laughs and stories, but now that the day to go out was here, he felt like he was about to step into a minefield blindfolded with extra phalanges attached to him.
He checked his phone one last time. No messages from Y/N, his best friend. Her absence today was a bitter reminder of how every time he goes out with someone he thinks of her. His mind floods with what could bes if he would just tell her. If he would just let their relationship move over their line of friendship. Y/n and Luca already have many memories of shared jokes, quiet moments, and the way she looked at him when she thought he wasn't watching. Luca had been on numerous failed dates over the semester, all in an attempt to fill the gaping hole that was meant for her. All dates ending early because Luca couldn’t find the heart to stay when his heart wasn’t in it.
It was all so infuriating, but tonight he was determined to put the thoughts aside. If Y/n could put him to the side the whole day, he could put her to side.
The doorbell rang, and Luca took one last deep breath before opening the door to greet Elena. She was beautiful, with a smile that could light up the room.
‘Sure, it could lighten up the room, but could it lighten the darkest of rooms?’ Luca’s thoughts pierced through the barricades he tried so desperately to place for the evening.
Luca discreetly swallowed and tried to ignore the pang of guilt in his chest as he led her to the car.
‘You can’t do this again. Don’t do this again.’
Those words echoed through Luca’s mind as he reached the car. Before Elena could even get her hand on the door handle, he turned to face her with a heavy heart. The streetlights cast an orange glow on her puzzled expression, and he felt the weight of his confession pressing down on him like a boulder. “Elena, wait please.” Luca’s voice wasn’t as strong as it usually was and he mentally cursed himself.
Elena paused, looking at him with genuine concern. “Is everything okay, Luca?”
For a moment, Luca wavered, unsure of how to explain the tornado of emotions swirling inside him. But then, the words spilled out like water from a broken dam. “I’m sorry, Elena. I know we were looking forward to this, but I can’t do this. I can’t go out with you, knowing that all I’ll do is compare you to someone else. It’s not fair to you, and it’s definitely not fair to me.” His eyes searched hers, hoping she’d understand.
Elena studied him, her smile fading into a look of quiet contemplation. Then, she sighed and took his hand, leading him back towards the apartment. “Come on, let’s talk,” she said gently. The warmth of her touch was surprisingly comforting, but it only served to amplify the ache in his chest.
Inside the air was thick with unspoken truths and the scent of Elena’s perfume seemed to cling to the walls, a testament to their failed attempt at a normal evening. After turning on lamps and grabbing them both bottles of water, Luca took a seat on the recliner, feeling the leather conform to his tense body. Elena took a seat opposite him on the couch, her eyes never leaving his.
“Who is she?” Elena asked, her voice soft. It was the question Luca had been dreading, but now that it was out there, why keep it in anymore?
“Her name’s Y/N,” Luca began, his throat dry. He could chug his water and his throat would remain dry.
He watched as Elena nodded, she had her ideas about this. The way he spoke about y/n when they talked prior to tonight gave indications.
He took a deep breath, his heart thumping in his chest like a drum. Beating so intensely all he could hear was the sound of the lub and dub of his heart. “Y/N is... she’s the person who knows me better than anyone else. She’s seen me at my worst and still sticks around. She laughs at all my jokes, even the terrible ones. She’s the first person I call when something amazing happens, or when I need to rant about my day. And every time I go out with someone else, it’s like I’m cheating on her, because all I can think about is her. Whenever the food is ordered I’m still ordering food I know she’s going to eat because she always orders something new and ends up hating it, so I have to eat her’s and I give her what she really wanted. I think about the way she’d laugh at the same story, or how she’d look at me in that perfect moment when I know she’s listening, really listening, to every word I say. How I always seem to catch her looking at me and she’ll turn a little bit red, then try to deny that she was looking. It’s like I’m constantly holding onto this hope that maybe, just maybe, she feels the same way too. And I know that’s not fair to you, or to any of the other girls I’ve gone out with, but it’s just... she’s different, Elena. She’s the air I breathe and the reason I wake up every morning. I can’t help it. She has become so much more than just my best friend. She’s... she’s like a piece of me that I didn’t know was missing until I found her… A piece that’s actually been missing from today and my whole day feels empty. I feel empty.”
Elena’s expression softened as she listened, her eyes filling then spilling over with a few tears. She herself knowing all too well how he was feeling. Elena experiencing the same feelings, only her best friend is already in a relationship. She’s pining for someone completely unattainable.
The room was so quiet, it was as if the air itself was holding its breath, waiting for her response. She leaned all the way back into the couch, her hand playing with the hem of her dress. “Luca, she said, her voice a gentle caress. “You need to tell her how you feel. You can’t keep going on like this, hoping she’ll just figure it out by some miracle or waiting for some grand romantic moment to happen. Life isn’t a movie, and she may have no idea that you have the slightest bit of romantic interest in her. And if she doesn’t feel the same way, then at least you’ll know, and then you can move on. But if you don’t speak up and you keep going out like you are, you’re going to keep hurting yourself and the people you take out. It’s not fair to either of parties involved.”
Luca dropped his head into his hands and tugged at his hair, the words echoing in his mind like a caged bird desperate to escape. What if he did tell Y/N and she didn’t feel the same way? Would she look at him differently? Would their friendship survive? The thought of losing her in any capacity was too much to bear, but the heaviness of his secret was slowly suffocating him.
Elena reached over and placed a comforting hand on his knee. “I know it’s scary, Luca, but you can’t keep living like this. You’re my friend now, too, and I want to see you happy. You need to talk to her. Maybe she does feel the same, or maybe she doesn’t. But at least you’ll have the answer and you can move on from there. Whether it’s together or apart, you’ll be able to breathe again.”
Her words were like a jolt of electricity, shocking him into action. “You’re right, Elena. I can’t do this anymore. I’ll go over now. If I wait, I won’t do it. I’ve waited too long already,” Luca said, the decision made with a suddenness that surprised even himself. He stood up abruptly, the recliner rocking back and forth with the force of his retreat.
Elena nodded, her smile understanding and encouraging. “I know it’s scary, but you’ll be okay. Just go from the heart and tell her what you told me. Sometimes, that’s all it takes to start something beautiful, or to find the closure you need. Either way, you’re taking a step in the right direction.”
Luca took a deep breath, his chest tightening at the thought of what lay ahead. “Thank you, Elena. You’re a great listener, and... well, I’m sorry tonight didn’t work out the way we planned.” He offered a small, sheepish smile.
She laughed a bit and rolled her eyes reaching the front door. As she was stepping out it she waved, “Good luck Fantilli. Not that you’ll need it.”
The door shut with a gentle click, and Luca stood in the quiet embrace of the living room. His hand hovered over the screen of his phone, fingers trembling slightly. With a deep breath, he typed out a simple message: “Hey, I’m coming over.” He hit send before he could talk himself out of it, and the weight of his decision settled in his stomach like a rock.
In the hallway, he grabbed his jacket and keys, feeling the cool metal against his palm. The urgency in his step as he dashed to the car was almost palpable. His heart was racing like it was trying to escape his chest, the beat echoing in his ears. The headlights cut through the night, illuminating the path to Y/N’s apartment.
As he pulled up outside her building, Luca’s hands gripped the steering wheel tightly. The tie that had felt like a noose earlier was now a comforting reminder of his resolve. He took one long deep breath, willing the words to form in his mouth. He had rehearsed this moment in his head many times, probably each time he ended up here after each failed date. But now that it was real, his thoughts were a tangled mess.
His phone buzzed in his pocket, and he pulled it out with trembling hands. He had hoped for an enthusiastic response, a sign that she felt the same way. But what he saw on the screen was a single, desolate word: "Don't." His heart plummeted to his stomach, the weight of it feeling like it might drag him into the abyss. He read it over and over again, willing it to change, for it to be a typo, a misunderstanding. But the more he read it, the more real it became.
He sat in the car, his eyes glued to the door of her apartment building. The red neon sign of the pizzeria across the street flickered, casting an eerie glow over the sidewalk. The rain had started to fall, and it pattered rhythmically against the car's windshield. Luca always respected and never ignored what Y/n asked of him. But this was something that he couldn't ignore. This was about them. He had to talk to her, no matter what she said.
Pulling a shaky a deep breath in, he shoved his phone back into his pocket and stepped out into the night. The cold rain hit him like a wall, soaking through his clothes in seconds. He sprinted to the building, feeling the water seep into his shoes with every step. His heart hammered in his chest like a drummer in a rock band, setting the tempo for his chaotic thoughts.
The lobby was a welcome respite from the downpour, the warmth wrapping around him like a blanket. The scent of old carpet and faint whispers of rain-soaked earth filled the small space. He took the stairs two at a time to the third floor, his feet echoing off the walls. Each step felt like it was taking an eternity. The door to Y/N’s apartment was like a gateway to the unknown, and Luca’s hand hovered over the knocker, his heart threatening to break through his ribcage. The anticipation was a tangible force, pressing against him like the very air itself was holding its breath.
With a tremble, he brought his fist down and the sound reverberated through the corridor. The seconds that followed felt like hours, each one a silent scream in his ears. Finally, the door creaked open, and there she was, her eyes wide with surprise and a hint of annoyance. “I told you don’t come over,” she said, her voice carrying the weight of a thousand unspoken words.
Luca shivered, not just from the cold rainwater that clung to him like a second skin but from the sudden realization that this might be the moment that changes everything. He stepped closer, the droplets of water falling from his clothes creating a small puddle around his feet. “I know, I know you did, but I had to see you, to tell you something. Something I can’t keep inside anymore.”
Y/N and Luca lock eyes for only a moment. A moment is all Luca needs to notice the red discoloration and puffiness that circles her eyes. “Y/n, why have you been crying?” The words slipped out before he could stop them. The look of shock on her face was quickly replaced by one of irritation.
“That’s none of your business, Luca. What do you want?” Her voice was tight, and she held the door open only a crack. The apartment behind her was dark, save for the flicker of a TV screen.
“I know I shouldn’t have come up after you said no, but I couldn’t ignore your message. Y/N, is everything okay?” He asked again, his voice softer this time, filled with genuine concern. “Well no, clearly no everything isn’t okay.” Luca corrected running the back of his neck. “We’ve not talked all day, you didn’t respond to my texts or answer my calls. What’s going on?”
Y/N took a deep breath, the kind that fills the chest but doesn’t seem to reach the lungs. She stepped aside and opened the door wider, gesturing for him to come in. The apartment was a mess of used tissues and half-eaten takeout. It was a drastic difference to the usual pristine state she maintained. “I don’t know what to say, Luca. I’ve had a rough day, and I don’t really feel like company right now.” She said, her voice a sad whisper.
He stepped inside, his eyes scanning the room, taking in the sadness that seemed to have painted the walls a darker shade. The TV played some old sitcom, the laugh track echoing through the emptiness like a mockery of her current state. He followed her into the living room, his eyes never leaving hers. The rain had left a trail of water droplets from the door to where they now stood, a sad metaphor displayed through him for her feelings.
“You said you needed to tell me something? Something about you can’t keep it inside anymore? Must be important to come here after another date. So go on, do tell.” Y/n words barely passed over the knot in her throat, the tears in her eyes miraculously held back. Her arms were crossed over the center of her body and she was standing more to one leg than the other. She was giving Luca a look that screamed, “why are you here when you have someone else”
Luca felt his heart drop into his stomach, his earlier resolve now a distant memory. He took a step back, his hand running through his hair.
“I... I didn’t go on the date. I called it off. Because I couldn’t do it anymore. I couldn’t pretend to be interested in someone else when all I can think about is you.” Luca gasped for air he was talking so fast. “Every laugh, every smile, every moment of connection that they claim to feel with me is a joke. Because all I want is to be with you, to be experiencing it with you, not them. You’re the one I want to share my life with, Y/N. You’re the one who gets me, who understands me, who makes me feel alive. I don’t want to live in a world where I can’t hold your hand, kiss your forehead, tell you how much you mean to me every single day. I don’t want to be just your best friend anymore. I want to be your everything, like you’re my everything. That is if you’ll let me.”
The words hung in the air like a question mark, heavy and pregnant with hope and fear. Y/N’s eyes searched his, looking for any sign of deceit, but all she found was raw honesty and pure love. And in that moment, she knew she had to tell him the truth. The tears began to flow, a river of emotions that had been damned up for so long. But she was smiling, a smile that was a battleground of happiness and sadness.
“Luca, I didn’t talk to you today because I was hoping if I didn’t and the date went bad you wouldn’t come here and get my hopes up again. I’ve been feeling the same way for a while now, but I didn’t know how to tell you. I didn’t want to risk losing you as a friend. You’re everything to me, Luca, but I was scared of what would happen if we tried to be more. What if we ruined what we have?” Her voice was shaky, but the words tumbled out like they had been waiting for this moment for an eternity.
Luca’s heart raced with something other than anxiety for the first time the whole day, hope. He stepped closer, taking her hand in his, feeling the warmth of her skin against his cold palm. “We won’t mess this up, I promise you. We have something real, something strong. And if, by chance, we do, we’ll fix it together, just like we do with everything else. I can’t keep pretending that I don’t want to be with you. I want to be there for you, not just as your best friend, but as your boyfriend. To hold you when you’re sad, to cuddle with you while you watch tv, to annoy you when you’re stressed, to be the first person you see when you wake up. I want you to wear my jersey to my games and make yourself a jacket for playoffs. I want all of that, Y/N. With you. And I know we can do it. We just have to trust each other and take this chance.”
She knew he was right, they had to take this risk. They had been dancing around each other for too long, afraid of what might happen if they stepped too close. But here they were, their hearts laid bare in the middle of a stormy night. “So…does this make me your girlfriend?” Y/n asked with a sly smile across her face.
“Damn right it does.” Luca beamed.
Without another word, Luca stepped forward, wrapping his arms around her in a fierce embrace. The cold, wet fabric of his shirt and tie seeped through her clothes, and she let out a squeal of surprise. “You’re going to get me soaked!” she giggled, but she didn’t pull away. Instead, she leaned into him, her hands coming up to rest on his shoulders.
The tension in the room dissipated like the storm outside, replaced by a warmth that filled every corner of the apartment. They stood there for a moment, just holding each other, feeling the beat of their hearts sync up like they had always been meant to. Then, Luca leaned down and kissed her, his lips pressing gently against hers. The kiss was soft and tentative at first, as if they were both afraid that this was another one of those fleeting moments that they’d wake up from. But as she responded, kissing him back with the same passion that had been reflected in her eyes, he knew that this was real.
They broke apart, both breathing heavily, and Y/N spoke again, her voice still shaky with emotion. “You have clothes here if you want to stay,” she said shyly, gesturing towards her bedroom door at the end of the hallway. Her offer was filled with unspoken promises of lazy mornings and shared secrets whispered in the dark.
Luca’s smile grew even wider, the corners of his eyes crinkling with happiness. “Only if you want me to stay,” he said, his voice low and earnest. He didn’t want to assume anything, not now that the walls had finally come down. His right hand moved to cup her cheek, “if I do stay, I can sleep out here like before. I want you comfortable.”
Y/N looked up at him, the sadness in her eyes slowly fading away. She nodded, her voice a soft whisper. “But I want you to stay with me. I want to wake up next to you, not just in the same apartment. I want to fall asleep listening to your breathing, knowing you’re right there beside me.” She took his hand and led him to her room, the TV faded out into the background as they disappeared down the hallway.
Luca’s smile felt like it could split his face in two. He followed her, his heart feeling lighter than it had in weeks. The room was a mess of blankets and pillows, a testament to her emotional turmoil from earlier. He took off his soaked jacket and laid it over the chair, the tie joining it like a snake shedding its skin. She handed him one of his old hockey t-shirts and a pair of shorts.
As he changed, his eyes kept darting back to her, watching her in the mirror. She was so beautiful, even in her sadness. He didn’t know how he’d ever thought he could keep his feelings hidden.
The shirt that was once too big for him, was now too small. “Uh, I don’t think this is going to work.” Luca laughed. He took it back off and tossed it over to y/n. When she put it on, the shirt went down just above midthigh. “I sleep shirtless most of the time anyways” Luca shrugged, still admiring her.
They both climbed into the bed, the mattress dipping slightly under their weight. Y/N laid her head over Luca’s heart, listening to the steady rhythm that matched her own. The rain outside had turned into a gentle pitter-patter, almost a lullaby for the two of them. “Thank you for coming over, even when I said not to,” she murmured, her voice muffled by his chest.
Luca tightened his arms around her, the warmth of her body seeping into his cold skin. “I couldn’t stay away, not when I finally grew a pair and was ready to go for what I wanted.”
They lay there, their hearts beating in a duet that filled the quiet room. The rain outside had turned into a soothing lullaby, lulling them into a peaceful silence. Y/N’s eyes grew heavy, and she nuzzled closer to Luca’s chest, feeling the comforting rise and fall of his breathing.
“Good night, Luca,” she whispered, her breath a soft caress against his skin.
He kissed the top of her head, feeling her cheek grow warmer against his chest. “Good night, pretty girl,” he murmured back, his voice thick with emotion and grogginess.
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pomefioredove · 5 months ago
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Noble Bell ; prologue
what if you were sent to Noble Bell College instead?
type of post: (possible) series characters: rollo (barely mentioned), original characters additional info: reader is gender neutral, this is largely my own vision, I wrote this all in one sitting and it shows LOL, word count: 3.1k author's note: after several failed drafts, I decided to just write my thoughts on noble bell as a story. do tell me what you think and if I should continue, if you have the chance!
prologue | the king of truands, 1 | the king of truands, 2 |
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It appeared as if, for all its hundreds of years of life, very little of Noble Bell College had changed. 
The original face, or what is left of it at this time, is almost indistinguishable from the prints of great artists who lived when the City of Flowers was still but three parts of one whole. If it were not for her clothes, those great banners of cotton which hang from her walls and surround her like the ruffles of an unflattering dress, that which cradle the insignia of a college in wine-colored hands, that pointed fleur de lis in gold, Noble Bell College would be the very picture of her younger self. 
The halls which extend from one end of her body to the other like the grotesque wings of a pigeon were added after the University, which had once been confined to its own division on the left side of the River Soleil, had consumed the island of the City, that which had, at one time, cradled twenty-one of these magnificent buildings, and now had only one. Noble Bell became a skeletal reminder of its medieval past. 
Now, what was once a ground of solemnity and penance, and other ancient things, had given a painful birth to a different sort of self-punishment, that of academia. Noble Bell dawned its new clothes and its new name, and became a home of scholars, a place of enlightened thought. The island that had once been a sanctuary for the sacred became its final resting place. The College was built over hallowed ground. 
The body of the Gothic building had gone, in some parts, untouched, however, the later additions, done in the style Haussmann some hundreds of years after, coil around her like the chains of a falsely accused prisoner, or the noose around a beggar's neck. 
Statues on the face, neglected, crumbled into dust. The colored glass in the lecture halls were replaced with white windows for better light. Every hundred years, some haughty new headmaster would consider cutting down the building herself, and putting something new and ugly in her stead. 
Nothing would ever come of it. 
It is important to note, dear reader, that though the past of religion and superstition had been abandoned by the scholars of Noble Bell in pursuit of the enlightened future of thought, with it went only the body, not the soul. 
The students of Noble Bell began to look upon their history with pride, rather than disdain, and thus the construction on the lady ceased, and the reconstruction started up. In some aspects, it was too late; the medieval glass had already been sold and repurposed into bottles which floated at the surface of the Soleil, the stone turned to dust and carried into the wind. 
This romanticized past was tainted with a bitter guilt, one that struck even the proudest of freshmen when they met the eyes of the statues which guarded the building and her history. A sense of possession consumed the heart of the student body, and, thus, a gate was built. It was sanctuary no more. 
A romantic would tell you that it is the love of the people that kept the heart of Noble Bell alive. 
This is not true; it is guilt. 
To the wise man, the realist, the freshman who feared the eyes of the statues, the traditions that carried on were as meaningful as digging up a rotting corpse and putting it on trial. Without the superstition, it was a delusion, a pathetic attempt at absolution for the sins of the scholar and the printing press. 
Enlightenment became repulsive to him. 
What was in the hollow halls of the Haussmann was never alive, and what had survived the purge of time and man was hidden in the bell tower for few to touch. 
To the wise man, the only absolution of sin was through the fire. 
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Your heart wakes you before your body.
That is to say, the feeling of dread, of knowing you are somewhere you shouldn't be, comes before the biting cold and the splinters pressing against your back.
The inky water surrounding you in three directions (the fourth being the stone mouth of the river) nearly cradles you back to sleep. Your rest was quite comfortable. You can't remember the last time you slept like that.
Your mind is the very last to wake, and it is what finally forces your body up in a sudden jolt, uneasily rocking the boat which had become your manger.
You grip both sides until it steadies, which gives you enough time to adjust to the dark.
One thing becomes quite clear: This is not where you fell asleep.
Then, another: This is not what you were wearing before.
The delicate fabric, hand-dyed in wine and blood red, is like nothing you own. Where had these come from? Surely, not your closet.
And, more worrying: how did you get in them?
Take a moment, if you will, to look beyond the black water of the river: next to you, on your right, is a stone embankment, with a short ledging that extends only to a single flight of stairs. The wall is so high you cannot see above that.
Now, look behind you: there is one fabulous bridge, also of stone, arching above the water in a mesmerizing pirouette. Warm light spills from its sides and dances on the inky waters below.
Ahead of you is only more river and stone.
And then, on your right again, is screaming.
You had heard screams before, but none like this. This is bloody murder, save me screaming, the sort that makes you jump and run to its source without thinking first.
You climb out of the trembling boat, the sound of your footsteps scuffing against stone following you across the landing and up the steps.
Yet again you are stopped.
Rising above the embankment of the river as if ascending to heaven itself, reaching through the thin evening clouds and into the stars, are two magnificent bell towers.
Your steps slow, and then stop at the peak of the stairs to admire the body of the building, illuminated by street lamps and candlelight, blanketed in a fog of distant laughter.
You have never seen such an unearthly sight.
If not for the screaming, you could have spent days there.
But you are motivated once more to follow the strange sound, and, perhaps, find out where on earth you are.
Like a princess in a tower, the building is guarded by a rather impressive gate, not done in the style of the place itself, but sightly nonetheless. If it were not already left open and vulnerable by some obvious human error, you might not have found a way in.
The sound of your footsteps follows you across the stone, and you stop at the base of a staircase that would have led you to a set of inhuman wooden doors.
And... there is a goat.
A pretty, white little thing, with a bow around its neck.
it turns to you as you stop, and it makes that same screaming noise, and then bounds off around the corner of the building and into another, attached at its side.
"Wait," you say.
Though, your feet move before your mouth, your mouth before your mind, and you suddenly find yourself following this odd twist of a white rabbit.
The delicate thing leaps through an opening in the side, and you climb in after it, chasing it down open-air hallways that remind you all too much of an old monastery.
The goat bleats. "Wait!" you say. "Where is your owner?"
It bleats again, and it almost sounds like a laugh. How strange...
You tumble down corridors and halls, turn corners, ignoring the sound of laughter and cheering that is growing ever so close, and, all at once, you stumble out into the warm light of a party, crashing into something cold and metal. The goat disappears in the crowd.
Everything is silent.
You can see nothing but feet from where you fell, and a hundred hems of wine and blood red. Your clothes.
"Who is that?" someone asks.
"They weren't at orientation,"
"How could anyone be late? That's never happened,"
"They don't look like a student of Noble Bell..."
Student? So this is a school?
"You," a voice says, much colder and sharper than the others, like a winter breeze. "Get up."
You are in no place to disobey.
You stand, uneasily, and, much to your displeasure, every head in the crowd is turned towards you. Whispers dance amongst the students, glances are exchanged, looks ranging from confusion to disdain.
There is only one face you cannot see. At one distant end of the courtyard, there is a stage, dressed in reds and oranges, and on it, four actors. They are as still as the crowd, seemingly having abandoned their play in favor of the mysterious stranger.
The person in question, then, is actually below them, whispering something quite loudly, but you cannot make it out at this distance.
"Your name?"
You turn back to the wintry voice.
This man, you notice, is dressed differently from the others. He's in all black, from his boots to the cloak around him, even his hair, which flows around his shoulders, is as inky as the cold water of the river you had woken on.
"My name?" you ask.
He scoffs. "It is a simple request,"
"Shall we return to the mystery?" a weak, artificially high-pitched voice calls from the front of the crowd. "I'd like to see the mystery continue!"
"Quiet, Gregoire," the man in black snaps. "Now, who are you to come so late?"
"Late to what?"
A few murmurs ripple through the stillness of the crowd.
He sniffles, turning his nose up at you. "You do not know where you are?"
"No,"
Someone begins to whisper. "Do you think they're from-"
"Quiet!" he demands. "This is clearly not a student of any arcane academy I know of."
"They're wearing our robes!"
You look down at yourself. You'd almost forgotten about that.
The boy narrows his eyes. "How did you get here?"
"I don't know. I woke up on a boat,"
He sighs. "What part of the city are you from?"
"...The city?"
Another moment of whispers and stares. The crowd seems to have all but forgotten the play happening at the mouth of the courtyard.
The man in black puts his hands on his hips. "Yes. Now, what division are you from? The old university? The Ville?"
"I, um... none of those,"
"The outskirts, then?"
"No. What city is this?"
His brow furrows, and he crosses his arms. At the very least, he no longer seems angry. More... thoughtful.
"What country are you from?"
You tell him, and he huffs.
"There is no such place. None that I have heard of,"
The same voice from earlier returns. "Perhaps we should wait until after the mystery has concluded-"
"Gregoire!" the man in black snaps, "We know it's you! Quiet, for once in your life!"
"...Very well,"
He grumbles, massaging his temples, and then turns back to you. His eyes are as sharp and focused as his voice. They're dark, almost black, with the faintest gleam of red. He's wearing a lot of eyeliner, you think.
"Come with me. If you are telling the truth, then you will have nothing to fear,"
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"There is no such place,"
"That's what I said!" the boy exclaims, swiping the atlas off the desk.
The headmaster of this school is old, much older than you are imagining now, thought perhaps it is not the fault of age, but of weariness.
"Control yourself, Monsieur de Neige," he says, looking longingly at the book whose pages are now scattered across the floor.
The boy grumbles, giving you a nasty side-eye.
"What will we do with them?"
"What else? They will stay here until we can find an answer. I will reach out to my colleagues at the other arcane academies and see if they have any council,"
"Stay here?" he snaps, standing from his chair with such force that it goes flying backward, narrowly missing you from where you're standing against the wall.
"They are not a student of Noble Bell. They are a stranger! Who knows what they might-"
"Now," the headmaster sighs. "I know we are a... private institution. But a long time ago, this building was a sanctuary for outcasts."
He grits his teeth. "I am not willing to risk the safety of the building or its students for an act of pity. You should know that I take my duties as vice president of the student council quite seriously-,"
The corner you'd been backed into was starting to feel tighter and tighter. If not for the conversation, you'd-
Out of the corner of your eye, you catch the heavy wooden door of the office opening, but a sliver, and something white just outside.
Your eyes widen. You glance between M. de Neige and the headmaster, and, in the throes of their heated argument, you slip out into the dark hall.
"You," you say, putting your hands on your hips.
The little goat bleats. It doesn't seem very guilty.
"You led me there on purpose, didn't you? To create a diversion? What did you want?'
It stomps and scuffs its hooves against the stone floor, and with another little bleat, it turns around itself to show you something.
Your eyes soften.
There are two apples on the floor beneath it, both bruised and wrinkled, but good nonetheless.
"For me?"
You stoop forward and take one of the browning fruits off the cold, dirty ground, and slip it into one of the wide pockets of the robe. The goat chuffs, clearly pleased, and not even you can help but smile.
"Let's go, then, shall we? I want to get out of this place,"
The hallway is pitch black, the moonlight subdued by clouds and softened by the thick windows, but you can still make your way around quite easily.
You start heading in the direction you came, your new (and only) friend in tow, when the sound of footsteps scuffing against stone follows you.
You turn, eyes wide, expecting M. de Neige, or worse, but there's only a flash of gold and then quiet.
"Who's there? Come out, now, or... my goat will gouge you!"
The little animal stares at you, mouth hanging open in bewilderment, but it seems to work, anyway.
A boy, taller and thinner than M. de Neige, comes out from around the corner with his hands held up. Even in the dull silver light of the hall, you can make out the color of his eyes. Green. His hair is blond and reaches his chin, and is rather unkempt, curling and sticking out at odd places. His straight bangs are clearly cut by his own hand.
"My-my apologies. I did not mean to frighten you. I was only curious,"
You sigh. It's the voice from the orientation festival, the one M. de Neige called Gregoire.
"Well, don't be. We're leaving," you say. "Now... which way is out?"
"There are more than one, if you know where to look,"
You narrow your eyes at him and he goes pale.
"I-I only mean that there are many ways out into the streets, but you wouldn't want to be alone in the city after curfew,"
"I think I can handle it,"
"It's unsafe,"
"Is it?"
"Veritably,"
He doesn't seem to be lying, at least. You let your arms fall to your sides with a sigh.
"But I can't stay here. This feels like a prison,"
"It may," he nods. "It is stone walls all the same. But you don't have to stay here. The dorms are but a short walk away."
The goat bleats, and you agree. You're not sure whether you can trust this man or not, yet.
"What's your name?"
He seems to stand a little straighter, almost eager to talk about himself.
"I am the author Pierrot Gregoire, whose mystery was presented in the courtyard this evening,"
You seem to recall his voice again, his back turned to you in the crowd, as if he were infinitely more interested in his play than the commotion.
"I remember you," you say, sticking your hands in your pockets. You feel around the apple you'd put in there earlier. "Sorry I ruined it."
"The people were losing interest either way," he sighs and hangs his head. "My poor mystery..."
You glance at the little goat, and it chuffs back, nodding its head towards the end of the hall as if telling you to make a break for it while he's distracted.
You can't bring yourself to.
"Here," you say, handing him the shriveled apple. "We're even, then."
Pierrot's entire disposition changes; his face lights up with a childlike joy that makes it seem as if he'd completely forgotten about his woes, and he cups the apple in his palm with reverence.
"Oh... thank you," he says, finally. "I will take you to the dorms."
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The evening had grown cold and windy since your spectacle in the courtyard.
The robes, at least, are warm enough to keep you comfortable, although you feel a pang of sympathy for the poor goat, who has only its fur, and, in a way, for Pierrot, whose robes look worn and beaten and strangely burnt.
"You can stay with me in the spare house," he says.
"You don't stay in a dorm?"
"My housewarden threw me to the streets months ago,"
He says it merrily, with that same smile, but there's an underlying sense of bitterness. You don't ask about it again.
Pierrot brings you to a small, dark building at the very edge of the island. Once again, you are surrounded by inky black water.
"Here," he hums, lighting a single candle as you walk in. "It's not much, but better than the sewers."
"You've slept in the sewers?"
He shudders. "I don't want to talk about it,"
Once an adequate amount of candles are lit, he pulls up a chest for you to sit on, and takes a seat on the floor across from you.
You sigh, letting out the stress and tension you'd been carrying in your chest in a single breath.
It felt much later than it truly was.
"That is a pretty creature of yours," he says, nodding at your goat. "Does it have a name?"
"Hugo," it says.
Both you and Pierrot go silent.
Then, finally, you shout.
"You can talk?!"
179 notes · View notes
weird-addiction · 6 months ago
Note
Hai! It's me again. I read one and the same and I was FLOORED!! Could you do a part two when they're both grown up and it's the dinner scene (you know the one). I love to see what you put together ❤️
~snake anon 🐍
One in the Same Part 2
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Pairing: Platonic!Aemond Targaryen x Male!Twin!Targaryen!Reader
Genre: Neutral
Warnings: The dinner scene from Ep 8, calling others bastards, mentions of missing eyes, some book canon, typical violence
A/N: sorry it has been so long ಥ_ಥ I wrote this a while back but forgot to post. Here it is now. Happy Season 2!
It has been 16 years since the days that the single-eyed princes had claimed their dragons and had made it known to the people of Westeros now that they were the greatest threat to the realm, using that fear to make sure that no one else crossed them ever again. 
Now, the rightful queen had come back to defend her son’s claim to Driftmark. Aemond and Y/n were out in the training yard when they arrived. Aemond was busy sparring with Ser Criston, Y/n was the one that spotted them both. And from the looks of it, they saw him as well, however, there was almost immediate fear in their eyes. 
No one in Westeros could deny that it was uneasy to look at the two single-eyed princes, especially the younger of the two. As the younger, he would lash out more easily as he took the pleasure of seeing other cower in fear in front of him. Even their own elder brother Aegon could say the same about him. As Y/n was normally the one to slap him awake when he got blackout drunk.
Within the throne room of the Red Keep, both sides of the family stood on opposite sides of the room, the separation was obvious to anyone who had sense. Everyone but the king that was. 
Vaemond and Viserys were having a stand off at the moment as they argued over who should get the claim to Driftmark. Vaemond eventually had enough as he turned to Rhaenyra and her family, he yelled loudly as he spoke of his disgust that her sons were not his nephews.
“Her children…are BASTARDS!” He yelled, his body language telling that this was all genuine and none of it was fake. 
“And she is…a whore.” He was smiling at the end of his sentence, like he knew he had nothing left to lose. 
“I mean…we don’t really know, do we? Princess Rhaenys has black hair soo…” Y/n whispers to his twin, Aemond leaned over smiling as he responded. 
“But it is still a possibility isn’t it?” Aemond ruled out, to which his twin nodded. 
They turned back to the drama at hand, and as of the same second, Daemon had cut off the top half of Vaemond’s head; just above where his tongue was. 
Aemond had gone into a defensive stance as almost to shield his twin, Y/n was holding Helaena in his arms as she had her hands over her ears. He rubbed her back slowly, offering what comfort he could in that moment. 
The trial was soon over and nightfall came fast, and by the king’s request, both sides of the family were to have supper together. Aemond and Y/n were both quite hesitant to attend, as they were known to start conflicts even if slightly offended or pissed off. Before their father had arrived, the three sons stood off to the side as they had a random conversation. More or so it was Aegon telling them both to drink more.
“You both do not drink enough.” Aegon says. 
“You drink more than a Braavosi seahorse.” Aemond retorts. His twin let out a laugh.
“I drink just the right amount.” Aegon responds, one could even hear the eye roll on his voice.
“Right. Tell me that next time when I have to dump cold water on your head to wake you up.” Y/n says, amused by the eldest. 
“You just have a high tolerance. The most you have downed is three cups.” 
“Don’t compare me to you, brother. At least tonight, you have a reason to get drunk. It seems we all do.” Y/n looked back to the long dinner table, their mother and half-sister were not talking. Tensions were already rising and the dinner had not even started. 
“The noose is tied and they expect us to break bread.” Aemond says, to which, Y/n had to hold onto his arm to calm him down a bit.
“You can fight later. At least, when they offend you. Have a reason at least.” Y/n spoke, clearly also having thoughts of needing to let off some steam.
The dinner soon started and for the first while, everything was fine at the beginning as the music made it so the atmosphere was less tense. Everyone was at ease and talking with a smile on their face. 
Aemond sat at one end of the table, Y/n was to his right, sitting just next to Helaena. They were exchanging words every once in a while as the younger twin was speaking with his sister, Jace would also occasionally jump in the conversation. In which, Y/n was happy that he did…in his way. 
Y/n actually had food on his plate that he was eating, his twin however, was just sitting there. Plus, Aemond was sitting sideways and only looking at his younger twin only, and he sat incredibly still; like a statue he was. Y/n ignored it as he continued to eat, and talking with his sister of course. This was only a matter of moments before the dinner went wrong.  
A cooked pig was placed down right in front of Aemond, Y/n gave him a side glance that basically told him “I know what you are thinking” from his eye. Aemond tipped his head downwards for a second as to almost not acknowledge it, but then he looked to the person across the table from him. 
Lucerys had a smile on his face, and in this case, well, it was almost enough to set Aemond off; he was just hiding it quite well. Aemond knew, he turned his head just enough to see Luke from across the table, and the moment he turned his nephew let out a laugh. 
Which, Aemond took immediate offense to. 
Slamming his fist down onto the table, loud enough that the entire room quieted down and looked at him. He reached for his goblet and stood up, his figure now probably towering over his nephews at this rate. The look in his remaining eye was dilated to some degree to make it show that he was wanting to go after his nephews for a while now. 
“A final tribute. To the health of my nephews. Jace. Luke. And Joffery.” He took a breath. 
Aegon and Y/n both saw this and raised their cups as well, Aegon just looked like he wanted something interesting to happen. Y/n was just wanting to have some fun, in the “beating someone for no reason” kind of way. 
“Each of them, handsome, wise…” Y/n looked to his twin, giving him the nod of approval. Aemond smirked slightly as he said the final word. 
“Strong.”
“Aemond.” Alicent said in a hurry, almost wanting him to stop. 
“Let us drain our cups, to these three strong boys.” Aemond turned to Jace, still holding his cup. Y/n also stood up, following in his twin’s steps.
“I dare you say that again.” Jace challenged.
“Why. Twas only a compliment. Do you not think yourself strong?” Aemond challenged back.
This is when things got heated. Aemond and Jace approached each other, Jace, when he was close enough to his uncle, punched him right in the face with his closed fist. But Aemond barely had a reaction to this. Luke on the other hand was pinned to the table by Aegon, Y/n watched from behind his twin as he was just amused from all of this. 
When Aemond recovered from his hit, he pushed Jace down to the ground with ease. Y/n then walked over and stood in front of his twin, as he saw their uncle Daemon moving closer to them. Y/n knew his twin had a weird fascination with their uncle, often in their youth he would find Aemond ranting to him on how he wanted to be just like him. But now, Y/n knew he could not underestimate Daemon as he was known as “The Rogue Prince” for a reason. 
Alicent pulled Aemond aside as she began to lecture him. Though, he pulled his arm away as he walked back to where he was.
“I was merely expressing how proud I was of my family, mother. Hmm. But it seems our nephews aren’t quite as proud of theirs.” Aemond stood next to Y/n, urging him to add in on it. And indeed he did. 
“It seems our nephews have much to learn. Being proud of their heritage may be a good start.” Y/n added, he just wanted to see what would happen.
Jace was about to pounce like an animal onto his uncles, but Daemon stepped in and that was enough to get him to back off. Daemon then turned to look at his two nephews who held his gaze with competition. Aemond spared his twin a glance before the two agreed indirectly and left the dining hall.
As they walked off, the younger of the two let out a laugh. In which, Aemond, of course heard clearly. “What is so funny.”
“You are becoming worse than me. One day, your temper and actions will get us in big trouble.” Y/n remarked.
“Then we shall see what the future may bring us when that happens, won’t we.”
“Aemond. By the hells, please don’t actually do something you’ll regret. I do not want to pick up the pieces.”
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onlyseokmins · 9 months ago
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$$60 billion (part 1) • l.s.m.
How did a legendary bounty promised for turning in the wasteland's most infamous outlaw transform into a sick, little inside betting joke amongst your traveling companions? Though you have no idea why they're doing it… you sure as hell don't want that very same gunslinger comrade worth sixty billion double dollars to know anything about it either — but oops — looks like he already does! Damn you and your temper, some unhelpful lip-loosening alcohol, and one no-good, sorry excuse of a preacher you sometimes think of as a friend.
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Pairing: outlaw!lee seokmin x fem!reader Genres: eventual smut (minors dni!), trigun!au action!au, apocalyptic/post-apocalyptic!au, space western!au, slight enemies to comrades to ??? !au, angst, fluff, they're dumbasses your honor 🙏 Warnings: swearing, blood, death, gore, guns, injuries, destruction, mentions of knives, weapons, violence, creepy monsters and creatures, ptsd, moral ambiguities, dark topics tbh, smoking, unsettling space western things, slight body horror and hints at altered dna, weird religious cults, mentions of eating/food, alcohol, threats, bets among friends, platonic (but not really) nakedness, reader is operating on a short fuse bc I believe u have to be built different for this universe, their communication is abt to be as poor as the plant life 💀 Seungcheol kinda his own warning imho, biggest apology to chan, and we all love seok sm bc he sings abt total slaughter 🙇🏻‍♀️ WC: 19.5k of 32.7k | Part 2 | Read on AO3 A/N: this is for the Now that's 90's - A Seventeen collab and loosely based off/inspired by the Trigun anime/manga! You do not need to know it as I manipulated a whole lot of elements for my own narrative but beware of various spoilers if you do go ahead and check out the series after reading!! I feel like the boys may seem ooc but I had a lot of fun putting this together 😌 Thank you Summer and Isa for hosting this collab and your utmost patience in me finally writing my piece! I hope everyone enjoys this and please check out the other writers in this amazing collab ❤️let me know your thoughts and feel free to ask any questions regarding this au's intricacies!!
Everyone wanted Lee Seokmin. 
The cities' great militaries. Bounty hunters. Bandits on the roads. Criminals escaping death row. Prowling pirate gangs. His twin brother. You. 
Though you reckoned your "want" for him was a bit… different from others. Well, at least you hope so, goddamn it. 
You shiver. 
At first, you wanted him just like the mass majority would one day as well — dead. The deed swiftly carried out with a silver pistol aimed at his temple.
Besides, your blood-thirst began before the destruction of July. Unlike most, who angrily shake their fists at the gaping crater on the fifth moon in the spirit of pure vengeance. Yes, the tragic incident of the great city that upped the bounty dangling over his head like a noose to a sixty billion double dollars reward. But Little Ivywood was the first of many places that would end up reduced to ruins after Lee Seokmin set foot there.
Wiped off the map. Wiped from history. Wiped from existence. But never forgotten. Especially not by the small town's only known survivor — you.
Your earliest memories contain little about the events that led up to being left on the doorstep of Little Ivywood's unofficial orphanage. How could they when you were just a baby? One swaddled in a ratty cloth weighted down by a rusted pistol. There was just one simple hint to your past — scribbled nearly illegible on a torn piece of paper dotted with blood — and could only be what the nuns had to assume was your name.
At least that's how Sister Meryl relayed the tale whenever asked, her hands clasped tightly together in praise and gratitude to the Saint that delivered you to them unharmed. The irony, considering Sister Lucia always looks like she'll faint just like the day she opened the convent's side door. It wasn't an easy sight to see or recall, the image of a wailing infant mouthing on the empty muzzle of a gun.
Neither versions of your origin story could be that far off thanks to the scar marring your left hand and the gun held tightly in your right. You've had both for as long as you can remember. And as you grew and changed, so did they.
The scar shrunk and faded through the years, seemingly forgotten amongst a myriad of other markings littered across your skin. Over time, the pistol's rusted parts were repaired or replaced and soon, its shine and character returned. Restored to its former glory while forging a new beginning ahead with a different owner.
But there were two things that stayed constant throughout your years at the orphanage. The first was your birth name. Not even the nuns, who generally loved bestowing scriptural monikers as if they were granting rich titles to unnamed orphans, tried to change yours. The second was a person who you still refuse to call by his baptismal name — Chan.
He helped you, became an assistant of sorts. Originally just some snot-nosed, beanpole of a fellow orphan you didn't really pay much attention to. A scared kid who cried way too loudly even after you'd even taken the time to demonstrate that the gun was safe after he'd been the one continuously pestering to see it. Very much to Sister Constance's chagrin, since it all went down in the middle of confessional time.
But curiosity eventually overturned the initial fear.
Lucky, because by acquiring bravery, Chan could discover his innate talent for gunsmithing. Lanky, noodle arms transformed into well-formed, sinewy muscles. The soft baby skin of his hands roughened with callouses as he whittled away near the convent's underground furnace. He'd spend hours down there, returning with sweat, grime, and charcoal smudged all over his skin after melting together the random metal objects found by digging beneath the basement's unfinished floor.
The Sisters disliked dirt and grime all over the children and tracked through the doors. But it was hard to keep clean out in the middle of a sandy desert. Complaints dwindled thanks to the fellow orphans who would stop their mischief to watch Chan work. And as time passed, his shoulders broadened further, his voice began to deepen, his dark hair grew longer, and those brown eyes started to sparkle with something different from simple, fleeting passion — it was a dream.
The excitable boy would tell you all about it under the stars. Late into the nights when you searched for what had to be remnants of Earthen materials from the Big Fall, he'd chatter on and on.
"Once we're actual adults," — free from the guardianship requirement provided from the orphanage — "we're gonna leave Lil Ivywood behind and explore the great wastelands of Gunsmoke!"
You snort at the ridiculousness of such an idea. "And how do you think we'll survive?"
"Easy-peasy, I'm gonna build a bunch of guns and we're gonna end up so rich. And famous!"
"Yeah, sure. Throw a couple double dollars at the worms, I'm sure they'll let us pass with no problem."
Not one to be deterred by your eternal sarcasm, Chan shakes his head."Nah, that's where you come in. Didn't think I'd let you freeload, right?"
He stands and stretches both of his arms straight out, the ones your roommate had started to gush over. Hands clasped together like Sister Meryl's always do before prayer time and then extending both pointer fingers into a mock handgun, out into the distant sand dunes one rarely dares to stray.
"You gotta be a sharpshooter to not let my hard work go to waste!"
You lazily take aim next to him, handling the freshly restored pistol with uncharacteristic gentleness. While it might officially be yours, it's also Chan's baby.
"Mm-hm, me and my killer skills."
And then you both dissolve into laughter.
It was such a pipe dream and yet; it didn't seem utterly impossible. There were little moments you let yourself imagine it, too — just until the suns peep their heads above the horizon. There was no way you could defend yourself — let alone another person — from the dangers of the desert or it would've been something you'd attempted years ago.
But when Chan spoke of his plans under the glow of the orbiting full moons, confidently mapping an adventure through an area he's never been to or seen before, and dreamed — he easily pulled you under his spell too. It was contagious, exciting, addicting, and most of all — it could really be… possible.
An armory of grade-A weapons. The bank account overflowing with double dollars. Endless boxes of bullets and the refined skills to shoot them; you were the force to be reckoned with and a protector of those who couldn't do it for themselves.
"Do you think… we could really succeed?" you ask one night, running a finger along the familiar engravings on your gun's grip panel.
Chan's grin was as shiny as the circular metal shell he was carving into. You refuse to look his way because of how infectious it could be. Plus, the main reason it was so stinking bright was due to this being the first time you verbally entertained his ideas.
"Oh-ho-ho, doubt my capabilities?"
"Obviously."
If offended — he was not — by the instant agreement, there was no sign of it. Instead, he focused back onto his handicraft, knowing you would eventually spill your true thoughts if he was patient.
There was no rush tonight after all. A star-filled expanse of black blanketed across the sky — one he hoped would never change to blue.
"More like… it's just going to be so risky!"
"And that's why you'll be the —"
"But I've never even held a gun before!" You spot Chan pointedly direct the corner of his gaze to where your hands rest, causing you to flinch them away from the weapon and wave around haphazardly as your cheeks heat. "I mean, like, to shoot! Sister Lucia always says it'd be too dangerous."
"Sister Lucia thinks water that doesn't flow directly out of the holy grail is dangerous."
"Technically, that's true."
"Oh god, she's got you thinkin' the same, too!"
"But she'd probably rather swear by the Saint than ever let me get any bullets…" The thought alone of the devout nun saying the Savior's name in vain makes both of you smirk but yours falls just as quick as it came. "And we're going to need those if we ever want to leave Little Ivywood."
"Well —"
"And I… I'd have to kill things! People, too. I don't know if I can do that, I —"
" — Think fast!"
It's his turn to interrupt, chipper voice ever optimistic as he tosses the finished trinket your way. Thankfully, your reflexes work fast enough to catch it nimbly in time. The oval is hot to the touch after hovering over searing flames and despite its small size, weighs down your right palm as you glance over its etchings.
Satisfied, Chan takes that as his cue to walk toward the nook that shields you from the roaring heat of the furnace. Squatting down so he's eye-level with your knees, he brushes back his tangled mess of hair with one hand and taps knowingly at the barrel of the pistol with the other.
"There's no reason to kill anyone or anything."
"But this can hurt people… I could hurt people."
"You've had this ever since you were a baby and never harmed anyone with it."
"It's… it's never been loaded or…"
"Doesn't need to be. If you smacked someone with it, they'd surely feel that hit." He snickers, tone bordering on the edge of cockiness. "I would know, considering the sturdy and valuable materials used for repairs."
You roll your eyes and mutter, "Show-off," but it lacks true malice behind it.
"And even so," Chan takes one of his hands and pats the back of your free one, unintentionally right over the spot where your scar lies. "You've hurt no one before. Not even me, who annoys you the most!"
"About time you finally realized how merciful I am."
He says your name in earnest, remaining uncharacteristically serious and lays your intertwined hands on top of the gun before squeezing tightly. "Both this and you don't have to kill a single thing or person — ever — if that's not what you want to do. You can aim for non-vital points, shoot up in the air… Bullets or no bullets, just the sight of a weapon alone can be enough of a deterrent for most."
Chewing hesitantly on your lower lip, you let his words sink in and he continues.
"The fact you're aware of the hundreds of risks when handling a weapon like this means you'll be even more cautious when using it. I trust you, so trust in yourself."
Warmth spreads from your interlocked hands and through your entire body like you're wrapped in another one of his sweet hugs, culminating into tears threatening to spill past your lash line. Chan believed in you and though you'd never admit it aloud, it meant the world to you.
"When did you grow up so much?" you tease, letting out an exhale you didn't realize was being held.
"Aw, c'mon! I've been taller than you for months now!"
"Keep dreamin' if it makes you feel better."
Though Chan sasses back by sticking his tongue out, he lets you ruffle his sweaty bangs despite receiving a slightly bruised forehead in return because you forget about the new gift in your hand. Plotting an escape, he stands and pulls you up with him, joined by your clasped hands.
"We should probably head back. Sister Constance's likely gonna ask us to check the Plant before morning mass and you don't want her to catch you dozing off again."
"Last I recall, you were the one she caught napping!"
"But you have the most demerits this week."
"And whose fault is that?!"
Quick as lightning, he nudges you with enough strength to catch you off guard and destabilize your balance. Then he tears away, calling over his shoulder, "Snooze and ya lose!"
"Ugh, this is exactly why — you never play fair!"
Regathering your bearings at record speed, you dash right after Chan. The boy's raucous laughter echoes in your own lungs and you swear the stars twinkle brighter in the nighttime sky. You overtake him right before reaching the convent's door — the same one you were left on — and clutch at his arm before he can reach past to open it.
"Hey… thanks."
He grins all goofy. Chan's well aware you mean much more than that, but he opts to flick your forehead rather than give you grief over it. "Yeah, yeah. I do so much for you, you know?"
"Mm-hm."
"So it's about time to finally pick a name I can carve onto that bad boy. If you don't, I'll put mine there." He nods to your gun excitedly, then points to the oval. "Oh, and I'll make a chain for that soon. Did you decide what you'll put inside?"
"Questions, questions, demands, demands." You wave him off and open the door with a yawn. "I'll think of one. And yeah, you know that Earthen gadget we found? Gonna cut out those papers and put them in there before sleeping."
Once while digging for materials, you had stumbled across a square object that wasn't completely destroyed, unlike many others. After a few experiments of messing with the random knobs and buttons, you determined it could mimic whatever was directly in front of the clear coated lenses. And later — much to your amusement and amazement — it printed out the image on thick, shiny squares.
Fascinating little things those Earthlings created!
You'd luckily put the last few sheets left in the machine to good use. Experimenting with the surrounding scenery that blurrily featured some of Ivywood's buildings, then one of Chan, and finally wrangled a frame that captured both of you together.
"Do you think you'll be able to stabilize it?"
Your tentative question makes him look toward the large, bulbous structure that houses the Plant. The power source Little Ivywood depended upon.
He sports a cheery grin. "Won't know 'til I've tried!"
"Ever considered too much confidence might be a bad thing?"
"If you're jealous, just say so. But with you by my side, there's nothing we can't accomplish together!" He bounces excitedly on his heels. "Besides, I forgot to mention…" Beckoning you with a hand to come closer, you lean in, curious. "I've become quite the master at bargaining. There won't be a single worm who'll refuse a double dollar from the great Chan!"
"What did you do?"
"What haven't I done?"
"You're the worst. Like to ever exist."
"The absolute best, you mean 'cause there'll be no reason for you to waste any bullets or fear cutting a single lifespan short!"
"Goodnight, Chan."
"You mean 'thank you so much, what would I ever do without you, Chan!' but whatever! You can make it up to me tomorrow!"
But tomorrow never came.
Or rather — daybreak arrived in the unrecognizable form of rapid gunfire and screams of terror. The buildings rattled, trembled, and shook from the onslaught just like the people cowering in fear within them.
The dust stirred up in the chapel's hall after a wall unexpectedly collapsed causes you to cough. Amidst the chaos and panic, you spare a glance over your shoulder to see Sister Meryl, who strides confidently to the altar.
She stands with poise and purpose in front of the marbled stone. Steadfast and unwavering in strength because of her faith alone, even as the grand statue of the Saint starts crumbling down with the ceiling tiles falling around it.
It's a visual you're not likely to forget, carved deep into your memory before you flee with the rest. Sister Lucia is flustered as usual, ushering everyone as fast as she can near the grand oak doors that lead out to where additional shouting can be heard and only more pandemonium must await outside.
You're struck with the damning realization.
The gods — they have completely abandoned humankind.
"That would be ten demerits any other day," Sister Constance voice abruptly snaps, "fortunately for you, now is not the time for such things."
It's astonishing how even at this moment, the nun remains on high alert for 'troublemakers'. Her sharp-nailed fingers latch around your wrist as she breezes by — much too similar to when you've been dragged off to detention. And as if that's what's happening, your heels plant firmly in the ground and obstinately tug her back a step.
"What about Sister Meryl? We can't just leave!"
"If you knew what was good for you, you'll obediently obey me. But if you knew that, you'd recognize faithfulness will guide her and the rest of us to safety."
"Nothing guarantees —"
"Those who do not devote themselves truthfully will never understand. Should the Saint deem Sister Meryl's sacrifice to be in vain, then she has failed not only the Holy Bishop and our sacred bonds, but you — one she unnecessarily dotes on — as well."
You want to argue and protest as Sister Constance yanks you forward. But the faint tremors you feel despite the tight grip of her hand and the tensed jawline of the woman whose stoic face is normally unbreakable makes you pause.
She's shaken. She's unsure. She's wavering.
Sister Constance doubts.
And something about that thrills you. Terrifyingly so.
The shock of it all is as startling as the pale sunlight blinding your eyes when the chapel's heavy doors finally get thrown open. Grains of sand swirl through Little Ivywood, diluting the usual brightness of the glowing orbs in the sky and their powerful rays.
A sandstorm brews on the horizon.
That's the least of your worries, though. Blood stains the soil where shrapnel grazed tender flesh. Fellow orphans scream and cry out from their wounds as they struggle to get away from the captors attempting to drag them to the center of town.
With a chill, you alarmingly realize who they're trying to escape from. Women in black and white robes don a wild, crazed look on their faces. The ones who have raised and cared for parentless children throughout many years and tended to every need they could within their means.
The Blessed and Holy Sisterhood of Little Ivywood.
Sister Constance turns and you jump. Both at the horrors of the present and a reminder of how many times a quick movement of hers led to the sharp pain of a switch or ruler tearing into skin. An eerie sound of laughter rings out and your blood runs cold, eyes darting left and right for the source.
And then through the dust particles, looms the sinister silhouette of a figure in a long trench coat flapping in the wind. Spiked hair sticks straight up, retaining its menacing style despite the powerful wind gusts and emphasizing an already impressive height. You gulp, swearing there's a flash of metal followed by a fanged smirk that glints dangerously as Sister Constance tugs you closer to the terrifying shadow beast shrouded by sand swirling in the air.
A declaration of your given name — stern and cold. "Know that your purpose is being fulfilled, that you are serving the great —"
And then comes a shout of your name, this time from someone desperate and panicked. You're yanked forward and then suddenly catapulted backward, grunting at the impact of your body slamming against someone else's.
"You need to go! You need to get out of here!"
"Chan?!"
He clings to you, shifting so his back is to the nun only a few paces past the corner he dashed around for safety and to stall for time. Throwing a cautious look over his shoulder before whispering urgently, "Go! And don't look back!"
"What about you?"
"Don't mind me." The smooth leather of a satchel presses against your palm. "Get movin'!"
"But —"
"Seriously," the boy shoves you forward with a not-so-gentle push. You gape at the audacity and he waves his hand, like he's shooing away a pesky flying worm. Rude. "Please! I'll be right behind you but —"
An eruption of nearby gunfire and a series of high-pitched shing!-like noises interrupt him. He glances again over his shoulder. You cautiously step forward and his head whips back to let out a hiss.
"Chan, what's —"
"Need to grab a few more things, see if any other idiots need help. Just… just get out of town, wait for me by the rocks if it'll make you feel better." He smiles, though it doesn't make those brown eyes of his sparkle like usual. "It'll… it'll all be okay."
You're uncertain and scared. But something about Chan's speaking powers have always made you believe in the impossible. So, you nod resolutely while taking the bag from him and warn, "Promise you'll be safe."
"You hate those kinds of things."
It's true. To you, promises were only made to be broken. And yet…
"… And somehow you've changed my mind before."
The bangs of carnage draw closer. Louder.
"Fine, just go. Please! And don't look back!"
Acquiescing to his pleas, you sprint toward where he pointed. Sitting like giant sentinels lays an outcrop of boulders bordering the western edge of Little Ivywood. The desert is only two paces away, expanding outward into a desolate plain filled with the undulating slopes of dunes. Picking a sizable rock to hide behind, you keep watch for Chan, cringing at the distant sound of gunshots still rapidly being fired.
What was that? What did you see? And what did you almost get dragged into?
What was going on?
Boom!
It's an ear-shattering noise that causes even the great stones around you to tremble from the explosion. A flare of light so bright leaves you no choice but to look away to protect your eyes, ducking behind the rocks as a shield.
When you recover after it dissipates to see what just happened — Little Ivywood is no more.
It's gone.
"No…"
The tiny town reduced to only rubble and ash. What once were rows of square buildings stacked on top of each other to divert the view of a relatively flat lay of the land are now parallel to its surroundings.
"No… no… no…"
Gone.
You don't think twice about running toward the wreckage. Chan is there. Chan has to be there!
"No!"
And most importantly, he has to be alright.
Broken piles of the shoddy architecture littering the landscape prevents you from traversing too far. Bile rises in your throat as you desperately scan for a sign — any sign — for Chan. For survivors. For anyone. Even the air is still, no longer rippling with irritable heat waves and heavy gusts of wind because the blast was strong enough to ward off nature itself and the incoming sandstorm.
For now.
And during the futile search, that's when you spot him. On his knees with his back to you, slouched over in the only clear space amidst the destruction. The tattered fabric of a cerise garment hangs off the man's broad shoulders and pools around his body like a puddle of blood. Reddish-brown bangs tinged with black hang limply as his chin curls further and further into his chest.
I don't understand, you vent to yourself after a couple ungraceful vaults and stumbling through the debris to get closer. This bastard got what he wanted, did what he wanted, and won! So, why is he acting like that? Who destroyed his town? His people?
Finally, you're a couple steps behind him. Thankful, at the very least, for whatever weird state this man is in because it grants you the opportunity to approach and press the cold steel of your pistol to the side of his temple.
"Don't. Move."
You hope it comes out as the threatening command you intend it to be. There's a tense beat of silence as you wait for his next move until you realize he's doing exactly what you demanded.
Then he chuckles. A choked out, watery sort of sound. Your hands start shaking even as they press the barrel harsher against his head.
"Go ahead and shoot."
"Answer me first." Your voice becomes as unsteady as the quakes in your body and you rasp out, "Why… why'd you do it?"
His head lifts and you flinch, but he takes no further action besides staring blankly ahead at the ruins. "I wish I could tell you but… I've been asking myself the same question."
"I — you…! You wreak hell and havoc upon a whole innocent town and… and you don't even know why?!"
"Pathetic, isn't it?" The man laughs again, without a shred of humor. A gloved hand reaches up to wrap around the weapon and you momentarily falter at the force of him leaning into it. The weight pushing it closer into his skull seems hard enough to leave a nasty imprint, as if that should be a main concern right now. "I'd simply like to know how I did it."
"I —"
"Not loaded," he sighs and drops his hand, twisting around to actually get a proper look at whoever was holding him at gunpoint.
You're taken aback by the intensity of death radiating in those dark brown irises that casually observe you through amber-colored, cracked lenses. Your arms fall down, dumbfounded at the stranger's unflinching behavior, the pistol bumping into your thigh. He lets out a "tsk" and then pulls something out of his pocket.
In his opposite palm, clad in a fingerless glove unlike the left, rests a conical golden object. Though you've never seen one in real life before, you think you know what it is. The shape matches the hollow outlines when Chan disassembled the chambers of your gun.
"A cartridge," he says and you blink. "A bullet," he clarifies upon noticing your confusion. Then the man smiles encouragingly. "Go on. Take it."
You're incredulous. "You're okay with handing that over to me?"
"It's what you want, right?" There's a wistful look on his face. "This place… it was your home."
"No," you're quick to refute, shocked at such an automatic response. Then admitting, "I don't even know what a home is."
Innocent town, my ass, is what you derisively admit inward and snort at yourself.
The convent itself was far from comforting. The other orphans with their bright grins when Saint Meryl sang lullabies on the nights you couldn't sleep — those were the kinds of things that made it bearable.
Guilt.
"I — I —"
It overwhelms your senses. Rattling up your entire nervous system and settling a cruel, cruel weight in your chest. You hunch over, chest heaving, and throat burning. There's a thump as your gun falls to the ground, its silvery sharp edges becoming distorted, warped, and blurred through a film of unshed tears in your widened eyes.
"Should've… It should've —"
"Hey, hey…"
"It should've been me!"
The man rises to his full height, brushing off his clothes before crouching down. A sturdy hand grips your shoulder and dutifully encourages your gasping upper body into an upright position. Gently, ever so fragile, he bops your forehead with his and you subconsciously lean against the unexpected support.
He's near enough to ground you to something solid. But distant enough for two strangers whose first meeting is one amidst a crumbling town's travesty. With his close presence comes the scent of gun smoke, though not as bitterly pungent and putrid as you recall from before. It's subtle and smokey, reminiscent of the fire that Chan once proudly stoked in his makeshift forge.
Your body shakes as the tears finally slip free.
"All lives are equally precious, one shouldn't be sacrificed for another."
"… How can… how can you say that so… easily?"
The death-come-over look in his eyes changes to something faraway. Like he's seeing something beyond the destruction surrounding both of you. Those amber lenses don't have to be cracked to draw attention to the fracturing despair radiating behind them.
Then, he shakes his head and shrugs. "Because you should live even when those dear to you are gone. This world is made of love and peace, after all."
Your crying abruptly pauses with the natural effort it takes to let out a scoff. Ignoring your utter scorn and disbelief, the man's gaze drifts to the pistol still on the ground. The tip of a steel-toed boot kicks it up into the air with a flourish, single-handedly catching it to inspect the weapon with practiced ease.
"Live because there's a reason you survived, even if you loathe every second of it. You'll feel like you don't deserve it. But persevere because you should. Because that's what they would've wanted and you keep them alive by living yourself. A burden? Maybe. Why spend such a cursed blessing only dwelling in regret when you can do so much more?"
He offers the gun back, its handle extended in your direction.
"If nothing else, live for yourself most importantly. Help show the world the love and peace it deserves. Even if it couldn't afford to gift it to you. That's what life is all about. The ticket to the future is always blank!" Pausing, he shrugs with a regret-filled smile on his face. "At least that's what I was taught… and what I think."
"… Awfully full of optimism for some dude who wiped out a full town and doesn't even know why."
"Name's Seokmin," he returns, now sporting a cheeky grin as you cautiously reach out for the pistol. Only to be outsmarted with a literal 'sleight-of-hand' and meeting the warmth of fingers and a gloved palm instead of the expectation of hard, cold, and familiar steel.
"Huh?"
"Lee Seokmin, to be precise! And it's a pleasure to meet 'cha! Erm, despite the… terrible circumstances." Seokmin jiggles the gun in front of you with his other hand, almost taunting you to reach for it again.
You don't.
"And what do you call this lovely lady?"
"Nothing."
"A shame. But not everyone cares to name things, 'specially if they don't hold any value." He finally tosses it back and you barely manage to catch it in time with a scowl.
"Just haven't decided."
"I see! Mine's Geranium."
"Oh, like… the flower?"
He visibly perks up at that even further, a radiant smile showcasing two pointy fangs. "You've heard of it?"
"Well," you scratch your cheek, "the, uh, sisters gave a girl that name because of her hair."
There's an uncomfortable pause as the dreadful realization you'll never see those brilliant ruby locks bounce because of her excitement again settles back into your stomach. You swallow, eyes roaming the stranger in front of you for a distraction.
"Um… you must really like the color… red."
Seokmin glances down at the tatters of his scarlet clothes and shrugs. "I guess. Though the one I saw was red, I've heard they come in different colors."
"You've seen a plant? Like a plant plant? A real one! You know — that grows out of the ground and transforms and all that? It doesn't, well…"
Vegetation was a rarely discussed concept. The only thing you knew came out of the poorly written history books in the dusty library's darkest corner. In the desert outskirts, you had a better chance of finding ancient Earth technology that might still be intact to share its plethora of knowledge about the old world humans left behind than hope to find whatever resources the big cities had access to.
"Mm, yeah, a long time ago. But say," he jovially waves the cartridge from before and it glints in the setting rays of the suns. "Would you care to hear this man's story before shooting him?"
And of course, you listened. What other choice did you have, you who lost everything at once? But even back then, something small and precious was planted in the barren depths of your heart. That was just the beginning. It would continue to grow, watered and tended to under the sunny smile of Lee Seokmin — the destroyer of cities and a very wanted man across the planet.
You leave that tiny bit out during the recitation of your past to the inquisitive pastor. Though something you'll regrettably find out later is he's already got you all figured out.
Bastard.
"… So, that's how I met the infamous Lee Seokmin and didn't end up killing him," you declare with a flourish and take a satisfied gulp of cheap beer picked up from some abandoned mart along the way out of Little Jersey.
Draining another bottle dry, you toss away the metal cap, close one eye, and peer through the narrow bottleneck like it's a telescope — albeit a very poor one.
Through the distorted glass stretch endless sand dunes as far as the eye can see. Stars glitter and sparkle amid the glow of the full moons in orbit, temporarily dimmed by a puff of the roguish's man's cigarette that wafts through the inky darkness.
You wonder if he'd be willing to share one.
"A shame," Seungcheol grumbles and offers a white stick from his pocket.
You take it eagerly only to see it's nothing but — a lollipop. The hard candy's become a strange gooey consistency thanks to melting in the desert heat all day and partially re-solidifying during the nighttime's chilly air.
It's stale too.
Fucker.
You let out a disdainful sniff but nod in agreement to his statement. "It is. But he promised me something. Then his bounty increased from a meager six million to sixty billion double dollars after destroying July, putting a hole in the moon, and all that. So… following him around has paid off."
"I guess," he shrugs, "guess I don't really care 'bout yer lil meet-cute story."
You gape at the audacity. "You're the one who fuckin' asked!"
"Well… figured we could bond, ya know? Orphans 'n all that cozy, feel-good shit."
"You know, not a single thing I've said thus far coud be classified as 'cute'."
"Uh-huh."
"And I never took you to be a sentimental fool."
"Hey, now —"
You hold up a hand. "'Thou shall not bear false witness'."
"As if ya even know what that means," Seungcheol retorts and flicks the ashy cigarette stub in your direction, the cross around his neck ironically reflecting in the moonlight. "Was gonna say, if anythin', I put the mental in sentimental, sweet'art."
Well, you certainly wouldn't argue with that point. "…What I do know is that you're doing this all. For him."
"'Ol Needle Noggin, eh?"
"Well… yeah. But he's only part of a bigger picture for you."
"… 'S none o' yer business, ya know? Best to know less."
Your eyes roll. "Sure. That's why you nearly got hit by our car 'cause you wore a suit into the desert and didn't bring a drop of water. All while hauling that stupid, big-ass cross around! And then you insist on joining us — try to scam us! — but hey," you put your hands up, "none of my business."
"Wasn't tryna scam —"
"Hella shady, man... Hella. fuckin'. shady." You're shocked you can see the man's eyes roll in a begrudging defeat behind his black sunglasses — at night, no less — but you nudge him. "C'mon, just tell me! I bet it has to do with Hopeland, something… or someone back at that orphanage."
"Anyone told ya how irritatin' ya are?"
"Only the ones that are equally just as annoying!"
"Tch, woman." Seungcheol messes up the back of his black hair, mouth opening as he cracks his jaw. There's a pregnant pause. "… 'Han was… he was different. Ya wouldn't get it."
"Try me. Evidently you weren't listening very well, were you?" No surprise there. You retrieve the locket that takes refuge beneath your top, a familiar oval swinging from its long chain between the two of you. "Believe it or not, I do get it."
His eyes fixate on it like a pendulum, darting to your face, and then up to the sky. A crooked smile quirks up the corner of his mouth and he lets out a resigned sigh. "Ya really love 'im, don'tcha?"
You feel a funny sensation.
Akin to getting caught in a horde of flying worms and trying to squash down as many as you can. Your answer is hushed and Seungcheol snickers. Unbeknownst to the two of you that an additional pair of ears — assumed to be asleep — also catches your whispered reply.
"So, how much ya gonna pay for confessin'?" the pastor goads and lets out a startled yelp when you try to smash the hand-held bank he totes around that's shaped like a cathedral.
"Oh, go to hell, Choi!"
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"Stare any longer and you'll no longer be needin' Sirocco." An amused snicker follows the relaxed drawl. "Bullets're 'bout to start flyin' outta those eyes 'stead of that gun o' yers."
You scowl at the dumb man seated next to you. "It's not like subtlety has ever been a strong suit of yours. But could you at least pay better attention to your surroundings?" A meager amount of golden liquid sloshes against the sides of the glass you pointedly wave around. "Or are you already too drunk to forget where we are?"
"Ain't no lightweight," Seungcheol brags with his fourth pint of the night in hand and a rapacious grin cockily tilting the empty lollipop stick in the corner of his mouth upward. "Can't say the same for the rest, though. Whiskey's stronger than a punch to the gut."
"… You would know. I'm sure it might just taste like water to some by now."
While it might initially elate most visitors to order as many rounds of the only available beverage on the menu as possible, the reality of the situation was much more grim. As if he can read your mind, the man clad in black, gray, and muted silvers flippantly reminds you of why your so-called merry band of travelers are even here.
"Needle Noggin said 'e fixed the Plant up just fine 'n dandy, so here's hopin' we get some clean bathwater t'night."
At those words, your gaze instinctively shoots back to where it focused earlier. Seungcheol snorts and drains his glass with a satisfactory sigh before poking more fun at you.
"Gonna put a hole through his head at this point."
"Not like that's anything new."
"Yeah, but rather than constantly laserin' holes through his skull, ya should be tryna convince him to fill yers up, instead. 'N not referrin' to that empty space behind yer forehead."
"I know exactly what you mean, you perverted freak."
That cracks Seungcheol up. "'N here I was thinkin' ya was gonna end up a nun servin' the Eye of Joshua!"
By now, you're well-accustomed to the hedonistic ways of the man who still keeps a leather band with a cross on it strapped across his Adam's apple, sewn into the cuffs of his black suit, and carries the hulking shape of one on his weary shoulders.
Unfazed, you fire back, "If they even let someone like you into the blessed and holy ranks, then any whore off the streets would be welcome to join."
It's a series of light-hearted jabs you both take in stride. The truth is much darker and deeper, but tonight serves as a tiny snapshot away from the normal weariness of day-to-day survival in Gunsmoke. Right now, you celebrate alongside the residents of Tonim what peace could really look like in the future.
Except you're on edge.
For a reason that's silly compared to the usual adrenaline rush of tracking down Plants nearing red status and defending the area, all the while trying to prevent the inevitable destruction and chaos to follow. Still, it's why you beckon the bartender over for another refill as a positively "tickled-pink" Seungcheol not-so-silently judges.
"Now who's staring?"
"'Kay, but's not with unbridled lust and — " He's cut off by a sharp kick to the side of his shin delivered by one of your heavy combat boots. "And feelin's," gets wheezed out before the pastor falls silent at your nasty scowl paired with Wonwoo's timely arrival.
The saloon owner and de facto authority in town approaches the two of you cautiously. It's no secret who you are, who you're with. What you do and the things that follow when you do what you do. And yet what you've done has saved the town and given its people — especially the younger folk — something that some of them have never experienced before.
Hope.
And that seems to be good enough proof for Wonwoo. Rumors may just be rumors, after all. None of you are like the reports relayed in a tinny voice through the virtually enhanced radios that are non-plant-powered — aka illustriously dubbed by their inventor as VERnons.
"… the Bloody Rain… follows… Lee… Humanoid Typhoon… armed… dangerous. Punisher… cross… machine gun… two unknown… likely… agents…. Bernardelli Insurance…"
The VERnon sitting behind the counter splutters out bits and pieces of information. He side-eyes the device awkwardly and starts fumbling with the buttons, trying to mumble over the static and monotonous voice.
"Can I pour you another drink?"
"Sure," you chuckle, pleased.
The bartender's well-intentioned efforts are fruitless which is to be expected. Only the creator, and those he personally taught, could truly modify the invention as pleased. A part of you hoped to find evidence Hansol had traveled this far but alas, he was probably still searching through the seven major cities for his beloved Milly before attempting to wander through the treacherous wastelands.
A brown, short-haired darling sneaks awe-filled glances at the two of you from the corner where a group of women around your age gather to chat. Seungcheol's the first to catch onto the admiring starry-eyed gaze and winks. Chuckling when a pudgy hand clings tighter to one of the lady's long skirt, using the fabric as a demure little shield against his effortless charisma.
You catch the tail-end of the interaction with the ghost of a smile. If there's one thing that can definitely soften Seungcheol's rough edges, it's children. You can't blame him, reminded of cheery voices and energetic footsteps pounding after your own through the convent's hallways.
The attractive woman wonders what's drawing the younger girl's attention and leans down to whisper in her ear. Gesturing in your direction, you watch as she nods encouragingly and offers a gentle smile, pushing the tiny brunette forward who readily toddles over. The gaps still waiting for pearly white teeth to grow in that shy smile on the little girl's face are endearingly winsome.
"'Lo, Wonu."
The bespectacled man starts, eyes wide as he peers over the counter and just manages to glimpse the top of her mousy brown tufts. "Is that you, Lina? You're not supposed to be here."
"Past yer bedtime, lil one?"
She huffs indignantly at the two men, hands on her hips. "I've once stayed up 'til four in the morning, mister!"
"Oh, Lina…"
"Besides, how can anyone of good standing sleep properly when there's heroes in town?"
"Huh, what a darlin' angel!"
You scoff at your comrade's words. "As if you've ever seen one."
"I do beg your pardon," Wonwoo scrambles to excuse the child's enthusiasm. "Looks like another talk is due with, uh, Sheryl."
"You're just jealous, Wonu. Sherry says they're heroes."
A chubby finger points at you and Seungcheol and the bartender clicks his tongue — partially in reproach and the other half out of embarrassment. The two of you hardly pay any attention to his reaction, seeming to not mind her boldness at all.
"That's right, sweet'art. And don'tchu forget now." In fact, a certain cross-wearing man revels in it. He rummages deep in his pocket and pulls out a lollipop with a flourish. "'N here's a lil magic gift for ya, princess."
You're one step faster, snatching it and unwrapping the candy with a quick inspection. At least it looks fresh and clean. Seungcheol snorts. Ignoring him, you crouch down and hand it to Lina with a gentle smile.
"Remember to be careful with what you take from strangers."
"I know! But you're heroes… and heroes are always good people! You would never hurt me!" Those blue-green eyes are certainly dazzling as she stares into yours, reminiscent of the clean water now filling the town's reservoir. "You're very pretty."
"That might be the highest compliment I've ever received."
"Pretty people don't hurt anyone either! Sherry's super pretty and she's the gentlest I know!"
A very pretty pastor himself snickers for multiple reasons. Meanwhile, Wonwoo laments with a tired sigh, "Dunno what that crazy woman's been teaching her, I swear…"
"You're not supposed to talk about people you like like that, Wonu!" Lina gives them both the stink eye but returns her attention to focus solely on you — Tonim's loveliest savior in her teal-eyed view. "Will I grow up to be as pretty as you?"
Ah, how your heart aches.
"Even prettier."
"I…" She gnaws on her lip, as if it does anything to hide how much her pleased grin glows. "I wanna be a hero, too!"
"Don't see why you wouldn't become one." To you, she already is — in all her innocent radiance and glory.
"Gotta grow big 'n strong first, missy."
"I am strong!"
"Don't doubt it. But wait 'til yer at least twice my age 'fore ya go swingin' at thugs."
She wrinkles her nose. "I'll be in the grave like Grammy if I wait that long, old man!"
Seungcheol guffaws at her unexpected remark and you hear the bartender beg, "Lina, please!" But you focus on all the brilliance in front of you — from precious unkempt locks to blue eyes full of fire and finally to the worn out, dust-covered shoes.
"Hopefully you'll never need a reason to be the hero, though. It's our duty to keep that from happening."
There's too much hidden meaning and brutal experience in your words for her to fully understand. The lull gives a certain pastor an opportunity to sidle back into the conversation, ready to get up to no good as always.
"Ya wanna meet the hero of all heroes, darlin'?"
"Choi —"
"Yeah!" Lina claps ecstatically.
"Go 'head 'n give 'er yer second key," he coaxes quietly with a shit-eating smirk.
"I swear!"
"C'mon… never like keepin' such a sweet gal waitin'!"
After a minute's hesitation, you begrudgingly agree and take it out.
"Thank ya. Now, got a lil mission for ya, Miss Hero-in-the-Makin'."
"Really?!"
Barely able to conceal her exuberance, she reverently takes the key like it's actual gold and not simply plated. Seungcheol ruffles her hair affectionately.
"Y'see the man in all purple?"
"Mhm, yeah! The one that looks like the night sky?"
"Yeah, give 'im it. Make sure to say it's from this pretty lady."
"Choi!"
"Talk to 'im too 'cause he'll love that. He's a real hero, y'know? Truest of 'em all."
"Yes, sir!"
"Attagirl."
Lina scurries off and you turn back to the counter with a sour glare directed at Seungcheol. "What was that all about?"
"Dunno, cute?"
"I'm really sorry about that all," Wonwoo apologetically interrupts with the offer of another refill which is readily accepted. "She… she's very excitable."
"No need for apologizin', man."
"Yeah, she's adorable. Is she yours?"
The bespectacled bartender stutters, almost dropping the glass he's handing to you. "That's, uh, that's my sister!"
"Ah, makes sense! Didn't mean to assume."
He flushes and turns away. But not without mumbling something about it being okay and your comrade groans.
"Reminder — ya get too drunk, 'm not dealin' with ya ass."
"Great, I don't want you near my ass."
"'S not what I meant!"
"Yeah, yeah."
Seungcheol downs another shot and you're quick to follow his lead once Wonwoo hands over another refill per your shared request. However, this time, the stoic man surprisingly lingers and awkwardly fiddles with his wire-rimmed frames, doing his very best to not let his eyes wander your scantily clad figure as your head tilts back to swallow the burning alcohol.
Meanwhile, the pastor's grin turns wolfish.
"So, uh, who are you, really?"
"Curious, eh?" You lean comfortably onto the counter, braced by your forearms and an alluring smile on your face for the handsome saloon owner. His gaze drifts down to your scar-covered hands which also happen to be placed conveniently underneath your breasts.
You'd once said the best disguise and toughest armor was none at all. And why not flaunt your assets — literally — and put them to good use. The desert is hot anyways!
Seungcheol and Seungkwan both called bullshit. Mingyu applauded you and waved his "I respect women's rights, wrongs, and all the above no matter what!" flag. Seokmin — already used to your behavior and attire — had nothing else to say other than his normal quips of, "As long as you're comfortable".
"Well, a-a beautiful woman like yourself has to have everyone wondering."
And you laughed in the face of your haters every time it worked.
"Just a bounty hunter."
Wonwoo nods at the casual answer, recalling the holster strapped around the plush of your thigh beneath short denim shorts. "Where from?"
"Well… around. My hometown was destroyed so…"
"Oh? Same here."
"Ah, camaraderie." You jab a thumb menacingly in the direction of the purple-cloaked figure and the life of tonight's celebration, currently animatedly chattering to Lina. "That's why I'm turning him in."
"He's…?"
"Yup, Lee Seokmin. Yes," you confirm with a smirk at the way Wonwoo's eyes bug out behind his glasses, "that one — the infamous humanoid typhoon. Don't worry, he won't hurt anything or anyone here."
"He's… uh, he's not quite what I expected."
"Yeah, tell me about it."
"You must be pretty badass to reign him in. Heard he's giving what's left of the July regime officers a run for their double dollars."
"For sure. But it's thanks to the other two drunkards, really. Believe it or not, they're Bernardelli insurance agents. Raven-haired one's Seungkwan and the tall one is Mingyu. They're helping to monitor that whopping bounty of mine and prevent any more disasters from happening. Heard I might get a bump in value if I bring him in alive."
"Oh, well, it looks like it's working. And he seems… willing? To come with you?"
"The irony. Always been quite blasé about facing his doom."
"He's really a Plant engineer, too?"
"Of sorts," you huff at his visible confusion but wave your empty glass. "Can I get another?"
He's more than happy to accommodate and returns with two, sliding one over to Seungcheol with a cautious look at the person who seems the closest to you. "And this is…?"
"Pastor. Pleased to meet'cha."
"Oh! Really?"
"A surprising addition to the mix, yeah. But everyone needs to, like, pray sometimes." And under your breath, low enough so only a certain man can hear, "no matter how sketchy they are."
"Do you, hm, officiate weddings?"
The one in question quirks a thick eyebrow. "Ya lookin' to get hitched, boy?"
"M-maybe."
And Seungcheol feels wholly compelled to bless him silently from the bottom of his blackened heart with full sincerity, seeing as how the bespectacled man timidly peeks your way before his gaze darts elsewhere. "Sorry lad, charge 'bout a thousand double dollars minimum."
While the solitary bartender crashes back into the sad reality of capitalism, you jab your elbow into the pastor's ribcage. "Fuckin' scammer."
"Only the best of the best! Ya know, sixty billion's still on the table — 'n it better be callin' my name."
"No one even has sixty billion double dollars!"
"We have 'im." And he points back to where hoots and hollers erupt from the center table of the saloon.
Lina's returned to the woman she was with earlier — presumably her beloved Sherry — but that doesn't mean Seokmin's alone. There's so much disdain in your side-eye, spotting the busty violet-haired sweetheart his arm wraps around. After all, he's the worst kind of ladykiller.
And by that, you mean he absolutely sucks at flirting and can't get or keep a partner to save his life. Yet you're constantly stuck witnessing women, men, and attractive people of all kinds throw themselves at the good-looking man until he opens his mouth and they're put off by his clear lack of suaveness or strange little idiosyncrasies.
"Stop with the stupid bet, it's not happening. Nobody's going to be winning a thing."
"It's called usin' the damn 'magination, darlin'!"
"Which means you need to get better hobbies. You've corrupted my friends!"
"Hah! Them fools were already too invested in this 'fore I ever came along."
"Fill me up again?"
Intent on ignoring Seungcheol, you belatedly realize how aggressive your request comes across. You're also eager for something to help soothe ache in your chest. It comes and goes like a bad toothache — manageable enough to forget about the pain until it returns tenfold.
Thankfully, Wonwoo meekly complies with the back tips of his ears tinged red and Seungcheol barely manages to hide his extreme amount of mirth for the situation behind another glass. In the dim lighting, at certain angles, and with another shot of whiskey settling into your system, you conclude that the handsome saloon owner could certainly pass as Seokmin's brother and vice versa.
But you know the truth.
Familiar with the one who's all too identical to the infamous gunslinger, yet entirely different altogether. Irritation flares in your gut, prickling harsh enough that even the burn of alcohol fails to drown it out.
"I'm turning in for the night."
"Smartin' idea."
"Don't get too smashed."
"You should get smashed."
"Bye, Choi."
Tipsiness is a great excuse to bump purposely into him as you get off the stool. It's only thanks to his genetically enhanced metabolism that the pastor's able to stay upright. He grumbles something that's likely insulting, but standing upright causes you to realize you drank way too much. Everything spins or sways, including your body as you stumble up the stairs.
Somehow, you safely make it to the second level. Above the saloon is a hallway of small bedrooms that Wonwoo generously loans out to routine drunkards or stray travelers. It takes a few minutes of fumbling around but you finally find the lock that matches the first of its paired key and tumble face-first into (thankfully clean) bedsheets.
A hazy mix of drifting in and out of consciousness follows. It's not until the door clicks and there's an ominous creak of floorboards followed by a noticeable presence creeping up at your side that fully rouses you from the feverish dreams of gunfire, explosions, and loss that still plague your mind to this day.
You roll over, intending to assume both an offensive and defensive position against the nighttime visitor, but a hand lands on your shoulder before you can. Still sluggish, there's no way you could ever hope to outmatch the humanoid typhoon, even at your best.
"Hey, you."
It takes a bit for your eyes to adjust to the darkness after hearing his voice — and then there he is. Sitting on the edge of the bed, Seokmin greets you with a fond, megawatt grin. The thumb of his cybernetic prosthesis gently traces little circles over your bare skin. There's a faint hum and glow from its advanced tech mechanics, paired with moonbeams from the window, casting off an ethereal radiance.
"So, you're staying here tonight?"
"But of course, isn't that why you sent such a cute little cherub my way?"
Ah, Lina. You unwittingly smile, remembering how joyful she was to accomplish her mission.
Then your eyes close, nose wrinkling at the copious stench of mixed perfumes and alcohol he brought in and refusing to acknowledge what he says.
"You hella reek."
"Says the one who drank over seven shots."
"… That preacher's a fuckin' tattler. And a liar. And a total scammer. Don't fall for him, Seok."
"Now, what makes you think Seungcheol told me, hm?" He leans down almost nose-to-nose, enough to make yours scrunch even more at the buzzing feeling of how near he is. Your eyes open to squint at him and he winks. "Silly boy tried to mess with god again and max out his intake. Spoiler alert, he failed. Mingyu dragged him back to his room."
"You're the only one I know who can call Choi a 'silly boy'."
"'Cause that's what he is."
"And you need to stop acting like my babysitter!"
You shift away from his gorgeous face and he leans back to give you space, sporting a smug grin. "Then who would take care of you, mayfly?"
"How many times do I have to tell you not to call me that?"
"Be nice to me and maybe I won't keep count on how many glasses you down next time," he teases. "But since I'm so kind and forgiving, would you like a nice, warm, relaxing bath?"
Well, it did sound wonderful. TMI, but cleanliness was a luxury when traveling the desert. Even more so when the places you arrived at had Plant issues. Luckily, Seokmin was more than capable of fixing them but even then, circumstances varied. Especially around the one known across Gunsmoke as mankind's first localized human disaster.
"Only if you get one, too."
It slips from your mouth without a thought. But you might as well have told Seokmin you'd gotten him a box full of doughnuts with how delightedly he clasps his hands together.
"As you wish, m'lady!"
And he treats you like one, scooping you up into his arms in a princess-style carry. At least tonight you're more willing to let him do as he wishes, especially when he discards the perfume-infused outerwear. Whiskey, sleepiness, and the smooth material of his undershirt keep you pliant and cuddly well after he'd snatched you off the bed.
Seokmin's already ten times stronger than even a human like Mingyu and his prosthesis only helps take further advantage of that fact. He easily deposits you on the edge of the tub. Normal routine would require untying the tight laces on your combat boots but since you'd kicked them off prior to resting, he skips to the next step.
Deft fingers make quick work unbuttoning your shorts, the prosthetic digits of his left hand then moving to loosen the straps that keep your top on. His other hand holds them together in a pseudo-knot to keep the material in place.
Honoring a sense of modesty, you suppose — even though you've seen each other unclothed before. But you melt into the secure press of his palm paired with the support of his chest against your back as he leans over to turn on the water.
"Let me know if it's a good temperature."
"M'kay."
"You're so agreeable when drunk!"
"And you're still just as annoying."
"Okay, okay," he relents. Amicably even.
Seokmin never enjoys butting heads like Seungcheol constantly does. Although another "mayfly," gets tacked on to the end of his playful yield in a mischievous tone because if there is one thing, it's that he can never tease you enough.
Brown eyes quietly trace the ink and scars that mark your skin, some disappearing or completely hidden beneath the parts that are covered. Finally, they land on the silver chain around your neck, only a breadth away from the tip of his fingers that suddenly twitch at how soft you feel beneath the calloused roughness of his own skin.
You let out a little sigh and it shakes him from his reverie, noticing the tub's filled up past your calves. Guiding one of your hands to where the locket lies beneath your clothes covering your chest, he stands. "Call me if you need anything or just want help getting out, m'lady."
"'Kay."
You're already stripping bare but Seokmin breezes out the door before you can blink. You sigh again and slip into the hot water, enjoying a soak to ease the heaviness you feel.
It's hard to understand this emotional turmoil. Knowing that you don't enjoy feeling this way, you make a false promise to not drink ever again, staying submerged in the water until your fingers wrinkle.
Maybe you fell asleep, maybe you didn't. There's a bathrobe laid on the sink when you're ready to get out that you don't remember from before but who knows. Who cares? It's cozy and you haven't felt this clean in a while.
"All yours," you lazily declare, stepping into the bedroom.
Seokmin perks up from where he casually sits cross-legged on the bed, fiddling with Geranium. A dopey smile lights up his face, gaze moving from the hefty nickel revolver and zoning in on you.
"All mine?"
"Yeah."
"Yeah," he repeats quieter, more to himself, "all mine…" But when you unconsciously shiver, his eyes flash and brows furrow. "C'mere, I warmed the bed up for you."
"Aren't you going to bathe?"
"Yep, so don't miss me too much, my dear mayfly!"
He accompanies it with a saucy wink and saunters into the bathroom, humming. You find yourself in a bit of a daze, head and cheeks holding onto the heat of the steam from your bath (and more). You change into a light tank and cotton shorts before sitting back down. As promised, where Seokmin rested was indeed warm and smells of faint gun smoke that always brings back memories.
"Total slaughter…!"
Splash!
"… Total slaughter…"
Splash!
"I won't leave… a single man alive."
Splash! Splash!
"La de da de dai~," echoes from the bathroom. "Genocide…"
Splash.
"La de da de duh," splash, splash, splash, "an ocean… of blood."
"Let's begin… the killing time."
Seokmin possessed a lovely melodic voice no matter how nonsensical or gruesome the words he sang. Your eyes close with relaxation as he continues into a different tune. Though the lyrics are definitely more hopeful this time, there's a heavy sense of underlying desolation despite the rapid, upbeat tone.
"So…" splash, "on the first evening," splash, "a pebble from somewhere out of nowhere drops upon the dreaming world…"
You think back to how he silently cried when he thought no one was looking after a young stowaway on the sandsteamer broke into the same nostalgic song. Your heart aches in empathy for the woman whose heroic sacrifice saved humankind but left behind irreparable damage to twins she adored.
Rem Saverem.
She was to Seokmin as what Saint Meryl was to you. But your fondness for the nun who dared to favor one random orphan above the other equally ordinary ones with an unprecedented amount of kindness paled in comparison to the devotion Seokmin exhibited for Rem. Her kindness, hope, and love for and of life didn't simply become Seokmin's philosophies — they were a true part of every fiber, woven into his very being.
He was peculiar. Hardheaded — or in Seungkwan's affectionate term: a hardass — when it came to nonviolence. A true pacifist. Even when enemies held him at gunpoint, allies turned their backs on him, and his choice to always save was at the very cost of his well being… Seokmin would choose to tear himself apart limb by limb before ever causing damage or letting harm come to another.
And even if he always chose the world and those living in it first before anything else, that's what you loved the most about him.
"What's got you making that face?"
You're quick to school whatever expression it might be. Your tongue feels fuzzy. You purse your lips as he lumbers closer, freshly dressed in a comfy white long-sleeved shirt and black sweats.
"What face?"
"You know, the one where something's weighing on your mind."
The bed frame dips and squeaks when he flops down to snuggle against you. Still-damp, reddish-brown bangs lay across your shoulder and dampen your skin. The chilled press of the gold hoop in his left earlobe raises bumps wherever it touches as he endearingly nuzzles you.
"There is."
"Tell me."
"You need to dry your hair properly."
"Do it for me."
"… This is on purpose, isn't it?"
Nevertheless, you take the unused towel around his neck and vigorously rub at his head. No complaints or protests defending his honor come from Seokmin. Just the usual little trills of contentment escape as he leans into your touch. Once you're satisfied the job's done well, he plucks the towel from your hands and you fix him with a stern look.
"Well, Seok? You gonna answer me?"
He curls in on his lanky frame, enough so to find room to plop his head pitifully onto your thighs and nuzzle the bare skin with his nose. "Not if you won't answer me first."
"You."
"Hm?"
"Was… thinking about you."
"Oh, really? Dreaming about how cool, dashing, handsome, and awesome I am?"
"… Yeah. I like you."
He chuckles, closing his eyes. More so at the feeling of your fingers idly playing with his strands of hair than seriously taking what you say. "I like you, too!"
"No, I mean," you jostle him harshly as you shift anxiously, tugging a little too hard at his roots. "Something's wrong with me."
"… Mhm yeah, you've been drinking."
"Goddamnit, Seok… that was like hours ago! But… what if… what if I'm in love with you?"
Your fingers retract like you've been caught red-handed stealing Mingyu's pudding and a millisecond later, Seokmin's head flies off your lap as he sits up to stare incredulously at you and can only gasp out one word, "What?"
It comes out more like a statement than a question. You've seen all kinds of emotions appear in those clear brown eyes of his. Emptiness. Excitement. Happiness. Fear. Loneliness. Mysteriousness. Pain. But now, you can hardly make sense of what turmoil is swimming in those murky depths.
"There's no way," he shakes his head — laughter high and brittle. "Fake", is what Seungcheol occasionally points out whenever he spies the gunslinger's smile. You've never believed him until now. "You're drunk."
Seokmin's been hurt before and you know that. It's why you wish for him to be nothing but happy, that there's some truth to the joy he constantly tries to radiate. Hoping some parts are really healing, that he's giving time to let the bloody wounds coagulate — if even just a little.
"It's me. I mean, I'm the one that's drunk," he reiterates, shaking his head.
"Why are you acting like that?"
"… Like what?"
Perhaps you were too hopeful.
"Like I'm making some sort of mistake. Like I'm wrong about this. About us."
And still under the influence of the too-damn-strong alcohol.
"It's… none of that, it's just…"
"You think I don't know what I'm talking about."
"Well, do you?" he fires back rather harshly, "'cause you're still wearing that thing and —"
You wince as his voice breaks off, palm instinctively flying to where the locket rests. "What the hell does that have to do with anything right now? I thought we were over this! Years ago!"
"Maybe you were since you continue to stubbornly follow me everywhere!"
"I'm not the only one!"
"Yeah, 'cause no one ever listens to me!"
"I always listen to you, Seok. Even if the words that come out of your mouth don't match how you actually feel —"
"You don't know how I feel!"
Silence.
Seokmin's chest heaves, wide eyes taking in how you immediately freeze. That look, oh, that look on your face could kill him and his body moves on auto-pilot to stand, directing his gaze to stare daggers into the floorboards. Begging them to rip off like a bandaid and shield him from your wrath.
The wood beneath his feet groans, shaking ever the slightest.
"You're right. How dare I?"
"Wait, mayfly… I —" he switches gears with a plea of your given name.
"And obviously, you have no fuckin' idea how I feel." Now it's your turn to let out a disingenuous chuckle, fake humor cracking under the pressure of sadness it's struggling to mask. "You think all I'm after is revenge more than the actual thought even crosses my mind. You put on this show that nothing bothers you, make assumptions that no one can keep up with you, that you can do it all on your own."
"No, that's not… that's not what I meant! You know how dangerous —"
You stumble ungracefully off the bed, flinching away when Seokmin's words break off as he automatically reaches out. For you. To support and for support.
Yet, it hurts all the more.
"But what do I even know? How can I, when you keep everyone at arm's length? It's like… it's like I don't even know who you are! Like you're someone else, someone I'll never get to understand…"
To others, it might not make sense, possibly the dumbest thing you could say — especially with the state you're in. But you know Seokmin, a fact he's subconsciously taken comfort in.
But you also know Seokmin. Which means you know the exact place to hit him where it hurts the most.
And suddenly, those words you say propel him back into a moment from the past, body free-falling in the sky.
Yelling. Crying. Screaming. Pleading.
Begging that exact phrase and being demanded of the same accusation. All from the one who's falling with him. Whose face mirrors his own, but couldn't be more different in that crucial and devastating moment.
His brother. His twin. His other half who was once his everything — now a total stranger from the person he thought he knew.
A fifty-year-old reunion that should've been a reconciliation, turned into a doomsday.
And for you, the once simple toothache pain is now overwhelming your full body and you refuse to let him see how it's dampened your cheeks. Especially when you hear the pained whisper of the name that escapes his mouth when you're the one that triggered those awful memories. Staggering to the door, you yank it open and he instinctually takes a step forward.
Don't leave me.
You hear the unspoken plea as clearly as if spoken aloud.
"Don't follow me," is what you hiss out instead, and just like when you first met, Seokmin obeys.
When Seungkwan makes room arrangements — if there is enough money to spare when needed and the options are available — he books everyone their own private space. More often than not though, he and Mingyu share a room and so do you and Seokmin.
Out of everyone in the group, you're the only one who is used to putting up with Seokmin's idiosyncrasies and the constant white noise of the cybernetic prosthetics's technology. You've rarely paid mind to having your own space unless Seokmin gets in one of those rare 150-year-old moods and wants some time by himself. Rare in nature, because he doesn't enjoy being left alone with his thoughts that threaten to consume him.
But he'll have to make due tonight. For the first time, you're extremely grateful for Seungkwan's pro-activeness.
You lock the door, crawl into a fresh cold bed, and wet a new pillow — one that lacks the comforting scent of gun smoke — with unshed tears.
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For all his short-tempered and sassy mannerisms, Seungkwan is quite the worrywart. When the suns have peeked past the horizon and you're not already downstairs bullying Seungcheol, he's immediately knocking at your door and inquiring about your well-being. You assure him you're just hungover and he reluctantly leaves you be, likely picking up on how terrible you really do sound.
By high noon, Mingyu raps on the door next. He even sweetly offers to share his prized pudding in the hopes that you'll peek your head out. Though you appreciate it, you send him away, too — after reassuring the sensitive man you'll feel better after some rest.
Seungcheol doesn't miss the chance to be annoying times ten. He doesn't indulge in the effort of knocking, opting to make the floorboards squeal by pacing back and forth in front of the door. All the while, muttering this and that about "yer boy's like a pathetic dog and blah, blah, blah" until getting very kindly told to "fuck off!" and dragged back downstairs by a certain raven-haired insurance agent.
Even Seokmin checks in. Four times.
Once and then twice after you'd left and he'd figured out which room was yours. Then two more visits throughout the following day. He doesn't exactly make his presence known — but you know he knows you know he's out there.
If not by the distinct gait you've picked up on listening for after all this time, then by the hesitant thuds of combat boots lingering outside your door. Lost technology whirring with the action it takes to make a fist with his left hand, raising it up to the door and then back down again in self-inflicted defeat.
You refuse to see anyone, choosing to pity yourself first. Wallowing in your feelings and then sleeping as much of the heartache — and more so the hangover — away.
When the moons are visible in accordance to their nightly orbit, you get up to fuss with the mini VERnon in the room's corner. Nothing but static greets you. At the very least, the white noise is better than complete silence. By the time it's morning, you slowly awaken to the virtually enhanced radio trying to catch onto a faint signal. Enough to report the latest news in snippets with its mechanical voice.
"Beast… reported… Tonim town… !"
Your eyes fly open. Now is not the time to be wasting away. Donning a clean set of attire similar to what you wore into town — and with Sirocco strapped comfortingly to your thigh — you descend downstairs.
"Good morning!" Mingyu cheerfully greets with a delighted shout of your name and eagerly waves you over to sit next to him, waving around a promised cup of pudding. "Are you feeling better?"
"Mhm, thanks. Sorry about that, whiskey here sure is strong."
"'S one helluva killer," Seungcheol sulks across from you, still sporting a massive headache and looking worse than that one time Seungkwan hit him with the car.
"You're just weak."
"Wha'zat say 'bout you?"
"Since I can equally acknowledge both my strengths and weaknesses, that makes me infinitely stronger than you'll ever be."
Seungkwan wordlessly hands you a bowl and you graciously accept it. Next to the pastor sits Seokmin, unnaturally quiet. You don't even spare him a glance even though brown eyes burn into the side of your face until you glare his way.
The stack of doughnuts on the plate in front of him remain untouched — minus the smudged icing on one that was likely from Seungcheol trying to swipe it. Evidently, Seokmin was in low spirits if he didn't want to consume his favorite desserts. But, he is still prideful enough to prevent anyone else from snatching the prized delicacy.
How typical.
An awkwardness ensues, charged with an underlying current of tension. A vein forms in Seungkwan's forehead from his blood pressure rising.
Its pulse matches the twitch in the corner of his fake smile as he attempts to make conversation, to which Mingyu — oblivious and happy-go-lucky as ever, bless his heart — replies enthusiastically. Seungcheol stares listlessly into space, twirling a lollipop around and around with his tongue. Next to him is a soul acting like a thunderstorm's personally pouring over him. Seokmin starts pitifully poking at his grand doughnut pile while you ferociously tear into a piece of bread like it's the last supper before swallowing.
"Soonyoung's coming."
Your unexpected, but welcomed, interruption ironically pauses Seungkwan's second diatribe about Hansol's calamitous ingenuity. If possible, the apprehension in the room intensifies tenfold.
Seungkwan raises an eyebrow. "How'd you hear?"
"Tuned the VERnon last night."
"'Course you did."
"Something about the Beast and Tonim came through. Not for sure but…"
"It never hurts to be too prepared!"
"True, 'Gyu. 'N if Soonyoungie's gonna be there, ya know what that likely means…"
You nod in understanding at Seungcheol's implication. "The Crimsonnail."
Seokmin's jaw clenches at the name but it's the disgruntled pastor who continues speaking after a hearty and loud gulp of water. "'Course the Eye of Joshua's gonna send their best two. Soonyoungie's Hoon's eyes 'n ears for these kinda things."
"Or… it could be Jeonghan."
Your noncommittal remark receives Seungcheol's scathing glower. "Bet."
"It wouldn't be the first time," you shrug.
"There haven't been any notable disturbances and the ground's been stable. So hopefully their only goal is to simply antagonize us further."
Antagonize.
A funny word for such a twisted coin game between a hunter and the hunted. You can't and don't blame the younger Bernardelli agent — only you were privy to most of the true horrors Seokmin dealt with behind the scenes, Seungcheol a close second. And because of that, you were usually the one at his side before an encounter with Jihoon and the ever lingering threat and terror of said man's monstrous power.
But today, you get up from the table without so much as a glance in his direction. Only a parting command of "Let's regroup near the entrance at high noon," while Seungkwan and Mingyu exchange looks of minor distress.
The black-haired man in his hangover blues obnoxiously blows a raspberry as you leave.
Later, there are two solid knocks on the door as you get ready. You know who it is before the door swings open after your agreeable hum to enter. Many may be intimidated at the sight of the silver weapon in your gloved hands. Seungkwan and Mingyu make up half of the quartet who aren't.
They take a seat on the bed as you purse your lips at the reflection in the dusty mirror. Then you fuss with the strap for your gun. Satisfyingly re-securing it around your thigh before throwing a carmine trench coat over tight kevlar that covers almost every inch of skin possible.
"Surprised you didn't dye everything else black during a fit of rage."
Your lips curl upwards. "How on Gunsmoke would I manage that?"
"With the way you're acting, 'hell hath no fury like a woman scorned…' or so the saying goes."
"Really, 'Kwan?"
"I'm an avid supporter of women's rights and especially their wrongs."
"Sure you are."
"You would absolutely look dashing!"
"Thanks, Mingyu. Should've given my color scheme a little more consideration."
"But then you wouldn't have achieved such an infamous moniker. I mean, okay. Maybe the black plague killed tons of Earthlings eons ago but it doesn't have the same ring as 'Sirocco, the bloody rain that follows after the humanoid typhoon'…"
Seungkwan allegedly graduated at the top of his class, leave it to him to spew out all kinds of random facts that you know nothing about. You huff and adjust the brim of the large hat atop your head.
"All that does is make me cringe."
"Uh-huh, so what's making him act like that?"
"Who's acting like what?"
"Fine, keep playing dumb. Did you reject Seokmin or something?"
Mingyu gasps. Dramatically. Hands on cheeks and mouth open in a wide 'o' shape, puppy-dog eyes glistening with despair.
"There's no way!"
"I don't want to talk about it."
"Uh-huh."
"Besides, nothing happened so don't think you're gonna wheedle out of me whether you're going to win that stupid bet you two have going with Choi."
"Eh, don't worry. I've been out of the running for a while now, unfortunately."
"The hell did you even throw for?"
He shoots you a deadpan look. "Guess who's aged eighty years watching the two of you dance around each other like dumbasses? Could've sworn you'd be married with a toma farm or a dozen little children by now."
"It's your own damn fault for falling victim to that pastor's salacious schemes. And it's not even remotely like that, so…"
"Someone just doesn't wanna give in."
You stomp your foot, frustration boiling over. "Ugh, I'm never drinking again!"
"Wait… No fucking way…!"
"Literally shut up, Boo."
"I mean Choi did bet you'd confess and you know… get intimate afterwards… if you were drunk so…"
"Oh, so that's why he was so damn pushy last night."
"Dirty cheater."
"You expect anything less from someone like him?"
A sigh. "No."
It's a well-known fact that Seungcheol would rather stoke the flames of hell than ever needlessly dabble with holy water as one might be expected to with his chosen career.
"But judging by both of your moods, evidently nothing happened." The raven-haired man really has the gall to look disappointed that no one won yet pleased Seungcheol didn't, and the gall to point out the obvious. "Anyways, what did you bet on, Mingyu?"
"Don't recall!"
"Figures." Seungkwan's face falls flat against his palm with a groan before dragging it wearily down his face. "Whatever, it's not like it's that serious. Seriously," he adds on, feeling the burn of your perpetual glower. "Don't let it weigh on your mind. We need you fully focused."
"And when have I ever been less than what's expected of me?" You hold up a hand. "Wait! Don't answer. But really, worry more about that idiot."
"Aw, see? You still care!"
"… About that sixty billion bounty, Mingyu? Yeah."
"Sure you do."
"And truthfully, I was talking about Choi, 'Kwan."
"Well, both of them always get into those zany headspaces!"
You shrug at the tall man's truthfulness. "They're both holding a lot of trauma and baggage."
"And you aren't?" Seungkwan snorts with sarcasm dripping from the dig.
"At least mine's manageable. And… hasn't threatened your lives yet."
"As far as we know."
"In fact, I think I've saved your 'so-very-untraumatized' lives more often than not. Stay with me and you'll both be okay."
They good-naturedly give you individual looks of disdain. Perfectly in sync when you accompany that last statement with a devilish smirk and a twirl that flares out your tail coat with a flourish. By no means are they incapable. Clumsy Mingyu can adeptly wield his massive concussion gun when it counts, of course, and Seungkwan stealthily hides several derringer 'throwaway' pistols under his white cloak that he can fire with deadly precision.
Nonetheless, they loyally flank to your side when Tonim's bell tower signifies the hour of high noon has struck. Seungcheol meets the three of you outside the door of the saloon, smoking a cigarette and one arm lazily draped over the Punisher — a terrifying machine gun mockingly designed in the burdening shape of a merciful cross.
You spot Seokmin up ahead. He's standing on the low border wall near the town's entrance, perched next to a pillar for back support with the heel of his boot propped up behind him. Decked out in the usual galaxy ensemble, purple fabric cut off at shoulder-length of the top left sleeve to allow free range of movement for his prosthesis. His hair's slightly gelled up for a more intimidating and dramatic flair and it almost makes you giggle.
But there's that stern gaze focused on the horizon, likely able to see far out into the distance through those amber lenses the human eye can't quite decipher. Despite such a hardened resolve, his head tilts slightly up toward the blue sky with a faint smile on his lips — an honoring appreciation for the beauty and wonder of life despite its inevitable horrors.
Seungcheol clicks his tongue to get your attention while Seungkwan and Mingyu keep walking ahead. "Spiky Hair thinks he's really gonna do it?"
"Won't stop until he's tried every last resort."
"Even if it kills 'im?"
"Even if it kills him."
"This damned situation 'cause of ya know who."
"Dokyeom. DK."
"Nah, nah. There's the asinine version, eh?"
"Absolute pain in my ass?"
He slaps his knee. "Ah, aye… good one! But nah, 's really stupid one, Deathly, uh, er…?"
"… Deadly Knives?"
"Pfft, yeah, 's that one. So, we gotta try 'n stop one genocidal brother from sweepin' out the whole human race 'n tryna convince greedy humans not to keep exploitin' 'em with the other. Back 'n forth again 'n again. I swear…'s only ever gonna be impossible."
"What makes you think it can't happen?"
He looks at you like you're stupid. Maybe you are. But what does that make him? "Both sides — humans versus DK — think they're right 'n too proud to think otherwise."
"So you don't think they'll settle for a compromise. Or at least try to see the other's viewpoint?"
"Hell naw. Ain't no compromisin' when both think they're justified in what they're doin'."
"Well, regardless — you joined a good cause, Choi. World could use a little more peace and love, don't you think?"
He grunts. "Lookit who's corrupted yer ideologies. Don'tcha know what destroyed Earth?"
"And do you know what saved humans? Kindness. Hope. Empathy. Compassion. Change. Making and being the difference. The good kind."
A long time ago, maybe in a different twist of fate, you might've staunchly agreed with Seungcheol. But despite it all, you've been somewhat changed — or like the pastor said, call it a corruption of sorts — by Seokmin's unwavering sense of positivity and kindness no matter how bleak the future.
You admired him. Truly.
"Un-fuckin'-'lievable."
Seungcheol shakes his head as if he's not gearing up, ready and raring to go as he stomps forward to join a fellow 'brother-in-arms'. The thought inwardly makes you smile with affection until you remember you're actually, in fact, mad at Seokmin.
A dust cloud stirs up on the horizon, steadily growing closer to where you stand.
"You're so full of goddamn self-flagellation."
The individual where all your ire is centered on jolts, doing a double-take at your sudden but familiar presence by his side approaching. Or maybe it was the mere fact you were talking to him again. A warm expression overtakes his facial features at the sense of calm that automatically relaxes the tension in his muscles as he looks down at you.
"Well then, hello to you too. Feeling better, mayfly?"
"… Remind me to never drink again."
"I told you —"
"Yeah, yeah." You wave away his nagging and step up on the wall to stand next to him. "Don't worry, I won't be making a mistake like that again."
"… Mistake?"
There's an edge to his tone. Searching. Sometimes you hate how perceptive Seokmin can be. Though he actively acts oblivious and carefree, it's usually a ploy to lower other's guard.
You wonder how long he's known.
So, you sigh. "I'm talking about drinking, of course. And… I wish I could say I forgot even if… I haven't. But it's fine, I know where I stand."
The latter part of your sentence trails off. It's true though. You do know — thankful you can even be next to Seokmin. You might not be with him but at the very least, your place will always be somewhere by his side. Affectionate flings may be sought elsewhere. But they're always temporary. In your heart of hearts, you know you're irreplaceable to him.
And that's going to have to be good enough for you.
The man in question scratches the back of his head. "It's not… it's not like that. I know I fucked up."
"Stop." You grip at his prosthetic, knowing despite how sensitive the sensors are, they won't be able to pick up how you slightly tremble. "It's okay. Really."
Who is it you're trying to reassure?
"Mayfly," Seokmin murmurs. "Look at me."
With the slightest hesitation, your gaze finally rises from its focal point centered on his boots and the stones beneath to meet dark brown eyes. The ache in the gunslinger's chest eases just a little. It's been far too long — a day, in actuality — since he's got to lose himself among the vibrant hues of your irises and he squeezes your free hand in gratitude.
"It's not okay, I want to talk to you. Sober. But…"
"I get it. Now's not the time for a heart-to-heart, especially not in front of your brother's henchmen."
You laugh, for real this time. The sight is breathtaking; it makes Seokmin's eyes crinkle, a fond smile to accompany his affection as he leans in closer to you to whisper a sweet, "Thank you."
Three sets of eyes try to make it very not obvious that they're very obviously totally not watching the overdue interaction with bated breath.
"Oh golly good, they've made up!"
"'Course they would."
"It's about time, I couldn't take the tension anymore."
"Don'tcha think it'll get worse once they start canoodlin'?"
"Good lord," Seungkwan groans, "perish the thought."
"What's wrong with a little love? Yay for love!"
"Well, I don't think they've made it that far yet. But we're getting there. Baby steps."
It would be a good cause for celebration, a resumption of last night's festivities. Unfortunately, the merry moment is cut short with a screech of brakes, signaling the arrival of Jihoon, DK's most elite performer in his unmerry band of henchmen.
Next to the feared Crimsonnail's suitcase sits Soonyoung the Beast. Silver strands peek out behind the unsettling, bug-like circular mask hiding his face. He casually waves, acting like the unnerving discovery behind the innocent, abandoned child — who went by Hoshi — was simply a facade initially put on around your group and not such a grand revelation.
Having sorted that out in the stomach of a giant flying worm serving as a hive mind for Gunsmoke's legion of its original inhabitants and swearing not to let your guard down again, all five of you remain on high alert.
Jihoon's steel-colored eyes flicker to Seungcheol. "Hello there, Undertaker. Or… should I say Judas?"
"Howdy dandy to ya too, ya son of a bitch," the pastor snarls, spitting his cigarette in their direction. Cursing under his breath when the distance and uselessness of the fizzling stub doesn't blow up the engine like he wishes it would.
"Now, now. You don't want to make me mad, do you?"
"Kinda wanna piss ya off as much as ya piss me off, yeah."
"Surely you know what —"
"He means nothing by it." You'd quickly abandoned your post next to Seokmin to place a hand on Seungcheol's taut shoulder. Boldly facing the blonde man's haughty expression with one that's hopefully placating enough on behalf of your comrade. "He's just grumpy because he's still hungover."
"Well, well… if it isn't the humanoid typhoon's little blood shower."
Ugh, you inwardly grimace, why the fuck does everyone have such unflattering nicknames for me?
"Still following him around, I see."
"'S a lot comin' from —"
" — Hasn't gotten rid of me yet!"
"… Seems it," Jihoon sniffs and cocks his head. "Similar to the dilemma I have with this persistent bug."
Soonyoung chortles, neck contorting at an unnatural angle to peer at the driver. "You love me."
"You're delusional."
"Why are you here?"
Seokmin's question comes sharp and pointed like a dagger, a far cry from his usual demeanor. His tone remains detached. Aloof. Vaguely accusatory. Unlike your harried action to cover for Seungcheol, you don't dare divert attention away from the gunslinger who stalks forward after elegantly hopping down from his perch. Despite an outwardly calm demeanor, there's an underlying urgency in his gait that's threatening to snap.
"For amusement. A show, if you will."
"One that's not even orchestrated by Joshua's freakish cult powers!"
Out of all the males surrounding you, you're not sure exactly who growls at the Beast's mere mention of the devil-like figurehead — in fact, it could've been all of them — but there's one noise that rings out above the din of it all.
Click!
You don't need super-hearing to pick up that telltale sound. Not when every person over the age of eighteen in Tonim has a cocked gun trained on each member of your ragtag gang.
"Uh, so… how many times is this?"
"One too fuckin' many," you answer Seungkwan with a petulant hiss and reluctantly mimic him by putting your hands up in the air.
Jihoon cackles. "And when will you fools ever learn?"
"'S my question, actually," the pastor nonchalantly calls over his shoulder, directed at the town's ringleader. "Didn't know ya had it in ya, boy."
You didn't think Wonwoo had it in him either, to be honest. But that's not something you were going to mention aloud with the shaky hold the bespectacled man has on the firearm waveringly aimed at his target — the one whose head is worth a 60 billion double dollars bounty, dead or alive.
"Felnarl. Jeneora Rock. Descartes. Dankin."
There's a faint twitch in one of Seokmin's eyebrows. Seungcheol rolls his eyes, sarcastically muttering under his breath an addition of location names, "Voldoor, Inepril, December, Lewiston…" and Mingyu joins in on the fun with a cheerful, "New Miami!"
Seungkwan watches warily and your jaw clenches. You can feel your teeth grind together in annoyance as Wonwoo's smarmy sneer grows smugger.
"And now, Tonim Town. What?" he jeers, seizing the chance to use the man's silence as a way to ridicule him. "Don't recognize what you've laid waste to? Must I bring up the big ones to jog your memory a little, like the city of July and Augusta or the hole in the fifth moon?"
"Why you —"
Enragement propels you a step forward, but the barrel swinging your way halts your next move mid-step. The sullen look on Wonwoo's face surprisingly holds no malice. He looks saddened, if anything, but you can't bring yourself to feel too much sympathy with the rifle he's now pointed toward you.
"You forgot one."
"Pardon?"
Seokmin's voice is hardly more than a whisper yet it rings out loud and clear amid the tense silence and stillness. "I said, you forgot one. There's not a name of any place or person I'd ever forget. I'm well aware of the ones you're talking about… and more. However, there's somewhere I won't ever forget that no one will ever know existed."
"… Huh?"
"Little Ivywood."
Wonwoo seems so taken aback and the pause unwittingly allows your eyes to drift over to meet Seokmin's brown ones. There are so many emotions conveyed in the sidelong glance — a mixture of regret-filled feelings yet ever so soft — and it lasts a second too long to snap the befuddled aggressor out of his reverie.
"Oh… I see." He pushes up his glasses, the lenses glinting in the pale sunlight like a typical anime villain. The long gun lowers to the ground the same time as he throws back his head to let out a bitter laugh. "So that's how it is! All you do is take and take and take, Lee. Destroy, destroy, destroy; again and again and again!"
"Aye, ole chap's gone off his rocker."
"You've made an ally out of a would-be, should-be enemy and think other victims with their pain and grief don't exist?!"
"Wow," Seungkwan wrinkles his nose in disgust, "yeah… he's gone completely insane."
Mingyu hums in agreement. "A little unhinged! Off the rocks! Unstable even! When can I knock him out?"
You'd love to give the gentle giant the go-ahead. Really. But even so…
"Damn you —"
"Stop it."
The townspeople's uncertainty and hesitance tells you all you need to know, especially when Wonwoo's hysteria leaves them even more perplexed. After years of handling a gun like a second arm, you can spot inexperience and fear of handling a dangerous weapon the second someone is near one. You lower your arms and step forward once more, confidence growing when he makes no move to threaten you further.
"You don't want this."
The corner of his mouth quirks upward, a rueful smile. "You know, I thought we really did share some camaraderie."
"We do."
"Yet you gallivant around with a monster like that?"
"He's not a monster."
"I should've known better, really, when the VERnons said you're the sirocco that follows after the humanoid typhoon. Heroes, my ass! I don't get it, how could you do that to others after what happened to you?"
To us?
It remains unspoken yet you can hear the intent of the accusingly barbed question. Two survivors of a wrecked hometown. Shared camaraderie hadn't been a lie. Even now as you meet the flickering fire in Wonwoo's eyes with a blazing flame in your own, all you can see is a reflection of your past and what you could've turned into in a possible future.
A cold gleam returns to his gaze as he takes your silence as defiance. Or maybe even shamelessness. "How could you turn a blind eye to such a bloody warpath of destruction when you know too well of the tragedy that's left behind?!"
"Isn't that what you're doing?"
"… Excuse me?"
"That's what all of you are doing right now," you declare loudly and some of Tonim's residents whose conscience stings have the decency to avert their eyes. Awareness of their actions seem to weigh down on them, guns lowering ever the slightest and the awkwardness encourages Seungkwan to speak up.
"We would've left peacefully tomorrow."
"But yer actions're gonna be the very cause of the destruction yer tryin' so damn hard to prevent."
"Because you took a bribe!"
There's a stilted, horrified, and collective gasp, so you try to remedy Mingyu's exclamation.
"It's because you let your malice sway you. Tell me, Jeon. What all did you lose?"
"My whole town. Then my parents. Almost my life and nearly Lina's too. My lover…"
"And your sense of self. Plus, the new life you've created here — and those things? Almost lost because of your own accord. Why would you destroy the few good things you're granted?"
Wonwoo's eyebrows scrunch as his face tenses. Your heart goes out to him despite everything, hoping to get your point across as you continue speaking.
"That doesn't negate the losses. The grief. The pain. It never goes away but… you can choose to clean out the wound, put some salve on it, and bandage it or let it fester and infect your body 'til it rots even your soul."
You can hear the shift in the sand as Seokmin approaches to stand next to you. He regards Wonwoo with a kind smile and the understanding, crescent-shaped squint of his eyes is like a punch to the other man's gut.
"…. I —"
" — It's your choice, Jeon. What did they offer you? Money? There are so many bets on July's militia lying about the payout. I mean, c'mon, there's no way a ruined city would have the funds."
"Yer Plant's no longer in red status, so ya won't need to barter no more."
"I'll throw in a better deal — let us go and I'll have Choi marry you and Sherry, free of charge."
His cheeks flush and you inwardly gloat, instincts right on the money. Seungcheol's jaw drops, absolutely flabbergasted, and the townsfolk exchange a few knowing snickers.
"If it's protection you need, we can figure that out too," Seokmin recovers and offers in a low voice. "And if Do — er, Knives — or his gang approached you with a deal, just know that they never hold up their end of the bargain."
"You're lucky you threatened us first. DK's side is a little too slash-happy and trigger-loving to resort to verbal methods. They're the ones you'd want to go after anyways, you see, this man and Knives are twins if you don't look close enough, they're eerily similar at the strangest moments. So the real story is that it's all just spiraled out of control."
"You mean…"
"I won't deny responsibility." Seokmin admits sternly. "It's true that I've wreaked devastation to many towns. Failed to save the people I swore to protect."
"But DK keeps forcing his hand to get Seok to join his genocidal cause. And every time he refuses to do so, his brother throws a tantrum and well, knives go flying everywhere. Literally."
"He's a little…" The gunslinger searches for the right word — and finding that there is none — cringes. "Dramatic."
You stare at him, aghast. "He cut your arm off!"
Wonwoo pales, swallows, and then grimaces, daring to ask, "So… I've had it wrong the whole time?"
"I guess not entirely." You shrug, also guilty as charged years ago. "And obviously not the first."
"And certainly not the last," Seungkwan pipes up.
The bespectacled man looks down at the ground. "I don't… I don't know… Do I even deserve this kind of treatment? This… mercy?"
"No."
With such a blunt answer, Seokmin's quick to protest with an admonishment of your name while Seungkwan and Mingyu suppress smiles at your straightforwardness. Seungcheol freely chuckles, lighting a cigarette.
And Wonwoo's face falls as remorse hits all over again.
"But," you smirk, "what have I told you?"
"Oh, ah… why destroy the few good things life grants me?"
"Good. You were listening. We might get along just fine, after all." You send him a teasing wink. "Camaraderie and all that be damned."
A sheepish look overtakes the man's previously hardened features. And suddenly he's laughing with his head thrown back like earlier, but this time it's with an unrestrained amount of joy. Relief. Hope.
"The ticket to the future is always blank, Wonwoo." Seokmin extends a hand and the other man takes it, the small grin on his face turning into a full-blown smile.
"Guns down, Tonim town. The rest of you, come on out! Let's celebrate!" He calls out to everyone, gesturing for your group to follow. "Drinks are on me to make up for this whole mess. I'm sorry for getting you all involved."
You turn around toward Seokmin, elation written all over your face that he readily mirrors. Just as you're about to grab his hand as he reaches out at the same time, there's a slow, loud handclap that sets off mental warning sirens blaring all over again.
"Conflict resolution. How very touching."
The velvety voice is deceivingly sweet. But beneath the dulcet tones lies a raw and wicked strength. It rings out clearly, even more so when the jubilant mood abruptly dies down as a new figure approaches.
"Aw, c'mon Joshie! Just when it was gettin' good!" Soonyoung whines and you belatedly realize you forgot all about the real enemies at the entrance gate, thinking they had grown bored and left.
"What about that was 'getting good'?"
The Beast huffs at Jihoon's surly attitude, more than likely pouting beneath his mask. "Was really lookin' forward to those free drinks…"
"We don't need drinks and we don't need you, Josh."
If there's one commonality between the adversary and your group, it's the shared disdain for the elegant-looking man dressed in all black fabrics with shiny leather buckles, and slicked-back locks to match.
"Hm. But I think you do."
Chilling ochre-colored eyes couldn't be bothered to look at you, drifting past you and Seokmin like you were nothing more than the grains of sand littering every surface on Gunsmoke. And like a marionette, your head automatically swivels to follow his line of sight, blood draining from your face when you realize what he's looking at.
Lina.
She breaks away from holding onto Sheryl's hand after they emerge from the saloon, bounding toward her brother with excitement all over her face. The arm that isn't supporting his firearm extends gallantly outward, ready to welcome her with a hug as he strolls to meet her halfway.
They're smiling at one another with so much adoration after the intensity from earlier. If you weren't fucking terrified, you'd wish Dokyeom was also there to see how pure a sibling relationship and affection should be.
Instead, your stomach lurches, and Seokmin hisses beside you. With your back turned, you can't see Joshua but you're sure he's smirking when Wonwoo's frame stiffens, body jerking as it moves beyond his control.
Hastily, he's cocking the rifle with expert ease and assuming the perfect position to fire it, something he previously displayed no knowledge on before. Wide eyes have no choice but to peer down the scope and he chokes at how it's unforgivingly aimed directly at his little sister.
She skids to a halt, ten paces away. Hesitant. Wary. Puzzled.
"… Wonu?"
It all plays out in slow motion as you reach for Sirocco, simultaneously screaming out to your friends to alert them and provide cover. Frantic panic swirls in the air like a sandstorm at the turn of events, but even more fear generates when the townspeople can do nothing but helplessly succumb to their limbs moving on their own too.
Despite every single effort and all of his muscles straining not to do it, Wonwoo's pointer finger on the trigger pulls back. It doesn't matter how much he struggles to fight for control, his body refuses to listen. Tears flow from his eyes even though he can't speak, can't yell, can't beg for forgiveness — the vehement sense of horror is the only thing able to overpower Joshua's terrifying control, leaking out a salty excess.
Bang!
Bang!
Bang!
Three gunshots ring out at the same time. You fire right before Wonwoo does and Seokmin follows two seconds later. Not because his reaction time is slower. But because he could see and calculate where the bullet's headed after you changed its trajectory by shooting at Wonwoo's barrel.
It doesn't end there.
Seokmin is a half-step closer to Lina and can move at an inhumane speed, diving into a tuck-and-roll to reach her moments before the residents have no choice but to open fire too.
You know he's fast enough to dodge bullets at close range, but the staggered distance spread out among all of those present in the town's square works little for that insane advantage. Instead, the skilled combatant focuses all his attention on shielding Lina beneath the loose flaps of his impenetrable trench coat. She clings tightly to his leg, whimpering.
"Don't worry, I'll protect you."
Continuing to mutter reassurances, he pats her fluffy brown hair with an unshaking cybernetic palm while the other rapidly points his revolver upwards to deflect a bullet that might've been lucky enough to shatter the bridge of his glasses. Then doing the same to one at five o'clock on his right. He angles his body this way and that as if a puppeteer is yanking the strings connected to his limbs to the perverse beat of an unheard tune. The few he misses land harmlessly against the thick kevlar material you're all wearing.
Meanwhile, your steady hand supports the familiar weight of Sirocco. Muscle memory aids you with cocking the gun as you run. Aiming at the closest group of people near them and then — bang!, bang!, bang! — snipe off the barrels on their guns in rapid succession, rendering them useless.
From behind, something flies past your face and nicks the top of your ear — one of the few places unprotected by bulletproof material — causing you to hiss. Scowling over your shoulder, you squint in the direction it came from.
While a complete bastard, Seungcheol is also the most resourceful ray of hope in a shootout like this. The Punisher's automatic artillery relentlessly fires shot after shot, destroying old and weather-beaten guns like they're empty, crushable soda cans. It's faster too. The trigger-happy pastor twirls it around maniacally, taking only the slightest care to not actually kill anyone.
You're a hundred percent sure it's because of Joshua's disturbing power that allows him to reanimate corpses rather than Seokmin's "Thou shalt not kill" lecture and pacifist philosophies that keeps the supposed 'god-fearing' man from snuffing out anyone's life this time around. Despite the bullets whizzing around, you know he'll fare alright with that healing serum of his — just as long as he doesn't overdose on it.
Mingyu rushes over to stand back-to-back with the pastor, x-shaped claws firing out of his 'stun-gun' and immobilizing many of his targets with ease. You can't help but grimace though, wondering if they'll sustain more brain damage from Joshua's nefarious telepathy or a well-meaning concussion that leaves them unconscious and no longer posing a threat. A solid steel object flies past the brown-haired man's head, knocking down the mind-controlled person who was trying to sneak up on him using a blind spot.
"Ooh, thanks, Seungkwan!"
"Pay attention, you blockhead!"
An empty derringer lays at said blockhead's feet and Mingyu kicks it away with a childlike glee. A brand-new loaded pistol is already in Seungkwan's right hand even as he throws away the one in his left toward someone approaching Seungcheol. The young man's never empty-handed for long because with another flashy twirl from out of his cloak and a new handgun is cocked, aimed, and fired.
Despite the distance and conditions, all three work together like clockwork. Different shaped and sized cogs all interconnected to succeed without causing too much harm. And you know you must play your part as well, turning your attention back to the few townsfolk that remain.
"Seokmin, switch!"
It's not like he needs the heads-up. The way you'd both been inching closer to each other every time your gun's fired already issued the forewarning. It's like a subtle tango performed by two fierce allies surrounded by deadly enemies. If you didn't know better, it's similar to an intricate sword dance.
But you knew how dangerous it was to play with knives.
The swift transfer of Lina's warm little body into your arms is a welcome comfort. Seokmin sends you a dazzling smile, one full of confidence at a successful swap.
"Hey there, pretty girl," you coo and your gloved thumb wipes away one of the tear trails cutting through the dirt smudges on her face. "You are so, so, so brave and I'm so, so, so proud of you."
"He," she sniffles, "my… my… br-brother. W-Wonu!"
Pressing a kiss to her forehead, you turn her to face the other way. "Everything's going to fine. I promise. Now, run to Seungcheol. He'll keep you safe while the rest of us finish this."
Seungkwan and Mingyu had effectively disarmed everyone on their end and now worked on dragging the town's unconscious residents inside the saloon and attending to any wounds. The pastor stood guard near the entrance with his Punisher staked firmly into the sandy ground. Although empty of ammunition, the machine gun still served a purpose as a great defender with its imposing cross shape.
With the target assuredly safe — out of sight, out of mind — the control Joshua has over those remaining falters and starts to lose its effect. In the brief lull, Seokmin dashes ahead to deliver a flying kick that helpfully unsheathes the dagger hidden in the sole of his boots, demolishing one more firearm in someone's grip before it can be used again.
Bang!
Bang!
And with Sirocco's precision, the last two are destroyed as well. You match your comrade's grin and turn triumphantly to where the instigators still stand at the entrance.
There would be no casualties today. You and your comrades would make sure of that.
Joshua, stoic as ever, surveys the aftermath with an air of unbothered gracefulness. Jihoon fumes next to him. Panic spikes when Soonyoung can't be spotted at first until you spy him curled up in the car's front seat — asleep.
You fist bump Seokmin in high spirits. Then fearlessly meet a pair of deep orange eyes devoid of any emotion or warmth, a shift occurs in your smile. Confidence and satisfaction hone the corners of your mouth into a daring smirk and something about the bold taunt causes a rare flicker of humor to cross Joshua's lips. Whether it's scornful pity or simple mockery, you don't have time to figure it out because Jihoon snaps.
Nails.
Several of them fly through the air and their wielder's formidable namesake comes from the daunting color that makes the multitude of piercers look like thin streaks of blood against the pale blue sky. The spikes as long as spears are all fired from Jihoon's large suitcase-turned-crossbow that aims just shy of your left side.
Those steel eyes of his are as sharp as their color. The malice within them feels suffocating, so strong and heavy that it sucks all the breath straight out of your lungs. Only the pain from a nail grazing your cheek is enough to pull your attention away from drowning in the unnerving emotion and you put a hand up to the laceration to soothe the sting.
Wetness oozes from your skin, an unsettling feeling of sliminess accompanying the touch. Puzzled, your fingers retract and you ponder the sheer amount of red viscoelastic fluid coating them. There's so much of it pooling that droplets fall to the sand below while others dribble down past your wrist and under your sleeve, the stain blending right in with the fabric of your coat.
Drip.
"It's all your fault!"
Drip.
"Their blood is on your hands…"
Drip.
"Don't you feel guilty?"
Drip.
"Don't you feel responsible?"
Drip.
"Do you regret being the only one left to live?"
Drip.
Faces you know and voices you cannot recall overlap and echo. Unfamiliar frowning expressions and intonations you remember as once gentle now ridicule, belittle, and find every crack in your well-made armor. Insidious whispers weave inside, entangling themselves within the fragile support structures of your mind and very soul. They point and cackle to one another at such a sorry sight, only for you to realize you're angrily jabbing a pointer finger at your worthless reflection with those cursory words coming straight out of your own mouth.
Drip.
Your head turns robotically, like an early prototype of the lost technology Earthlings created. This time it's Sheryl who's the victim, helplessly well within the trajectory line of Jihoon's rage. Every muscle aches, weighed down by exhaustion. Your shoulder burns. Yet you still somehow find the strength within you to rush toward her, especially hearing Lina's desperate wail as she's held back by a grimacing Seungcheol.
Drip.
Like a comet, Seokmin blazes past. He skids to a stop, effectively shielding the woman right before impact. You're too slow to move. In fact, it feels like an out-of-body experience. As if you're nothing but a hologram inside the floating ship — an artificial intelligence projection with no other choice but to witness the horrors and observe tangible objects scuttle towards their inevitable doom without interference. You're left with no choice but to simply watch as the nails are propelled through the air with the intent to strike.
Drip.
Someone's screaming. Maybe it's you.
Drip.
The nails impale Seokmin without mercy. Strike after strike, they pierce straight through the material of his coat designed to repel only bullets and plunge deep within the muscles beneath his skin. One after the other. So many of them stick out of the man's backside like the skeletal bone formation for wings. He slumps to his knees, falling on top of a bewildered but unharmed Sheryl. When he only lays still with no further action, you're struck with the dreadful knowledge that he may never move again and it fills you with an unfathomable maelstrom of raw grief and anger.
Drip.
Suddenly, you're no longer drowning in invisible quicksand and can move freely again. There's zero hesitation in your now fluid movements — not even when the blond-haired man poises his crossbow directly at you this time. Pulling out the spare gun hidden near your hip, you blast the airborne spikes flying towards you without hesitation.
Bang!
Bang!
Bang!
Bang!
Bang!
Bang!
More fall than you shoot. The anger, pain, and grief you wield is enough to tear them apart like they're nothing but worm larvae helplessly caught in a sandstorm. You stalk forward through the crimson ire that relentlessly strikes down, clearing a path that's littered with broken, twisted, and dented nails before resolutely aiming point-blank at Jihoon's forehead.
Click.
More people are screaming and the spiteful cacophony in your mind resumes. But your ears feel like they're filled with cotton and this time you're stuck underwater. Your chest rises and falls, trying and failing to collect yourself.
"… out of it!"
"Hyperventialing -"
"Goddamn it! Get ahold o'yerself, woman!"
The Crimsonnail sneers.
Your cheek stings.
The dissonance reminds you of the wound from before. But this time it feels like a sting, as if someone slapped you — albeit rather gently. Numb, you halt in place and cautiously raise your hand back to your surprisingly unmarred face. But rather than skin, you grasp onto something solid. Something familiar. Something kind. Something loving. Something safe. Something warm. Something that's yours — always has been and always will be.
Someone.
And then… you open your eyes — and find yourself staring directly into Seokmin's sparkling brown ones.
"Y-you're dead," you manage to choke out in disbelief and his eyes incredulously crinkle into half-moons at the statement to hide the tears brimming in them.
The soothing hand caressing your cheek moves to wrap around the barrel of the gun you're pressing to his forehead and he smiles disarmingly. As if what you just said was the funniest thing ever.
"I know, mayfly."
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Part 2 | Read the whole thing on AO3
onlyseokmins: April 2024 ©
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sulumuns-dootah · 9 months ago
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NSFW Alphabet - Leviathan
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A/N: Sorry this took a long time. Been a busy and chaotic past month, but I'm working on things so hopefully they'll be ready to post soon. Also, Levi isn't exactly my favorite so I had hard time analyzing and accounting for all the lore we have so far.
⟡ Masterlist ⟡ 
‎‧₊˚✧ 18+ Minors Do Not Interact‎ ✧˚₊‧
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A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
If you had an intense encounter, you'd both need it, which is why he calls for his servants to come and care for the both of you. Otherwise, he doesn't mind to do some extra steps to get you comfortable.
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B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
Our nice piece of ass loves your neck. The loyalty noose would look amazing around it. Or maybe his hands?
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C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
I'd say his cum tastes like caviar. He's technically a fish too, after all. Definitely the king whose cum I'd enjoy the least. It's also not as opaque, but with a slight shimmer.
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D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
While he's having some me-time, sometimes he puts on a noose around his neck and orders himself to hang.
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E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
With how rarely he trusts anyone, I'd say he barely has any. He gets the gist, knows many positions, but hasn't tried out most of them.
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F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
Any position, really. As long as you're strangling him hard enough, he doesn't care.
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G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? Etc.)
No jokes here. In fact, no jokes ever. Besides like some special circumstances.
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H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? Etc.)
Perfectly silky smooth like the rest of him. There's no room for imperfection.
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I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
If he's bedding you, you're already doing something right. I imagine him being super vulnerable figuratively as well as literally with the strangling and all.
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J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
His main source of getting off. He can't even remember the last time he's slept with someone. Once you're in the picture, however, that immediately changes and his hands focus onto you.
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K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
Beside the obvious breath control and getting beat up, he also strikes me as the type that would be into voyeurism as in getting watched fucking someone.
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L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
Public places are out of the question. The safety of his castle is the only place where he allows himself to get loose.
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M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
Jealousy, of course. But also public humiliation as long as he sees you as more than just his subject.
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N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
Share a partner. He'd get too jealous and possessive. Unless, of course, you tie him up as a punishment. HE would actually enjoy that.
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O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
Force him to go down on you and you'll have one of the best orgasms ever. In giving-head-contest he'd come close second (only beaten by the pussy devourer fly boy). While giving him head, he'd get super whiny and needy. Tease him and he'll lose his mind.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? Etc.)
There's two ways Levi can go. Either he's downright lovemaking with you or the bedroom is a whole ass battlefield.
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Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
Actually, thinking about the location again... I wanted to say that why have quickies when you're at his castle and have all the time in the world, but thinking about it, If the need arises and you're not in his chambers, he would definitely use his coffin to have a quickie with his partner.
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R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? Etc.)
Depending on the risk. He wouldn't mind seeing how long you can hang from the noose, but wouldn't try and introduce lovecraftian horrors in the bedroom.
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S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
Leviathan's energy is stored in that juicy ass of his and boy, can he go for long time. The thing is, that he will, however, start complaining that he's tired and that you have to do the rest yourself.
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T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
Levi doesn't really strike me as the type to use toys. His imagination is enough for him. In my mind he's more old fashioned and all these different toys are just a riffraff for him. (Meaning he's too shy to buy some and would be afraid to get caught using them.)
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U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
Oh this man *italian hand motion* loves to tease, but the moment you tease back you have no time to react before you're hanging from the ceiling.
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V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
Whimpers. This man whimpers and it's the best thing you've ever heard (besides Beel's purring). How loud, depends on the situation. If you're on the bottom, some might escape him. But if you're on top, oh boy, all the demons in the surrounding chambers know.
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W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
Actually, not a hc, but more of an analysis of his H scene that I really want to talk about? Okay, so Levi makes it really obvious that he wants to be beaten and straight up just abused. This just screams to me a trauma response, which is extremely sad to me. The amount of abuse he had to endure to the point where his mind equates it to pleasure just so he doesn't go bonkers?
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X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
Once again, if you have the Erolabs version, you're lucky to see his sausage in the game itself. I personally agree with the ingame depiction of Levi's dick (unlike certain pierced someone's).
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Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
Actually, piggybacking off the wild card analysis, I think Levi can go anytime all the time. One of trauma responses tends to be hypersexuality (but I'm not a professional psychologist, so don't take my word for it). We even know about it from the Halloween event where Minhyeok says that Levi looks like he's in the mood despite fighting off angels.
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Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
Not really a sleep I'd say, but he wouldn't mind snuggling up after some exhausting workout. Just don't get too used to it since he's too busy.
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siconetribal · 5 months ago
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Put it on My Tab (20)
Pairing: Jason Todd x Fem!reader
Warning: Interview pressure, No filter
A/N:
Please comment/like/reblog. If you’d like to be tagged moving forward, please let me know! I’d also greatly appreciate it if rebloggers remember to add the tags (or some at least).
As always, a huge thank you and shout out to @harlequin-hangout for the amazing banners you made for me.
If you’re new to the story, please check out the master post for the rest of the chapters.
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An ache started at the base of the back of her head. How long had she been standing here with her neck craned back, looking up at the tall justice building that held the Gotham City Police Department. Y/N could count the number of times she had been her on one hand. This visit was not breaking that record, but she hoped this would be the only one needed. She appreciated the department as a whole, but like all places, it had rotten personalities. 
And now weirdos like Dick Dick. She snorted at the little nickname she had for the detective she was working with on the claim case. “Well, I guess he really isn’t all that bad. There are weirder people in this city, like criminals with themes.” The mumbled words were hers alone to hear as she rocked her head side to side to ease the tension before walking in. The ‘enthusiastic’ receptionist barely moved when pointing to a hall of doors, she eventually found her way to the right place and was led to an interview room. 
“Y/N, good morning, glad you could make it.” The young detective flashed her a swoon worthy grin. She was not sure if he was trying to charm or disarm, so she gave a small polite smile back.
“Well, it was either come or possibly have a warrant out for my arrest for fraud. As dull as everyday life can be, I like not having a noose around my neck. Plus, my boss would fire me, and I lack a sugar daddy for that luxury.” The casual shrug was in stark contrast to the wide-eyed shock that currently adorned the face of the handsome detective. His brows were so high that they were slightly covered by his bangs that swept across his forehead. “Everything ok?”
“No-yes, sorry, yes. I was just trying to figure out if that was a good morning or something else.”
“Did I forget to say good morning? Where are my manners, good morning…and now you can tack all that I said after that.” She said with a triumphant smile, taking a seat. “Have a seat, let’s get this statement down, and I’ll be out of your well-kept hair and back to grinding coffee beans and whipping up crazy drinks for overly privileged teens.” She motioned to the seat that was clearly meant for him to take. 
The corners of his mouth twitched as he pulled out the chair and angled it to face her better. He was thrown off. This was good for her, a little victory for her in all this. It was only fair that he be equally thrown as she, a normal Gothomite, would feel while in a room like this. “I’m guessing your dream job isn’t being a barista.” He chuckled.
“What job could be more satisfying than slaving away in a tiny spot with a few others, a single counter keeping you from the rabid coffee-addicted zombies that come rushing in impossible demands that they don’t even know they want?” She raised a brow at him, her voice was flat and dry. He chuckled again.
“You make a valid point, working for the public is not fun.” He briefly raised his hands, palms facing her, before resting on the table again. “Shall we get started then? As you know, this meeting will be recorded. It’s nothing serious, just formality and procedure. We can stop whenever you want, you’re not under arrest or being interrogated.” He placed a tape recorder on the table between them and clicked the red button. “If you don’t have any questions, we can begin.”
“Oh, one question Dick Dick, Nightwing gave me a tip that evening, do I need to hand that over to you as part of the claim or do I just keep it as a usual tip from a customer?”
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Dick Grayson sat frozen in place, the reels of the tape slowly turning as it caught all of her words. This was the second time today that this odd young woman rendered him speechless, but this time was different. He was not sure if he should be laughing at her words or at himself. She had not said anything wrong, and he knew that. It was informal, possibly derogatory to some, and very old-fashioned. It was something he never expected, and yet he knew he was at fault for forgetting he was currently speaking with the very young woman who had his usually grumpy little brother even grumpier than usual. 
But did she actually say that on purpose, or was that a slip of the tongue? She was calling me Detective Grayson up until now. Did I miss something? I can see why he’s all knotted up, she really knows how to throw a guy. He watched the slow realization of her words dawning on her. Her eyes widening, her back going straight as she sat taller, and her jaw silently opening and closing until words finally started coming out. A series of apologies and reassurances that she had no ill intentions.
“Can you strike that from the record? Like erase it?”
“I can have it stricken from the transcript, yes, but not from the audio recording, no. That’s, that’s going to be staying on here forever. It’ll just be disregarded, since we’re officially marking it as struck from the record.” He swallowed the laughter that threatened to take over him as she slumped forward with her face hidden in her hands. Her words were low and muffled, but he was certain he heard a few more apologies in there before she forced herself back up and looked at him. “As for your question, a tip is a tip. You said you gave them coffee, they decided to give you a tip. It’s got nothing to do with the claim, since all that’s being asked to be covered is the restoration of the window. Now, shall we officially begin?”
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As soon as the interview had concluded, Y/N was out the door before anything else could be said, mostly by her. The last thing she needed was for the detective to try to pry out anything more embarrassing from her. Her heart rammed into her chest as her mind so mercifully replayed her words and the look of horror that came across Detective Grayson’s normally jovial expression on an infinite loop. The flirtatious cop had shrunk away, and the look had to be disgusted, what else would he feel after someone called him something so utterly ridiculous. Regardless of his highly unprofessional dalliances, he never actually crossed a line with her. She, who kept it completely professional throughout the time, had blown everything up to the high heavens.
Because clearly, my mind is willing to give up the idiotic things that come to me, for free. Slapping a hand over her eyes, rubbing up and down a few times before combing her fingers through her hair. “Don’t say it, Y/N, don’t say it. If you say it, something worse will happen.” Climbing up the steps of the bus, she quickly took one of the few available seats and plugged in her earbuds. She sank into the uncomfortable seat, actively pushing the mortifying memory that would haunt her for the rest of her days, as she increased the volume. With her favorite playlist playing on shuffle, she mindlessly went through her phone and realized she was now staring at the old text conversation between her and her ‘capeless crusader’. Automatically, her thumb moved to close the screen, but the finger hesitated. It hovered between tapping back to her home screen and the input box in the chat. 
Maybe he’s a bigger dumbass and thinks I’m happy he’s out of my hair? She bit her lower lip as she warred with what to do. There’s no harm in texting, right? What’s the worst that can happen? He doesn’t read or leaves me on read? He wasn’t the best at texting right away with his work schedule. Not only that, but he could be busy. She reasoned in favor of him. “What do I even text him? It’s not like I’m living an exciting life.” She grumbled when one word from the chat came into focus. 
<Hey, I know this is late, but thanks again for helping me out. I let my brain just shut down and enjoy the first few days of debt-free life. The brownies you made were amazing. Didn’t peg you as the baking type. Books, bikes, and now baking? You’re a triple B threat, Boy Wounder. Are you still planning that meet up, or should I quash my hopes before they’re dashed?> She reread the message several times, tweaking the tiniest of things. It got to the point that she was getting frustrated herself and just hit the arrow to send and shoved the phone into her pocket. It was done and there was nothing more she could do except wait for would inevitably feel like an eternity or will actually be an eternity, if he decided not to reply. Nothing to worry about, but why would her mind side with logic? Today was to be a day of mental anguish, all thanks to herself.
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Tags:
@vbecker10 @wordsfromshona @harlequin-hangout @harpy-space @tild3ath @gone-batty-fics @princessbl0ss0m @dakotall @antiquecultist
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goldenseresinretriever · 6 months ago
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False Confidence: Chapter 8
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Pairing: Javy “Coyote” Machado x Reader
Part of the San Diego Dogfighters universe
Summary: The Athletic named Javy Machado the fifth sluttiest player in the NHL last year. He’s a known playboy who leaves every game with a different girl. As far as he’s concerned he’s living the dream, playing his dream job with the dream lifestyle. Unfortunately his friends and bosses don’t agree. At 33, they think it’s time for him to settle down. You’re a kindergarten teacher at an esteemed private school. You don't expect much when you finally accept your colleague’s invitation to attend her husband’s hockey game but when you accidentally get separated in the post-game rush, you find yourself in a compromising situation with the last person you’d ever expected to meet. When his PR rep suggests a mutually beneficial agreement, your hands are tied. How long will you have to keep up the act? And how long will you be able to?
Chapter CW: 18+ ONLY, swearing, angst, fluff, fake relationship, suggestive language, anxiety, I don’t know how car insurance works sue me, school system inaccuracies, hockey inaccuracies etc. There will be individual chapter warnings. No use of Y/N.
Word Count: 4.3k
A/N: This one’s a heavy one…
Previous Chapter // Series Masterlist // Next Chapter
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Javy hates the way his heart hammers in his chest, to the point that he swears that he can hear the echo in the single-stall bathroom. There isn’t really anywhere to sit and the toilet doesn’t have a lid so he’s planted his back against his wall for support as he squats awkwardly and removes his gear. He’s sweating like a pig at this point. Being in full gear isn’t anything new, but usually, the rink is at least cold and your classroom when packed with two dozen kids and at least half as many parents hasn’t exactly been a picnic. It’s worth it though, for that tiny smile you’ve had on your face since you saw him. Well, he and Jake, but he’s trying not to think too hard about that. You hadn’t corrected him when he called you Meep either. Hope tightens the noose around his heart as he glances at where he’s hung your keys on the hook on the back of the door.
He peels his gear off, wrinkling his nose at the smell and wishing that he had asked if there was a gym locker room he could use so he could jump in the shower but he figured an elementary school probably wouldn’t have those. Once he’s gotten out of his gear and he’s left standing amid the pile like a fool, he’s still hesitating to put on his clean clothes. He knows that hockey players stink. God knows his sisters and mom complained enough growing up. He wants to make a good impression. He steps over the mess on the floor over to the sink. He looks from the paper towel dispenser to the sink before he shrugs. He dampens a folded paper towel and does his best to wipe himself down. It’s not the same as a shower but it's something. He tugs on his clean clothes and sprays himself with a few spritzes of cologne for good measure before he stuffs the sweaty gear into his duffle. When he’s done, he grabs your keys, examining your ID badge. In the picture, you’re smiling at the camera, albeit in that shy way you always do, significantly different than the way you smile around your students. The plastic of your ID is almost completely covered by little stickers that he knows must be your students’ handiwork and he smiles to himself as he leaves the bathroom, and fumbles to find the key you’d taken great effort to make sure he wouldn’t forget, locking the room behind him before he heads back the way you’d gone.
***
When you get back to your classroom, Jake and Josie have fallen into an easy conversation that you’re sure comes from the familiarity of having known each other for the last five months. They both look up when you come in. Jake makes a show of looking around you for Javy before he quirks an eyebrow at you. “You left him there by himself? What if he falls in!” You roll your eyes and don’t miss the way Jake’s smile widens when you do.
“Jake, I teach kindergarteners for a living, and I promise you, no one actually falls in.” He laughs at that and Josie gives you an impressed look as you cross past them to get to your desk and you pull out your lunch before looking at the sandwich that Jake’s eating that looks suspiciously like the one in Josie’s hands. “You packed them lunch?” You ask as Josie reveals a third sandwich, placing it on an empty corner that’s now been silently assigned to Javy. Josie shrugs.
“Call it a motherly instinct. I know what Penny suggests for them since I cook for Reuben so I thought I’d make them something to hold them over until they get back to work.” Jake thanks her through a full mouth and both you and Josie make a face of disgust. “Jake Seresin, you’re a grown man, don’t talk with your mouth full.” Josie admonishes and Jake has the good sense to look chagrinned as he swallows.
“Thanks for coming, by the way.” You speak up before you forget to thank Jake. “It really means a lot to the kids.”
Jake waves your thanks off. “I love visiting schools. It was my favorite thing to do back when I was back in Dallas. I got to go to my old elementary school a few times, and nothing really comes close to that.”
“Says the man who’s won a cup before,” Josie says, arching an eyebrow.
“Well one of the times I went was when I took said cup there, so the joke’s on you, Jo.” She rolls her eyes and goes back to her sandwich. The door opens and Javy comes back into the room. Josie gestures to a chair at the closest desk to yours and Javy pulls it up. When you see him fold his much-too-large body into the tiny chair, you wince as you take your keys back from him.
“Here, Javy, we can switch seats if you want?” You start to stand up but he waves you off.
“Don’t worry about it, Meep.” You see Josie raise an eyebrow at you in response to the nickname but she doesn’t say anything.
“Meep?” Jake says, but his voice is garbled around another bite of sandwich and both you and Josie glare at him.
“JAKE!” He puts a hand up in apology and swallows as Javy grins at him.
“Okay, okay, I’m sorry, but Meep? What’s that about?”
Javy shrugs as he unwraps his sandwich. “She’s the Roadrunner, right? So, Meep,” he shrugs as he takes a bite of his sandwich as Jake snorts.
“You realize the Roadrunner says ‘beep beep’ right? Not ‘meep meep.’” Javy stops chewing mid-bite. Jake bursts out laughing at Javy’s reaction and you can’t help the smile that twists the edge of your mouth. Javy frowns at Jake but you can tell it’s in a comedic sense.
“How was I supposed to know that!” He complains indignantly when he finishes swallowing. “It’s not like it enunciates!” A giggle rises in your throat at the sight of these two grown men cramped into your students’ chairs bickering about Looney Tunes. Javy turns to you at the sound and opens his mouth presumably to say something but he’s interrupted by your door swinging open without warning. Your expression shutters instantly and your lips purse into a thin line as Jeremy comes in. He’s wearing a chagrinned expression that can’t be good.
“No way, you know Mark said he thought he saw you guys walk by his classroom? But I didn’t believe him.”
“What do you want, Jeremy?” Josie says in a tone that sounds bored. “If you came to bother the ogle hockey players, you’re going to have to buy a ticket.”
“Oh, right.” He shrugs. “When Mark and I were going to lunch, we noticed that it looked like someone had accidentally backed into your car, Roadie.”
“WHAT?” You can’t help the indignant squawk that comes out of your mouth laced with panic as you scramble to your feet, lunch forgotten.
“What’s to say you and Mark didn’t do it?” Josie says cooly, eyes narrowing. Jeremy looks shocked at the suggestion.
“Why would I even bother lying about that? My insurance would cover the damage if I did. My guess is that it was one of the parents who came in for career day.” You shake your head, unable to wrap your head around the news. You grab your keys in a haze, needing to see the proof for yourself.
“Roadie wait!” You hear Josie call out from behind you, but you don’t stop, shoving Jeremy out of the way when you get to the doorway and speedwalking towards the parking lot. When you get outside you all but run to where you park every day and your heart sinks as you look at your car, or at least what’s left of it. Backed into it is an understatement. The extent of the rear damage means that whoever did so was in a hurry and you blink hurriedly to try and stave back tears as you stare at the mess that’s what’s left of your car.
“Fuck…” You turn to see that Javy’s followed you. “Did they leave a note or anything?” Javy crosses over to inspect the windshield of your car. When he comes back empty-handed he shakes his head in disbelief. “Maybe they talked to someone in the front office?”
“Roadie, there you are! SHIT!” Josie and Jake make it to where you’re still frozen, staring at your car. Javy’s saying something to Jake that you can’t hear before Jake nods and heads back toward the building.
“I asked Jake to go see if whoever did this left their information with the office. Shit, Roadie, I’m so sorry.” As Javy apologizes, you feel the first fat traitorous tear escape your eyes.
“Oh honey,” Josie says as she notices the tear carving a line down your face, your lips quivering. She wraps you in her arms and you hide your face in her chest. “Hey, it’s gonna be okay.” She rubs your back encouragingly. “That poor car was on its last legs as it was. You said you’ve had it since you were in high school?”
“College,” you sniffle. “It was a graduation present from my parents when I moved out to go to college. And she’s not that old, she drove just fine.” Josie gives you a squeeze before letting you go and you wipe furiously at your damp cheeks that you’re sure are already starting to get puffy.
“You should probably call a tow, and then give your insurance a call.” She points out and you wince. You hate making phone calls, even though it’s an important part of your job, and you can’t help the way that you squirm at the idea.
“I’ll call the tow.” Javy pipes up and you look at him, surprised, having forgotten he was still here. “Take some pictures of the damage and we can go from there.” You nod wordlessly. “I can give you a lift home too, if you want?” The sentiment is appreciated but you shake your head.
“That’s okay, Javy, I’ll just get a ride home with Josie,” but Josie shakes her head too.
“Sorry Roadie, I’ve got parent-teacher conferences today, and the kids are just going to hang out with after-school care until I’m done. Go with Javy.”
“But we still have afternoon classes, I can’t leave yet.”
“I’ll come back and pick you up. Just tell me what time.” Javy says like it’s that simple.
“She should be done by 4,” Josie says before you can protest.
“Perfect, I’ll be there,” Javy says. “Now I’m going to call the tow, so I’d take whatever you need to out of the car.” You’ve given up control of the argument at this point so you just do what he asks.
“I’m going to go ask the custodians about getting some stuff to clean up the broken tail lights.” She heads after Jake back into the school, leaving you and Javy alone.
You collect your stuff in silence as Javy makes the phone call a few feet away. He’s finished by the time you’ve stuffed everything in your car into two grocery bags that you found under a seat since your trunk is jammed shut at the moment. You haul the bags around the other side of the car and place them by your feet as Javy gives you a once-over. “You okay, Meep?”
You let your shoulders slump as the exhaustion sets in. “Not really,” you whisper and he nods slowly.
“Do you want to talk about it?” You shrug and he just waits.
“I just… I just really can’t afford a new car right now.” You whisper. “And I know fixing my car isn’t going to be worth it, and I just… I don’t know what to do.”
“I could buy you a car,” Javy says nonchalantly and you wait for the laugh and when it doesn’t come you turn to gape at him.
“JAVY, I’m not letting you buy me a car!”
“Why not?” He says, cocking his head to the side. “I can afford it. You can’t. And let’s face it, if you’d decided to sue me, maybe you would be able to. So, let me buy you a car.”
“No.” You frown at him. “No, absolutely not, Javy, I can’t let you do that.” You shake your head firmly. He looks like he’s thinking about arguing. “Javy, I mean it. I’m not letting you buy me a car.” You cross your arms across your chest.
“Fine, fine.” He relents. “Then at least let me lend you one of my cars.” You gawk at him.
“Cars? As in plural?” You stammer and he shrugs.
“Yeah, I have three, and as you know, I only really need one.” You shake your head in disbelief.
“Still, I don’t think I could drive any of your cars, Javy… no offense.” He must realize what you mean and he laughs.
“Oh don’t worry, they’re not all like the one you rode in. That one’s mostly for show. It’s the one the press recognizes and the one I usually take girls in. I think I have the perfect one for you, actually.” He must see the skepticism in your eyes so he adds, “I can show you after work if you want? And then you can decide.” You know you’re not exactly in the position to be picky right now so you relent and nod.
“Looking can’t hurt,” you say and he smiles.
“Perfect.”
***
By the time the school day finally comes to an end, you’re exhausted. Javy ended up taking the bags from your car with him so you didn’t have to find space for them in your classroom and Jake and Josie got the front office to see what they can do to try and pull footage from the security tapes in the parking lot to find out who hit your car. You had to make the call to your insurance company while your students took their afternoon nap and you just want to go home and take an early night. You’re packing up your things after helping with pickup duty when a knock at your door makes you look up. Javy waves through the window and you motion for him to come in.
“Hey, you’re early,” you say, looking up at your clock that lets you know he’s fifteen minutes early to be exact.
“Yeah, I just wanted to make sure you weren’t waiting.” He says and you give him a tired smile.
“Thanks again for doing this, and sorry for the inconvenience.” Javy shakes his head as you collect your belongings. He holds out a hand for your backpack and you tentatively hand it to him and he slings it over a shoulder with ease. The floral patterned fabric looks comical against his dark t-shirt and muscled shoulders but he doesn’t seem to mind.
“Meep, you’re not an inconvenience.” He says and you can’t help the way your heart flutters at the easy yet sincere way he says it. He reaches a hand out to you and you’re surprised to find that you take it, letting him hold your hand as the two of you walk out.
When you get to the parking lot, Javy leads you toward a forest-green Range Rover SUV. “This is my usual ride.” He explains, before opening the trunk and placing your backpack next to the bags you’d sent with him earlier. As Javy pulls out of the parking lot he turns to you. “I don’t want you to feel like I only offered to drive you because I wanted to get you alone, but I’ve been wanting to talk to you. Well, more like apologize to you.” You twist the seatbelt nervously as Javy finally addresses the elephant in the room.
“What I did that day wasn’t just shitty, it wasn’t fair to you.”
“I mean it wasn’t really though?” You say, shifting your gaze down to your lap. “Even when we signed the contract, I knew there would be other girls, you know? I mean you have needs and I told you I wouldn’t have sex with you. I just… I guess I expected you to be more private about it since we were supposed to be dating.” When Javy doesn’t say anything you look up to see him gaping at you.
“You thought I’d be seeing other girls while I was dating you?” His voice is touched with disbelief and you try to ignore his word choice.
“I mean there wasn’t exactly a celibacy clause, and sure I never planned on seeing anyone else, but that didn’t mean I expected you not to.” You shrug. “It’s not like your job was on the line.”
“Roadie no… no… I… I never had any intention of seeing other girls when I was with you. I just…” He sighs and you think maybe it sounds a bit shaky. “Hold on,�� he makes a turn and you look up in time to see him pull into a fast food parking lot. Once he parks, he turns his attention fully to you. “I mean it. I didn’t plan on seeing anyone else while we were dating.”
“Pretending to date,” you interject and he nods.
“Right, yes,” he says. “Look, I haven’t been in a real relationship in years, Roadie. I just… well I told you some of it already. I’ve had a lot of people leave me in my life: my dad, my uncle, Jake. And I know it’s not a good reason, but I hated how that made me feel. I hated being left alone so I never wanted to feel that way again, and I didn’t want to ever make someone else feel that way, so I decided that casual relationships were the best way to do that. The girls always knew it wasn’t going to turn into anything real, I was always very adamant that they knew that going in, and so they didn’t care if I left, and I didn’t care when I did. And then I met you, and I know it was supposed to be an act, but it, it was the closest thing I’d had to something real in a long time and I got scared. Seeing our pictures in the tabloids, and then meeting people at your job, and meeting your kids, it felt so real and the idea of it ending, knowing it would hurt, freaked me out.”
“I was flirting with those girls before I even fully thought about it. I didn’t even consider that it would hurt you the way it did because I was so busy worrying about how I didn’t want to get hurt, and I’m sorry about that. I really never intended to hurt you. I promised you that I wouldn’t and I broke that promise and I’m so sorry.” When you look up from your hands, you see Javy’s eyes widen in response to the tears tracking down your cheeks.
“When I was a senior in high school,” you whisper and you hate how weak your voice sounds. “This guy on the football team asked me out. He wasn’t the star quarterback or anything but I’d never had a boyfriend before. I’d never even had a boy give me the time of day, and I was so excited that I forgot to be nervous. He wanted me. He actually wanted someone like me.” You smile slightly through the tears as they keep flowing. “He was perfect. He was so sweet and thoughtful. I didn’t really have any friends in high school and for the first time, I wasn’t alone. It felt so nice.” You wrap your arms around yourself to try and keep your hands from shaking. “And then he took me to prom and it was perfect, it felt like a dream come true. Then I went to the bathroom to touch up my makeup and I guess I didn’t take as much time as he expected because when I got back all his friends were high-fiving him and giving him money.” You swallow to try and dispel the lump in your throat but it won’t go away. You shake your head. “Turns out they’d had a bet over it all. It was all just a game to them.” You hate how small you sound but you manage to get the words out. “I felt so stupid that I didn’t see it sooner, you know? But I never once considered it or questioned why he’d want to be with me of all people. It must have been a lot of money if he was willing to put up with me for four whole months.” You’re shaking now. You’ve never told anyone the truth about Andrew. Not even your parents knew, you’d just told them that you’d broken up because you were going separate ways for college.
“Roadie…” You have to force yourself to look up at Javy. You expect pity, second-hand embarrassment maybe, but what you’re met with is white-hot rage. You flinch away on instinct at the intensity in Javy’s eyes. “What’s his name? I’m going to kill him.” You start with surprise at Javy’s words.
“It was over a decade ago, Javy, it doesn’t matter.” You shake your head, trying to talk him down. Javy shakes his head back and then he’s opening his door and getting out of the car. You sit up straighter, trying to see where he’s going and you’re surprised to find he’s coming around to your side. For a second, you consider locking the door in a moment of fear but you leave it. Javy said he wouldn’t hurt you. Javy swings your door open and before you can ask him what’s going on, he wraps you in his arms, pulling you close. You squeak in surprise, your seatbelt digging into your neck at the awkwardness of the position.
“It does matter. It clearly still makes you upset, so yes it does matter. You matter.” He enunciates the last sentence as he squeezes you tight. “And I’m so sorry that that happened to you, and I’m even more sorry if I ever for a single moment made you feel like you were reliving that.” Your heart aches as you lean into Javy’s touch and take a deep breath, breathing in the now-familiar scent of him. There’s a touch of sweat under the usual cloud of cologne but instead of wrinkling your nose at the intrusion, you sink into it, relishing in its familiarity.
***
You’re not sure how long you and Javy stay locked in the embrace but eventually, your neck hurts enough that you pull away. When Javy looks at you he notices the seatbelt digging into your neck and hisses at the sight as he instantly goes to slide his warm hand between your skin and the belt. “Shit, Roadie, I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
“I know,” you reassure him and when he looks at you, you know that he understands that your words are about more than just the seatbelt. He leans his head against the frame of the car and looks down at you for a moment longer before he looks behind him at the fast food place you’ve found yourselves in the parking lot of.
“You hungry?” He asks and you give him a watery smile as you nod.
***
Not long after, Javy’s back on the road and you’re eating fries next to him as San Diego traffic crawls around the car. “Look,” Javy says, breaking the comfortable food-induced silence you’ve descended into. “I know you told Zam you wanted out of the contract, but you still need to make sure you can keep your job, right?” You nod, taking a sip of your drink as you consider what Javy’s proposing.
“We have a better idea of where we’re both coming from now, and I think we could do this right if we tried again, but it’s up to you.” You nod slowly as you take a bite of your burger and hold out the fries to Javy’s outstretched hand.
“I think so,” you say slowly, “everyone already thinks we’re dating, and like you said, I do still need a solution to my job problem.”
“I’d want to propose a few changes to the original plan, though,” Javy speaks up and you nod carefully as he smiles around the fries he tosses into his mouth. “Maybe I’m not your real boyfriend, but I’d like to be your friend if that’s okay with you.” You smile shyly around your straw as you nod.
“I think that could be arranged.” You say and he grins at you.
“Good, and I’m going to be straight up with you. I won’t see other girls. I don’t want to see other girls. And it’s not an inconvenience. You’re not an inconvenience, not to me, and if I ever make you feel like you are? You have full authority to kick my ass.” You giggle and he fixes you with a hard look. “I mean it, Meep, if not you then I suppose Josie can do it, I’m sure she’s dying to at this point.” You make a point to look away with a shy smile when he gives you a knowing look. “And the minute you don’t want to do this anymore? Say the word and we’re done. No fuss, no bus.”
“Okay,” you say and Javy reaches across the console to squeeze your hand in his.
“I’m not very good at this, whether it's real or fake boyfriend stuff, but I’m going to try as hard as I can to do it right this time. I promise I won’t hurt you, and this time I’m going to keep that promise. As the traffic continues to crawl and you listen to Javy chatter on about anything and everything, you wonder if you’re going to be able to keep up your half of the bargain, because while you don’t have much experience in the friend or girlfriend department, you’re sure that what you’re starting to feel for Javy is more than friendship.
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A/N: So I know there was a lot in that chapter, but how are we feeling about the big reveal?
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riririnnnn · 11 months ago
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As I mentioned in my post earlier:
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His cuff (that thing around his neck) is near transparent which gives us a lot of room to ponder since we don't exactly know what this chain even represent.
Taking Hiori as an example, let's suppose the chain represents the burden that holds back someone's true ego.
His cuff being transparent gives us two things:
1. It might be plastic which doesn't really make any sense if I were to be honest.
2. It is glass which makes a lot of sense because how's glass? Hell yeah, my geniuses, glass is really fragile which completely fits into what he said:
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Further, in that volume cover, he has pulled down his collar which puts a lot of spotlight into his blue rose tattoo, and we all know what that tattoo symbolises for Kaiser.
In case you don't remember: Kaiser got this tattoo as a reminder to himself to never fall back into his weak mentality because Blue Rose symbolises the achievement of impossible, and he saw it as an example to turn impossible to reality since Blue Rose, itself, is artificial and defies the natural order.
What is said above can be found with a quick Google search:
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But what grabbed my most attention is this panel:
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WHY?
If he only wanted to push the soccer industry to despair, then why he is adamant about winning the Champions league and the World Cup?????
Also, contrary to popular beliefs, I don't actually think Kaiser has a superiority complex because, look:
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What Chris said could be considered as an exaggerated way to rile someone, but isn't this, indirectly, exactly what Kaiser says after the Manshine City match ended?
Kaiser said something along the lines of, "BM's main character is Noa and it's impossible for me to be the current number one, that's why I came to NEL to use Isagi as a way to increase my value." He even went as far as to say that he is a secondary character in BM because BM is Noa's team.
I don't think so that anyone with superior complex will admit such real facts.
Further, why did he got so angry when Chris said those things? Isn't someone bound to be angrier if the other one was to point out their obvious weak point? So, does this mean, Kaiser actually got an inferior complex?
I'm not a psychologist, so I'm not dwelling too much into it.
However, there is another thing I want to point out:
So, because of that spreadsheet/official art of a very damaged soccer ball beside Kaiser's foot, the Fandom widely believes that Kaiser was poor while growing up .
BUT!
Being poor as a backstory has already been used three times: Naruhaya Asahi, Noel Noa, and Lorenzo Don.
I understand that in any sector with a lot of money and/or fame, there are many people who come from a poor economic background, but this is fiction, baby. No author wants anything be repeated to the point it feels overused.
That's why, I highly believe that Kaiser was either bullied or mistreated by his seniors when he started playing soccer which explains that he practiced fucking hard that the soccer ball was damaged, and also his supposed hatred towards the soccer industry. It also explains his long, unkempt hair because he was too indulged in practice.
OR!
It goes a bit darker, so proceed with caution:
Soccer somehow destroyed his family's peace just like the brotherhood of Itoshi brothers.
I may write about others in another post, but in this post, I would like to think that the person who destroyed his family's peace was his own father. It could be that his father was a soccer player himself and due to some circumstances, he fell off the soccer industry which took a toll on his mental health, and he started physically abusing either Kaiser, his mom or both.
Why physical abuse? Because Kaiser is shown having an affinity to choking.
If we get our minds out of the gutter, then there have been instances when he choked himself because he was frustrated. Also, didn't he say that he stroked his rose tattoo as a good luck before matches and compared it to, "as if tightening a noose," or something.
That's why, I kinda think that, AT LEAST, someone has choked Kaiser as abuse/bullying.
I'll rant about the above thing in another post tomorrow or some time later because I don't want this post to be too long, and also because I'm hungry af.
.
.
.
I remember a vivid dream when Kaiser threatened me to join BM.
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charmwasjess · 2 months ago
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My tiny mountain town is a blue dot swallowed up in a sea of red. Our statistically-irrelevant town went for Harris. The larger counties around us all went for Trump. Here’s what this election looked like in the southeastern Appalachian on the front lines of that cultural divide: 
Outright unprosecuted voter intimidation: in the few blocks walk from my house to downtown, I can see a prop skeleton dressed as a Harris supporter hanging from a noose, and Harris yard signs slashed with a knife, others just ripped down to the cardboard.
Gerrymandering - years ago, these little-known poorer districts were redrawn around population centers in ways that give likely Republican strongholds more weight, particularly in rural areas like mine. Republican lawmakers literally have opened prisons in rural counties in my state to artificially inflate population numbers with people who can’t vote due to their felon status to tip the scales.  
Of course, the Electoral college, where US votes are decided by weight of a state’s respective collective population and importance rather than just the counted individuals votes
I’m not making excuses. I echo the rest of the world’s collective disgust and horror about the outcome. I am literally sick with my country. People will die because of this. People who don’t live here, people who didn’t get a choice or stake in the US elections, and who probably wish they’d never heard of the place. And people in my own community. 
Yet it is so easy to picture this election as the ultimate triumph of laziness and inattention, particularly in “ignorant hillbilly” places like where I live, which generally go for Trump without any fight - at least not one that shows up on an election night map. But the Republican right has been working for decades to put the legal, economic, and societal pressures that lead to this in place here. 
We fought hard. Grassroots campaigners, our organizers of LGBTQIA+ groups, leaders in our communities who showed up despite the fact that it put a target on their backs if shit went bad. Teachers fighting Republican-led mandates of ignorance and racism to choke out any thinking that might interfere with their political goals for their ideal voter base. Librarians who get death threats for having kid’s books dealing with gender or queerness in the public libraries. 
These are not imagined examples, these are things that happen to real people I know in my tiny blue community. And the violent, right-wing party, the party that promised to make this second Trump term one of revenge and retribution, knows who those people are too. 
The Charlottesville “Ignite the Right” attack happened in my backyard. I had friends on that street when a self-described neo nazi drove into a crowd and killed Heather Heyer and injured 35 others. Trump was president when it happened; he called the alt-right who invaded Charlottesville with guns and armor and torches that day “good people.” 
I have no faith in my party now. It feels like we’re still trying to play a game we lost years ago, while the other side is busy winning a new game, one where they get to make up all the rules. 
I realize that there are greater global trends at play - incumbents being ousted, a swing to the right, post-pandemic economic scrambles - larger issues than the difficulties of voter suppression in my rural American communities. I'm not in a great mindset to consider them this week. I've been politically active since I was old enough to vote, and it feels like we always build so much momentum and then slam facefirst into this fucking invisible wall.
Honestly? I’m so tired and depressed and anxious, I feel like I can barely function right now. At the same time, I’m disgusted by my own despair and whining. What gives me the right to stop trying now, when so many people across the globe are facing the same anger and exhaustion? When so many people are in more active danger, with less options than I have?
Anyway, I wanted to write something out about the election, maybe just to let go of the words and get them out of me. I'm a queer politically active liberal in a Republican-dominated rural space. Next week, I'll read all the posts about hard work and hope and building support networks. This week, I just need a fucking minute on the floor.
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falloutjuli · 1 year ago
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Hey I love your blog! That post that you wrote with y/n moving in with Chuuya had me kicking my feet and screaming it’s just *chefs kiss* perfect ❤️‍🔥 if your requests are open can I ask for Chuuya and Dazai with an artsy reader who loves to crochet and make them small clothing pieces/plushies? I’m so down bad for these men istg
Thank you so much for your nice words! It really means a lot to me to hear that you like it. Chuuyas part is shorter (no pun intended :D), since I struggled to write more. If I later come up with more ill come back to edit this post. For now, I hope you enjoy this! Dazais scenario was a lot of fun specifically!
_______________ Chuuya Nakahara/Dazai Osamu x artist!Reader!
Warnings: Dazai typical suicide mentions, Crack _______________
Requests are currently open!
Masterlist - Rules for Requests
Dazai:
Adores his plushie mini-me.
Definitely showed it around the ADA, asking everyone “You see this? They made it for me! Me! The similarity is striking, isn’t it?”
Requested a crocheted noose for his mini-me, so that “He can live the dream.”
Kunikida eventually got annoyed because instead of working Dazai kept playing with his plush, so he banished it to Dazais locker.
He now hangs it in there by the noose every time, not wanting Kunikida to potentially confiscate it.
You invited Dazai to make more mini plushies with you, which he did take you up on.
And while your skilled hands got Mini Ranpo, Atsushi, Yosano, Fukuzawa, Kyouka, Kenji and the Tanizaki siblings done, Dazai worked on Kunikidas mini me.
Definitely drew angry eyebrows on Kunikidas already rough looking doll, giggling like a madman.
“Hey there!”You called into the office, quickly slipping in with a giftbag and some baked goods. You were immediately greeted by the ADA staff who coincidentally were all gathered in the main room.
Dazai already knew why you were here, so he happily spun in his chair, his sly grin ever so present on his face. Before you could even set the plates of muffins down, Ranpo had already stolen two off it, peeking in the giftbag as he did. “As a thanks for helping me out last month, I made all of you something!” You proclaimed and started giving everyone their mini-me.
Fukuzawa thanked you wholeheartedly, unable to hide the big smile when he spotted the cat you made extra for him. Kenji and Yosano both inspected the cute plushes, marveling at the details, like Yosanos Butterfly accessories and chainsaw and Kenjis little hat and street sign.
Ranpos Mini-me was promptly placed on his desk, while he was busy eating the muffins you had brought along. Atsushi kept asking how you were able to do that and if he could learn it too and Kyouka just starred at hers with a blushing face, only able to mutter a quiet “Thank you!”when you passed her a muffin.
As you shuffled to Kunikida, you whispered your apologies to him, while Dazai presented Mini-Kunikida. The proportions looked off, it wasn’t as well made as the others and the big black marker made eyebrows had the ADA laugh as the blond took it from your boyfriend.
“Thank you..I’m guessing you made it, Dazai?”He asked, unsure what to say to the plush.
“Yes! One hundred percent handmade, with these Hands!”Dazais said, showing off his hands.
While everyone was talking, showing off their gifts to one another, Dazai pulled you close, hugging you from behind.
----
Chuuya:
His plushie sits on his work desk and if someone makes it fall off, he will pretend to not care, but he will softly pick it up to put it back on its place once they leave.
Normally not the kind of guy to integrate crotched clothing into his styles but he changes it a little so he can wear something you made when hes casually out and about.
Became a big fan of the socks you made for him, all with patterns to match him of course.
Tried crocheting with you once, but its not really his thing. He does like watching you though or helping you if you need it, while he sits next to you doing his own thing.
Offers you to buy anything you need. Need new materials? Well get ready to be taken shopping and if you as much as look at something, it’ll be put in your basket.
Would 100% ask for a crotched dog, made to look like the one from his favorite movie.
“Doll?”He asks, watching as you resumed your pattern, after taking a sip from your share of the wine. “Yes Chuu?”
”You think you could make me a dog plush? Like the one from ‘The boy and The Puppy’?”
You laughed, leaning onto his shoulder as you continued. “Sure! I’ll finish this one and then see what I can do.”
He pressed a kiss on top of your head, smiling already just thinking about the tiny plush.
It took a while until you had it ready, you did the final steps while enjoying a nice evening with him on the couch, watching said movie.
“There. It’s all done!” You finally proclaimed and sat your material down, before handing Chuuya the newly made plush.
You thought you had outdone youreself this time, it looked so much like the dog from the movie, so you hoped Chuuya would love it just as much.
The ginger spun it around looking at it in awe.
“I still can’t believe you can just create things like this. Thank you so much!”
He quickly gave you a kiss, pulling you close to cuddle with you, as his eyes kept darting from his plush to the movie template.
"I am so lucky to have you, doll." He mumbled, still not believing that his partner could make all these lovely presents for him.
From his mini-me plush, to the wine themed socks you made and now this plushie he will forever treasure all these little things you made specifically for him.
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hostess-of-horror · 2 months ago
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I just had this AU idea all day today and I am so brainrotted right now that I need to put this down on a post. I haven't figured out a whole lot but at least it's enough to get the idea.
L'Opéra Numérique
(or The Amazing Digital Opera)
- A TADC AU that's heavily inspired by Gaston Leroux's The Phantom of the Opera but not verbatim
- Reeks of Showtime, as Pomni and Caine are the two main stars: Christine Daae and Erik the Phantom
- Takes place in L'Opéra Numérique where everyone is part of a massive opera house with Caine being the Host (Opera Ghost) that "haunts" it
- L'Opéra Numérique is a literal labyrinth (🎶where night is bliiiind~🎶) and has no exit that anyone knows of; every path circles back to the main theatre
- Pomni, like the show, is the most recent arrival and becomes a wildly popular soprano, replacing Jax as the main star
- This leads to Pomni being the Host's object of affection, tutoring her in the hopes of making her a national treasure within the digital world
- While everyone plays along, Pomni becomes an "agent" for the rest of the gang in the hopes of figuring out who this Host is and how to escape the Opera
- The Gang all plan to have Pomni visit the Host, which leads to the iconic Mirror Scene as well as the Phantom's Lair and Unmasking Scene (🎶Music of the Niiiiiight!🎶)
- Unlike the source material, there is no "Raoul" for Pomni; only her newfound friends
- The main romance is the tragic love story between Caine and Pomni, where Caine obsesses over her to the point of madness and Pomni pities him despite the circumstances
- Caine as the Phantom is deformed a la abstraction, with his glowing eyes and sharp teeth exposed like a dark eldritch horror
- The Gang's plan for Pomni are all written in multiple notes, passed around by each member of the Opera as to not let Caine figure out what they're doing (🎶far too many notes for my taste...🎶)
- Of course, Caine does in fact find those notes and things go south real fucking fast.
- Since no one can die in the digital world, Caine's Punjab Lasso (noose) paralyzes the victim rather than strangle them to death
- Caine still drops the chandelier though... a few times, actually!
- When Caine hosts a Masquerade party, he reveals himself to everyone in his "Blue Screen of Death" costume (🎶 Why so silent, good monsieurs? 🎶)
- Did I mention Bubble is the Daroga in this AU? Because Bubble is the Daroga in this AU.
- So, Bubble is basically a NPC controlled by an investigator who was trying to release the missing people (Pomni and the Gang)
- Turns out Bubble and Caine knew each other personally outside of the digital world, but Caine has been the Host of the Opera for God knows how long that he has completely forgotten who he was before
- Oh yeah, Caine is NOT an AI in this AU! He was actually a game developer who was rejected multiple times until he eventually got stuck inside his own creation (I haven't gotten the full story so bear with me here)
- So while that's being revealed, Caine does his Phantom thing and writes an opera where he and Pomni fall in love (🎶Past the Point of No Return 🎶) until Pomni reveals his face
- Final Lair ensues, which leads to Bubble and the Gang being trapped and tortured until Pomni agrees to marry Caine via turning the Scorpion (the Grasshopper would crash the whole Opera)
- The story ends with Caine releasing everyone, including Pomni, and telling Bubble/the investigator how having Pomni as his bride made him remember what he had lost ("I! I! ...I kissed her! And she did not die of horror!") and thus destroying L'Opéra Numérique and himself
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lizadale · 5 months ago
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Sorry to bother, do you have any writing of research arc? The drawings of the Shadow Queen meeting look so exciting!
i have like.......the beginning of the arc i can post, i guess. since i haven't posted anything of dimigi au in 62 years. it's only 3000 words though, don't get excited
[]
You despise sea travel.
Getting to Rogueport will be the hardest part of this undertaking, you hope. You are already thanking whatever star is watching over you for allowing you to be born an Ancient of Way, so you will not need a repeat of traveling while half-slung over the starboard railing of a rickety boat.
“Doesn’t floating in midair kind of go the same way?” Luigi asks, sympathetically holding your hair back.
No, it doesn’t. When you put yourself in the air, you’re controlling the air currents and making use of them. The ocean waves are not controllable, and just the thought of getting lost in them was enough to almost turn you away from this journey. There is too much at stake now, but only because Luigi’s dominant element is water did you resign yourself to the one available route to this abhorrent place with the feeble assurance that if something where to happen to the boat, he might not let you drown.
You never actually vomit, but you constantly feel like you should be. It’s a nausea that permeates your core and makes you wobble even when you get to solid ground; Luigi dutifully picks you up and carries you under his arm out of sight of the pier. You close your eye and tip your feet upward for some semblance of equilibrium until the wave passes out of you, and he sets you down on something wooden. He rolls you onto your left arm and sits beside you patiently.
Even when you start to recover, the smell of the town doesn’t exactly provide any relief. Even Earth didn’t smell this bad. You crack your eye open, but Luigi is sitting so close to you that all you can see is the dark denim of his jeans, so you roll onto your back. Directly above you hangs a loop of thick rope, swinging gently in the sea breeze.
“Oh, this is charming,” you drawl as your head clears.
“Are you feeling better?” Luigi leans back on his hands and peers down at you, like the both of you resting on a gallows is an ordinary activity, like it’s just a normal piece of furniture. “Mario says you should lay on your left side if you’re nauseated. Something about where your organs are located.”
“People die here,” you remind him, if only to measure whether he knows where he’s sitting.
He pats the wood almost affectionately. “Nah,” he says. “It’s just a threat.”
You sit up and pull your hood over your face when you see how many bystanders are milling about. No one in Rogueport seems to have any real agency, from what you can tell. One might classify them as professional loiterers. Still, the sight of two people lounging around a noose will always cause some odd looks.
The reason Luigi chose the gallows as a seat, you discover by looking at your surroundings, is most likely because it is the least dirty spot in this square. There is trash everywhere, from solid plastic or metal waste to decades of grime lining the eroding cobblestone, and yet the wooden structure in the middle of town remains eerily pristine, like everyone is afraid to sully it. A threat, he said.
“You can tell?” you ask with interest.
Luigi stands and checks his pants for splinters. “Fear leaves a strong residual,” he says. “It’s pretty easy to tell what’s been used to kill someone.”
Which is an entirely irrational thing to say unless you’re the Moon, you suppose. You do not envy empaths.
You let him grab your hand and haul you up off the wooden steps and toward the edge of town, where the buildings begin to look more and more dilapidated, but you always have had trouble stemming your curiosity.
“So, if someone handed you a gun,” you start, wondering if this is similar to when he somehow knew by touching the sofa that Merlon had been in the house, “you would know how many people were killed by it?”
He has the gall to look confused. “Uh, have you ever seen a gun? The bullet is the part that kills people. I mean, unless you pistol-whip someone to death—”
“A sword, then,” you offer, refusing to let him bypass the question by being obtuse.
He huffs, annoyed at the conversation topic. “Not how many,” he admits. “Just if it had been used that way. It gives off an…unpleasant feelin—Oh. Hey, now.”
You pass under an archway as you talk, and at this point a bandit attempts to pickpocket Luigi by pretending to accidentally shoulder check him as he hurries past. Unfortunately for said bandit, Luigi has intimidating reflexes. The bandit’s hand barely makes it into the back pocket of his pants when Luigi slaps his hand over it to keep him still, resulting in the reprobate getting yanked backward with misplaced inertia.
“If you’re gonna touch my ass in broad daylight, can you at least offer me a drink?” Luigi complains. “You’re gonna give me a reputation here…”
Looking horrified, the bandit jerks his hand back and skitters into an alley so quickly he trips at least twice along the way.
“Flirting with strangers makes them less likely to steal from you,” Luigi offers in place of any sane, logical reasoning, and you really wish you didn’t want to kiss him for spending the last five minutes acting absolutely unhinged.
Because this town is far too filthy to kiss anyone in, and also because even though he might not realize it you are wearing his socks, you point out, “That doesn’t work on me.”
“That’s why I said strangers.”
He brings you to a pipe, and more so than with the threat of the rolling ocean you feel as if this stunt should be aborted immediately. The look on your face does not pass inspection.
“It’s not that bad,” he tells you, exasperated. “I told you it was underground. And this was your idea.”
“And it’s a good one,” you insist, trying to convince yourself more than him. You motion toward the offending obstacle. “Go on, then. I’ll meet you there.”
He rolls his eyes at you and then hops into the pipe. You wait for a minute to pass, and then you blindly teleport the same way you did in Shiver Valley, promptly landing in a jumble of limbs on a hard stone floor.
“Do you have to warp directly on top of me?” Luigi groans, extracting his elbow from under your head and checking for bruises.
“That is how it works. My destination becomes wherever you happen to be existing at any given moment.”
“Can we get that fixed?”
You sniff. “You wish to rid yourself of my benign graces?”
In response, he shoves you off and you nearly roll down a set of stairs.
The underground isn’t at all what you expected; there is a whole other city buried underneath Rogueport, and it wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say it’s in better shape than the newer additions. The passageways are carved carefully, still solid and ornate despite the obvious signs of aging. Some of the iron fencing remains, there are small alcoves that resemble what may have been housing at some point in time, and other more complete structures that look to be either repurposed or currently occupied.
“I think we want to go this way,” Luigi says, heading down the stairs. “Mario made it sound like it’s at the bottom.”
You tear your eyes away from the ruins, with some difficulty. Did she do this? All by herself?
“This place,” you start hollowly, and Luigi turns and tilts his head.
“For someone who wanted to come here, you sure act like you don’t know a whole lot about it,” he murmurs suspiciously.
“I told you I have never been here. I only have a vague idea of the history—”
“But you know enough about the Shadow Queen to think she has something that can help us.”
—Urk. This is not how you wanted the subject broached. “I know that, before Blumiere touched it, she was the previous owner of the Dark Prognosticus,” you say carefully. “And I’ve heard that she had a massive library of stolen books that could be relevant to your plight.”
That last part is a bit misleading. You know she had a massive library, both of books and relics, many of which were too dangerous to go near. In particular, you know the witch had a grimoire. She often left it open and unattended on a lectern in said library, daring others to touch it; and that is how you knew that you absolutely under any circumstances should not even breathe in its direction.
There is no necessity, you think, to disclose to Luigi that the Shadow Queen has any sort of relation to you. In truth, she really doesn’t. She simply owned the house you grew up in, and maybe taught you a few choice spells should the need arise for you to kill someone on her behalf. You were raised mostly by her Sisters, and you dutifully referred to your caretaker as ‘Mother’ at her behest, but you would argue that doesn’t really mean anything. There was no sentimental value between the two of you; had there been, she might not have abandoned you in the Tribe of Darkness to fend for yourself.
And, anyway, she tried to take over the world and was sealed for it. There’s no reason to bring it up now.
Luigi stops at the bottom of the first staircase and gives you a hard look. About ten paces behind, you also stop, disconcerted by the sudden intensity of his eyes.
“So, you don’t know for sure,” he says flatly. “We’re not doing this.”
Cold panic flashes over your skin for a moment. “Why not? This is the best lead we’ve had—”
“You’re approaching this on a hunch.”
“It is a very good hunch!”
He folds his arms. “Sure. But it’s not like you. You don’t function on instinct, Dimentio. That’s why we argue so much.”
“Yes, well, my normal tactics aren’t working now, are they?”
“I just wanna make sure you know what you’re getting into,” he says pointedly. “This bitch traumatized my brother. That’s not easy to do.”
Anyone who goes against her is traumatized. That’s how she works. “Yes, I’ve heard it was an event. Also caused by people who had no idea what they were getting into, by the sound of it. If you met her, you would understand why even the Sun would be affected.”
He just stares at you for a moment. Then he says, incredulously, “I was here.”
You tense; Merle did not bother to mention this, and you are not sure how to feel about it. “In…in what way?” By the sound of it, it sounded like another typical Mario solo-mission.
“I was in town,” Luigi grits out. “When she was freed, I was standing in front of the inn. I felt her hideous soul, all the way from who knows how far underground. I knew she had to be a spirit, because no living body will let your soul extend that far. Mario can’t fight spirits. The only reason he could is because she took Peach’s body. I know the kind of monster we’re dealing with here—but do you?”
Saying anything else would be damning. “Do you feel her now?” you ask.
He sighs, realizing your angle. The sound echoes eerily across the spacious catacomb. “No.”
“And if you do, what will you do?”
His mouth twists, and it’s maybe the most genuinely angry you’ve seen him yet.
You continue down the steps, patting him on the shoulder as you pass by, hoping it is quick enough that he won’t feel the minute trembling of your fingers. “You will tell me, and then I will get us out. It really is that simple. And, as I said before, you can even stay here and I can go alo—”
“Were you listening to a thing I said?” he snaps, stomping after you. “I’m not letting you go in there alone. That’s the stupidest thing you’ve ever suggested. Why are you being so reckless?”
“Because murdering you to stop the end of the world would be too much of an ordeal,” you hiss, “and also perhaps it would make me a bit miserable.”
The two of you keep heading down. There is no other way to put it, really, than a steady descent. Water flows through the corridors in a maze of conduits. The smell of it is clean, meaning that whatever city stood here centuries ago still has a functioning series of aqueducts.  In places where a warp pipe crops up, Luigi gives you a pointed look before jumping down entire sections most people would have to scale or leaping across wide canals. Really, you are kind of annoyed that he dislikes you teleporting into him so much that he’s now avoiding having it become a necessity. You can feel that he’s still miffed about the situation, so you continue in silence until you reach a door that precedes a massive hall, at which point someone is blocking your way.
A Shaman with an impressive moustache stands squarely in the middle of the doorway.
“It has been mentioned to me,” he says gruffly, “that you might come this way. I didn’t believe anyone was foolish enough.”
“Merle is a tattletale, I see,” you comment, making a mental note to remind him so later.
The Shaman regards you, and then turns to Luigi, who stiffens. Apparently, Luigi reacts in the same way to all Merlons he encounters, just out of principle. “You did not come alone, at least,” admits the Shaman with some amount of chagrin, and to your relief he steps aside. All Merlons, conversely, seem to react the same way to Luigi.
Luigi pauses warily before passing through. “Will this get you in trouble?” he asks you.
“Most assuredly,” you reply, noting with surprise that this Merlon’s eyes hold the crimson glow of a Curser. A Curser being chosen as a Merlon speaks volumes for the delicate state of balance of this place. He would definitely have dragged you back up to Rogueport if you did not have an escort, you think. “Why did you think I have not been dressed for work?”
“I trust you know exactly what our cause for worry is,” Merlon calls after you severely, very deliberately regarding your cloak, and you know he was planning to fight you if he needed to. Not even if he needed to, maybe just if Luigi wasn’t here.
“Do you believe me stupid enough to turn loose a registered cataclysm?” You click your tongue, becoming annoyed at your supposed reputation with the Shaman community. It is not an unfounded fear, maybe, but there are some lines even you would never cross. “I do value my life, fortunately for you.”
Honestly, the mere suggestion of possibly encountering Mother again terrifies you. To think they assume you are here to free her is maddening.
“Why are you wearing that?” Luigi asks, always on-point when it comes to asking all the questions you never want to answer.
Conflicted, you look down at the white, hooded cloak you took from the old manor on a whim. The brilliance of the deep red diamond-shaped gem cinching it together has clouded over years of neglect. It still bears a thin crack along the beveled facets, damage from the encounter with Blumiere’s father that set this whole mess in motion.
“I did not want to bring my poncho into this dirty place,” you say instead of the myriad more-accurate reasons for wearing the wretched thing.
You have been vibrating since you got on the boat, but it is becoming harder and harder to hide it. And now, as you step down into the deepest pit of the earth under Rogueport and see the ornate door that looms toward a high ceiling, you again find yourself weighing this decision. In front of it is a platform sporting the dulled remnants of a magic circle—and if there was any hope in your mind that the Shadow Queen and Mother were not the same entity, it would be dashed now. You would recognize that style of spell anywhere.
The door, however, does not bear her markings. It more closely resembles the traditional work of Ancients, meaning that this is what the Shamans in this area are tasked with protecting. The entrance is all they have control over.
Luigi approaches the door with little fanfare and shoves it open. It creaks but gives absurdly easily for what it is supposed to be safeguarding. “I—wow,” he says. “I thought that was gonna be a lot heavier.”
You give the platform and its circle a wide berth as you join him at the entrance. For having laid dormant for a thousand years, there is no hint of dust on the elaborate, plush carpet. The ceiling remains high, and the walls decorated with glimmering sconces and stained-glass windows. The pattern of them is indistinguishable, being underground with no light to filter through, but you are sure they are the same as the ones from the house you grew up in. Everything is so familiar somehow, and you continue forward with fraught tension.
“Dimentio,” Luigi says sharply, and you nearly jump out of your skin with how his voice ricochets around the empty hall. You turn around and blink at him. His fingers flex restlessly at his side as he glances around the foyer. “Can you teleport from here?”
That is a fair worry, and you hate that you didn’t consider it. Experimentally, you pop yourself to the other side of the door and back again, finding no resistance. The fact that Luigi thought to ask, however, is unnerving you. “Do you feel something?”
“There’s just a lot of magic in here. I don’t know how to concentrate.” He grimaces. “I don’t feel her, though.”
You look back at the door, still ajar with a fair sliver of the ruins visible, a beacon of white walls casting a slant of brightness into a room whose flame sconces only create the illusion of light. A large part of you wants to lodge something into the doorway to assure that it doesn’t close and trap you inside her tomb.
Instead, you exhale shakily. “Let us be off, then.”
[]
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aspens-dragons · 2 months ago
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Off Screen Post
heat abnormal - Part Two
Content Warning(s): Post-apocalyptic themes/imagery, possession/mind control, parasitism
//If the the Pokemon Sun and Moon main story makes you uncomfortable, it is recommended that you do not read this post.
The trek to the city was met with the occasional Ultra Beast that stood in their way, but the group fended them off.
It is... almost... a relief? It’s almost a relief is to step into the shade of the city. But the atmosphere shifted the second they stepped foot onto the first road. The light of the whole place shifted from a ragged orange to an angry red. Looking above the buildings the group realized... The sun had become lit. It burned and raged and in the light of this celestial body there was... Something. Like an eclipse waiting to happen.
There is only one comment to be made about the change and it is a simple creepy... from Miguel, along with a sound of acknowledgement from the others.
To call it a city is more of a misnomer than fact... The better description would be ruin.
It is a sprawling desolate thing... But there are signs that life was once here. Just as there were clumsy chalk drawings along the walls of Daedalus' labyrinth, put there by a barely grown beast... There are signs that children once called these streets their playground, and there are signs that parents once watched them fondly. They pass through an alleyway where on the walls between shitty apartments, markings of heights paired with names in a language none can read  tell the group that a family once lived here.
Jaime cannot help but stop for a moment to observe a poll covered in all sorts of stickers. They range from superheros posing with their sidekick (perhaps given as a gift to a child by a doctor or a dentist for doing well), to handmade decals by some wannabe artist (did they ever get their recognition?). Some are ripped, most are faded, but they all say one thing: someone lived here.
A mom and pop storefront with a broken window reads Just mar. The rest is gone... It still screams wretchedly someone loved here.
It is devoid of life, devoid of everything, but it cannot be stripped of what was once here. In this horrible dead end, the sun burns and burns and burns and the alleyways lead to nowhere and the shadows never move and the city is gone and it's gone and it's gone and everything is wrong with this goddamn aching wound of a world and...
In the light of the fury of Sol, Solis, G2V, The Sun, there is a figure, like something holy clothed in the unholy. A boy hanging by some incandescent noose, some suffocating gelatinous mass.
A boy named Aspen.
He gazes down at them with an expression they cannot pinpoint.
He is so high up that the sun swallows him. A white and orange creature, resembling origami, floats nearby. Has it provided him good company? Has anybody provided him good company?
The sight is almost beautiful. This crimson, rotting thing that surrounds him. The color of his own blood haloing him. There is something utterly divine... But his eyes are too dead for that.
Someone lives here. He was once your friend. Is he anymore?
"Who...?"
It's quiet. It's so quiet in my mind. It's nice? It's nice.  As his eyes focus, his gaze sharpens just barely. 
There are little people below. 
They're so small.
...Do they matter? Should they matter?
They're so small.
They are small. Why would something so small matter?
They don't matter, do they? And I don't matter to them, do I?
"I don't," comes Aspen's faint, unintelligible murmur.
Despite that, he wants to go down, to float closer.
Something pinches his neck. A bittersweet taste floods his mouth.
It floats closer, and it takes him with it.
The Beast, the Amalgamation freezes at the sight. It wants to snarl, it wants to kill. It can taste the blood and dust in the air, it can taste the poison they breathe, it can taste the Infection as it draws closer, the saccharine bitterness growing stronger with every inch. This is it's purpose, and yet it's blood sublimates within it's veins, ichor and ether pulsing in place as rage and anger give way to a chilling dread, not at the Infection, but at what lies in it's clutches--at whose veins it runs through.
It freezes at the sight of the boy–it’s boy.
Jaime slowly shifts off of his Cyclizar's back, breath caught in his throat. The emotions that flood him are a paradox, contrary to one another. The relief in his heart and the fear in his bones. The adrenaline in his veins and the ice in his feet.
"Aspen?" He croaks out.
Is that me?
No.
Then who is that?
Nobody who matters.
I think that's me.
His mouth opens, only for his eyes to widen, pain surging through his expression. His eyes glaze over, growing impossibly more numb as they pass over them. Sound still comes from his cracked, near bleeding lips, his voice hoarse like it hadn't been used in weeks- no, months. A word comes to him suddenly; for a moment, life flickers in his eyes and he looks almost... angry.
"Ja-?"
He winces, gasping out in pain again, his neck contorting backwards almost unnaturally. A moment later, his eyes close, and then they open. Aspen gazes down at them, his expression blank, and almost blissful.
"Who are you?"
He sounds more tired than relaxed.
The muscles in Jaime's mouth fall numb as every vein in his body grows cold with helplessness. He bites his tongue to keep himself from ceaselessly begging and pleading with Aspen to remember, to try and remind him of everything they've said and done together. It's the effects of the Nihilego venom, he knows... but it still feels like a pierce to the heart. After all, the worst thing that a Velasco can be is forgotten.
Miguel pushes their way past. "WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN WHO IS THIS?" They motion at Jaime.
"Bozo, it's your fuckin boyfriend!"
Aspen’s expression twitches ever so slightly.
"Oh," he says, absentmindedly, like he isn't processing a word they're saying. Probably because he isn't.
They want to take me. They want to make me hurt again. Aspen frowns.
"I'm not leaving. Get out."
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Maple blinks at Aspen, thinks for a moment, before sitting down on the floor. She tries very hard to not think about the fact that there is a non-zero chance the dust she's sitting in is bone shards.
"I'm not leaving until you leave."
Victoria narrows her eyes at Maple and Miguel. Idiots, the both of them. She could practically feel Miguel's eagerness to leap into combat without another word, itching to throw the first punch and escalate the situation. And Maple's first thought to protest against Aspen's refusal to leave was to make herself a literal sitting duck.
With a scoff, she turns her gaze upwards towards the possessed Aspen looming above, trying to push her way into his mind. But all she could hear was a quiet, low frequency hum. Trace flashes of feelings too nondescript to discern. The sounds of a mind more Pokemon than man. Hm. That is... not ideal.
Raising her voice to him, she asks, "What is there for you here, Sharma?"
The boy’s expression wavers, just barely.
What is there for me here-?
They just want to hurt me. They want to steal me, to hurt me again.
"Shut up," he says quietly. He sounds distinctly unlike himself and doesn't wait for an answer before he repeats, "Shut up!"
His expression is remarkably unremarkable.
"I'm not going."
Esper tilts her head, her blindfolded gaze staring straight ahead rather than up at Aspen as she shifted in Dash's saddle. Her voice is quiet as she speaks, "He sounds off..."
"Yeah. You're right. He does," Miguel rolls their shoulder, and then raises their voice, "ASPEN, I GOT 3 QUESTIONS FOR YOU."
They begin taking their feet out of the stirrups. 
"1.) WHO ARE YOU."
They start rising up in their seat, starting to stand upon their saddle. They've practiced riding Celcity while standing, racing is a form of showmanship afterall. 
"2.) WHAT DOES LOVE MEAN TO YOU IN THIS WRETCHED WORLD," They balance on the saddle and open their arms wide, a miniaturized Poke Ball held between their index and middle fingers in each hand, "AND 3.) HOW FAR ARE YOU WILLING TO GO FOR THIS FARSE."
In a slight of hand movement they expand the pokeball in their right hand and chuck it at Aspen, sending it straight at him.
Hanging from the gelatin, he barely reacts at the Poke Ball. He flinches at the sound of Miguel's voice, but doesn't even speak; a pained wince on his face is all the reaction he gives before it suddenly falls, and is replaced by a scowl.
Loud...
Too loud.
The gelatin moves but Aspen doesn't; if anything, he looks almost limp while the tentacle swats Miguel's Poke Ball away.
"What," comes Aspen's voice, growing increasingly distorted, "is your problem? Just leave!"
"What isn't my problem?" Maple doesn't move from her spot on the ground, crossing her arms, "I'm not leaving until you leave with me! Either you leave, or I annoy the shit out of you until I die, and I know everyone else here feels the same way!"
Though she did not speak, Esper softly nodded; Victoria simply tilted her head at Aspen. It is unclear whether this was her agreeing with Maple or not. Miguel seems a bit annoyed that no one even appreciated their dramatics. Whatever.
Jaime throws a nod in Maple's direction, then turns back to Aspen with a fierce, desperate look.
"We're not giving up on you, Aspen."
The sound of the Poke Ball hitting the ground is deafening in the silence that follows Jaime’s declaration; a quiet ‘pop’ comes, before the intense, bloodthirsty screech of a Scyther signals Reapwing’s release.
The boy hangs limp in the Infection’s grasp. Six limbs hold six Poke Balls.
The battle begins.
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chevyslate158 · 24 days ago
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Threads Of Freedom 15th Hunger Games AU Archer Brown x Fem!Reader: Chapter 5 - The Devil’s Bargain
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A/N: I hope you enjoy the 5th chapter of Threads of Freedom—a 15th Hunger Games AU featuring Archer Brown x Fem!Reader! 🙌 In this chapter, Coriolanus Snow finally makes his grand appearance, and trust me, his presence is not going to make things any easier for our protagonist. 😈 Prepare for more tension, manipulation, and control as he takes centre stage in this chapter. I spent way too much time stressing over trying to come up with a cover for this chapter, but in the end, I decided to create my own quotes for it instead for Coriolanus 🤷‍♀️.
I can't wait for you to see how the story continues on—more twists are on the way. 💥 There will be another post in just a few hours or less, so stay tuned with a brand new AU being introduced for Billy the Kid... A Gladiator AU 🏛️💔. So stay tuned for more!👀
As always, thank you so much for reading and supporting me! 💖
Word Count: 5.5K
Warnings: Dark themes, control, abuse of power, intimidation, threats, manipulation, mentions of hanging, obsession, Coriolanus being Coriolanus, objectification, isolation, intimidation, possessiveness, coercion, dehumanisation, peacekeeper brutality, threats of violence, and grief.
As they led me through the darkened streets, the path to the Peacekeeper base felt endless. The streets were quieter than usual, the usual hum of District 12 silenced by the heavy air of tension. The flickering lights along the way cast distorted shadows, but it wasn’t the shadows that unsettled me, it was the Peacekeepers’ firm grip on my arms, their booted feet echoing with an unforgiving cadence on the cobblestones. My mind raced with frantic thoughts, trying desperately to keep my panic from surfacing. I had to remain calm. If they saw any hint of fear, it would only make things worse. I couldn’t afford to show them that I was scared, that I was about to crack under the weight of everything threatening to overwhelm me.
The sky above was cloaked in a thick blanket of clouds, the morning air unusually still, suffocating even. The darkness pressed in on me like a physical force, making it harder to breathe, and harder to think. 
We walked past the hanging tree. Its gnarled branches twisted like skeletal fingers, reaching toward the sky as if trying to escape the earth below or the district itself. The shadows it cast stretched long and unnaturally, dark tendrils creeping toward me. My throat tightened, and I swallowed hard, the weight of fear pressing down on me. The tree loomed like a silent witness to all the pain that had passed beneath it, its very presence a reminder of the Capitol’s unyielding control over us nooses hung along the main thickest branches.
The whispers of those who had met their end there seemed to echo in my mind. I could almost feel their souls lingering, the weight of their deaths heavy in the air. The tree mocked me, its presence a stark reminder of how little power we truly had. I tried to focus on my steps, but the fear bubbling inside me made it difficult to move. What if I didn’t make it out of this? What if the Peacekeepers didn’t believe my lies? The thought of being lost, forgotten, swallowed by that tree, made my stomach churn.
I forced myself to keep walking, my feet carrying me further from the tree, but its shadow remained, a silent reminder of the dangers that surrounded me. It felt as though my dreams of escaping, of freedom, were slipping further away with every step.
I swallowed harshly, trying to hold myself together. The sight of that damn tree of everything it represented was almost too much to bear. It was as though the air around me was thick with loss, and it weighed heavily on my chest. My thoughts turned to my father, and the way his health had worsened over the last few weeks, how he was now suffering from the same illness that had claimed my mother. The realization made my heart ache in a way I couldn’t put into words.
Regret gnawed at me like a slow poison. Why hadn’t I done more for him? Why hadn’t I spent more time easing his burdens, helping him carry the weight he’d been carrying for so long? I could have tried harder, I should have tried harder. Instead, I let myself get caught up in my own selfish dreams, the longing to escape, to leave District 12 and find something more. But I should have been here, by his side, making every moment count before it was too late. How could I have let myself get lost in my own desires, knowing how fragile he was? Now, the reality of his illness felt like a cruel reminder of the fleeting nature of time, and the more I thought about it, the harder it became to breathe.
The weight of my regrets settled heavily in my chest, a dull ache that only grew deeper with every step toward the base. The silence between the Peacekeepers felt suffocating as if the very air was pressing in on me, making it hard to breathe. I couldn’t help but think of Annie, her bright smile, and the laughter we shared that seemed so far away now. I longed for more moments with her, moments I had taken for granted. I wished I could turn back time, walk with her to the Hob like I used to, just to be near her, to enjoy the simplicity of our friendship. Instead, I had been so consumed with my desire to escape, to flee this painful place, that I had pushed her away without even realizing it. The time I could have spent with her now felt like a lifetime lost.
I regretted fighting with Archer—more than I cared to admit. Regretted the harsh words I’d thrown at him, the way I’d shut him out when all he wanted was to understand. I could still feel the weight of our last conversation, the anger and hurt hanging between us like a wall I couldn't tear down. I hadn’t given him a chance to explain, too wrapped up in my own frustrations to see what he was really trying to say. I had wanted to leave—wanted to escape this place and the suffocating weight of my life in District 12—but now, as I walked through the cold streets, it felt like those dreams were slipping away, dissolving into the night like smoke. The more the distance between me and the hanging tree grew, the more it seemed like I was running away from everything I wanted, everything I needed.
A part of me just wanted to turn around, run back, and throw myself into his arms. I wanted to feel safe again, to feel like I wasn’t carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders. I wanted to stay there, in the warmth of his embrace, and let everything else fade away. Because, if I was honest with myself, I cared about him more than I had ever let on. More than I had allowed myself to admit. He had become such a quiet constant in my life, someone who understood me in ways no one else could. And now, with the possibility of losing him hanging over me, I realized just how much he meant to me. How much I needed him.
In my heart, I knew that if I could just find the courage to go back to him, to apologize, maybe things could be different. Maybe we could have a chance at something more than just the unspoken tension that had started to build between us. But as I walked further away, my steps growing heavier, the idea of turning back seemed impossible stupid even. I had always wanted to leave District 12 behind, to run away and start fresh. But now, as I thought about him, I realized the truth—I didn’t just want to escape my life here. I wanted to escape with him; it was something I had to do. I wanted to build a life where the weight of the Capitol and the fear of the Games didn’t hang over us. And if I didn’t have him with me, then all those dreams of freedom felt hollow.
I had been so focused on the idea of escaping, but now, I couldn’t help but wonder if the only thing worth running toward was him.
I glanced up at the sky, the clouds thick and oppressive, and for a moment, I thought I saw the faintest hint of light breaking through, only for it to vanish as quickly as it appeared. The sunlight that was supposed to come with the morning was lost, swallowed by the swarm of clouds. It felt like a cruel joke, the dark clouds mocking my desire for freedom. It felt like everything I had dreamed of—everything I had hoped for—was fading away with the light. I had been foolish to think I could ever escape this place in the beginning.
"Get moving," one of the Peacekeepers barked, his harsh voice cutting through the whirlwind of my spiraling thoughts. His tone left no room for argument, and I nodded silently, biting down hard on my lip to keep the tears from spilling over. I couldn’t let them see me break not now, not when they were looking for any sign of weakness. Every step forward felt like it dragged me closer to my doom, and no matter how hard I tried, the knot of fear in my stomach only tightened.
The base loomed ahead, a towering, angular structure carved out of stone and iron. It seemed to absorb the faint light from the sky above, leaving it cold and lifeless. It wasn’t just a building; it was a warning, a reminder of the Capitol’s grip on us all. As the Peacekeepers marched me forward, their boots echoing against the cobblestones, I tried to steady my breathing. But with each step, the weight of my situation pressed harder on my chest.
Inside, the air shifted cool and sterile, with a faint metallic tang that reminded me of blood. The doors slammed shut behind me, the sound reverberating like a final verdict. The halls were dimly lit by flickering fluorescent lights that buzzed faintly overhead, casting uneven shadows that seemed to move as if alive. The stone walls were damp in places, their surfaces scarred and worn as if they had witnessed countless horrors over the years. The further we went, the quieter the world seemed to become, the hum of machinery and muffled voices creating an eerie backdrop that only added to my unease.
As I was dragged further inside the building, I noticed the Peacekeepers stationed throughout the halls. Some glanced at me with open disdain, their expressions twisted in disgust as if I were something foul that had wandered in from the seams. Their cold, judgmental eyes felt like a weight pressing against my chest. Others, however, looked at me differently, their gazes predatory and hungry. Their eyes raked over me as though I were something to be devoured, their smirks unsettling and dripping with malice. I swallowed hard, my heart pounding in my chest. The air grew heavier with each step, my stomach twisting with the realization that I was utterly alone here, a lamb among wolves.
I passed rows of heavy iron doors, each one marked with a number but no other indication of what lay behind it. From some, I heard faint sounds shuffling, the scrape of chains, or worse, muffled cries that sent a chill straight to my bones. The oppressive silence of the other doors felt even more sinister, as if they were holding their breath, waiting for something unspeakable to unfold.
"Move it," one of the Peacekeepers snapped, giving me a rough shove. I stumbled, barely catching myself before I hit the ground, and the cold sting of humiliation burned at the edges of my fear accompanied by the sting in my palms and cheek. I wanted to lash out but the icy knot in my throat made speaking impossible.
When we finally reached the end of the corridor, they pushed open a heavy door, its groan echoing like a death knell. The room inside was stark and barren, the walls a harsh, sterile white that seemed to amplify every sound. A metal table stood in the center, flanked by two cold, unwelcoming chairs. The surface of the table was scratched and worn, a silent testament to the countless people who had sat here before me, all of them helpless in the face of whatever judgment awaited.
They shoved me into the room, and I stumbled again, my legs trembling beneath me as though they were about to give out. My wrists were cuffed tightly to one another, the metal biting into my skin as I sank down into the creaky wooden chair, unable to stop my body from shaking. The air was thick, heavy with tension, and every breath felt like it dragged through my lungs. The silence in the room was absolute, broken only by the faint echo of my own unsteady breathing.
The walls seemed to press closer, enclosing me in a space that felt too small, too suffocating. My mind raced with the endless possibilities of what they might ask, of what they might do if my answers didn’t satisfy them. This wasn’t just a questioning; it was a reckoning. And as I sat there, staring at the scratched surface of the table, I knew there was no running from it. No escape. This was the moment when everything would change, and I couldn’t tell if I’d be able to survive it.
I tried to steady my breathing, forcing myself to think clearly. I had to prepare. Whatever was coming, whatever questions they hurled at me, I couldn’t falter. The truth wasn’t an option. I'd been at the mines late at night, trying to find a way out of this godforsaken district, and if they found out, my fate would be sealed. The hanging tree loomed in the back of my mind, its gnarled branches like fingers curling around my thoughts, threatening to drag me to my end.
I had to lie. I had to convince them I wasn’t the one sneaking around. Every story I told as a child to escape punishment, every excuse I made to avoid suspicion, it had all led to this moment. Now, my survival depended on how well I could spin my tale. My heart hammered as I rehearsed what I’d say, the excuses I’d give, the innocent look I’d force onto my face. I needed to seem frightened but not guilty, confused but not suspicious.
Lying was my only chance to walk out of here alive. I couldn’t let my nerves betray me, couldn’t let my voice shake or my eyes darted around like I had something to hide. The Peacekeepers weren’t stupid they’d see through anything less than perfection. If I wanted to avoid swinging at the end of a rope, I needed to act like I had nothing to hide. I clenched my fists at my sides, my nails biting into my palms as I forced myself to focus.
This was it. My life depended on the story I’d weave in the next few moments. If I failed, the hanging tree would be waiting.
The metallic clang of the door opening made me jolt, my back snapping straight against the cold chair. I’d expected another Peacekeeper to barge in, maybe someone gruffer, someone who would demand answers with brute force. But the figure who stepped into the room was entirely different.
He carried himself with an air of authority that seemed to suck the oxygen out of the room. Every movement was deliberate, commanding attention without a word. He stood tall, well over six feet, his broad shoulders and lean frame exuding power. His iconic blood-red suit clung to him like it was made for no one else, the fabric pristine and untouched by the dirt of District 12. The color, so vivid and striking, seemed to symbolize both danger and dominance, as if he wore it to remind everyone of his control over their lives.
His blonde hair was slicked back meticulously, not a strand out of place, and his pale blue eyes—cold and calculating—locked onto mine with an intensity that made my skin crawl. I couldn’t tear my eyes away, caught in the quiet storm that was his gaze. It was unnerving, like a predator locking onto its prey. The sharp, almost clinical precision with which he studied me made me feel as though he were dissecting me, not just physically, but mentally and emotionally.
I knew who he was. Everyone knew who he was. His reputation had preceded him, as it did with everyone in the Capitol who wielded that kind of power. The mere mention of his name sent shivers down the spine of even the most hardened rebels. President Coriolanus Snow. The embodiment of fear, control, and manipulation. But seeing him here, in the flesh, was something else entirely.
And now, here he was, in front of me, like a storm closing in.
For a moment, I couldn’t move, couldn’t even breathe. My body felt frozen, as if the air itself had turned to ice around me. 
Why was he here? 
The president of Panem, in this forgotten, crumbling district? It didn’t make sense. My mind scrambled for answers, each thought colliding with the next in a tangle of fear and confusion. This wasn’t some routine interrogation. It wasn’t about the mines, the Peacekeepers, or even the Capitol’s grip tightening around District 12.
Could it be about me?
The realization struck me like a blow, stealing what little composure I had left. But why? What could I have done to warrant his presence? The weight of his cold, assessing gaze made my skin crawl, and my heart pounded so hard I was sure he could hear it. I felt exposed, like every secret I had ever held was laid bare before him. My attempt to flee, my fight with Archer, even the forbidden dreams I kept hidden in the darkest corners of my mind—it was as if he already knew.
Panic twisted inside me, but so did an unsettling sense of curiosity. Of all the people in District 12, why had Coriolanus Snow chosen to face me personally? What did he see when he looked at me? And why did it feel as though he wasn’t here to deliver justice but something far more sinister, far more personal?
“Leave us,” Snow ordered sharply, his voice smooth and cutting all at once, like the edge of a finely honed blade. It wasn’t loud, but it didn’t need to be; the authority in his tone was absolute. The two Peacekeepers flanking the door exchanged uncertain glances, their hesitation lasting only a fraction of a second before they stepped out, boots echoing faintly as they retreated.
The door closed behind them with a final, resounding thud that reverberated through the small room, sealing us in together. The silence that followed was deafening, pressing down on me like a physical weight. The absence of sound seemed to amplify everything else: the faint ticking of a clock somewhere in the distance, the soft rustle of his blood red coat as he adjusted his stance, the steady rhythm of my own heartbeat pounding in my ears.
Snow’s gaze lingered on me, his eyes dark and intent, studying me with a look that made my skin prickle uncomfortably. His lips curved into a faint, predatory smile, one that didn’t reach his eyes, but somehow made the air feel heavier. Every movement he made was deliberate, calculated, as if he were savoring the moment.
He stepped further into the room, the soft click of his boots on the floor echoing with each measured step, his presence filling the space. It was as if time slowed down in his wake. He was in control of the room, of the situation, of me. He pulled out the chair across from me with deliberate care, the scraping sound of it against the floor loud in the stillness. As he sat, he folded his hands neatly on the table, his fingers interlocking with practiced precision. The way he settled into the chair was almost unnerving, as if he had done this a thousand times before, as if he had all the time in the world to break me down.
“Well,” he began, his voice smooth, like velvet wrapped around steel, every word dripping with an unsettling calm. “It seems we find ourselves in quite the predicament, don’t we?” His eyes never left mine, and there was something about the way he spoke—too measured, too controlled—that made my stomach churn.
I swallowed hard, the sound echoing in the silence between us, and tried to maintain some semblance of composure. But the weight of his gaze pressed down on me like a physical force, making it impossible to feel anything but exposed. Every inch of my skin felt like it was on fire under his scrutiny.
“Do you know why you’re here?” he asked, tilting his head slightly, his expression almost too calm, too patient. It was as if he were savoring the moment, playing some game with me I didn’t understand. He looked at me with genuine curiosity, as though he truly wanted to know what was going on in my mind.
I opened my mouth to speak, but my voice caught in my throat. My breath hitched, and I could feel the panic starting to rise, but I fought to keep it in check. He raised a single brow, as though waiting for me to speak.
“I—I’m not sure,” I finally managed, my voice barely above a whisper, the words feeling foreign and weak on my tongue. The vulnerability of it hit me all at once, and I immediately regretted saying anything at all.
“Not sure?” Snow leaned back in his chair, his posture relaxed, but there was nothing casual about the sharp intensity in his eyes. His gaze never left me, as if he could see right through me. “You were seen near the mines last night. A curious place for a girl like you to be wandering about, wouldn’t you say?”
I could feel the pressure building in my chest, but I forced myself to speak with as much confidence as I could muster. “I wasn’t near the mines,” I lied quickly, the words slipping out before I could even think. My heart pounded so loud I was sure he could hear it, but I couldn’t let him see how much he rattled me. “I was at home. Asleep.”
A soft chuckle escaped him, low and smooth, though it lacked even the smallest hint of warmth. His lips twisted into a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes, and the sound of it sent a shiver down my spine. “Asleep, you say?” He leaned forward then, his movements deliberate and slow, as if he were savoring the moment. His elbows came to rest on the table, and his fingers laced together, the tension in his posture making it clear he wasn’t buying my lie. “You don’t strike me as a very good liar, Y/n. But perhaps I’m wrong.”
The way he said my name sent an icy tremor through me. It was too familiar, too personal. My mind raced, trying to process how he knew it, why he knew it. It felt like an intrusion, like he had already dissected every detail of my life and was now toying with me, pulling at the threads to see how much I could unravel before I broke.
Snow studied me for a moment, his gaze sharp and calculating, as if he were weighing something far beyond the surface of our conversation. He didn’t speak immediately, allowing the silence to stretch, thick and suffocating, like a game he was letting me lose without ever needing to make a move.
Finally, he spoke, but the words came out slowly, almost as if he were choosing them with great care. "You intrigue me," he murmured, his voice softer, but it was no comfort. There was a subtle undercurrent to his words, like a predator circling its prey, and I felt every inch of that tension. “You remind me of someone... someone I once knew.”
His words hung in the air, and my pulse quickened as I tried to make sense of them. I stayed silent, unwilling to give him anything more than what he already had. The tension between us stretched, taut as a wire, and for a brief, terrifying moment, I thought he might break it with something that would shatter me completely.
"She was special, but no more than a means to an end," he continued, but this time, there was a flicker in his expression—something fleeting, almost disgusted, as though the thought of this 'someone' that repulsed him. The change was subtle but unmistakable like a shadow crossing his face. “But she lacked something. Something... I believe you so happen to possess.”
I felt a chill wash over me, and my stomach twisted in knots. I didn’t want to know what he meant, didn’t want to hear the unspoken things behind his words. But even as I refused to respond, I could feel his eyes on me—measuring, calculating, dissecting me in ways I couldn’t begin to understand. Whatever it was he saw in me, I wasn’t sure I wanted to know.
“You have potential,” Snow said, his voice smooth and coaxing, though his eyes narrowed slightly, studying me like a puzzle he was just about to solve. “But potential means nothing without control. Without loyalty.” He paused, letting the words linger in the air as if they were meant to sink into my bones.
I swallowed, trying to push down the knot of fear tightening in my chest. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said, my voice steady, though I could feel the lie slipping from my tongue.
“Oh, but you do,” he replied, his smile widening, the corners of his mouth curling into something dark and knowing. He leaned in slightly, and the air between us seemed to thicken with each word. “You see, I don’t believe in coincidences. A girl like you, sneaking around the mines, dreaming of freedom…” His voice hardened, and the words became sharp, cutting into me. “Do you think you’re special? That you’re above the rules, above your place?”
His gaze bore into mine, demanding an answer, and I shook my head quickly, trying to swallow the panic that surged in my chest. “No, I don’t—”
“Don’t lie to me,” he interrupted his voice a blade, slicing through the quiet between us. “I can see it in your eyes. You think you’re different, don’t you? You want to escape, to run from this district, from your responsibilities. And for what? Some fleeting fantasy?” He leaned even closer, his gaze never wavering, never blinking. “What makes you think you’re entitled to more than this place? To more than the life you were given?”
The weight of his words crushed me, the reality of my situation bearing down like a vice. I could feel the tears threatening to burn behind my eyes, but I fought them back with all the strength I had left. “I’m not trying to escape,” I said, though the tremor in my voice betrayed me, revealing a crack in my carefully constructed facade.
He smiled again, but it was colder now, something calculated in the way his lips curled. “You’re lying to yourself, Y/n. And not only that you’re lying to me.” His voice dropped to a whisper, almost sweet, but it carried a chilling undertone. “I know exactly what you want. You want to be free, but more than that… you want to be wanted. To matter. You want someone to take notice, to see you for more than the girl who has her head up in the clouds and whos nothing but a dreamer.”
The words hit harder than I expected, and I tried to push them away, but they stuck, digging into my mind like sharp needles. My heart pounded, each beat echoing in my ears, and I could feel the walls of the room closing in around me. “That’s not true,” I whispered, barely able to find the words to defend myself.
“Oh, but it is,” Snow countered, his voice low and smooth, as if he were speaking a truth only he could understand. “You’re searching for something bigger than yourself. You dream of escaping, but not just the district. You want someone to take you out of this life, to pull you away from all this... mediocrity. But here’s the problem, Y/n…” He leaned in even closer, his face inches from mine, the intensity of his cerulean gaze trapping me. “You’ll never be truly free, because you can’t even control yourself. You can’t control your desires and your impulses. And that—” He tapped the side of my head lightly, a mocking gesture that made my stomach twist. “—is where you fail.”
I felt like I was drowning in the weight of his words, each one heavier than the last. He was breaking me down, piece by piece, and yet I couldn't find the strength to fight back.
Snow leaned even closer, his face now mere inches from mine. “Do you know what happens to those who try to defy the Capitol?” he asked, his voice low and chilling. “They end up swinging from that tree you passed on your way here. Do you want that to be your fate, Y/n?”
I shook my head again, swallowing the lump in my throat.
I tried to stay calm, to keep my composure, but his presence was suffocating. He leaned in even closer, his gaze intense, as if he were reading me, dissecting my every reaction. His eyes flicked to my hands, still trembling slightly on the table, before meeting my gaze again. Snow’s lips curled into a twisted smile, his eyes glinting with amusement and malice. He leaned forward again, his voice lowering to a taunting, almost mocking tone.
“Now, tell me, Y/n," he said, his words dripping with disdain, "Were you out last night, snooping around the mines, sneaking along the district fence like a pathetic little bunny, desperate to escape your cage?”
He paused, letting the insult hang in the air, his gaze never leaving mine. The words stung like a slap to the face, and I couldn’t help but flinch, but I held my ground, refusing to give him the full satisfaction of seeing me break.
“And don’t you dare lie to me,” he said, his voice low and quiet, almost too calm. “You were near the mines last night, and I know you weren’t there just for a stroll.” He let the silence hang between us, each second feeling like it dragged on forever. “But I’m not here to accuse you—no. I’m here to offer you a choice.”
My heart skipped a beat. A choice?
He stood, circling me like a predator with no rush, savouring the moment. “You see, Y/n, you could walk out of here today, and pretend like none of this ever happened. But if you dare try to escape again, if you dare think you can run from this district...” He leaned in closer, his breath cold on my ear. “I will personally make sure your father’s neck is snapped, your friends are dragged into the dirt, and as for that lover boy of yours,” he spat the words with disgust, as though the mere mention of his name left a bitter taste in his mouth, “Archer? Do you think he’s your protector? I’ll have him begging for mercy, just like the fool he is.”
He paused, his eyes narrowing as if searching for any sign of weakness. “I won’t be made a fool again by some silly district girl. You’ll stay in your place. Don’t think for a second that you have any real power here. I control everything. Everything.”
I shook my head, trying to hold back the tears, trying to swallow the lump in my throat that threatened to choke me. The weight of his threats hung in the air like a thick fog. I wasn’t sure if he truly meant every word or if this was just part of his game. But it didn’t matter. His eyes, his tone—everything about him screamed that he was in control, and he would make good on his promises if I dared to defy him.
“Good,” he said finally, his smile returning, though it was darker, more sinister than before. It made my stomach churn. “Because I think you could be...useful to me. If you prove yourself.”
I didn’t trust him. I couldn’t. But I had no choice. He was holding all the cards. I had to play along, had to pretend I was on his side, just long enough to stay alive.
“What do you want from me?” I asked, my voice trembling despite my best efforts to keep it steady.
He didn’t hesitate, his response sharp and cold. “Loyalty,” he said simply, as though it was the most obvious thing in the world. “And obedience. You’ll find that I reward those who know their place. But cross me, and you’ll wish you hadn’t.”
I nodded, the weight of his words sinking into my chest like lead. My body screamed at me to run, but my mind screamed louder—if I did, everything I loved would be destroyed. Archer... my father... Annie... all of them. I had no choice but to obey, for now.
“Good,” Snow said again, his voice almost pleased as he straightened his uniform. “Then we’ll see what you’re truly made of.”
He turned to leave, and the door opened as the Peacekeepers stepped back in, their expressions as cold and indifferent as always. Snow paused in the doorway, his hand on the handle. He glanced over his shoulder, his eyes locking with mine one last time.
“Oh, and Y/n?” he called out casually, his tone deceptively light. “Remember, I’ll be watching.” The door slammed shut behind him, and I was left alone in the cold, suffocating silence of the room. His presence lingered in the air like a thick, poisonous fog, and the sound of his voice echoed in my head. He had made his intentions clear. This wasn’t just about interrogation. He wanted me. He needed me under his control, and if I was going to survive, I would have to play his game if I wanted a sliver of a chance of leaving this hellhole.
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