I just push everyone away.. I should've died a long time ago.
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Please give me one reason not to push everyone ik and never speak again, I'm so fucking close
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the difference between karkat and kankri when it comes to their shared aspect of blood is that karkat, as a knight, will protect and cultivate the bonds between his friends and will form connections with others easily due to his empathetic nature, even if said others are fucked up people in the eyes of others (see: his whole deal with spades slick, the way he formed moriallegience with rampaging gamzee), people naturally come into his orbit, meanwhile kankri being a seer doesnt want to create a connection between himself and others, but he wants to understand and study how those bonds work between people, basically looking outside in on the relationships and forming a list of do's and dont's when it comes to cultivating that connection
in other words, karkats that one motherfucker at the party whos somehow friends with everyone here, no matter their background, and everyone fucking loves that foul-mouthed guy, meanwhile kankri is standing in the corner like a creep and nobody knows exactly what his deal is but he knows what everyones deal is and somehow has knowledge of all of partygoers dirty laundry, even if theyve never seen him in their fucking life
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thinking about the wire and how julian wouldnt let garak go for any reason. garak lies (of course he lies that's what he does), he becomes rude and aggressive, he makes up stories to purposefully make himself despicable in julians eyes (although to be fair he has done *things*), he insults julian personally he even physically attacks him. julian doesnt faulter. when garak tells the doctor hes an addict julian only looks at him with compassion, which of course garak hates, but in the end there is nothing he can do to get this stupidly stubborn gorgeous fucking doctor away from him.
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Listen, I am aromantic, but it's getting cold and dark and I so desperately want somebody who I can cuddle under my covers with, somebody I can teach to dance, somebody I can drag outside at night when we're supposed to be inside, and it's so cold that it could start snowing any minute, or maybe already be snowing, and then we would go and sit in the dark at the lake with the lights while listening to Taylor Swift and sharing my headphones, and then dancing around outside to mirrorball and not caring who sees us because we are so madly platonically in love with each other that we only care about the other. I want somebody to drag around charity shops while I plan my Halloween costume, and my birthday outfit, and the outfit for the various Christmas parties I will take them too- even the one hosted by the church that I usually end up just sitting in a side room watching whatever Nativity movie they put on for the entire time. The kids would ask if we were dating, and we'd just look at each other and giggle, while my parents and grandparents who are watching us bicker over an Uno game are thinking about how pure our love is. Kisses are always an option, but never pushed for, and even if the other person liked me romantically they would be okay with and understand how I don't feel the exact same way, but I still love them so so much. Like a platonic soulmate. We would share clothes, and I'd save them a piece of my birthday cake, if they weren't already there for it. We would go on walks together, and they would be one of the first people I call when the cold weather is affecting my mood or my health, and then they would come over unprompted with something sweet and a hoodie. We would both chill on my bed, not caring about how cramped it is or the fact that my bed is a high rise so we can't sit up straight, because we don't have any trouble with being close to the other, and on days where it may be hard to be physically close to someone, they would sit back patiently and read me a chapter of whatever book we had picked up, pausing to add their own witty comments and applauding me when I guess what will happen next accurately. We wouldn't even necessarily be 'dating'- and we wouldn't label what we had as romantic, despite the dates and the kisses and the cuddles, and we'd both be fine with it. We would just exist together, in the same space, comfortably.
I want to be wanted.
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anthony, with fear and panic in his eyes: OH GOD OH NO WHERE IS MY WIFE SHE’S NOT BY MY SIDE
anthony, five seconds later: oh thank goodness. here she is.
kate: anthony, please get your hand off of my stomach
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Can you imagine lucien opening the door to his manor only to find all his belongings from the spring court dumped on his doorstep essentially signifying that tamlin really doesn’t want him coming back and that any effort to reconcile their friendship is done and gone.What he doesn’t know is that tamlin is completely internalizing all the shitty things rhys said to him about deserving to be alone for the rest of his life and this is him accepting and believing that he really does deserve to be alone,that this is his punishment and he deserves it ☹️☹️☹️.
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Me after helping my mum take my nans blood pressure
Me after taking my antidepressant pills
Me after I walk with a limp (I still haven’t gotten my hip looked at)
Me when I’m autistic
Me when I’m a sarcastic bitch for no reason
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