#predictions ... i bet she dies
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big fan of the major antagonists in crash course in romance being the scary mums whilst a b-plot position is given to the actual murderer
#crash course in romance#ramblings#haven't finished the show yet so if he's suddenly a major issue in later episodes i take this back#tbh he is a major issue now#but he gets like 15 minutes tops whilst the leads have an hour of bad and awkward decisions to make#the true villain is social ineptitude#maybe i'm saying this because i wish jang seo-jin had a larger role#she's such an interesting character#the way she did not learn from her mistakes. tragic#predictions ... i bet she dies#sun-jae's brother kills her i will bet money on it#can't remember his name#lee hui-jae there we go#although have i ever successfully predicted a major plot point in this show. i have not#who possibly could
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ok so since mizi is out of the game now... my guess for who dies in the ivan vs till round is now ivan, if anyone. theres a chance no one dies w how things are going rn but... ivan's arc is about till, but till's is about mizi. ivan can conclude his arc in this round, but till cant. so i think the more likely one to die is ivan. and either way i think till is going to somehow find mizi down the line
#alien stage#was thinking abt it again#when i made the prediction that ivan would live last time i was betting it on mizi going onto the finals#thus both of them having arcs centered around losing the person they love#and ivan maybe taking it out on mizi to some extreme. be it misplaced grief or something like that#so his arc would still be abt till in the same way mizi's is still abt sua#and i mean it would still be like that even if till dies next round. i can still see that#but w how last round ended i feel like a till/mizi reunion is more likely#tho i can still see the drama of it being ivan who meets her again. maybe hed be angry at her bc till thought she died#which made him lose hope? or something. and then he died#but the way i see it now. i can see ivan throwing himself under the bus#but its possible something happens to disrupt the game again and they both live!
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Just found out today that my dad predicted my adult height and managed to get within 1 centimetre of what it would actually be 🥹
#this is especially poignant because he never saw me as an adult. he died when i was 11#my mum met a chonky baby and was like ‘i bet you were bigger’ and was going through my baby book trying to find my weight at same age#(i was bigger but that’s not the point)#she found an algorithm in my dad’s handwriting which was him attempting to estimate my adult height based on how big i was at 16 weeks#plus my parents’ heights plus other factors#he predicted i’d be 185cm#just measured myself. i’m 184#honestly i fluctuate between 182 and 185 depending on time of day and how i stand#but it’s UNCANNY. science is crazy. or mathematics? idk#i just feel weirdly emotional that my dad had a mental image of me as an adult and it was pretty correct#personal
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Laura and Wade father daughter relationship but the X-Men POV
Laura was new at the school and had caught a lot of people's attention. She was their late Logan's daughter which alone got her a lot of attention. Then add in how good she was at fighting? Well lots of people had been interested.
She was behind on schooling because of her life and subsequent time in the void. She had made it clear that was the only reason she was there in the first place. She would have gone anywhere else but the mansion was the safest bet for many reasons.
She had control over her powers sure but not so much her instincts. She was to put it nicely.....rabid.
Now most of the time she was fine if not slightly off-putting but other times it was bad. She was far worse then Logan ever was and they had to wonder if this is what Logan was like when he was younger.
She didn't have a handle on her instincts in the way he had and it was night and day comparing the two. Small thing set her off be that quick movement that triggered either growling or a prey drive. The growling and snarling was one thing, but the prey drive was a complete other.
Every time it had been triggered so far she had snapped herself out of it quickly but it still worried the others.
One day however had seemingly changed it all. Deadpool was at the mansion. Now usually you could run him off relatively easily however it was getting harder and harder to do that.
He had been sticking around Laura and thanks to eavesdropping it became clear why. He had (somehow) got himself into a parental role with her. Everyone had been dubious at that to say the least.
It was one of the days Deadpool had been hanging about when Laura had her prey drive activated. The difference was this time she didn't snap out of it. Needless to say they were all spooked because no one was sure what to do.
Surprisingly they didn't need to worry because Deadpool had appeared out of seemingly nowhere, took in the situation and laughed. "Look at the scary kitten." He crooned.
He then got her attention and started slowly backing away with a visible smile under the mask. "That's right Kit hunt me the experienced Wolverine ranger instead." He cooed.
The others watched on in shock as Deadpool slowly brought Laura away from everyone before turning on his heel and sprinting to a door that led outside. Laura gave chase a moment later claws unceiving as the launched herself after him.
The others followed after unable to sate their curiosity. Deadpool was in the back courtyard dodging away from Laura lunging at him. He was quite and seemingly able to predict her attacks all while he laughed.
Eventually she snagged him and managed to grapple him to the ground claws sinking into his chest pinning him to the ground. He just let it happen not putting up much of a fight. Even dramatically pretending to have died all while Laura perched atop of him.
She was panting with exertion while Deadpool just let her be. Eventually she blinked back to herself and retracted her claws. "You feel better?" Deadpool asked and it surprisingly wasn't in a joking or sarcastic tone. No he sounded genuine.
Laura huffed nodding her head before going to flop down onto him but Deadpool stopped her. "Not that I'm opposed but you don't want blood on you clothes." Laura sighed, "Your right." She grumbled getting up and offering out a hand to him.
"I usually am." Deadpool shot back easily grin audible as he took the offered hand and was pulled back up. He cupped Laura's face with a hand as he forced her to make eye contact with him.
"Laura." He said and she shrunk in on herself but Deadpool just continued, "You have got to tell us if you need to let of steam. I know you can't always help it, but you can end up hurting others. Hunting me and your Papá is fine but not everyone can play as hard as us."
Laura sighs, "I know I'm sorry I didn't realize it was getting bad." Deadpool shakes his head slightly before shaking Laura's head with his hand softly like one would do to a dog. "I know and I'm not mad promise, but now you'll have an easier time figuring out when you let off yeah?" He asked.
Laura smiled up at him, "Yeah thanks Pop." She thanks the man softly and he just pulls her into his side avoiding the blood. "Good girl now get going I know you have another class." With that he lets her go and they make their way back inside.
All the others can do with stare because when did Wade Wilson become someone with such capability to be a father? As Deadpool watched her run to make it to her next class he just shook his head fondly.
Scott couldn't help but speak, "You're... good with her." He observed. Wade just tilted his head in acknowledgment, "Sure she's not much different from kids I normally deal with." He answers easily tone...somber.
"What do you mean normally deal with?" Scott asked confused, "The kids who ordered hits I've gotten pretty good at dealing with them. Kids desperate and unsure of what to do." Deadpool answers with a shrug like the mear idea of him doing hits for kids wasn't absurd.
The group's confusion and apprehension must have been evident as he explained without being asked. "Usually not a serious as you're thinking. Abusive homes, stalkers, bullies. Things where they won't get help from any outside source that's worth a shit."
"What do you mean there are plenty of the people they can tell besides... you." The last part was tacked on with slight disgust from Jean. Deadpool turned to face her, "Yes because obviously I was their first choice. I mean why wouldn't anyone else do anything? I know I told other people when I was being beaten as a child and It definitely worked." His tone was obnoxiously upbeat and his sarcasm clear.
The others shifted awkwardly after that statement, "Lord forbid I do objectively good things and help kids out of shit situations." A beat then, "Laura never really had anyone and is worse off then most others combined. I don't completely understand but I get pretty damn close. I didn't become this beautiful for no reason after all."
The others shared glances unsure of what to say if anything. It wasn't necessary however as Deadpool continued like he always did.
"I've always wanted a kid you know?"
Dead silence.
"And what do you know I finally have one. Not made from me sure, but what does that matter? All I care about is not doing wrong by her and giving her the life she deserves."
None of the X-Men were sure how to respond to that.
(slightly changed and edited version here for AO3)
#deadclaws#deadclaw#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool & wolverine#deadpool 3#deadpool#deadpool x wolverine#wade wilson#wade x logan#logan howlett#wolverine#poolverine#laura kinney#x 23#xmen#x men#X-Men#resi's shorts#scott summers#jean grey
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on storytelling and repetition
“...the secret of the Great Stories is that they have no secrets. The Great Stories are the ones you have heard and want to hear again. The ones you can enter anywhere and inhabit comfortably. They don’t deceive you with thrills and trick endings. They don’t surprise you with the unforeseen. They are as familiar as the house you live in. Or the smell of your lover’s skin. You know how they end, yet you listen as though you don’t. In the way that although you know that one day you will die, you live as though you won’t. In the Great Stories you know who lives, who dies, who finds love, who doesn’t. And yet you want to know again.”
— Arundhati Roy on Indian mythology and folklore, in God of Small Things (1997)
“It was only once – once – that an audience went to see Romeo and Juliet, and hoped they might live happily ever after. You can bet that the word soon went around the playhouses: they don’t get out of that tomb alive. But every time it’s been played, every night, every show, we stand with Romeo at the Capulets’ monument. We know: when he breaks into the tomb, he will see Juliet asleep, and believe she is dead. We know he will be dead himself before he knows better. But every time, we are on the edge of our seats, holding out our knowledge like a present we can’t give him.”
— Hilary Mantel on Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet, in “Can These Bones Live?”, Reith Lecture, 2017
“So what makes this poem mnemonic is not just repetition. Rather, it’s the fact that with repetition, the repeated phrase grows more and more questionable. I’ve remembered “Come on now, boys” because, with every new repetition, it seems to offer more exasperation than encouragement, more doubt than assertion. I remembered this refrain because it kept me wondering about what it meant, which is to say, it kept me wondering about the kind of future it predicted. What is mnemonic about this repetition is not the reader’s ability to remember it, but that the phrase itself remembers something about the people it addresses; it remembers violence. Repetition, then, is not only a demonstration of something that keeps recurring: an endless supply of new generations of cruel boys with sweaty fists. It is also about our inability to stop this repetition: the established cycles of repetition are like spells and there’s no anti-spell to stop them from happening. The more we repeat, the less power we have over the words and the more power the words have over us. Poetic repetition is about the potency of language and the impotence of its speakers. In our care, language is futile and change is impossible.”
— Valzhyna Mort on Russian poet Yevgeny Yevtushenko, in “FACE – FACE – FACE: A Poet Under the Spell of Loss”, The Poetry Society Annual Lecture, 2021
#web weaving#quote compilation#shakespeare#romeo and juliet#Hilary Mantel#arundhati roy#valzhyna mort#excerpt#on poetry#on storytelling#god of small things
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"I'm a lot of things, but he's not dying for me!"
Based off that comic where Jason dies for Bruce against an evil robot, but instead Bruce and Jason agree that's not okay
Bruce: We need someone to take the killing blow from the robot. That’s not me. Making that clear: I’m not dying. I’m not that dead inside. We need someone who will die, but who can then be placed in this secret Lazarus Pit and revived. Who could take the blow?
Dick, Tim, and Damian all exchanged looks, their eyes landing on Jason, who was meticulously cleaning his gun chamber.
Jason (continuing to clean, deadpan): You use me as the sacrificial lamb, and I’m taking every single one of you with me.
Bruce (alarmed, eyebrows shooting up): Wait, what? Jason is not going to be the one who takes the death punch! Why would he— Did you think I wanted him to volunteer? Oh my God, you did!
The three men fell silent, surprised at Bruce's explosive reaction. Rising from his seat, Bruce did something unexpected—he hugged Jason tightly.
Bruce (fiercely protective, voice low): He died once; I’m not letting him go through that again. I bet you thought I wanted him to do this to prove I cared about him. How dare you think so little of me?
Dick (hesitant): I mean, we weren’t wording it like that…
Bruce (firmly): Nobody will hurt him like that again! Shame on all of you for even thinking I’d pick him, or that he’d volunteer.
Jason’s eyes shifted, confused briefly. Then, seizing the opportunity, he played up the emotion.
Jason (sniffling, voice trembling): They didn’t even need to say anything… They want me to die again!
Bruce (softening, comforting Jason): It's fine. I will deal with them later, especially Tim and Dick. I can see they wanted you to volunteer as tribute.
Dick (looking down, ashamed): I wasn’t saying it!
Tim (shouting, exasperated): He died already and was tossed into the Lazarus Pit! It makes the most sense!
Damian (dramatic, crossing his arms): You two should be ashamed of trying to throw Jason to his death again.
Tim (snapping back): Traitor!
Stephanie (eavesdropping while mixing her water bottle, interjecting): Oh, for the love of Jehovah, I’ll take the hit! I’ve always wanted to be tossed into the pit—just let me know what time and I—
Before she could finish, Cass tackled Stephanie to the ground.
Cass (with determination): You are not dying either! I refuse.
Stephanie (grinning despite being pinned): I know we talked about dating in two years, but can you not be clingy?
Bruce (frustrated): We’re never going to figure this out. Wait, I have another plan!
Bruce quickly dashed out of the room, only to return moments later, grabbing Jason to escort him out.
Dick (raising his hands in defense): We weren’t going to touch him!
Bruce (pointing an accusatory finger): You were thinking about it!
Dick (slumping in surrender): Damn it! Are we that predictable?
#batman#jason todd#red hood#bruce wayne#batfamily#batfamily shenanigans#batfamily headcanons#batfamily fanfiction#script fic#flash fiction#batfamily fluff#microfiction#batfamily comedy#batfamily funny#dc fanfiction#canon divergence#writer on ao3#batfamily wholesome#no beta we die like jason todd#batfamily feels#batfamily adventures#wayne family adventures#dick grayson#tim drake#damian wayne#stephcass#stephanie brown
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Every ten years, some of the most powerful beings in the multiverse bet on the life of an average human.
They've been doing it since humans evolved sentience, it's become tradition at this point. Azarath angel of war and fire. Opheria high lady of the autumn fae. Eoauiioaie old one of dreams and eater of planets. Drehn the dragon at the edge of time. Kalhesh demon of the unbreakable chain. Haramare the parasite that eats the bodies of dead universes. And many others, some of whom I can't even describe here, all gather to make their bets.
They pick a human by rolling millions of dice until they find someone who matches the DNA sequence generated. Then they'll begin to watch them, watch their little moves, their daily tasks, their relationships, everything about them. And they'll start making bets, on little things at the start of the year, on what they'll have for breakfast. On if they'll make the train on time. On what dreams they'll have when they sleep. But as time extends they start getting more and more invested, and they'll bet on the big things, if they'll ask out their crush, if they'll get that promotion, in some dark circumstances if they'll die.
There are only two rules. Nobody can use their powers to effect the person's life. And the human in question cannot be aware of extra dimensional being. The person is just living their normal life, and they're observing, seeing with baited breath what will happen, not knowing.
It's 2022, they're betting on a university student living in Tokyo. She's been burnt out for days, everyone is waiting intently to see if she finishes her papers in time. The multiverse cheers when she does. She passes all of her classes, does well, though feels the pain of a few sleepless nights. Despite her worst fears and insecurities she's quite intelligent, and all her paranoias prove to be illusions of the mind.
It's 2012, they're betting on a teenager living in the Midwestern US. They're considering coming out to their parents but they don't at the last momment. Some cheer because they remained safe and weren't hurt by their father. Some weep because they've waited even longer to come out now. They're still in the closest when they stop being followed on New Years Eve, their parents never accept them, they end up moving to Chicago for college and cutting off contact years after the contest ends.
It's 2002, they're better on a hunter living in the forests on South America, one of the few people left on the earth not to know of the colonizers and the empires of the west, though he's still felt their effects. He's almost ambushed by a python, everyone waits with baited breath hoping he survives. By all luck he does and the multiverse cheers. He'll die a few days after the contest ends, meeting a westerner for the first time, and meeting a western bullet for the first time, as he was considered to be "trespassing" on a private farm.
It's 1992, they're betting on an elderly man living in the suburbs of St. Petersburg, he comes home one night to find out that his beloved cat has died. He weeps and the multiverse weeps with him. Nobody could have known the cat was in danger, so no bets were made on her, but everyone weeps anyway, it is November, and the multiverse knew her well. Throughout halls of civilizations the old man will never know the cat is mourned, entities from countless worlds wishing things could have gone differently.
The contest is always broadcast to the entire multiverse. The faeries, and the old ones, and the demons and the angels, and all other manner of creature, always know. The ones making the bets always root for their predictions to come true, but those who are always watching tend to hope for the best outcome. They become so invested in everyone's lives, hoping everything is ok for them, loving the people they watch in a way those being watched will never truly know.
They say it's to keep them humble. So that the faeries, and the angels, and the dragons, and the elder horrors will all know in a way what it's like to be human, and know to care for those so much less powerful then them.
#196#worldbuilding#writing#my worldbuilding#my writing#fantasy#urban fantasy#multiverse#short fiction#short stories#short story#flash fiction#original story#original fiction#creative writing#writers#writers on tumblr#writeblr#writers and poets#writerscommunity#scifi worldbuilding#science fiction#scifi writing#faerie#faeries#fae#angels and demons#demons#angel#angels
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Random thoughts from Yingdu episode 4:
-Vein is so creepy toward Cheng Xiaoshi, but I have to admit I chuckled when Xia Fei pointed it out. Like, bro, of course they ran away—you totally freaked them out (literally in Lu Guang’s case lol).
-Extra points for using Vein’s official song during the small fight scene. It’s my favorite track from the trio!
-Lu Guang collapsing from stress makes perfect sense—someone please let this poor man rest. Honestly, I don’t think he’s had a single peaceful day since Cheng Xiaoshi died.
-The nightmare Lu Guang had was just cruel. Cheng Xiaoshi’s bloody ghost telling him he’s all alone, that they’re all dead… Does this mean Qiao Ling and Captain Xiao are definitely dead too?
-Cheng Xiaoshi taking care of Lu Guang was adorable. The fact that he’s so caring despite growing up lonely and lacking basic parental love is just beautiful.
-Xia Fei disliking Liu Xiao totally caught me off guard lol.
-Xia Fei telling Liu Xiao his “predictions were right” is so suspicious. Is it because he’s just waaay too smart, or does he have some hidden power that lets him see outcomes? Something about it feels sketchy.
-The photo snap sound effect when the blue-eyed cat appeared was such a great detail to symbolize Lu Guang observing Cheng Xiaoshi. That… or Lu Guang took an actual photo to keep track of him. This makes more sense lol.
-The way Xia Fei and the bar/restaurant)? owner reacted when Cheng Xiaoshi mentioned Cheng Weimin was WEIRD. I can’t tell if the owner was joking about not knowing him or lying, but their exaggerated reactions were creepy. What the hell did Cheng Weimin do?!
-It’s obvious the only student who survived the fire is the mysterious blonde woman (who I’m pretty sure we see younger in the Episode 5 PV). My guess is she’s around 14 or 15 in that photo, and since Yingdu happens 10 years later, she’d be around 25 now, which kinda fits with what little we’ve seen of her so far.
-Lu Guang pretending to be sick to get Cheng Xiaoshi back to the hotel, only to end up running back to the room himself, was hilarious. Also, shirtless Lu Guang—I bet some of you were happy with that back shot 👀
-Cheng Xiaoshi entering the photo by accident has me so confused. How did his powers suddenly activate like that? What triggered it? Was it purely coincidental that he was looking at a photo and clapped? I really hope they explain this.
-Related to the previous point: if Cheng Xiaoshi already knows he can enter photos on his own, then Yingdu is definitely not the timeline from seasons 1 and 2. He doesn’t learn this until season 1 (aka, approximately two years later) and we even get a small flashback on S1 where we see Lu Guang explaining how to activate his powers by clapping their hands together. That explanation didn’t happen in Yingdu.
-We got a glimpse of Cheng Weimin and a black-haired woman, tho I don’t know if she’s Cheng Xiaoshi’s mother or not)? I also couldn’t tell if she kicked him out of the photo when they made eye contact or if he was forced out by his own body because he was too stressed?? The man he was possessing didn’t die because in the episode 5 PV we catch a glimpse of how his photo changed, now it’s not only the building, but also his burned hand (the one he used to open the doors).
-Finally, Cheng Xiaoshi’s first dive being such a traumatic event? This donghua seriously has every character in desperate need of therapy 💀
#link click#shiguang daili ren#lu guang#cheng xiaoshi#shiguang#yingdu spoilers#liu xiao#vein#xia fei#qiao ling
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Everyone is jumping on the theory wagon so here are my personal predictions:
-You made a few posts about how one of the themes of PATFW is finding hope in hopeless situations which makes me think the ending of it won't be completly bleak. I think it'll be bittersweet, although leaning more on the bitter side. Maybe something along the lines of TMA's ending but a bit more melancholic
-Rainhaze is gonna die. There's no hope for him by now. Although, I think it would've been real fucked up if everybody except for him died and he was forced to go on without a purpouse. Fascinating but not that likely to happend imo
-I think both Blacknose and her kits will live, not only that I think at least one other character will survive so they can help her with the children. My bets on it are either Egrettail, Slugpelt or Daffofilpaw
-Barrenclan is DEFINATLY not getting reformed after the defience attack. I mean the previous chapter is literally called the death of Barrenclan
-I think Pinepaw will die at the end of the story, possibly in a murder/suicide in order to defeat Deepdark. It's sad, but I think it's a very likely possibility. Cormorantpaw will survive though and will have to live with only his memory :( Perhaps he'll get to reunite with his siblings though?
-I feel like to parallel the fire that burned down the forest that Roseclan resided in there's gonna be a fire near the end of the story. Not sure yet what it'll do yet tho. Perhaps it'll snuff out the defience?
-I'm not sure how likely it'll be but I think it'd be really nice if Pinepaw got to talk to or interact with some of the more unwilling members of the defience. Perhaps have a bit of a heart-to-heart with them as they're all stuck in the same horrible situation.
-To wrap this up, here are some other characters that I think will die: Redpelt, Beeface and/or Plumstripe (Either they both die defending the clan side by side and make peace with eachother, or only one of them dies and the other grieve the fact that she wasn't a better sister to her in life. Either way at least one of them is dying) and Prowl
YAAAAY I love these long endgame theory predictions so much. :D So much I can't say but I can read everything and nod my head sagely. ALSO I adore the bingos, they're so funny.
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Guys I think I know what the narrative is this season
It's not a server wide war or a sitcom-esque neighbourhood
It's not Wild Life because everyone is going Wild, but rather because only some people are
Think about it; how many references to past seasons there have been with people being predictable; the near opposite of wild, vs the amount of people who took a 180 in strategy and attitude this particular season
Think of any player and I bet you'll be able to figure out which one they fit in to
It's even the fact that there's one Wild player in each team
Bamboozlers:
Scar - Lotta 3rd Life references from the theme park concept (which was the original idea for Monopoly Mountain), the reputation board, falling off a cliff whilst singing in his base, etc
Lizzie - Base surrounded by greenery, lot of lives (both from last life), created 3 pet parrots (3 pet dogs in Last Life)
They both make references to Secret Life nearing the start of last session with Scar reminding his team how he can handle Etho (then went on to kill Etho) and Lizzie thinking about her party no one came to
But Jimmy? My guy has 5 kills, one of them being a double kill, and is sitting comfortably at 3 lives alongside Scar; which is unexpected to say the least as usually Jimmy's unluckiness causes his teammates to get bad placings, but they all are doing well
Final Girls:
Scott - All his teammates he already teamed up with in past seasons (multiple times in some cases), he is playing his usual strategy of making allies not enemies; he literally said aloud 'We need to start making allies', his sacrificial nature towards his teammates has not changed whatsoever and has had multiple attempts on his life already
Pearl - Her skin is a reference to her red life self, who got particularly popular the last season she teamed with Scott might I add (Double Life), she got herself a dog whose name rhymes with Tilly (Double Life) and she is not particularly liked by Gem because of the season prior (Secret Life)
Cleo - The BigB betrayal is insane to have happen again; both on the 4th session with near identical titles (Last Life), not to mention she again went to Pearl and Scott after it happened. The fact that there was a forest fire this session aswell is really putting the wild in Wild Life
But Impulse? Oh boy, COMPLETE 180
Much more chaotic than usual; hell even Scott, Gem and Cleo pointed out this change. According to them, even his tone of voice has changed this season
Spanners:
Skizz - Loyal to his team as always and is a sweetheart through and through, apologising to Lizzie after he killed her. Again he was the first one killed (Limited Life), is one of the first reds and might be the 3rd out of the series again
Grian - As usual is only mad at the 'cheap' kills others make against himself and others, desperately trying to keep his teammates alive with little success, having a base with bridges (Limited Life) that go no where (Secret Life)
Which leaves Mumbo to be the wild player of this team
And if him causing Scott to die a non-voluntary death for the first time in like seasons, not being as polite with insulting Joel's car, yelling at Martyn and encouraging Grian to kick Skizz out but complimenting him to his face doesn't sound wild for Mumbo, I don't know what does. He's also been particularly attached to Grian, and considering he has the Miner curse (dies soon after the canary, or Jimmy) and Jimmy also seems to be wild, Grian might be this seasons canary
Similar thing with Gem, Etho and Bdubs. Gem saying she misses the kind Impulse, Etho and Bdubs arguing over a horse like every other season, etc
Redwood is kinda the outlier with both Ren and Martyn seeming to do things as normal with Ren trading alliances with lives and Martyn voicing how everyone is aware of what he tends to be like in the earlier episodes; I mean this teammup has been done before, being one of the very few to repeat
Perhaps Ren coming back after 2 seasons had something to do with it - Ren wasn't supposed to be there, so it left things unbalanced. Actually when I think about it, maybe Martyn and BigB were supposed to team up. BigB would've been the wild player, which explains the skin, but the universe tried to correct itself which is why he didn't go into session 4 with his new skin, is making friends with Grian and Ren (previous allies from Double Life) and planned to betray Scott, which led to another BigB betrayal from Cleos pov
However, I believe Tango and Joel are a mix, leading them to be prominent players this time around. I already talked in a previous post about this season mimicking Last Life particularly Tango + Joel heading down what seems to be similar paths to Joel + Scott in Last Life
With mirroring past seasons players, they are wild with being very different AND the usual with being a walking reference
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what does being aroace do for alastor's character?
thing about alastor being aroace is that there's so much juicy potential (cannibal joke) embedded in this concept that i don't know about going too far into, as it's still early days and who knows what the direction will be. but. some analysis. some predictions. some headcanons. mix and match with hedonistic abandon. and at the end a bunch of feelings
first and foremost and basically what all the subsequent points will be about in some way, is it's such a great flipping on its head of a tired idea that aspec-ness (in the vague way it's often discussed) is a way of depicting inhumanity -- characters who can't love are Other, characters who don't want sex are childlike, the way to become a Human Adult Person is to enter into these partnerships, to be fixed. in alastor, being aroace is very much the thing that brings him to humanity, grounds him in something beneath the constant mask he wears. to dig deeper...
just visually, i like how his mask literally slips when he's propositioned/involved in sexual comedy/when people discuss romance too much around him. he glitches, or becomes otherwise uncomfortable, or zones out. i like the crack hc that he avoids val at all costs, that val is actually vox' best weapon against alastor, just because his whole Essence is outside of alastor's ability or wish to process
2. the fact that he's caught off-guard by attachment. he's created an untouchable persona (emotionally and physically to an extent/with exceptions -- the distance of the radio to the listener is something i think about a lot), that with the aroace read comes off partly as protection, especially considering how hypersexual hell is, and how generally hyper-romantic earth would have been (hell is romantic with caveats... more in a sec), so when he realises he almost died to protect the hotel gang it sends him into a full-on meltdown
3. that being said, the way he interacts with women is full of charm and ease: mimzy and rosie first and foremost, then also charlie and niffty, and even to an extent vaggie and possibly carmilla, and maybe cherri in future. he's able to get closer to women, able to be respectful in a southern gentleman old-timey way. it reads as chivalry-with-a-demonic-twist. alastor may be unsettling and untrustworthy for other reasons, but not about crossing sexual or romantic boundaries, which makes him surprisingly safe to hang around. i wonder if this was the case whilst living (and if, ironically, it meant that women ended up crossing his boundaries)
4. i especially would be into this tying into his relationship with niffty, who feels like a woman scorned/wronged/hurt in some way in a 50s housewife-ish romantic way (i personally think her story will be incredibly messed up when it's finally shown), but is very happy hanging out with alastor. sidenote, i bet alastor is so proud of her for killing adam
5. the fact that "ace in the hole" is a comment directed at the idea of alastor-and-charlie is fun and spoken about in-depth, and i will wonder until we find out (if we do) how rosie figured it out, and what it says for their relationship that she hasn't told alastor. that they have limitations to their closeness, or that she knows he'll reject it, or that he needs time to get there. personally i think alastor is so detached from himself that he wouldn't know what to do with it at present, it'd be functionally useless until he's learnt to come into himself more -- aroaceness as the end of a journey of humanising a character, not the thing that needs to be gotten away from in order to be seen as human
6. romance! in hell! it's a little stickier there, with sex-with-no-strings seeming to be a more popular pastime, so i think that part was more of a concern whilst he was alive, but that being said, im interested in how this plays into the above relationships, how characters will react to this part once he starts being more openly on the side of/affectionate with the wider hotel gang, and in how this might come up in future, with regards to...
7. vox! voooox! oh i want vox to become. so creepy. currently we've got underlying creepiness to vox' pathetic obsession with alastor that's coded as having been partially romantic and sexual in nature at one point (if not still romantic and sexual...). there's something about it that speaks to the way that alastor is not aroace because of trauma, but there is trauma involved in being aroace
8. that is, constantly having ones boundaries overstepped, whilst not having the words to say how or why or assert them properly, being projected onto by vox and maybe others while he was alive and post-death, potentially when-alive having that framed as a form of inhumanity in and of itself (and how that ties to him being a serial killer, which im so into)
9. the idea of having been made to feel alien in his own skin due to amatonormativity and not knowing why he feels this way, and compensating by creating boundaries that are extreme, but they work as coping mechanisms, up until... perhaps they won't (hinted at in the finale of s1)
10. (i soooo want vox' creepiness to eventually lead to him actually beating alastor in some way, temporarily, and alastor having to face the mortifying ordeal of being saved by the hotel gang, knowing he's weak and needs to be taken care of by them, knowing that they know that vox won in some way, knowing that vox will take it as vindication and become more powerful from it, know all his walls weren't strong enough in the end -- like a part two to the finale, which ultimately the others didn't see (although vox did) and was already such a big deal for him. gimme some alastor angst!!!)
11. smthinsmthin when we have an aroace character whose whole Deal is being untouchable (emotionally and physically, barring Certain People) being pushed into a space where he has to allow himself to be cared for and through that engage with his own boundaries and which ones have become poisonous to him vs the ones which are actually Who He Is
12. i like to think that he and angel could have an unlikely friendship with a lot of shenanigans, because they both have narratives focused on (re)establishing a relationship with their own bodies, after being made to feel unable to inhabit them as who they are -- angel due to abuse, alastor due to being aroace/repulsed (angel learning to respect alastor's boundaries and being protective of them as an extension of his own journey)
13. alastor filtering through what parts of him are him and what parts are the walls/coping mechanisms -- it's been a lot of years, even before he died, of building them after all. who is the man beneath it all?
14. big fan of how this interacts with his past as a murderer too -- the metaphor is made into something much deeper when the character's aroaceness is a humanising factor in a story about people who have done/do bad things. this not to say he'll necessarily be redeemed (but who knows, vaggie has killed a lot of people and probably will be, or, she'll probably stay in hell with charlie, but the narrative will go "she's chill now." in fact it already pretty much has), but that it adds to all the grey areas of his character. he's not a pure, sad little soul who's always suffering, he's dealt in suffering himself, he enjoys the suffering of others, and he's in control all the time
15. it must have been incredibly humiliating not only to die so stupidly/randomly/without say, but to become a deer demon after that. again, prey, weak, lack of control. his whole Thing is control of the narrative, and his death was totally out of that control, and that in and of itself plays into aroaceness as the idea of "if you can't verbalise yourself, if you can't adequately create boundaries, then overcorrect. become the most inscrutable, untouchable, unsettling, disturbing version of yourself. make people not want to get close to you in the first place"
16. and yet despite all that, he can't help liking people, he can't help being charming and funny and smart and in some ways there's a mask in that too -- sharp wit to cut people down, when you're not... literally cutting people down, a cool, shallow friendliness that deliberately keeps a tension at the forefront, the smartness helping to control and shape and keep power. funnily enough, when he's ready to be aroace, oh the real power he'll have (whether he'll use it for good or bad, or a mix of both... who knows, but he'll be fully himself at last, and that's a happy ending)
17. on the flipside to angel, i think it would take charlie a hot second to deal with it -- she'd be supportive in word, but also she's a known boundary-crosser/someone who has her fixed ideas of how things ought to be and it takes a strong "no" to make her realise when she's got it all wrong. all this to say, she might get the ace part, but she could struggle with the aro, trying to twist it into a version of love so that she could humanise him on her terms, using the word "love", until someone steps up for alastor in some way (in my head, angel, but that's my angel and alastor unlikely friends agenda)
18. husk already knows in some way. also not with words, but he's like, yeah this guy. none of that. are y'all surprised????
19. i wonder if when alive he briefly thought he might be a homosexual, or if he knew from the start that he wasn't, especially considering that men are more disgusting to him overall than women
20. i wonder if mimzy knows or suspects, and also if she was in love with him during their lifetime
21. i like to think in life he's utilised the tactics of the song "the gentleman doesn't believe" and just gone "i hate kissing i mean and uh. dancing. and jazz. and uh... smoking. and walking. and everyting else!!!! (but mostly kissing)" as a way of getting out of someone suggesting a date
22. alastor as hot and charming and unfuckable and unromanceable and repulsed by the idea of it all, and who has the supremely aroace fantasy powers of a. "am not being perceived" and b. "am so terrifying you wish you couldn't perceive me" and whose relationships are dictated by his aroaceness, not despite it!
23. ultimately, this point is the main one for me, regardless of how the story actually gets there: aroaceness as the end of a journey of humanising a character, not the thing that needs to be gotten away from in order to become human
24. pal of mine @creepysora said: "they didnt let anyone walk so now he waltzes ready for murder" and yeah. jumped straight to complex character with big, wonderful flaws in a strange little universe, bypassing all the dull explanatory 1-0-1 that just isn't my cup of tea and into a way of writing aroaceness that can be complex and nuanced and based in character, story, theme, rather than education -- he's not implied, he's not one-note, he's not there to explain, he's not defined solely by his role in the story as the token so-and-so, he's not there to be fixed, he's not there to be dubbed as Other, he is
this character genuinely doesn't exist elsewhere, outside of the stories and ideas i see shared and share within my community. this kind of focus, it's... kind of heady to be honest. like you only ever tasted something sweet in crumbs, and then someone gives you a boatload of it all at once
and tbh. he deserves a little murder. as a treat. because fuck, being aroace is hard
#alastor#hazbin hotel#aroace alastor#vox#radiostatic#angel dust#husk#niffty#rosie#charlie morningstar#mimzy#valentino#hazbin hotel meta#alastor meta#(staticradio is forever onesided)#sex repulsed alastor#romance repulsed alastor#loveless alastor#my meta
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in honor of being one week out from the Onyx Storm release, here is my long list of predictions, ranging from somewhat probable to very unlikely, in no particular order.
below the cut are a handful of spoilers for the leaks that have made the rounds. consider yourself warned!!
disclaimer: these are all for FUN. a lot of these are just my batshit insane theories that I think are funny.
starting with an obvious one: Xaden runs away at some point. I’m guessing the halfway point of the book or at the end.
Violet’s hair is a symptom of Lilith being partially drained by a venin while pregnant (I don’t think she’s actually venin, but I think that would be an interesting plot twist)
I already yapped to @maethologies about this one, but the Isle Kingdoms aren’t included on the map because it’s a representation of propaganda and how Navarre controlled information dissemination so thoroughly, thus meaning Violet wouldn’t know what a map of them would look like, which is why we as the readers don’t have access to that map (this one seems unlikely but I like it!)
OS is going to cover the second half of Violet’s second year in the Riders Quadrant, and the fourth and fifth books will each cover half of her third year.
and speaking of the sequels, i’d be willing to bet that one of them will have the word “silver” in the title (i’ll come back to this when the next title is announced and see if i’m right LOL)
Xaden’s mom is in the Isle Kingdoms drinking mai tais on a beach.
@skyfallscotland said there’s a theory that Xaden’s mom is the venin who had the silver hair and I also like that theory… even if it has some oedipal implications for his obsession with Vi’s hair 🥴
Violet’s second signet is precognition or prophetic visions. I don’t like the idea of truth-saying, and I don’t really like her being an inntinnsic either because I feel like it’s a lazy way to balance out Xaden’s second signet (even though that’s what’s probably going to end up happening). I have no text-based justifications for those signets, they’re just what I would prefer to Violet being an inntinnsic 😇 The bookworm in me thinks photographic memory would be fun, but that’s definitely not her signet.
Violet reveals that she and Xaden got married at the end of OS and the last line is something like “I’m going to find my husband” and has major end of ACOMAF vibes. again, very unlikely
Dain redemption arc continues. He and Sloane have a heart to heart off page and get into a relationship and we find out when they tell Violet (you thought this list wouldn’t be extremely self indulgent? hahahah)
Xaden runs away after he drains Violet during sex (likely) OR my personal insane theory is he drains and kills someone they’re all close to (ie: Rhi) and runs away after that.
Bodhi is going to have to pretend to be Xaden if they lock him up in the Rybestad chest for his own good. Bodhi then gets assassinated and Xaden goes full evil.
Sawyer isn’t going to die after losing his leg in IF, but I think Rhi and Ridoc are fair game. OR Sawyer losing his leg is a precursor to him dying… who knows.
The seventh breed of dragons is chilling in the Isle Kingdoms, and OS is a set up for the other road trip they’ll need to take in the fourth book.
Liam comes back to life and Violiaden lives happily ever after (let me have my fun)
Naolin is venin and alive or he’s actually dead and pulled from the earth before he died. But he was Tyrrish, hence the rune on Brennan’s hand. The rune is probably some old and dangerous magic and it wasn’t taught in the runes class, which is why Violet doesn’t ever recognize it.
Papa Sorrengail was poisoned. I think this idea originally comes from the Remi-verse (correct me if I’m wrong!). He and Lilith knew and let it happen because their children were threatened by the big bads in the government. Lilith hid his feathertail research after he died. Maybe the feathertails are the key to everything somehow and he knew?
Violet has a breakdown reading her mom’s journal. We get insight into Lilith’s personal beliefs regarding the venin.
Mira distances herself from the other Sorrengail siblings following Lilith’s death. She and Brennan get into an argument about it and their respective childhood traumas.
Mira dies Lilith-style by sacrificing herself for Violet. Violet feels copious amounts of guilt and crashes out, causing an insane lightning storm that kills whoever she was fighting.
#don’t hate me for that last one#especially oomfie who loves mira#again. these are just for fun!#the dain/sloane agenda continues mwahahah#onyx storm#onyx storm spoilers#onyx storm predictions
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Part 2 of ✨me predicting what happens in MDZS donghua and pissing my friend off bc of it✨ keep in mind this aren’t in chronological order cause my brain is weird LOL
CW: Cussing, a lot of cussing lol
-Introduction to Jiang Cheng for the first time.
Me- “Why is he build like a fucking dilf?- HIS AN UNCLE?!”
Friend- “He kinda is a dilf LNAKFHSKBD”
*Sees younger Jiang Cheng and his anger issues*
Me- “YOU CANNOT TELL ME HE ISNT CHIHUAHUA MATERIAL WITH THAT BABY FACE OF HIS AND HIS ANGER ISSUES!”
Friend- “HIS FUCKING GOT TRAUMA HE CANT BE A CHIHUAHUA”
Me- “Bro got it from his mama I bet”
*Meets Madame Yun and her anger issues*
Me- “OH HE DID GET IT FROM HIS MAMA I WAS JOKING-“
Friend- “LOL”
————
-Lan Xinchen starting to suspect WWX
Me- “Oh this person for sure knows his WWX”
LWJ looking lovingly at WWX
Friend- “QUEEEERS”
————
-Yi city arc begins and meets “Xiao Xingchen” for the first time
Me- “His so fake.”
Friend: “No his not”
*Later with the reveal*
Me- “SO I WAS RIGHT HA!”
Friend- “Do you hate fun that much?”
————
-Sees Jiang Yanli for the first time
Friend- “That’s the older sister, she’s the sweetest person in this show!”
Me- “She dies doesn’t she?”
Friend- “…”
Me-“PFFT”
Friend-“…fuck you.”
————
Lan Xinchen having a bromance with Jin Guangyao
Me- “…are the Lan brothers gay?? Like both of them??Cause I feel like I should NOT be here”
Friend- “HAIFBWKD”
————
-Sees Jin Guangshan for the first time during the hunt
Me- “Bro his so pretty…”
Friend- “His a fuck boy”
Me- “Of course he is”
————
-LWJ iconic “Come to Gusu with me”
Me- “WWX STOP BEING A FUCKING EMO BOY AND SAY YES! HIS PROPOSING!”
Friend- “HA!”
————
LWJ tying WWX with his forehead ribbon and showing the juniors.
Me- “Its always the silent ones that are the freakiest”
Friend- “His even worse in the novels. Man’s a full on f r e a k for WWX”
Me- “Im immediately buying the entire set”
————
-During the raid of the Nightless City and Jin Guangyao backstabs the Wen leader.
Me- “…Oooooo his about to backstab everyone isn’t he?”
Friend- “I’m about to stab you if you don’t stop-“
————
ANOTHER bromance
Me- “ARE YOU SURE THEY ARENT FUCKING?! I KNOW THAT LOOK ON LAN XINCHEN”
Friend- “His a bit fruity-“
Me- “The closet is made out of glass bro. I cannot deal with two different couples verbally edging each other for the entire series.”
————
Granny holding up the plushie to Lan Sizhui.
Me- “Omfg I’m dumb. THATS THE KID THEY ADOPTED?!”
Friend: “YEEEEEEEP”
And that’s all I remember. I’ll ask my friend is she remembers anymore and if she does expect a part 3 LMAO I enjoy making these
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Harrow the Ninth, Thoughts part 3
Finished the book! Harrow wasn't even insane, everyone was just gaslighting her. Gideon the First WAS attacking her. Ianthe was lying all the time, because Harrow told her to do so. Augustine and Mercy were lying to keep their cover, Johnny G. was lying because he also didn't know anything, even Harrow was lying to herself.
I understand, why both Lyctors had to kill John. But the consequences of what they'll do is insane. Obliterate 9 planets. Kill, likely Billions of People, Again. Who's to say killing off all life in a planet post ressurection won't make another Ressurection Beast to wreck havoc in the Universe. In an awful way, Mercy and Augustine are recreating the sin that John did. With likely the same consequences.
I can't agree with killing the Emperor, yes he deserves to die, but the price of doing so would have been too steep. I'd lock him in a tomb, and have him empower Dominicus for eternity. Killing John, and Dominicus in turn leads the nine houses to be put under the control of Augustine or Mercy, and through that connection, the Blood of Eden.
We don't even know who tf the Blood of Eden is! For all we know they're Fanatics and Zealots. With a name like that I'd bet money on them hyper religious freaks and Zealots. Probably some Brotherhood of Steel, Adeptus Mechanicus style cult. Likely the type to uncritically worship Nostalgia and the Past.
I'd stick with John honestly. Maybe John Gohn could be better one day, and I HOPE he was telling the truth about his regrets. If he didn't, well fuck him then. Warhammer 40k had the right idea for God Emperors. Turn the bastard into a living battery. I think, a part of Jod was hoping the 8 in GtN, would crack the formula. Maybe that's why he was hoping they would take it slow, do it with years of study and preparation. So, I can't really hate Ianthe for what she did. Or maybe, I just fell for Jaius Gaius sad wet cat act.
Also, Harrow and Gideon definitely opened the stupid tomb. Gideon found Harrow in the Tomb. So Alecto was definitely released. Maybe, partially? But she's still out there, somewhere. Maybe the girl living with Camilla. Who knows
I am, so very very happy I got my prediction about the Sleeper right. Once I realized Gideon was alive and consciousness inside Harrow, there was only one suspect. Gideon's Mom. Where else was a friggin Haz Suit ever mentioned except the one her Mom was found in. Considering Palamedes mentioned that you bring your last memory with you when you died, of course her Mom remembered being in a Haz Suit
#the locked tomb#tlt#harrow the ninth#htn#harrowhark nonagesimus#gideon nav#john gaius#ianthe tridentarius
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WILD LIFE FINALE!!!
Wait it IS every wildcard? But just in sequence? Banana again. And finally the 3 grinches are clearly aligned. THE SNAILS!!! Is it every other wildcard card? Or only the useful ones? Ah back to his failed machine gun cross bow strategy. Randomized wild cards? ETHO GOT THE MACE ONE AGAIN LOOOOL. He simply cannot escape being breeze-coded. BigB is now the most important ally to have. Bdubs can’t beat the BigB allegations TRIVIABOT IS BACK!!! WITH CURRENT SESSION QUESTIONS! Omg. Time to see our players make an absolute fool of themselves again. Despairing over wasting time mining for diamonds last session LOL. Robot Tango again!!! Also this would help the shapeshifters maintain their disguise. THE TRIVIABOT JUST DIED IN FRONT OF THEM OH MY GOD!?!? His Minecraft body language is so communicative. Etho: “Honestly Tango: probably for the best, with the way things have been going”
Wait so the wild cards keep randomizing? And so the super powers with it??? This is going to be so chaotic. Also where’s Mumbo? Not Etho mistaking Ren for Martyn and giving him stuff LOL. Etho: “Somebody needs to blow up Joel’s car again” ETHO LOOOOOL THATS SO BRUTAL.
In which Etho’s Canadianness saves him from Scar's rollercoaster. And of course he forgot about his zombie powers. I’m sure his zombies has some words about that. Should have saved his enchanted leftover armor for his zombies lol. Etho: “You guys gotta hurry though cuz- *Skizz immediately dies in front of them*”
Whose snail is that? Do zombies get zombie snails too? Nooo the zombies…..
I bet BigB’s about to attempt to mace Etho as he answers the TriviaBot. Omg snails + triviabot is such a deadly combo. BIGB NOOOO NOT TO A SNAIL!!! BigB literally just died and Etho accidentally called Bdubs BigB.
OH MY GOD HIS TRAP AND BETRAYAL ACTUALLY WORKED!!!! NO WONDER THAT WAS HIS THUMBNAIL LOOOOOL. I guess that’s what happens when you try to corner Etho into picking your side AHAHAH. Yet another illegal yellow on yellow kill. AND THEN HIS SNAIL GOT HIM BECAUSE HE LITERALLY WALKED TOWARDS IT INSTANT KARMA OH MY GOD. I CANT IM LAUGHING SO HARD WHAT IS THIS NONSENSE.
Mount Gem is blowing and it’s all Etho’s fault. She’s no longer overlooking patheticness.
WHO WROTE THIS QUESTION!?!! I HAVE SOME WORDS FOR YOU!!!
Look at Etho really committing to the innocent pathetic tuff guy bit.
Wait who has the teleport? Was it Joel or Grian? And I think the other one is shapeshifter. THAT WAS SO CHAOTIC HE JUST KILLED IMPULSE OUT OF THE SERIES OMG. “Why is it not working?” BECAUSE IT’S A BAD STRATEGY AND YOU CANT AIM??? ALSO YOUR TARGET CAN TELEPORT LOL???? What a hilarious chaotic scrum. They truly can’t touch a warper. He’s just leading them around in circles. Grian’s screech as he got warped in was so good. Did the super speed just benched because it was too op??
lol what was that 1x1 pvp. ETHO GOT SCOTT OUT. OF ALL PEOPLE TO DO SO. THE TIMING. Finally the crossbow was useful. Even when Gem loses she stays winning.
Yep not answering trivia bot, lighting up the area, and staying aware and away from the snail was the smart gamer move.
I can’t believe of all people it’s the Tuff Guys who made it intact to the final 8. And Tango has answered every single trivia question wrong and got robo’ed AGAIN. How nice for everyone to congregate near the middle at the Tuff Guys base. Why is Etho standing underneath and around the RAILTRACKS. If Joel TNT minecarts you all, it’s so deserved. Repelling a trident with a windcharge is cool. HE BLEW HIMSELF UP AGAIN LOL. Only 1 successful trap in all the series. Hoisted by his own breezy petard. Pathetic Tuff Guy to the end.
I got spoiled a bit but I’m so glad that I predicted correctly. They went strip mining in the finale…. Ah all the wild cards are not as extreme. "CHILD LIFE" JOEL?!?! The anxiety cheetah allegations are back. He’s such a sucker for pathetic men / his wife and just giving them whatever they ask for and not being hostile to them. He’s speedbridging again. Of course he tries to use his op invis ability and immediately gets exposed because of a dog. Lizzie tries to blow him up via zombie Martyn and he’s like oooooh iron!
Joel: “Pretty sure it’s Jimmy he’s got mascot energy” What does that even mean??
That Ghast screeches were unholy. Not Gem helping Lizzie, and Joel immediately leaving the Gem-Pearl drama Etho nearly got Joel as well… and how does Joel just fall for his excuses and lies every single time. And Joel keeps rescuing his wife and Jimmy from dangerous mobs.
Of course Joel dies to Scott but at least Etho got Scott back. Even if it’s by accident. And of course Joel takes it as an alliance at face value. Etho got karma’ed by his snail AND HE GOT IMPULSE WITH THE INVIS SNAIL AS WELL!! The snails are on the family’s side. Joel stays winning. Lizzie and Jimmy going out together. Rip Joel.
Ah Etho thought it was a genuine attempt but they were just messing with him. And I’m sure there’s going to be so much angst about Lizzie going after Joel and he punching her into her creeper death. What a circus of them trying to get Joel. And Grian accidentally saved him with the warp. Then he sets up a creeper trap and accidentally nearly kills Gem LOL. And he’s so focused on trying to make a trap that Scott gets him. “no-YES!” And Joel accidentally triggering all the trapped chests that Gem set again (just like Secret Life finale)
TANGO NOT AGAIN!!!! REN LOL. Oof Grian.
Of course Joel goes to see if his first trap that he spent so much time and effort on would have worked. And of course it didn’t. Even when he wins he stays losing.
How fast they stop cheering.
Grian absolutely ripping Tuff Guys to shreds. And he’s just noping away from Ren’s angst but also contributing to it with the unnecessary elaboration. Look at him and Etho continuing their playful tone banter.
Grian, looking at Pearl and Impulse: “How have we all had the same idea?”
“You got Dumb and Dumber!” Guess Grian’s still mad at Mumbo and banned him LOL.
The snails!! Giving everyone heart attacks and killing everyone in a rampage. No wonder he was so anxious about not knowing where his snail was. Grian and Scar helping each other out A LOT.
Grian: “It was always going to be like this Jim.” Eret vibes. That was SO BRUTAL. But that’s the commitment Grian has. Hell hath no fury like a widow scorned. And it’s basically the same line he used on Mumbo too.
He finally did save Joel with a warp, even putting himself on the line! Pulled through from the last episode. It’s so tragic that Grian and Joel didn’t think to warp someone to their snail.
Grian ABSOLUTELY NOPING out of the death tower that claimed so many of his allies.
How has he missed every single shot??? He’s literally in the best position too. Grian dying by falling off a cliff where he and Scar based next to a tower ala 3rd Life!!! It’s always a finale cliff.
Seeing behind the scenes snippets is so cool! And the snails!!!
LOL. Something about counting sheep to fall asleep...
Classic Gem. It would be so cool if Gem did actually take out Lizzie because that’s Joel’s only weakness.
LOL
Gem coldly rejecting any attempts to beg with “well you killed me and also weren’t good friends”
Was the bee someone? Gem pulled out her sword at it and it immediately u-turned.
She’s not even using her speed just walking away from Pearl’s mace attempts. Scott watching in exasperation. “We can’t talk until I’m on red? You better work a little harder then.” The return of toxic yuri and pathetic Pearl. She likes red bloodthirsty pathetic Pearl the best?!?! What is wrong with the both of them. What does Gem even WANT?!?!? Being red together? Killing each other for real? Or wanting Pearl constantly obsessing over her, chasing after her death but also her affection? I’m sinking my teeth into this insane dynamic.
She really just snatched up those items from right on front of her snail! I was tense!!! TWICE!!!
She’s so proud of Etho for finally killing her. I’m surprised she didn’t engage with Pearl now that she’s on red. “I'm going to make it my life’s mission to kill Impulse” and then Impulse dies to the invis snail. Even when she loses she stays winning. She didn’t even put in the part where Etho got instant karma’d by his snail too.
I love her captions so much.
Gem yelling at incompetent players has to be a compilation somewhere. Her not feeling the need to get involved with the chaos because they will all self-destruct is very watcher lore of her.
Gem encouraging Pearl’s wet cat-ness continues!!!! We are so fed!!!!
SHE MADE BDUBS ETHO AND GRIANS SNAIL INVIS AHAHAHA.
She’s trying to be insane with Pearl but Joel keeps accidentally interrupting their moment LOL. The enthusiastic tone shift, the deliberate matchy clothing…
Oof the one time she answered the TriviaBot wrong (to be fair she might have misclicked or been punched or just under too much time pressure) The sped up time killing her AGAIN. Oof. But at least no one got her; the wild card did!!! And she had to really hammer in the point about roleplay to settle the drama lol. She played so well!!! Shame we didn’t see more insane dynamics; I was really excited for the angsty 1v1 with either Pearl or Joel. And Joel won!!!
THIS TITLE AND DESCRIPTION LOOOOOOOL
Of course Scott can twin into Pearl and Pearl got Gem's powers. The perfect selection for lore and soulmate / toxic yuri angst.
Ah man they missed an opportunity to trap the blocks around the creaking heart so that it instantly sets off a tnt minecart. A swarm of angry bees is mean LOL!!!
She has fond memories of murder camel!!! Of course it’s Scott as her murder buddy.
Gem cut out SO MUCH pathetic mace Pearl content LOL. Cleo Impulse and Pearl vs Gem and she still barely landed like 2 hits. Gem’s POV didn’t hear the part where Pearl said GEM said that they couldn’t talk until she was on red. The unreliable narrator is SO GOOD!! Pearl panting like an excited dog on her last wind charge targeting Joel!!!! Gem cut out the part where she implies that Pearl doesn’t actually want to kill her because she warned her about her snail. And when Gem compliments her she starts backing off because she’s suspicious. The excited dog panting AGAIN when Gem basically stood still until the last moment??? Gem: “Right under you...” This dynamic is EVERYTHING!!
The cry of rage when Impulse died.
The pathetic wet cat allegations cannot be beat. Especially when she accidentally hotgal’ed BigB instead of Joel. The sad resignation in her voice about being pathetic. Omg I just realized the Hotguy Comic Zine roleswap AU basically got canonized.
The universe is homophobic and refused to let their yuri be reconciled, tearing them apart at Pearl’s expense at every opportunity. Excellent timing from terrible trapper warper!Joel. Gem says she can’t control him literally at the same place where they bullied MurderBot!Pearl and said the same thing of “yeah he’s just harmless like that.”
She water bucketed Gem after Scott lava’d her! Didn’t capitalize on the weakness for the kill!! Her TriviaBot question was literally about Gem giving flowers to another person!!! She pearled away!!!! And she’s sad about Gem dying!!!!! IM SCREAMING
Pearl, desolate: “I’m so lost… I didn’t get to have the murder camel with Gem. Impulse died!! What do I do?” *sad music* THE TRAGEDY!!! The return of lonely Pearl!!!! “My heart has never been so broken before in the Life Series..”
Cleo and Pearl are Ren’s swords instead!!!!! Dogwarts symbolism increases. She got poisoned arrowed and fall damage from an ender pearl into the bamboo, by Grian??? Oof.
Tango got beep booped!! Running joyfully towards "free food" (cows) and immediately bravely fleeing with extra flee when they converted into hostile mobs. “That’s not free food!”
He’s really going through all the previous sessions again. Stealing bots in the EXACT same place. eSCARgone LOL. Doesn’t even know what his superpower is as he holds his refilling windcharges, with the full durability mace in the hotbar. Unparalleled powers of observation indeed.
How did the most tenuously held together team make it all the way to the final 8? And of course classic Tango got beep booped AGAIN. He has NOT answered a single one right.
Tango AGAIN WITH WINDCHARGE ON THE TOWER!!! ON HIS TEAMMATE NO LESS!!! AND THEN HE BLEW HIMSELF UP WITH A CREEPER AND JOEL’S JOKE ARROW SHOT KILLED HIM LOOOOOL. Dying as he lived: accidentally killing someone he wasn't supposed while making Tango noises. On brand hilariously lame final death. Legend!!
Bdubs unashamedly stealing everything just to please Etho LOL. Cannot beat the BigB allegations with the creaking superpower.
Bdubs, after getting a question wrong and taking it out on Pearl: “MAYBE YOU’D WATCH MY EPISODE AND GIVE ME SOME VIEWS AND AD REVENUE!!”
Bdubs being calmed by Gem’s chill farming in the middle of the finale LOL. It’s all about the building and relaxation vibes with him.
Love how the terminology went from robot to beep boop!! And Bdubs is yelling at Etho about his encroaching snail but all he hears is beep boop. There's got to be an airpods meme in there. And then he tries to kill Etho even before he got him mixed up with BigB. It's honestly such a miracle that these 3 made it to the final 8, as the last intact team even. WHAT IS THIS DEAD WIFE FLUFFY WHOLESOME BACKSTORY TEAM SOLIDARITY AGAINST ALL ODDS AND EXPECTATIONS FLASHBACK????? Bdubs ABSOLUTELY just baiting his audience LOL??? And then somehow Etho understanding Bdubs’ beep boop arrow communication????
Gem and Joel had NO IDEA Bdubs was trying to kill them the entire time LOL That was a smooth escape from Pearl and Ren’s TNT cobwebs
The earlier reference to Bdubs’ boogey kill on Tango from Last Life from Etho and then dying by Tango’s windcharge here!!!! Bdubs: “That’s poetic irony” INDEED
Of course the Tuff guys died as they lived: bumbling around, taking each other and themselves out of the series.
THE SHADE!!! OF COURSE IT'S CLEO WHO GOT THIS QUESTION LOL!!! Her final superpower of summoning ALL the zombies!!! On brand!!! Seeing the horde of zombies in their amazing skins just swarming Gem was AMAZING. She's getting karma'd from this series and Secret Life. She didn't turn to fight off Joel, but remained attacking Grian to protect Ren all the way to the end. Truly loyal!!!!
Of course Scott got the other shapeshifting one. Maybe it is allocated by red and yellow. Also it’s hilarious seeing little Scott riding giant Scott. Well he did get Joel before he died to Etho!
Impulse was actually in such a good position to set a trap for Gem and Joel but the INVIS SNAIL!!! His luck failed against Gem and Joel's.
BigB was the first to die to his snail, it was his first death, and it's fitting that it was his final death too. Also the swarm of angry bees was hilarious. His commitment to the weird gaslighting vibe is incredible.
Her Lichjesty Lizzie being the most competent by immediately setting traps, fixing the redstone of Scar’s rollercoaster, testing it twice (got the dog!), saving Scar from his snail, and being very efficient with her zombies. She spun and launched her bot LOL!!!
Lizzie: “I need you to bam me in the bunker.” Grian: “Sosorrywhat” *Jimmy and Grian pause and look at each other in shock* Jimmy: “Don’t tell Joel.” Efficient but why would she say it like that. That was a really awkward scene.
And immediately figured out how to use her dna copying superpower. Wait it wasn’t Tango who got the first mace kill? Mumbo then?
Lizzie: “Well I guess the Bamboozlers became the Bamlosers. First team eliminated. Leave a like to pay your respects.” SHE’S SO FUNNY OMG?!?!?! They all died at basically the same time! LIZZIE AS A ROBOT ZOMBIE TRYING TO KILL JOEL LOOOOOL
Of course Jimmy gets the bright idea to lead his ravager to Joel’s base and act pathetic to get rescued. And then get freaked out by NOT his snail.
Can’t actually believe Scar finished his rollercoaster, rode it and Grian made it happen. How interesting that they both independently came up with series-long minecart rides of death. Of course his rollercoaster of death never worked.
Not Scar being mad that Grian is stealing his hotguy brand and tridenting him. And Etho being too Canadian and Scar feeling bad about killing him so many times, thus saving him from the rollercoaster.
Honestly where did eSCARgo even come from? LORE?!?!?!? Of course he died immediately after being resurrected.
Martyn as a zombie is so good. The voice, the wit, the goonishness. Bdubs awkwardly watching the divorce of Zombie Martyn and Mutant Martren. That cobwebs on Bdubs and Joel was pretty cool.
The angsty robot voice going "Ow." "I did a bucket thing." and "At least I got a couple of swipes in." is utterly HILARIOUS. And he finished 3rd, just as he wanted in the beginning!
Skizz..... He was literally about to follow Scar to his death.
“The ending is yours… Make it WILD”. Can't wait for the fandom to lore this up. Especially with the red “yours”.
This series truly has been about chaotic dramatic ironic comedic timing. Bringing up past drama, thus causing even more divorces. Absolutely no notes; it's perfection. And the FANTASTIC production work by the dev team! Funniest Life series yet!! After listening to the Wild Life Recap on the Imp & Skizz Podcast: I truly can't believe that Martyn got the listener superpower by RANDOM. And that it wasn't sorted by red / yellow / green as well. It was also a surprise that the order of the finale overlapping wild cards wasn't random. It WASN'T a surprise that they all actually randomly put on their zombie skins to red herring us. But most of all, frankly I'm amazed at how fast the dev team got everything done on such tight deadline, with such polished work! Presentation truly is everything.
#Etho#Joel#grian#gem#pearl#bdubs#tango#lizzie#jimmy#bigb#gtws#rendog#smajor#life series#wild life#enpr-ss
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Since I've been having so much fun with predictions for this show, I'm gonna lay down my incredibly specific bet for how Francis dies.
I've touched on most elements of this before but I want a post to go back and reference when ep 7 ends, to see where my head was at even if I'm wrong.
It's time to connect some dots.
And then find out next week that i didn't connect shit lmao.
There's a reveal waiting in the wings to do with Rex Calabrese, for sure.
Obviously Rex has been set up since the first moments of the pilot, and he came up again in ep 5, and again ep 6.
Rex has specifically been set up as a positive, aspirational figure in Oz's life, the guy who took care of everyone, for whom crime was his way of being a good guy.
This entire show, this Rex Calabrese Myth has been the core of Ozwald's self justifications. It's all worth it to do the good that Rex did, to be loved like Rex was.
But the show has also not shied away from how selfish and hollow these justifications are. Even in this episode—"You know how meaningful that is? To be the guy in the neighborhood who takes care of people?" Not to take care of people for their sake. To be the guy they love for taking care of them.
Especially compared to Eve's genuine love and bond with her girls, Oz's good gangster fantasy has been shown time and time again to be just self aggrandizing excuses.
So I am convinced that one part of this Rex Calabrese reveal is going to be that he was also a lying asshole con man, that Oz was just one of the suckers who fell for it. We've seen from Eve that Oz can spew bullshit with the best, but can't sniff it out like Sofia can.
But there's something else to the Rex thing. The show has been real quiet about Oz's dad so far. That even got pointed out this ep.
In Ep 5, Francis says that Oz has big dreams, just like his father. And Oz says, no, I ain't like him.
In Ep 6, Francis talks to Oz as if she thinks he's his dad, saying that he needs to do something about the heat, that like it or not, "they're his boys", and if he doesn't, she'll go to Rex.
It sounds initially like Rex and Oz's father are different people, but... Oz had two brothers. Two older brothers, too, I think.
This is a bit of a stretch, and the part of this theory I'm least certain about, but I think it's possible that the person Oz thinks is his father is only Jack and Benny's bio dad, and that his bio dad is actually Rex, when his mom went to Rex after the dad couldn't keep the money coming in.
I just feel like this would make for a great gut punch combined with the takedown of the Rex myth, you know? If Oz learns that he is the son of his childhood hero, only for that idealized vision of Rex to be exposed as a facade at the same time, for Oz to have to face that he was born of, has admired, and has ultimately been acting just like a slimy, sleazy scumbag who did more harm than good in his life.
Maybe even hurt his ma? Maybe that's why Francis left Rex and went back to her original partner?
Vic's lie to Francis about Oz killing the whole Falcone family
First of all there is no way this doesn't come up when Sofia and Francis are in a scene together. Like. Vic didn't say all the Falcones except Sofia. He said they're all dead. Oz pulled this off.
But it was a lie. Sofia is the last of her line, by her own hand. It was all a lie, and Francis has been so consistent about this, she hates when her son lies to her. I can't blame her, either—when your own mind lies to you constantly, you want there to be an anchor, a pillar of truth in your life. If you can't trust yourself, you have to be able to trust *someone*, or you're lost.
Oswald didn't lie to her, this time. Vic did. But under the circumstances, I wonder if that isn't a technicality that gets easily lost.
I wonder if she isn't going to do what she's done all throughout the show, and cut Oswald to the core when she finds out.
The way Francis has been displacing affection onto Vic has clearly been leading up to... something.
She has consistently been so harsh, so demanding towards Oswald, the only remaining son who has the means to take care of her.
But to Vic, she has been so sweet and kind, possibly because she has no expectations of a boy not her blood, possibly because she's mentally substituting him in for her other sons.
Death makes martyrs of your children.
And Oz hasn't been responding well to this. To the way Francis praises Vic, to the way Vic was able to calm her down and make her happy when he just made her angry.
Oz responds badly to a lot of things. But when Eve broke up with him, he said something specific. "You got some high roller you'd rather be shacking up with?" Do you have someone better than me? Have I already been replaced? Am I not enough for my place in your life, is there someone who does everything I do but better?
This whole family unit is sitting on an emotional powder keg.
Francis's request for euthanasia uahghghghghgh
In a show about a determined antihero, Oz would follow through on his mom's request. This is not that show.
That being said, I think that means there are sort of two really evil ways that the show could kill Francis. Which will happen, btw. She is going to die.
The first is for Oz to refuse to kill his mom, leaving her in position to die horribly at someone else's hands.
I can see this one in theory, but I feel like it doesn't have a solid emotional impact? Refusing to euthanize your mother is an understandable, if slightly selfish thing to do. Especially under an extremely stressful situation like your mom has been kidnapped and. idk. electroshocked by Dr Subdrop, who fucking knows.
The other really awful thing they could do is to have Oz kill his mom, in a scene where she is explicitly lucid and clearheaded, and then justify it to himself afterwards as a mercy killing, it's what she asked of me, I was a good son to her.
People working on the penguin have been dropping hints that by the last two episodes, Oz will have done something irredeemably horrific, and I just. This would be fucking *vile*.
Here's my theory. And I type this with the full understanding that this is so specific it's almost certainly not going to go down like this.
Sofia takes Vic and Francis away somewhere, and over the course of whatever scenes they have, Francis realizes that "Oz wiped out the Falcones" was a lie. (idk that I would want Sofia to tell her directly, we already did a "oh, you didn't know?" scene with Eve.) Oz shows up at some point, and learns both about the lie Vic told, and that his mother is now furiously angry about it
Somehow Oz gets Francis away, and here my theory kinda splits into two possibilities.
a) Oz gets Francis away by sacrificing Vic, and Francis blows up on him about leaving vic and about the lie.
or b) Oz, Francis, and Vic all get away, and once they're out Oz attacks Vic for lying to his ma and making her mad at him, and Francis blows up on him in Vic's defence or just because she's so angry at him she doesn't even think about Vic.
Either ways, she throws the truth in his face in a moment of clear eyed lucidity—he is Rex's son, and just like Rex, he's a scummy, lying piece of shit who will never amount to anything.
(there's a part of me that thinks maybe instead of Rex it'll be smth about his brothers? god knows how their deaths will play into things idk where they fit here)
and in a mirror to the absolute senseless rage and pain he felt when his childhood dream of being Rex was insulted by Alberto in Ep 1, he kills his own mother, and cements himself as the villain of this show.
#oz cobb#francis cobb#victor aguilar#hbo penguin#to be clear i know this is an insanely specific theory. I just like making these. I think it'd be cool. But this show keeps surprising me.#that's what i like so much about it.
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