#pran even has the time to look up at pat!!!

[airenyah]

3am and i'm thinking about the rooftop kiss

[impala124]

Bad Buddy Ep 6

My thoughts on Ep 1 | Ep 2 | Ep 3 | Ep 4 | Ep 5

Me, at the end of this episode:

Something about the way Pran buttoned his shirt all the way up to the collar, like it's suffocating for him to share space with Pat for the first time since their rooftop kiss, is making me unwell.

Why is Pat's father on my screen? I do not like that man. He makes Pran uncomfortable and I can't allow that. Why does Pran make himself look small when interacting with Pat's dad? Is it just his way of showing respect for an elder or is there something more?

"We know how it's going to end; isn't it better not to start at all?" Pran, bestie, are we still talking about music here? It hasn't escaped me that Pran is leaving the guitar with Wai after Pat kept it with him for 3 years before returning it to Pran. I just hope Pat doesn't find out about this.

Now, What is Pran's mom deal? You're on a timeout along with Pat's dad. Go sit in the corner for a while.

Pa is a child of (PatPran's) divorce at this point. She has to put up with Pat wreaking havoc in his room with the drums.

Pa out her assuming that everyone likes Ink because she likes her. Understandable, bestie, but you're way off in this case.

Pat following Pran to the architecture faculty volunteer camp strengthens my belief that Pat is just a lost puppy following Pran around.

The irony of Pran ignoring Pat by using the earphones that Pat gave him isn't lost on me.

Pran hasn't counted on Pat's pesky persistence. I'm cheering you on, Pat; make Pran go off-kilter.

Now, let's all thank Uncle Tong for coming up with these activities at a volunteer camp and divine intervention for actually pairing them together.

PAT USED HIS HAND TO PROTECT PRAN'S HEAD FROM THE FALL.

Wai is officially on my shit list. Why is he being so damn possessive of Pran? Pran can make his own choices, and if he weren't comfortable with Pat lying on him, I can't imagine why he wouldn't be, he can take care of himself.

Pat, bestie, I love how brazen you are, and I appreciate it.

Pran saying, "Someone like him will quit bothering us when he has had enough," in relation to Pat, and Pat coming with a chair to settle between Pran and Wai is just too fucking funny.

Now, Pran is being the physical embodiment of "My having feelings for you has nothing to do with you. Don't talk to me."

Pat is using the child, Junior, as their unofficial couple's counselor.

So, the trip to the market counts as a date, right? Glad we agree on that. Even the vendor thinks that they look cute together.

PLAYING IN THE WATER TOGETHER!!! This episode is a gift that keeps on giving. The conversation by the beach.

Okay, but what did Pat do to have Pran transferred from the school? I get his anger at his mom, but what did Pat do other than be a part of the band?

I love how, although there isn't any direct mention of homophobia (yet) in the show, their (familial & faculty) rivalry, that they didn't ask for but was imposed on them, feels like an allegory for it.

Without people around, I can sit next to you just fine. But when there's other people, talking to you feels like amatter of life and death. What can we do? We were just born this way.

OMG. Their hands touched, and Pran didn't pull away!!!!

I'm not even mad about the product placements, and that's how you know the show got me hooked.

Wai and Pat sharing a room will be interesting for sure. I don't trust him, though; he looks like he's planning to hurt my boy.

I love how Pat has zero chill, just bulldozing his way to Pran.

Wai, you fucking asshole, who do you think you are?? Pran, save your man!!!

And he does. Pran's on-the-spot lore cooking skills need to be taught in school. It's a survival skill if I'm being honest. He wasn't lying, though. His first love did fall in love. WITH HIM.

Pat CAUGHT Pran's hand and stopped him from leaving. ASFFGHDGJ—

Oh, nothing to see here, just a pair of lying liars sitting by the beach and lying to each other.

Pat's face lit up like a Christmas tree when he heard Pran say It is so obvious that you like me.

Gotta love Pat's tenacity and how he maneuvered Pran into being the recipient of his flirting.

Everything's gotta be a competition with these two. However, in this scenario, both of them are going to win and have fun along the way.

Let the (flirting) games begin!!!

Pran's definition of flirting is licking Pat's finger. SIT WITH THAT INFORMATION!! Pran, my beloved, you are a fucking menace for pulling the big guns out this early in the game!!

Tagging the usual suspects: @shortpplfedup, @incandescentflower, @starryalpacasstuff, @7nessasaryevils, @greenteadumplings, @grapejuicegay, @madworld-bbs, @usodeshou. If anyone wishes to be tagged in the future, let me know.

[fiddlepickdouglas]

Where do you watch your Thai BL dramas and do you recommend any to start with?

WOW how did I miss seeing this????

Oh boy this is gonna take a while for me to properly answer because you managed to ask, in so few words, a question that has a long answer! (Which I am all too delighted to give, HEHE)

This ended up being such a long post omg, here's a read more.

So starting with where: There's quite a few places. Streaming services with a prescription, YouTube, and even a few free sites where fans will typically upload content (depending on availability and access, these update latest if a show can be found at all).

Streaming platforms (featuring Chinese, Taiwanese, Japanese, Korean, and Thai content):

iQiyi - Chinese owned, has a free option with ads and a subscription option. Also features bonus content on certain shows that subbed users can access if you're into that. Has a good balance of stuff that isn't LGBTQ+, lots of great Chinese wuxia - I'm honestly amazed they have as much queer shows as they do but I am not complaining because there's a lot of good ones there.

GagaOolala - Taiwanese owned, has a free option with ads and a subscription option. Stout LGBTQ+ collection. There's certainly other programming but it's thing is being more out and proud, so it's a win for me.

Viki - American owned, allows users to add/edit subtitles. I haven't used this one much, but I haven't needed to get a subscription so far with the shows I have sought to watch and haven't been bothered with ads either? Not sure how that works but I haven't needed to bother looking into it lol

Other sources I've used to watch other BLs are YouTube (there's so many, and they're for FREE), DramaCool, kisskh, and Bilbili.

In this next bit, I'll be summarizing different studios that produce Thai shows, including Thai BL specifically. I'll summarize the studio and then list recommendations for shows.

First up:

GMMTV - (most content on YouTube, some has been put on iQiyi and Gaga though) This is a popular one for Thai shows, and Thai BL especially. It's nicknamed the Disney of BL for a reason (pumps out a lot of new shows each year, huge roster of actors signed to them, very focused on branding and promotion, etc.). A lot of people's first Thai BLs are among their shows, since it was the company that produced the show that launched Thailand's BL industry onto the map. They can be hit or miss with the level of satisfaction, but overall there's plenty to choose from and much to recommend.

Shows I recommend from this company:

Bad Buddy

This is the first one I watched and it changed my fucking life. Pat and Pran are the perfect mix of next door neighbors who were raised to be rivals, but they can't help becoming friends, and eventually fall for each other. It does great subversion of a number of tropes and has a kissing scene that so memorable I bought a t-shirt that's worn in it. The acting is superb and it's both funny and devasting in a lot of good ways. There's a sapphic side couple who are incredibly cute as well!

Be My Favorite

Pisaeng and Kawi, two guys who can't seem to accept their feelings, each live out multiple time lines where they can't help but be drawn together when Kawi is given a time traveling device. This show ponders the affects of one's actions and how living your truth can make or break the happiness you seek in life. This show was unprecedented in how good it was, especially since the leads were an unusual pairing. I love them I love them I love them.

SOTUS

This is the one that kick-started everything back in 2016 for Thai BL. It follows a group of college freshman who are subject to ritual hazing by their seniors, and one student worms his way into the heart of the senior leader. This show set out to censor fags (cigarettes) and not fags (gays). There's so much cultural significance that it's difficult to describe. It sets the tone for a number of BLs to follow.

Not Me

Do you like gays? Do you like social activism? Do you like batshit plots that put you on your fuckin knees for the whole ride? Have we got a show for you. I don't know how to summarize this one without immediately feeling insane, I love this show with all my goddamn heart. Twins Black and White get separated because they have a connection where they can feel the same things when they're close, and it has proven dangerous. Black gets put in a coma and White takes on his identity and joins an anarchist gang to find who hurt his brother. Not everything is what he thinks, though. Also this show inspired my first tattoo because Yok is my favorite boy forever and ever amen.

The Warp Effect

Alright, it's not a BL, technically, but my GOD is it queer. Don't believe me? Here's a list that I made of not even all the reasons why this show is so queer. It addresses so much about sex ed, relationships, consent, kink, body shaming, and even features a non-binary character. A boy, who made a promise to his late mother to save his virginity until marriage, breaks the promise and wakes up in the future. He has to help old friends and acquaintances resolve things that happened on that fated night if he hopes to return to his youth.

3 Will Be Free

Also technically not a BL, but it is poly!! A sex worker, a club host, and the son of a mafia boss end up on the run together after being involved with the wrong people and being in the wrong place...and killing a guy. By the same director of The Warp Effect, so you're guaranteed a similar flavor of thorough queerness.

More shows by the company that I recommend: A Tale of 1000 Stars, Moonlight Chicken, Enchanté, Vice Versa, The Eclipse, My School President, Wandee Goodday, Only Friends, Midnight Musem, The Gifted (those last two aren't BLs but the vibes are there).

Next up!

Idol Factory - (YouTube channel for watching) Founded by actor Saint Suppapong with the purpose of creating a studio that harbors a safer and more positive experience for people in the industry. Well known for producing one of the first and most popular GLs or girls love shows.

Shows I recommend from this company:

GAP The Series

Sam has been Mon's idol since she was little and now she's secured a job working at her company! She's so excited! Until she realizes that Sam is...kind of heartless. Her unwillingness to let her boss walk all over her does more than win over a good professional relationship. It's got all the drama of class divide and arranged marriage along with it, so it's a fun ride and makes for an iconic entry for lesbian cinema.

The Sign

Phaya and Tharn aren't just reincarnated lovers, they weren't even human before! The story follows a curse that's followed them since they first met as naga and garuda, both powerful legendary creatures who have fought each other for ages. In the present, they train as police officers and end up working together in a case related to Tharn's tragic past.

The Loyal Pin

This one actually hasn't started airing yet (August 4th!!!!) but it's about a lady and a princess who grew up together. From the looks of things, it's gonna have drama and angst up the wazoo so I'm looking forward to it.

More shows by the company that I recommend: Secret Crush On You (I haven't personally seen this one but it's been on my list and highly recommended)

Next up!

Domundi - (uncensored versions on iQiyi, cut versions on YouTube) It's more of a "content creator" company, so it includes musicians as well as actors, so there's not many shows under their wing. But they are good with high heat (more explicit) BL stories. One currently airing, Battle of the Writers, includes Chinese wuxia elements which is incredibly interesting and kinda ballsy (there's suspected attempts to lower viewership for censorship reasons). I highly recommend watching it just for the sake of elevating it, there's a cut version on YouTube.

Shows I recommend from this company:

Bed Friend

Poor Uea is traumatized to hell and back; it's like the world is out to get him. He and his coworker King decide after a one night stand to be exclusive fuck buddies, and ngl it's HOT. We get catboy kinks in this one! Their connection deepens and they have to figure out what they both want from each other. Also all the shitheads get owned, it's really nice to watch. It inspired a Jennette McCurdy meme from me.

Middleman's Love

This is the story of Uea's best friend Jade, who sees how happy his friend is in his new relationship, and takes his turn being Emma Woodhouse. Well....it doesn't go to plan. He keeps pushing Mai toward someone else and doesn't realize that Mai likes him. This one starts incredibly goofy (I put that as a warning), and then gets steamy later on.

Battle of the Writers

This one just started airing! Ob-un is accused of plagiarizing fellow author Chan, and after things have been cleared they end up on a writing team together. The wuxia characters here are characters from their novel. It seems their relationship will parallel certain aspects of the story.

Next company!

Wabi Sabi - (YouTube channel for shows) They've recently lost a whole bunch of actors (several to GMMTV no less) due to terminating artist management, so I'm not sure what the future looks like, but they've released several shows that are considered BL staples.

Recommended:

Until We Meet Again

Dean and Pharm are reincarnated lovers who previously had a tragic end. This one is heavy on the emotions, the first 10 minutes took my fucking knees out. Has lot of themes of intergenerational trauma and how important having supportive parents can be. Pharm is so cute, I need to squish him!

Between Us

It starts around the same time as Until We Meet Again, but from the perspective of Team and Win. They have their own angst issues and family traumas that make them messy, and there's a lot more development of the side characters that were featured in the first series as well. I especially enjoy the sideplot for gamers Waan andTul, lol, I wish they could get their own series too! I do recommend watching UMWA first if you don't want to be confused about a few scenes in this one.

Final company, let's go!

Change 2421 - The company that made the omegaverse alpha-alpha car racing BL. That one. Need I say more?

Recommended:

Pit Babe

Mx. omegaverse alpha-alpha car racing BL themself. Babe is a star racecar driver with special abilities. He's charmed when he meets Charlie, but things begin to change for him faster than he can recognize. The home he ran away from tries to force him back as he attempts to reveal its worst secrets.

This Love Has No Long Beans

This is currently airing! Oab is your chef from Kitchen Nightmares that judges harshly with a tough exterior but genuinely has a good heart. Having lost his passion for cooking, he decides to set up a contest to find a successor to take over his restaurant. Plawan chooses to enter this contest despite having no skills and already having gotten on Oab's bad side. Things get heated when Plawan's determination to make it through the competition ignites the passion for cooking again.

There's plenty more companies, but these are the ones I am most familiar with. But there's still more!

Shows I recommend that aren't from the companies listed above:

Kinnporsche

The mafia BL that took over. I have so much brain rot about this one that it's hard to summarize without going crazy. Porsche and his brother have been struggling to keep their beloved family home, so he takes an offer he can't refuse - working as a mafia bodyguard. Kinn, the current mafia head, is undeniably attracted to him and it ends up making them inseparable in more ways than one. I especially enjoy the side couples, VegasPete and KimChay (there is ENDLESS insanity from all possible pairings tbh).

Love in the Air

It's kinda split into two stories, Payu (or Phayu, honestly the spelling gets switched a lot and even I don't stick to one thing) and Rain, and Prapai and Sky. PayuRain are the most couple ever, that's just the best way I can put it. The actors have incredible chemistry and set a fucking standard for making out. Sky and Prapai will make you cry. They handle some pretty intense material and do an incredible job with it. Also bisexuals with motorcycles and light mafia action.

I Told Sunset About You/I Promised You The Moon

Not only an iconic BL series that strives for telling an incredibly realistic story (no goofy sound effects or gags here), but the cinematography is absolutely gorgeous. Also the messiest bisexual awakening known to man. Oh my god. So much crying. Sooooo much angst. It's okay if you throw shit over this one, it's worth it, I promise. Tee and Oh go through pretty much everything that could make weaker couples hate the other person and that's what makes them top tier.

Ingredients

This whole series is a grocery store commercial? Ignore that, these roommates have the most adorable development. I binged this and was crying at 2am. Tops is an aspiring chef and Win is his himbo roommate who is trying to make it as a musician. As they each work toward their dreams, they become important aspects of each other's lives. Also, if you don't come out of this obsessed with Jeff Satur (or anything else he does), I will question your taste. Pun intended.

Old Fashion Cupcake

Japanese BL? Older queers? Office romance? Age gap? A confession scene that meets Jane Austen level standards of desperation? Togawa and Nozue are something else man. They make it a game to pretend to do what young women do as an "anti-aging" technique, but really it's Togawa's scheme to hopefully catch the eye of his boss. Incredible, no notes except maybe I'd like to have a Thai remake? Please?

And last but absolutely not least...

Semantic Error

A fantastic Korean BL. Rivals to lovers and 10000% ADHD4autism. Jang Jaeyoung is prevented from graduating by Chu Sangwoo and makes it his personal mission to get under his skin. And well....it works lol. They're both the most characters, I adore them and their chaotic stumbles into romance. Bonus Choi Yoona bisexual goddess side character, we love her.

Kiseki: Dear To Me

Taiwanese BL that's also split somewhat split between two stories. Zong Yi takes in a wounded Zhe Rui. The student realizes he's keeping a gangster in his dorm and tries to ignore his charms but ends up being drawn into his world. Meanwhile, Ai Di and Chen Yi, other members of the gang, deal with the consequences of Zhe Rui's disappearance.

Well. That was a whole lot. I hope this isn't too overwhelming for you! I've only been in the BL fandom for a couple years so this is barely scratching the surface as far as what's out there.

[lurkingshan]

I’m thinking a lot about the scene between Pran and Tian where they discuss the fight Tian and Phupha are having. Not the fake one about who liked who first, but the real one about Phupha refusing to travel home with Tian or change anything about his life to meet Tian’s needs. It’s a funhouse mirror image of the conflict Pat and Pran are having about how much Pran should let Pat help him, and their long-term dynamic of Pat letting Pran win every disagreement and always being the one to compromise or give in when their needs are in tension.

What I love about it is that Tian doesn’t know anything about their relationship, he’s just (drunkenly) talking about his own experience, and how frustrating and exhausting it is to be with someone like Phupha who never meets him halfway. And Pran is sitting across from this guy who looks like his twin, whose story he has already memorized and connected to, who he now thinks of as a sort-of friend, and he is self-aware enough to see the parallels instantly, and to feel a little embarrassed and ashamed that he is essentially the Phupha in his relationship. And you see him react, just a little, and maybe start to think for the first time about what it must feel like for Pat to yield to him on everything, and never have that reciprocated by Pran.

Reading this wonderful post from @waitmyturtles earlier where she mentioned how she empathizes with Pran, I was also reflecting a bit about where I see myself in this story, and let me tell you, I am such a Phupha. When it comes to how I want to live my life, where I want to be, and how I want to spend my time and with whom, I am uncompromising to a fault. I completely get where Phupha is coming from - I told you who I am, and now you’re telling me it’s not enough. He is frustrated by the idea that he has to change himself for Tian, and I get that, I really do. It’s something I am personally not willing to do. The key difference between me and Phupha, however, is that I am not in love and I do not desire to be in a romantic partnership. He very much is, and very much does.

So what might a guy like Phupha think, as he is struggling so much with the idea of yielding to Tian, when he is met with someone like Pat? Someone who is so like him in some ways - in his strength, his masculinity, his physicality, his confidence, his loyalty, his desire to help others - and yet so unlike him in other ways - his emotional openness, his vulnerability, his comfort with compromise, his absolute willingness to put his pride aside for his lover. Where Phupha is rigid, Pat is versatile, in every sense of the word. There is a lot Phupha might learn from talking to someone like Pat about how he sees his relationship, why he is always willing to bend to Pran’s needs, and why he ultimately feels it’s worth it, even if he sometimes feels some of the frustration that Tian does. Might Phupha have his own epiphany next week, opening up a path for him to finally compromise on something important to Tian?  

@dribs-and-drabbles, I’m not sure how this might fit into your theory about the patterns playing out in these episodes, but I really hope we get to see this happen next week, and watch both of these couples learn from each other’s experiences and find a way to meet their partners in the middle. Because as @waitmyturtles said, this is the work of being in a long term relationship.

In the server with @bengiyo @shortpplfedup @kyr-kun-chan @wen-kexing-apologist we talk often about how amazing it is when romances address what happens to couples after they get together, and how exciting it is that we are starting to see more bl shows about the work of staying together, and I’m so glad that the genius minds behind Bad Buddy and A Tale of Thousand Stars took the opportunity of this special to dig into that so authentically. And to have done it in such a brilliant way, by mixing and matching these characters from beloved shows, putting them side by side and demonstrating how they are similar and also how they can learn from each other, creating a sense of community in this shared universe, and making it all so damn fun along the way, is just an unbelievable treat for us as an audience. Can't wait to see how it all comes together next week.

[bl-bracket]

Most Whipped - Loser's Bracket Round 6: Pat (Bad Buddy) vs Prapai (Love in the Air)

[Submitted Reasons Under Cut]

Pat: Pran fell first, and Pat fell harder. He tries so hard to get thorugh Pran. He was ready to be a secret (though he hates it) even after they were found out. Just for Pran to recover his friends (that Pat don’t even like and find stupid). He announces his love to the entire school (and would do it again) If he's sad, just seeing Pran makes him better. He cannot stop smelling Pran (even before dating). His a puppy after Pat and will do everything he needs in a heartbeat (except being on time xD) He desires so, so much for Pran to be happy!

Prapai: That man would do anything for Sky. He is pure service top.

met sky Once and immediately changed his playboy ways

Prapai is truly whipped. He has a one night stand with Sky and immediately commits his life to winning him over. He takes care of Sky while he’s sick. He hand delivers food for Sky to ensure he’s eating well. He helps Sky with his homework. Sky doodles on his hand and he turns it into an expensive lapel pin just so he can show the world he belongs to Sky. He helps Sky work through his trauma. He even goes as far as to owe the mafia a favour after Sky’s abusive ex comes back into the picture (presumably to have said ex executed). I’m pretty sure after he meets Sky his thoughts consist almost purely about him.

he literally does everything to win over sky and when he said nothing will get in his way he meant it. he didn't stop trying until he had that man agreeing to marry him. he was always there for sky when he needed him and he didn't let sky's past bother him in any way. final point: he would not shut up about sky just.. kissing his hurt finger. he made all that fuss over the tiniest gesture of affection that man is GONE. also when he reassured sky over and over that he wanted all of him and cared about him, and wasnt just there to take advantage of him or his body like his ex. plus have you seen him looking at sky. his pupils turn into hearts

Have you seen him

[chickenstrangers]

Bad Buddy, Tragedy, and Queer Futures

I want to take a closer look at Kwan & Riam and Romeo & Juliet, and the intertextual methods Bad Buddy employs with those narratives. Bad Buddy is an extremely self-aware show and comments on and subverts tropes and expectations of the genres it employs, putting itself in conversation with other BLs, but also romantic comedies and romantic tragedies more broadly. @shortpplfedup has done a much better job than I could do in her excellent Romeo and Juliet analysis series (which was very helpful in getting my thoughts in order), so instead I want to focus on how Bad Buddy plays with the idea of tragedy and explore it through a queer theoretical framework.

Bad Buddy straddles the line between comedy and tragedy. While, as a romance, the audience is primed to expect it will end happily, there is a thrum of tension behind all the jokes and banter. Specifically in the first half of the show, which feels the most rom-com like to me, there's sadness underlying Pat and Pran's interactions. Every time Pat makes a flirty joke, there's a spark of hope in Pran's eyes that he quickly pushes away, knowing or thinking that Pat doesn't feel the same way. It feels like the characters are on a knife's edge, and every little misstep cuts deeply.

The smiley face is an external representation of Pran's feeling (for example, he switches its direction on his door depending on his mood) but it also signifies a choice. He chooses to surround himself with icons of happiness and he chooses to turn the frowny face into a smiley face. People often don't have that much control over the big external things in their lives, but the important thing is adapting and making choices within their circumstances. The idea of choosing happiness is at the core of Bad Buddy.

Pran knows that this will probably not end happily for him. That even if his feelings are reciprocated it might not work. In some ways, his reactions can be read as genre-awareness, part of all the little signs that the show is putting out that this is not your typical rom-com, that it might not have the happy ending that the audience expects. He may not necessarily know that he is in a story, but he anticipates its trajectory. But then Pat comes in and breaks through these genre walls. He's in a rom-com! He's got all the tropes! He falls second but he falls hard and he doesn't have the years and years that Pran has had to build it up in his head.

This is exemplified so beautifully in the rooftop scene and the aftermath of the kiss. For Pat, this feels like the culmination of the story. All good rom-coms end with a kiss. After they kiss, Pat has such a blissful expression on his face, it's pure happiness and belief that things are working out all right in the end. But this isn't the end and Pran knows this. When Pat sees Pran's devastated face, he starts to realize this too.

The post-kiss episodes have a different tone, especially once Pat and Pran actually get together in episode 7. They feel a lot lighter now that Pat and Pran know how each other feel. There's a sense of domestic happiness once they're dating. But the buzzing of potential tragedy and heartbreak doesn't come from Pat and Pran anymore, but from nebulous external forces. This is also when the show starts to signal more and more explicitly that it is a tragedy.

The clearest case for this is the introduction of the school play. The inclusion of Kwan and Riam led to a lot of speculation that Bad Buddy might not get a happy ending, along with P'Aof's comments that they had taken liberties with the source material. Kwam and Riam's story is from the 1936 book Plae Kao or The Scar. The 1977 film adaptation was Thailand's highest grossing film up to that time and it's legacy continues, with two other adaptations in the twenty-first century (for more information and links, see @fiercynn's very helpful post). It tells the story of two star-crossed lovers whose families separate them, and it ultimately ends with both their deaths. Kwan is killed by Riam's brother, and Riam takes Kwan's knife and stabs herself to die alongside him.

Bad Buddy explicitly emulates Kwan and Riam's story. Pat and Pran's story is essentially the BL retelling of the story that the architecture faculty is producing. With the Kwan and Riam narrative shedding new light, we now see that Dissaya sending Pran to a different school mirrors Riam's father sending her away (though it is much darker in the original). Bad Buddy also has direct references to Romeo and Juliet, especially with the balcony scenes and the intense longstanding familial rivalry.

From this point on, Bad Buddy toes the line between whether it will end happily or tragically. But, crucially, the successive near-misses all hint towards the show's final message of queer futurity and queer possibility.

The first act of near disaster comes at the end of episode 8 when Wai pulls back the curtain on Pat and Pran on stage. The fact that this takes place on the set of the play puts it into direct parallel with Plae Kao. Kwan and Riam's story gets transposed onto Pat and Pran's story. They become the actors playing out the story in real life. After this point, we don't see much more about the play at all, other than the curtain call of the performance, we don't see Pat acting as Riam on stage, but we do see them playing out this narrative in real life.

This is the first real test to their dating relationship, but they do not break up. Their friends turn on them, especially Wai, who won't even talk to Pran. Pat suggests they pretend to break up and continue dating in secret (foreshadowing), but that is ultimately unnecessary. Pat's friends only put on a show of abandoning Pat, and Korn quickly reveals he still fully supports his friend. This is the first of a series of misdirects.

The next crisis seems completely anticlimactic, but maybe that's the point. In episode 9, Pat gets shot. It comes seemingly out of nowhere, and then is quickly resolved. We once again have a fake out: the audience is misled to think this is a dramatic event with the way the hospital scene is shot, and Pran is misled by Pat's friends, who play up how hurt Pat is. But Pat is complete fine, the bullet just grazed him. This incident feels very out of place in the narrative of Bad Buddy. Yes, it is an important step in reconciling Pran and Wai, but couldn't this have happened some other way, that didn't involve a random guy who we'd never seen before and a level of violence that the show hadn't prepared the audience to expect?

But what if this was a deliberate allusion to Kwan and Riam/Romeo and Juliet? Here we get the physical injury from those stories' conclusions, Kwan's fatal shooting. Except...its not a big deal. With this scene we get further hints that something else bad might be coming, but we get another sign of tragedy being forestalled. This is further emphasized by the following confrontation with Pat's dad, who is unhappy to see Pran at the hospital, but in the end shows grudging respect for Pran getting Pat's name cleared. Disaster averted.

Then we come to the true brink of tragedy: episode 10 and 11. Pat and Pran find out the real reason their families hate each other, the reason why they are meant to hate each other. At this point they both know that they're not going to be able to stay together and have their families' approval. Running away to the beach feels like a delay of the inevitable. On the beach, they are in a liminal state, a state of paralysis. They have their "honeymoon" but both know there's no happy wedded life to follow.

This calls back to the moment of death in Plae Kao, when Kwan flees into the water after being shot and Riam follows after him, taking his knife from him and stabbing herself while they're both underwater. The waves obscure their death in the film, suspending them in the moment of transition between life and death. This liminality carries over onto Pat and Pran's retreat, which echoes the water motif. This is the scene where Juliet takes the poison, creating the effect of death, though not death itself.

We are back to the beginning. Pran knows this is a tragedy. He's the one who first thinks about going home, even knowing they will not be able to go back together. Pat wants to cling to this little slice of possibility for just a bit longer, but Pran knows that this can't work forever, and Pat knows this too. While Pat is more willing to delay this looming conclusion, they both know they'll have to go home.

Okay, and so what? Romance stories often have a third-act breakup, there needs to be some sort of conflict. What makes this any different from a traditional romance narrative?

When the show was airing, there was a lot of worry that the show wouldn't have a happy ending, or if Pat and Pran did end up in a relationship, it would be after an extended breakup. The show definitely tried to cultivate this response with the inclusion of the Kwan and Riam play and the preview for episode 12. But the show also had put out all these little signals that things weren't as they seemed, and that disaster would be averted once again.

It is important to note that there isn't actually a third-act break up. They never break up! There's not even really any miscommunication. Bad Buddy has been laying clues for the audience, with the multiple bait and switch tragedies, from the curtain to the gunshot. Romeo and Juliet is a tragedy, but a key element of that tragedy is the deception: Juliet taking the poison to fake her own death so that she be with Romeo. But Romeo doesn't know about the lie, and he is tricked as well. Pat and Pran, alternatively, are together in this deception, lying to their families and most of their friends, and in turn, the audience.

They take control of the narrative. They choose what details to share and with whom. When they finally let the audience in on the deception, they do so directly, breaking the fourth wall by narrating their own story.

This is where I'd like to bring in the idea of queer futurity and queer temporality. Queer temporality addresses the idea that queer time operates outside of and in opposition to linear normative institutions and chronologies, and that experiences of the past, present, and future can feel different to queer people. For example, coming of age milestones can take place on different timelines for queer people. Queer futurity looks specifically to the future as queerness's domain. It allows us to imagine a possible world beyond the present, a future that is not yet here. (Shoutout to @shannankle who brilliantly applied this lens to The Eighth Sense and got me thinking about this topic).

Bad Buddy plays with the idea of queer time with the realization of the queer romance. There are two time skips in Bad Buddy (between episodes 6 and 7 and between 11 and 12). Already this creates the sense of delay. Much of Pat and Pran's relationship is characterized by waiting, from the three years when Pran was sent away before university to the four years where they hide their relationship. It wasn't the right time for them then, and it isn't even really the right time for them now. They are waiting for a time to be free, a future that is not here yet, but on the horizon.

Nevertheless, there is an optimistic turn to this waiting; they are facing this delay together. Discussions of queer futurity creates the impression of separation between the present and the future, but here they are holding hands, creating a continuum between these temporalities. This optimism is in direct defiance of the expectations of tragedy, especially as common as it is in queer narratives. So much of queer media does not end happily; however, Pat and Pran do get a happy ending and their story does not end in tragedy like Kwan and Riam's or Romeo and Juliet's.

But its a nuanced ending. The parents don't reconcile; although they are starting to thaw towards the idea of their sons dating, the show ends without the parents talking. But that's not what it's about. It goes back to Uncle Tong's words. As Pat says, "We might not be able to change the people around us, but they couldn't change the two of us either." All they could do was "adjust to it and live happily." They are looking towards a world beyond the present, but while they are waiting, they can still be happy.

Pat and Pran make the choice to have a happy ending. They have a lot of agency in this decision, thwarting familial and genre expectations. It all goes back to the smiley faces Pran surrounds himself, putting himself in a sea of optimism when he isn't necessarily a very optimistic person. It's about the ):) face. That face is also about choice, its about perspective, and how close happiness and sadness are to each other. But Pran chooses to have it be a smiley face instead of a frowny face. Pat and Pran choose to stay together.

Bad Buddy takes two straight romantic tragedies, combines them with audience expectations of queer tragedies, and subverts all of it.

In both Romeo and Juliet's and Kwan and Riam's stories, the lovers die alone. Pat and Pran live together.

Bibliography

Freeman, Elizabeth. Time Binds: Queer Temporalities, Queer Histories. Durham: Duke University Press, 2010.

Halberstam, Judith. A Queer Time and Place: Transgender Bodies, Subcultural Lives. New York: New York University Press, 2005.

Helmsing, Mark E. "Queer Futurity." Encyclopedia of Queer Studies in Education, ed. Kamden K. Strunk and Stephanie Anne Shelton. Leiden: Brill, 2022, p. 518-522.

Muñoz, José Estaban. Cruising Utopia: The Then and There of Queer Futurity. New York: New York University Press, 2009.

Plae Kao. Directed by Cherd Songsri, Cherdchai Production, 1977.

[waitmyturtles]

I was supposed to finally have a quiet moment this week, my first of 2024, to catch up on all the dramas I’m behind on, but alas — real life has gotten in the way, and it’ll still be a little bit before I have time to write big meta again. I’m way behind on thoughts for last week’s episodes of Playboyy, Last Twilight, and Cherry Magic Thailand, but I do very much want to write about them, so some quick notes on these three as follows:

1) I owe @poetry-protest-pornography and @chaos0pikachu my thoughts on camp and Playboyy. I intended to pen this post last week after last week’s episode, but said life (ha) has gotten in the way. Friends, please note that I still SO want to write this, because I think deconstructing why camp as a style works in art will be a wonderful conversation, regardless of the narrative success (or not) of Playboyy.

So, speaking of the narrative success of Playboyy — and the upcoming debate (maybe?) about a balance of style and storytelling in dramas, I watched last week’s episode of Playboyy with this post about The Sign in mind, because I think this post gets at a thing that I want to write more about re: Playboyy, which is, like — what makes a story/narrative contextually coherent, and what responsibilities do the artists behind a show have to viewers to make a story coherent?

I think one thing we were coming to in the conversation on camp at the end of last year was whether or not Playboyy could be considered a good, a successful, or maybe even a complete story by way of its various elements. At least for now, leaving camp aside, I still don’t think this show is working narratively at all. That Captain/Keen storyline had my head spinning — uh, your coach gave you one difficult practice, and you revenge on him by filming a sex tape without consent? How…..did we get there? Porsche now has feelings for Jump? I’m still not grabbing the whole Aob/Puen feelings debacle? The Nant/Nuth storyline has gotten momentum, but not enough to fill the majority of an episode, which is a shame, because it’s the only storyline element giving this show any context at the moment. And as @lurkingshan noted, the only real compelling moment in this episode was between Teena and Zouey about how they’d transcend reality to love better versions of each other. It was lovely to watch! But I’m still not sure why we’re watching all of these storylines and if, ever, they’ll come together in a coherent arc.

So, yeah man. I was so intrigued by the premise of this show. It ain’t workin’. I’ll have more to think on this regarding style. But the stories aren’t coming together — and I TRULY think that’s a shame, considering the important themes of the show.

2) From the little ability I had to poke around Tumblr last week after the last Last Twilight episode, I think (I think!) a general feeling was that the episode wasn’t as depth-y as it could have been for the MANY heavy moments of parental interventions that took place. I believe that’s right. I think there were too many gaps in the contextual flow of the show that left Day’s mom looking more like an enemy (like, even on Pran’s mom’s level) that could have been addressed with a touch more context coming from her.

Let me explain. When I see single moms in Aof Noppharnach shows, I first go to He’s Coming To Me. HCTM has the best BL mom ever — a single mom absolutely ready to embrace her son as he’s coming out.

We know Aof loves depicting moms; he wrote as much about it last year after Moonlight Chicken aired. He’s got some legendary moms — of course, Pran’s mom; Tian’s controlling mom (who I posit is actually a front for patriarchy in A Tale of Thousand Stars); Pat’s passive mom, who is actually way more down with reality than Pat’s dad; Kao’s mom that Kao is so fearful of by way of disappointment. (Special shout-out to Pete’s dad in Dark Blue Kiss as the best BL dad.)

In other words, we know Aof has the goods when it comes to commentary on parenting. We know from episode 9 that Day’s mom (Mhon) went through tremendous hardship to raise her boys, including begging for food. She’s a famous and successful chef by the time we meet her, a workaholic. She’s a single mom, a working single mom, and Porjai is about to be on the same cusp. Night happens to be the bridge to those two.

Mhon’s willingness to keep Day in his room….her ignoring Night to start the Christmas dinner. The taking away of Day’s phone, oof. Saying that Mhok crossed a line — all while she was aware that Day previously had a crush on August. These small points create quite the enemy storyline on Mhon.

This is unfortunate, because I actually felt, watching the episode, that there was a lot about Asian parenting that was being left on the table. Valuing work and the safety of one’s kids OVER their happiness is quite the social phenomenon in Asian parenting. A good bit of Day’s mom’s actions could actually be seen as appropriate by certain-minded parents in Asia.

Yet, to have Day’s mom then ignore Night during the dinner, to have Day’s mom take Day’s phone away without explaining why he can’t be in a relationship — even for an Asian viewer like myself, well used to a particular amount of conditional brutality in Asian parenting — those storytelling decisions seemed a little harsh without more context as to how Day’s mom was driven to be the way she is now.

We had plenty of context into Dissaya in episode 10 of Bad Buddy. That moment opened doors for us to get what the hell was going on. I would love to have a similar contextual moment for Mhon, words by her about her story, that tell us how she got to where she is by way of raising her boys and becoming successful. Despite her behavior to her sons — we know she worked damn hard to provide for them. A badass lies within, and I know a successful Aof show would show us that. I hope we get it.

3) Cherry Magic Thailand, episode 5! I LOVE what’s happening with Rock/Min against the Rokkaku/Minato storyline — I love this expansion, and how Rock is less clueless and much more emotionally vulnerable than Rokkaku. I love feisty Pai. I LOVE Junior’s Jinta! I have to continue covering my mouth as I cackle.

As compared to Adachi at this point in the storyline — I wonder if CMT is offering Achi a bit more of the clueless hand than he deserves. I love the embellishments to the jealousy storyline between Karan and Kurosawa — Achi and Rock pushing off in the boat alone was particularly poignant — but Achi is well aware of Karan’s heart now, and I’m a little surprised that he seems a dash clueless that his interactions with others would make Karan jealous.

This is a minor quibble, though. Achi and Adachi are two dudes unfamiliar with love. But I wonder slightly if this vibe I’m feeling is perhaps a result of the original Cherry Magic Japan story being literally doubled in time in Thailand.

Again — MINOR quibble. This show is a refreshing delight. And I LOVE LOVE LOVE the next part of the storyline. I love that they found a similar place in Thailand to shoot Karan’s drunk flashback scene as Kurosawa’s in Japan. Will Achi offer us Thailand’s version of a classic JBL run? I sure damn hope so!

That’s it! I think I’ll be able to catch up on all of this week’s shows in real time, bless up!

[i-got-the-feels]

Bad Buddy

@taeminie 1

This quote and them and the rooftop scene for "you will never be friends"!!! Big fucking brained Ali!!

@dengswei 1

Pat's face of love and adoration accompanying as to how he loves pran with his every atom and prans face of heartbreak because he looks at him with despair. Perfect lines for them.

@daymork 1

25-21 x Bad Buddy = me shaking screaming and crying. That too a fucking baek yijin quote. The day this doesn't make me insane (it will never happen)

@snimeat 1

Something about how pat pran balance each other no matter where they go, be it whether they are happy or sad. I think the essence of that is beautifully captured with the quote and pictures you chose gei

@pranpat 1 2 3

1 I don't even need to elaborate. The set fucking begins with "we lead two different lives, just like two lines that never cross"

2 Jay, I hope you know you chose violence by combining richard siken and rooftop scene together. I hope you know what you did.

3 "who will come into the kitchen and be hungry for me?" with that expression of pat. Followed by pran saying "I always wanted to cook for someone I like" I am so so so okay

@sunsetandthemoon 1

You beautifully summarized their whole journey and that is why this is here. It's one of the sets that will always make me emotional

Only Friends

@celestial-sapphicss 1

This song describes the soul of the show. This set captures it.

@alienwlw 1 2 3

1) The words!!! With the shots you chose!! Childhood ray in first set!! And happy smiling ray daring to hope for a future with sand!!

2) this set beautifully captures how ray let's himself be used by mew. Because he thinks that's the kind of love he deserves. That's how much love he deserves. Even though he knows he can have more with sand, that is why he selfishly tried stopping sand to move on.

3) delving deeper into Boston's motivations? Yesssss. His sexual escapades as a way to feel human connection? Give me more

@spicyvampire 1

"You're coming down with me hand in unlovable hand" pleaseee Boston does not know how to define love. And the definitions he has are in conflict with the society he lives in. That's why he is alone. That's why he is hurt. Even if he owned up to his mistakes.

@gunsatthaphan 1

The shot of gifs with the words?? Hues of healing with them holding hands in bathtub? Shadows of patience and hours accompanying sands heartbreak of "ray *was* my 25th hour scene? I have said enough

@smileytharn 1

This. Them holding hands. After the initial hesitation. After ray went to sand to apologise and show how much he means to him. Sand acknowledging that and opening up more to him about music - the thing that means most to him. Amazing zey!

@raypakorn 1

A set capturing Ray's Self-destructive nature perfectly not being on the list? Not today, buddy. Not today. Today, we cry at tanies amazing brain and talent in making this set

@sollucets 1

This song and them? Especially the time ray was "confused" over his feelings for sand. Heartbreak. Never thought a bop pop song can cause this much emotional damage. Amazing job love

@icouldhyperfixatehim 1

What I love about this edit is that captures Boston's journey so well. As a friend. Their friendships fallout and reconciliation, or no reconciliation with mew. As a lover, and being left behind because you both no longer have denial as an option and have to escape the fact that you guys are too different in defining love and hence cannot be together.

@sandrayy 1

Listen this quote goes well with sandrayy. Because if anyone understands the value of Ray's tears and will die rather than see ray cry is sand.

Kinnporsche

@dingyuxi 1

This poem is for them okay? "you are too good at violence and he is too good at forgiving" with scenes you chose will always devastate me

@kinnporsche 1

A big hug and chefs kiss to you because the scenes you chose? Episode 4, Episode 5 angst and Episode 7 ending? Yesssss. They burned for each other. Only when did they give in they found solace because they burned brighter together.

@kinnsporsche 1

The scenes you chose!! Kinn giving into his attraction to Porsche and calling him his sun. Him letting go Porsche as moon when he lets him go. And the scene where he tells Porsche how special he is as stars!!!

@alienwlw 1 2 3 4

1) "I let darkness eat the light" + Vegas standing in tears after kan left after inflicting his violence!!!!!

2) holy water scene with pete telling Vegas he is very hungry and needs to be taken care of?????? The big brained energy never ending with you my friend

3) Vegas being vulnerable openly!! The way you beautifully showed his journey to this point where he confesses his insecurities to pete!!! Insane!! Talented!!

4) pete coming to terms with this side of his? The side that craves violence. The side that craves to be dominated. Amazing

@magicaldreamfox1 1

The gif of pete leaving his job to show his support to Vegas. Even when he didn't know if Vegas would survive or not!!! Brilliant BRILLIANT.

@spicyvampire 1

I AM NOT ON MAIN FAMILY'S SIDE. I AM NOT ON MINOR FAMILY'S SIDE. I AM ON YOUR SIDE = TO TO HELL WITH YOU. galaxy brained. No notes. No words. No thoughts. Just AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

@khaotunqs 1

The coloring in the set made me loose it. Black and white with hints of pink? The talent?! Also the quote you chose? Attack on every direction my friend. Mercy please.

@guzhu-furen 1 2

1) a set that highlights a relationship between all the brothers? Ofc i cried. Next question.

2) the fact that even pete didn't know why he went. Until he forced to acknowledge it ofc. The quote is perfect perfect for the scene you have choosen

Between Us

@smittenskitten 1

A parallels of the "be brave for me" scene is made for me. I cry.

Last Twilight

@sandrayy 1 2

1) I have rambled about how the quote goes so well with them in tags and will do again. They both help each other find their purpose. Something they lost along the way by the course their life took. And this existential shit makes me emotional.

2) I love how simple the quote is yet because of the scenes chosen shows the initial flurry of nervousness and excitement when new to liking someone so well

@morkofday 1 2

1) The way they both met each other just days ago but already cherish each other. As individuals. Not as roles they play in each other's life. I cannot.

2) this!! you cannot tell me that when Mork held on to days chin and dismissed the job opportunity they both didn't have horny visions. You cannot. I think you showed their journey beautifully here.

Also love the oranges in both - i d k if its intentional but love that it goes with the shows name so well.

Love In The Air

@bird-inacage 1

The words just hit me whenever I see this set. Love, your writing is beautiful. The font you have used in the set amazing. The scenes you have chosen are perfect. Thank you for this.

@prapais 1

The softness and protectiveness prapai has towards sky. And how even if he isn't a violentan for nature, he wouldn't hesitate for sky. Uff.

Midnight Museum

@daymork 1

I love the composition of the images. Especially the second one. Showing his fate across universes before showing their conversation in third image? The sense of hope that I got after the feeling of futility?? Totally brings across the feelings i have towards the damn articraft.

@alexshenry 1

The coloring of purple and yellow is so fucking dreamy. And something about Kathadome and moon - a universal symbol of hope, of light in darkness??? Amazing my love Nuria

@hoppipolla 1

I am so sorry love. I adore your set because it brings out the universal truth. Time doesn't erase the pain. It's just that we learn to manage it better. Thanks to people around us. The same happened with Katha. I am so glad I found this set

My School President

@pharawee 1

Their friendship!! They will always be there for each other. Gun can be vulnerable with them without worry. Something he doesn't easily do probably cause he doesn't want to worry his mum. But all his friends encourage him to be open and vulnerable. They tell him he is okay and how just because he is strong he doesn't always have to be strong.

@chinzillas 1

Anna!! This edit is one of those forever emotional damage causing arts. It perfectly gets the slice of life, I am growing up. I aam happy but scared to grow up. I am leaving behind the me i currently know. Will I like how I grow to be? How much of it can I control? The anxiety, the home, the excitement, the dreams, the optimism, the hope and the fears we all have as young adults is so fucking beautifully felt in this edit.

Not me

@dimpledpran 1

I cannot believe I discovered this edit so late. The quote is so fucking accurate. And the scenes chosen? Especially for the second gif with tawi??? Big brained energy

@taeminie 1

The scenes you chose for how the kingdom lights shined and one day we will be remembered are PERFECT

@magicaldreamfox1 1

A black and white journey edit in interaction with their parents? Those parents who are people in power and that maintain the very system their kids are revolting against? Delicious

@morkofday 1

I am so glad I requested this set because your badassself delivered. The differences in their ideologies is shown so beautifully here. I cry.

Vice Versa

@ardentlytess 1

Whenever I see this edit, it makes me nostalgic. This is the edit I shall use when persuading my friends to watch vice versa. It captures their journey so beautifully.

@daymork 1

They fell in love with each other without knowing each other's faces. Survived travelling across universe. And had "thank you for being born so that I can love you" so no they aren't ever ending

Never Let Me Go

@shuyis 1

This quote and Palm??? Perfection. He didn't hate his mother for leaving him. Sure he was hurt ans confused but he gave her the benefit of doubt. And when he met her and heard her reason? He accepted her. He loved her. He grieved her loss. He didn't hate his father who left him when he was a boy to go a protect a boy his age. He was concerned for his father's safety and well being. Hell he didn't even hate the boy or boys family. Palm was kind in true sense of the word.

@jyuubin 1

Not tooting my horn but in one of my sets I made for nlmg I wrote a line. It was "if the choice between me and you, it's not a difficult choice at all. I'd always choose you" and I love how this set captured that. Palm didn't give up on him and Nueng even when Nueng became scared and did. He fought for them.

Moonlight Chicken

@maggiecheungs 1

This set inspired me to make my basic-ass set. Need I say more as to how much I adore this?

@jimmysea 1

Heart and li ming don't just see each other. They welcome each other. And the thing about welcoming someone is you understand everyone has their own time of coming to you. They gave each other the time required without rushing the other and the quote you chose just gets this across so well

@raypakorn 1

The damn quote. With Alan. And the scene you chose. "I am on business of loosing your interest". Yeah so okay I am.

@pharawee 1

The neon font just fits so well with the vibe of the show. Light in between darkness. Feeding people at night when people are most tired.

@taeminie 1

The quote goes so so so fucking well with heart and li ming. For heart, li ming is the first person to make accommodations for his need without showing him pity. His gratitude, amazement and love for li ming just come across so well.

The Eclipse

@youdontloveme-yet 1 2 3

The day I am not wrecked over by these 3 sets you made for eclipse is the day you can consider sun has risen from west. What were you thinking while making these? "chasing after echoes" for akk???? "there are only remnants left of you" for Ayan??????

@morkofday 1

The sense of home they give for each other. Akk can keep his fears of inadequacy at rest when with Ayan because Ayan accepts and cherishes him as he is. Ayan can take off his mask of strength off and show his grief and sadness because akk will be there to support him.

To Sir, With Love

@shyishsarawat 1

Listen for a low-heat soap opera? These dudes fucked a lot through their eyes. And when they touched? Yeah that was hotter than any kiss. And i think the quote perfectly captures the tension, devotion, adoration and love they share for each other

@tinnchan 1

Take me to church?????? With to sir with love??? Nads I wish I could say more but my brain just goes AHHHH THIS SONG IS THEM THEY ARE READY TO DIE FOR EACH OTHER THEY ARE EACH OTHER'S RELIGION THEY WORSHIP THEIR LOVE. THEIR RELATIONSHIP IS THEIR SHRINE.

Things to note

These include edits that I found in 2023.

These include edits that gave me the feels.

Thank you for your art. They make the experience of watching the show all the more fun. It helps in appreciating the characters. It helps me see them in new light.

Looking forward to see more of art from amazing artists on here.

To people I didn't tag - tumblr tagging limit sucks. Your art is beautiful simply because it's made. You made it with a feeling and that in itself is beautiful.

Also, the tag is #becauseigtf in case yall wanna tag me in future :)

[pokomumee]

Here’s a PatPran brain vomit no one asked for:

*******

**Pat**

Pat doesn’t think he knows exactly when or how he fell for Pran. Even now, years and years later, he wouldn’t be able to tell you what it was that made him realize that the boy he’d been told to hate all his life is the one for him.

Pa would still make fun of him about how it was her ‘guide-to-know-if-someone-is-into-you-in-4-steps’, which was in fact meant for Ink, that led Pat to realize his feeling for Pran. She even told Pran about it, the little shit. He’d almost kill her, but then Pat really does love his little sister, so. Pran made the most incredulous face and laughed it off, though he would still bring it up sometimes when he wants to drive home the point that Pat is the clueless idiot in their relationship. Which, there’s actually never really any need to drive home that point, Pat already knows, okay?

In his defense, Pran also has not told him in so many words about how and when he fell for Pat either. However, because they have been together for almost a decade now, he has an inkling that Pran realized his feelings for Pat way earlier than him. Like, way, way earlier, maybe even before he was shipped away to boarding school (the dark age of Pat’s life, now that he looks back on it). Pran never confirms nor denies this hypothesis of his, but. Like he said, he has an inkling.

The fact that Pat never noticed anything until that fateful night on the rooftop when Pran asked him if he wants them to be ‘friends’, that single tear rolling down his cheek, the most beautiful thing Pat’d ever seen in his 18 years on the Planet…well, he knows, okay? He’s the clueless idiot, he knows. Every time Pat thinks about how much his cluelessness must have hurt Pran, his heart would clench up with so much guilt he wants to introduce his head to the nearest brick wall, multiple brick walls if they were readily available, one wall would never be enough.

So, yes, Pat tries not to think about when or how Pran fell for him, which might be the reason he finds himself wondering instead about when and how he fell for Pran. He thinks it might also be because their 10-year-anniversary is coming up, although to be completely honest with you, as a couple they still cannot agree on when the start of their relationship actually was. Pran says it should be the day Pat showed up unannounced to surprise him as Riam at the architecture play practice when everything became official. Pat thinks it should actually be when the bet started because, really, who were they even trying to kid? Anyhow, he guesses there’s the first clue as to how he may never find out when the actual moment of his falling for Pran was.

*******

Pat’s life had always revolved around Pran from the very beginning, arguably even before his life started, if their mothers fighting over which of their sons would have the prettier girlfriend while they were still fetuses count. How the sons in question end up with each other instead of a pretty girl is most certainly the Universe’s middle finger to both their families for being so petty, but he digresses. Pat maybe clueless but he is aware that he’d always held a myriad of strong, no, vicious feelings towards the boy next door. Pat has never claimed to be an analytical type (that’s all Pran) and has always gone with his instincts, so obviously, he wouldn’t have any idea if one of those feelings were attraction, infatuation, love or just…some other visceral emotions. There were too many candidates, okay? Go look up the Emotion Wheel, go on, Pat will wait.

For some time, Pat was convinced the moment he fell for Pran was the moment in the music shop after the fiasco that was his and Pa’s attempt at testing out her 4-step-rule on Ink. In hindsight, though, that was possibly just the moment his feelings toward Pran became apparent to himself. And by apparent, Pat means too uncomfortable not to notice. He even thought at first that what he was feeling that day was frustration he felt towards not getting through to Ink. But then he realized that his eyes never really fallowed Ink, and his heart was definitely never with her after they’d reconnected in university. He really did crush on her in high school, sure, he wouldn’t deny that. However, the second time around, Ink was somehow a welcomed distraction from the real sight his eyes were wont to follow, the topic his brain kept switching to, and the person who made his heart feel that little bit off kilter on the daily.

It should have been pretty straight forward what those feelings were if it wasn’t Pran who was at the center of all the muddled pool of events and emotions. Pran who’d always been at the center of most, if not all, of Pat’s life-defining events and the object of Pat’s obsession for the entirety of his life. How was Pat supposed to distinguish attraction from the sea of everything he held inside of himself for that boy. Even Pran’s dimples were confusing to him, for crying out loud. Pran’s door hanger made it a little easier to gauge his mood, but not by much.

Pran was an enigma, the ultimate differential equation Pat had to solve. He just couldn’t figure out for the life of him why. Pat did ask himself whether it’d always been this way even before. And it wasn’t. He can’t say for sure, but for now, at least, he doesn’t think so. He thinks back on it and resolves that it was most likely because before Pran was pulled out of their high school and Pat’s life, Pran’d always been a constant. Pat’d never consider the possibility that Pran would one day disappear in the same vein that he thought Pa would always be in his life. So, in his defense, it’s only logical that Pat’d feel differently about Pran after, even though he did not understand why, alright?

So, yes, Pat doesn’t know and probably will never know for sure so he'd just have to make a decision, and he decides that the moment he fell for Pran was going to be when Pran kicked him in the chest, right over his beating heart. It’s totally and aptly poetic, really. Because that’s when Pran walked back into his life and everything changed.

Like he said, Pat’s well aware he’d always felt strong emotions towards Pran. But that’s just how he was raised, how they were raised. Pat was made to be in tune with Pran, the boy whose bedroom was across from his but he was forbidden to talk to, but then climbed over to sneak inside uninvited more times than he can count anyway. Pran’s every achievements were also the milestones of Pat’s very own life. From the first time his baby self uttered the word ‘Ma’ to that moment Pran was whisked away right before his eyes, in the middle of their song, from their very first stage together. Talk about being dramatic.

His high school years thereafter were not miserable by any means, if he were to be honest. But something fundamentally changed within him when Pran went away. Pat was expectedly and obviously clueless to that change inside of him, it’s the running theme of his life, he supposes. But then everything started to feel dull, like he was looking at the world through a tinted glass; the sceneries became monotonous, boring. He did not realize this until the moment the words came out of his own mouth that night on the rooftop, but yeah, he felt depressingly lonely without Pran. His grades, and even sports performances, started suffering for a while, just because he stopped trying or even caring. It wasn’t fun anymore to excel in everything if Pran wasn’t there for him to compete with. But of course, his Dad wouldn’t let him slack off, so Pat got back on track to becoming the golden boy that he was, but. Nothing was ever the same.

There’d also been this simmering rage inside of him since Pran went away. Pat thought it was normal back then. After all, he was just another hot headed teenager, hormones and all. And he was never violent or anything like that. It was just…he felt on edge all the time. There was always an urge to lash out at something. A little pit of smoldering coal inside his chest, black and ugly, not erupting into flames yet refused to ever be put out. He didn’t know what it was, but looking back he was probably angry at…at what?…his and Pran’s parents? the Universe? for taking Pran away, maybe. Now that Pat thinks about it, though, he was probably mostly angry at himself for not being able to do anything about it. So yeah, he got himself into more and more fights, usually for valid causes, albeit sometimes only vaguely. He’d never actually got himself into serious trouble; he was clueless, not stupid. However, Pat was on a trajectory…and it wasn’t a pleasant one. He isn’t sure where or what he was heading towards, luckily he didn’t have to find out.

Pran walked back into his life, and by walk, Pat means running in with a flying kick to his chest, shocking his heart into beating properly again. The simmering rage gradually dissipated, and Pat stopped feeling like he wanted to punch someone or something for no reason all the time. Except for Wai, yes, but that was totally reasonable.  Even Wai would agree.  Maybe not. But you get the picture

Pat still remembers the moment he got up from the ground, clutching at his chest and saw Pran standing there. Suddenly memories of his life with Pran came pouring back. You know how people who’s gone through near-death experiences say their lives flash before their eyes? It was like that, only Pat felt the opposite of dying. His senses were at once on high alert. Alive. Pran was back. He was here. And no one has ever been able to keep Pat on his toes like Pran did. Ever. So Pat isn’t dramatizing the event of that day or anything. But even if he did, this was the moment he fell for the love of his life, he can be as dramatic as he likes, okay?

[neuroticbookworm]

*deep breath* FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

Alright, I'm gonna make my case for the Bad Buddy Rooftop Kiss. This is probably gonna be the most personal I've ever been on this hellsite.

Let's get this out of the way. I loved Kinnporsche. I honestly did (even though it might not look like it since this is the second time I'm passionately campaigning against the show). I loved it so much that I made my very busy best friend, @tonysteve25 who is planning their wedding, make up the time to talk to me so I can rant for two hours about the show (no need to judge me, I know y'all are equally crazy)

I'm gonna strip the plot to the basics and then build my argument, so if I end up reiterating a lot of themes that are already discussed, apologies in advance

Bad Buddy is, at its core, a Romeo and Juliet retelling. Set in a fairly conservative Asian country, and produced by a media industry whose brand of storytelling often involves an AU-esque setting where homophobia does not exist. We are shown time and again that Pat and Pran's friends and family do not have a problem with them being in a same-sex relationship.

So the conflict comes from the history their families have with each other. As a South Asian cinephile, I've watched this trope play out so many times with heterosexual couples that I'm sure it has unwittingly become a part of my brain chemistry. Oftentimes, the reasons why the families are feuding are so over the top that every shred of relatability gets thrown out the window.

In Bad Buddy's case, the reason is kept simple, albeit childish in the beginning. A business rivalry between the two families, and as a result, the boys are also pitted against each other. This simplicity gives way to a lot of levity in the beginning, but as the story progresses, the real strength of this narrative starts seeping through. This show is relatable. Almost too relatable.

The constant pressure to outperform the other in every way, be it academics, sports, or romance; the expectation on Pat to follow his dad's footsteps and match his achievements, even in a dumb singing competition; the guilt that permeates every moment of joy they feel in their relationship, because they are always aware that they are actively disappointing their parents; the quiet, painful realization in the later episodes that they will never be accepted into each other's families, no matter how hard they try; the revelation that the root of the conflict came from a scholarship stolen from a woman, to satisfy the expectations of a patriarch.

Every statement above is the reality of so many Asians living their lives right now. I personally know couples who have been cut off from their families for over 20 years because they don't approve of their love/marriage. I have peers who blindly follow the career path charted for them by their parents because it is easier than resisting and doing something they actually like. A lot of us are left feeling unmoored and struggling to define our self worth in the real world, after we leave academia, because that is all we are ever taught: your grades indicate how worthy you are.

Now, I know not a single word above argues why the kiss is the best, but I'm getting there. Stay with me now. Many people more talented than me have argued the specifics of the kiss, the reasons why it grabbed us by our throats the first time we saw it, and why we are still on that rooftop with them. The reasons submitted in the poll describe it so eloquently, beat by beat (edit: I found out that it was witten by @tiistirtipii, here). @respectthepetty begs us not to disappoint Pat again here, @lurkingshan dives deep into the character analysis and why the kiss is the perfect culmination of narration, pacing, and the characters' journey here, @waitmyturtles explores the importance of foreplay, the 'how did we get here' before the kiss, here.

What I want to draw attention to are two things. One: how this kiss was executed in such a way that all of their deeper struggles are woven into the microexpressions, so when you rewatch the show, all of the added context makes it so much more heartbreaking.

Let's be clear here, Pat and Pran did not get a happily ever after. They did not break all of the chains that were weighing them down. Pat went on to follow his father into the business (who also followed his father into it). They have to keep their relationship a secret, with no end in sight. Even in the end, the audience is shown only a hidden, reluctant acceptance from the parents, not an open love.

Pat and Pran's relationship will always be bittersweet. And the kiss shows it. The fact that the kiss was the very last shot to be filmed is no coincidence. The actors know how it ends, they have already performed it. They also know that the characters in this moment know it too. They have lived all their lives playing their families' games, they know that if they take this leap of faith, then they are willingly giving up so many little moments in life, even something so mundane as entering each other's house through the front door. And we can see it, see all of it clearly in Pran's face. Pran, who plans every detail of his life. Pran, who is also in love with his rival for who knows how long. And then we see it in Pat's face too, if only after a moment, because that's the way he is. Pat, who has looked at Pran all his life as a rival, a bandmate, a secret friend. Pat, who is the only one who can completely understand Pran, his anger and grief and devastation, because they only have each other in this wretched game. We see his face fall, and we see confusion cloud his happiness.

This kiss is the perfect summation of their relationship, shown at the very beginning of it. They can have desire, but be riddled with guilt. They can have happiness, but only in secrecy.

Two: how this kiss did more for Asian queer representation than we can ever comprehend.

I was not present in the Tumblr trenches with y'all when the show originally aired, but I've read many, many posts about how it broke the internet. Western media often fucks up queer characters because they don't write fully fleshed out characters who happen to also be queer. They place enormous emphasis on the character's queerness, and end up writing a stereotypical cardboard cutout in the shape of a queer person. Complex queer representation is hard to come by, add Asian into the mix and the pool gets laughably small.

In the episodes leading up to the kiss, we see the characters get fleshed out, their struggles explored, but they are also deeply rooted in the middle class Asianness of it all. I know it is ironic to say that other shows from Thailand are less Asian than this one, but the struggles of a queer mafia boss/rich businessman/heir to the corporate throne protagonists can sometimes be a tad out of touch for the general populace, and we can only feel so much nostalgia for our school days before we are tired of the saccharine sugar high.

When I saw this kiss for the first time, my eyes teared up, not because these gay characters are having a hard time, but because I could feel their pain, irrespective of my sexuality. I knew deep in my bones how a kiss can simultaneously feel like freedom and a lifelong trap. And I'm sure so many others felt it too. The kiss went viral because it was a perfect representation of so many struggles of Asians and the diaspora (and beyond), and it happened to be queer.

I don't know how the results will tally up when the clock runs out, but I hope we can chalk up a honest-to-goodness happy ending for them, if only in a silly Tumblr poll.

cc @bl-bracket, here ya go, a very long and rambling campaign propaganda

[grapejuicegay]

A... rather personal defense of Pran

I've seen a lot of people being confused about Pran's behaviour and rather upset by him. But like @waitmyturtles said in their review, "I see Pran dealing with something really complicated." Which, yes. That's what this post is about. I just don't think it's about Singapore.

It's about Pran's OCD. I think there was a consensus last week with the way Pran talked about it that it was a recent diagnosis. And I think this episode just confirmed that for me.

This is where the personal part begins - I was diagnosed with OCD in 2020, in the very first few months of covid. When I told people about it I got about the same response that we had to Pran - it's not surprising but it's good that it's an official diagnosis now.

Such a diagnosis is almost a relief when you get it because suddenly a lot of things start making sense. But it also comes with a very fun challenge - learning to deal with it. Because while you understand why you get so much more anxious and overthink more than most people, you're also suddenly more aware of your thought patterns. You have to be, to find a way to work through them, to not give into the intrusive thoughts. But looking at the intrusive thoughts is one of the best ways to let them take over. You do have to look at them though, because you have to learn to recognise them. Because you cannot deal with them until you do. It's a rough cycle.

I was a few years older than Pran when I was diagnosed, and in a very different place in my life. The pandemic that we didn't know a lot about at that time looming over our heads did not help my anxiety, but the lockdown gave me something really special - time and space to work through it all. I wasn't in college so I didn't have the constant looming threat of deadlines and figuring out my future in that very moment. I also didn't have the very unique set of stressors Pran lives with - friends and family from whom you're hiding a relationship that if revealed could potentially lead to very severe consequences, consequences that in the past have been the worst of his anxieties come to life. Nor a relationship to maintain while being overtly aware at all times that this is not the kind of relationship your partner would really want, that they're only in this because of you.

And there is the sacrifice of it all. There is the thing that keeps coming up again and again - that Pat does so much for him. That Pat helps him all the time, that Pat's sacrificed so much for him, that Pran isn't sure he's good enough or ever will be.

Add to that the regular reminders from Pat that he overthinks. They're meant in a very good way and they do help in the moment, I'm not denying that at all. But it's also a fact that Pran struggles with. It adds to his concern that he's a burden on Pat with the way he thinks, that Pat has to do so much work because of Pran's brain, something Pat had no say over (something Pran had no say over but it's harder to see it like that in the moment).

I've had my diagnosis for the past 3 years now. And it hasn't been until the past year that I've finally started feeling confident in myself and my ability to regulate my anxiety, to finally start feeling like I have control over my brain. Because as much as knowing the diagnosis helps, the work you have to do afterwards is no joke.

So yes, Pran is going through something very heavy, but it's not the prospect of going to Singapore (I don't believe that exists just yet, but it's coming soon). Pran is in the process of figuring out how to make his brain work in his favour instead of actively against him. He's learning to rely on people when he needs to while fighting off constant reminders that he's a burden.

And we've seen Pran make a lot of progress. Any points at which he talks about being anxious are progress. Any time he lets himself be upset is progress. Any time time he says any of his worries out loud (even if he can't say them directly to Pat yet), he has fought his way through who knows how many intrusive thoughts to get to that point. And in the same regard - he probably feels guilty about having Pat say "I can't live without you" first. Because he's likely just as aware that Pat has done so much for him that this is just another thing he's adding on top of that.

But - and I think this is very big - he knows that he needs Pat to say it first, to give him permission to feel this, that this isn't too much for him to ask for. This is him asking for help to express himself when he feels like too much. It helps them both in the long run. And I do think it's a very important step to get what we saw in ep 12 - a Pran that demands love, that demands to be babied. This is him giving himself permission through the hardest part of learning his diagnosis.

I love that we get this between ep 11 and 12 because with this ep 12 also becomes a hug, a way of telling us things may be rough for him but he gets through it. He'll get where he needs to be, wants to be. Just give him some time. Because just like with the parents, sometimes time is just what you need.

[itwoodbeprefect]

Fic Writing Review 2024 🌈

i did this last year and tagged a bunch of people, and this year i'm going to continue the tradition but not tag anyone, i think, because i'm very late. but if you're reading this and you've posted anything to ao3 in 2024, consider yourself tagged, and please tag me if you still do it! i'd love to see other people's lists!

for me this was, uh. probably my least productive year since i really truly made the switch to english fic (2018), and it's definitely no 2019, when i posted 56 fics. but not every year can be a 2019 (or should be one, frankly), so that's okay.

-

Words and Fics (on ao3) 📚

words posted: 18,404

fics posted: 12! of which 2 were technically late crossposts from starsky & hutch fandom events in 2023 (though i also wrote a 2024 s&h advent calendar fic that is yet to make it to ao3, so if we really do the math we maybe get to 11 finished works. but i'll stick with those 12 posted within the timeframe for the rest of this, for convenience's sake, and because 1 fic per month makes a nice round average.)

first fic: With every guitar string scar on my hand, a bad buddy pat/pran fic, on jan 24th

last fic: By Heart (or: Memorization hacks for the smitten idol), a thame-po heart that skips a beat fic (which is, well. thame/po), on dec 28th

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Ships and Fandoms ⚓

according to ao3:

Starsky & Hutch (5)

แค่เพื่อนครับเพื่อน | Bad Buddy: the Series (TV) (3)

Hawaii Five-0 (2010) (2)

เธม-โป้ Heart That Skips a Beat | Thame-Po: Heart That Skips a Beat (TV) (1)

บ้านหลอน ON SALE | Peaceful Property (TV) (1)

the most shocking thing here by far is that there are only two (2) h50 fics on this list. it doesn't even feel that way! i still spent a really good chunk of time thinking about h50 fic, it just didn't amount to much in terms of actual finished products. starsky and hutch is still going strong (relatively speaking, at least), and last year i noted that i wished i'd gotten any of my bad buddy projects posted, which clearly sort of worked out for me this year, though there's still More. the other two are two thai series that took me by surprise, which, hey, fingers crossed that will keep happening, because i really need to start writing some fic again about things i'm actually currently watching. it's good for the soul i think.

-

Top 5 Fics by Kudos 🏆

Ain’t no other that can sweep you up like a robber [h50]

Meet me at the edge (I’ve already fallen) [h50]

Sun down and I’m feeling lifted (Downtown, cherry lipstick) [bad buddy]

With every guitar string scar on my hand [bad buddy]

By Heart (or: Memorization hacks for the smitten idol) [thamepo]

h50 is easily outpacing everything else, with both of those way at the top here. what i like is that the ink/pa bad buddy fic extremely comfortably landed the third spot, with almost double the kudos of the pat/pran fic that's in fourth place. the world craves femslash i guess! along with a host of other, more likely factors (it probably has a more catchy description, it's tagged for both ships because patpran still show up, possibly more people in 2024 were looking for fic for characters played by milk and love because they're still actively working together, etc), but wouldn't it be nice.

the thamepo fic (which is thame/po. it never stops feeling a little goofy to explain the ship when it's in the title, but you could of course be writing other things anyway) taking the fifth most kudo'd spot came as a bit of a shock, but honestly, i've written for so many Smaller Fandoms in 2024 that it's not actually very odd. it's my most recent posted thing but this show is currently airing and seems to be getting a decent amount of traction, so it has the benefit of being current.

my kudos total for all 12 fics i posted this year is as of writing this at 1,235, and there's a stark contrast in this being about ~700 kudos below 2023's How to build a triangle (ted lasso, jamie/roy/keeley) all by itself. i did NOT hop into any ted-lasso-at-its-peak sized fandoms in 2024.

-

Top 5 Favorite Fics 💖

well! the upside of writing 12 fics is that i can put, like, over two-fifths of them on this list. in no particular order:

By Heart (or: Memorization hacks for the smitten idol) - i mean, i think today's episode of, uh, Thame-Po: Heart That Skips A Beat may have pushed this fic a little farther from following canon than it originally seemed (apparently thame was not aware of his own lurking romantic feelings for po, at all. oh my god) but i had a fun time writing this! it's short and not very specific and i enjoy the repeated number thing. (this kid was really rushing across the city to ask to memorize the number of a guy he apparently assumed he was just trying to be friends with. i do love him very dearly already, gosh.)

The name of the game - this is starsky/hutch and i think it's sort of sneaking in here! i was just happy this was a Complete Fic when i posted it (it had all the necessary parts, so i was sending it off), but then people were SO sweet about it in SUCH overwhelming numbers that it's probably a huge part of how i fell back in love with it myself. that's always a little magical to me. also: the sisyphus line about starsky may be my favorite thing i posted in 2024.

Rest your heart easy - also starsky/hutch! but less of a surprise. this was written for the ShareCon 2023 zine, and i don't reread it very often, but when i do it's like, yeah! i'm glad it was this fic of mine that got to participate in the zine. it's nice, it's warm, it flows.

Sun down and I’m feeling lifted (Downtown, cherry lipstick) - the bad buddy ink/pa fic! this sounds so silly when saying it about a thing that took over my life for a few months and still makes me drop to the floor when i see one (1) scene for whatever reason and am immediately attacked by the memory of how much i love it, but i'm REALLY still figuring out how to write these characters. they are my best friends and i have no idea who they are, apparently. but i like the attempt i made here, and i think i might like it more than both of the finished pat/pran focused fics, though that could be purely because i reread those far too many times in trying to Get It Right before hitting post. also. i like ink and pa! and they deserved to kiss. (and on that note, it's 2025, why is there still such a strict dividing line between GL and BL in nearly all cases? let the girls and boys hang out together, please. i won't pretend that if bad buddy could do it then everyone can (those are entirely unrealistic standards in most cases), but they could at least try.)

Home goes where the heart is - this is a peaceful property fic that is only vaguely peach/home shippy. (peaceful property being, on all levels that count, not BL.) in hindsight, i think i should have gone with one of my alternate title options and called it Pang pang! It’s a Home invasion! (because one of the characters is called pangpang and another one is called home), but hey, this slightly more serious title is fun too. i'm not even sure this is necessarily one of the best things i wrote in 2024, but it just makes me happy. there's a second peaceful property fic of which i wrote most on the night that the finale aired, but then it got longer than intended and it ended up stuck in limbo. but i still have hopes that i may give it an ending one day, because these characters in their weird kind loud ghost & cooking show that made me cry several times really deserve it (and i think there are some funny lines in the wip, and if there's one thing that makes me want to see a fic finished, it's a joke that the world should be able to read).

-

Fandom Fic Events 🤝

it's not on ao3 yet (i may do that soon-ish), but my fic for this year’s Starsky & Hutch Advent Calendar, The Simple Things! if starsky and hutch is your jam, don't forget to look at the rest of the calendar too!

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Projects for 2025 👀

hmm, well. hmm.

2024 was an incredibly chaotic year for me, writing-wise. i'm not entirely sure what i was doing or where i was going, and i wasn't extremely motivatived to figure it out, because i was doing other things. (like figuring out how to write thai letters, for example.) i think if i want to write more, then part of my 2025 has to be to read more fiction, because it's truly just, like. words need to go in for words to come out.

i REALLY want to get a flip-flop state of mind finished up for real this year. i want to get better at/allow myself more slack to just type up something short and quick and probably not too deep, rather than feeling some need to turn every single wip idea into a months or years long project. those are great too! i love chipping away at a fic for an eternity, and the beauty of hobby writing is that there's no reason not to still do that, too! but i also need to keep things moving a little bit so i don't get stuck in a loop of looking at the same words which don't inspire me anymore and not adding anything, which also doesn't get me anything new to jump off from tomorrow.

so. write some h50 fic. write some starsky & hutch fic. write a bunch of thai series fic (and allow myself to play some jazz when it comes to character voices, because i still keep getting stuck on that too often. it's fine if they're My Version, that's what fic is). maybe something else, if i feel like it? my project for 2025 is Fun, and it would be really neat if i could get 13 fics (or more) posted (to get that yearly number moving back up again), but if not, that's also fine.

honestly maybe what i need in terms of fandoms is something in thai which is also queerbait (or queercoding), because that's where i'm at currently + what historically is best at getting me to write. i've heard a lot about high school frenemy, and i only keep dodging it because it has high school in the title, but hey, who knows! maybe watching two men who are 26 and 27 play high schoolers in some sort of feud who are obviously in love but don't kiss about it will fix me.

[impala124]

Bad Buddy Ep 7

My thoughts on Ep 1 | Ep 2 | Ep 3 | Ep 4 | Ep 5 | Ep 6

Me, at the end of this episode:

Happy to see that Pran had toned down his flirting, still thinking about him licking Pat's finger and probably would never stop thinking about it, and is back to his usual bantering with Pat.

Pat has a new car and a new boyfriend. You know what that means!! CAR MAKEOUT SESSIONS WITH BOYFRIEND!!!🤞

Pa is coming to university. Hopefully, we'll get to see more of her.

Me, when Pran's mom said that he can bring anyone home, boy or girl, as long as it isn't the boy next door:

Pran apparently has only two modes when it comes to flirting with Pat: snarky and horny. I'm sure Pat appreciates them equally.

Now, I've been a freshman and met many helpful seniors in college, but no one was holding my hand to escort me to a gathering on my first day. Anyway, Pa and Ink are interacting, guys!

Ok, Pa is sharing a dorm with Pat. I like the idea of it, but given that the (flirting) games are on, I don't want Pa to see anything she doesn't need to.

Pat's dad is again doing the most with his "Don't ruin my reputation." Sir, please. Just stop.

Pat looking at Pa's note from her peer mentor and saying that it's from a guy is funny because my boy is talking out of his ass here. Remember the time he looked at Pran's note and thought that a girl wrote it? Yeah, your track record isn't great when it comes to this sort of deduction, bestie.

Product placement interwoven into the plot—bring this back.

Pran's "I want you to do it for me" while asking Pat to change your printhead is just ASDGHGKYH.

Pat, expectedly, folded like a wet napkin. Pat is God's strongest soldier for resisting Pran's brand of flirting, is all I'm saying.

Ink, the badass that you are!! We got a head pat. Holding hands and head pats, I smell something in the air.

Not them holding hands in secret at the bus stop, which exists as proof of their coordination. Snack deliveries, my beloved!!!

I'm just here losing my mind visualizing Pat going to Pran's room with Nong Nao in hand for a sleepover. I wonder who even initiated the conversation, though. Was it Pat casually showing up at Pran's doorstep with Nong Nao in hand, or was it Pran inviting Pat for a sleepover and Pat showing up with Nong Nao in hand? I NEED TO KNOW. How dare they deprive me of this conversation??!!

Shirtless Pat makes an appearance again. The tickling!!!

PA ALMOST WALKED IN ON THEM. Remember when I said Pat rooming with Pa wasn't a good idea in practice? Yeah, this is what I was talking about. Not Pat saying that he's doing a side pack workout 😭😭😭.

Okay, Wai having a crush on Pa will be interesting for sure.

Ink is just not having it with Pat's extra attention!!

One thing I know for sure is that no one who bet against Pran has lived to tell the tale.

Pat, my lost puppy, is here to cheer up his cranky boyfriend. Even Pran can't resist that beautiful face!! The chemistry is electrifying.

Wai is such a manipulative asshole for forcing this responsibility on Pran. He brought back the guitar because he knew that he could coerce Pran into agreeing to his plan.

All the playfulness has left Pat; my boy is feeling dejected now, and Pran is at a loss of words as to how to explain his side of the situation. I'm hurting for my boys.

The rooftop rendezvous!!! They know each other a bit too well. Pran, with his "We'll never reveal our feeling if nothing forces us to do so," is just exposing himself. Speak for yourself, bestie; Pat isn't like you.

Pat coming to Pran's rescue again, when Pran seems to have lost all hope.

Yes, cheer for your man, Pran. Pat's "If my victory puts my boyfriend in trouble, I'd rather lose" got me giggling and kicking my feet like a teenager.

Oh man, the romance is romancing for sure!! Pran fed Pat the curry, the one he wanted to feed to the person he likes!!! So, they both won❤️.

Sparing a thought for Pa's bladder, though. But in the grand scheme of things, what's a pesky little UTI in front of 'soulmates' declaring their love for each other? I think Pa would be happy with the trade-off.

As I said before, Pa is a child of (PatPran's) divorce—

She had to put up with Pat wreaking havoc with his drums in the house during their breakup era.

She moved in with Pat and almost walked in on them during their 'we're trying to get back together' era.

She (her bladder) is being neglected during their makeup era.

There is something to be said about Pat's very public declarations of love (the cute dimples slide in front of the whole class, using the audition for the play to flirt with his boyfriend and him agreeing to play the lead) for Pran done in a concealed manner.

Tagging the usual suspects: @shortpplfedup, @incandescentflower, @starryalpacasstuff, @7nessasaryevils, @greenteadumplings, @grapejuicegay, @madworld-bbs, @usodeshou, @tao-moonb, @fanatic-freakshow . If anyone wishes to be tagged in the future, let me know.

[talistheintrovert]

the urge to compare Dangerous Romance to Bad Buddy is strong, because there ARE parallels, but I would argue that those parallels actually do a really good job of highlighting the differences.

On the surface, they're both enemies-to-friends-to-lovers stories, where one half is a loud, brash, emotionally illiterate idiot (who isn't as much of an idiot as he pretends to be) and the other half is a reserved, bitchy, intelligent person who starts pining first and keeps it to himself.

but that's about where the similarities end. Because Kang is not Pat. And I mean that both (affectionate) and (derogatory). Affectionately because Kang is his own person with his own characteristics, he's not just a copy of a different character. And Derogatorily because, well. Kang was a BULLY three episodes ago. Pat could be a dick, sure, Pat picked on Wai, absolutely, but Pat would never bully somebody below him. He picked on Wai because he figured it was fair game. Kang pretty much EXCLUSIVELY picked fights with people lower than him, people he thought as lesser. He exerted power over them. And just because he seems to have stopped doing that now doesn't mean that didn't happen, and it especially doesn't mean that Sailom has forgotten it. Because SAILOM WAS ONE OF HIS VICTIMS.

which brings me to my next point - Sailom is not Pran. Sailom isn't just a rival, he was BULLIED by Kang, and he might have forgiven him for that now that they're friends but he can't *forget it*. You see it in that scene where he flashes back to the bullying when Kang offers him a lift on the back of his bike. That power imbalance plays a large part in making their relationship speed up and then slow right back down in these last few episodes.

But that isn't the only thing holding Sailom back, it's also their complete economic disparity. Kang is wealthy and Sailom is poor and in danger of being hurt because of debts he shouldn't have to be responsible for and every episode goes through great pains to remind not just us but THEM of the massive gap between them. Sailom is hyperaware that he can't think of anything except earning money, he doesn't have the time or energy to waste on somebody who doesn't like him back, so you see him, over and over again, shutting down any feelings he might have for Kang. Unlike Pran, who lets himself pine because it's the only thing he CAN do. Pran doesn't think he has a chance with Pat but he's allowed to love him in private, so he does. He yearns and he cries and he resigns himself to that fate. But Sailom can't even do that. He won't let himself.

People keep saying that Chimon isn't selling their chemistry as much as Perth but honestly I think that's INTENTIONAL. Sailom can't have what he wants and he KNOWS this. He's ALWAYS known this, it's just the reality of his life, and it's obvious in the way he talks. Even when Kang asks him what career he wants, he says engineering, but only a full half-episode later does he reveal that that isn't really true. But it's true to him, it has to be, because it's his only option. So even if he likes Kang he has to tamp it down constantly to avoid falling into the trap of having hope that Kang could ever like him back. He's always making a conscious effort NOT to be too affectionate.

The only times you can see him wearing his emotions on his face are when Kang opens up about something and you can see Sailom forget himself and just sort of LOOK at him, all open and emotional, and then it disappears right after.

gif from this post by @moonjisung because it's too early to find it in the tag lol

Meanwhile Kang doesn't overthink anything like that. So he can be overly affectionate and gaze at Sailom lovingly and not even question it. Because he likes Pimfah!! he's just being goofy with a new guy friend!! it's normal!! he doesn't like Sailom, that would be ridiculous, it's totally normal to be lost in your platonic bro's eyes!! he's obtuse, blind to his own feelings, and that's kind of to his own advantage because he'll continue to flirt without worrying about it. He'll continue to get distracted by Sailom because he hasn't worked out WHY Sailom is so distracting yet.

But Sailom knows exactly how he feels and that's exactly WHY he's always pulling back and not lingering in those moments as much as Kang. It's not that he doesn't have the ability to flirt or the chemistry either - if you think back to the first couple of episodes, Sailom has this flirtatious confidence when he hates Kang that just oozes out of him in every confrontational scene they have.

but he can't have that confidence with something he *actually wants.*

[telomeke]

POLL TAG – FIVE FAVORITE CHARACTERS

I was tagged by @lurkingshan (at this post linked here) and @pickletrip (at this post linked here). Thanks dearies! 🥰

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Challenge: make a poll with five of your all time favorite characters, and then tag five people to do the same. See which character is everyone's favorite.

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I'm sticking to BLs as well, because the field would be far too wide otherwise (can you imagine a poll with Dolly Levi, Buffy Summers, Joe Rossi from Lou Grant, Lady Deathstrike from X-Men 2, any one of the Golden Girls, Erik Killmonger from Black Panther the movie, the Beastmaster and cartoon Aladdin? 🤣).

Anyway, I don't watch all that much BL (not compared to the majority of people here on BL Tumblr, who have watchlists longer than Babe's wig when he was Wansarat in The Sign). So that narrows the field considerably for me – and my list has some likely suspects, including an unbreakable pairing, and also one highly unusual choice. But I'll explain my choices after the poll itself:

Why these characters? Here's my spiel:

PatPran (Bad Buddy)  I've combined these two as a single choice, because obviously they go together (and so well too). But really, I would have loved to have listed them separately, because I have different reasons for loving them. Pat is just an all-round good guy, hopelessly optimistic, generous and so giving; he thinks of others before himself (and if both partners in a couple do that, well, you then have a mutually-reinforcing relationship). Pran I love because I can see so much of myself in him, from his tics and foibles, his interests, to his struggles finding his courage and growing into his own identity.

Li Ming (Moonlight Chicken)  In a lot of ways, what Li Ming was going through in MLC paralleled some of my own experiences when I was a teen his age. If only they'd had MLC or something similar for teenage me to have watched growing up! Li Ming was somehow able to navigate the pressures of becoming someone true to himself (something that Pran, and I too in my teens, struggled with) while dealing with real world issues at the same time (economic hardship in Li Ming's case, while in mine it was general teen angst and family stress). He didn't let life get to him, and he stayed the course, knowing his own self-worth even when others were telling him to scale back his expectations (Uncle Jim and Heart's parents). Lessons in there for all LGBTQ+ teens, and Khun Noppharnach's socially-conscious BLs should be given more credit for the positive role models they portray and how they help the younger set. Plus Fourth did an excellent job bringing Li Ming to life (thanks in part I think to Director Aof's guidance; Fourth's Atom in My Love Mix-Up Thailand is a lot less grounded and authentic, at least from what I've seen in the first couple of episodes).

Porsche (KinnPorsche)  This entry is just for fun. KinnPorsche was a wild ride, whacking us with whiplash at every turn, and Porsche was emblematic of that experience. Cool, sexy martial arts fighter in one episode, total buffoon at the mercy of sprinklers, piss-allergic carp and mermaid costumes in others. Apo gamely played along, and he can do both slick action and slapstick comedy well, so watching Porsche always brought a smile to my face. Whether it was seducing Kinn with pappy supermarket bread, or warding off ghosts with a penis amulet, you never knew what craziness was in store next with this character. Pure entertainment.

Adachi (Cherry Magic)  Adachi charmed the briefs off me the moment the lift doors went CLANG!!! on him while he was distracted with whatever it was that was speedrunning through his head again. Such a lovable doofus, always surprised by whatever situation he managed to stumble into. Eiji Akaso is really good-looking, but he didn't care about image and happily took all the pratfalls in his stride. He somehow managed to imbue Adachi's clumsy clownery with a strange sense of dignity (helped along, I suppose, by the fact that we could also hear Adachi's inner monologue, allowing us to see the innocent good-heartedness within).

Dissaya (Bad Buddy)  This is the odd one out. Pran's mom was hated by so many fans during Bad Buddy's run, who blamed her for ruining Pran's life in many ways. And it's true her own hang-ups wrought havoc on Pran's relationship with the world outside. But for someone with so few scenes, I think she's actually one of the more complex characters in Bad Buddy, with a turbulent backstory that explains how her own relationship with the world got so warped. My read is that everything she did, including sending Pran away in high school, was done out of love for her beloved only son and motivated by a desire to protect him at all costs. She was a smothering, over-protective mother to be sure, but I think the lady just didn't know any better, and the last two episodes of Bad Buddy really do invite us to rethink our earlier appraisals of her. It wasn't easy doing Dissaya's character study based on the fairly scant details we got (write-ups linked here and here), but they were enough for me to glean an understanding of who I think she is. And I think in the end she is someone worthy of respect, so I do tip my hat out of respect for her. It's also obvious Pran loves her dearly, as much as she loves him back. And I think I trust Pran's judgement of character on this one. 😍

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Onward tagging:

@neuroticbookworm, @colourme-feral, @airenyah, @wen-kexing-apologist, @solitaryandwandering

I really want to tag more, but this game limits us to five so these are just five people tagged at random. If I haven't tagged you but you'd like to play, please do so (knowing that I want to tag everyone and then some)! And please tag me if you play, so that I can read and vote on your poll too. 😍

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[bl-bracket]

Most Whipped Round 4: Pat (Bad Buddy) vs Joke (Jack & Joker)

[Submitted Reasons Under Cut]

Pat: Pran fell first, and Pat fell harder. He tries so hard to get thorugh Pran. He was ready to be a secret (though he hates it) even after they were found out. Just for Pran to recover his friends (that Pat don’t even like and find stupid). He announces his love to the entire school (and would do it again) If he's sad, just seeing Pran makes him better. He cannot stop smelling Pran (even before dating). His a puppy after Pat and will do everything he needs in a heartbeat (except being on time xD) He desires so, so much for Pran to be happy!

Joke: the way joke looks at jack!! his eyes say it all. and the way he melts when jack just touches his face/neck.. he is WHIPPED!

Ok listen. Joke met Jack and they had ONE flirty conversation in a bar and that was enough for him to fall in love with the dude. After a series of well meaning but ultimately stupid choices, Joke ended up turning himself in to the police so Jack wouldnt take the blame for the bank robbery he commited. Let's keep in mind that this was after only knowing Jack for very little. He then spent 5 years in prison thinking of all the ways he could apologize to Jack and even wrote a list, and he also got tattoos dedicated to Jack. When he got out of prison, the first thing he did was look for Jack and did The Most to get him to forgive him. When Jack finally forgave him, he did everything he could to help Jack achieve his dream of opening a school for underprivileged kids. When Jack's grandma got sick, he swallowed his pride and asked his dad (a doctor, who was been nothing but an asshole to Joke his whole life and has basically traumatized him into feeling worthless and undeserving of love) to help Jack's grandma. He has both explicitly said and proved that the would do ANYTHING, even risk his own life, just so Jack could be free of the mafia boss that he works for and be able to live the life he wants. The way he looks at Jack with so much love and longing!! That man is so DEVOTED to Jack it's honestly insane. If this isnt being whipped idk what is