#posts that are blazed in my heart

[waterme-stories]

She is

17!

so I am paying $10 to make you look at her :3

[fox-mulder-gets-pegged]

I just wanna say bc I KNOW you're somewhere on tumblr, to the teenage girl who attended Take Your Kid To Work Day at an office building in Ontario, Canada circa 2013 and had a conversation with a middle aged woman in which you showed her your Black Veil Brides fanart and fanfics and ship content and told her about different fanfic tropes including a/b/o verse bc she happened to know who Panic! at The Disco and Fallout Boy were and thus you felt the need to show her your bandblr ship art, that was my fucking mother and I had to clarify all that to her including looking my mother in the eye and trying to explain a/b/o verse without sounding like a lunatic.

It's been 10 years and I still regularly sent evil energies in your direction. Since you'd be probably two years younger than me and thus legally an adult now, please know if this post reaches you it's on sight.

[moomeecore]

native plants in my yard! some were planted by me, some are "volunteers"!

[tojiscrack]

is it weird that i wish y/n existed in the actual jjk verse. like her personality fits so well with almost every single character, and the chemistry between megumi and y/n is THE BEST ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡

her personality is so real and unlike any other reader i’ve come across in other reader x [insert character] fics. the chemistry between her and other characters doesn’t feel forced, if you understand what i mean? i thoroughly enjoy reading EVERY scene because of that! (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶)

you said to look out for foreshadowing which is what i have been trying to do but perhaps i’m being a little silly looking way too early, considering other chapters have not been released yet. but one thing i have noticed is that megumi only really has shown CLEAR signs of liking her more than just a friend when he is about to leave her (not the scene where he’s silently fighting over sitting next to her at yuji’s place because that could arguably be seen as platonic too despite me seeing it as him liking her) - for example; when he’s going on vacation without her. now i understand that this is only one example but i have a feeling that this may become a reoccurring theme - what was it, absence makes the heart grow fonder? i have a feeling he’ll only ever understand his feelings for her when he is away from her. and given the angst hashtag, it wouldn’t exactly be surprising if for any reason they moved away from each other, whether figuratively or physically.

i could be completely wrong though and if that’s the case, then this is embarrassing ( ᵒ̴̶̷᷄◡̶͂ᵒ̴̶̷᷅ )و

but regardless, i’m so happy i stumbled across this fic. seriously, the way u write is awesome and i can only wish to be as good as you when it comes to writing! the dialogue, the chemistry between the characters is so cute and feels like a coming of age sitcom. i love it i love it i love it and i love you!! (๑˃́ꇴ˂̀๑)

please keep up the good work, soldier. i salut you for your hard work keeping us all sane after gege shattered our souls (stay alive, don’t let him find you) ദ്ദി(˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧

liar, liar masterlist here

oh. my. GOSH. a long message? AJSJWKSJWJSJ STOPPP I’M SO EXCITED TO ANSWER THIS

it is not weird at ALL. i created this y/n with the sole thought that there should be a character as wild as her (i love goofy characters sm you have no idea). like my fav character from aot? connie. fav from jjk? gojo. fav from haikyuu? tanaka and hinata. fav from death note? L (don’t lie, that man was funny af).

read that entire sentence about her chemistry with megumi and the relationship she has with the other characters not being forced with a FAT smile on my face 🙂‍↕️ an author knows they’ve won once someone points this out using their own free will. thank you for that 😭💞

the second i saw the word ‘foreshadowing’ in ur message, JAISJWISJWJSJ. YES, YOU HAVE A PREDICTION? TELL ME MORE (i feel like a mastermind rn muahahahaha) 😋 you are nawt silly for looking for it earlier. i’ve dropped so many hints and no one’s picked it apart yet (surprisingly). some are more obvious than others, but let me tell you now, once you’ve noticed it, you’re gonna smack ur forehead and think ‘why didn’t i see this before?’.

i LOVE how you’re playing devil’s advocate for yourself (you’re so smart omg). like you’ve mentioned how the only in-your-face type of thing we’ve seen so far is the airport scene (i mean, if gojo pointing it out wasn’t so obvious, dk what is, really, lolol). and i also like how you’ve made it so that the arguing in yuji’s room can be easily seen as platonic despite what you might think (we need smart people like you so pls don’t die tyvm).

and OOH, IDK WHAT TO TELL YOU WITHOUT SPOILING IT. distance makes the heart grow fonder… yeah, can’t reveal whether this trope is for them or not. i can, however, confuse you a little and say that you’re half right. maybe, like, forty five percent right if i have to slap a number on it. yeah. but there is something that occurs later on (you guessed it, with the angst hashtag) that makes me want to say that you’re actually fifty five percent right. idk, you’ll see what i mean once the main story’s out 😭

this would NOT be embarrassing for you if you’re wrong, let me tell you that much. this fic’s been out since the end of december (beginning of january?) and no one’s come to a prediction as well thought out as yours. for that, i will NOT forget you when i write out the half-correct prediction of yours in the coming chapters.

i’m so happy you stumbled across my fic too! 😭 i’m having sm fun writing this out and laughing to myself (not at you babe, just as the evil mastermind that i am). i’ll be responsible for your complaints once the angst chapters get out (plural because there’s a LOT of them planned). tysm for ur kind message, i’m so flattered my writing pleases you 😭 dialogue is hard to write, trying to match it with the characters ofc, so i appreciate your support on that 💘

girl, gege will never find me. after what he did to my satoru, i will find him. don’t get it twisted.

on the contrary, i’m so upset you wrote all of this anonymously but i respect it, there might be a gazillion reasons why you’d like to remain anonymous. so if you ever send a message again, just lmk it’s you. call yourself the ‘big brain anon’ (😤) because you’re so smart and ily and don’t be humble about it, you are SO smart <3

[faunabel]

i've been dying to share what i've been up to in minecraft btw. long post warning!! spoilers for minecraft i guess

so i found a bunch of black stuff in a cave, and when i looked it up, everyone just said to RUN 😭 terrifying

there was also an ancient city which i decided to go to eventually but when The Warden came out i panicked and left. luckily a big waterfall spawned right next to the ancient city so i just swam up it and left. i should go back soon tho... i was pissed off actually bc even tho i placed wool everywhere, merely jumping set the alarms off!! why!! all i did was jump on a block of wool!!!

i also built a cool house :3 i might add stairs to the roof. undecided.

i did a good job on the roof tho! i think playing the sims has paid off.

a cool attic for storage (i need more cobwebs though)

with my fun enchantment setup (don't ask me how many cows i murdered for it... i still feel bad)

i also made a bedroom! that has a basement with furnaces and more storage

made a dock in my backyard

made a dance hall for my allays but they all got lost in a cave. which is ok with me because they got kind of annoying after a while.

made a neat bridge with another dock! the dock is only there bc i miscounted by one when placing the pillars and didnt wanna redo them all.

also built a coop for my chickens :D

and the lead on the wandering trader's llamas broke so they're mine now. i bred them but the baby despawned fr some reason :( the donkey baby i bred also despawned :(

also found this super cool bow from fishing! i just wanted infinity because i was having trouble getting flint but i got so much more. (enchanted it from iv to v myself tho)

[midnitetears]

Aching Heart #120

In the depths of my soul, a storm does rage,

A tempest of pain, as I turn the page,

Of a love once cherished, now torn apart,

Leaving wounds in my fragile heart.

You stand before me, a stranger's face,

As I reach out for comfort and grace,

But you look through me, with vacant eyes,

Ignoring my cries, my tear-filled sighs.

Do you not see the hurt I bear?

The weight of sorrow, the burden I wear,

Yearning for love, for reassurance sweet,

As I stumble, broken, at your feet.

I long for your touch, your gentle embrace,

To feel your love, your warm embrace,

But you remain cold, distant, aloof,

Leaving me stranded, lost in this rueful proof.

Oh, how I ache for the love we once shared,

For the bond we forged, the moments we bared,

But now I stand alone, in the shadow of your gaze,

A stranger to you, lost in this maze.

Yet still I hope, that you'll see me true,

And offer the comfort I seek from you,

For in my darkest hour, I need your light,

To guide me through this endless night.

Yours Faithfully🌻

[acourtofquestions]

"I didn't break," she said quietly. His heart cracked at the words. "I didn't tell them anything."

She didn't say it for praise, to boast. But rather to tell him, her consort, of where they stood in this war. What their enemies might know.

"I knew you wouldn't," he managed to say.

"She ... she tried to convince me that this was the bad dream. When Cairn was done with me, or during it, I don't know, she'd try to worm her way into my mind." She glanced around the cave, as if she could see the world beyond it. "She spun fantasies that felt so real..." She bobbed under the surface. Perhaps she'd needed the cooling water of the lake to be able to hear her own voice again; perhaps she needed the distance between them so she could speak these words. She emerged, slicking back her hair with a hand. "They felt like this."

Half of him didn't want to know, but he asked, "What sort of illusions?"

A long pause. "It doesn't matter now."

Too soon to push—if ever.

Then she asked softly, "How long?"

It took the entirety of his three centuries of training to keep the devastation, the agony for her, from his face. "Two months, three days, and seven hours."

Her mouth tightened, either at the length of time, or the fact that he'd counted every single one of those hours apart.

She ran her fingers through her hair, its strands floating around her in the water. Still too long for two months to have passed. "They healed me after each ... session. So that I stopped knowing what had been done and what was in my mind and where the truth lay." Erase her scars, and Maeve stood a better chance at convincing her none of this was real. "But the healers couldn't remember how long my hair was, or Maeve wanted to confuse me further, so they grew it out." Her eyes darkened at the memory of why, perhaps, they had needed to regrow her hair in the first place.

"Do you want me to cut it back to the length it was when I last saw you?" His words were near-guttural.

"No." Ripples shivered around her. "I want it so I can remember."

What had been done to her, what she'd survived and what she had protected.

Even if the woman treading water before him didn't seem to have vengeance on her mind. Not so much as a hint of the burning rage that fueled her.

He didn't blame her. Knew it would take time, time and distance, to heal the internal wounds. If they could ever really heal at all.

But he'd work with her, help in whatever way he could. And if she never returned to who she had been before this, he would not love her any less.

Aelin dunked her head, and when she emerged, she said, "Maeve was about to put a Valg collar around my neck. She left to retrieve it." The scent of her lingering fear drifted toward him, and Rowan lurched a step closer to the water's edge. "It's why I—why I got away. She had me moved to the army camp for safekeeping, and I ..." Her voice stalled, yet she met his stare. Let him read the words she could not say, in that silent way they'd always been able to communicate. Escape wasn't my intention.

"No, Fireheart," he breathed, shaking his head, horror creeping over him. "There ... there was no collar."

She blinked, head angling. "That was a dream, too?"

His heart cracked as he struggled for the words. Made himself voice them. "No—it was real. Or Maeve thought it was. But the collars, the Valg presence ... It was a lie that we crafted. To draw Maeve out, hopefully away from you and Doranelle."

Only the faint lapping of water sounded. "There was no collar?"

Rowan lowered himself to his knees and shook his head. "I—Aelin, if I'd known what she'd do with the knowledge, what you'd decide to do-"

He might have lost her. Not from Maeve or the gods or the Lock, but from his own damned choices. The lie he'd spun.

Aelin drifted beneath the surface again. So deep that when the flare happened, it was little more than a flutter. The light burst from her, rippling across the lake, illumining the stones, the slick ceiling above. A silent eruption. His breathing turned ragged. But she swam toward the surface again, light streaming off her body like tendrils of clouds. It had nearly vanished when she emerged.

"I'm sorry," he managed to say. Again, that angle of the head. "You have nothing to be sorry for." He did, though. He'd added to her terror, her desperation. He'd— "If you had not planted that lie for Maeve, if she had not told me, I don't think we'd be here right now," she said.

He tried to rein in the twisting in his gut, the urge to reach for her, to beg for her forgiveness. Tried and tried.

She only asked, "What of the others?" She didn't know-couldn't know how and why and where they'd all parted ways. So Rowan told her, as succinctly and calmly as he could.

When he finished, Aelin was quiet for long minutes.

She stared out into the blackness, the rippling of her treading water the only sound. Her body had nearly lost that freshly forged glow.

Then she pivoted back toward him. "Maeve said you and the others were in the North. That you'd been spotted by her spies there. Did you plant that deception for her, too?"

He shook his head. "Lysandra has been thorough, it seems."

Aelin's throat bobbed. "I believed her." It sounded like a confession, somehow.

So Rowan found himself saying, "I told you once that even if death separated us, I would rip apart every world until I found you." He gave her a slash of a smile. "Did you really believe this would stop me?'

She pursed her mouth, and at last, those agonizing emotions began to surface in her eyes. "You were supposed to save Terrasen."

"Considering that the sun shines, I'd say Erawan hasn't won yet. So we'll save it together."

He didn't let himself think of the final cost of destroying Erawan. And Aelin seemed in no hurry to discuss it, either, as she said, "You should have gone to Terrasen. It needs you."

"I need you more." He didn't balk from the stark honesty roughening his voice. "And Terrasen will need you, too. Not Lysandra masquerading as you, but you."

A shallow nod. "Maeve raised her army. I doubt it was only to guard me while she was away."

He'd put the thought aside, to consider later. "It might just be to shore up her defenses, should Erawan win across the sea."

"Do you truly think that's what she plans to do with it?"

"No," he admitted. "I don't."

And if Maeve meant to bring that army to Terrasen, to either unite with Erawan or simply be another force battering their kingdom, to strike when they were weakest, they had to hurry. Had to get back. Immediately. His mate's eyes shone with the same understanding and dread.

Aelin's throat bobbed as she whispered, "I'm so tired, Rowan."

His heart strained again. "I know, Fireheart."

He opened his mouth to say more, to coax her onto land so he might at least hold her if words couldn't ease her burden, but that's when he saw it.

A boat, ancient and every inch of it carved, drifted out of the gloom.

"Get back to shore." The boat wasn't drifting—it was being tugged. He could just barely make out two dark forms slithering beneath the surface.

Aelin didn't hesitate, yet her strokes remained steady as she swam for him. She didn’t balk at the hand he extended, and he wrapped his cloak around her while the boat ambled past.

But Aelin turned toward them, hair dripping onto the stone at her bare feet. Half a thought from her could have had her dry, yet she made no move to do so. "We're being hunted."

"We know that," Lorcan shot back, and were it not for the fact that Aelin was currently allowing him to rest a hand upon her shoulder, Rowan would have thrown the male into the lake.

But Aelin's features didn't shift from that graveness, that unruffled calm. "The only way to the sea is through these caves." It was an outrageous claim.

"And I suppose they told you that?" Lorcan's face was hard as granite.

"Watch it," Rowan snarled. Fenrys indeed bared his teeth at the dark-haired warrior, fur bristling. But Aelin said simply, "Yes." Her chin didn't dip an inch. "The land above is crawling with soldiers and spies. Going beneath them is the only way."

Elide stepped forward. "I will go." She cut a cold glance toward Lorcan. "You can take your chances above, if you're so disbelieving." Lorcan's jaw tightened, and a small part of Rowan relished seeing the delicate Lady of Perranth fillet the centuries-hardened warrior with a few words. "Considering the potential pitfalls of the situation is wise."

"We don't have time to consider," Rowan cut in before Elide could voice the retort on her tongue. "We need to keep moving. Gavriel stalked forward to study the moored boat and what seemed to be bundles of supplies on its sturdy planks. "How will we navigate our way, though?"

"We'll be escorted," Aelin answered.

"And if they abandon us?" Lorcan challenged. Aelin leveled unfazed eyes upon him.

"Then you'll have to find a way out, I suppose." A hint-just a spark-of temper belied those calm words. There was nothing else to debate after that.

And they had little to pack. The others gave Aelin privacy to dress by the fire while they inspected the boat, and when his mate emerged again, clad in boots, pants, and various layers beneath her gray surcoat, the sight of her in clothes from Mistward was enough to make his gut clench.

No longer a naked, escaped captive. Yet none of that wickedness, that joy and unchecked wildness illuminated her face.

The rest of their party waited on the boat, seated on the benches built into its high-lipped sides. Fenrys and Elide both sat as seemingly far from Lorcan as they could get, Gavriel a golden, long-suffering buffer between them.

Rowan lingered at the shore's edge, a hand extended for Aelin while she approached. Each of her steps seemed considered—as if she still marveled at being able to move freely. As if still adjusting to her legs without the burden of chains.

"Why?" Lorcan mused aloud, more to himself. "Why go to these lengths for us?"

He got his answer—they all did—a heartbeat later. Aelin halted a few feet away from the boat and Rowan's outstretched hand. She turned back toward the cave itself. The Little Folk peeked from those birch branches, from the rocks, from behind stalagmites. Slowly, deeply, Aelin bowed to them. Rowan could have sworn all those tiny heads lowered in answer.

A pair of bony grayish hands rose above a nearby rock, something glittering held between them, and set the object on the stone.

Rowan went still. A crown of silver and pearl and diamond gleamed there, fashioned into upswept swan's wings

"The Crown of Mab," Gavriel breathed. But Fenrys looked away, toward the looming dark, his tail curling around him.

Aelin staggered a step closer to the crown. "It—it fell into the river."

Rowan didn't want to know how she'd encountered it, why she'd seen it fall into a river. Maeve had kept her sisters' two crowns under constant guard, only bringing them out to be displayed in her throne room on state occasions. In memory of her siblings, she'd intoned. Rowan had sometimes wondered if it was a reminder that she had outlasted them, had kept the throne for herself in the end.

The grayish hand slipped over the rock's edge again and nudged the crown in silent gesture. Take it.

"You want to know why?" Gavriel softly asked Lorcan as Aelin strode for the rock. Nothing but solemn reverence on her face. "Because she is not only Brannon's Heir, but Mab's, too."

A throwback to her great-great-grandmother, Maeve had taunted her. Who had inherited her strength, her immortal lifespan.

Aelin's fingers closed around the crown, lifting it gently. It sparkled like living moonlight between her hands.

My sister Mab's line ran true, Elide claimed Maeve had said on the beach. In every way, it seemed.

But Aelin made no move to don the crown while she approached him once more, her gait steadier this time. Trying not to dwell on the unbearable smoothness of her hand as it wrapped around his, Rowan helped her aboard, then climbed in himself before freeing the ropes tethering them to the shore.

Gavriel went on, awe in every word, "And that makes her their queen, too."

Aelin met Gavriel's gaze, the crown near-glowing in her hands. "Yes," was all she said as the boat sailed into the darkness.

[xerith-42]

Time to set my expectations unreasonably high right before the announcement:

If there's no Blaze content in the announcement itself or the content it promises, my disappointment will be immesurable, and my day will be ruined

[tellmeomuse]

Patreon Changes

Hi! Now that I'm almost a month into this experiment, I've decided to make a few changes to my Patreon tiers.

(This shouldn't be a negative change for any of my current patrons, don't worry!)

When I first started all this, I was sort of thinking to myself "oh, the lowest tier is sort of a tip tier, I shouldn't put too many benefits in there" and "wow, $5 is so much to ask, just the historical blogs aren't worth that, I should put writer commentary in that tier!"

But as I continue, I realize that there's a lot of writer commentary (specifically things about how I designed the way the characters and settings look) that I wanted all of my readers to be able to access. So I put those on the free tier.

I've also come to realize that $5 a month for like 5-10 short historical articles isn't that much to ask. It's probably going to be 5k-15k words of additional content each month, plus illustrative photos. While hip-deep in some really dense books about the origins of Daidalos, I realized that I may be underselling my own time and research here. Even if most of this information can be found in a few books, the time it takes to read those books and summarize the information isn't worthless.

So I've decided to make my writer commentary more accessible and let the historical blogs stand on their own.

Going forward, all writer commentary will be available to my Wanderers ($2 tier) and not just my Explorers ($5 tier). The free tier and tiers above $5 will be unchanged.

I'm going to be posting some more writer commentary tonight, as well as a post about Daidalos (talk about a freaking labyrinth full of yarn to untangle), and I'm going to go back to my older writer commentary and make that available to Explorers.

So to be clear now:

Free tier: basic commentary on character designs, announcements Wanderer ($2): early chapters, writer commentary Explorer ($5): historical blog posts Adventurer ($7): additional supplemental scenes Hero ($10): free ebook access once it is released

Plus, obviously, everything that previous tiers have access to.

Also, an announcement for Adventurers: now that both of the main characters have been introduced, supplemental scenes will start soon. There are four stories total and they'll be popping up roughly once a month.

Finally, one more announcement! I got a couple people asking if the book would be made available in hard copy. I was initially hesitant, but I've found some services online that should make that doable. Once the story is complete, I'll put out some interest surveys to figure out which option would be best.

Anyway, thank you to everyone who's supported me thus far, whether by reading, commenting, reblogging, or becoming a Patron. I appreciate all of you very much. 💜

[waterme-stories]

It is her

Birthday!

(she is 17!)

[mydollsaregay]

why must all of maryellen’s cutest outfits be retired and expensive secondhand??? 😭😭😭

let’s go over the state of things:

maryellen’s vacation playsuit. a totally adorable summer outfit, leaning into the 50’s trend of a playsuit - a romper with a matching detachable skirt. so darling! naturally, it was retired after only one year, and the cheapest it’s currently being sold for on mercari is ninety dollars (missing the shoes, so it’s not even complete). okay, that’s sad, but every collection has one or two poor gems like this.

maryellen’s strawberry outfit! I love this one - I think the colors are just the right combination of cute and garish, which gives it a really fun retro vibe. This one was out for three years so I’m sure the secondhand prices are more reasonable - oh wait, no. they tend to be listed for around a hundred dollars. 😞

maryellen’s rockin’ roller skating outfit is a *little* better. but the dress on its own is still being listed for about fifty five dollars so it feels weird to celebrate that as an improvement. it was out for two years, so I get it being a *bit* more pricey. but the full outfit is being listed for about a hundred dollars so like. still way too much for me.

maryellen’s flamingo swim set is super cute, but it’s only a swim suit. surely people can’t be asking that much for - oh. the swimsuit alone tends to be listed for about 70 and the whole set I seems to be listed for mostly around 150 at the low end. bro.

maryellen’s play outfit. look, at this point I’m getting a bit desperate. I don’t even really like this one all that much (I think it’s cute but it looks weirdly cheap to me?). but this was out for three years, and looks like the kind of outfit that would have good sales! surely I can find it at a decently low price. oh - no, it looks like that will be $70 without the shoes. okay then.

honestly, i get the prices a bit. clearly people are buying them occasionally at those prices, as the sold listings were in those ballparks. however, I AM annoyed at ag. they rotated her collection so quickly that they burned through a bunch of cute designs super fast.

i wish ag would bring back some of these! I feel like her playsuit especially got the short end of the stick. it’s such a cute design and a really cool bit of fashion history.

[artvann]

human-ish form zarathos ! !

i hope the scars look alright

[crazywolf828]

Oh you know I immediately turned that new blaze feature off on here

[blazingstarship]

….

[ren-from-mars]

Oh my god I have a little fuck like that !

[malikselfindulgence]

90% of why I like infinite is because of his theme song . Other 10% is because he's lame as fuck