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ramblingdisaster73 · 2 years ago

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hi! i'm curious - what are your thoughts on some ppl (maybe mostly in the minority?) have made comparisons of the carlos & iris rescue scene in 4x03 being parallel to that of tk/carlos in the iconic Push, and how they've said it kind of undermines the emotional weight in Push?

personally, i'm trying not to put too much weight on it, bc i think it's probably not as deep as they're making it out to be, and it makes logical sense for carlos to tell her to breathe as she was near hyperventilating at the time (if my memory serves me well, i'm not planning to rewatch it so pls do correct me if im wrong) – but the more cynical part of me can see where they're coming from as well (e.g. with the framing), and it's starting to get to me a little

my heart really does hurt for tk in that moment tho :( it certainly didn't help that carlos was being a jerk during that scene - this will def always be a skip for me. there's angst and then there's being a jerk for no reason bc he's what, mad? i can't imagine what/how tk must be feeling at the time

also, idk. there's not much to work with here, a part of me wondered (if it was intentional) if carlos was that spiteful enough to purposely do all of that to get a reaction out of tk (i doubt this. it's fucked up, but it's whatever, he's already walking a tightrope between being petty and also being an a*hole. i honestly wouldn't be surprised if the writers are trying to play this up for dramatic purposes), or if they'd just wanted to be sprinkle in the additional ✨ angst ✨ to get a reaction out of the audience instead, if it was completely unintentional, or it really isn't as deep as that.

ig we'll never know atp, but i thought i could come to u and see what you think! i'm really liking the discussions we've all had in between the eps haha, i hope that's okay!

This got a bit longer than I intended.

The “Breathe, breathe” scene in Push was a huge moment for them (& us) after their breakup – but I don’t really think the writers intended to have Carlos tell Iris the same thing to cheapen the scene in Push.

I totally get the people who had that gut reaction of “what the fuck, why would they have him say that like that?” and feel like it took away from the Tarlos scene – I do. The first time I watched the ep (I have had it on repeat pretty much anytime I am home alone while I am writing.),

I had a similar thought process – when I watched it again the 2nd time though, it made more sense to me narratively & like you said she was hyperventilating & in a decent amount of distress – telling her to breathe was pretty much the only thing he could say here. Saying something like “calm down” doesn’t always help when you are not in a position to think clearly – simple direction is much easier to follow (I say this as someone who has frequent panic attacks & telling me to calm down is not at all helpful) so, if someone was telling me to breathe – I would be able to follow that direction – telling me to calm down would only make me panic more – because I have to think about HOW to calm down.

I really do think that they are making Carlos’ less than perfect sides more obvious this season, that is why what we saw last year as a little bit of pettiness (3x13) now feels almost cruel at times. I understand why there are fans that just can’t get into this storyline – why they are struggling so much.

I have said since at least last season, the writers did a real disservice to Carlos by making his appear so perfect on the surface for so long. By finding ways to put the blame for any issues between them on TK, or just glossing over his need to keep everything in boxes & his control issues – made it so some fans didn’t need to look deeper at the character – they saw this absolutely gorgeous man, saw the ways he supported TK – thought he was the perfect boyfriend/fiancé, the cop with a good heart.

Now, all of a sudden, they are being confronted with the fact that Carlos has a past, one that some just can’t fathom. They are being forced to acknowledge that Officer Reyes is not perfect and they really don’t know how to handle it.

If we had any in canon hints (other than deleted scenes we won’t ever see) of the actual closeness of Iris & Carlos – some of the people that are struggling with this arc – may have been able to believe that this person was so important to Carlos (NOT MORE IMPORTANT THAN TK, BUT STILL IMPORTANT), but – we didn’t. So now, they have to build that now – and Rafa & Lyndsy are doing a fantastic job of showing a real emotional (platonic) relationship.

The writers had to do something that would SHOW us their closeness – not just tell us, like some of the other parts of the storyline – and this was actually (imo) a beautiful way to do it. I don’t really think it was to be petty or dickish to TK, just to show us the emotional connection the characters share. The fact that Rafa & Lyndsy have pretty great chemistry helps this as well.

Carlos was definitely walking the very fine line between petty & dickish, but I think the writers need him to do that for this part – the 3rd act. In a lot of media – the 3rd act is the hard part – either emotionally or mentally – they needed to set up the angst and tension for when Carlos got shoveled to kick off the 4th act.

Would we lose our shit if Carlos went missing while things were perfect for Carlos & TK? absolutely – we love them. BUT – to have it happen when things aren’t as stable, when they are both too much in their feelings/heads to see clearly – that is where the real pay off comes from.

We know that Carlos & TK love each other deeply, we understand why TK went to talk to Iris, we know that it didn’t trigger anything for her. Carlos – doesn’t right now. He is a man that thinks rationally (because he tosses his problems in a box & throws away the key) – but right now rational thought isn’t something he is capable of.

The man had like 15 seconds of not being noticeably stressed the fuck out on screen before that “dream” venue called him – he has been riding on pure emotion and avoidance ever since.

It is easier to lash out (or treat not so great) the people that you KNOW love you. You know that they will be there when you realize what you did/said. We all do it in little ways all the time, (we have a bad day at work, then go home – and every little thing builds up until you blow up – typically not at the people/thing that originally caused your irritation). In this case – I think that Carlos blames himself for all of it – and he can’t shove it in a box – he has to face it, especially in this 4th act.

Carlos KNOWS that TK loves him. But this man is TERRIFIED of his actions hurting Iris, that he seems as though he is ignoring TK, or at least dismissing him. I go back and forth between thinking that Carlos was more defensive to TK in the bunkroom than trying to explain it – but that is an emotional response from me. When I take my emotions out – I can see the way his anxiety is tearing him apart, he is scared to hurting TK, of TK leaving – not because of something TK did – but because Carlos hurt him emotionally. He is scared of jeopardizing Iris’ health and wellbeing.

He also can’t see that these two people, the ones he loves most (in very different ways), are stronger than he can see – especially in this particular situation.

*We have NEVER seen Carlos be the one to fall apart. He is used to being the one putting the pieces back together, for the most part – keeping a clearer head, & connecting the dots. Right now – he isn’t able to do that – but he also won’t let TK or Iris really help him – which leads to the shoveling.

I know that Tim and Ronen keep hyping up Rafa’s acting in 4x04 – but I am also really looking forward to Ronen’s as well. Both of these men have been doing such an amazing job of making us feel all these annoying feelings.

I think another reason people are struggling to see Carlos being more standoffish to TK in 4x03 is that we have watched TK handle this situation so well. Carlos tells him that he has been legally married to someone during their whole relationship, TK listens to him, listens to his reasons on why. We have watched TK handle it with grace – but are now being shown Carlos not doing the same. And it does hurt. It hurts because we know how much they love each other, how much they truly need and want each other. So, to see real friction between them (probably the most we have seen – especially since they broke up off screen) hurts. Going into those scenes knowing that the shoveling was coming hurt more.

The hurt is intentional from the storytelling perspective– but I am hoping & optimistic about a pretty good pay off. I have a feeling that a lot of this elevated pettiness will be gone like the ‘lasting ramifications of hypothermia for TK’ last season, so I am not worried about that continuing either. Once he is rescued, we will get the super tactile, loving, beautiful Tarlos – one that has become stronger through their ordeals – both separate & together.

When in doubt: Just remember Tarlos is endgame & all roads lead to the wedding.

I love the discussions that this show brings up & my husband loves that I have people other than him to talk to about this show.

#anon #911 lone star season 4 #911 lone star spoilers #911 lone star speculation #tarlos #carlos reyes #tk strand

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maxlarens · 6 months ago

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Hi againnnn

I asked earlier how you found lando easy to write

Girl I cannot begin to express how much your insight is saving me rn I’m super new to f1 and I haven’t rlly been too active in trying to watch races live so your reactions afterward help me understand stuff better💕💕

I legit woke up in time to follow the updates on twitter for the last ten laps 😳 it was so crazy watching the ranks and just going through like ten thousand emotions waiting for lando to give up the spot I was so worried he’d be an ass and not give it up but then immediately was so excited for Oscar and yet so sad idk😔😔

I’ve yet to watch any post race interviews and stuff so if you can recommend certain things that’d be great

Also just had to let you know that I love the gifs you reblog😩😩 Oscar is so real when he says the trophy is pretty cuz if I was an f1 driver Hungary would be top goal just to get those trophies and his reaction is so real you can just see it on his face even tho he’s not saying much I think you might be slowly converting me into an Oscar phase🙈

Can I be 🤩anon pls (rlly hoping thats not taken😭)

hiiiiii!!!! of course u can be 🤩 anon!!! the emojis i have taken so far are 🍓 🏏 and 🧃 !

anyway TBH i only got into f1 at the beginning of the year, and only properly after the japan race i believe. so it’s all coming out my ass a bit😭 i pick the right language up fairly quickly so i feel like my knowledge sounds more impressive than it actually is. but thank u anyway!!! i read opinions on here and f1 articles so it’s coming from somewhere legitimate at least.

and re: post race interviews i generally wait for them to pop up on the dash organically or even instagram. they make me stressed out so i don’t seek them out. as for some good sources of information definitely the formula 1 app. i follow a bunch of accounts on ig like racing news (i would take them with a grain of salt. it good to see which rumours are out there but unless something is 100% confirmed/announced i don’t trust it), thef1girlies, maniaonboard, fanbehaviourf1pod and dishdoesf1! i follow just a ton of accounts and even if they’re not totally reliable its just information to sift through at least.

i also talk to my fiancé about things occasionally because he knows a lot more about racing than i do and doesn’t care for f1 pretty much so it’s an impartial opinion for sure.

god and yeah the race made me sooo stressed. i’m frustrated but overall feeling good about oscar’s win. im looking forward to how mclaren and the boys handle everything and also their races for the rest of the season. i hope this is a constructive thing for them all.

🤭 oh and yay the oscar agenda is SPREADING!!!! i’m so happy for him and i’m glad it wasn’t totally soured by mclarens fuck up. he deserved it, i’m sure he knows that.

#🤩anon #💌asks

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augustinescruelsummer · 3 years ago

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you found me | j.seresin

In which everything at her job reminds her of the messy broken up engagement of her and Jake Seresin. What happens when the risk of him coming back is probable? This is inspired by You Found Me by The Fray and uses lyrics. F!READER X J.SERESIN. lyrics are in italics <3. Anyway lmk if you want a part 2 love u guys!

AN: im so proud of this. pls be nice to me im 16 so ofc its not gonna be like insanely crazy writing. but i genuinely had the time of my life writing this, and i want it to serve as a reminder that your feelings are always valid. thank you for reading!

WC: 6.3k. | GIF CRED TO @unicornships

You wiped the pool table down, preparing to open your shift. The feint sound of F-18s soaring far away could still be heard from the beachside location of The Hard Deck, and the sound of the planes made you think of him. Like it did every time someone wearing a Naval uniform sauntered in here, and every time you looked longingly at them like they were him. Every time someone walked in with piercing green eyes and ordered a beer, you thought of him and the way he would look at you when you were both on the verge of falling asleep after a long night. The way he would come home and instantly yell out, “Honey, I’m home!” was brought back to your memory every time someone at the bar used the nickname for you.

Every time someone brought up their fiancé or their upcoming wedding, you would subconsciously twirl the nonexistent ring on that specific finger. You would remember how it felt to have a ring on said finger. When someone would ask you if you were married, you would politely tell them no and find a way to excuse yourself from the conversation. Nausea would always overwhelm you when someone brought up the topic, and it reminded you of how you always said you would flush it. You told them you did that whenever someone asked how bad it affected you. Yet, It still sat in your nightstand, never to be moved. The ring was the exact same as it was the day you took it off.

The bar was bustling by the time it opened, and you had been having a good day so far. The people were being kind to you, but that was mostly because many of them knew who you were. Your regulars stopped by to wish you happy holidays and you figured it was because they were all going on their lavish vacations soon. Christmas was still two weeks away and the decorations sprung around the bar made you remember how the holidays used to feel. Your second Christmas spent by yourself, but this year it’d be with Penny and Amelia at least. But it wasn’t with him.

You spurred yourself from the thought of him, choosing to push his face out of your mind for at least one shift. You couldn’t help thinking of him when working, because it was how you met. Beer cans were opened and celebrations were held, people chanting that it was never too early to celebrate the holidays. You found that sort of counterproductive, since the holiday season had a lot to do with religious purposes usually. Nevertheless, it wasn’t any of your business what people did with their own lives. Penny slid behind the counter, giving your shoulder a tight squeeze. “You seem off in space,” she said nonchalantly while she poured another beer. The bar was beginning to empty out because of the late hour. She shifted her weight and leaned on the side of the bar, raising an eyebrow at your mellow disposition. “What’s going on, kiddo?” She prompted, her soft brown eyes staring at yours. She had always assumed the role of a sister or mother to you, which was probably the latter. You shrugged and made up a bullshit lie to try and shake her, but she was not going to go down without a fight. “Is it the decorations?” She asked jokingly, but when your face tensed her smile dropped. “Is it Jake again, honey?”

The mention of his name made you instantly freeze. You slowly nodded your head and nodded your head over to the pool table, where a small mistletoe was hung by the small table. The site of it, after three years, still being there was surprising. You thought that restaurants would usually change their decoration layout, especially this one. But there it was, after all those years, still hanging. Its leaves pristine with a white glint in it, but you had to assume it was fake. You hoped it was fake. Because everything that came after the mistletoe appeared fake. Maybe some selfish part of your brain hoped this year a girl would kiss an aviator under the mistletoe and end up just like you. To prove to yourself they were all like this to women. It’s not a you problem, it’s just them, everyone had told you when you’d gone completely offline the days after. You needed to prove that there was something wrong with them and it had never been anything about you, and you thought that you owed yourself that much. And you did.

“Do you want me to take it down?” Penny asked you, sliding over to be closer to you as you stared at the stupid plant. “Did you know mistletoe is poisonous?” You blurted out to her, and pushed yourself off the bar. You tried to busy yourself with cleaning, squirting the already clean bar top with spray again to distract yourself from Penny’s pitiful gaze. “So are the people that go under it,” you added bitterly after a beat of silence. Penny sighed and took the bottle out of your hands gently, before telling you that you were done for the day.

You clocked in the next day, your mind indefinitely clearer. You had gone home, thrown some shit at the wall, cried, and gone to bed. You were done being sorry for yourself and the shit he put you through. Why should he have an impact on you right now, presently? He was somewhere off in the world, perfectly fine without you. Penny didn’t comment on your lifted mood, instead choosing to go with the flow of the situation. The mistletoe was still there and you had to resist the urge to go over there and break it apart leaf by leaf. The night moved on consistently, and a certain visitor had caught Penny’s eye. Amelia had called you over to ask about them, because both of you knew Penny never held conversation with singular men at her bar without reason. Not after her own version of your story.

“Who was that, Pen?” You asked nonchalantly, taking the beer she had poured out of her hands. She chuckled to herself, knowing that you were nosy as all get out. It didn’t bother her though, in fact, she needed to talk to someone about what she had just been told. “It was a guy who was close friends with Maverick,” she said to you, her face falling even at the mention of his callsign. You swallowed the lump in your throat, selfishly thinking of him even though she was talking about Maverick. “They think he’s going to come back,” she sighed heavily as she said it, like a weight was lifted off her chest. You squeezed the dishrag in your hand, losing your concentration as you thought of Navial Aviators coming back to North Island. “Hon!” Penny said imperatively, snapping you out of your train of thought. You had squeezed the rag so hard old beer and water had dripped onto your pants, but you were so entranced on the thought of aviators returning you chose not to take notice.

“I just know about Pete,” she informed you softly. “I’m excited to see him if he does come back, I suppose. I don’t know if Jake will come back with him, but I presume not. There’d be no reason too,” Penny continued, grabbing the dish rag out of your shaky hands. She was right, there was no reason for him to come back all these years. As if you being here would stop him, you were nothing, your brain said trying to beat you down. You pushed the thought out of your head to the best of your ability and shrugged your shoulders. “If he does, he does,” you tried to say as stable as you could. “But you know I’m here for you, Pen, if Maverick does come back. It won’t be easy, and you dont have to think it will be.” She nodded her head, quickly wrapping you in a hug before going to attend to another customer.

There were couples everywhere, Navy couples, to be more exact tonight. Your guess was that their training had ended early today, so they chose to take their girlfriends and wives down to The Hard Deck to drink. Saltily, you wanted to say that they only chose this place so they could drink without excuse and beg their significant others to buy them more. Aviators, you thought with an internal eye roll. The old juke box was playing an array of holiday and love songs, due to the amount of couples in the bar. You had been serving left and right, trying not to think about how the male would buy the drinks. He never did that towards the end. Your favorite song was playing through the bar, and the sound of it made you stop. You Found Me by The Fray was coming through the speakers loudly, and couples were preparing to dance on the main floor. You divert your eyes somewhere else, and they land by the pool table. Right as a naval aviator and his wife kissed under the mistletoe, to your lyric. Yours and his lyric.

Lost and insecure, You Found Me, You Found Me, lying on the floor.

The rock on her hand told you they were married, a step you never got the privilege to experience.

Just a little late, You Found Me.

You looked right away as their lips separated, and the whistles from the aviators nearby was enough to make you throw a glass if you could. The song especially overwhelmed you, and you aggressively poured beer as the song continued to play, and happy military wives sang the lyrics back to their husbands. The happy glint in their eyes as they stared up at their counterpart was enough to tell you that they were truly happy. Just like you thought you were with him. You looked down at the dinghy bar floor as the song ended, blinking away tears. How come they were entitled to it, the happy ending, and you weren’t?

The afternoons you worked were always the worst. Slow days, grumpy customers who thought they were entitled to everything, it was truly the whole package. You were tidying up tables when a man walked in, and he was neatly kept. He looked extremely nervous and you took your spot behind the bar as he walked up. He was wearing a TopGun bomber jacket, and your mouth dropped open. Maverick. You tried to play it cool, hoping Penny would stay in the backroom. Or maybe some part of you hoped she came out, and Pete would admit his fairy-tale feelings for her. They could have their happy ending. Just maybe that would be enough for you. But deep down, you knew nothing would ever be enough to satisfy the heartbreak. His aviators dimmed his facial expression, but based on the fact he kept rubbing his hands on his jeans, you knew he was nervous. “Can I help you?” You asked sweetly, but loudly. Ok, so maybe you do want Penny to come out here. Right as he opened his mouth to speak, Penny came barreling from the stockroom. A basket filled with glasses in both hands, and she made eye contact with Maverick instantly. It was like an invisible string would forever tie their presences together, because their eyes found each other instantly.

“Pen–” “Pete–”

The moment was shattered by the basket hitting the floor with a lound clang, and you instantly rushed over to grab it from the floor. Pete got out of his barstool, but you shooed him away. “I’ll let you guys catch up,” you told both of them, trying not to let your jealous tone of voice show. You picked up the basket with more force than necessary, and flung the door out to the beach. You knew Penny could tell you were jealous, but she also knew it was understandable. She also understood that some part of you wished he would come back. That he would say sorry and ask for forgiveness. Beg on his knees and tell you that it had always been you, no one else. But that didn’t happen.

You busied yourself by putting glasses on tables, making sure that the forks were properly in proportion with the knives. You never did that. The fear of walking in on Penny and Maverick having a forgiveness session consumed you, and you would spend all night out here if it meant avoiding that fate. Because you wanted to have that conversation so bad. You wanted to share with him the feelings and words that were stolen from you when he left without another word. There wasn’t a last kiss or last words spoken. There was nothing.

Penny called you back in an hour later, not sharing the details of the conversation, Her eyes were brimmed with tears, and you placed the empty basket on the table before rushing into her arms. Her tears flowed freelt when you hit her embrace, and she sobbed into your shoulder. “I don’t know if I can run the risk again,” she told you through tears. “My heart couldn’t do it.” You comforted her to the best of your ability, but it had never been your strong suit. You took her shift, offering to close for her tonight. She had resisted the offer but eventually gave in when you promised her you had it all under control. “You need to tell Amelia,” you had said. She finally caved after those words and grabbed her purse before hurrying out. The memories of you and the bar all came flooding back when you were by yourself here.

–

THREE YEARS AGO, DECEMBER

It was a cold night in California, which was a rare phenomenon for the usually hot state. You had a scarf wrapped around your neck, which you told your friend beside you that it made you feel a part of the holiday season officially. He laughed before opening the door for you into your favorite place ever, and his. “‘Ma lady,” he said jokingly while holding the door, and you dramatically sauntered into the bar. The place was lively, and couples were everywhere inside the bar. They danced to the music playing on the jukebox, but a mischievous Rooster stood irkingly close to the plug. The sight of all the aviators and the lovers made you smile, and you instantly pulled Jake towards the makeshift dance floor. This was your one off day from the bar, and on that day Penny had put all the decorations up. She gave you a cheery wave and her face lit up at the sight of you and Jake. The December air was still detectable in the bar, but you were so happy it didn’t even get to you. Jake played his usual round of pool, and you stood near him admiring him discreetly. Or so you thought. A tipsy Phoenix fell onto the couch beside you, her unexpected weight on the couch making you snap out of your admiration. She took a long swig of her bottle, biding her time, before throwing an eyebrow up at you. Her lips quirked, “When are you gonna ask him out?” She crossed one leg over the other and placed her chin on her hands, looking at you expectantly. If the question hadn’t caught you so off guard, you would’ve smiled at the sight. Phoenix usually had a serious disposition and it was rare to see her so carefree. She giggled at your silence and stricken expression, before giving your shoulder a light shove. “Our secret,” she put a finger to her lips and made a hush sound. Before you could respond to the scene, she got up suddenly. “Bob! I’m calling you for a dance, my wingman!” She took a last sip of her beer, shoving it into Fanboy’s hands before dragging Bob through the crowd to the center.

You sighed as you watched them become the center of attention, two of the top naval aviators having the time of their lives at a bar somewhere off the beaten path. “Penny for your thoughts, sweetheart?” His charming voice asked, and you cursed yourself for your cheeks warming up at the pet name. “Just thinking about all the dancing people,” you told him honestly, leaning back on the couch. Your hands were empty, choosing to be his designated driver for the night. You knew it was rare he got a day off, and you wanted him to have a couple drinks. He grinned, “You want to dance?” You shrugged, choosing to stay silent. He placed his chin on the pool stick, his smile growing as he stared down at you. After a couple more moments of staring, he held his hand out for you. You took it happily, standing up to face him. He threw his stick to the side before taking his hands in yours and swinging you around the pool table.

Where all my days were spent by a telephone that never rang.

“This is my favorite song!” You told him, and he smiled down at you not saying anything. He spun you around the pool table, and his dancing skills highly impressed you. This would be your favorite song, was all he thought as he led you into the center of the dance floor. All the couples were slow dancing, and even Phoenix and Bob had cleared the floor for this one.

And all I needed was a call that never came.

You leaned your head on his chest and let the lyrics swim in your brain. There were so many situations that came to your mind when you listened to this song, and it made tears brim to your eyes. “Eyes on me, pretty, this is a sweet moment.” You danced around the center before he led you back over to the pool table. His eyes looked into yours softly, and he tightened the arm around your waist. His thoughts were racing about if you thought this was simply a friendly dance, but he thought it was pretty clear there was more.

To the corner of First and Amistad?

He had your back against the pool table, his arms around your waist now. The pressure and tension in the situation was making your thoughts cloudy. His sharp jawline scanned the people nearby before letting his eyes locked on you. His eyes went above you guys, where a plant was hanging from the ceiling. He smirked down at you, and over the loudness of the song told you, “The plant never lies, sweetheart.”

Lost and insecure, You Found Me, You Found Me.

He kissed you. During your favorite line of the whole song. The entirety of the situation made you feel like you were floating on cloud 9, and you clawed at his naval uniform for something to grab. Something for you to ensure that this was real. That this was happening. You grabbed onto his collar, letting the lyrics be the only thing flowing through your mind. The powerful chorus that you had sobbed to many times before was now being woven with one of the happiest memories. He kissed you deeper with every time your lips met again, you slowly being pressed harder against the pool table. You pulled away finally when the chorus ended, both out of breath and in a haze. “We should do that more often,” he joked when he saw your face. You laughed at his humor and took his hand again, leading him through the crowd of the bar. You laughed your way out of the bar, letting the memory be created with the flow of the night.

For years and years and years and years, and you never left me no messages, you never sent me no letters.

The final faint lyrics, the sad ones, were the last ones to be heard as you and Jake left the bar. You were both still in your haze of falling for each other, and the fact you had kissed him. Little kisses were shared until you finally reached his truck, and he asked you if you were ready to go through with the night. You had agreed, the final lyrics of You Found Me fading away, seeming to be unimportant.

–

PRESENTLY

The memory was one so heavy on your heart it hurt to bear, and you turned the music on the jukebox down. You wondered if Penny and Maverick were having a secret rendezvous, the tears shed earlier completely forgotten whenever he was in front of her. Were they kissing like silly teenagers who were afraid to be caught? Would they ever admit they never officially fell out of love with each other? It all seemed so surreal, that Pete happened to come back just when Penny needed him. Something out of a movie, if you were being honest. You were never that fortunate, you thought negatively as you stared out the windows, looking at the beach you had spent many a night with. God, he was everywhere! His memory was always close by, mostly figuratively, but in some cases literally.

Penny had informed you that a group of 12 highly performing naval cadets were on their way to TopGun Academy, and that they had been called back. She had betrayed Maverick’s trust to tell you this, in secret of course, because you both knew what that meant. “Jake,” you murmured. The first time you had said his name out loud, after you stopped cursing his name within the walls of your apartment. “He’s most definitely in the top ten,” you told Penny. She snorted at the irony of you still managing to brag on him. The reality of him coming into the bar was real, especially with Maverick having come to visit earlier. It was only a matter of time. You had spent all these years thinking about the words you would spew at him, and how the anger would flow off your body so visibly anyone would notice. But in reality, you had thought the day would never come. What would you do when you saw him again? What would he do? You had to have meant something more than all the other girls, right? He put a rock on your hand. The rock. The vision of the ring itself was enough to make your face go pale. Or more, the vision of the rings. Sitting side by side in your nightstand, a reminder on how he walked out on the commitment he proposed. It would’ve been officially a year and a half of marriage today, and the thought of him seeing you on said day was scary enough. But truly, what were you going to say to him if you found the courage? There was so much you had wanted to say, but now the want was fading quickly. The year you had spent bottling up your feelings in hoping you would see him again was not coming into use.

The night was young, a new hour on the clock. Every time someone entered the bar you looked for a clean shaven and freshly groomed blonde man. With his sharp green eyes, there was no way you could miss him. You hadn’t even thought of the site of seeing your old friends. His old friends that had quickly become yours. With the messy way Jake had left things with you and them being stationed overseas, your ties and friendships with the other aviators had quickly dissipated. Jake’s wake had affected every aspect of your life, and you were still picking up the pieces. Now, with his coming back, he was here to wash it all away again. He was here to make you begin the healing process again. When you thought about it all as a whole, you had spent that year prepared and begging for a chance to see him again. But now that the chance was here, you realized how scarily unprepared you were to see his face again.

–

A YEAR AND A HALF AGO. JUNE.

The F-18s were flying in a straight line, clearly practicing some sort of exercise. What said exercise was remained unbeknownst to you, and you were staring in admiration at your aviator boyfriend. You were in shock at the set up of the base, and he had taken it to you for the first time on your three year anniversary. The thought of the whole idea was enough to make your heart melt into a line, because you knew Jake feared taking you on base. The F-18s flying earlier landed smoothly in their spots, and Jake’s tour guiding was cut short by your squeal. “”Tasha!” You cried out in joy, running down the tarmac to greet her. You jumped into her arms, and she hugged you tightly. “I’ve missed you, honey!” Jake’s crew had fallen into the routine of calling you that, and claimed it was your own personal call sign. They said it was because of how sweet you were. Coyote had ended the night with a painful rib bruise after he seductively said you were, “sweet like honey.”

Phoenix gave Jake a wink, knowing the events of tonight that were coming. You peeled yourself off Phoenix to give Bob a hug, along with the rest of the group. They all trotted off to the common room, giving Jake the same look. Jake was happy around you, and it influenced him positively in the field. He aided his teammates when they needed it, always a team player. Him and Rooster worked well as a cooperative team, and they all knew they would be back to TopGun Academy sooner or later. They were the best of their kind, and no one would ever be able to compare to their skill. They were a team like no other, and the Navy adored having them around.

Jake pointed out his locker and showed all the pictures he had of you stuck inside of it. You had teased him about putting an excess amount of pictures of you in his locker, to which he had responded by saying that there could never be enough. You both blushed at the exchange, and he quickly ushered you along. His plane sat in the center between Fanboy and Payback’s jets. He popped the cockpit and climbed up, retrieving two polaroids. They were both from the same night, and the thought of him keeping them in his plane made joyful tears come to your eyes. “No crying, baby!” He had said quickly, trying to fan your tears away because he knew you hated it when your mascara got screwed up for stupid reasons. Those reasons included crying. You had gaven him a deep kiss for that with your back against his F-18, until two new cadet wolf-whistled at the scene. Jake had quickly ushered you away, even though he told you later how hot he thought the whole scene was.

He had tried to get you guys cleared to take a trip in his F-18, but Cyclone had quickly shut the idea down. “Are you out of your fucking mind, Seresin?” Was what he actually said, but then briskly apologized for using profanity. It was an outlandish request and a rare one at best. Usually cadets did not have the balls to ask their admiral to take their jet on a joyride. Jake had grinned at his rejection and told him it was no big deal. He expected it, but still got his normal plan approved. His team had all given a unanimous cheer when he walked out with a shit-eating grin and a thumbs up.

Later that night, Jake led you out onto the tarmac to show you the stars from there. He had his helmet in his left hand, the other around your waist as you pointed out your favorite constellations from the ground. He rested his chin on your head, rubbing both his arms up and down your shoulders to keep you warm. He listened to you softly ramble on, until the soft rumble of the jets was heard from behind you guys. You stopped talking, your mind short circuting as you saw the unmistakable quartet fly on opposite sides of the base. Their jet fuel left a mark in the sky, and you watched in awe as they flipped over each other. How did he even get this approved? You wondered to yourself, knowing he definitely downplayed the tricks to the admiral. The jets flew lower to the ground, beginning to land parallel to each other. You were yet to notice, but Rooster was shielded to the side with a firework pump. The hood of the planes came up, and Phoenix, Bob, Payback, and Fanboy all stood up to watch the scene. The fireworks came off as they all stood to their full heights in the planes, and you whipped your head to ask Jake what the hell was happening. A gasp left your mouth as you saw him knelt down on one knee, with a box popped open.

“Baby, from the second I saw you, I knew you were it for me. I have to make it official before the Navy sends me off again. Please, will you marry me, pretty?”

Of course you said yes.

Two months later, when you thought you and your fiancé were preparing to marry each other, everything came crashing down. At first you thought it was a sick joke. The bed was cold, an unusual feat for Jake. You knew the mission was four days out, and you were supposed to be at the courthouse today. He hadn’t told you anything about it, just that it was ‘simple’. There were no difficult G’s that had to be reached or anything to your knowledge, but yet he had looked so scared the past couple of days. You looked over at the bedroom clock in your shared bedroom, seeing that it was seven exactly. Jake’s sheets were crumpled as if he had been tossing, and that’s when you noticed. His closet door was thrown open, the majority of his clothes missing. The hangars tossed in a pile at the foot of it. You slowly got out of bed, your mouth running dry. He had taken his plaques off the wall, and in a hurry you ran to the bathroom.

Gone.

Every toiletry he used had been clearly packed up, his toothbrush dry in his holder. Your heart was beating faster and faster, your hands shaking, and you felt like you were going to pass out. You leaned by the toilet but nothing came out. In a daze, you rushed out of the bathroom flying down the stairs. Praying that Jake just had to leave early or something, and you would grab your phone and see everything was fine. Or maybe a note downstairs, telling you it was an urgent call. Deep down in your heart, you knew he was gone. You flung yourself down the stairs, when an unmistakable light caught your eye. His ring. The morning light ahd caught onto the rock, making it shine brighter. The irony of that. A handwritten note was sitting under it, and you grabbed the paper with shaky hands. There were only four lines on it.

If you love something, set it free.

I have to do that with you. I know you won’t be able to handle me in the military.

I have to do this for me and you.

-Jake

–

PRESENTLY

The memory was sucking the energy out of you as you stood in the backroom, your mind heavy. It felt like it was weighing the rest of your body down, and you had no idea if you could go on with the rest of your shift knowing he could walk in the door. It was all flying straight to your head more than you assumed it was. God, you needed to shake yourself out of this. The backdoor flung open on time, one of your other coworkers who barely worked calling you back out. “It’s getting busy!” She called, not bothering to hear your response as the door flung shut. You washed your hands briskly and then continued to tie your waist apron with shaky hands. Your reflection in the mirror stared back at you for a long moment, and you splashed water on your face. Hoping to remove the forlorn expression the thought of him left on you. Not bothering to look at your new reflection after, you swung the backdoor open and stepped into the bar. The backroom was located by the pool table, and a group of tan uniforms caught your eye. You instantly hung back, scanning the group for him. A few familiar faces lit a fire in your heart, the faces of Phoenix and Bob. They were yet to notice you, and they were engaged in a casual conversation.

Their uniforms adorned all their honors, which had growned significantly since you had seen them last. A sense of pride beamed in your heart as you hurried over to the bar, which faced away from the table. You snuck a look at the group as your shift went on. The hard to miss buzzcut of Fanboy was unmistakbale in the group of cadets, and he was accompanied by a smiling Payback. Bob’s glasses adorned his face like usual, and he swung his head around to the bar as you were looking at him. You quickly slid behind the liquor wall, hoping that you avoided his gaze. You weren’t ready to see them. You had no idea how they felt about you. Unbeknownst to you, the team that seemed unbreakable had fallen apart quickly after Jake left. His reputation grew stomped on and ugly, growing notorious for the opposite of things he was originally known for. The team disbanded when the Navy realized they were not the same anymore, and the chemistry faded just as quickly.

He came in about an hour later. His face adorned with his infamous smirk, and his uniform clad body. Your heart stopped when he stepped in, but he completely by-stepped the bar to see some old friends. You were cleaning tables when he entered, but of course you noticed. You could feel him the second he appeared. The song playing in the jukebox was ironic for the situation. You had successfully evaded the cadets, but you knew that it wouldn’t work for much longer. They were caught up in the fact their team was reunited for an unknown purpose, and the missing precense of Rooster and Jake.

“Bagman!” Phoenix called out, “I like the new callsign.”

“It’s Hangman, Phoenix,” he snapped coldly, taking a poolstick straight out of an unsuspecting cadet's hands.

In the end, everyone ends up alone. But losing her, the only one who’s ever known.

His cold tone made you grimace, and you stayed wiping the same table down. Unfortunate for you, your stupid ‘call sign’ had managed to follow you in to the bar, and when a customer shouted it to grab your attention, heads snapped instantly.

“She’s here?” Hangman asked, and when you both made eye contact it felt like the world froze. You needed to rewind. He wasn’t here. He was just a piece of your imagination. You could blink and he’d be gone, replaced with Coyote’s build. But you knew he wouldn’t be. The other cadets instantly tensed up at the interaction between you, no matter how small it was. You swiftly moved between tables, ignoring Jake calling your nickname. The fact he was coming after you was enough to make you move between dancing couples quicker than ever.

You found me, you found me, lying on the floor, surrounded. Why’d you have to wait? Where were you? Just a little late.

You burst out the backdoor and ran down the porch steps, letting the California breeze bring you to the beachside. The soft hum of your song playing behind you as you looked out onto the water, hopefully shielded from the windows.

Inside, Jake was getting into another tussle with his former team. “I have to talk to her,” he told them with a cold expression. He was trying not to let his facade crack, but it was obvious it cracked the moment he saw you. For a moment, when your eyes met, his face returned to the Jake that the team of daggers had always known. The Jake that wasn’t known for being Hangman.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Phoenix warned carefully, placing her hand on Hangman’s waist in an attempt to hold him back. She knew he was going after you anyway, but she at least wanted to give you some time to yourself. They all knew where you were going. The beach where you always met Jake after rough training sessions. Jake knew exactly where to go, and it was like his mind was on autopilot as he glided between chairs and tables. People and couples danced to his song. “Honey!” He called out, getting a glimpse of your tear brimmed face as you fled the bar. He ran down the steps, trying to catch up to you. You suddenly whipped your head around, not realizing how close he was. The softness of the song from The Deck still playing out on the beach.

Where were you? Where were you?

“You said you needed space, Jake. You were 5,000 miles away in God knows where for a year and a half, and suddenly you think that we’re fine. You wanted space, and now I want it. I want to put a whole fucking universe between us so I don’t have to be reminded of your face and the joy you brought me. Love was not supposed to hurt like that, J.”

The nickname you had always used for him. The letter you wore around your neck on a gold initial for your relationship, one of the first gifts Jake had gotten you.

“Please,” he begged reahcing his hands out for you, “Just let me talk to you.”

“I don’t hate you,” you told him with tears streaming down your face, “after the year we spent apart, Jake, I still can’t hate you. I want to, so bad it hurts. But I can’t. You’ll always have that piece of my heart that I’ll never get back.”

Why’d you have to wait, to find me, to find me?

#hangman #hangman fic #hangman x you #hangman x reader #top gun hangman #top gun #top gun maverick #top gun maverick imagine #topgun #jake seresin #jake seresin fic #jake seresin x reader #jake seresin x you

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cherievol6 · 3 years ago

Text

not waiting around - pt II

read part I

AND BREATHE. this is my fourth draft of this. FOURTH. i changed it so so so many times, but i hope you're happy with it, because i'm pretty happy with it. can you tell which song i used for inspo? pls pls pls like/reblog, i work so hard on my stuff. . .love u all so much - M

also little banner for visuals...

engagements bring out the softie in harry, and time apart most definitely does make the heart grow fonder

word count: 3.3k (slay)

warnings: swearing!!! (they're british, it's a given), fluff fluff fluff i love them sm, there may be some cringey parts, not sorry x

“You’re such a blunt texter.” Harry laughs as he enters your bedroom, eyes finding your head poking out of the swirls of white covers. He drops his overnight bag on to the vintage chair in the corner of the room and braces his arms over your head.

You frown up at him and his smile grows wider. “I’m not.”

“You never put kisses on your texts anymore.” He notes, leaning down to peck the corner of your mouth. You feel your stomach flip at this; how did he notice something so little in the change of your behaviour? You were trying to shake the petty feelings you had by treating him as you would any random hook-up, but he made it very difficult.

“I sometimes draft them, but you never put them back, so I delete them.” Your voice is almost embarrassed as you say it. Harry frowns, tilting his head. You watch as his hair falls with him.

“Don’t delete the kisses,” he mumbles, gently kissing your mouth and mumbling against your lips, “they’re cute.”

The memory from months ago flashes through your head as you stare down at the drafted text message on your phone, the line flashing next to the words ‘we should talk later’. Harry’s number is still saved into your phone, a small picture of him wearing your scrunchie and a pink mask spread around his face sits above his name, squeezing your heart painfully.

“Shit.” You sigh, deleting the four words and locking your phone, placing it down on the table and glancing up at Sarah showing off her ring to some of your mutual friends, hers and Mitch’s eyes sparkling akin to the small diamond on her finger. It was depressing, really, observing all of your friends around you settling down and getting engaged, whilst you were still emotionally getting over a casual fling. It didn’t help that you had perfect view of Harry’s back as he sat and talked to Sarah’s parents merely a stone’s throw away. You sometimes caught snippets of his laugh, or mumblings of a joke that made Sarah’s father cackle loudly.

His eyes had followed you when you arrived, passing Sarah and Mitch an expensive bottle of wine, hands nervously brushing down your powder blue dress. You had finally met Harry’s eyes as they fawned over the present, him barely lifting the corner of his mouth before turning and walking into the garden, downing the glass of prosecco in his hand. When Sarah gave you a sad smile as you turned back, you knew immediately that Harry had told Mitch everything, and he’d most likely filled the gaps for his fiancée.

It was safe to say after that small encounter you scurried to the other side of the garden and planted yourself at a small table that was furthest from the mingling crowd. This was the last place you wanted to be.

The sun set beautifully over Sarah’s Hampstead home and an old record crooned through the speakers at the patio doors. It was springtime now, the cold memory of when you left Harry’s house in January still sitting bitterly in your chest. Since that moment, you both had only shared fleeting glances on group nights out, or stiffly interacting when you were round at Sarah’s for game night. It was torture not being able to share illicit kisses in the foyer like you used to, Harry usually tugging your arm and pressing you against the wall, “to tide me over until later” he would say, a searing kiss punctuating it before he slunk back off to the living room. What once was thrilling had now turned sour and dormant.

Sarah came and checked on you after many photos, and you could tell her socially awkward side was starting to rear its head as more family members tried to shove their cameras in her face.

“Wanna get a drink?” You laugh, and she nods enthusiastically, blowing her bangs out of her face and grabbing your hand. She pours you both a wine once you’re away from the crowds, the music turning to a mere humming that lulled your anxiety. Parties weren’t usually your thing, and Harry’s presence normally helped. This time, however, it was making it slightly worse. You catch Sarah clinking her ring against her glass and you grin.

“I’m so happy for you, Sar.” A hand squeezes her shoulder, and she thanks you, laying her palm on top of yours gently. You stand in silence together and sip your drinks, both needing the breather from the intense atmosphere.

“So, when are you and H going to make up, and stop moping around at my party?” She quips. Your drink slips down an awkward part of your throat that makes you splutter; you fan your watery eyes until your coughing subsides.

“God, Sarah.” You sigh.

“Hey! I don’t know what happened,” you shoot her a pointed look, “but I can tell that you’re both sad. Harry’s been writing more than ever, too.”

“Isn’t that a good thing?” You ignore the strange feeling you get at the thought of being Harry’s subject of his songs. Of his sad songs, at that. You rest your free hand against your sternum to calm your heartbeat.

“He’s been a right grump these past few weeks. Some of his sessions with Mitch have ended up going on through the night, I’m a bit worried about him.”

Your eyes sting and Sarah’s voice softens. “I’ve been worried about you, too.”

“I’m fine. He told me in our last conversation that he thinks he still loves his ex, so…s’probably who he’s writing about.” You shrug, and Sarah frowns.

“Harry hasn’t seen her in ages, Y/N—” Her voice dims as a familiar pair of boots click into the kitchen. You clear your throat and turn the other way, pretending to busy yourself with pouring more wine.

“Oh, hey. We were just…getting a drink.” Sarah’s sheepish voice gives you both away immediately, though you’re pretty sure Harry heard the last few sentences of your conversation.

The air is stagnant and uncomfortable before Harry lets out a loaded huff. You can feel his stare like pin pricks all over your back.

“I haven’t seen her since that night, Y/N.” He says stiffly, completely ignoring Sarah. Your hands tremble as you place the wine bottle down and turn around slowly, glancing at Harry’s face. You expect to see a stony expression, but his eyes are softened and sad-looking, his mouth turned down. Sarah rubs your shoulder and slinks out of the kitchen, a gentle hand on Harry’s back conveying the same message.

“I-“ Your voice is weak. You try to say something, anything, but the words die in your throat. You look down at your feet and then back to Harry’s face. God, Sarah was right. His under eyes are deep grey from lack of sleep. You begin to well up. It was all too much, properly speaking to Harry for the first time in weeks, seeing him looking all sorry for himself, hearing that he was writing about you.

“Oh, Y/N.” He sighs regretfully, running a hand through his longer hair. Sounds of kids squealing in the back garden make him on edge, you can tell with the way he begins cracking his knuckles against his thigh.

“I’m sorry.” Your voice is thick from the tears.

“No, no. I don’t wanna hear any of that.” He shakes his head, moving closer and placing his wine glass down next to yours. He looks down at you but doesn’t make a move to touch you in any way. It makes more tears fall.

“Harry, why haven’t you been sleeping?” You whisper to him sadly, your hand unconsciously resting on his wrist. All you can think about is what Sarah said about his emotional state since that day, was he really that hung up about it?

He swallows and looks down at your touch, eyebrows furrowing.

“Felt lonely without you there.” He shrugs, itching the tip of his nose as his eyes begin to sting and redden. You sigh and slip your hand into his before he can object. Noise clatters from somewhere in the house followed by a string of conversation and you come back down to earth quickly.

“If we’re gonna talk, we need to do it privately.” You squeeze his hand and he nods, squeezing it back before leading you out of the kitchen, his tall frame hiding your bleary eyes as he guides you to the familiar entryway to the house. Sarah’s foyer to her front door is closed off from the rest of the house, giving you both a semblance of privacy.

“Why here?” you mutter, wrapping your arms around yourself at the draft. He almost looks hurt at your question.

“Dunno. Was kind of our place, no?.” He’s clipped with his tone, but it juxtaposes his actions as he slips his expensive cardigan off his shoulders and drapes it over your shoulders. You watch his face closely as he fits it over your body, having no choice with the small space you had to stand in. You mull over the use of ‘our’ in his reply.

“Harry.” You mumble. He hums.

“I’m sorry for storming out.” It just comes out of you, not feeling like tiptoeing around the subject any longer. He freezes and bites the inside of his cheek.

“I deserved it. Stop apologising, alrigh’? S’me that should be doing it first.” His hands stay perched on your shoulders gently, warming every cell and sensory in your body.

“I’m sorry if it seemed like I was leading you on, or anything,” one of his hands lifts to brush your hair away from your face, “truthfully, I was trying myself to hide my own feelings. I was scared that I was the one who’d fallen first, Y/N.” Your heart starts to thud a bit harder in your chest

“So why did you react so badly, when I first told you that night I was drunk?” Your tears have dried up now and your tone is slightly hostile. He was always just so…fucking confusing.

“I got scared. I don’t know, like you were just saying it because you were drunk, and you didn’t actually mean it.” He says nervously. You’d never considered that to be the reason for his apprehensiveness, although it didn’t sound like the strongest argument for how he’d reacted.

“God, Harry. It really upset me, you know?” He nods profusely and holds the guiltiest look on his face, eyes glancing down at your lips before travelling up your face. Your eyes hang on his lips too, wanting that intimacy you hadn’t felt from him in so long. At this point, you weren’t sure if you were even upset anymore, this hurt had dragged on for so long that you were just yearning for some semblance of normality with him.

“I know, I know. I regretted it when you came to my house with all my stuff that day. I could tell that you were really hurt. I-I guess I spat out my feelings to you so you wouldn’t leave. It really fucking hurt watching you walk back down the driveway, too. And I can’t wear that teddy bear ring anymore…” He’s rambling at this point and you place your hands on his jaw to slow him down.

The air feels dense around the two of you, and it seems you’re both waiting for the right time to act on what you’re feeling. He missed you, you missed him. Would it be so bad?

“Harry.” You breathe. He calms down, eyes searching yours before he surges forward and fits your mouths together for what feels like the first time in eternity, seemingly reading your mind and beating you to the punch. He breathes harshly through his nose at the contact, humming contently against your mouth as he lulls you through a long and needy kiss, tilting your head back on your neck for easier access. His fingers are delicate, stroking your cheek, your jaw, your hair.

“I don’t even care about her. Not one bit.” He heaves out in between kisses, and you whimper, locking your arms tightly around his neck. You break from the kiss and he kisses your cheekbones, rubbing his nose against yours as you catch your breath.

“You’re so confusing. Really make my head spin, y’know?” Your eyes close as his hands travel to grip your waist tightly.

“I know. You don’t need to be confused now, yeah? M’right here.” He’s on your neck now, kissing soft trails from your ear to your collar bone. His head finally rests in your neck however, not seeming to initiate anything you thought he would. All you can feel is the rhythmic breaths coming from his lips that spread over your collarbones.

“Harry?” Your voice is soft but airy, still out of breath from the intense kiss you just shared.

“I’ve really missed how you smell, y’know? So sweet.”

“Okay, vampire.” You laugh. He lifts his head with amused yet bleary eyes meeting yours, muttering a ‘shut up’ at your teasing. Truthfully, you knew exactly what he meant. You’d missed the smell of his aftershave lingering around your place, his washing powder on your sheets. You just missed him.

“I miss you leaving little things around my house. Found your lilac bra the other day, y’know? Torture.” He sighs, you clear your throat in attempt to will away the heat from your cheeks. You’d been searching for that bra just last week.

“Is that all you miss? My lingerie?” You scoff – although joking, it was a question that had been sitting in the back of your head for quite some time. What exactly did he miss? Just the sex, or you holistically?

He kisses you again, nipping at your lips.

“Miss the little puffs that came out of your lips when you were fast asleep. The scrunchies I find in every bloody place.” He laughs, listing off each thing between a delicate peck, “miss your smile. I just miss you.”

“I missed you too Harry, s’much.” Your breath is airy, the sheer amount of emotion weighing down your larynx, almost making it impossible to form a sentence. He almost seemed to render you speechless when he was like this, all soft and kind. The Harry that made you fall in love with him.

“Yeah?” You shiver at his tone.

You nod, “I almost texted you earlier, was kind of hoping we’d be able to talk. I’m glad you barged in on mine and Sarah’s conversation now.”

“Why didn’t you text?” He runs his thumb along where he was biting at your lips.

“I was scared you’d tell me to fuck off.” You laugh, “or worse, watch you from a few metres away reading the text and ignoring it.”

He shakes his head. “Y/N, you know I wouldn’t have done that.” You shrug, feeling your insecurity rising. Someone slinks past the door to the foyer and you both have bated breath until they move away. Harry has a frown on his face when he looks back at you.

“Did you even believe what I said that day?” His insecurity is showing now, and a resounding knock on the door makes you release your grip that was still on the back of his neck, interrupting the heavier content of the conversation.

“I’m fucking in love with you, you know that?” He yells as you’re halfway through the threshold of the door. You wish that this was like a film or something, that you’d stop in your tracks and turn back to him, running into his arms and making up in the beat of a heart. But this was real-life, real-life feelings and real hurt that you were feeling. You turn around, tears falling freely now.

“No you’re fucking not.” You whisper. His hand slips to your cheek and he has a pained look on his face and you’re shaking your head with your eyes screwed shut. He tries to convince you with small murmurs of your name.

A friend of Sarah’s pops her head round the door, informing you both that a toast was about to happen, and Mitch had given a very grumbled request that they be there. You both slip out to the garden with around five seconds between your entrances, but you’re fully aware of how suspicious it looks. You stand a bit away from Harry now, hands trembling slightly from where the conversation left off. Was that it? The moment you’d wished for since the day of your argument, the moment Harry would tell you he loved you, and actually meant it? You shake off the question, locking your eyes on the couple before you.

“Everyone here? Good.” Mitch grins, and it’s a weird sight to say at the least.

“We wanted to thank you all for attending our little do, though it turned out to be a bit of a soiree, thank you Harry.” Sarah jokingly grits his name through her teeth and it draws a laugh from the crowd. Harry knew people, and he knew how to throw a party. Harry jokingly bows and a string of secondary laughs buzz through the crowd.

“I promised I’d take this one, since, you know, Mitch is such the talker,” he gives her a faux-stern look, nothing even remotely bitter in his eyes, just pure and unadulterated love. The sun peeks over the distant houses and hills of England, and you breathe in the air. It was a perfect scene and it blossomed that already-blooming seed of love in your stomach.

“I guess, us finding one another was unexpected. Not the bad kind of unexpected though, and I’m eternally grateful to whatever force brought us together, I guess. You make me better, and you make my life brighter, and louder, and a bit more bearable.” Sarah’s voice is quiet and wobbly, and you feel your throat catching. Mitch looks the most emotional you’ve ever seen him. “I felt silly telling you I loved you that first time, because I didn’t possibly think you could love me back. But you did, and you do, every single waking moment. Looking back, I think it’s ridiculous to push those feelings away, or even doubt them at all. If you love, love to your highest count, y’know, as cheesy as it sounds. Let those people know, because it might be your last chance.” she laughs, wiping tears from her pink cheeks. Mitch grabs her hand and squeezes it and you hear a few sniffles in the crowd, people clapping and cheering and hooting. Tears silently slip down the scape of your cheekbones and some kind of pull forces you to look in Harry’s direction, his eyes already on you, consuming you. He's got tears falling out of his eyes too, hands clapping but paying no attention to the celebration around him. He shakes his head at you in disbelief, a laugh falling from his lips. There’s a small vacuum and It feels like you and Harry are the only ones in it for a moment, Sarah’s voice tuning out.

“I love you. I love you so much.” He mouths, but you can see every syllable, every word, and God, can you feel each word too.

People file away from the huddle towards a table laid with food and drink, leaving you both under the cast of the setting sun. His face glows like a beacon.

You carry yourself over to him and submit to his hold, leaning all of your both physical and emotional weight against him as he kisses you with every fibre of his being. You both laugh in between the movements, unbothered by the possible attention of others around you as you turn your heads in tandem. His hands grip your waist so tightly you fear he might break you, but some part of your brain is more than okay with that. The kiss isn’t anything more than delicate touches, saving the indulgent ones for when you’re in private.

“I love you too. I did those months ago and I still do.” You whisper, kissing his cheek, his mouth, the mole next to his mouth. He holds you to his chest as you both stop to look at each other. The peace you had been seeking finally sets in as you brush his hair around his face. His eyes bounce around your face as he breathes out his next words, that make your heart contract.

“You’re everything I’ve ever wanted. You’re my girl.”

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kieranculkingirl · 2 years ago

Text

hey everyone! i really hate to have to do this and i’ve never asked for money online before but i have never been more in need. me and my fiancé are both chronically ill and my fiancé specifically hasn’t been able to work due to it. i’m the only one in my apartment bringing in even a little money right now and having to support two other roommates with what i make.

rent is due in a couple days and we don’t have close to enough to cover it. add to that our energy bill which is already a month late and now has late fees and the next month added to the total, and the fact that we barely have enough to buy groceries or the antibiotics i just got prescribed.

i would really really appreciate any help i can get, even just a reblog helps so much and even just a dollar or two would benefit us!

my v*nmo: amandanw17 (pls excuse my deadname)

vnmo is ideal but i can also send my p*yp*l or c*shpp if u message off anon

i’m setting a goal of $400 to start!

#this is. a lot of anxiety for me to post but yeah literally anything helps and i will be so endlessly grateful for anything #em.txt

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n1k1tty · 3 years ago

Text

enhypen reacting to you saying ‘i want a baby’

희승 [heeseung]

- you guys were just cuddling on a rainy day

- and then you came across a video of a cute baby

- and then you just started searching for more. then BAM 💥: baby fever

- HONESTLY I FEEL LIKE HE’D BE THE ONE TO ASK

- like he was watching tiktoks with you too

- and then he suddenly just says “i want a baby”

- and then u were like “ME TOO”

- you both just started watching more baby videos bcs you both love babies very much

- “how about we just adopt a pet. i don’t want to see you hurting for 9 months yet ;(“

- HES SO SWEET😡🤬

제이 [jay]

- u guys were in a cafe just for funzies😝

- and a kid ran up to you and handed you a flower bcs he thought u were pretty

- jay swore he felt like destroying the whole world so no one could harm you after seeing your smile

- after the kid left you were like “babe i want a baby😕”

- literally chokes on his drink

- “how can you say such thing out of the blue😃”

- he knows how much u like babies.

- pls his heart literally aches (in a good way) whenever he sees you play with his nephew 😩😩

- “we’ll have our own family when you’re ready. we’re still young after all” he plays with your hair

- when i tell you, your heart felt like it was gonna explode

- “you better keep your promise😡”

- yea he became ur fiancé like a few months later or whatever 😃🙌🏼

제이크 [jake]

- LOOK 🧍🏻‍♀️ I FEEL LIKE HED TOTALLY AGREE WITH YOU

- he loves children, he’s just bad with them LMAO

- like you went to ur niece’s bday party ur her favourite aunt

- and like u gave her to jake because you had to do something

- AND THE BABY STARTED CRYING LMAO

- jake was so sad cuz he really wants to be good with children

- and then you couldn’t help but smile at the sight of him trying to get along with her

- outta nowhere u were like “jakey, i want a baby :(“

- he laughs “i want one too, BUT OUR KID WILL PROBABLY END UP HATING ME”

성훈 [sunghoon]

- LMAO I FEEL LIKE HE’D BE THE TYPE TO HATE CHILDREN

- i can picture him fighting the urge to trip todlers

- but like when he saw you smiling widely when you were taking care of his niece, he couldn’t help but picture a family with you

- and just as if u read his mind you were like “when will you marry me🙄 i want a baby already”

- HE GETS SO FLUSTERED EVEN THOUGH U WERE JOKING

- “soon enough baby. just wait”

- YOU WANTED TO RUN 200 LAPS. BCS BOY DID U NOT EXPECTED HIM TO ANSWER LIKE THAT

- “after all i still have to take care of our baby gaeul— and you too…..i guess🙄”

- whatever 😁 you knew he was head over heels for you

선우 [sunoo]

- either hates kids or loves them LMAO nothing in between

- he knew how much you liked kids so he would often bring you to his family parties so you could play with his baby cousins/nieces and nephews

- his aunts would always remind him how much they liked you every time he brings you

- while you guys were walking home you were suddenly like “sun, can we have babies when we’re married”

- he’s like 😳😧🤭 “of course 😁!!”

- “you promise?”

- “duh😟”

정원 [jungwon]

- AAAAA DONT GET ME STARTED WITH THIS MAN

- bad with babies pt.2

- he’s such a caring person so i feel like he’d like babies tho LMAO

- you came over at his place and his parents weren’t home for the weekend

- (act as if he has a baby brother) and like he literally loves seeing you getting along well with his brother

- but at the same time hates it cuz his brother is stealing u away from him🙄😒

- him and his brother were bickering over who u liked more

- “y/n noona, who do you like more? jungwon hyung or me?😁”

- “you of course!” he gives you a big hug

- JUNGWON GETS JEALOUS LMAO “hey! that’s my girlfriend >:( go get one yourself!” literally hugs u away from his brother

- while they walk you home u were like “won, i want a baby“

- he just laughs “aren’t we still young? i dont wanna see you suffer just yet.” pt.2 PLS HES SO SWEET💔

니키 [niki]

- SO BAD WITH KIDS LMAKDNCOSNFKWK

- you let him hold your niece and she starts crying pt.2

- you start laughing at him cuz he didn’t know what to do

- “y/n stop laughing and help me!”

- the baby immediately stops crying when she’s in your arms

- “bruh, the baby definitely has favourites😒”

- “maybe ur just bad with children.” you laugh

- “i’ll get better once we have our own” he rolls his eyes🙄

- YOU ALMOST DROPPED THE BABY

- “yeah but what if—“

- “no what ifs🙄 you better still be with me after 14 years or the world is ending”

YALLLLLL 🧍🏻‍♀️ ONCE AGAIN THANKS FOR 100 FOLLOWERS. AYO⁉️⁉️⁉️

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rrazor · 4 years ago

Text

hq boys post wisdom teeth extraction

tags: fluff, soft boyfies lol

kuroo tetsurou wakes up and immediately the first thing he tells the professionals around him is that he wants to see his girlfriend because he knows you’re waiting for him and “i love her so much 🥺🥰" he says it a few more times and everyone laughs at how doped up he is both from the drugs and you. when you walk in to take notes on how to take care of him afterwards, he just stares at you as he holds you hand with the SOFTEST LOOK on his face like 🥺😍☺️❤️💕💖💝🥺🥰💖💝☺️

tetsu cannot stop looking at you and u almost have to plead with him to watch where’s he walking like tetsu pls we don’t wanna have to come back to get your front teeth done sweetie 🅱️lease!!!!!! other than that he is pretty easy to reason with it as long as you promise to kiss every part of his face once in a particular order and if u mess up, unfortunately, you’ll just have to start over again sigh it makes his heart go 💥💥💥

bokuto kuroo offers to drive him back home and brings you along to support and comfort him. he helps kou get into the back with you but he refuses and goes “kuroooooo, she’s too pretty, I dun wanna sit next to her ☹️” LMFAO kuroo rolls his eyes and just sits him down and buckles him in despite his protests HA

kou is super nervous and keeps looking over you when he thinks you aren’t looking like 🥺😊 and you decide to play along and ask him how he’s feeling and if he’s in pain and he shakes his head and goes “‘m okay, you’re really pretty though 🥺😍” kuroo snorts in the front seat and you’re trying rlly hard to not laugh at how cute he is so you take his hand and kou lit rally thinks he’s gonna pass out when you call him handsome and ask him out before kissing his cheek. he starts crying as he says things like “kuroo!!!! the pretty girl is my girlfriend now!! 🥺❤️😭💖💕😭😭🥳”

akaashi you’re already by his side by the time he wakes up but he doesn’t remember jack so he goes “hello, have u seen my girlfriend? she looks just like you. can u tell me if u see her? I would like to see her—she’s my everything 😊🥰” UGGHH KISS HIIMMM

he doesn’t remember who you are until the medication wears off but you manage to convince him that you’re gonna take him to his girlfriend so you can take him home 💀 and he spends the whole car ride really pretty quiet until you ask him why he’s so fidgety and then he softly tells you “i… can’t wait to see my girlfriend 🥺🥰💕 she said we’d go on an ice-cream date after🍦i hope she’s not mad that it’s been so long 🥺❤️💗” AHDHJANAA like a little happy babyyyy 🥺😭

oikawa tooru’s procedure finishes earlier than expected and has a dental hygienist watching over him as they wait for you and for some reason he starts to sing, but it’s really out of tune because of all the cotton in his mouth and the dental hygienist is just standing there, taking it. you can hear him down the hall as you walk into his room and he’s so excited to see you!!! “did you hear me sing for you, babe? i didn’t want you to get lost in this maze 🥺🥰” “yes, i did, tooru, tysm you don’t have to sing anymore 😊😇💕”

tries to pull you into his lap as the dentist goes through the aftercare procedures and whines “pleasssseeeee, it huuurrrrrttttts i just want cuddddlllleesssss 😭☹️🥺💕” you opt to sit on the edge of the chair as he buries his head in your back 🥰

iwaizumi YOU try to flirt with hajime because he doesn’t remember that you’re his girlfriend and he’s all like stop!!! i have a girlfriend! 😡 AHAHA so you decide to ask him about his lovely girlfriend and he gets the softest smile on his face omggg and he starts going on about how hardworking you are ❤️, determined 💘, beautiful 💖, how nice you smell 😳

when you tell him its you he doesn’t believe you!!! like stop u r trying too hard, stranger!!! 😠 It’s not until you bring up a photo of yourselves and stick it next to your face does he go all soft again like babe i missed you 🥺 there was this weirdo trying to flirt with me, i’m so glad you’re here 🥰 and you tell him that the weirdo was you and he’s like “no, you’re better than that” LMFAAOO THANKS HAJIME 😭

matsukawa his mom is there to pick the two of you up and he’s holding your hand as he turns to you, super concerned and goes “babe, we forgot my teeth 😞�� HWJJCKWJSJEF 💀 he’s all pouty and its sooooooo cute LMFAO WHAT DID HE THINK A REMOVAL WAS??? but you play it cool and squeeze his hand and say “i didnt forget you though 😊” he nods like a little kid and says “yeah” and tries to pull you into his lap so that you can cuddle but his mom is right there and you’re tryna be a good passenger and stop him from unbuckling your seatbelt: issei, we can cuddle when we get home!!!!

this giant dude just looks at you all 🥺 and BEGS like “babe please, just a little, i just want to hold you 🥺💕” he tries to guilt trip you like “c’mon, babe, you forgot my teeth” 😭😭😭 STFU u somehow make it back to his place and he tackles you into the couch and promptly falls asleep in 2 minutes flat 😴 his mom thinks its hilarious and thanks u for taking care of him ☺️❤️

hanamaki straight up asks you if you have a boyfriend. you say yes and he gets REALLY SAD OH MY GOD and is all “oh ☹️🥺” but then you cup his cheek and hold one of his hands and start telling him what your boyfriend looks like and how he has cute strawberry hair and pretty eyes and how handsome he is and talking about his cute little eyebrows and how good he is at volleyball and takahiro is like…. 🧐🤨 is that…… me??? but then he’s like wait it couldn’t be and gets all sad again 😭

you can’t take how sad he is and tell him it’s him!!!!! you give him some kisses as an apology 😭🥺💖❤️ and he’s all really?!!? 🥰💖💕💝🥳💕as he pulls you close to rest his head on your chest. he asks you to talk about how much you love him again 😭🥰🥺 refuses to remove himself from you

kyoutani he’s got this super angry expression on his face and everyone stays a good ways away from him 😬 when you come in, you get the same 😡 but then he chills because you’re wearing that one dress he went out of his way to buy for you when you were window shopping together that one time and he’s like …..suspicious why is she wearing her dress 😒 HAJFKAKSW KENTAROU

but THEN he sees the bracelet he got you for your one year anniversary and takes a whiff of you (um 😷) and NOW he’s all WAIT…… connections r being made—he gets super handsy 😳💕 really likes it when you kiss his forehead 🥺 and glares daggers at the dentist with his head on your chest, arms around your waist as you stand next to him and listen to what the aftercare instructions are because he’s all like grrr my girlfriend!! no touch!!! 😡🤬

daichi omg daichi is SO SHY and BASHFUL like he looks at you all 🥺🥰 and when you look towards him he immediately looks away but it’s so obvious because his ears are red and you can see his blush high on his cheekbones 😭🥺💕 you ask him what’s wrong and he’s stuttering trying to ask if you have a boyfriend and you’re like yes 💔

his face FALLS and it hurts but then you show him your matching engagement rings 💍 like “we’re fiancés, dai 🥰❤️” and he almost cries as hard as when he heard you say yes 😭💖💕 he’s so EMBARRASSED when you show the video back to him 😭 suga and asahi clown him 🤧

sugawara fella wakes up, looks you in the eye and is like “they’ve rebuilt me, babe✨” what? “the technology!!!” ??? “they made me better than i was before: better, stronger, faster 🤖💪🧠" LMFAO thinks he underwent some experiment like no we just fixed your teeth 😌

when you tell him so he gets a little dejected and asks you if you’d still love him without any upgrades with his lips pursed and his cheeks pink as he plays with your hands 🥺💗 like OFC KOUSHI!!! 🥰🥺❤️ really sweet and giggly on the bus ride home—holds you close and draws circles on your skin as he talks about the strangest things 🙈💖

kageyama no inhibitions so tobio is very attached to you!!! when he wakes up to see you next to him, he grabs you in his half-asleep state to leave slobbery kisses all over you like some dog before he falls back asleep again 💀 he wakes up twenty minutes later to see that you’re gone (had to wash off his spit 😬) and he panics when he doesn’t see you 😭🥺

he gets up to try to look for you and the second you come back, he hugs you and is all ☹️ telling you “don’t go too far, i wanna always be able to find you 😠🥺” you rub his back and pinky promise to stay close by and he’s so relieved he falls asleep standing 😴💕 like …..thanks 🤧 asks if he can play volleyball and pouts rlly hard when the dentist says no 😭💔

atsumu atsumu is loopy af and he wanted to go to the washroom so the poor staff had to hull around this 6’2”, 80kg man around but then you walk in just as they’re about to turn the corner and the moment he sees you, he’s goes “BABIEEEEE, I loOoove yoU! 😍” in this super adorable, high pitched sing-songy voice and makes OBNOXIOUS kissy faces at you but it looks so funny because his mouth is full of cotton 😭😭🤧🥴 the nurses tell you he’s a keeper but then he promptly slips and nearly falls on his face trying to walk over to you unassisted 🙄

the walk to the car is SO HARD because he clings to you like a baby koala and whines when you try to get him to loosen up so that you can get better leverage to support his weight like atsumu pls we’re almost there, just let go for a bit and he’s all puppy eyed like “don’t 🥺 ya 🥺 love 🥺 me 🥺 baby???????? i jus’ wanna be close to ya 💔💔💔” JAJCJJWNCMS he denies all of it when he sobers up

osamu all this fool remembers is that he has a girlfriend and that she looks EXACTLY like you but his brain synapses aren’t working like they used to 😔 so he doesn’t remember that YOU are literally his girlfriend so he just sits there and goes all “you look so much like her….. i miss her sm 😢🤕😞” with this faraway look in his eyes AS IF YOU WERE DEAD 💀 THE DISRESPECT

he rlly wants to hold your hand and touch you but like u aren’t his girlfriend right??? but you tell him u are after rolling ur eyes and show him some photos of the two of you as proof and he’s all “oh!” 😳 and he smiles so broad you can see his little dimple on his left cheek 😭💖 because he can FINALLY hold your hand 🥰 no filter so he whisper-begs for kisses throughout the entire time the dentist talks you through his surgery and how to care for him and you’re so embarrassed JAJCJKAKDSS “pls, pls can i have a kiss” you give him one “can i have one here now” “what about here” “pls another one pls” 🥺🥺🥺 at least he’s polite JAJCNKAFB

suna rin remembers you and right when he wakes up to see you next to him he says, “hello, wife 💖" and waits for your response but like wtf do u SAY like you’ve only ever heard him tell you he loves you that ONE time he thought u were ASLEEP!!! and you haven’t even talked about anything beyond dating yet!!! is it the anaesthetic that’s making him say this or is he just fooling you??? 💀😵 a few minutes later, he sighs and goes “you’re supposed to say ‘hello, husband ❤️’….” 🙄🥱

show him the video after the anaesthetic wears off and he’ll sit there looking at you like “….well? i’m still waiting? 😐” ugH modern romance am i right HAHDJKAKSKAA

ushijima wakatoshi thinks you’re another nurse even though you’re dressed nothing like them and he asks you when his girlfriend is coming and if she knows he’s done with the procedure and also “have you met my girlfriend? she is very beautiful and very kind. you must meet her ☺️” he asks the same questions to the dentist who comes in to talk to you afterwards and they’re looking at him like ?????? “isn’t this your girlfriend, ushijima-san?”

wakatoshi just goes 😯, looks at you and says your name so softly and in the sweetest way possible and tells you he missed you and he loves you and he wants to go get curry from that one restaurant later and the dentist tells you they’ll be back later as you sob 😭😭❤️💕❤️😭💖

semi eita thinks you’re one of the office receptionists when you walk in and asks you if you, his girlfriend 💕, had been notified that the procedure was done and you’re all uh yes she does, she’s coming soon!! he nods very cutely and thanks you, handsome smile on his face at the thought of seeing you 🥰 he turns around to look at the window and you just stand there all 😶 he HUMS softly as he waits and it’s that one song he played for you on his guitar HAJXNJSW 😭🥺💘❤️

he turns back around thirty seconds later like “babe?? is that you?? you got here so fast 😍🥺💖😚” as if it wasn’t you THE WHOLE TIME 💀 melts when you kiss his cheeks tenderly 🥰 plays with your fingers as he softly looks into your eyes!! 😍

tendou really wants to get his wisdom teeth back like just because you pulled them out doesn’t make them yours, sensei 🙄 LMFAO the dentist gives him his teeth afterwards and he holds them out for you and you’re like “tysm for your bloody, gross teeth, satori 🥰😬” “AWWW you’re welcome 😊 aren’t they cute? ya think our kids will be this cute? 💖”

many thoughts: 1) oh god oh GOD he wants to have KIDS WITH YOU!! MARRIAGE??!? 😵❤️ 2) y does he think his molars r cute and y does he hope your kids will look like nasty teeth 😭💀 he’s rlly adamant about you lazing around with him. keeps showing u his teeth for some reason but gives the cutest smiles and hums when you feed him his fav chocolate ice cream 💗💗💗

goshiki he tries to flirt with you but its so funny and endearingly awkward because he’s got all the gauze in his mouth and he isn’t that good at it and he’s on the verge of tears half the time and you dont know why??? you ask him and his brows are all furrowed, pout on his lips and says “just wanna be your boyfriend pls 🥺💕” “yeah?” “yeah,” he nods. “i promise to do my best 🥺”

when you tell him you’re already dating, he starts to cry and is all like i have to tell all my friends 😭 tsutomu cries to the dentist like “sensei, y’know, we’re boyfriend and girlfriend 😭❤️” he quiets down when you brush through his hair with your hands ☺️

terushima you walk into his room after he’s done and ask the dental hygienists how he’s doing and he looks at you all confused like 🤨 and asks the hygienists who you are. they think you’re married for some reason and say “that’s your wife!” and you’re so EMBARRASSED but also super happy on the inside HAHA he straight up goes “DAAAMMNNN, I did alright, huh?! when we bustin’ outta here?!” 🤪😜🥴😘 as if he could actually differentiate between left and right, up and down 😔

just in case, he asks you if you’re his wife at the same time the dentist asks if the two of you will be okay from here on out and you nod to the dentist’s question but yuuji thinks it’s for him so he lays back down with this satisfied look on his face like HELL YEAH alright, alright, alright 😌🥰🥴 and does those little nods SIDJAJJDJSJFJR HAHAHAHA

sakusa omi lets you play with his bangs and hands as you wait for the dentist and he LOVES IT softest smile on his face!! RIDICULOUSLY CLINGY!!!! he does NOT want you to leave him at all, will not let you go to the bathroom even though you’re like “omi, please, the dentist is busy with another patient right now, i’ll be back soon before we go through the aftercare stuff” “no” “omi, i have to pee” “do it here” and now it’s you who’s all 🤢

gets really defensive and protective when the dentist comes in and just shoves his head in your chest because he doesn’t want to look at them LMFAO death grip around your waist 🤧 when you show him what he said about you going to the bathroom he demands you delete it “omi, i didn’t know u loved me that much 🥰🥺💕” “…………..🤐”

hoshiumi kourai insisted he was fine on his own “nothing is impossible for hoshiumi kourai, national athlete 😤” when the dentist asked if he needed someone to watch over him and the dentist is 🤨 ok sir and leaves after he falls asleep. when he wakes up, no one’s in his room and he has to use the washroom and he’s like i’ll do just it myself 🙄 he tries to stand and promptly collapses to the floor. he CRAWLS around on his stomach and makes it out of his room just as you walk in and you’re like KOU whY are you on the FLOOR like a ROACH 😭😭😭

it’s like you’re reenacting some dramatic romance movie as kou groans around the gauze and makes poor attempts to stand up, holding onto you LAKDSHLASKAHD 💀💀💀 asks you to get on the floor with him because he honest to god can’t get UP so that he can cuddle with you as the dentist and his assistants stand two feet away 🥰💕 tries to fight the staff when they get too close to you trying to help him get back to his bed HAJJFKAKDMAD

extra: kita shinsuke (lol) when kita finishes his wisdom tooth extraction, he looks at you like this and doesnt remember who you are; he thinks you’re here for another patient and doesn’t say a word to you because his grandma taught him not to talk to strangers.

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sleeping-on-cracking-ice · 4 years ago

Note

can u do the sfw alphabet for nigari pls??

Sure! Hope you enjoy! 💕

SFW Alphabet | Suguru Niragi

{Alice In Borderland Masterlist}

Character: Suguru Niragi

Genre: dark

Warnings: strong toxic relationship themes, obsessive themes, blood, threatening, manipulation, gaslighting, physical & emotional abuse, a couple of suggestive themes, mention of body checking, mention of killing sprees

Author’s Note: I know I’ve mentioned this before, but just a reminder that I prefer to write Niragi as his true character. I would prefer not to pretend that he’s secretly a good man, because he’s not. Please do not read if you find any of the warnings upsetting or triggering! I don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable!

*this is based in the Borderlands

A - Affection

(How affectionate are they? How would they show affection?)

His love language is so hard to decide

I think he’s a mix of quality time and physical affection

There would be random times where he would just follow you around The Beach

He wouldn’t necessarily even talk to you, just trail you like a shadow

You would be well aware he’s there, he’s not that good at keeping quiet since he’s such a heavy-foot

But you never tell him that, and just give him the satisfaction of believing he’s being sneaky

He would give you random pecks on the cheek when walking past you in the halls

There has been times when you would be talking to someone and he would just run up and pick you up from behind and run off while laughing

B - Best Friend

(What would they be like as a best friend?)

He’d be the most annoying piece of shit

You’d never get alone time, he would always just pop out of the most random places just to annoy you

He wouldn’t want a best friend that couldn’t take his harsh jokes

Everyone at The Beach would be terrified of you two

You’re like the most dangerous duo, no one would want to be put with you two for a game, it’s a guaranteed lose

C - Cuddles

(Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

He would have a weird obsession for cuddling you

Would NEVER do it in front of anyone else though

He’d demand your cuddles, like he would get angry if you refused

Sometimes would just randomly grab you from your friends and drag you to his room so he can lay his head on your lap

“Play with my hair,” “Niragi, I wasn’t finishe-” “Shut up and just do it.”

Would fall asleep just from you braiding his hair

Don’t move though, if he wakes up he’ll accuse you of trying to leave

D - Domestic

(Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

He kind of pushed you into moving into his room with him

He said it’s better because it’s bigger due to his higher wristband number

Would start to believe that you’re kind of becoming more close from moving into his room

But, he’s so bad at maintenance

His job is security, so he doesn’t know how to work in a kitchen or let alone clean

You’d have to clean the room and wash the laundry yourself

Sometimes Niragi would feel a bit guilty and try and help, but would fail miserably and become too embarrassed to even keep assisting

E - Ending

(If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Brutally

No remorse whatsoever from this man

If he broke up with you, he would tell you in the meanest way possible, probably through public humiliation

If you broke up with him though, oh no hun

He’d at first just not let you break up with him and give you a warning

But if you didn’t listen to his warning, all hell would break loose

I’m talking about pouring buckets of blood through your windows, shooting bullet holes through your door with his rifle in the middle of the night, threatening to kill those close to you

You wouldn’t be able to take it, eventually just going back to him just to make him stop

{Here’s a short headcanon elaborating on this further}

F - Fiancé(e)

(How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Getting married in the Borderlands is impossible, but Niragi would always look towards the future with you

He would’ve dreamt about going back to the real world and finally being able to marry you

Sometimes he thinks maybe you could run away from The Beach with him and get married by yourselves

But yeah, he would be quick with moving forward and be committed completely to your relationship

G - Gentle

(How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

You already know what I’m going to say

He would never be gentle, it’s not in his personality at all

Physically, he wouldn’t be fragile with you

He’d rough you up a lot, grabbing your wrists or pulling you harshly by your shirt

But when you approach him about it, he would gaslight you into believing that you made him do it and that he has to control you to keep you safe

Emotionally, no

Doesn’t hold any regard for your feelings, says whatever the hell he wants to say

Don’t even think about opening your emotions to him, he would shut them down so quickly by belittling you

“Aww my wittle bunny feewing sad? Deal with it, I’m not a therapist.”

H - Hugs

(Do they like hugs? How often would they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Very sudden and tight hugs

Always gives you a jump scare by sprinting up behind you and throwing his arms around your waist

He would hug you as often as he could

He doesn’t care if you refuse his hugs when it’s just the two of you

But when you refuse in front of people, he gets embarrassed and makes a mental note to teach you a small lesson later

I can imagine him having quite warm skin, so sometimes you would push yourself into his arms if the breeze was making you cold

I - I Love You

(How fast do they say the L-word?)

Would say it as a joke, before you guys were even together

Probably to tease you, or take you by shock

Or maybe that was him being genuinely honest

In the relationship, he would say it when you’re mad at him, because he can’t take you seriously when you’re mad

“Niragi can you cut that out!?” “NOoooo I love you~”

J - Jealousy

(How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Ohhhh no, they can’t get any worse than this man

His jealousy would be out of control

You can’t even smile at anyone else in his presence

If you did, he would grab your jaw and make you look at him again

One time a new member of The Beach thought that they could try and kiss you, not knowing that you were the infamous Niragi’s S/O

Let’s just say that no one saw them after that incident

He also once backed a man against a wall with his sniper rifle to his head for staring at your ass for a bit too long

Don’t make this man jealous, it never ends well

K - Kisses

(What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

He would use so much tongue it would be suffocating

And he would hold your head in his hands roughly so you couldn’t pull away

When it’s just you two by yourself, there wouldn’t be a moment where his lips were off you

Is obsessed with kissing your neck, could never get enough of it

Would absolutely love it if you kissed around his ears, like he would melt

When in out at the pool or in the lobby with everyone else, he would actually prefer to not kiss at all

He would feel weird if people stared, cause you were his and his only and he didn’t want other people looking at you

L - Little Ones

(How are they around children?)

He would hate kids

He wouldn’t carry a shred of love for them

Most kids would be terrified of him anyway

Kids (if there is any at The Beach) would approach him because they thought his piercings or gun was cool, but he would say some freaky shit that would scare them off

I mean most people would tell kids to stay away from him anyway

But he would have this weird love for watching you play and look after kids

He didn’t know what it was, but it always made him fall deeper in love to see you playing immature games just to keep the children happy and smiling

M - Morning

(How are mornings spent with them?)

You would always wake up before Niragi

Don’t try and leave the bed though because otherwise he would instantly wake and drag you back into his arms and hold you ten times tighter like a cage

Most mornings would be you laying in bed contemplating what to do for the day while waiting for Niragi to wake up

When he does eventually, he would instantly want cuddles and kisses

You don’t get a choice in it of course

Waking up would be a slow process, but you would get there eventually

N - Night

(How are nights spent with them?)

Niragi always works around The Beach until late, so he would probably tell you to go back to the room around 11pm

You would spend the time reading or sitting out on the balcony and watching the stars

Niragi would come back and walk out to the balcony to find you

He would wrap his hands around your waist and push his face into your neck, nipping at your skin

“Are you coming to sleep or what?”

O - Open

(When would they start revealing things about themselves?)

This man would have walls upon walls upon walls

He’s never opened up to someone before and he wasn’t going to start just because he had a partner

He spent years building his personality so he could protect himself from others, why would he suddenly tear it down?

He wouldn’t, the furthest you could ever probably get with him is during a screaming match between you two, he said something in the heat of the moment about his shitty childhood

You would freeze and not say anything as he storms out

But other than that, you were never getting anything out of him

P - Patience

(How easily angered are they?)

I actually don’t think he’d be that easily angered

You could do anything, scream at him, punch him, insult him but he would always keep that cocky smirk on his face

But if you were to publicly humiliate him, that would be another story

If you try to show dominance over him in front of his militant group or other members of The Beach, he wouldn’t hesitate to slap you in front of everyone

He always wanted to be conveyed as the top of the food chain at The Beach, so if you came anywhere near to damaging that reputation, he’d make sure you were put in your place

Q - Quizzes

(How much would they remember about you?)

Every little thing

He’d know you better than you know yourself

It would honestly become frustrating though, because he would know when you’re lying or when you’re hiding something just from your body language alone

I feel like he would ask the chefs who made food at The Beach to always make your favourite dish that reminded you of home

It would probably be the only actual human decency Niragi would show to you

R - Remember

(What is their favourite moment in your relationship?)

His favourite memory of your relationship would be when you brought back a gift for him after your game

You walked past a cute trinket shop on the way back and saw a small glass raven in the window

You thought Niragi would like it because one of his favourite animals is a raven

He would be over the moon excited, but would try to play it off like it’s nothing

He’d keep it on his bedside table and clean it everyday so it stays shiny

S - Security

(How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

He’d never let you out of his sight

He’s incredibly controlling, so he wouldn’t let you have a say in most things

He would always have you by his side, arm around your should tucking you into his chest

No one would even approach you when you’re with him because they’d be too scared he’d get the wrong idea

One time he threw someone over the bar counter and into the glass alcohol bottles because they thought they could try and lure you into their room

He’d be very much over dramatic, almost killing anyone who tried to hurt or flirt with you

At games, he would not let go of your hand

He wouldn’t let you do anything, he would drag you around and kill anyone he sees

Being with him would be a guaranteed win every time, but he sure would make you feel awful about it

T - Try

(How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

He wouldn’t put that much effort at all I think

He’d see all that petty romance stuff as insignificant and a bit stupid

Wouldn’t bother remembering anniversaries, I mean there wouldn’t be much of a point while being stuck in the Borderlands

He has the mindset that you should devote yourself to one another without the need of gifts or dates

The closest you would ever come to getting a date with him is those nights you would spend together on the roof to look at the stars

But even then he would complain about it, because you would have to end up dragging him up there yourself since he doesn’t let you go anywhere without him

U - Ugly

(What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

You already know

Too many to count

He’s violent, he’s aggressive, he’s overprotective, he’s obsessive, he’s abusive, he’s unforgiving, he’s stubborn, he’s unempathetic, he’s psychotic

The list could go on forever

It would always make you question why you ever got involved with him in the first place, even if he didn’t give you much of a choice

Probably the only good thing you would get from him is constant attention and guaranteed protection from anything that could potentially harm you

Being with the scariest man on The Beach would have few pros, but they would still be useful at times

V - Vanity

(How concerned are they with their looks?)

I actually think he’s really concerned about his physical appearance

He probably pierced his own eyebrow, nose and tongue while he was in the Borderlands to appear more threatening

In the mornings, he would take forever to get ready

Probably does body checks in random reflections throughout the day

Yeah idk, I just think based off his personality, he would try so hard to come across as intimidating to keep his insecurities away

Sometimes he would tell you to tell him your favourite things about him just to reassure himself

He wouldn’t even care if you were lying, just hearing it would make him feel somewhat less insecure

W - Whole

(Would they feel incomplete without you?)

He would go clinically insane if he lost you somehow

He’s obsessed with you, why wouldn’t he?

If you didn’t return from a game or if you randomly disappeared, a few people were definitely become a victim of his rage

Would go on a killing spree, blinded by his anger and sadness

Would probably regret it and just sob loudly in your shared room for a bit, hugging your clothes to his chest

He would go searching for you everyday, wouldn’t even keep track of his visa

He had to find you, otherwise he would lose himself further than he already had

X - Xtra

(A random headcanon for them)

I feel like you would be the only person who would be allowed to touch his sniper rifle (I hope that’s what his gun’s called)

I mean obviously not to use against him, but he would give it to you if he ever had to be separate from you during a game for some reason

He would take you out to shooting practice, just aiming at crows or tree branches to help you get the hang of it

Sometimes the shot would be so forceful you would fly backwards onto your back

Niragi would always laugh hysterically at you when that happens

He would never let you use it at The Beach without his supervision though, he’d be so scared you would injure yourself

Y - Yuck

(What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

He would hate a partner with a huge personality

Would very much prefer someone who was more quiet and timid, because they would be easier to control

And he just loves the thought of looking after and protecting someone, even though he’d be really bad at making you feel safe around him

He wouldn’t like someone who acted independent and didn’t need him

He’s insecure so he would need that reassurance that someone wants him

In general wise, I think he would hate sleeping

Somehow he just manages to run off 2 hours sleep everyday

He would get tired but he would just despise sleeping for some reason

It might be nightmares of insomnia, but he never really would bring it up so you wouldn’t ask

Z - Zzz

(What is a sleep habit of theirs?)

He has to be hugging something

He cannot sleep without having both arms and both legs wrapped around you

If you were being stubborn, he would just squeeze you tighter

You’d still be in the same position in the morning

Doesn’t care if you’re overheating, he if wants you close then he’ll make sure you are

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mouthfulloftoothpasterry · 3 years ago

Note

HELLO i’m back and i’m bringing some more concepts (sorry in advance if i repeat some btw 😭)

- ok so like imagine if yall went to a concert and like he would be DANCING SO HARD and u would basically whisper-shout bc it’s loud (lol) what the artist/band is doing on stage to him… he would be so grateful for that ????

- omg also can we PLS imagine him as a dad to be trying his veryyyy best to build a crib and like help decorate the room??? trips to ikea!!! and harry feeling material on blankets to see which is best for his bubba!

- speaking to dad to be harry… HIM AT A ULTRASOUND appointment!!!! y/n would count all the babies toes for him!!!!!!! and he would so sob when he finds out the gender 🥰 and would be holding ur hand so hand bc he’s so lucky ????

- ok wait this is a but random but i can imagine him being a best man one day for like his best friends wedding and you would whisper in his ear that he looked beautiful ( him with his suit and colourful tie HE picked out 🥲) and he would blush like crazy… also would defo dance with you all dance night… conga? yeah. chicken dance thing? he’s doing that for an hour straight… and hearing ur laugh?? hes DEAD.

- alsooooo night routines would be so cuteee!! he can hear you taking ur makeup off and would go to the counter of ur bathroom and sleepily ask if you could do his moisturiser or something… or he would sit on the counter and wait for you, ask abt ur day, would get some snacks for ur night movie or something. but random but hey ho!

- small dates are a must btw!!! walk on the pier? yup! just harry feeling the wind on this face makes him so happy! and he doesn’t feel self conscious around you or anything… and if someone gave him a funny look you would be SO close to punching them in the damnnn face!! he’s very lucky to have u lol

sorry if these are bad! it’s evening in the uk so i’m tired lol. watch me come back tomorrow 💞 have a lovely day and hope u like these lol!!!!!! xxx

NO THESE ARE SO GOOD OH MY GOD

I NEED TO TAKE A WHILE TO RESPOND TO ALL OF THEM AND WRITE A GOOD CHUNK FOR ALL OF THEM SO I WILL EDIT THIS LATER AND TAG YOU ONCE I RESPOND TO IT ALLLLL!!!! 🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍 THANK YOU SO MUCH 🥺

Okay they are done babyyyy @sunflowerstyles-6

Concert:

“oh my god, Harry he just fell!” Y/n giggles, watching the concert they caught at last minute. They didn’t even really know the band but they have heard a few songs and the band wasn’t very well known so pit tickets were pretty cheap. “What?!” Harry asks, stilling his dance moves and snapping his head toward his girlfriend. Y/n laughs loudly, “He almost fell off of the stage!” Y/n giggles, clinging to Harry. “Is he okay?!”

y/n nods, kissing harrys cheek. “Keep on dancing, baby! I want to get some videos of you!” Y/n yells over the music, pulling away from his and stepping back to take videos of his crazy head banging and jumping.

Building a crib:

“Honey, it’s okay. I can get someone else to build it.” Y/n says, rubbing her eight month bump while standing in the nursery that belongs to their second baby. “Hush, lovie. I’ve got this. Just let me take my time.” He says, growing frustrated with his pregnant wife but he still kept a smile on his face while talking to her.

“Okayyy, I’m going to watch ******. Yell for me if you need us.” She says, letting her man do what he needed to do.

Soon enough Harry yells her name, Y/n was selling up the stairs with their first born. She smiles while she leans against the door frame, breathless from hauling her big belly up the stairs. “You did it, baby.” She smiles, patting his cheek. “So proud of you.”

Yeah… you guys don’t get to know the name until a blurb comes out 😎 me also using they/ them pronouns so you don’t know the gender yet HAHAHAH

Ultrasound:

“Bubby, stay on my lap.” Harry whispers to his baby, hugging them while their mummy gets an ultrasound. “Okay… one second and I’ll be able to tell you the sex!” The woman standing in pink scrubs smiles, rubbing the wand over Y/n’s swollen belly.

“Okay, you’ve got a (YOU WISH YOU KNEW HAHAHAHA) in your belly!” The kind lady announces with a warm, excited smile on her face. Y/n jaw drop while Harry and ****** squeal. “ANOTHER?” Y/n cries, making Harry giggle. “Hush, you are gonna love it, baby.”

Best man:

“Don’t be nervous, silly.” Y/n giggles to her fiancé while she fixes his bow tie. They were at Harry’s best friends wedding. Mitch and Sarah had gotten engaged just a couple months before Harry and Y/n had, Harry now being his best man and Mitch going to their wedding as harrys best man.

“Hush it! I’ve got to walk in-front of all of those people.” Harry whisper yells, pointing to the door where people are slowly trickling in behind.

“Baby.” Y/n says, grabbing his face and looking straight into his eyes- he can instantly senses the eye contact and it makes his cheeks burn. “You look fucking beautiful. You are a dream. After the ceremony is over we are gonna go dance out asses off, and have the time of our lives. You aren’t Gonna have a worry in your mind so don’t get worked up now.” She says, hushing him with a firm kiss to his lips before he can even speak. “Thank you,” he cups her jaw. “I needed that.”

Soon enough Harry is screaming at the top of his lungs while doing the cha-cha slide- his suit jacket slipped off and shirt almost completely unbuttoned.

Night routine:

“Are y’ taking off your makeup, beautiful?” Harry asks from the bed, his voice tired and croaky. Y/n nods from the sink in the bathroom- “yup!” Harry groans, rubbing over his face. “Come take mine off, beauty.”

Y/n laughs at her husband, rolling her eyes while she pats her face dry with a towel. “Baby, you don’t wear makeup!” She yells back, stepping into the door way between their bathroom and bedroom. “Yeah but… come make me pretty. Wanna talk to you.” Y/n rolls her eyes but grabs a sheet mask and other things to doll up her husband nonetheless.

“You don’t need this, you’re pretty enough.” She says, swinging a leg over him and straddling his hips while he relaxes his head down into his pillow while she slides the slimy mask onto his face. “Yeah, yeah. How was your day?”

“It was fine, ****** was a little crazy today, but they went down so good for me during nap time.” Y/n hums. Harry smiles, “good.”

“How the company going?” Y/n giggles on-top of her husband, watching him lips form back into a smile. “It was good, sales are still going up!”

“Was it a good day?”

“Never when I’m away from you.”

Small date- at the fair!:

“No, H, come on! Give me a pretty face.” Y/n giggles, trying to take a Polaroid of him while he makes silly faces, pulling at his cheeks and lips to make himself look crazy. “Okay, okay, I swear. This one I will smile.” Harry makes a pretty face, closing his eyes while he smiles, pulling up his shoulders shyly while he does it. “Awe, you are so pretty.” Y/n coos at her fiancé,. Pulling up the camera to her eye.

As soon as the photo is shot harry is switching poses and shoving his corn dog into his mouth like a mad man. “Damn it Harry!” Y/n yells at her fiancé, making her erupt into giggles, almost making himself fall on the ground.

OKAYYY THATS ALL I HAVE :)

I realized that I spoiled that part about Harry eventually starting his own company… at least you don’t know what the company is 😭

#ask #blind!harry #blind!harry concept #my love 😩

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