#please someone i need a friend to cry with
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if you could read this, it would genuinely mean the world to me.
For the comrades who originally reblogged and contributed to Maha’s last fundraiser, and wondered why their donations were returned… the piece of shit who originally hosted her GFM left her in the dirt, disappeared for months. And despite her contacting GFM to prove she’s the beneficiary, it wasn’t successful. Since that person never listed Maha as a beneficiary AND didn’t put their own legal name in the GFM. She never got the 4k USD raised.
Maha, my dear friend is a trans woman in Iraq. Life being extremely dangerous is an understatement, and she’s reached a breaking point of pretending to be someone she hates… she worked 3 jobs to save money to get out, but her savings were destroyed due to developing cancer because of American bombs…
I only want the best for her.
She’s seeking asylum in Canada, but it’s looking bad as the party coming into power in May after election is mostly likely the extremely anti-immigrant one. She sees no way out but she’s still trying to hang on.
Iraq is going to get bombed again this month. Yesterday she had to hang up in middle of the call because she could hear planes over her head..
There’s a lot more I can say but I��m trying to keep this brief, and be as vulnerable as I can.
I’m horrified to imagine a life without her, we’ve been friends for over a year. She finds the best Minecraft lets plays and random video essays on conspiracy theories and history for hang outs-- and every single time she can’t cope anymore and calls me out of despair and then hang up for hours to cry on her own, I worry so so much that this is the last time I will ever hear from her…
Tysm for reading. 💗 please help out in whatever capacity you can, she needs all the support she can get. And lastly, please hang on.
Please help an Iraqi trans woman seek asylum! She is a friend of one of my good friends and I've spoken to her before. Her situation has been very difficult and it has not been easy for her to make this choice to ask for help. Chip in what you are able, she's a great comrade and I really want her to get to safety.
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“Wait, you succeeded in catching another big baby again?” one guy said to the other, as they both entered the living room.
“Yes. Please keep your voice down, he’s having his nap,” the other said, lowering his voice as he talked, ��Now sit”.
Both sat on the couches in front of the diapered grown man. He looked so peaceful, sucking on a giant pacifier, wearing a cozy dino onesie.
“He looks familiar. Isn’t it the guy we all met at the bar about a month ago?” the surprised man said. “Yes, this is him.” said the man. “And in a month you turned him into your baby?”
“Is it slow or fast?” the man said and laughed.
The baby was so calm, that his bladder released, making his crouch warm and soothing.
“It’s fast! Did he roll with it or resisted?” The guy asked. “First of all, no real man would agree to wear a baby-printed diaper and suck on a paci. Even after a month, he could probably take it off by himself, but he wouldn’t. Do you want to know why?” the man asked, wanting to be questioned.
“Why?”
“Because he met mister wooden paddle over my knees. What started as an erotic game for him, turned into my wantings. I wanted a baby, and Mister Paddle made it happen. After a few swats, he dribbled all over my knees, making my wantings into his new reality. He needed diapers. I told him ‘Would a real man pee all over someone’s knees while crying?’ “ the man said and nodded.
The big baby woke up moments before but stayed quiet and motionless. He wanted to listen.
“And now my boy knows I was right. Look at him, look how docile he is, how in peace. When he’ll wake up, you will see him playing under his play gym like the real baby that he is.”
Your Daddy was right. You remember Mister Paddle, you remember how much it was difficult to learn your true place. But now you know, you know your place is next to Daddy’s feet and even his friends. You find comfort in diapers and baby stuff, you can relax and be your true self.
Your diaper felt so good, you pressed the front into the matt, and the sensation was incredible. You kept on going, back and forth, slowly, thinking it was unnoticeable while keeping your eyes closed, still listening to the talking men. Unconsciously, making small baby grants.
“I think your baby woke up,” the guy said.
“Shhhh, if he keeps his eyes closed, he thinks we won’t see him. By the sound he’s making, I already know he enjoys his little pecker in his diaper. Let him have it, he’ll squirt into his padding then I’ll change him.” said Daddy, knowing his new son already.
---------------------------------
Did it take @alittlerobotkid a month to turn into a baby, or was he always one?
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Pookie! I need you to write me something pretty please :)
Can you write Remus comforting a reader with an anxiety disorder when someone told them "there's nothing to be anxious about. You just want attention" ??? Pretty please?? Love you pookieeeeeee
Thanks for requesting!
cw: mean girl stuff, social anxiety
Remus Lupin x fem!reader ♡ 929 words
“Shh.” Remus holds you close to his chest, his hand moving up and down your arm now that your crying has slowed. “It’s okay. It’s just us, yeah?”
“Yeah,” you echo, croakily. You’re glad you can’t see your boyfriend’s face, for fear you’d die of embarrassment otherwise. The looming insecurity of your day stands over you like a grim reaper.
You arrived home from a friend’s birthday dinner to find Remus sitting on the couch, already marking the page of his book as he turned to you with a soft smile.
“Hi, sweetheart. How was it?”
You replied, through a laugh that turned into a sob halfway through, “Not great.”
The dinner had been an event of foreboding for you since your invite. You’d been determined to be a good friend by not bailing, but actually going had confirmed your worst fears; it was loud, crowded, filled with people you didn’t know and didn’t fit with. Your outfit wasn’t right, the menu was daunting, and conversation swirled all around you about things you weren’t a part of. The fallout was basically inevitable.
You perhaps waited too long to excuse yourself. You were sweating buckets and breathing around a lump by the time you did, whispering an explanation to your friend before locking yourself into a bathroom stall to talk yourself down. You’re sure she didn’t mean anything by telling the people sitting closest to her why you were gone—you don’t think she’d do it to gossip, and she’s never talked down to you about that sort of thing, at least not to your face—but by the time you returned one of her friends—a stranger to you, who’s name you can’t even remember—had formulated a fairly decisive opinion and dubbed you an attention seeker.
You stayed only a little longer after that. Just long enough to avoid attracting more attention. And you worked yourself up well enough on the way home that all it took was one innocent question from Remus to send you crumpling into his arms.
You’ve tried to steel yourself more than once, but any attempts at stoicism have been foiled by your boyfriend’s tender looks and whispered placations, which only make you cry harder. If you’re an attention seeker, Remus is your holy grail. Self loathing sits lodged in your throat like a stone.
“Whose friend was it, again?” Remus asks, stroking your arm gently.
You take a breath, trying to steady your voice. “Does it matter?”
“I don’t mean it’s your friend’s fault, sweetheart,” Remus says. He’s all softness and patience, better than you could ever deserve. “I just thought you might talk to her, if you want to. She ought to know her friend is going around saying cruel things.”
“She was there.” Your throat tightens at the memory.
“Oh. Then I don’t suppose you need to say anything; I’m sure she’s already very upset for you.”
You try to laugh, frustrated with yourself when it only seems to spur another wave of tears. “Rem. You’re biased.”
“What?” Remus sounds genuinely surprised. “You don’t think she’s angry with that other girl?”
“She’s her friend.”
“So are you.” His arms tighten around you protectively, chin bumping your head. “I may be biased, but the other girl was clearly in the wrong. There’s no excuse for the way she acted.”
A dozen rebuttals fly about your head, but you keep your mouth shut. You don’t have the energy to argue. Unfortunately, Remus hears your argument in the silence anyway.
“Sweetheart,” he says softly, “no one puts themselves through what you do for attention. You don’t choose to feel that way.”
You hunch your back, tucking your head underneath his chin. “I do get attention for it, though.”
“That doesn’t mean you want it.”
“But I—”
“Do you want it?” You can’t see Remus, but you hear the hardened edge to his tone. “Did you like it, when that girl called attention to you in the middle of the dinner?”
Your voice smalls. “No.”
“Right.” The gentleness returns. Remus puts his lips to your head. “I know you didn’t, dovey. So don’t torment yourself, please. She doesn’t know anything about you.”
You push your lips together. He lets you chew on your next words for a while, his thumb swiping softly back and forth over your upper arm, the sleeve of your top shifting slightly with the motion.
“What if…” You gnaw the inside of your cheek. Remus waits. “What if everyone thinks that?”
“Mm. Well, for what it’s worth, I don’t think most people would. Surely not anyone who knows you, or anyone worth being around.” He takes a breath, thinking. “You can’t always control what people think. I know you say I’m biased, but anyone who thinks something like that really isn’t worth thinking about at all. You’ve got enough going through that head of yours, yeah?” He kisses your hair fondly.
“I guess so,” you admit.
“Yeah,” Remus decides. He pulls away to see your face, pushing hair away from your tacky cheeks. “I’d say so.”
You wonder if you look as horrendously in love as you feel. You think you must, because your boyfriend’s expression softens impossibly further as he turns his head to give you a proper kiss. You feel raw but comforted, and suddenly, totally exhausted.
“Let the bullies worry about themselves.” Remus gives you a tender look. “I’ll worry about you.”
You let a small smile tilt your lips. “And what am I left to worry about?”
“Nothing,” he says solemnly. “Think you can manage that?”
“Nope.”
“Mm. Well, try.”
#remus lupin#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin x fem!reader#remus lupin x you#remus lupin x y/n#remus lupin x self insert#remus lupin fanfiction#remus lupin fanfic#remus lupin fic#remus lupin hurt/comfort#remus lupin fluff#remus lupin imagine#remus lupin scenario#remus lupin drabble#remus lupin blurb#remus lupin one shot#remus lupin oneshot#marauders#marauders fanfiction#marauders fandom#the marauders#hp marauders#marauders era#marauders x reader
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i hope this isn't too weird but im really feeling like I need an older queer to tell me straight up: am I going to be ok? im a queer teen in the u.s. and with *gestures vaguely* all this...is it gonna be ok? are me and my queer friends gonna be ok?
I wish I could tell you for sure that you're gonna be okay. I can't guarantee that. I can't guarantee that for anybody. It's gonna get scary. Some of your friends are not gonna be okay. You might not be okay from time to time, or for a while. I don't know. I know that it's gonna be hard. There will be beauty in there to be found, and you're gonna need to get good at finding it, and you will if that's part of what you focus on.
One of the things that my family tries to do as a matter of course is to look for reasons to say shehechyanu. If you're not familiar, it's a bracha/prayer that Jews say every time they do something for the first time each Jewish year. So the first time you light the Shabbat candles, the first time you cross the border into another state, the first time you sit down for lunch with a particular friend, whatever it is. This is true of negative experiences, of course, and I find myself saying shehechyanu when I'm ... I dunno, at the ER for the first time each year, too, because the poem translates to:
Blessed are You, Adonai our God, Sovereign of the world, who has kept us alive, sustained us, and brought us to this season.
So whatever I'm going through, I am trusting that I've been sustained to this point for a reason, and that I'll be sustained to the next thing for a reason, too. But it's not a passive thing -- it's not like, 'well, it's all in HaShem's hands, He'll make that choice.' By saying shehechyanu, I'm choosing to sustain myself. I'm choosing to say that I got here and I'll get to the next thing, too. Me and my people, we got here, and we'll get to the next thing, too.
You're gonna have to find your way to do that, and I trust that you will. I trust that you're up to the challenge of what these years are gonna be, because you reached out when you were afraid, and you asked someone for help. I'm sorry it took me a while to answer this, but like. You've got the instincts and the skills to get through this, starting with "I asked for someone to help me."
Asking for help from each other is the first thing an infant does: we cry. We say, I'm scared, this is new and terrifying, please help me. So find the people you can help, and the people you can ask for help. That's how we get through.
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{ All For Us Part II } Part I
Hello and Welcome to the part Two of All for Us ! I'm so happy this little story seem to please people. I still don't really know How to describe in the good way what this story will be, but so far I thing something like ; Toxic relation and healing process are good terms for it.
I hope you will enjoy this part as much as you enjoyed the firts part. My only negativ recap from this part is ; Im sorry for the ending I feel like I rushed it and also sorry for the lac of word or expression. If someone want to help me or correct something or even help me rewrith some parts hit me Up. I will not say No if it can make it better.
TW : Mention of drug, smut without Smut ( Started but never ended) Toxic relation, cheating
Tags : @private-vampire @rafesbunniebby
When you came back in the main Room, you return to the bed you awaken and sit on it. Your arms was wrapped around your legs as you try to breath to not start to cry. You wasn’t sure if all you felt was cause of the pregnancy, the stress or just cause you stopped abruptly to take drugs some months ago. Your mind was set to not take it but your body just want to feel high again. Also you would not be again’t not feeling stress Right Now.
You spotted Thano’s purple hair in the crowd as he mad his way to you with another guy before sitting in your bed, in front of you. He’s eyes was locked on you as you try to look like nothing matter, but your wet eyes and slightly trembling body betrayed You.
«-You didn’t seem to feel Alright, flower. »
He gave a Look at his friend, asking him to leave us alone for a moment. When He left, Thanos got closer to you. If you felt better you would have kicked his ass far from you, but you hardly have energy ton control the hurricane of emotions in your body right now.
Thanos put his arms around your shoulders before whispering something in your ear.
«-Maybe you need one of my special treats, for energy. I bring t some with me. -Scram, looser.»
Your voice was low, but the tone was hatfull. Thanos simply turn his head to look at you and raised an eybrow. He knew something was wrong.
«-Y/N … i’m serious. You didn’t seem fine. We already talked about that. If you want to quit drugs you can’t just do it like this. Your body will still crave it and if you refuse him his usual treat, he will make you go feral.»
A small sarcastic smile appear on your face. You Eyes was locked on what happen in the crowd in front of you, ignoring what the other talked about.
«-You mean, like you did ? No. I will not be like you.»
Thanos sight and let go of you to place himself again in front of you to have eyes contact with you.
«-I know i wasn’t the best boyfriend. I know I fucked up, but I swear I didn’t cheated on you. So please, let me help you.»
He get out the cross to his necklace and opened it, After taking care no one was looking at you, and took one little pill and put it your hand. You looked at the small thing with a lot of hesitation. He gave this to you, for free. You could just swallow it and let the anxiety fly away, but it will be an horrible mistake. This could be the death of your child and the win your body crave for. Also a Win for Thanos who think giving you drug is the real and also the best way to help you.
You closed your eyes, took a deep breath as your hand was place one your belly like you tried to protect your child.
«-I can’t.
Your voice was shaky, just like you refuse to take the pill to gave you good conscience but it was just really hard to say no when all you need is that small little thing to make you feel better.
-Excuse-me, what ? What do you mean you can’t ? »
Thanos seems really surprised to ear you say no to this. That was one of your favorite drug before.
Giving him back his pill you opened your eyes and answered with more confidence.
«-I can’t. I don’t want to touch that shit ever again.»
The rapper looked at the pill in your hand and took it back, unsure and still surprised. He was about to say something but was cut by the crowd asking to leave, to do a vote. The guard agreed but first, they showed you and the rest of the alive competitors the amount of money you had collected after one game. If you all take the decision to leave, you will end up with more money than when you arrived but it wasn’t enough to pay your debts, but was it worth risking your life ?
The vote started with player 456 who voted to go back home. You will pass in the last ones, it give you time to think about what you're gonna do.
You weren't surprised to see Thanos vote to stay.
When it was finally your turn, get up of your bed and walk to the machine, looking at the two buttons and the numbers of vote. It was 50/50
As much as you wish to go home, stay alive and never have to see Thano’s face ever again, the money you will receive from all the people who died in the first game, to had put your life in danger, it wasn’t enough. Not enough to clear you debts or to raise a child. Plus, here you will not find a way to put your hand on drug again. At least if you could leave with a little more money to go in detox, it will be the best. That’s why you choose to stay.
You felt sorry for everyone who wanted to go home, you will maybe choose to leave after the next game.
Before going to bed, you had to go to the bathroom. You didn’t felt so good, all the stress, the blood, the weird smell everywhere gave you nausea and you could hold in anymore. You took the first cabinet and throw up. You wasn’t sure if it was just the pregnancy but for once you had doubts about it, it just didn’t help.
«-I’m sorry… I’m sorry to put you in all this danger. To make you feel all those harsh emotions…»
Still throwing up, you felt tears on your face. You could hold in anything anymore. Everything was too much for a day.
«-One more game… and we are going home. I swear. »
You cried out as you flush the toilet. You let all your negative emotion out until you heard someone knock at your cabin door.
«-I’m sorry, I overheard you and I felt worried. Are you alright there ? -Yeah, wonderful, you answered with a lot of sarcasm, best day of my life.»
You sniffled and whipped your tears before get up of your feets and leaving the cabin. You found yourself face to face with another young girl with the number 222 or her hoodie. She looked at you with some concern. On the other part of her top, you could see a X. She voted to go home and cause of your vote, you denied her that fate. You felt like it was the best decision to stay, but you also felt so much guilt.
«-You talked alone ? She asked you.-Yeah, exactly. »
You are not here to make friends and you dont know her. You will not start to explain all your worries to a perfect stranger.
«-Can I ask you something ? She asked as you made your way to the sink -You already did but yeah sure. -Why did you choose to Stay ? -Why did you choose to leave ?»
You saw her in the mirror, putting her hand on her belly while she looked at it with a worried look in her eyes.
«-Because I’m pregnant.»
Now you felt more guilty. You was in the same boat in this situation. What a Hellhole, two pregnants womens for one game. As you watch the water flow in your hands, you sigh heavily and close it, still looking at the sink.
«-So Am I. That’s why I chose to stay for at least one other game. I need this money to clear debts and at least go to therapy before I give birth. I don’t want my child to leave like I used to the last two years.»
You opened up so easily and mentally cursed yourself, you knew you shouldn't but you felt better now. Maybe Life put her on your way to show you that you are not alone.
«-How many months ? She asked.-I don’t really Know, for around 2 months. I realized it after I left my boyfriend, almost two months ago.»
She slowly get closer to You as you turn around to face her. You noticed her belly, it was bigger than yours, but with the baggy clothes it’s easy to hide. You should be able to hide it from Thanos without any problems. Your bum his only visible when your remove your cloths or show that part of your body, witch mean ; Never.
«-Why are you here ? You asked Her. -I need money to raise the kid on my own and the father put me in debt. I want a fresh start, but I never thought it would be a deadly games. What about You ? -Not that different from You. Addicted dad, drugs debts for both of us, also other things with an internet guy who scammed him and He lost everything. »
You continued your little chat with player 222 until a guard knocked at the door, asking You to get out. When the lights will turn off you need to be In your bed.
You both left the bathroom to go back to the main room.
Once In your bed and the lights off, you weren't sleepy at all. You had too much on your mind, starting with Thanos and how you left him. Since you saw him cheating on you, you often have nightmares about that, waking up with the horrible feeling of not being enough, cause that’s exactly what you felt that day.
Two Months Ago
You were awakened by Thano’s soft kisses on your Body. You could feel every one of them, starting by the corner of your lips, going down on your jaw, your neck, your shoulders. Your skin felt like melting under his lips. You could feel him smile as he continued his way down, kissing your collarbone as his hands found their place on your hips, pressing you against his more than awake boner. Having such an effect on him makes you smile as you open your eyes. The light coming from the big window of his apartment felt like aggression. Your eyes shut again as the headache started to hit. You were probably a little bit hungover from last night.
When Thanos noticed you were awake, he smiled and slowly slid his hands under the Big t-shirt of his that you borrow every night, claiming it as your pajama.
«-Good morning Beautiful, he said as he came back to kiss your neck. -Good morning, you answered as you tried again to open your eyes.»
This time, it was easier and the sun didn’t feel like your eyes were melting. You could see the beautiful smile of your boyfriend as his lips joined yours for a passionate kiss. Passing your arms around his neck, you answered the kiss with as much passion as him.
His Hands, still on your hips until now, started moving up to your breast, gently squeezing it . A shiver passed through your body when you felt the cold air on your exposed skin since your T-shirt followed Thanos hands.
Your boyfriend ended the kiss and he took his time to look at you. Flushed cheeks, heavy breathing, exposed breast with hard nipple who seem to call for his mouth.
«-Fuck, baby, your are so beautifull.»
You didn’t know what you could answer. Thanos was one of those men who make you blush with that kind of praise. You liked that and He knew it.
With a Smile, he opened the drawer close to the bed and put out a stack of pills. For a second you thought he would take a condom but his priorities seemed to be for something else.
«-Do you really like that ? You asked, unsure. -Relax beautiful, it will just make the experience better, for both of us. »
He was about to take the pill when you stopped him.
«-Thanos, you don’t need that to make love to me.»
That’s when reality hits you like a car at full speed. You don’t even remember one time, in two years, when you was sober when it came to intimacy.
«-We can do it without, this time.-Why ? We always used to fucked when we was high. Believe my experience, it’s better.»
Fuck, not even making love. All of that made you feel suddenly uncomfortable. Gently, you pushed him from above you and replace you T-shirt to cover your body. All that just turned you off.
«-Is that what it is for you ? We just fuck. -Fucking, Banging, Hoocked up , making love. All the same. Why is that suddenly such a Big deal ? -I don’t know, I just feel like it’s wrong. We shouldn't have to be high every time we have intimacy.»
Thanos' sight as he got up and took the pill.
«-Fuck off. You turned me off with your princess shit, he said as he left the room to go to the bathroom.»
That day was no fun. You had a great time the other night after his show, you came home late, drunk and probably high and now this. Thanos never liked when people tell him how to act or how he should feel, but you should have this right, at least to make the best out of him, but when you try he just push you away.
You barely talked that day. He had another show at the same bar from yesterday and had to work on some songs, so you let him work in peace. You spent your day in a coffee shop, thinking about what happened this morning, until you realised nothing was right in this relation. You didn’t even remember him telling you he loved you. All he always said was about how good you locked, or how beautiful you was, how much fun he had with you, but never how much he loved you, and somehow that broke your heart.
You could have wait until he came home to talk to him, but you knew He will probably be to tired and too high to have a serious conversation, si you showed up at the bar before he started his show. Making your way to his private room, you was about to enter but you stopped when you heard a feminine voice coming from there. The door was a little bite opened so you could see what was happening there. That’s how you knew. The vision broke your heart more than it already was.
You saw a random girl sit on the table in the middle of the room and your boyfriend passionately kissing her. You knew Thanos for long enough to know that kind of passion. It was the ‘’ I will fuck you right here and right now ‘’ kind of one.
You saw enough so you just left with tears in your eyes and even less than a broken heart.
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ugh everything is ow
BREIF MENTIONS OF SA
Fun fact about me! I adore Epic the musical! I, uh, definitely do not adore PJO. I obviously don’t care if someone likes PJO, like, I had my phase too. But, I do need people to know WHY I dislike one Greek mythology retelling and dislike the other.
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I, personally, don’t even consider PJO/HOO, TOA Greek mythology retellings that they market themselves as. I consider them stories loosely based of Greek mythology. When I say LOOSELY I mean it. Many, many, many creative liberties were taken with that series.
I would consider Epic: The Musical a greek myth retelling. Yes, it takes creative liberties, but, not to the extent PJO does. You can tell Epic is telling the story of the Odyssey and Odysseus throughout the whole soundtrack, a stark contrast to PJO where you have to sit there and say to yourself “was this part of the myth, or something Rick Riordan made up?”
Neither are accurate sources of Greek mythology, obviously. Retellings shouldn’t me where you get your info from, kids. I’ve read the Odyssey and can personally tell you that Epic isn’t always accurate to the source material, and it cuts out a lot of things, (Ex. You know, the SA….)
Even though Epic cuts out some things, it is still a lovely retelling, even though the things they cut do bother me sometimes, I can get over it. Also, the fandom is mostly amazing. All of them are so so talented. The songs are banger too, No Longer You and Hold Them Down are actually so amazing.
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I don’t enjoy PJO for two big reasons: The fandom, and the actual books
“But Marcella!” You cry, clutching your pearls. “The PJO fandom is comprised mainly of children!”
Yes, I was one of those children many years ago. Now that we are all grown up, there are also adults in the fandom. I honestly think sometimes they are almost as bad as Disney adults. Sometimes I question if they even know what the Iliad is. I can’t be in a fandom where no one knows their Greek mythology. There are few things that bring me joy in this life. Those things are: Thanatos, Greek myths, carbs, coffee, Ares, Aphrodite, books, and on the rare occasion my friends and family. Let me have my myths please.
The books, along with butchering Greek mythology to the point I don’t even think it can be called a retelling, it also has some questionable shit. The whole thing about the fucking NAZIS, ARE WE FORGETTING ABOUT THAT? WTF WAS THAT? Also y’know, giving poor Nico every possible controversial character trait and aspect, so you could kill him off of it got too much hate. (I know your tricks, Rick, I’m a writer too)
Also, in a book where children have goodly parents and worship the Greek gods, you could have researched Hellenic polytheism just a little bit. Like, it isn’t that hard. Please bro.
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Anyways, point is, I’m not saying you can’t like PJO, and you can’t dislike Epic. Like whatever the frackadoodle you want. I just wanted you guys to know I have my reasons for being a hater.
#greek myth memes#greek mythology#greek myths#hellenic polytheistic#hellenic worship#hellenic polythiest#percy jackson#percy jackon and the olympians#epic the musical#epic the ithaca saga#epic the vengeance saga#epic the wisdom saga#epic the underworld saga#epic the thunder saga#epic the ocean saga#epic the cyclops saga#epic the troy saga#epic the circe saga#thanatos deity#ares deity#aphrodite deity#marcella rants#greek mythology retelling
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Sharpest Tool
Summary: FratBoy!Chris let’s reader down telling her that their only casual while she was thinking it was something more
Warning: angst, mentions of being a fuck buddie, makeup sex, crying, yelling, swearing, p in v, fingering
PART 1.
‘I’m looking for an answer in between the lines lying to yourself if you think we’re fine’
“What the fuck do you mean, we’re just some casual ‘friends with benefits’, you know we’re more than that!” She yelled throwing the nearest thing at him, which happened to be an empty beer can. “I mean we’re not ever gonna be anything more than what we already are, I’m sorry, but I can’t love anyone like that!” He yelled back dodging the can like it was a bomb.
“Why the fuck can’t you love me like you say you do!” She screamed hot tears running down her face, his frat boy friends watching from the sidelines whispering and making an excuse to leave to give them some space “geez you say it to every fucking girl you go balls deep in,” She cried her vision going blurry.
”Because I know I wouldn’t be able to love you like you want me to, I just don’t wanna hurt you more than you are right now” he said calmly walking up to her and grabbing her waist pulling her into a hug. “I know but I wouldn’t mind it” she said softly crying into his shoulders. “Yes you would baby, I can’t do that to you” he sighed kissing her cheek” she smiled subtly her cheeks going rosy at the sweet action. “Please,” she said her tears wet and shiny down the apple of her face. “Can we just try” she whispered leaning into his soft touch.
“No” he said softly hugging her more. “I can’t hurt you” he said kissing her neck and leaning into her. “Yes you can” she sobbed her vision going wet and blurry again, “please just say you can, we can make this work” she cried “I know we can” she said throwing her hands on his chest. “Please” she whispered calming down. “If I could I would, I promise baby” he said kissing her neck again, “let me make it up to you? Please?” He said looking at her damp eyelashes glittering up at him. “Chris..” she said unsure of Thats what she actually wanted this time. “Please I’ll make you feel better than ever” he kissed her neck “promise” he said biting at the supple skin, leaving his brushing mark. “Fine” she whined arching her neck to the side for his better angle. “That feels good” she whined as he palmed her breast, her nipples perking at the action.
“Wait” she sighed pushing him off of her body. “If I do this, please just say we’ll be more than fuck mates” she said not finished “I can’t handle another minute going on pretending I don’t love the way you make me feel! The way you touch me and the way you make me feel like the only girl you’ve ever laid a finger on, I hate that I have to go every day under your care and have you not understand the deep feelings I have for you, and how much it pains me to not tell you just how much I love you” she gasped “because I do”
He sighed “Fuck I love you so much” he said, meaning it “I never knew until now, you’re the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen, I don’t want to hurt you. And I know pushing you away will hurt you but being with me will hurt you more!” He said looking into her bloodshot eyes. “I fucking love you, I love every little detail about you, how you act like a baby when you don’t get your way, how you smile when someone smiles at you. I notice every little thing you do Y/n, I love you and how sweet you are, it doesn’t matter how bad the person is you find the good in them, you treat everybody like their somebody, even me.” He gasped for air. “Even me, when I needed someone to be there and I pushed you away, I never realized you were that someone I was looking for.”
“So show me” she said, grabbing his shoulders and kissing him deeply “Show me how much you love me” she said pulling back and looking into his deep baby blue eyes “Show me”
#chris sturniolo#fan fic#fan fiction#chris sturniolo x reader#chris sturniolo smut#christopher sturniolo#matt sturniolo#matt sturniolo smut#sturniolo triplets#Spotify
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me and my bf might have a threesome tmr night and the other guy isnt that kinky so heres my ideal threesome if i could make it perfect!!
daddy has me tied up with my thighs spread, lightly tracing my pussy with his finger. he gets a notification on his phone and smiles down at me.
"you have no fucking idea whats coming."
he grabs a slip of fabric and ties it around my head, leaving me defenseless and unable to see or move. "stay there baby" he murmurs as he leaves, as if i have a choice.
a few minutes later he returns, but this time with another pair of footsteps. i start to panic and struggle against my ropes, crying out and asking whats going on.
a sharp slap against my cheek silences me. "shut up, slut." i quickly shut my mouth right before he hits me again, much harder. "what do you say after i tell you to do something, huh?"
i twitch but keep my mouth shut, angry about my situation. he slaps me a third time on the other side of my face, the hardest one yet, before grabbing my face and hissing into my ear, "you stupid bitch. you better switch that fucking attitude or i swear to god you'll regret it. there are two of us and one of you and you're all tied up and presented to us like a fucking whore, how do you think thats gonna go for you?"
"im sorry daddy" i whimper in response before he shoves my head back and draws away.
"good." he steps back and speaks to the other person in the room. "you can touch her now."
"fucking finally" a second voice greets, higher and sharp. "where do you want me"
"can you restrain her for a minute while i take these ropes off her? i dont think we need them." i feel someones cold hands wrap around my naked body, holding me in place while daddy unties me. i feel the strangers hands pinch and squeeze my nipples and i whine while he laughs at me.
"shes fucking pathetic. is she always like this?"
"no," daddy says, "shes usually a lot brattier. she must be scared."
"aw are you scared baby? are you fucking scared?" he grabs ahold of my throat with one hand, cutting off the flow of blood to my brain. "good. you should be"
my eyes roll back as i suddenly feel my boyfriend's tongue on my clit, lapping gently before licking up my cunt. i moas as he eats me out, all while his friend abuses my exposed chest. daddy adds his fingers in too, pressing his other hand on top of my cervix and before i know it i'm about to cum. he yanks his fingers out of me.
"dumb fucking whore, youre only allowed to cum after we do."
against the hand around my neck i rasp out a "please" before daddy draws back and slaps my cunt.
"you better get to work then, bitch" i hear his tone of voice shift as he adresses his friend, "do you wanna fuck her now?" i hear him agree and before i know it they've swapped positions and flipped me onto my stomach and i can feel the tip of his dick pressed against me. "you better be grateful for that prep earlier because thats the only thing you're getting tonight. okay?"
"yes daddy," i moan as an unfamiliar dick slowly pushes its way into me.
"fuckk," i hear the voice behind me moan as he pulls back out slowly just to slam back into me and start fucking me at a brutal pace.
"wait wait wait!" i beg, squirming as i try to push past the pain of the sudden roughness.
"you want me to wait? too fucking bad bitch. your daddy said i could do whatever i wanted to you so youre at my fucking mercy." he slaps my ass so hard i yelp and grab out for my boyfriend's hand. i hear his friend laugh right before the sound of daddys belt unbuckling, a moment before he grabs the back of my head and yanks it up by my hair. i feel the tip of daddys dick slap against my open mouth and tongue.
"can you be a good girl and take two dicks at once like we talked about? yeah?" he murmurs to me as a whine out a desperate "yes," before i feel him push himself inside of mouth.
instantly i can feel how big he is and i fight to restrain my gag reflex while he sinks deeper into my throat and his friend fucks me roughly from behind. i moan around his dick right before i gag for the first time. i hear him laugh before pulling out of my mouth and slapping me.
"none of that, okay? stay fucking still."
"yes daddy," i manage to rasp before he shoves his dick down my throat again. my head goes blank as the lack of oxygen starts to get to me, barely registering whats going on as im being fucked by two men at once. after a while i hear his friend groan that hes gonna cum before his hips come to a stuttering stop and he gasps, pausing for a second and catching his breath while daddy finally relents and i draw off his dick with a grateful sob, tears shining on my cheecks and drool on my chin.
"oh you're not done yet," i hear him growl before i'm flipped over again and my hands are held back by daddy until his friend comes over and takes his place. he moves to get between my legs, running a finger up my cunt and pushing what cum had seeped out of me back in. "youre such a slut i can't fucking believe youre doing this," he taunts. i start to respond before i feel both of his hands wrap arond my throat, cutting me off.
"not a fucking word."
he thrusts into me all at once and a practically scream as i feel myself stretch around his dick. his friend lets go of my hands and guides one of them to his dick, guiding me as i jerk him off. "there you go," he mutters, "fuck youre so fucking slutty."
"isn't she?" daddy, responds, punctuating each word with a particularly hard thrust. "its so fun to lend her out. she doesnt get a say in it and at the end of the day shes still fucking mine."
his friend murmurs an agreement before i feel my boyfriends hands squeeze even tighter around my neck as i lose consciousness completely. when i come to i can tell hes close, fucking into me so fast and hard that my mind stays blank and i start babbling pleas and moans for him to stop, crying that it hurts.
"fuck thats so hot fuck dont stop crying im not gonna fucking stop" he groans as he continues, moving one hand to grab mine. it's all i can do to lie there and take it while my other hand is being quickly jerked up and down his friends dick.
"fuck im gonna cum again," moans his friend, "open your fucking mouth. i comply and i feel him cum in my mouth, the foreign salty taste startling me. hgroans as i swallow. "good girl."
daddy fucks into me even faster and i can tell hes close. i wrap my legs around his back and he cums inside of me, groaning as he fills me up. he stays like that for a while before slowly pulling out, his cum mixed with his friends' immediately dripping out of me. he removes my blindfold before pulling me in for a gentle kiss.
"you did so good baby, he whispers sweetly. "lets get you cleaned up."
AAH THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE SHORT but here we are. not proofread or anything i hope this is okay and u guys like it >.<
#g4ngb4ng#g4ngr4pe#two guys and a girl#threes0me#r4p3 fantasy#r4p3 kink#r@pe k!nk#r@pe kink#r@pe play#r@petoy#cnc free use#cnc k!nk#r@pe fantasy#1cky daughter#cnc somno#cnc stalking#cnc kidnapping#rough cnc#r4p3 k1nk#r4pepl4y#r@pedoll#r@pe b@it#r4p3 m3#r@pe m3#r@pe k1nk#1cky dad#daddy’s babygirl#bd/sm daddy#daddy k!nk#1cky brother
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I'm thinking about it real hard and tbh Neil would take Kevin's phone and block his account from Kevin's Twitter and then be the most ridiculous Kevin Fan Account. He would reply to fan theories, check them, debunk/confirm them. He would share Kevin's stats and talk so often about how much he looks up to him and his skills. the whole team just thinks Kevin knows and doesn't care.
and then one day an interviewer brings the account up and Neil can't get out fast enough, tries to deactivate it. but it ends up being something Kevin likes. The attention he enjoyed as a Raven but not the objectification. Neil telling people to fuck off and then agreeing with another that Kevin has improved. Showing details and stats and it's touching to him, even if it would be weird to anyone else. Kevin who still really craves that adoration and attention bordering on stalker/codepency and Neil who can deliver it perfectly.
Kevin bestows him with the #1 Fan title and Neil is even more insufferable after that.
#aftg#all for the game#aftg fandom#aftg trilogy#neil josten#kevin day#i just love them okay#this can be platonic or romantic or some secret third thing#whatever you want#interpret it how you want#but i just keep thinking about a “biblically accurate” Neil socmed AU#and he would spend most if not all of his online presence praising Kevin and being his biggest fan#enjoying the community of it#of no longer just having his little binder with newspaper clippings#of getting to share game snippets with other people who also realise how insanely talented Kevin is#please someone i need a friend to cry with
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bsd fic authors i understand yalls pain SO well right now why is it so fucking HARD to write dazai. like i have a whole fucking spreadsheet dedicated to tireless analysis i have done on my part so i can accurately characterize him but he is such an unpredictable and morally gray character that it's hard knowing his limits and boundaries and where he draws the line for himself.
#i hate when ppl make him out to be a sadistic villain with no remorse. like did we read the same manga 💀#but at the same time he is NOT crying abt all the ppl he sent to the grave. he sleeps just fine at night knowing he committed atrocities#yes he feels remorse? but he isn't like kunikida to weep at someone's grave for failing to save them#and then we have his emotions themselves#dazai isn't emotionless. far from it. he has difficulty expressing affection but yk he finds someone endearing when he trusts them#trust is very important to dazai and is one of the aspects of human emotion that he can fully grasp#but like everything else is in a hazy gray area that he does not feel like exploring. he feels alienated from his humanity bc of this#AUUUGHH can someone help me with character analysis PLEASE#I WASNT PAYING ATTENTION TO THIS MF UNTIL RECENTLY SO I MISSED OUT ON A LOT OF IMPORTANT DETAILS#see i would go and reread a few light novels but like i don't have time for that#and this is for dazai specifically. i am very well versed on his relationships w other charcaters#but just like asigiri himself said: it's very difficult to write dazai and write him WELL#so yeaaa i have a lot of smart ppl following me pls help#bsd#ALSO MY FRIEND STILL HAS NO LONGER HUMAN UUUUGHHHHHH I NEED THAT BACK BC I TABBED IT A SHIT TON#FOR LIKE CONNECTIONS TO YOZO AND BSD DAZAI AND WHERE ASIGIRI DREW INSPIRATION FROM YOZOS CHARACTER FOR DAZAI#THAT WOULD BE SUCH A VALUABLE FUCKING RESOURCE BC I DID SOME ANNOTATIONS IN THEM TOO BUT MY BOOK IS ANOTHER FUCKING STATE#I HATE IT HERE FML
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i wanted to see altaria rei then i started goofin around
#the only ones i could see clearly were eevee eiden and morpeko morvay#i couldn't pin rei to a single mon bc i don't know a THING ABOUT HIM yet#but i want to see ghost type rei fight ghost type kuya and they're both just super effective against each other#i wonder if all the old men automatically get honourary ghost type membership. live 300 years ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED: spooky#ANYWAY LET ME TALK ABOUT MY LIST#as in the list i was compiling of pokemon who matched the VIBE of someone and i couldn't decide#now BESIDES the ones req et al. already mentioned. which i already 👍👍👍 i was trying to find even moooore . exploring what could be.....#rei: altaria. marowak (alolan). noctowl. chandelure. decidueye. ribombee [a quiet friend :)]. inteleon.#once again i don't know rei's birdy deal yet so i won't (eheheh) pigeonhole him into an owl pokemon but we'll just wait and see#i had inteleon under rei before milke brought up sobble yakumo so now i'm like..... oh no...#rei fits the last evol and yakumo fits the first two.... uhhhhh#they can share. like they share gem placement. butt buddies.#yakumo had: girafarig. froslass. azurill (crying). tropius. wishiwashi. leavanny. marshadow.#i just want him to hang out with the food related mons and enjoy some fresh fruit with a giant flying dinosaur. yah#OK FOR EDMOND I SAW SIRFETCH'D AND COULDN'T STOP LAUGHING#WHAT A REGAL BOY. I HAVE TO. PLEASE I NEED EDMOND TO WIELD ONIONS#i was trying to be serious and find him a proper majestic pokesona . i swear. but the look on sirfetch'd's's face#edmond's list went: skarmory. lucario. cinccino. zeraora. dachsbun.#do i know edmond? i doubt. he's fluffy. wait no he's severe. wait no would he dare carry a fluffy cakey pokemon around? DARE HE????#for olivine i was even more stumped. seems like a lot of the pokemon i immediately thought of were the fluffy nurse types#stuff like chansey/blissey. kangaskhan.#this pokemon is 100% female? *flings pokedex out the window* no. olivine is a gender now#some of the newer pokemon i considered were bewear. drampa. mabosstiff.#but once again these were all just Protective of the Little Ones types#so i was imagining olivine just chilling with his serene smile and an army of MASSIVE CARETAKER POKEMON behind him#but. there has to be more to him than just taking care of others . furrows brow. idk. i'll settle for lapras FOR NOW#ditto eiden riding on the back of lapras. wonderful. glorious#pokemon crossover
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i have no friends who care about me because my personality is boring and understimulating and i have no selling point as a friend and i am being left behind
#negative.#sometimes it’s like. oh i wish people liked me as much as i like them. lmao.#‘we should hang out!!’ ‘we should call!!’ ‘we should play a game!!’ okay but please actually do it :((#i feel like i take so much time to show love and care but maybe i’m doing it wrong?? do i seem fake?? is there something off putting??#i need better friends both online and offline because i’m socially starved#w the exception of like. two people??#every time i try it devolves into generic small talk#and there’s that autistic feeling that i’m saying everything wrong. i’m doing it wrong. they’re giving me that look or their text format#has changed and i’m being wrong#i can’t break out of it. i’ve just stopped reaching out these past couple months and like. genuinely no one said a thing#can anyone please show that they even think about me. like. god.#i go through hell every single fucking day and i have attempted suicide more times in the last year than the last decade#i’m not seeking attention i just?? would love for someone to give a single fuck for once. oh god.#the csa trauma that was triggered this year has been eating me whole. no one knows and no one cares to know#i’ve told two people now total now. even as i’m telling them it feels like i’m dumping it on them and making them uncomfortable#i regret telling one of them. my closest irl friend. god. should’ve kept it in. i can’t stop doing everything wrong.#anyways. i think…. i am going to go cry for a while lmao#man this sucks. mannnnnn this sucks#anyways.txt#(not a vague. never a vague)
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Just finished season 6 of the Dragon Prince
(More coherent thoughts in tags)
#tdp#the dragon prince#tdp spoilers#the dragon prince season 6#the dragon prince season six#Jesus where do I even begin#it was so profound#so well written#so raw and emotional and yet so triumphant in some parts#I already related to Soren because of who I am and my relationship with my father#this season was like a stab to the heart#and then it has the gall to make me cry tears of joy#because of the queer wedding and just. all the love#this season had a lot of death and destruction but also so much love#love for partners#love for family#love for friends#it was all so gut wrenching in how it could be both hopeful and tragic#anyways the writers cooked#however I will be asking them to pay for my therapy#someone please talk to me about this season#dms or reblogs idc I need to RANT#also I saw so much symbolism and motifs in the backgrounds and so on FUCCCKKK#please please someone let me ramble about the beautiful writing decisions
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the way i would do anything to be friends with dallas
#literally one of the funniest people ever#his interviews are TOP TIER#i wanna be his friend so mf bad#HE GETS ME#need someone like him irl#i need my real life dallas and gordon friendship PLEASE OR I WILL CRY#actually. gimme the whole cast#IMMEDIATELY#COLLEGE PLEASE PULL THROUGH#GIVE ME MY FOUND FAMILY I BEG#avatar the last airbender#atla#avatar#atla live action#dallas liu#gordon cormier#kiawentiio#ian ousley
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HERA AND LEIA ARE PALS. AHSOKA AND EZRA AND SABINE REUNITED. AHSOKA IS HOPEFUL AND THRIVING. THREEPIO IS HERE ON BEHALF OF SENATOR AND DEFENSE COORDINATOR LEIA ORGANA. ZEB IS TRAINING RECRUITS. MY HEART IS FULL.
#Ahsoka#Ahsoka spoilers#Ahsoka spoiler#I only need one more thing and that’s Hera reunites with her boy now#if I see Zeb and Ezra reunited I will be through the moon#but I NEED Hera to see and hold her boy after all this time#it will only take that and my skin will be clear my crops will be watered my faith will be restored#it’s a simple request#a humble plea#as I sit here screaming crying losing my marbles#can we talk about leia and Hera being friends tho#can we imagine the wine nights#please someone write Hera and Leia’s conversation about this#can we talk about Mon Mothma looking like an exasperated mom friend#‘NOW what have the pair of you gone and done’#‘I can’t leave you two alone for two seconds’#‘I’m relieved you won’t be arrested but I’m going to kill you both’#Mon mothma’s voice going soft as soon as she saw threepio#that did something to my heart#Hera’s SMILE when she saw him#teva having enough of chopper’s respect that he could hold a hand up to him and not be murdered#Zeb is training recruits ����😭😭😭#do you think they remind him of young Ezra#and Ahsoka#can we TALK about Ahsoka#look how much better she’s doing#how much more confident#and hopeful#and involved and emotional and HAPPY#I’ve run out of TAGS
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sometimes i think about killing myself just so my family will be free of the burden that is me and finally leave the country.
#random thoughts#but that's another selfish thought. both my mother and my brother now have told me i am selfish.#and selfish to rather want to kill myself than improve on myself. i don't know how to improve.#my brother says all i care about is myself. and my friends. and that i'd rather have my friends than my family be happy.#which sometimes yes i would. i'm selfish enough to forget about my family all the time.#i need to improve but i don't know how. someone who is almost two years younger claims to be more emotionally intelligent.#and it's true. is it? i don't know.#i don't know. how to improve. i feel both too young and too old to know how.#i'll talk to my therapist again soon. but i can't because help from others will cause chaos.#and i can't talk to people because they won't listen. but do i even understand what i'm saying?#and i can't cut myself because that's selfish also.#i don't know if i want to even leave because i have so many friends that love me and i love them too.#more than my family? selfish selfish selfish.#all i am is someone who wants to please. so people will like me.#so that i feel good about myself. no. so that they feel good about themselves#so i make them feel good. i want to do that.#but first i need to leave them.#and earlier i wanted to cry but i was in the presence of my mother. and so we embraced.#i feel worse than ever like i am back in august.#i can't be fixed i can't be saved. can we get to the good part already now.
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