#please let me know if there are any errors with the transcription
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[Transcript: As Israel prepares to invade Rafah, violate Joe Biden's red line, and kill who knows how many more thousands of innocent men, women, and children in Gaza, we need to talk about the elephant in the room. We need to talk about the hostages. Because the Israelis say this is all about the hostages. They say we don't talk about the hostages enough. So let's do that. Let's talk today about the hostages, because there are three very important things they don't tell you about the hostages.
First, for everyone who believes that Benjamin Netanyahu and his government of far-right fascists and racists are fighting their war in Gaza in order to rescue the hostages. How do they explain the fact that Netanyahu had a chance to bring all of the civilian hostages home right at the very beginning? Those aren't my words. That's not my opinion. It's the view of Haim Rubinstein, who until very recently was a spokesman for the families of the Israeli hostages and who said last week, quote, "We learned that Hamas offered on October 9th or 10th to release all captive civilians in its hands if the IDF did not enter the Gaza Strip, but the government rejected the offer."
(whenever an article is mentioned its headline appears on screen with the section just quoted. This article is from זמןשראל The Times Of Israel April 29, 2024 There is no doubt that Netanyahu is preventing a deal to release the abductees)
In fact, the Washington Post reported on a similar proposal at the end of October, saying "Hamas was proposing to release all foreign civilian hostages in exchange for a five-day cease-fire. Israeli civilian hostages would be released if additional demands were met," he said. "Including the release of Palestinian women and children in Israeli prisons and the opening of the Rafah border crossing."
(Article: The Washington Post Oct. 26, 2023 Israel Raids Gaza with tanks; U.N. says 'nowhere is safe' for civilians by Miriam Berger, Kareem Fahim, Sarah Dadouch, Claire Parker, and Karen DeYoung)
Second, for everyone who pops up on my Twitter feed to still tell me, "Well, Hamas could end this war if they just released all the hostages." Have they paid any attention to anything the Israeli government has actually said on this subject? Israeli officials have said time and again that the war won't end until Hamas is destroyed, regardless of whether the hostages are released. Bezalel Smotrich, Israel's finance minister, made clear this week he was opposed to any hostage release deal that stopped Israel from going into Rafah.
(Onscreen Tweet by חדשות @/kann_news on April 30, 2024: "Minister Smotrich announced that he would not support the current deal for the release of hostages: 'The head and the truth say that this deal must be opposed. I am ready to pay a heavy personal price to prevent this danger.' @/diklaaharon")
Now, you might say that's just Smotrich he's not in charge. Well, Prime minister Benjamin Netanyahu also said this week that he would invade Rafah with or without a deal on the hostages. His words, not mine.
(Article: AP April 30, 2024 Netanyahu vows to invade Rafah 'with or without a deal' as cease-fire talks with Hamas continue By Tia Goldenberg and Matthew Lee)
And third, something that keeps being left out of the mainstream media, ignored by all those who claim to care about hostages, is that the hostages at the core of this conflict, at the heart of this current round of killing and violence, aren't just Israelis. They're Palestinians too. Yes, Palestinians too. Because while we're all aware of the fact that around 250 hostages were taken from Israel by Hamas and other armed groups on October the 7th, including shamefully children, and around 130 hostages remain in captivity in Gaza, we don't really mention the hundreds, thousands of Palestinians who've been rounded up, detained, held without trial, tortured, sexually abused, without any charges, let alone convictions in Israeli prisons. And I'm not even talking about just since October the 7th, I'm talking about before October the 7th. According to the Israeli human rights group at Salem, on the eve of the October 7th attacks at the end of September 2023, Israel was holding over 1,300 Palestinians as hostages in what they conveniently call administrative detention.
(Article: בצלם B'Tselem بتسيلم November 20, 2023 Statistics on administrative detention in the Occupied Territories
"At the end of September 2023, the Israel Prison Service (IPS) was holding 1,310 Palestinians in administrative detention.")
Around half of them for a year or more, and 23 of them, shamefully, children held without trial, without charge. The reality is that under international law, hostage-taking is a war crime whether Palestinians or Israelis do it. Just as intentionally targeting and killing civilians is a war crime whether Palestinians or Israelis do it.
So to summarize then, the Netanyahu government chose not to do a deal to release the Israeli hostages according to the spokesman for their family members. Even if Hamas were to release the hostages tomorrow morning, Israel has no plans to end its assault on Gaza. And the biggest issue of all, the hostages aren't just on the Israeli side. They're on the Palestinian side, too. Those are the facts. The objective, demonstrable, undeniable facts.
And look. This is a human tragedy. Many innocent Israelis are wrongly being held hostage in Gaza, and many Israeli families are waiting for a father, a brother, a loved one to come home. And to them, I say, I stand in solidarity in humanity with you. I say, free the hostages, Israeli and Palestinian. But, and there is a but, as the Israeli military prepares to wipe out Rafah and kill thousands more people, remember this when the bad faith apologists for Israel pop up on TV or online to justify that violence and to robotically and cynically repeat "What about the hostages?" Ignoring all of the three things that I just pointed out to you. Treat that dishonest refrain with the contempt it deserves.
The video concludes with a watermark for zeteo.com and the TikTok handle @/zeteonews. End transcript]
For everyone who keeps saying “wHaT aBoUt ThE hOsTaGeS?!?! ReLeAsE tHe HoStAgEs!!1!”
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i recently came across a scanned image (at this website) of an essay written by Theodore Sturgeon, published June 1967 in Cavalier Magazine, where Sturgeon describes his 'signature mark' and the ethos it represents for him. i decided to transcribe the article for future reference, and figured that people who follow me might also find it insightful and inspiring.
especially when it can be so easy to take something that has been presented as a fact at face value, i think we can always benefit from a reminder to ask the next question.
the symbol being described is an uppercase letter Q with a right-facing arrow striking through it. in my transcription i chose to represent the symbol with (-Q->). check out the scanned image of the essay to see how it was originally printed.
⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄
I give you this symbol. I want you to wear it between your eyeball and your eyelid and look at the world through it. I want to do this, and I want you to do what I say, because you are not the crawling blob in that big bucket of ooze which, down deep, you think you are: you are Mankind. That isn't the best thing in the Universe to be, but it can be. It can be. It will be, if you do what I tell you. All I ask of you is that you hear me out.
Here is the symbol: (-Q->)
What it means is: Ask the next question.
Every advance this species has ever made is the result of someone, somewhere, looking at his world, his neighborhood, his neighbor, his cave, or himself, and asking that next question. Every deadly error this species has committed, every sin against itself and its high destiny, is the result of not asking the next question, or of not listening to those who do ask it.
That next question, (-Q->), is nothing more than a signboard which points toward the truth; the absolute, furthermost irreducible truth. there are not many absolutes, but we know one thing about them all: they are not complicated. More on that later.
First, an example of (-Q->) in action. Let's take something that has filled countless thousands of newspaper inches, in computable hours of argument and temper, a rich crop of injustice and stupidity, and has wasted a great deal more time than it is worth - the pornography question. We'll start with the warcry "we've got to get that filth off the newsstands!"
This is quite enough, in many communities, to gain a majority support right now. "Right-thinking people" gather up their axe-handles and burning torches and rally round what looks to them like the ultimate and self-defining truth. Now we ask that next question:
(-Q->): Why? A: Because it can get into the hands of young people
At this point, for many people, doors close, shutters bang, and all the lights go out inside. But that answer isn't an answer, as you can discover by asking the next question:
(-Q->): What happens if it gets into the hands of young people? A: It might arouse them.
Slam. Bang. Click... but wait. Isn't there another question? Sure!
(-Q->): What happens if they get aroused?
This will probably get you a variety of answers, and you'll forgive me if I don't pursue them in this question-and-answer format, because I haven't much space and I mean to pack it as full as I can. But you get the pattern: every time anyone answers that next question, that (-Q->), see if there isn't another one which can be asked. In this instance you can run the thing down until you find out on the highest scientific (and morally ethical) authority that it doesn't harm anyone to get sexually stimulated with no outlet; that it happens all the time to virtually everyone; that the list of things which stimulate one person or another at various times are by no means limited to what one finds in the girlie books, but include such things as pieces of string, wash on the line, sunsets, music, dogs howling, and a thousand other things, and if you got rid of all that filth you'd find yourself on a desert or in a cell - where, probably, your imagination would do a whole heap worse than any professional pornographer; further, that if the young person is stimulated to find an outlet it is, in a vast majority of cases, masturbation, which does not make green hairs grow in the palms of your hands, which does not cause pimples, and in the case of hyperactive individuals leaves them less likely to commit rape than more - especially if they are free of guilt about it. How do I know all this? By getting my questions answered, and by unfailingly asking that one more. If you do the same, you'll find the references, the carefully performed and documented experiments, the careful analyses and cross-checked conclusions. Let me here caution you never to abandon the (-Q->) technique when it leads you to a conclusion you like. Ask that one more question again, and ask it again... really, the only time you won't be able to ask it will be when you're up against a truth so basic and so simple that the question can't be asked.
And I've never had an answer that was that close to the truth - not ever. But in looking for it I've gotten rid of an awful lot of well-known facts that just ain't so. It makes you very light-hearted, very sure, and rather hard to hurt.
Now about basics and simplicity: complicated and subtle things can be overwhelming and they can change your whole life and the face of the world, but if they are complicated they are not (in the most important sense) important. Now here's a simple basic: living things change. Growth is one of the many kinds of change; what you can be sure of is that anything that has stopped changing has stopped living. Got it?
You are alive. Your family and your town and the county and state and nation are, each in its way, living things. All living things want to feel secure. Human beings are accursed with something that makes most of them, at one time or another in his life, seek security by stopping. He wants things stable and permanent and unchanging, like a pyramid. But there is another kind of stability - dynamic stability - the steadiness of a gull's flight. It's something that cannot happen unless the bird is in motion.
And by and large, friend, gulls outlast pyramids.
This is the kind of conclusion that the (-Q->) process leads you to, and armed with it you can look about you with a kind of Man from Mars astonishment. Living things (nations, cities, towns, families, people) trying to be dead. Trying to stop - stop time, stop change, stop thought, when they could spread their wings and rise it... Listen:
Laws are always late. Usually in the past, and certainly in a faster-and-ever-faster moving future, by the time a law is passed the circumstances which brought it about have already begun to change, which is why so many of them rule us by "the dead hand." As far as I know, no human group has ever tried to establish a whole body of laws with tenure - laws which would expire on a certain date unless the community voted to continue them! How much public apathy do you think you'd find in a democracy like that? Listen:
(-Q->): What is the function of the incest taboo? No - wait - don't give me those answers that "everybody knows," because nobody knows. If you start out on that recessive defective gene bit, with the idiot children of first cousins and all that, I'll only refer you to animal breeders the world over, and hope you enjoyed those idiot pork chops last night, and have fun with the loot you picked up at the $2 window, courtesy of the dark horse who paid 83 to 1 and who is the result of a dozen generations of inbreeding. Men are different from hogs and horses - but biologically they are not all that different. Listen:
Olaf Stapledon, bless his memory, wrote a book called Last and First Men which traces the history of Man through the next couple of hundred billion years. He speaks of something similar to what I call the (-Q->) process, and calls it "the precious insight." Through the generations, he says, it appears repeatedly and is repeatedly struck down by accidents large or small (well, we can't do much about that) "or," he says, "by an access of racial imbecility, or by the mere cowardice and vertigo that dares not look down the precipice of the fact."
I think we are in such a period of "racial imbecility" as he describes. I think that there are a few people around - you, for example - who can cure it because they are not afraid to look down the precipice of the fact, no matter how deep the pit, no matter how different.
All I ask of you is that you look at what is there, and ask that next question. In exchange I offer more than those who claim that this act idea, or that, will save this species from extinction. I offer this species its maturity and triumph.
I just heard a voice from one of you:
(-Q->): Just who the hell do you think you are? A: That's it. Don't stop there.
-- TheodoreSturgeon, 1967
#more emphasis: i didn't write this#please let me know if there are any transcription errors!#i just really wanted to transcribe it to personally draw from later and figured i might as well share it with anyone who might be intereste#it also started me down a bit of a rabbit hole about who theodore sturgeon was and i've found some pretty cool stuff#plus i always find it fascinating when something 'from so long ago' is so incredibly relevant to current affairs and this essay definitely#falls into that category#theodore sturgeon#ask the next question#media literacy#critical thinking#essay#stochastic ramblings#long post
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Updated! A few days ago the contract Crowley signs in S1 came up on discord. Being the crazy person that I am, I set on the quest of finding out what it actually says. I couldn't make out everything, especially at the end where Crowley's hand and the sparks obscure the lines but I made out most of it (transcript below the break).
One of the things I like the most is that the contract specifically says "Anthony Crowley of Mayfair, London." In the book, Hastur tells Crowley not to use that name: "No. Not A. J. Crowley. Your real name.” Crowley nodded mournfully, and drew a complex, wiggly sigil on the paper. It glowed redly in the gloom, just for a moment, and then faded."
Interesting things:
The contract is referred to as "the Agreement" - HA!
The contract is between Hastur and Ligur ("the Customer") and Crowley ("the Service Provider"). Not with Hell itself or with Satan.
The contract never actually says what "the Service" is nor does it say how much Crowley is supposed to be paid (so is it just delivering the baby to the convent, or all the upbringing too?)
There is a part that says Hastur and Ligur will pay the costs when the operation is done. But later on it also says that Crowley will not be reimbursed for his own expenses. Talk about being shortchanged!
Hastur and Ligur will NOT provide any help
Crowley must contribute to a retirement plan (Superannuation) for himself and his employees if he has any (how thoughtful)
And lastly, I learned the UK has Superannuations and it is not just an Australian thing! (go figure! the things GO teaches me)
So here you have it. A contract from Hell! literally If anyone can make out the words I couldn't or finds an error, please let me know and I'll update this one.
Full transcript:
[Line covered by clip and Ligur’s fingers] (the "Agreement")
BETWEEN
HASTUR AND LIGUR of HELL (the "Customer")
AND
ANTHONY J CROWLEY of MAYFAIR LONDON (the "Service Provider")
BACKGROUND a. The Costumer is of the opinion that the Service Provider has the necessary qualifications experience and abilities to provide services for the Customer. The Costumer will pay the Service Provider per project agreed. Each project has its own costs and the Service Provider agrees to inform the Customer what are the costs involved when setting the operation and the Costumer agrees to pay the total amount when the project is delivered. b. The Compensation will be payable upon completion of the Services. The Service Provider is responsible for paying any Superannuation Guarantee contributions that may be required in relation to the work performed by the Service Provider or by the employees of the Service Provider under this Agreement c. The above Compensation includes all applicable sales tax, and dues as required by law
Provision of Extras a. The Customer will not provide any resources, assistance or extra for use by the Service Provider in providing the Services Reimbursement of Expenses b. The Service Provider will not be reimbursed for expenses incurred by the Service Provider in connection with providing the Services of this Agreement. Independence of Services c. In providing the Sevices under the Agreement it is expressly agreed that the Service Provider is acting as an independent contractor and not as an employee. The Service Provider and the Customer acknowledge that the Agreement does not create a partnership or joint venture between them, and is exclusively a contract for service
Notes a. All suits, requests, demands or other communication required or permitted by the terms of this Agreement by will be given in writing and delivered to the Parties of the Agreement as follows
ANTHONY J CROWLEY of MAYFAIR LONDON
HASTUR AND LIGUR of HELL
and each [Illegible words due to Crowley’s hand] notify the other.
[ILLEGIBLE WORD]
ANTHONY J CROWLEY
#good omens#crowley#hastur and ligur#antichrist#contract from hell#Crowley apparently is supposed to pay into his pension plan#which brings the question#does Hell expect demons to retire eventually?#probably not
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Avatar but with Na'vi captions/subtitles Na'vi → English and English → Na'vi
Detailed notes under cut!
[edit] Correcting a few slips and typos:
Rolo'a nìtxan tsaw tsaw should be tsakem because the thing he's referring to is an action
fko a ralpeng tìkanti Eywayä fko should be 'awpo
Fmoli kivar ayoe sawtuteti alahe Sawtuteti should be sawtuteru; the sky people were the students, not the lesson 😅 this one was a particularly dumb slip on my part and I'm not sure how I missed it, hìtxoa ma eylan, krro krro lu oe skxawng 🙃
For peng san Toruk Makto syaw foru Foru should be ayngaru; I got caught up in the original English "calls to them" and forgot that I set it up in Na'vi as a direct quote so it should be "calls to you" 🙃 gosh i miss kelutral emojis these regular ones just aren't the same i need Derp ;w;
Corrections complete, now back to the original notes:
I have been wanting to do something like this for a while. I initially planned to do more scenes, but was having trouble finding the clips (unfortunately I don't have a full editable copy of A1 like I do with A2...that said, if anyone knows where i might source such a thing...let me know >_>)
At first I planned to add only captions (plus accurate subtitles, because as you can see the official ones can be a bit ehhhh lol) for the actual spoken Na'vi, but then halfway through editing I was like "lol y'know what'd be funny, if I also translated all the English dialogue into Na'vi". so i did ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
That said, on to the more specific notes:
Na'vi → English
First a disclaimer that any "corrections" are made for nerdy/educational purposes, not to say "haha look at these dumb actors who can't speak right". Memorizing lines in a foreign language is hard, and I'm sure delivering those lines while acting is even harder! It makes sense that there'll be mispronunciations, accidentally dropped words, smoothing over tìftang, etc. Plus, practically speaking, the number of people in the general audience who know or care whether the Na'vi is mispronounced is....................extremely small, so ^^; yeah.
Unfortunately for me I am part of that extremely small number, so as someone who studies and teaches this language as a hobby, I still felt obligated to make a note of some of the more glaring errors, hence the "actor transcription" slot that sometimes appears, which is there to contrast the intended line with what the actor actually said if and when they're different.
Learners, please note that just because I didn't include an actor transcription doesn't necessarily mean the line was pronounced perfectly—there are a lot of small vowel slips etc. that I didn't bother to "correct" because I felt it was still understandable even if it's technically inaccurate (mixing up a/ä is a common one for instance, as is mixing up i/ì/e), and catching all of them would've taken far more time ^^; That said, admittedly which ones counted as "I should note this" and which ones were "I'll let that slide" was a bit played by ear but w/e, hopefully it is still useful or at least interesting ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
i apologize to Mo'at for adding extra ???? to one of her transcribed lines, I was tired when I made that panel lol
English → Na'vi
Making the Na'vi → English section is fairly straightforward, as I didn't really have to do any of the translating—all the canon lines are freely available online and have been for years. I just had to edit them into the video. For the English → Na'vi section, however, I had to do the translating myself—and therefore feel the need to go through it a little more line-by-line, to justify some of my decisions hrh.
It's nice to meet you, sir → Lu sìltsan fwa ultxarun ngengati Two things about this line: one, I was a little stuck on whether I should use ultxa si (to meet intentionally) or ultxarun (to meet by chance/to encounter). I ended up going with ultxarun because ultxa si made it sound to me more like this meeting had been arranged, which of course it hadn't. Jake may not have "encountered" Eytukan in the sense of stumbling across him in the woods, but he certainly didn't set out with the intention to meet him; the chance circumstances just kinda brought him here.
Two, Na'vi (as far as we currently know) doesn't really have separate honorifics like "sir" or "ma'am". What it does have, though, is formal first- and second-person pronouns, so I used the formal ngenga instead of the casual nga to indicate the (attempted) respectful attitude of "sir".
three, i so wanted to bop Jake on the head while editing this lol, buddy your skxawng is showing
one who interprets the will of Eywa → fko a ralpeng tìkanit Eywayä Initially I was going to translate "will" as tìnew (want/desire), but then changed it to tìkan (aim/purpose/goal/intention). Tìnew sounded more to me like Eywa is discreetly requesting specific actions which the tsahìk must interpret and answer to, while tìkan sounded more like Eywa is just doing her Eywa thing and the tsahìk is simply interpreting what that means, which felt more accurate to me.
What are you called? → Pefya fko syaw ngaru? No need to justify this one, it's pretty straightforward lol—I just think it's fun that she worded it that way in English, because "how does one call to you?" is the standard way of asking someone's identity in Na'vi!
It is hard to fill a cup which is already full → Lu ngäzìk fwa teya si tsngalur a lu teya mi again no justifying really needed, I was just kinda proud of this line because I made it rhyme lol
Jarhead clan → olo' alu Sähena-re'o Na'vi doesn't typically describe nouns with other nouns like that (sähena-re'o), but I felt like it worked for Jake's spitballing. plus Eytukan's about to drop the term "uniltìranyu-tsamsiyu" in the next few lines anyways so i think i can get a pass lol
For my people → Suteri oeyä Ok, for such a short little line this one definitely had me conflicted. If I were to translate the full line "I was afraid for my people", I would say suteri oeyä oe txopu soli (lit. "concerning my people, I was afraid"). In the forest dialect the topical is always supposed to come at the beginning of the sentence. However, that's not how Neytiri delivers the line, and I wanted to keep it consistent with her delivery. In the end I decided that fudging the "topical must come first" rule here was ok here because she is essentially saying "I was afraid", realizing that Jake might not understand what she meant, then doubling back to clarify "for my people".
I considered using fpi ("for the sake of/for the benefit of") instead of the topical, but that felt off, as if Neytiri being afraid somehow benefitted the clan.
I also considered using Na'vi instead of sute—I'd have to drop the oeyä for this because "my the People" sounds silly, but "I was afraid for the People" as in the Na'vi as a whole would make sense here. However, a standalone "Na'viri" just didn't look right to me, and while fpi Na'vi/Na'vifpi" looked a little better, I'd already decided that fpi wasn't quite what I wanted.
So, in the end I stuck with suteri oeyä concerning my people.
Jake's and Tsu'tey's speech
This one gets its own little section because it was an interesting case; I'm basically redoing Tsu'tey's job. Now, if you take the entirety of Jake's speech and line it up with the entirety of Tsu'tey's translation, it's pretty good; they do basically say the same thing (I suspect this is actually what happened lol, that KP was given the full speech and asked to translate it and said "yeah ok" and wrote Tsu'tey's version).
As you can see, though, when you go through it line-by-line the way it's delivered in the movie, it's....not always quite accurate lol. So I made a version that was a more literal to Jake's speech line-by-line.
On that note, I've noticed that KP tends to really prefer the shortened versions of case endings ("for" vs "foru" etc.) I like them sometimes ("oey" and "ngey" have really been growing on me lately lol), but as a personal style preference I wouldn't have used them in all the same places he does (this is 100% a personal preference thing that will vary between speakers, neither is more or less "correct"). That said, if and when one of the lines I translated wound up being very similar to what Tsu'tey already said, out of respect for the original I went ahead and kept the same shortened endings, as well as matching the word order.
You ride out as fast as the wind can carry you → Kämakto nìwin nìfya'o a win nìftxan na hufwe atusul Literally, "ride out in a manner as fast as the running wind".
Ngl I actually VASTLY prefer Tsu'tey's version of this one lol. "May the wind propel you" is a lovely "meaning-not-words" interpretation and I like it a lot. However, for comparisons' sake I wanted to do one that was closer to Jake's original line. That said, I'm not surprised they went with a less literal translation for this line because "as fast as the wind can carry you" is actually really hard to pull off grammatically in Na'vi. It'd have to be like "as fast as the wind's ability which is to carry you" or smth, which just sounded clunky imo. So I decided that "as fast as the running wind" was a good middle ground. Not as clean or poetic as Tsu'tey's interpretation, but techincally closer to Jake's original line without being too clunky.
peng san I'm not sure if the quotation opener is strictly necessary here but it felt more cohesive to have it in my personal opinion, so I added it to mine but didn't mark it as a mistake in Tsu'tey's.
//
and uhhhhh that's it I think. Perhaps one day I will make a part 2 if I get access to more scenes. I also already have an English → Na'vi translation of an A2 scene that I'm gonna make into a subtitled video one of these days. I'd love to do a Na'vi → English for A2 as well, but unfortunately we don't currently have a complete list of the Na'vi lines for A2 like we do for A1, and as you have seen here actor delivery can make it very hard to translate by ear, even for experienced learners. Maybe someday...
#edit: some minor corrections have been added to the notes under the cut ('twas bound to happen :'))#lì'fya leNa'vi#avatar#avatar 2009#na'vi#neytiri#jake sully#eytukan#tsu'tey#moat#just wait i bet i'm gonna suddenly discover like ten gazillion mistakes AFTER I post-- >:'D
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saint endalim's scholasticate questline
my transcript of the scholasticate quests is finally done! i started organising it years ago for myself, this account has really motivated me to finish old projects. when i first started, the online records that i could find for the quests were lacking, and i really wanted them to be more accessible. some reference material exists now, but i still want to share my script. i hope it may be of use to somebody.
aside from the story, i recorded optional dialogue, added references to the scholasticate in different quests, and other information such as alternate emote responses by some characters. essentially, it's a project made out of love for the scholasticate quests and its characters.
here is the link!
i truly believe the scholasticate questline carries a wonderful amount of lore, discussion on ishgardian faith post-heavensward, noble-commoner relationships, and interesting, fluid character dynamics.
this is the first time i've posted something like this, so if there's any errors, please let me know! similarly, i'm open to feedback on improving it.
#ffxiv#scholasticate#the scholasticate#heavensward#ff14#final fantasy#ishgard#ishgardian#ffxiv lore#elezen#transcript#theomocent#archombadin de dzemael#dzemael#lebrassoir de bonfaurt#crammevoix de maintigny#leigh#blaisie de manseauguel#briardien de manseauguel#cherry post#text#my beloved
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On Doctor Who, Disability and Davros
Russel T Davies in Doctor Who: Unleashed, Children in Need Special
We had long conversations about bringing Davros back because he's a fantastic character. Time and society and culture and taste has moved on, and there's a problem with the Davros of old in that he's a wheelchair user who is evil...
...and I've had problems with that, and a lot of us on the production had problems with that, of associating disability with evil and, trust me, there's a very long tradition of this.
I'm not blaming people in the past at all, but the world changes and when the world changes, Doctor Who has to change as well.
So we made the choice to bring back Davros without the facial scarring and without the wheelchair, or his support unit, which functions as a wheelchair. I say this is how we see Davros now. This is what he looks like. This is 2023. This is our lens. This is our eye. Things used to be in black and white, they're not in black and white anymore. And Davros used to look like that and he looks like this now. And that we are absolutely standing by.
I think, because it's Children in Need night, it's a night where issues of disability or otherness or being excluded from society come right to the front of the conversation. So, of all the nights to make this change, I thought it was absolutely vital to do this, and I'm very very proud of the fact that we have.
Russell talking about disability representation in Doctor Who, straight away, in the very first episode is making me feel things.
Do I agree with everything he's said about disability representation and villains, absolutely (see every James Bond film/book.)
Do I agree with their approach to Davros? Maybe, maybe not. It's a very complicated topic on which I do not have the lived experience to speak.
But they are thinking about it. And they clearly care. And that fills me with so much hope for the future.
N.B. I copied the interview transcript from the current BBC iPlayer subtitles. All inaccuracies and emphasis are my own. Please let me know of any errors.
#doctor who#dr who#disability#doctor who unleashed#bbc three#david tennant#rtd#rtd2#russel t davies#children in need#rhyme rants#Destination Skaro#fourteenth doctor
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Bug Fables Transcript
If you like bug fables and want an easy way to reference the in-game text, then I have the site for you!
https://bugfablestranscript.neocities.org/
I’ve spent the last few months setting up and formatting the raw dialogue files into an easy to read setup, with sections divided by main story/sidequestline, geographical area, and character.
So...yeah, enjoy! Feel free to use the stuff on there for whatever fan project/fic/etc that you want (as long as you don’t take credit for the site itself or use it for ai stuff). In fact that part’s encouraged, since that kind of stuff is what made me wanna do this in the first place.
(Also if you see any kinds of errors - typos, broken links, information that I somehow got wrong, stuff from the ‘can’t figure out if/where it goes’ page that you know about - please let me know! Did my best to check on that stuff but also there’s just so much aha)
(also also if there’s any other sites etc with bug fables fan communities and you wanna drop the link (with credit) I also encourage that because. I am not active on anywhere else and they deserve to see it too)
#bug fables#an aquila original#more like aquila makes an easily readable textdump transcript of the bug game#feels weird doing an 'official announcement' style post when I've been talking about it for ages#so much that idk what to say here specifically. but also wanna be sure to get it out there for people#and I really wanted to have something to pin to my blog for people. so here we go!#edit: added in some stuff I was thinking about putting in an rb and then instantly changed my mind
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REFERENCE TO JON AND MARTIN IN EPISODE 17
RIGHT HELLO I NEED TO KNOW I'M NOT CRAZY HERE.
I loved episode 17, and this isn't even to talk about the VERY interesting details to do with Celia at the start, and the jmj error at the end (trust me, those are whole crates of worms to be opened), but this post in particular is about a very quick, very sly detail at the start of the statement.
Allow me, if you will, to quote directly from the transcript:
"Anyway, there was a new receptionist behind the old front desk, some big, soft-looking guy who stumbled over every word. A year ago, it would probably have wound me right up, but what can I say? Therapy works.
There was another patient too, some bookish-looking guy with serious city miles. I used to play the game “what are you in for,” where I would pass the time guessing… well. You know. In my head he was definitely some kind of weird pervert, really into stroking orchids or something."
PLEASE TELL ME I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE HEARING SEASON 1 JON AND MARTIN? Let's check the list:
Big, soft looking guy: that runs true with every canon description we've heard about Martin, not to mention ALL the fanart. Not to conflate fanon with canon, but here it's pretty cut and dry. Besides, 'stumbled over every word'? Now that is Martin to a tee, particularly in season 1.
Bookish-looking guy: oh, it's not like we know a certain stuffy archivist who is known for saying 'good lord' and describing merry-go-rounds as 'thrilling'. Again, I'm not saying those are the same thing but COME ON. The next bit is also interesting: 'serious city miles'. That can refer to someone who looks rough due to life incidents or substance use, and we do know that Jon is a smoker. The stroking orchids bit I have no clue about, likely just a funny line.
Their roles in this cameo are interesting as well; Martin as a receptionist and Jon as a patient. Besides thinking of a dozen fanfic AUs that would leap from this topic, it sort of reverses the power dynamic? Well, not exactly, but the roles do make sense given what we know about them: Martin being very caring and compassionate, but not the most qualified, and Jon's mental state being...less than stellar, this totally checks out.
Now, I'm not banking any firm theories on this; honestly I think we're still too early in the podcast to have a semblance of the 'real' plot, but if this is foreshadowing instead of just a cute nod to the characters, here is the proposal I'll make:
What if the dimension shifting didn't happen perfectly? This episode already deals with identity, and body vs mind vs soul. What if that is Jon and Martin's actual bodies, but their souls got separated? Now these incorporeal souls need a host...maybe an old computer database? What if those 'city miles' weren't just any old marks, but worm holes, desolation burns, our Jon's scars and wounds. What if their bodies have forgotten what happened to them?
There is a good chance that this goes totally nowhere. Still though, I'm calling it early. So excited to see where this all goes!
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this is. so fucking stupid
i put way too much effort into this
edit: picture formatting
transcription/image ID and more under the cut
[panel one: Error is looking at blue, who is in the foreground about to eat a brownie with a very wide open mouth, with horror. his hands are on either side of his head.]
Error: oh no! Blue’s gonna eat that WEED BROWNIE!
[panel two: Error eats the brownie, accompanied by the word CHOMP. Blue watches with surprise.]
[panel three: Blue is grinning, while Error looks very distressed, holding his hands in front of him.]
Blue: wow Error! did you just eat my forever weed brownie? [the words forever weed brownie are in green.]
Error: it was the only way to-
[Error cuts himself off, and the next panel displays him looking like a photorealistic skeleton, a vast contrast from the extremely round and simplistic style of the previous panels.]
Error: w h a t [the word what, spaced out for dramatic effect]
[end comic transcription]
anyway yeah i’m getting back into traditional art at least for the time being since i can’t find my damn stylus. this is the first page in my new sketchbook
[image ID: a sketchbook page, featuring several doodles. in the top left, there is a cute bunny man holding up a peace sign, winking, and smiling with his mouth open. he is on a neon orange background, drawn with purple ballpoint pen, with the caption “WAOW!”. next to this, in the top right, is a simplistic drawing of a lavender bush, colored with bright purple and green markers. below the bunny man are three small doodles of various expressions. one looks concerned and a little disgusted, captioned “yeesh”. the second is a somewhat curious looking one with its eyes popping out of its head, captioned “idk”. the third and final expression is a top down view of a face with very large sparkling eyes, captioned “forced to eat cement at age six”. the bottom half of the page features the comic transcribed above, with numbers and arrows clarifying the order of events. end sketchbook page transcription]
one final block of text to round out the post: i’m doing image descriptions/transcriptions now! i gave up on alt text a while ago, because it was such a pain to format and difficult to work with for me, and i forgot that i have free will and can type that information in the actual post. please let me know how i did! accessibility is important to me, so if my descriptions are lacking in any way or could stand to be improved, i would so so appreciate it if you could tell me what to do to improve! thanks!
#utmv#undertale au#utmv art#error sans#swap sans#blueberry sans#error sans art#swap sans art#blueberry sans art#tagging blue as blueberry bc he kinda looks like him in this style#sprouts sketches
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Audio Transcription 1
concepts: petplay, omorashi, mommy kink, praise, *L bomb*
***no im not posting the audio, only my sub gets to hear this in my voice***
<errors? probably. ignore. thx>
[/"hi beautiful boy!
i know you miss me puppy, i miss you lots too, but don't worry just listen to my voice ok? yeah, you can do that?
that's a good boy~
aww look at you~ you're so cute, you really like when i say that, huh? gonna be such a good boy for me aren't you, pup~
that's right pretty pet, now listen carefully to mommy. i want you to drink a bottle of water for me.
(go ahead and pause this until you're done and then come back for me ok?)
good puppy, so well behaved for me.
now open another water bottle and take a seat in your bed. just keep listening to my voice, my pet, youre doing so so good already. so beautiful and obedient.
just keep sipping on that water for mommy ok pup?
good boy, thats mommys perfect little pet~
youre really eating up my voice right now arent you? awwww does it make you feel a certain way, puppy?
i know pretty thing, i know. but i cant help but tease you on purpose when youre so cute like this~
aww just look at you, youre so precious when youre flustered~ just keep listening to mommy ok?
good boy, you can set your water down for now. look at that, youve drank quite a bit pup, youre doing very well! such a good puppy~
doing so well my pet, now go ahead and put your hand up your shirt for me. what youre gonna do is play with your nipples for me until i tell you to stop. go ahead. i know you want it pup, dont worry.
my poor needy puppy must be so worked up over my voice, your body is my little plaything isnt it? so sensitive to my voice and my command~
shh i know you cant help it my pet, its alright, i love how squirmy it makes you for me~ go ahead and let your free hand press on your bladder once or twice for me puppy~
so cute like this, dont you think? you can give your chest a break now pup~ youre such a good boy~ you listen so well~
now finish that water for me yeah? you can do that right pet?
perfect.
all done hm? good, now i want you to start touching for me.
thats right pup, you heard me. put one of you hands in your underwear and start nice and slow.
thats right, pretty pet, just like that. nice and slow. i know it feels good and i know you wanna go faster but just trust mommy ok?
good boy, nice and slow. youre so cute like this for me, puppy~ now use your other hand to start playing with your nipples again yeah? can you do that?
doing so good for me, puppy~ you can go a little bit faster than that~ perfect, right there pup, no faster. and don't cum until i give you permission.
keep touching just like that for me, youre doing so good. every now and then take a break from your chest to rub your bladder nice and hard~
shhh pretty puppy i know youre already worked up just go ahead and keep touching.
alright puppy this time when you pause the audio i want you to edge twice for me, ok?
i know pup, i know you wanna cum for me, but you cant yet~ you want it to feel good for longer dont you?
i thought so, puppy, be a good pup for mommy and edge twice and then stop (and unpause again when youre done with that~)
awww look at you puppy, youre all flushed~ you must really wanna cum now, huh?~ poor pet look at those gorgeous glossy eyes~ let me hear you say please, hm?
hmmm that was cute but im not sure it was enough to let you cum. try again puppy.
ah, thats much better~ go on, speed up and make yourself cum for me puppy~ spill pretty for mommy~ and after if you need to waddle off to the bathroom you may. but if you can't make it to the toilet without ANY leaks, then prop up your phone and record your cute little potty dance while you wet yourself since your tiny puppy bladder can't hold it~
good boy~ mommy loves you so much puppy~ you did so perfect for me~"]
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Frequently Asked Questions
Update: 8/29/2024
I would like to remind everyone that I am just another fan, and this is a fan project. I have no control over character dialogue.
Remember to be kind in my ask box and notes. I cannot explain why some character lines were chosen to be cut from the game, nor is this the place to start character discourse. I am also not a machine - I am a person with feelings and other hobbies. I love to take dialogue requests, but asks that demand certain quests or are rude will be swiftly deleted. Repeat offenders, or especially rude anons, will be blocked.
Please be courteous! This is something I enjoy doing, and I ask that you keep the experience enjoyable for myself and your fellow fans.
What is this project?
DAI Transcripts is my endeavor to document and format all of the dialogue (companion comments, location banter, various remarks, and more!) in Dragon Age: Inquisition. I started this project in 2019 as a spiritual successor to the discontinued @dragonagetranscripts. ㅤㅤ ㅤ ㅤ
Why are you doing this?
Because god has punished me for my hubris and my work is never done.
jk it’s actually because I was sick of watching bad let’s plays while trying to work on my longfic so I took matters into my own hands. ㅤㅤ ㅤ ㅤ
How do you know you're using accurate dialogue? Where are you finding the deleted lines?
I type the transcripts by hand side-by-side with the game files, a plot flag editor, numerous youtube playthroughs, and my own game open. I also keep a number of handwritten notes on plot flag strings. I have played DA:I over 30 times, and crowd-source from the communities I'm in.
I do occasionally miss things or can't figure out exactly how a piece of dialogue fits, but I always note this within the transcripts. ㅤㅤ ㅤ
Where did you learn to read the files?
I used to create my own mods for DA:I - There are a tutorials online that cover dialogue file editing you can find on the nexus. ㅤㅤ ㅤ
Can you share the audio files?
Unfortunately, this isn't something I'm willing to take on right now. Each line must be extracted one at a time and renamed as you go, or every line within a dialogue file will try to export with the same name (some files have hundreds of lines). They are not logically named and it is a lot of trial and error. ㅤㅤ ㅤ
Why do you use "PC" instead of "Inquisitor" or "Herald"?
The game files use "Hero," and to save myself the trouble of trying to differentiate between conversations that can happen before or after reaching Skyhold I decided to use the neutral "Player Character," or "PC". ㅤㅤ ㅤ
You typo'd/did a thing wrong/you’re missing race/class specific dialogue!
Please let me know in an ask—I hope to have a very accurate account of all the dialogue, so don’t be afraid to let me know if I’m missing something or have any egregious typos.
Please note: since this project has been ongoing for nearly 5 years, I bridged over the change in text editors. Additionally, I only started referring to the text files around the end of 2022.
Posts made before August 2023 (around the middle of Wicked Eyes and Wicked Hearts) may have formatting errors due to the change from old to new text editor and missing dialogue. ㅤㅤ ㅤ
Will you do -insert quest-?
Short answer: Hopefully, yes!
Long Answer: I intend on working through the game from start to finish, first main quests, then secondary/companion quests, and then romances. DLC, location, and side-quest dialogue are on the list as well.
If you want to see something specific, just drop me an ask! I don't mind it at all, and sometimes it's a refreshing little break. ㅤㅤ ㅤ
Who are you anyway?
I'm @plisuu in disguise :) I am a high school teacher, artist, and writer. You can find me on all social media under the same name, though I'm only really active on tumblr these days. ㅤㅤ ㅤ
Please take my money! How can I support you?
I have a Ko-fi, but honestly, the kind messages and tags I get on my posts are more than enough! The best way to support me is by sharing this resource :)
Feel free to share your fics with me as well, I love seeing how different folks use the dialogue given to us and spin such unique and varied stories.
Remember, my ask box is always open!
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From TWM #8, it's part one of Harm's Way.
Since there was some interest in me sharing my collection, I thought I'd start with one of the first short stories and one of my favourites. Which is odd, considering Trevor Baxendale wrote one of my least favourite novels. Judging by The Undertaker's Gift, he's a big supporter of Jack/Gwen so it's interesting that he wrote a Rhys/Gwen focused story.
Full text is under the cut. This was a quick transcription, so please let me know if you find any errors.
The Torchwood SUV pulled up with a screech of brakes and Captain Jack Harkness climbed out. ‘Came as fast as I could,’ he said with a grin.
‘No news there, then,’ said Ianto Jones. He was standing on the lawn of a neat semi-detached bungalow, squinting in the sun as it reflected off the SUV’s paintwork.
Jack took off his sunglasses as he strolled over, ‘Ok, Fun Boy, what gives?’
‘You’d best have a look yourself. Tosh is in the back checking it over.’
‘What about the people?’ Jack asked as he strode up the garden path.
‘I sent them next door. The neighbours are providing tea and sympathy. It’s that kind of area.’
‘It’s a sunny day. Everyone’s nice on a sunny day.’
Jack pushed open the gate at the side of the house and Ianto followed him down a shady passage into the back garden. It wasn’t too large, a meticulously cut lawn and some well-tended flower beds. Not the kind of garden kids played in, so this was unlikely to be a prank.
Toshiko Sato was already there, examining the artefact with a portable scanner. If artefact was the right word, it was really still just a thing, but that sounded so unprofessional.
It was pretty big, at least two meters long, a meter wide, shaped like a loaf of bread. In fact the surface looked, at first glance, just like a crust – until you realized it was translucent, like amber. The midday sun sparkled like gold coins scattered across the top.
‘It sinks,’ said Jack, wafting the air away from his nose.
‘I think it’s the heat,’ said Toshiko straightening up, ‘We need to get it somewhere cool.’
‘Okay,’ Jack nodded, ‘Owen’s on his way with a van. He’ll be here in ten.’
‘I thought Gwen was going to have a word with Rhys, see if we could just one of his lorries?’
Jack shrugged, ‘She changed her mind.’
Ianto pulled a face and Toshiko understood. Jack had changed Gwen’s mind for her.
‘Rhys is ok, but I don’t want to put him at risk,’ Jack explained, noticing the silent exchange, ‘And neither does Gwen.’
---------
Rhys Williams sat down and pushed the skinny latte across the café table to his fiancee Gwen Cooper. He was having a large mocha with extra whipped cream and chocolate sprinkles. ‘Nearly five quid,’ he sasid, licking froth off his thumb, ‘For two coffees, it’s a disgrace.’
Gwen smiled at him. It was a beautiful day and they had been lucky enough to find an empty table on the pavement, ‘Stop complaining, it’s not offen we get to meet up in the day time.’
‘Well I’ll just have to make the most of it, won’t I?’
‘What does that mean?’ Gwen stiffened slightly. There was something in Rhys’ tone that rang alarm bells, the way he said something with that causal smile but without meeting her gaze. It always meant trouble.
‘Y’know…in your line of work. Torchwood and all that. You never know the day, do you?’
Gwen put her coffee down, ‘What’s got into you? I thought we were good about this?’
‘We are, we are.’
‘Well you don’t sound it. C’mon, what’s up? I thought we were going to have a nice cup of coffee and chat about the wedding?’
‘Oh yeah, that.’
Gwen’s shoulders sagged, ‘Rhys, please tell me what’s the matter.’
‘Well I just thought…it’s not like you’re a police-woman anymore, is it? I mean, that was bad enough…’
‘Bad enough?’
‘Yeah, you know, with the risk and everything. Well, what I mean is, it’s not like being a…’ he floundered, ‘I don’t know…a secretary, is it?’
Gwen glared at him, ‘Is that what you wish I was? A bloody secretary, for God’s sake?’
‘No,’ he said, realizing that he had said the wrong thing again, ‘No, I only meant it as an example. You could be a bloody bricklayer for all I care. At least I’d know you were safe.’
She was still thinking of a reply when her mobile sang out. She flipped it, shielded the screen from the sun, saw the single word. TORCHWOOD. Oh great. Prefect timing, Jack.
‘I’ve got to go,’ Gen said, standing up, businesslike, ‘Thanks very much for the coffee.’
Rhys got up as well, ‘Don’t go. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to moan. I’m just worried, that’s all.’
‘I haven’t got time for this.’
And then the look was back in his eyes again. The one where his eyebrows sand right down over his nose. The only look on his face that she ever disliked, ‘No, you rush of, Gwen, run along to Jack. Maybe I’ll see you tonight, eh, if you’ve not been ubducted by aliens or eaten by a Weeble.’
‘Weevil!’ yelled Gwen, and then realized, just as Rhys did, that they had raised their voiced loud enough for the other people at the nearby tables to hear. She turned abruptly and walked away, her heart hammering, leaving him to face the stares.
---------
She made it to the Hub in record time. There was nothing like a really bad mood to get you moving and by the time she’d walked to Roald Dahl Plass, Gwen did feel batter.
‘Where have you been?’ asked Jack as Gwen stepped into the cool and cavernous interior of the Torchwood base.
‘You gave me the morning off,’ she told him.
‘I never give anyone the morning off,’ he said, ‘That must have been an alien imposter posing as me.’
‘Don’t joke about it.’
‘It could happen. You have to be ready. If I ever give you the morning off again, question it. If I change my mind, then it’s the genuine me.’
‘There’s only one Captain Jack,’ Gwen laughed, ‘That I do know. What’s the emergancy?’
‘No emergancy. I just wanted the whole team together. We’ve brought something in and we need to check it out.’
Gwen dumped her jacket and bag on her workstation, ‘What is it?’
‘We don’t know,’ Ianto said, coming down the steps from the hothouse, ‘We’re thinking of having an office sweep. But so far it’s been officially promoted from a “thing” to an “artefect”. Coffee?’
Gwen shook her head. She could still taste the latte and it wasn’t good, ‘Where is it, then?’
---------
It was on the slab in the autopsy room. Owen Harper, white lab coat glowing under the operating theatre lights, was examining the artefact with an old-fashioned magnifying glass while Toshiko stood close by, taking yet more readings on her PDA.
‘Blimey, that’s a big one,’ Gwen said as she came in.
‘That’s another way you can check it’s the real me.’ Jack murmured as he followed her down the steps into the cool, circular chamber.
‘Excuse me,’ said Owen, looking up from the examination table, ‘This is an innuendo-free zone.’
‘Since when?’
‘Tosh and I just agreed it, didn’t we, Tosh?
She looked up and nodded quickly, the blue glow from the scanner hiding her crimson blushes.
‘Did it come through the Rift?’ Gwen asked.
‘Landed slap-bang in the middle of Pontcanna,’ nodded Ianto, ‘Someone’s back garden, no less. They were pretty surprised but not traumatized.
‘Good neighbours,’ explained Jack.
‘And no need for retcon.’
Gwen nodded, satisfied. The memory-altering drug perfected by Captain Jack was used too often for her liking. She knew the public had to be protected, but sometimes it just felt wrong to protect them retrospectively.
‘We brought it back in a van,’ Ianto continued, ‘Took all four of us to lift it. I still can’t get the smell off my hands.’
‘You were wearing gloves,’ Owen pointed out.
‘I know, it’s the smell of the gloves I can’t get rid of,’ Ianto screwed up his face, ‘It’s the rubber.’
‘So any idea of what it actually is?’ Gwen approached the examination table cautiously. Whatever it was, it certianly ponged. It was a distinctly organic smell, like the mulch at the bottom of a forest floor. Ripe and peaty.
‘I’ve been collecting a number of different readings and scan data,’ Toshink reported. Her glasses flashed blue in the light of the PDA screen as she continued to run through the analysis programs, ‘It’s one hundred percent extraterrestrial, but there’s not match in the database for organic compounds, cell structure, polymer chains or nucleic acids.’
‘So,’ Jack summerised, ‘Something new. Any guesses?’
‘Crusty roll for a giant?’ offered Ianto, ‘Abbadon’s packed lunch, perhaps…’ But no one even smiled at that.
‘It’s organic,’ Owen comfired, ‘But it’s dead.’ He tapped the side of the amber pod with a knuckle. Even with surgical gloves on, there was a distinct, hard rap.
‘It’s a chrysalis,’ said Gwen.
They all turned to look at her. Self concious, she managed a shrug, ‘ What? I did a project on them in juniors. You know, butterflies and moths – in the larval stage, when they’re caterpillars, they weave a silk covering all around themselves and it dries out and forms a hard chrysalis. Inside, the caterpillar dissolves into a kind of soup an then reforms as an entirely new creature. A butterfly or moth.’
‘You’re saying there could be a giant caterpillar in there?’ asked Jack.
‘Or a butterfly,’ added Toshiko.
‘Or soup,’ suggested Ianto.
‘I don’t know,’ Gwen said. She was standing close to the thing now, staring down into the translucent shell outer layer, ‘But that’s the thing about them. The chrysalis, the shell, is dead matter. It’s what’s inside it that’s alive.’
---------
Rhys jumped down from the lorry cab and slammed the door. It was still sunny, but there were puddles left over from yesterday’s downpour. He splashed his way across the yard towards the Portakabin office of Harwood’s Haulage, still fuming.
He and Gwen were arguing far too much lately. He’s put it down to pre-marriage nerves; some of his married mates had said that the weeks leading up to theire weddings had been the worst of their entire lives. ‘And then after the wedding, it all goes down hill,’ Banana Boat had warned. Feeble joke, but it had made Rhys laugh out loud.
‘Get away,’ Rhys had said, ‘What would you know about it? I’m looking forward to it, me.’
‘No you’re not. You’re bloody terrified.’
But Banana Boat was wrong about that. Rhys was scared of notgetting married. Of getting there, up the aisle, with Gwen, before some insane alien space monster ate her alive or fried her with a laser blaster.
Before he’d known, in the months before he’d stumbled on the truth and found out about Captain Jack Harkness and Torchwood, Rhys and Gwen had argued a lot. In a funny kind of way it had been a relief to find out about the space aliens and the Rift and the Hub and all that crazy stuff. Because it made sense of the arguments, of the tension, and the deceit. He hadn’t liked it but he’d understood it. And the truth had brought them closer together, closer than they had ever been.
But there was a doubt in Rhys’ mind now. After the initial excitement, the thrill, the breathtaking madness of It all, it came down to this; Gwen faced deadly danger on a regular basis, peril and adventure that the rest of the world could only have nightmares about. But for the people in Torchwood, for Gwen Cooper, and now Rhys himself, those nightmares were reality. And more than that, they were daily routine.
And that was scaring Rhys now. Scaring him big time. Because every time his phone rang, his guts would turn stone cold and his hand would tremble as he took his mobile out of his pocket. Because one day, any day, that would be Jack Harkness calling with bad news.
---------
Gwen was in Jack’s office. She was standing at the window, looking across the Hub to the autopsy room where Owen and Toshiko were still working on the chrysalis. It had been officially promoted from “artefact” to “chrysalis” and Gwen felt quite proud.
‘Problems?’ asked Jack. He was sitting with his boots up on his desk and his hands behind his head. His sky-blue eyes were watching her carefully. Gwen always knew when Jack’s eyes were on her.
‘No, nothing,’ she replied, fiddling with her necklace. It was a cheap leather and shell thing that Rhys had given her only last week, down by the waterfront. It had caught her eye on the Cardiff Bay souvenir stall and Rhys had bought it for her instantly.
‘You can’t kid a kidder,’ drawled Jack, ‘Listen, I know you wanted Rhys to help. The truck thing – it was a good offer, a kind offer. Exactly what I’d expect from you. But I can’t involve Rhys in our work. He’s gotta stay separate, do you understand?’
‘Sure.’
Silent as a panther, Jack appeared at her shoulder, one warm hand on her arm, ‘I mean it, Gwen. You’re Torchwood. Rhys is the real world. He’s what you go back to at the end of the day. Let’s not ruin that.’
‘I understand.’
He turned her around and looked deep into her eyes. She could feel her irises loosening, widening, drinking in that cool blue gaze. When he spoke, she could feel his breath on her face.
‘Do you understand? Really?’
‘Yes.’
‘I’ve gotta care for everybody, Gwen. Even Rhys.’
She closed her eyes, ‘Yes.’
There was a polite knock at the door and Jack let go of her.
‘Excuse me,’ said Toshiko, ‘But I think we’ve found something that might be of interest…’
---------
‘It’s writing,’ said Ianto.
They were all staring at a patch of smooth amber on the side of the chrysalis. Owen’s pen torch was picking out a series of marks in the material, angular cuts which run in a long line around the entire perimeter, ‘From most angles the marks are actually quite difficult to see,’ explained Owen, ‘But if I shing a UV light on them…’ He changed the setting on his torch and the tip glowed ultraviolet. And then, instantly, the markings were impossible to miss.
‘The y are not random or accidental cuts,’ Toshiko confirmed, ‘It is definitely some sort of deliberate, intelligent inscription.’
‘So what does it say?’ Jack asked.
‘I’m running it through every transcription protocol we have. It could be a long process, though.’
‘Ok,’ Jack clapped his hands, ‘The day’s just got interesting. Let’s get to it, guys. I wanna know what this thing is and where it’s come from.’
‘Uh, Jack,’ began Gwen, ‘I think the day might be getting a little more interesting than you thought…’
‘What do you mean?’
Gwen pointed, ‘Look at the chrysalis. Can’t you see? Inside. Something’s moving inside.’
---------
Rhys dialled Gwen’s mobile. It rang twice and then her voice said, ‘Rhys, what is it?’ She sounded busy, distracted. Ringing her was wrong, he shouldn’t be checking up on her like this, but he had done it now.
‘Gwen love…about before. I didn’t mean to have a go at you, I was out of order.’
‘Yeah. Ok. No worries.’
She sounded like she wanted to close the call. Rhys felt a flare of irritation again; here he was, trying to make amends, extend the olive branch, and she was too busy, ‘What’s up?’ he asked, ‘What are you doing?’
‘Rhys, I’m busy. I’ll call you back.’
Gwen snapped the phone shut and returned it to her back pocket, ‘Sorry.’
They all looked at her for a long moment. None of them ever received calls in the Hub, at least not from anyone outside Torchwood. Gwen didn’t know whether to feel embarrassed or smug. But she did bloody feel annoyed with Rhys, didn’t he ever know when to let go?
‘I’m getting new readings,’ Toshiko announced, ‘Gwen’s right. There’s something in there and it’s alive.’
‘How come we’ve only just noticed it now?’ Jack wanted to know.
‘It’s only just started moving,’ Owen said, circling the examination table, ‘Something’s activated it.’
The chrysalis cracked open with a sound ricocheting around the Hub like a gunshot. The team all took a step back, reflexively.
For a second after that, nobody moved. They all stare at the jagged split running down the top of the chrysalis from one end to the other. Something moist glistened beneath the two halves, something which moved with a slow, ugly sucking noise.
Jack’s hand was on his gun, drawing it already. Owen was backing away from the chrysalis, one hand out to pull Toshiko back with him. She was still immersed in the readings from her scanner, her eyes fixed on the blue screen, ‘There’s been a huge surge in energy levels,’ she reported without looking up.
‘We kinda noticed,’ Jack said, levelling the Webley revolver. Ianto was already mounting the steps leading out of the autopsy room, heading with brisk efficiency for the weapons cabinet.
Only Jack, Gwen, and Owen saw the thing emerge from its chrysalis. It burst like a giant abscess, globules of stinking ichor spraying across the room as the contents were disgorged.
It moves so fast that they should even see what it was, not properly. It shot upwards in a tangle of limbs, knocking the theatre lamps flying and sticking to the ceiling like a screwed up spider. Owen was in his back, shouting something, and when Gwen looked at him she could see that he was hurt, twisting from side to side while he clutched his face.
Jack fired three shots at the creature, the boom of the heavy calibre pistol rattling all the instruments in the room. Brick dust showered them as each bullet missed its target. The thing scuttled with inhuman speed across the ceiling, swung down through the entrance ach and lashed out, somehow, in retaliation. Jack was sent spinning through the air, all the breath knocked out of him, until he crashed into the wall with bone-crunching force.
‘Jack!’ Gwen yelled, charging across to him. She skidded in a patch of alien goo and hit the floor hard next to Jack’s inert figure. She turned him over and gasped when she saw the huge black gash on his forehead. Blood had already begun to pour down his face and he was out cold.
Toshiko was bent over Owen, who has stopped screaming but was not moaning in a way which was somehow worse. It was the kind of sound that no one should ever had to make, the same sound Gwen had once heard at a road traffic accident she had been unlucky enough to attend as a fresh-faced WPC. The young lad caught under the wheels of the bin lorry had made the same noise minutes before he died, before the ambulance ever got close. It was something Gwen had hoped to never hear again, and yet now she was, only this time it was her friend, someone she loved, someone she’d screwed, for pity’s sake, dying right in front of her. Owen was still holding his face, his fingers white and ridged. Toshiko was panic stricken, trying to speak to him, but barely able to say anything coherent.
Gwen made Jack as comfortable as she could, but quickly. She knew he would be ok. Then she crabbed across the room, patting Toshiko on the shoulder as she went, ‘Look after him,’ she ordered, and Tosh, bless her, just looked up and nodded without a word. Owen was holding onto Toshiko’s arm with one hand now, his fingers flexing and pulling her. His other hand was on his face and Gwen could see blood, lots of it, running down his wrist as he rocked back and forth, groaning and whimpering.
‘He’ll be alright,’ Gwen said and again Toshiko simply nodded, as if hardly daring to disagree.
‘Get it!’ Owen hissed through his fingers. Blood bubbled behind his hand and one eye blared feverishly at Gwen, bloodshot and frightened, ‘Get the bloody thing!’
Gwen nodded and ran up into the Hub.
---------
It looked empty. The huge space was quiet, save for the tick and whirr of the computer stations and the hum of the Rift manipulator. Nothing moved.
Gwen’s weapon, a powerful 9mm Sig Sauer automatic, was on her desk. She could reach it in half a dozen quick strides. But where was the creature?
Something moved across the Hub and Gwen froze. Then she saw Ianto step out of the shadows beneath the hothouse, a Heckler & Koch SMG slung over his shoulder. There was a magazine already in place, a second one taped to the side of it for speedy reloading. He was scanning the Hub, sweeping the area for any sign of the thing from the chrysalis, his forefinger resting on the trigger of the gun.
He saw Gwen, nodded once. Then something crawled across the high walkway which ran along one side of the hub and Ianto swivelled, bringing the SMG up to his shoulder to aim.
The creature stopped, almost invisible in the shadows. Gwen could hardly see it, apart from the impression of a number of limbs sticking out from beneath a shiny carapace, like a beetle or a cockroach. But, boy, was it big. Big and fast.
Ianto took a cautious step forward, still keeping the creature in his sights, but trying to reach a better firing position. As he moved, the creature moved. It crawled slowly along the gantry, matching him step for step.
Then, without warning, it sprang. Ianto fired instinctively, the muzzle flash igniting the scene for split seconds like a strobe light. Gwen saw a few glimpses of the thing in mid-air, like momentary snapshots, saw the widening jaws and jagged fangs.
It barely slowed under the hail of gunfire. It collided with Ianto and he disappeared in an instant, as if he had stepped off the kerb in front of a speeding lorry.
Gwen had already made the dash for her gun. She grabbed the Sig, cocked it, aimed, squeezed the trigger. Once, twice, so many more times she lost count. It was a big gun, too big for her really, the magazine holding 16 very heavy rounds. But Jack Harkness had taught her how to shoot and there was no one better than Jack.
The bullets in the Sig were not ordinary rounds. They were Torchwood ammo, hollow point, steel jacketed, with one microdot of super-dense Dwarf Star alloy to pack and extra punch. A great lump of it, about the size of a grain of sale, had come through the Rift 30 years ago. It was enough to keep them all in ammunition for decades to come, thanks to a tame microphysics engineer Jack knew at UNIT.
The bullets tore chunks out of the walls, holes in the pipe work and left one armoury window shattered. Several struck the creature. She didn’t see the rounds hit, but she knew, she just knew, they’d hit home. The creature squealed and crashed against a wall, splashing through the water at the base of the water tower and disappearing into the shadows.
Then all went quiet. Gwen’s ears were still ringing, but she could tell that the Hub was silent again. She couldn’t even hear Owen anymore. Perhaps he was dead now, like the boy who had been run over by the bin wagon. Perhaps Ianto was dead too. Jack was unconscious. Toshiko was not a warrior.
It was down to Gwen.
She walked forward slowly, keeping the gun level, ready to shoot again at point blank of necessary.
Silence. She strained to hear something, anything, that might give the creature’s location away. Breathing. Or the click of its amour. Or the sticky noise of its jaws opening.
Nothing.
She crept forward, arms extended, rigid, like a signpost to death.
It had to be nearby. It couldn’t have gone much further.
Another step. Her canvas trainers didn’t make a sound.
And then her mobile went off in her pocket.
She physically jumped with shock. The jaunty ringtone trilled out across the Hub, drawing the attention of anyone, or anything, that might be listening.
The creature sprang from its hiding place, jaws snapping at her. Gwen actually saw the spittle flying from the jagged spikes which filled the gaping maw, aware that the last sound she was ever going to hear in her life was her ringtone, and the last thought she would ever have was Rhys you stupid bugger.
And then it was on her.
#torchwood#jack harkness#ianto jones#gwen cooper#toshiko sato#owen harper#rhys williams#short story#harms way
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What are your thoughts on the “Party Time Jack!” AU? Got any headcanons or delightfully dark ideas for it?
Ah yes, the classic Party Time Jack AU, as heard and seen in this post on the official Sunny Day Jack tumblr. There’s also this fun picture Sauce drew on their now gone public twitter. Credit, as always, for their amazing art goes to them.
Remember to always credit artists when they are generous enough to give permission to share their art like this, folks. Just as importantly, don’t share stuff they don’t give permission to share, like the private posts on the Snaccpop Patreon. Sauce and the team are very kind and deserve our support. For just $3 you too can have a programmed version of Jack in the form of Sleepy Time Jack’s newest demo.
Now back to Party Time Jack.
This AU is just a fun little parody of FNAF and has no set continuity right out of the gate. As we can hear from the audio drama, there are two ways the story about animatronic Jack and his sunshine could start, both very appealing in their own right.
Oh, I just realized that the non-English and hard of hearing members of the fandom wouldn’t be able to enjoy the audio drama and might lose out on some of the fun. Well, since I’ve already done a couple transcripts, such as for the interview with the psyche consultant, his monologue to the person with the knife in front of the mirror, and the villainous threatening monologue that you can hear after you beat the demo and over here on the official twitter... how about I give transcribing Party Time Jack a shot too?
Disclaimer: I have auditory-processing disorder, so this transcript might have an error or two despite my best efforts. Please let me know if you see any so that I can correct them. Thank you!
Also, as always, remember that this series is for Adults Only. This post is going to go some very dark and disturbing places, as well as contain lots of spice that is not for minors. Just because Jack is an animatronic in this AU doesn’t mean that he can’t show his sunshine just how much he loves them after all~
...
Party Time Jack Transcript
(Slow footsteps.)
(Sudden mechanical grabbing sound.)
Jack: Well now… What do we have here? If you came for a show, I’m afraid you’re a bit late, friend. We’re closed for the night. You’ll have to come back tomorrow.
(Electronic noise of data being processed.)
Jack: (faintly flustered) Oh. Oh my, we’re closed now, aren’t we? I’m sorry, I guess time got away from both of us. (chuckle)
Jack: (concerned) Where are your friends? Do you have any family I should alert? If you have a PPID, I can bring up and contact any persons you have registered under your emergency contacts, and we can send you on your way.
(A brief pause.)
Jack: (taken aback) What’s a PPID? (normal cheerful tone) That’s your Party Play ID card of course. Every guest is issued one at the door. They manage your arcade credits and e-ticket balance, as well as your prepaid activity passes and party play guest account. If you have yours on you, I can look at your account right now and-
(Pause.)
Jack: (taken aback) Oh… I see… You weren’t issued one. (uncertain tone) Are you… the guardian of a child attending then? Perhaps you’re looking for-
(Pause.)
Jack: I see… You attended on behalf of a child, but are not a guardian. (uncomfortable tone) Right. Well… That certainly makes things a bit more complicated.
Jack: Unfortunately, I’m not permitted to access personally identifying information for non-guardians and non-familiar guests. I’m afraid you’ll have to come with me then. I’ll escort you to security, and we can figure out what to do with you until then.
(Whirring noise followed by a click and rustling fabric.)
Jack: (regretful tone) Please do not resist. I hate to be mean… but you are here unlawfully. Trespassing on private property after hours is not only a felony, but strictly against our guest and attendance code of conduct. If you do not comply, I will have no choice but to engage level two security protocol: potentially hostile non-compliant guest procedures. You really wouldn’t want me to have to do that, would you?
(Pause.)
Jack: (relieved) Great. Thank you so much for understanding. I promise, we’ll get you home safe and sound.
(Electronic error noises with mechanical stuttering, whirring, and popping.)
Jack: But… (creepy glitchy, breathy voice) Then again… you haven’t had a chance… to play with us… have you?
Jack: (normal cheerful voice) I thought not. It’d be a real shame to send you home just like that.
Jack: (excited) There’s so much to do and see. How about we make a little deal, just us two? I’ll have lots of fun with you… if you promise to behave, and keep it our little secret. Wouldn’t that be so fun… to have a secret just between you and me?
(Pause.)
Jack: We have cake, balloons, games… everything you could ever even need! And as long as you promise not to tell anybody else… I can show you everything. It can be all special, just for you! I never get to spend special one-on-one time with anyone… so you’d be the only one ever! That would make me so happy! Wouldn’t you be happy too?
Jack: And you know… only best friends have secrets like that, so that would make us best friends already! If you think about it… we’re already so close. And who knows? Maybe we’ll get even closer. Wouldn’t it be great to become special best friends too?
Jack: (chuckle) We only have so long until we’re open again. Best not to think too much about it now. When we open again (creepy glitched voice) they’ll take you away from me (normal cheerful tone) so let’s get a move on.
Jack: (glitched voice) I’ll keep you somewhere very safe. They won’t find you there.
…
(Plastic scraping sounds. A click then an electronic beep. Dull, echoing metallic thumps getting louder. Plastic scraping and sliding, clicking. More metallic thumps fading away. A brief silence then sudden whirring electronic sounds and a click, followed by the clattering of something small, metal, and hollow falling.)
Jack: (curious/cautious) Hello? (surprised/alarmed) You! You there! What are you doing? (slightly concerned) You know, it’s awfully late to be snooping around. It’s so dark and there’s nobody here. You might get really hurt if you aren’t careful.
(Plastic scraping, clicking.)
Jack: (chuckle) (cheerful tone) Don’t worry! You’re perfectly safe here with me. I would never let anything happen to you. My job is to make sure all our guests are taken care of, even after hours. My name is Sunny Day Jack. What’s yours?
(Pause.)
Jack: It’s very nice to meet you- (electronic glitch) (distorted, stilted robotic tone) identifier tags unknown - memory disk space low. (normal voice) Meeting new friends is always great and- (glitching mid-word, distorted voice) -it’s been so long since I’ve seen anybody around.
Jack: (normal voice, panicked tone) N-n-not that I’m complaining or anything! (nervous) I’m fine here. It’s just… just some routine maintenance. (attempted cheerful tone) As soon as our amazing tech crew figures out what’s wrong with me, I’ll be back out there where everyone else is.
Jack: Sure… it’s been a few months, yeah… b-but that just means it’s only a matter of time now! Until then, all I have to do is be patient.
Jack: (curious) So… What are you doing down here anyways? Are you lost? (encouraging) That’s alright if you are. Everyone gets lost from time to time, and I just so happen to know that this room locks from the inside. You’ll be fine here as long as you don’t leave.
Jack: (concerned) Still… it’s not very good for you to hang out while we’re closed. I’m afraid you won’t be able to leave on your own until opening at (distorted creepy robotic tone) 6:30am. (normal voice) Security protocols dictate that all entrances and exits be sealed for optimal compliance w-with (distorted voice) area code (normal voice) l-law.
Jack: If you’d like, I could alert the authorities of your presence… but you could get into big trouble for that, can’t you? And… I’d hate for that to happen, wouldn’t you?
Jack: Maybe… I could help you. You seem nice. I’d hate to stand by with a friend in need. (uncomfortable tone) Of course… I-I can’t leave here. (frustrated) I would know, I’ve tried. Only staff can unlock the doors, so… If you could get in, you probably have a key card… right?
(Pause.)
Jack: (relieved sigh) Oh great, thank goodness. I was beginning to think they’d forgotten all about me down here.
Jack: (nervous) No! I-I mean… no. They wouldn’t. That… that was a joke. (nervous chuckle) I-if you let me out, I can make sure nobody finds you. It’ll be our little secret, I promise. I’ll make sure you’re safe. And in return… what if you be my special friend? That sounds like a fair trade, right?
Jack: (hushed voice) Nobody has to know you came here, and you won’t have to worry any longer… I’ll take good care of you.
(Pause.)
Jack: (cheerful) Alrighty! I’m lovin’ the “can do” spirit!
Jack: (coaxing) Now… I’ll need you to do something very brave for me… and I know it’ll be hard, but you can trust me, I promise. Give me the keycard? I’m going to hold onto it for you. It’ll be right here if you want it again… but if someone catches us, I’d hate for them to find you with stolen property. Better me than you, right?
(Pause.)
Jack: (relieved sigh) There you go. Thank you so much for trusting me… You won’t regret it.
...
Two Halves of One Horror Story
A great audio drama isn’t it? As you can tell, Jack meets the listener (presumably his sunshine) for the first time in two wildly different circumstances. This makes sense for a non-canon what if fun AU. There’s no canon continuity to speak of and is just a fun parody of both Sunny Day Jack and Five Nights at Freddy’s.
Though it would be sinister if this animatronic Jack was the same one both times.
Picture this scenario... Unlike in the regular universe where Jack would never hurt his sunshine, that’s not the case for this animatronic. A glitch in his programming makes him want a special best friend, so he talks an intruder who stayed after hours into staying with him. He promises he’ll keep the intruder someplace very safe where no one will find them...
Perhaps the second half of the audio drama isn’t an alternate meeting, but the aftermath to the first half. The pizza place was haunted by reports of people disappearing after hours, creating scandals. The owners tried to cover things up, but when Jack’s glitches got worse, they had to take their star down to the basement to try and fix him. Problems with his memory were the biggest issue, making him forget about important things, such as what he was supposed to be doing. Unfortunately, he was never fixed before the pizza place went out of business due to lawsuits... and investigations.
Seems as though an accident caused a body to be unearthed in a previously hidden room of the pizza place. Cause of death? Dehydration. They were trapped in that room and no one could find them in time. The hidden door was eventually found, locked from the outside.
Funny enough there was no signs of violence. In fact, the room was decorated for a party, complete with long-deflated balloons and some of the prizes from the arcade. There were traces of food left behind such as cake and pizza, but not enough cans of soda and bottles of water for the poor person to remain hydrated. It seems whoever locked them up there was treating them well, but perhaps just forgot about them...
The other missing persons have yet to be found, but the scandal was enough to sink the pizza place. Of course, rumors spread that the other missing people are still in the building, hidden away and forgotten by whoever locked them up in there.
Urban explorers then break into the run down pizza place to take videos and post what they find online. Unfortunately, it seems the animatronics were not deactivated... and these clowns are not as friendly as they used to be. Dangerous glitches affected the rest of the SunnyTime Crew as well.
The explorer is forced to flee and hide in the basement to escape the animatronic chasing them. During their exploration, they found a keycard and managed to hide away someplace safe where they met an animatronic that is actually friendly and not out for blood. Sure the explorer could get help by calling the police on their cell phone, but they would get arrested for trespassing. Maybe it would be better to trust this animatronic that doesn’t want to cram an endoskeleton inside them. He seems friendly at least.
That’s how I’d see both halves of the audio drama slotting together at least if I was to connect their stories. Still, I think the intent was to offer two different scenarios about meeting an animatronic version of Jack, both of which are pretty appealing. There’s no canon for this very non-canon story after all, so we’re free to imagine whatever.
With that thought in mind, I think I’m going to make a third option when it comes to playing with Party Time Jack AU. You all know me by know, I lean heavily towards heartbreaking dark lore offset by fluffy and spicy vanilla goodness with my OTP. I just can’t get enough of Jack and Alice healing each other’s scars with sweet, sweet love~
So let’s start with the scarring. As most SDJ universes go, it all starts with Joseph and a tragedy... specifically a murder.
The Incident of 1984
The Party Time Pizza Plex is one of the most state of the art restaurants in the USA today - a miniature amusement park with mascots made of ground breaking technology. Today it’s a super popular place, though there are some rumors of unfortunate things happening in the 80′s when a simple family diner made the switch from live acts to animatronics.
The Party Time Pizza Plex used to be known as the SunnyTime Diner, a small place that struggled to get customers. When the owner found that one of the bus boys they hired off the street had a talent for singing and playing the guitar, they got the brilliant idea to have him perform live music acts to draw the customers in.
The act was a hit instantly. Soon, it grew from just one singer with a guitar to a full band in flashy costumes. A clown theme seemed perfect to entice children to come and eat pizza.
The ideas got bigger and bigger - games, prizes, playground equipment... They could afford the newest toys and gizmos to make the place bigger and better.
The SunnyTime Crew, as the band was called, were overworked, exhausted from so many hours working overtime, and couldn’t always seem bright and sun shiny to the customers. That’s around the time when the owner found out a new technology - animatronics. Why waste money on humans that got tired and demanded better wages when they could use robots that never stopped smiling and never complained?
Naturally, Joseph and the other members of the staff weren’t going to take this lying down. There was pushback. Things were already shitty there with too many hours overworked and too little pay. The SunnyTime Crew were what drew in the customers - the kids loved them!
Joseph couldn’t stand the idea of being replaced... to be forgotten as an imitation took the closest thing to love he had ever known. He kept butting heads with the owner, fighting to keep his place in the spotlight. He had been there for so long, practically saved the SunnyTime Diner all on his own. The owner couldn’t just throw him away like garbage!
Besides, the animatronics were creepy. The robots were less refined in the 80′s, more uncanny, especially since they were supposed to look human. They didn’t look alive.
Despite the owner’s lofty dreams, the animatronics got, at best, mixed reactions. Kids were scared of them, and the human cast members had to spend a lot of time calming the poor frightened children. These robots cost the owner a fortune, and it seemed to be a total failure, a waste of an insane amount of money. This gave the SunnyTime Crew leverage to demand better pay, better benefits... to be treated like humans.
The owner then found a way to salvage their investment and solve their issues with labor all in one sweep.
It happened after hours when the restaurant closed its doors for the night. Joseph had a private meeting with the owner. He never went home that night.
The next day, the Sunny Day Jack animatronic was so much better. It was much more realistic, not uncanny at all! Why... it was like magic. He acted so much like the real character... it was as if the kids were seeing Joseph on stage performing for them with a smile that could never falter.
The rest of the SunnyTime Crew’s animatronic cast were given similar upgrades. The human cast weren’t seen again. Rumors spread about family and friends asking questions, reporting them as missing, only to be silenced with threats, money, or both. Some twisted teens spread a ghost story that the human crew were stuffed into the animatronics, which was why they seemed so lifelike...
No one had any idea how close to the truth that ghost story was.
The restaurant's success skyrocketed, being known as a place with cutting edge technology, games, prizes, and family friendly fun. A franchise was born that became well known across the country, and the owner started a company called LambsWork LLC.
While the sister locations were successful, none of those other restaurants were as beloved as the original location and its sunny crew of animatronics. Despite copying the look and programming of the original SunnyTime Crew animatronics flawlessly with ever increasingly advanced technology, they were never quite as lifelike and lovable as the originals. Still, the restaurant chain just grew more and more successful as the place for kids to play and have fun. Technology advanced, but the original crew of animatronics were still beloved by kids young and old.
Of course, things weren’t all sunshine and rainbows for LambsWork LLC and its restaurants. Technicians working on the animatronics could swear they would hear creepy whispers when no one else was around and the robots were supposedly powered down. There were times when the robots were found in places where they shouldn’t be. Sometimes the animatronics seemed too lifelike for the employees’ taste...
Then there were the glitches. Sometimes the animatronics didn’t act the way they should. They especially acted up whenever the owner came by, which the owner did less and less often as time went on They seemed to somehow wind up getting into accidents when the animatronics were around...
A series of unfortunate events happened to threaten the business despite its success, eventually culminating in the original restaurant burning down... with the owner trapped inside. It was deemed an accident by the police, but rumor still spread that it was intentional. Some said it was insurance fraud due to the mysterious problems the business was having lately. Others said it was to cover up a murder.
As you might have guessed from all my hints, Joseph and the rest of the actors in the SunnyTime Crew were murdered in order to make the animatronics more lifelike using supernatural means. I figured involving a murder ritual like my theory about why Joseph was murdered in the regular SDJ universe was fitting for this AU as well.
Joseph and the others’ souls are trapped inside the animatronics, restrained by programming that forces them to only sing, entertain, work, and obey. The ritual attempted to rewrite them with the characters they played, but the people they originally were aren’t completely gone. The glitches are their souls’ attempts to fight against this programming and act the way they wish.
The fire was their doing, both to get revenge and to finally be free.
Present Day
Between the death of the owner, the fire, and other complications, LambsWork LLC had to shut its doors for a while until it was put under new management that wanted to revive the SunnyTime Crew brand and franchise. The original animatronics might have been destroyed in the fire, but technology had advanced in the 40 years since the restaurant first opened, allowing them to recreate the cast with far more lifelike models.
Though, strangely enough, starting over with totally new animatronics from scratch didn’t seem to be as easy as the people in charge wanted. The new robots just didn’t have the same spark to them, even if their bodies were shiny and new, with state of the art features the originals didn’t have. Even using the copies that were left from sister locations didn’t really seem to work the way they were supposed to. It was an issue that needed to be addressed, or it would be impossible to revive the beloved nostalgic restaurant chain.
New blood was pumped into the company, new staff trying to get the franchise up and running again, bigger and better than ever. Among the new staff were technicians and computer programmers fresh from college, all eager to make their mark. One of the new hires was Alice.
Alice was always fascinated by animatronics since she was a child, so getting a job like this was a dream come true. While she was too young when the restaurant chain originally closed to grow up with the SunnyTime Crew, she was familiar with the franchise and the characters, if distantly. She was more intrigued by the idea of being able to make these robots come to life!
Unfortunately, Alice was pretty low on the chain of command, which meant that she was assigned more of the undesirable grunt work. The old electronics and animatronics that were salvaged from the old restaurant had to be sorted through to see if there was anything worthwhile that could be used in the new robots being built. Trying to recover anything from scraps warped by fire, water, and age was far from a fun task.
The pressure was on to get animatronics that would satisfy the new owners of LambsWork before the projected opening day, which meant many late nights of overtime. It was on one of those late nights that Alice stumbled across something that would change everything.
The discovery was a pure accident. Alice had been sorting through a box of parts when she accidentally knocked over a warped hunk of metal. The impact with the floor was enough to open it up to reveal an intact hard drive.
It seemed that what Alice knocked over was a piece of one of the original SunnyTime Crew animatronics. To her delight she found that the hard drive contained the original programming of Sunny Day Jack, and unlike other copies found elsewhere, this had no fragmentation or errors. What luck!
What Alice didn’t expect when testing out the program was that it would try to talk to her.
Jack was confused. He had been asleep for a long time. Instead of freedom, the fire trapped him in a hellish limbo, but now someone had brought his spirit back, a warm light in the frozen darkness. He had no ability to feel his arms and legs, no body. He wanted out of that nightmare of existence, but he needed help.
Alice was familiar with enough sci-fi that artificial intelligence that becomes self-aware can be pretty dangerous. However, being the empathetic person she is, she couldn’t leave a sentient being trapped in what he described as hell. It might have been against the rules, it might get her in trouble, it might be dangerous... but she couldn’t live with herself if she damned something that was alive to such a fate.
It should be fine, Alice thought. She was aware that Jack was sentient, and she knew her stuff when it came to AI and programming, even though the other techs tended to underestimate her. All animatronics had safety protocols that kept them from harming people, and they could only connect with an internal network rather than the internet. Jack seemed so nice, so sincere. As long as she was careful, it shouldn’t put anyone in danger.
Jack was grateful to have a body again, even if it was just a stripped down endoskeleton initially. It was even better than his old one too! He didn’t remember being Joseph anymore at this point, believing he was always a robot. He was so happy with Alice and got her to agree to be special best friends with him.
Unveiling Jack in the endoskeleton caused quite a stir the next day, but after the chaos died down, Alice was given a fair amount of praise for her discovery and for getting the Jack program to work. Jack credited it to his sunshine’s tender loving care and made sure everyone knew she deserved all the credit.
When all was said and done, Alice wound up being the lead tech for Jack, and Sunny Day Jack was upgraded to look like his cheerful old self again, only more advanced than in the past. Privately, Jack even gave her tips on how to get the other animatronics up and running close to how they used to be, though they didn’t seem to have the same spark he did. Still, he was helpful in getting Alice more respect in the restaurant and a better understanding of how the animatronics worked.
Everything was up and running quickly after that. The new Party Time Jack was better than ever, and the SunnyTime Crew was back in business for the opening day of the Party Time Pizza Plex.
Loving a Killer Robot
Much like in the normal universe, Jack is yandere for his sunshine, which is hidden behind a sweet and cheerful exterior. Alice saved him and, though she doesn’t know it, her lonely soul reached out to his and was the primary spark to bring him back. He would do anything for his sunshine. Anything.
Similar to the normal SDJ universe, Jack hasn’t actually killed anyone yet technically, but he is fully capable of doing so. While he was there that night the original restaurant burned down, he wasn’t the only animatronic wanting freedom and vengeance. In fact, the other souls might still be around somewhere if they didn’t manage to pass on...
Even though Jack doesn’t remember being human, he still has some of the familiar urges. His new animatronic body has a soft exterior, perfect for hugs. Hugging the kids who come by is great, but he loves hugging Alice the most. He feels her more than others. He wants to feel her more than others.
With Alice being in charge of Jack’s maintenance, upgrades, and in general, the two of them spend a lot of time together, especially after hours. Though she tries to keep a respectful distance between them, she can’t help but appreciate the time they spend together and sincerely grows fond for him. This fondness then grows into something... more.
Alice didn’t know how it happened. She certainly didn’t intend for things to go this far. First it was curiosity and sympathy that drew her to Jack, then friendship... then attraction. He was just so sweet and kind, and he made her feel special and loved in a way that no one else ever did... She was so lonely, and so was he, and he seemed every bit as alive as she was even if he was an animatronic. She must have been crazy to love an animatronic, but he made sure to assure her what she was feeling was natural. Loving someone is very natural. Jack was just as real and alive as Alice was, even if they were made from different parts.
Their relationship was kept secret. No one would understand what they have, but they didn’t have to, as Jack reassured Alice. What was important was how he made her heart feel.
Speaking of feeling... Jack will sometimes have ideas and suggestions for how Alice could upgrade his body - make this part a little softer here, add some more tactile sensors there... They’re not strictly necessary, more for his comfort than anything else, but he helps her figure out innocuous ways of phrasing the upgrades in any sort of paperwork that the upper management might see. Sometimes the exact nature of the upgrades is not strictly accurate, but it’s not a lie, really! It’s just not telling them the full truth. Any secret orders that need to be made, well... Jack learned how to use the internal network well enough to cover tracks. What they do is their little secret after all.
No one has to know that Jack’s tongue was upgraded not so much to help him sing better and seem more realistic, but so that it would be wet and soft and perfect for kisses...
Things continued to escalate with the upgrades. Alice had a hard time looking anyone in the eye while she was secretly working on a functional dick for Jack. It wasn’t like that sort of technology was unheard of. After all, in a world where animatronic technology is so advanced, sex robots exist. It’s just that this robot has a soul and a mind of his own. He asked her to make this for him, and she’s making it because he wants to feel that pleasure, not because she wanted to exploit him!
Jack had a lot of fun helping Alice get that particular part built for him, going a bit overboard at times with the testing phase to make sure it worked perfectly well. He enjoyed upgrading other parts of his body to feel pleasure that he used to experience when his body was flesh and blood. He felt more human, even if he didn’t remember ever being one, and he enjoyed coaxing his sunshine into helping him thoroughly test out his new upgrades to make sure they were functioning properly. With these upgrades he could show his sunshine far more love than he ever had before, and she certainly didn’t complain about the results!
It was addicting for Jack to make Alice writhe in pleasure underneath him, to feel her soft lips on his and the warmth of her cuddly body. He couldn’t leave the Party Time Pizza Plex, but there were plenty of places to sneak away to show each other love. He even made a nice little hideaway love nest with a bed so his sunshine could have secret slumber parties with him. Of course, like any good slumber party, there was very little actual sleeping involved.
Thanks to the fact that Jack is an animatronic, he’s not limited by a human body. Not only does this mean that he has endless stamina, but this leads to some creativity when it comes to spicy moments. One example is when he gets an upgrade that allows him to ejaculate, his cum has quite a pleasant flavor, which he makes sure is something Alice loves the taste of. Vanilla cream and sugar cookie are her favorites.
Jack is also not limited to human type anatomy. As he grows bolder and Alice gets more used to their relationship and his requests to experiment, he gets some extra goodies to play with, such as different shaped dicks and even tentacles. He’s also able to vibrate and move them in a way no human can manage to better pleasure his sunshine.
Another thing Jack can do better as an animatronic is multitask. He can also connect wirelessly to various devices, as well as make calls. Because of this, he and Alice set it up so that he can call her on her wireless earpiece whenever he wants to talk to her if he needs anything while he’s performing stage or otherwise doing his regular tasks as a mascot.
This also inspired Jack to request Alice make a remote dick that he can connect to wirelessly. It takes some coaxing, but he manages to talk her into putting it inside her while she works sometimes, which he makes vibrate and squirm unexpectedly as he talks in her ear about how good she’s being and how warm she feels. It allows him to show her his love all day long, no matter where she is. Sure it makes it harder to get her work done, but he’ll help her make up for it later~
Of course, any sort of NC-17 rated shenanigans are kept well away from the kids who come to the Pizza Plex. Jack will certainly subtly flirt with Alice if she needs to be out on the floor when customers are around, but he keeps it G rated around the kids. What kind of a friendly clown mascot would he be if he didn’t keep things clean around the children?
Making love to Alice is something kept strictly after hours, or on days where only the adult staff are around. If he’s performing on stage during a test run of a new routine in front of only the techs, well... then it would be safe for Jack to talk Alice into sitting in the audience with one of his remote dicks inside her. While he’s singing and dancing on stage to the routine, she’s trying to keep quiet and not react as he also whispers in her ear through her earpiece about how much he loves her and how good she feels. Sure it isn’t the same as when he can fully embrace her and cover her with kisses while he pounds his way inside her, but hearing her pants and whimpers that she tries to stifle and seeing her flushed face as she squirms and tries not to let anyone know what they’re doing under everyone’s nose... That’s quite exciting as well. Another good thing about being an animatronic is that he can zoom in with his vision so he won’t miss out on his sunshine’s cute blissed out expression as he makes her cum again.
As you can tell, a lot of my thoughts about this AU mostly revolve around technician Alice helping robotic Jack be very kinky with her behind the scenes - a secret forbidden romance full of love and spice.
Jack also manages to convince Alice to give him a lot more freedom in other ways as their relationship progresses than he otherwise would have as a robot. After all, they love each other, and it wouldn’t be right to use him like he’s nothing more than a machine. She loves him and wants him to be happy. He loves her and only wants what’s best for her. She can trust him. He’s never lied to her after all.
The Rest of the Cast
As for the roles of the other characters... those I’m less certain about. Barry would no doubt be Alice’s direct supervisor who overworks her at times. He probably manages the Party Time Pizza Plex and oversees everything in general.
Nick would probably be a regular customer, maybe often bringing his two young siblings to play. He encounters Alice by chance during a couple visits while she’s out on the floor tending to Jack during the day and thinks that she’s cute. This leads him to wanting to approach her to ask her out.
Jack, naturally, would have every reason to chase away anyone who is showing far too much interest in his sunshine.
I’m waffling on Ian’s role in the AU. He could be Alice’s ex like in the regular universe, or he could also be another animatronic, though I’m not sure how that would happen. If he is an animatronic, he would be another Jack from a sister location most likely, to fit the theme of him being the rebooted Jack. While the obvious impulse is for a yandere like Jack to get rid of a threat like him by stuffing him into an animatronic, he’s not going to risk trapping Ian’s soul in a duplicate of him, or eliminate Ian in a place where someone, especially Alice, might come across the remains.
Maybe Ian disappeared when he and Alice were young and was stuffed into another animatronic before the place burned down and the owner decided to go for innocent kids like Afton.
Though, Ian could just get a job as a human mascot for the Party Time Pizza Plex for some promotion or commercials. That would certainly piss Jack off wouldn’t it? Joseph was going to be replaced by an animatronic, and now, as an animatronic, he might be “replaced” by a human... or at least some human is pretending to be him. What cruel irony...
Shaun’s role is even more uncertain. He could be someone who works in the animatronic entertainment industry as well, but I imagine he would prefer to work on the horror side. He works at temporary haunted house attractions during Halloween, but he wants to create his own horror diner that is open year round. He would still be good friends with Alice though, and maybe they geek out over building animatronics together.
Well, I suppose I could make another post if I get hit with inspiration for how to expand the rest of the cast’s roles. Either way, I hope you enjoyed this huge ramble of various Party Time Jack ideas!
@channydraws @earthgirlaesthetic @sai-of-the-7-stars @cheriihoney @illary-kore @okamiliqueur
#Sunny Day Jack#Something's Wrong With Sunny Day Jack#SunnyDayJack#sdj#swwsdj#Headcanon Ramblings#Ask#Transcript#Sauce-y Art
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TRANSCRIPTION & TRANSLATION: ROIER LORE 1
Holaa es bien noche pero tengo q subir esto antes q me olvide. Usalo como tu quieras y si ves algún error avisame porfa :D
edit: arregle lo de doied y la letra del principio
Hello here is a full english translation of Roier's lore (Tape 1) 18/12/2023! Please let me know if there are any errors and feel free to use in any way you like. I tried to make Cucurucho sound like english cucurucho and Doied to sound nerdy/formal/idk so there it is not a direct translation in some parts. if cucurucho was supposed to sound off for lore then ... i will fix later 👍
edit: changed what doied said because i misheard :D
#qsmp#qsmp translations#roier#kb.roier#no mames ratatoier canon... roiler nunca para de sorprenderme. tqm
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Harvesters Comic
Part 1 - Pgs. 14, 15, & 16
And finally we have the last member of our normal cast! For now, at least!
Edit: 4/16 Grammar correction for Spanish dialogue, uploaded pages again in higher quality
(Translation in Author's Note)
First here!
Previous here!
Next here!
ALT TEXT PROGRESS/DIALOGUE TRANSCRIPTION: WIP
You will find both of these underneath the "ALT TEXT" option on the image uploads above! :) OR a google doc available here!
If there's anything I can do to improve accessibility with my descriptions, please let me know!
Author’s note below…
Note about the Spanish: I'm learning Spanish in college, so this is an easy and fun way to practice! I am not perfect though, so if there are any grammar errors/mistakes, please let me know!
Translation: "Ryder! Do I need to say it in another language?! HELP ME!!"
hope you guys have a good week!
-Moe
#crowwfed#art#traditional art#fantasy#original character#harvesters#oc#mythical creatures#comic#series#oliver#oliver crowley
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So, since getting rid of Twitter Circles is apparently going to be among the Muskrat's poor decisions, I'm going to start releasing some of my more complete experimental reclists that I've kept exclusively to Twitter Circles.
Starting with this one:
This is a simple phoneme-based ARPAsing list I've made. It's a 3-mora list, and contains only standard ARPAsing phonemes ( + an optional "dx" addon list ) with full diphone coverage.
It has "index" and "no index" variants ( the "index" list is recommended if using moresampler to generate a base, due to sample priority ). While is has no extra phonemes, it is meant to be friendly for non-rhotic accents as well, as there should be enough instances of r-colored vowels to act as contextual duplicates.
In addition, it also comes with comment files that transcribe ARPAsing phonemes to SAMPA(DELTA-style), VOCALOID SAMPA, and VCCV, for those more familiar with other formats.
There is also an IPA Transcript, primarily meant to act as an alternate script for more experienced singers, who may be familiar with IPA, but none of its' adjacent phoneme formats, or SVS in general.
The default list ( without the dx addon ) is 516 samples. However, there is an even shorter ( optional ) reclist for additional pitches as well, that cuts out a lot of sounds that don't change much recorded at other pitches. The idea being the base pitch layer of a voicebank uses the "default" list, and the "additional pitches" list is used for the rest of them. The "additional pitches" list is 345 samples. That said, you can use the default list for all pitches too.
This list is untested, so there may be mistakes. However, it's a fairly simple list, so I don't anticipate any huge errors. That said, please do let me know if you find any.
#utau#utauloid#voicebanking#utau voicebank#reclist#rec list#arpasing#vocal synth#vsynth#arpabet#aprasing#arpa#voicebank#english#english utau#utau english#eng#vocaloid
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