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#please just fucking hire me
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I think job hunting is my least favorite thing in the world
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nyxronomicon · 7 months
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But Endeavor, whose only been a perfunctory fucker now eating pussy, your pussy, for the first time and he just does the messiest job of it. Just down there exploring every fold with his fat fingers- hearts in his eyes and juice in his chin
ANON... 🥴🥴🥴 please you are so right all he knows is breeding... (RIP don't look at me) he's gotta learn how to eat someone out sometime...
Endeavor x gn!reader (w vagina) cw: messy messy oral, fingering (thick fingers...), rough, overstim, reader squirts pet names: baby
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"Higher- ah!" Your sharp moan told him that he found the right spot, his tongue flicking your clit. He was clumsy and awkward, like he didn't quite know how to move his mouth now that he'd found your sweet spot. Your fingers slid into his hair as his lips wrapped around your bundle of nerves.
You briefly looked at him, seeing his piercing blue eyes gazing back at you. There was a dusting of pink on his cheeks, uncertainty seeping onto his features. You wanted to tell him how adorable it was, how much you were in love with this version of Enji Todoroki. But you knew better, he wouldn't take that compliment well. He'd get hyper masculine, pin you down before getting rough and pounding his heavy cock into you.
He tried to pull away out of insecurity, but you tugged his hair with just enough force to keep him between your thighs. "Want you right here." You held him in place, seeing his eyes widen slightly and the flush of his cheeks become a deeper red.
The bashful expression lasted less than a moment, his eyes flickering closed as he sucked your clit. When he opened them again, they were full of determination. Enji suddenly pulled your hips closer to the edge of the bed to get a better angle. You felt his thick fingers dance between your folds, throwing your head back as he teased you.
"Enji," you moaned his name, arching your back as a finger pushed into you. Your cunt practically sucked him in, and he groaned as he imagined his throbbing cock getting the same treatment.
There was a glisten of sweat clinging to your skin. Your fingernails dug into his scalp as he sucked your clit hard, flicking at the bud with his tongue as his finger searched your pussy for your g-spot. A second finger pushed into you, your core throbbing for more. You threw your head back, losing control of your body as you could feel pleasure creeping up your spine.
You were so fucking sexy. He needed to taste your cum on his lips. It was all he could think as his fingers pressed your g-spot, instantly pulling lewd sounds from your lips. He smirked, his tongue now only lightly swirling around your clit as he focused on finger-fucking you. You were close, he could tell from the way you tightened around him.
"That's it, baby." He growled into your pussy, "cum for me." With another rough suck on your bundle of nerves, he prodded your g-spot relentlessly. His blue eyes were trained on you, watching every minute change as your breath hitched.
Your cunt tipped over the edge with ecstasy, Enji holding you in place as he continued his ministrations. It quickly spread through your whole body, thighs twitching as you felt yourself getting oversensitive. You mumbled his name, writhing in his grip as you rode out the orgasm.
"Just a lil' more..." He continued, "c'mon baby," his motions intensified, sensitivity instantly sending a more intense wave of pleasure through you. You could feel yourself squirt into his mouth, almost embarrassing had he not immediately started licking the essence from your folds.
He cleaned you out like a starved man, slowly and gently letting you come down from your high. He continued to watch you with adoration in his gaze, his cock throbbing with desire. When he finally pulled away from your cunt, you saw his smirk drenched in your juices.
"How was that?" He spoke quietly, but with confidence. Your expression and the fact that you were still catching your breath told him the answer.
"Not bad for a first timer." You chuckled through heavy breaths.
"Oh?" He climbed on top of you with a grin, pinning your arms above your head. "How 'bout I show you my expertise?"
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@rottiens if I have to brainrot about this man you do too
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steviesbicrisis · 2 years
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First and last episode of Silvia uses her degree on tumblr:
✨ Steve's house is ugly as fuck ✨
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You might see this picture and think "what are you on about? it's not so bad!!" and I would agree with you, since the pool, the lights and the huge windows on the ground floor are doing the most at making this house look very nice and expensive.
But then, I saw this
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this is the front of the house... THE FRONT OF THE HOUSE! THIS FLAT MF WITH THE MOST BASIC ASS WINDOWS IS SUPPOSED TO BE THE FIRST THING EVERYONE SEES???
And like, I know this is season 1, they were on a budget and this house isn't as important as the Wheelers or the Byers but I have an hyperfixation on Steve Harrington so I simply cannot let this one slide.
There are a lot of things that bother me about this house: the flatness of this entrance (seriously, never heard of a porch???), those boring windows, the fact that the house is basic but then you have that expensive-looking front door and those huge windows in front of the pool?? it seems as if they merged two houses together???
Now, I know we all joke about Steve having a lot of spare bedrooms but like, this house is huge???
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LOOK AT THIS? is this really a suitable home for three people? You could fit all Hawkins after the earthquake in here, jc. They actually do have 400 spare bedrooms.
But then I realized, half of this is actually empty.
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This is the best part of the house, let's be fucking honest. Finally some rich features in here. But also, this means that half the house doesn't have a second floor but just a huge living space on the ground floor with a double high which is very rich of you Harringtons, wasting half of the second floor just for the sake of aesthetic.
(Also, that exposed wood roof is gorgeous but the color... meh.)
At this point you might think that this house isn't actually that bad.. let me remind you that this house contains this room:
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I rest my case.
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parentsbesluts · 4 months
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at the end of the day i think the main problem with the current era of sasi is that thomas just. isnt a writer. hes not practiced enough to write efficiently (which is a major reason why the finale script isnt done) and hes not well-versed enough to communicate subtle references, parallels, and nuance through words. he does all of that through his acting. hes an actor and singer above all else. and theres nothing wrong with that inherently except for the part where he overestimates his own abilities and goes well! im sure i can complete the script this 4 part season finale where multiple plot lines and character arcs converge in complicated and ugly ways in a year. whats the worst that could happen
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freshmangojuice · 4 months
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the only secondary character I want to come back for the new Red Dwarf special is SPANNERS
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kiok0r0 · 4 months
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"Hey Kioko, how's the new job?"
I now understand why people advocate so strongly for universal healthcare. Insurance is such bullshit. But aside from that. This is a terrible job.
"It's only been two weeks. What's going on?"
Okay.
So I didn't think this through.
More under because the rant's long
This job I'm at is at a clinic. They're open three and a half days each week, it's typically 30 hours per week. I've got no experience or knowledge of medical terminology and medical computer programs. I admitted this in the interview we had. I was way too over the moon when they IMMEDIATELY HIRED ME AFTER ONE INTERVIEW. Why do I know they immediately hired me? They sent me forms that jobs normally send after someone gets hired. That should have been, you know, two red flags. But again, they wanted me to come in for a work interview, so I thought maybe they wanted my paperwork beforehand so I can do the work interview.
No, I literally missed the signs. I mean, I thought it was weird but I sort of thought they were super eager. And then after that work interview, they asked how soon I could start.
"I want to at least do my two weeks at my other jobs." Since, to be honest, while I hated one of the jobs, the managers at both places have been super kind.
"Can you ask if it's possible to leave earlier?" The doctor asks without hesitation.
Also another thing to say, I don't have a lot of work experience. I've been hired on the spot for one of my other jobs and didn't have a job at the time so I didn't really need to do a two week notice. But a two week notice is a courtesy. And again, while I didn't like the job, I really liked the managers. They have been patient and flexible with me and didn't pressure me to do things I couldn't do. So I felt rushed and slightly offended. But I brushed it off. Maybe they just thought I would be a good fit for the position and really wanted me to start soon.
So I started Tuesday. Realized I had to leave to celebrate my brother's graduation this week. Here was what the doctor did when I told him that I would be gone Friday and the first half of next week:
I have essentially did a speed run of the basics of the tasks I'm supposed to do the four days I've been in so far.
It's not even the end of week 2, mind you, and I haven't done a complete week at this place yet. Sure, the doctor's not expecting me to be an expert, but when I am the only one working at the front desk and I have no experience in the medical field or know how to do insurance claims maybe there should be a lot of training.
There is none. I have been taught way too many things in the span of four work days that takes thirty minutes to explain to me. And then it eats away my time because a new thing arises that the doctor didn't teach me.
He's expecting questions from me. I have so many and he's not available at all times. And I don't know how to tackle a lot of things without asking for help. There is no one available all the time. I am floundering. I'm spending way too much time after closing to figure out what to do by myself.
No one is teaching me how to read insurances. No one is teaching me how to explain to patients why their bill is like this. No one is teaching me how to be good on my own. This is the worst job with training. I'm essentially the face of a clinic who's trying to maintain people's health. And I have to learn "along the way"?
I don't know. I feel that when I'm in charge of looking at someone's expenses for their health, I feel there should be someone that should be training me from the moment I get into the office and the moment I leave.
I told myself I'll give this a chance. I wanted to give myself a year, 6 months at the bare minimum. Now I think I'll give it 3 months.
Oh and they told me my position is "office manager" when I had to tell someone what my position at the clonic is other than being just being an office clerk. Which. Was the job title on Indeed.
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dreamlogic · 3 months
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i have no clue what's going on w/ the hiring process for the job offer i got yesterday, but at least it seems like nobody at the post office does either. 🙃
#ctxt#charlie vs mail#got a call from some guy at the regional sorting facility like 'uuh yeah just drop in to your PO whenever for fingerprinting'#so i show up in shorts & a t-shirt as a stop along a multi-errand trip bc my impression was that this is just a part of the background check#woman doing my prints was like 'idk if anyone's here to speak with you today but we can check'#me still thinkin it's just a casual meet/greet 'oh no worries haha! btw i got the job offer before having even 1 interview is that normal?'#she doesn't know but leads me around until we find someone buried under a stack of paperwork at her desk#'hi [redacted!] charlie is here for their interview!'#redacted peers over his monitor like a deer in headlights 'who is here for their what now??? oh uuuhh gimme a minute uuuhhhhh'#i'm sweatinnnmng like i'm wearing my birks i am massively underprepared but ok i guess we're doing this & they already offered me the job so#redacted also seemed to be panicking a lil bc the person who usually does these interviews isn't even in today#we had a moment of 'so we're both utterly blindsided here right?' 'yeah can we reschedule?' 'yes god please let's reschedule'#so i'm going back thursday for an actual interview. after already completing background check & filling out tax paperwork#get home to an email from the dude who called me this morning like 'btw dress business casual for your fingerprinting & bring XYZ'#but still stating nowhere that the implication was that fingerprinting & interview would happen concurrently????#this is a federal institution & the second largest employer in the US. get ur shit together !!!#hoping it's not gonna be a black mark that i showed up in my casual summer clothes without the necessary docs#but tbf to me the expectations were hella unclear like i wasn't even given a point of contact for an onboarding supervisor until today#since they were also drastically underprepared i hope it'll just be water under the bridge & we can properly meet thursday#hands down weirdest hiring/onboarding process i've ever gone through but fuck it we ball
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every-captain · 1 month
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Idk man things are bad with my job.
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dramatic-dolphin · 11 months
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every time i have to call my dad to ask for money i feel so fucking bad im gonna throw up. what if i just shot myself instead 😐
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floralovebot · 5 months
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prayer circle that all the characters we haven't seen yet look good too 🙏
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dragonpyre · 6 months
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I have to say seeing some of the people I follow randomly get into Jedi fallen order / Jedi survivor lately and start taking Cal on as a blorbo is my favorite thing. You are blessing me with content of my boy and I love your art style. And also I think it's helping me get over my writers block with the fic I've been working on, so thank you for that.
Awwwww thank you so much! It’s also always an honor to know I’ve inspired ppl to work on their own creative works too
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tevatron · 2 months
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i'm so glad i won't be working with my pi after this month. i think i've reached my limit. i just can't deal with her anymore
#she said 'oh idk if i can make it to your thesis'#SHE IS ON MY THESIS COMMITTEE. SHE'S KNOWN ABOUT THIS FOR A YEARRRRRR#she said she might be on vacation w her bf... instead of going to my fucking thesis defense.#there was a special vote just so she could be on my committee. wdym you have to go on vacation#ALSO i've been asking her to check my calculations for a thing for MONTHS#and she still hasn't. but she made me present on it in front of a bunch of people.#i'd like to note that this calculation is like. the point of my thesis. and she hasn't even bothered to look at it#she forced the interns to work 50 hours last week. they're only being paid for 40.#she hasn't read any part of my thesis... others have but they don't know the details like she does#i told her to read my fucking thesis and she said she had and that it 'looked good'#what does that mean. WHAT does that mean. how do you have no comments. on my thesis. that determines whether i graduate#and then she said i'm ''irresponsible'' bc i went to a concert???#like it didn't affect anything. i showed up to work on time. i completed everything i meant to.#but i guess going to one concert is like. unacceptable.#i'm sooooo sorry i decided to go have fun for one night instead of agonizing about my thesis (that again. she hasn't read)#she asked if i want to give a talk at the new place she got hired at but she now works for fus#which is a incredibly conservative homophobic private catholic university. i've never heard anything positive about it#like they're legally allowed to discriminate against lgbt people... does she know what i fucking look like????#she's so so conservative but she only interacts with other conservative catholics#and doesn't understand how fucking vile her views are. and she wonders why people don't like her#like maybe she should shut the fuck up about how she thinks abortion is a sin at work!!#she once said 'the only time i feel uncomfortable in my skin is when i talk about being a conservative catholic at work'#AND THEN SHE SAID 'it really makes me understand how hijabis feel'#IN FRONT OF MY HIJABI COLLEAGUE. HELLO???? like she is not persecuted for being a conservative catholic#i literally started laughing when she said that. i think i said 'please get real'. and she's still mad#anyway. my colleague decided to no longer work with my pi. idk if it was bc of that comment#she mentioned that once i leave there won't be anyone who understands the data on the project anymore#like yeah. maybe you should've looked at the data. like at all#and not had an unpaid master's student do literally all the work for you
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skyburger · 7 months
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i love reading things set in countries that i'm knowledgeable and/or have been to because i can point out really minor errors in fanfiction. i think the average american does not know that in england (and apparently some of asia! which i only just found out) there are switches on power outlets so you can just turn it off instead of unplugging it. like 9 times out of 10 that won't come up but on the off chance it does i'm like ohoho. this clown has never been to england...! my favorite part though is watching americans (specifically americans because i swear to god people who speak english as a second language and/or are from any other country have some idea of what it's like to have an accent / personally know people who have accents? idk) try to write british accents like it is REALLY funny. i literally only lived their for five years and i never picked up a full accent myself (certain words and tones i did but they're mostly gone after living in the states again for a few years) but between living there and having a ridiculous amount of family there & visiting them often (like once a year if im lucky) i like KNOW what british accents sound like. i think some americans genuinely dont even know theres more than one or two english accents i think some people think there's like posh english and chav english and nothing else. maybe scottish accent gets thrown in there if they remember the uk is not in fact just england. i would bet real money they've never heard a welsh accent. anyway my point is it's really funny watching people who don't know as much as i do write this stuff. like i see it and i understand how doctors read this and go Oh that is so medically inaccurate. i get them now. anyway i dont remember what my point here was but please know if you are attempting to write a british accent. reddit and youtube are your best friends if you don't have a british friend you can ask and also rest assured even if you do ONE google search. it will not be the worst attempt ive seen guaranteed
#muffin mumbles#idek what the definitive worst one ive seen is#but ive seen some baaaaad ones#favorite example though is in the fucking jjba dub.#like thats not even a fan / indie project thats a real professional thing people were paid to do?!?! and the accents. are fucking TERRIBLE#please im begging you. you dont need to hire famous american voice actors for this. just go to any pub in the whole of england#and i can guarantee youd get better results accent-wise.#speedwagon's accent is easily the worst in part 1 like if you want examples lemme know cause i have some. its so bad. its really bad#but also so so funny#joseph in part 2 is. MARGINALLY better than most of the part 1 cast#not good. far from it. but an improvement#anyway hearing speedwagon say anything especially in part 1 (hes calmer in part 2 and he sounds better (not good. better)#like hes better in part 2 but not by much and only sometjmes.)#hearing this painfully obvious attempt at an american doing a cockney(?) (cant even tell for sure) accent complete with misused slang.#is SO fucking funny#like i showed me mom and she said it was worse than dick van dyke in mary poppins and shes not even wrong#and the slang isnt even like. irs not even super uncommon slang and i dont think its used wrong technically (iirc) but it just sounds so#painfully unnatural. please i am begging them to just hire british people next time. i promise you there are british voice actors#that being said i am still incredibly sad they just gave everyone american accents from part 3 onwards because i miss the awful accents#i miss them dearly.#the main benefit to this imo is that now joseph joestar despite living in england for the first almost twenty years of his life#just got this full blown american accent after living in new york. like i know he did not pick that up naturally#i KNOW dude watched stupid fuckinf tv shows to practice his accent. i know he sounded like a cartoon mobster and suzie q was like jojo.#please for the love of god. you cannot start talking like this. go back to being british#alas he did not listen. but he did drop the mobster thing (sadly.)#anyway this is really unrelated but if joseph was not old as fuck when it started airing i think he wouldve gotten a kick outta seinfeld.#like if the years lined up that wouldve been his main show to practice his american accent to the point people are like hey you kinda sound#like jerry seinfeld. and hes like hah i wonder how that happened!#hes a massive fucking loser is what im saying. hes like my weirdo great uncle joseph joestar#anyway. got really off topic. thank you for watching remember to SMASH that like button
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ardate · 9 months
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sniffs. man. i really want this job :(
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krustybob · 2 months
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fucking crazy i spent so much of my life figuring if i ever lived to see 25 id probably have all my shit together by then and yet here i am doing nothing but getting high & watching youtube poops & jacking off
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trujellyfish · 11 days
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its 10pm. i can either lie in bed for 4 hours reading fanfic til i finally slip into sleep
or i can play the outer worlds until i pass out on the couch....................
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