#please i just want to have a healthy relationship with my body and food and working out

[achingroses]

vent post lol

[lylian333]

~YANDERE LUKA X READER~

(this story may have changes soooo yeah but in the future I'll edit it to make it as perfect if I can )

WARNING: yandere, toxic relationship, read at your own risk, sexual assault,I need to touch grass and prey to god after this, noncon, weird siblings love(Luka isn't obsessed with hyuna in this story), if there other that I didn't contain please let me know

The first thing you ever see and remember is luka , he's always been there whenever you sad or happy he's always been there. Thankfully you both are taken in by an alien that wants you both to start calling him father , but to you as long as luka is there you'll feel safe.

Since the start you have always seen him as your brother he even knows about that, but perhaps he saw in a different way . you can even say he took advantage of you for being dumb and naive

Both of you are artificially bred but the end result came out quite differently especially health problems are the complete you are considered healthy perhaps even have a stronger immune system than others, while your brother is the opposite since he has asthma, and chronic migraines already.

before you both were send to Anakt Garden you both gown up with robots trying to teach and take care of both of you but the ways of it are scary and it is too much of a business that they would even care on how you smile and how you laugh .

But there are quite a few similarities between you both hate paparazzi like you guys like eating, sucking, and biting on things to satisfy you both hunger you both gown up with huge appetites as well and cause your father to worry about it and he starts giving us less food which to this day you curious that how you habits have begun.

Sometimes you both wanted to pass the time faster you both would cuddle but just cuddling tho there would be biting and touching at least your body wasn't comfortable with it but luka told you to just brush it off and you'll get used to it. this would only happened in private not waiting father or even anybody to find out about this just between you too. slowly the cuddle went from biting to kissing to even touching at weird spots but like luka said" just blush it off you'll get used to it after all you don't to make me upset do you ,dear ?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After that, you both were then sent to Anakt Garden father said it's the first step of your career you both are scared at first but at least you both got each other right? well luka health is kinda slowly getting worse there , and the other children's there kinda treat luka poorly because of his health but you always protect him by chasing the others away.

Not only that father give both of you guys top professionals to keep us well educated and healthy.

Time goes by in a blur, and with every passing day, you can feel the pressure of the competition looming over you both.The training is intensive and harsh, involving physical and mental conditioning to create the perfect idols. But they did have a playtime even so the daily routine consists of rigorous practice and training .

one day,while watching the other kids playing on the other side you and luka were playing with cube and seeing who can do it faster.two person came up to you both when you both look up they smile back and introduced themself" hello my name is hyuna and my younger brother is hyun woo do you guys want to be our friends and play?"

you look at luka waiting for him to make a decision he nod and your really happy about it cause you rarely see siblings and plus their very friendly not only that turns out that hyun woo is the same age as you while hyuna is the second oldest and luka the oldest.

After that day you guys would often hang out together you even started quit seeing them as part as your siblings because of how caring, kindful, and protective they are.

And slowly you start gaining feelings for hyun woo not just any feelings but a really special one even more special than luka and you.Hyun woo would often make a bouquet of flowers or flower head crowns just for you , he would also care for you talk to you a lot, and entertain you which you really enjoy. he would even help you to practice your vocals so that you wouldn't mess up in case and just overall a happy ball full of fun. and perhaps you can even say that you enjoy hyun woo accompany more then luka ones but maybe luka have caught on to you and hyun woo relationships.

About a year later of this at one day, after playing around you guys have gotten tried and decide to rest well hyuna go get some water you and hyun woo decide to lay down together perhaps even call it as a cuddle? Slowly you dive into sleep.

The next thing you knew when you woke up was you hear fighting??? you git confuse and rub your eyes and got up seeing what's going on.turn out it was luka and hyun fighting they rarelt fight even if they did it's usually luka who wanted to find trouble or he just didn't know about it but this fight is not like others it not playful it's like luka actually trying to hit hyun woo before you can fully process what to do luka use all his might and push hyun woo on the group causing him to accidently hit a rock.

Seeing that you instantly push luka causing him to fall on the ground when you turn around to check if hyun woo is okay but you notice his head is b-bleeee-bleeding , him not moving at all not even an inch

Hyuna came into the scene as well screaming" What's going on here and-...Hyun woo-"she stood there speed looking dumbfounded then robots and alien staff came in while hyuna was trying to leave his brother alone you turned around to your brother about to scream at him for what he did but you notice that he's hand is c-changing color-? it's was supposed to be- no not never purple you kneel against him confused picking up his finger and touching it not understanding what's going on why is so many things happening at once

You finally spoken out "luka why...?"

Hyuna kicked and screamed at all her might to put down her brother but the robots just pushed her away and the alien staff held her back she was madly crying. you wanted to go comfort her but when you were about to move luka held you tight "Don't leave me yet I'm not feeling well, sister" he said as he hold you tightly.

Ever since that day, hyuna has grown to have a negative sentiment to luka but even you can't blame her for what she has to be.

One peaceful night well sleeping, you got woken up by hyuna shacking your body trying to silently wake you up"(y/n) Follow me now" she whispered into your ear

'"Where are we going?"

"We're going to escape from this place from our owners and from this living hell, now come on we don't have much time left"

She then pulls your hand out of bed and starts running. You have so many questions in your head but before you can ask any question hyuna pulls you down onto the ground hiding from cameras and security "(y/n) , you may be confused right now but I'll explain to you when we both get out of here please escape with me you're the only person I trusted even after the incident. But please wake up there are many dark secret about this place and the future career all you have to do is just follow me and run across the field climb up a gate and get out"

Part of you wanted to listen to hyuna and escape this living hell and owners of a place but half of you wanted to stay with your older brother and is afraid that luka would be weak and may be left out .....

In the end you choose to escape for your own good for your own freedom and rights. You nod to hyuna who's smile at you and nod back understanding

You both slowly craw out of your hiding spot till one of you got caught by the camera and robots . you both run you tried keeping up to her speed . the alarms were to on alarming the others that the children's are escaping .

Some robots even try shooting you guys down but it can't . Hyuna begin to climb the gate to escape while screaming"(y/n) you can do this just trust me!"

Half way there you feel a strong pull at your leg and caused you to slip down and hit your head on the gate and the ground before you pass out from the pain you ever last encountered with her just looking down at you from the top with her sad and hopeless expression before she keeps going

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When you woke up you woke up your realized that you were not in the Anakt Garden bed you were in your home bed with luka on the side hugging you. You were curious and confused and eve scared that father would punish you. When trying to move you feel a sharp pain causing you to moan uncomfortable causing luka to wake up"Finally you woke up dear after a few days without you feel horrible but it's fine our owner has taken us back to home"

Hearing that makes you remember what happened you feel like you are disappointed in yourself you feel horrible for letting yourself down why are you so stupid there is nothing you can do but shed tears hugging your brother.

~Timeskip many years later~

You were sitting on the bed waiting for Luka to return from round 5 you both may be singers but never in the same stage or competition for both of your sake. Your competition was over with you winning and nothing surprising from what has happened multiple times in the past. But how do they manage to hold different competitions and different members at once.

Then you hear the door open, luka enters with his face injury and black eyes it's not your first time seeing this but every time you do it reminds you of the past...

Luka sat on the couch waiting for you to grab equipment to help with his injury. when you did he pulled you to sit on his lap "You're the only thing I want your life is mine and need I miss spending time with you like in the old days....why don't we cuddle again like how we used to maybe more intense now since you gown up right now a baby anymore..." he chuckles cupping your cheek

there hasn't been an ending yet sooon I came up with my own for now and maybe in the future I'll edit it better bc I only have one week left before my fucking important ass exam(please pray for me) .But I just fell into the fandom bc of the edit it's so good man and I'll also try understanding the concept alright I know this is really mess up but still...anyways thanks for reading

[vanteguccir]

── ୨୧ !　𝗔𝗧𝗘𝗟𝗢𝗣𝗛𝗢𝗕𝗜𝗔

　　　　　　　　𝒎𝒂𝒕𝒕 𝒔𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒐𝒍𝒐 x reader

SUMMARY: Where Y/N has suffered with an eating disorder for years, but lately, - because of the some "fans" and social media - her insecurities have been taking her to a more than dangerous path, which she couldn't get out without help.

WARNING: anorex!a, eating disorder, comparison, self sabotage, self hatred, panic attack, pure angst... PLEASE read with caution!

REQUESTED?: No.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: That is my work, I DON'T authorize any plagiarism! | English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry if there's any grammar error.

　　　༻✦༺ 　༻✧༺　༻✦༺

Atelophobia; the fear of not being good enough.

This was one of the millions of fears and problems that haunted Y/N's mind. Her head convinced her a long time ago that she simply wasn't enough; for her school teachers, for her classmates, for her friends, for her parents, past boyfriends... not even for herself.

This led her to listen to what others said and thought about herself since she was very young, the desire to be perfect and within society's standards in all aspects of a human being consumed her; personality, thoughts, knowledge... body.

She was told all the time how she should behave, act, and be. She was just a child, but that didn't seem to matter to those who did it, clogging her up with responsibilities and comparisons.

One thing led to another. Her desperation to be the best at everything started to include her own body. "Fat" was the first word people used to describe her. She had no control over the situations around her, but she had control over her weight.

Y/N was always the biggest girl in her class, and her classmates seemed to love reminding her of that; often being excluded from work groups, forgotten in groups of friends, or not chosen in any team during Physical Education classes.

Until the year when everything changed. During the school vacation, she decided to change, intending to return to school as a new girl. The new cycle started well, Y/N saw a nutritionist, cutting out all fatty foods from her routine and consuming only healthy ones. She started going to the gym daily, doing the recommended training time. All of this led her to lose a significant amount of weight.

Soon, the vacation was over, and with that, the negative comments from her classmates were replaced by positive comments. Girls asking what she had done to lose weight like that, searching for advice and seeing her as a miracle. Boys saying how changed and prettier she looked.

How could she not fall in love with her own illness?

So, that made her feel good. Too good... her mind began to yearn to become thinner, more beautiful, just to hear more from others. And then the healthy diet and the one hour training at the gym were no longer enough for her. She needed more if she wanted to be better.

Y/N then intensified her training, staying at the gym for 2 hours per day, doing more reps with more weight. She crossed out several foods from the list of permitted that her nutritionist had made, choosing for herself the ones she thought were ideal, until it had almost nothing left.

Her brain self-sabotaged so that she wouldn't go out with her friends, because they would definitely want to eat somewhere and she wouldn't be able to.

She no longer participated in family dinners, creating excuses so as not to be forced to sit at the table and eat.

Her mind convinced her that she wasn't thin enough to satisfy her boyfriends' sexual and non-sexual desires, which made her pull away during or at the beginning of any relationship she had until the guy got tired, or she simply ended it.

She spent hours on the internet, searching for sensational diets that reduced daily calories to 500 or less, promising extraordinary weight loss. In addition to getting on the scale at least 4 times a day, hoping for a miracle every time she looked at the numbers.

Y/N replaced her eating schedules with random hobbies like drawing, learning a new instrument, or picking flowers from her garden to make flower crowns, occupying her time and mind.

Some things scared her, her period hadn't come in months, clumps of hair fell out every time she ran her hands through it. Her vision went dark at least 3 times a day. Her body shivered from the complete cold of her insides, and her stomach hurt more than usual.

But she had to suffer them alone since she had no one to talk to about, always alone.

Until Y/N met Matt.

Matt was the boy who made her want to get better. He encouraged her to look for a hospital that fit her preferences, where Y/N finally began to receive psychiatric and psychological care.

Her diet changed for the better, into foods that Y/N saw as safe. She did not abandon the gym but reduced the weight and time, maintaining her training just for the health of her muscles, as she had lost a lot of lean mass during her worst moment.

The calculator in her head finally stopped. Her eyes started seeing food as just food and not as the enemy. Her stomach craved for all the snacks she loved, and she finally ate them, without feeling guilty.

Matt was so thoughtful about her entire situation, having suffered himself with extreme anxiety from a young age. He could tell he understood in parts what it was like to live with a mental illness.

So he helped her maintain her healthy diet and eat all her daily meals within her limit - often opting to eat together in their room, since he knew the trepidation Y/N still felt about doing it in front of other people.

Matt praised her in every possible situation, trying not to be extreme but to show his intense love and support for the girl. All of that was helping her a lot.

Until it wasn't.

Y/N and Matt never hid their relationship from the public, the girl knew how famous her boyfriend was and how difficult it could be to keep their relationship hidden, they would be seen together at one time or another.

So it wasn't surprising that the girl appeared in some of the triplets' pictures sometimes, and that's what happened that Friday.

As usual, Nick posted a photo dump on the triplets Instagram to promote the publication of their new car video, and one of the photos was of Matt and Y/N, specifically one in which the two were sitting on the couch in their living room, the girl had her legs draped over Matt's thighs, while his tattooed arm wrapped tightly around her waist, huge smiles decorating their faces.

It was a cute photo, but apparently, that wasn't what fans thought.

While Matt and his brothers were in the kitchen, preparing healthy snacks - a habit they built through the girl, but which in the end helped everyone -, Y/N was lying on her bed in the room she shared with Matt, wrapped in too-warm covers, holding her phone with her right hand while her left hand wrapped around her stomach in an almost painful grip.

Her thumb scrolled through the comments screen beneath the post. Almost everyone there talking about her picture with Matt.

"Matt can do so much better than her"

"I really don't know what he saw in her"

"She's going to end up crushing him like that"

"I'll pay for the gym for her if that's the price for Matt to have a worthy girlfriend"

And so on, it was as if they knew all of Y/N's weaknesses.

Some fans of them could be cruel when they wanted to, and Y/N knew this by heart since seeing Nick crying several times because he was body shamed, or when she noticed Chris being quieter than usual after reading comments saying how loud he was and how that was unbearable.

Her heart was crushed every time she saw Matt suffer in silence until he couldn't hold it in any longer and finally cried in her lap for hours after reading people saying how insignificant and quiet he was in the videos.

Even though a huge mass of the fandom loved them with all their hearts and took care of them as much as the distance of a phone screen allowed, it still wasn't enough to swallow the hate comments.

But when it came to Y/N, more than half of the fandom turned against her. Maybe out of envy, but it was obvious that the girl didn't see it that way. She was convinced that they were right.

Her heart tightened as if someone was crushing it with their bare hands. The air seemed to escape her lungs, and the lunch she ate hours before seemed to want to go up her throat. Her fingers trembled as she held her stomach, feeling everything she had and didn't have there. Her eyes began to water, her lips quivering from the tears that wanted to escape.

Y/N quickly moved her finger to the back button, hoping to break out of the horrible cycle she was about to enter. A loud sob escaped her lips when, upon finally leaving the post, her feed reloaded, and a picture of a model that Y/N followed and admired appeared.

Comparison was her biggest enemy.

Negative thoughts about herself began to pollute her mind, everything around her becoming a fog. The sounds coming from the kitchen became muffled to her ears. Y/N's right hand - which was holding her phone - was gripping the device in such a way that her fingers turned white. Painful sobs escaped her mouth as her eyes remained fixed on the woman's perfect figure.

Why can't I be like her?

The longing for the sensations she felt when she starved hit her chest hard. The desire to want to be as thin as before - or more - filled her.

It didn't take long, and soon, the bedroom door was slowly opened, Matt's silhouette appearing behind it. His face was lit up with a smile - probably because of some joke his brothers made - while his right hand held a plate with two sandwiches.

His cheerful expression was replaced by a frown of concern. Matt quickly closed the door with his feet, walking towards the bed, haphazardly placing the plate on the nearest bedside table before sitting down on the mattress.

His hands flew to Y/N's waist, stopping over her own hand that was squeezing her skin with a force that was sure to leave it bruised.

The girl seemed to wake up from her trance, lifting her head and meeting Matt's calming - but worried - gaze. She cried harder as she imagined what her boyfriend would be thinking of her now.

Automatically, her mind started to play her current state, messy hair, swollen and red face, skin wet with tears, eyes half closed and mouth open, allowing sobs to escape from there.

"M-Matt-" Her sentence was cut off by a sob, her eyes closing tightly.

Matt took a deep breath, trying to process what to do next. His left hand - the one that didn't cover hers - slowly took the phone, taking it out of his girl's death grip. He glanced briefly at the screen, automatically understanding what was happening before locking it and putting the device aside.

He moved his body so that it was closer to hers, resting his hand on her spine and guiding her until she laid her head on his chest, caressing the area below his fingers.

Matt felt his heart break with every tremble that rocked the body beneath his caused by the sobs. If he could take that pain away from his girlfriend, he would.

"It's okay, baby, let it out. I'm right here." He cooed, his fingers caressed the tangled strands of her hair lightly, stroking the area while moving his upper body back and forth, slowly calming his girlfriend.

"Ma-Matty-" Y/N's voice was weak, wobbly from the pain in her heart.

Matt removed his hand from hers for a few seconds, stretching it to the bedside table - where the plate was -, taking the bottle of water that Y/N always filled before going to sleep. He opened the lid in one quick movement, bringing it close to his girl's face.

"Come on, my love. Sit down for a moment and take a sip of water. Please." The boy asked in a soft voice, helping Y/N straighten her posture before bringing the bottle closer to her lips, helping her take a few small sips of the contents.

He closed the bottle after making sure she was satisfied, placing it on the mattress before turning his attention to Y/N again. He brushed away the strands of hair from her face, tucking them behind her ear.

"What if they're right?" She asked in a whisper, catching her bottom lip between her teeth in an attempt to keep from crying.

"No, they aren't." Matt's tone was convincing, as if he was absolutely sure of what he was saying. "You are not worse than others because of your weight. You look great as you are. Your body is perfect, do you know why? Because he's healthy enough to carry you around and take care of you." The boy held her hands lightly, stroking the back of her fingers gently as he looked into her eyes. "The recovery journey is not easy, I remember the words your psychologist said to me when we had that session together. I imagine your head when you see clothes getting tighter, and these comments certainly make you want to give up, I know you, baby."

He paused momentarily, watching her reactions carefully.

Y/N knew that, recovery was hard work. Not wanting to die was hard work.

"Recovery is not a race. You don't have to feel guilty about taking less or more time than you originally thought or having relapses from time to time. This is part of the process, and I want you to understand this. You are the most beautiful girl I have ever seen in my entire life. When I look at the most beautiful things, I remember you. In the pink tulips of the flower shop across the street, in the Cassiopeia constellation, in the bees that fly in our garden and in the greenest tree I have ever seen." Y/N let out a tearful laugh when she heard him mention the tree, knowing his immense love for nature. "Because you're pretty like them."

"I-I'm sorry." The girl whispered, sniffling then lowering her gaze in shame. "I... I saw the photos that Nick posted, and there were comments..." She shook her head, closing her eyes tightly.

"Oh baby." He leaned slightly over Y/N, sealing his lips over her warm forehead. "If you want to apologize, let me do it. If you went through this now, it was because of me."

"No, Matt. It was never and will never be your fault." Y/N shook her head, wiping her eyes momentarily with the sleeve of her - his - hoodie, sniffling slightly before taking one of Matt's hands, intertwining their fingers. "You don't control people, much less through the internet. They will always talk a lot because they are behind a screen that protects them, but that will never be your fault. I would rather go through this a thousand times and have you with me than never have you again."

"I understand." He paused momentarily. "Please, don't let it get to that point again while you're alone. If you see something that upsets you or makes you feel bad, turn it off instantly and call me. I want to be there to help you. I want to be there for you." The brunette asked, staring at her eyes.

Y/N sighed, nodding her head and leaning slightly closer to him, resting her forehead on Matt's shoulder, exhaling the softening scent and perfume that exuded from the fabric of the hoddie on his body.

Her eyes burned from the tears she shed, closing them tightly to prevent more from falling, her heart still feeling sore from everything.

"If you want, we can contact that psychologist again, the one who helped you throughout the process at the hospital." Matt lowered his head, bringing his face closer to the back of Y/N's head, pressing his lips against his girl's hair, closing his eyes as he felt the warmth of her body close to his. "I want to attend some sessions just like we did last time, so I understand how I can help you this time."

Y/N felt her heart warm instantly, her free hand snaking to Matt's thigh closest to her, stroking the covered skin lightly.

"Okay."

Matt loved Y/N more than he loved himself, and he would make sure that she understood that she wasn't alone anymore.

taglist:

@lustfulslxt @ladybunny44 @worldlxvlys @earth2starkey @remussbitch @freshloveforthefit @il0vebeingdelulu @sturniolowhore @mimi-luvzyu @alorsxsturn @urfavgirllyyyyy @domizzzsstuff @sturnizd @hearts4chris @cupidzsq @dracoflaco @leah-loves-lilies @tylerthecreatorsrealwife

(If you want to be added to the taglist, go to this post)

[allurilove]

If y/n gets pregnant with a yandere, what will their reaction be when they find out

(good luck with your math score)

lol tysm!

Yandere boyfriend:

“…but…” He comically gulped. Your boyfriend stood there unsure on what to do and say next. You saw a flash of confusion on his face as he tried to figure out the last time you two were close in an intimate way. He was silent for a while, his eyes slowly traveling down to his groin, and he swore he always used a condom.

“We live in a tiny apartment near campus, it’s always noisy because of the frat parties, and you still have school to finish.” He scratched his head. “How would we take care of the baby?”

“What would your parents think too?” Your boyfriend groaned, his head now in his hands and he gripped his hair. “Fuck, I don’t want them to hate me.”

Yandere stalker:

“Do you know who the father is?” He asked first and foremost. When you give him a look and put your hands on your hips, he scoffed. “Oh don’t act like you haven’t slept with your ex. I know what I saw.”

“Listen, you don’t have the best track record.” Your stalker rolled his eyes and his hand is now placed on your shoulder. “Regardless… I’ll help you out.”

He pulled you in for a hug, his arms wrapped around you gently, and he slightly swayed you back and forth. “Only if I can name the baby.”

Yandere husband:

He wasn’t surprised when you came clean that you’ve been pregnant for about two months. “Hm.” He pretended to be deep in thought, and his fingers stroke his chin. “I knew it. You were acting strange…asking me for cuddles and stealing my lounge shirts.”

“Do you want to keep the baby…?” Your husband asked you gently, and he took your hands into his. “I know three kids can be a lot… let’s just think about this alright?”

Yandere knight:

Yandere knights heart dropped and he sighed deeply. He knew he shouldn’t have given into his desires and take you that night. Gosh, if your parents found out… he would be executed immediately. Your knight touched his neck, his fingers felt his wild pulse, and he thought about how much he would miss having his head attached to his body.

He could imagine it now. A public execution in front of everyone, the people booing him and throwing rotten food at his body, while one of the guards leads him to the guillotine. Your knight gulped and he reluctantly nodded. “Thats… quite unfortunate.”

Yandere classmate:

He immediately looked displeased and he crossed his arms. “I hope you’re joking.” Your classmate took the pregnancy test from you, and his scrutinizing gaze was now on the plastic. “Can we pretend that two lines means that you aren’t pregnant?”

Yandere neighbor:

“Really?” He brightened up by your words and his hand is now pressed against your stomach. You weren’t showing, but he was excited at the thought of starting a family with you.

“You know… I’ve always wanted to have a family of my own and celebrate the holidays together! Awww, c’mere love.” He opened his arms.

Yandere best friend:

“Oh. OH!” He loudly gasped and he slapped the sandwich out of your hands. “That has deli meat! You can’t have that, right?”

He then sadly looked at the disassembled food on the ground, and he sheepishly chuckled when you glared at him. “Sorry, I was just trying to save my friend and the little one… please don’t hurt me.” Your friend joked and he started to run off when you took a step towards him.

Yandere blood bag:

That wasn’t much of a surprise to him considering how active you two were in the relationship. It was bound to happen anyways. He shoved his face with healthy foods, worked out extra hard, and made sure his body was in tip top shape. He exposed his neck to you, and he felt your fangs sink and break into his skin. You drank hungrily, and he had to keep his mouth shut. He didn’t want to complain, especially to someone that was pregnant, and he just took it.

“Ah- baby be careful.” He whined and he rubbed your waist. “I feel light headed…”

Yandere chaebol:

“About time.” He huffed and he got up from his chair. “I’ll start designing the baby’s room, hiring a night nurse, and all that. Just keep yourself healthy, and walk often.”

Yandere chaebol started to dial his mother on his cell phone. He referred to her as eomma, and he talked to her in his native language. He actually sounded like he was being respectful and polite, he then wrote down recipes that were perfect for pregnant women. For example, the seaweed soup was given to the woman after birth. He got up, walked past you, and he handed the list to his private chef.

[kaliforniahigh]

Starting to date Noah and sneakily avoiding any food related get togethers or saying you aren't hungry all the time. Redirecting date ideas to something unrelated to food. Texting with him and telling him that you aren't hungry even though he knows you only had a coffee and a muffin today. Thinking he doesn't notice because he's a guy after all. Little do you know that he's asked the guys if they have noticed how you never eat around them. Maybe he notices a calorie tracker on your phone. After he confronts you, he learns that you're extremely uncomfortable eating in front of people, in public especially, because ex's have made comments about your weight. Never being completely comfortable eating around people but he likes to leave you little premade snacks and seeing the empty container makes him feel better.

Honestly I'm terrible for having a single coffee a day, eating maybe 3 times a week. Mostly I'm just busy but there is always a little voice in my head saying that I haven't burned enough calories to be eating anything.

Thank you for trusting me with this request <3 Please seek help if you need to, we care about you and we want to see you happy and healthy!

Warnings: this story deals with eating disorder and a toxic relationship (not with Noah), hospitals and fat-shaming comments directed at reader.

Requests are closed for now.

WC: 2.3k

"You're not putting that in the cart", you heard a voice behind you.

You usually skipped the junk food isles whenever you went to the grocery store. You didn't know why you stopped this time, but you were hoping he wouldn't find you. It was just your luck that your boyfriend showed up right behind you as you grabbed a package of Oreos.

"I wasn't going to, was just looking at it", you put the Oreos back on the shelf.

"Those have around 471 calories, we don't need that going into your body", he told you as he grabbed a pack of KitKats and dropped in the cart. You wanted to tell him those have 518 calories, but you kept your mouth shut.

It was always like this, he could eat whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted, but deprived you of the basic pleasures of life, like eating an Oreo for dessert.

You rarely went out to eat, him telling you that restaurants didn't use good quality ingredients, therefore, the food wasn't healthy and there was too much grease. Instead, you stayed wholed up in your house, eating whatever bland food he made for you.

Even now, a year after ending this relationship, you still held on to some habits, like checking the calories on things before you bought them and avoid eating fried food. But eating in front of people was the habit that was the hardest to let go of. You knew they most likely didn't give a shit or didn't even pay attention to you, but you couldn't help but feel their eyes on you, judging how much you could eat.

You hated the person he made you become. You were never like this as a kid. Your parents always made you feel comfortable in your own skin. Family gatherings always consisted of a lot of food, made and assembled on the table with love and care by your family members. And you weren't shy about eating and tasting all of it.

Now, you couldn't fathom the though of eating a whole burger by yourself.

That's why when you met Noah and his friends, you felt such whiplash from the behavior patterns you were used to in your last relationship.

You soon noticed that when they ordered food, they ordered food for real. They were a big group of people, but still, it looked like the amount of food could feed an army. You could always get away without eating in these social gatherings, everyone was so focused on their own food and conversations that they didn't even notice you not eating.

When Noah asked you out on your fist date, you specifically told him to not take you out to eat at a restaurant. You made up a lie about you having a lot of food allergies. So he took you to the Santa Monica pier, that way, you could choose whatever you wanted to eat.

You popped a couple of popcorns in your mouth - it was the healthiest option you could find - and when he finished his hot dog and excused himself to the bathroom to wash his hands, you dumped the popcorn in the nearest trash can.

That was almost six months ago and you thought you were so unsuspecting with your eating habits, that is until you were strolling through the supermarket with Noah.

He noticed you grabbed a lot of things from the shelves, looked over the packaging and put it back. By the third time he saw you doing this, he couldn't help but ask.

"Baby, what are you doing?", he asked you and noticed you freezing a little at his question.

"What do you mean?" you tried to buy yourself some time to come up with an excuse as to why you were looking over the nutrition facts on everything you wanted to buy.

"If you want anything, you can just put it in the cart, no problem", he told you as he walked closely behind you through the isle.

"It's ok, I can't eat any any of these things anyway, the calories are out of this world", you kept walking, not even noticing what you just said and that Noah completely came to a halt behind you.

"Baby", he called out to you and you looked back at him, he walked the couple of steps to reach you, leaving the cart behind and standing in front of you. "Were you checking the calories on every food you picked up?", he grabbed your face in his hands as he asked you the question.

"N-no, it wasn't that", you answered, but stuttered and he could tell you were lying.

"You don't have to look at that shit, if you want to eat it, we can buy it, the damn calories don't make a difference"

His words were sweet and you could tell he was worried, but you wished it was that simple. Your mind just can't get past all the scoldings if you even dared to take a look at the foods he forbid you from eating, or the way he made you weigh yourself weekly to see if you gained any weight.

"Can we talk about this later?", you told him in a small voice, not wanting to discuss this in the middle of the supermarket isle, or ever, actually.

"We'll talk about it when you're ready", he gave you a peck on the lips and dropped the subject for the moment. You breathed a sigh of relief and held yourself back from grabbing anything from the shelves.

After this day, Noah kept a close eye on you, noticing how you kept to your water instead of eating anything with the guys when they were over having lunch or dinner, or how you left before or after luch or dinner time whenever it was just the two of you.

So he decided to talk to Nicholas about it.

"Have you noticed anything strange with Y/N lately?" he asked his best friend when they were sitting on the couch playing Mario Kart one night.

"No, dude. Should I have noticed something?", Nicholas asked back. Noah was sure he wasn't imagining things.

"We were buying stuff at the supermarket the other day and I noticed she was looking at the packages of everything she picked up from the shelves", he started to explain, and Nicholas paused the game so he could pay attention to what Noah was saying.

"So I questioned her about it and she said something about calories, and then I realized that she was checking the nutritional facts to decide if she would buy it or not. So I started to pay attention and noticed that she doesn't eat anything around us or me", he gave a big sigh of frustration. He wanted to confront you about it, but didn't want you to run for the hills.

"I offered her some chicken wings the other night but she refused them", Nicholas pointed out to him.

"Can you just keep an eye on her? Just to make sure I'm not making things up in my head?" Nicholas nodded and assured him he would say something if he noticed anything strange.

The days went by and you kept to the same pattern, until one day when Noah was sitting in the studio, working on new music and his phone rang beside him. Looking at the caller ID, he saw it was your mother giving him a call.

It wasn't unsual for them to talk, but they never called each other, choosing to stick to text messages intead. He picked up the phone as soon as he saw it was her.

"Hey, what's up?" he greeted, heart beating faster for no reason at all.

"Hey, Noah. I can't explain right now, but Y/N is in the hospital. She's fine, but I think she needs to see you", her voice was calm and that's what helped not alarm him too much. He got up from the chair and didn't bother putting his sneakers on, opting for the sliders already on his feet.

"I'll be there in a minute", he told her.

"I'll be waiting for you at the entrance", he gave a hum of acknowledgment and hung up the phone.

His head ran over a million possibilities of what could've happened to you, but he tried to keep himself from going crazy on the drive to the hospital. Your mom said you were fine, and he trusted her.

Sure enough, she was waiting for him at the entrance, wanting to talk to him before he went into your room. He approached her and they hugged as a greeting.

"Listen, I know you've probably noticed Y/N's eating habits by now", she told him and he nodded. "She is gonna tell you all you need to know, just please be patient with her. I know you're a good man and she's gonna need your support right now"

"I'll do anything she needs me to do" he reassured her.

"I know you are. She is in room 102" she told Noah and he got inside the hospital, stopping at the reception and then being led to your room.

He opened the door and saw you laying there on the bed. The sight broke his heart. You looked fragile and a little embarassed.

"Hi, baby" he said in a soft tone, not wanting to alarm you, as he took a seat on the chair, scooting over closer to your bed.

"Hey, there. I guess I owe you an explanation", you looked at him with a guilty look on your face.

"What happened, baby?", he took your hands in his and gave you his full attention.

"Apparently I'm very anemic", you let out a sarcastic laugh. "Before I met you, I had a boyfriend", you dived straight into it, not giving you the time to talk yourself out of this. "He was very controlling, specially with what I ate. He always told me he wasn't the kind of guy to date overweight girls", you felt his grip on your hand tighten at your words.

"He made me check the calories on everything I bought at the supermarket, hence why I was doing it that day. He would get very annoyed if I even looked at unhealthy foods in front of him. He made me weigh myself in front of him every week to make sure I didn't gain weight"

You closed your eyes, tears stinging them and threating to fall down your cheeks. But you kept going regardless.

"He was cruel because he ate everything I couldn't in front of me. To this day, I really do believe it was a form of psychological torture. I finally had the guts to break up with him after talking with my mom and my therapist", you looked at him and saw his brows were furrowed, you could tell he was angry about everything this man put you through.

"But old habits die hard and I guess I haven't fully realized I'm not in that place anymore. Everytime I reach for something at the supermarket or anytime you guys order food or we have a barbeque, his voice and his insults echo in my head all over again, and I can't help it but let it consume me"

"If I'm being honest with you, I just wanna bash this dude's head in right now", he said through gritted teeth. He couldn't fathom anyone putting their partner through this kind of thing.

"I heard he moved out of the country a few months back" you told him and he was actually glad, because he was already making plans in his head on how to find this guy and give him a piece of his mind.

"What can I do to help you?", he decided to change the topic of conversation to what you needed right now. He was going to focus on you.

"Going to therapy weekly again is a must. And try to get out of my comfort zone. In another words, I really have to start and try to eat more and more regularly" you told him and you could see the gears in his head turning.

"Here's what we're gonna do: you're gonna make a list of everything you're comfortable eating, and I'm gonna make you meals and snacks with those. You don't have to eat in front of me if you don't want to, I just need to know you're eating. And then the foods that trigger you, we can work on them together along with your therapist to make sure you're safe with eating them again" he had a whole game plan set out, and your eyes welled with tears for a different reason this time.

"It might take a while" you warned him.

"We have forever to work on it" he leaned over you to plant a kiss on your forehead.

The weeks following, he kept a close eye on you, but made sure to not crowd you. He had various snacks in different containers in the fridge for you to grab whenever you felt hungry, and you made an effort to put the empty containers on the countertop so he could see you were eating them.

Therapy felt good and soon you were finding yourself getting out of your shell more and more. You and Noah went on your first dinner date, and you finally got to taste Matt's amazing barbeque. Drinking beer again was amazing, and you would never forget the taste of having a sweet treat after a long day, or after a delicious meal.

You got to experience what a real relationship felt like, how it was to have supportive people around you. You no longer felt like you were being watched and judged, instead, they encouraged you to be yourself with no shame.

[neoameba]

Hey, how was your day/night?

i was wondering if I could request a Gyutaro x male reader, please.

Like sfw and nsfw headcanons(if your ok with nsfw), or maybe like a nsfw story about the reader wanting to go on him, and him being embarrassed about his looks and we tell him that his beautiful and all that stuff? Thanks for reading this!

Gyutaro x Male! Reader Headcanons

Warnings: sfw and nsfw content, slightly abusive behaviors, mentions of blood. There are headcanons for ftm people, nsfw is below keep reading!

☆ Your relationship would not be easy, at least in the beginning. He is a reserved guy and loves to scare people, so be prepared for subtle threats.

☆ Now if you were an oni and especially an upper moon, things would change quite a lot. He wouldn't respect you at all at first, like a spoiled brat. But after the relationship, he would be more clingy. Not on an extreme level, but he would respect you and constantly give you compliments.

☆ And speaking of compliments, Gyutaro loves them. "You're such a handsome man... So strong... I can't believe you're with a guy like me..." And if you were a human, he would still continue to give you compliments, albeit with some insults. "You are so fragile, my love... Such a pathetic human but so beautiful..."

☆ Daki doesn't really like you at first. She hates men and the only one she allows to be by her side is her older brother. Gyutaro really wanted you guys to get along, but he would never pressure his sister to accept you, so he just prefers you stay away from her. Nothing would change if you were a upper moon, the only difference is that Daki wouldn't tell you to your face that she despises you.

☆ But over time, she would learn to deal with you. And after a long time, you would have a healthy relationship as far as possible. Gyutaro loves this and doesn't want to hide it.

☆ Gyutaro doesn't know how to express his feelings. Everything he feels is too overwhelming for him. So, he wouldn't say "I love you", he would scratch your skin while enjoying the blood flowing with a smile on his face. He wouldn't do that in your face, so as not to ruin your beauty.

☆ If you were a human, he would bring you food and some bandages as an "apology", since he knows you are fragile and those cuts were deep. Now, if you were an oni, prepare to receive a million bodies of your favorite humans. Do you prefer to eat men? Here it is, the best ones for you. This isn't an apology for scratching your skin, since he knows you weren't hurt. It's another way to show affection.

☆ He would often ask Daki's opinion in dealing with you since he has never dated and has no experience with men. The problem is that Daki's experiences weren't exactly romantic, which would lead to slight embarrassment.

NSFW

☆ I don't see Gyutaro as a restricted dom/top, or restricted sub/bottom. If you were top, he wouldn't mind being the passive one. He's just very inexperienced, and would trust whatever you say is best.

☆ He loves praise and reassurance, even during sex. If he was the bottom, I'd love to hear your voice telling you how beautiful he looks writhing in pleasure beneath you, or how cute he looks while riding you. And if he was the top one, he would definitely whisper in your ear how beautiful you are, and how warm and comfortable your body is for him.

☆ His favorite positions are the ones where he can look straight into your face and the ones where he doesn't have to move as much. Although, when he is the top one, he hates anything slow.

☆ He cries with pleasure when he is the passive one. It's simply a lot to deal with. He would grab the sheets and ask you to stop (spoiler: don't stop, he wants you to be even more aggressive).

☆ Punishments? He hates it. The worst are the ones where he can't look at you. So blindfolds and positions where his face is against you drive him crazy. On the other hand, when he becomes more experienced at it, he loves to punish you. He hurts you a lot in these punishments, even too much. If you are a human, you better not make any mistakes.

☆ If you are ftm/afab, I wouldn't change anything. He would still love you and have no problem with sex. If you were the top/dom one, he probably wouldn't be able to take a bounce before asking for a break. If you were the bottom, he would make a point of going as deep into your cunt as possible, and would always tease you with it. Of course, at first he didn't even know he could go that deep without hurting you.

☆ He has no idea what "aftercare" is. Explain to him and one of two things: either he'll think it's a waste of time because he's an oni, or he'll get the best beginner aftercare of all. If you were a human, regardless of whether you are bottom or top, he would take care of you afterwards, even in his own way. If you were an oni, he would be the one who would have to do the aftercare. Not because he needs it, but maybe, and just maybe... Because he likes to be taken care of by you.

Author's note (my notes :P)!

I hope you liked it, and that it turned out the way you wanted!

I don't post nsfw here, but I decided to break the rule and make an exception for you ♪⁠┌⁠|⁠∵⁠|⁠┘⁠♪

[damiansgoodgirll]

hi❤️ive been following you since you were writing about jude bellingham lol 😂 i wanted to ask you if you could make a damian priest x reader story where reader is plus sized and she’s struggling with losing weight and she wants to be perfect for damian because she sees the type of women he’s surrounded by but reader hurts herself like she faints or something happens and damian (rhea too if you want include her) get worried for her, please make it angsty i love your angst stories 😭❤️ thank you for this ❤️❤️

thanks for your request! i’ve been struggling with ED my whole life so this piece is kind of a piece of me. if you ever need someone to talk to i’m here ❤️ just to remind you that you are beautiful the way you are, you deserve all the love and happiness in the world ❤️

damian priest x curvy - plus sized - chubby reader

likes comments and reblogs are always appreciated!!

‼️ANGST, heavy angst, ED (eating disorders), reader starving herself, fainting, self conscious reader, hurt/comfort, DON’T READ THIS IF IT’S A SENSITIVE TOPIC FOR YOU ‼️

be skinny

be skinny - your mind told you.

don’t eat this, you’re gonna gain weight - it kept whispering.

you couldn’t recall when all of this started. sure, you’ve always had a love and hate relationship with your body, with your appearance but it never got to the point where you constantly checked yourself in every mirror you could find. it never got to the point where you would weight yourself every morning to see if you magically lost weight over night.

damian made all of those feelings go away. at the beginning of your relationship you told him how uncomfortable you were being naked in front of him, fearing that he might have judged you for how you looked but he never failed to make you feel comfortable and loved. you remember the days he spent just worshipping your body, saying how perfect you were to him and how much he loved you.

all those fears disappeared with damian so when did it really begin?

probably when he started appearing in his perfect colleagues tiktoks. how easy he was for them to lift them up, throw them around in the ring. they looked nothing like you. they were skinny and yet had muscles. their bodies were heaven’s made.

and then you saw how people - women - drooled under damian’s instagram posts. and you knew that one day he would leave you for one of them. they were pretty, models, something you weren’t.

damian had no idea your mind was playing tricks like that. if he knew, he wouldn’t let you go into this alone, he would be there with you, taking your pain away and fighting your demons, fighting for you.

you knew that and the idea of disappoint him made you even sicker.

the days he was away from work were the perfect days you had to work out, limit yourself with food and trying not to starve yourself. you started by following some easy work out on youtube, cutting out all carbs, drinking more water. things that seemed healthy to you.

but you weren’t getting the results you wanted so you pushed yourself even further. from skipping breakfast and dinner, from working out with damian’s tools - and hurting yourself multiple times because you had no idea how to use them - from drinking water over prioritising food.

you were slowly killing yourself and you didn’t even notice it.

but damian did. he saw the shift in your mood. how you went from being the normal you to being the always tired and hungry you. he noticed that someone used his gym to work out and he knew it was you but he also was aware of the situation you were in. he feared that if he spoke about it you would get mad or that he would trigger something in you, so he stayed quiet.

probably his worst mistake.

as time went by you saw small changes in your appearance. you lost weight, your face looked slimmer and your waist looked smaller but you were starving yourself to the point you would fall asleep everywhere because of the lack of energy you had.

one day as you were hanging out with rhea you were struggling to stay awake and remain focused on what she was saying. you skipped lunch, only eating an apple and drinking plenty of water. you workout for almost two hours before rhea got to your home.

and as she was talking you were trying stay awake but you couldn’t.

“…you okay?” rhea asked when she saw you dozing off.

“uh? yeah sorry i just need a little bit of water, keep talking” you laughed pretending everything is normal. but the moment you stood up from your couch, your legs began shaking a little and rhea was immediately standing next to you

“are you sure you’re okay?” she asked, her hand quickly checking your temperature.

“yeah no worries, i just need a little bit of water…” but two more steps and you fainted on the floor. rhea being able to catch you and trying to wake you up but you were laying there unconscious.

she quickly called 911, scared that you were sick or worse. she stayed with you during the whole ride to the hospital and while you were being checked out, she called damian, informing him that you were currently at the hospital.

damian was at the local gym with his brother when he got the call. panicking, it took him less than twenty minutes to ride to the emergency room. seeing rhea as she was waiting for some news, he ran towards her.

“what happened?” he was clearly panicking. not saying hello or how are you. he couldn’t care less at the moment, you were his priority.

“i don’t know…she fainted, she looked, i don’t know, tired? dehydrated? i don’t know how to describe it but she wasn’t the normal y/n i know…” rhea softly spoke to him but he immediately knew what was the problem. he closed his eyes, taking a deep breath otherwise he was going to explode.

he knew. he knew for all of this time and he didn’t say anything. fearing you would get mad or worse, but what was worse than having you in an hospital bed?

he cursed under his breath, trying to calm himself.

he was blaming himself. he knew it was his fault. if he said something. if he talked with you about it, you probably wouldn’t be laying down there.

but his mind stopped thinking the moment the doctor told him what he didn’t want to hear - you were definitely dehydrated, you haven’t eaten a proper mean in days, you’ve been overworking yourself and your body was sore from the too many hours you spent training.

“can i see her?” damian asked and immediately went to your room once the doctor told him that you were awake.

the moment damian saw your eyes, he couldn’t hold the few tears falling down his eyes.

he saw how you avoided his look and he was suffering for you.

slowly he sat on the bed next to you.

“baby…mi amor” he called you, looking at your face.

turning your head to him, you saw his teary eyes and you couldn’t control your own tears any longer.

“mi amor, why?” that’s all he wanted to know.

“i wanna be skinny” your broken voice whispered “i wanna be skinny so bad damian, you don’t understand how it feels…” but he did. he understood perfectly how you were feeling because he’s been there, in your position. he lost a lot of weight, he was a new person now and he knew the feeling of not being good enough for you or other people. he knew it was deeper for you, and if he could he would take all of your pain away but he knew he couldn’t.

his hand gently stoked your cheek, his thumb drying your tears away “baby, why? you’re so perfect the way you are…i love you so fucking much, why hurting yourself?” his tone was soft and sweet.

“but i don’t damian! i don’t love the way i am, the way i look, the way i make you look when we are out together…i’m not perfect and i wanted to be perfect, for you, for me…” your tears falling down your cheeks.

damian’s heart broke when you said those words. you were more than enough for him. but he knew that it was you who needed to see that, not him.

“starving yourself won’t make you perfect baby…te amo, te amo tanto and i wanna be here for you, i wanna help you mi vida” his lips gently touched your head “i wanna help you feel better, i wish i could take your own pain away…i wanna be the one fighting your battles, i wanna be here for you…”

his words cut deeper than a knife.

he loved you too much to see you suffering like that.

“i just wanna love myself…and it’s tiring, it’s tiring not being able to accept who you are. i wanna love me, i wanna look at myself in the mirror and say how pretty i am, i wanna fucking love myself but i can’t…” your truth coming out.

“it will take time baby, it will take time but you are not alone in this…i wanna help you, i wanna show you how beautiful you are, how deserving you are…you’re everything i want, everything i need and i can help you. you wanna lose weight? okay, but we’re gonna do it healthily, together. you wanna work out? i can show you…please don’t hurt yourself again like this. i hate seeing you suffering and hurting” he tried to smile with you but he couldn’t help the tears flowing down his face.

you were at loss of words “okay…okay, together” you whispered, trying not to choke on your own sobs.

“together baby…” he whispered kissing your head, making you smile against his skin “te amo mi vida, te amo” he smiled, leaving more kisses down your face, making you chuckle.

and damian kept his promise. no matter how busy he was with work, how tired he was after a long work out. he was there step by step with you. he worked out with you. he cooked dinner with you. he helped you relax and he helped you listen to your body. he broke the scale you had in your bathroom, saying how you didn’t need one because changes weren’t a number.

you didn’t need a number to tell you what you wanted to hear, you needed to hear it from inside - the growth, the healthy progress you made. all thanks to damian, the man you loved the most.

[thatbitchery]

2024 was such a year for me

Tried out tons of new things and failed at most if not all of them

Downsized my friendship group by about half

Completed Uni Double Bachelors (Yay Me)

Dropped language learning (literally this month) bc for whatt I don't even use the ones I know

Liquidated 2/3 of my assets and downsized my investment portfolio

Got into a relationship with a man I actually like (keeping in mind I'm a misandrist)

Got a tattoo

Left therapy (Was fired by my therapist lolol)

Had a little run in my career and decided MONTHS after grad it's not what I want and decided on a career change

Changed 100% of my aesthetic

Completed both CBT and DBT

Tried like 10 different "jobs" to find what I like (it worked yay)

Broke tons of my old patterns (mostly people pleasing)

Hit literally every single one of my 2024 goals

Got my IUD (When you get yours demand painkillers and whatever they call that numbing thing. DEMAND it. )

Broke my on and off relationship with social media yay

Built a relationship with food, money and clothes

2024 taught me how out centered I have been, which is funny considering I am one helluva selfish person. It's taught me when you give people free access to your time and energy they take advantage of it and take it for granted and use it to piss you off, even when you were trying to be helpful. It's taught me there is no payback in public service and no one takes something they got for free seriously, not even when they need it. It taught me you can be unhealthy and feel healthy and you don't need all that .it's taught me the importance of mastery sticking to what really brings you joy. It's taught me to trust myself more and just- jump in. It's taught me it's actually more unlearning than learning. It really was my Year. Messy and painful and crazy and all mixed up but I'm taking my greatest lessons yet. Got richer, smarter, more confident, hotter, happier, closer to myself.

Next year is 100% commitment to being self centered. 100%. Putting in more effort in my new career path and my masters and this relationship thing I'm doing and being focused because I spent most of my life in my head and dissociated. Making people earn my time and attention and expertise. Taking more risks and experiencing more life.

2025 is

Building a relationship with my emotions and my body

Being as self-centered as possible

Doing this Gf/ fiancée thing

Moving countries and building a whole new life

Building a relationship with finance (NOT the same as money)

Building myself up in this new career space

Sizing down and locking in on interests (Because my mind is everywhere. ADHD things)

Sizing down on the self destruction in search of adrenaline

Getting my masters

Those that started the year / blog last year with me i think can tell I have gotten more focused, calm, centered and based. Honestly shaking just thinking of what 2025 will look like.

Shout out me we did well ma. We did so well. 17 year old me would die if she saw us now. 23 year old me has NO idea how good it's about to get. 30 year old me I'm doing this so you can retire and live happily, will never let you down.

BMAC

[berberriescorner]

How would rio and y/n react if marcus brings a girl home?

Okay, so my imagination ran wild with this one. It's a bit lengthy, but hopefully you’ll enjoy it nonetheless. I’m glad to finally have gotten a bit of a creative spark. Hopefully, I’m not rusty. Please excuse any grammatical errors. This isn't heavily edited and I went with the flow. It would be greatly appreciated if you all love, comment, and reblog. Please understand (I know some get tired of hearing it but it’s important) that writing fanfiction takes time and dedication. Then there is the fact that it’s free. Tapping the love button is cool, but it’s the reblogs that help writers. Try to keep that in mind 💓.

Word Count: 3,500+

Warnings: A bit of fluff, laughter, and a little *cough, a hefty piece of* spice.

The aroma of garlic wafted through your newly renovated kitchen. It had been an early Mother's Day present from Rio and the babies. Your husband swaggered into the kitchen fresh out of the shower. He watched you stir the pasta and smiled as you made a mental note aloud to add more cream cheese. The deep timbre of your husband's voice startled you.

“Stay put mama. I'll grab some for you,” he rasped, lips brushing the side of your neck. His hand left a gentle squeeze on your hip.

“Damn it, Chris. Baby, I told you to stop sneaking up on me like that. I should've known your stealthy, fine ass was nearby. The scent of your cologne and body wash should've given you away.”

He stepped back over to the stove adding cheese. You shivered as his fingers danced up your spine, curling around to the front of you. You hummed as his hand lightly cupped your throat. As if your body knew exactly what he wanted, you tilted your head, angling it so he could gain access. Rio’s lips trailed light kisses up your neck, across the jawline.

“Food smells good, darling. When we eatin’?”

You chuckled, slapping at his hand as his finger dipped into the alfredo sauce.

“Boy! Get your fingers out of my pan.”

“Damn, ma! I can't get a little taste. Come on, mama. Daddy’s hungry,” he groaned.

“That's on you. Shouldn't have skipped lunch.”

Rio kissed his teeth, swatting your bottom playfully.

“You know I was handling business, sweetheart. Don't start,” he teased.

“Let that have been me not eating. You would've jumped in my shit.”

His head shook in disagreement, “Mm no. I would've just brought you some food and insisted you eat.”

“Last time I brought you lunch it turned into an argument.”

“Cause you don't listen. You know you weren't supposed to be anywhere near that warehouse. It was a matter of safety. Where that's concerned, you'll always come first, mama.”

You couldn't help but smile and roll your eyes at the sweet sentiment.

“Whatever, bossy ass. We’ll eat once the oldest baby boy gets here.”

“That's right it's our weekend,” he perked up.

Though there were times Rio wished he could see his son every day. He knew that Marcus was both his and Rhea’s pride and joy. Rio was thankful that they had a healthy co-parenting relationship. Joint custody had always been smooth with Rhea. She'd never dream of ever keeping their son away from his father. He was grateful that they both managed to move on. They both found love again, remarried, and everyone seemed to get along just fine. Rio loved that you and Rhea found friendship in one another. Your kids adored Rhea just as much as Marcus did you.

“Oh, you thought I was making this fire-ass pasta for you? Nope, Zaddy this for my oldest baby boy,” you teased Rio playfully.

“That’s fine! So long as I get to choose my dessert,” he rasped, his eyes scanning over your body.

Your eyes met, both nibbling at your bottom lip. Just as you were about to dive deeper into the topic, Alexa announced someone was at the front door. You tapped your phone screen, turning on the ring doorbell’s mic.

“Rhea, stop acting like you don’t have a key. Bring your beautiful self into this house.”

You smiled as she giggled her way through the front door.

“We’re in the kitchen,” Rio called out.

“Boy! Stop all that yelling. You wake that baby up and it’s your ass.”

Your husband kissed his teeth, “last I checked this was our house,” he mumbled, walking over to Marcus and pulling him into a bear hug. “What’s up, man?”

Marcus answered his question, immediately following with, “Can I go check on the baby? Where’s everybody else?”

“Rudeness. Are you forgetting something,” Rhea questioned her eager teenager.

She chuckled as he looked at her in confusion as she continued, “Your bonus mama is burning in this kitchen. Probably for you. Did you say hello? Or maybe thank you? Where is her loving,” Rhea jokingly scolded her son.

“Sorry, ma. He replied shyly, hugging you tightly and kissing your cheek. “Thank you for cooking my favorite food.”

“It’s cool handsome,” you started, pinching his cheek. “The kids are in the theater room and the baby is down for the night, but go on up and steal a little sugar.”

Just as he was about to excuse himself, Rhea interrupted him, “Not so fast young man. You’re not slick. Don’t you want to share the news?”

“Mami,” Marcus whined.

“That’s okay, I'll tell them. Go on, scaredy cat.”

Marcus made his escape as Rhea turned back to you and Rio. She bypassed him, linking her arm with yours.

“Come, chica. I’ve got some chisme for you.”

Your husband, the big baby he is, groaned, “Nice to see you too, Rhea. Why am I not included?”

“Are you not in the room? You are included, fool,” Rhea teased.

“Chris, baby. I love you, but hush. I'm trying to see some.”

Both women laughed at him as he rolled his eyes and went silent.

“ Marcus sat down with us sometime last week. Said he wanted to invite his lady friend over for dinner. Our baby has a girlfriend, sis.”

The two of you stared at one another, several seconds passed. As if he was expecting it, Rio sighed, running his hand down his face as the two of you started squealing like school girls.”

“Mama, Rhea, the baby,” he reminded the both of you.

You both clapped a hand over your mouths, silently giggling.

“What's her name? Have you met her? The parents?”

“Baby, chill,” Rio chuckled.

You looked at him, studying him for a moment. Head tilted, you questioned, “You already knew. Didn't you?”

He smirked, “You already know the answer to that, mama. You know I stay ten steps ahead.”

“He told you first,” Rhea questioned.

“Listen, he asked for advice on girls a while back. I suspected then he had his eye on somebody. I played it cool. If you ask too many questions, he’ll shut down. We had the talk. About a week after that. Marcus told me he was talking to someone.”

“The talk,” you and Rhea said in unison. “Should we be worried about where this is going?”

“Ladies relax. It's better to have it early. Just to be on the safe side.”

“You gave him condoms. Didn't you,” Rhea snarked.

“Are you ready to be a grandmother? I mean I’d be the coldest abuelo out here, but let's try to prevent that from happening.”

“He brought her home for dinner the other day. She's so sweet and shy. Her name is Isabella, but she goes by Isa. He's got his papi’s taste. She's Afrolatina, a beautiful young lady!”

“Okay! I see my boy! He found him a woman who embodies two of the most important women in his life,” Rio praised with pride.

“The mom seems to be well-rounded. Surely we don't have anything to worry about,” Rhea insisted.

“The both of you were sweet and shy when I first met you. Need I say more? Then there's those stories your mom told me about your teenage years,” he smirked toward you.

“Sneak one damn boy through your window and you never live it down. Kiss my ass, Christoper,” you cackled, flipping him the bird.

Rio puckered his lips, bending down, laughing as you mugged his forehead.

“Sis! Your ass was hot back in the day, huh?”

“Chill on my wife. Tell me, how old were you when we had Marcus?”

Rhea kissed her teeth, “He got a response for everything, huh,” she asked you. “Anyway! He wants you all to meet her. Can he invite her over for dinner tomorrow?”

Rio smiled at you bouncing on the balls of your feet.

“I take it our answer is yes, mama?”

After a stressful Saturday afternoon, Rio stepped into the foyer of his home. His eyes drifted shut for a moment as he welcomed the delicious smell of lemon herbs, and the smell of your perfume wafted through the air. Sandals tapped across the wooden floor, Rio’s lashes fluttered open, dancing at the sight of you meeting him at the front door.

“Hey Papa,” you started, smile faltering. You could sense the heaviness of his day. “Long day, baby,” you questioned.

His head tilted to the side, an appreciative smile playing at the corners of his mouth. Rio’s hands cupped your side pulling you into a tight hug as he buried his head in your neck. Breathing you in again, his lips tickled the sensitive spot behind your ear.

“Shit was hectic, but I’m sure some kisses would make me feel better,” he whispered in a sultry tone.

Your hands brushed against his chest, as you tip-toed to reach his lips. He chuckled at your struggle to reach his lips, meeting you the rest of the way. Your lips danced together in soft, slow strokes. The sound of footsteps speeding down the steps interrupted the lip lock.

“Ma! Pops! You’re not going to be doing all that in front of Isa, are you? Why’s it so quiet around here?”

You giggled as Rio reared his head back. “I’m sorry son, I didn’t know you paid bills around here. Y’all be forgetting this my house…our house,” he corrected when you lightly cleared your throat.

“Your siblings can be a lot. We wanted to have time to focus on getting to know your girlfriend. I managed to arrange a night with Nana. They’ll be back tomorrow. She can meet everybody next time we have her over. Don’t worry, baby. Papi and I promise to be on our best behavior,” you teased Marcus.

“I ain’t promising nothin’. Listen, I’ll kiss my wife all I want, bro. Don’t be mad I’m the only one getting kisses around here,” he joked, giving Marcus a playful shove.”

“Pops, chill on me. Who said I ain’t got it like that?”

Rio cackled, dapping Marcus up. The laughter between the two stopped abruptly when they saw you standing straight-faced, head tilted, and arms crossed.

“I’m pretty sure I can speak for your mother when I say this. You better be acting accordingly with that young lady. Nothing short of being respectful is acceptable. Understood?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

Your eyes landed on Rio, “Then I got you over here gassing him up.”

“My bad, mama. We’ll tighten up.”

“That’s what I thought,” you finished sauntering off to the kitchen.

 Rio turned back to Marcus and they both dapped each other up silently.

“It’s like that, son?”

“I learned from the best,” Marcus responded.

“My boy. Seriously though, not too much. Take things slowly. You have a lot of life to live. Don’t let thinking you're grown get you in trouble. You bring a baby home, and that’s ya ass. Papi can’t save you from the mama squad. If you can’t wait, do at least three things for me. Wrap it up, don’t do it in mine or your mom’s house, and don’t play with her feelings. You better plan on sticking around. Don’t be that guy, son. We’ve raised you better than that.”

“Yessir, I give you my word, pops.”

Rio embraced Marcus and gave his shoulders a firm squeeze as they pulled apart.

“You nervous,” Rio asked as the doorbell sounded.

“Just promise me you won’t let Ma pull out the photo albums.”

“Listen, I’m a man of many talents, but telling that woman not to do something almost always has the opposite effect. Ma listens when it counts,” he smirked, biting his lip.

“That’s information I honestly didn’t need to know, Dad.”

The first twenty minutes had been hilarious. You, Isa, and her mother all silently laughed at the way Isa’s father stumbled over his words while making introductions with Rio.

Apparently Marcus nor his girlfriend had taken the liberty of giving the poor man a heads up. He had suspected that he was going to assert himself as an overprotective father. One look at Marcus’ father and his bravado and puffed-out chest had deflated. Christopher wasn’t about to be checked by anyone and little did they know, neither were you. 

Dinner had gone by smoothly. The two of you succeeded in not embarrassing your son, as did her parents. Isa was a sweet, shy, and intelligent girl. You both loved her for Marcus. The teens had asked permission to have a movie night in the family theatre room. All parents agreed that it would be okay so long as it wasn’t unattended. You had even offered for Isa’s parents to join. Her father needed to finish up some work at home, and Rio along with Marcus, offered to drop her home in a few hours. 

As the parents you opted, to sit in the back row of home theatre seats to give them some sort of privacy. You didn’t want to crowd them too much. That and you knew with certainty that Rio was going to get handsy as soon as the lights dimmed. Twenty minutes of screen time had barely passed before his hand started a soft, tingling trail up your thigh. You allowed his fingers to make it inches away from the place he desired before swatting at him. His heated gaze met yours and the left corner of his mouth tilted up as he mouthed the word, “Why?”

Your head cocked to the side as you looked at him as if he were crazy. You sucked your teeth, pointing a finger in the direction of the kids. Rio wrapped his arm around your shoulders, bringing you closer to whisper in your ear, “Oh you really thought I was cold. You know why I pulled this blanket out, mama.” He laughed as you rolled your eyes, shoving him away from you. 

“Do that again and I’m sitting in my own lounger,” you sassed.

“All this space and you want to sit by yourself. Don’t be like that, mama.”

You had glanced in the direction of the children to see if they had overheard, but froze as you saw their hands inching closer to one another. Your hand tapped the top of Rio’s repetitively to get him to look. The two of you shared a smile at the innocence of the situation. Marcus looked back as the two of you tried to focus your attention elsewhere. The teen shook his head as his hand shifted away some. The two of you kissed your teeth and the sound echoed off the theatre walls as Marcus shook his head and Isa giggled.

It felt as if you had ruined the moment, and Rio attempted to correct the situation. Clearing his throat he asked the room, “Anybody want chips? Popcorn? Something to drink?”

You caught on and joined in, “I could go for some ice water and we can share a snack babe. Let’s go round up some refreshments.”

The kids had started to decline, but the two of you left in a hurry.

Rio propped himself against the kitchen island with his hands clasped. You crept towards your husband smirking. Your arms wrapped around his neck and you asked, “How much time should we give them to be unsupervised?”

“That depends, mama. Are you trying to be a responsible parent or a laid-back one? Responsible would be in the realm of maybe five or ten minutes. Laidback–about twenty or so.”

Rio’s hands traveled the length of your back, down to your plush backside. With a gentle squeeze, he continued, “I’m leaning towards laidback, mama,” he rasped. “Maybe we can take that time alone to–connect ourselves.”

“You truly have a one-track mind. We are not about to do anything with a guest in the house. Do you know what teenagers can do in twenty or so minutes?”

“Mama, what’s the most that could happen?”

“Our last child happened in twenty minutes, Rio.”

“We were pressed for time, and I was down bad for you that night, mama.”

“You’re always down bad for me. Even at this moment, you are.”

“No lies told. If you know that, stop playing. C’mere, mama.”

Rio nibbled at your neck, even as you continued to protest, “Rio, seriously. We should head back soon.”

“C’mon, mama. Let that boy cook for a few minutes. I told him to take things slow and to never do anything like that under his mom’s or our roof.”

“Oh, and you think that’s gon’ stop him?”

“Why wouldn’t it?”

“This is coming from the man, that was giving me backshots under his grandmother’s roof last Christmas.”

“We’re married with a ton of children. Trust and believe, she knows you’re getting handed pipe left and right, mama.”

“You get on my damn nerves. Always got a response–.”

The sentence came to a halt as Rio’s hand slipped into the opening of your dress, tugging a nipple through the silk material of your bra.

“F-fuck, Rio, don’t.”

His lips hovered over yours. The minty freshness of his breath fanning across your bottom lip. He nipped at it before asking, “You really want me to stop, mama?”

“Pantry, now.”

With those two words, Rio picked you up, legs wrapping around his waist, as he carried you to the destination. The door softly clicked closed, as he pressed you against some of the shelving. Your lips collided, tongues stroking one another, battling for dominance. The hem of your dress shifted upward, bunching at your waist. Rio groaned as his tented dark wash jeans ground against your damp panties. A moan slipped from your lips and he shushed you.

“Gotta keep quiet baby,” he whispered as his lips moved to suck at your throat.

His lips continued to nip and suck at your flesh. His long muscular fingers tugged your panties to the side as two fingers massaged your folds before gliding in to slowly stretch you out. The delicious feeling turned you into a whimpering mess as your hips began to rock against his movements.

“Yeah, just like that, mama. Are you gonna be my good girl and come all over my fingers? Yeah, you are. Aren’t you?”

He leaned in, tucking into the side of your neck, and whispered, “Bite down on my shoulder if you need to, darling.”

One of your hands slipped under his shirt as your nails scratched at his skin. You leaned back and pleaded, “Choke me, Daddy. Keep me quiet.”

The minute his hand wrapped around your throat, Rio added a third finger, thrusting in quick, deep strokes. His lips pecked your lips as he groaned, “Come for me, mama. Make a mess all over my fingers.”

All you needed was one last stroke to send you over the edge, but everything came to a halt as you both heard footsteps coming toward the kitchen. The two of you broke apart, fixing your clothes at the speed of lightning. The moment the knob to the pantry door turned, Rio snatched it open, pulling it closed with a bag of chips and a case of soda under his arm.

Marcus eyed his father suspiciously before speaking, “Isa got thirsty and you two were taking forever. So I came to get her some fruit snacks and a soda.”

Rio handed him a soda and explained, “We were coming back. Your pops negotiated a little alone time for ya. Did anything interesting happen?”

Marcus blushed a bit and responded, “Pops, can’t we talk about this later? I don’t want to keep Isa waiting.”

“You right man. Here take this soda and I’ll bring the fruit snacks and the rest of the stuff. Ma and I will be right in. She had to take care of something right quick.”

“Alright, Pops. Thanks.”

Marcus made it a few steps out of the kitchen before ducking his head back around the corner. Rio had started to turn back toward the pantry as he spoke up, “Pops? Tell Ma she can come out of the pantry now. Next time aim for a place that doesn’t house the food we eat.”

“Yeah, okay, wiseass. You’ll understand when you get older and have your own meddlesome ass kids. Take your lady her beverage and mind your business. You just couldn’t let your daddy cook in peace. Could you son?”

You were mortified and could barely look your bonus son in the eye for days.

Tagging some of my lovelies:

@darqchilddaydreamz @4everbrookemarie @starrynite7114

@amorestevens @bisexuallyattractivebitch @1andonlytashae

@rio-reid-whoreee @lovedlover @astoldbychae @percosim

@ravennaortiz @sunshine-flower @novaniskye @alertyoulikeitsamber @realhotgurlshit @abcdestinyyyy @jannavaire

[woso-dreamzzz]

Cookies

Laura Coombs x Reader

Summary: You bake a bit too much

It was a difficult line to walk.

Laura knew this.

She was an athlete. She needed to be on the top of her game. She fuelled her body with as much healthy food as she could source.

Which, sadly, meant that she almost always upset you.

"It's good," You teased as you took another batch of cookies out of the oven, waving them teasingly under her nose.

"I know they're good," She said stubbornly," It's your whole job. But I just can't eat them. The whole team is dieting. I can't be the one to break." That last bit was a little lie on her part but it was better than letting you down.

You scoffed. "One cookie won't kill you."

"Yeah but it's never just one, beautiful."

She was right, of course. You never did just give her one. You gave over the first cookie and then another and then another and then another until she had nearly eaten the whole batch and didn't go to the gym like she had planned.

You grinned at her, shrugging. "It's not my fault you like my cookies so much."

Laura rolled her eyes. "But it is your fault that you make them at home. Why can't you just make them at work?" She groaned and rested her head atop the marble countertop.

"Don't sulk." You swatted at her with your tea towel. "Eat some or stop whining. This is my kitchen. I bake what I want."

That statement had been the basis of your relationship for a long time.

The kitchen was your kitchen and Laura knew to stay well away when you were baking. Cooking dinner, she could interrupt you. She could hold you from behind and kiss your neck at any point she wanted when dinner was being made. But the kitchen was sacred when you baked to the point that you didn't even like sad people in it when you were mixing dough (claiming that their negative energy would affect how good your creations tasted).

Slowly, Laura reached out to snag a cookie from the cooling rack, biting into it morosely under your watchful eye.

"Good?"

"They're always good. Amazing, even," Laura replied, unable to keep a smile off her face.

"You should have another one."

She took it but narrowed her eyes. "I know what you're doing. This is the last one."

"Mhm," You nodded. You pressed a kiss to her lips. "Whatever you say."

You sauntered off to the fridge.

Laura ran her tongue over her lips.

You tasted like sugar.

●～●～●～●～

"Don't tell me you don't snack on her goodies whenever you can," Alex complained," Does she smell like cinnamon? She looks like she'd smell like cinnamon."

"Please don't talk about what my wife smells like," Laura said," It's a little weird."

Alex threw her arms up. "I'm just saying! She works in a bakery all day! It's the holiday season. Surely, she's working with cinnamon all the time?"

"Again, discussing what my wife smells like is weird," Laura said again," And if you must know, my whole house smells like cinnamon. She's baking like crazy. I don't understand it. All I want to do when I come home is curl up on the sofa and watch tv and she spends all day in a bakery and comes home to bake more. I just don't get it."

"Wow," Alex said sarcastically," Such first-world problems for you. A fit wife coming home to bake for you every day? Oh, no! How will you survive?"

"Shut up." Laura rolled her eyes. "My entire kitchen is covered in baked goods. Everywhere I look. Cookies. Cakes. I'm pretty sure last night she was making another pie. I'm trying to stay healthy."

Alex patted her condescendingly on the shoulder. "Then you shouldn't have married a baker."

Laura rolled her eyes again, spying movement to the left. It was kind of suspicious and Alex was grinning like a wolf. She turned and felt the need to smack that stupid, smug smirk off her friend's face.

"Mrs Coombs!" Jill cheered.

You greeted her warmly. You looked beautiful, wrapped up tight in Laura's coat with a hat tucked firmly on your head and a scarf curled around your neck.

You held two bags full of little brown boxes.

"Stop calling me Mrs Coombs," You scolded lightly though still with a smile on your face," It makes me feel old. I'm not old."

"You're more put together than most of us," Alex said as she crossed the room to hug you," Did you bring us treats?"

"Who do you think I am?" You scoffed, moving past her to join Laura, stealing a soft kiss.

You still tasted like sugar.

"My personal baker," Alex said with a grin.

"I'm no one's personal baker," You insisted though you pointedly kept your eyes on your wife," But you're lucky that the other Mrs Coombs likes to have counter space to sit on while I cook."

You placed your two bags onto one of the tables and began unboxing your treats.

"One at a time!" Laura barked when the girls surged forward. "Make an orderly queue please and thank my wife! She didn't have to trek all the way here in the cold."

"Thank you, baby," You said as the group finally calmed down, each girl taking a turn and pressing a kiss to your cheek in thanks.

"No problem, beautiful." Laura rose from her seat, a hand reaching out to curl around your waist.

You rested you head against her shoulder, smiling.

"What's got you so happy?"

"Nothing." But you were still grinning.

"No. Seriously, what is it?"

"It's just..." You giggled. "I thought you told me that the whole team was dieting and that's why you couldn't eat my cookies."

Laura's cheeks went a little bit red. "So...Maybe I twisted the truth a bit."

"You're cute when you're embarrassed," You said," But you know what this means?"

"And what does this mean, beautiful?"

You grinned and kissed your wife's cheek. "That you don't have an excuse to not be my taste-tester anymore."

[apollodarling-writes]

Hiii hiiii I'm here requesting a rindou headcanon because I absolutely FELL IN LOVE WITH YOUR WRITING skills I mean like damnnn💀 I love the way you think soo could you please do a rindou headcanon on:

1. What type of women/ girls he would be interested in ( kind girls,girly girls, emo)

2.what acts or traits make him fall in love ( showing kindness to others, giving sassy replies you get what I mean right 😌❤️)

3.what body parts are his favvvvv( of the reader obvio just wanna know if he's a boob or a ass guy💀)

4.and lastly what type of apperance would he be attracted to (cute girls, tall girls etc etc...)

And no pressure from my side take as long as you want I can wait for your reply it's really easy to get burned out even by writing for too long and take care of your self have a nice day ahead 🥹🫶🏻✨

-your loyal follower😌❤️

hihihi!!! thank you so much!! i absolutely adore rindou ,, he’s so lovely. i’m so glad to hear that you enjoy my writing :D i hope you enjoy these and i hope i answered your questions !!

what type of women would rindou be interested in?

i personality don’t think rindou would have a set type. he’s the type to “like what he likes, and doesn’t what he doesn’t.” i do, however, think that he does have a pattern. i think he’s drawn to the more ‘innocent’ type. that doesn’t go to say someone who’s never had sex, someone who’s never done anything wrong in their life, or someone who’s is naive and too trusting. it’s more so someone that is the opposite of him. someone who’s never been in a fist fight and needs him to protect them. someone who is kind and mindful of their actions. someone who he sees as ‘pure’ — even if that isn’t actually the case at all.

i can also see him being drawn to someone who is independent, but is the clingy type when it comes to a relationship. i think he would like to feel needed. definitely not the smothering type — i think that is going too far for him, but sanzu would definitely be into that (he is the smothering type).

i also fully believe that rindou would want someone who he can come to about his problems — maybe not bonten problems since he keeps you away from that, but everything else that inconveniences him. sanzu was being a freak, mikey is always so broody and bossy, ran is a dick, this guy he was on a train with a few years ago snipped a piece of his hair off and he’s still pissed about it… are you seeing my image?

definitely wants a romantic type too. someone who would cook him his favorite meal just because they missed him or they remembered something small he said he liked and bought it for him. someone who spends hours handcrafting things for their anniversary.

i think rindou would also like someone who matches his eating habits. i don’t think you have to be as healthy as he is, but i think he would prefer that his cabinets aren’t full of junk food. i headcanon that it’s more of an effort for him to avoid it, and he dislikes it because it fucks up his physique. he definitely indulges every so often, but not frequently.

i also see him being attracted to intelligence and someone who can yap to him. i fully believe that it would be the ‘okokokokokok’ x ‘lalalalalala’ dynamic. and the ‘sunshine’ x ‘grumpy’. i can also see him being into the shy type.

what acts or traits make him fall in love?

i mentioned in the last section that rindou finds kindness attractive, so definitely kindness. maybe someone who doesn’t know when to give up? i think he would be very… standoffish when he is interested in someone — for lack of a better term. he would get very flustered (though, he’d rather die than admit it) and be very curt. so, someone who would continue to chip at his barriers would be best and i think he would really appreciate it too.

when it comes to falling in love, i think it would be very hard to make rindou fall in love with you. i headcanon that during the bonten arc, hes very detached — which is the exact opposite of my hcs for ran btw. he doesn’t want connections with people because it can be a liability — people who hold grudges could use you against him. they could hurt you. god forbid that ever happens… he’d go off the deep end.

with that being said, i think its persistence, honesty, transparency, kindness, and initiative that makes rindou fall in love. does that make sense?

favorite body parts?

to answer your question between ass or tits, he would totally be an ass guy. you can’t look at him and say tits. he’s the type to give you a hug and grab a handful or stick his hands in your back pocket. he also likes doggy and pronebone because of this too btw !! totally an ass guy.

for other parts of the body, i think lips, hands, and neck would qualify too.

he would love the way your lips quirk into a smile or tug into a pout, he way your lips feel on his, and the way your smile makes him smile. i think he would like your hands because while he’s not as touchy as some of the other bonten members, he does enjoy holding your hand — or if you’re the fidgety type, he likes it when you fidget with his fingers. i also fully believe that rindou loves when you touch him ever so softly — tracing his features, caressing his knuckles, the way you patch him up all gently while you scold him after a particularly rough mission. for neck, i headcanon that he’s fond of neck kisses and that he also likes to guide you by gripping the back of your neck. there’s also.. more nsfw reasons that he likes these part but those are for another time!

what type of appearance would he be attracted to?

i don’t think rindou would be into girls taller than him right off the bat, but if he falls in love with you , then he does really care. i think he gravitates towards people who are shorter than him — even if it’s only by a centimeter, he’ll use it against you. calling you stuff like ‘chibi’ or ‘shortstack’ or ‘little girl’ (in a playful manner !! not a kink way). other than that, i don’t think he would have a preference.

[ghostiequill]

Sanji x anxious eater reader

No, shut up this is not me projecting (but i know he'd be so sweet about it)

You have a troubled relationship with eating your whole life

No one was the pinpoint cause of it, but seeing all the other people with their ripped abs and perfect hourglass figures caused hesitation everytime you decided to indulge yourself in food

With your sweet tooth, it was even more difficult. Everything delectable delight you would indulge yourself in, you felt a tsunami of guilt afterwards staring at the empty wrapper, devastated at your lack of control

When you decided to join the Straw Hats, you were shocked to see how forward the cook was, despite how you felt about your figure. He would constantly gush over you, how well you fought, bending to your will and would lather you in constant compliments 

The problems came when he tried to spoil you with his cooking, he would go out of his way to serve you first, despite the various teasing protests by the rest of the crew . Every bite was sinful in every sense of the word, the flavors dancing on your tongue as you swallowed both it and the anxious feelings threatening to bubble up. You could feel your stomach rebelling against the contents as you excused yourself early from dinner, not the first time

Unknownst to you, Sanji was hyper aware of your presence on board. He would notice every time you would leave the table early and the smaller portions you would give yourself compared to every else’s, your furrowed brow and anxious looks when he would cook something more decadent for you

He finds you alone one night after he finishes tidying his kitchen and kicking out Luffy for attempting to steal leftovers. He walks up to you gently laying a hand on your shoulder to try not to spook you.

“Hey, are you ok?” He asked

You forced a smile, “Yeah, why wouldn't I be?”

“If there's anything you want to talk about, you can come to me. We’re a crew, we can confide in each other, you know that right?” Sanji’s eyes are full of concern as he squeezes your shoulder 

“Of course, I know that. You've always been so sweet to me, I really feel like we’re a family here” You claim

“I've just noticed you seem really anxious around food, anything I can do to alleviate that pain for you I will do in an instant” Sanji says, his voice eager to please and full of care 

“…It's just been really hard sometimes. I can't help but feel every calorie that passes my lips and I feel like I haven't done enough to earn it”your eyes looking anywhere but his as you force out the confession

Sanji looks taken aback, grabbing your shoulder and gently making you face him.  “You don't have to earn food. You need calories to do things you love. Your body deserves to be nourished and cared for. You don't earn the right to eat. Every meal is an opportunity for self care. There's no conditions to self love. Food is a vital source of life and love that we shouldn’t take for granted. It is my sworn duty as your friend to help protect you from any enemy, including yourself. If you’ll allow me, I can do my best to help” 

Your eyes are full of tears as you finally break down, head in your hands as you start crying. Sanji doesn't say anything else as he rubs your back

The next day for breakfast, he prepares for you an easier meal of eggs and sausage, healthy but still getting in vital calories. It’s like that for every meal, just for you. He would gently introduce richer ingredients in your meals, easing you in with words of affirmation, small touches and toothy smiles

You couldn't help but feel the love prepared with every meal prepared specifically for you and witness Sanji’s affection and see his smile with every bite. 

The following days were filled with nothing but affection, tender gestures, and thoughtful culinary choices. Through his actions, he conveyed a deep love of your body and soul, easing you into a life of indulgence.

[taintandviolent]

Thankful ; Jimmy Darling x Reader

summary: 🦃 It's Thanksgiving, and the troupe is enjoying a collaborative dinner. You're sat next to Jimmy Darling, who you've been flirting with on and off for the past week. After dinner, you discover that he's still hungry.

word count & w a r n i n g s: 1.9K! | food mention, mentions of arousal (both male and female), semi-established relationship, semi-public making out and cunnilingus.

a/n: requested by @american-horror-whore! I hope this was everything you wanted bby!! thanks for the request, I so so so missed writing for my boy. also happy early thanksgiving to my followers!! i'm super thankful for all of you guys! divider by @/strangergraphics

↓ full fic under cut! ↓ / ao3 link here! / I don’t have a taglist anymore, but please turn on post notifications if you’d like to be notified of future fics!

It’s Thanksgiving, and you’re feeling mighty thankful. That was for sure. You scoop the last bit of sweet potato casserole into your fork, smiling over at Eve as she recounts one of her favorite stories from days past. You’d been a member of the show for a month now, but they’d wasted no time in making you feel like you’d been there since the beginning. You’d found a specific sort of camaraderie there, the kind that only comes from shared experiences and understood feelings. It must be similar to a sort of sorority or something.

Jazz drifts from the record player in the corner, serenading everyone with a relaxed romanticism. The wooden table is stuffed with dishes; almost everyone had pitched in to make something for the dinner. You’d made the stuffing, and helped Ethel with the turkey. As a little extra decoration, you’d gathered some of the fall leaves and scattered them along the table, which paired nicely with the candles that Elsa had brought in from her tent. Everyone was in good spirits, but especially Jimmy Darling, who, like everyone, had been indulging in a little of his mama’s hooch.

He’s drunk, his complexion flushed and healthy. He keeps leaning into you, letting one of his large hands make a fist in your skirt, hiking it up and tugging it towards him. You scoot closer – as close as you can without being on his lap. Your cheeks hurt from smiling so hard, but you can’t help it; the butterflies that he gives you take control of your system the second he’s in the room.  

“Hey dollface,” Jimmy suddenly murmurs next to you. “Pass the pie, would ya’?” 

“Only if you cut me a piece too, Jimmy…”

You don’t wait for an answer before pushing yourself up off the bench just enough to reach the plate of pumpkin pie, carefully sliding your hand underneath the ceramic dish. Desiree had baked it along with the sweet potato casserole that afternoon and you were fairly certain that everyone had been eyeing it the entire dinner. The top of the pie was a perfect orange, glazed and delicious, while the crust was a delicious looking golden brown. To top it off, it was still warm. 

You set the pie in the space between you, smiling politely at Jimmy as he got to work cutting out a slice with his fork. The first one goes to you with a bright, crooked smile; he was always such a thoughtful, handsome gentleman. Admittedly, that was part of the reason that you two had been courting each other for a week now, secretly meeting to kiss and explore each other’s warm bodies in the dead of night. You weren’t embarrassed of him, nor shy, but he was very aware of the rest of the troupe’s prying eyes, specifically Elsa’s and thought it better if for now, you two kept things quiet.   

Eve’s eyes flit to yours, a tender smile on her lips. You think she knows, but she’s got enough sense not to say anything. You blink slowly and turn your attention back to Jimmy, who has his hand on your bare thigh now, fingering the silky hem of your nylons. Underneath the table, you toy with Jimmy’s ankle, rubbing your own against it and lifting the pant leg. He lets out a little moan through closed lips – inaudible to everyone but you – and squeezes the meat of your thigh. With a mean poker face, Jimmy takes a forkful of the pie and shoves it into his mouth. To everyone else, he just looks a little buzzed – which he is. But to you, he looks buzzed and horny; from the way those brown eyes are half-lidded and heavy to the way his jaw hangs slack every time he looks over you, scanning your body and kneading your thighs like dough. You pick up the tiny nuances of his arousal and gobble them up as quickly as you do the pie. 

The rest of the dinner goes on with laughter and shared stories until Elsa announces that she must get her sleep. Ethel stands up to begin clearing the empty dishes. You get to your feet and help her, knowing full well that she intended to do it all herself. 

Once you finish, you head out of the main tent, wiping your hands on the back of your dress. Everyone’s dispersed. Jimmy’s gone – probably stumbled back to his trailer in a drunken food coma. You laugh to yourself and head back to your caravan. 

Just as you pass his trailer, Jimmy emerges from the shadows, a flash of skin as his conjoined fingers wrap around your smaller wrist with ease. “No, no… where do you think you’re goin’, sweet face?” He tugs you back towards his trailer. “Baby, c’mere…” 

His back hits the metal exterior of his caravan with a thud and he pulls you atop of him, wrapping both his arms around your lower back. Maybe it was fate, maybe it was coincidence. Whatever it was, had put your trailers next to each other the day you’d rolled in. That made it very easy for you two to canoodle whenever you wanted without attracting too much attention. 

Hidden in between the two trailers, amongst the sound of rustling grasses and distant cars, you press your lips against his plush, pink ones and dive in. Kissing Jimmy is like licking the inside of a honey pot; it’s addicting, warm and the saccharine notes of his kisses coat your tongue. Every single time. You fall into the familiar rhythm of kissing him, grinding your hips back against his as he urges them into yours. You’ve been here before, many times in the last seven days, but it hasn’t gotten old yet. 

Your nimble fingers reach up, pulling the shirt buttons from their slits until you reach his belly button, and stop, too distracted with the way he’s kissing you to continue. “Oh, Jimmy,” you say against his skin.  The chill of the November air contrasts with the heat that rolls off his bare skin.

“I’m still hungry,” he growls into the curve of your ear, peppering feverish kisses along the nape of your neck. You can’t help but chuckle softly as you lean your head to the side, amused that at a time like this, Jimmy’s thinking of food. With your hands planted firmly on his pectoral muscles that are exposed through his half-open shirt, you gently push him off and look into his coffee black eyes. 

“Well, Jimmy, there’s plenty of leftovers – you should’ve eaten more! We can –” 

“No, baby. Not that kind of hungry.” His hips punctuate his sentence as he drives them into the soft flesh of your upper thigh. 

Feeling the rigid bulge against your thigh, your breath catches in your throat. You reach down and pull his head off of you, his lips still poised to kiss. You let out a giggle and move your hands down his neck. 

“Yours or mine?” You ask, flipping the collar of his shirt between your fingers. 

“We’re facing yours.” 

Bracing yourself against his trailer, you push yourself off of it, and grip the collar of his shirt like a leash on a dog, towing him in the direction of your quaint little caravan. You carefully walk up the steps and throw open the door, muttering a word of warning to not trip. He does anyway, too drunk and too horny to watch his feet. 

As soon as you’re inside, Jimmy’s got his hands wrapped around your waist and he doesn’t hesitate before lifting you up onto the small kitchen counter. Giving you room to sit, he pushes the tins of coffee and tea back against the wall. His hands slip underneath the fabric of your dress, ghosting along the curve of your ass and to the roundness of your thighs, his fingers leaving trails of heat everywhere they go. 

“Mmm, baby, you feel like you’ve got a fever. Your body’s on fire…” 

You hum, adjusting your hips on the counter. “There ain’t a single person to blame for that besides you, Jimmy….” 

He chuckles and lets his hands continue their journey, sweeping around to the front of your kneecaps, which he gently pulls apart. His inky hues connect with yours as he slowly lowers, getting to his knees in front of you. You watch him with quirked lips, indicating amusement, though your eyes are bleeding lust. 

Jimmy takes your dress in his hands, lifting it up to expose your center. The satin of your panties is already stained with arousal. It’s leaking into the fibers and creating a wet spot.

“Hooo’, baby… look at that.” His smile is proud, delighted that he’s responsible for it. 

“I hope you saved room.” You tease. 

“Oh, honey…” Jimmy runs his thumb along the clothed slit, and you shiver. “I always have room for dessert.” 

His fingers hook around the elastic of your panties and yanks them down. He leaves your garter belt on, as it poses no nuisance to him. Now free of fabric, your cunt clenches visibly as he nears her. His lips part, pressing an open mouthed kiss to your slick folds. Your hand snaps to his shoulder, gripping it hard. “Fuck, Jimmy… I…” 

Your hand moves to gather the dress of your skirt up, pinning it in place. The other hand finds a home in Jimmy’s soft, brown locks, pulling tight as his tongue laps at your cunt with a flat tongue. You mewl happily. What a sight; your nylon-covered legs over the shoulders of the most handsome man you’d ever met, his head buried between your thighs. 

His tongue flexes, points, and flicks at your quickly swelling clit. You shudder and clamp your legs around his head, a full body reaction. “Huh… Jimmy… oh my god.” 

He kisses her again, his tongue stretching down to meet your leaking entrance. Now he’s the one vocalizing; you’re sweet, pink and wet and he can’t help himself. Another kiss, but he closes his lips around your clit to suck on it gently. 

He pulls away, just for a second to ask: “Feel good?” 

You nod hurriedly and tighten your grip in his hair, pulling his head back and forth onto your cunt. Your middle finger twirls around a single curl and you hum a string of expletives, forcing his tongue deeper into your folds. 

“Mm! – yeah! – baby! –” Jimmy says in between your forced thrusts. He’s not used to you taking control like that, but like hell he’s going to complain. 

The white hot coil in your stomach winds tighter, creating an inexplicable pressure in your lower abdomen. Jimmy’s relentless, as if he knows this, and keeps at it. Not that you had any plans of loosening your grip on his locks. Mirroring your strength, Jimmy’s hands grip your thighs tight, pressing them open as far as they’ll go. You throw your head back and a deep moan escapes your lips, expelling some of the built up tension. 

“Fuck, fuck… Jimmy… right there… right there….” 

Jimmy suckles your swollen clit, and brings one hand to your entrance, teasing an intrusion with the tips of his fingers. They breach it, just enough to make your whole body tense up, and the coil snaps. All at once, you buck your hips forward, forcing Jimmy’s digits inside your cunt, his nose bumping into the flesh above her. He feels every shuddering clench, and rides it out, lapping at her like an ice cream cone. 

Once the slick pulses subside, he pulls back and brings his palm to his face, wiping his glistening chin. For a second, he admires it, tilting his hand back and forth, watching as the collected spit and arousal catches the light. 

“Mm-mm-mmm! Now that’s something to be thankful for, baby.”

Through labored pants, you mutter a response. “Oh, I’ll show you thankful, baby. Get on the bed.” 

[calicoheartz]

Omg Nika headcannons from you would be AMAZINGGGG she’s so gf

𝐍𝐈𝐊𝐀 𝐌Ü𝐇𝐋 𝐆𝐈𝐑𝐋𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐃 𝐇𝐂𝐒

꣑୧ — summary | just nika muhl as your girlfriend !!

— warnings | pure fluff !! nsfw @ the bottom , read at your own risk

my master list ㇀♡

a/n : yippeeee I’m finally writing for our croatian baddie !!! tysm for requesting and enjoy ! ◡̈

romantic gestures

we alllll know our girl is a romantic @ heart ! she loves planning candlelit dinners , stargazing dates , and giving you flowers every chance she gets just because !

you mean the world to her so she will always be looking for ways to show her love and appreciation for you 💌

physical activity (?) together

she lovessss being active with you !!! Whether it’s playing basketball (her personal fav) going on runs , or trying out new sports , she loves the bond that comes from shared physical activity ◡̈

heartfelt conversations

I feel like Nika would value deep , meaningful conversations.

she loved staying up late and talking about their dreams , fears , and everything in between.

she believes strong and concise communication is key to have a strong and healthy relationship 💗

affection

she is soooo protective over you !! she always wants to make sure you’re comfortable or safe (even if it means socking someone in the face)

&& our girl ISNT shy about showing affection ! Best believe her hand is always somewhere on your body. Whether your hands are intertwined or her hand is glued to your thigh , she loves having you near her !

random hcs !

she loves surprising you with little gestures like leaving sweet notes in unexpected places , planning surprise dates , or bringing home your favorite food & snacks !

I feel like she’d really enjoy adventurous dates that can range from climbing to hiking , as she loves experiencing new things especially if it’s with you 😋

LOVES cooking with you !! Best believe you’re often spending evenings in the kitchen , experimenting with new recipes , and sharing a glass of wine together. It’s your special time to connect and unwind :)

you both are each others biggest cheerleaders , always their to support your dreams and ambitions.

makes personal playlists for you !! Each playlist is carefully curated to reflect your relationship, filled with songs that remind her of you and your shared experience

she’s 1000% a dom. argue w a wall. I know she just loves the idea of taking care of you , ofc you want to please her as well but your pleasure is her top priority!

is a strap girly 10000% . will use her fingers if necessary but she swears she can feel u w her strap on

rough sex ??? (will be soft if asked / needed)

gets jealous super easily & is lowkey rlly possessive of u

I hc her as a service top , again ur pleasure > anything

overstimulation galoreee

one word ; her hands.

yayaya im so excited to begin writing more for nika ! rest assured , there’s more fics on the way ◡̈ thanks again for reading ◡̈

[number1jeonginstan]

HEYYY

My first time sending in an ask as an anon to you...sorry I haven't sooner.

Can we have a skz fluff (as your bf-established relationship) reacts to girlfriend who is a dancer (preferably ballet but if it's hard to write for if you don't do it, it can be general) who overworks herself trying to get something right, but she just can't get it and is getting irritated? Possible angst if some of the argumentative boys wanna argue her instead of comfort.

TYSM AND I LUV UR WORK

A/N: I’m so glad I could write for you!!! I really hope you like it, I tried doing my research and using my amazing ballet skills (aka watching the Nut Cracker since I was little) to try and describe it more!

WC: 1.4k

Warnings: None, just fluff and a bit of angst, but everything gets resolved!

Chan: 

You were in your studio, trying to perfect a sissone sur le point, and you kept messing up. As you slid onto your pointe, you kept slipping and you were frustrated. As you tried again, you fell to the ground, eliciting a groan from your lips. 

You had been at it for a while, barely taking a break to even drink a sip of water. You had no idea truly how long it had been as the only window in the studio was secluded. It wasn’t until you heard a knock on the door. “What!” you yelled, still frustrated from not getting it. 

“Y/N, are you okay? You’ve been in here for 4 hours.” It was then when you registered truly how long you’ve been practicing for. “Oh, I didn’t realize” you sighed, finally taking a sip of your water. “You can’t be doing this, it’s not healthy” he sighed kissing your forehead. 

“I don’t really think you should be talking Channie, you are usually cooped up in your studio working and barely ever sleeping,” your voice coming off a bit more condescending than you meant it to be. 

“Hey, I know I do that, but at least I take a break. You haven’t been on your phone since you entered here, I should know, I texted and called you multiple times.” 

“You did?” you asked, not believing til you checked for yourself. “Yes, now please take a break, eat something with me. You won’t get it unless you take a break and reflect, and get something in your stomach.”

You just nodded, taking his hand as you both exited the studio. You were grateful to have him to make sure you don’t overwork yourself, hugging him from the side and kissing his cheek. 

“What was that for?” he giggled, placing a peck on your lips. “Just because,” you grinned. 

Lee Know: 

You had spent at least two hours in the studio trying to perfect your gargouillade, you were struggling, constantly annoyed by how you were doing it, but it wasn’t looking clean. Again, you told yourself, and you could feel your muscles tensing. You just had to perfect it by the end of the day and make it look clean, but you kept failing. 

You gave up, laying on the floor, tired of exerting your body for two hours straight. Anger was ridden on your face. Minho entered the studio giggling, holding a container filled with japchae for the both of you, only to see the anger on your face. 

“Is everything okay?” he asked, setting down the food next to your bag on the bench. 

“No!” you shouted, still not wanting to get up. “I don’t know why I can’t get it to look good” you groaned, placing your hands on your face. 

“Maybe you need a break, overworking yourself will only make it worse baby,” he said while kissing your head, “not to mention so sweaty.” 

“But I have to get it perfect, I don’t know how you get your dances perfect the first time you try, it’s so unfair.” 

“Y/n, first off I don’t, secondly, I practice a much different medium than you. Yours takes much more core strength, and to build that,” he runs over, bringing the japchae with two forks to you, “is to eat good food.” 

 “Don’t worry, you will get it, I believe in you, now please eat.” He held a fork of the food in front of your face and you caved in, taking a bite as he fed it to you.

Changbin: 

“YAH!” you heard a yell from behind you, “do you know how much you’ve been overworking yourself?” 

Before you could even say anything, Changbin had thrown you over his shoulder, stopping you in the middle doing your hops en pointe. “Put me down!” you yelled, smacking Changbin’s ass in hopes he would. 

“Nope, take a break, your muscles will get too sore if you do this!” He yelled back, placing you in his lap. Before you could protest, he began massaging your calves, eliciting a groan from you. 

“See, I told you your muscles are tense, from now on you should listen to me” he grinned from ear to ear as you just nodded. 

Maybe all you needed was a quick break and a massage from your loving, but loud boyfriend. 

Hyunjin: 

You were on the floor, practicing your arabesque penche, trying to make sure you were not falling or tilting to either side. Your body needed to be stable, and you couldn’t possibly get it down. 

Hyunjin came into the room clapping for you, causing you to fall down. “What was that for!” you yelled, not meaning to raise your voice or your temper.

Hyunjin looked startled by your reaction and profusely apologized. “Shit, I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to distract you.”

“No, I’m sorry I’m just really frustrated” you sighed, walking over to him and peppering his face with kisses. “It’s okay, I understand, now go back to dancing, I want to draw you looking beautiful” as he took out his sketchbook and pencil eliciting a giggle from your lips. 

Jisung: 

You were frustrated out of your mind, unable to complete your move properly, making you a bit angry. You just wanted to curl into a ball and never do ballet again at that moment. Han had decided to enter the studio at that exact time. 

He saw you curled up and decided to lie down next you. You didn’t notice he was there until you opened your eyes, flying back to see him. He erupted into a fit of giggles, “I didn’t mean to scare you, baby,”

It caused you to start laughing as well, being next to him while you both erupted into giggles was exactly what you needed to take your mind off of everything.

Felix:

“I can’t do this anymore!” you groaned while Felix came in beside you. “I’ve been trying for hours and I haven’t gotten it down.”

“What if I dance next to you, I bet I would look really good in tights,” Felix said, trying to imagine himself in a pair. “What, you don’t have to do that?” you quickly replied, not wanting him to struggle with you.

“But whatever we do, we do together, right? So come on, let me do this with you, or you can do it perfectly now and we can go home and eat brownies.” 

That was all the motivation you needed to try one more time, and you got it. “Felix, I finally did it!” you shouted, running into his arms. “I told you, you can do anything, you just have to get out of your head at times,” he said, kissing your face with a smile.

Seungmin: 

“If you don’t want to do it anymore, you should just quit. It’s only 16 years of your life down the drain,” Seungmin told you, watching you struggle. 

You had been complaining for hours that you couldn’t get your sissone sur le point to look right. It was too difficult and very few people could do it perfectly. “I can do it, stop bringing me down,” you groaned trying it once again. 

“Come on, you are the one who said you just wanted to quit, so quit.” Seungmin said out loud, trying to get a rise out of you “I don’t know why you are trying if you know you are going to fail anyway.” 

That was all the motivation you needed, you needed to prove him wrong. You had tried once again, finally successfully doing it. “Ha!” you screamed “In your face Kim Seungmin!” 

He just laughed “Finally, now can we please go before we miss our movie?” 

Jeongin: 

“Can I try with you?” he asked. “Are you sure, I don’t want you to hurt yourself.” You were confused, you were stuck on the same move for days, constantly crying to Jeongin about how you couldn’t get it down. 

“Just show me one more time, please?” 

You did, landing perfectly. “I did it! Wait, WHAT!” you yelled, tingling Jeongin’s eardrums. 

“I told you, sometimes you just have to leave that pretty brain of yours.”  

[mochamamii]

yandere!nct: you try to unalive yourself.

▹ a/n: hello loves, I can’t remember if I’ve written something like this before but I wanted write something a little darker today but soon I will force myself to write some fluff I promise lol.

▹ pairing: yandere!nct x reader

▹ triggers: self-harm, readers attempts to unalive themselves, kidnapping, forced relationships

▹ warning!: I can’t stress enough how triggering this might be, I get descriptive at certain parts and I strongly urge you to consider whether this is something you want to read, this is dark and not my normal writing. please prioritize your own well-being and do not read this if it will influence you in anyway, I have lots of other lighter reads 💕

Taeil won’t let it get this far. Taeil loves you deeply and wants only the best for you no matter how demented it appears to others. He dotes on, and nurtures you like his life depends on it, carefully crafting your meals and your routine to keep your mind and body healthy. If something like this were about to happen, he would be able to foresee your declining mental state and hopefully prevent any attempts. Taeil would do everything in his power to keep you safe and he’d do his best to make you as comfortable as possible. He’d even consider letting you go if it meant saving your life.

“How could you do this to yourself? Don’t I take care of you well?”

Johnny is always calm and collected, even when he’s pissed off, a stranger wouldn’t be able to tell the difference, he always keeps the same mask on, never giving you any idea of what he’s thinking inside his head. Until now that is…He comes home to find you on the bathroom floor. At first he thought you must’ve slipped, hitting your head and knocking yourself out in the process, not that it had been done intentionally. Johnny is at a loss of what to do, it’s one of the few times he’s not sure what to say or do to fix this. He usually has a witty comeback to lighten the mood but he knows now isn’t the time. He helps fix you up, cleans the wound on your head, and tucks you in bed. Anytime you part your lips to speak he’ll shush you. The two of you will probably sit in silence for a while until he can figure out how to address this.

“It’s okay, shhh…Just rest, save your energy. We’ll talk about it later.”

Taeyong is an angry mix of emotions. He’s known for at least a week now that you somehow managed to obtain poison. He theorized that you must’ve used cleaning supplies to mix a cocktail of chemicals, he found you hiding your stash under the bathroom sink. He assumed your plan was to use it on him, simply out of curiousity and amusement he wanted to see if you were actually capable of trying to kill him so he didn’t address it. He wanted to see how far you’d go to leave him. He waited and waited, but he never noticed anything different. He already had cameras installed in your shared apartment to watch you while he was away, he hoped to find you tampering with his food in a botched attempt to poison him. But still, nothing ever came of it. Until suddenly, you were the one who fell sick. His worry turned to anger as he arrived home one night to find you on the floor of the bathroom, the mixture of poison lying next to you.

“Are you insane? What were you trying to do, kill yourself? Do you think that will work, because I promise you, nothing…not even life itself will keep me from you. Don’t ever do something stupid like this again.”

Yuta feels remorse. It’s one of the few and probably only times Yuta will ever feel this way. Out of everyone, Yuta is one of the most intense and dangerous yandere’s, but he still loves you in his own twisted way. He likes to push your buttons and torture you a little but he’d never kill you…probably. For Yuta, part of the fun is seeing how badly you want to live, how badly you want for him to release you and return to your old life. When he arrives home to find you on the floor, a dark crimson pool of blood surrounding you he panics, all the color draining from his face as he sees your barely conscious body. He’ll clean you up, bandaging your wounds, he’ll monitor you for a few days wondering if he should take you to a hospital. In those few days as he waits to see if your condition worsens he’ll be super gentle, much more gentle with you than he’s ever been. His hands will run over all the old scarred skin where he’s cut you in different places before, a deep pang in his chest screaming at him for doing that to you. He’ll be soft with you, but he can’t help but still poke fun at you in an attempt to get you to talk to him.

“Hey, couldn’t you wait for me? At least I know when to stop, clearly you’re still an amateur…You could’ve really hurt yourself. What would I do then, huh?”

Doyoung is angry. At you, but mostly himself. He likes to believe that he knows you better than you know yourself. To come home and find you in the middle of attempting to harm yourself he will realize just how little he truly knows about you and your condition. Initially the only emotion he can really process is anger, the thought of coming home a second too late and losing you enraged him. Even while angry, he was solid as rock, never giving you much of a clue about what he was thinking. He will carefully nurse you back to health, never leaving your side not even for a second. Once you begin to recover he will experience heartbreak and grief over what could’ve happened. Doyoung won’t address the incident much and will from then on refer to it as the ‘incident’ he wants to pretend that it never happened. He’s a stubborn man and his behavior towards you might not change much, if anything he gives you less freedom, afraid to let you leave his side.

“Never do that again. Hate me. Hate me all you want to, but never do that again. Please.”

Jungwoo is distraught after finding you in such a state. He’s in disbelief and this is a rare occasion in which he is truly afraid. Afraid of what could’ve happened to you and what might happen again in the future if he’s not careful. It flips a switch in him and forces him to realize something that he cannot shake. That he might not just need to protect you from the world but from your own self too. He becomes distrustful of you, scared and afraid that you might try to hurt yourself again. There’s no amount of convincing or promises in the world that will put his mind at ease. This fear will drive him to act irrationally, he’s not above strapping you to a bed all day while he’s gone if it means keeping you safe. In his mind you forced him to take these measures to keep you safe.

“You know why I have to keep you locked up like this don’t you baby? I can’t risk you doing something like that again, what would I do without you?”

Mark is shocked. He never expected it, he doesn’t necessarily make your mental health a priority for him. He knows you probably hate him and that you’d do nearly anything to get away from him. He just never thought unaliving yourself would be on the table for you. In fact, he probably expected you to try and kill him before you ever tried to hurt yourself. He will feel shameful and for the first time a little guilty about taking you. I don’t see him ever letting you go but he might be willing to talk and see what changes can be made to make you more ‘comfortable’ in your new life.

“Don’t punish yourself for the decision I made. If you wanted to kill someone it should’ve been me. Not you, never you.”

Haechan’s response might come off as cold and heartless. That’s only half true. Initially he might try and make himself believe that it wasn’t you who did it to yourself but that an intruder broke in and attacked you. When he realizes what you tried to do he knows that nothing he will say will comfort you or inspire you to never do it again. You hate him, so much that you’d rather die than be stuck with him another second. What could he possibly say to change your mind? His approach is a little brazen and risky but he wants to test your will to live. How badly did you truly want to be free of him? He used the only thing he knows for sure works in keeping you in check. Fear. Your fear of him and what he might do.

“What? It’s okay for you to go around taking lives but I can’t?” He asks with a quizzical expression as he holds a knife to your former friend’s throat, his icy eyes piercing into yours.