#both physically and mentally
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@ sxibunny
#i felt really good today#both physically and mentally#me#my pics#cute girl#bunny girl#bd/sm kink#bd/sm blog#bd/sm brat#bd/sm community#bd/sm daddy#babygirl
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man we all know charlie had an emo phase but I really wanna explore the possibility she wasn't always the charlie we see now. she wasn't always gentle or kind or optimistic and all of those things are hard-won after battling the opposite. that maybe at some point, bitterness and anger and spite started eating her alive and she changed for herself first. that her kindness is selfish at its root, that her altruism is self-serving above all else, because if she kept on the same path, there might be nothing else left of her. and at some point it stopped being about her and started to be about others.
and as a bonus? this version of charlie would pair perfectly with a version of vaggie who wasn't always guilt-ridden, who truly believed in her cause. who was lethal and ruthless and loved what she did because she believed and ultimately it was what did her in. who had truly never hesitated before that child, because extermination wasn't just a necessity, it was a game. entertainment.
idk I just. I love their dynamic already so much but the contrast of charlie becoming optimistic for herself vs vaggie developing guilt and shame over others, and both of them finding the harmony between those extremes?
#idk i think about them a lot#its like almost a dark!charlie au but not exactly yknow#vaggie being happy and carefree and steadfast in her beliefs before her fall#the angst potential is ugh#chef kiss#anyway#chaggie#charlie morningstar#vaggie hazbin hotel#vaggie#hazbin hotel#rainbowmoth#to some extent i do think charlies optimism is a front#not like shes disingenuos#but where alastor smiles so nobody knows whats going on under the surface (manipulative)#charlie smiles so nobody knows whats going on under the surface (defensive)#if she smiles through the pain did it really happen?#if she laughs at jokes at her own expense do they still hurt?#ow i hurt myself with this one#and then imagine vaggie never experiencing shame or guilt or regret before she fell#imagine how much worse those would feel the first time experiencing them#her entire world drops out from under her and it leaves scars#both physically AND mentally#but her scars make her softer#gentler#but also sadder and yes more defensive#just not the same way charlie is#the two of them seeing gentleness borne of violence in each other#UGH i have to write it dont i
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a couple of dudes i've doodled lately with even more new brushes
#rottmnt#rottmnt leonardo#rottmnt michelangelo#lee's art#i'm super sick rn#to those reading tags: hi i overworked myself and my body is telling me that i need to take a break#both physically and mentally#yeaaahhhhh the things that does to a lil' lee#thanks to the friends who've kept me company during bad nights#and thank you all for the support#i'm gonna go draw some more before i crash to my bed for the day
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Late night illusion Tsumugi~
#I still haven't recovered from this#both physically and mentally#OGUHGOUHGH I NEED HER I NEED HERRRRRRRRRRRRRRR#my happiness depends on how strong that little piece of metal that is holding both her shirt and choker (?) is#would you drink the water from that pond#YES OR NO ANSWER QUICKLY#tsumugi aoba#femstars#genderbend#ensemble stars#art#my art
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catradora as rival ballerinas/ballet as psychological horror au
Both catra and Adora were indoctrinated into the ballet world from a young age, both from family pressure. Adora because her family are long standing patrons of this ballet company/academy and how she’s pressured to continue the legacy of becoming the prima ballerina just like her mother and her grandmother before her. And catra because her mother (who was a self made successful dancer, and had her accidentally) only paid attention to/appreciated her when she was dancing and so catra danced more to gain her approval and love.
So this way they both have their self value intertwined with their dancing capabilities and with a lot of pressure to succeed. Anyway, due to Eurocentric standards and adora’s family nepotism, everyone expected Adora to be the principal dancer after the graduation. So imagine the shock and resentment out of everyone (adora’s family, the institute’s elitist patrons, even public opinion) when mara, the fair and just artistic director, chooses catra over her.
I don’t think anyone would be happy, I mean canon-wise, before the rude wakening of thaymor, catra was happy sitting in adora’s shadow, as long as Adora was there. And poor Adora, the toll this would take on her self esteem would be catastrophic. Not to mention how this would affect their relationship, adora adores catra, but she was still groomed into this position as her only purpose in life so there’s really only one way to react to the person who ‘stole’ that purpose from her. She still tries to mask her resentment and jealousy, because she’s still Adora. Catra didn’t mind the entirety of institution crucifying her for stealing the role of their beloved golden girl, it was losing adora that really hurt her, so she tries to find solace in her mother acknowledging her success. She doesn’t. Due to weaver’s mentality of pressure makes diamond, she doesn’t think catra did enough to be given this role. In her words, nothing came easy to her so why should it be different to catra.
So yeah, I feel like a lot topics can be explored here mainly the dark side of ballet, but also parental issues, elitism, racism, gender roles and dysfunctional relationships, it’s a lot
#The inherent horror of femininity#Ballet genuinely sounds like medieval torture sometimes#Both physically and mentally#Putting this girls situations#Ballerina catradora au#Catra#adora#catradora#she ra and the princesses of power#she-ra#spop#my writing
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Gotta love that 2.30am urge to clean my room and change my sheets... only now I lost the motivation, so I have no sheets on my bed and half of my closet is on the floor.
At least I've gotten rid of the rubbish, and sorted dirty clothes from the clean ones... Time to throw my doona on the mattress and call it good enough.
Thanks AuDHD.
#adhd#autism#audhd#the motivation hit#then it left#now I'm exhausted#both physically and mentally#my room just looks a different type of mess now#:(
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Star, stop changing Tamami's design challenge (impossible).
No, for real, I think this is the fifth redesign I've done of her character. I don't know why but the past designs I've made for her just weren't satisfying to me for some reason. Some of the designs I decided were just bad or didn't suit her while the others were similar but I just didn't like how it looked (tank top, large sweater, scarf, the rainbow bracelet and a long skirt). But I...think I've finally landed on a design that I liked the most out of all the ones I've made so far. (Please let it be the last. Please, my brain and heart. I would like to settle on a design and move on!)
ANYWAYS, I used Teruya's DRA sprite as a base for Tamami since, well, she is his mom and she's about as short as DRA!Teruya (or maybe shorter, I don't know, the wiki gave me two heights for his DRA self. I decided she's about 4'8'' to 5''). So it made sense to use this sprite for her, even when I made slight adjustments to her eyes and nose by making the eyes a little wider and bigger and the nose a bit more pronounced as DRA!Teruya's nose is very small. Out of three of the five designs I've made, I kept this short hairstyle of hers with a large ahoge as I loved this style the most and didn't want to change it. I based her bangs off of SDRA2!Teruya's length and style and the back of her hair like DRA!Teruya's, but I changed the way the strands looked so that it'd look more like her own hairstyle but you can still see the resemblance between the two of them. The ahoge, though, is very much real, unlike Kojiro's and Teruya's (they canonically style their hair like that on purpose), and she cannot fix it no matter how hard she tries. So she just gave up and let it be. Tamami got stuck with the protagonist trait, even though she died before the events of Danganronpa, lol. I've never been a fan of fictional kids looking like carbon copies of their parents. Like, you have the meta-power to design these kids anyway you like and you just make them look exactly like one of their parents? Unless their look-alike appearance is plot relevant, it's just weird for them to look so much like one parent that they can easily be mistaken as siblings and has zero resemblance to the other. And that's saying a lot coming from me who looks a lot more like my Irish dad from skin tone alone, but even then people can tell that I'm at least Asian because of my facial structure and even asked as such, tying my appearance to my Filipino mom. I don't know, I just like seeing a mix of traits for the kids to have inherited from their parents, you know? So, since Kojiro already has a design with green hair and green eyes, I decided to have Tamami have a different hair color, gray and green, but she also has green eyes, just a different shade. Teruya inherited his mother's eyes while getting his father's hair. Since I headcanon Teruya to have freckles, Tamami has freckles as well and as I mentioned before in this post, I adjusted her skin tone to be more obviously tanned instead of dusty from my older drawings of her. And then there's the outfit, which is a dark gray tank top, a long denim(?) skirt, dark reddish-brown boots, a blue handkerchief scarf to match with Kojiro, and a big fluffy yellow sweater with a checkerboard pattern that is tucked into her skirt, and long puffy sleeves that hangs off of her shoulders. The rainbow stripes on her skirt and the rainbow bracelet ties her design to Teruya's as he wears a rainbow as well, and I thought it'd be a neat idea for them to have a similar love for rainbows even though they've never met (cause she died via childbirth). The thought of Teruya still inheriting some of his mom's mannerisms and traits even though they never officially met scratches my brain in a good, angsty way. I wonder what Kojiro thinks whenever he recognizes parts of Tamami in Teruya...And that's it for Tamami's design! Hopefully it'll stay this way.
Tiny characters that can beat the shit out of an enemy that's much taller than them will always be peak character design, you can't change my mind on that.
#DRA#Danganronpa Another#Tamami Otori#SDRA2#Super Danganronpa Another 2#sprite edit#Star's Art#OCs#Original Character#DRA Spoilers#SDRA2 Spoilers#<- just in case#fun fact: she's actually quite muscular underneath her clothing#it's just that this outfit hides most of her skin#and also I'm not that good at drawing muscles ^^;#Her other outfits showed a bit more skin which showed off those muscles I tried to draw#but again there was something about them that I just didn't like while drawing them#and I don't know why#so in the end this design won out#which sadly hid her muscles :pensive emoji:#I guess I just like how soft she looks in this version of her outfit instead?#which would contrast greatly with her actual strength#both physically and mentally#and by mentally I mean that if she had actually lived long enough to experience the Tragedy#she would not fall to Despair and would keep trudging on regardless of what's thrown her way#unlike her husband who is far more vulnerable and emotionally unstable than he lets on underneath#although if she was alive she wouldn't have allowed Kojiro to become a Despair in the first place#even if she had to drag him kicking and screaming - she'd go and verify Teruya's status herself as she wouldn't just give up hope like that#and if the news were true she wouldn't blame or take it out on the world that took away her only son like Kojiro did in canon#no she'd take it out on the Despairs as *they* were the perpetrators
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All vessels are children. Stop drawing Hollow porn. There is no proof that vessels age mentally at all. They can get taller yes, but all vessels are children still. They all died young.
Anon if this is about me being uncomfortable with porn of Ghost on the account that they're physically still a child, I'm pretty fucking sure that I already stated that I'm not gonna do anything about it other than state that I don't want that gross shit on my blog. I'm not a fucking cop. And I most CERTAINLY already stated that nonsexual content of Ghost being an adult in a child's body doesn't bother me at all, its exclusively the porn that gets to me.
Anyways for me what matters is physical maturity because sex is harmful to young bodies so idc if you hc Ghost as mentally an adult, they still need to be physically an adult as well. Because yeah there very much is a maturity/development shift shown in canon, the vessels canonically hatched from eggs in the abyss and Ghost is still canonically the same size and has the same proportions as all the newborn vessels that died in the Abyss. Hollow is markedly physically different, has text saying that they were 'raised to prime form' and shares characteristics with other adult characters including their parents, so they're sexually mature and and fully an adult, plus their cut dreamnail dialogue, the grace of their actions, and their resilance against the Radiance makes them pretty fucking clearly mentally an adult as well. Don't infantilize them because that bothers me way fucking worse than the concept of Ghost being an adult in a child body ever will
Age regression is a whole other can of worms that I'm not educated enough to make an argument on but I'm pretty fucking grossed out by the 'oh they may be a child but they're mentally an adult so its okay uwu' argument bc that's an actual pedo argument that's made irl. The reverse, on the other hand, is not true, and infantilizing grownass adults is both an abuse tactic used to take agency away from victims and an excuse to wave the blame away from privilaged adults who got themselves into hot shit. Idk if they're fictional characters, the mirror of both of those things are close enough to irl issues that it makes me want to vomit and I am within full right to say that I don't want to see or interact with either of them. If you don't like it, get the fuck off my blog
#anyways I'm going to continue sexualizing hollow and writing ghost as their kid sibling bc the wastelands stunted their growth#both physically and mentally#i'm not a fucking cop but don't come into my house and tell me what to do#anon#reply
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on hiatus
there's 60 posts in the queue but i'm not gonna be here for a week or two or three idk yet
still gonna post on my sideblogs, if you're tvdu fan you can check them out:
@klarolinecentral @theoriginalsarchive
#feeling stressed and burned out and i'm working all the time and trying to heal my soul with russian stand up/entertainment shows#yeah working all the time isn't healthy but i fuck up all my deadlines while procrastinating and not in a really good place tbh#both physically and mentally#plus i'm not really watching any asian content sooooo yes hiatus seems like a good idea#also maybe i'll gif some scenes from tuc2 tomorrow and then go on hiatus stay tuned#jey talks
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Alright, fine, I'll bite - a bitch who knows quite literally Nothing abt the franchise, if one were to try checking out Dragon Age, where should they start? Would it be incredibly stupid to just start right off the bat with the new one? Also - consider that the bitch is Fucking Terrible at Video Games - how hard are they to play?
#i cannot stress enough how bad at games i am#my hand-eye coordination and quick fine motor skills are DOGSHIT and my reaction to needing to make a quick decision is to freeze#both physically and mentally#the literal only reasons i'm actually kind of pretty good at bg3 are both extensive practice and the turn-based combat#buuuut anyways after being addicted to bg3 for so long...#if you dangle a fantasy rpg with romance options in front of my face...i'm gonna be at least a little interested#personal grumblings
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i should write literally anything about the only signalis oc i can actually think of, they* have been stuck in my head for so long now, i have like, half of a note on them right now
*there's multiple people in there
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bro i am so tired
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My hands are doing a bit better actually but i'm starting to feel like i've got a fever or something, idk why. And after my classes i've got to take a train to Milan 💀
#without my girlfriend#i literally don't want to be childish in a pathetic kinda way but like#i want to be with her rn because i'm feeling horrible#both physically and mentally#what happened tonight really took a toll on me
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if i could stop falling apart now pls? thanks
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"Why does everything feel off," I say as if I didn't experience a traumatic event recently
#its like everything got moved two inches to the left#both physically and mentally#like its all the same but. different.#i need to shower#cant remember the last time I did#feel like I cant remember when I did anything before it happened#im ok btw#nothing happened to me directly#as in I was not physically harmed in any way#thank god my teacher gave me an extension on my first assignemnt without me even having to ask#morri mumbles
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Istg one of these days I’m gonna become a cannibal just to get something different in my system
#I can’t eat or else I feel sick#it’s the same thing every day#I just want to DO Something#any you know it’s bad when someone chronically online and shut in like me actually wants to go outside#into the world#and do something#anything#but it hurts to eat#it hurts to move#i hate thinking#I hate eating#I hate laughing#I hate crying#it all hurts so bad#both physically and mentally#sometimes I just want to curl up and rot#I’m so sick and tired#and it’s not like anyone can help me#so I just have to wallow in my shame#my body has been betraying me since I was born with a female one#constantly going through hell is not fun
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