#pikmin smash or pass

[pkmn-smashorpass]

[charactersmashorpass-2]

"(this is a *sentient* ai btw) hey girl, you can evaluate MY treasures any time 😏"

[lonelypep]

every smash bros character ranked by how good of a cook i think they’d be.

82: piranha plant

eating this dish will kill you instantly. turns out he spit some poison in there while no one was looking. and yeah, that sucks, but if you even accepted a meal from this guy i think you have bigger problems

81: ridley.

let’s be real, if you let this guy into the kitchen, you made a huge mistake. it’s like john mulaney’s horse in a hospital sketch: you never know what he’s gonna do next. you’re too focused on getting him out.

80: king k rool.

king k rool is many things. a king, a pirate, a scientist. but he is not a cook. he’ll try, but he has literally no clue what he’s even doing in the kitchen.

79: yoshi

yoshi will give you a dish and you’ll be like “what the fuck is this” and he’ll talk about how it was made from the finest newborns of his home planet. i’m deciding to ignore it but it’s really nagging at me.

78: sonic

sonic shouldn’t be on this list. because he wouldn’t make you any food. he’ll go to the local sonic and get a burger in about 3 minutes. it sucks. disqualified.

77: pac man

what can i say. it tastes like literal plastic. i don’t even wanna know how he made it. i’ll give it back to him but the nice thing about pac man is he wouldn’t give a shit.

76: bowser jr.

fuck this guy. he rage quit at making a grilled cheese. now there’s a literal canonball in the stove. now no one else can use it!! this is what happens when you spoil kids.

75: pikachu/pichu

these two are in the same category since they’d make the same thing. they’d get store bought french fries and fry them with lighting outside. it’s consistent, it works, just not really filling. and they don’t know how to make anything else.

74. wario

don’t get me wrong: he knows what he’s doing. he’s the burger king of smash. he’s this low because the burger is the most unhealthy shit you’ll ever have. eating it gave you chronic diarrhea, gastrointestinal issues, and permanently damaged your taste buds. but god fucking damn was it a good burger.

73. hero

he gave you a single piece of bread with butter on it. it’s not bad but…really dude?

72: olimar

he didn’t make you a bad meal, in fact it was one of the best here. but that’s because he didn’t make you something. it was the pikmin and he’s trying to pass it off as his own and the pikmin don’t know because they don’t speak english. 0/10: not fucking cool dude.

71: kazuya

honestly? i don’t trust this guy. i was too intimidated to even ask his name. from what i can gather no one even invited him to the party he just showed up and made a mediocre meal. what’s weird: someone came into the kitchen and claimed this guy killed their whole family. we never saw that guy again. needless to say, kazuya wasn’t invited to the afterparty.

70: link (botw)

don’t get me wrong here, link is a five star chef. he’s just really unsanitary. apparently he cut the meat and vegetables with the same sword he killed calamity ganon with. i don’t wanna taste that guy!! have you seen him?? not to mention he pulled the meal out of his pants. i don’t even know how it fit in there.

69: inkling

she made a pancake and i thought it was good! but i absolutely can’t condone this. inkling left so much fucking weird slime and shit all over my house. and got really competitive when she heard i was getting meals from everyone else. i hope they’re all ok.

68: ROB

it was so processed. the most processed food i’ve ever had in my entire life. it’s not his fault, rob is a great guy. but this tasted like literally nothing.

67: ice climbers

when they told me they were making dessert, i trusted them. but i let someone else taste test first. my best friend was sent to the hospital because of tongue frostbite. didn’t even know that was a thing. i made the ice climbers pay for it (they’re fucking loaded)

66: villager

he made isabelle do it. and she made something great! but i’m not giving this cretin credit for having the money to afford a five star chef. you don’t deserve it because you sold a shit ton of tarantulas villager!!

65: lucario.

dude got really mad and destroyed my kitchen. he’s REALLY lucky he got the burger PERFECTLY cooked.

64: male byleth.

like this dude knows how to cook. he can barely make chicken nuggets. he has to eat in the school cafeteria simply because he never learned how to cook a simple meal. but he’s a really nice guy. total himbo. love him.

63: ryu

i asked this guy what he likes to eat. big mistake. he then went on to say that his training regiment doesn’t condone copious indulgence (his words) and he lives off of nothing but protein shakes. you do you i guess.

62-61: fox/falco

these two went into the kitchen and came out with weird alien food. i didn’t eat it but everyone else seemed to enjoy it

60: greninja

when he first came out i was so excited. he came out with the most finely sliced food i had ever seen in my entire life. but it was soooo watered down. everything tasted like celery. how do you make crab taste like celery?? how??!

59-58: simon/richter

these guys both made the same exact fish recipe, came out at the same time, and proceeded to fight each other. i didn’t get to try any 😭

57-49: every fire emblem character.

genuinely, i can’t tell these guys apart. or their food choices. honestly, my bad. i’m sure they’re good. but where do i even start.

48: sheik

she doesn’t know how to cook. she kidnapped someone else. normally i wouldn’t put someone like that this high but a. i have gender envy b. it’s for the greater good (or so she said)

47: cloud

dude made a great sandwich but he kept screaming random noises while he did. personally, i’m just glad he managed not to destroy the kitchen. that’s a first here.

46: captain falcon

he promised he’d pick up some pizza but got into a car crash on the way there. eventually he got there after the car crash was all sorted out, but got into ANOTHER on the way back. i’m honestly kind of impressed

45: steve

steve could cook an absolutely fucking KILLER meal. he’ll even offer to do it for free. but you shouldn’t let him under any circumstances. he took 13 hours gathering materials and while the wait was, arguably, worth it, i never want to experience it again. (side note: we asked captain falcon to get some pizza while waiting which led to the aforementioned entry)

44: sora

sora doesn’t know how to cook but he’s by far the biggest name at this party. everyone fucking loves him. he’s friends with GOOFY. this dude hangs out with GOOFY. this guys has hung out with GOOFY AND jack sparrow. bad food but i could listen to this guy talk for hours about his story. i’m sure i’ll understand it all.

43-40: pokémon trainer

this guys organization is fucking atrocious. if he can actually get his shit together he’ll cook up some nice vegetarian meals, but that’s a big if.

HONORABLE MENTION: sans mii gunner

sans undertale is a world renowned, famous chef. his recipes are simple, but cooked with such love, care, and finess it turns a simple cheeseburger into a masterpiece. sans undertale would easily top this list. sans mii gunner is not sans undertale. he bought the real sans’ cookbook and thinks he’s some kind of cooking genius. and sure he’s got the recipes but none of the skill to actually make it.

39-38: samus/zero suit samus

hooray! we’re out of bad cook options now. samus is a great cook, but she’s so used to her alien delicacies she doesn’t know how to cook on earth anymore. shame, but i trust her to produce something edible.

37: shulk

he is really good at the grill. unfortunately, he refused to put a shirt on and made everyone a little uncomfy. that being said, he showed me the beach boys and i had never listened to them before. so he gets points.

36-35: pit/dark pit

these guys don’t know how to cook but the flew into the sky and killed some mythical bird for everyone to eat. i couldn’t have any, i’m pescatarian, but everyone else loved it.

34: bayonnetta

she opened a portal to a waffle house and a bunch of demons came flying out. she didn’t make anything, but honestly, absolutely legendary experience that was.

33: duck hunt

you’d think a dog wouldn’t bring anything meaningful. this would be false. that is the freshest duck i’ve ever seen in my entire life. (didn’t eat it: pescatarian)

32: king dedede

he made his legendary homemade mashed potatoes. everyone loved them. so creamy… weirdly perfect. too bad i hate the monarchy. sorry bud.

31: meta knight

meta knight is a great cook and should be higher. but i don’t want him to be. because he’s so fucking pretentious. he sliced all the food in front of everyone and wouldn’t shut up about radiohead. hate this guy.

30-29: daisy/peach

these two put all their private chefs together to make something for everyone. great catering, great food, but they didn’t technically make it. love them.

28: mewtwo

as if mewtwo wouldn’t just read someone’s mind and cook something. but it’s not mewtwo’s food…so…. sorry dude you cheated.

27: dark samus

she really surprised me here. she cooked up the most exquisite alien delicacies i’ve ever tasted in my entire life. should be higher. but unfortunately, i had to get a space parasite removed from my system by regular samus. honestly though… it was worth it.

26: ganon

he was rude to everyone about his cooking skills and wouldn’t stop bragging. asshole am i right? but surprised everyone by grilling his god damn heart out. he’s a bad try hard but like go off i guess.

25: isabelle

she’s trying her absolute fucking best and she deserves the world here. amazing cook, we need to save her from the island.

24: little mac

dude went so hard. brought new york pizza ALL THE WAY FROM NEW YORK. ok, not literally, but he made a damn good pizza

23: snake

full disclosure: snake doesn’t know how to cook. also no one knows he’s an agent. but he has to cook to blend in so you BEST BELIEVE this man is going to COOK like his life depends on it.

22-20: young link, ness, and lucas

all these guys are incredibly mature for their age. surprised everyone at this party. i had deep and philosophical conversations with all of them about appreciating life. i fucking cried. oh and they made everyone sandwiches, and even took my pescatarianism into account.

19: rosalina

she brought weird space ice cream and i felt my mind expanding as i ate it. love her.

18: mr game and watch

he feels like everyone’s dad! and he’s one of those cooks who cooks in front of everyone. dude flung his meals onto everyone’s plates expertly. love him.

17: joker

originally much lower on this list, joker showed up at my house and attempted to make a grilled cheese and made the worst thing i’ve ever taste. then he said something about gru from despicable me and stood in the corner for an hour. originally i had him towards the bottom but then he doordashed five gigantic burgers, ate all of them in one sitting, and then made me an expensive curry that tasted fantastic. dude went hard.

it was at this point i realized i made a mistake with the numbers. like hell if i’m going to fix the whole thing.

22: zelda

she made some weird food but damn was it pretty to look at! crystals, magic power, i mean good vibes all around here.

21-20: pyra and mythra

i feel like i should put them here since they’re confirmed to be good cooks in the game. but between you and me, i didn’t invite them. i’d consider some entries before this to be better cooks but at this point i’ve been working on this list for 8 hours i do not wanna go back and fix things please i mean this whole list is a joke no one should take this seriously

19: banjo and kazooie

these guys can fucking cook. they’ve been living on their own for a while so it makes sense but it still surprises me. they made a really big stew and even brought free puzzle games.

18: wolf

GRILL MASTER. dude knows what he’s doing on that thing. i’ve never seen better spatula work. holy shit.

17: kirby

kirby came in with some weird blonde hair and made some FANTASTIC ribs (that i didn’t have bc i’m pescatarian). weirdly, gordon ramsey went missing the same day…. i’m sure it means nothing.

16: mario

dude made some absolutely spectacular spaghetti. but he kept talking about how great he is and it really off put some people. kinda weird dude.

15: dr mario. dude brought 50 apples to the potluck. guess he doesn’t wanna see anyone in the office. and he didn’t because we ate them all. take that.

14: min min

she brought some soup dumplings which a lot of people hadn’t had! love her. literally fantastic. she had a whole arm for cooking. that’s what we call efficient.

13: ken

he’s kenough. he is amazing at barbecue. he can cook things with his hands, juggle, also he’s just a fun presence. (i made him make fake meat burgers for me)

12: jigglypuff

she showed up with so many pastries. like so many. not only that, but they were decorative!! she put so much work into that. love her.

11: luigi

he tried to make spaghetti like his brother but a literal fucking meteor slammed into his pot and cracked it. tough luck. then he offered to pay and i refused, but went out and got me some really expensive spaghetti anyways! he’s such a nice guy!! shouldn’t be this high… but i love this guy so much. he’s trying his hardest and i respect that.

10: toon link

toon link didn’t actually make anything. but his mom came and made everyone a salad. and honestly! his mom is some great company. she had so many interesting stories about his childhood. honestly she added so much to the function

9: terry

he is the BARBECUE MASTER!!!! literally what the hell how is he so good! everyone at the party kinda stereotyped him but he’s really really progressive with his views which you wouldn’t think for a big barbecue muscle guy in a baseball cap but everyone loved this guy.

8: mega man

the MASTER CHEF!! literally. he was on master chef. he uses thin round blades to slice vegetables, heats things perfectly, has an instance knowledge of spices, just damn. this guy knows what he’s doing.

7-6: bowser and donkey kong

common misconception: everyone thinks these two would have no idea how to cook. but these are FAMILY GUYS HERE!! they’re providing for absolutely gigantic families, these fuckers know how to make a sandwich and they did. initially they started off making separate sandwiches but they have a really similar recipe and decided to work together. and i really respect that. also turns out peach is just bowser’s kids’ babysitter.

5: palutena.

everyone expected her to show up with some absolutely mystical food. naturally, she showed up with the literal ambrosia of the gods. holy shit. unfortunately, she didn’t put as much effort into it as she could’ve.

4: sephiroth.

ok this guy didn’t really cook anything amazing. but his sheer fucking commitment to the vibe is literally legendary. this man has a long as sword he cut 10 veggies at a time with. he heat them with magic world ending fire. when he was done in the kitchen he surrounded himself with fire and gazed menacingly at me. his sheer commitment to the edge lord aesthetic is truly exemplary.

3: incineroar.

THE GRILLING GOAT!! this man is a grill master. he was prepared to grill ANYTHING. and i mean anything. fish, veggies, meat, fucking grilled cheese. love this guy.

2: wii fit trainer

she made the most well balanced and healthy salad i’ve ever had. and she made it taste extraordinary. she can be a little intense about fitness but i’ve never had a healthier meal in my life. it immediately lowered my extremely high cholesterol.

1. diddy kong

he’s about ten. he made you a pb&j. he had homework to do, but he made you a pb&j. he didn’t have to. he wasn’t asked to. he just wanted to make you a pb&j. he could’ve done anything else but he made you a pb&j. what heartless monster wouldn’t accept it.

[neogandw]

Continuing onward, page 2 of 6, the rest of which you can see here.

Honestly this page was a lot of fun, I love recreating areas in gaming a lot, so this was a lot of fun with the whole playing around with multiple universes in smash to give the idea that the Inkling girl just can't hit a shot.

Of note:

I like to think that Inkling Girl's first mistake was skipping Sheldon's explanation. Like, I get it, but his bios do give you a hint of how the thing is supposed to work. Just because you're familiar with a thing it doesn't mean you should skip the manual.

I could have straight up taken a picture of Mementos, but I instead re-drew the whole bit (if anything I just reused a re-draw of the main mementos map which I have done in a previous drawing project). I honestly do not skip steps, if I can recreate a thing for the shot, I'll go out of my way to do it. It makes things look more seamless and in-line with the drawings as a whole if I do everything from scratch, though I'm not above re-using previous drawing assets if I can get away with it (since the mementos map never really changes, I can just reuse that isolated re-draw I have).

If you want it for whatever reason, here it is.

Oh, by the by, I kinda based Joker's render off his appearence in Tactica since that had been recently released by the time I was doing the drawing. I do like the tactica renders so I may base the persona characters off that to simplify them a bit style-wise.

I know WarioWare being used for Samus is a bit of an odd choice, but I figured I could just do a simpler area rather than going with either Norfair (all that lava would get in the way of the ORANGE paint), Brinstar (same, but Yellow) or Frigate Orpheon (I didn't really need the parasite queen in the background). Adding Pikachu in was a later idea just to highlight how much she's missing the shot.

Dedede and a Pikmin laying down was funny enough already, but here's a bit of hilarity I thought about (and I know that explaining the joke ruins it, but you know, this is supposed to be a commentary): this is flat zone, it's entirely 2D, the inkling girl somehow missed the shot even when you only needed to aim left or right.

I like Minecraft a lot, but when DRAWING the universe its a bit dull if everything is just cubes. So while I totally can do that I just choose to make a stylized version that is semi-cubey for most everything. Though Alex I prefer to go full proportions.

Alex being more human proportioned does bring some challenges since I do want her to look like a country bumpkin of sorts, so this comic helped me finalize how I would do it. Honestly its kind of based on how artist Peargor does it. Though I'm gonna go with a longer braid and some freckles.

I do largely prefer Alex over Steve though, so you'll likely see her whenever I involve minecraft on my drawings. If I were to draw steve though? I'd likely make him buff. I tend to think of Alex as the builder/farmer (which is my playstyle) whereas Steve is the adventurer (how my friends play the game).

I didn't actually borrow any textures from Minecraft, they were self made. Which is kind of why they're kind of shit.

Honestly drawing the regular Charger was a bit of a thing. The Splatoon weaponry can be very complex in its detailing so for the first few panels it was kind of traced. Over time I just did it on my own for later panels.

Tracing isn't a bad practice, just as long as you don't pass an entirely traced work as your own. Trace responsibly kids, it helps learn how to do a thing.

[retrogamerj]

Modern Gaming: Resident Evil 3: Nemesis (GameCube) Review

A new edition of Modern Gaming Reviews is up and continuing through the Halloween season we check out another Resident Evil port. This is the strange port of Resident Evil 3 for the GameCube— along with RE2 and Code Veronica X that were also brought over — was a familiar thing Capcom did often to bring past games so to have the series on the then current platform. They did the same for the Sega Dreamcast when RE2 and RE3 were ported in 2000 due to the first release of Code Veronica. Nintendo was smart to get an exclusive contract from Capcom to have the latest games from the series at the start of the Sixth Gen. During the early days of the Sixth Gen Nintendo’s lineup was often looked down on due to their marketing style going against the craze for mature content. Even though these thoughts from insecure gamers were downright annoying, the marketing coupled with the lunchbox designed console didn’t help. We all know the GameCube’s early days were amazing thanks to a great launch followed by a fun first year of hit releases. Here is the list that includes Luigi Mansion, Smash Bros Melee, Star Wars: Rogue Squadron II, REmake, Pikmin, Animal Crossing, Metroid Prime, and Mario Sunshine. That is more than enough for any gamer to gush over knowing the amount of fun that was going to ensure from that lineup. ​ Now, the port of RE3 was strange for many reasons when by the time the GameCube edition came to the system the game didn’t have the same luster from 1999. Bringing this over to Sega’s Dreamcast made sense in 2000 due to being a year old from releasing on PS1. However, when we learned the game came to the GameCube, five years have nearly passed already. It’s obvious Capcom’s corporate board was being greedy, even charging almost fifty dollars for an older game. No wonder none of these came over to the Xbox or PC because then resources would’ve been wasted. Another thing is it wouldn’t have made sense anyway if Capcom was focusing on new exclusives and multiplatform releases. They were trying to have the series available on both the Dreamcast and GameCube due to the then “newer” games being on these consoles. Except for GameCube, REmake, RE0 and RE4 would’ve been enough for that entire gen without replaying the older titles.    

Resident Evil 3: Nemesis (GameCube) Review

[dolphs-world]

Polar Pass ~ Finally, the Ideal Roster

Excluding what I have already discussed, there are 16 characters I would change. Starting with 3rd party characters and the Ultimate DLC: Crash/Cortex for (and Coco/Nina because I got rid of Chrom because I got rid of Roy) Pyra/Mythra and Rayman for Min Min. I have already gone over these characters but I'll add some more points. We already had Shulk representing Xenoblade, we did not need more. No one cares about Arms and replacing Min Min with Rayman makes a lot of sense due to reach of their limbs. Throughout this list a lot of replacements are going to be with some similar (and also a lot won't be). For other 3rd party reps I have taken out all of the Mii fighters. The Mii fighters are lame and the Wii series of games was already represented by Wii Fit Trainer, who is a character I don't like to play as but is a very unique addition to the roster. Instead I put in Professor Layton and Bomberman, because I love Professor Layton and I love my friend who suggested Bomberman, and Raiden. Not from Mortal Kombat, although another good choice, but from MGS. MGS kicks ass and I think a tactical super soldier guerilla warfare guy works against a robotic ninja. There needs to be more unique weapon based characters in Smash like spearmen, bombers, and cybernetic ninjas. Raiden is the second most unique character and star of his own game and that's why he's in. For Pokemon: Gardevoir for Jigglypuff, Smeargle for Pichu, and Oshawott for Roy (haha). You can keep Mewtwo, I understand how important they and that first Gen of Pokemon are. Keeping along with replacing Melee characters, Eggplant Man for Dr. Mario and Krystal for Falco. Capitalising on the Mario Movie and the fact that Wrecking Crew already has a stage in smash, and is much better than all the other one off games on NES, is why Eggplant Man is in. Krystal has an ice spear and Falco is mean. Fox, Krystal, and especially Wolf are also way more sexy than Falco. Last two 3rd party reps: Tetris for Isabelle and Eggman for Bowser Jr. . I'm sorry, Isabelle is still lame and Tetris is the best selling game. I do not have to defend myself here. Eggman? Why him above the rest? Simple, everyone else is too much like Sonic. Same thing with MGS, why put in The Boss or Liquid Snake when Raiden is really unique? Tails, Knuckles, Shadow? Too much like Sonic. Eggman is the most distinct and a good replacement for Bowser Jr. who relys on tech. Also, despite making up a lot of villains in platformers, there's not a single mad scientist in Smash (except for Cortex now but shhh). It's Eggman! Now, I'm sorry Mario/Yoshi/Wario, I'm sorry Metroid, I'm sorry Pikmin. No new reps for you. Paper Mario, Shy Guy, Ashley, Chozo, Bulborb. All great choices, the honourable mentions, but I don't think anyone else deserves more reps as bad as Zelda. Darunia for Young Link, Midna for Toon Link, Hestu for Robin, and Tingle for Corrin. Hey, did you know, FE has only sold twice as much as Pikmin? Did you know FE's best selling game has sold a comparable amount to the best selling Pikmin game? I understand, numbers isn't causal to influence and Metroid has similar sales to FE. But 6 is too many. Zelda deserves them WAY more. But why these characters? They are a good representation of species or beloved or really weird. Gorons and Koroks are really cool and show how much more there is to Zelda than elves and a Captain Falcon Clone. Midna is the best companion in any Zelda game. And Tingle is Tingle! There you have it, a roster that gives Zelda and Pokemon its do credits, has very a reasonable amount of 3rd party reps, gives a little more to MGS and Sonic, and shows off a more interesting side of Nintendo's history. The Ultimate Showdown.

[propertyofkylar]

Masterlist of arcs

Pikmin-end

Abomination(cars) - never going away send help

YOU FORGOR

-moss fucking

-nica dead

-smash or pass

those r just from this week…

[obsidian-warthog]

Smash Bros Stage Concept: Serene Shores (Pikmin 4)

Everyone loves talking about hypothetical Smash characters, including me, but I also like the stages. They're very distinctive and help add more flavor to the crossover. So I'm going to outline one stage idea I got while playing Pikmin 4, Serene Shores.

I'm not an artist, and you know those people who have a passion for graphic design, that's not me. So I have very rough stage mark ups here just to show the basic layout. If something is black it's ground, a platform, or an obstacle. Blue is for water, and red is for hazards.

For actual in game visuals I'm not sure where exactly in Serene Shores the stage would be. Torn between having the sand castle or a nice view of the water in the background. But the stage itself has to be where there's water.

The first form of the stage has a main platform just over the water, with two smaller higher up ones on the sides. Not fond of how similar this layout is to the Pokemon Stadiums/Leagues/North Crater, but the water is a notable difference. And the 'main' platform is soft, so it can be dropped through.

Then the tide lowers and the water recedes, letting the fight go to the now dry ground. From this point on the stage is a walk-off. The previous main platform isn't too high from the ground.

Next, the sun sets and night comes. If they're in the background the S.S Beagle and Onion fly away, followed by a Lumiknoll popping up on the right part of the stage as a solid obstacle. Players can't damage it.

From this point on the stage will feature waves of enemies trying to destroy the Lumiknoll. They will attack any characters in their way, but leave you alone if you leave their path. If the Lumiknoll is destroyed the enemies will leave.

First is a wave of Desiccated Skitter Leafs crawling along the ground, a single hit can kill each. Next is a Flighty Joustmite who will attack the Lumiknoll from a spot right next to the top right platform.

Last is a Sovereign Bulbax, who is so big he passes through the main platform. Unlike in Pikmin 4 he can be damaged from the back. The Glow Pikmin will throw out a Glowmob to stun him at the center point of the stage, but if you're too close it will stun you too. This is an opening to take down the Sovereign Bulbax.

Graphic below with rough comparison of enemy sizes.

If all waves are cleared, the Lumiknoll spits out glowsap. This recovers 100 damage for whoever touches it first. It's a powerful reward, be sure you're the one to get it.

Eventually the sun will rise, and the tides soon after. This returns the stage to its initial form, where the cycle will begin anew.

[hoagmaster]

July 30, 2023

Today felt productive in several ways. The actual productive way: I did a good amount of fairly deep cleaning on some parts that needed it around here. Looks noticeably better and feels good to have done so. Now to do a bunch of other parts because that feeling would be good to replicate!

But don't fret, I had plenty of game time too. I picked up with the postgame in Pikmin 2, continued with The Legend of Zelda: Oracles of Seasons, then dabbled a bit with Smash Ultimate, Animal Crossing, and even played to the next checkpoint in Persona 5 Royal. I think I said I'd try juggling games in a previous report, so let's try that approach again!

Maybe the work schedule won't be as hectic this week without double editing for the side hustle, but I'd like to see how else I can get stuff done there too. Feel better about what I do and maybe make time pass faster so I can get back to cooler stuff.

We're nearly at the end of the month, so that's a good time for reflection and planning for the next one. That's also a nice feeling.

[magicmalcolm]

Okay let's actually watch this thing.

I've never played a single Pikmin game in my life, I haven't even played Olimar in Smash Bros. The series has kind of passed me by, and I still don't feel inclined to try it.

Haven't seen the recent Nintendo Direct in full yet but...

BATEN KAITOS!?!

[pkmn-smashorpass]

I keep reading your username as pikmin smash or pass

Someone should start a pikmin smash or pass

[princerevelucide]

good morning!!

[zaptap]

ive made a few of these bingo sheets and theyre fun so i decided to make one not just for e3 but also JUST for splatoon 3 (not just for e3 but for like the whole lifetime of the game). also heres my updated list of characters id like to see in smash, ordered generally by which id like more and/or think are the most realistic

since min min got in i took out helix, and since i couldnt decide whether to add in waluigi or madeline i added another row (realistically i dont think any indies are getting in but i threw some in anyway). also i was like “oh yeah maybe theyd put in a gen viii pokemon” so i threw in hatterene since thats one of my favorites.

also as for waluigi (and shovel knight for that matter) i think it would be nice to see an assist trophy get in just to break that rule. also i remember being super surprised he wasnt in brawl (back then i thought he and wario were equally important) and even though that was based on a wrong impression ive still felt like he should be in there ever since

notes about the bingos under the cut

really is about time for those n64 games, especially now that mario is dead so theyre free to release sm64 on it. game boy games would be nice sometime too

would also make sense to include banjo-kazooie in that, nintendos had a good relationship with microsoft lately and the total absence of anything banjo-kazooie on the switch is odd since it’s a dlc character (every other one has a game on switch they can use for cross-marketing, even if joker’s took a while) and i think the best explanation for that would be that theyre holding off for the nso n64 app (this is easiest from a technical standpoint because all they have to do is make a deal to use the roms)

when are they putting octolings in mk8d

xenoblade chronicles x is one of the only wii u games left that they could port (aside from ones that wouldnt make much sense like splatoon and ssb4) so i guess that might as well happen sometime. also monolith soft might be doing something else besides helping with splatoon 3

im not ready for metroid prime 4 (im over halfway through mp2 and therefore the trilogy as a whole) but it’s been a while, they might show it and it could even come out this year

hal apparently recently hinted at a new kirby game or something

the upgraded switch is obviously going to be called the Nintendo Switch ͥ  since they already did the ds lite so theyre clearly naming everything in the family after the ds family, theres absolutely no flaw in this logic. idk if theyre showing it, but unlike 2019 they didnt say they werent showing new hardware (just that they were showing software, which could be taken as denying rumors, but they sometimes specify when certain things arent being shown)

metroid prime trilogy also might come this year. would make sense to release it before mp4 since not everyone is going to buy a wii u to get it (and at this point that doesnt get nintendo any money since they stopped making them)

where is detective pikachu 2. i hope it has the blue pikachu from that first tease they gave us in like 2014 (2013? that was a loooong time ago idk)

they said this was MOSTLY 2021 so i am absolutely getting my hopes up for splatoon 2

the two sinnoh games could likely be there

would be super cool if oddity came to switch. and almost as ironic as megalovania getting into smash

we havent seen the botw sequel for a couple years so we’re kind of due for an update on that

it’s ace attorney’s 20th anniversary this year so maybe theyre doing something. theyre already porting those games though so idk. maybe he’s getting in smash

whats with that watermelon mario render

i held off on watching a playthrough for ndrv3 on the off chance it came to switch and i could play a dangan ronpa game for real for once but it’s now been 4 years and we just passed the 10th anniversary of the series (albeit during a pandemic when i wouldnt expect them to have done anything) so it would be cool to see the series come to switch. i think if it still doesnt after this though i’ll just watch the playthrough, 4 years is long enough. amazed ive avoided spoilers this long, i still know next to nothing about the game

im about done with acnh but im still waiting on those splatoon items. and i ran out of storage in february so i need more of that too

nintendo did stuff for zelda’s 30th anniversary so i doubt theyre forgetting the 35th. maybe wwhd/tphd ports, idk

been a couple years since fire emblem, intelligent systems is probably up to something besides planning yet another paper mario spinoff

miyamoto forgot pikmin 4 in the oven 6 years ago and it got burnt to a crisp and thats why it hasnt come out yet because he had to start over

and splatoon

the inklings scared daft punk into quitting so now that theres no competition in the robot musician scene they should have a daft punk style group

i waited and waited and neither of my top two splatoon stages (flounder and d’alfonsino) came back in splatoon 2 so i hope just because splatoon 3 isnt in inkopolis doesnt mean they still wont return

would be sick as hell if there was a real hide and seek mode instead of just sticking to your own rules in private battles. havent played that since 2015 but it was super fun

show us the effects of the chaos world

i wanted mc craig to have a song in octo expansion and they didnt deliver. heres another chance

splatnet 3 baby

cant wait for nogami to do a funny 3 pose

abxy came back for splatoon 2.... am i gonna be that lucky again...?

salmon run doesnt make sense if youre friends with a smallfry but they could either change the story context (you just fight “evil” salmonids?) or replace it with an equally fun co-op mode

amiibo!!! i think i said this before but they should label them by weapons if these cephalopods dont have genders, would make more sense (the gendered ones had different weapons anyway)

returning characters!!!! would like to see everyone have a role of some kind

maybe #GearForAll wasnt successful in getting the emperor/spy/mecha gear, but perhaps theyll at least consider not making that stuff exclusive this time around

squid girl gear should be back. and they should call it a dress instead of a tunic because its a dress. and theres no gender now anyway

as ive said before... TRIPLIES!! you hold one in each hand and another in your mouth. and you can spin around like the tasmanian devil

remove splatfest tee annoyances: you should have a prompt at the end of a splatfest to pay to scrub your tee (to make sure you get the chunks) also it should be on a neutral brand so you dont end up with an overabundance of ink resistance up (or whatever else)

better online and cloud saves would certainly justify having a second splatoon game on the same console, as much as im loving that it exists

hopefully theres a global testfire again

sooner or later the workers will rise up and kill mr grizz

remember in splatoon 1 where if you had squid beatz (via the amiibo) you could “play” it in the lobby and change the music? then you were stuck listening to only bubble bath in splatoon 2? why did they take that option away they should bring it back

looking at those apartment buildings in the trailer i think it would be cool if you had your own room and could decorate it

an octavio redemption arc would be fun to see. in the manga he stole the zapfish because the octarians had an energy crisis, and in the end they worked out a deal to share the electricity

[incorrectsmashbrosquotes]

hey just wanted to ask as i was curious about the Palutena Party, how did Palutena break the news to Gabriel about taking in Sothis and Rhea as he's now a dad to the green dragon gremlin and granddad to the lovely pope of Fodlan? I know Palutena was estatic about them, but hows the depressed Vampire Lord taking in the news of new family? Also what does Trevor, his son, think of the new family members? (I offer you a copy of Pikmin 3 Deluxe and Hades as payment)

The worst part was the silence.

Even as they wandered through through the canyon, stained red with the blood of the innocent. Even as they passed the still smoldering fires. The worst part was the hollow echoing silence.

Palutena’s light was dim, and the only thing illuminating the wreckage and ruins of the Zanado. But there was no joy or warmth in her light. Beside wer walked the blank faced Dracul. Dracula. Gabriel.

They stopped before the ruined palace. Still burning. Still blood soaked.

The place their daughter had been murdered.

“They cut her to pieces,” said Gabriel in a tight voice. “Into pieces. They forged a sword from her bones and heart,”

Palutena bowed her head. “Sothis... oh Sothis...” she said, tears running down her face.

A strangled scream loosed from Gabriel’s lips, more that of a beast than a man, and he hurled a piece of fallen column into the side of the canyon. “ANIMALS!” he screamed. “She gave them everything and they slaughtered her like the animals they are!” Fire and shadow burned at his fingertips, his eyes wild and hungry.

“Burn. They will all burn! I will deafen them with the sounds of their own screams!” he declared.

Palutena said nothing, torn between her natural compassion and her grief. She longed to try and talk Gabriel down, but at the same time she could not ignore the blood-soaked ruins of genocide around them.

Before she could make a choice a voice rang out.

“Father! Lady Palutena! Over here!” It was Trevor, or Alucard as he was known these days. “I have found survivors!”

-

The young Nabatean woman before them was barely more than a girl. Her long green hair was ruffled and matted with sweat and blood and her eyes were those of a cornered animal. The dagger she held shook in her hand.

Behind her were a small handful of Nabateans, all about her age. They huddled together away from the strangers.

“L- leave us!” cried the girl. “Leave us! Y-you h-h-ave taken everything al-already!” she seemed on the verge of tears.

Palutena laid a gentle hand on Gabriel’s shoulder, stepping in front of him. “Child, we are not your foes. We are your family,”

At the girls confused look, gabriel spoke. “We are the parents of the Goddess Sothis. Dracula: the Lord of Darkness, and Palutena: Lady of Light.”

The girl shook her head. “P-parents? The Goddess- Mother- had parents?!”

Palutena turned to Gabriel. “Show her.”

Gabriel nodded, and the shadows and blood bent to his will. The darkness wrapped around him and twisted. Molded. Changed to suit him.

Moments later, a great black dragon stood before them. A dark shadow of Sothis’ form.

The knife clattered from the girls hands and she fell to her knees sobbing. Prayers came out in a jumble, the other survivors quickly joining in.

Palutena kneeled down and wrapped her arms around the child, her grandchild, and whispered gently. Moments later, Gabriel assumed his true form and joined them.

“All will be well, little one. All will be well,”

When the girl had calmed down a bit they rose together. “Now then, tell us your name child.” Said Palutena.

The girl bowed her head. “Exalted ones. I am Seiros. Firstborn daughter of Sothis, the Progenitor God.”

-

They stayed with Sothis and her small band of survivors for some time. They taught them their magics, their powers, and how to take their beastly forms at will. They guided her, taught her rage and mercy. Taught her compassion and cruelty.

They stood by her as she raised an army of those still loyal to the Goddess Sothis. Those who were horrified by the genocide at the Red Canyon. Many were even family of the Ten Elites, horrified by their relatives actions. They stood by her as she became a leader. A hero. A Queen.

Her army grew with every smashing victory. Her strength grew, as did the legend surrounding Seiros, the Chosen One.

And when the moment of her final victory, the killing of the traitor King Nemesis, they stood by here there too.

-

Seiros sat in her tent, staring down at the sword in her hands. The last thing that remained of her mother. Her final legacy. She traced the bumps in the bone, the rune engraved on the Crest Stone, her calcified heart.

She was barely aware when Dracula and Palutena entered the tent. 

“You are leaving now,” she said, not really asking.

“Our time in this world grows short.” said Palutena gently. “Justice has been done. Our daughter may sleep easy now,”

Seiros clenched her jaw. “You can forget her that easily?” she asked clodly. “Cast aside her memory like so much trash?!”

“Never,” said Dracula firmly. “She could never be forgotten. But We must let her pass on. We must let her rest,”

Tears fell upon the Sword of the Creator. “I don’t know if I can,”

“Then try, Seiros,” said Palutena gently. “Try. That is all we ask,”

Unable to speak past the lump in her throat she nodded once. Stiffly. “We love you child. Your mother did as well. Never forget that,” said Palutena as she embraced the girl. Dracula did as well.

A moment later they were gone.

-

Seiros stood alone in the face of the rising sun. The Ten Elites had been executed for their crimes, their remains returned to their families. She had shown a measured hand and spared them. The cycle of vengeance must be broken.

Macuil, Cichol and the others were travelling around, seeing to their forces, but Seiros could only feel a tremendous sense of... futility. Her people were avenged. What now?

“Milady!” cried one of her Generals, coming up to her. “Milady, we await your orders.”

For a long moment Seiros said nothing Finally, she said “Your Goddess is avenged. Go home,”

The general said nothing for a moment before he spoke once more. “With all due respect, your Holiness, we did not fight for the Goddess,” Seiros turned to face him, her face lined with confusion. “We fought for you.”

[picklesmin]

Outside A Galaxy Of My Own

(How many misadventures can one have on one planet? How many days trekked, relationships forged? How many hopeful smiles and bitter tears? How many lives lost and altered forever? (My very first fic here and Pikmin fic in general, inspired by the great @pikfic!)

-

Chapter 1: Dew, Spark, and Cinder

-

The familiar screech of horrific and yet entrancing beasts was the first thing Olimar heard as he entered the cool air of the early dawn. Even from the damp ground he stood on Olimar could see the monsters in the distance. He stretched and was actually quite certain he heard something crack. He was way too old for this.

“Another day in the grime, huh Louie? ...Louie? Louie!” Glancing over his shoulder, he was barely surprised to see his underling still there behind the glass window of the ship, crumbs on his face. “Get out here!”

Sighing as the younger Hocotation apathetically trudged out, Olimar turned the dials on the Onion and summoned pikmin from the ship’s hull. Their little comrades slid down the legs, eager to help as always.

“Morning, everyone. Sleep well?” Olimar gave the pikmin and Louie a friendly smile. “We’ve still yet to explore a certain part of the woods that I have on my map.” Pressing a button, a small pixelated map appeared on one of the many screens adorning his suit. “But luckily it’s at least close by.”

Louie bobbed his head dully, clearly oh so excited. “So I take purples and smash the creeping chrysanthemum while you harvest? Lost almost twenty yesterday.”

“Right…” Olimar’s optimism faded for a moment, a more somber one overtaking, as it did for the pikmin. The snagret had leaped out of nowhere, leaving only masacre behind and tortured screams. Just more sounds to add to Olimar’s nightmares and eternal guilt.

“That sounds good Louie.” He tried for a teasing smile. “I thought I was the Captain here.” It wasn’t quite returned, leaving the Hocotation sighing and wondering why he even bothered.

The trek wasn’t long, and the group passed the corpse of a bulborb that they ran out of time to displace before sunset. Or rather, one Olimar had to all but physically drag Louie away from cooking—and subsequently becoming a meal himself.

Hammering the hostile plant beast was easy enough, and routine even by this point. Still, Olimar found himself standing by cautiously, always waiting to see if he needed to step in. He was never sure if his concerns over his younger charge were that of being a Captain, or even of being a father.

Whistling his group away before the corpse flattened them, Olimar began to order his pikmin to the pellet posies. And...he immediately stopped.

Half their usual size and appearing frail and almost hunched over, the flowers were a baffling sight and even Louie blinked in surprise.

“Are they sick?”

Olimar felt his fear spike. Was that possible? There were so many uncharted dangers on this planet, so was there one that could poison entire gardens? Botanical threats were so many, and he already knew pikmin could become sickly and hostile. Was this only the start of a catastrophic wipe out?

Before his thoughts could terrify him further, his pikmin were already trying to destroy the flower. With just a kick the stem snapped like a stale green bean, and Olimar was too grimly fascinated to stop them.

The first clue that something was definitely different about the offspring was how each pellet only produced a single sprout, despite the colors corresponding with their onion. Olimar was nervous to make his way over, and all the more nervous to pick what appeared to be only half formed leaves.

Three baby, legitimately baby pikmin popped out.

“Captain Olimar, I sense something off about these pikmin. Some sort of deficiency is causing their suboptimal height.”

It was difficult to really focus individually on pikmin when you always had a large group, but sure enough the baby leaves really did seem to be that...babies.

“Not only that, but their leaves appear damaged or maybe even underdeveloped. Do you think the state of them has anything to do with the state their posies were found in?”

The Hocotation cast another look over his shoulder to the slightly withered looking stems. Or...what remained of them at least. They did appear so weak he was surprised they could manage to hold themselves upright.

“Peculiar,” Olimar mused with a stunned blink. “I’ve never seen such a thing...but then again, those pellet posies were incredibly small. I thought perhaps they were merely buried deep but...maybe the flowers really were stunted.”

Olimar bent down to the baby pikmin’s level and he tentatively reached towards one of their stems. With the utmost gentleness he ran a hand along the smooth leaf. It didn’t appear rough or stiff as a dry leaf would be and invoked a pleasant chitter from the pikmin. It didn’t seem to be in any pain.

But what did this mean for the pikmin then? Were they unable to ever mature? Did they not even have the same abilities their brethren did? He knew the only way to be sure of such a thing was to test that theory, but the leafs may not be able to survive the results!

“My hypothesis is that they will be generally slower than leaf pikmin as well. And leafs are already so slow! What will you use them for, Captain Olimar?”

“I…” The man blinked, at a loss. “I don’t know, actually.” It was already clear these babies wouldn’t be able to hold their own in battle. Would he, for the first time, have pet pikmin?

“Well...it’s clear that I won’t be able to have you three in combat,” he told the baby leafs. “Unless…” Perhaps he could test something.

Olimar turned back to the colony of normal sized pikmin. At the very least they didn’t appear to be viewing their new siblings with contempt. They seemed, thankfully, as accepting with the children as any.

Language barriers were always so difficult, leading to so many frustrating situations, and, unfortunately...many deaths in the field. Tapping his cheeks enough times and gesturing seemed to clue a yellow pikmin on what it was supposed to do. Although the creature certainly seemed hesitant.

“It’s alright,” Olimar assured the pikmin. “I’ll be fine, I just want to test something.”

After a moment the pikmin pressed its cheek against the other’s glove, and Olimar hissed as a powerful shock had him withdraw quickly. His pikmin shrugged apologetically.

Olimar shook his hand for a moment and then he bent down to the newly harvested yellow leaf. The tiny pikmin pressed its head against their leader’s hand as well, but Olimar was concerned when he barely felt the slightest spark. It was as weak as a static shock from a mere bedsheet.

“Hmm, quite concerning. It would appear these tiny pikmin indeed are far less stronger than the others!” the ship buzzed. “I’m unsure of what use they may be, Captain Olimar!” The machine didn’t want to say the little things were useless, but Olimar knew it was thinking it.

“I’ll...figure something out.” The Hocotation looked over to where the tiny critters were attempting to climb a berry stem. The poor little things could barely manage with their stubby legs.

Olimar looked over to Louie, who seemed to be watching the miniature pikmin as well.

“They’re small. Too small, aren’t they?”

Olimar cast Louie a wayward grin. “Oh they’ll find their place.” Hopefully not in a monster's belly.

-

That evening secure in his ship Olimar pulled back from an email with a fond laugh as he shook his head. His family had been quite excited by the thought of him having permanent pikmin...at least for the time being. And oh, trust his children to come up with the cutest names! The baby pikmin had crept curiously over, tilting their heads at the glowing monitor.

“Well, you three, what do you think about having your own names? Hm?” They continued looking inquisitively at him. “Dew, Spark, and Cinder.” Saying each individual name, he pointed to the corresponding pikmin. Spark of course being the yellow, Cinder the red, and Dew the blue.

Olimar gestured over to where he saw his young cohort heating up a bisque. “Dewy, and Louie!” he exclaimed, snickering at the rhyme the pikmin didn’t understand and that Louie seemed to roll his eyes at.

“You’re naming them now?” Louie asked, a brow raising. “You said that’s a bad idea. Can’t get attached.” Not that Louie had the inclination to adore the little aliens as his Captain did. He respected them and led them as Olimar did, but it was harder for the younger man to feel strong bonds so easily.

“Not all of them,” Olimar said, smile falling. He didn’t seem sure of it himself. “Just, er, these three. My children named them actually. I believe we have our first pygmy pikmin, Louie! They’re a lot more underdeveloped than the others and don’t seem like they might grow. Even their leaves are only half formed. I was thinking in time, they can help out through the ship. Or stay close to our campsite. I’ll find...something.”

He did want to find use for them, not just because it was routine for Olimar by this point, but he didn’t know what emotional depth pikmin had, let alone these three. He didn’t want them to think that he thought they were less capable. Which...was sort of true.

“Like I said, they’ll find their place.”

Louie watched the pygmies climb into his boss’s lap. “Like in your lap?” He sounded far more cautious about the situation. This planet was hostile and unforgiving and he knew at any second their new little friends could go from Olimar’s arms to a Bulbear’s stomach. And he also knew the...emotional repercussions that could have on Olimar.

The captain’s eyes were captured by the wide ones gazing up at his, and piercing into his heart. He knew what Louie was thinking, and he was thinking the same thing. Naming the pygmies...it was a very dangerous idea, but his children came up with the idea. And he couldn't just not do it.

“They’ll stay in the ship.”

Louie watched as Cinder clambered her way over to him and shook his leg as she tried to hug it. “Okay,” he shrugged.

-

The wide array of space at their window, Olimar peered into the black canvas littered with stars. It had been an interesting day, one he was eager to record if his exhaust allowed it. And also, if he could find time between dashing back and forth from trying to keep the pygmies from getting into mischief. It seemed that them being as different as they were made them far less inclined to listen to him. It felt like when Oliver and Lily were toddlers!

“Good night, Louie.” The captain yawned, and also pat the interior of the ship as a silent good night. He couldn’t resist a grin over at his charge resting in the other bunk. “Don’t let the bed pikmin bite.”

“Nnn….bite back,” was the only half asleep mumble he received as Louie buried deeper under his blankets.

Dew, Spark and Cinder were still at Olimar’s feet and he gestured to the cargo where the leaf children could sleep. They scurried passed him into his bunk.

“There’s barely enough room for me, you know!” he told the leaf babies as he discarded his suit in favor of some furry pajamas. He didn’t seem to have any objection to the idea however.

As Olimar tiredly lay on the bed he pushed himself up as the pygmies settled on him. They merely sat there, their cute little stems bobbing around as they looked at him with adoring eyes. Olimar felt his heart threatening to melt on him.

“You really need to stop with that before you make me adore you,” he told them, but he knew it was too late for that. “You probably can't even understand me...can you?” The three leafs tilted their heads and Olimar chuckled. “Probably not…It’s very late. You should go to sleep now,” he told the young pikmin. They curled into him like kittens and Olimar sighed. He couldn’t deny it was nice to hold someone after so many nights cold and alone.

-

(Hope I didn’t do too badly, still getting the world down despite my endless researching haha. We started on a cute note...but it probably won’t stay cute for long ;)

Although each chapter is a story on its own many will still have linking elements, such as Dew, Spark, and Cinder. Longer ones will also be specified in parts in the chapter title.

There will be no romance, most likely (besides Olimar’s wife), and everything will be more platonic, especially considering Louie and Olimar and Charlie and Alph, as those take on more parental dynamics here! We’ll range from super cute to super sad and everything in between. Forgive me if the formatting is off, this is my very first attempt!)