#phe post!! | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

milksuu · 1 year ago

Text

Sorry, Mom. I'm The New Cleaning Lady For Heartsteel

Pairings: various!Heartsteel x f!reader

Status: on-going (Cross posted on AO3)

Content/Warnings: 18+ content, explicit themes, suggestive language

Summary: Identity theft was a crime—that was obvious. But when it meant paying off the bills for basically existing and your mother’s hospital expenses, committing a felony didn’t seem like a bad thing. It was like that one quote, from that one band, with that one hit song: “Two sides to a story but they never tell me side.”

Or…something like that. Wait, what was their name again? Heartsteel? Sounds like a dating sim game.

[Reader takes the identity of her mother, who had been hired to be the new cleaning lady for an up and coming boy band named ‘Heartsteel’. Obviously, there’s no way they would ever find out. But that was a joke. Because they’re definitely finding out: one by one.]

“You…brought your own cleaning supplies?”

“You always need to be prepared, young man,” you replied, adjusting your duck-yellow cleaning gloves. They squeeked and flopped comically around your hand and fingers.

“Ma’am, you do understand today is solely the house tour.” The man folded his arms neatly against his chest, white brow raised. “In order to rely on you fully, you’ll need to be familiar with the estate first. I thought we discussed this beforehand. That and…we have cleaning supplies to provide you with here.”

You paused at the grand modern entrance. You lifted your bucket full of sponges, brushes, and cleaning spray from the dollar store. 'Buy-one-get-one' on all cleaning supplies was the grand deal of the day. How could you pass a penny-pinching bargain? Swallowing your shame, you settled the cheap items on the pristine granite floors.

“Oh, is that so? Must’ve slipped my mind. Age will do that to you.” You forced a chuckle, adjusting your sterile mask across your youthful face. “That and, I have such a passion for cleaning. I can't help myself. I see the inside of a house, and I just have to clean it. I’m sure you could understand that.”

“I don’t believe I could,” your employer said dryly. “Anyway, if you will, follow me.”

You nodded and shuffled along accordingly. As you stared into the back of his immaculately pressed business attire, a new-found horror struck through you: you had no clue what your employer’s name was. Frantically, you scavenged your pockets. From it, you pulled out a business card, holding it so close to your face you smelled the tinge of clean cologne.

YONE

RIOT RECORDS

DJ / PRODUCER

EMAIL: [email protected]

TELEPHONE: XXX-XXX-XXXX

“The bottom floor consists of all of the amenities; gym, entertainment area, recording studio and so on.” Yone stated as he stepped into the open-kitchen plan. When he regarded you again, you awkwardly plunged the card back into your pants pocket. “The boys have their own scheduled chores every week. They’re expected to do it without you having to help them. I’m trying to keep them humble, but easier said than done. Refer to the chore calendar on the fridge. And try not to interfere with it too much.”

“Okay—who switched my protein powder with flour?” Behind an opened cabinet, a heavy-muscled stacked man growled. “Guys. Seriously. This stuff’s expensive. Where’d it go?” When he poured the contents out into the trash can, he plucked out a note from the bottom of the canister. The small print read:

‘Protein powder tastes like dog food.’’

The weight of realization punched him square between the eyes. He threw open the pantry, where dog kibble was stored in a tub at the bottom marked ‘Ernest’. Sett pulled open the container, and sure enough, found his protein powder and scooper. There was no mistaking his favorite smell of cinnamon crunch isolate, now mixed with the scent of dry-bacon kibble. Another note pasted the inside lid:

‘Woof–Woof ฅ՞•ﻌ•՞ฅ’

“A–phe–li–os,” the name gritted between his canines. His ears flattened against his untamed hair, and crumpled the note to dust in his palm. “Oh–Ho. Mess with me all you want; but never mess with my gains. I’m gonna’ prank him back so hard tonight, he’s gonna’ be begging me to stop.”

“Sett,” Yone coughed, grabbing the Vistayan's attention. “We have a guest today. Our new cleaning lady.”

“Oh, sorry about that.” Sett wiped his powdered hand against his sleeveless shirt. He reached and took your rubber glove with a squelch. “Hey, how’s it goin’, Ma’am. The name’s Sett.”

You swallowed hard, hoping your glove would remain securely covering your hand. You feared if he pulled back, he would reveal a hand that wasn't so wrinkled for someone supposedly in their late-fifties. And that was according to your mother’s age printed on her driver’s license. Thankfully, you could tell he restrained himself to a delicate shake.

“Would talk more but gotta hit the gym. Nice meetin’ yah though,'' Sett started away, and called back over his shoulder. “Mom, can you take care of Phel for me? I dunno' where he hid the dog food for Ernest.”

Yone exhaled a silent sigh, and part of you felt pity for your employer. He seemed like a parent with a tag-team of overbearing children running around the house. Being a single parent was difficult; you knew this first hand from your own up-bringing. It made you grateful for your mother’s patience and attention. It was the reason you were here in the first place.

“Let’s continue with the tour upstairs,” Yone said, motioning you to a loft-style staircase. “The second floor consists of all the bedrooms and laundry room. At the end of the hall is my room. As it stands, it’s completely off limits to everyone, including yourself.” He turned a sharp chin in your direction, “Am I understood?”

You gulped and pressed your shoulders straight. “Of course.”

“Mommy, help me!” A bed of green hair bounced to Yone’s side, tugging at his tailored suit. “Kayn’s bullying me again. But I didn’t do anything wrong, I swear.”

“You’re such a crappy liar.” The presumed assailant, Kayn, stomped out of the hallway bathroom. Magenta hair stuck to his furrowing brows. With just a towel wrapped around his steaming waist, his abdominal muscles tensed, pointing aggressively at his target. “I was trying to shower in peace, until bubblegum pop princess over here came barging in trying to take selfies of himself. Did you know people usually shower naked? I’d like my junk not to be posted on social media, unless I’m the one doing it. For cash.”

“It’s not my fault you’re always going over your shower limit. News flash: we each only get fifteen-minutes. But you’re always breaking the rules! You know I take my selfies at the same time, at the same place, every single day. So how about you do us all a favor, and get some better time management?”

Kayn raised a vein popping fist into the air. “How about I get you a better face instead?"

Ezreal cried fake sparkling tears, cowering further behind their producer.

“Enough. The both of you,” Yone tightened around his words like a leash, restraining the quarreling pair. “For once, I’d like for you two to at least pretend you get along in front of others.”

The two whined and grumbled under their breaths till they fell to a silent agreement. But the peace treaty wasn’t upheld for long. You saw a zap of yellow from the corner of your eye. The image was so fast, you thought you must’ve imagined it—Nope. You definitely saw something. Kayn’s towel knot popped loose. And it wasn’t caused by an event of divine intervention.

The towel billowed towards the ground. And the world felt as if it was turning in slow motion, like one of those car chase movies with excessive explosions. Except, the only explosion here would be your very own heart.

Sure, you took an anatomy class here and there. In high school, you remembered the penis joke’s and games, and they never flustered you. Heck, not even when your friends set your desktop screen to a .gif of dicks spinning in circles—you found that hilarious. And when anatomy classes began in college, they were all very clinical, rudimentary, and otherwise a snooze fest.

But seeing one in real life when you’ve never had a boyfriend or a one night stand, was truly groundbreaking. Earth shattering, even.

Penis (en)counter: 1

While you were stuck in your prison of naïve embarrassment, Ezreal laughed and pulled out his cell phone, camera light shuttering a mile a minute.

“You little shi—!” Time sped forward again. With fast reflexes of his own, Kayn whipped the towel and knot back in place. “That’s it. You’re dead.”

“Uh–Oh. Time to run again,” Ezreal quipped, zooming off down the stairs.

With all bark and full bite, Kayn vanished like a cloud of smoke in pursuit. You coughed against the smog, while Yone merely swatted his hand back and forth, dissipating the gray wisps.

“You’ll have to excuse them,” he commented. “They share the same room, but have vastly different personalities. I arranged most of them together, thinking it’d help them understand each other on a deeper level. And ultimately, help them perform better together in the studio and on stage. My efforts are…yet to be determined.”

“That’s alright. Can’t be easy for young men their age to share anything. Especially with them being full of energy, testosterone, and other things. O-Oh, to be young once more…ah-ha…” you laughed nervously. Oh, God. What the heck were you saying? Honestly, you had to give pardon to yourself. You were still trying to recover from seeing your first penis up close and personal.

The image would be forever burned in your mind.

You were pulled from your self-conscious thoughts. Down the hall, a pair of shadowed eyes peeked through a sliver of door and frame. When your gaze locked together, the other pair of eyes shifted shyly from side to side. As if a poltergeist existed within the room, the visage faded back into the uncanny crack of darkness. The door creaked closed, with an audible click and lock.

Yone pursued straight to the door, and you stood a few paces back. If there was any chance that a ghost was inside living rent-free, you wouldn't be the first it possessed. You weren't a certified Ghostbuster.

But you also weren't a certified Dustbuster, either. No one will know, know one will know, you chanted the comforting hymn.

“Aphelios. Open the door. I know you’re in there. I can see the computer light flashing,” Yone stated, rattling the door knob. “Where’s the kibble for the dog? Sett told me you have it somewhere.”

There was a beat in the air. From behind the door, you heard feet pacing back and forth, and the sounds of finger taps against a phone screen. Yone’s phone pinged with an alert. He pulled it out, and opened his text messages.

‘I can’t open the door all the way. I set the bucket of dog food to fall on Sett’s head when he comes in. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ’

“For the love of…no more pranks today." Yone pinched the bridge of his nose with a groan. "But I doubt you could even manage that. Whatever trap you’ve ensembled, take it down—now. And put the dog’s food back in the pantry. Unless you want to donate a cut of your earnings every month to Ernest’s pet store bill.”

Another pause, followed by begrudging phone taps.

‘Fine, m O T h E r…(¬_¬")’

“That might take him a few. Depending how intricate the set up was. I would be surprised if the only thing involved in this scheme was just the dog food.” Yone motioned you back down the stairs. “Last thing to see is the outdoor space.”

Continuing with the tour, you passed through the lower floor, stepping down a hallway decorated with awards and magazine clippings. From commercial modeling gigs to sold out venues, your eyes glistened at the polished look the group was slowly cultivating. Which you had to admit, completely contradicted their personal lives.

When you reached a sliding glass door that stretched from floor to ceiling, you stepped out onto a landscaped deck. Lush modern garden trims, a shaded outdoor lounge, and smooth sandstone pavement decorated the space. At the backend, an infinity pool rested in pristine stillness.

At the head of the pool, a person of sculpted bronze physique posed in swimwear on a lounge chair. When you approached along with your chaperone, he picked up his tropical drink, and tilted it in a cheering gesture.

“Well, well, well. If it isn’t Mama gracing me with his presence. And look's like someone else is with him, too.” The man basking in the sun's rays and oil slicked, shucked his sunglasses onto his dread locks. “Let me guess. This must be the new cleaning lady you hired to pick up after our mess.”

“To a certain degree,” Yone replied. “But not all of the mess, K’Sante. Out of everyone, you should know better.”

“I only joke, Mama.” He grinned smoothly, taking a sip of his frozen alcoholic refresher. “Say, have you seen Sett? I told him to come join me for a tan by the pool. If he wants his muscles to truly pop, he needs to use some oil and not be allergic to the sun. The man is whiter than the sky is bright today.”

As he laughed to himself, Ernest left his chew toy at the far side of the pool, and came to sniff your shoes. With a smile, you slipped a very small piece of your long sleeve up, allowing him to sniff at your skin. The dog lapped his tongue around his slobbering chops, barking delightedly and pawing for you to pet him. You were more than happy to oblige.

These gloves came in handy after all, you thought pleasantly as globs of saliva fell in heaps over your fingers.

“What’s this? Ernest taking a liking to the cleaning lady already,” K’Sante mused at the sight. “Barely warmed up to us when we first met. We won’t mention the illegal trespassing but, call me impressed.”

With a wink, he flicked his sunglasses back down to the bridge of his nose. “That or he has a ‘ting for older women. Can’t say I blame ‘em. An experienced woman has a certain power that’ll make any grown man cry. And from my own experience, it is never for mercy.”

Oh, boy. You couldn’t imagine your mother being interested in the cougar life-style. Not that you would approve of it. And you were certain your father would descend from the heavens and deliver the backhand of God to any young man who dared otherwise.

Before Yone could address the unsavory statement, Ezreal burst through the backyard sliding doors. Still possessed with laughter, he hopped and skipped over pool chairs and tables. The merriment stopped short when Kayn caught up to the cheeky idol, snatching his wrist which held the phone. From the staggering halt, the phone slipped from Ezreal’s hold, somersaulting towards the pool.

“M-My phone!” Ezreal paled at the thought of losing thousands of stored photos of himself—Oh, and the blackmail photos he was going to use against Kayn, too.

Yanking his wrist free, Ezreal pursued the device. But Ernest’s rubber hotdog toy squealed beneath him, forcing him off balance. Kayn latched an arm around Ezreal's slim waist, and pressed him safely against his bare chest.

He huffed against Ezreal's ear. “You can’t swim, you idiot. Remember? Just let it go.”

Ernest barked at the surmounting commotion. Being the valiant guard dog with the perfect pedigree, he bounded on his thick paws to catch Kayn by the towel, with all the intent to keep them both from falling in. What a good boy! Unfortunately for Kayn, Ernest bit a bit more than he could chew.

Kayn’s voice bass boosted ten-octaves lower. “MY DAMN ASS!”

W-Whose voice was that? Was that even the same person? The thought rattled through you.

A chunk of Kayn's soft meat condensed in the jaws of a furry devil. A shock travelled up the nerves of his spine, into the the muscle fibers of his arm, shoving Ezreal forward. Ezreal flailed his hands in the air, desperate to find some semblance of balance—with no luck, at all. Fumbling on his tip-toes, Ezreal plummeted into the pool with a splash. Kayn stumbled from the after-shock of his spirit being bitten straight through his buttcheeks. His feet met the cursed rubber squeaker, sending him following suit into the pool. Except, the towel had its own plans. It decided to stay behind and not get involved.

Penis (en)counter: 2

“I heard some commotion, fellas. What’s goin’ on?” Sett stepped out from the sliding doors. He caught witness of Ezreal’s face treading water, gasping for bouts of air. Sett’s muscles popped at the sight, barreling towards the scene. “Don’t worry, Ez. I’m coming for yah, buddy!”

Sett launched himself into the air, preparing the most athletic Olympic dive ever conceived.

Kayn inhaled sharply as he broke through the water's surface tension. Recuperating his breaths, he slicked his wet hair back from his face. Looking down at the waters crystal reflection, an odd shadow grew in size around him. And according to the forecast earlier; there was no chance in Hell of clouds or rain. Lifting his nose to the darkening sky, he blanched in sheer horror. A body, massive enough to eclipse the sun, hurled down like a meteor descending to Earth.

What day was it today, Doomsday? He must've forgot; Kayn never bothered to look at calendar's, anyway.

Back to the painful mistress that was his life; a weak, painful moan escaped him. “You can’t be serious. This isn’t the cool death I deserve—”

Those were Kayn’s final words. A wave rivaling a tsunami consumed him, a random pizza chair float, and the immediate surrounding pool area. Standing in the designated splash zone, pool water soaked your soles, leached into your socks, and dampened your pants to the knees. From K’Sante’s spot, a shot of chlorine or two spiked his drink. He snatched his sunglasses off and shouted the words; “This was the last bit of banana daiquiri mix, you aboas! Now I have to go down to the liquor store and hope they sell it frozen already.”

Yone, with all the grace anyone could hope to be blessed with, merely side-stepped away. A single speck landed on his polished shoes. He narrowed his steely eyes, flicking away the insignificant drop.

You caught something flashing on the second floor of the estate. Looking up, you shielded your eyes from the glaring sun. From one of the windows, you spotted someone holding up a sign. You assumed it was Aphelios. The poster read:

‘4/10 Ezreal. 6/10 Kayn. 10/10 Sett.’

With a dramatic burst through the water, Sett hurled Ezreal over his massive shoulder, and walked out of the pool. Placing Ezreal onto his soaking back, he coughed and gagged against the awful taste of treated water.

He smiled at his new-found savior. “Thanks, Sett. I’m fine, but what about Kayn…”

The group shifted their attention over the silent, lapping water. After a bubble or two, the sight of Kayn’s bare bottom surfaced to the top. Floating like a wet and rounded land-mass, with the additional landmark of a pink dog-bite.

“Kayn! Hang in there, pal!” Sett launched himself once more into the water, creating another wave of soaking magnitude.

Although the drink had already been spoiled, K’Sante reflexively covered the top of his daiquiri glass. “For God’s sake, Sett. Take your time. It’s not like you’re saving the life of an innocent man.”

As chaos continued to ensue around the gang, Yone placed himself at your side. With a shake of his head, he crossed his arms, and sent a ghost of a smile your way.

“Welcome to Heartsteel,” he said. “Your first day starts tomorrow.”

Looks like your identity was safe…for now, at least.

an: thanks for reading! the rest of the this story will most likely just be on my AO3. You can find me @ milksuu. comments and suggestions always welcomed. <3

#heartsteel #league of legends #Heartsteel x reader #kayn x reader #ezreal x reader #aphelios x reader #Sett x reader #K'Sante x reader #Yone x reader #reader insert #league of legends fanfiction #cross posted on ao3 #divider by @benkeibear

1K notes · View notes

jedipoodoo · 9 months ago

Text

Bring Them Home (Sergeant Hunter x Reader)

Notes: SPOILERS FOR SEASON THREE EPISODE TWO: PATHS UNKNOWN. DO NOT READ IF YOU HAVE NOT SEEN THE SEASON THREE PREMIERE. Children, angsty Hunter Edit: STUPID TUNGLR POSTED THIS WHEN I MEANT TO SAVE IT SO PSA-- If you read this before 10pm EST on Feb 27, this one-shot is officially completed so please reread it again and enjoy it in its full glory.

gif by @dreamswithghosts

It had been months since you'd seen Hunter, so of course you and Phee were there when the Marauder touched down in the Archium. Wrecker waved to you both as the ramp lowered, beckoning to someone inside the ship.

Hunter said they were bringing someone with them, but you didn't expect the cadets-- the children --to look so bewildered when they stepped off the ship.

"They're so young," Shep said softly, and you wondered how round and baby-faced they must have been when they left Kamino, the only home they'd ever known.

The three cadets lingered on the steps of the ramp, looking around in earnest while Wrecker waited patiently.

"It smells like Kamino," the tallest said as you approached.

"Mox, did you see the ocean? D'you think they'll let us go swimming?"

"You can do whatever you want here!" Wrecker laughed encouragingly. He gave you his classic thump on the shoulders, and you smiled. It was the happiest you'd seen him since they lost Tech and Omega.

"Hi," You introduced yourself to the cadets, "What're your names?"

"I'm Deke. This is Mox, and that's Stak." The shortest of them stepped forward, while his brothers watched you warily.

"And I'm Phee Genoa, liberator of ancient wonders," Phee smiled warmly at them all.

"Welcome to Pabu," Shep said, "I'm the mayor here. We have a warm bed and fresh food for all of you."

"Thanks," Mox, the tallest, said softly. His arms were crossed over his chest, and Stak's hands fidgeted at his side.

"Wrecker, why don't you and Phee show them the island? I reckon they're as hungry as you."

Wrecker chuckled softly and nodded towards the ship, catching your drift. He beckoned for the kids to follow him. They seemed to trust a clone more than other humans, but that was understandable.

"Have you boys ever heard of Skara Nol?" you heard Phee asking them.

"What's that?" Deke asked.

"It's a big mountain, filled with lots of puzzles!" Wrecker said, waving his arms to demonstrate.

At that point, you'd stepped aboard. The warmth of the sun dissipated as you were enveloped in the Marauder's dim lighting. Hunter sat at the navicomputer to your right, half asleep and blanketed by a hazy blue glow.

"Those boys aren't the only ones who could use a home-cooked meal, you know." You said, putting more weight into your steps so he wouldn't be surprised by your approach.

"I assume you've brought some, then?" He said.

You rolled your eyes and took the canteen of gumbo from your bag.

"Only when you step away from the computer. It won't do you any good to spill it all over Tech's equipment now."

Hunter sighed, and set another diagnostic to run through the files.

"We've got another lead," He said, turning away from the computer. Your heart fluttered at the note of hope in his voice.

"The Intel from the Durands was too old, the kids were all that's left of that lab, but we scraped some data from one of the data banks. We think it could tell us where Hemlock took Omega."

You handed him the spoon, and Hunter tried to eat politely, but it soon gave way to his hunger as he shoveled spoonfuls into his mouth without waiting to chew.

"Careful, you'll make yourself sick," You warned him, "You've been eating too many rations. I'll have to send you off with some real food this time."

Hunter looked up at you, and you used your thumb to wipe some sauce from his chin, but you couldn't quite meet his eyes.

"You could always come with us. How's your leg doing?"

The only reason you hadn't gone with Hunter and Wrecker when they set out to find Omega was because your femur was broken in the same railcar crash that took Tech. Phee had promised to look out for you and keep you from getting too bored while they scoured the galaxy. Despite your protests, you knew that in your injured state, you couldn't be much help at all.

So you made yourself useful in Pabu. You sewed clothes to replace those lost in the tsunami, you looked after children while their parents rebuilt, you made your family's old gumbo recipe for those who were too tired to cook at the end of the day.

Those like Hunter.

"What about the kids? Deke, Mox and...Stak?"

Hunter nodded, "Shep said there were some families on Pabu who could take care of them for now, he even offered to take two of them into his own house."

"Oh," You said softly, "That's kind of him."

Setting the empty canteen to the side, Hunter squeezed one of your hands as it hung at your side.

"Everything alright, cyare?"

"Oh!" After so long without him, you forgot how well he knew you.

"I just...I was hoping we could take them in, take care of them."

Hunter's eyes softened, and finally stood. "I'll admit I thought about it myself, but..."

"Not while Omega's still captured," You finished for him, dropping his hand and folding your arms.

Hunter's thumb brushed against your cheek, begging for you to look at him.

"You remember that night on Ord Mantell, right?" He asked.

You pouted, bottom lip jutting out, "We spent a lot of nights on Ord Mantell." Too many, to be precise.

"You know the one I'm talking about," He cupped your face in both hands, and you looked up at the dark circles beneath his eyes.

And you did know the night he mentioned. It was a full moon, so you could actually see the moon high above all the neons and smoke from the city. Hunter had made you a promise then and there, and you made one to him too. Nothing like marriage, but something like it.

Biting your lip, you reached up to run your thumb over his crows' feet. His eyes closed, blissfully relaxed beneath your touch. You knew how much he needed to find her. He could never forgive himself if anything happened to you, to Wrecker, or any of the cadets they'd just saved.

"I meant what I said that night," He whispered, eyes glistening as his forehead rested against yours, "We'll have our own family some day, something Kamino and the Empire won't ever be able to take from us. We just have to wait a bit longer."

You sniffled just a bit, and buried your face in his chest. You wrapped your arms around his torso, and when he wrapped his arms around you he leaned more of his body weight on you than he usually did. He felt frail, delicate even, like too much pressure in one place would snap him in half.

Hunter needed you, and you needed him.

"I'm coming with you," You whispered. He sighed with relief.

"Let's bring her home."

#tbb spoilers #lizart writes #the bad batch spoilers #the bad batch season 3 #the bad batch season 3 spoilers #hunter x reader #hunter x you #sergeant hunter x reader #tbb hunter x reader

267 notes · View notes

mmms-phe-sideblog · 5 months ago

Text

mmmm phe has some pets :3

My ass was bored today and i did some ✨character development✨ which mainly consisted of giving xem some pets so! That’s what this is! :D

so. This was me contemplating shit originally (i did not in fact have any references for these snakes so most of them i had envisioned. Do Not Exist :,D

don’t take any of the info on the picture above as gospel bcs the names, breeds, etc have completely changed dhjdgddd. last night i mini rabbi hole’d on sneks and actually figured out breeds n allthat

but goddamn that tiger print snake is gender

aaaaaaaand here’s the final-ish designs for the dudes!!

So we’ve got:

Wolf:

Wolf is a red, yellow and black milk snake. She’s named after Wolf Alice, one of Phe’s favourite artists. Also she just thought that naming an animal a completely different animal name was very silly (it was me. I thought that.)

Donny:

Donny’s an albino ball python. His markings are spots rather than the normal splodges (the markings are like the ones on the reference image below). He’s named partially after Donny from Baby Reindeer, partially after xeir uncle and also just because he curls up like a donut.

Cali (not greeny lmao):

Cali’s a smooth green snake (yeah that’s what they’re actually called hdhjvghd) She’s named after both Cali from FunkyFrogBait channel and as a nod to Zerocalcare. It’s 2 funky Netflix shows (tear along the dotted line and this world can’t tear me down) that go very hard and that Phe loves, as they should.

god how i love talking about my oc’s obsessions like i didn’t project all of them onto her :DD

But xey also have a cat! did you forget that?? i don’t blame you if you did bcs i. Didn’t mention him :D

This fucken kibby is called Nikko and is the sweetest little calico you ever did see!! He’s a chubby little fella who will eat. Everything like genuinely he has a problem hdjdhd

please send help /j

Also he’s named after Ashnikko because. Gay Icon. Obviously 🔥🔥

#information n shite #phe post!!#funky-ish? art #my oc #my oc stuff #oc art #oc #original character #my ocs #oc artwork #kinda?#my oc art

3 notes · View notes

ddejavvu · 1 year ago

Note

but like poly! with hangman and rooster though 🤤 the lingering touches, longing looks and sneaking off in and out of the base because the rest of the dagger squad is yet to know of your unconventional relationship with the twoㅡthough it's safe to say that they have the tiniest bit of clue; the taped picture of you in jake’s locker and the necklace of your initial that hangs alongside bradley’s dog tags that may or may not have caught a sliver of their prying eyes.

Natasha waits until both Mickey and Reuben have had their post-hangover breakfasts, buttered toast and a single scrambled egg to go easy on their stomachs. Last night had been wild, and she'd volunteered for designated driver to gather intel while everyone else got drunk. She'd let them wake up on their own time, but once they'd come down for breakfast, she'd decided to ask for their help. When they're downing the last of the orange juice she'd poured for them, she braces her chin in her hands, "Boys?"

They share a look, suspicious when they turn back to her. Reuben speaks first, "Uh oh. Is this why you were bein' so nice to us? You've got some evil plan going?"

"Evil plan," She scoffs, wiping a crumb off of their communal kitchen table, "Don't be so dramatic. I need your help."

"With what?" Mickey's brow wrinkles in a frown, "You're probably the strongest at the table, there's nothing in here you can't move by yourself."

"I need your help spying on Rooster," She informs them, "I think he's got a girlfriend."

Mickey's brow straightens itself out, soaring towards his hairline, "Girlfriend?"

"And I think it's one of the maintenance women on base."

"What makes you say that?" Reuben leans over the table towards her, eager to hear the gossip.

"He's got this necklace that he wears on top of his dog tags," She explains, it's got her initials on it. I know it could be someone else, but I saw a picture taped in his jet the other day, and it was of her. I think they're sneaking around or something."

"Woah!" Mickey snickers, "A picture in the jet? He's already gone. So what, he's keeping her a secret or something?"

"I don't know!" Phoenix urges, "That's what I want you to find out. Don't pry, just keep an eye out with me this next week. I've asked Bob to do the same."

"Will do, Phe," Reuben nods once, headache long forgotten at the prospect of a secret mission, "Fanboy and I'll have the juicy details in no time."

On Tuesday, Fanboy had caught a glimpse of your picture in Bradley's jet. Armed with your appearance, he'd described you to Payback, and the pair had scanned everyone in their vicinity until positively identifying you.

"That's her! That one," Fanboy points, glad that your back is turned so that you can't see the scene he's making, "That's Rooster's girl."

Feeling triumphant upon their discovery, the pair returned to Phoenix, announcing their victory. The trio had set out especially happy that Friday night, planning on getting Bradley blackout drunk and prying the answers out of him.

Friday night drinks are now a sacred ritual among the proudly proclaimed Dagger Squad, and it's not uncommon to see Jake perusing the patrons with one hand on his beer. He doesn't always stick around to play pool, but Bradly's bent over the table now, the necklace with your initials on the chain dangling low over the surface. Phoenix shares a sly grin with Fanboy and Payback over it, and notices Jake wandering off towards the bathrooms.

"Lucky guy," Coyote whistles lowly, "Have you seen the woman he's been messin' around with?"

"Bradley?" Phoenix's brows furrow, but Javy looks confused.

"No," He laughs cautiously, "Hangman. Rooster's got someone too?"

"Whatever," Phoenix shakes her head, "Doesn't matter. I pity the poor girl Jake's got."

Natasha makes it her business to get Rooster drunk, Fanboy and Payback holding back to question him once he's wasted. They're patient enough in their endeavors, sipping their own drinks in the meantime, but Fanboy excuses himself to the bathrooms while they wait.

He comes back entirely too fast, eyes blown wide and hands urgent where they wrap around both Phoenix's and Payback's wrists.

"Guys," He pants, "Get- come with me!"

"What- Hey!" Phoenix grunts as he yanks them off towards the other end of the bar, cringing when he heads straight for the men's bathroom, "Dude, whatever gross shit you found in there, I don't wanna see it!"

"It's not-" Fanboy shakes his head, speechless and gushing all at once, "Just look!"

He swings the door open so hard that it hits the tile on the wall. It also interrupts Jake, who's pressing someone up against the door of an open stall. Oh shit, he's pressing you up against the door of an open stall, his mouth hot and heavy on yours.

You stare wide-eyed at the three intruders, though perhaps if you wanted more privacy you could have let your boyfriend drag you into the supply room out back. It is a public bathroom, it just tends to stay empty except for couples hooking up.

Natasha's previously nice impression of you, only forged by the fact that one of her closest friends loved you enough to make you a permanent fixture in his jet, turns sour instantly. She can't imagine what Bradley will feel when she tells him you've been cheating on him, much less with Jake.

"Hangman," Payback's sharp voice cuts through the awkward silence of the bathroom, "What the hell are you doing, man?"

"I'm kissing my girlfriend," He drawls, like it's the most obvious thing in the world, "Could you give us a little privacy, guys?"

"That's Bradley's girlfriend," Natasha narrows her eyes at you, "He's got a picture of you in his jet, and a necklace with your initials on it."

Your eyes widen slightly, and you murmur, "He's got a picture of me in his jet?"

Jake stares between you and Phoenix, watching as her face turns down in a disapproving frown, "Yeah, he does. He must really like you, and you're out here with someone else?"

"Oh-" You start, eyes widening along with Jake's, "No, it's not-"

"Oh, it's not what it looks like?" She interrupts, scoffing disgustedly, "Save it. Listen, I'm gonna tell Bradley about this, and then I'm gonna tell Penny you're bumming around here breaking hearts. You'll be lucky if you get away with a ring of the bell."

"No!" You cry, and Jake shouts sternly, "Phoenix, wait!"

But it's too late, and she's gone, wandering through the seat of people to find Rooster.

Jake lets his arms fall from around your waist and you both start towards the door, but Fanboy and Payback don't budge where they stand. Both are regarding you with disapproving looks, and you feel defensive as Jake's shoulders stiffen at their behavior.

"Listen, guys, you've got it all wrong. I know about Rooster, and he knows about me. We-" Jake runs a hand through his hair, "We're doing this- I dunno, throuple thing. He knows we're in here together, he chose this outfit for her tonight."

It's a flattering outfit, of course. But you're sure it's the least of their worries, as they process what Jake's just told them.

"Oh." Fanboy mutters, "So you're- it's all cool?"

"Well not now," Jake sneers, "Phoenix is about to have us thrown overboard!"

"Right," Payback steps out of the way, already intent on tracking the brunette down, "Phe- wait!"

He stops her just before she reaches Bradley, and she looks back at him exasperatedly. You're quick to follow, and she looks at you with her face wrinkled in disdain.

Bradley's, however, lights up at your arrival, and he sets his cue down, "Y/N! Hey, baby, wasn't sure I'd see you tonight. Thought Hangman might keep you in that shitty bathroom the whole time."

Phoenix's head snaps towards Bradley, her brows furrowed as she watches him keenly.

"Bradley, uh- I wanted to-" You sidestep his hug, approaching Phoenix with shame in your chest that you shouldn't be bearing. Somehow she's made you feel guilty for something you haven't done, and you want to make things right.

"I'm dating the both of them" You inform her in a meek voice, "Uh- Bradley and Jake. I would never cheat on anyone, or- or prowl a bar just to break someone's heart. I know what it looked like, but- I'm really sorry we confused you. If I had known you knew, I- I would have said something."

All in all, Phoenix feels a little embarrassed. She knows she did the right thing by trying to tell Bradley about it, but she'd jumped to the wrong conclusion, and all eyes are on her as she figures out how to proceed.

"So they know...?" She glances between both men, who nod casually.

"Yeah," You join, "It's- it's something we're trying out, a polyamory sort of thing."

"Oh." Is what she settles on, "Uh- I'm sorry. For threatening you, and lecturing you, and... yeah."

"It's alright," You assure her, sticking your hand out for a handshake. She goes to take it, but backs off last-minute, and something spikes in your chest straight at your heart.

"Uh- no hard feelings." She promises, hand down by her side again, 'But I saw you and Hangman in there, and I don't know where that hand has been."

#bradley bradshaw x reader #jake seresin x reader #hangman x reader #rooster x reader #hangman x reader x rooster #jake seresin x reader x bradley bradshaw #bradley bradshaw x reader x jake seresin #rooster smut #bradley bradshaw smut #jake seresin smut #hangman smut

994 notes · View notes