#phantom spam no regrets

[cardi-c]

c: drenrom44

+ the final

[johnlocsin-johnyakuza]

How Sifu taught me not to give up

For @goldenhydreigon47, @theelispace, @deceitfulmelvinator, @katanafoxdrawsthings, @experiment14-12, @oogaboogaspookyman, @jokurr-d-phantom, @akachan3000, @kid-az and anyone else who see's this post.

If you have been watching my gameplay on Sifu, I could assume you know what the game is. It is a Kung-Fu styled beat-em up game, the story about a martial arts student embarking on a journey of revenge against the 5 martial arts masters responsible for the death of their father. The game is very difficult with a large learning curve with it, with multiple mechanics you'd have to master. Defending against enemies, attacking, parrying, dodging, learning all the skills available. Sifu has a death mechanic where every time you die, you'll age up, and while you will be healed, if you pass and die over the age of 70, it's game over. You wouldn't get through by just button mashing, you'd have to practice your moves, learn your enemies, and being able to react and counter. Sifu doesn't play around, just like Sekiro. Sifu is all about taking your time to grow and learn as the player, not rushing things. The aging shows the player how long it can take for someone to learn and improve over your lifetime. Spamming wouldn't work, you have to engage all of the games systems, and Sifu's system of combat is amazing, the game is meant to be learned, studied, and not brute forced.

Upon playing through the game, avenging my characters father at the end, you could expect applause, but instead... remorse. You end up becoming a killer, killing someone who murdered our characters family, sure they killed our father, but now I was the killer. This led to the bad ending, you may have achieved your goal, won, and pushed through quitting on a path, you grew, but what for? This puts the game in an empathetic view. Exacting revenge wasn't how the game wanted me to tackle it. You could die over and over, like a cycle, and that's what the game can be, a cycle that keeps going if you don't break it. That's when the second playthrough starts, with another goal, Wude. In ancient Chinese martial arts, Wude is the idea where one must possess both strong character and admirable behavior to overcome any obstacle.

Showing our adversaries mercy in the face of hostility shows our respect to them rather falling to their violent level. Instead of pushing through, you now have to learn to quit. Quit playing aggressively, quit going on the offensively, quit trying to avenge your father, because that's never wanted he wanted you to do anyways. He didn't want you to weaponize your rage to become a murderer, he wanted you to grow. Turn your passion into patience, and harden your determination, but not to forgetting empathy. Sifu isn't a game about punching and kicking, but change your way you think about fighting, and seeing life's challenges.

Sifu taught me how to be okay with letting go with what you think is your main objective. Sifu is about forgiveness, forgiving others, and yourself, it's about letting go of rage, anger, hatred, sadness, self-negativity. As easier as the easier path of giving up can be, the much more difficult path of forgiveness and compassion is more encouraged by the game, and by picking the harder path of letting go of pain, anger, and vengeance, our character smiles.

I was used to giving out before reaching the finish line, and living with that regret. I regret not doing enough for my family, I regret not trying harder to succeed in my studies, I regret not always forgiving myself and continuing to hate myself, I regret a-lot of things that I started and not having the motivation to follow through with. It's why me becoming a more determined and stronger person means so much to me, for the satisfaction that I stuck with something. As silly as it sounds, I'm so proud of myself. Even if Sifu, a game about fighting taught me how to stick through things when they're hard, in equal measure, it shows you permission to let go and move on, refraining the choices of not continuing down a path as steps in a cycle, rather than quitting.

Had I not let go of these paths and goals that I had, and trying to forget and run away from them, I wouldn't be the person I am writing this, and actually... I've never felt so much more happier in where I am.

Sifu may look like a story of revenge, but its a tale of growth in spite of vengeance. How quitting and giving up are two very different things. To quit is not to mean defeat, mindfully stepping away is not a failure, even more so if you wish to come back. Sifu didn't teach me to just keep going, but to refrain my life's failures, my middling achievements, my inability to get through this endless stack of work. It helped refrain all of that, as another step in my path to becoming who I am. Even when you quit, you're not a failure. If you let go of hatred, pain, frustration, and self-negativity, you could grow even higher than where you could be.

It was as Kiryu said:

"Some are born with talent, and some aren't. That's true. But that said... Those with talent never make it through talent alone. You have to overcome. Find boundaries, and break them. The only way to grow is by overcoming challenges.”

[sammy-deserves-better]

Stupid AUs I’ve thought about with the new TD cast

Persona 5 AU: I haven’t thought about it that much I just know that MK, Nichelle, Axel and Bowie would be in the phantom thieves and MK’s thief name would be something like Bandit

Danganronpa AU: Every single time a murder occurs everyone goes to Scary Girl but she’s always like ‘I NEVER GOT TO DO IT IN TIME IM SO MAD’, I think it would be funny if she was a survivor because even the mastermind thought she was going to either die or kill someone

The MK twitch streamer au: ‘chat stop spamming bald whenever I take my beanie off I swear to god’, does streams with Scary Girl sometimes and regrets it instantly

Zombie Apocalypse AU: I just wanna see Axel thrive in an environment she’s prepared herself for, the angst, the girlbossery, the yuritastic character of all time

Actor AU: This ones just funny to think about because Raj and Wayne would just star in every single movie about ice hockey

Spy AU: Competent spy Axel having to take newbie Nichelle under her wing because Axelle fans deserve some more content

[anonymous-existences]

As per Tradition and also just the most common I can make on the spot:

Lily: Death.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

As the flower landed on where it would summon, the room's temperature dropped, a chill that made even wonder woman shiver, it's as though winter itself came to visit as green tinted ice slowly traced along the pillars of the walls and eventually reconnect to each other at the ceiling, at the center of the circle the flower burned a bright neon green.

"Oh Bloody Hell..." Constantine heaved under his breath and cursed even more inside his mind, completely regretting every life choices he'd made to lead up to this.

Bruce was frozen, both trying to process the current situation and also trying to plan out how to possibly stop this threat that might just emerge from this cultist circle.

The fire within the lily burned brighter and larger and as it slowly was replaced with thick chilling smog they saw bright neon eyes staring at them. What they didn't expect to see was a teenager in an all royal attire, He doesn't even look older than 16. His cape that replicate the Aurora borealis and his flaming crown that reflects the 'galaxies'. He had bluish darker/paler skin with freckles that resembles constellations on the starry sky. Yet there's concerning scars that populate his body, a Lichtenberg scar tracing from right side face to his neck and to possibly his chest or back as to what they can see. The teenager(?) Infront of them looked puzzled, confused but there was a hint of annoyance in his eyes as he looked around.

"Oh come on... Not again. I thought I stopped it this time. What kind of technique did you use no—" He paused and stared at Constantine.

"How i wish I could kill myself right at this moment, Next time you deal with cultists shit just call Zatanna. Not me. Not anymore. I can't believe I even still help you Batsy." John Huffed(?) nervously as he tried to avert his gaze away from the Teenager's(Bat isn't sure if he's actually a teenager or not?) Glare.

"Sad Trenchcoat man, John Constantine, why in the fuckery Fuck have you called me today? And why you of all people?" The being scoffed with a hint of annoyance.

".... Hnn.." Batman Grunted and Scowled at John, "Okay Big Bat but I didn't know it would summon HIM of all people and yes i do know him, he does know me, practically he'll own me after I die anyways but that's not the point right now, the point is that is the mother fuckin ghost King and I AM NOT dealing with this anymore." He raises his hands, totally done with everything and everyone.

"Yeah, Yeah, Ghost King, whatever." The teenager laughed sarcastically and motioned his hand, the Ice and frost among the surroundings slowly settled back to him as if he's absorbing the cold.

"Pardon my.... Truly unacceptable Entrance. Name's Phantom..." He smiled an almost too wide grin, sharp canines with his smug smile felt too terrifying. "And no. I don't intend to be a threat or want to be a threat. Now Care to tell me why and how the fuck I was summoned in this... Creepy place?? And I should really get back to my sister after this before she freaks out and start spam calling that Dan..." He looks around and then back at them all keeping that awful wide grin in place.

"I hate this job." Constantine sighed under his breath.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

My hands hurt from writing this on the spot- *sob*

God Summoning 101- DCxDP Prompt

"Don't. Touch. Anything." Constantine said firmly looking at the alter.

Recently there had been activity of dark magic users had been reported in this cave system and as expected it was full of cultists. They had discovered the writings of an ancient god or demon and started worshipping it. They had intended to summon it when the Justice League got involved after people started going missing. Currently, the captives who are thankfully all alive are being evacuated from the underground.

Constantine was here to study the alter and find the true name of the creature that the cultists call the "Infinite God."

"Looks deceptively simple. You place an offering and the guy shows up to fulfill your wish." Constantine said reading the sigils "That is if they want to."

"Its can't be that simple. There has to be a catch." Batman said coming back inside after helping the captives into the hands of the officers.

"The only catch I can see is that the god cares a lot about what the offering is and the person giving it. They seem to not respond to just anyone. My concern are the epithets." Constantine said deep in thought.

"The what?" Superman asked glancing over Constantine's shoulder.

"The title. Every god has many. Its specifies what vertion of the god you are appealing to. Even Aphrodite had a warrior counterpart. You must specify whether you are asking Apollo for inspiration, light or health." Wonder Woman chided.

"Yes, same goes here. Getting the right version of this god seems to depend on the offering. But these stupid fucks had no idea what to put on the altar. That's why they tried kidnapping people." Constantine sighed looking around the room.

The cave was decked out in hundreds of different offerings to appeal to the god and but so far the deity hadn't responded. He listed the items and the versions they probably wanted to see.

Next to the altar was a vase of flowers and herbs. Each one was different with different meanings.

Amaranth- Immortality

Anemone- Sickness

Lily-Death

Cowslip- Mischief

Hydrangeas-Wealth

Narcissus-Beauty

Rose-Love

Red poppy- War

There were others but most of these flowers were stuff Constantine had learned from trivia or reading about them in passing.

He didn't get to study anymore because-

"Guys all the capti-" Flash ran in and the wind caused the vase to topple over and a single flower to land on the alter.

The room began to shake as a portal opened.

(You go from here. Chose whatever flower landed.)

[reddogf13]

Outlast 2: Deliverance CH 3

Also on A03

Status: Incomplete

Rated: M - Dead Dove Do Not Eat This takes place in the Outlast 2 universe after all.

Previous chap: CH 2: Purgatory

Next chap: CH 4: Eucharist

___________________

~Ch:3 Atonement~

When he heard Val had survived the massacre in the mines. His stomach dropped, filled by a phantom lead, then readied to vomit. Heart stilled by the memory's of facing her that now could repeat in the future. She can't be alive. Refusing to believe it, Blake furrowed his brows. “How do you know?”

“He came hours after Knoth's death to mock us all. Laughing beyond Templegates edge.” Marta sneered while repeating Val's words. “ “Our God didn't fuck the earth, but your Father fucked you all!”.”

Blake considered what to ask after Marta turned angrier around the topic. He choked down his ill stomach for the next question. “Why hasn't she tried to take over?”

“Knoth's gone, but I'm still here. He knows not to test me.”

“Ah... Yeah.” Relieved at hearing Val wouldn't be coming to visit. Yet, how long would that last? Marta kept her back for now, but was it because Val didn't know of her injury yet? “... So, how'd they escape? Broke themselves free?”

“No, someone let them free when the fires broke. I don't know who, but I do know it must be someone around here. I didn't see anyone who wasn't suppose’ to be in Temple Gate that night. Only those free after the deed was done and I was too occupied by the fires to hunt them.”

“Great.” He breathed. So Val might know of Marta's injuries by now. Maybe she's injured too and only biding her time to take a crack at Temple Gate. He looked around at the ramshackle town. Already brought down so low when Knoth was around. Would it stand a chance if Val swarmed over it with a group of heretics? I guess it's not my problem. Tossing the thought aside. If only it didn't return shortly to nag him. Silenced fully when his stomach painfully growled. Remembering what he even came down for. Walking onward toward the great hall he first challenged Knoth at. Hoping that some scrap of food was inside when he arrived. Following behind him was Marta with a group lagging slightly behind to give her space.

Passing by the burnt church along the way. The group stopped to look down at the rotten body of Knoth. Shooting glares while one boldly spat on the corpse before they caught up to Blake. Regretting their choice when faced by Marta's ire. “What ungrateful-”

“Marta!” Blake's voice warned her back. She shot him an agitated look with clenching fists. Untensing on a few bible verses spoken. Others gave her a wide birth the entire time she chained out verses. Blake entered the grand hall through the front doors this time. Tall windows off to the left with an open ceiling showing large rafters. Passing by the long rows of dining tables with the higher stage at the back. A pair of double doors off to the right side grabbed Blake's attention. Walking around a large L shaped bar top he Opened them and found the large community kitchen. Noticing its age based on some appliances he was sure of being from the 70s or 80s. The fridges being more “modern” than the black iron stoves. Made to hold wood for cooking with similar black metal vents going into the ceiling. Whole place having not been used for a while based on the dust over everything. He assumed people didn't eat together, but in the privacy of their homes. Would be weird eating together with people who tried to kill you earlier. Turning back to the people still following. “Stay here. Sit down.” Lightly gesturing to the room. He didn't want them all trying to crowd in after him. The kitchen cramped enough with only a small walkway around the place.

He opened a few cabinets that only contained dishes. Moving to others full of various kitchen supplies like dish soap. Checking a small door he found what he was looking for, a pantry filled with canned foods. Grabbing a can of spam he winced a little at its best by date 15 years past. Reading similar expiration dates on every other can in there. Guess I'll be able to tell when I open it? Concerned that it would be rotten and tainted by a metallic flavor. Using a butter knife he popped open the lid. Inspecting the meat that had stayed fresh from what he could see. No strange smell or slime, although the flavor was lost to time. Tasting of nothing as he ate it plainly gripped in hand like a bread loaf. Working his way through the meal he took in the room to pass the time. Locking onto one of Knoth's paintings of himself with a golden disk mimicking other holy prophet paintings. Losing his appetite in the room, Blake removed himself to head outside. Not wanting to even be in a building with one of Knoth's depictions, he rather stand out by Marta. She stood outside staring off toward the burnt church with growing annoyance. Murmuring more bible verses or strips of Knoth's gospel. He looked and saw a group gathered by the building causing his curiosity to grow. Heading over there he finished the bland spam to investigate the commotion.

The freed gathered around Knoth's corpse to prod at it. Confirming to themselves personally that Knoth was indeed dead. Blake grimaced at the corpse laying out in the open. Hating to see his face even more now than when he was alive. Couldn't this town be rid of him already? Even In death he still lingers to torment people with his presence. Blake decided to do something about him. Shooing away some to clear the body he took the pick in his hands. Slamming it under the body to lean back in hooking it on. Wincing at the smell releasing from the bloated corpse. Others stepped back with a cover of their noses. A disgusting thick old blood mixed slime stretched from it to the dirt. Leaving a slick trail behind as Blake dragged him away from everything toward a ditch in the distance. Tossing him in finishing the first step he had lined up. Walking back to the grand hall he searched the cabinets for a small box full of matches. With that in hand he grabbed the painting of Knoth. Gathering similar depictions off the hall walls or framed on desks. Gospel papers crumpled in his grip to join the collected kindling. A pile forming over Knoth of all his monuments across Temple Gate. Many joined in, not only slaves, to toss their saved gospels. Paintings, photos, personal letters to written down commands. It grew further as everyone hunted down the false idols to add. Marta showed her clear displeasure for what Blake was doing. Her mumbling of verses turned louder toward a normal speaking tone. Words traveling down the halls out the grand buildings doors she had hid inside. Blake, having heard her, followed the trailing verses back to her praying under a large chandelier in the middle of an empty meeting room.

He approached her side with still many items held under an arm. “You okay?” His voice calm when asking.

She stopped her uttering of verses to coldly look down upon him. “You took him from our holy town and now you wish to kill his memory. How much more will you take, Angel? When our faith is dead will you be satisfied? Or when our souls are reaped like his? They know not what they're doing. Betraying our Lord by turning away our prophets teachings. His gospel should be treasured for what it gave us. Are you happy about the ruin you bring us?”

“You're one to talk.” He huffed. “How many did Knoth have you kill? You blame me, but I didn't kill Knoth either really. What's going to make you happy? If Knoth returned right now and demanded you to kill, other than me, would you be happy then? Could you look down on those families who just reunited and say they deserve to die?” Marta's piercing stare faltered against his words. “You want to save Knoth's teachings so bad? Then take it.” Holding out the dreaded pick to her. “Kill for him again.”

She flinched away from its form held toward her. Face losing what little color it had. Side eyeing the weapon she once wield as a righteous deliverer of justice. Now treated as a cursed object to be rejected at all cost. Shrinking back under its damning shadow falling over her.

“Knoth's last command was to kill me. Will you? He knows you didn't like killing. Why couldn't he have done it himself? Because of his religious restrictions that he forced you to break? For everyone to break all these years. What did his gospel do for you, Marta? … Will you save it?” Arm tiring from the pick he set its end on the ground. Its weighted thud into the floor boards echoed around them. Sounding close to a gavel sending its judgment down on the guilty.

She hesitated to face him and the blade, her breath stolen in the moment. When it was regained she answered a shaken. “No.” Stepping back to leave deeper into the darkened half of the building. Acting as if being offered such a chance had directly struck down her soul. Requiring urgent healing care as far as possible from the black picks toxic presence.

He sighed at her retreat into the dark. I'll check on her later. Returning to the ditch now completely filled by all sorts of junk that merely mentioned Knoth's name. Tossing in his arm full, he waited for any more stragglers to toss the last. Head facing one side down to the other of those gathered behind him. “Got all that we could?” The crowd agreed along with head nodding. “Alright.” Blake spoke with the strike of a match. Urged to say something while scowling down at all the imagery burying the one they depicted. “For what you've done. … An eternity in hell isn't enough.”

A burning match tossed down into the papers. It spread a fire from the inside out of the pile. When Blake walked off right after, so did everyone else. No one wanted to mourn that monster burning deep down in a pit. Along the way he saw so many other dead rotting out under the baking sun. Their smell caused Blake's eyes to water after almost gagging on it. “Fuck.” Lightly cursing his tugging heart to do something. He thought to burn them, it was the quickest way. Yet he didn't want to get rid of them the same way he did to Knoth. With how many there were, he would need a lot of help. Turning to the people he asked them to. “Fetch some shovels. We're making graves.” Thankful that they did what was asked. Many hours later a long mass grave had been made. Far too many body's to space out for proper single graves. Buried and covered by various stones that many scratched names into. Blake placed three of his own. One for Lynn and the other two for Ethan and his daughter. A depressing number of people killed over many years by Knoth now put to rest. Trees free of strung up bodies. Suicide victims taken out of homes. Freed of cages they weren't freed from in life. Untangled from barbed wire stringing them up on poles for scarecrows. The streets were far more empty, now that so much death was cleared.

Blake feared the next, and most deserving, to be put to rest. Entering the building whose floor was made up of burnt children. He quietly apologized to the small room. Knowing he walked across them to reach Lynn. This would require ginger care to move them all. Their body's burned together were carefully separated to be wrapped in white cloth. Bodies of others were already in wooden boxes lined up inside. Ready to be buried, but never were until now. Walked to a grave set under a large lone oak tree in an open field. Placed with them were flowers or toys the townspeople gathered. When it was done and filled in, it too was covered by various rocks with carved names. This funeral lasted longer than the others. Blake stood by respectfully until the last person left at sundown.

Passing by the people in town he saw in their eyes a presence of awe toward him, but also fear. After his interaction with Marta he studied the pick axe in his hands. He wasn't superstitious and was sure it wasn't cursed. He did see however, that it had a burden tied to it. Weighing down on Marta with each new kill under its blade. Its burden now tying itself to him in intimidating those around him. Same as all those gospel papers, he knew, this too had to go. Could he really say anyone was free while they were terrified of being killed? Either by him or if by chance Marta took it back. It would put him at risk to not have a weapon, but then what was the point? He keeps it and people stay obedient because they're scared of him, exactly as Knoth kept things. Sickened by that he almost abandoned it right then and there. Holding off on that, it needed a grander send off then being dropped in the dirt. If it were only so easy for everyone else. Take their burdens and toss it far away to make themselves free. Marinating on the thought he figured out a way they could. Returning to the patio of the grand hall he took a deep breath.

Shouting toward the first stars appearing, hoping all would hear him. “Tomorrow, grab an object. One that has meaning to you, but one you will not miss. Meet me here tomorrow.” Stepping inside to pass the few freed without homes.

He was stopped by one. “What if we have nothing?”

“A rock will do.” Picking something common that anyone could take. He headed through the back doors dead tired and beyond sore from digging those deep graves. Opening doors one by one to check their insides. Some offices, a cleaning closet then he found a storage space in the middle. Having a line up of basic cots, surrounded by storage shelving, he was thrilled to see the bedding unused by anyone. Judging off them being covered in a thick layer of dust that poofed off in a choking cloud. Before laying in bed he went to the door to lock it shut. Fearful at the thought someone would sneak in to strangle him to death. Soon as he laid down he was out until the following afternoon.

Slow to wake, but knowing he had something important planned he stretched. Popping multiple places along his spine when he hissed after his shoulder locked up. Still feeling that bruise marking his first day here, at least it was lighter than before. Sliding from the bed he looked down at the pick left on the floor. Tired again at the mere thought of picking it up again. I'll be glad when I'm rid of you. Hoisting it up into his hands. Unlocking the door he passed down the hall steps echoing along the whole way. Worrying that nobody heard him last night. That he'd need to go awkwardly knock on doors. Hope Temple Gates full of morning people. I don't want to get a knife to the head. When he passed through the end door a smile twitched onto his face. The huge room full of people sitting at the tables talking to one another. Quieting down soon as they saw him enter. Blake stepped over to the small podium set at mid stage.

“Thank you for coming.” Gazing across the crowd of faces he saw one in particular was absent. “Stay here, I'll be right back. When I do, we'll head out.” He left the podium to search around the grand hall first. Unable to find her he went around the empty town. How do I lose someone who's seven fucking feet tall? Running into a few stragglers along the way. “Have you seen Marta?”

“In her chapel?” They pointed off toward a certain direction.

“Thank you.” Rushing off toward the tall building he was certain was the one. Arriving he came to a stop at the large front door. Knocking on it to announce his presence he received no answer. Opening the door it creaked loudly to announce his presence all the more. Right away he saw the tall woman sitting in a chair. The sunlight pooling in from behind him providing the only bit of light inside. She was sitting completely in the dark, slumped forward, exhausted, wearing a long face after crying not too long ago. “Marta?” He spoke softly. “I need you to come to the lake. Just for a little while, please.”

She glanced over to him, wincing at the sight of the pick in his hands. “I can't let the sun touch me. The Lord would not like it to shine on me.”

His head tilted down, knowing he wasn't always the best at cheering others. “I think he would.” Giving it a try at least. “Especially today, it's very important you're there. I can help clear you of your sins.” He stood between the doorway, waiting. Unable to do this without her he'd stand there all day if he had to. Maybe the ceremony will happen at night then. Joking, but hoping that wouldn't be the case.

“Can you do that?”

“If I'm an angel, I can.” doing his best to give a reassuring smile. Judging from Marta's poker face he wasn't sure if it worked at first. Without a word, she stood to do what he asked of her. He saw the pain inside written all over her face and in how she acted. Keeping away from the object in his hands if it was motioned toward her. Lagging behind as he led the way back to the hall. Gathering the others onward to the lake in a large assembly.

“Gather along.” Gesturing down along the rocky shore. Questioning himself on if this was the best place or maybe a cliff. Least a cliff wouldn't smell like rotten fish, but too late now. Patiently he waited for the others to shuffle into place. Many fidgeted with small objects in their hands. Most appearing out of the chosen objects he saw were crosses. Golden sun beamed down on them from the clear blue sky. Lake looking far nicer than it was the last time he saw it. Not a dead fish in sight despite the lingering smell of them. Birds tweeting from far off tree lines on the other shore. “Marta.” He called forward from the crowd. Tapping a spot in front of him for her to stand. She didn't have an object, but she also didn't need one since Blake brought one for her. He stretched out the weapon in front of him, laid across his opened palms. “Take it.” Set out in offering it to Marta, who again flinched away from it. By the looks on peoples faces he could tell his request scared the crowd. Speaking softly to break their moment of nerves he repeated. “Take it. When you do, toss it as far as you can into the lake. When you toss it, it will take all your sins with it.”

Marta looked between him and the pick. Bringing her hands under it she twitched away at first like tapping hot iron. As he lowered it fully into her grasp she wasn't prepared for its weight, shifting herself to keep it hoisted up. He smiled at her then stood back to give her room. She looked down sorrowfully at it, then closed her eyes for a deep breath. Opening them again she leaned the offending weapon back till it tapped the shore to launch it swirling over the water. Appearance like a black disk before it slammed into the surface creating a huge splash. Sinking deeply into the lake's darkness never to be found again.

“Nice throw.” Complimenting her with a wave of the next person to come forward. Repeating the line he said before to them. “Throw it and let your sins go with it.” A line of people forming to toss all their selected items. People weighed down by their guilt uplifted when they committed their toss. Smiling between one another on the enlarging side throughout the ceremony. Watching the event go on, Blake dipped back into his thoughts. What will you do now? Nagging him that he had to keep this whole thing rolling. Everything's clean. People are happy for the most part. Stomach growling to nag him next about neglecting to eat since yesterday morning. Open another spam when I get back. Mm, can't live on that forever around here. First the spam then the rest will go. Does this place have any farms? There were corn fields, but I don't remember much on them. The livestock rotting won't be any good by now. Fuck, what do we have to work with? Maybe farming shouldn't be first. Turning his head toward the forest surrounding them. Some deer have to be out there or berry bushes. Make some traps for rabbits. Could we fish? Scanning the water. No chance. I don't know what happened to the water before with all the dead fish. Metal poisoning or a toxic algae bloom could be happening. Thinking back on the time him and Lynn reported a case of that on an ocean coast line. Warning people not to eat anything they caught for the next few weeks. Dead things from birds to big seals were washing up dead. He didn't know if it'd wash away in a lake like it would in open ocean. If I start to see fish that would be the first sign it's getting better at least. Still I wont take a sip until it's tested for metal… Were people drinking from this? Were they using the water for farms? Crap, didn't think about that. Cant farm without a major water source for it all. Okay, let's keep all this simple. Hunting and gathering. Figure out the rest later… Wait, does this make me the mayor now? Can I run a town? Can I run this town? Thoughts running off on their own throughout the ceremony.

Sun lowering from its tall noon stature by the time the ceremony was complete. People smiling while they talked to one another. Marta kept a blank face while she leaned against a leafless tree under the sun. Her changes a lot more subtle than everyone else's. Breathing easier under the sun she hid from earlier. Blake didn't want to interrupt the truly happy moment these people had, but he needed to find out more. Specifically if there were any farmers left to work.

Approaching the group he cleared his throat to catch their attention. “Any of you farmers?” The townspeople looked between all of them. Shaking their heads when he looked to a few. His heart sank the longer there was no positive answer. Giving up he turned to teaching how to farm himself as the go to. Saved from that when one older man stepped forward through the parting crowd.

“I am.” He was mid 60s, partly balding with darker hair. A big scar crossed diagonally over his face to split a part of his lip and one eyebrow. “Most of us who worked the fields ain't around no more. It's just me now.”

“Can you teach others how?”

“Sure.”

“Good, what's your name?”

“James, sir.”

“Do you know the fields around here?”

“Yeah, but ain't much. About all our fields are dirt. Knoth told us not to bother replanting since… Well.” Shifting his shoulders. “Only corn stalks that have been picked clean by now. The bad ones were left behind.”

“Can you start planting again?”

“Naw, not a speck of seeds or grain in our barn. I can grab what's left of those inedible cobs for corn seeds. But that next harvest can't be planted 'till April at the soonest.”

Damn, that's months away. Octobers only halfway now. “Okay, start collecting as much as you can along with whatever else you can find. Take as many people as you need to help you out.” Worried about the water supply he added. “Don't plant anything yet though.” Sending the farmer off who took along five people with him. Blake faced back to the crowd. “Any of you hunters?” Happy to get a faster response.

A slightly younger man around 40s with dark hair. Face covered in many small scars that parted what short dark stubble was on his face. “My names John, sir. I used to go out on regular hunting trips.”

“Perfect. I think we're going to need you a lot right now. Any more work with you? Can you train others?”

“A few of us. My son and a couple men. I can train more starting on basic traps.”

“Great, know how to forage too?”

“Yes sir, now's the best time for berry's before they go away.”

“Okay, same as I told James. Collect as much as you can and take as many people as you need. I want to save canned food as much as possible. Come back with what you've gotten at the end of the day.” Announcing to the crowd. “Only eat canned if there's not enough fresh food to go around.”

“Umm.” John nervously said before quieting.

“Yes?” He asked carefully to not scare John quiet. Knoth I'm guessing didn't like to hear any “but's.” Have to make sure nothing slips by because of that.

“I don't have any equipment to hunt bigger things. I can set traps for rabbits and forage, but that's 'bout it.”

“That's fine. Catch or gather whatever you can. We're all starting from the bottom.”

“Yes sir.” John dipped his head before heading off collecting his mentioned three and twelve others.

Blake took in a deep breath of air. Foods being worked on. Time to start rebuilding.

[nympharmacy]

spoilers for young justice s4e13 below!!

SO WE NEED TO TALK.

(yes, i understand i'm spam posting. no, i don't regret it.)

i yoinked this screenshot from the episode without really thinking about it but there are a couple of things i think need attention

1. the phantom zone!! i haven't read enough of the comics to actually know what it looks like but i really like the design here. i just wanted to appreciate that really quickly.

2. his eyes. they look like m'ganns eyes, actually, fully with the dark sclera and orange iris. idk what it means, but i'm intrigued.

3. um? there are?? three slashes on his chest???? i can only assume they happened in the explosion, but he's still bleeding even as a ghost and i just. what. concern.

4. i don't think i've ever seen that much emotion on his face. like goddamn, it's so easy to see that he's desperate and in pain. idk what to think or feel at this point. i've gone feral.

[artekai]

I recently picked Mystic Messenger back up, and combined with my P5R brainrot, it gave me a crack crossover idea that just won’t leave me alone:

AU where Rika and V are Takuto’s parents.

Okay, hear me out for a second.

(Bear in mind that it’s been a year since I last played Mystic Messenger and I haven’t seen all the endings yet -- I haven’t played Rika’s Before Story or V’s After -- so this might not make any sense in canon and the characterization might be all over the place. Then again, it’s a crack AU, so…)

Major spoilers for both Mystic Messenger and Persona 5 Royal under the read more!

The beginning is fairly obvious. Rika and V are an inseparable couple, they get engaged, she gets pregnant. But then The Mint Eye thing happens.

Rika considers getting rid of the baby just because it’s V’s, but deep down she still has feelings for him. Plus, having a baby in the cult is like getting a new believer but without all the purifying process, right? So she keeps the child.

Rika treats Takuto similarly to how she treats MC: she’s strangely kind to him, she mostly keeps him away from the other believers, and she doesn’t force him to take the elixir or anything. She already sees Takuto as being purified, because he’s just a toddler, so no need for all those painful rituals; she just needs to raise him the way she wants. Of course, since he’s the savior’s son, all of the believers think he’s like Baby Jesus, so no one bothers him.

You know what happens then. Canon happens. I’m not sure what route and what ending would fit this, but it needs to be a route where they go to Mint Eye and save Saeran. Maybe V’s Normal Ending? I don’t know, I can’t remember if Saeran survives in that ending. Well, let’s assume he does because I need that for my sanity.

And if he doesn’t, then I don’t care tHIS IS A FIX-IT AU.

please let me have this.

So, anyways, they infiltrate Mint Eye, they save Saeran, and they find Takuto. Given that V has been infiltrating the Mint Eye for a while, he already knows about him, and by now he has figured out that that must be his child. Either way, they get him away from the cult before any “cleansing” can take place, and V and MC commit to taking care of him.

Takuto starts off as a very anxious kid, which is normal considering that a bunch of strangers suddenly took him away from his mother and everything he has ever known. He mainly sticks with Saeran (which isn’t good for either of them), but, over time, MC gets him to open up to her and V and, eventually, to the rest of the RFA. Of course, Rika already drilled her ideas of “true paradise” and “eternal happiness” into him, so V and MC take it upon themselves to decondition him and reeducate him. Their efforts pay off, as Takuto eventually manages to adjust to normal society fairly well, but you know that those cultish ideas will still linger in the back of his mind, even if he doesn’t realize it.

Though his memories of Mint Eye completely fade away with age, Takuto inherits V’s gentleness and self-sacrificial tendencies and Rika’s madness and obsession with eradicating pain. When he’s mature enough, he also learns about what happened around that time (but maybe he doesn’t have all the details), because V and MC are determined to not keep any more harmful secrets like they used to.

Anyways, growing up with the RFA fuels Takuto’s natural passion for helping people. Yoosung introduces him to cooking, Jaehee teaches him her work ethic, Saeyoung transfers him his love of cats and animals in general (which is why, in Takuto’s words, “they don’t seem to share the sentiment”), and Zen constantly reminds him to never give up his dreams, no matter how crazy they might seem. He tells him about how he ran away from home to pursue his dream career and has never regretted it since, which Takuto takes very seriously.

As for Jumin, Takuto thinks that he’s too cold-hearted, but he looks up to him for his managerial talent and admires the bond that he shares with his father. When V and MC are away from home, Jumin offers to babysit Takuto for them, so he gets many exclusive tours of C&R, where he starts dreaming of growing up to work on a project much larger than himself with experts in the field (read: leading a team of researchers and having his very own lab).

Takuto also sees that Saeyoung and Saeran are getting along well and slowly overcoming their trauma together, so he comes to believe that everyone can change for the better, and thus, that everyone deserves a second chance, regardless of the mistakes they’ve made in the past. This will come into play at least two times: First, in his reality, when he lets Akechi and most of the Palace Owners roam free; and, second, when he decides to turn his own life around after the change of heart.

Anyways, Takuto meets Rumi, begins dating her, graduates high school, goes to college, and gets engaged after a few years.

V has always felt uneasy about Takuto dating. He knows that Takuto is too nice for his own good, so a part of him is afraid that he’ll end up in an obsessive relationship like the one he had with Rika. But, when Takuto introduces Rumi to his family, he and MC can tell that she’s supportive, well-adjusted, and considerate of Takuto’s feelings, so they are happy for both of them.

And then the burglary thing happens.

Takuto closes himself off from friends and family, overcome with grief and guilt. He still keeps in contact with the RFA, but it’s only because he knows that they will only get more worried if he stops talking to them altogether. Everyone at RFA is concerned, but V especially so, because he understands the pain of losing your fiancée and blaming yourself for not being able to do something to help her, and he doesn’t want Takuto to deal with it on his own.

After Takuto rewrites Rumi’s memories, he tells the RFA the same thing he tells everyone: he and Rumi broke up and it was his fault. This isn’t the RFA’s first rodeo, so most of them can tell that he’s hiding something, but they’ve known him for a long time, they know he’s a good person, and they basically raised him, so they decide to trust him (for the most part).

Takuto isolates himself more and more, acting like he’s fine to avoid being a burden, convinced that he must solve his problems by himself, like his father does. V and MC can see where this is going, and the former keeps spamming the messenger, practically begging Takuto to give him a call and talk to him, or at least get some therapy. But Takuto insists that he’s okay, that he doesn’t want them to worry about him, and that he just hasn’t contacted them much because he’s busy with work.

V starts blaming himself for being unable to reach out to his son, but, when he realizes that Takuto got his self-blaming habit from him, and only blames himself further.

As for the other RFA members, Jumin thinks that Takuto needs time to grieve and that, if he doesn’t want to accept their help, there’s nothing they can do about it. Jaehee is disheartened but she reluctantly agrees, hoping that Takuto will go back to normal soon. Zen thinks that they should be doing more for him, and that, if they put enough effort into it, he will come around.

Yoosung might revert back to his old ways and question V on why he isn’t doing enough to help his own son. Seeing as Takuto is his cousin and everything he has left of Rika, I’m sure he's very protective of him...

Once they all get worried enough, Saeyoung tracks down Takuto with his hacking skills, but he doesn’t find anything suspicious, so they decide to respect his privacy. After all, V doesn’t want to get too obsessive and repeat the mistakes he made with Rika, so he decides to listen to Jumin’s advice and give Takuto some space, hoping he’s making the right choice.

Meanwhile, Takuto figures out that Shido is behind the conspiracy that took away his research, which only strengthens his resolve to keep everything a secret from the RFA. Shido is too similar to the Choi twins’ father, and Takuto is afraid that, if Saeyoung hears about this, he won’t let it go, which could bring back some awful memories from his childhood and the Mint Eye thing… Especially considering that Akechi is in a similar position to Saeran, except that, you know, at least his mother wasn’t deliberately cruel to him.

A lot of the sympathy that Takuto feels towards Akechi comes from his experience with the Choi twins. He can deduce that he’s being manipulated by Shido like how Saeran was manipulated by Rika, so he wants to save him just like how V saved the twins. That also applies to the Yoshizawa twins, since the two of them promised to always be together in pursuit of their dream, but Sumire was the “weaker” of the two and was secretly envious of Kasumi. All in all, the similarities are everywhere, which might, consciously or subconsciously, affect the way Takuto interacts with the PTs.

In any case, Takuto just wants to protect the PTs from the same kind of trauma that the RFA went through. But -- he isn’t like Rika, or so he tells himself. He’s convinced that his methods are right because they can save everyone without causing any more suffering. He’s pretty sure he’s sane (he’s not). Besides, Rika’s dream was originally pretty noble, so it should be fine as long as he doesn’t start drugging people, right?

(He will retraumatize them, hold them hostage, and brainwash them, though, because he doesn’t see it as such)

The third semester comes along. I’m sure you also know what happens here. Takuto gets a god complex, the PTs fight him, defeat him, steal his treasure, and they destroy his perfect reality.

After the change of heart, Takuto is crushed, so he goes back to V and MC and confesses the whole truth through tears. He profusely apologizes, fully aware of how he retraumatized all of the Phantom Thieves to guide them to ‘salvation’, not unlike what Rika did to the members of Mint Eye, and he takes responsibility, knowing that he should’ve asked for help much sooner.

V and MC are shocked and heartbroken, faced with the fact that their son suffered so much that he fell into insanity and no one even noticed. They feel as if, with all the trauma that the RFA has already gone through, they should’ve seen the warning signs, and they should’ve tried harder to help Takuto heal… but they know from experience there’s no guarantee that that would’ve solved anything, so it’s pointless to dwell in what-ifs.

V and MC listen to Takuto’s explanation. They don’t understand any of the cognitive psience stuff and they are sure that he’s delusional because of the whole reality thing, but they comfort him to the best of their abilities. MC tells Takuto that he’s not like Rika and that he can always make up for his past mistakes, while V assures him that it wasn’t his fault and that, if someone like V could get back on his feet after everything that happened with the Mint Eye, Takuto can do it too.

Takuto takes their advice to heart, choosing to leave counseling, seek therapy, and make amends with his former patients. The RFA supports him while he gets his life together (but Jumin didn’t teach him how to drive, of course… oh god please tell me Jumin didn’t teach him how to drive), and he begins (continues?) to volunteer for the association’s charity events, so that he can keep helping people in need. That’s around the time when the P5R ending happens.

And… yep. That’s pretty much it.

Bonus points if Takuto ends up introducing the RFA to the PTs and they all become a big, happy found family. Jaehee and Akiren can bond over coffee making, Yoosung and Ryuji can bond over games, Zen and Ann can bond over acting and modelling, Jumin and Makoto can bond over being robots, V and Yusuke can bond over art, Saeyoung and Futaba can bond over memes and hacking, Ray and Haru can bond over flowers, and Saeran and Akechi can bond over their hatred of their fathers, haha.

Anyways, this crack AU became way more serious and more wholesome than originally intended... Now I actually want this to be a thing, haha.

[runathepianist]

A Quick Checklist on Self Exploration

Hello everyone! Today I’m going to write down some of a quick checklist of my own self exploration based on question provided by ELE on this twitter link! (https://twitter.com/xlittle_ele/status/1275847156629475328) 

I will write things here in order not to spam your Twitter Timeline too much.

1. First of all, introduce yourself! What’s your name? My name is Runa. People usually call me by that name, but some others call me Ruru, Na-chan, some call me by the name of Xiao Wei and some other more.

2. Where are you from? From this universe; specifically, my mother’s womb. 

3. Do you have any hobbies? If so, which one? I have plenty of things that I could call as my hobbies.  I do music, specifically piano, but lately I’m trying out some other instrument as well, like kalimba/ ukulele. I like to write stories/ letters to friends/ daily journal, I like to re-arranged my room when I got the mood and time to do it, I love to watch some movies/ series and read stories/ manga as well. 

4. If you could travel anywhere in the world, where will you go? Hhm...Lemme see...I think I would love to go to Tasmania.  I personally loves to go to those minor places that people are not really put an eye to. Rather than going to those mainstream places. Partially, I want to go to Tasmania ever since I watch a Singapore drama series [Sudden] and part of the scenery in that series was taken at Tasmania. It makes me want to go there and visit the real place someday.

5. Do you believe in love at the first sight? Hmm...Not really, actually. Maybe because I’m a person who usually fall in love after I have interacted with the person for quite some time. Maybe because I rarely deeply attracted with how someone’s physical looks, but more into the personality they have within them.

6. What’s your favourite song at the moment? If you don’t have one, what’s the last song you listened to? I’m listening to quite a lot of Hiroyuki Sawano’s composed OST songs these days lately and also currently re-listen to Rachmaninoff piano concerto in C minor. 

7. What’s your favourite food? A lot (?) But mostly I love those salty food rather than sweet stuffs.  

8. What’s the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning? It is either I’m trying to remember about the dream I dream of last night, or I feel grateful that I’m still be able to stay alive today. Sometimes, I could think of some random stuffs that suddenly struck me when I’m awake in the morning.

9. Do you believe in soulmates? Not really, but I believe that people are attracting people with the same/ similar frequencies with them, so if I want to see how my future soulmates is, I just need to mirror on myself and see how I’m living my life so far and how’s my true personality is. 

10. What do you want to become in the future? A wonderful lady artist (musician) for myself, wife for my husband and an awesome mother of two or three. 

11. What’s your favorite book? Kate DiCamillo’s The miraculous journey of Edward Tulane All poetry books by Lang Leav Le petite prince - Antoine de Saint-Exupery Steal like an artist  - Austin Kleon 

12. Favorite Season? Hmm...Spring time?

13. What’s the best memory you have with your friends? Hmm..Actually I couldn’t really recall any. Maybe there was, but I’m a forgetful person, really. 

14. What’s your biggest dream? To have a peaceful and healthy (both physically and mentally) life with my beloved family and dearest people. 15. If you could change one thing about yourself, what it’ll be? I wonder...Maybe my cowardness? 

16. What’s your favorite movie? Hmm...There are a lot too, but lemme spell out some that I could still remember the title. It’s kinda hard to name, since I’m usually more into series than movie. The Devil wears prada, Up in the air, Habibie & Ainun, Yes Man, How to train your dragon 1 & 2,  Finding Mr. Right.

17. Do you have a crush on someone? Hmm...I currently have a fiance. Does this count as one?

18. If you knew you were gonna die tomorrow, what will you do? Write a letter and prepare parting gift for everyone. Have a good talk and convey everything that I would love to tell to my beloved dearest people surround me. 

19. Do you feel proud of yourself? Yes I do

20. What do you think is your safe place? Y’know, that place/ thing that helps you feel better when you need it the most? Bathroom, because it gives you privacy though you are surrounded by people. I mean, it’s rare to see other people following you into bathroom right? So the sense of personal space is there in the bathroom. At least, for me personally. 

21. Do you believe in ghosts? I believe it exist in terms of frequencies. This universe is filled by various frequencies and they are unseen, but you could sometimes feel it. That’s how I define feelings, and ghosts. 

22. Do you miss someone? I miss myself, sometimes, and some people that have passed away, sometimes.

23. Do you have any pets? What are their names? I used to have hedgehogs, but I don’t have any with me now after their death.

24. Are you a night person or a morning one? I could say I’m a night owl. Morning doesn’t really work well for me. 

25. Are you part of the LGBT community? Nope, but I’m okay with being friend with people who are part of the LGBT community.

26. What’s your favorite video game? Hmm...Those old games, like Fatal Frame series, La pucelle, phantom brave, disgaea, some otome games like amnesia series/ hakuoki. 

27. What’s the reason you wake up every morning? Life goes on, so yeah.

28. Do you look up to someone? Hmm...it’s a yes and a no. 

29. What’s something you’ve wanted to try for a while, but haven’t done it yet? Go somewhere far away, enjoy tranquility and the nature, alone. 

30. What’s the meaning of life for you? It’s an endless journey of finding oneself and spreading positivity and love to people surround us. 

31. Do you play any instruments?  I play mostly piano and those instruments within the same family like keyboard, electone, pianika, etc. Side: I tried ukulele, kalimba, recorder, etc.

32. What’s the most annoying thing you had to deal with? The battle within myself,  How to deal with the society surrounds me. 

33. How would you define “art”? Wabisabi - the beauty in imperfection.

34. Do you think you’re a different person now because of quarantine and everything that happened in the world? Not really, but I do find out how lazy I actually am after this quarantine.  How I am really a jak-of-all-trades; well, it just some self-exploration,  but to say that I’m a different person now? Nah, no! I’m still me. 

35. Name one thing you hate that others love? Those material related stuffs.

36. What do you think that happens after we die? My soul with emerge with this universe and my physical body will blend into one to the soil. I will become frequencies and when the right moment comes, I will be born again in this universe in a different form.

37. Do you have any regrets? I do, but I don’t want to dwell into things in the past too much as there is no way we could change the past, but I’m striving to change now to change the future instead.

38. Love or being loved? Being loved is awesome. 

39. What’s the best advice someone has ever given to you? Marriage is not about love, because love won’t last for years,  but please keep enhancing yourself to be the best version of yourself and never forget to build consciousness within yourself. Based on that, you support each other, appreciate each other and trust each other as couple.  (Advice given by Nichiren Daishonin Buddha to his disciple, Shijo Kingo)

I really like this a lot when I stumble on this, and apparently it’s one of advice that I took dearly within my heart until now as a guidance.

40. What are you afraid of? When I make my family upset/ something bad happen to them

41. Describe yourself in 5 words Simplicated Jack of all trades

42. How’s your relationship with your parents/ siblings? Very good. We never really have any toxic relationship with each other though of course we are all not perfect and there are things that we should work on for each of us. 

43. Would you rather live in a big city or in a small town? Hmm...A small town that is able to travel to a big city for a travel distance less than an hour by train. I miss my time spent when I was in Diemen. It was a nice small city near Amsterdam. 

44. Have you ever been on a relationship? Yes

45. What’s the happiest memory that comes to your mind right now? I’m actually pretty sleepy and zombie mode right now, so I couldn’t think off any specific moment, but I think most of moments in my life is a bit bitter with lots of sweetness on it, so yeah! Those moments spent with my family are the best.

46. Do you easily trust others? Nope. I usually have minus trust with other people other than my own core family. Even I couldn’t trust my extended family too much. 

47. Have you ever dyed your hair? Nope, but I usually try some wigs instead. 

48. What’s the first thing you notice when you meet someone new? Of course, it’s physical appearance (though I should say I don’t put much attention on physical thing) since it’s the first thing that we could see with bare eyes.

49. If you could only listen to one album for the rest of your life, which one it’ll be?  I’ll just pick one from KOKIA album. I love her so much. Any album could do, but maybe I’ll choose the best collection album since it contains more songs there LMAO

50. Tag someone to remind them how much you love and care about them... Hmm..I will tag my sister perhaps XD The other family members of mine don’t have twitter.

51. What was your favourite toy when you were a kid? Dolls? I forgot. ahahaha. 

52. What’s your biggest pet peeve? When people in society only judge people based on material possession they have rather than by their hearts. It annoys me so much when I encounter one.

53. If you could change one thing in the world to make it a better place, what will you do? I don’t have any idea right now. Writer’s block.

54. Have you ever got involved with drugs/ alcohol? Nope. Never.

55. What do you think is your aesthetic? Hmm... All of me?

56. Do you enjoy traveling? Yes, but sometimes not really since traveling is tiring, but it’s good to see a different scenery once in a while. 

57. What’s your favorite show? Hmm...I don’t really have one maybe? Is anime consider as show? I don’t think so huh.

58. Are you into witchcraft? Nope.

59. What would be your ideal gift? Hmm...I never really have any specific desire in life, but usually I love letterset/ notebook/ fluffy stuffs/ tea/ coffee/ any aesthetic/ vintage stuffs around. I usually treasure more intangible things than tangible one, so yea. 

60. Do you think you’re a good person? It depends on how you define a good person is.

61. Are you more of an introvert or an extrovert? I’m introvert.

62. Have you ever gone to a concert? Yes, I did. Some classical concert and Kingdom Heart orchestra tour concert. 

63. How will your ideal first date be? When there is no drama occurs and compatibility is there, ah, with good food and tea as well.

64. Do you think there’s life in others planets? Mayhap. Why not? I’m open to any possibilities.

65. What do you do when you feel sad? I play/ listen to music, watch something, write something, take a good shower with favorite scented soap.

66. If you could travel back in time to another century, which one will you pick? Hmm....The year where I’m born. 

67. Do you often remember your dreams? Yes, I do!

68. Name one thing you hate about your country I don’t really have one.

69. If you won the lottery, what will you do with all the money? I’ll buy a house for myself (and my future family) and another one to build a public library/ an orphanage. 

70. Any guilty pleasure? Quite a lot, actually. 

[barbaranestor2]

I'm cosmo

My mask spoiled and snobbish My heart and soul almost dead I’m cosmo searching charlatans My muses marked my freedoms Eternal and cashed to not creep My groom poisoned and blamed Bullets shoot in the name of god Bomb rattles among past barons I spam nereids and medusa tears Just nothing can cure the nothing And I pierce regret on needle bed Fucked up courage of not desired Spartan phantoms bullied in exiles Alone and caught in poem dreams Orestes and Electra pietas siblings Some time some mag must defeat My incurable nervousness I’m sad But psychedelic groupies met god And specters in paradise basement

[teatreethot]

UNPOPULAR MUSICAL THEATRE OPINIONS (im so sorry)

Okay first of all, I am a theatre kid. I literally did Phantom Of The Opera cosplay when I was 3 because I didn’t want to make an animal mask with the paper plates. Also, this is MY opinion. So please don’t spam the comments calling me a fake fan. This fandom is already toxic as it is.

- I don’t like Starkid. I’ve watched every Starkid show and honestly none of them are funny or entertaining.

- Hamilton, DEH, Heathers, BMC, BOM, Falsettos and Six are all incredibly overrated. Lemme explain why:

- Hamilton is overrated because Jesus Christ. I’ve listened to Hamilton since they were off Broadway and can I just say, while it is an amazing piece of art and is somewhat educational (literally half of it is fanfiction) the fandom has taken it out of proportions and destroyed it. It’s just gotten so cringy because of people who like it a bit too much. 

- DEH and Heathers are both good musicals. They are not bad okay. I’m not saying that but I feel like they are a bit too overhyped. Especially DEH. ‘Treebros’ is necrophilia and we don’t have that stuff on this blog okay. Again, I’m not saying that I hate them, because the music is good, but there are better things.

- Side note: DEH should not have won Best Orchestrations at the Tonys because The Great Comet was by far superior.

- I hate Be More Chill. I can’t even explain why. The thought of it makes me cringe. I can’t look at the cover of the soundtrack without flinching. I’ve listened to the entire thing and I regret it. I will never like it.

- BOM, Falsettos and Six are all great musicals, but everyone just keeps talking about them. Like yes, I know about BOM, and yes I know that it’s funny and has good music, but it’s not better that Phantom Of The Opera? And Falsettos is good but it is so goddamn overhyped. It was NOT robbed at the Tonys, because ti had a very limited cast and no ensemble so it was pretty obvious that it was going to be lost between things like DEH, TGC and Hello Dolly!

- Side note: I don’t think Hello Dolly! should’ve won all of the things it did but I’ll get to that later.

- Six is good. But it is so annoying. It was great at the start but the only songs that people actually listen to are Don’t Lose Your Head and Don’t Lose Your Head. I’m so sick of it.

- Anyways, classics like Phantom and Les Mis and anything Lloyd Webber or Sondheim are far superior to modern day musicals because they encompass the true spirit of musical theatre.

- The 2017 Tonys.

- The 2017 goddamn Tonys.

- I’m just gonna go and say it. Hello Dolly! did not deserve all of it’s awards. DEH did not deserve Best Orchestrations, which rightfully belonged the TGC. Speaking of TGC, that is a show that was truely robbed. Lucas Steele should’ve won best featured actor, not Gavin Creel. He literally danced, sung, acted and played advanced violin all at the same time. And the set of TGC was basically stairs and platforms, so it was more of a challenge. He deserved it an I will stand by that until I die.

- Mike Faist didn’t deserve the nomination. He was barely on stage and barely a character.

- Falsettos wasn’t robbed. Don’t even start me.

- I CANNOT HANDLE LAMS. OR JAMILTON. I JUST CANT.

- I you want to know why I can’t handle Hamilton ships (Lams and Jamilton in particular) than DM me and I’ll give you my 700 word essay because damn.

- I’m going to get attacked for this but here is a list of actors/actresses that are widely overrated in my opinion (I’m not saying that they’re bad because they are obviously amazing but I don’t really connect with them): Mike Faist, Phillipa Soo, Lin Manuel Miranda, Ben Platt, Daveed Diggs, Barret Wilbert Weed, Ben Frankhauser (i spelt his name wrong i am so sorry), Gavin Creel, Andrew Ranelles, Jonathan Groff, Laura Osnes (butchered her name too i think?), Willemijn Verkaik, Desi Oakley, Mariah Rose Faith.

- I don’t really like Mariah Rose Faith’s voice and while she is honestly amazing, I feel like she isn’t right for Regina George.

- One of the best shows to ever grace the Broadway stage is Natasha, Pierre and the Great Comet of 1812.

- I’ve read War and Peace over 4 times. I know the plotline. TGC covers it perfectly. The acting, the actual stage and how it is so interactive, Lucas Steele, the way that all the ensemble dances, sings and play and instrument, Lucas Steele, Lucas Steele playing the violin. Like damn. It is the true meaning of robbed.

- Lucas Steele deserves so much more recognition.

- I like Denee’s Natasha better than Pippa’s. They are both incredible singers who blow me away everything they open their mouths, but I feel like Denee really shows Natasha’s character. Pippa does the same with Eliza.

- Lucas Steele and Reeve Carney recognition month. Their falsettos can blow me into next Spring.

- The ‘and Peggy’ joke was never funny. Watch me offend the whole Hamilton fandom with that.

- Lams isn’t or wasn’t real. Sorry.

- Say what you goddamn want, but I will literally never like the Prom. I have been called homophobic for not liking it so many times and I really am not. I just don’t like the music, I’m not saying that I’m against the LGBT community,

- I have watched all of Glee (and a secret deleted bootleg of Darren Criss’s Hedwig run) and I don’t like Darren Criss. There. I said it.

- Here’s a list of underrated actors/actresses: Leslie Odom Jr, LUCAS STEELE, The entire Broadway cast of Natasha, Pierre and the Great Comet of 1812, Rachel Tucker, Jessie Mueller, Eva Nobelzada, REEVE CARNEY, Christy Altomare.

- I don’t like how LMM was actually in Hamilton or In The Heights. He can write songs, sure, but he’s not the best singer. I feel like Javi should’ve been on the cast recordings. Then I would be more inclined to listen to them.

- These are only the ones that I can think of without having to actually think (this sentence makes no sense) so I’m sorry if I offended you. Please remember that this is just my opinion.

[cardi-c]

miasma

c: @drenrum44

[missblanchette]

Rumor Has It [4/10]

Series: Hypnosis Mic

Characters: Izanami Hifumi/Yumeno Gentaro; appearances from Jakurai and Doppo

Rating: T

Summary: Thousands of hearts broke that day. With tears shed and cries resounding to the heavens, each grief-stricken woman wondered how this could possibly happen. In the year 20XX of the H. Era, Matenrou’s MC GIGOLO and Fling Posse’s MC Phantom were officially in a relationship.

Except they weren’t, actually.

Notes: Please see the end notes on AO3 for some kinda lengthy cultural notes!

Words: 4,216

ko-fi // Ch. 1 | Ch. 2 | Ch. 3 | You can read this on AO3! Hope you enjoy~! thanks for reading!! (* ﾟ∀ﾟ)ﾉｼ

Ch 4: Burying the Hatchet

Hifumi sure was as lucky as Jakurai said he was. He only needed to stay at Shinjuku Central an extra day to make sure that everything was stable, otherwise he was right as rain. Y'know, besides the bruise the IV left him and the sutures in his abdomen, but. Details. After he was all cleared, Jakurai brought him back home after he was done with his shift, though Hifumi insisted he could get by on his own. Nevertheless, Jakurai kept an ever watchful on him, his presence a welcome comfort against the shooting pain that came with every step.

"Doppo, I'm ho~me!"

Upon entering the apartment, they found Doppo hunched over his knees on the couch and his hands clenched tightly at his hair. Doppo's head snapped up as Hifumi announced his return, the bags underneath his eyes heavier than last he remembered seeing them. Shooting up from his seat, he marched towards them with a finger pointed at Hifumi.

"Hifumi, you idiot!" Doppo jabbed his finger into Hifumi's chest, his voice raw. Up close like this, he could see how red Doppo's eyes were. "How do you get stabbed? Again?! What would've happened if -- if -- if --"

The warmth leaving Hifumi's side, Jakurai strode over to Doppo and pulled him against his heart. "Deep breaths," he told him as he rubbed circles onto his back, and steadily Doppo regained his composure. Meanwhile, Hifumi smiled and took Doppo's hand in his.

"You're kinda cranky, Doppo~ Have you been eating well? Sorry I didn't leave any food for you while I was gone!"

From Jakurai's arms, Doppo glared at him though he made no move to slap Hifumi away. His frown deepened. "Why don't you ever think about yourself for once?"

Hifumi shrugged. "Should I?"

Doppo groaned and hit his head against Jakurai's chest. Tenderly, Jakurai threaded his fingers through Doppo's hair.

"Now, Doppo-kun, Hifumi-kun is back home safe and sound. Shouldn't we be happy about that?"

"I know -- I am -- it's just that..." Sighing, he stepped back from Jakurai's arms. He turned to Hifumi, the anger in his face giving way to weariness. "Hifumi. Please be more careful."

"Aw, Doppo-chin!" Ignoring the soreness in his arm, Hifumi wrapped Doppo into a hug. Without a second thought, he pulled Jakurai in as well and rocked the three of them back and forth. "Don't you guys worry 'bout a thing, I've faced scarier things than some knife!"

"That doesn't make me feel any better." Despite the exasperation in his words, Doppo leaned into his embrace.

At his side, Jakurai chuckled and patted Hifumi's head. "Hifumi-kun, why don't you rest up? Would you like something to eat?"

"It's okay! I can make dinner --"

"Oh no, you don't," Doppo said, dragging him towards the couch before he could skip off into the kitchen. "Not in your condition."

"But it's just dinner!"

"Doppo-kun is right.” Making sure Hifumi was seated properly, Jakurai adjusted the pillows on his sides. “In order for you to heal quickly, you should avoid putting stress on your body."

Hifumi squirmed. "I cook all the time, it won't be so bad."

"You need to rest," said Doppo. "I'll cook."

As if tasting Doppo's food already, Hifumi's face pinched together. "But your cooking sucks."

"I --" Doppo paused, the dark clouds looming over his head. "T-That's right, I'm so bad at cooking. Last time I tried, I set the rice on fire. And the time before that, the cup noodles --"

Before his self-deprecating tirade could spiral down further, Jakurai placed a hand on Doppo's shoulder. "Why don't I help you, Doppo-kun?"

He shook his head, resigned. "You don't have to, Jinguji-san. I'll order take out."

"Well, if you and Doc are cooking, then it should be fine!"

"But --"

"Let's do our best for Hifumi-kun, hm?" Jakurai took his hand, gracing him with a small smile. Adding to that, Hifumi grinned and gave him two thumbs up.

He glanced at Jakurai, then to Hifumi. Lips pursing in determination, Doppo nodded. "Right."

"Hey, can you guys make pasta?" Hifumi bounced in his seat, his wound burning with each hop. "Oh, oh! Or how 'bout sukiyaki?"

Doppo flicked his forehead with no real force, getting an "Ow!" from him regardless. "What do you think we are? Five-star chefs?"

"We'll see what we can do," said Jakurai, an amused lilt in his voice. "Now, please try not to move around so much. We don't want you re-opening the wound."

Hifumi saluted. "Aye-aye, Doc!"

With that, the two of them headed towards the kitchen. They’d turned the TV on to keep Hifumi entertained but coincidentally, the news was discussing the incident that happened a couple days prior; particularly about how they apprehended the woman who'd attacked him.

"But you belong to me!" Her distorted voice screeched from behind the screen, a low quality video of that night playing. "This is for your sake, Hifumi!"

Hifumi frowned, recalling how the police had visited him earlier to discuss the matter. When he'd brought up healing her with Jakurai's raps instead of flat out arresting her, they'd immediately shot him down. It wasn't like she meant to stab him. She just wasn't in the right mind! All she needed was help to see what she did wrong then she could've been left alone. Sadly, no one working on the case bothered to hear him out.

The news went on to discuss his relationship with Yumeno Gentaro, but honestly, Hifumi could care less for the rumors themselves. When you were Shinjuku's number one host, people spread stuff about you all the time to ruin your rep. If others got involved, though, he wouldn’t let them slide so easily. He hadn’t been thinking when he pushed Gentaro out of the way, but it'd be a lie if he said he regretted it. Like how he had protected Doppo, like how he would protect Jakurai, Hifumi wouldn't dare let anyone get hurt because of him -- rival or not.

Especially not when he remembered Gentaro's face. Not when he remembered how ashen he looked in spite of the jabs he threw at the woman, or how shaken his green eyes appeared to be as he gawked at him. For all of Gentaro's high-and-mightiness on the battle stage, he was anything but when he caught him in his arms. Gentaro showed no hint of vulnerability when facing him in Chuuoku, not one sign of fear the way he did during the incident. And that look of fear was a thing that weighed heavily on him.

Fear was a feeling Hifumi knew all too well, a feeling he shoved deep, deep, deep into the depths of his mind; fear was a feeling that haunted him, a feeling that blamed him for every single, little thing that he did. If only he'd acted faster, Hifumi berated himself, then maybe he would've avoided seeing the fear on Gentaro's face that night.

His eyes fluttering closed, one thought crossed Hifumi's mind: did Gentaro get home safely?

It was one thing to be cooped up at home, it was another to have limits on his usual routine. No laundry except folding because he twisted a lot during loading and hanging; no cleaning because he bent too often to reach every spot; no grocery shopping because lifting caused too much strain. Talk about boring. That wasn’t to say he didn’t appreciate Doppo and Jakurai’s efforts to cover those things for him but life wasn’t the most exciting when all he could do was light cooking and wander around the apartment. He couldn’t even spam text Doppo, Jakurai, or Matenrou’s group chat since they were busy at work. Legs rubbing together like a cricket, Hifumi flipped through the TV channels in hopes of finding something entertaining.

Suddenly, the doorbell rang and Hifumi shot up from the couch. Wincing as the bruise pinched him and the wound pierced him, he practically ran over to the intercom. The grin he'd been wearing puckered into confusion as he saw who was at the door: Yumeno Gentaro, posture rimrod straight and hands folded within his sleeves. Don’t get him wrong, Hifumi was glad to see him okay after what happened, but he wasn’t exactly who he expected. Not dwelling on it too hard, he reached for the door handle but the memory of Gentaro's feminine act hit him faster than he could open it up. Stomach churning, he bit his lip.

The sharp pain but an afterthought, Hifumi dashed to his room and dug through his closet. He was down a suit jacket, but there were definitely more where it came from. There was one where the seams were coming loose (sewing didn't count as "too strenuous," right?); this one, the cuff buttons were falling off (another sewing project to be done); that one was getting kinda small (he could probably tailor this to size); and -- ah! He grabbed the one farthest in and threw it on top of his sweatshirt. It wasn't his favorite jacket, but it'd do.

Leaving his room with the saunter of a host, Hifumi opened the door in time to see Gentaro walking away.

"Oh, Yumeno-sensei~" he said, posing against the door frame. Gentaro turned around, brows furrowing as soon as his eyes landed on him. "What brings you to my humble abode?"

"Nothing in particular." Haltingly, Gentaro came face-to-face with him. "Simply staking out the competition, is all."

"And what competition would that be?"

"Need I remind you? I told you I've been considering becoming a host. With you out of commission, now would be the perfect opportunity."

"Mhm, but that was a lie, no?"

A mirthless smile grew on Gentaro's face. "I see your memory is still in tact."

"It was my body that was injured, not my mind." In return, Hifumi smirked. "Then again, how could I forget such a riveting discussion with an equally interesting kitten."

"Is that so?" Gentaro gave him a look, though it held no actual bite. "To cut to the chase, I figured I owe you some gratitude for the other day."

A beat passing, Gentaro pulled a box out of his sleeve -- Sakura Momo Strawberries to be exact, a gift not unlike the many lavishes his kittens bestowed upon him. Their fingers brushing against each others', Hifumi took it with a hum of approval.

"Sakura Momo Strawberries? This is quite the show of gratitude, Yumeno-sensei."

"Like I said, this is merely hospitality for what you've done for me. Nothing more, nothing less."

Pressing the strawberries to his chest, Hifumi put on a smolder. "Why, to think you've thought of me touches my heart~"

"You're fortunate that's the only thing touching you," said Gentaro, a sigh accompanying his words. "Anyhow, that’s all I came here for. I’ll be taking my leave."

"Oh, so soon?" Host mode taking full reign, Hifumi asked, "Why don't you stay for a while and join me for lunch?"

"As exhilarating as the invitation sounds, I have other business to attend to."

"You can't spare an hour? It's ever so lonely staying home alone."

Gentaro’s gaze shifted from side-to-side. "Even if I could, I don't believe it would be very wise."

"Why not, pray tell?"

Gentaro’s lips tightened. "I'd rather not risk any more rumors being spread about the two of us."

Scoffing, Hifumi waved him off. "If that's what you're afraid of, worry not. Security here was improved after the last incident."

Not giving him the chance to respond, Hifumi took Gentaro's wrist and pulled him inside. Gentaro stood rigidly at the entryway, scanning the room before he carefully removed his shoes and murmured a low "Pardon my intrusion."

"Make yourself at home, Yumeno-sensei~" Placing a hand to the small of Gentaro's back, Hifumi lead him to the couch.

Gentaro stepped away from his touch, though he followed along nonetheless. "Out of curiosity, do you always wear that suit jacket inside the house?"

"Is there a reason not to?"

"It seems rather uncomfortable, is it not?"

With a flourish of his hands, Hifumi flashed a pose. "I'm most comfortable when I can be myself."

Eyeing him, Gentaro sat down. "I see."

"Is there anything you'd like to eat, Yumeno-sensei? How about a drink?" Hifumi asked, ready to make his way to the kitchen. "Ah, you'll have to forgive me. Doppo and Dr. Jakurai have done the cooking, so I think it's best if we order takeout."

"There's no need. I've already eaten before coming here."

"Surely you have room for a little more?" Taking a seat beside him, Hifumi opened the box of strawberries with the grace that came from popping open champagne bottles every night. He tilted it towards Gentaro. "After all, I can't possibly finish this by myself."

Gentaro's green eyes met his, glancing back and forth between him and the box. With nimble fingers, he plucked up a strawberry. "I suppose one or two won't hurt."

Like so, Hifumi took a strawberry for himself. "I must say you have exquisite taste, Yumeno-sensei. Sakura Momo Strawberries are among my favorites."

A shrug to his shoulders, Gentaro gestured vaguely. "My life is worth as much as the price."

Humming, Hifumi bit into his strawberry -- perhaps too big a bite since juice spurt out and dripped down his chin. Skillfully, he grabbed a tissue and dabbed himself clean.

"Oh, you've a stain on your jacket."

Hifumi looked down, seeing that what Gentaro said was true. On the lapel laid a red stain small enough that it wouldn't be too difficult to get out, but big enough that it was quite noticeable.

"Why, I do," he said, pressing the tissue to it. "No matter, I'll clean it up later."

"Are you sure? Why don't you allow me take care of it? Consider it another way of expressing my gratitude." As he’d spoken, Gentaro reached out for his jacket and Hifumi chuckled nervously.

"Oho, there's no need for that," Hifumi said, pushing Gentaro’s wrists to the sides. "You're the guest here, let me take care of myself."

Gentaro's gaze fell to his suit jacket, eyes lingering for a moment longer than necessary. "If you insist."

"Please help yourself, Yumeno-sensei. I'll return soon."

Leaving Gentaro behind, Hifumi strode towards his room with slow steps; something that not only lessened the aches in his body, but also bade him time. How terrible, Hifumi thought, to be cornered in the comfort of your own home. While he might've faced Gentaro out of host mode before, he had Doppo or Jakurai there with him at least. Without his suit, he lacked the ability to finesse his way out of the situation, the confidence to tackle his problems head on. Staring at his vanity's mirror, Hifumi weighed his options: take off the suit jacket and face the possibility of a breakdown should Gentaro pull anything, or replace it and face scrutiny.

Then again, perhaps he was assuming the worst of Gentaro. It was strange that he showed up at his apartment, admittedly, let alone knew where he lived, but he hadn't shown any sign of ulterior motives so far. He'd even gave him strawberries, which could be seen as a peace offering of sorts. Pretty as a kitten he might be, the chances of him doing anything hostile were low. Or at least, he hoped so. Choosing to give him the benefit of the doubt, Hifumi carefully slid off his jacket and put it away for washing. He clapped his cheeks and took a breath before returning to the living room.

"Totes soz if I made you wait long, Yumeno-sensei! Your neighborhood friendly Hifumin's back~"

As he plopped back into his seat, Gentaro gave him a once over. His head tilted and he quirked a brow up. "There's certainly a different air to you."

"Y'know what they say: clothes make the man. Or something!" With that, Hifumi popped a strawberry into his mouth.

"Indeed they do." Gentaro nodded along, taking a bite of his own strawberry. "You seem rather chipper for someone who's left the hospital, if I may say. I take it recovery is going well?"

"Psh, it was just a little stab! It wasn't like it was my first time anyways," he said, a laugh ending his sentence.

"You did mention that before..." He trailed off, Hifumi hearing hesitance in Gentaro's words for once. "Excuse me if this is too invasive, but may I ask as to what happened?"

Bouncing forward, Hifumi drummed his palms against his knees. Gentaro startled back a bit, a hand flying to his chest.

"Funny story actually! That's how I met Dr. Jakurai!"

He jumped right into it, recounting the whole Stalker Incident right from the night the woman had broken into the apartment. His hands fluttered around him as he mimed every lash, every hit, every freak out; his voice changed into bad imitations of Doppo, Jakurai, and the woman when he spoke their parts. All the while, he ignored the phantom pain in his arm, as well as the aches his bruise and wound brought. How couldn't he when he had a story to tell, of course! What finally brought him to a pause, though, was when he noticed that Gentaro's attention was focused elsewhere.

"...and Doc looked sooo awesome when his speakers turned on and -- hey, what's that?"

Gentaro froze, a pen in hand and a book on his lap, and he blinked as if broken out of a spell. Slowly, he tucked the pen inside the book and closed it.

"I hear better when I can read what's being said," Gentaro told him. "So I like to transcribe every word I hear."

"Ooh, like subtitles? Y'know, Doppo mumbles when he's really tired and I can barely understand him, so maybe I should do that."

Green eyes running over him, Gentaro's lips tugged up.

"That was a lie, although I do apologize for writing down your story without your permission." Gaze falling to the book's cover, he tapped it. "I must admit, I found it rather interesting and couldn't help but pen it."

"Whoa, so that's like your writing book?" Without warning, Hifumi reached for it but Gentaro swiped it up.

"Yes, it's a book in which I write in," Gentaro said, holding it close to his chest.

"Boo, y'know what I mean. Like a book where you write all your ideas and stuff!"

"Well, I suppose you're not wrong in that regard either."

"That's so cool!"

Again, Hifumi grabbed for it but Gentaro raised it higher into the air. He tried once more, standing up for leverage but Gentaro followed suit and raised the book even higher. Hifumi pouted.

"I wanna see it."

"Why should I let you?"

"Why not?"

"Hm, that's not a good enough reason." Presenting the notebook as it were an ancient relic, Gentaro took on the voice of an elderly sage. "Only they whom art worthy enough art allowed to lay their eyes upon mine inspirations."

Folding his arms, Hifumi puckered his lips in thought. He bobbed his head up and down, mumbling as he racked through his mind for any decent reason. The pain throughout his body pinched him and he gasped, slapping his hands to his cheeks.

"You should let me see it 'cause I'm injured!"

Gentaro squinted. "I fail to see the correlation."

"’Cause I’m injured, I’ve been stuck here, right?" Hifumi said, throwing his arms out and swinging them about as if to capture the living room’s space. "And it's been su~per boring in the house, y'know? So like, reading your book will cure my boredom and make me feel way better!"

Silence was his reply, accompanied by a stare of green eyes. Peering down, Gentaro leafed through his notebook and the pages flittered by like the wings of a hummingbird. Once he'd reached the end, he closed the book with a definitive snap and met his eyes. For the first time that day, Gentaro let out the smallest of chuckles.

"Very well then," he said, the slightest hint of amusement in his tone. "Who am I to deny an ill man a cure?"

Giving his notebook one last look, Gentaro handed it to him.

"Yay~! Don't worry, Yumeno-sensei, I'll be extra careful with it!"

"Thou should be," Gentaro replied in his sage's voice. "Or else thou wouldst have to face the wrath of the gods otherwise."

"Those gods sound kinda grumpy." Giggling, Hifumi flopped back into his seat and opened the book like a child eager for story time.

To be honest, Hifumi didn't know what to expect from a writer's journal but what he did know was that it was as entertaining as he thought it would be. More, even! With handwriting as pretty as the writer himself, Gentaro's notebook was filled with various notes and out-of-context scenes and lines of dialogue. Scratch outs were made, parallel to the lines; arrows pointed here and there, connecting ideas together; little doodles drawn in the margins helped illustrate his ideas further, though there was definitely a reason Gentaro was a writer and not an artist. Nonetheless, each page was worn with care and something about that made Hifumi smile.

Skimming the pages, he caught sight of a familiar name. He flipped back quickly, jaw dropping when he landed on it. He pointed at the name and shook Gentaro's arm.

"Hey, that's TOP DANDY!"

"Ah, indeed. Like I said, I was doing research."

"Research for what?"

Gentaro held a finger to his lips. "Now that's a secret."

"You can't give a hint?" Hifumi whined, pouting.

"Nope," Gentaro said, popping the "p." His eyes scanned the page, index finger trailing along until he landed on a list of rankings. "But I did mean to inquire more about this..."

From the types of drinks they kept in a host club, to the hobbies of a host, to the activities that went on behind the scenes, Gentaro went over each detail and Hifumi was more than happy to throw in his input. The journal sitting between their laps as they bounced off ideas, Hifumi watched as Gentaro scribbled down what he’d said and so they continued on like that -- Hifumi pointing at each and every line with the awe of a starry-eyed child and Gentaro further explaining the notes he so meticulously jotted down. Hifumi hadn't ever read a single one of Gentaro's books before, but if hearing the process behind them meant anything, then his actual novels must've been just as good!

It was easy to lose track of time when immersed in the world of another, however. The next thing Hifumi knew, the front door swung open.

"I'm home -- huh?"

"Doppo, welcome back!" His head turned towards Doppo, who looked back at him with his brows creased and his mouth hanging. Grinning, he tipped the journal in Gentaro's direction. "Look, look, Yumenon stopped by to visit me!"

The poker face Gentaro wore turned into one of bemusement, eyes leaving Doppo and snapping back to him. "'Yumenon'?"

"Yeah, ‘Yumenon’. 'Cause it’s cuter than 'sensei'!"

Doppo's awkward laughter broke into the moment, warily stepping into the apartment as if he was the guest.

"Ah, it's good that Yumeno-san kept you company..." He glanced nervously at Gentaro. "Er, is Yumeno-san staying over tonight or...?"

Looking at the window, Hifumi's eyes widened. "Oh my God, yeah, it's like super late! Wanna stay for dinner?"

Gentaro shook his head, plucking his notebook from Hifumi's hands and thumbing through it to make sure not a page was out of place.

"I'm afraid I'll have to decline. I should head home now if I don't want to miss the train."

"You sure?" Hifumi leaned in with a hand covering his mouth, whispering a little too loudly to be considered a whisper. "I'll cook something while Doppo's not looking and he doesn't have to know."

Huffing out a laugh, Gentaro stood up and tucked the notebook into his pocket.

"Yes, I'm quite sure. I believe I've overstayed my welcome, anyhow. Take care... Izanami-san," he said, bowing his head slightly. Then, he turned to Doppo and did the same. "Kannonzaka."

"Aw, okay..." Hifumi said, following him to the entrance. With the elegance of a host, he opened the door for him and waved. "Bye bye, Yumenon! Come visit again!"

He gave him a wry smile. "I'll consider it."

And with that, Gentaro was gone.

"Seems like you had fun today," Doppo said once he'd closed the door.

Beaming, Hifumi turned to him with his chest puffed out and his hands on his hips. Aches and pains aside, the day turned out better than he thought it would. Though Gentaro was the last person he expected to drop by, certainly his presence broke the monotony of being cooped up at home. From the strawberries to the notes of his journal, Gentaro had given him more than he could imagine -- a colorful world filled with things he'd never stopped to think about and a vibrant perspective he’d never considered. The image of the pretentious writer he'd faced on Chuuoku’s stage fading away, Hifumi figured Gentaro wasn't as bad as he originally thought him to be. Well, he wasn't one to hold a grudge anyways.

"Yeah, lots! Like -- wait. Here, Doppo-chin, have some strawberries! Yumenon brought them! Oh, and we gotta save some for Doc, too..."

[madamhatter]

am i valid for url meme...

Send Me A URL and I’ll Respond With My Opinions… / accepting 

Roleplaying/Writing

My favorite muse(s) of theirs and why: Bamboo Rice will have a special place in my heart because I love big ol’ dorks whO WILL DO ANYTHING FOR THE PEOPLE/THINGS THEY LOVE. And Bamboo was really the one I got to know and we were able to somewhat extend conversation about him :’D. 

My favorite interaction/thread of theirs: Any time Xander literally opens his mouth and everyone else has to reply like “NO” and he’s like “YES.” I really just love how your general interactions can literally terrorize multiple blogs/fandoms in one successful swoop, no matter which character it is. I only know so few of your characters but I can tell this is something that has happened frequently with the others.My thoughts on their unique characterization/interpretation of their muse(s): what do you mean tsun isn’t Bamboo’s writer? And Boston Lobster’s? And Xander’s?  Why am I being fed these lies? However, there was one thing I noticed that I adored and that was the fact you really brought in actual and plausible headcanons that make sense in relation to the character’s upbringing and what they have and may not have experienced. IE: I remember Bamboo being mentioned (by you) to be illiterate due to their surroundings and being deep in the forest. As strange as it sounds, people really don’t go that far down into detail and I appreciate it. My thoughts on their writing style as a whole: You know that meme where Gordon Ramsey says “finally, some good fucking food”?  That’s literally me when I see any of Tsun’s posts, IC or OOC. I just like reading their stuff and being intimated by the writing in a way that pushes to me to go back to my more serious writing times. Also don’t get me started on their meme ANSWERS, IM HONESTLY RECOVERING FROM SEVERAL ON XANDER’S BLOGS, DON’T @ ME IT READS LIKE POETRY - Situation(s)/Plot(s) I’d love to see their muse(s) in: HMMM… I would like to see Xander in an AU where he properly is a king of a land, even if it is through questionable means (which may be slightly OOC); I do think your Sengoku M. muses will have a god damn fun time in a deity-based AU. Lmao, and if you have doubles, you can always mimick the Evillous Chronicles series with like twins (Daughter of Evil, Servant of Evil, Regret Message, etc.) because those are fun times :3ccccSomeone else I love seeing them interact with: @box-of-characters and @cirocchio ; no questions about that. No matter which character, it IS THE FUNNIEST THING TO ME. Anything else I want to say about their roleplaying: So how the hell does a gem like you stay hidden for so long? What’s your secret? Why keep hidden?? I’m going to have to hold you high in the air for folks to realize the quality that is you as a writer. 

If We Know Eachother

What I Think Are Their Best Qualities: Can deal with my bullshit, has the shitty sense of humor like me, and doesn’t find me annoying. Tsun just really knows how to get the dash working and chat with others, making a whole group experience that doesn’t exclude anyone. Tsun also takes heavy consideration and stuff when writing for characters and trying not to insert his midwestern twang in otherwise very regal mouths. Seriouly, though, I think his best qualities will alwas be the way they’re able to frame their characters’ emotions and always involve movement with them, making a whole scene play out. It isn’t stagnant, it’s always flowing, like a river.What I Think Are Their Strengths: Can laugh and tolerate my horrible fucking puns. It’s just super easy and comfortable to talk to you and get to know you! I say that not only are you an amiable personality, I really do say that at the end of the day, you care for your fellow roleplayers much more than writing partners and more as friends. This is beyond writing that I’ll consistently gush about but, I get that you’re an all around package who brings your A+ game and only deserves the best. A Memorable OOC Interaction Of Ours: How…how do I choose one?? I usually send him very cursed things over Tumblr IMs (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=120HFjKPuJ4) and we’ve explored the realm of what strange things seiyuus sing. Every OOC interaction is memorable! Why Others Should RP With Them: It’s really hard nowadays to find roleplayers that really care for their characters but also know when to mess around and not take them as seriously. With the addition in being dedicated to building their characters and open to new and exciting ways to interact, I don’t why why you aren’t following yet. Also, he helps me cope with the stupid and long novella replies with eveN BETTER ONES SO, YOU GOT THAT BONUS. How Others Should Approach Them: Maybe it’s me and I see that it’s really easy to message people like a moron like “he-hewwo??” But, I always say drop into Tsun’s messages and drop a hello! I always say it’s better to drop in to meet the person first rather than their writing. It helps build bonds! Other Roleplayers I’d Recommend To Them: @vacuitas ; I think both of your multimuse blogs will greatly mesh well together and with Kat’s blog backstory and OCs should really be explored and you got some interesting personalities on both of your blogs that can either get along or hate very much! Anything else I want to say about them: how you haven’t gotten tired of me yet and the weird things I’ve sent you is beyond me– But, Tsun, you’re a real sweetheart and know how to bring a smile to my face without realizing it ;v;

If We Have/Plan To Interact

A plot I’d like to write with them: ANYTHING. ANYTHING. just honestly throw me ideas about AUs and I’m like butter, easy to melt and get into things. *steeples hands* If there’s any way I can make a character suffer at the expense of one of mine getting hurt or being mean, lmk :eyes:. Maybe hm… “Asselin you’re not a demon and those horns are totally fake - what the bloody hell. No I’m not going to stop pulling these horns these are NO way real ” AU. A muse I want to introduce to them: Natsume from Enstars. Just trust me, just trust me you will love that little shit and he’ll fit in with your crowd and he curses people like a fucking moron please I LOVE HIM… Since you like characters in trashbags, but I want you to have a variety, I can also bleed in some of my Mogeko charas like Shirogane (a scaredy cat wolf) and Battler Ushiromiya from Umineko (he’s a man who defies meta to solve the murders of his family that fateful October 4th, 1986). Also Phantom from Maplestory, I …love him to bits, he’s amazing. He’s gorgeous, he’s powerful, tends to not take things seriously is a phantom thief but I …oh god I love him so much : ‘ ) A ship/broship I’d like to propose to them: Xander/Sophie’s dynamic is amazing, I love when the bourgeois and the peasants argue. I’m also glad that their relationship can translate on different levels but there’s always that call-back to bickering yet support. If I can propose another, uhh– I really like Bamboo/Spam as a friendship and Boston/Spam as a mix of plato/romo (not too sure but I really liked their differences, i can see it as a “grey” area).  UHHHH… Asselin/Sophie looks like it could be a god damn trip :tm: bc a servant of satan of a witch sounds all sorts of chaos :3c. A thread with them I’m excited about: CHISANA THREAD, CHISANA THREAD! GIANT ASS DRAGON INDEBT TO WITCH AND HE REGRETS TURNING HUMAN BUT THEN HE REGRETS TURNING BACK AND … YEAH.  Anything else I want to say: God has forsaken you since you’re my friend and I hope you realize the path you’re now down wnjdfksnfdsj/. 

[kyuniichi]

Persona 5 groupchat head canons (kinda spoilery)

I’ve seen a few fanfics where it’s literally just the Phantom Thieves dicking around in their group chat and that inspired me to post this and honestly I put way too much thought into it

Akira:

- okay he’s not too different from what we see in the game, meaning most of his replies are like 5 words at most, even after someone sends him an entire fucking essay in text

- he will occasionally send cat pictures (Morgana included, but only when he’s asleep) and everyone mutually agrees it’s the highlight of their week

- he’s never there for any of the late night chats because of You-Know-Who so he always misses all of the crazy shit when everyone is sleep deprived (rip in pieces) but it’s always the first thing he checks when he wakes up

- can get very snarky at times but that’s just his inner Joker coming out

- you can fucking bet he talks for Morgana whenever he wants to say something (Morgana’s messages always end with a - M)

Ryuji:

- “do aliens believe in us??” sent at 3AM

- quite the expert at memes

- ALL CAPS AND !!!!! WHEN EXCITED NO EXCEPTIONS

- “dude do you think I could trick Morgana into eating expired cat food” 

- “wait Akira pls don’t let Morgana read that” “Too late - M” “FCUK”

- can get surprisingly deep sometimes but it’s always about things that aren’t really relevant

- probably never sleeps because he seems to always be around in the chat

- “god damn it Ryuji” is a common sight in the chat

Ann:

- when she first joined the Phantom Thieves and it was just her, Ryuji and Akira, she was surprised to wake up in the middle of the night to Ryuji spamming memes but was even more surprised when Akira replied with his own memes the next morning

- “why do I talk to you guys”

- she found it annoying at first but she could never stop herself from checking her phone every time she got a notification in the chat

- by the time Makoto joins, she’s just as much of a meme freak as Ryuji and Akira and she has no regrets

- she’s always making plans with the others to “scope out the new desserts” whenever a new restaurant or cafe opens

- basically she’s gone on a dessert date with at least every member

Yusuke:

- Proper grammar, punctuation and spelling squad

- the only one who seriously replies to Ryuji’s “do aliens believe in us??” questions which prompts hour long conversations between the two

- he has no knowledge of memes at all so he’s always questioning them and Ryuji and Ann have to explain them to him but luckily they’re very patient with him

- mainly because they’re secretly hoping for the day where he uses a meme himself

- Yusuke: “here come dat boi?” Ryuji: “O SHIT WADDUP” Ann: “our son is finally growing up”

- we all know how lowkey savage Yusuke is without even realizing it

- Futaba: “damn it there’s a new game I want but I’m short 200 yen” Yusuke: “Aren’t you just short in general?” Futaba: *table flip emoji*

- “holy shit Yusuke” is another common sight in the chat after he delivers a particularly savage roast

- “????” is always his reply

Makoto:

- Proper grammar, punctuation and spelling squad

- definitely the mother of the group but the kind who will kick your ass without hesitation so everyone is lowkey scared of her

- in charge of arranging study sessions and always reminds everyone in the chat when they’re coming up

- she scolds the others (sans Akira) whenever they’re up at an ungodly hour on school days but no one ever points out that she’s also up because, again, lowkey scared

- they just assume she’s studying but really she’s a huge hypocrite playing animal crossing under her covers in the dark

- she’ll never admit it but she sometimes laughs at Ryuji’s memes

Futaba:

- everyone thought Ryuji was the Meme Lord but then Futaba joined the chat

- “step aside peasants, i am here”

- always uses emojis but like only the angry or smug looking ones

- the only time she uses any happy or sparkly emojis is after she insults someone

- gets into arguments with Yusuke over the stupidest shit and then gets over it like 2 seconds later

- goes on long rants about video games and the only one who really understands her is surprisingly Makoto

Haru:

- Proper grammar, punctuation and spelling squad

- her sleep schedule is all over the place so no one ever really knows when she’s awake or asleep because it’s different every week

- she actually remembers that Morgana can read their chat so she’s the only one who actively talks to him and for that he is Truly Grateful

- everyone agrees she’s a saint

- but then she’ll bring up random and creepy facts that throws everyone for a loop

- “Sometimes mother hamsters eat their young.”

- “what the fuck Haru” is yet another common sight in the chat

Bonus Akechi:

- Proper grammar, punctuation and spelling squad but only when he’s not sleep deprived

- he talks the least but he’s always lurking so he knows what’s going on at all times

- only really says anything when he feels the need to or when someone directly mentions him

- like Makoto, he’ll never admit that he has a fair knowledge of memes

- unlike Makoto, he believes Ryuji’s meme game is weak

- the longer he’s with the Phantom Thieves, the more passive aggressive he gets, but only in the chat, otherwise he’s still the same “all smiles and polite attitude” in rl

- he’s grown fond of lightly teasing Ryuji but sometimes he’ll think he’s gone too far until Ann or Futaba go, “HA get rekt Ryuji”

- whenever he’s tired and staying up late at night working on a case and the chat won’t stop blowing up his phone, he’ll say something like “if you all don’t shut the hell up and go to bed i swear i will gut you all in your sleep”

- he always apologizes the next morning and blames it on sleep deprivation and everyone just pretends to buy it

[joseph-joestar-plz-twerk-4-me]

eyy i was tagged by @lancekoganee, @lovelylangst, and @fictionismynationality for the 92 truths thing so here it issss

LAST… [1] drink: dr pepper [2] phone call: uh well the last like 5 people to call me were spam numbers but the last i actually talked on was with my sister [3] text message: bff callie [4] song you listened to: just one yesterday by fall out boy [5] time you cried: a few hours ago when i remembered my characters name in the demi episode game that i played a year and a half ago was “whipe dat azz”

HAVE YOU EVER… [6] dated someone twice: unfortunately yes [7] been cheated on: no [8] kissed someone and regretted it: no [9] lost someone special: ?? im not sure bc there’s a lot of people who used to be special but the friendship either imploded or slowly died sooo [10] been depressed: no [11] gotten drunk and thrown up: no lol i am rather pure for my age lmao

LIST 3 FAVOURITE COLORS: [12] dark green [13] pastel pink [14] that blue that looks really good in velvet

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU… [15] made new friends: yeah! [16] fallen out of love: yes? im not sure if it was love to begin w sooo [17] laughed until you cried: bruh i did like 3 hours ago lol [18] found out someone was talking about you: yeah apparently im “famous” at best buy bc my coworker (who also works there) was telling his coworkers about shenanigans him and i get into  [19] met someone who changed you: yee [20] found out who your true friends are: yeah. ive cut out a lot of people but its for the better [21] kissed someone on your facebook list: not currently lol (my current bf isnt my friend on facebook lmao)

GENERAL… [22] how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: most of them tbh, but i need to go through and clean out my friends list [23] do you have any pets: 3 cats and a doggo [24] do you want to change your name: nah but a nickname would be cool [25] what did you do for your last birthday: i didnt work  i saw Fantastic Beasts in the morn and had lunch w my bf, then hung out w my friends and had dinner w them and the fam, went home and played sims [26] what time did you wake up: 7-730ish am [27] what were you doing at midnight last night: coming home from work/starting precal hw [28] name something you cannot wait for: obviously voltron season 3 but i also want to jsut get thru the next few weeks bc work is going to be a   n i g h t m a r e  and i want my suffering to be over asap [29] when was the last time you saw your mother: 2 hours ago [30] what is one thing you wish you could change about your life: honestly i would go back in time and tell little middle school me to try out for region (bc i honestly believe if i had just had a year or two more expirience auditioning, then i wouldve made the all state choir) and then go to junior yr me and say “stop being an angry ho and   c a l m   d o w n   . i wish i could go back a year from today and tell myself that the management position is not worth it. to find another job while i can. (however, i use my job as motivation to do well in school: “do well, keep up my gpa, get my degree. i dont want to be at the movie theater forever”) [31] what are you listening to right now: my klance playlist (death of a bachelor is currently playing) [32] have you ever talked to a person named tom: ive talked to a tommy and someone whos last name is toms [33] something that is getting on your nerves: anything customer related/ “can an available manager come to the stand for an employee purchase” [34] most visited website: college homepage, math hw website, tumblr, gmail, netflix (recently made my friend watch voltron every MWF after out speech class lol) [35] elementary: my awkward acne/glasses/pre-braces/braces phase. also i wore training bras for 3 yrs bc i was so uncomfortable w my boobs that i couldnt tell my mom i needed an actual bra [36] high school: i can look at pictures and tell by my smile where i lost my childish innocence (halfway thru junior yr)  [37] college: community rn, but i plan on transfering to tamu and getting at least a bachelors in environmental science. i have to research into carriers to see if a masters/phd is worth it, but that is something im interested in [38] hair color: blonde when clean [39] long or short hair: the question of the century. i look good w a lob, but i also love braiding hair sooo [40] do you have a crush on someone: i mean i have a crush on my bf lance [41] what do you like about yourself: i guess im funny. i can sing the whole danny phantom theme song  [42] piercings: triples in each ear, helix and double forward helix in my right ear (planning on getting a faux snug in my left ear eventually. id like a nose ring, but work wont let me. i maybe want a belly button ring, if i decide to work out for it lol as if) [43]blood type: i dunno, but looking at it makes me queasy so [44] nickname: maycakers, big titty t, mak [45] relationship status: long term relationship (idk how many months now but its over 2 yrs so) [46] zodiac sign: scorpio [47] pronouns: she/her.  [48] fav tv show: voltron, avatar the last airbender (im laughing i typed “airbeder” at firs), the office, drake and josh [49] tattoos: never (ill stick w piercings) [50] right or left hand: right 

FIRST… [51] surgery: does having a wart dug out of my toe count [52] piercing: the standard single pair when i was 6 [53] best friend: aaliyah but once we got to middle school we didnt have classes together and i didnt see her much in highschool (i heard about her bc she broke a lot of sports records. shes gonna be an olympian in 2020 y’all. i can feel it) [54] sport: does drill team count [55] vacation: we went to the state capitol w my grandparents  [56] pair of trainers: wtf are trainers

RIGHT NOW… [57] eating: nothing bc my stomach is currently revolting [58] drinking: grape powerade [59] i’m about to: take a nap gd im tired [60] listening to: euphoria by loreen [61] waiting for: sleep to take me [62] want: my period back ache to stop [63] get married: i want to get married so bad i want to be super domestic and have a bb and that kid is gonna recycle EVERYTHING and i will love them [64] career: ecologist? environmental researcher? environmental biologist? agricultural reformer? idk i just want to do something w the environment 

WHICH IS BETTER… [65] hugs or kisses: hugs  [66] lips or eyes: eyes are pretty [67] shorter or taller: taller bc then ur head is in their chest when u hug. or u have to get on tippy toes to kiss. yes. [68] older or younger: older older older [70] nice arms or nice stomach: yknow stomaches are nice and all but u cant see them bc shirts. u can see arms tho ohmy [71] sensitive or loud: idk im loud so  [72] hook up or relationship: relationship ftw. hook ups sound...really gross to me (my ace ass cant fathom hookups lol) [73] troublemaker or hesitant: hesitant

HAVE YOU EVER… [74] kissed a stranger? ew no [75] drank hard liquor? the only thing ive ever drank ever is a shot of cherry sake (i spit that back out it was gross) and a shot of goldschlager (which cleared sinuses i didnt know i had and made me reaaaalllly giggly) [76] lost glasses/contact lenses? lmao all the time [77] turned someone down: yeah  [78] sex on first date? no [79] broken someone’s heart? yes  [80] had your own heart broken? not really? i felt sad both times i broke up w my ex but i knew it was for the best [81] been arrested? no but ive had someone threaten me w calling the cops [82] cried when someone died? my granny, cat, hamster [83] fallen for a friend? i mean my bf was my friend before we dated so i guess

DO YOU BELIEVE IN… [84] yourself? tbh i am super confident in my schoolwork and just... not at all at work [85] miracles? yeah but sometimes they fail me [86] love at first sight? no  [87] Santa Claus? rip [88] kiss on the first date? ehhh [89] angels? maybe

OTHER… [90] current best friend’s name: CALLIE [91] eye color: blue [92] favorite movie: oh fuq i love tangled and anastasia 

i dont know 20 people or whatever so imma tag @pierce-the-llama, @marcoandthebodts (you sent me one of these like 55245 years ago and i shall do it now lol), @connors-sweet-ass, and @justklance if y’all want to 

[byopposing-endthem]

At Twilight

The fluorescent lights wash out the rows of chips, fading their eye-searing bags to nostalgic hues. A low tune, colored with an undertone of static, drifts from a cheap portable radio placed on the checkout counter. As he wanders the aisles of the cramped minimart, stroking a finger over ancient-looking cans of Spam stacked in neat rows, Ronan could almost pretend he was a minor character in Stranger Things, instead of the sort of person who does grocery shopping at in the middle of the night after a night shift at McDonald’s.

He thinks about how he ended up like this, smelling of French-fry grease, feeling the phantom weight of a too-tight headset squeezing his skull with each step. When he graduated last year with a degree in communications, this was not what he had in mind. He was supposed to be the treasured assistant of someone important. He just wanted to earn enough to live in an apartment, instead of a broom closet with plumbing. But he’s standing in front a display of Cheez Whiz and seriously contemplating his budget; he concludes it’s probably too much to ask.

His cracked phone screen, smudged with shiny fingerprints, reads 3:47 already. He’s supposed to be sleeping fitfully under the sympathetic eyes of his Daredevil poster. Maybe clubbing with his only two friends. He sighs, snatching bags of pretzels and boxes of pizza pockets off shelves with the detached precision of someone who knows exactly what they can’t afford. He’s using one of two grocery carts available, the one with the Hello Kitty sticker that’s missing half its head. He knows the other one has a wheel that sticks and makes an unpleasant sound.

His life is unpleasant enough.

He pays and leaves, blinks away fuzz from fluorescent bulbs, sighs down at his ratty, reusable tote. The only green inside is a family-sized bag of lime Tostitos. He turns down the alley, a shortcut for an already short walk. It’s not as scary as it could be, lined with dim streetlights that stoop like specters to haunt away the impossibly inky blackness of the night. He takes a couple dragging steps, trips over his frayed shoelace, and catches himself against the the side of the store. He braces his back against it and squints down at his fallen food.

An errant pack of ramen gives a pitiful crunch, dried noodles crushed under the polished black boot of the man who is suddenly standing in front of him, steadying him with a palm placed on his shoulder, fingers gripping lightly. The cold of them seeps; the pressure of them calms. The man is looking him straight in the eyes with his, glossy and catlike and smudged with black. His cheekbones are high. He’s wearing skinny black jeans and a billowy black shirt, top buttons undone to expose collarbones sharp as canines. “Hi,” he whispers, and, “you’re beautiful.” The words have more weight than the man’s hand, than his heady gaze. Ronan wants to believe him so, so badly.

So he tips towards the man, who doesn’t complain, only takes more of his weight. His smile is wide and his teeth are white and he smells like spices and tea. Maybe, Ronan thinks as the man’slipssuddenly touch his neck like the press of a rose petal. Maybe he deserves this: the touch of a beautiful man. The touch of anyone at all. Ronan closes his eyes as the man bites down lightly, just a tease. Ronan hopes briefly for a bruise, for some proof to prod later, squinting into his tiny bathroom mirror. Then he’s not hoping, just feeling a mind-wiping pleasure he wanted to be lost in forever.

And then the man is pulling back and spitting and saying, “You taste disgusting.”

Ronan rears back, more at the loss of the sensation than the words, which he processes slowly. He turns them inside, feels reality. He just finished a shift, and he tastes of the salt of sweat and fries. He rubs at his neck self-consciously, registers a slippery burning. “Did you just…bite me?” His voice comes out small. “Yeah, and I regret it. What’s wrong with your blood? You dying?” Ronan feels the familiar, nauseating stab of inferiority. He tries to bandage it, summons a sharp tone and some anger instead, because it leaves less of a hole. “There’s nothing wrong with me, asshole! I bet I’m fucking delicious!”

He can’t quite make himself make out the expression on the man’s lovely face, but he thinks it must be twisted. “Yeah, no. Trust me, you taste like shit.” He doesn’t bother with a tone, just says it like truth. The man drags his hand across his mouth and shudders, then turns his back and starts to walk away. As Ronan listens to the fading footsteps, he realizes. “I’m anemic…” he says quietly, mostly to himself. The man shows no reaction, doesn’t hear or doesn’t care, just leaves Ronan slumped against the wall to count his breaths until they are steady. The night deepens, drying like blood around him.