#perhaps just my mood

[gillianthecat]

Scream! Long Time No See and Dom take place in the same universe.

I was wondering why that silly moment with the condom was in Long Time No See. It didn't connect with anything else in that show, but i guess it was like a little teaser, MCU style.

[hana-bobo-finch]

Shoutout to this draft I made a couple hours ago when I suddenly had an epiphany for how I could fix a part of my story and I was so excited that the only way I could express it is to write whatever this is but I couldn’t post it because I didn’t have internet

also it got marked as mature for some reason

[palukoo]

anyone else dreaming of manderley??

[fluffs-n-stuffs]

"Cuhut it out- you guys!" "Nu-uh, not until you're all perked up first! You don't want those gym challengers meetin' with an ol' mopey leader, do ya?" "Whitney's right, dear friend. No need to hide that beautiful smile of yours, alright?~"

What it takes to cheer up Johto's beloved ghost boy 👻💕

[mad-hunts]

[halcyoncyrus]

When Abbot said "I protected you from a world that preys on your kind." uh huh please elaborate.

I know he probably just meant that Johnny was soft and weak but every part of my brain is like!! that's an autistic queer man right there.

[dykedvonte]

More Benny/main three chairmen HCs? 🥺

I like can't remember what I've already said so if some repeat pls don't be mad:

Tommy occasionally thinks of trying to branch out industry wise and maybe do a tour but he's paranoid about leaving Vegas

None of them really picked up chems before the Strip. It's not a taboo but getting body issues or withdrawal while having to wander around the Mojave wastes is not bueno.

Swank is well liked by the other casinos even if he doesn't care for them. He's always cordial mainly cause he's scared of being killed or cooked by the other two

Benny has very nice handwriting. He can mimic script but he can't read it.

Tommy practically lives in the theater due to how busy he always is and it's kinda treated as a separate establishment. House sends messages to him (not Ben or Swank) about its entertainers

Honestly, if Benny had told them sooner they may have helped him but at the same time they would've been pissed he's already back on his bullshit

Swank misses the old days the most and Tommy the least. His only complaint is the songs don't hit the same as they did with outside acoustics.

Swank, Tommy, and Benny have matching tattoos from the Boot Rider days that signified they were like a set scouting team (Pls don't ask of what I am still ironing that out)

Any ending where Benny is killed Swank mourns as I feel they were super close. Tommy isn't indifferent but he always half-joked Benny's ambition would lead him to an early grave.

That table at lunch where you can hear them talking super loud and it's all the juiciest gossip but they don't care cause it's not about them

Tallest is Swank shortest is Benny

They are loyal to the Chairmen and follow House's instructions but if House did catch Benny and want him brought in they would've helped him escape

Tommy lost his eye from a cazadore attack. I do not think I have to explain what happened (also a big reason he is least nostalgic)

Only Tommy is good at gambling, Benny bluffs too much and Swank never trusts his own hands

All their suits are gaudy and they only act like Benny's is the worst cause he has copies. Swank has an atrocious pinstripe suit and Tommy's is like chromatic. Eye sores, all of them

They are wary of House and Benny's relationship cause while Benny doesn't notice House's weird sentiments about him they do. It's little things about how Benny mentions House compares him to a son and successor and how much stress he puts the Tops under. They prefer House's silence to his usual "doting" just cause it's less weird and Benny seems more himself when he's not actively checking in with House

Benny trusts their judgement a lot more than he'd ever let on and a lot of his choices as the Head of the Chairmen come from taking their little comments into consideration

Uhh i hope this is adequate. I had to lock into NV head space sense I'm jumping around the games and franchise lore.

[toadallytickles]

o h man really wishing tonight I had someone A Ler to hang out with tie me to the bed and tickle me senseless and keep me company, I’m high and so lee and want attention 🥺

[flashnthunder]

baberoe priest kink- hello yes please i need this!!!!

(thank you for taggin me <3)

Willow Boughs and Wanting

(mildly nsfw under the cut)

He’s pushed back into the pew, and he goes without much fight. From his position now, Babe is half looming over him. The light through the windows makes his hair even more red, like a halo of fire consuming him. Babe doesn’t leave him to think for too long, slowly straddling himself over his lap until his knees are on either side of Eugene’s legs. He’s still taller like that, looking down at Eugene’s face when he tips his head back.

“I gotta tell you, Father, you’ve made it a helluva time sitting in on your services,” Babe says, and there’s a hint of a smile there that’s swallowed in something more serious. Babe leans down so close that their lips almost touch. He plays it like a waiting game and Eugene is the one to blink first. He doesn’t know who closes the gap first, but they’re kissing and Babe’s hands are on his shoulders.

If there had been a halo of fire around Babe, it’s going to cover him next, spread its fire like a curious flame licking up around dry wood. It dries the muggy air out of him and brings him closer to something real and solid. They kiss until they’re spending more time pulling away to breathe a shared exhale of the same air.

“It just ain’t right keeping you squirreled away in here all by your lonesome,” Babe murmurs, and Gene doesn’t have time to think about what he means before Babe lets himself settle further down in his lap. Only by sheer will does he keep his hands from grabbing him, either to push him away or drag him down he doesn’t know. Babe looks him in the eye, slow and deliberate in his gaze and grinds down onto his lap. Eugene can’t bite back the noise he makes, something choked off and high that escapes his throat.

“Edward, you can't be doing that,” he means it to sound more of a warning than it does. Instead it comes more like a hurried question.

“What's it gonna take to kill that? Need to know me a little more biblically before you call me the right name?” Babe asks, and the smile from earlier is back. He grinds his hips against Eugene, dropping his head to his shoulder for a moment. He nudges Eugene’s head back, kissing right above his white collar where his throat dips with each swallow.

“Want me to stop calling you by your first name, maybe? You prefer Father Roe if we're being formal like?” He rocks into him again, pulling back to kiss along his jaw. He can feel the blood in his cheeks, hot and thruming underneath his skin. Babe winds his arms around his neck, his eyes falling closed when he leans his head to the side and hips still moving.

"Edward," he tries again, and his voice has found no more strength the longer he waits. Babe's eyes come open again at that, and just as suddenly as they'd ended up together he pulls back. Eugene feels something akin to fear flush through him, suddenly wanting to pull him back down.

He doesn't go far, Babe sinks to his knees in front of him, slower than should be possible with how fast everything else seems to be happening to him. Eugene can’t get a good enough grip on the pew under his hands him to steady himself. There’s a wicked look Babe gets now, and he runs his hands down the outside of Eugene's legs, catching halfway down his shin and holding.

“Awful hard, like I was saying. Supposed to be listening and you’re up there, looking like all a’this,” Babe’s hands move back up again to catch his hips, squeezing just a little. Eugene digs his nails into the pew, wishing the wood would splinter under his grip. He presses until it hurts, tilting his head up and screwing his eyes closed.

“Figured yous would be used to seeing somebody down on their knees like this,” Babe’s grip tightens. He pulls him forward a little, pushing Eugene to choose between letting go of his grip on the old wood or letting his hips be moved forward till his back is almost arched.

“No, I ain’t, it’s not- I never,” his voice comes out in more of a stutter than he had expected. Babe’s grin grows at that. Just as slowly as he’d sunk to his knees before, he leans forward till his lips hover about an inch away from the dark fabric. Despite the layers, Eugene feels a hot flush run down his neck knowing that if Babe looked he would probably be able to see him getting hard.

“You good and sure about that? Don’t wanna take my confession like this?” Babe asks, and there's not a prayer in the world that comes to him now.

[tswwwit]

I would love, even if its just its just brief summaries, to know the different thoughts going through bills head throughout the last smut. (mainly when he got the text and when dipper starts just blurting out thoughts and ideas bc i think those moments would be fun to see)

Imagine you're having the shittiest day at work. You're gritting your teeth and hanging onto it by your fingernails, knowing that eventually dealing with this absolutely idiotic, waffling, overstuffed, condescending dipshit of a client will be done with, you'll charge him out the nose for your services - which will probably be, like a hundred dollars, the way this is going! What bullshit. At least afterwards, you can collapse onto the bed and complain to your spouse about it. Which you have been doing, actually, waiting for a decent excuse to bail or check out early.

Then you get a text. And it's your partner saying they got you a brand new console, your favorite pizza - Oh! And a million bucks in untraceable cash - but you might have to kick your shitty client in the nuts so hard his eyes pop out. Does that sound... okay? No pressure or anything.

The reason Bill was a minute later than expected is because even he needed a moment. It was the sheer whiplash from going from Shit to Fucking Amazing.

[16th-of-a-twigg]

personal take: I think the tardis interior is bland and boring and she no longer is a character/set with character but instead just an ikea catalogue with her sterile lights and clean surfaces...

[sodrippy]

mental illness will have you asking normal people 'so how many moods do you have during a day? like one? all day? ok cool. yeah no me too me too for sure'

[wavesoutbeingtossed]

I have thoughts about the TTPD speculation/two years/loneliness/sharing feelings through songs train but I'm putting them under a cut because. Yeah.

OK, so I'm giving a warning:

I'm talking about BTTWS, but NOT about the speculation/inspiration behind it. Just about the feelings in it and the Midnights of it all/the idea that sharing the difficult things brings comfort/companionship. So getting that out of the way so we can remove that part of the discourse out of it.

Regardless of whatever the inspiration/event behind BTTWS may be, whether it's about a loved one or personal, I've long felt that its inclusion on Midnights, an album about things that have kept her up at night, is significant in the feelings it portrays.

For instance, we can be fairly certain that Taylor wasn't actually turning in Scooter B. to the FBI and conspiring with his ex-wife to bring him down (or was she?) in Vigilante Shit, just as we can safely guess that she probably did actually pick up that pebble in Wicklow that reminded her of a peaceful time in Sweet Nothing. The line between fiction/reality, personal vs. narrative matters less on Midnights in this case than the feelings she was expressing in the songs, which are very personal and truthful. The revenge fantasy in Vigilante Shit is her working through her anger over having her masters sold and how she's fought hard to have the last laugh over someone who is a sworn enemy. Sweet Nothing is her reflecting on the dichotomy of her (presumed) quiet home life she felt was safe and the noise of the outside world. (Now, we might speculate on why she was ruminating on this, but that's another story.)

So with that preamble out of the way, BTTWS's inclusion in the tracklist I feel is just as important, again regardless of the inspiration behind it or her personal connection to it. Even if it is a song about someone other than herself, including it as the only "not personal/not diaristic" song on an album as ostensibly self-reflective as Midnights would stick out if that were thecase, though obviously it's her album so she can do whatever she wants and could have her own reasons. (Just like she included Ronan on Red and Soon You'll Get Better on Lover about similar themes, it could just be a tribute to a loved one.) But given all the thematic arcs and parallels on Midnights, I do feel like it's there to include a specific set of feelings being processed, even if the origin on the feelings may or may not be her own. (I'm trying to be really sensitive in my word choices here, hope they make sense.)

BTTWS is a song about loss and grief, and specifically the fallout of an event outside of her/the narrator's control. The person in the song has nothing to turn to to deal with their pain: no faith to guide them, no wisdom to tell them everything will be alright. Throughout the song there is a pervasive sense of isolation: everything is over, they're living without something that was once theirs but suddenly was not. It captures the fog and confusion of living through a painful event without having any way to process. She even says from the start that, "no words appear before me in the aftermath," which for someone like Taylor who has stated over and over how writing is literally how she processes her life would be the ultimate reflection of the depths of her hurt.

(To be clear I do not think this is a song about a breakup whatsoever: IMO it clearly is not about a relationship dissolution of any kind. I just think that the feelings of grief and loneliness in the song may have felt relevant to whatever she was going through during the time the album was coalescing in 2021-22.)

Knowing what we know now about at the very least the period between 2021-2023, Taylor was going through a time of significant difficulty in her life behind the scenes, which is how The Tortured Poets Department came to be, right on the heels of her completing Midnights sometime in early 2022. She has said herself that making TTPD was a lifeline, that she had to keep writing to deal with whatever it was that she was experiencing and going through. And as I posted about earlier today, she's also said repeatedly on tour that not only is writing about her feelings how she processes her pain and loneliness, but that then sharing that music with fans brings her great comfort because it makes her feel less lonely to know people understand and relate to what she's going through.

And we know that she has self-edited her albums over the years (including Midnights) to protect herself and perhaps even the subjects of her songs, which we have seen with the inclusion of the vault/bonus tracks in the re-records and on Midnights. Obviously some of these reasons are logistical -- album was too long, cut songs sounded too much like others, maybe she or her producers felt the ones that were originally chosen were stronger, narrative or sonic cohesion, etc. -- but with what we've seen over the last few years, these songs also filled in the lines of the stories being told and reframed the narrative being told.

Nowhere is that clearer than with You're Losing Me, for example. It's pretty obvious why it was held back: presumably she wouldn't want to release a song about a relationship at its breaking point when she was still actively in the relationship. Yet as soon as the relationship ended, she released it, we can only assume because of her realization that sharing the music and having people respond to it validates her feelings and makes her feel embraced, as it were. Then with the announcement of TTPD and how it's been brewing for essentially the intervening period between when YLM was written and now, we can also surmise that these songs will be dealing with feelings she also felt the need to hold back for whatever reason at the time, but has now decided should be out there so she can feel more whole.

So coming back to BTTWS, it being included on Midnights the way that it was strikes me as a form of sharing feelings that may have been too difficult to process. Again, not implying I have any insight into what the origin of the song is about, or imposing my own beliefs onto her, or that she was sending some sort of secret message with its inclusion! But thematically, BTTWS deals with an intense loss and feeling completely unmoored and alone as a result, which is present in her other work. And that the dreams the narrator once held have gone up in smoke, leaving her reeling about what's to come next. She's cut off from the world because of the event, unable to speak about or grasp what has happened. Similar feelings are also explored in You're Losing Me for instance, and even Dear Reader (not to mention on past albums like evermore, this is me trying, arguably hoax, etc.). Just reading context clues from TTPD and her surprise song choices of late, I don't think it's outrageous to presume some of those emotions are going to be present on the new album as well.

So this is just a long-winded way of saying, I feel like the sense of loss, confusion and uncertainty about the future likely resonated with both what she had gone through in the past, and the story as a whole she was trying to tell on Midnights. And while the origin may or may not be personal or relevant to the new story she's going to tell, I also feel like these same kinds of themes are going to be present on TTPD because they're so important for her to share. (I could even mention that the response to BTTWS may even provide evidence that people sharing their experiences in general brings comfort to those going through it, but that may be veering too far into parasocial "why did Taylor do X" speculative territory.) She sings about these kinds of all-consuming losses so eloquently and mindfully that I know the new album is going to be an absolute gut punch.

(not being self-promotional but I delved a little deeper into the Midnights 3am tracks including this one a few months ago so it's why it's top of mind and why the connections and thematic parallels are so resonant to me lately.)

[unproduciblesmackdown]

among the boundless billions zaniness like laugh track as it definitely has that moment of expressing "rolling my eyes as The Left makes a kerfuffle of Acting like they have a stance as a veneer over the true belief that [xyz] is cool & chill actually" like what, approximate 0.000% chance wendy isn't, as usual, given the Objective Stance of "yeah yeah ohh we are cancelling involved parties talking about how we Don't watch this But. we all love this damn epic movie & already have it memorized so shut the fuck up, kids today" like. don't wanna really delve into how much billions thinks taylor or anyone is "really" trans / nonbinary like not too much benefit of the doubt in this material including what does provide info abt that specifically

& the general like [head in hands. what do you think any of this could possibly be about (you're the one that made your show at all about Power)] of "yes, it's bad/wrong to be someone that someone has done something to / victim of something" like that to be anti misogyny All Women Must Be Epic Winners b/c there's something to be proved: that they don't Deserve to be victims (of misogyny), not taken as a Given. while when we see some epic winner men stepping on other men (who need not all be guaranteed Winners so as to say misogyny is wrong), that's often Good, well beyond any assumption that various forms of basic disrespect / violation / patterns of emergent/entrenched power difference as Bad (for being things done to people, not for there being people they're being done to), & generally billions has to take an extra step when ppl get shitted on & tell us the Specific Cases when it was undeserved actually & someone was being mean to a specific person who didn't deserve that. & the specific cases when hey guess it wasn't that bad(tm) or when hey It's Okay that you're someone something was done to, in this case. & tell us what we were supposed to know all along like when someone who something was being done to (wrong Of Them, whether b/c they inherently deserve it no matter what, &/or b/c they failed to be someone who could make it Impossible to do anything to them, which, how do you do that besides being The Authority / Superior yourself, exactly? nonrhetorically? what if the in group vs out group / fascism / authoritarianism protected Me?) was actually being treated Too Well b/c ah well the abuse meant you were getting any attention, maybe it meant you were claimed as any superior's property, maybe it meant you weren't Already disposed of, as all Losers were in the end, You're Welcome.

obviously referring to winston where it's spelled out all the abuse towards him was deserved, & More than he deserved in the case of rian having more access & taking advantage of that, all for billions' enjoying its own sendoff there of, again, maximizing violation & violence short of [real violence is physical & leaves bruises / draws blood / Literally kills] which would be distasteful in general But doesn't it make wags look like the winner & winston the loser is that the former's completely unrelated completely impersonal ego blow gets way amplified taken out on winston, the most vulnerable recurring character when spyros as [first & ultimate Everyone Hates Him role] is more entrenched in there & billions still magnanimously pities tuk, as it does winston too, just not quite as much. again that like completely surface level realized power fantasy of forcing the mirror up to the Inferior so they're like nooo my inferiorityyyy & in doing so like, the projection in that lmao, we get it re: the valuing of & need(tm) for such Power Tripping & Reaffirming My Superiority & My Ego Restored; Everyone Claps like good god. & then for all ben & tuk are the slightly softer Two Too Nice Boys duo to the rian & winston quant duo, also like too nice i guess but not as much, ben is in charge of tuk but Any instance of rian being in charge of winston outstrips them in that "yay interpersonal abuse" dynamic, like then in the end billions may be like "yeah it's possible to be mean to them unlike how being mean to winston is actually Nice b/c he deserves everything he gets, we only vicariously enjoy it vs Feeling Bad for tuk & ben sometimes (still magnanimously & it's Not That Bad / just goofin)" like ben & tuk still Fail by not being people it's impossible to do anything to. & not Exceptions who anyone is really being Too Mean to. like if they were women, in which case, no problem surely with a "positive" kind of victim blaming where there is something Inherent that Will be victimized so hey how about to cancel that out there's this special Paternal Protection you Need always, Or Else? :) but instead they are men who are asian & is ben gay & w/tuk & winston nobody mentions glasses or fatness but billions doesn't really do much or very in depth textual mentioning of Anything, even w/nonzero mention that there may be gender & race in this world. a gay man, once. no disability. we just Know who are the inferiors who deserve it when they're treated inferiorly, or if they don't, they start deserving it when they fail to stop/avoid it, but if you start mentioning the factors behind who we all totally agree is inferior like whoa nobody was Saying any of that? being the real agent of oppression on the basis of the factors only You spelled out, much? nonbinary? i never say anything about the Gender Binary when i'm subscribing to it, sounds like You've created & enforced it. obfuscation & deflection onto [so Just Normal nobody has to label, explain, or argue it] couldn't serve a purpose & protect the existing power differences as they are. maybe You're the problem? perhaps you brought it upon yourself & now you're causing too much trouble standing up for yourself while everyone else's criticism is laser focused on you as the prior & continuing negative actions done to you are taken as a given / unquestioned / covertly protected to overtly encouraged?

anyway so wild if the Completely Normal(tm) Victim Blaming is uncritically recreated & oft embraced for "if you're watching this & don't wish you were axe / find him appealing" [billions as a sequence of vicarious power trips] purposes in this series....but a bit wild considering like this is your multiseason show that wasn't just purporting to be those power trips for [enough demographic & apparently specific personal tastes overlap w/creators] & was at all purporting to question the matters of power at play in the material, or yknow, at least to not be completely superficial material while said material is textually & thematically all about power difference being leveraged, how, the consequences, & so on. thus i will have to intermittently talk about it forever like this like lord unbelievable. & the funny little & sometimes less funny less little characters it has trapped in there so that those of us who were never meant to be in the audience can be cursed with this knowledge. like i have some feedback. "imagine not victim blaming" & "imagine adjusting your perspective can go beyond superficial layers added to politely defer to some other ppl while they're present but really like cmon do they deserve that. am i not just saying what we're allll thinking"

[bright-and-burning]

top three funniest work messages ever received

[solar-halos]

did you really think i forgot to post for moodboard monday? well, that’s because i (almost) did. this is my first non-thg themed moodboard but since sissy from the umbrella academy has been on my mind lately, i present a moodboard of a fic i did of her called short shorts and stolen liquor (there’s nothing i wouldn’t give her)