#perfect ellen hopkins

[femmeboyfatle]

[media-therapist]

How Can’t Catch Me Now lyrics fit parts of Perfect (Sequel to Ellen Hopkins’ Impulse)

“You’ll see my face in every place” = Cara mentioning Connor’s suicide; Kendra being her brother’s ex gf; my headcanon that Cara sees Connor in Kendra; her haunting Sean after she accused him of raping her

“But you can’t catch me now” = Cara and Sean’s breakup

“Yeah, you think that you got away” = Sean stalking Cara post-breakup and going as far to expose her

“The bitter taste of my fury/And all of the messes you made” = Cara accusing Sean of raping her

“The months will pass/You’ll feel it all around” = Cara’s struggle to recover from her brother’s death

“I’m here, I’m there, I’m everywhere” = Cara’s mention of the carpet where Connor’s body laid with blood on it; Cara (presumably) haunting Sean after the break-up

“Oh, you think I’m gone ‘cause I left” = Connor’s suicide being mentioned, as it was in Impulse

[murfpersonalblog]

My 2 Cents on Nosferatu 2024 - 8/10 (Spoilers!)

I really liked it! 👏

Disclaimer: my vampire GOAT is Gary Oldman's Dracula. Bram Stoker's Dracula is PEAK (camp) gothic horror cinema IMO.

Nosferatu 2024 eliminates the camp entirely, giving a much more emotionally & nauseatingly intense version of Dracula, by leaning HEAVILY into The Exorcist. This was less a movie about vampires, and more one about Gothic period anxieties about demon possession, mental illness, and plague.

Lily-Rose Depp as Ellen stole the whole dang show, PERFECTION. Her seizures and ravings & outright possessions were WILD to witness. I like her story, being a mentally ill lonely little girl shut up all alone and just praying for companionship, but getting more than you asked for when the Devil answered and not God.

But I REALLY found myself feeling SO DANG bad--not for for Ellen/Mina, and not for Thomas/Jonathan either. For Friedrich/Arthur & Anna/Lucy. 😭

Like, you just FEEL the emotional/mental weight on Friedrich, as he has to watch over his missing best friend's wife who's got awful seizures & sleepwalking, religious hysteria, and grieving over her missing husband--on top of you already having 2 kids visibly running you ragged, and a heavily pregnant wife--on top of your career as a shipman consulted for your expertise in the middle of a citywide plague cause by a Plague Ship that just entered the harbor loaded with a billion rats that then eat your wife dang near alive. Yeah, I'd've kicked Ellen & Thomas outta my house, too! My guy went full Heathcliffe in the end, it was a really nice nod to the Gothic genre.

I was taken aback by Orlock--I was (stupidly) expecting Nosferatu to look like he did in 1922; I never expected him to have hair! 😅But it was a pleasant surprise.

I love his fangs, and unless my eyes decieve me, he's got the same burned circle on his brow that Mina Harker did in Dracula--but instead of it purifying her vampirism, his is the Mark of Cain from when he was a human alchemist/occultist who sold his soul.

And they just loved showing this dude in the buff, full frontal peen & all, his body just grotesque AF--I love that he's half rotted & ghoulish like he's riddled with syphilis or some other STD: hence all the plague themes tying in with him as an incubus haunting Ellen all her life.

So his design was ok, but it's not a silhouette that will ever stick as strongly as Lugosi, 1922!Nosferatu, and ofc Oldman's wig in Dracula.

Herr Knock/Renfield was a shockingly good surprise, too, omg. He killed it, that dude was F R E A K I N G me out. Providence!

Willem Dafoe as Professor Von Franz/Van Helsing was strong, but Anthony Hopkins in Dracula was better IMO. But then again, Hopkins was THE campiest of camp in Dracula, with a much bigger/hammier performance; while Dafoe was far....saner? So it's not his fault.

Complaints

I have a lot of small nitpicks with this movie, and 1 BIG complaint.

Germany? 👎

NGL I wish this movie "felt" more Eastern European.

Aside from the brief segment where Thomas is in the peasant village (in Transylvania???) and spies on their rituals to kill vampires by stabbing corpses, there's no real sense of where this story takes place. Sure, there's a Herr thrown in every now & then, but they could've/should've really leaned into giving this movie more of a unique vibe, separating it from every. other. Gothic. movie. set. in. effing. Britain.

My biggest complaint is centered around accents. It took me a good 30 minutes to stop laughing every time all these British-sounding actors spoke. The kids yelling Papa! Papa! 100x had me forgetting I was even watching a show set in Germany. 🤦

Then they had the nerve to cast Dr. Wilhelm as one of THE most recognizable-sounding British actors (my inner Final Fantasy 16 fangirl was like THAT'S CID! 🤣) Yanked me right out of the experience.

Orlock? 👎

But my BIGGEST complaint about this movie, so sorry to say this, was Count Orlock himself. Bill Skarsgård has great screen presence, he's scary AF, and his deep vocal register was pitch perfect--the wheezing & growling he did was SO DANG GOOD.

But I COULD NOT UNDERSTAND A EFFING WORD ORLOCK SPOKE IN ENGLISH. My closed captions were rough, where it just couldn't pick up everything he was saying properly. I wish they'd kept him speaking Dacian/Romanian the whole time, so at least we'd have the built-in subtitles.

It's a real problem when the villain is such a central focus, but you can't follow along with his motivations or machinations, because you can't understand what he's even saying. I had no idea that the "land contract" was actually divorce papers Orlock tricked Thomas into signing, until I read the effing plot synopsis online after I'd already seen the frikkin movie. That plot twist would've been amazing to get while I was watching the movie, but I couldn't understand what Orlock was even saying to Thomas or Ellen!

And Orlock's scene/chemistry with Ellen was really good! (The parts I could understand, of course.) I just knew there was something going on with the sack of gold, and how they had 3 days to stop him. I'd assumed Ellen putting on the wedding dress at the end was just symbolic, a la Dracula's Bride, not that it was literally her agreeing to divorce Thomas and marry Orlock--till death do us part!

So I was pissed that I missed the biggest plot point in the whole movie, because I didn't catch when Orlock said it with that thick rolling accent. I legit feel it robbed me of what would've been a much better experience, when I was already having a great time watching the movie.

[bunnidid-reviews]

DID book Reviw - Identical by Ellen Hopkins

Facts:

Date of publication: 2008

Fiction or Nonfiction: fiction

Was there a diagnosis of DID? Yes, near the end

Was the person with DID presented as evil for having DID? No, just a flawed and struggling individual

Major trigger warning list:

Alcoholism

Drug use

Incestuous rape by the father (mostly non-explicit but implied enough to be obvious)

Lots more uncomfy incest things (kissing, wanting to see his daughter in attractive clothes/getting changed)

Denial from the mother

CSEM being made (mentioned much later and not very explicit)

Bulimia (lots of binging and purging)

Grooming by a teacher

Inebriated sex with fawning into it

A dubiously consenting BDSM scene? (Nonexplicit)

Self harm

Suicide attempt and idiation

Abusers being in positions of power

There may be more that I’m not remembering. Shits fucked.

Subjective Review(this is how I felt about it)

Personal triggering scale from 1 to 10 (1 being not triggering at all, 10 being a badly overwhelming experience that might cause personal harm): ???5-7? (Unsure if its very triggering or not because of my current sense of being disconnected from most things. Still its def not been the worst/most difficult ive read, and its not explicit)

Personal relatability scale from 1 to 10 (1 being unrelatable, 10 being OMG THAT’S ME!): 6

Personal avoidance scale from 1 to 10(1 being eager to get on with it, 10 being impossible to finish): 3 (extremely easy to just keep reading, part of its probably because of the easy format)

My interpretation of the media(Includes spoilers):

I went into this with trepidation because the cover looks like it would be an edgy triller type of book, so I was half expecting the evil alter trope. This is especially common when its ‘just two’ alters, because the assumptions are made around the ‘split personality’, which is a term thats usually used negatively, associated with evil alters or used as an insult, etc.

And it can sorta seem like that, especially on the surface premise of ‘one of them is ruining their life!!’, which is also how this book seemed the be advertised. Except.. neither of them are trying to ruin their life really, they’re both coping just as poorly as eachother, and surviving just as well as they can. Does that involve self destruction? Majorly, but I read it more as trying to do anything she can to get out of the situation she’s in.

the premise:

Kaeleigh and Raeanne are 16-year-old identical twins, who live the idyllic, picturesque american household: their mother is a politician rising through the ranks, and their father is a judge. They’re both incredibly well-respected and have a lot of reach in their community. Their family looks perfect on the outside..

But is not so pretty just inside. Both parents are alcoholic in their own rights, influencing their daughters to take after them to cope through living together. Mom’s barely home and never wants to be there when she is. And dad.. controls every aspect of their lives through his unpredictable temperament and drunkenness. He’s lonely and pathetic and feels beat down by his cold wife, so the only person he can turn to for comfort is his daughter(s)

Which he does, frequently. He’s been raping Keileigh since she was 9, after a near-fatal car accident that broke her mother’s ability to feel love. Since then he’s been using Keileigh in this sick, twisted way, and controlling her so she’d never get away.

Keileigh and Raeanne’s means of coping are intense, but they’re not as opposite to eachother as it may seem. Keileigh is binging and cutting and shutting down and fawning. She’s in denial and always has a sense of being crushed under the weight of her father’s control.

Raeanne purges and seeks out her vices in getting high and having risky sex with guys who will never love her or treat her right, the more dangerous the better. She fawns just as much as Keileigh actually, just in a more subtle ‘this is what I deserve anyway/it’s too late to say no’ kinda way.

Both of the girls use alcohol and pain medications as a means to get themselves to sleep or get through the day.

As the book goes on, and the election draws near, the intensity and frequency of the abuse is driving Keileigh and Raeanne further and further into their breaking point. They want it all to end already, especially when her mother wins the election and is fully out of the picture, and the grandparents start showing up mysteriously to uncover the past. Something they knew about, something the parents have tried so hard to hide.

It takes Keileigh’s suicide attempt to make Raeanne say enough is enough. She sneaks out to meet with her grandfather on her father’s side to learn the story of what happened to make her father this way. It turned out he’d been the victim of CSEM, and deeply traumatized from the abandonment of his alcoholic mother.

This diddddnt super help her crisis, Raeanne couldn’t have just gone back into it all. She attempts to escape at least mentally with one of her drug hookups Ty, who likes sex rough and forcibly consenting. The drug trip is hitting her badly already when Keighleigh’s boyfriend shows up, mixing her and Raeanne’s world. Everything all together is enough to fracture the heavy wall between the twins, and..

All along they were one person. Raeanne was Keileigh’s twin sister who died in that fateful car crash, and from the trauma of that and being raped so soon after, she split off an introject of her sister to be a step outside herself.

The sisters wake up in the hospital, having to stay until the drugs and the withdrawl wear off safely. She ends up telling the doctor about her symptoms and shes able to get diagnosed with Dissociative Identity Disorder.

But how do you go home after that? In memories that came back, it turned out that her mother knew all along and intentionally turned a blind eye. Nowhere is safe.

It turned out that the grandmother knew and was scared into silence by the father’s influences. She had witnessed sexual abuse long before the accident, making her turn to alcoholism to try to forget what she saw, to cope. She showed up in the end to make ammends, and Keileigh and Raeanne were able to go home with her.

The ending is bittersweet but hopeful. Six months in, the girls are getting therapy. They have a loving boyfriend who doesn’t know the whole story yet, but he’s endlessly supportive. The father put himself in rehab and basically out of reach of his daughter. The mother works in DC now, shes not really in the picture as much but that’s probably for the better.

-

For a story told in poems, there was so much that was said in so few words. It was really hard-hitting and felt like a realistic approach of what happens when you’re coping with incest, just how much isolation it entails, how much control goes into it.

Like I said before, the sisters are a mess. But she’s also 16 and still getting raped at home, and literally no one was there for her, or at least allowed to be there for her until nearly the end. It’s heartwrenching really, and the whole time I was going Yeah, of course they’re like this, what else can they do?? It hits just very very honestly, and I don’t feel like any of it was written with pure disdain for the victims in the story, even if the tone could be very dry and callous in the point-of-views.

The poetry was really good too. The ‘chapter ends’ where the switches were happening had a very distinct way of formatting it, so there were two poems on opposite pages using some of the same words, with the spaced apart words revealing the truth of what they were both feeling. It was a fun read and very very well executed.

I don’t remember if I’ve read from this author before, but I feel like she handled a story about DID and incest and coping really well. It’s not a light read, but I also couldn’t put it down.

What they got Right in my opinion:

Diagnosis of DID being called Dissociative Identity Disorder

The entire structure of isolation and power dynamics ensuring that incest could happen and not be spoken about felt scarily accurate

Loosing time was not always so black and white it seemed. Of course I’m just going off poems, but theres mentions of what the other twin is doing in reference to themselves (usually in Raeanne’s point of view)

Introjection of a real person felt very correct and not in some weird ‘the ghost of your sister lives within you’ kinda magical bullshit way. She is an introject. They dont use that word specifically but its really obvious

The fawning is so fucking real, man

Keileigh often feeling ‘miles away’ or spacing out frequently

Neither part was better or evil compared to eachother, they were both coping in very messy ways

The thing that got me to notice that it felt more like an alter thing than a sister thing was in this very subtle thing of, when Raeanne found that her ‘sister’ had started self harming, or had a suicide attempt, it wasn’t like.. a normal person’s level of concern like ‘oh my god i could loose my sibling’ as much as it was this almost callous way of treating one’s self the day after deciding to live or having a major self harm episode. Just sigh, clean it up, forcibly make yourself carry on. Am I making any sense? It just felt very much like taking care of yourself vs another person.

The ending not being sunshine and rainbows happy ending, everyone wins. Idk, if you read my review for Pieces of Me, you’ll notice I was pretty upset about the fact that everything worked out extremely well, over the top idyllic. When we all know that healing is actually really messy, its not comfortable, not everyone’s on the same page and not everyone can safely know about the DID always. This felt very real to me

What they got Wrong in my opinion:

I think having full blackouts to the point of having an entirely different life from one another is pretty rare(if its not let me know, ive not heard of this happening much)

Umm I was a little disturbed by one of the healing things she had to go do was apologize to the teacher for leaning into him showing Way Too Much interest in her. The only goddamn reason he didn’t go through with it was because they could be caught?? That is the teachers responsibility, is it not????? Am I being too tumblr??? Am i missing something here???

I did not super understand the logic of Keileigh’s at work but Raeanne is going and doing drugs. How are they doin that, or is she very quick? Just little attempts to hide the big reveal didn’t super make sense to me

Would I reccomend this to someone with DID to read? Yes! But carefully, and keep in mind all the TWs. You might find it very relatable and idk if thats a good thing or not

Just so you know, there is a lot to this book that I didn’t talk about, a lot of little traumas that stacked up into it getting heavier. I just couldn’t possibly write about everything, so bear🧸 in mind if you read it yourself

[spookietrex]

I wanna add to this, I have to be kind to past me when doing this because past me used to read some fucked up shit. Past (teenage) me was obsessed with Ellen Hopkins. Great writer, writes a lot about teen issues, but not great for those with mental health issues imo. Especially impulse and perfect.

I have to remind myself that that is not who I am anymore and I'm not in that place anymore.

I am safe and my abusers can't harm me anymore. So yeah, I love revisiting those parts of myself but I try to do so with healthy things, including reading new children's fiction to help myself heal.

i love re-consuming media i used to love when i was younger. like wow! child me still is in me i am holding her hand and keeping her safe and doing her favorite things with her!!!!

[haveyoureadthispoll]

In Crank, Ellen Hopkins chronicles the turbulent and often disturbing relationship between Kristina, a character based on her own daughter, and the "monster," the highly addictive drug crystal meth, or "crank." Kristina is introduced to the drug while visiting her largely absent and ne'er-do-well father. While under the influence of the monster, Kristina discovers her sexy alter-ego, Bree: "there is no perfect daughter, / no gifted high school junior, / no Kristina Georgia Snow. / There is only Bree." Bree will do all the things good girl Kristina won't, including attracting the attention of dangerous boys who can provide her with a steady flow of crank.

[thebanishedreader]

Book Bans in Georgia

As of June 2023

Oryx and Crake by Margaret Atwood

Brief Summary: In a post-plague world, Jimmy - now known as Snowman - mourns the loss of his best friend Crake and their mutual love-interest, the beautiful Oryx. With the Children of Crake, Snowman embarks on a journey for answers through the post-apocalyptic hellscape created by capitalist brutality.

Banned from libraries as of June 2023, based on a formal challenge.

Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Blackwell's (UK)

Dime by E. R. Frank

Brief Summary: Dime, a teenaged girl drifting in the foster system, falls victim to a "family" that promises to care for her - so long as she brings back money by working the streets. Dime begins to realize her abuse and struggles to understand what to do to best protect herself.

Banned from libraries as of June 2023, based on a formal challenge.

Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Blackwell's (UK)

Perfect by Ellen Hopkins

Brief Summary: Four high school seniors face varying meanings of being "perfect"; for one, it's leaving behind a family whose strictness is driving her to suicidality, for another its taking whatever substances they can to feel good enough. A brutally riveting story of adolescent anxieties and the consequences of unrealistic expectations for success.

Banned from libraries as of June 2023, based on a formal challenge.

Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Blackwell's (UK)

Tilt by Ellen Hopkins

Brief Summary: Three teens struggling with hurting family lives and personal challenges are brought together by their parents' relationships; but as the teens grow older, their bonds through hardship bring them closer than they could have ever imagined.

Banned from libraries as of June 2023, based on a formal challenge.

Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Blackwell's (UK)

Statistics Source: Pen America

Support the American Library Association!

[elcomfortador]

Gimme a Break Transformed Into a Lesbian Perfect Strangers

“Joey’s First Crush” (January 28, 1987)

Few other shows changed as much as Gimme a Break, which began as a fish-out-of-water sitcom that had Nell Carter playing mom to three white girls in California but ended up with Nell and her best friend, Telma Hopkins’ Addy, co-parenting two white boys in New York. Minus the kids, it’s basically a female-female twist on Perfect Strangers, only they don’t get steady boyfriends. Perhaps in an effort to make the show seem less gay, they tossed in a happily married character… who was played by newcomer Rosie O’Donnell. This episode, which is the second of Gimme a Break’s outings to feature actual gay characters, showcases a lot of how this show ended up pretty damn gay.

… Now that I think about it, maybe the only sitcom that changed as much over its run was Ellen — and that’s pretty notable, right?

Listen to our previous Gimme a Break episodes.

Learn all about Betty and Barney Hill in the Monday Afternoon Movie episode about 1975’s The UFO Incident.

Watch:

Andy Gibb dueting with Nell Carter on Gimme a Break

Gimme a Break’s famous Motown medley

Rosie O’Donnell on Star Search

Listen now!

[thewierdbookworm]

Hello(; This is probably a weird ask but can you recommend any books that’ll make me (or anyone$ cry ? Lmao

Hi!! Not weird at all. If you haven’t yet, read Burned by Ellen Hopkins, that had me crying. It has a sequel called Smoke and it also gets you in your feelings 🥲

Another good one is I Am Not Your Perfect Mexican Daughter by Erika L Sanchez

Me Before You by Jojo Moyes.

Hope that helps!!!

[liznfin]

A perfect paper airplane.

We read Impulse by Ellen Hopkins a while back.

[gardenofbookworms]

week #45 recommendation: bee

Crank by Ellen Hopkins

▪︎ fiction free verse novel ▪︎

it’s quite literally a law—what goes up must come down. but how do you stay up, or at least delay the crash? answer: fly with the monster.

kristina met the monster on a trip to albuquerque. they were introduced by adam, the neighbor’s hot boyfriend, and she’s never been able to let go of its hand since. on that trip, kristina’s perfect track record is slashed apart and made new by kristina’s wilder, more enticing self—bree. she returns home to reno, not as ready to transition back to normal life as she thought. it’s been a month, but the monster is still watching her, taunting her, prompting her to do a toot, just a little one, with chase from the water park. if there was any chance before, there’s none now—kristina slips away from her family and old friends, opting for new ones that can supply her with crank. what brendan does is going to change her life, and kristina will wish she’d never been on her period that time in albuquerque.

▪︎

this might be a weird point to start off with, but i think one of the most realistic things in this book was kristina’s recurring periods. it might have just been setting up for that ending, but still—i liked how it was actually an inconvenience to her, and especially her having sex. past that, i like how her relationship with her mother was written with the free verse. by stripping all the unneeded words away, you’re really getting just whatever’s at the core (namely frustration). despite that, there’s a lot of uncertainty kristina has about coming clean to her family, and there’s this one scene in the kitchen where she comes really close. that make it or break it moment put me on edge.

[in-dire-read]

Perfect (Book Review)

Rating: 4.5⭐️/5⭐️

Information

Author: Ellen Hopkins

Genre: Young Adult Fiction

Page Number: 622

Summary

Ellen Hopkins' "Perfect" is a compelling exploration of the lives of four teenagers—Connor, Sean, Kendra, and Andre—each grappling with their struggles as they strive for a sense of perfection in a flawed world.

Thoughts

We explore the lives of four teenagers—Cara, Sean, Kendra, and Andre—whose stories intertwine as they each grapple with intense pressures to meet impossible standards. Cara faces the dual challenge of living up to her parents' high expectations while also trying to understand and accept her sexuality. Her journey is a poignant exploration of self-discovery and the quest for authentic acceptance.

Sean, on the other hand, battles the physical and emotional toll of steroid use in his desperate attempt to maintain his athletic performance. His storyline is a stark reminder of the dangers of prioritizing success over health and well-being, and the destructive consequences of succumbing to external pressures.

Kendra's narrative delves into the brutal realities of the modeling industry, where she contends with body image issues, eating disorders, and the upheaval of family turmoil. Her struggles highlight the relentless and often damaging pursuit of beauty and perfection, revealing the high cost of trying to conform to unrealistic standards.

Meanwhile, Andre fights for his passion for dance, a dream his parents disapprove of in favor of a more conventional and "successful" career path. His determination to follow his heart, despite familial disapproval, underscores the importance of pursuing one's true passions and the courage it takes to defy expectations.

Through their intertwined stories, "Perfect" reveals the profound impact of societal and familial pressures on their paths to self-acceptance. Each character's journey is a powerful testament to the resilience required to overcome these challenges and the importance of finding one's own path in the face of adversity.

[mischievovs]

Acrostic, Beat, Calligramme, Didactic, and Elegy.

Words are like the clay of the mind. We shape and build them into pieces that hold, depict, and contain human emotions and thoughts. One of the structures words build is poetry, a creative design with spirals of thought, the color of the soul, and the shape of a mind ever-changing. For example, in the Acrostic poem Elizabeth, Edgar Allan Poe conceptualizes the pursuit of Elizabeth by using every letter of her name to demonstrate his fixation on her. Nothing of language is in vain; every letter lends usage to emit love or what could be an obsession.

“Elizabeth, it surely is most fit

[Logic and common usage so commanding]

In thy own book that first thy name be writ,

Zeno and other sages notwithstanding;

And I have other reasons for so doing

Besides my innate love of contradiction;

Each poet - if a poet - in pursuing

The muses thro' their bowers of Truth or Fiction,

Has studied very little of his part,

Read nothing, written less - in short's a fool

Endued with neither soul, nor sense, nor art,

Being ignorant of one important rule,

Employed in even the theses of the school-

Called - I forget the heathenish Greek name

[Called anything, its meaning is the same]

"Always write first things uppermost in the heart."”

Similar to obsession, in Naked Lunch, William S. Burroughs depicts a loss of control. Every single thought of a junky is written down in the format of a novel that reads like a poem of modern civilization.

“Rube flips in the end, running through empty automat and subway stations, screaming. 'Come back, and follows his boy right into the East River, down through condoms and orange peels, mosaic of floating newspapers, down into the silent black ooze with gangsters in concrete, and pistols pounded flat to avoid the probing finger of prurient ballistic experts”

What he writes reads like a beat poem. He rejects the prude values of mass society and runs with poetic madness, creating a “jargon of the jazz world.” he is not constructing a perfect order- a bureaucratic notion and accepted idea of poetry, but rather holding up a mirror to the bear face of humanity, hopping from line to line, unwinding a rhyme in his written “madness.”

Every style of poem is a creative design. In Ellen Hopkins’s “Identical,” she utilizes poetry and the Calligramme technique to develop a story of two twins separated by a tragic accident- every page contains a poem with lines arranged into shapes depicting the escalating relationship between the protagonists.

She captures the scattering of minds and the similarities between the twins through parallel columns of poems that meet in the middle. Every page of the poem shifts between columns, hearts, and spirals, illustrating the development of the plot.

In didactic poetry, the two protagonists are the reader and the instructive message the author presents in brief rhyme. For example, in A Divine Image, William Blake notes the flaws of human character, stating the various shades of hostility we hold in our hearts, face, and flesh. His poem treads into a social history of duplicity, demonstrating a reality of human character, a nature we place in the back of our minds.

“Cruelty has a Human Heart

And Jealousy a Human Face

Terror the Human Form Divine

And Secrecy, the Human Dress

The Human Dress, is forged Iron

The Human Form, a fiery Forge.

The Human Face, a Furnace seal'd

The Human Heart, its hungry Gorge.”

In Elegies, loss comes to the forefront of the poet’s mind. In an Elegy for Jane, Theodore Roethke mourns his beloved Jane. He reminisces upon her joy, liveliness, and vivacity. The poem begins with remembrance and ends with a yearning for her wakefulness.

[shelvesfullofbooks]

Hi :) For the end of year book asks: 6, 16, 22?

Thanks for asking! :)

6: Yes, there ist this non-fiction book about how the world changed in the 19th century. It has way more than 1000 pages and is very big and heavy. I really want to read it but it's a daunting prospect.

16: Yellowface. It was good but imo not that hype-worthy.

22: According to Goodreads, it was "Perfect" by Ellen Hopkins. It was an e-book though.

[bibliobile]

Burned by Ellen Hopkins

Hopkins, Ellen. Burned. Margaret K. McElderry Books, 2013.

Summary-

 This book follows Pattyn, a girl who is coming of age in a very strict -and very large- Mormon family. For years Pattyn is a ‘perfect’ daughter to her always pregnant mother and mostly drunk father. Her father spends his free time outside of work drinking and beating her mother; while Pattyn spends her time outside of school attending seminary, cleaning up around the house, and changing her siblings’ diapers. During her few moments of precious free time Pattyn likes to practice shooting her father’s rifle, and one day while doing so, she meets a boy named Dustyn from her school who is out riding his ATV. Her and Dustyn hit it off as he pressures her into drinking and having sex. When her father finds them, he threatens both of their lives and Dustyn leaves Pattyn in the dust. When Dustyn rejects Pattyn and gets a new girlfriend, Pattyn flies into a rage and breaking a window and his new girlfriend’s nose. She then is sent to leave with her Aunt Jeanette who is nothing like she expected. Aunt Jeanette (Aunt J) is the only woman who Pattyn has seen put her father in her place. Pattyn’s time at Aunt J’s is filled with gardening, cooking, riding horses, and a new boy, Ethan. Ethan is nothing like the boys Pattyn new before, he is kind and gentle hearted, he wants to get to know her, and he makes sure she knows he wants her for more than what’s in between her legs. Pattyn comes into her own throughout the summer as her new found self-confidence blooms and she becomes a young women she refers to as ‘new Pattyn.’ Ethan and Pattyn only get closer over the course of the summer while they work together with her aunt. Unfortunately, as the summer draws to a close, Pattyn gets word that her dad has gotten worse and has begun beating her sister. Despite confiding in Ethan, she knows she must return home. Ethan gifts her a promise ring and a gun as a reminder of his love for her, and a reminder of a way out should her dad get too violent. After returning home, inevitably her dad turns violent again, beating her multiple times. Amongst the chaos of the beatings, Pattyn realizes her period is late and she is pregnant. She calls Ethan and tells him, but is unfortunately overheard by the girls at school who begin spreading the rumor immediately. Ethan insists on coming to get her and reassures her that they are going to be alright and that he wants to marry her and love her forever. He picks her up from school to escape her parents, but unfortunately, they are seen by a boy who informs her parents immediately, who inform the police immediately as well. While being chased by the police, Ethan’s truck slides on the icy road and crashes. Pattyn wakes up and finds not only is her baby dead, but the love of her life is too. She then decides that the way-out Ethan provided her would come in handy for those who have made her life the living hell it has become. Then the book ends.

Personal Response-

I thoroughly enjoyed reading this book and becoming immersed into Pattyn’s life. The book is written in a poetry format, with most of its pages set up in varying stanza styles that reflect the scattered mind of a teenager in turmoil. Pattyn comes from a highly religious background that reminded me of my own upbringing, and the perspective was refreshingly, yet sadly, relatable. I also really enjoyed how Pattyn’s summer journey of finding herself, truly showed how beautiful the coming-of-age process can be if allowed to flourish and bloom. Despite the rage that filled me when I finished the book and found I was left on an insanely large cliffhanger, I found the book from beginning to end to be impactful and beautifully written. This was the first book I have ever read by Ellen Hopkins, but after enjoying this one so thoroughly, I am excited to look into reading more.

Connections-

This book has touched on some of the key elements of adolescence that I believe are intrinsic to the feminine coming-of-age experience, bordering on new adult, experience. Despite her family at home trying to pacify her into a girlhood-like submission for the rest of her life, Pattyn fights back to become the strong woman she wished she would have had in her life growing up. She sees her mother struggle with her abusive father and is determined to do anything she can to avoid the same life for herself. She takes her destiny into her own hands and decides to stand up for herself, even if it usually backfires. She asserts her independence by learning how to ride a horse, drive a car, hunt, and shoot a rifle. In doing all of these things to better herself, her self-confidence grows, and she begins to like the person she sees in the mirror more and more. This book is a good example of confidence coming from within. I think if asked about this book I would recommend it, but I am on the fence about keeping it in my classroom or teaching it due to sex being talked about very frequently and implications of school shootings towards the end of the book.

[rockislandadultreads]

Banned Books Week: Let Freedom Read!

To celebrate our freedom to read this Banned Books Week, we will be shining a light on the most challenged books of 2022. First up, a four-way tie for 10th place!

This Book is Gay by Juno Dawson

Lesbian. Bisexual. Queer. Transgender. Straight. Curious. This book is for everyone, regardless of gender or sexual preference. This book is for anyone who's ever dared to wonder. This book is for YOU.

There's a long-running joke that, after "coming out," a lesbian, gay guy, bisexual, or trans person should receive a membership card and instruction manual. THIS IS THAT INSTRUCTION MANUAL. You're welcome.

Inside you'll find the answers to all the questions you ever wanted to ask: from sex to politics, hooking up to stereotypes, coming out and more. This candid, funny, and uncensored exploration of sexuality and what it's like to grow up LGBT also includes real stories from people across the gender and sexual spectrums, not to mention hilarious illustrations.

You will be entertained. You will be informed. But most importantly, you will know that however you identify (or don't) and whomever you love, you are exceptional. You matter. And so does this book.

A Court of Mist and Fury by Sarah J. Maas

Feyre survived Amarantha's clutches to return to the Spring Court - but at a steep cost. Though she now has the powers of the High Fae, her heart remains human, and it can't forget the terrible deeds she performed to save Tamlin's people.

Nor has Feyre forgotten her bargain with Rhysand, High Lord of the feared Night Court. As Feyre navigates its dark web of politics, passion, and dazzling power, a greater evil looms - and she might be key to stopping it. But only if she can harness her harrowing gifts, heal her fractured soul, and decide how she wishes to shape her future - and the future of a world cleaved in two.

This is the second volume in the "A Court of Thorns and Roses" series.

Crank by Ellen Hopkins

In Crank, Ellen Hopkins chronicles the turbulent and often disturbing relationship between Kristina, a character based on her own daughter, and the "monster," the highly addictive drug crystal meth, or "crank." Kristina is introduced to the drug while visiting her largely absent and ne'er-do-well father. While under the influence of the monster, Kristina discovers her sexy alter-ego, Bree: "there is no perfect daughter, / no gifted high school junior, / no Kristina Georgia Snow. / There is only Bree." Bree will do all the things good girl Kristina won't, including attracting the attention of dangerous boys who can provide her with a steady flow of crank.

This is the first volume of the "Crank" series.

Me, Earl, and the Dying Girl by Jesse Andrews

Greg Gaines is the last master of high school espionage, able to disappear at will into any social environment. He has only one friend, Earl, and together they spend their time making movies, their own incomprehensible versions of Coppola and Herzog cult classics.

Until Greg's mother forces him to rekindle his childhood friendship with Rachel.

Rachel has been diagnosed with leukemia—cue extreme adolescent awkwardness—but a parental mandate has been issued and must be obeyed. When Rachel stops treatment, Greg and Earl decide the thing to do is to make a film for her, which turns into the Worst Film Ever Made and becomes a turning point in each of their lives.

And all at once Greg must abandon invisibility and stand in the spotlight.