#people will always be better than you. people will always be worse than you.

[snapscube]

how are you holding up?

the vibes have been pretty dismal today! but i mean what would you expect given the outcome haha.

i’m hanging in there though. i’ve had my anxiety spells. the heart racing. the moments where i just let myself cry a bit. but i’ve been doing everything i can to not turn it into a wallow. it’s tough, i’m definitely doing worse than i would be had things gone right, but i managed to get up and do at least some semblance of my job and provide a nice bit of respite for people also going through it. i consider that a win.

so the plan is to take it one day at a time. i did good today. gonna try to do good tomorrow. rinse. repeat. simple as. 4 years can be a long time for things to be getting worse, that much is true. but even when they were getting worse the last time, a lot of stuff also got better if i looked in the right places. and thankfully the world is really big, so there’s always another place to look.

[harmoonix]

💙Solar Return

observations💙

Part III

ATTENTION: 60+ OBSERVATIONS SO LONG POST!!💙💙💙

💙 Chiron in your solar return chart, will show the area you'll need to heal the most in that specific year:

7h: your relationships

3h: your social skills

4h: your family

8h: traumas

10h: your public image

12h: your sleep

1h: yourself

6h: your health

5h: your inner child

2h: your finances

11h: your friendships

9h: your faith

💙 Moon or Mercury in the 3rd house can indicate a year where you may socialize way more, being more open in talks, sharing things about yourself

💙 Venus in the 1H is a year where you have to prioritize yourself, take care of your body, do skin - routines, relief baths, cleaning

💙 Saturn in the 10H can indicate success at your work/job/career in that year or something big happening with your job

💙 Scorpio Rising in your Solar Return may indicate a year where you gonna evolve more/transform yourself

💙 Moon in the 8H/12H may indicate a sorrowful year on the emotions/feelings, you may get hurt easier, more emotional and more needy that year

💙 Uranus in your 6H/10H can indicate changing jobs, changing something at your job. Maybe a boss, co-workers etc..

💙 Jupiter or Venus in the 9H may be a good year to travel somewhere but also you may have good luck with the school/high-school that year

💙 Venus aspecting Saturn can indicate setting new standards for your love relationship/partner in that year or being more strict with whom you share your love

💙 Earth Rising indicates a year where you need to be more stable, with Capricorn Rising with your career, with Virgo Rising your health, with Taurus Rising your finances/money

💙 Pluto in the 11H may attract a lot of people who may give 'frenemies' vibes that year, take care at your surroundings

💙 Venus in the 5H/7H may give a new romantic interest but not all the time, I had Venus in the 7H in the SR chart last year and I focused more on my views of a relationship rather than an romantic interest

💙 Pluto aspecting your Ascendant can indicate gaining more popularity in that specific year or people being more interested in you

💙 Pluto or Saturn in the 6H can indicate issues with your health in that year. It is a good time to focus on your health and go more frequently at the doctor during this time

💙 Pluto in the 4H may indicate changing in your homelife, maybe moving, your family members changing in better or worse

💙 Pisces Rising can be a year where you may be more dreamy or may have lots of daydreaming episodes, also being more artistic

💙 Sun in the 11H can be a good indicator of making new friends in that year, even making close - bounding with people

💙 Saturn aspecting the North Node may indicate new life paths that imply challenges, a hard path leads to success

💙 Jupiter in the 1H is a good year to put yourself in a good light. You can be lucky in that year with certain things happening in your life

💙 I swear, every time I do a solar return chart, VENUS AND SATURN are always close to each other in my chart. I literally wanna explode.

💙 Saturn in the 12H can indicate a year where you can feel more depressed or pessimistic, or even lazy

💙 You may adopt a pet if you have Venus or Sun in the 6H in that specific year, one or more pets

💙 Mars in your 7H can bring fights/jealousy/arguments in your relationships in that specific year

💙 9h Venus can talk about finding a lover from another ethnicity or culture around that year or maybe a lover during school/ high school or while traveling

💙 Neptune or Lilith in the 12H may be a time when you will feel a lot more introverted, more lonely, more peaceful time with your subconscious

💙 Sun in the 3rd house in the Solar Return will open a lot/being more social in that time, talking more, being more extroverted

💙 Capricorn Venus/Moon will indicate being more mature with your relationships and maybe finding a mature love matching your love life

💙 Mars in the 12H can indicate a subconscious fear or a phobia to an extent. Maybe you'll develop a new fear for something in that year

💙 Pluto in the 8H can indicate secrets, hiding things, but also some issues with feeling yourself, draining and powerful energy

💙 Mercury or Mars in Sagittarius can indicate learning a new language or studying about it

💙 Chiron aspecting Moon may indicate some issues with your mother during that year or your grandmother, but also healing your inner child

💙 Virgo Placements may join in big projects during that year, especially Virgo Rising, Sun, Moon, or Venus, it also can be something profitable for you

💙 Venus close your MC = receiving more compliments in that year/people appreciating you more

💙 Mars in the 3h/Aries Mars may indicate issues with your siblings (if you have), also joining in fights with others

💙 Aries Rising can boost your confidence that year in the Solar Return chart but also attract the same type of people

💙 Uranus in the 7H can indicate an 'unexpected' love interest, meeting someone randomly in that year (can be anyone)

💙 Indicators of being more recognized in the Solar Return chart:

Leo/Aries/Aquarius/Libra Rising

Venus - Asc aspects

Venus - Midheaven aspects

Sun - Midheaven aspects

Sun aspecting Mercury

Mercury in Leo

Gemini Moon/Mercury

💙 A year where you'll have water rising in your chart can indicate a year where you will be more introverted

💙Mars/Saturn or Pluto in the 4th house can bring tension at home during that year, changing homes, discovering something about your family

💙Jupiter in the 8th house may indicate a good time with your finances/money, but also you may find yourself being more sexual

💙 Retrogade planets in the solar return will show areas where you will need the most focus on depending on the house you have retrogade planets (if you have)

💙 Chiron, aspecting the ascendant in the solar return, can indicate lots of healing or wounds to yourself in that year.

💙 Pluto or Scorpio over the 7th house can indicate meeting toxic people or toxic situations in that year

💙 Moon in your 1st house can make you more emotional than you usually are. Can reflect a lot on your personality

💙 Mercury in the 11th house can bring new friends in your life. Is a social placement for that specific year

💙 You may start a job in the year you'll have uranus/saturn in the 6th house or switch to another job

💙 Mars in the 2nd house can spend more money on yourself or others during that year

💙 North Node will indicate a new path for you in that specific year depending on the house you have the NN in

💙 Virgo in the 2nd house may spend money on their health or medical care or vitamins in that year, or even on your diet/aliments

💙 Pluto in the 11th house is usually a year where you will feel that people are more cold with you, or mean, or you'll feel that ppl have something against you

💙 12th house sun can be a year where you will focus more on your subconscious and self - peace rather than other things

💙 Chiron - Venus aspects may have wound related to love topics or relationships in that year, even a possible breakup

💙 Sun or Venus in the 5th house can indicate discovering a new hobby during that year, can be something related with arts

💙 Moon in the 6th house can be a good year to reflect on your mental health, especially if you previously had depression, anxiety, and stress

💙 Mars in the 1st house can indicate a year where you will be more competitive, can be more harsh on yourself, more stubborn

💙 Venus in the 10th house can be a year where you will find love during your work/job, can fall in love with a co-worker, drama about your love life

💙 Lilith in Gemini/3rd house can indicate a year where people can gossip or talk behind your back, despite these you'll be more social and bold

💙 Lilith - Chiron aspects may show a year where you will struggle with your sexual desires, can end up with sexual frustration

💙 Sun or Mars in the 3rd house can indicate getting a car or driving license (of course, if you are close in age for these things)

💙 Mars, Saturn, or Sun in the 1st in the Solar return chart is a good time to focus on gym if you like it. Because your body matters a lot

💙 Since we are soon to end the year, here are some observations. Hope you love some new observations!! Enjoy and take care!!

Harm♡♡nix 💙 2024●

[alchemistc]

Tommy had a younger sister. Eight years apart, Tommy knows intimately what it's like to be the main caretaker to a little girl with a dead mom and a shitty dad.

He'll give the Buckley parents props for at least trying, later on down the line. He hasn't spoken to his dad in years. But he sees the look Maddie gets sometimes, the quiet little corner she retreats to when the Saturday Night title fight is Evan v Margaret and Phillip, and he knows that space, the cavernous echo: could I have done more? and this was never supposed to be my job and will I make this worse or better if I intervene? what raw nerves will I expose if I cut open my wrists to fertilize this soil?

They were good at hiding it, for a while. Evan on his okayest behavior, Margaret and Phillip refusing to rise to any bait like the polite suburban family they were - the kind that would move their grieving child across state lines and force her to keep a secret for decades so that she could never move on from it.

(He's been angry for Evan for years, now, but he's been angry for Maddie too, for himself, for the fucked up things you can never quite prepare for the people that gave you life do to you.)

He had a sister.

And she was bright, and beautiful, and full of laughter and love even when Dad couldn't be fucked to sign her permission slips (Tommy can still forge his father's signature, has it down more precisely than even his own) or buy her a new pair of shoes when the soles broke free and they pinched her toes in tight.

He had a sister. She'd been pissed at him, ten years old and landing brutal kicks to his shins the day before he left for training. She'd been pissed at him, sixteen and quietly sullen over the phone when he told her he was staying in LA. She'd been pissed at him, twenty-two and rudderless while he let her crash on his couch for six months in the shoe-box loft he'd called home.

And she'd loved him. God, she'd loved him. Idolized him: learned football and baseball just to be able to talk to him about the few interests he'd had that his father hadn't dismissed out of hand; always at his hip when he slapped together Kraft Mac and Cheese for dinner and snuck her lunch money at the end of the week when the groceries had dwindled.

He hasn't talked to his sister in years, either.

Maddie tucks herself into the space to his right, glances out over the lawn where Tommy has been sneaking the third cigarette he's allowed himself in the last ten years. She shifts her weight, watches the cherry bloom in the low dusk light. "You gonna share?"

Tommy tips his head to look at her. Digs into his chest pocket for the Reds he'd bought two days before the Buckley parents descended on LA for the wedding.

Maddie's an old pro, apparently, fingers comfortably slack as she lifts the offering to her mouth, glances at him for a light.

The lighter is ancient, still has a snippet of his grandfather's favorite poem etched into the sidewall, though it's worn down and hard to read. The metallic clink of opening and closing the lid, spark igniting on butane with a flick of his thumb, had gotten him through some of his worst nights in Afghanistan. Maddie sucks against the filter and the flame catches thin paper and packed tobacco.

She grimaces at the taste, but pulls, waits, blows smoke out her nose.

"You'd think the Buckley Bowl would calm down after the twentieth rematch," she remarks. She's white-knuckling the railing with her free hand.

"Your dad's gonna come out here in ten minutes wanting to shoot the shit about the Pirates July slump like he didn't accidentally imply he'd have preferred me for a son at brunch yesterday."

Maddie sighs. "They're not always like this. I - You've seen them. I just think. I think my first wedding was a brawl and my second didn't happen as planned and Buck hasn't given them any leeway to throw around their opinions and..."

"You don't have to defend them, you know," Tommy says, and - he's not as close with Maddie as he'd like, but they've talked about it, a little. How lucky she is that Evan hadn't ever lost faith in her, how lucky Evan is to have always had her in his corner. How unfair it had all been. "Not to me."

Maddie's lashes are wet, the corners of her eyes glistening. "They shouldn't do this. Every time, they do this."

"Well, the wedding does come with a devilishly handsome new ally against them," he reminds her, and her laugh is a little soggy, but her eyes sparkle as she takes him in. She takes a drag, does a piss poor job of trying to blow smoke rings. Her hand is tiny when it drifts over his forearm and squeezes.

"Well, soldier, I think we're the cavalry."

Tommy butts out his cigarette into the solo cup he'd set out next to the Adirondacks, an hour after he'd bought the pack, holds it out for Maddie to do the same. Her smile is still a little wet, but it's just as lovely as her. Tommy makes a note to hug her extra hard before she leaves at the end of the night.

"Once more unto the breach," Tommy quotes, and slides the patio door open to let her take point.

[cherryblossomshadow]

[Image ID and source: Tweet from Velodus✨ (@/velodus) reading

The single worst thing about Trump to me will always be how much he's changed people. I've watched friends and relatives become entirely new, worse people in the wake of his political rise. Like it's not merely that he's a terrible guy, it's that he's ruined people.

/end ID]

.

Further tweets from the thread:

qiwave (@/qiwave1)

Another chance for me to quote Pete Buttigieg. “My faith teaches me that the world isn’t made of good and bad people, but rather that each of us is capable of good and bad things,” he said. “And I believe leaders matter because of what they bring out in each of us: the good or the bad.”

.

Mat Douglas (@/MatPDouglas)

I think he just gave them license to be the awful people they always were, but were hiding before

Velodus✨ (@/velodus) replied:

The seeds were obviously there the whole time for them all, which sucks because it'd be easier to process if he had 100% brainwashed them instead of them choosing to like him. But I also will never ever forgive him for giving ppl that permission structure.

.

You can obviously disagree with me. But I ascribe to the notion of "No such thing as monsters," which acknowledges that every human has the capability to be "good" or "bad." "Monstrosity" is not an inherent quality of a person, but an action. This action can be varying degrees of "their choice," depending on the context of the situation.

But if we say that we judge people on actions, then yes, Trump made them worse. Maybe they would have wanted to say that slur before, but Trump emboldened them to actually do it. Trump gave people permission to care for themselves more than others, and I think that made them worse people than they would be otherwise.

My utopia isn't a society filled with Good Humans, bc I don't believe they exist. My utopia would be a flexible, supportive society that is able to react and adjust to the needs of the humans that comprise it (not the humans living "under it" or "in it," but the humans making up the fabric of the society) and encourages the humans to be their best selves.

Is this feasible? Experience tells me no. But it's a much better goal than "get rid of all the Bad Evil Humans."

[rothpie]

❝FIDELITY❞ |part2

MASTERLIST -`✮´- Rafe Cameron x Kook!Reader x JJ Maybank

Summary: Kook!Reader’s world is upended by betrayal, and her only way forward might lie with the most unlikely person—JJ Maybank. But as they build a new life together, old flames and past mistakes refuse to stay buried.

Warnings: mentioning fighting, mentioning abortion, pregnancy symptoms, kind of depression, mentioning alcohol and drugs

previous - next

Sometimes, the reason we go through certain things is simply that we don’t care about the consequences of our actions or decisions. You didn’t think it through, didn’t realize. Calling it a 'youthful mistake' would have been foolish—especially when the mistake is this big.

You took a risk. You both did, as if it were just a game. The harshest blow was realizing that, because you were the ones who did it. You threw caution to the wind and made every reckless choice possible.

But now, it wasn’t about a fleeting pleasure. It was the baby growing inside you. That was the reality staring you in the face. Hard to believe, but you were pregnant.

You were aware that your whole life was about to change. You didn’t know if it would be for the better or worse. You’d never seriously thought about the idea of starting a family before. Being a mother at 20 wasn’t part of the plan. Building a family, raising a child…

You’d never considered that kind of responsibility. More than that, you didn’t even know if you were ready for it.

The morning sickness was hitting harder each day. You’d lost your appetite. You didn’t even want to drink water.

It had only been a few days since you got the positive test result. The moment you saw the double lines, you ran out and bought a few more tests. It was hard to believe. You clung to the hope that it was a mistake. You wanted to believe that. The idea of it being real frightened you more than you thought it would.

The thought always made you anxious, yet somewhere deep down, you convinced yourself you weren’t pregnant, thought it was just some illness. Maybe food poisoning, maybe something else, but not pregnancy.

It couldn’t be. Experiencing something like this at 20 was too much to handle. You grew up in a well-off family; you were always part of the Figure Eight, but that didn’t ease your worries.

Not having financial worries didn’t mean you weren’t afraid of your family’s reaction. Who would accept their 20-year-old daughter being pregnant outside of marriage?

You couldn’t even imagine how you’d react as a parent. This was reckless. What you did wasn’t something most people would do. Just because you like walking on the edge, does that mean you have to? Would you jump into the ocean, knowing you’d drown?

But you did.

Even though you hadn’t been careful, you took Plan B. But which day did you skip it? You couldn’t remember.

You didn’t know if it was you or Rafe who forgot to be cautious.

It didn’t matter anymore. Three out of four tests had been positive. You were carrying his child. You were pregnant, and worse, you felt utterly helpless.

One of the hardest things about living in the Figure Eight was not knowing who was real and who was fake. You had no one to share this with, no one who could help or support you. Except Rafe.

He was your only reality. Your boyfriend, your confidant, the person who understood you best. You were like two halves of a whole. You didn’t deny that he had a dark side, but with you, he was different. It was as if he allowed you to see the real Rafe, let you in.

The peace you felt when thinking of him turned to unease the moment you realized you were carrying his child. The man who once brought a smile to your face now filled you with anxiety because you didn’t know how he’d react.

You had no idea how to tell him. Not just him, but also your family. Even if you couldn’t imagine Rafe’s reaction, you knew you’d be the biggest disappointment in your family’s eyes.

You didn’t want anyone to see those tests. You couldn’t risk anyone finding out before you told them. You thought about throwing them away, burning them—anything to get rid of them. But they’d find them. You could hide them, but eventually, someone would see.

You were losing your mind. The thought of someone finding out was driving you to paranoia. You tried to think of the safest way.

That’s why, when evening came, you didn’t hesitate to toss the pregnancy tests into the ocean. Your worry was turning into paranoia. You started thinking you looked pregnant, that it was obvious when you looked in the mirror. But it wasn’t. Maybe you were only a month or two along, and that wasn’t possible. No one could tell you were pregnant. But whenever your mom looked at you, you panicked, as though she’d somehow know. Instead, they thought you’d started using drugs.

Your behavior had changed; you looked and acted different, both physically and mentally. They were worried about you.

And you knew it. You noticed, but worse, you were scared for yourself. You were afraid of what the future would bring, afraid of people’s reactions.

Days had passed since you took the tests, and without realizing it, you’d shut yourself off from the world. You hadn’t meant to, but you were terrified that someone might see you and guess the truth. But they couldn’t know—you were just being paranoid.

When it came to handling crises, you were probably one of the worst people alive. In moments of crisis, your biggest fears came to the surface. No one would say you had leadership qualities. You were obviously terrible at managing situations. Maybe you should have learned how to handle this, worked on it—but you never did.

And of course, it affected your life negatively, as it was now. Your communication with Rafe had dwindled. Every time you were with him, you worried you’d let something slip. You were on the verge of tears all the time. You were afraid he’d notice, afraid he’d think something was wrong with you.

You’d pushed him away, which was one of the biggest mistakes you’d ever made.

You had no idea how many times he texted you, how many times he called. You hadn’t counted. In two week, you’d met only twice, and even then, it was brief. He wasn’t just worried about you; he was worried about your relationship.

He thought you wanted to break up with him, thought you were losing interest. At first, this thought made him sad, but now it was making him angry. He was starting to take his frustration out on everyone around him. The idea of you breaking up with him haunted him every time he couldn’t see or reach you, and it made him furious.

He was exhausted from trying to reach a compromise. He started to think you didn’t even want to make things work. He thought you were ghosting him, slowly pulling away. In some ways, he was right, but the person you wanted to distance yourself from was never him. It was what you had to do that you wanted to avoid. You didn’t know how he’d react if you told him. On top of that, you felt ashamed. Because you were the one who put yourself in this situation. You did this to yourself. You should never have played that risky game in the first place.

You weren’t looking for someone to blame, of course. This was something you both shared. It was a thrill you both enjoyed. And now, here was the result, inside you.

You knew you shouldn’t have shut him out, that you should have told him the moment you found out, but you couldn’t. You were scared, and it consumed every part of your life and social life…

You just needed a little more time. Just a bit more. You needed a few more days to process this. Then you’d tell Rafe, and after that, your family.

But when had fate ever been on your side? When had it ever smiled upon you?

The way you were shutting Rafe out was driving him crazy. Ghosting him weighed on him so heavily that he was about to lose his mind. You were the one he relaxed around, the one who brought him peace… so why were you pushing him away?

He couldn’t understand. He turned to drinking more, got into fights. He even asked Topper for advice. But he waited. He waited for you to come to him, for you to explain. Maybe he thought you’d heard bad news at a family breakfast. His mind went to such extremes that he even wondered if your family had asked you to marry someone for a business merger. But still, he held back. He gave himself and you time, waiting for you to choose him again.

But you never came.

He texted, called. You left him in limbo with single-word replies. Every day, he checked your Instagram stories, looking for any sign, just a hint of how you were doing, what you were up to. He went around to all your favorite places, hoping to see you, but you were nowhere to be found. He thought you were avoiding him like he was a plague.

After two weeks, he couldn’t hold back anymore. Not any longer. Rafe had always been intense, quick-tempered. Everyone knew he had anger issues. You knew, too. But even so, he held back. He stopped and waited for you.

But when you didn’t go to him, he decided to come to you.

It was a split-second decision. He didn’t think much about the consequences. He didn’t care if your family was home. All he wanted was to hear from you what was going on, to know why you’d been ghosting him.

As he got into his car and drove toward your house, he didn’t send you a text or give you a call like he usually did. You didn’t think anything of it. You didn’t expect anything bad, but somehow, that feeling in your chest hinted that today would be a rough day.

You woke up and had breakfast. When your family left, you went from your room to the living room, wrapped yourself in your favorite blanket, and put on one of your favorite shows. But even though your eyes were on the screen, you weren’t watching. Your mind was elsewhere. You were so panicked that you were terrified someone might find the pregnancy test—even though, even if they did, they wouldn’t know it was yours.

You planned to spend the whole day in the living room. That was your plan. But even if it was your plan, God seemed to have different plans for you.

You realized this the moment the door was pounded on, echoing through the house. You didn’t know what was happening, but your gut was already screaming that it was Rafe. Your heartbeat sped up. Was it the strength of your intuition or a consequence of something else you’d done? You weren’t sure, but you knew the person outside was Rafe Cameron.

What were you supposed to say? What kind of lie could you tell?

You had nothing but the truth.

With your heart pounding, you gently pushed the blanket off yourself. The pounding on the door didn’t slow. Even though you had a feeling it was Rafe, the moment you heard him shouting your name from outside, you were certain.

Trying to steady your trembling hands, you held onto something for balance as you got up. Your legs were shaking. You didn’t feel ready to talk, but then again, how could anyone be ready for something like this?

He was angry; you knew it. If you’d been in his position, you might have been even angrier. You two were in a relationship, and what you’d done was foolish, plain and simple.

As you walked to the door, you tried to control your breathing, which had become erratic. Your heartbeat seemed to speed up even more, as impossible as that seemed. You made it to the door, and after taking one last breath, you opened it. After days apart, you finally saw him again. When your eyes met, you exhaled involuntarily. He wasn’t looking at you the way he used to. There was no tenderness; he was angry. His hair was disheveled, dark circles framed his eyes. His clothes were wrinkled, and he looked like he hadn’t eaten properly in days. His brow was furrowed. You couldn’t even begin to guess how furious he was. His knuckles and cheekbones were bruised and scabbed over, and even though you didn’t know what happened, you could tell he’d been in a fight.

But even as his eyes met yours, he couldn’t find words. It was as if he was at a loss. What would he even say? Would he ask, 'Why?' On his way to your house, he hadn’t even considered what you might talk about. He hadn’t thought about what you might explain to him. All he wanted was you. The happiness you’d once had.

His lips didn’t part. His gaze swept over you. You knew you didn’t look well. You hadn’t really taken care of yourself. You’d spent days lying in bed, only leaving your room when absolutely necessary. You hadn’t even slept well. Your mind had been tormented, torn between terminating the pregnancy and having the baby. Nights were sleepless, and when you did sleep, you were plagued by nightmares. You’d been in pain, in a way, but you didn’t want anyone to see it.

Rafe raised his hand to his head and closed his eyes, trying to hold himself together. He could tell you weren’t in great shape, and as he looked at you with those anxious, pained eyes, he realized he couldn’t bring himself to be angry. He took a deep breath before speaking, and it didn’t seem like he was struggling to find words. He’d never been one to hold back his thoughts; he always said whatever came to mind. But he wanted to control himself, didn’t want to take this approach with you.

“Can I come in?” His voice wasn’t exactly asking. He was going to come in regardless. He just thought he’d be polite. After all, this wasn’t a breakup; it was just that things weren’t going well between you.

The coldness in his voice unsettled you, but you nodded and stepped back. You didn’t feel like you could say anything. How could you look him in the eyes, let alone offer an excuse? Or would you just blurt out, 'I’m pregnant'? What would you even do?

You were sinking deeper and deeper into this mess.

Without waiting for you, Rafe walked into the living room. He knew where everything was; it wasn’t his first time here. The chill between you two as he walked through the room stung. Every corner held a memory. It wasn’t just about sex—even though those were his favorite moments with you. It was also the laughter you shared, the first time you cooked for him in your kitchen, the moments sitting on the balcony, talking and watching the ocean… It was as if every memory was flashing before his eyes. He didn’t want to lose you, but he also needed to understand why you were acting this way.

He heard your footsteps behind him as he stopped in front of the sliding door, staring outside, trying to figure out what to say.

Thoughts of talking to Topper and Kelce flashed through Rafe’s mind, but he quickly pushed them away. The memory of Kelce’s insinuation—that you might have someone else—only fueled his anger. It wasn’t that he believed the idea; he knew you weren’t that type of person. No matter what happened between you, he respected you and was sure you’d never do such a thing. The fact that a so-called friend would casually accuse you like that only made him more uneasy.

You watched him in silence. It was clear he wasn’t going to speak first. You couldn’t tell if he was simply angry with you or if there was something more—perhaps hurt. It was hard to read him, especially when he didn’t want to be read. Rafe Cameron was good at hiding his emotions, and while he was generally open with you, now you couldn’t understand him.

When you realized he wasn’t going to say anything, you stepped forward and started to speak, only to find yourself lost for words. Your gaze drifted over Rafe, finally settling on his hands. You were worried, but truthfully, his injuries were just an excuse to break the silence.

“Your hands…” you murmured, your voice trembling. “Are you okay?”

Hearing your voice after so many days made him almost forget to breathe. He hated that you were his weakness—hated it with every fiber of his being. But his curiosity and anger hadn’t faded. Even if he hated it, his love for you outweighed his frustration.

As he slowly turned around, he looked down at his bruised knuckles, examining them. He’d lost his temper with Kelce for the things he’d said about you, but he didn’t consider it important enough to mention. He thought about responding, but he hadn’t come here to answer questions—he was here for answers.

If you were going to leave him, he’d rather hear it from your lips than be ghosted like some fling.

“Where were you?” he asked, ignoring your question. It didn’t matter to him anyway. He raised his head, watching you intently. He wanted to understand why you were acting this way, why you’d left him so confused that he’d started doubting himself—wondering if he’d done something to hurt you. Running a hand through his hair, he kept his gaze on you, demanding an answer.

“Home,” you finally managed. For a moment, he thought you were joking. You’d been home all this time? You’d had every opportunity to call or text him, yet you’d chosen to ignore him?

Rafe let out a bitter laugh, glancing around the room. He was afraid of what he might yell if he kept looking at you, and he didn’t want to become that person.

You leaned on the couch to steady yourself. It wasn’t the pregnancy making you feel unwell; it was the guilt eating away at you, making you feel like a terrible person. You didn’t want to cry or make him feel worse. You should’ve told him right away when you found out.

Biting your lip to hold back tears, you struggled to keep your emotions in check. Even if you weren’t ready to tell him, he deserved to know. But the words felt sealed inside, as if they’d made a pact never to leave your lips.

As you lowered your head, you heard him say your name. Clearly, he was struggling to keep calm. He started pacing, his voice trembling with anger. “Do you think I’m an idiot?” His gaze remained fixed on you, his movements tense as he continued.

“Look,” he began, trying to lower his voice. He was choosing his words carefully, but it didn’t help calm your racing heart. “I don’t know what happened that day, but clearly—clearly something happened that drove you away from me. I need to know. Do you understand?”

Could you tell him? You were terrified of his reaction. But maybe it wouldn’t be as bad as you feared.

He called your name again as you looked away, his voice filled with an almost desperate edge. He clenched his fists, his eyes narrowed, watching you as he took a step closer. When he finally stood in front of you, your breath caught, your throat tight with the urge to cry.

He lifted your chin, bringing your gaze level with his, his brows softening with a hint of sympathy. His hands threaded through your hair, his eyes never leaving yours. But looking back at him was nearly impossible; tears pooled in your eyes as you bit your lip, struggling to hold back.

“If you’re going to break up with me—” he started, and you shook your head, biting your lip harder. Breaking up had never crossed your mind.

Without the answer he wanted, he closed his eyes, pulling his hands away as he stepped back, trying to make sense of it all. “Then what!” he yelled, his patience snapping. He needed to know what was going on with you—why you’d been ignoring him for two weeks, why you hadn’t called or texted. Each shout made you flinch; you weren’t used to him raising his voice.

He turned, muttering, “I’m going to lose my fucking mind!” You took a step back as he kicked the couch in frustration, hands in his hair as he stared out the window.

He kicked the couch again, letting out a strangled cry. “Fuck!” He was breathing hard, and it was the first time you’d seen him this upset. He usually kept his cool.

“Please, don’t…” you spoke in a shaky voice. The tears were threatening to fall, and his anger scared you—not for yourself but for him.

He turned back to you, his chest rising and falling rapidly as he tried to steady his breathing. “What’s going on with you?” he pressed, his voice thick with tension. “I’m right here! Just talk to me.”

But you remained silent, your gaze dropping as you bit your lip harder. Finally, his patience wore thin. "Fuck! You don’t get to do this! You don’t get to disappear, and then act like it’s no big deal—like I’m supposed to just… what, wait around for you? I can’t—”

“I’m pregnant.”

The words slipped from your lips. You didn’t need to look up to know that they’d stunned him. His whole demeanor changed. His expression froze, his eyes widened, and then hardened into something unreadable. He ran a hand over his face as though he could erase what he’d heard.

“Pregnant?” he repeated, his voice flat, as if testing the word on his tongue. His gaze lingered on you, filled with shock, confusion, and something deeper that tugged at his heart. He couldn’t believe it, but he knew it was possible. There’d been times when the two of you had walked a fine line, but he’d thought you’d always been careful.

When you finally met his gaze, his anger seemed to dissipate. He looked at you, searching for the truth in your face. You sniffled, nodding as your eyes filled with tears. He stared at you, each second of silence amplifying his heartbeat. Finally, he spoke, his voice quiet and laced with shock.

“I thought… I thought you were on the pill?”

You nodded, swallowing hard. “I don’t know when it happened. Maybe when we were drunk… or—I don’t know.” You felt as if you were standing on the edge of a cliff, a wave of vulnerability washing over you. You waited for anything—a word, reassurance, even anger—but Rafe’s response was none of those.

Rafe looked down, running his fingers through his hair as he exhaled slowly. When he finally looked up again, his expression softened, revealing something unexpected: a rawness, almost painfully vulnerable. “I… never thought about it…” He shook his head slightly, pausing to search for the right words. He ran his hand through his hair and avoided eye contact, looking around instead. “I… care about you. You know that. But… I don’t know if I can do this. I mean, I’m not ready to be a dad. Not now. Maybe not ever.” His voice was low and hesitant, as though he still couldn’t quite believe the situation.

Your gaze dropped, and you couldn’t look at him. He wasn’t looking at you either. The problem was, you really loved him. Deep down, you’d cherished the thought of a family with him, even though you knew he’d reject it. You weren’t sure if you were ready to be a mother, but the thought filled you with peace. You had expected a negative reaction from him, and deep down, a part of you had hoped he would accept this baby.

“I know it’s unexpected, but—” you began, finally looking up at him.

Rafe cut you off, his voice low and uncertain. “Look, I love you, okay? I love what we have. I don’t want anything to change.” His eyes flashed with a glimmer of desperation. “We don’t have to do this. There are options.”

His words pierced your heart. “Options?” you repeated, your voice barely louder than a whisper. The meaning of his words sank in, heavy and cold. You had considered this too, but hearing it from someone else, especially him, made your chest feel weighted down. He’d voiced something you hadn’t even dared to say aloud.

Rafe didn’t avert his gaze, running his hand through his hair with his shoulders tense. “I just don’t think we’re ready. I’m not ready.” He looked at you. You could see the fear and resistance in his eyes. “This could ruin everything we have… everything we’ve built. I just thought… maybe we could handle it, so things could go back to normal.”

You took a shaky step back, your legs trembling. His words weighed heavily on your chest, making you feel like you were shattering, piece by piece. “You think we can just ‘handle it’ and everything will be fine?” Your voice cracked, but you didn’t care. The pain in your chest was unbearable, and your heart pounded with the weight of it.

Rafe reached out to you in a few strides, his hand extended. You flinched and pulled back. “Please, try to understand,” he pleaded. “I love you. I want you, just you. Not this… not this.”

Tears stung your eyes, your voice barely a whisper. “I… don’t know what to do. I don’t know if I want this… You—” You cut yourself off. You didn’t know what to say. Neither of you knew how to be parents, but what if you wanted to keep it? What if you didn’t want an abortion—what would he do then?

Rafe let out a deep breath, frustration growing in his eyes. He was searching within himself for options. He didn’t want this to happen; he didn’t want to lose you, but a baby? He couldn’t do this. “I don’t know how to be that person, okay? I don’t know how to be a dad. I can barely take care of myself.” He looked at you sincerely, his face full of pain. “But I know I can’t do this.” He searched for a sign of agreement, a supportive expression on your face. He wanted to see something positive that would keep your relationship intact, but all he found was disappointment.

Rafe was right in some ways. But you didn’t know how to be a mother either. You could learn together—why was he shutting it down? You pulled back your tears, swallowed the pain in your throat, and steadied yourself before looking Rafe in the eyes. “So… if I decide to keep it? What then? Do you want me to do this alone?” The truth hit Rafe like a punch, knocking the breath out of him. He had assumed you would agree, that you would choose him. He hadn’t even considered this possibility. “After everything, are you just… going to leave?”

The silence that followed was deafening, and though Rafe hadn’t said it out loud, his answer hung in the air. He dropped his gaze, and deep down, he knew he’d made his choice. He didn’t have the time for a baby. He wasn’t ready to be a father. He was certainly not ready for such a responsibility. This was something he imagined happening far into the future, maybe in his thirties—but definitely not at twenty-two.

You knew his answer. You understood. You took a few steps back, creating distance between you as you drew a shaky breath, your voice barely holding together. “I can’t believe I trusted you. I thought that—” The words caught in your throat. You couldn’t pull yourself together, feeling on the verge of breaking down.

Rafe’s eyes shone with pain, but he said nothing; his silence spoke louder than any words he could have offered.

You wiped away your tears, and with every passing second, your heart broke a little more. “I guess I was wrong.” Your voice trembled, full of a sadness you couldn’t hide.

Rafe assumed that the conversation was over and the decisions had been made. There was nothing left to say. He had his answer, but he didn’t feel any relief. He couldn’t look at you. What he wanted was certain, clear, and final. He turned and walked away, the weight of his decision pressing down on him. He didn’t look back, didn’t expect you to stop him because he knew you wouldn’t. He hadn’t wanted the relationship to end. He loved you, but even that love couldn’t overcome a responsibility like this.

Leaving you alone and helpless in your home, he walked toward his car. He didn’t want one last look. If he looked, he might regret the impact of his choice on you, but this was it. He wasn’t ready and never would be. Even being able to handle a serious relationship was a big step for him, but the idea of a child? He couldn’t accept it. Getting in his car, he hoped that one day you would understand.

Top

Hey. Golf?

[violexides]

before people get vicious i want to remind you all of a few things, starting with the fact that third party voters are not to blame for the results of the election, but rather that (1) the democratic party refused to end their genocide at every opportunity and, most influential in this specific case, (2) there has been a substantial rise of right-wing sentiment in this country that is what contributed most directly to the Republican victories we have seen in Congress and in the executive office.

regardless of who entered office, there would have been a substantial need to organize, and we are seeing that now more than ever. this is obviously horrifyingly scary shit, but queer people are resilient, Palestinians are resilient, the Black and Brown and Indigenous people of this country are resilient, the colonized people of the world are resilient. we will be able to organize until every last one of us is dead, so know that there is always something you can do. and that hope is a stronger thing than something one tyrant can end.

this is an interconnected struggle and at no point does our work stop. we don't owe candidates or politicians shit. volunteer with a hotline. call/sign petitions. go out into the streets. create art. form connections with people you may not have talked to before. cook for your friends. connect with unhoused people in your area. talk to the elders in your community. find sanctuary online if you cannot find it in person. politically educate, starting from the absolute basics because that is what is most lost in discourse sometimes. take everything one painful step at a time. maybe you got out of bed, maybe you brushed your teeth, maybe you ate breakfast, maybe you changed clothes-- these are all substantial things, and the movement suffers without you so keep doing them.

this is a terribly scary time in the world for all of us, but it has been a terribly scary time for a while across the world. don't let hopelessness stop you from fighting for the end of the genocide in Palestine, Congo, Sudan, and many other places in the world. know that if you are queer, we have survived worse shit throughout our history, and there are so many more options now for us. we need mutual aid for queer people but also and especially for our siblings of color and our disabled siblings and our poor siblings and our altogether marginalized siblings, from here to Palestine, from Sudan to West Papua, from Tigray to Kurdistan, from Armenia to Congo, from the world to the world.

i don't take a second of my time on earth for granted and i haven't for a few years. i am really fucking scared right now, i have been for months and months but it's taken a new form. but, today, the sun is out and shining on my bedroom floor. i brushed my teeth and i'm going to eat some grapes now. my professor sent a kind email. i have a lot of work to do. i have to get busy loving a lot of people.

eat what it takes to survive. sleep what it takes to survive. talk what it takes to survive. learn what it takes to survive. love what it takes to survive. live where it takes to survive. these are our fundamentals. and know that from there, we organize and we fight for something better than survival.

i am not losing my family, my found family, my friends, my peers, my professors, my roommates, my community like this. we gotta get busy.

take as long as you need to grieve. i have been grieving for a long time (this past year, for Palestine; my lifetime, for Iraq) and will grieve these results for the next four years. but understand that no matter who wins any presidential election, we have to organize. we can learn from our past here. i don't care if it's a bush in office, an obama in office, a trump in office, a biden or a harris in office, we have work to do because they won't do it for us.

Palestine and the occupied nations and people of the world will be free. they will not make martyrs of all of us. the struggle will continue so long as we are all free. victory is assured so long as the struggle continues.

i love you. i love you. i love you. i love you as hard as i hate the empire. this hate and this love forges what we need to keep this struggle alive, until victory and liberation for us all.

[rafesbabygirlx]

A Lot of Time has Passed | Part 7B

Series Masterlist | Masterlist

Season 4 Rafe x Maybank reader

Summary: Beginning at the time jump, the Pogues seemingly succeeded at something, Rafe is struggling with making amends and being a better person. Jus sister left the island after returning from South America. Returning after 18 months with a secret.

A/N: took a page from @whytheylosttheirminds with separating the part into 2. Because it’s a bit of writing. About 3k words each. I wanted to finish this off before S4 P2 begins so it’s finishing this is the last part until it airs.

Word count: 2.9k

Warnings: fluff, bit of angst, smut (oral m receiving, chest riding, p in v riding) death, Luke Maybank

“Can we please talk?”

You give it a second but you can see the desperation in his eyes, “okay, talk.”

He runs a hand through his buzz cut, eyes heavy with guilt. “I’m sorry. I do want to be better. I’m the man of the Cameron family now, and what am I supposed to do when all the women in my life hate me? Fear me? It eats at me. I should’ve stood up for Kie, set an example that Ruthie and Topper’s bullshit isn’t acceptable anymore, never was, I don’t care about that reputation anymore, not like I used to. When I look at V, all I want is to be better. I have no excuse.

He watches you, searching for a sign that you’re listening. You offer him nothing, forcing him to keep talking. “I took you for granted for so long. Used you, kept you a secret because I was scared of what people would think, all because of stupid titles. I knew Topper and Kelce wouldn’t say anything but that’s always what they’d use to try to piss me off when we’d be messing with each other. You always meant something to me and I constantly pushed you away. I hurt you more times than I can count, some of the times worse than others.”

Painful memories flash between you—He’s talking about the time he handcuffed you to his bed during his downward spiral after killing Peterkin, dragging you with him to Barry’s when he needed to hide out, putting you in the middle of gunfire with the police when he got caught. Drugging you alongside Sarah and bringing you on that ship then standing idle why he watched his dad strangle you until you were blue when you got smart with him about murdering Big John. All because he didn’t want to be alone.

“You came to me for protection from your father, and I failed you. You tried to help me, and I pushed you away. But all I want now is to see you happy. You shouldn’t have even forgiven me.”

Tears slip down your face as you reach out, cupping his cheek. “I told you what I thought your problem was, and I was right. You’ve grown without your father’s shadow. Even before I came back, you’d changed. You are the man of the Cameron family now, and you can be the kind of man your father never was. I need you to be all in, Rafe. No more half-measures. V needs you. I need to know we can count on you. Only then can we move forward.”

You grab the sea turtle V left on the bed this morning, unintentionally but great for the point you’re trying to make. “Because what if she was there, what if she could understand all that happened.” You toss it to him. “Think about her Rafe.”

“I promise,” he says, voice cracking. “Forever and always.”

A bittersweet smile spreads across your face. The words that once comforted you in your darkest moments return, anchoring you both.

I’ll protect you, I promise, forever and always.

I’ll be here for you when you need me, I promise, forever and always.

I’ll kick his ass for you, I promise, forever and always.

“I love you, Rafe, and that’s never changing.” You kneel closer, wrapping him in a hug.

“I love you too, Y/N,” he whispers, his voice resolute. “Forever and always.”

╰☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆╮

You look at him, and he smirks. You kiss him on the lips, then his jaw, then his neck. He coos at the feeling. You sit up and pull off your tank top, laying back down. You stare into his eyes intently as you play with the waistline of your shorts. He goes to reach out for you, but you smack his hand away.

“Uh uh, take your clothes off.” “Yes, mam.” He stands up and rids himself of his own pajamas, now standing completely bare in front of you. “Lay.”

He does exactly as you say. You straddle his legs, running a finger down his length to tease him. Kneeling your upper body down, arch your ass into the air, and he smiles down at you. You grab him in your hand, running your thumb over his tip, smearing his precum. You drop a glob of spit down onto him. You lower your head onto him, beginning to bob up and down. He thrusts up into you at the sensation, and you remove your mouth from him.

“Uh uh, I’m in charge tonight, baby.”

He nods his head and throws his hands up in a mock surrender. You begin bobbing again, taking as much of him as you can, gagging on his huge length but taking him nonetheless. You run your hand that's not pumping him up and down his torso, scratching your nails on the way down. You hear his series of grunts and moans and feel the way he'd tense up trying to refrain from thrusting up.

He was getting close, and you could tell by the way he'd twitch in your throat. When his breathing started to hitch, you let him go and watched for his reaction. As he realizes his orgasm was lost, he opens his eyes to see you kneeling in front of him with a big smirk.

“Not fun being treated like shit, right?” You laugh, and he rolls his eyes but eventually laughs quietly. He goes to sit up, and you push him back into the pillow. You want to tease him as much as you can. You made up, but it's nice to give him a little taste of his own medicine.

You start making your way up him, taking a seat right below his chin. You push down into him and moan. You begin to ride his chest. Rafe always loved to eat you out, and you know having him this close to your pussy drives him crazy.

“Let me taste you.” Gripping his head, moving it up closer to your clit. “Tongue out.” He lays his tongue out flat, and you move a little closer to also ride his tongue. Using him like this feels so good since you'd usually let him take control.

Your movements quicken, digging your nails into the back of his head, and you crane his neck. You're getting close, and you don't plan on slowing down. You hold yourself up on the headboard, and your body twitches. Rafe moans into your clit, and your head throws back. You shake as you come, arousal sticking to his chest. You lift up a bit to his mouth, and he cleans up what's left.

You move back down to his waist. Licking the palm of your hand and reaching back to stroke him. His body jolts at the feelings. You line yourself up with him and sink down onto him. Your nails dig into his chest at the stretching. No matter how many times you do this, the feeling always has you shocked.

You settle on him for a second before you lift up and throw yourself back down onto him. Your pace is immediately quick. You bounce like there's no tomorrow. Taking control of him like this is so rewarding. The feeling is amazing, but you need more stimulation. You begin to grind, feeling his pelvic bone rub against you has seeing stars.

“Can I touch?” You nod, and Rafe's hands roam your body. You're driving him crazy tonight, but his touch is soft. Taking every inch of you in. You're an angel sent from heaven to him. You're both close, and you're getting tired. Rafe grabs your hips and keeps you moving. You lean down and begin to kiss him.

“Love you, baby doll. Forever and always.” You lean your forehead on his as you continue your movements. “Fuck, Rafe. I love you more. Forever and always.” You cry out with a high-pitched moan as you release your orgasm. Rafe follows right behind you, gripping your waist hard and letting out a bunch of grunts.

You lift off of Rafe but stay on top of him. You shift down a little, enough to be able to lay your head on his chest. Following the rise and fall of his heavy breaths and listen to his heart race, while he holds you tightly, leaving kisses on the top of your head. You could lay like that forever.

╰☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆╮

The next morning you and Rafe wake up still tangled up with one another. He’s dressed and doesn’t smell like sweat and sex anymore, which means he left at some point. It angers you a bit but you chose to let it go for now. You take a shower and come out of the bathroom to see Rafe flying V around the room like Superman. You’re downstairs having breakfast, really just talking to V trying to make her laugh. That fell into a bit of a silence.

“I took the deal.”

“What?”

“Last night, I took the deal. That’s why I was dressed. I know you noticed but didn’t say anything.”

Taken aback just a bit. You were still very nervous of what Hollis’s intentions were. But you said you’d be supportive no matter what. “Ok, so now what?”

“She sent the info to the investors. The deposit should come out at some point today. And now I’m in contract with them.”

“Did you read the fine print about murder if this thing goes wrong?”

He laughs at the outrageous statements and goes to reach for your hand. “Yes, I read the whole thing, no there isn’t anything about murder. Not sure it’s something they’d want in paper.”

You smile and grip his hand a little harder. You go to say something but he cuts you off, “after yesterday, after our talk, after last night (he winks and you giggle), I thought this was the best step for US.” I want to be taken seriously, I want to be a strong father for V. Then I saw a photo of me and Sarah and I thought about the things I did to her. How she hates my guts, how she looked at me yesterday. I can’t be that person anymore. I’m gonna do the right thing and this is a stepping stone in that. This is for our family. I know you always hated that I’d tried to treat you with gifts and money, but you’re stuck with me and what’s mine is yours. So get used to it.” He takes a deep breath and smiles at you.

You release his hand and walk to the other side of the table to sit on his lap. “Ok Rafe Cameron. I told you I’d be there with you the whole way. Anything you need I’ll help you. I’m not going anywhere this time.” You give him a big kiss on the cheek when your phone starts to vibrate.

You reach over and pick it up and JJ is yelling in the other side. “JJ calm down!”

“Sis I need you here right now. I’m alone and got this letter and I’m freaking out.”

“Okay, OKAY, I’ll come.” You hang up and turn back to Rafe. “Do you think you’d be ok for a few when I go handle something for my brother?

“I mean sure but I thought we’d celebrate.”

“Ok first rule of the “be a better man” journey is to know that when a sibling calls in distress saying they need you. They probably need you. That would’ve saved you a lot of trouble.”

Rafe looks at you with a blank stare. “Ok- go then. I’ve got V.” You’re shocked at the reaction. Not being able to tell if he was mad at it or not was difficult. You didn’t mean to throw in a little jab about the past. It’s just a good lesson for him to learn.

You lean down to give him a kiss. “I love you.” Looking deeply into his eyes. “Forever and always.” He returns back.

╰☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆ ☆☆╮

Meeting JJ at your old house feels strange. He’s standing in the living room, staring at a piece of paper and rubbing his head. He hadn’t explained anything on the phone, which left you uneasy, but seeing his disheveled state makes your anxiety spike.

“J? What’s going on? Where is everyone?” you ask, voice tight with worry.

“They’re out on the boat, taking care of Terrance’s body,” he mutters, barely looking up.

“Terrance? As in Cleo’s Terrance? What happened?”

JJ sighs, exhaustion lining his face. “Cleo got kidnapped. Terrance was involved but didn’t know who the target was. He tried to save her, and it got him killed. I’ll fill you in later, but I need you to read this.”

He hands you the letter. The first line catches your eye: “Master JJ Maybank. Don’t let that go to your head.” You laugh nervously, but JJ doesn’t even crack a smile.

“Genrette’s groundskeeper brought this to me,” he explains. “Said Genrette left it for me.”

The words on the letter blur as you try to piece together its meaning. “I think we need to find dad,” JJ say, your eyes dart back to him.

“Absolutely not. I’m not seeing him,” you snap.

“Good thing it’s not about you,” he counters. “He’s the only one who might have answers to whatever this is.”

JJ’s expression softens, and he nods reluctantly. “You’re right. Sorry. Any idea where he might be?”

“I have a hunch.”

Minutes later, you’re on JJ’s boat, slicing through the water toward Barracuda Mike’s house. When you arrive, Mike is in his yard fidgeting with a go kart, watching the approaching storm clouds.

“Hey, Big B, you know there’s a storm coming, right?” JJ calls out.

“Yeah, I see it,” Mike responds.

You hang back as JJ pleads with Mike for information on your dad’s whereabouts. Moments later, Mike sighs and mutters, “I’ll call you if Luke gets in touch.” Sending you both off to the dock.

JJ sets the phone on speaker as it rings. Luke’s familiar voice comes through, cautious and calculating, until he hears Mike’s dog bark in the background. Realization hits him too late.

“We gotta move,” JJ says, eyes wide. You both sprint back to the house and bang on the door. Mike steps out, irritation creasing his brow.

“Mike, I’ve got a daughter to get home to. Don’t waste my time with this bullshit,” you says, voice cracking under the strain.

“I’m a grandpa, huh?” Luke’s voice drips with smugness as he steps out, a twisted smile on his face. “Didn’t see that coming.”

“Actually, you’re not,” you retort coldly. “She’ll never know you exist.”

Luke’s smirk falters, replaced by a fleeting shadow of disappointment. “That’s no way to talk to your old man,” he says, trying and failing to sound fatherly.

JJ shifts protectively in front of you, confronting Luke about his sudden reappearance and silence. You take a step back to the dock, needing space to process. Pulling out your phone, you FaceTime Rafe and V for a distraction. Rafe’s face lights up with a grin.

“Hey, when are you coming back? I’ve got something to tell you,” he says.

Before you can respond, the sound of sirens fills the air, and you see JJ and Luke sprinting toward the boat.

“Shit,” you mutter, forgetting you’re still on the call. “I gotta go. Bye, V. Rafe, I’ll call you later.”

JJ jumps in the boat with Luke behind him. “Take me home on the way,” you tell JJ firmly as you climb aboard.

Luke glances at you. “So, you’re a mom?” he asks.

“Yes,” you reply flatly, not sparing him a look. “And don’t ask anything about her. You don’t deserve to know her.”

“It’s with that Cameron kid, isn’t it?” Luke chuckles, as if confirming a suspicion. “I always thought that’d happen—the way he used to sneak in and out of your window. And I knew that’s where you’d be when you disappeared. Good for you, little miss new Kook.”

You clench your jaw, holding back a response. As the boat nears your house, you quickly text Rafe: Home. Meet me at the dock.

When you hop off the boat, you wave to JJ as he drives him and Luke off. Rafe and V are already walking down to meet you. You pull them into a tight hug.

“So, what’s up?” you ask, sensing the weight in Rafe’s eyes.

“I’ve been thinking about everything,” Rafe begins. “I’m really sorry for all the shit at the beach. Pogue this, Pogue that. I shouldn’t have put you through that.”

“We’ve talked about this,” you say, tilting your head at him.

“I know,” he continues, “but I need to know we’re good. My dad was a Pogue; that shit doesn’t matter. What matters is I wanna be like him, hardworking and keeping this family together. I want to build things, be better, in my own way. I’m going to patch things up with my sister, and I want you there with me. When the deal with Hollis goes through, I’m keeping a piece for us. For the three of us.”

The thought of the deal makes you pause, the uncertainty gnawing at you. Rafe notices and takes your hand. “Hey, it’ll be okay. We’ll make it work—you and me. I promise.”

He leans in and presses a soft kiss to your forehead. With that reassurance, the three of you head inside, ready to face whatever comes next.

TBC

Taglist:

@maybankslover @eringaitskill @luissa266 @lolll505

@dayyzlol @calaryssia @eg-dr3amer3 @hotch-meeeeeuppppp @rafestar @bigbonenative

@writtenbyhollywood @livie4lifestarkeyblyth @leilanizcals

[blindmagdalena]

just because antony starr posts so much about his dogs ... how would homelander feel if vought gave him a dog to raise? you know, to bump up his numbers or something so he couldn't get out of it haha

i'm firmly of the opinion that Homelander doesn't like animals, and animals generally don't like him. he's the kind of guy who poses with horses and gets bit. cats hiss at him. dogs tuck their tails and give him whale-eye.

the thing is he was never raised with animals. he doesn't speak their language any better than he speaks our social language. they stink, they shed, they're lesser. pets are just another thing in this world that he was denied, and instead of letting that be one of many heartaches, he chooses disdain. he can't be hurt by it if he never lets himself want it in the first place.

it's precisely because of this that i really enjoy the idea of a dog being foisted onto him. especially one that inexplicably does like him. an excitable young golden retriever that was born and raised under fluorescent lights, destined for doom in a lab, but some genetic or behavioral incompatibility with the project caused it to be rejected.

he'd be extremely put out. there's something infuriating about the way it wags its tail whenever he so much as looks at it. he wants nothing to do with it, and yet it still follows him absolutely everywhere he goes. it barks and whines when he shuts it out of rooms he's in. it drives him crazy that the thing just won't take the hint.

"You're pathetic, you know that?" he says, practically seething. not even he's completely sure why.

he fucking hates the way it begs. those big dumb eyes not understanding his rejection. how it reflexively performs little tricks over and over and over for any scrap of approval, no matter how many times he tells it to go away. hell, it even starts to get excited about that because at least he's paying attention to it, and god, that's all it wants.

"Would you shut up!"

it's just too much. the whining, the hair, the constant demand. it overstimulates him.

deep down, what he hates is how much of himself he sees when he looks at it. the desperate pleading part of him that barks and sits and fetches when told to. the part of him that always obeys. that always wants to obey.

"What is it gonna take for you to get it? I don't want you!"

Nobody wants you. You're not like them.

he never hurts it. never lashes out physically. he's been told what to do with it and for better or worse, he's going to do it. albeit the most bare minimum.

but then he comes home one day and there's no scratch of paws skittering over wood floors. there's no wagging tail, no excited yelps. his gut churns and for a second he thinks the thing must be dead. instead he finds the pup curled up in its bed by the window, staring vacantly out at the skyline.

maybe there's something worse than seeing what you hate about yourself in something else. maybe it's becoming just like the people who made you the way you are.

after weeks of rejecting the thing, he has the audacity to be hurt that it's given up on him.

who gave it that right? why is this stupid little animal allowed to give up when after years and years and years, Homelander is still Vought's show pony?

"Hey!" he snaps, all anger and hurt and rejection.

the dogs ears pin. it looks at him. and there's just... nothing there. no hope, no expectation. who knew a dog could look depressed? he finally got his point across.

and he hates everything about it.

so he kneels down next to the dog bed, jaw tight. he stares for a long while before he just... gives the dog a pat. he's bad at it, his touch stilted and awkward through the glove, but he sits and he pets the damn dog.

eventually, that little tail thumps lightly against the bed, and he feels something tight in his chest loosen slightly.

"Good boy," he says quietly, a little surprised by how easily the words come to him.

he's always thought of praise and affection as something difficult. something hard won. his life doesn't make sense if it isn't.

the dejection doesn't go away instantly. it's a slow thing, like a wilted flower coming back after too many days without water.

but one day he comes home to the skitter of paws and a flurry of fur, and for the first time, it makes him smile.

[seeker-ophelia]

Mythal, Solas, and Lavellan

So there’s lots of discussion about Mythal and Solas, and we need to talk about it.

I too, at first, was mad that Lavellan wasn’t enough for Solas.

And then I started thinking about it.

Not only was Mythal his mother, his creator, she coaxed him into being. Into changing his spirit and his purpose.

Regret Number 1.

He let her use his knowledge and wisdom to do a terrible thing, to kill (tranquil) the titans, changing a whole race of people at a molecular magical level.

Regret Number 2.

When that choice created the worst power known to Thedas (the blight) he was responsible again. And Mythal asked him to step up and fight against it, and he did. And a lot of people died.

Regret 3.

Mythal DIED. (IMO The gods blighted her because she stood against them for wanting to use the blight but that’s not important here). And Solas blames himself.

From Solas’ perspective, he is her puppy. Her Emerald Knight. Her General. Her Protector. Her Wisdom. Her servant, her SLAVE. He is BOUND TO HER. And he caused her downfall.

And you’re all like, GEAS! GEAS!

But wait.

From HIS perspective.

Rook says something somewhere along the lines of like, by abstainsing from being the good guy (oh wait maybe it was Varric in the fade…)

By choosing to be the villain instead of the hero is he absolving himself of the guilt (regret) that comes from having to have made those choices.

From Solas’ perspective, he is her slave.

LOOK AT HIS BODY LANGUAGE.

He is a worm in the dirt in front of her. He is a scolded child, a puppy with his tail between his legs.

But in the eyes of Mythal, he was always her friend. The one person who had always stood by her. She did not literally entrap him, or bind him. It was all in Solas’ own head.

He refused to take accountability for his actions, only able to survive through the crushing weight of his own guilt by blaming it on servitude to Mythal.

That’s why Rook escaped the prison. Because she faced her own choices, choices with terrible consequences, and accepted them. Took responsibility for them, and promised to do better.

Remember, after the Temple of Mythal…

Solas…

You gave yourself into the service of an ancient elvhen god!

What does that mean exactly?

You are Mythal’s creature now, everything you do whether you know it or not will be for her. *** You have given up a part of yourself.

***THIS WAS NEVER TRUE. IT WAS NOT TRUE FOR FLEMYTHAL & MORRIGAN, NOR WAS IT TRUE FOR ABELAS, NOR WAS IT TRUE FOR SOLAS. HE JUST WANTED TO BELIVE THAT IT WAS.

…I suppose it is better you have the power than Corypheus. Which leads to the next logical question… What will you do with the power of the Well once Corypheus is dead?

The war proved that we can’t go back to the way things were. I’ll try to help this world move forward. **Lavellan is talking about the mage/templar conflict, but Solas is putting her in his own shoes. Solas reached for power he could not control and fucked the whole world up.

You would risk everything you have with the hope that the future is better? What if it isn’t? What if you wake up to find that the future you shaped is worse than what was? **

**This is literally him asking her what she would do in his shoes. He woke up and the world was in chaos OF HIS MAKING. To prevent an evil HE CAUSED from spreading, he orchestrated the downfall of the people he loved and swore to protect.

I’ll take a breath, see where things went wrong, and then try again.

Just like that?

*He is in shock that she can be so cavalier about the guilt that has rocked him for (4?) millennia.

If we don’t keep trying, we’ll never get it right.

*And this is the only thing that calms him down.

You’re right. Thank You.

For what?

You have not been what I expected, Inquisitor, you have… impressed me.

You have offered hope that is one keeps trying, even if the consequences are grave… that someday, things will be better.

Then, of course, he takes this to mean that he needs to try to put The Evanuris in a different prison and take down the veil which isn’t at all what we meant sweetie but that’s okay get up and try again.

This is a classic case of a person in power not understanding the terrible, horrible consequences of unfettered power imbalances. Because Solas was always Friend to Mythal (Im not going into Freudian sex shit with you weirdos right now).

Solas was Mythals FRIEND.

Mythal was Solas’ EVERYTHING.

co·de·pend·en·cy

/ˌkōdəˈpend(ə)nsē/

noun

excessive emotional or psychological reliance on a partner,

His Mother, General, Creator, Protector, Queen, Goddess.

And he loved her so fiercely with every fiber of his new, physical being.

And he hated it.

And when Lavellan fell for him, and he for her, he was afraid.

Because he would never force a spirit against her purpose, and in his eyes the only way to love is the sick and twisted way he loved Mythal.

But again, from Mythal’s perspective, it wasn’t twisted. Solas was just Solas. And once again the powerful care not for the thoughts and opinions of those beneath them.

And that sin is on Mythal.

And that’s why she comes out and talks to Solas. Both aspects of her. To release him from the bonds that never existed. Be free, friend. You always were, but if you need me to say it I will because I love you.

“I pulled you from the fade and sent you into war. I used your wisdom as a weapon… and it broke you.”

Cole: Is there a way to save more spirits, Solas?

Solas: Not until the Veil is healed. The rifts draw spirits through, and the shock makes demons of them.

Cole: Pushing through makes you be yourself. You can hold onto the you. Being pulled through means you don't have enough you. You become what batters you, bruises your being.

Be free.

“The things that I have done…”

“Are not for you to bear alone, my friend. The many wrongs we did, we did together.”

And he COWERS before her. Shaking and shuddering. FNALLY being absolved of the guilt he’s carried since his inception.

“I release you from my service.”

And he SOBBS. At the RELIEF.

And Lavellan kneels before him (wrong, IMO because they should be equals but its fine)

And he can go back to his original purpose.

Not Pride.

Not Knowledge.

Not even Wisdom.

But Protection.   

“My life force now sustains the veil. With every breath I take, I will protect the innocent from my past failures.”

The Shepherds Wolf. Protecting his flock from those who would do them harm.

And Lavellan promises it won’t be terrible, as long as they’re together.

And maybe Solas can try this different kind of love. A love built on respect, and trust, instead of fear, and obedience.

And he can be his purpose, Protection, and also be a man. And love his vhenan.

Because he is free.

[blackknight-kai]

Just to make a small update:

Yes I’m working on asks 🫶 sorry it’s delayed work kinda…..hit hard. I don’t even get more than a minute to get up 1 time a day hardly anymore because it’s so much chaos and yada yada yada.

Asks are gonna be a bit slow (I’ll sprinkle through them here and there) but come January when things slow a bit for me I’ll be back to regular programming.

Thank you for being patient with me! You guys have given me so much inspiration and I wanna get it out but I’m so brain dead 😭💀

That said, have a small not fleshed out head canon about Pranks!

Wukong and DO are the kind of guy that gets TOO competitive and too into pranks and shit.

You towel whip him? You better HOPE he doesn’t catch you. Your ass is gonna HURT when he gets you back with it or something else.

I advise you not to get into a pranking war with him. No. Just…for your sanity and safety do NOT. Because you challenge him? He’s going to make it so so much worse for you.

In my house, whatever is done receives 10x the payback. That’s how I grew up and I can imagine Wukong/DO being WORSE.

While Wukong is obvious, DO you’d think “Nah he would be light on the pranks he’s reserved” and that’s where you go wrong. See, I feel like DO being quiet means he’s a thinker. And thinking people(monkeys) are dangerous. He has PLANS.

Him being in love with you won’t save you. It might buy you time or a smaller prank…but in the end he’s going to win the prank war.

While Wukong/DO won’t HURT you….will he put you in danger just for a bit/to watch you squirm? Yes. Sure he has the situation under control and you won’t get hurt in the end but…he’s committed to assert his dominance as a master trickster.

He LOVES the games and challenge.

But don’t get it twisted, he’s all for good fun not genuinely fucking you up mentally or hurting you. If you tell him he’s gone too far or tell him to keep it at a certain level - he would, just for you because he cares about YOU. Hes gonna annoy the hell out of you though because he always seems to have SOMETHING up his sleeve. You can get him good, surprise him, or one up him. But be ready for the consequences of that. He may be proud but he’s going to show you who is better. He’s like a predator playing with his prey when it comes to tricks and pranks.

If you don’t think you can handle his full prankster attention try team work with him instead. He will be the most amazing partner in crime.

Slight nsfw thought:

When you one up him he’s gonna reward you because it definitely turned him on that you got him gooooood. Gonna make sure you feel reaaal good about it too with how proud he is of you.

Honestly the tricks and pranks probably lead to playful/spicy play between you guys because it’s kinda like flirting 🤣 especially for him.

[ace-louis]

I know that it can often feel like nothing ever gets better and that it doesn't even matter who wins this election, but I promise the difference between Kamala Harris and Trump is really big even if you don't think she is going to "save the world".

First of all it is never selfish to vote against fascism in your country. And as flawed as the US democracy is currently, it is always worth voting in a way that prevents it from getting worse. I think you are all underestimating how much worse it can and will get under Trump.

Additionally, whether Trump or Harris becomes the next president doesn't only affect the US. I am not American and I am very worried about what a second Trump term would mean for the world!

Climate change: In his first term, Trump pulled the US out of the Paris agreement, which holds countries to certain climate goals, which they should work towards. Although climate policy is never enough anyway, I promise it makes a big difference whether a country as big as the US tries to be more sustainable or not. And this has an impact on the entire world, as climate change is a global phenomenon mainly impacting those in the global south.

Ukraine: Trump is very pro-Putin. They are basically besties. The US is the biggest financial contributor to Ukraine at the moment. If Trump wins, it will be basically impossible for Ukraine to win this war and stay its own country. This will be terrible not only for Ukraine but for all of eastern europe, as Putin is not going to be done with his expansion plans after he gets Ukraine.

Palestine: Lastly, I know that Palestine is a big reason why people didn't want to vote for Biden or now Harris. However, Trump is more pro-Israel than either of them. This article is a good summary of some of the things we can expect from a second term from him. For example:

- he has said he will deport pro-palestine protesters who aren't US citizens

- he will increase weapons exports while slashing aid to Palestinians

- he will stop sanctions against Israeli settlers in the west bank

Just to name a few examples. The article linked above has more examples of what he did in his first term to help his pal Netanyahu.

TLDR: Harris will not necessarily make the world or the US a better place but Trump for sure will make it a hell of a lot worse in a million different ways.

I’m not even joking I just know I won’t be able to stand this website ahead of Nov 5 because there’s already massive fearmongering going on and usamericans pointing fingers at people who’re going through literal genocide and it’s just all around embarrassing bc it’s like painfully obvious that no matter who’s elected our lives will basically be the same and neither candidate is actually going to follow through on any substantial change

[certifiedsexed]

hi younger teen here, are there any like. adverse mental effects to having sex at a young age? i have a friend whose (currently) 13 and is already having penetrative sex (started at 12) and while im pretty sure it’s safely i also know that said friend knows someone who had sex with the same guy they are and got pregnant so? additional question can sex from hypersexuality as a trauma response be harmful? thanks!

Hi! I've never seen any research that specifically ties sex itself at a young age to adverse mental effects. There's a lot of fearmongering research calling rape "sex" and pointing out how that has adverse mental affects but that applies to rape at any age.

Just sex itself has no proven adverse mental effects dependent on age. Unless someone wants to correct me with an actual paper?? [Fr, I'm always open to reading research, even if it takes me forever to get through it.]

Sex itself can be unhealthy if you're having it with people who don't treat you respectfully, or if you don't want to be having it at all but that's also true regardless of age and can also apply to many different things!

[Sex can also be unhealthy if it's not actually sex. What I mean by that is if you're being raped/sexually abused. For example, you're a kid/teen dating an adult [someone 18+]: what you're having in that situation isn't sex, it's rape.

Same if someone is pressuring/guilting you into having "sex" with them: that's rape. Or if someone threatens you, or they "have sex" with you without getting your consent. That's rape.]

But as long as your friend is safe and enjoying themselves, I wouldn't worry too much. Hopefully, since your friend already knows this guy has gotten someone pregnant [if that's not a rumor], they'll be extra careful!

But even if that doesn't work, there are options on what to do if they get pregnant and/or think they weren't safe enough. And having support behind them is a much better option than just not having sex.

And yes, while it's absolutely okay to have trauma responses-Its in fact, very understandable but sometimes they can be harmful for you.

It depends sometimes but its definitely a good idea to keep an eye on your trauma responses to make sure you're not relying on them too heavily and if they're actually helping you or if they're making you feel worse.

But also don't judge yourself too much for your trauma responses, especially when you're still stuck in a traumatizing situation, because they help keep you alive! Be kind to yourself.

Hope this helps! Let me know if you have any other questions. <33

[ranticore]

I've often seen people ask you for drawing advice(which yes absolutely!) but what kind of writing advice could you give someone who wants to start? (or just narratives as a whole)

Ok my biggest advice and the thing I always spend most time on when editing is that u should tell the audience way less than you think you should tell them. Provide information sure but don't draw connections and don't hold a reader's hand. Like for example one minute ago I was reading over a paragraph with the final two sentences (paraphrased): "The word 'faery' didn't quite make it out of his mouth [in reference to himself]. He'd never thought of himself in those terms" and my editing comment was to nix that last sentence entirely because it's just saying out loud what the previous sentence is telling us, like holding ur hand and pointing at it saying "hey this is what that last sentence meant btw". it's easy to end up with a lot of that but you need to go back and cut all of those out. think about a reader drawing their own judgements, how much more engaging it is

Other random stuff I've picked up over the years

Kerb your worldbuilders disease ur writing a story not an encyclopaedia

Read your paragraph aloud to identify repetitive or weirdly structured sentences

There should be a clear causal chain running the length of the narrative - x happened because of y, which happened because of z, and so on. No matter how many links in the chain you should know it start to finish

Written media gives you an unlimited time budget, a reader can take as long as they like with it. You don't have to make it quick and snappy. You get to show & explore things that visual media can't, so take advantage of it. Also ditch every piece of writing advice which is like "trim all the fat and also imagine camera angles and scene cuts like it's a movie" because it's not a movie and you aren't constrained into a short runtime.

First draft is rough it's supposed to be rough just write it

It's impossible to write dialogue that nobody would ever say.. easy to scoff and think "nobody talks like this" but they do

I can't in good conscience advise everybody do this but the slush draft (draft 0 as it were) of stbh was narrated entirely in first person by the pov character in each chapter, with the framing device that they were explaining their actions to a judgemental third party. This was just done for fun before any other world building or even plot it was just to get the characters right first & to sort out how they would attempt to justify their actions, when they'd try to make themselves sound better (or worse), and just their voice in general. It ended up being absolutely invaluable

[twst-aceofhearts]

Take A Break!

a/n: you can't stop me from loving ace :) also epel fic is next @waterthatsmoe just for u <3

tw: Yuu overworking themself

pairing: ace x gn!yuu

words: 1049

taglist: @luxaryllis @thegoldencontracts @waterthatsmoe

Ace had noticed how Yuu had been helping multiple people with anything they need. He didn’t say anything at first, but he slowly noticed how you started to neglect your own needs.

Yes, he’s a bit of a troublemaker, but he still looks out for his friends. From his conclusion, Yuu is putting too much stress on themself. So, like a good friend, he brought this up to them. When they brushed him off, he got a tad bit annoyed. Like the stubborn person Yuu was, they tried to convince him that they were perfectly fine.

The dark circles under their eyes said otherwise. Ace saw how Yuu had been cramming test material lately because they didn’t have any time for themself.

Ace doesn’t like to be pushy, but Yuu’s behavior was honestly starting to get to him. Nonetheless, he didn’t want to leave them alone.

“Dude, this is how you make yourself pass out. Are you trying to get yourself a trip to the nurse’s office? Man, just put the book down!” He scolds them, trying to take Yuu’s pencil away from them. They’ve been doing Proffesor Trein’s assignment for the past hour. Ace tried to offer some help again, but it was met with a hard no by Yuu.

“I swear, I can’t tell who’s more stubborn: you or Riddle…That says a lot!” Ace grumbled under his breath before sending a glare towards Yuu. He was going to help them one way or another.

“Nngh…I’m not getting help from someone who has lower grades than mine..” Yuu huffed, groggily trying to take their pencil back.

“Seriously?! You’re going to use that stupid reasoning?!” Ace was not impressed, holding the pencil higher out of Yuu’s reach. 

He scowls and looks away. “You’re not always this stubborn, you know?! You always help others and then you end up exhausting yourself. How many times have you overslept for class because you were pulling another all-nighter to study the night before?” He sighs, grabbing Yuu’s wrist and pulling it back down, stopping them from reaching for their pencil. “You’re not a machine, and you need to relax sometimes. Even Riddle does that every once in a while. So please, listen to me—just this once.”

Yuu stayed silent, their tensed shoulders slightly relaxing. They ceased their attempt to grab their pencil back, their hand falling limp in his grasp.

Ace sighs, slowly calming down. After all, anger wouldn’t solve the issue. “Look, I just want to help, Yuu. You need to get better at letting others assist you. If you don’t, you’ll get worse every time. You might even start developing anxiety if you keep putting so much pressure on yourself. It’s not healthy. It’s dangerous,” Ace frowns, his expression disapproving. “I don’t want you to hurt yourself because you’re being reckless.”

I…damn you and your..stupidly effective way of words…mmph..” Yuu huffed, pulling away their hand from his grasp, placing their hands on their lap. “...fine…I’ll take a break…”

Ace’s frown turns into a small smile. He slowly extends his hand, holding out their pencil to them. “See, that wasn’t so hard.”

He sits next to Yuu, crossing his arms over his chest and tilting his head to the side. “...if you don’t mind, can I ask you a question? It’s not about your horrible study habits, so don’t worry.”

“...shoot,” Yuu sighed, gently rubbing their tired eyes.

“Why do you try so hard to help others? I mean, you barely have time for yourself and you’re still trying to be there for others. You’re the kind of person who always puts other first; you barely think of your own well being. Why?” Ace’s eyes slowly trail over Yuu’s face. The dark circles under their eyes were a little concerning.

“...You want the short version or the long one?”

“The long version, please,” He nodded, genuinely wanting to know what was going on through Yuu’s mind.

“...Back in my world I didn’t really have anyone to look to for help. Or..anything at all. It’s just me. I was alone. No family, no friends—I don’t want other people to go through the same things I did…” Yuu trailed off near the end, their tone becoming more reserved and their voice lowering in volume.

Ace stares at you for a moment, before sighing inaudibly. “I didn’t know,” He gently places his hand on your shoulder, giving Yuu a warm smile. “But, you’re not alone now. You have friends, you have me,” he ruffles your hair fondly.

“...it’s unsettling when you’re not acting like a troublemaker—being all cheesy like this instead.” Yuu blinked, closing their eyes for a moment, then opening them before they fell asleep.

He lets out a light chuckle, poking your forehead. “Heh, but that’s why you like me, don’t you?” He smirked, his usual carefree smile returned.

“Ah there it is….wait, where’d you get that idea from?” Yuu narrowed eyes, feeling their cheeks heat up into an “unnoticeable” pink. 

He grins teasingly. “Well, you put up with me. And your face always turns pink when I’m being nice to you. Like now—it’s adorable~”

“I-...damn you…” 

“Hehe, I’m a little correct, huh?” He laughs again, pulling away slowly. “Just relax for now, okay? Don’t push yourself too hard.” 

Yuu sighed, too tired to care about his teasing remarks anymore at this point, standing up to sit on Ace’s bed.

Ace watched Yuu for a moment, before he followed behind them, sitting down next to Yuu. “Tired? If you are, you can take a little nap.”

Yuu nodded, thus leading to Ace gently laying Yuu down and tucking them into the covers. “After all this studying, you could use a small break. Besides, you look more tired than usual.”

Yuu let out a small hum, bringing their legs up and tucking their knees into their chest. “...Can you…” Yuu trailed off, feeling a sudden wave of shyness.

Ace smiled slightly, gently patting their head. “Yes, I’ll stay here until you’re asleep. Don’t worry about anything. Sweet dreams, idiot.”

Yuu let out a small huff. “The only idiot here is you…” They mumbled, burying their face into the pillow cover.

Ace laughed quietly, keeping a hand on Yuu’s head before he slowly started stroking their head. “Yeah, whatever….sleep well.”

credit to @cafekitsune for divider

[angelwishess]

𝜗𝜚 Floyra Intro Post !

❝Because theres no one on the land or in the sea more in sync than those two.❞

|| playlist. || moodboard. || pinterest quotes. || pinterest board. || (<- in the “Dynamic w Floyd” section!)

Floyra is the ship of my main oc, Kyra and Floyd! Kyra is my Yuusona twisted from the Disney Princess Stereotype.

This intro post is just to graph out the timeline and details of their relationship. Funfacts at the end :3 (Fair warning though, this ended up being SUPER long… So feel free just to skip to the funfacts if you want HAHAHA)

Please note I may or may not have changed some things in the canon storyline for my own amusement hehe. Nothing too major though.

Tropes :

Idiots to Lovers, Bestfriends to Lovers, Soulmates, literally the DENSEST people ever … Actually they’re more like cowards. Mutual pining, mutual SIMPING they ADORE eachother they are absolutely WHIPPED, chaotic lovey dovey couple, tooth-rotting fluff, no i mean seriously this is the fluffiest ship EVER, they make eachother both better and worse simultaniously. They share the same braincell. Basically already a couple before they even start dating but they dont realize it.

Kyra: “What?? Ofc we’re not dating lmao wdym we’re just friends!!” <- just held his face tenderly and looked into his eyes adoringly while calling him the prettiest boy in the world and kissing his face all over

Floyd: “yeah lol why would u think that” <- arm around her waist, basically always looking at her with a dopey grin and heart eyes

First Impressions

When Floyd heard that there was an unexpected appearance of a magicless student at the entrance ceremony that blazed in with a flaming fire tanuki and set fire to the mirror chamber, he was intrigued. When he learned that very same student was, quite literally, from an entirely different world, he was even more intrigued.

Not to mention the fact she lived in that rundown, deteriorating 'dorm' that was literally called Ramshackle, and she was almost expelled two other guppies on the very first day of school.

But, when he saw her for himself he was... Disappointed.

Often times she just stood by the sidelines, seemingly in her own world with a far-off look in her eyes and an empty smile that ticked him off for no apparent reason.

She never reacted to anything, letting people walk over her like some sort of welcome mat. Somehow, she didn't even feel alive.

To put it bluntly— Floyd thought she was boring.

Just a wimpy, puny little shrimp who didn't even have any magic. Who wouldn't even run away if her life was on the line, weak and defenseless. Naive. How boring, and here he thought he had another play thing... But wheres the fun if he doesn't get a reaction out of it? How lame.

Kyra and Floyd only officially met during book 2.

Kyra passed by Floyd a bunch of times before— but never actually ‘saw’ him. Floyd on the other hand, already had an opinion of Kyra.

Seeing her just simply standing by the sidelines again and saying nothing and just… Staring. He decided to finally approach her straight up.

Deciding to give her a squeeze for the fun of it— he didn’t expect at all for her to hug him back and basically turn the situation on him instead. It flustered him, and made him walk away from the whole scene out of confusion and embarrassment.

Despite everything, Kyra thought Floyd was amusing. and insanely pretty.

Building Interest …

As time passed they seemed to keep catching glimpses of eachother. And with each passing day, she seemed to get more and more... Interesting.

Facing overblots despite having no magic, causing trouble left and right and getting into such ridiculous situations it makes you wonder how she does everything she does without getting tired of how absurd it all is.

When his first impression of her was her being ‘boring', his second was her being naive. How else could you explain it? She had to be either ridiculously brave or incredibly stupid and naive to do the things that she does.

Kyra and Floyd don’t have any notable interactions until the main events of Book 3.

When Kyra decided to strike up a deal with Azul to free all of the students under a contract— Floyd thought she was stupid. Naive, and way too easy of a target. It was laughable. It basically confirmed everything he thought of her.

As Floyd and Jade were monitoring Kyra and Grim as they packed up their things, Kyra acted as if nothing major was happening. Talking to them and cracking jokes like they were old friends. It was then Floyd and Kyra found out they might be more similar than they thought, saying the same things at the same time and holding the same opinions.

When Kyra almost dropped a bag of her things, Floyd helped from impulse. He laughed it off, but Kyra decided to give him a kiss on the cheek as a ‘thank you’.

He froze in place. Not expecting that kind of reaction from her once again, and just kind of… Staring at her as she passed. Jade had another laugh at his brother.

When Kyra first saw Floyd in his merform, he took the chance to try and scare her a little. Just for fun. But just like before— it totally backfired, and Kyra just looked at her with the same wonder as she did the first time. She had the nerve to call him ‘Beautiful’ under her breath, too.

So, Floyd simply swam away after realizing she wasn’t going to give him the reaction he wanted, deciding to play with someone who will.

But when he tried to attack a nearby friend of hers— She punched him straight in the face! A fire burning in her eyes as she straight up threatened him.

Floyd was… Confused. Confused about Kyra, i mean. One moment she was staring at him like he was a of work of art, the next shes throwing hands at him with zero hesitation. He thought she was a pushover— but maybe he was wrong.

She had guts, though. Thats for sure. A magicless little thing like her deciding to put her hands up and fight, even threatening him? A 13ft long eelmer that could rip her apart without a sweat? Something about it.. Scared him a little. Ending up with a bloodied nose, staring down someone who didn’t show any fear or any regret.

Floyd always wanted a challenge. But did he expect that challenge to come in a 5’7 package, decorated with pretty pink bows? No, not at all.

But thats something. And boy, does Floyd love the thrill of the unexpected. After this interaction that past intrigue he had in her before came back 2 times stronger.

It only worsened when Kyra’s little plan to destroy Azul’s contracts actually worked… And Floyd got chills seeing the look on her face.

It was so unlike what he thought of her. A big, smug grin. The face of someone who knows they already won. It was almost malicious. And it was then he realized— she wasn’t as dumb or as naive as he thought she was, either.

But when they got back to the Lounge, it so happened that Leona seemed to have missed one, single contract. When they spotted it, Kyra was the first to react. Managing to grab it before Azul.

Azul wasn’t too happy about it, screeching and yelling for her to give it to him, grabbing her while doing so.

And in that moment of tension, of fear and action, she did something that shocked everyone. In the face of danger, she held the sole contract tightly in her hands and she—

…She ate the contract.

She shoved the glowing papering in her mouth, and swallowed the thing. And it worked. Honestly they didn’t know which was more ridiculous… Her decision, or the fact it was a success.

She grinned so widely, so proudly. She had the nerve to even laugh in Azul’s face. “Yeah, thats right! Screw you, octoboy!”

Floyd couldn’t surpress the laughter that bubbled up his throat watching it all go down. The sound of her laugh ringing in his ears. It was just so… Ridiculous. She was ridiculous.

She had just outsmarted Azul… And the best solution she could think of was to eat the contract? It was downright cartoonish!

But when Azul overblotted, Floyd got to see Kyra in action. He was surprised all over again. But he should be used to it by now, he should expect it. She just keeps surprising him.

She was no pushover— rising up to the challenge when needed. Even if she still acted unserious, even if she acted goofy and wild, she still got down to business and made it work nonetheless.

And he realized she wasn’t anything like what he thought of her before. She was… Nothing like what he thought. Always surpassing his expectations of her no matter how much they changed.

Everytime he thought he had her figured out, she goes and does something that makes him rethink it all over again…

She was very, very interesting. And now, shes got his full attention.

Strangers to Besties!

After the main events of Book 3, Floyd had started following around Kyra more often. Actually, scratch that. He started following her around constantly. She eventually apologized for punching him in the face, too. Surprisingly.

Realizing they were actually very similar, they began hanging out more and more, until they eventually became an inseperable duo that everyone knew about.

At first, most were surprised. Kyra had only just started coming out of her shell, so most were still under the impression she was a sweet, mild mannered young girl.

But after befriending Floyd— all of her self-control truly did go flying out of the window. If she was bad before, she was even worse now. Freely skipping classes more often without a care to go find Floyd, trying to juggle live fish in the courtyard, or jumping out of a window just to escape some of the staff. and the like.

Late night adventures, dancing in the rain, sneaking out of class, spontaneous hang outs and sleepovers, pulling pranks and causing trouble left and right… They were so in sync, its was scary. Kyra was almost like a second Floyd, and everyone knew that it was probably best to run in the other direction when you see them side by side.

No matter what the situation, they always had eachother’s back, too.

It was strange to think they were ever strangers. They felt like they’ve known eachother for years— thats how well they’ve grown to know eachother. They were as thick as thieves!

Hanging out everyday, whenever they could, they just had so much fun together all the time!

To everyone’s dismay, of course. They were far too in sync, if the chaos around one of them was bad it combined when they were together.

Floyd finally found someone who could keep up with him, and even better, keep him on his toes. Kyra surprised him everyday, and thats what he loved. He found someone who understood him, too.

Kyra on the otherhand, found someone who encouraged all of her once repressed desires. She found someone she could be herself with, with no fear of judgement.

Never one without the other, those two. Wherever Kyra was Floyd was surely close to follow, and wherever Floyd was Kyra was most definetly near. They followed eachother around, always stayed close to one another.

Slowly, they’ve grown to not only seek eachother out to go and have fun, but also for comfort.

Platonic ..?

What started as a simple friendship which focused on the high of ‘having fun’ and causing trouble, or just basically being partners in crime— slowly turned into something much more… Intimate.

When Floyd stormed all the way to Ramshackle after a bad day at Mostro Lounge, he didn’t really know what to expect, he just wanted to get away from everyone else and Ramshackle was the best place he could think of.

He didn’t expect Kyra to be so caring. Pulling him into her arms and running her fingers through his hair while encouraging him to rant.

Kyra had always been an affectionate person, he knew that. It started small— little kisses on the cheek and forehead from Kyra to him, hugs and the like. But this was different. It felt different, atleast.

The way she held him felt different, and the way her lips gently kissed his skin made all of the stress from before sizzle into nothing.

He couldn’t help but melt, and before they knew it this became a routine for them, too.

They grew to find themselves comfortable being vulnerable around eachother. Showing sides of themselves to eachother most wouldn’t see. And they knew eachother better than anyone else did.

Simple, friendly touches became something more. The playful wrap of Floyd’s arm around her waist became tighter, and Kyra’s touches on him lingered for longer. Suddenly the playful ‘I Love You’s didn’t seem platonic anymore— atleast not with the way they looked at eachother while they said it.

Simply seeking eachother out to go cause chaos turned into seeking eachother out to just simply be in eachother’s presence instead. Whatever activity they did started to come second, and as long as they were together they were as happy as could be.

Of course, they never recognized this change. In their point of view, they’ve always been like this. But everyone else can see as plain as day, that something definetly changed.

It was painful for everyone involved, really. For some reason neither of them seemed to acknowledge the obvious feelings between eachother.

Everyone could see the way they looked at eachother, the way they acted around eachother… Everything was so painfully blatant… But they still couldn’t admit it. Even when the lines between friendship and intimacy began to blur.

Realizations!

Nothing about their relationship really changed at this point. They just kind of realized their romantic feelings after being deep in denial for WAYY too long.

The first to realize their feelings was actually Kyra, believe it or not. Which is funny because shes never been the best at realizing her own emotions in general.

She was definetly panicked about it, and decided to not say a word of it to anyone. She didn’t want to ruin the friendship they had, after all he was her dearest friend. So she kept her mouth shut and continued on pretending like it was nothing.

She felt selfish having such feelings. She felt as if she didn’t deserve him, like he deserved better than her because she grew up thinking she must be unlovable. And so she kept quiet for the sake of him, too. She thought it was best for the both of them. (<- LIARRRRR!!!!!!)

Floyd realized a little later, it kind of just hit him one day. They weren’t doing anything in particular, he just looked at her and went “Oh. Ohhh.”

Like a lightbulb went off in his head. He didn’t say anything about it either for awhile. Eels are cowards, after all. And he didn’t know if she felt the same. So he just decided to act like nothing happened, continued this routine of theirs that they’ve grown attatched to.

Maybe there were afew times where they wanted to say something about it, to finally admit the unspoken thoughts they’ve had kept in the back of their minds… But they never go through with it. Always backing out last minute, brushing it off.

The two were cowards, dancing around their mutual feelings. Unsure of how the other felt, so they decided to just leave it all unsaid. Even if the look in their eyes said otherwise.

Saying they were just “best friends” was just so much easier. It was what they were used to, what they were comfortable with. It was easier to brush it all off as them being comfortable eachother, sharing beds and exchanging gentle touches. It was all platonic, of course!

…Though Floyd was hesitant with his own feelings. He never expected to find someone that captured his interest so much… Yet he wondered, was he ready to commit?

Strangely, there was no doubt in his mind. It was yes, it always was, yes. The moment he asked himself that question he answered it immediately at the same time.

Of course, because he realized if it was Kyra, there wasn’t anything he wouldn’t do. Man, when did he get so whipped for such a silly shrimpy?

Merfolk only choose one mate for life. And Floyd is sure he wanted his to be Kyra.

He was scared of course after realizing his own feelings. Besides Azul and Jade, he's never let anyone get this close to him. It was strange letting Kyra in like this. He didn't plan on her, not at first at least. but now that he has you, he wants to keep you forever.

Man, she just kept surprising him, huh? He never even thought he could feel so deeply for someone. But hes so glad that he found her, that they found eachother.

Difficulties…

When Kyra left with Epel, Rook and Elena during Book 6, Floyd was upset.

Thats an understatement, really. He was furstrated, worried, and somehow he even felt betrayed.

Why didn’t she tell him?? Doesn’t she know its dangerous? Whats a shrimpy like her gonna do, huh?

He knows Kyra can take care of herself, he knows shes capable and he knows she can defend herself. But that doesn’t stop him from worrying.

Throughout the span that shes gone Floyd is restless. Hes snappier, hes moodier and he cant seem to stop pacing around no matter how hard he tries.

But when Kyra gets back— he completely ignores her.

Kyra was so very confused. Actually, everyone was. This was a first for the two of them. Honestly, Kyra expected him to run towards her just like he always does. But he doesn’t.

Kyra is back, but that doesn’t change his mood. If anything, it worsens. And Kyra doesn’t have a clue why! Everytime she tries to approach him, he just turns his heel and walks away. And hes never looked at her like… that..

Kyra is a total mess. And suddenly shes not as good as keeping her real feelings at bay like she usually is. She wondered if she did something wrong? Said something wrong? Was he finally sick of her? And that was when she realized— she was terrified of the thought of losing him.

In desperation she went to Jade. Maybe she should’ve asked Elena for advice instead, but before she knew it she was sat infront of Jade, asking for help with his brother.

If anything, Jade seemed amused with her situation. Of course he did. But with a mischevious twinkle in his eye, she had a feeling he had a scheme brewing up in his head.

Maybe she should’ve known better than to trust Jade… But she didn’t really have a choice, or so she thought as much.

Something about this situation felt so… Deliberate. She couldn’t quite put her finger on it, but it seemed like he knew she’d come to him for help sooner or later.

After giving Kyra some advice and words of encouragement, he did something rather out of character of him. Bringing into a hug, he held her rather close to himself.

Kyra didn’t really notice this, and accepted the hug with no hesitation. Wrapping her arms around him and sighing as she melted into the well-needed hug.

Little did she know, Jade’s eyes were glued onto his brother’s figure, looming by the doorframe with a scowl on his face. It made Jade chuckle, deciding to tighten her arms around Kyra juust a little more to see what he’d do.

Of course, Floyd wasn’t happy about it. Now, Floyd is not a jealous person by any means. He has better things to focus on, other things to keep him entertained. But at moments like these, when hes already in a bad mood, he can’t help that primal instict, its in his blood after all. A moray is a moray.

Tearing her away from Jade, he drags her to somewhere else. Leaving a very amused Jade watching them leave.

And so, an argument occurs !!! Its a back and forth, Floyd mad about what he just saw, Kyra trying to explain the situation then her getting mad at him back for avoiding her like the plague.

It ended up with Floyd admitting he was mad because she didn’t tell him about her going with them, but at the same time he was mad at himself for not being able to be with her then.

Kyra realizes that, yeah, she probably shouldve let him know she was going. But she couldn’t just brush off the fact he hurt her by doing what he did, shes grown enough as a person at this point to not let her own feelings go unheard.

Reconcilliation!!! They both apologize and promise to do better, and what better way to catch up on lost time than a sleepover??

Best believe that after they made up, they went back to their normal selves as if nothing happened— actually, maybe even worse with how much clingier they are. They seriously missed eachother, seeing how much they stuck together. 😭

“Home”?

When Kyra got news of the possibility of finding a way back to her home she was in shambles. So very conflicted between the place she called home and the place she felt was home.

She knew she had to leave some day. She knew this freedom she had was temporary. She knew one day, she’d have to go back to the life she grew to despise, the life that was never hers.

She didn’t want to leave, though. Of course she didn’t. But still, she didn’t really have a choice.

She decided she wouldn’t do the same mistake and leave Floyd out of the loop. If anyone deserves to know first, its probably him.

And so, while theyre sitting on the rooftop of Ramshackle she mentions it. And Floyd is… Upset. Of course he is. Hes beyond upset, really. He just got his best friend back, now hes hearing she might be going away again? For good? Forever?

No way. He couldnt accept that, there was no way he could. But before he could even say anything— Kyra spoke first.

“I don’t want to go back. I really, really don’t.”

“…You don’t? Huh? Why?” There was a wave of relief that crashed over Floyd when he heard those words fall from her lips, his eyes glued onto the girl beside him. Hanging onto every word she says. “No. Its just… Its not my home, atleast not anymore. I dont think it is.”

“I think, this is my home now.” She chuckles, eyes glued down to the ground below. “…Because you’re here.” She says, turning to look at him. She spoke in that tone that she only used behind closed doors. When no one was looking. That soft, sweet voice she used whenever she carded her fingers through his hair and whispered sweet nothings to him until he fell asleep. It wasn’t unauthetic like the voice she used when they first met— no, it was genuine. Real. Full of adoration, of fondness. Her gaze held so much love.

“…Hah, what’re you gettin’ all sappy for, Sea Angel? Thats so cringe.” He laughed, but his heart soared. Even if it was cheesey, he couldnt help but swoon with just the way she looked at him. Like he was the most beautiful thing in the world. She always said he was the prettiest boy in the world.

She moved forward, her face leaning ever so close to his, so close he could see every line and curve of her features. He laughed at first, “Hey, what’cha tryna do, huh? What? Do I have somethin’ on my face?” He joked, but she didn’t respond. It looked like she was thinking, like she was deep in thought. “…Kyra?”

Her name left his lips for what was the first time. Hanging in the air like a silent prayer of longing, of want. And her own lips met his. Capturing it in a sweet, sudden kiss.

Time seemed to have stopped. It always felt like that when they were together, but this was different. Nothing could prepare him for that— hell, he didn’t even get the chance to kiss her back, the moment felt as if it went on forever but it was over too quickly all the same.

There was a flash of realization on Kyra’s face as her cheeks flushed a red that could rival Riddle on a rampage. Stumbling and stuttering, she couldn’t handle the embarrassment, and before he could even say anything she ran away. Leaving him on the rooftop, wide eyes and a stomach full of butterflies.

Yeah. Kyra is really stupid sometimes.

After that whole thing, she ran to Leona to let out her thoughts. He listened, though he said he ‘didn’t have a choice anyway’.

“So… You kissed him then you just.. Ran? Seriously?” “I PANICKED!!!”

Floyd and Kyra don’t really interact until Malleus’ overblot. And during the time they’re in Floyd’s dream, shes hoping he doesn’t bring up what happened at the rooftop.

Confession!

The confession takes a long, LOONG time. Im talking probably around book 7 or later. Probably when Kyra confirmed that shes staying in Twisted Wonderland. (Everyone thank Papa Crewel, he sorted out her documents for her :33)

Hehe because eels are cowards and they dont take the shot unless theyre sure it’s a winner. So he waits, and waits some more. And of course, that kiss was the sign he needed to finally just go for it.

Eventually, Floyd does confess. Although I still haven’t thought of the details— it does go something like this.

When Kyra at first laughs at him thinking it was a joke, he got annoyed. He didn’t think this was funny, and after seeing the serious look on his face she stopped immediately.

After realizing he was being genuine, she started straight up BAWLING. Sobbing, because she couldn’t believe someone could ever love her the way she is.

Shes deemed herself as unlovable so very long ago, she didnt expect the person she adored so much to ever love her back. She felt selfish, wanting to accept his feelings. But she wanted to be selfish at that moment.

Floyd has never been one to comfort people. He was never the best at it, but if its her, he’ll try. He always does. It was weird, but if it was her he always found himself doing things he’d never thought he’d do for someone else.

When Kyra started rambling about all of the reasons he “shouldn’t” love her, he started talking about why he loved all of those sides of her. Kissing away her tears n’ all. AUAUAUUUGGHHHH

It was honestly super emotional ESPECIALLY for Kyra, but she of course accepts the confession and they FINALLY KISS PROPERLY OH MY GOD THANK U !! ROUND OF APPLAUSE !!!!!!!

Floyd also calls Kyra by her actual name instead of ‘Shrimpy’ or ‘Sea Angel’ during this confession :3

“Its About Time!”

Honestly, nothing much changes after they confess.

Sure it takes some time to get used to them being officially a couple, but they’re still mostly the same.

However, I’d like to think that they just… Don’t mention it to anyone. Not because they’re keeping their relationship a secret, they just ?? Dont ???? Because they’re weird like that idk and its funny to me

For awhile no one actually knows they’re dating, and one day when someone comments on how they really should just suck it up and start dating they’re like “oh, lol we already are” “WHAT—“

Floyd definetly brags about Kyra a lot though 😭😭 and Kyra does the same… theyre both so down bad its SICKENING.

Funfacts!

Floyd was kind of scared of Kyra for a little while LMAOO 😭 shes a little TOO freaky …

Floyd has stayed over at Ramshackle so much that he’s has a bunch of stuff over there. An extra toothbrush, some changes of clothes, you name it. Its probably there. You can bet Floyd just lets himself into Ramshackle all the time, sometimes even in the middle of the night. But Kyra is always so chill about it 😭 (only because its Floyd HEHE)

Before they even started dating— behind closed doors they already acted like an old married couple 😭

Kyra and Floyd are lowkey super domestic behind closed doors, especially after a sleepover. Waking the other up with kisses ….. Helping eachother get ready for the day, helping eachother get dressed … Cooking together …….. theyre so sickening …………

Even if they aren’t with eachother all the time, they still manage to include eachother in their lives somehow. Whenever they go off on a solo-adventure, they always come back with some sort of trinket that reminded them of the other.

Speaking of, they’re both avid collectors of anything they deem cool enough. Random rocks, acorns, a lost penny, you name it. They like to show eachother the things they found throughout the day to eachother!

They have this silly little game Kyra started. She began hiding little sticky notes with sweet messages or a doodle and sometimes gifts in places she knows Floyd will find, and he’s started doing the same thing. Ever since then, its kind of become more like a competition on who can find the most sticky notes 😭

Kyra gets cuteness aggression from Floyd. Yeah thats it.

^^ she genuinely believes hes the cutest thing ever. Whatever u say queen!!!!

Floyd loves giving Kyra random gifts out of nowhere. The gifts can range from ‘a cool rock’ to a designer jacket. Kyra doesnt know which she prefers HAHAHA

Kyra herself prefers handmade gifts, so she loves to make Floyd pieces of jewelry and clothing! Shes always so proud whenever she sees him wearing something she made :3

Floyd and Kyra have been kicked out of class several times for laughing too hard.

They admitted to eachother before they even started dating that they couldn’t imagine their life without the other… can they pls take the hint omg

Floyd always feels super bad whenever he loses control of his temper around Kyra. One time he snapped at her, and he immediately apologized 😭 he told her to slap him if he ever did that again, hugged her so tight too and Kyra honestly found it so cute 😭

Floyd always perks up whenever he realizes Kyra is close by, always running straight to her. Kyra does the same thing and quite literally jumps into his arms.

Both Kyra and Floyd’s main love language is physical touch!! But Kyra loves to compliment him all the time, and Floyd loves gift giving :3

Kyra always greets Floyd with a kiss on the cheek. Yeah she started doing this before they were event dating im afraid ….

Kyra and Floyd love to read together at night, though Kyra usually falls asleep first AHAHAHA

But !! Kyra is also the first to wake up more often than not, and always wakes Floyd up with butterfly kisses on his face :3

Floyd convinced Azul to add some of Kyra’s favorite foods to the menu of Mostro Lounge just to get her to come visit more often

Kyra fights anyone that bad-mouths Floyd. Floyd doesnt know whether to find it cute or annoyed that she keeps getting herself hurt 😭

^^ SPEAKING OF, Kyra literally unlocked a much more caring side of Floyd with her being so accident-prone 😭 girlie got herself injured so much FLOYD had to step in smh …

Floyd is the kinda guy to carry Kyra if her feet started to hurt while walking or if she sprains an ankle teehee

They’re both banned from an arcade in town after they broke a claw machine and stole all the plushies inside. And other things but that isnt as important.

When Floyd feels like hanging out with her, he’ll look for her around campus then just throw her over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes then just walks away. Kyra never struggles or objects and kind of just … accepts her fate 😭

Rambling…

Kyra grew up thinking the love she received will always be conditional. That she always needed to live up to some sort of expectation, and so she created a ‘perfect’ persona in order to do just that.

She still keeps that persona from the Prologue to Book 1, but begins to break away from it during Book 2– but while in her past she was only loved for the version of herself she created for others— it was the opposite with Floyd.

He disliked her so-called ‘persona’, but fell so deeply in love with her real self.

^^ she was very confused, yet so very happy.

Floyd never expected to ever love or care about someone so deeply, but at the same time he can’t imagine anything he wouldn’t do for Kyra.

Floyd thinks everything is fun as long as Kyra is with him <3

Kyra only ever started showing her more vulnerable side to Floyd during her character development. He was the very first to ever see her break away from the unbothered act she always put on.

Floyd was never one to let himself be so soft and vulnerable around anyone, ever. But strangely, he lets his guard down around Kyra. Kyra knows of the much gentler side to him, and she adores it so very much.

Kyra is extremely understanding and patient of Floyd and his mood swings. She knows he’d never intentionally hurt her, and always knows just how to cheer him up. Whether with a silly joke, a spontaneous adventure or just lying in bed with him in her arms.

Kyra trusts Floyd with her LIFE. She trusts him so much its ridiculous. No matter what the situation, she always feels like she can rely on him… But she wont trust him with her food. Or her plushies.

Extra: Incorrect Quotes (?)

I have more on my 🎀! twst shennanigans tag lol

[porterdavis]

A great long read from Tom Nichols of The Atlantic:

“Democrats and liberal pundits are already trying to figure out how the Trump campaign not only bested Kamala Harris in the “Blue Wall” states of the Midwest and the Rust Belt, but gained on her even in areas that should have been safe for a Democrat. Almost everywhere, Donald Trump expanded his coalition, and this time, unlike in 2016, he didn’t have to thread the needle of the Electoral College to win: He can claim the legitimacy of winning the popular vote.

Trump’s opponents are now muttering about the choice of Tim Walz, the influence of the Russians, the role of the right-wing media, and whether President Joe Biden should not have stepped aside in favor of Harris. Even the old saw about “economic anxiety” is making a comeback.

These explanations all have some merit, but mostly, they miss the point. Yes, some voters still stubbornly believe that presidents magically control the price of basic goods. Others have genuine concerns about immigration and gave in to Trump’s booming call of fascism and nativism. And some of them were just never going to vote for a woman, much less a Black woman.

But in the end, a majority of American voters chose Trump because they wanted what he was selling: a nonstop reality show of rage and resentment. Some Democrats, still gripped by the lure of wonkery, continue to scratch their heads over which policy proposals might have unlocked more votes, but that was always a mug’s game. Trump voters never cared about policies, and he rarely gave them any. (Choosing to be eaten by a shark rather than electrocuted might be a personal preference, but it’s not a policy.) His rallies involved long rants about the way he’s been treated, like a giant therapy session or a huge family gathering around a bellowing, impaired grandpa.

Back in 2021, I wrote a book about the rise of “illiberal populism,” the self-destructive tendency in some nations that leads people to participate in democratic institutions such as voting while being hostile to democracy itself, casting ballots primarily to punish other people and to curtail everyone’s rights—even their own. These movements are sometimes led by fantastically wealthy faux populists who hoodwink gullible voters by promising to solve a litany of problems that always seem to involve money, immigrants, and minorities. The appeals from these charlatans resonate most not among the very poor, but among a bored, relatively well-off middle class, usually those who are deeply uncomfortable with racial and demographic changes in their own countries.

And so it came to pass: Last night, a gaggle of millionaires and billionaires grinned and applauded for Trump. They were part of an alliance with the very people another Trump term would hurt—the young, minorities, and working families among them.

Trump, as he has shown repeatedly over the years, couldn’t care less about any of these groups. He ran for office to seize control of the apparatus of government and to evade judicial accountability for his previous actions as president. Once he is safe, he will embark on the other project he seems to truly care about: the destruction of the rule of law and any other impediments to enlarging his power.

Americans who wish to stop Trump in this assault on the American constitutional order, then, should get it out of their heads that this election could have been won if only a better candidate had made a better pitch to a few thousand people in Pennsylvania. Biden, too old and tired to mount a proper campaign, likely would have lost worse than Harris; more to the point, there was nothing even a more invigorated Biden or a less, you know, female alternative could have offered. Racial grievances, dissatisfaction with life’s travails (including substance addiction and lack of education), and resentment toward the villainous elites in faraway cities cannot be placated by housing policy or interest-rate cuts.

No candidate can reason about facts and policies with voters who have no real interest in such things. They like the promises of social revenge that flow from Trump, the tough-guy rhetoric, the simplistic “I will fix it” solutions. And he’s interesting to them, because he supports and encourages their conspiracist beliefs. (I knew Harris was in trouble when I was in Pennsylvania last week for an event and a fairly well-off business owner, who was an ardent Trump supporter, told me that Michelle Obama had conspired with the Canadians to change the state’s vote tally in 2020. And that wasn’t even the weirdest part of the conversation.)

As Jonathan Last, editor of The Bulwark, put it in a social-media post last night: The election went the way it did “because America wanted Trump. That’s it. People reaching to construct [policy] alibis for the public because they don’t want to grapple with this are whistling past the graveyard.” Last worries that we might now be in a transition to authoritarianism of the kind Russia went through in the 1990s, but I visited Russia often in those days, and much of the Russian democratic implosion was driven by genuinely brutal economic conditions and the rapid collapse of basic public services. Americans have done this to themselves during a time of peace, prosperity, and astonishingly high living standards. An affluent society that thinks it is living in a hellscape is ripe for gulling by dictators who are willing to play along with such delusions.

The bright spot in all this is that Trump and his coterie must now govern. The last time around, Trump was surrounded by a small group of moderately competent people, and these adults basically put baby bumpers and pool noodles on all the sharp edges of government. This time, Trump will rule with greater power but fewer excuses, and he—and his voters—will have to own the messes and outrages he is already planning to create.

Those voters expect that Trump will hurt others and not them. They will likely be unpleasantly surprised, much as they were in Trump’s first term. (He was, after all, voted out of office for a reason.) For the moment, some number of them have memory-holed that experience and are pretending that his vicious attacks on other Americans are just so much hot air.

Trump, unfortunately, means most of what he says. In this election, he has triggered the unfocused ire and unfounded grievances of millions of voters. Soon we will learn whether he can still trigger their decency—if there is any to be found.