#people are in much better places than last season!!! but there's more to do!!
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weatherman667 · 20 hours ago
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Part XII - Food
Something near and dear to myself as a fat guy.
And something pretty much every historian gets wrong.
Well, how do I know history better than historians?
Historians only care about what was written down.
Archeology is a better source of food. Especially since archeologists will drink the bog mead and eat the tomb cheese.
People ate - everything - they could get their hands on. This limits the food to:
What is produced locally in the area.
What is either in season, preserved, or shelf stable.
What is not too expensive.
The too expensive is pretty easy, it's whatever was written down.
Here's a great example, 1950's.
People will often talk how terrible the food was. What was their source? Cook books. But, the reason it was in a cook book was that it wasn't a common recipe. People were more likely to eat meat + veggies + starch. How do you cook the meat? 350˚ oven, 1/2hr per pound.
What happened in the 1950's was a sudden influx of new ingredients, the creation of new technology, and things that were formerly only available to the rich suddenly became cheap enough to try. This is why they had all of the outlandish recipes, as the middle classes could now try these weird, rich things.
My mother, when she was growing up, learned to cook on a wood-fired oven.
The most common form for cooking in history as the hearth. The hearth consists of a flat rock that you build a fire on. You would normally surround it by stone or masonry to keep the fire contained. You either have a smoke hole in the roof, or just let it filter through the thatch. If the hearthstone is big enough, you build the house - around - it.
The reason why a pot for cooking shares the same root as pottery is that pots were originally ceramic. Ceramic is both a good insulator, and has a high heat capacity to hold in the heat. This makes it almost perfect for cooking on an open fire, keeping the temperature even. Metal pots and dutch ovens were a sign of wealth.
So, the choices for most people were in a pot over an open fire, or on a stick over and open fire, or suspended high above the open fire so it's mostly smoke and not heat.
Proper ovens were expensive, and so only found in cities, or among wealthy individuals, like bakers.
Corn when properly processed last forever, (as long as they are kept dry). Corn is the edible seeds from grasses, like wheat, barley, and oats in England. Rice and Maize also qualify.
Roots and tubers can last a year if kept it a cold, dry, dark place.
Vegetables are a different story, and often only last a single season, (or even much shorter time), if not pickled.
Meat has an extremely short shelf-life, unless cured, (salt) and smoked, in which case it lasts for almost ever.
And worst, fire. Without modern mechanisms, creating fire was extremely difficult. It was time consuming and taxing, and even if you do have modern lighters, it can still be time consuming and taxing. So, a lot of ancient civilizations would have someone who's job is firekeeper, (Dark Souls is about the primeval fear that the fire - might - go out). So, the fire was just kept going, forever. The Vestal Virgins of Rome were literally tasked with maintained the symbolic hearth of Rome.
All of those movies where they walk in and there's a fire in the background cooking a pot is... very accurate. Pots were often left on the stove for days, if not forever. And by forever, I mean
A batch of pot-au-feu was claimed by one writer to be maintained as a perpetual stew in Perpignan from the 15th century until World War II, when it ran out of ingredients to keep the stew going due to the German occupation.
--Wikipedia
And by foodsafe, as long as it is kept at 60˚F, which is barely simmering, it's perfectly safe to do this, forever.
As for bread, wheat was the goal of all civilization, and even then, the gluten in bread was dramatically increased in the US. So, while bread was common, but nowhere near as fluffy without the gluten. If they didn't have wheat, they would make something similar to pancake, which it seems like almost every single society has something similar.
Every family would have a grain ark. You would often have a larder, where meat was covered in fat for protection, (it effectively creates an air-proof barrier). Every family had a pig, as you could feed it food scraps, which it turns into pork. Some towns would have a municipal swineherd, who's job was to gather up the pigs and take them to the woods for foraging. The Roman standard, meaning the European standard when considering woodlands for tax purposes was how many pigs they could forage. Having a milk animals was the goal of most families. A calf can be bought for a few hundred, and it takes $20-ish dollars per day to feed. And they produced like 18L of milk per day. Chickens were typically not eaten, but kept for eggs. Or you can get a rope and a bucket and climb up/down a cliff to steal them from the birds that fish there. Wild game was freely available, until lords restricted it's use. You just had to hunt it and kill it, or pay a hunter to do it for you. Everyone with a square food of land had an herb/vegetable garden.
Most rent was paid in either work or grain, and the work was often to harvest the lord's own grain. If we take Grain as a general category, then it is the most common currency in Human history. Which is why it makes so much sense for Cybertronians to use Energon.
You Want to Make a Fantasy World: Part I - Magick
The first thing you need to decide when making a fantasy world is how magick works.
That might seem heady, but let's go over what you have to decide:
Who can use magick.
How do they use magick.
And how powerful can magick get.
Do you want 9th level magick, that can rip a giant hole in the world and summon unkillable monsters?
Because, honestly, you don't need it.
Can 9th level magick only be used by decrepid old wizards with one foot in their grave? Only it be used by chosen heroes? Only be by inhuman things, like Dragons and Daemons and Liches?
Low level but common magick can have a huge effect on the setting. Being able to light a fire can allow you to save the time and effort it takes to start a fire. Heating a rock can be used to heat a home, or even a bath, giving the equivalent of modern sanitation. Hand washing, bathing, and toilets have done the most for Human longevity. Can you go to a priest, give him a penny, and have him cure your cancer?
Sure, curing cancer isn't as cool as curing sword wounds, but the medical effects it can have on longevity are staggering.
Maybe magic is something that can only be done by a minority of the population, that dedicate themselves to the study.
None of them are wrong answers, so long as they are CONSISTENT.
If magickal ability depends on your bloodline, then someone, somewhere is going to think it's a good idea to selectively breed mages to keep the magics strong. The mages might become the noble classes, they might form their own class, which they breed endogenously, like Hindus.
If only inhuman things can cast upper level magick, and you see a seemingly ordinary Human cast that kind of magick, then guess what? He's not actually an ordinary Human.
Does magick need a physical catalyst? Does it consume reagents? How rare are these reagents? Do they come in one of a few types, or is every twig of berries a reagent for a different spell? Maybe upper level spells require expensive reagents, and that's the limiting factor? Maybe these spells use too much mana, and therefore can only be done by places of power?
Does teleportation require Line of Sight? Can you open long-range portals only if you have local knowledge? Can you target places of power from a distance?
We start with the simple, coarse questions, and get to the finer ones later on. When? When you come up with a good idea for how it works? Or, honestly, when you need to use it. It's perfectly fine to wait until the characters need/want to teleport to decide how it functions.
Another way to limit spells if by giving the heroes a rare magickal item. Why can they use portals?, because they have the Staff of the Herald. Why do they have the staff of the herald?
Given by someone important.
Monster loot.
They found it in an old, abandoned building.
They earned it by accomplishing some feat, or level of training.
Again, all you have to decide is how rare the item is, and maybe if you need some sort of innate/trained ability to use it.
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blackjack-15 · 1 year ago
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syd you're doing great! and carmy on her right hand the whole shot, i'm so happy
using the notes! and richie working the tables! amazing!!
it's tense but it's good. carmy getting between marcus and syd (marcus baby you gotta chill it's okay she said no) was beautifully done -- firm, no yelling, and he's back at syd's right hand. where the EFF is josh carmy can't cover two stations all night
wheels are coming off. carmy off to serve, syd angry about it, and things are going Off
carmy now is not the time to hallucinate chef joel. please baby
good deescalation there. and tina picking up the 'i'm sorry' ASL. beautifully done
NO CARMY'S IN THE FRIDGE. EFF
okay that was an effing rush. richie is incredible, syd's incredible, tina's incredible -- everyone pulled together, well done
all season carmy was sending people out to be trained, keeping people on focus, etc etc. and they can operate! he did it! he has a functioning kitchen!
but he feels like he failed everyone. this poor boy.
and of course it's not the NYC chef. but carmy's so haunted it doesn't matter.
CLAIRE YOU SHOULD NOT BE GOING BACK THERE. like fak what the eff you don't tell her he's in the walk in, but hey, true to form, she wasn't accepting 'no' for an answer, so...
yeah. so if you hear your boyfriend who you Love So Much having a complete mental breakdown, you...let him know you're sad and then walk away? ooh. ooooh. absolutely not. go eff yourself claire
richie now is not the time to white knight. i get the protectiveness, richie's like that, and he's mad b/c he wants carmy to have Nice Things, but like. calling him donna? absolutely not called for. he's immediately sorry, but the damage is done. there's gonna be a Talk about that next season i'm feeling -- those two are family but they're dysfunctional family
lovely scene with syd and her dad!
MARCUS NO YOUR PHONE. MARCUS. MARCUS YOUR STICKS
incredible closer. give season 3. get carmy out of the EFFING FREEZER please
can we please see the last of claire soon, and let's get back to the kitchen. the bear's got a lot more to do.
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adore-gregor · 3 months ago
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Lol I keep on doing this, saying I'd come back to tumblr to only disappear again 😂😭
#and i hate it bc i miss being on here#but also i don't have to force myself or feel guilty for it#bc if i'm fr being on social media is just so time consuming and also not what is good for my mental health often#and that includes tumblr#it's not even that it's a toxic place (at least not the content i'm consuming) but sometimes i just rather spend my time with people irl#meeting someone than on social media and like focus on my life#the last month or so was just really difficult for me and i haven't been feeling so bad mentally in forever#i mean it always is like that that time of the year but i feel like i was worse this year#whenever autumn comes around with the darkness and cold i seem to hit a low mentally#when i tell you how much better my mood is in summer spring how much better i feel everyday regardless of everything else#i get people like autumn but for me its literally the worst and winter too altough at some point it gets better#maybe i adapt and maybe because i spend more time outside around christmas when i go home that's usually a turning point#and ig also the lights of december make it a bit better#but mid october to november is awful#this year the weather was much worse beginning of october was much worse#i feel like i lowkey have this seasonal mood disorder idk#but i barely managed to go to classes and i had no motivation#usually i always make myself study and do the things i have to atleast altough i often terribly procrastinate#but now i was barely able to do this and i had things to do but i couldn't make myself i missed a deadline closely#luckily my professors are the best but i felt so horrible for it how i was unable to get it done#sunlight is just so good for my mood and ik how doctors say how you should avoid it because you can get skincancer#but like i'd rather than my mental health being this bad (not that i want either)#i already miss summer so much and being happier#but tbh i haven't felt this good as I do today in weeks and even this whole week was better#i exercised more than usual altough i tried to in the last weeks i couldn't as often as i normally do so maybe this actually helps a lot#and i studied yesterday today and i will tomorrow i finally feel motivation again#besides i also tried to break up with my bf so that was also tough but i couldn't lol#i tried talking to him and tell him in the nicest way but he didn't get what i was trying to do and i couldn't say more bc i felt horrible#but maybe that's for the better altough i had these thoughts for a while that he just isn't the one for me and that we're too different...#i do really like him as a person the way he treats me and i'm still into him but i just felt like it wouldn't work
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the-physicality · 5 months ago
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#it seems disingenuous to suggest that n*te should be ***** if other orgs are doing that to their hc#we had a better record than last year and yes there are things to improve#but we did have a lot of injury#and I do think there was some Indecisiveness on the part of roster construction#like you either have to commit to running 4 guards and no 4 and being ok with the lack of rebounding#or you have to get a real 4 not just when#you start to doubt#and I think that is why with the exception of 2-3 players (depending on if you count Sophie as a starter or not) our whole bench changed#I think we ended with a stronger bench but we probably played more games with 8 or fewer available#than we did with more than 10#and the issue is the way the mercury offense was set up was to have 4 players on the floor be threats from 3#and when you add a 4 for rebounding but who doesn’t have a 3 it messes up the system#and the indecisiveness also happened at the start of the season#they added people back who they liked at camp but got cut because they wanted more size when bg was out#and on top of not having starters who played a whole season you also have a bench that isn’t as cohesive#and the merc via tash have said this was a 2 year process#and yes the Olympics fucked us over as did the post Olympic schedule#fundamentally I think the right move is to keep in place hc who have only had one year and dealt with a lot of injury#could this team have got it all with someone like sandy ot Steph#maybe or maybe could have gone further#but in their absence who do you want who would you rather have#me idk#but like to me I would rather have an owner that spends a ton of money with some startup vibes than someone who has no long term plan#so please not too much on girldad
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arundolyn · 8 months ago
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replaying twdg for genuinely the first time since it came out and MANNNNNN. playing this game with a fully cooked brain. theres some good writing in there. some of the foreshadowing and stuff. oof
#crow.txt#twdgposting#i guess sure#and i forgot baby clem is like. pretty well written as a kid character goes thats easy to fuck up#SHES JUST A LITTLE BABY THING AUAUAUAUUAUU CLEMMMMMMMMMMM.#we poppin the biggest bottles when fucking larry dies i cannot stand this fucking man at all i need him to die faster i need him to explode#i forgot he dies like Literally next episode but thats not fast enough#i forgot the st johns insane shit is episode 2 like MAN it feels like more shit happens before then#bc so much happens There. my GOD.#who up impaling andy st john with a pitchfork. can i get a hell yeah#oh shit the train one is third. goddamn season 1 always felt so much longer than it was#but i guess it was just that i was like.. 12 whenit came out or whatever#but some of the writinggggg ugh like#'aw that was my dad's cane. that thing was used to defend this place better than any guard dog'#and then using the cane to barricade the door when they were leaving......... waahahhhhhhhahhhhhhhhh..#this wasnt writing but when clem was asking about the cane bc shes Six Years Old and Baby#my bf said something like 'her legs work shes fine'#giggled. foreshadowing is a literary device-#also the parallel of lee clarifying that hes not clem's dad all the time when people assume that#and clem doing the same for aj constantly in the last season. wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh the parallels.#something poignant about a convicted murderer with a life sentence being the most sane decent guy in the apocalypse yknow#i love lee soooooo much i will throw the fuck up#lee everett will see a tiny baby stranded alone and say anyone gonna adopt her and not wait for an answer#the first time i played this i didnt pick up that the voicemails from her parents. her dad was bit they were dead before this started. oof
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friendshiptothemax · 2 years ago
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I was on a plane this weekend, and I was chatting with the woman sitting next to me about an upcoming writer’s strike. “Do you really think you’re mistreated?” she asked me.
That’s not the issue at stake here. Let me tell you a little something about “minirooms.”
Minirooms are a way of television writing that is becoming more common. Basically, the studio will hire a small group of writers, 3-6 or so, and employ them for just a few weeks. In those few weeks (six weeks seem to be common), they have to hurriedly figure out as much about the show as they can -- characters, plots, outlines for episodes. Then at the end of the six weeks, all the writers are fired except for the showrunner, who has to write the entire series themselves based on the outlines.
This is not a widespread practice, but it has become more common over the past couple of years. Studios like it because instead of paying for a full room for the full length of the show, they just pay a handful of writers for a fraction of the show. It’s not a huge problem now, but the WGA only gets the chance to make rules every three years -- if we let this go for another three years and it becomes the norm? That would be DEVASTATING for the tv writing profession.
Do I feel like I’m mistreated? No. I LOVE my job! But in a world of minirooms, there is no place for someone like me -- a mid-level writer who makes a decent living working on someone else’s show (I’d like to be a showrunner someday, but for now I feel like I still have a lot to learn, and my husband and I are trying to start a family so I like not being support rather than the leader for now). In a miniroom, there are only two levels -- the handful of glorified idea people who are already scrambling to find their next show because you can’t make a decent living off of one six-week job (and since there are fewer people per room, there are fewer jobs overall, even at the six-week amount), and the overworked, stressed as fuck showrunner who is going to have to write the entire thing themselves. Besides being bad for me making a living, I also just think it’s plain bad for television as an art form -- what I like about TV is how adaptable it is, how a whole group of people come together to tell a story better than what any of them could do on their own. Plus the showrunner can’t do their best work under all of that pressure, episode after episode, back to back. Minirooms just...fucking suck.
The WGA is proposing two things to fix this -- a rule that writers have to be employed for the entire show, and a rule tying the number of writers in the room to the number of episodes you have per season. I don’t think it’s unreasonable. It’s the way shows have run since the advent of television. It’s only in the last couple of years that this has become a new thing. It’s exploitative. It squeezes out everyone except showrunners and people who have the financial means to work only a few months a year. It makes television worse. And that is the issue in this strike that means everything to me, and that is why I voted yes on the strike authorization vote.
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postracehair · 3 months ago
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a small request
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
max verstappen x reader | 2k
even world champions deserve love letters. after missing the mexico gp, you're determined to see max have a good weekend in brazil. maybe all it takes is a handwritten note.
cw: fem!reader, being in love, softness, a track-side kiss, love letters. and google translate, sorry to any dutch speakers.
a/n: was this inspired by that video from austin? yeah, it was! sue me! also, written/posted before the gp, so. no race details <3 xx
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You miss race weekend in Mexico. It happens. You can't be there every weekend, much as you'd like to be. You're even more peeved about it after, considering you quite like Carlos and wish you had seen him earn what very well might be his last win with Ferrari. But you're mostly upset because Max, though he won't say so, could probably have used your support.
Years of experience have him calm, cool, and collected despite the team troubles. Flippant, some headlines say. Mad Max, others. But you know he's probably just tired. Tired of the media, of the FIA, of the churning conflict between him and Lando -- something you all knew was coming someday, but maybe not so suddenly. The longest season ever continues to drag and drag and drag.
"Twenty seconds was...Christ, Max," you say. You know what happened, of course. You watched what you could, saw the sharp moves around the corner and heard the radios. It never gets easier, watching him take risks like that. Usually, everyone else backs off, but McLaren can see victory on the horizon and won't let it go. You can't blame them, either of them, you just wish it was all a bit less tense.
"I know," he says, voice raspy over the connection. "I -- well, you know how I feel about it. Don't want to say anything in case the FIA is tapping my phone."
You laugh into your hand so you don't disturb the other people in the airline lounge, not entirely used to places like this, still. Max has told you over and over that it's absurd for you to spend your own money when you're coming to see him all over the world. When you told him you moved things around so you could come to Brazil, he booked you the nicest ticket, per usual.
"Oh, ha, ha," you say. "Don't give them any ideas, Mr. Community Service." You sigh. "Do you need anything? Be honest."
"Aren't you at the airport already? Your flight should be leaving in --" A pause, like he's checking his watch -- "forty minutes."
You glance up at the departures screen. He's right, but you don't give it to him so easily. "Know my schedule, do you?"
"Well, I booked your ticket, so I should think so."
"Your assistant booked it, you mean."
He hums and you picture him in his hotel room, maybe at the window, looking over the city. "I know your flight information. Don't be silly."
"I mean it, Max," you say again. "Is there anything I can do to make the weekend better?" It's a bit of a useless question and you expect him to answer with a snarky get me a new car or apply for the position of steward.
But he doesn't. He clears his throat.
"I'm just glad you're coming," he says, softly. "I've missed you."
You never doubt how Max feels about you, but he must be pretty tired to admit it like this. He's all about actions, this man. Making sure you have what you need when you're at the track, arranging your travel, remembering your schedule. He shows you how much you matter, and that's more than enough. He never wants to make you feel bad for having a life beyond being his girlfriend. And this doesn't, not really. It just makes you ache, fills your chest with the hopeless affection you've felt for him for so long.
"I've missed you, too," you reply. "But I'd like to be useful."
"Oh, I can think of a few things, then," Max says, all of a sudden all cheek. Such a boy, sometimes. A boy in love.
You can't help but laugh, face hot. "Hush, you!"
He huffs. A few beats of silence, the comfortable, well-worn kind. Sometimes, when he's halfway across the world and up late on the sim, he'll call you just to hear you breathe.
"Max?"
"I -- do you remember what you did for my birthday?"
He'd wanted something small, quiet. There was a lot of work to be done with the team but three weekends off meant you had a little time to yourselves. A few days hardly leaving his place, a dinner with some of the guys, a cake you made yourself, hand-delivered in bed. Gifts for a very wealthy man are difficult, especially since Max doesn't seem to want much.
"Oh, the pillow with my face on it?"
Max laughs. The lounge loudspeaker announces that your flight is going to board soon, so you gather your things but keep your phone wedged next to your ear.
"No, the other thing," he says. He clears his throat and summons some of that World Champion courage. "The letter."
You'd written him a fairly long love letter, thinking it would be a nice thing to carry to the races you couldn't be at this fall. It was tempting to be embarrassed about it when you gave it to him the morning of his birthday, but his cheeks had gone pink and he'd buried his face in your neck.
"Oh, that," you say. The airport is busier outside the lounge and you push your case in the direction of your gate weaving between. people.
"You could write me another, maybe."
Max is direct. He is honest, at work and at home, but this surprises you a little.
"You do know I'm about to get on a plane to see you, right?"
He huffs, and you imagine his cheeks pink, eyes bright. "You asked!"
"I'll write you another love letter, Max Verstappen," you assure him. "I'll write you a hundred."
"One is a fine start," he says firmly. "You should be boarding soon, and I've got to go to the press conference. Text me when you've landed?"
"Of course," you reply, eyes rolling though he can't see. "I'll see you soon, okay? Love you."
"Love you, liefje."
On the plane, you tear out some pages from your journal. You'd prefer to have some nice stationery like what you wrote on for his birthday, but maybe this is more romantic, more real. Making do with that you've got because he asked.
In the last one, you told him your memories of when you first met. How your stomach swooped when you made him laugh, how his blue eyes wouldn't leave your dreams. In this one you tell him about when you first realized you loved him. How absurdly early you were sure, how badly you wanted to tell him for weeks. The way you remember every second of when you blurted it out -- his face, his smile. His voice in your ear, telling you over and over, geliefde, ik houd van je, zo veel. I love you, so much.
"You're working hard on that," someone says. You look up at your seatmate, a woman a few decades older than you with a heavy accent.
You feel a little like you've been caught doing something illicit, but you just smile at her. "For my boyfriend," you tell her. "A love letter."
She flattens her palm over heart and sighs. "How lovely," she coos. "I hope he takes care of you, too."
We take care of each other, you want to say. You could tell her about how he sends you postcards from every country he goes to after you told him you like to put them on your fridge. You could tell her how sometimes you text him during his streams to make him laugh on camera. How he remembers your favorites, how he saves you his special team gear, how he sends you flowers all the time. How he likes to sit on the couch, your toes under his thigh, fingers around your ankle. How you've been learning Dutch and how he patiently corrects your pronunciation. You could go on and on and on.
"He does," you say instead.
__
The plane lands safely in Brazil, but the pilot tells you that there is no open gate and that you'll be sitting for a while. You text Max.
stuck on tarmac, will be later than expected! :(
He must be in media responsibilities still because he doesn't reply until you finally get off the plane.
go relax at the hotel. i'll see you for dinner!
You find your ride easy enough and take a deep breath. The letter you wrote on the plane feels heavy in your pocket, and you just want to see Max. To be near him again. To give him this small thing he asked for.
"Excuse me," you say to the driver. "Do you think we could go to the track, instead?"
You text Max's assistant to say you're headed there, hoping it's not too much of an inconvenience. You're told he's almost done, maybe an hour left, and when you arrive you're led to his driver rooms. His shit is everywhere, per usual. Max is quite neat except in here -- Carmen once told you that George is the same. Clothes strewn about, his race boots unlaced and left in the way, warm-up equipment in a pile. On the table are a few of his things -- his wallet, a notebook, some papers.
Wait a second. One of those papers looks...familiar. It's been folded in three, the envelope it came in nowhere to be seen. His name is scrawled on the blank side in your hand and when you tug it from the pile you can see that it's creased, the edges a little more worn than when you gave it to him a few months ago. Max Verstappen, three-time World Champion, actually carries around the love letter you wrote him. Brings it to the track. It's darling. You love him so much. You pull the new one from your pocket and set them side-by-side on the table where he'll find them.
You ask to be taken to the pit wall, please, so you can see whatever the drivers are doing on track. Some dedication, you're told. The timing ends up being perfect and you get there just as they're finishing. You lean on a gap in the barrier where, on Sunday, crew members will be holding timing signs as the drivers zip around the hot pavement. The crowd in the stands is loud, as always, and maybe you imagine it but it seems to get a little louder when you look out.
The guys are talking amongst themselves and a few of them wave at you. You spot Max as he turns away from Charles and you can't help but grin. His eyes meet yours under his cap and his entire face chances, softens, and he breaks into a jog. You lean out over the concrete ledge and meet him in a kiss that's more two smiles pressed together than anything else.
"This is a surprise," he says when he pulls away. Eyes sparkling, he shows no signs of rejoining the other drivers as they head to whatever their next thing is. Photos, probably.
"I missed you," you tell him. "I've left you something in your room."
"Oh?" He straightens the lanyard of your credentials with careful fingers.
You reach for him, palm on his cheek. His stubble tickles and he leans into it ever so slightly. It doesn't feel like there are thousands of eyes on you, not even a little.
"Yeah," you say. "As promised." Someone calls his name. "Go on, then. I'll be waiting."
He kisses you again, a quick brush of his lips on the corner of your mouth.
Later, you'll wake from your nap in the hotel room to those same kisses on your cheeks, your forehead. Max will gather you in his arms and tell you all the moments he almost told you he loved you, how he could hardly believe when you said it first. You'll tease him for how many times he's read that first letter and he'll cheekily say that's why he needs more. And you will write him more, you'll write him as many as he wants. As many as you can, for the rest of your lives.
But now, in front of thousands of screaming fans, he smiles at only you, boyish and pleased.
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fangbanger3000 · 20 days ago
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we need to talk about The Silence and The Song
[PLEASE READ] edit to add: i realise that this post has been reblogged far and wide and that there is not a lot i can do about it now, but this is me trying anyway.
posting examples from the fic about my issues with its repetitive structure was careless of me, and i apologise to those of you who read it and became insecure about your own writing style. as someone who has worked with ai in academic settings, it's incredibly difficult for me to explain to you how the tone and structure of ai-generated fiction works and how, after reading enough of it, you can simply just tell. i do also realise that this is an incredibly weak argument, which is why i didn't include it when i originally wrote this post.
all that to say: there is an enormous difference between "beginner's writing" and ai writing. being repetitive as a new writer (or a seasoned one who just likes using repetition) is so normal. as is flowery/purple language. i've read hundreds of books and fics and the difference between these traits in ai-text and actual works is starkly clear. please don't feel anxious over the examples i've used in this post.
again, i apologise for any distress i have caused.
as per my last post, i have received a lot of encouragement to go public with this, and the more disappointed people i have in my dms, the angrier i get. so i will.
the silence and the song is an ancient arlathan au DA fic on ao3 by luxannaslut, and it is partly, if not entirely, written by an ai. i have no wish to be involved in any kind of fandom drama or witch hunting or bullying, but as a writer myself there are few things that piss me off more than watching people steal the work of others because they can't be fucked to write. it's disrespectful to your fellow writers, it's disrespectful to your readers, and it's disrespectful to the authors of the works the ai is stealing from.
ai is a plague that has no business being in creative spaces and you must do better.
the writing pattern
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there was something very odd and monotone about the sentence structure of tsats that i couldn't quite place, so i fed chatgpt a prompt along the lines of "two people in a fantasy novel hate each other, but they secretly desire one another, and they kiss", and the screenshots above are the results. the third one is an excerpt from chapter 40 of tsats. the writing pattern is identical and it doesn't seem like the "writer" has even bothered to pretend they wrote it. if you're going to use ai, at least be sneaky about it. you know, paraphrase a little.
nonsense descriptions
"her nimble fingers worked with quiet precision" (ct. 1), "his grip firm but tender" (ct. 33), "her gown pooling around her like embers" (ct. 1).
fingers don't make sound, so what does quiet precision mean? as opposed to what? her joints cracking with every movement? how is a grip firm but tender? what does that mean? since when do embers pool?
the entire fic is littered with these adjectives that contradict each other or just straight up do not make sense, because all an ai does is generate descriptive language with no understanding of what the words it's spitting out actually mean. i could spend hours picking out examples from the seven billion pages worth of text, but i quite frankly have better things to do and would simply challenge you to try getting through a chapter or two without noticing the pattern.
repetition at structure-level
all the scenes in this fic are described in pretty much the same way. they open with purple prose vomit of the surroundings; solas is standing somewhere looking "unreadable as ever"; ellana's fiery golden molten fire copper ember ginger red hair is flowing this and that way; there's some dialogue with whoever is present and it leaves ellana feeling different variations of "something she couldn't name". this is, once again, a blatantly obvious sign of ai. below is the result of me feeding chatgpt the line "write me a scene from a fantasy novel where a woman with red hair is sitting on the ground in a magical garden at night", and side by side with that is the opening scene of the fic. make your own judgement.
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repetition at word-level
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this one speaks for itself. we fucking get it. her dress is orange, her hair is red, mythal's presence is heavy in the room, solas looks unreadable, compassion is sitting on her head like a crown, solas' ears are betraying him and ellana's move with every thought she thinks. we get it. the issue here is that an ai remembers the info you feed it, but not necessarily the info it shits out. if it's being told to write scene after scene of an elven woman with a gown that looks like fire doing xyz, it's going to do so with no regard for how many times the reader has already been informed of these details.
lastly: the breakneck speed
359,6k words in four weeks by a person who allegedly is employed and married and hasn't pre-written anything? no. any writer will tell you that this simply isn't possible. it absolutely infuriates me to see how much praise this "writer" gets for posting up to three full chapters in a day without anyone calling bullshit. i am pulling out my hair, you guys.
why i'm not going to live and let live this one
perhaps i would be less angry if the fic was some silly bullshit court intrigue Y/A stuff, but this is a text that handles very heavy and triggering topics such as SA, coercion, domestic abuse, and other things of the same vein. to sit back and put your feet up while having a robot write these extremely sensitive and very real human experiences with words it has stolen from texts written by actual persons is fucking heinous. the "writer" should be deeply ashamed of themselves and i'm sick and tired of watching people eat up their bs.
and on that note: the amount of people in my dm's telling me that they feel stupid and naive for not clocking this has infuriated me more than anything else. you're not foolish for this. being fed ai-generated bullshit is not what is supposed to happen on any creative platform and much less a fandom-centred one, so of course no one approaches a fic through that lens. fandom and fic writing is supposed to be about passion and the only person in this situation who needs to do better and change their behaviour is luxannaslut. polluting our creative spaces, wasting the time of your readers, and minimising the effort of actual writers who are working hard to provide content for us all to share and enjoy is vile and so, so lazy. i beg of you: do better.
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thinkinonsense · 4 months ago
Text
Bewitched: The Rake and The Risk
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˖⋆࿐໋ james logan howlett ✦ bridgerton au series
bewitched masterlist
chapter two
cw: flirting (mix of 1800s and modern day), jealousy, old time thoughts of women and marriage, james is a slut
pairing: viscount!logan howlett x fem!reader
a/n: sorry this is later than intended! i try to aim for a new chapter every friday but college is kicking my ass right now. next chapter will be longer!! also!! if you want to be tagged for the bewitched series please comment on the original bewitched masterlist post linked above this<3 there are so many of you lovely readers who want to be tagged and i need a more organized way to find everyone to add. sorry for the minor inconvenience. i appreciate every one of you!!
main masterlist
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in all the twenty-nine years of knowing james howlett, lady chamberlain never would have pictured him coming to her home to ask about the eligible bachelorettes of the ton.
"what do you want to know, my dear?" lady chamberlain asked, sipping a cup of tea as the two of them sat in the living room.
"i am coming to you because as you know, my mother is expecting me to wed sooner rather than later and i was wondering whom might be the best women to seek out this season." james said, lying through his teeth.
if james really wanted to know who the best women this season were, he would've just opened the latest issue of lady cavanaugh. both of them knew this but it was more fun for lady chamberlain to tease the viscount.
"hm.." she smiles. "anyone in particular?"
"no."
the lie falls with ease. too much ease but lady chamberlain sees right through him.
"well, i did take note last night that the only lady you danced with was lady worthington's niece." she remarks slyly.
"the french girl?" he asks, playing coy. "i think i remember her."
lady chamberlain wasn't going to play games with the boy in front of her.
"i would hope so, you seemed quite fawned of her."
"i don't know if i would say that much."
"hm, so you don't want to know who she's planning to attended the mask ball with?" lady chamberlain smirks, knowing she's got him hooked.
everyone in the ton looked forward to the queens mask ball each season. it was the perfect way to help break the usual ice of finding 'the one'. that's where most couples tend to meet for the first time.
"let me guess..." james rolls his eyes. "prince harrison?"
lady chamberlain shrugs, placing her tea cup back on the dish. "the two of them talked quite a bit after you stormed off. she seems quite smitten with him."
"it's the first ball of the season. she has plenty of time to look for a better husband." he scoffs.
"well, dear... there are people who search their whole lives for something that's been right in front of them the entire time."
the elderly woman's words rang true in the room but james was far too in denial to notice them. instead, his ego was eating him alive. why would you not jump at the opportunity to be with the viscount?
˖⋆࿐໋
this afternoon was the queen's annual tea party. all the ton's debutantes gather to make friends and share their predictions for this season. anxiously, you paced the cobblestones outside, waiting for the carriage to pick you up.
"dear, it's not lady-like to pace back and forth." your aunt calls out from the doorway.
"my apologies," you reply, not stopping your feet.
"you're snagging the hem of your gown!"
thank heavens that the carriage was approaching. she waves you off, wishing you luck on your first adventure alone in the ton, wishing desperately she could join you.
your goal today is to make at least one friend. you'll even settle for an allied.
once you arrive at the queen's castle, you step inside. covered in soft pastels, flowers, and butterflies; you immediately feel calm. everyone is chatting and sipping tea at the tables. you sit down in the first available seat.
"you're the diamond, correct?" someone whispered next to you asks.
you turn your head to see a blonde girl to the right. she's wearing a soft yellow dress that doesn't quite fit her right.
"correct." you nod, offering the girl a smile to which she returns.
"shouldn't you be sat with the queen?" she asks, nodding to one of the beautiful girls surrounding the queen.
"probably but this was the first seat i saw." you joke, sipping on your tea.
the girl laughs with a small nod and introduces herself. her name is bridget and her father is a jewelry maker for the queen.
"i saw you dancing with the viscount last night at the ball." she smiles. "do you fancy him?"
almost choking on your tea, you shake your head.
"no, no, no. i don't fancy the viscount." you state.
bridget hesitates, watching your body language closely. the pressure gets you to speak up again.
"why do you ask?"
"because the viscount is a major rake."
the word rake rolls off her tongue with pure disgust. you'd never heard someone with such respect as a viscount be called something so dishonorable. rakes were known for their ability to seduce and lead on women with no promise of marriage.
"but he talks of his desire for a wife?" you question, more to yourself than to bridget but alas, she answers anyway.
"only because his mama is practically begging for a viscountess." bridget whispers.
you suppose this made sense due to the fact that most rakes never even intend to wed and after your conversation with james last night, he made it clear that marriage was not something he craved.
"trust me, you aren't the first lady to attempt to tie down the viscount. well, at least you have a shot since you're the diamond this season and all." the blonde girl rambles.
"oh, heavens no!" you repeat.
"hm, that's sad..." she sighs. "he is quite handsome."
"most definitely but i intend to wed for pure reasons."
"if that's truly the case, stay as far away from the viscount as possible."
˖⋆࿐໋
for the rest of the afternoon, bridget's words stuck to the front of your brain. if james wasn't so intolerable, perhaps he would make a good husband to someone.
once everyone finished with their tea, you decided to go sketch in wisteria park. the weather was beautiful outside and gave you the perfect inspiration needed to work on a new piece. normally, you would only draw on the sides of the letters written to your father back home. no one was more supportive of you than your parents. in a world where women mean nothing more than their wombs to society, it was rare to have parents who let their daughters have dreams.
sat on a patch of grass near the small pond, you set up your quill, small tray of paints, and paper. in the area where you decided to sit, across from you stood a beautiful cherry tree. as you work on the outline, you can hear footsteps approaching.
"i should've known i would find you here." a familiar voice says.
you don't even glacé up at the person near you, paying no mind to the man who seeks your attention most.
"do you want something, my lord?" you ask, fighting the urge to roll your eyes.
james' head spun every time those last two words fell from your lips, sounding to pretty the way that they roll of your tongue.
"you may call me, logan." he says. "if you so wish."
"logan?" you cock a brow, finally looking up at him.
"it's my middle name." he replies awkwardly.
"hm..." you pretend to ponder for a moment. "that's far too personal for me."
" 'too personal'? how might that be?"
james stands arms crossed against the cherry tree, glaring in your direction. you don't rush to answer his question instead you continue adding details to the branches and trees. he huffs under his breath, clearly irritated your lack of interest in him.
"well, we have no intentions to be together this season and we aren't friends so, there's no need for nicknames and such." you reply nonchalantly.
"you don't know my intentions"
a sweet giggle escapes you. james brushes off the warmth flooding his chest, rather focusing on topic at hand.
"oh, i bet i do."
suddenly, you drop your quill and give him your undivided attention.
"why are you even here, james?" you sigh.
"i was visiting an old friend this morning and wanted a stroll through the park."
"an old friend?"
the words left your lips before you could stop yourself. james was quick to notice the tone shift. he smirks, walking over to you and sitting on the grass to your right.
"mhm..." he hums.
"is she viscountess material?" you scoff, returning to your scribbles.
"and why would you care?"
why did you care? it's not like the two of you really know each other; yet, something about james made your blood boil. perhaps it was how he has a near perfect life and somehow still complains. he has no issues in finding a partner because everyone wants him. if he didn't have his head up his own ass, he would realize that.
"i don't."
"sounds like you do."
james liked watching your face scrunch up at little with dislike for him. how your pressure on the quill increases. how you avoid his gaze. how you pretend he doesn't exist next to you.
"i don't." you repeat. "i just cannot believe that someone like you is complaining about having to take a wife when all the women of the ton are smitten with you."
"someone like me?" james pretends to be offended but he was too busy enjoying this riled up version of you.
"someone who never gone with unmet needs, never struggled financially, never been under minded or overlooked." your words come out sharp but james doesn't let them cut deep.
"look, sweetheart..." he squints those hazel eyes, glaring deep into your soul and leaning in closer than he should've. "you know nothing of my families struggles."
"and you know nothing of mine."
james was so close to you. your noses almost touching before you pull away. being within his close proximity made you feel a foreign warm tingle deep in your stomach.
thank heavens that the park was empty, minus the two of you. the last thing you needed was for someone to see the two of you this close and label you as one of the viscounts mistresses.
"i-i must get going." you stutter, collecting your belongings.
"where are you off to?" he asks.
"i'm supposed to be accompanying lady chamberlain and prince harrison to dinner this evening."
his face scrunches with distaste at the mention of the prince. also, why would lady chamberlain hide this piece of information from him?
"isn't it quite early to prepare for dinner?"
"i must look perfect for the prince." you smile.
but not at james. you're smiling for that no good excuse of a prince who couldn't see that you already were perfect.
"you look fine to me." he huffs.
"it's vocabulary like that, that keeps you from finding a wife."
"and to think it was my insufferable personality that kept the ladies of the ton away."
it's difficult to hide the laugh you want to let out. instead you bite down on your cheek, not giving him the satisfaction of your laughter.
"ha ha ha." you mock dryly.
"do you always have a stick up your ass?"
james question makes your jaw drop. never in your life have you heard a man speak so vulgarly.
"that's no way for a viscount to speak to a lady." you scold. he can't help but roll his eyes at your comment.
"i'm sure that a man has spoken even more colorfully to you."
"what are you insinuating, my lord?"
"that i highly doubt a lady such as yourself still has her virtue." he shrugs.
never has your head spun so fast at a single sentence. you couldn't fathom that a rake like him has the nerve to question anyone's virtue.
"excuse me, viscount howlett but my virtue is none of your business." you rage. "and you have quite the nerve to question it."
"and why's that?"
james was playing with fire but he didn't mind getting scorched by your flames.
"i've heard the stories about you."
"like what?"
"like what you do with the promiscuous women of the night." your words leave a smirk plastered on his face as he watches you intensely.
"don't act so innocent either." james hums. "i'm sure you've had your fair share of promiscuous adventures in france."
a flush of red hits at your cheeks. the last person you wanted to talk about promiscuous acts with is james. mostly because your lack there of. only your own hands have touched you so intimately.
james studies your facial expression before it clicks for him. he shouldn't ask. he really shouldn't. but come on, he has to.
"have you never—" his words come to a halt when there's a ruffled noise inching closer.
"i'm under no obligation to answer you, viscount howlett." you scold, collecting your belongings.
"hm... seems like you've already answered my question." his cocky tone sends you over the edge of annoyance.
"shouldn't you be more concerned with finding a wife rather than my virtue? this season will be over before you know it and you will need to find one sooner rather than later."
james admired the way you spoke with such sharpness. you were shy and reserved but the weight of your words were heavy. there was grace in the way you spoke and he loathed it.
he loathed how perfect you were. how absolutely perfect you would fit into his life. how perfect you would be at being his little wife. only needing to plan parties and open your womb to his child. he would never stop you from your dream of painting either. all he wants is someone who can handle the duties that come with being his other half.
by the time james snaps out of his thoughts, you are long gone. off to get ready for your date with a man who's twice as rich as him and much more likable. the only thing he could do is hope that nothing good comes from this dinner.
──★
i'll tag everyone else who commented in the morning when i wake up <3
tag list: @v3rdee @squishyfruitloop @caswithdasas2021 @espressopatronum454 @brittdead @fake-bleach @blossoming-hotch @hotbisexualmess @imaginecrushes @wh0re4steelblue-eyes @b0nes-n-all @tvdelrey @prettyoatmeal @speedyvoidlove @lunavelha @merrul @bubblegumholland @divinesols @seasonofthenerd @adoredire @gl0wingsl0wtown @imithicwolf @charityjoy22 @sun7lowxr @melsunshine @internetitgirl17 @tsumukei @dolliestprncess @st4rrlighttt @crypticcowboys @mirrorballpalo @princessanglophile @planetxella @battieshroomz @tonyhawkstits @shinyshayminflower @babey-fruit-bat @oraclic @glnnnhaps @criminaly-supernatural @pxrwinkle @im-nowhere-but-also-somewhere @tighrenicotine @midnightvitality @loonalockley @notbaldy420 @squishyfruitloop @summer-343 @reidshearts @marii-ren @fictionalmen-dilflover @brisingamenwearer @pedrohoe04 @taextannie @jrihensjd @tumharisakhi @readerofallthingss @etmoisara @paladinshenanigan-blog @hauntedwombateggmug @i-am-not-a-morning-person-83 @zaggprincess2 @atjlovverr @fallingfromjupiter @cards-and-daggers @reidsworld @imsuperbored @golden-ebony @joyfulpeanutsalad @mysticalmarvelousmagpie @thighridinglogan @pieuui @fanficcrow @alsoprettyinpink @rooroen @barbecuetiddy @potato-painter @milfhunter69sstuff @bel20blog @hypermarvellove @modicum-ofnothing @gemofthenight @laureniswolverine @d3ad2you @goldphish @mxtokko @ovohanna24 @i-voluntears @cherrypieyourface @petrichor-incorporation @csigirl3137 @justannie18 @yxtkiwiyxt @maddielovesurmom321 @madscape @mesopotamism @multifandom-boss-bitch @tecolote2755 @ririkacchi @crownofdecit @snow30285 @lenoradarkstriderr @willybillyletsgetsilly @sleepilysworld @mynatureworld @biiolumii @phantombaby @natlovesu @tumharisakhi @lokiswify @saph-cyare @burntsaltsblog @shedobeclownin @itsjuwulia @hazelwebster @cake-and-umbrellas @aureliusbrutus @loving-barnes @valorant-v @annagraceevanss @opheliaas-stuff @louisymomo @midnightvitality @ricespy123 @livingonsillylovesongs
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kaiyunsim · 24 days ago
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after the storm —
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pairing : bully!ni-ki x student!reader (no pronouns used)
summary : you run into the infamous bully, nishimura riki and eventually get partnered with him as well.
warnings : fluff, enemies-to-lovers, angst if you squint hard enough, featuring boynextdoor’s myung jaehyun, aespa’s karina, jay, jake, and heeseung.
a/n : first ‘long’ fic. i hope you guys enjoy it !! i love enemies to lovers so much :] (my gift to you guys during finals season)
queueing : after the storm - kali uchis, tyler the creator, bootsy collins
— wc : 5.4k — not proof read —
you don’t mean for it to happen. really, you don’t. but monday mornings are the worst, and the crowded hallways of your school aren’t much better. your arms are weighed down with textbooks, and you’re running late to class because karina begged you to grab coffee with her before school.
the chaos of the hallway hits you like a wave as you round the corner—students yelling, slamming lockers, rushing to class. you’re too focused on navigating the crowd to notice the tall figure directly in your path until it’s too late.
your shoulder collides with someone’s arm, and there’s a sudden, sharp gasp followed by the unmistakable sound of liquid spilling. you freeze, looking down to see a large coffee stain spreading across pristine white sneakers.
"you’ve got to be kidding me," comes the irritated voice, sharp and cutting. you look up to find yourself face-to-face with nishimura riki—or ni-ki, as everyone calls him.
he’s infamous. the type of guy who can get away with murder just by flashing his signature smirk. tall, broad-shouldered, and perpetually annoying, ni-ki has a reputation for making people’s lives just a little harder than they need to be.
"what, no apology?" he snaps, glaring down at you. it felt like it was piercing a hole into you with how intimidating it felt.
"sorry," you mutter, trying to sidestep him, but he moves to block your way.
"sorry doesn’t clean my shoes," he says, lifting one foot to inspect the damage. his tone is sharp, but there’s something about the way his lips quirk up that makes it clear he’s enjoying this.
but you’re not in the mood to deal with his shit right now, "maybe if you weren’t standing in the middle of the hallway like you own the place, this wouldn’t have happened," you snap back, your irritation getting the better of you.
his smirk widens, and he tilts his head, clearly amused. "oh, so you do have a spine. didn’t think you’d bite back."
the comment makes your blood boil, but you force yourself to stay calm. "are you done? i’m late for class."
he steps aside with a mock bow, sweeping his arm dramatically. "by all means, don’t let me stop you. but maybe try walking without causing a disaster next time." he says, the last few words more teasing than the others
you glare at him, giving him a side-eye and refusing to let him get the last word. "maybe next time, you can stop being a walking inconvenience."
you don’t wait for his response, pushing past him and disappearing into the crowd. even as you walk away, you can feel his eyes on you, that smug smirk of his practically burned into your memory.
later that morning, you’re venting to jaehyun and karina at lunch.
"he’s such an ass," you complain, stabbing your fork into your salad. "he acted like i spilled coffee on him on purpose."
karina raises an eyebrow, sipping her iced tea. "ni-ki? yeah, he’s like that. he likes messing with people, especially if they react."
"and you definitely reacted," jaehyun adds with a laugh. "i mean, come on, you basically called him a walking inconvenience."
"because he is," you argue. "i swear, i don’t know how anyone puts up with him."
karina shrugs. "jake, jay, and heeseung seem to like him well enough. maybe he’s different around his friends."
you roll your eyes. "or maybe they’re just as bad as he is."
jaehyun chuckles, but karina gives you a knowing look. "just be careful. he’s the type to hold grudges, and i’ve seen him turn teasing into a full-blown hobby."
"great," you mutter, already regretting your choice to snap at him.
it’s the next day, and you’ve successfully avoided ni-ki all morning. you’re starting to think you’ve dodged a bullet… until english class rolls around.
you’re barely settled in your seat when the teacher announces a new group project. the groans from your classmates echo through the room as she begins listing the pairs.
"let’s see... y/n, you’ll be with nishimura riki."
you freeze, your eyes widening in disbelief. you whip your head around just in time to see ni-ki’s face light up with a smug grin.
“you’ve got to be fucking kidding with me,” you mutter quietly to yourself
"looks like we’re partners," he says, sliding into the seat next to you.
"this has to be a joke," you mutter under your breath.
"nope, pretty sure it’s fate," he says, leaning back in his chair. "guess you’ll have to get used to me."
you shoot him a glare. "you’re insufferable."
"and you’re stuck with me," he says, unbothered.
later that afternoon, you’re sitting in the library, waiting for ni-ki to show up for your first project meeting. you’re determined to keep things professional—finish the project and avoid him as much as possible.
but of course, he shows up fifteen minutes late, strolling in like he owns the place.
"you’re late," you say, not bothering to hide your annoyance.
"fashionably late," he corrects, dropping into the seat across from you. "besides, you’re so eager. it’s kind of cute."
you ignore the comment, pulling out your notes. "let’s just get this over with."
he raises an eyebrow, leaning forward. "wow, you’re really fun to work with, huh?" he says sarcastically.
"if you actually helped instead of wasting time, maybe i would be," you snap.
he laughs, shaking his head. "relax. i’ll help. what do you need me to do?"
you narrow your eyes at him, suspicious of his sudden cooperation. but you hand him a set of notes anyway, deciding to give him the benefit of the doubt… for now.
as you work, you can’t help but notice the occasional glances he throws your way, the way his smirk softens when he thinks you’re not looking. it’s almost enough to make you question your first impression of him.
keyword: almost.
you tell yourself you can survive this project. a few study sessions, a presentation, and then you’ll never have to deal with nishimura riki again. but as the days pass, you realize it’s not going to be that simple.
the second study session doesn’t start off any better than the first. you’re sitting at the same library table, waiting for ni-ki, who, predictably, is late again. you’ve just started debating whether or not to text him when he finally strolls in, looking completely unbothered.
"you really need to work on your time management," you say as he drops into the chair across from you.
"and you need to work on your patience," he fires back, flashing that infuriating grin.
you groan, pulling out the project materials. "can we just get this done? the sooner we finish, the sooner i can stop seeing your face."
he pretends to clutch his chest. "ouch. and here i thought we were bonding."
"bonding?" you repeat, raising an eyebrow. "you’ve done nothing but annoy me since day one."
"exactly," he says, leaning back in his chair. "it’s called building rapport."
you roll your eyes, choosing to ignore him and focus on the task at hand.
despite the rocky start, you manage to get some work done. to your surprise, ni-ki actually contributes… when he’s not cracking jokes or making sarcastic comments, anyway.
"so, about this section," he says, gesturing to the notes in front of you. "do you think we should focus more on the analysis or the context?"
you blink, caught off guard by the seriousness in his tone. for a moment, he actually seems... focused.
"uh, the analysis, probably," you say, regaining your composure. "it ties everything together better."
he nods, scribbling something down in his notebook.
you study him for a moment, curious despite yourself. "you actually care about this?"
he looks up, smirking. "what, surprised i have a brain?"
"a little," you admit, earning a laugh from him.
"guess i’ll just have to keep impressing you," he says, and while his tone is teasing, there’s something in his expression that feels almost genuine.
the cracks in his facade start showing during the third study session. it’s late, and the library is quiet except for the soft rustling of papers and the occasional sigh from ni-ki.
"you’re awfully quiet," you say, glancing at him. "what’s wrong? run out of sarcastic comments?"
he snorts, but his usual grin doesn’t reach his eyes. "just tired, i guess."
you hesitate, not used to this version of him. "long day?"
he shrugs, tapping his pen against the table. "something like that."
the mood shifts, and for a brief moment, you see past the cocky exterior. the ni-ki who’s not always so sure of himself, who might actually have a soft side buried somewhere deep.
but just as quickly as it appeared, it’s gone. he flashes you a smirk and says, "don’t worry, though. i’m still smarter than you."
"and just like that, you ruined it," you say, rolling your eyes.
he laughs, the tension broken, but the moment lingers in the back of your mind.
the night before the project is due, you and ni-ki are sitting in the living room of your dorm, putting the final touches on your presentation. your friends are busy, leaving just the two of you to finish everything.
"we actually make a decent team," ni-ki says, leaning back on the couch.
you glance at him, surprised. "that’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me."
"don’t get used to it," he says with a grin, but there’s a softness to his tone that makes you pause.
"why do you do that?" you ask suddenly, the question slipping out before you can stop yourself.
"do what?"
"act like... this," you say, gesturing vaguely. "like you don’t care about anything."
he blinks, clearly caught off guard. "what makes you think i don’t care?"
"because you never take anything seriously," you say. "you’re always joking or teasing people, like it’s all just a game to you."
he’s quiet for a moment, his usual smirk replaced by something more thoughtful. "maybe it’s easier that way," he says finally.
"easier than what?"
he shrugs, avoiding your gaze. "easier than letting people see the parts of you they can use against you."
his words hit you harder than you expect. you’d never considered that there might be a reason behind his behavior. that his teasing and sarcasm might be a shield instead of just his personality.
"that sounds lonely," you say softly.
he looks at you then, his eyes meeting yours in a way that feels too intense, too vulnerable. "maybe it is."
the silence stretches between you, heavy with unspoken words. for the first time, you see ni-ki not as the cocky, infuriating guy who spilled coffee on his shoes, but as someone who’s more complex than he lets on.
"you don’t have to do that with me," you say quietly, the words surprising even yourself.
he stares at you for a moment, his expression unreadable. then he smiles. small and genuine, without a hint of sarcasm. "thanks," he says, and you can tell he means it.
the next day, the two of you present your project in class. it goes off without a hitch, and for once, ni-ki actually seems serious and focused.
"we did pretty good," he says afterward as you’re packing up your things.
"we did," you agree, and for the first time, you smile at him without any sarcasm or annoyance.
he grins back, but there’s something different in the way he looks at you now—something warmer, softer.
"guess i’ll see you around," he says, slinging his bag over his shoulder.
"yeah," you say, watching as he walks away.
you’re not sure what’s changed between you, but you know one thing for certain: this is only the beginning.
the weekend has finally arrived, and after a long week of school, you’re more than ready for some peace and quiet. your dorm room is a sanctuary of calm, with soft lighting, cozy blankets, and a pile of books waiting to be read. jaehyun and karina are out with their own plans, leaving you alone to unwind.
you’ve just made yourself a cup of tea and are settling in with a book when you hear a soft knock on your door.
"coming!" you call, setting your tea down and pushing yourself up from the couch. you open the door, expecting to find one of your friends—or maybe a neighbor—but instead, you’re met with a familiar face.
ni-ki stands in the doorway, looking far too pleased with himself.
"ni-ki?" you say, blinking in surprise. "what are you doing here?"
"well, i was just walking by," he says casually, although you can tell by the way his eyes sparkle that he has an ulterior motive. "and i thought, hey, maybe i could hang out."
you stare at him for a moment, unsure whether to laugh or roll your eyes. "how did you even know where i live?"
"oh, that was easy," he says, grinning. "i just asked karina for your address."
you can’t help but stare at him. "you bribed karina for my address?"
"not bribed," he says, feigning innocence. "i just asked really nicely."
"she gave it to you?" you ask, incredulous.
"yeah," he shrugs. "she said it was no big deal. something about ‘you two are friends now,’ i don’t know."
you lean against the doorframe, still processing. she probably just decided to give it to annoy you, "and you thought i’d just let you in?"
"well, yeah," he says, flashing you that signature cocky smile. "why not? i’m charming."
"you’re insufferable," you mutter, but you step aside anyway, gesturing for him to come in.
"thanks," he says, stepping into your room and looking around as if he owns the place. "this is nice. much cozier than i expected."
you can’t help but chuckle. "yeah, well, i like it simple."
"simple, huh?" he says, raising an eyebrow. "i thought you’d have some crazy expensive decor or something."
"i’m not exactly the ‘luxury’ type," you reply dryly.
"good to know," he says, sitting on your couch without asking. "so, what are we doing today?"
you blink, caught off guard by the question. "what do you mean ‘what are we doing’? i was planning on having a relaxing day. just me, my book, and my tea."
"boring," he says, groaning as he flops back into the cushions. "you need to live a little."
"i’m living just fine," you reply, rolling your eyes. "now get off my couch."
"come on, just for a little while," he says, grinning up at you. "let me hang out. i swear i’ll be quiet."
you stare at him, considering for a moment. "you’re not exactly known for being quiet."
he shrugs, looking unbothered. "fine, i’ll be your idea of ‘peaceful.’"
you sigh, sitting back down on the other side of the couch. despite yourself, you can’t help but feel a little amused. ni-ki’s presence is annoying, sure, but there’s something oddly comfortable about it too.
it’s around late afternoon when you start to hear the telltale sound of your phone buzzing on the coffee table. you reach over and glance at the screen, seeing a text from jaehyun.
jaehyun: "hey, you up for dinner tonight? karina and i were thinking of grabbing some food."
you frown, glancing over at ni-ki. "i already had plans with jaehyun and karina," you explain. "we were going to grab dinner."
ni-ki raises an eyebrow, his usual grin appears. "let me go with you"
you stare at ni-ki in disbelief. he stands there with that cocky grin of his, arms crossed, as if he’s just asked the most casual thing in the world.
"invite you to dinner with jaehyun and karina?" you repeat slowly, as though you can’t quite process what he’s saying.
"yeah, why not?" he shrugs nonchalantly, a playful glint in his eyes. "i’m not doing anything anyway, and it’d be more fun with me there."
you raise an eyebrow, considering the idea. "you want to crash our dinner plans? you’re really bold, you know that?"
"hey, it’s not crashing if you invite me," he says with a smirk, stepping closer. "besides, i’m fun. i’ll make it interesting."
you glance at your phone, seeing jaehyun’s text still sitting there. ‘are you coming or what?’
you look back at ni-ki. "i don’t know..."
"come on," he insists, giving you a look that makes you feel like you’re being peer-pressured in the most annoying but strangely convincing way possible. "it’ll be fun. jaehyun and karina will love me."
you frown. "do you even know how to act in front of my friends? they don’t exactly have the best impressions of you” you admit.
"how hard can it be?" he grins. "besides, it’s jaehyun and karina. they’ll get me. and if they don’t, i’ll just charm them."
you’re about to protest, but then you realize he’s not going to back down. and, for whatever reason, the thought of spending time with ni-ki, jaehyun, and karina all together suddenly seems oddly appealing.
you sigh, giving in. "fine, but don’t make it weird."
ni-ki beams. "deal. i’m going to be the perfect guest."
when you arrive at the restaurant with ni-ki in tow, jaehyun and karina are already waiting by the entrance. the look on jaehyun’s face when he spots you, and then ni-ki, could only be described as a mix of surprise and mild confusion.
"uh, what’s going on here?" jaehyun asks, blinking rapidly as he looks between you and ni-ki.
"what, you didn’t think i could bring my new ‘friend’ along?" you ask, feigning innocence. "he’s harmless."
"new friend?" karina raises an eyebrow. "that’s ni-ki, right?"
"yep, that’s the one," you say, nudging ni-ki with your elbow. "don’t let the attitude fool you, he’s alright."
ni-ki smirks and waves at them nonchalantly. "hey, guys. don’t mind me. just here to steal your food."
"you’re going to steal our food?" jaehyun asks, laughing as he steps forward to greet you both. "i should’ve known. ni-ki’s always up to something."
"i’m really not," ni-ki says, shrugging casually. "but i might steal your fries if you’re not careful."
karina eyes him with mild amusement. "alright, let’s just sit down before you scare us off."
the four of you sit down, with ni-ki taking the seat next to you, of course. jaehyun and karina sit across from you both, watching the dynamic between you and ni-ki with growing curiosity.
"so," karina starts after a few moments of awkward silence, "what exactly made you invite ni-ki to dinner?"
you glance at ni-ki, who looks entirely too pleased with himself. "he insisted," you say dryly. "he wouldn’t let up about it."
jaehyun chuckles. "that sounds about right. ni-ki can be pretty persistent."
"persistent, huh?" ni-ki smirks, clearly enjoying the attention. "i like to think of it as… persuasive."
"persuasive?" karina repeats, raising an eyebrow. "are we talking about the same ni-ki here? the one who bullies everyone he meets?"
ni-ki looks over at her and grins. "bullying? me? i prefer to call it ‘challenging.’"
you can’t help but laugh at his confident response. "yeah, he definitely challenges everyone. whether they want to or not."
jaehyun laughs. "i think we’re going to get along just fine tonight."
as the dinner progresses, it’s clear that the initial tension has dissipated. ni-ki’s usual teasing doesn’t feel as sharp when he’s around jaehyun and karina. he’s surprisingly… well, charming, in his own way. he cracks jokes, makes sarcastic remarks, and even joins in on the conversation when karina and jaehyun talk about their plans for the upcoming break.
you find yourself watching him more than you intend to, surprised by how easily he fits into the dynamic. there’s no tension between him and your friends, just a playful back-and-forth that somehow feels natural.
"so," jaehyun says, after a long stretch of conversation, "ni-ki, what’s your deal? you don’t really seem like the type to hang out with this lot." he gestures toward you and karina, giving you both a teasing smile.
"hey," you protest, "we’re cool."
"oh, i know," ni-ki says, grinning at jaehyun. "i just like to make things interesting. gotta keep them on their toes."
karina laughs. "that much is obvious. i’m surprised you didn’t try to make everyone do push-ups or something."
"who says i didn’t?" ni-ki winks, clearly enjoying himself.
you roll your eyes. "i’m going to regret this, aren’t i?"
"probably," karina says with a knowing grin. "but i have to admit, i wasn’t expecting him to be so… entertaining."
the rest of the dinner passes by in a blur of laughter, playful banter, and way too much food. by the time the check arrives, you’re not sure whether you’ve just had a fun night with your friends, or a chaotic, slightly ridiculous one.
as you step outside the restaurant with jaehyun, karina, and ni-ki, you feel an unexpected sense of contentment. ni-ki might have started as your enemy, but somewhere along the way, he’s shifted into something else. and now, with him standing next to you, joking around with your friends, you’re not so sure what to make of it all.
"thanks for inviting me," ni-ki says, glancing at you as you all walk to the parking lot. "i had a good time."
you glance over at him and shrug. "you weren’t as unbearable as usual."
he grins, a genuine, soft smile tugging at his lips. "i’ll take that as a compliment."
"you should," you say with a smile of your own. "because it’s the nicest thing i’ll say to you all week."
he chuckles, the sound warm and easy. "fair enough. i’ll take what i can get."
as you make your way home, you can’t help but think that this unexpected dinner with ni-ki might be one of the most fun nights you’ve had in a while.
you’re sprawled out on karina’s bed, watching as she types furiously on her laptop. jaehyun is sitting cross-legged on the floor, flipping through his notes from last week’s lecture, though he’s clearly not paying attention. it’s one of those easy afternoons where nothing seems particularly urgent, except for the thoughts swirling in your head.
you’d been trying to ignore them all day, hoping they’d go away on their own. but every time you close your eyes or let your mind wander, ni-ki’s face pops up, that stupid grin of his haunting your thoughts.
"alright," jaehyun says, breaking the silence. "spill."
"spill what?" you ask, trying to sound casual.
"whatever’s going on with you," he says, gesturing vaguely at you. "you’ve been weirdly quiet today. it’s creeping me out."
karina glances up from her laptop, narrowing her eyes. "yeah, now that he mentions it… you’ve been off. something on your mind?"
you groan, sitting up and burying your face in your hands. "why do you guys have to be so observant?"
"because we’re your friends," karina says simply, closing her laptop. "now, out with it. what’s going on?"
you hesitate, chewing on your lip as you try to figure out how to phrase it. "it’s… it’s about ni-ki."
jaehyun lets out a low whistle. "oh, this should be good."
karina leans forward, her expression instantly intrigued. "what about him? did he do something?"
"no," you say quickly, shaking your head. "he didn’t do anything. it’s just… he’s been hanging around a lot lately, and… i don’t know."
"you don’t know?" jaehyun repeats, raising an eyebrow. "that’s not very convincing."
you groan again, flopping back onto the bed. "okay, fine. i think… i think i might have feelings for him."
karina gasps, clapping her hands together like she’s just uncovered the juiciest piece of gossip ever. "i knew it!"
"you knew nothing," you mutter, covering your face with a pillow.
"are you kidding me?" she says, yanking the pillow away. "it was so obvious! the way you look at him, the way he teases you… i’ve been waiting for this moment."
jaehyun nods, smirking. "yeah, i kind of saw it coming too. you two have this weird energy whenever you’re together."
"weird energy?" you repeat, sitting up. "what does that even mean?"
"it means," jaehyun says, "that you two act like you’re in a rom-com. all the banter, the teasing, the lingering looks. it’s textbook ‘we’re pretending to hate each other but actually we’re into each other’ vibes."
karina nods enthusiastically. "exactly! and ni-ki? oh, he’s so into you."
"he’s not into me," you say quickly, shaking your head.
"he absolutely is," karina insists. "the way he looks at you? please. he’s head over heels, even if he’s too proud to admit it."
you frown, playing with the hem of your sleeve. "i don’t know… what if you’re wrong? what if he’s just messing around, and i’m reading too much into it?"
"we’re not wrong," jaehyun says confidently. "trust us. if ni-ki didn’t like you, he wouldn’t be spending all his free time with you."
"he literally shows up at your dorm uninvited," karina adds. "that’s not just friendly behavior. that’s ‘i like you and don’t know how to say it’ behavior."
you let their words sink in, your heart racing as you try to make sense of your feelings. maybe they’re right. maybe ni-ki’s teasing and constant presence mean something more.
but the thought of confronting those feelings, of admitting them to yourself, let alone to ni-ki, feels terrifying.
"what if i just… ignore it?" you suggest weakly.
karina groans. "you’re impossible. just talk to him, okay? or better yet, wait for him to confess. he’s bound to crack eventually."
jaehyun smirks. "and when he does, we’re going to say ‘we told you so.’"
you roll your eyes but can’t help the small smile tugging at your lips.
it’s a typical afternoon after school, and you’re sitting on the low wall near the campus courtyard, scrolling through your phone as you wait for karina and jaehyun to finish up their club activities. the sun hangs lazily in the sky, and most students have already scattered to their dorms or headed home. the courtyard is unusually quiet, except for the faint rustle of leaves and the occasional distant laugh.
you’re about to text karina and ask how long she’ll be when you hear footsteps approaching. without even looking up, you know who it is.
"what are you still doing here?" ni-ki’s familiar voice cuts through the silence, his tone casual, almost bored.
you glance up to see him standing a few feet away, his bag slung over one shoulder and his hands stuffed into his pockets. his hair’s a little messy, probably from running his fingers through it all day, and there’s that usual smirk on his face, the one that makes you want to roll your eyes.
"waiting for karina and jaehyun," you reply, tucking your phone into your pocket. "what about you? i thought you left already."
he shrugs, stepping closer and dropping his bag onto the ground next to you. "thought i’d stick around and see what you were up to."
"oh, how generous of you," you say dryly, swinging your legs idly as you look at him. "and here i was thinking you had better things to do."
"believe it or not," he says, plopping down on the wall beside you, "you’re pretty entertaining."
you snort. "wow. i’m honored."
he grins, leaning back on his hands as he looks up at the sky. for a moment, neither of you says anything, the comfortable silence settling between you. it’s strange how natural it feels to be around ni-ki now, how his teasing doesn’t grate on you the way it used to.
"you’ve been hanging out with me a lot lately," you say, breaking the silence. "what’s up with that?"
"what, you don’t enjoy my company?" he quips, glancing at you out of the corner of his eye.
"not what i said," you reply, giving him a look. "i’m just curious."
he shrugs again, a nonchalant gesture that seems almost rehearsed. "maybe i just like spending time with you."
your heart skips a beat at his words, but you brush it off, chalking it up to his usual teasing. "you’re terrible at answering questions, you know that?"
"i know," he says, smirking. "but you still put up with me, so i must be doing something right."
you roll your eyes, but a small smile tugs at your lips. before you can retort, ni-ki speaks again, his voice softer this time.
"it’s because i like you."
the words slip out so casually, so easily, that it takes a second for you to register them. when you do, you freeze, your brain scrambling to process what he just said.
"what?" you ask, turning to look at him.
he blinks, like he didn’t even realize he said it out loud, and for the first time, you see a flicker of uncertainty in his expression. "uh…"
"did you just say you like me?" you press, your heart pounding.
he scratches the back of his neck, looking anywhere but at you. "maybe."
"maybe?" you repeat, staring at him in disbelief. "ni-ki, you just said you like me. like, like me like me."
he sighs, finally meeting your gaze. "okay, fine. yeah, i said it. i like you. happy now?"
you’re not sure how to respond. your mind is a whirlwind of emotions. shock, confusion, and, if you’re being honest with yourself, a little bit of excitement.
"you’re kidding," you say after a moment, your voice barely above a whisper.
"do i look like i’m kidding?" he says, raising an eyebrow. "look, i wasn’t planning to say anything, but it kind of just… slipped out. so there you go. now you know."
you stare at him, trying to gauge if he’s being serious. but the way he’s looking at you, half-defiant, half-nervous, makes it clear that he’s not joking.
"why didn’t you say anything before?" you ask, your voice softer now.
"because," he says, running a hand through his hair, "i didn’t want to make things weird. we have this… thing, you know? the teasing, the banter. i didn’t want to mess it up."
"but you like me," you say again, like you’re trying to make sense of the words.
"yeah," he says simply, leaning back on his hands again. "i do. and it’s fine if you don’t feel the same way. i just… figured you should know."
you’re quiet for a moment, your thoughts racing. you think about all the times ni-ki’s teased you, all the times he’s gone out of his way to spend time with you. maybe he’s been trying to tell you this all along, in his own roundabout way.
"you’re such an idiot," you finally say, shaking your head.
his eyes widen, and he sits up straight. "wait, what? why am i an idiot?"
"because," you say, a smile tugging at your lips, "you could’ve just told me instead of being all weird about it."
he frowns. "i wasn’t being weird."
"you’ve been weird," you insist, laughing softly.
"okay, fine," he admits, rubbing the back of his neck. "maybe i’ve been a little weird."
"just a little," you tease, your smile growing.
he looks at you then, his expression softer, more open than you’ve ever seen it. "so… what now?"
"well," you say, pretending to think, "i guess you’ll just have to deal with the fact that i like you too."
his eyes widen again, and for a moment, he looks genuinely surprised. "wait, you do?"
"yeah," you say, laughing at the look on his face. "what, did you think i was going to reject you?"
"maybe," he admits, his lips curving into a sheepish grin. "i mean, you’re kind of out of my league."
"don’t push it," you say, swatting at his arm.
he laughs, the sound light and carefree, and you can’t help but join in. for once, there’s no teasing, no pretense. just the two of you, being honest with each other.
in the distance, you hear a loud whistle, followed by familiar voices calling out.
"oh my god, did they just confess?"
you whip your head around to see jake, jay, and heeseung standing a few feet away, clearly having eavesdropped on the entire conversation.
"i told you it was going to happen today," jay says, nudging jake.
"this is better than a drama," jake adds, grinning from ear to ear.
ni-ki groans, burying his face in his hands. "can you guys not?"
"what? we’re just here to support you," heeseung says, giving him a thumbs-up.
you laugh, the sound bubbling out of you uncontrollably, and ni-ki glances at you, his own smile breaking through despite his embarrassment.
"i hate them," he mutters, but there’s no real malice in his voice.
"you love them," you say, nudging him playfully.
"yeah, yeah," he grumbles, but he’s still smiling.
and for the first time, everything feels exactly as it should be.
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choas232 · 3 months ago
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G/N Chatty reader x Steb 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞
Summary: In which you grapple with feelings you don’t yet understand by talking a certain enforcer’s ears off. Forced proximity makes everything worse, as it tends to.
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CWs: Profanity. Canon typical violence. Reader has some bias about Zaunites they probably need to work on. I wrote most of this at 10pm at night, so be warned.
No use of Y/N, neutral terms and they/them are used to refer the reader. Set in episode three, season 2.
Word count: 2.9
Part two
𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝
“God. I’m starving. And tired. I barely slept at allllll last night. Do you think the Grey’s keeping us awake? Our glorious leader Kiramman sure wants it to, dragging us along at this cracking speed. It’s been a whole week, too. I’m gonna drop dead, at this rate.” You lament. Your fellow enforcer does not comment from his place behind you, his footsteps echoing around the pipe.
Graffiti crowds the metal surface, amateur artworks, declarations of love, violence, and scripts you don’t recognise cramming themselves over one another, space sparse and sought after. It’s not Jinx’s work. Still, there’s a chill on your back you choose to attribute to the profanities.
The people of the underground sure know how to decorate, that’s for sure.
You two have been chosen to scout out a fairly low-danger area in search of a Zuanite’s sighting of Jinx. He did say it after a hefty heaping of Grey was funnelled into his lungs and a gun was held to his head, but Caitlyn is paranoid enough to bark at shadows, and you will oblige, if only to keep her happy.
It’s not like any of you are much better. Loris is quieter than ever, Maddie jumps at the smallest sounds and of your companion… you have no idea. You never have. Steb’s inner workings remain a mystery to you.
You turn. “Are we there yet? We should be there soon, right?” Steb nods distantly, more focused on the setting around you.
This part of the pipes is yet to be flooded with grey, so you can see him clearly without the obscuring mask.
His light teal skin, thin lips, nose, sharp, angular features. His neat uniform. His polished posture. He is distinctly and utterly out of place amongst the chaos that surrounds you. His eyes are so blue. So opalescent, shining like pearls in his eye sockets. Is that weird to notice? How much detail is it normal to notice about someone? You should probably stop looking.
His ribbed ears flick back, ever so slightly, eyes flicking to meet yours for a brief moment.
You look away. “Uh.” His eyes. His blue eyes. Blue. “God. I’m sooo hungry. Hah. I haven’t eaten since this morning. The rations are running out, and all the Zaunite stuff Vi is bringing in is uhm, questionable.”
You don’t look behind you again, your mouth moving quicker. Your breath is tight, probably because of the steady stream of words flowing from your mouth. You think. “I would kill for a good sandwich. Or two. I might have to resort to cannibalism—”
Hands enclose around your collar and yank you back with force.
Below you, a human sized-hole lined with rusted, broken metal grating, a slowly, ever spinning fan—
Your heart staggers in your chest like a drunkard. Images of your empaled, scraped, body twisted and pressed beyond recognition cram into your skull, rattle and scream.
“Fuck.” You mumble, quietly. Steb’s hand releases your collar. “C-close one. Thanks. Fish-sticks. How didn’t I see that?” You laugh. He doesn’t. It isn’t funny.
He brushes the shoulder pads of your uniform off, carefully but hastily looking you up and down. He keeps a respectable distance between you, but you can still see his adam’s apple bob as he swallows. You mimic him. Your mouth feels dry.
He fixes you with a look as his hands drop to his sides, and although his face usually retains some semblance of ambiguity on it, you know exactly what he’s thinking. Watch where you’re going.
“Sorry doc. I…” You trail off. You should stop talking. You probably talk so much around him because he makes you nervous. Why does he make you nervous? Your usual slamming of thoughts trickles dry. You have no idea.
Carefully, you two traverse over the great gaping hole in the pipework. How did you miss it? You don’t sure don’t miss how Steb watches you hawk-like though, and the following guilt is low and prickling in your gut. He goes first, and every small unprompted movement of yours has him stiffening, arm moving to steady you.
“Jeez. Don’t mother hen me, I’m all grown-up, I assure you.” You bat him away, landing with a clang! of the metal against your boots as you leap across the last segment. His frown is resounding.
A corner stretches before you, now. You let him go first with a swing of your arm just in case the metal of the pipe opens up to attempt to swallow you yet again. “All yours,” He obliges.
It’s an open space. Milky green light filters through the roofing, painting the graffiti stained flooring monochromatic and hazy. Two other pipes adjoin to the room, and a mural of Janna clad in white laced with metallic armour bounds over the walls. It looks exactly like what was described, which is worrying, because hey, Jinx!
The sniffling child is even more worrying, though. Looking up, she brushes away dark locks  from her face and bursts into prompt tears. “Please, m-my-my… my leg. it really hurts.” She wails.
Sure enough, one of her legs is crushed under a slab of tin, making itself known as the cause of the light filtering through the roof. “Please. Please.” Snot dribbles down onto her ragged shirt, her big brown eyes blown wide.
Steb is already gone before you can access the situation, bounding over.
Poor kid. You wince, tapping your fingers against your lips. Probably just playing with the ball you see perched nearby when shoddy craftmanship led to tragedy. Still… “Jeez. Think to consider a trap? No? Just me.” You mutter.
“Just you.” The voice from behind you amusedly whispers, and then you feel the cool rim of the gun pressed against your skull.
Fear makes a mockery out of you. Your thoughts accelerate, snapping at each others heels, but you cannot think. You aren’t really the brawlers of the team. He’s the field medic, for fuck’s sake, and while you can handle yourself in a fight this is more of a Vi job. You regret mocking her cuisine choices. This is probably some kind of sick karma. Sick? You feel sick. God, your stomach is writhing, your insides eating each other up.
Steb, still blinded by his tunnel vision, hauls the tin off of the girl. His ears flick down as he peers down at the clean space beneath, clean of blood and gore. Her leg, unblemished and by all means healthy looking, curls back into her body, and then she bursts outwards like a spring, down the nearest tunnel.
Too late, he looks back at you.
“I’m sure they require you topsiders to rattle a few braincells together to wear that fancy uniform. They don’t need allll of them, do they?” The man holding the gun to your head calls out to him. Flesh drips from his arms, lanky and lean, pressing against your neck as he holds you into him. You smell the shimmer on his breath before you see his blood lined eyes.
Steb jerks forwards. Bruisingly, the gun slams into your skull. “Move and their brains go BOOM! Hands in the air. Now.” He snarls, and Steb freezes in place, slowly raising his hands. You can see him breathing, hard, heaving breaths.
More people clamour their way out of vents, behind slabs of wood. You count at least four. Shit.
Shit.
This is bad.
“Woah! Talk about dramatics, huh?” You start, and almost in shock, the man holding you to himself grip loosens. From Steb’s place, you can see the wrinkle that lines his mouth when he gets stressed creep into existence. (That’s normal to remember. You should know when your coworkers get stressed. Part of the job, and all.) He slowly shakes his head. You mouth, trust me. He shakes his head harder. “Maybe we should talk this out? Civilly, tea and biscuits? …No?”
“It stopped being civil when you went for one of mine.”
Of course that guy you beat the shit out of gave you the location of an ambush. He was all too eager to speak, and when you go poking your hand down foxholes, it’s going to get bitten off. You feel both incredibly stupid and incredibly self-satisfied, you knew it, and you went here anyways.
“One of yours? I mean, we probably didn’t mean to? It was probably a mistake—” he shoves the gun down your throat. Spittle drips down the barrel. You taste dirt and gunpowder. You taste the blood leaking from your tongue.
You taste fear.
“Well? Your bag.” He gestures loosely to Steb.
Steb locks eyes with you as he gently tugs the straps off of his back, letting the hefty bag land to the floor with a thump. Carefully, he steps back, raising his hands in the air once again.
One of the hovering goons quickly snatches it, tugging it open. Medical supplies, bottles, all-the-like clatter the ground, but she continues shifting through hastily, eyes slowly narrowing. The last of our food supplies…, you mournfully think, quickly followed by Caitlyn is going to kill us, and she’s probably right to.
“You told us there would be hex tech, you fucking liar.” She drops the bag carelessly, starting towards the man holding you. “Well, do you think I’m some sort of prophet? You knew that it was an estimate.” He snaps back, grip on you loosening, the gun shifting out of your mouth to point towards the soft flesh of your cheek, spreading out your blood clouded spit as it does.
“I think you set us the hell up. You promised we’d split the money, but where’s the money now, huh? I gotta family to feed, hired work is dropping like flies with the chem barons at each other’s throats, which means I missed on any number of begging clients for this shit.”
You get an idea.
“Oh, for fuck’s sake.”
It’s a terrible idea.
Steb tears his gaze from the arguing pair to meet your eyes, perhaps on some precognition of the mistake you are about to make.
You wink, grab the gun pressed to your cheek and then you yank.
It comes as cleanly as expected, the man’s adrenaline rattled, drug loosened reflexes nothing for the shock you give him when you take the gun from his hands, and than run. Surprise gives you the upper hand, yells clouding your soundscape. You still manage to pick out Steb’s footsteps, clean and even behind you as you barrel down the nearest pipe.
You run harder than you’ve ever run, past graffiti, with only your breath, the calls behind you, your heartbeat and the echoes of his and your boots slamming against metal to guide you.
You turn the corner so hard you slam your side against it, feeling your already bruised cheek cry out in pain in time with your yelp, and you stumble. Steb catches your shirt and yanks you right back up, and then you’re in another wide-open space.
Your head swings around, fear hammering around your ribcage like a desperate songbird.
Steb grabs your shoulder, gesturing with his head. You follow his gaze. There’s a smaller pipe in the wall, covered by a draping of torn fabric, and you rush towards it before you have any time to think, the fabric draping over your hair, the surface cool under your fingers.
He follows, your pursuer yells barrelling into your ears as the curtain draws shut.
The space is tight, circular, not even big enough for you to stretch out an arm and not brush the opposite end. Your back is pressed flush against the concrete and plaster. Your legs cage Steb, as do his, looping over one each other, his knee bent at an angle that’s for sure going to hurt later. His arms clutch the walls of the tube, yours resting bent in your lap.
He leans down, and his fingers gently grasp that stupid beret of his and tug it down onto his lap, before he pulls his head back up, his head scraping the roof. He’s a least a head taller than Maddie, and although you’d like to think of yourself as average, you are now grateful for the height you lack.
“OVER HERE!” Did they see you? Is this it? What can you do, two against at least five or so. You mean, counting has never really been your strong suit under pressure, and who’s to tell? Are you going to die? Are you going to die, your legs pressed into his midriff?
The gold smattering across Steb’s undereyes and nose adjoins with the darker turquoise scales lining the cavities his eyeballs are strung into, carving out little gold, blue, orange stripes, like the ones on the fish you and your parents used to gawk at the aquariums had.
Are they going to cart out your body to your parents, after your fellow enforcers find you, crammed into a hole in the underground? What would you had died for?
His eyes are so blue.
He blinks, smooth, deep lapis overtaking the gleaming surface of his eyes before his eyelids do. He has a second eyelid. How did you never notice?
His lips, perpetually downturned as they are, his steady line his eyebrows carve themselves into, his perfect posture, even as you are cramped within the pipe, the smooth, angular frame of his cheekbones all of it make him look like one of those forever uninconvenienced paintings the councillors hang from their mansion walls. He looks calm. His stupid snooty resting face cannot fool you. You know he isn’t.
His lips are parted, the gap between his front teeth visible as he stares down the opening of the tunnel like a loyal family dog. His little giveaway.
Maybe his inner workings aren’t such a mystery, after all.
He makes you nervous. He makes you so nervous. He makes you into a wreck.
You think you might be in love with him.
—and your pursuers are rushing past you, all until you can’t hear their voices and you’re alive. You’re alive and you’ve never been so happy to tomorrow eat shitty Zaunite food and have Caitlyn yell at you for loosing supplies and talk and talk and talk until your throat is raw.
You don’t. Talk. You don’t talk.
He’s looking at you.
You feel like a fool.
You sit there, just looking at him too. His eyelids slip halfway, letting you count the short lashes that frame them. His expression relaxes, loosens, ever so slightly, his arms moving from the wall of the tunnel to his lap.
You could sit here with him for hours, death inches from you both, and you could be happy. You could be suspended in disbelief and plausible deniability; you could allow yourself to lie. Your heart is pounding from the adrenaline, of course. Your face is pink because of overexertion, and you kind of want to kiss him because you’ve never kissed anybody and you may as well as get it over with before you die, right?
He points to his face. You blink, and then he points to yours. You brush your finger cheeks against the flesh and feel the sting of injury, spittle and blood on your fingers. Right.
Right. He’s looking at you because you’re injured right?
Of course he is. (Disappoint is still food, and you swallow it.)
Gently, he reaches into his breast pocket, pulling out a handkerchief. Instead of sparring you and handing it to you, he merely carefully holds your head, one hand on your jaw and the other gently patting down the mess on your cheek. His head is tilted. You feel your heart slam up your throat, a throbbing, horrible pain that lets you part your lips to let the breath escape you before it can choke you.
The hand cradling your jaw moves a careful finger up to brush your lower lip.
Accident, of course. He’s not even looking at them, rather, the mess, taking his sweet time as he does, so very gentle.
You think he might be the danger, not the hell that is the pipework, nor the Grey, nor not the man with the gun
He pulls back, tucking the handkerchief back into the pocket and shallowly inclining his head towards the opening.
With a long look back at you, he crawls out of the hole first. You follow, dizzily. Ever the gentlemen, he offers you a hand as you push your way out of the hell that made you. You take it and feel incredibly guilty for doing so, stumbling to your feet.
He fastens his beret, usually a sign from you to inwardly (or outwardly) mock his silly hat, still watching you. You do not, in fact, mock him. You might be shaking, in fact, and that thought makes you hate yourself more than you could ever despise that ugly navy piece of fabric.
He frowns, and then he gestures to your mouth. You flinch without meaning too. “Huh?”
He mimes speaking, shallowly opening and then hastily closing his mouth
He's right to be concerned.
You haven’t spoken since you two trapped yourselves in the tunnel, after all.
𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝
Notes: Thank you for reading!! :)))) STUPID. IDIOTS IN LOVE. Him under the guise of medical assistance letting himself touch you... bro isn't slick whatsoever. If you have any ideas, be sure to drop them in my ask box, there is lack of fic on him holy hell. As a side note, we all need the comfort after season two part two holy cow…
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azulpitlane · 1 year ago
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just pr I ln4
pairing: lando norris x ricciardo!reader summary: after being caught hooking up with lando, you both decide it would be good for your images to fake date. too bad you hate each other. notes: been loving enemies to lovers rn🫣 masterlist
f1gossip
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230,421 likes
f1gossip New WAG alert? After a night of partying, Lando Norris was pictured kissing Y/n Ricciardo outside the club! Onlookers claim they then went home together after this👀 He was seen having a private dinner with another girl just a few days ago and rumored to have brought a different girl on his ski trip a few weeks ago.
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user lando is on a streak LOL
user this is so random?!? i was not expecting this duo but im here for it HAHA
user no cause she rarely attends races but when she does shes never seen with lando?😭
user omg he better not play my girl, I love y/n
user WHAT DOES DANIEL THINK OF THIS OMG
user I wanna read the family gc so bad...
user wait they would be so cute
user is he finally settling down omg
user I hope so, I lowkey see them together
user im here for it!! shes so much better than these other girls hes been seen with
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notification center
danny what. were. you. thinking. you're in so much trouble missy call me ASAP!!!
y/bff/n LANDO NORRIS?!?!? WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM BEING A PIECE OF SHIT??? girl we need to debrief last night
lando norris we need to talk
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Fucking fantastic.
Based on your notifications, you put two and two together and realized you were paparazzi'd with none other than the man you hated the most. You and Lando had a very complicated relationship to say the least. You had met when your brother, Daniel, joined McLaren and from the start he had given you the cold shoulder. You didn't know what you did wrong and tried to be kind to him, but after a while you stopped when he dismissed you like a child. You thought you would get along with him after Danny had told you about his interest in photography. You yourself were a photographer and decided to take the year traveling with your brother to capture some photos in F1, but you had figured the fame was getting to Lando especially after his breakup with his girlfriend. He was starting to bring different girls to the garage in every race and you would never see them again after.
You remember your last interaction with him in the McLaren garage in the final race of the '22 season was when the complicated part of your relationship began.
"What are you doing here, y/n? This is a place for serious professionals, not hobbyists."
"Lando, always the charmer. I'm here to photograph greatness."
"Greatness? You wouldn't know greatness if it lapped you on the track."
"Well, I'm pretty sure greatness doesn't come with an ego the size of your car."
"Watch your tone, y/n. This is a dangerous place, not a playground for kids."
"I can handle myself, Lando. Unlike some people, I don't need a helmet to protect my head."
Both your eyes were filled with hatred as they interlocked, each refusing to back down. As the race begins, y/n continues to snap photos, capturing Lando's intense focus and determination.
After the race, both Lando and Daniel were disappointed they were not able to get into the podium on their last race of the season. Your brother asked for some time alone so you approached Lando, camera in hand, knowing it would be the last time you were in the same garage as him.
"Tough race, Lando. I got some incredible shots, though."
"Don't patronize me, y/n."
"You know for what it's worth, I saw a different side of you on the track this season. It's like you're fighting not just against other drivers, but against something within yourself.
"What are you talking about?"
"I may be the younger sister of your teammate, but I'm not blind. There's more to you than the arrogant facade you put on."
After that conversation, you began seeing Lando less and less considering your brother was now racing in AlphaTauri and you were hardly at the paddock anymore. The few times you did see Lando, the tension had shifted into something different. But it was now winter break and you and Lando were both back in Monaco.
You had gone out last night and you did not believe your luck when you saw Lando in the same club with a smirk on his face. Determined to show you could rise above the tension, you decided to lose herself in the pulsating rhythm of the music. As you moved to the beat, you felt a tap on your shoulder. Turning around, you found yourself face-to-face with none other than Lando.
"Surprised to see me, princess?" He looked at you with a mocking smile knowing the nickname would rile you up.
"Surprised to see you alone at a club and not wrapped up with some girl? Yes, actually."
"Didn't take you for the jealous type, I like it."
Against your better judgment, you found herself drawn into banter with him. The tension between you turned into a strange kind of chemistry as you exchanged barbs, each remark escalating in intensity. A few drinks were exchanged and you slowly began to lose your guard around him and eventually ending up on his bed that night.
You groaned at the memory of last night's mistake and decided it was best to text Lando back before anyone else to get your story straight. He quickly replied saying he was on his way and you began to straighten yourself up.
"You know usually when I hook up with a girl I don't see her the next morning. Consider yourself lucky y/n."
"Still arrogant as ever, even when we're both fucked right now."
"Well you're a little more fucked than I am really."
"Just get in here Lando." You opened the door to let him in and quickly shut it afraid you would be pictured together again.
"I've got good news for you sweetheart. My team has made a plan to sort this mess out."
"Go on with it. What is it?"
"Jeez feisty in the mornings, heh? But congratulations, you are officially my girlfriend, we've been dating for a few weeks now and have kept it under wraps to figure out our feelings for each other privately."
"A fake relationship? That's your solution? No fucking way."
Lando sighed and rolled his head back in annoyance. He knew you were immediately going to shut this idea down but he had planned what he was going to say beforehand and knew what to say to convince you.
"You think I want to do this? My team needs me to do this, I haven't exactly looked like a saint these past few weeks and hooking up with my friend's sister behind his back isn't going to make me look any better."
"And what's that got to do with me?"
"Well in case you haven't noticed, this doesn't look good on your part either princess. There's some hateful people on the internet already slut shaming you and saying you betrayed your brother. If we tell people we were already dating prior to these pictures, it lessens the hate. Not only that, are you really going to tell Danny you had a meaningless one night stand with one of his friends?"
You knew he had a point. Danny wasn't going to be happy if he found out about the brewing tension between you and Lando.
"Please y/n, the internet already likes us together. This would be good for us."
"Lando Norris saying please? Wow, never thought I'd see the day." You genuinely were shocked at his desperateness for you to agree, you didn't think about how this affected him as much it did you.
"Yeah, yeah. It's only for a few months then we could go back to pretending we dont exist to each other."
"Okay fine, just for a few months. And I'm doing this for Danny, not for you." You quickly agreed not really thinking it would be that big of a deal. Just a few posts and appearances together and this would be over before you knew it.
"I knew you'd give in." Lando gave you one of his infamous smirks and planted a kiss in the corner of your mouth. "Now come on we need some pictures to make this convincing."
And so it begins.
landonorris
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landonorris secrets out
tagged yourusername
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user OMFG
user im actually so happy theyre so cute😭❤️
user WHAT WAS DANNYS REACTION
yourusername 🧡
danielricciardo on the next flight to monaco btw. maxverstappen1 yourusername ooouuu you're in troubleeee user LMFAO MAX user WAIT DID DANIEL NOT KNOW???
danielricciardo 🫠🫠
user AHAHAH he doesn't seem too happy user 💀
user am I tripping or is he holding y/ns camera🥹
user it looks like the one she always has on her I LOVE THEM ALREADY
user my new roman empire I won't shut up about them from now on
user wasn't lando just with other girls?
user he can have female friends!! its not impossible
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part two??
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demifiendrsa · 2 months ago
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youtube
The Outer Worlds 2: First Gameplay Trailer
The Outer Worlds 2 will launch for PlayStation 5, Xbox Series X|S, and PC (Steam, Microsoft Store) in 2025. It will also be available via Game Pass. The PlayStation 5 version is newly announced.
Latest details
The call to go beyond the stars is here once again, and it’s bigger, bolder, and more unpredictable than ever. We just revealed a first gameplay trailer for The Outer Worlds 2 during The Game Awards 2024, promising a fresh adventure in a brand-new colony next year. No really, we know we’re not supposed to promise things in marketing, but the setting is completely new, so this is all factual. Just don’t break the colony again. We’re looking at each of you who sent the Hope into the sun in the last game.
In true Obsidian Entertainment fashion, you carve your path through Arcadia, a colony teeming with factions, intrigue, and chaos. It’s also home of skip drive technology and where the fate of the entire colony – and the galaxy – rests. As a daring, undeniably good-looking, and questionably competent Earth Directorate agent, you’re tasked with uncovering the source of devastating rifts threatening the entire galaxy. Talk about stakes (not to be confused with raptidon steaks, those are very different)! The choice of how to deal with the rifts is up to you. “Your worlds, your way,” as we say at Obsidian.
Are the rifts the only thing threatening Arcadia? Of course not! That would be too easy. A factional war between the “benevolent rulers” known as the Protectorate, a rebellious scientific religious order, and a corporate mega power has the colony torn apart. Each is trying to close or control the rifts for their own good/monetarily profitable needs. Church, state, and capitalism! Who will win?! Well, that’s really up to you. This is your game. We’ve said the choices were yours the whole time. See that Obsidian motto above? Yeah, you get it.
We’ve said choice a few times already, but guess what? This is an RPG so it’s going to come up a few more times. When it comes to crafting your commander, it is full-on “RPG with RPG elements” time from ability points to skill checks in conversations, to even how flawed you want to be because, let’s admit it, no one is perfect. Except those who think they are. Look at you go. Being perfect.
How you build your commander and chart your way through the narrative is uniquely yours as you plunge into this player-driven story. Whether you’re a disciple of diplomacy, a smart strategist, a crusader of chaos, or defiantly different (so we can keep the alliterations), the choice – you guessed it—is yours. Oh, and with this being The Outer Worlds, yes, you can dumb!
While The Outer Worlds 2 is a single-player RPG, you won’t be alone! Not virtually anyway. Enlist a crew of companions to help you achieve your goals. Nothing says “middle management” more than sending people out to fight your fights for you, then having them judge everything you do with a visual reminder of how much they loved or hated it. Maybe you’ll help them fulfill their dreams or goals along the way. Clearly you care enough about the people working with you to see their dreams realized… right?
As excitement grows for the upcoming 2025 launch, now is the perfect time to revisit The Outer Worlds and relive the adventure that started it all. Whether you’re a seasoned spacer or are setting foot in Halcyon for the first time, there’s no better moment to prepare for the next chapter. The Outer Worlds is available for purchase on Xbox One, Xbox Series X|S, Steam, PlayStation 4, PlayStation 5, and Nintendo Switch. You also can jump in today if you’re a Game Pass member.
On top of that, the universe is expanding beyond the game! The Outer Worlds 2 will be featured in the upcoming Secret Level anthology series, streaming on Prime Video. Tune in on December 17 for a short story that takes place between The Outer Worlds and The Outer Worlds 2. While you may have thought that was a lot of shilling, the Secret Level episode is legitimately good, and if the Board were around, they’d tell you it was mandatory viewing.
Wishlist the game today on Xbox Series X|S, the Xbox app on Windows PC, and Steam, and stay tuned for more updates on The Outer Worlds 2—we can’t wait to share what’s next with you. The galaxy is yours to explore; the only question is, how will you shape it?
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willowsnook · 3 months ago
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Let me in
Hi! Love your idea for a prompt list. Can I order: A turkey swiss on wheat bread, maybe mike’s way if you feel like it’s fitting for the sandwich?
Joe burrow x bsf!reader
Please don’t leave
—-----------------------------------------
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Fall in Cincinnati was something that you loved. The trees changed colors, you could start leaving your windows open, and, of course, Bengals football. Now, you’d never claim that you were a die-hard fan, that was still reserved for your beloved Green Bay Packers, but after 5 years in the city, they were a solid 2nd favorite. Plus, being good friends with the starting quarterback meant you had to root for them. 
You met Joe at a charity event a year after you moved to Ohio. Working for a Cincinnati-specific lifestyle magazine, your recommendations and reviews had made you quite well known in the city. Your strategy was always finding small, hidden gem places, usually family-owned, to review and elevate. This fulfilled your need to make a difference and also get paid to eat food. 
While your job was so public and in the spotlight, you were pretty introverted, which surprised a lot of people. You didn’t necessarily enjoy being the center of attention, focusing more on making those around you shine. This meant that while you were appreciative of being recognized by the community, you hated going to big events; you’d much rather just be writing about them. 
So when the introverted star of Cincinnati joined you in the shadows of an event, the two of you hit it off. Knowing who you were, his PR team had noticed and pitched a content series involving Joe. You spent a whole day with him, going to places he recommended and giving instant reviews. Initially, you were worried about it being awkward because you didn’t know him well, but you both had a blast. Joe was easy to talk to, and he liked that you treated him like anyone else. 
After that, he’d invited you to hang out with his friends several times, and Ja’marr really liked you, insisting that you be added to the friend group. Since then, you’d spent the last couple of years being forced to go to every home Bengals game, but you could also easily force one of them to help you with some kind of content for work. A mutually beneficial friendship you thought. 
Midway through the week, you were back at your apartment, taking pictures of some cookies someone sent you to be considered for an upcoming article you were writing. You snapped the perfect picture just as your phone rang, and you looked over to see it was Joe calling. 
“What’s up?” You said, putting the phone on speaker. 
“I’m bored. Can I come hang?” He asked. 
“Yeah, I’m doing some work, but I’ll be done soon.”
“Okay, I’m on my way.” 
You were used to Joe calling you randomly to hang out, especially when the season was going poorly. One thing you learned in your years of friendship with him was that he didn’t like to be alone, mostly so he didn’t spiral thinking about everything. You were happy to be a friend he could lean on. 
15 minutes later, you heard your front door open and smiled as Joe wandered into the kitchen. He gave you a small squeeze from behind as you leaned over your laptop. 
“Are you doing anything with these?” He asked, and you looked over at the cookies. 
“No, I just got done. Have at it,” you replied, amused as he shoveled one into his mouth. 
“These are pretty good,” he said, swallowing. “But I’ve had better.”
“Hmm,” you thought. “What don’t you like about them?”
“Too grainy,” he said, and you agreed, unable to think of what you were feeling. 
“That’s a good point; I’m using that,” you said, typing it down in your notes. 
“Watch out, I’m going to steal your job,” he joked, and you smirked. 
“Does that mean I get yours?”
“You’d probably do a better job than me right now,” he said, and you frowned, shutting your laptop. 
“You are still a superstar, even when you lose,” you told him earnestly, getting a small smile from him. 
“I think I need you with a headset on to tell me that during the games,” he said, and you laughed. 
“Yeah yeah,” you replied, blushing. “Want to take a walk or something? I need to get out of the house.” 
“Yeah, let’s go.”
The two of you walked down the street and ventured towards the water, chatting about upcoming events and his family coming to visit. You started to get chilly and held your arms briefly before Joe noticed. He pulled his hoodie off with one hand and handed it to you, not even stopping what he was saying. You pulled it on, inhaled the lingering cologne, and sighed. 
“Will you come to dinner with us tomorrow night?” he asked, jolting you back to reality.
“With your parents?” you asked, and he nodded. “Would that not be a little weird?”
“Why would it be weird?” 
“I don't know. I just wouldn’t want them to think we were dating or anything,” you said, confused. Joe frowned at that, but you didn’t have time to analyze it. 
“Ja’marr is coming too,” he said. “You are both my best friends, so I’d like you to meet them.” 
“Okay, if it’s important to you,” you agreed, giving in. Dinner with Joe’s parents. Huh. Sometimes you really didn’t understand why he chose you as a best friend when many people were fighting over it. If only people knew how clingy Mr. Cool was. 
—---------------------------------------------------
Ja’Marr picked you up from your place the next night and the two of you headed to dinner. 
“You look nice,” he commented, and you smiled. You and Ja’Marr had a flirty relationship, but nothing had ever come of it. One time, when you were both very drunk in the offseason, you had made out but it didn’t last long with him backing out, saying that Joe was going to kill him. You had just assumed that Joe didn’t want anyone in the friend group dating in case it got messy, which was understandable. With Ja’marr, you were mostly just attracted to him vs. wanting something more. 
“I still feel weird about this whole thing,” you admitted to him and he gave you a lazy smirk. 
“Please, they’ll love you,” he assured you. 
“That’s not what I’m worried about; I’m amazing,” you said, causing him to laugh. “I just think it’s weird and intimate. Like if my parents were in town, yeah, maybe I wouldn’t mind them meeting you guys at the game or to celebrate in a group after. But I wouldn’t invite you for a small dinner.” 
Ja’Marr gave you a look you couldn’t decipher before laughing to himself. 
“I’ll try not to take offense to that,” he said and you rolled your eyes. 
The restaurant was a nicer one that you had been to before for work. Joe’s parents stood up as you approached the table and warmly greeted you. His mom pulled you into a tight hug, laughing about how excited she was to meet you finally. You shot Ja’Marr a look and found him trying not to laugh. You could tell Joe was embarrassed, which made the situation a little amusing. 
Sitting down beside him, he gave you an easy smile while handing you the drink menu. Joe’s dad jumped into conversation with Ja’Marr about the season while Robin asked you a ton of questions about your job and basically your whole life. You ended up loving his parents; they were the sweetest people. While you might have missed the way that Joe was looking at you the whole dinner, his parents definitely did not. 
“It was so good to meet you y/n,” Robin gushed. “I’m sure we’ll see much more of you in the future.” 
You smiled, confused, while Ja’Marr couldn’t hold back his laugh. Joe’s face turned bright red and his dad chuckled. 
—------------------------------------------------
If you had thought the season was going poorly before it was a million times worse now. It seemed like each week, your two friends were putting up superstar numbers but still losing. After watching them lose by just a point to the Ravens, you clicked the TV off and sighed. Reaching for your phone you texted him a white heart and watched him read it and not reply. He usually would, even after a loss, but this one was tough so you didn’t pay much mind to it. 
As the week went on, you started to feel Joe’s tension about the team bleed into your friendship. He wasn’t answering your calls and had replied to any text you had sent him with just one word. What had really pissed you off though, was that he was supposed to shoot a Thanksgiving promo with you about places that provided free food for those who needed it and he didn’t show. 
“I get that you’re having a tough time right now and while I can live with you being a bad friend I can’t live with you 1. making me look bad professionally and 2. disappointing people making a difference. So give me a call when you figure your shit out,” you ranted to his voicemail. 
You were supposed to fly out for the game this weekend but weren’t sure if you still should. Calling Ja’Marr, you complained about Joe being a dick and that you didn’t know what to do. He assured you that you should still come and that Joe was just hurting because of the season. The best thing you could do was be there for him, even in the shadows. 
The game started out horribly with it being 24-6 leading into halftime. But a different team came out in the third quarter, and you went crazy as the Bengals got ahead. But like the week before, no matter what Joe did, even throwing for over 350 yards, they still lost in the end. You lingered by the locker room after the game and smiled sadly as you saw Ja’Marr first. He wrapped you in a hug, and he was happy to have you there. Joe on the other hand, did not look happy to see you. 
“What are you doing here?” he said coldly, and both you and Ja’Marr flinched. His teammate gave him a weird look, but Joe was just staring at you blankly. 
“I’ve had these tickets since before the season, you know that,” you replied. 
“I didn’t want you to come,” he said and you tried to ignore the hurt you felt. “Did you not get the hint from me ignoring you all week?” 
“Oh, so is that why you stood up the charity?” You bit back. “So that I would ‘get the hint’?”
Joe didn’t say anything, clenching his jaw and Ja’Marr tried to step in. 
“I wanted her to come man,” he said and Joe snapped his head towards his friend. 
“Well just fuck her then and get over it,” he replied and your jaw dropped. Ja”Marr shoved him backward, yelling at him before security intervened. You recovered from your shock and turned around, abruptly leaving the stadium. You called an Uber to take you back to the hotel, and the massive traffic gave you a lot of time to process what had just happened. 
You could understand him being upset over the game, especially since it was so fresh in his mind. But it’s not like you went up to him; he came up to you. This man was supposed to be your best friend, and he basically just called you a whore to your face. This shit was ridiculous. 
30 minutes later, you were walking into the hotel. Ja’Marr had tried calling, but you declined. You called the airline you were flying with to see if there was any chance of flying out early, and you were lucky to snag a seat on the last flight out. You quickly packed up your stuff after changing into a comfier outfit and headed down to the lobby to check out and call a car. 
Turning to head out the door you stopped as you saw Joe walking in, his eyes trained on you. He looked miserable and he made his way towards you slowly. 
“Y/n..” he started, his eyes filling up with tears, but you stopped him from saying anything else. 
“I’m leaving,” you said emotionlessly. He tried to reach out to you, but you flinched back and pain flashed across his face. 
“I need to talk to you y/n,” he begged. “Please don’t leave.” 
“Why would I stay?” You asked softly. “Goodbye, Joe.” 
You left him standing there wondering why it felt like your own heart was breaking into two. 
—-----------------------------------------------
It had been two weeks since then, and you had successfully avoided Joe at all costs. He blew up your phone of course but you have yet to answer. Luckily he hadn’t tried coming to your apartment because he knew you well enough to know that it’d piss you off. 
You were on your way to hang out with Ja’Marr for a group movie night which he promised you that Joe would not be at. You don’t know why you even believed him; Joe’s car was parked in the front driveway and you almost reversed until you saw Ja’Marr waving his arms at you. Stepping out, you crossed your arms, waiting for him. 
“I knew you wouldn’t come if you knew he was here,” he started and you scoffed. 
“You were right.”
“I am miserable because he is y/n,” he pleaded. “I’m sorry but I will be selfish for a minute. He is being a dick at practice to everyone and isn’t throwing me good balls. He’s moody, won’t say a word to me, and won’t leave his house unless necessary. So please let him make it up to you. You two belong together.”
“He called me a whore Ja’Marr!” You exclaimed frustrated and gave you a sympathetic look. 
“I know he did, and that was terrible. I tried to fight him on your behalf,” he said, earning a small smile from you. “God I shouldn’t tell you this but he’s so in love with you it’s insane. He’s hurting and you’re hurting. Please just talk to him.”
“He’s not in love with me,” you said and he just rolled his eyes. 
“Believe what you want but get in there,” he said steering you towards the door. 
The good thing was that there were a few other people here from your friend group, so technically, you didn’t even have to talk to him. He was the first person you saw when you walked in so clearly, this was a coordinated effort between the two friends. 
Joe did look sad, and you wanted to be happy about it, but you couldn’t find it in yourself. He was dressed down in grey sweats and a black T-shirt, his hair looking like he had run his hands through it over and over. His eyes were puffy, and that made your heart clench. 
“Are we ready to start?” One of your other friends called from the living room and you started to walk towards the room but Joe gently grabbed you, pulling you closer to him and letting Ja’Marr pass. 
“Can we talk?” He mumbled quietly to you and you nodded, letting him pull you into the study. You stood with your arms crossed as you looked at him, waiting. 
“I’m sorry y/n. I’m so sorry,” he said, his voice cracking slightly. “I was hurting so bad and I took it out on you. The one person who has always been there for me.” 
“Sorry isn’t going to cut it Joe,” you said, frustrated. “It’s not like it was just the comment; it was the week leading up to it, missing the event. I can’t be there for you when you don’t let me in.”
You had imagined how this conversation would go multiple times over the past few weeks. You expected an apology and another apology, but you did not expect Joe Burrow to start sobbing in front of you. 
He sunk against the wall and had his head in his hands while he was crying. Your shock wore off, and you knelt down in front of him, moving in between his legs. He looked up and your heart broke at his tear-stained face. 
“What is going on, Joe?” You asked softly, wiping some of his tears with your thumb. 
“I just don’t know what to do,” he whispered. “Everything is going wrong, and I don’t feel like I’m in control. I do everything I can, and it’s still not enough.” 
“Oh Joey,” you murmured, pulling his head into your shoulders. He held on to you tightly as he cried and you ran your hand through his hair gently. 
“I’m sorry,” he rasped. “I’m sorry I hurt you; I hated myself the second I said it.” 
“I forgive you Joe,” you told him, looking into his teary eyes. 
“I don’t deserve you; I’m not good enough for you,” he said. “I want to be enough for you.”
You cupped his face gently, making him look at you. Your own eyes started to water at the vulnerability he was showing.
"Joe, you’ve always been enough for me," you whispered. "You don’t have to prove anything. Not to me, not to anyone. I’m here for you, not for what you do or don’t achieve."
His brows furrowed, and he shook his head slightly, his hands moving to hold yours. "You don’t understand, y/n. I don’t just want to be your best friend—I want to be everything to you. And I’ve been so afraid of ruining our relationship that I pushed you away instead."
Your breath caught in your throat. "Joe..."
"I love you," he said, his voice breaking, but his gaze held steady. "I’ve been in love with you for so long, and I didn’t know how to tell you. But pushing you away hurt worse than anything I’ve ever felt on the field. I can’t lose you."
For a moment, the weight of his words left you speechless. You searched his face, finding nothing but raw sincerity. Your heart ached, but in the best way, as if it were piecing itself together after being fractured.
"I love you too, Joe," you admitted to him and yourself, a soft smile breaking through the tears on your face. "But you have to let me in. No more shutting me out, no matter how hard things get. We figure it out together, okay?"
His hands tightened around yours, and he nodded, relief washing over his features. "Together. I promise."
You leaned forward, gently kissing his forehead before resting your own against it. The two of you walked out of the study and into the living room, where everyone else was already engrossed in the movie. Ja’Marr looked between the two of you and at your connected hands and gave you a wide smirk. Joe moved to the big armchair and pulled you down with him, and you snuggled into his lap. His arms wrapped around you, and you finally felt content. 
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sweetbans29 · 5 months ago
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Stress Ball - CC
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Pairing: Caitlin Clark x Reader
Summary: The little things you do for Caitlin when she is stressed during a game (based on THIS request)
Warnings: Stressed CC
Word Count: 1.6k
Sweetbans Masterlist
AN: What I would give to be able to do this for her.
The expectations that the world has on Caitlin are unrealistic. Still in her rookie year, people have higher expectations on her than they do veterans who have been playing 5+ years in the league. Now that is not to say Caitlin is not capable because she very much is but the last thing she needs is someone else adding on to the expectations she has on herself.
When you first met Caitlin it was always in passing, playing against each other in tournaments and things like that. It wasn't until you both got drafted to Indiana that you really started to get to know each other. The two of you immediately hit it off in training camp and it was right before the first preseason game when you asked her out. To say things moved fast was an understatement.
It's now 4 months into the season and it has felt like you have been together for years. Being with Caitlin came so easy it was almost scary. Yet every time it felt like it should have gone up in flames, it didn't. The two of you would figure it out together and grow. You complemented each other well.
That leads you to right now. The Fever are playing the Lynx for the last time this season and everything is going wrong for the rookie star. At the end of the first quarter she has no points, 1 rebound and 1 assist. That is including the 2 personal fouls and 2 turnovers.
Everyone breaks from the first quarter huddle and Caitlin doesn't stand up. She just sits there her Gatorade towel bitten between her teeth. She loves those things more than she loves you (not actually but you tease her about it all the time). You can tell she is stuck in her mind which is exactly where she shouldn't be in a time like this. Down 10 after the first, the team needs her to not be stressed but locked in.
You grab your towel and place it around her shoulder. Usually you would pull at her towel and annoy her but seeing her state you decide against it.
Caitlin doesn't look up at you and continues to chew on her towel. You place your hand on her head, moving it to the side of it to sooth other her hair when she leans her head into your hand.
Nothing is said, nothing needs to be said. You know where she is at and she knows you know what she is at.
The buzzard rings and Caitlin finally stands. You remove the towel you put around her shoulders and she puts down her towel as the two of you walk back out to the floor.
The second quarter goes a little better. Caitlin gets on the board with a quick 4 points and it seems like there is momentum building. That is until things get heated between Temi and Alana.
You know Caitlin hates when she is starting to build momentum and something stops it. With a little confrontation on the floor, Caitlin becomes visibly frustrated and she throws her hands up in the air. walking in the other direction. You first help Aliyah grab Temi as the teams are told to go to their respective benches while the refs watch the replay.
Cait is standing on the floor with her hands on her hips, completely unamused. You walk over to her and push her to the bench. While walking behind her, your hands massage her shoulders before coming down to pinch her waist.
"Don't worry, your rhythm will be there when we get back on," you say softly to her. She nods once.
You never want to overstep when it comes to comforting Caitlin on the court. And you would say you do a pretty good job of making sure that you don't but today seems like one of those days where you just can't do enough.
At the half, Caitlin has been doing better but you can tell by her mannerisms that she is not playing near to the standard she is holding herself to.
As everyone is walking back out to the court to stay warm, you grab Caitlin's arm before heading out of the tunnel.
"Hey," you say but she won't make eye contact with you. "Look at me."
When she doesn't, you know she is internally fighting with you and she doesn't want to give in.
You grab her face and force her to look at you. You want to say something, give her encouraging words but know that would only piss her off so you settle with kissing her on the nose.
The action earns you a little smile from her and you let go of her. She begins walking back out and you give her a little slap on the butt.
"Hey!" She squeals causing you to laugh and run out in front of her onto the court.
The third quarter is better. You can see she is playing more like herself. She has made the decision to out the team on her back and carry everyone to the finish line. Everything was going much better until she is fouled and the refs don't make the call.
Her arms come up in a 'how did you not see that' motion and you are quick to grab her arm. The ball goes back the opposing way and Phee draws the foul on Lyss. Everyone is just standing around while the refs discuss something and you notice Caitlin getting frustrated with her hair. You look over at her redoing it for the second time in a row as she lets out a annoyed puff.
You walk over to your girl and pull her hair out of her last attempt. She is about to protest but you are forcing her to bend over so you can collect all of her hair. She giggles, surprising you as you allow her to flip back up.
Now standing begin her as you sooth out the bumps and tie the hair tie around it.
"What is so funny?" You ask as you finish and she turns around smiling. The refs finally walk back over and give Phee her first free throw shot.
"I drooled," Caitlin says as you both look down at the court where sure enough, there was a little pile of Caitlin's spit.
"Ewww gross," you say teasing her and she pushes you playfully. She uses her shoes to clear out it out and you help her. When one of the court-side workers see the two of you trying to clear something up, they run over and wipe it with a towel.
"Careful there, she might be contagious," you tease as the guy looks at you confused. Caitlin just rolls her eyes and pushes you again.
You finish helping her with her hair but bringing her little headband back up to keep the little fly-aways out of her face.
"All better," you say and she looks at you with a little smile.
"Thank you," she says.
"Now let's win this game," you say and push her back to the back court to get the inbound pass.
The game comes down to the wire as the Fever somehow manage to pull out the win. Caitlin and Aliyah head to the pressor after while you and the rest of the team get to head back to the locker.
They are almost through the pressor when someone asks about the interactions between you and Caitlin.
"Caitlin, how do you manage stress when you are on the floor? It seems like you weren't playing like your usual self starting the game off but then came back and dominated the second half." The reported says.
Aliyah looks over at Caitlin with a knowing look.
"Ya, how do you manage your stress on the floor?" Aliyah says egging Caitlin on.
"Well, I have great teammates that know how to lift me up. The success of the team doesn't rely on one person. The win didn't come with me in the second half - ya sure, I helped and contributed but it first started off with Aliyah in the first half. She kept us in the game until I was able to heat up a little." Caitlin says, not specifically mentioning you. Regardless of if she mentions you or not, she knows there are going to be a disgusting amount of edits by tomorrow morning of the two of you, not that she ever minds.
As Aliyah and Caitlin are walking back, Aliyah bumps Caitlin.
"I am so telling your girl you just called her your teammate," Aliyah says.
"She is, she is our teammate," Caitlin says.
"Ya but you and the whole world knows she is is the sole reason you were able to get out of your head and back in this game and you just called her a teammate," Aliyah says.
"It isn't a big deal," Caitlin says.
"Fine, then I am going to go and tell her exactly what you said," Aliyah say as she picks up her pace to run and tell you that Caitlin only called you her teammate and not her girlfriend.
"No, wait!" Caitlin calls after Aliyah as she picks up her pace to stop her from tattling.
AN: Short and sweet! Let me know what you think! And as always, thank you for the love and support
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theemporium · 3 months ago
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[3.6k] sometimes home is a place. sometimes it's a person. sometimes it's a bench that holds more memories than mat can fully handle, memories that are slipping through his fingers.
based on 'coney island' by taylor swift for the eras tour hockey fic challenge created by @comphy-and-cozy and @wyattjohnston!!
.
Present – November 2024 
Never in his life had Mat Barzal felt as pathetic as he did sitting on that bench in Coney Island.
It was cold as fuck, for one, which should have been expected on a day in late November in New York. The temperature was likely below freezing, the chill was starting to seep into his bones, and the jacket he had haphazardly thrown on was doing little to battle the weather.
Yet, it was barely a blip on his radar as the last few weeks properly washed over him. 
Despite the holiday season, there were (thankfully) not many people around to see Mat in all his pathetic and embarrassing glory. Most people were probably sane inside their warm homes, enjoying dinner with the people they cherish the most. It felt stupid to be envious of a city full of people but that is exactly what he was.
Because as Mat sat on that bench, staring out at the near empty beach, he felt like he was choking. 
On his feelings. On his memories. On his bitter resentment that, once upon a time, he was like those people.
That Mat used to have a warm home where he ate dinner with someone he fucking loved and cherished more than anyone or anything else in the world, but now he had lost that person. 
That he didn’t know where his person was or what they were doing, but they were doing much better than him as he sat on the same fucking bench where he first met them.
Where he first met you. 
August 2021
“You insist on this every year!” 
“Because it’s fun every year!” 
“And yet you still get pissy when you get beaten by a carnival game.”
Mat glared at him from over his shoulder, not faltering in his steps as he shot his cackling friend a look. “It doesn’t beat me—”
Beau snorted, giving the boy a fond shove as he pushed his way through the crowd to catch up until they were shoulder-to-shoulder again. “Dude, it’s a stupid game that you try every single time. And you fail every time.” 
“It’s rigged,” Mat huffed.
“Yeah, that’s the whole fucking point,” Beau deadpanned. “They are all rigged.”
“But I’ve beaten them all,” Mat whined, sounding young and bratty. “The ring toss is rigged more. It’s made to torture one’s mind—”
“Your mind.”
“—until they are driven insane and haunted by those stupid rings,” he continued to grumble, muttering an apology after he almost walked straight into a lady pushing a stroller.
“All for an arcade ring,” Beau mused, shaking his head. “Dude, you need to let it go.” 
Mat turned to glare at the boy. “No. I have won every single one of these stupid games. I am gonna win this one too.”
Beau opened his mouth. “Mat, dude—”
“And I am gonna get that stupid ring and I will wear it every single day of my—” 
The noise that left his mouth cut him short, something between a scream and squeak of surprise as he found his body hitting someone else instead of the clear path down the pier like he had assumed. He managed to stay on his feet, considering he was a six foot hockey player whose job revolved around being slammed into by other six foot hockey players. 
His victim? Not so much.
“Fuck.” 
It came out like a wheezed, as though the person was winded. Mat quickly spun around, the apologies already leaving his lips as he offered his hand out before he even took a look at the person he accidentally knocked over. And when he did, the apologies died on his tongue as he stared at you, his expression stuck between awe and something else that Beau would spend the better part of the next few years teasing him for.
“Do you even watch where you are going?” 
“Yeah,” Mat replied dumbly, staring at you like he was lost in a daze.
“Clearly not,” you murmured but still took his hand, giving him an odd look when it took longer than a few seconds before he realised and helped you up.
“I’m Mat,” he blurted out before he even let go of your hand. “And I’m sorry.” 
Your lips twitched. “I accept your apology, Mat.” 
“And your name?” He asked, not even trying to be subtle about it (if Beau’s snort was anything to go by). 
Mat feld winded himself when you smiled as you told him your name. 
February 2022
“So, let me get this straight.” 
“I am tired of repeating myself.”
“You’re taking her out on Valentine’s Day—”
“Not for Valentine’s Day!”
“Yeah, sorry, my bad. You are taking your friend who you are desperately in love with out on Valentine's Day. How silly of me to take that the wrong way.” 
Mat rolled his eyes, even if Beau couldn’t currently see him. He tucked his free hand into his jacket pocket, the other one curled around his phone as his eyes continued to wander over the pink and red decorations dotted all over the place. It made his nose scrunch up.
“It was the only day we both had free,” Mat insisted, his cheeks tinting pink for a whole different reason other than the cold, nipping weather of winter in New York. 
“No denial about the ‘in love’ part.” 
“Shut up,” he gritted through clenched teeth, as if anyone else could hear Beau except him.
“It’s just a little pathetic—”
“I didn’t ask,” Mat deadpanned, trying to ignore how hot his face now felt. “I don’t even know why I called you.”
“Because you needed a pep talk to finally make a move.” 
“I’m hanging up now,” Mat grumbled, ignoring whatever protests he received on the other side as he quickly pressed the red button before shoving his phone into his pocket with a huff. He was so lost in muttering to himself under his breath that he hadn’t noticed you approaching.
“Woah,” you laughed, hands up in mock defence at the way he jumped out of his skin. “You good?” 
“Yeah, I just—” He waved it off, an easy and genuine smile on his lips as he took in the way you were bundled up, an Islanders scarf around your neck. “Ready to have your ass kicked?” 
Your lips twitched. “Ready to cry over the ring toss again?” 
He did not, in fact, cry over the ring toss but he was undoubtedly grumpy by the time the two of you settled down on one of the benches looking out towards the beach, huffing as he took an aggressive bite from the pretzel that definitely didn’t fit his diet plan.
“C’mon,” you laughed, nudging your shoulder against his. “It’s just a game.” 
“It’s a stupid game,” Mat retorted.
“Beau was right, you take it way too seriously,” you commented, playful and lighthearted with a gleam in your eyes. Like you were so unaware that the comfort you shared with his friends made his chest tighten in the best way possible.
“You have a little—” He cut himself off, gesturing to the side of your lip.
Your brows furrowed, your thumb attempting to swipe the brown sugar away just to miss completely. “Did I get it?” 
“No, I—here, let me,” Mat murmured, reaching over to gently swipe the brown sugar away. But his thumb lingered, his eyes locked on your lips before glancing up at you. He waited for you to pull away but you just stared back.
For a moment, Mat wondered if you were going to suddenly pull away and pretend the small moment never happened.
For a moment, Mat’s stomach dropped at the thought this would be as far as he got with you.
And then you were leaning forward, your lips pressed against his and the pretzels long forgotten.
His body reacted faster than his brain did, kissing you back as the sweet taste of cinnamon and sugar overwhelmed him. The pretzel was left on the bench between you, his hands cupping your face as he sunk into the kiss, as he sunk into your embrace.
And only when you pulled back to smile at him did his brain seem to realise what had just happened. 
And only then did he grin right back at you. 
May 2022 
“God, hockey is brutal.”
Mat paused, raising his brows. “Just realised that?”
“Sorry, I know you didn’t want to talk about hockey after—” You cut yourself off, wincing a little as you stood in his kitchen, just dressed in one of his shirts (ironically, an Islanders one with the number thirteen above your heart) with a mug of coffee in hand. “Ignore me. Watch the eggs don’t burn.” 
Mat snorted. “What has made you realise hockey is so brutal?” 
“Just kinda thinking about it,” you shrugged, your gaze on the rim of your mug rather than his face. It made him frown a little. “Like, I know it’s a part of the sport but, fuck, all it takes is one bad hit and—”
“Woah, hey,” Mat’s frown deepened as he reached for you, the stove turned off, the eggs forgotten and his hand reaching to place the coffee mug on the counter. He took your face in his hands, his thumbs smoothing over the apples of your cheeks. 
“Sorry,” you laughed, but it sounded a bit wet and weak to his ears. He tilted your head up, his lips pressed together when he noticed how glossy your eyes were. “I guess I just never realised how brutal the sport was until I met you. And you guys play through so many injuries and I know your season is over now but the idea of you pushing yourself even more is just—”
“Come back home with me.”
You blinked. “What?”
“Come back home with me for the summer,” Mat repeated, a soft smile on his lips. 
You blinked again, your confusion only growing. “Did you not just hear me—” 
“I did,” Mat interrupted, nodding his head with the look of adoration still written plainly across his face. “And all I could think was, ‘wow, how lucky am I to have this amazing girl care about me so much’ and I just…I am lucky. So lucky. And I wanna show other people how lucky I am. I want to show my family how lucky I am.”
Your face softened. “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” Mat murmured. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” you whispered before leaning in, a soft and lingering kiss left on his lips before you pulled back. “And I’m lucky you care about me too.” 
“I’m really glad I bumped into you that day in Coney Island,” Mat confessed, something warm and comforting bubbling in his stomach at the sight of your smile. 
“Yeah, me too,” you hummed, a glint of mischief in your eyes. “And I love you even if you can’t win the ring toss—”
Mat groaned, his head dropping to the crook of your neck. “Don’t ruin the moment.”
March 2023
“You don’t have to hide it from me.”
Mat blinked, his thoughts torn away from him as he turned to find you settling down onto the bench next to him, two pretzels in your hand. He murmured a small ‘thanks’ as he took one of the pretzels from you, staring at the sugary cinnamon sticks with little appetite. 
“Hide what?” Mat asked. 
“Mat,” you said his name in a way that made his chest tighten, so soft and gentle, like he was some scared animal you were slowly approaching. “Baby, I know you miss him. You don’t have to pretend.” 
His eyes dropped back to the pretzel in his hands. 
Because it was true. He did miss Beau. He missed Beau more than he cared to admit. And it was stupid because he knew this was how hockey worked, he had friends traded and sent away multiple times before. It was a part of the sport. 
But he just didn’t think it would ever hurt this bad, even weeks after the trade had happened. His focus should have been the season and the playoffs approaching. He should have been focused on the team. 
But every time he went on the ice, he couldn’t help but feel like a part of him was missing when he lifted his head and didn’t see Beau there, ready to accept his pass.
“There was this small part of me that just thought—” Mat paused, letting out a heavy sigh. “That we would be on the same team forever, you know? That it would always be me and him. That we would win the Cup together and…yeah.”
“I know,” you whispered, soft and soothing as you placed your head on his shoulder and let him lean his head against yours. “You never know. You two will find your way back to each other.”
His lips twitched into a sad smile. “Maybe.”
“You were always meant to find each other in this life,” you told him, sounding so sincere and genuine over the distant cheers and screams and buzzing noise of the amusement park behind you. “Just because you don’t live minutes away anymore, doesn’t mean that ends. He is always gonna be there for you, just like I am.”
Mat pressed a kiss to the top of your head. “Thank you.”
“Always, Mat. Always.” 
July 2023
“Home, sweet home!”
Mat winced a little as his voice echoed through the empty apartment, the walls bare and the place a little dusty. But it was yours and it made it perfect, it made the keys in his hand feel heavier and more special than his last set. 
“Fuck, we have so much to unpack,” you commented but you sounded happy. You both did, despite the state of exhaustion the last few days left you, attempting to pack up both of your apartments and moving into your new shared place. 
“That is a later problem,” Mat waved you off, reaching towards you so he could wind his arms around your waist and pull you closer. “We have a mattress and takeout menus, what else do we need?” 
“Preferably some sheets,” you teased, not even attempting to pull yourself out of his hold. You were content exactly where you were. “I’m, like, ninety percent sure you put them in the wrong box.”
“Blame the pretty one,” Mat huffed, cackling when you playfully pinched his hip. “Kidding, baby, you’re obviously the pretty one in the relationship.”
“We can both be pretty,” you rolled your eyes before laying your head on his chest, smiling when you felt him lean his chin on top. “Can’t wait to make this place ours.” 
“It’s gonna be so pretty so it can match us,” Mat murmured, grinning when you laughed in response. 
“It looks so plain right now, it’s freaky,” you commented, half-hearted with no real heaviness to your words. It would take a few days for you both to make it feel homely and you were looking forward to it. 
But Mat was already untangling himself from your hold, grinning as he began tugging you towards the kitchen. “We can put our first proper decoration up!” 
Your brows furrowed together in confusion. “What? But the boxes are—” 
You cut yourself off as you watched Mat reach into the pocket of his sweatpants, grinning widely as he pulled out a small magenet and slapped it on the middle of the very bland fridge. He looked at the magnet with great pride before turning to you, his smile only growing.
You let out a laugh at the sight of the Coney Island magnet on the fridge. “Perfect.”
“Our first home,” Mat grinned, pulling you back in so he could smack a kiss on your lips. “The first of many.”
“I’m not moving for at least another few years,” you joked, smiling against his lips. “This whole thing was exhausting.” 
“As long as it’s with you, I don’t really care.”
January 2024
“I need your help.” 
“Oh god, what have you done?” 
Mat frowned at his phone for a moment, forgetting about the bundling nerves that had left him on edge for the last week. He was sure you were starting to pick up on it, even if you hadn’t mentioned as much—thankfully. But after a week of waiting, he finally had the perfect opportunity to call his sister whilst you were out of the house. 
“I have done nothing. Yet.” 
His sister sighed. “Mathew—”
“No full names needed,” he murmured, his cheeks burning as he leaned back against the couch, staring at the ceiling with determination that was quickly dwindling the longer the call went on. “I just…I need your help.”
“With?” 
“A ring.” 
His frown deepened when Liana laughed. “If this is about that arcade game Beau told me about—”
“What? No,” he sighed, his blush only deepening. “I need help picking a ring. A real ring. An engagement ring.”
His sister was silent for a few moments before she spoke. “Holy shit. You’re really gonna do it?” 
Mat couldn’t even bite back his smile. “I want to. This summer, maybe. But I need a ring and I was thinking you could help while we’re up for All Stars and—” 
“Sold. Done. I’m not letting you pick an ugly ring for my future sister-in-law.”
“She might still say no,” Mat reminded her, even if his stomach twisted uncomfortably at the thought. 
“Of course she won’t,” Liana retorted, sounding so confident that Mat almost wanted to believe her wholeheartedly. “Especially if you let me help pick a ring.” 
Mat pressed his lips together. “I really want to find the perfect ring.” 
“We will. She is going to love it, Mat. She is going to say yes.” 
“Good,” he murmured, grinning. “Because she’s it for me. She’s the only person I wanna give a ring to.”
“You’re such a sap.”
“Shut up.”
October 2024
He couldn’t even remember what started the argument. 
If he was being honest, the tension had been brewing for a while. It had been a combination of things and none of them had made the atmosphere around the apartment much better. Small, silly things that shouldn’t have been that bad but felt like the end of the world as they were thrown at you both, one after the other.
Mat knew it was bad.
He just didn’t think it was this bad.
It felt like the two of you had been at it for hours, and maybe you had. He couldn’t tell anymore, he didn’t know if it had been minutes or hours the two of you had stood on opposite sides of the living room, yelling and screaming and crying. It all felt too much, like it was getting bigger and bigger, just waiting to pop. 
And then it fucking did. 
“I-I can’t do this anymore.” 
And Mat felt like a deflating balloon, the air escaping his lungs as he found himself staring at you, his mouth unable to voice any of the thoughts he wanted to say.
“Maybe,” you let out a bitter laugh, pained and hurt and weak. “Maybe we just aren’t forever, Mat. Maybe you’re not ready to let anything but hockey be your forever.” 
And you were wrong. 
Deep down, Mat knew you were wrong and his brain was screaming for him to tell you just how wrong you were. Because the fight had escalated and spun out of control and he should have grabbed the wheel with both hands to stabilise you both.
But he was hurt and he was petty and he felt his mouth saying the exact opposite of how he felt. 
“Maybe you’re right.” 
The way your whole body deflated and your face fell would haunt his nightmares for nights to come, along with the sound of the apartment door slamming shut as you left and never looked back. 
Present – November 2024 
Once upon a time, the biggest challenge Coney Island provided him was the damn ring toss game. It had been like that for years. 
But now, he sat on the bench, the plastic ring between his fingers feeling as heavy as the other ring in his pocket. He didn’t feel victorious, he didn’t feel anything but emptiness. Because neither ring meant anything when he was here alone, when he had failed to give you both.
The ring toss was barely a challenge compared to returning to this damn bench almost every day since he had pulled from the lineup with an injury that just felt like a mockery on top of everything else. 
But he did it. He came back every single day because it hurt and he deserved it. He deserved to sit there and think about just what he lost. Because he had no idea where you were, he hadn’t heard a single word from you—not even Beau would tell him if he had heard from you.
Mat had let pride and something else just as stupid get in the way of his forever.
The least he could do was bear the cold, winter weather on that stupid bench until his fingers were too damn numb to hold the stupid arcade ring. 
The least he could do was spend the rest of his days wondering if there was a universe where things were different, where he still had you, where he was able to see you one more time.
The least he could do was let his own thoughts about losing you forever haunt him. 
The least he could do was hope the universe would give him one more fucking chance to fix everything with you, to at least give you the stupid arcade ring he once promised he would win for you.
The least he could do was apologise for not making you his centrefold like he knew you deserved.
Mat stared down at the phone in his hand, pressing your contact before he could talk himself out of it. He had to try. For you, for him, for the forever he knew you two could have. 
He had to try. 
Ring. Ring. Ring.
“Hello?”
.
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