#peak comedy here guys

[kopykunoichi]

This scene lives rent free in my head

[jaegerisim]

PT. 2 of my HP x BYLER AU

The summer holidays passed by in a blur and between homework and hanging out with Will, Mike had been pretty busy.

Now, in "Platform 9 and 3/4" Mike buzzed with excitement to hug Will. Although they'd seen each other barely 48 hours ago, Mike couldn't help but feel like they'd been 48 days or years. So he moved around with his trolley until he spotted a familiar brown head sticking up in the multitude.

Mike pushed his trolley forward and grinned at Will, who still hadn't seen him as he was focused on something or someone else. That person was Max, who was babbling excitedly about all the new curses and charms Robin was going to teach her this year, while Will nodded along. Meanwhile, Will's mother fussed over how Will's hand-me-down shoes were already displaying holes and his tie was all crooked. Jonathan had his arms wrapped around Steve Harrington whose cheeks were a pretty red color.

Will turned to look at his brother, who stuck his tongue at him. Max grabbed Will's hand trying to draw his attention towards whatever it was she was saying. Will slapped her hand away playfully and she said something in mock offense.

Mrs. Byers was watching the whole interaction with an amused face. Finally, Mike reached his limit and marched over.

"Will!" Mike called "I missed you!"

"So, did I," Will laughed as Mike pulled him away from Max "but we saw each other 2 days ago! It's been weeks since I've seen Max!"

Mike frowned, they'd seen each other during the summer, without The Party? Worse of all, Will hadn't told Mike about this. It was outrageous, they'd promised to tell each other everything! This was all Max's fault.

Not only that, but the red-haired girl he got on Mike's nerves because she seemed to go wherever Will went, meaning he would no longer have Will to himself.

Once in the train, they bumped into El, Lucas and Dustin. Who invited Mike, Will and Max to sit with them. Much to Mike's dismay, Will sat next to the window and Max took the seat next to him.

So Mike sat between El and the door. El was acting weirder than she had last year, she was constantly red in the face and stuttered a lot. Mike almost thought she has a fever, but apparently that wasn't it. Anyways, seeing Max and Will share inside jokes and swap food provokes something really ugly inside of Mike, something burning and painful.

Since Mike was too focused on his own jealousy, he failed to notice Will's own frustration and longing stares while Mike seemingly "flirted" with El.

As the days passed Mike felt he and Will were growing distant from each other. Will hung out with Max and Robin more often while Mike felt like El was the only one who truly understood him.

"Mike!" cried Will, one cloudy, spring day, as he rushed into the courtyard where Mike sat "I tried out for the Quidditch team and they accepted me! I'm a Beater! Training starts tomorrow!"

Mike wanted to be happy for him, he truly did. Yet, he couldn't. He couldn't bring himself to genuinely be happy for his best friend. He couldn't fathom his sweet and caring Will playing such a dangerous sport.

"Will, be honest, do you even like Quidditch?" Mike asked, with a skeptical frown.

"Y- Yeah! I do. It's a great sport and Professor Creel says I'll be a great Beater!" Will sounded defensive.

"Professor Creel? You trust him? Will, he's not to be trusted!" insisted Mike

"I'm sorry?" snapped Will "He is not to be trusted? Why? 'Cause he's a Slytherin, right?"

Mike bit his lip, he hadn't meant to say that.

"Well, guess what? I'm Slytherin too! Does that mean you can't trust me either, huh?"

It began to rain and at one point Mike didn't know if the droplet he felt against his cheeks were tears or the rain itself.

"That's not what I meant!" Mike sobbed

"You sure, Mike? Professor Creel is a magnificent teacher. Just because you're Gryffindor and don't like him doesn't mean he is bad. Not every Slytherin is bad, y'know? Although you Wheelers seem to unjustly despise all of us!"

"That's just not true!" Mike scoffed, why was Will being such an asshole about this?

"I'm leaving! I'm gonna go find Max and Robin 'cause at least they'll be happy for me" spat Will.

"Will, you can't leave!" Mike tried desperately "It's raining" but it was hopeless, Will had already left him.

For the next few weeks, things were awkward between Will and Mike, their conversations had become stilted and forced until they stopped completely. The catalyst for this was Mike hearing rumors of Will and Max dating. Rumors he thought made sense, they were always together, they held hands sometimes and they were super protective of each other. Another reason why Mike felt betrayed by Will. Will hadn't told Mike he liked Max, how were they supposed to be best friends if they kept secrets from each other!

By the last days of school, Hogwarts buzzed with excitement.

The Quidditch match finals were just around the corner. The 2 Houses competing were Hufflepuff and Slytherin, which meant the 2 Byers Brothers were up against each other.

Both were quite the players as Will was pretty bold and didn't think twice of hitting the Bludger with his bat while Jonathan did fantastic saves as a Keeper.

Begrudgingly, Max invited The Party to come see Will but by the first part of the match, El had become bored of the game and told Mike to accompany her back to the school grounds.

Mike accepted since he thought Will wouldn't even care if he wasn't there, curiously, Max shot him a furious glare when he got up to leave.

Both him and El talked for hours, walking around aimlessly. El told him that her Dad had began to date Will's mom and that Will and her are going to be together a lot this summer.

Then, when the sun was almost down, they sat in the courtyard and El grabbed the side of his face, her cheeks were a rosy color and her mouth was in a shy smile.

Mike felt paralyzed, he knew what was going to happen. El was going to kiss him! Yet, he didn't feel that fluttery sensation his sister told him she felt when she kissed her best friend Barb and her ex-boyfriend Steve. His hands weren't all sweaty or clammy like Lucas described he feels when his near his crush. Nor was he a rambling, stuttery mess like Dustin! What did that mean? Why wasn't he feeling the things he should?

"Do you want to do this, Mike?" whispered El, softly

"Um, uh, Ye- Yeah. I do." He can't believe it took him so much willpower to want to kiss El. No, to want to kiss a girl.

El began to kiss him and he kissed her back. Still, nothing magical happened, it was the most boring thing ever. He was just kind of there.

He heard a noise from behind him and he turned around to find Will and Max staring at them, shocked. Max balled her fists and angrily stormed away muttering curses. Will on the other hand, stood there, mouth parted, tears welling up.

Mike knew he fucked up. He'd abandoned Will's important game to kiss a girl. He shouldn't have done that, he knows that.

Will turned around and left, wiping his face with his emerald Quidditch robe.

Mike didn't run after him, Mike turned to face El. She looked slightly sad but mostly confused, she didn't understand what happened.

The last day of school, Mike went over to the Slytherin table at The Great Hall.

"Hey, Will." he began

He felt Max glare daggers at him and Robin give him the stink-eye, several other Slytherins snickered. Billy, had a sneer plastered on his annoying and punchable face.

"Hi?" answered the smaller boy with confusion l

"I wanted to apologize for our argument, ok?" Mike apologized using his softest voice

"It's ok, Mike, really" Will dismissed with a small wave.

"No, it isn't I-" Mike insisted because it wasn't ok it was wrong.

"I said drop it, Mike" the brunet snapped. He did that a lot lately and when he did, he looked eerily similar to his father. It made Mike shudder. Mike shrugged helplessly and left to meet El and Lucas.

Lucas was blushing and El frowned at whatever Lucas was saying.

"So then me and Max kissed under the bleachers, yesterday and it was awesome!" Lucas gushed

Wait, Max and Lucas? Weren't she and Will dating? But if they kissed that meant that the duo were just friends and Mike had misunderstood everything. He'd fucked up again and Will was obviously not fine. Maybe the summer and spending time with El would help.

Mike ended his second year at Hogwarts wondering where exactly he'd gone wrong.

[masquerain-with-a-mask]

wait wait wait i can do the funniest shit ever in my wild card reo au

do you see where im going with this because this is honestly the funniest thing i can possibly do

[teatitty]

Yato Sakamoto and Kamui interactions are just a younger Kamui screaming at Sakamoto to take him seriously in a fight and Sakamoto going "well I'm a pacifist and have no interest in this sort of thing...also you're, like, 14 lmao??? I hope you get better soon"

[unproduciblesmackdown]

more info, via a couple of reviews:

"Is this the best, most exhilarating, most close-to-perpetual dancing ever to grace the Goodspeed Opera House stage?

It certainly could be.

The new stage adaptation of “Summer Stock” at the East Haddam theater has plenty to recommend it in terms of the canny script and the hummable songs. But it’s the dancing that leaves the biggest impression.

The show is jam-packed with choreography from Donna Feore, who also directs, that is thrillingly executed by the cast.

We’re talking: Gravity-defying kicks. Head-spinning turns. Male dancers lifting and tossing and catching the female ones. It runs the gamut from Cossack-dance athleticism to soft shoe grace, tap precision to Lindy hop energy.

How the cast manages to sing after executing these (literally) breathtaking numbers, I have no idea.

And how do they make it through two performances on some days? Amazing.

Also amazing: the fact that they do all this on Goodspeed’s small stage without making the space feel cramped.

So, yes, the dancing is phenomenal. But there’s more to the show than that.

This stage version of “Summer Stock” — which is enjoying its world premiere at Goodspeed — is inspired by the 1950 MGM movie starring Judy Garland and Gene Kelly. Writer Cheri Steinkellner, though, has reimagined the piece in many ways, making it better, stronger and propelled by a more modern sensibility. (Steinkellner’s writing credits range from “Cheers” to the Broadway adaptation of “Sister Act.”)

The foundational story, though, remains the same: A no-nonsense young woman named Jane is trying to save her family farm. Her actress sister (named Gloria in the version at Goodspeed) brings her compatriots to the farm to rehearse a show. Jane first spars with and then starts falling for Gloria’s beau Joe, the production’s director.

Steinkellner has also changed up the score, to great effect. While some tunes from the movie remain, she has pulled others that are in the public domain (such as “Accentuate the Positive,” “Paper Moon” and “It Had to Be You”), and she has woven them perfectly into various plot points and important emotional moments.

As director, Feore makes sure the whole enterprise has a dynamic spirit. It’s a story and a production that brims with optimism and cheerfulness.

Leading the cast is Corbin Bleu, who became famous with his work in “High School Musical” and has gone on to star in several Broadway shows, as Joe. Bleu is a true, and truly talented, triple-threat. He has a warm, welcoming presence as an actor; he also brings an authority to Joe so you believe he’s someone the actors respect and will follow. Bleu’s singing is strong and lustrous, and his dancing — particularly his tremendous tap ability — is … wow.

Arguably the biggest scene-stealer here is Veanne Cox, as the wealthy, snooty owner of huge property surrounding Jane’s. The way she trills dialogue can turn anything into a punchline. She can wave her arms about as her character repeats “l’amour” and generate audience laughs. When her character falls for the egoistic actor Montgomery Leach (played by J. Anthony Crane with Barrymore flair), Cox burbles with girlish romantic giddiness.

Danielle Wade does her own take on the Judy Garland role. She gives Jane a swagger and a tough façade that reveals a more human self during the course of the story. Wade’s most important feature is her voice, which is potent whether she’s finessing a ballad or powering through a big number. While she can’t compete with Garland’s renowned version of “Get Happy” (who could?), Wade does a good job in the number — choreographed and costumed in an homage to the original — that serves as the culmination of the production.

Arianna Rosario gets to play an interesting arc at Gloria. At first, Gloria seems to be a blithe, self-centered actress, but she later shows that she is quite the problem-solving producer. Rosario makes the transformation believable, as if Gloria is finally letting her real self come through.

The scenic design by Wilson Chin suggests the various elements of a Connecticut River Valley farm in the 1950s while still allowing room for the cast to burst into all of those big dance numbers. And the costume design by Tina McCartney provides a fun and functional take on country clothing of the era.

I will say that the second act could be tightened up (we don’t need to see so many beats of the rehearsal process), but, in total, this “Summer Stock” is sensational." [source]

(hooray for most directly explaining gloria's overall arc)

and the next review:

"A throwback to the golden age of Broadway and movie musicals, "Summer Stock" is a timeless, inspiring song-and-dance tale of good deeds, fairy tale showbiz, classic romance and backstage intrigue played out to such dazzling effect, you want to freeze frame it, take it home with you and watch it over and over again for pure fun and a let's-put-a-smile-on-your-face endorsement. This is Goodspeed Musicals at its best - old-fashioned musical entertainment designed to deliver by the bucket's load, stir the senses, rhythmically intoxicate you and dance up a continual storm of good cheer that's guaranteed to leave you breathless.

Animated. Airborne. Magical. Sweet-natured. Fresh-faced. Dance happy. It's all here, wrapped up in shiny gold ribbons and signature colors that complement and complete the picture with a technicolor flourish, a big bang and an internal logic that flows with appropriate style, stamina, full command and intent.

Adapted to the stage by Cheri Steinkellner, "Summer Stock" replays that popular let's- put-on-a-show conceit where everything rests of the big opening night, the box-office intake, the big kiss between the leading man and the leading lady and how a complete unknown saves the day right before the final fadeout. Here, struggling Connecticut farmer Jane Falbury decides to let her actress sister Abigail and her actor friends from New York use the family barn as a rehearsal space for their brand-new Broadway bound musical in exchange for doing the daily farm chores to raise enough money to keep the business from going completely under. One slight problem. During rehearsals, Jane finds herself falling for the show's handsome director, Joe Ross, who, happens to be engaged to the show's leading lady - her sister Abigail.

Staging "Summer Stock," director Donna Feore ("Chicago," "Billy Elliot," "A Chorus Line"), who doubles as choreographer, creates a loveable, intoxicating show that reels you in, grabs hold of you until the final curtain and lets you fall in love with every little detail, surprise, plot twist, joke, visual gag, one-liner and tilt of her jolly agenda while she articulates every element of this musical story with thrust, warmth, spin and splendid articulation. Directorially, she pulls it off spectacularly. No wrong moves here as "Summer Stock" catches fire with a spark, a gusto, a shine and a 1950s mentality infused with plenty of imagination, originality, style and flair.  More importantly, the production never loses sight of its origins, its functional plotting and its love of musicals of yesteryear despite well-intentioned doses of kitsch, takeaway humor, giddy backchat and story arcs right out of the MGM library of backlot moviemaking.  Feore, free spirit that she is, fuels the musical with a sharpened wit and sentiment that works especially well as does her decision to let "Summer Stock" remain rooted in the period from whence it came in terms of staging, development, expression and interaction. 

Moving from screen to stage," "Summer Stock" retains only four songs from the 1950 MGM musical. The addition of several new songs to the original version of the score turns the two-act musical into more of a showstopping event and adds clarity, luster and vintage spin to its already proven material, its let's launch into another song and dance routine blueprint and its firm grasp on characterization, story evolution and its happily ever after conclusion. At Goodspeed, there are 28 important, recognizable, smartly placed musical numbers. They are:  "Get Happy," "Happy Days Are Here Again/I Want to Be Happy," "Accentuate the Positive," "I'm Always Chasing Rainbows," "Always," "Always (reprise)," "It's Only a Paper Moon," "The Best Things in Life Are Free," "Dig for Your Dinner," "Me and My Shadow," "Howdy Neighbor, Happy Harvest," "Red Hot Mama," " 'Til We Meet Again," "You Wonderful You," "June Night," "Some of These Days," "Joe's Dance," "I'm Always Chasing Rainbows (reprise)," "It All Depends on You," "Always (reprise)," "Everybody Step," "Lucky Day," "How Ya Gonna Keep 'Em Down on the Farm," "Hinky-Dinky Parlez Vouz," "It Had to Be You," "Get Happy (reprise)" and "You Wonderful You (Finale)."

Musical director Adam Souza ("42nd Street," "Cabaret," "Next to Normal," "A Grand Night for Singing," "Because of Winn Dixie," "Rags") grabs hold of the "Summer Stock" score and allows it to breathe, gesticulate, excite, envelop and rhapsodize with the golden age sentimentality of MGM movie musicals and the timeless, larger-than-life spirit of old Broadway. Here, every song matters. Every song is important. Every song travels down memory lane. Every song is tuned to the max with sweet, centered, warm-heartedness. Every song fulfills its intended purpose. All of this is complemented by the strong, flavorful sound of Souza's orchestral team, all of whom share his tremendous sense of theatricality, musical interlude, impassioned communication and delight of the actual musical itself.  They are: David Uhl (bass), Sal Ranniello (percussion), Liz Baker Smith (reed 1), Andrew Studenski (reed II), Travis Higgins III (trumpet) and Matthew Russo (trombone). As with other Goodspeed musicals, Souza doubles as conductor and keyboardist. As "Summer Stock" zings and pops, pretty music every song unfolds with a contagious orchestral musical glow, matched by the splendid musicality of the entire cast who address the catchy, homespun music and lyrics with perfect harmony, rhythm, phrasing and nostalgic commitment. These elements heighten the on-stage mode of the production, its progression from Act I to Act II, its send offs, its pastiche and its electrifying, barn-raising influence and thwack.

As with any big stage musical, choreography is key to a production's success, its fluidity of form, its artistic expression and its accompanying dance routines. Here, Feore, as choreographer, gives "Summer Stock" a highly personal touch of invigoration and speedy excitement that is tipped and generated with wonderfully elongated inspiration, stamina and determination. This is star quality choreography that peaks, shines and tilts with clever build ups, catchy dance steps and bold, concentrated rhythms, moves and beats that joyfully celebrate 1950's musicals in all their technicolor glory.   As storyteller and dance interpreter, she brings great dimension and scope to the piece using techniques, styles, descriptions and an enriched canvas of thoughts and ideas that make their mark most engagingly. Everything that happens on the Goodspeed Musicals stage has been beautifully blocked, rehearsed and staged with such thrust and individuality, no two dance numbers are alike. In fact, once "Summer Stock" catches fire, there's no stopping it.  Creating a freshly minted fusion of moods, tableaus, lifts, twirls and swirls, Feore pays homage to the actual vintage look and mindset of the musical, its dance-friendly art form and its free-flowing feel of excitement and exhilaration. Hands pop. Arms move heavenward. Dancers smile and glisten as they passionately ignite into joyful visions of sweetness, passion, frenzy and syncopation. Everyone is lost in the moment illustrating the traditions, the conscience and the power of musical theatre, giving and getting the most out of Feore's phenomenal, ovation-worthy choreography. Trained, drilled and confident, they each get a chance to shine - and shine they do - all making strong impressions that will live long in memory.

Making his Goodspeed Musicals debut, Corbin Bleu, as Joe Ross, a character originated by Gene Kelly in the 1950 film version, creates a "Wow!" song-and-dance-man factor chock full of charm, personality, self-confidence and full-beam, champagne delightness that astounds, cajoles and sparkles with leading man gait and luxury like no other. No matter what he does, he's a proverbial triple-threat (i.e., a player who excels at acting, singing and dancing) who makes everything that happens on stage feel fresh, spontaneous, real, raw and very much in the moment. It's in his eyes. It's in his moves. It's in his expressions. Exhibiting a sweet, contagious rapport that extends far beyond the footlights, it's the performance of the year and one that Bleu exudes with a Gene Kelly/Fred Astaire aura of showbiz savvy, knockabout whimsy, graceful athleticism and sterling encapsulation. "Joe's Dance," a solo dance number in Act II performed by Bleu only furthers that notion.

In the role of Jane Falbury, a role made famous by Judy Garland in the original "Summer Stock" MGM musical, Danielle Wade lights up the Goodspeed Musicals stage with a breezy, intuitive musical comedy performance of real warmth and spirit that is a constant joy to watch. Veanne Cox, cast in the role of the wickedly devious Connecticut farming magnate Margaret Wingate, is jaw-dropping brilliant, using humor, music, dance and melodrama in divinely daft and glorious ways that prompt applause and laughter whenever she's in the limelight. It's a scene-stealing performance so seamlessly entrenched in glee and fiery abandon, Cox, would be the ideal choice to play narcissistic Broadway diva Dee Dee Allen in the 2024 summer presentation of "The Prom" at Playhouse in Park in West Hartford. I'll personally deliver the contract. Other memorable performances are delivered by Arianna Rosario (Gloria Falbury), Stephen Lee Anderson (Henry "Pop" Falbury), Gilbert L. Bailey II (Phil Filmore), Will Roland (Orville Wingate) and J. Anthony Crane (Montgomery Leach). A musical escape brimming with delightful songs, engaging performances and full-beam dance numbers, "Summer Stock" is not only a bubbly tonic for theatergoers of all ages, but one that kicks nostalgia into high gear with uncomplicated bliss, fizz and vintage sparkle. It sings. It dances. It pops. It dazzles. Like "42nd Street" which played Goodspeed Musicals last season, it overflows with Kelly/Astaire lightness, punch and precision, sunny vibes and well-played exactitude. The energy displayed here is fast and furious with first-night exhilaration and thrill paired especially well with Corbin Bleu's charming star turn, Danielle Wade's joyous "Get Happy" abandon and Veanne Cox's well-prepped, icy cool villain. This is musical theatre of the highest order - infectious, irresistible, glorious. Its leave-your-troubles-at-the-door/Let's-put-on-a-show mentality accelerates with sparkle and cherry pie goodness. And boy, do we need it now!" [source]

(the reference to jane's sister abigail uses the film's names: abigail becomes gloria in this production, which is the name of abigail's actor in the film, which also mirrors how the role of herb is now phil, also the name of herb's actor in the film)

(also shoutout to providing A Full, Chronological List Of Songs. noting that according to another interview, intermission would be between "you wonderful you" and "june night")

[hirokiyuu]

theres another universe out there where the yuu i invented was not yuujin and thus i am fully and completely obsessed with leojami. sadly that is not this universe.

[its-celery]

he really is and its hilarious

A law that not a lot of people know about is that tommyinnit is actually legally allowed to kill, which is why sometimes he will publicly execute random YouTubers on twitter

[thelightintheattic]

discovered meowing at bones but in a voice of a 50 year chain smoker

[luvmahae]

where you are ‣ lee haechan smau

summary: what the absolute fuck is up baby! fall semester marks the peak of greek life at ncu. the campus quad is filled with tents representing various fraternities and sororities with their letters proudly presented in front of each booth, all eager to recruit new members. as students return to campus, they are met with a flood of fliers and invitations to parties, mixers, and rush events. while you were walking through the crowd of eager freshmen to join these organizations, you bumped into someone very unexpected...

what do you do when you bump into the guy you hooked up with after a music festival during summer break? instead of the royal blue basketball jersey you first met him in, it was replaced by a varsity jacket with the letters reading "ΝΧΘ".

"haechan?"

pairing: fratboy!haechan x fem!reader

genre: smau, non-idol au, college au, fluff, nsfw/suggestive (mdni!) comedy, humor, slight slowburn, strangers to lovers, rave bae core? (am i in love with you or is it just the drugs?)

warnings: mentions of alcohol/substance usage (marijuana, mdma/ecstasy, lsd, cocaine), profanity, jokes about sex and death thrown around, both groups are out of pocket and tmi doesn't exist apparently... no ones safe! the boys gc is kinda questionable (this is where i say men deserve no rights!), haechan x reader met at an edm festival (the term rave bae will be said here and there. rave bae is someone you meet unexpectedly while raving, kinda like your temporary s/o for the duration of the rave or festival... smth like that!) disclaimer notice: these portrayals are fictional and are not intended to encourage or glamorize substance use.

playlist: where you are - john summit | club classics - charli xcx | intimidated - kaytranada, h.e.r. | high and i like it - it's murph, evalyn | what a life - john summit, stevie appleton | saving up - dom dolla | talk talk - charli xcx, troye sivan | mr useless - shygirl, sg lewis, club shy | atmosphere - fisher, kita alexander | thinking about you - calvin harris, ayah marar | gas pedal remix - john summit, subtronics, tape b, sage the gemini

notes: omg!!! my first post ever... honestly i've been debating to do this for a long time... now here i am :D ngl i lowkey based this off a personal experience (i am a changed woman now okay... spare me! 😭) my first lil fic dedicated to haechan!!! the playlist is highly edm biased with a sprinkle of brat. i just think it fits the vibe so well hehe. open to feedback and enjoy!!! ♡

status: ongoing!

taglist: closed!

profiles: live laugh love y/n (1), john summit fanboys (2)

intro: so.... edc next year?

one: comedown

two: wtf is college

three: boutta fuckin jump (written)

four: y/n’s eras tour

five: is my brain braining?

six: heyyyyyy 👀

seven: i know what u are…

eight: tequila ftw (written)

nine: ot3 timeout

ten: i want u 😩

eleven: drunk olympics

twelve: stuDYING

thirteen: agram ���😭

fourteen: gn haechan (written)

fifteen: team y/n

sixteen: options

seventeen: u did ur big one 😞

eighteen: h for harry styles

nineteen: kms postponed! (written)

twenty: haechan x y/n crumbs

twenty-one: how tf we feelin (written)

twenty-two: use protection 😏

twenty-three: missed connection

twenty-four: shhhh 🤫

twenty-five: enemies to lovers trope

twenty-six:

twenty-seven:

twenty-eight:

twenty-nine:

thirty:

[captainreecejames]

Can't Have a Good Thing || My ex is a footballer LS2 edition

[masterlist][my ex series masterlist]

summary you go from dating an american footballer to an american driver

pairings ex!christian pulisic x reader, logan sargeant x reader

warnings probably a little anti pulisic but i still love my baby

notes pictures are from pinterest so thank you to all those lovely users (as I wrote this my english teacher from 11th grade came into my job and it was not fun!)

May 2023 ynusername posted -------

liked by cmpulisic, reece and others

ynusername final chelsea game of the season, love you guys

chelseafc awww we love you too yn ❤️ by author

cmpulisic always love having you there ↳ ynusername wouldn't want to be anywhere else

username1 look at my girl dawg, chelsea is embarrassing her ↳ username2 please, christian didn't even play

reece once a blue always a blue ↳ username3 NAH WHY IS THIS SO CRYPTIC ↳ username4 you can't say shit like this then leave DUDE

username5 that chrisyn interaction screams for help ↳ username6 i wouldn't be surprised if they're not dating anymore but trying to keep up appearances ↳ username7 breakup statement incoming ↳ username8 can we get fabrizio to comment on wag breakups please!! ↳ username7 lol can you imagine a here we go! breakup is official! peak comedy

cesarazpilicueta 💙 ↳ ynusername love you too capitan!

July 2023 real life ---------

It’s been a rough few months in the house for the two of you. Christian’s time at Chelsea was most likely coming to an end, and you had just started a new project at work, so your time was filled with that. Nights spent making dinner and laughing together turned to plates left in the microwave and lights out early. Mornings started with short wake up kisses to hardly whispered goodbyes.

In fewer words, the relationship was falling apart. You barely knew what was going on in each others lives anymore, it’s no surprise when he tells you he’s leaving Chelsea.

Chris is still in Florida with his family, enjoying the last few days off before preseason. You had been with him for the 4th of July, but needed to fly back to London almost immediately for a new project and you’re exhausted. When he Facetimes you it’s almost 11:30 at night and your still sitting in your home office, but with how excited Chris is, he can’t tell that you’re operating on extremely low levels of energy. You want to be excited for him, but you can see the writing on the wall.

“Hey babe.” You know what’s coming, but it doesn’t make the shock any less. “I’ve got some big news.” He waits for you to say something, but all you do is blink and nod. “AC Milan are going to sign me.” He waits again for you to say something. “Did you hear me? I’m leaving Chelsea.”

“Yeah, I heard you.” Your lack of enthusiasm confuses Christian.

“Then why aren’t you excited?”

Your apathy turns to frustration quickly and you shift in the chair. “Because, Christian, I’m not just going to blow up my life in London to follow you to a new city. I’ve got a job here and it’s going well. I don’t want to have to start all over again. Not to mention learning a whole new language. Have you considered how isolating that would be for me?”

“So what, I just rot at Chelsea because you don’t want to move?” He is now just as defensive as you, words biting at the holes that have formed in your relationship, making them grow.

“I didn’t say that!” You sit up even straighter, putting your phone down against the computer so it stands on it’s own.

“Well it sounds like you don’t want to leave.”

“I don’t want to pack up my life and move to a new country where I don’t know anyone.”

You could see the fight leave his body as he came to the same realization you did. “What’s going to happen to us?”

“I think we’re done Chris.” You can feel your heart break that last little bit with the words you say. You love Christian, but with everything you’ve gone through, it’s not enough.

twitter ---------

September 2023 real life ------

In one hand you held your phone, looking down at the details of your train back to London, in the other a hot chocolate to warm you up in the brisk wind of Oxford. It’s how you missed the body in front of you and ended up falling straight on your ass because of it, hot chocolate splashing onto your shirt.

“Fucking hell,” you whispered, pulling your shirt away from your body so it didn’t burn.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry,” said an American accent. You groaned in your head, not wanting to deal with this. “I should’ve been looking where I was going.” They put a hand in your face, gesturing to help you up, which you took. 

“No, it was my fault, I was staring at my phone,” you told them as they pulled you up. He was strong, and also probably a little awkward as he was still holding your hand.

“Me too, so I really won’t let you take the blame.” His awkward smile was also cute, but you tried not to think that, it wouldn’t agree with your ‘no boys agenda.’ “Do you need another hot chocolate?” The cup was empty at your feet, making you wince. 

“Yeah, probably another shirt too.” It’s at that point that he realizes he’s still holding your hand, and he drops it.

“Let me get you one.”

“Don’t worry about it.” You’re still very early for the train, but travel anxiety is terrible and you want to leave soon.

“I insist.” Something about his smile and red cheeks makes you say yes to him, and you’re really not sure why. “I’m Logan, by the way.” He’s leading you back into the line of the cafe, smiling at you still.

“I’m YN,” you tell him.

ynusername posted ---------

liked by logansargeant, benchilwell, and others

ynusername exploring oxford finally

bsfinstagram babe you run into any quidditch players ↳ ynusername bitch you know i'm swearing off athletes

username7 damn why are you so beautiful

samkerr 💞 ↳ ynusername ugh bestie i love you

pulisick10 'SWEARING OFF ATHLETES?' Christian mate pulisic what did you do!?! ↳ username8 that is so fucking harsh though like pulisic really did a number on our girl here ↳ pulisick10 ben chilwell still in the likes tho ↳ username8 nah her and ben are friends, like ben was always close with christian and just cause he left doesn't mean that she can't be friends still ↳ username8 also she's still good friends with the women's team ↳ pulisick10 well that's cause the women are better ❤️ by ynusername and bsfinstagram ↳ username8 NOT HER LIKING THAT but also won't argue with that

logansargeant at least the weather was good ↳ ynusername youre right, thank you english sun who comes out once in a blue moon ↳ bsfinstagram I'm questioning things ↳ ynusername well you shouldn't

username11 she's sworn off athletes but has a formula 1 driver in her comments... ↳ username12 fake bitch ↳ username13 two people can be friends right? ↳ username12 she breaks up with christian because of the distance but is talking a driver like he isn't gone more than half the year, she's definitely fake for that ↳ username13 how do you know that's why they broke up ↳ username14 she doesn't she's just being a hater ❤️ by ynusername ↳ username11 damn all this fighting on my comment thread?

username12 not yn liking so many comments, do you read them ↳ ynusername gotta appreciate a good laugh ↳ username13 yn stalks her comments like a real one should

twitter ---------

yn's messages -----------

November 2023 yn's messages ------------

real life --------

Your hotel room is kind of a mess, with clothes thrown around and various pieces of paper on the floor. It’s not really a surprise to Logan, even though he hasn’t known you very long.

After a long day exploring New York City in fairly okay weather, the two of you are relaxing in your hotel room before dinner. “Can I ask you something?” Logan asks. He’s currently sitting in the desk chair, feet propped up on the desk and head hung back. 

“Go ahead.” You’re on your bed, laying like a starfish.

“Would you say yes to going on a date with me?” You sit up straight, staring at him with wide eyes as he doesn’t move.

“Are you asking me on a date?”

“No, I’m asking if you’d say yes to me asking you on a date.” His clarification makes you narrow your eyes, but he still doesn’t move. 

“I don’t think it’s a good idea right now.”

That gets him moving, turning the chair to look at you. “So would you say yes or no?”

“I’d say no right now.”

“What about in a month?”

“In a month, when we’re both back in England, I’d probably say yes.”

“Cool,” he shrugs, going back to putting his feet on the desk. “Then I’ll ask you again in January.”

ynusername posted ---------

liked by logansargeant, alexalbon and others

ynusername look who came to visit

lilymhe booooo bring me next time ↳ ynusername you're welcome whenever, he invited himself ↳ logansargeant literally not true you asked me to come ↳ ynusername stop lying! i wanted thanksgiving but you have this job that makes you fly across the world to drive a stupid car or something

oscarpiastri look at him jumping for joy for you ↳ ynusername yeah well, what can i say, I'm a dream come true

bsfinstagram ahhhh just under 2 weeks until you come home!! ↳ ynusername I missed you so much ↳ bsfinstagram debrief over wine incoming!

username18 nope she is definitely dating this driver ↳ username19 it's so weird cause like if she really broke up with christian because of distance then isn't this just so much worse ↳ username20 i don't think they broke up just because of distance, things were probably weird for a couple of months before hand cause she wasn't going to as many mens games, she was definitely going to the women's games though.

timothyweah did you get a hotdog from the hotdog guy? ↳ ynusername yes... why? ↳ timothyweah cause they're good and i just want to make sure that you did ↳ ynusername okay timmy

chelseafcw don't stay too long we miss you ↳ ynusername aww, i miss you guys too

May 2024 ynusername posted--------

liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris and others

ynusername Miami you can be pretty but you're on my shit list

landonorris no whyyyyy ↳ ynusername idk might have something to do with my boyfriend dnfing at his home race. ↳ landonorris oh, okay ↳ ynusername but i guess congrats on your win ↳ landonorris thanks ynnnnn! ↳ oscarpiastri someone is still drunk

logansargeant ohhh he's handsome ↳ ynusername yeah and he's got a jealous ass girlfriend so beware ↳ logansargeant love you too babe

username23 finally confirmed that they're dating only seven months later

[tacagen]

just came back to this and realized i really formulated it vaguely so you cant even say what i actually implied. elaborating: his ASS was CONVICTED after his first fight with barry and 100% on all the news since 'nothing ever happens in this damn time'!! his NAME is DIRECTLY LINKED TO THE REVERSE-FLASH IN THE ARCHIVES RIGHT BEFORE F*NISH L*NE!! NOT MENTIONING HIS 21ST CENTURY HISTORIC ACTIVITY(tho idk how exactly that works considering there are variants where reverse-flash's identity didnt make it to 25th century but there should be SO much documentation in 1 iron heights 2 ccpd+court since there mustve been trials to put him there in the first place 3 flash museum as it already existed in 21st century, using the information from 2 other sources above (which well. above all must be completely digitalized by 4 freakin centuries after. like cmon TF were they up to for that entire time if it didnt include making the info easier to access/find/etc at least once) so i cant see how that could possibly happen except for eo throwin all that shit fuck outta window at some point to keep the mystery for his pre-reverse era but then again he still needs all that info to check his own history and all the changes and it was shown to be in the archives (collected by other people before him) so? man i wish timey wimey actually made at least some sense in at least 1 flash variant. is it really too much to ask.)!! NO WAY THE KNOWLEDGE IS NOT PUBLIC!! EVERYBODY KNOWS!! ESPECIALLY PEOPLE WHO KNEW HIM FROM HIS PRE-SPEEDSTER ERA!! NOT EVEN MENTIONING THE MUSEUM STAFF SOME OF WHICH FALL ON THE PREVIOUS SPECTRUM AS WELL!!!! AND NO ONE CAN DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT CAUSE THE ONLY PRISON CAPABLE OF HOLDING SOMEONE OF HIS SPECTRE OF POWERS AGAINST THEIR WILL WAS BUILT BY HIM FOR PARADOX SINCE APPARENTLY HE IS THE ONLY COMPETENT PERSON OUT THERE and, well. thawne is obvs not stupid enough to include in the design his own cell (btw. does this mean that thawne as a time travelling time altering genius TM could be the one responsible for the complete incompetence and poor anti-meta/speedster equipment of police/gov forces/etc and lack of means of detention around his time so that he can do his silly little museum work and scheming (AND get to be the hero in case some outside force attacks since again no other compenent people and actual means of defence but him//renegades created by him and hunter??) and well. generally existing peacefully without worrying about getting imprisoned here too considering that even 21st century iron heights does, in fact, have the necessary kinds of technologies and use it successfully on meena and august and whoever else (not mentioning it was PERFECTLY CAPABLE to contain thawne himself for some time) because there REALLY is no other fucking explanation on how THOSE of ALL things are lost and forgotten in 25th as well.). the central city of 25th century just has to live with the fact there is this murderous speedster that still works a normal job, can do pretty much anything with the city and time itself (but actually usually doesnt because hes hyperfixated and busy running his precious museum but yk threat is still there.) and no one can stop him from it and with being fully aware of it all. also if it wasnt enough at least PART if not majority of 25th century public actually thinks he IS a hero after the paradox's defeat. the internet arguments about him must be unmatched. also i think he (and his museum tours especially) is an obscure tourist attraction now. like cc's people at this point be like look at our local little deranged squeak squeak from the flash museum that basically owns the city and can do whatever he wants and also dies an unreasonable amount of times regularly. his appearance was foretold by flash's history because that rat can time travel and you can literally see him both on display and explaining all that including his involvemet live on his museum tours. so silly. so fucking insane. where else could you possibly have this.

typed some Thoughts in the tags but then realized it should be a separate post.

[meglosthegreat]

I see a lot of posts on here talking about the Solas/Elgar'nan segment in Blood of Arlathan and how it's one of the best scenes in the game, and they'd be right, but I don't see enough people talking about how comically the whole thing is undercut by quite possibly the most poorly-conceived, terribly-implemented looney-tunes-ass sequence in gaming history that surrounds it.

Like you show up with your friends to this Venatori party, and you're like great, we're sneaking in! Time for disguises. How convenient that these Venatori guys all wear hoods, right? Should be a piece of cake if we're all, you know, wearing hoods that would helpfully hide our identities. But no. We all go waltzing in with our whole-ass faces exposed, you know, the group of guys that have been murdering Venatori left and right and who Elgar'nan and Ghilan'nain have definitely all seen in person before. Oh, and don't worry about walking into this notoriously racist elf-sacrificing cult if you happen to be an elf! You're only here in disguise so that you can rescue a GROUP OF ELVES THEY'RE GOING TO SACRIFICE but it's ok because you're dressed as a mercenary and not a dalish so it's all good don't worry about it :) :)

Then you get into this fucking party and oh my fucking god it's like they decided to take all of the most comically over-the-top stereotypes of villainy and put them on display. Because why not! The Venatori are all sickos anyway so of course they'd be out here doing sicko things! There's some guys pulling a halla apart with blood magic! There's other guys using slaves as benches! They're all laughing and joking about how EVIL they are, hahaha, how cool is that? The fucking guy from D'Meta's Crossing is here if you don't let him die, because he's a fucked up evil sicko too! You're supposed to be shocked at this hideous display; recoil in horror, even!

And who do you bring with you to help get through this crowd of absolute lunatics? NEVE FUCKING GALLUS. You know, the person so well-known in Minrathous that a Dalish elf living in Arlathan KNEW HER BY REPUTATION. Yup, Neve Gallus with her INTENSELY RECOGNIZABLE PROSTHETIC just waltzes up to some guy and he just lets her in. Because being EVIL also makes you incapable of coherent thought, apparently.

And then. AND THEN. You walk across the bridge where Elgar'nan makes his thought-sounds at you, and YOUR ENTIRE FUCKING PARTY is already there, just hanging out nbd. Also not wearing hoods or any kind of disguises that couldn't instantly be seen through by a five-year-old with amnesia but ok, cool. Why did we bother walking through all those sickos then when we could've just taken the secret back entrance like the rest of them, idk.

But just when you think you've reached peak stupidity, it keeps going. You're now standing there, at the front of a crowd of about twelve people, approximately five feet away from Elgar'nan himself, inexplicably blending in, when the big guy puts the mind control whammy on everyone. Oh no, you think. We've been found out! Here's the part in the plan where things begin to go wrong! NO. Your mage friends SECRETLY PERFORM MAGICAL GESTURES to block the mind control, and then you LITERALLY FUCKING SIDLE OFF STAGE LEFT without ANYONE NOTICING. I should reiterate that at this point, you are still about FIVE FEET AWAY FROM ELGAR'NAN and his fucking ARCHDEMON.

And to conclude this absolute comedy of idiocy, as soon as you enter back into combat mode, you immediately ditch all of your disguises. And of course then, ONLY THEN, Elgar'nan notices you've been there. Cut to the end of the actual good sequence, this dramatic conversation performed by excellent voice actors and written miles better than most other things in this game, and you reach your final prize: about six guys trapped in a little cube. Cool, you tell yourself. This was definitely worth it. You take your fade-to-black teleporter back to the Lighthouse and they're never heard from again.

This was the quest that broke me. This was the moment that all hope for Veilguard finally snapped. I consider myself to be a very resilient person in the face of camp and goofy writing, but this was too much disbelief for my brain to suspend. The mental gymnastics necessary to make this whole sequence make any kind of sense were simply beyond me. Even Solas's dulcet tones could not salvage it for me after that.

[the-flaneur]

the enemy of my friend is my enemy, but he's also his own worst enemy? so he's my friend? (nr6) | pt1

pairing: nico rosberg x hamilton!reader [smau]

summary: in an attempt to plan a surprise birthday party for your brother's 39th birthday, you enlist the help of his ex-??? to get into his apartment

warnings: none (i think)

a/n: unfortunately, there are too many pics so pls await pt2 😙

[masterlist] [requests]

-> instagram

y/n.hamilton

liked by lewishamilton, nicorosberg, mavxverstappen1 and others

y/n.hamilton guess who's backkkkkk....IT'S BRITNEY B*TCH 👀✌️

view all comments

user1 omg omg omg omg GUYSSSSSS i have been waiting for this day the entire year... SHE'S FINALLY BACK IN MONACO!!!

user2 i'm also in monaco rn, istg the stars are alinging for me to meet her !!!! 🤩 user 3 BRUHHHHH i wish that was me 😃😃😃 user4 i wonder why she's back though? user5 idk yk maybe to go see HER BROTHER WHO LIVES IN MONACO MAYBE???? 🙄

user6 i hope she hangs out with all the other drivers 😍 she wasn't at any of the gps this year

user7 i mean they're not really her friends, besides she was really busy this year user8 DID YOU JUST SAY THEY'RE NOT HER FRIENDS??? user7 i mean she's not the one driving in f1 is she 😐 user9 brother was not here for the grid x y/n shenanigans back in the 2010's user10 her and mark absolutely roasting the crap out of fernando and jenson for the grid penalty is still comedy gold user11 she basically adopted the entire grid after 2016, they're her babies 🤨 LIKED by maxverstappen1

lewishamilton i was not made aware of this????

y/n.hamilton sorryyyyy late flight arrangements???? 🥺👉👈 lewishamilton ok but where are you staying. i'll cancel it, you can just stay in my apartment y/n.hamilton no it's ok, i'm already staying with a friend :D lewishamilton wait whO lewishamilton don't IGNORE ME I KNOW YOU'RE STILL ONLINE user12 y/nnnnn 😭😭😭 user13 your honour they're literally the cutest yet most sibling siblings ever like girlie pop 🥲

user14 anyone else like see the nico rosberg like...or was that just me?

user15 ??? user14 ok maybe it was just me... lewishamilton what....? user16 bro's going detective mode now

friend1 Y/NNIEEEEE PLS GET ME SOME MORE CHOCOLATE FOR THE CAKE

y/n.hamilton shhhhhh you're ruining it already bro friend1 oopsie oh yeah, i forgot he actually follows you lmfao y/n.hamilton 💀 girlie plsssssss get some brain cells friend1 you stole all of mine :P user17 🤨🤨

-> instagram

y/n.hamilton

liked by lewishamilton, nicorosberg, mavxverstappen1 and others

y/n.hamilton roscoe with his favourite auntieeee ❤️

view all comments

user18 GIRLIE AINT FOOLING ANYONE FOR A SECOND, WHO IS THAT MAN IN THE SECOND SLIDE

user19 wait what???? ur kidding, ur kidding - i am not seeing no man there? user20 roscoe's looking extra cute today ☺️ user21 him in that last slide looking at y/n is devious side eye user22 @/user18 BROTHER I GOT U, THERE IS NO WAY THAT'S Y/N'S LEG user23 also y/n would not be caught dead wearing chinos in bed, it's def a man 👀

user24 OK BUT THE REAL QUESTION IS WHO??? CAUSE LEWIS IS IN PARIS SO....

user25 nahhh it's for sure whoever y/n's seeing, no way would lewis let a random stranger near his child user26 i thought y/n's been single for a while??? she got a new boo? user27 idk maybe, i mean she's been pretty out of the spotlight this year, i wouldn't be surprised

user28 ARE WE JUST GOING TO IGNORE THE NICO ROSBERG LIKE???

user29 NO CAUSE LIKE HE ALSO LIKED HER LAST POST, ANDDDD THIS IS LIKE THE FIRST TIME POST-BROCEDES FALLOUT 😨 user30 guys i think lewis might just implode if he thinks that's nico rosberg sitting with roscoe user31 seeing by his silence, i think he already has...

maxverstappen1 can charles, lando i swing by after padel practice 😄 we wanna say hi

y/n.hamilton to me or the baby? 😔 maxverstappen1 im not abandoning my grid mum like this 🤨 only lando would, considering he's ruining the wdc narrative arc right now user32 y/n and max in 2016 was peak, especially after spain 😭 AHHHHHHH I MISS HER AT THE PADDOCK SO MUCH landonorris you snooze you lose verstappen, but i would also never abandon y/n :( y/n.hamilton lando.... landonorris i let him have the padel point mother 🥲

[next]

permanent f1 taglist (comment or msg me to join)

@charlesgirl16 @tallrock35 @sweate-r-weathe-r @unlikelystay

© the-flanuer || do not copy, rewrite or translate any of my work on any platform.

[iamgonnagetyouback-recs]

SIRIUS BLACK.ᐟ

a little list of my favorite stories ୨ৎ remember to be kind, reblog, and support the wonderful authors who share their magic with us.ᐟ

NOTE ಇ. none of these stories belong to me ♡ if you’d like your fic removed, just send me a message, and i’ll take care of it!

date by @sun-kissy

⁀➴༯ sirius for some reason thinks you have a crush on regulus

REVIEW ୨ৎ oh my god the tension in this had me actually holding my breath, san. sirius being all dramatic and broody while reader is just exhausted with potions?? perfect. but then the confrontation?? my heart hurt for both of them. sirius being jealous and insecure and reader being so confused but so soft when she realizes what's happening. and the james/regulus mention?? peak comedy. the ending was so sweet, i'm actually kicking my feet

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ୨ৎㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

forever by @/sun-kissy

⁀➴༯ you're cold, and you're in love with sirius

REVIEW ୨ৎ this was absolutely gorgeous. the tenderness, the pining, the way every little movement is soaked in love—it’s stunning. you have such a delicate way of writing sirius, san, i love it! the smoking detail was such a perfect addition—how he doesn’t put it out but still adjusts for you, how you bought an ashtray just for him. it’s intimate in the way that truly knowing someone is intimate. and that cuddle request??? i nearly stopped breathing. the way reader braces for rejection only to be met with sirius’ sure, get over here, babe—it wrecked me. and then the way he pulls her closer, holds her like it’s second nature? absolutely everything. “my arms have no curfew, sweetheart. they’re content to hold you as long as you please.” —i’m going to be thinking about that line for days. i’m in awe.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ୨ৎㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

right where i want to be by @appocalipse

⁀➴༯ it's only when lily accidentally spills amortentia on you and all you can smell is cigarettes and dog fur that you realize you're in love with sirius — probably the only person in the world you shouldn't be in love with

REVIEW ୨ৎ oh this hurts in the best way. the slow, creeping realization, the way sirius just knows and won’t let her run from it, the tension??? i’m actually losing my mind. the teasing, the softness, the way he says i want you like it’s the most obvious thing in the world??? i need to lie down. no one disturb me, except maybe you amy cause well you wrote this

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ୨ৎㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

shy!reader by @moonstruckme

⁀➴༯ bf!sirius teasing reader about something, and it actually hurts her feelings quite a lot? maybe she's always thought she's to shy for him, and he teases her about being quiet and it just hurts so much that he sees her just like everyone else does? like she thought he understood her, but instead he's teasing her about something she's really insecure about

REVIEW ୨ৎ this is so soft i could cry. sirius just knows her, and even when he messes up, he listens, he cares. the way he apologizes??? instantly, genuinely, with no ego—i’m in love. and the way he tucks her into his space so easily, so naturally, like she belongs there??? i’m melting. i now identify as a puddle of tears from all this fluffiness

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ୨ৎㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

clingy!sirius by @inkdrinkerworld

⁀➴༯ sirius being clingy and your friends teasing you guys

REVIEW ୨ৎ this is the most disgustingly adorable thing i’ve ever read. sirius is just so in love and unashamed about it, and everyone else is exasperated but also just accepting of his dramatics. like yeah, of course he buries himself under her shirt like a needy puppy, what else is new?? i am weak

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ୨ৎㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

kids by @/inkdrinkerworld

⁀➴༯ you are unsure about having kids

REVIEW ୨ৎ oh this is so soft i actually can’t breathe. the way they’re so open with each other and sirius just listens???? no judgment, just love???? and the way he reassures her without trying to change her mind??? “we can keep our family just like this” i’m actually going to cry. and then the stupid little “and a cat” moment like please. and him being like “i don’t think i could put someone over you” like sir. that is the most sirius black thing i’ve ever heard. i love them so much this fic is everything

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ୨ৎㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

i got you first by @thatdammchickennugget

⁀➴༯ "if i scare you tonight, you'll owe me a kiss." with sirius black but in the end he ends up getting scared

REVIEW ୨ৎ oh, this is delicious. sirius trying so hard to get a reaction out of her, only for her to completely turn the tables on him?? absolutely love. and that moment in the maze? when she flips the game on him, and he just folds under her touch?? yeah. that man is gone. completely and utterly wrecked by her. the way he just stares and then that lazy grin—i swear, i felt that in my soul. also, the fact that their first kiss isn't rushed or desperate, but soft and slow? sirius black, you are in love. and so am i with this fic

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ୨ৎㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

sober feelings by @lovemenotts

⁀➴༯ bsf!reader with him out of the blue suggesting 'what if we kiss but not in a dating way?'

REVIEW ୨ৎ oh my god. oh my god. this was everything. the casual suggestion like it’s nothing while my heart is combusting?? sirius being all cocky but then immediately spiraling after??? the way he was so worried the next day i'm gonna cry. and then the confession??? i am on the floor. “we should’ve kissed as friends a long time ago” sirius please be serious about me next

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ୨ৎㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

yellow hearts by @nottswitch

⁀➴༯ the times you put yellow hearts around his name, and the times he put them around yours

REVIEW ୨ৎ this was so soft i’m actually going to cry. the progression from absolute mortification to comfort and love??? sirius teasing but also so gentle???? the yellow hearts showing up again and again??? and the honeymoon bit oh my god. their bickering is so stupid and adorable and so them. the fact that they get their little happy ending and it’s literally framed in yellow hearts. i’m unwell

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ୨ৎㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

bad dog by @lupinsversion

⁀➴༯ sirius has a bad habit of flirting with others, especially in front of his girlfriend. has she finally had enough?

REVIEW ୨ৎ oh he DESERVED that bonk on the head. “bad dog” is actually the funniest and most fitting reaction ever. like yes, he’s sirius black, of course he’s going to be a little shit about flirting, but also? he needs to learn. and i love that james and remus are calling him out too because yeah, it’s “harmless” but it’s also not harmless when it clearly hurts his girlfriend. sirius sulking about it and realizing he actually feels bad?? good. let him sit in his wrongness and learn from it. this was so well done, i loved it but ahem mak i think i speak for all when i say part is needed

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ୨ৎㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

a marauders guide to siblings by @ellecdc

REVIEW ୨ৎ this was absolutely delightful. james potter and his love for love, his pure dedication to making this triple date happen—it’s so him. the way he just won’t take no for an answer, and how everyone else is reluctantly dragged into his chaos, is peak marauders energy. and the dialogue? oh mama. i love how everyone interacts here, from sirius being completely against it because of the “googly eyes” problem, to remus and regulus just being exasperated with the entire situation. and the moment james finally gets what he wants, only to immediately start overthinking it and worrying about the sibling connections?? absolutely hilarious. and sirius being all soft for reader, saying she was worth the nonsense? perfect. this was so fun to read, i adored every second of it!

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ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤmain blog ￫ @iamgonnagetyouback

[hotvintagepoll]

Propaganda

Peter Falk (The Great Race, Robin and the 7 Hoods)—let me just quote Frank Capra: "the entire production was agony ... except for Peter Falk. He was my joy, my anchor to reality. Introducing that remarkable talent to the techniques of comedy made me forget pains, tired blood, and maniacal hankerings to murder Glenn Ford (the film's star)." i also just find scrungly little guys to be the peak of attraction.

Omar Sharif (Funny Girl, Lawrence of Arabia)—he and Peter O'Toole didn't have the heaviest "we're fucking" energy in Lawrence of Arabia for nothing!

This is round 4 of the bracket. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage man. Gentle reminder from admin that the propaganda cuts off at 1970, so anything made after that point will not be included.

[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]

Peter Falk propaganda:

"listen Peter Falk saved the day for me in robin in the 7 hoods. he saved me in it's a mad mad mad mad world. he damn right resuscitated me in the great race. every movie this man is in is made better by his presence and he should eat the competition alive."

Submitted: "1:56:30 on for Peter Falk's ass in It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World. yes he falls off a building yes he drives a cab yes he hates the cops"

Omar Sharif propaganda:

[cyberels]

thinking about modern loser!ellie as ur gf :3c

modern!abby version here!!!

requests are open btw please i’ll write for ellie or abby

18+ sfw & nsfw

-> sometimes she’ll send u random ass pictures she finds funny

-> does the thing where she pretends to swerve off the road while she drives cuz it makes you laugh

-> she SPAMS you with tiktoks

-> every time there’s video of an old guy on her fyp that has 2 likes she’ll send it to u and be like “thought this was joel”

-> the guy looks nothing like joel

-> pretends to have a fear of thunder so she can use every thunderstorm as an excuse to cuddle you

-> “babe i’m so scaredddddd please😣😣😣 im shaking”

-> CANNNOT keep secrets from u

-> she’ll plan surprise dates and when you ask where the two of u are going she’s like “…nowhere…”

-> she’ll have to be silent the entire drive because if she speaks she will immediately reveal entire date

-> she HATES cringey pet names

so obviously you call her them all the time

-> she’s in line to buy smth and she’ll ask u for her wallet and u’ll hand it to her and say some shit like “here u go baby snuggle bear🥰”

-> the look she gives you LMFOAODKSLDKDDK

‘😦’

-> literally looks like u just killed her first born

-> does that “i hardly know her!” joke all the time

-> if no one laughs at her jokes she’ll tap on her hand and be like “uh, is this thing on?”

-> she thinks this is peak comedy

-> she’ll find silly things throughout her day that remind her of u

-> she takes pics everytime she sees a heart shaped object and sends it to u

-> absolutely has to get u a little treat or gift when she goes out, candy, flowers, etc. anything u might like she WILL buy

nsfw ‼️ 18+

-> SENDS U STUPID ASS REACTION MEMES AFTER U SEND NUDES

-> omg u and her buy stuff off adam & eve sometimes so she signed up for texts

-> and every time she gets a text she’ll send u a screenshot like “great news babe the butt blaster is 40% off!”

-> when y’all first starting having sex she’d be so awkward 😭😭😭😭 she couldn’t take herself seriously

-> eventually warmed up and started getting more confident

-> ellie williams is a sub i’ll die on this hill

-> but she’ll def try almost anything at least once to see if she likes it

ok that’s all for now love u all

masterlist