#pay it out of pocket
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Who needs sleep when you can bitch to your friends and brother and about the STUPID ASS decisions your city government has made
#cookie talks#they're adding fucking metered parking to downtown and nearby areas#way to absolutely fucking discourage people from going downtown after all the years of effort thats been put into revitalizing it!!!!!!!!#and im sure nothing will be done to help out public transportation š#gotta fuck over all the small businesses yknow#and its not like there ISN'T some paid parking downtown????? but now they have to EXPAND it and get rid of a ton of the free parking#cheapest price shown so far for 2 hours is 6 dollars? im going to fucking murder you woth my mind#businesses without private lots are going to have to shell out for monthly parking passes for their employees or make their employees#pay it out of pocket#im going to rip you from limb to limb [Redacted] city government
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Crazy that they make you go to work to get a paycheck. I really think my night job should have given me paid paternity leave. Donāt they know Iām a single father?
#i havenāt been to my night job in WEEKS#I have to start going again now tho bc Joeyās appointment is coming up#and Iām paying for Bugās vet costs out of pocket. feels wrong to ask Doc to support my fostering addiction#my post
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you have to go to work so you can pay for your doctor, who is not taking your insurance right now, and if you say i can't afford the doctor's you are told - get a better job. it is very sad that you are unwell, yes, but maybe you should have thought about that before not having a better job.
(where is the better job? who is giving out these better jobs? you are sick, you are hurting - how the hell are you supposed to be well enough for this better job?)
but you go to the doctor because you had the nerve to be hurt or sick or whatever else. and they tell you that it is because you have anxiety. you try your best. you are a self-advocate. you've done the reading (which sometimes pisses them off worse, honestly). you say it is actually adding to my anxiety, it is effecting my quality of life. so they say that you are fat. they say that all young people have this happen to them, isn't it a medical marvel! they say that you should eat more vegetables. they say that you probably just need to lose a little more weight, and that you are faking it for attention.
(what attention could this doctor possibly give? what validation? that's their fucking job, isn't it?)
there is always a hypochondriac, right. someone always tells you about a hypochondriac. or someone who is unnecessarily aggressive during the worst days of their life. or someone looking "for a quick fix". or some idiot who wasn't educated about how to properly care for themselves who just abandons their treatment. and again, the hypochondriac, the overly-cautious hysteric. these people don't deserve to be treated like humans (right), and since you might be one of these people, you also don't get treated like a human. because those people can really fuck with the system, you now have to pay for it. and besides. you're actually probably faking it.
(more often than not, you find a 2:1 ratio of these stories. for every "hypochondriac", there are 2 people who knew something was wrong, and yet nobody could fucking find it. the story often ends with pointless suffering. the story often ends with and now it's too late, and it's going to kill me.)
you are actually just making excuses. someone else got that procedure or that diagnosis and he's fine, you should be fine too. someone else said they watched a documentary about other inspirational people with your exact same condition, maybe you should be inspirational, too. you're just too morbid. your pain and your experience is probably just not statistically concerning. it is all self-reported anyway, and you're just being a baby.
(once, while sitting down in the middle of making coffee, you had the sudden, horrible thought - i could kill myself to make the pain stop. you had to call your best friend after that. had to pet your dog. had to cry about it in the shower. you won't, but that moment - god, fuck. the pain just goes on and on.)
you know someone who went in for routine surgery and said i still feel everything. they told her to just relax. it took her kicking and screaming before they figured out she wasn't lying - the anesthetic drip hadn't been working. you know someone who went in for severe migraines who was told drink water and lose weight. you know someone who was actively bleeding out and throwing up in the ER and was told you're just having a bad period.
in the ER there are always these little posters saying things like "don't wait! get checked today!" and you think about how often you do wait. how often the days spool out. you once waited a full week before seeing the doctor for what you thought was a sprained wrist. it had actually been broken - they had to rebreak it to set it.
but you go into the doctor. the problem you're having is immediate. the person behind the counter frowns and says we're not taking your insurance. you will be paying for this out-of-pocket.
they send you home with tylenol and a little health packet about weight loss or anxiety or attention deficit. on the front it has your birthday and diagnosis. you think about crying, and the words swim. it might as well say go fuck yourself. it might as well say you're a fucking idiot. it might as well say light your money on fire and lie down in it. and the entire fucking time - the problem persists.
it's okay. it's okay, it's just another thing, you think. it's just another thing i have to learn to live with.
#spilled ink#warm up#can you tell what i'm mad about today specifically#i will say that there are a LOT of things that go into this. like a lot. this is ungendered and unspecific for a reason#it isn't just sexism. it's also racism. and ableism. and honestly classism.#and before a healthcare professional reads this as a personal attack: i understand ur burnt out#we are ALSO burnt out. your situation is also dire. this is not an attack on you.#this is a commentary on the incredible amounts of bigotry that lie at the heart of capitalism#where people have to pay money out of pocket to be told to fuck off.#your job is important. so is our humanity. and if you cannot accept that people are fucking mad as hell#at the industry - you are probably not listening .#anyway at some point im gonna write a piece about sexism specifically in medical shit#but i don't want terfs clowning in it bc they can't understand nuance#> it is true that ppl w/a uterus are more likely to experience medical malpractice & dismissal globally#> it is also true that trans people experience an equally fucked up and bad time in the medical field#> great news! the medical industrial complex is an equal opportunity life ruiner :)#(if you find it necessary to go into a debate about biology while discussing medical malpractice#i want to warn you that you're misunderstanding the issue. because guess what.#cis MEN might experience this. particularly black men. particularly disabled men.#so YES having a uterus can lead to more trouble for you. but this happens a LOT.#instead of fighting those ALSO experiencing your pain.... try working WITH them.#which btw. is like. actual feminism.)
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why dont u just replace him leon
dbh au
#ethan winters#leon kennedy#lethan#resident evil#rebhfun#resident evil fanart#dbh au#leon spending thousands of dollars on this one andriod#also i like to think that ethans beauty mark is actually a defect that was made during production#and hes the only one of his models that have it#they try to replace ethan without telling leon but he knows right away and freaks out#tw blood#i think?#he has to pay out of pocket becuase his department isnt willing to pay for repairs and would rather trash ethan#leon is very against that
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Having unrealistic dreams (fantasies of being taken seriously by medical professionals),,,
#we are so tired itās not even funny#watch us have to pay out of pocket for a psych appt to get help in a country where it should be free#like ohā¦ā¦ another month of money spent on one (1) appointmentā¦.#we are so normal about the medical system (/sarcasm)#actually disabled#disability#disabled#complex disability#mhsn disability#disabilties#physical disability#mental health#physically disabled#mental illness#autism#autistic#asd#autism spectrum disorder#*screaming*
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āIāve done the math, thereās no solution. Weāll never lastā
#that one ref#ouh ouuuuhhhhdhheb get these children OUT of my head. they are not paying rent smh. EVICTED#theyre so cute i will keep them safe in my pocket actually#hjwbewhwjwhjsjsjebsjdns#ive just been. listenjnf to sad songs and thinking abt them ngl.#hear me out. cop car is so gregory. HEAR ME OU[i am forcibly dragged offstage]#ššš man#beckory
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blessings roll call!!!
#been far too quick to complain lately. I gotta remember to be thankful too so here goes:#thankful for the moderate weather and the rain!#and also my dark green raincoat with a giant hood and pockets#donuts at staff meeting this morning#my friend is getting me tea while she's out (and said she has a gift card so I don't have to pay her back. she's truly the sweetest)#changing my major is moving along sooo slowly but it is moving and maybe God is trying to teach me patience (again)#Christmas in July is tomorrow!#I have my Secret Santa gift all ready and just need to wrap it#also I think the girls in the activities I teach are having fun and learning things#and even though everyone on staff is so tired this week we are all pulling together and supporting one another#is it a perfect hunky dory time? no.#is it gonna be ok in the end? yes#is it worth it? also yes.#anyway feel free to join me in being thankful. it doesn't fix the problems but it does help obsess over them a lot less.#*gripping the sink* I WILL be grateful I WILL
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Watcher fans sure are entitled and a little insane, ngl. "No one is going to sign up for your service! We're all poor! You've made the worst decision, and you'll be back in no time!" Saying this directly to the creators really reminds you of how low the respect for people you don't personally know has gone. I miss the forth wall between creator and audience.
I get and fully understand not having the money to support them, but... Watcher does have fans with money. A lot of them actually. They have merch sales. Their live tour sells out most venues. They have thousands of supporters on Patreon, where the cheapest tier is $5. They're able to gauge the rough finances of their staunchest supporters; that's how they landed on the subscription price. Yes, this move will reduce their viewership in sheer numbers, but to say all of their fans are broke and none will follow/support is factually incorrect.
It may not be a decision everyone agrees with, but severing the limitations of advertisers and youtube in favor of artistic freedom is a good thing. Yes, even if it comes with a loss of revenue. They understand that risk.
Also, I'm begging people to stop treating this like "another Netflix" or something and instead look at it as, "I am supporting a creator I like, similar to Patreon." They literally said in the video that they don't care if you share accounts. Get five friends, and you'll pay $1/mo.
I hate feeling compelled to rant in favor of their decision because I have my own reservations about whether it's the best move. However, I know it's not a choice they made lightly, and I like to think they understand that they'll need to branch out like crazy to entice subscribers.
#Fair-weather fans#I speak as someone currently undecided if I'll sign up for their service or not#I have my own budget to consider#But the waves of people poor-mouthing AT Watcher directly is ridiculous and embarrassing#āThey're underestimating how many of us are poorā#Okay but that's not how business works#They just need enough people who aren't poor#and they may well have those numbers#Do you think they would have made such a drastic decision if they didn't???#If they want to focus on fans who support them even if their hard work isn't free that's their choice#People are trying to be so anti-capitalism on this they've actually circled back around to saying#āJust take ad revenue from these companies so they can profit off your content and I don't have to pay out of MY pocket.ā#That's... that's not the anti-capitalism stance you think it is#Maybe (and this is crazy) asking for a few dollars directly instead of through the vehicle of youtubeā googleā and all its advertisers is#... not spitting on the fans?#Please stop trying to guilt small content creators to their face while simping for large corporations#Watcher
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have my first therapy appointment in an hour. gonna shrivel up into a husk
#personal#need a therapist letter for top surgery though so...sigh#<- even if i dont go thru insurance. its so silly#like mm yeah yknow im willing to pay out of pocket for this procedure#but idk. are you REALLY sure? like be fr šš
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>mfw i realize the investors of the royal trading company i hired myself out to as land-marine security have bet their entire livelihoods and dreams for the future on a doomed project and i just could not care less about any of them.
Pocahontas (1995)
#'''those boys'''' :3#king bitch john smith#john smith#disney john smith#disney's pocahontas#disneyedit#pocahontasedit#pocahontas meta#pocahontas#disneygif#pocahontasgif#queso*gif#queso*edit#john 'cunt montague' smith saying some more out of pocket shit about his fellow englishmen#this man. fucking Hates the people he's here with#there's no way he doesn't do more than tolerate them all. he's Constantly pulling anti-social shit like this#even how he indulges thomas reads very much as 'tolerance for the kid' to me#from the settlers' perspective the revelation that Virginia has no gold is Life Ruining News#and john's response is to Laugh. the virginia company is falling apart john. and you're LAUGHING#this is a good time to remember that john's not actually there as a ''settler'' himself#HE'S not personally invested in the company. he's there to protect the investors' interests. for PAY.#he's a hired gun: his job is to make sure nobody dies too badly on this venture#and he's good at his job! he's a damn professional. he doesn't need to LIKE them to give a shit about them all surviving.#hell part of his job is working with and maintaining order among the company for RATCLIFFE#and they HATED each other on SIGHT.#pocahontas (1995)
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spent 3 hours last night panic searching for doctors to help me with my fibromyalgia. They are all either scams, extremely expensive boutique options (but are actually good apparently, if you have the money), extremely expensive scams, or have never heard of fibromyalgia and kick you out after 15 minutes.
#wrenfea.exe#apparently theres a thing called direct cost now#where the doctors spend like 2 hours with you and do all this testing and only take on a limited amount of patients#but they dont take insurance and are expensive#so you still need insurance for like. hospital stuff#but also have to pay out of pocket hundreds of dollars#if i had the money id do it since i already spend a ton of money on doctors that dont give a fuck about me#so might as well spend them on doctors that do#all the holistic care around me is scams for rich old ladies#my fibromyalgia symptoms are really holding me back#im so tired and achy and foggy and im so frustrated#i want to do things#i want to do my job well#but all the searching was fruitless#ive already seen a rheumatologist and she sucked#and none near me work with fibro patients#no neurologists do either#chronic disability#chronic pain#spoonie#fibromyalgia#disability
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100,000 dollars is not a lot of money.
it is also a lot more money than i will ever have. my student loans make up half of that - they're coming back, i'm told, like we all bounced back recently. the other day while paying for gas to go to work, i overdrew my account without knowing it.
i sat in the car and looked at the charge and tried to do the math. where the fuck is the money even going? i don't live extravagantly. i live in a hole in the ground, in an apartment the size of a sneeze; covered in ants. yes, i wanted to live close to a population center. maybe that's my fault. i've downloaded the apps and i've spoken to the experts and i've cut back on excess. i can't help the pharmacy bills or the medical debt.
i have a good, well-paying job. when i googled it to see if i was getting a fair salary, i found out i'd be making "upper middle class" money. which doesn't make sense - is "upper middle class" now just "able to afford a one-bedroom without a roommate". when i was younger, upper-middle meant a nice big house and a backyard and vacations and not flinching about eating at a resturant.
i was talking to my friend who is a realtor. he said 100,000 dollars is extremely cheap for housing. he's not wrong. 100,000 dollars would change my life. 100,000 dollars also won't really buy you anything. it could get you out of debt, potentially, if you were lucky and had a certain amount of scholarships to tack onto your degree. you could pay off the car and then have enough left over for "spending" money. how fucking amazing. one vacation, maybe two if you're thrifty. and then - like magic - the money would evaporate into nothing. people would sigh and tell you see, you should have put it into savings! like "upper middle class" people can't afford to value "actually living" over squirrelling wealth. you should spend your life only in scarcity. like that is what made the rich people all their real "actually a lot of money".
100,000 dollars would literally set me free. it also would just set me back to "earning normally" instead of paying down debt into infinity. god, do you know how many of us just want that? that our first thought is we could stop scrambling and just be free of debt if we won the lottery? that we don't even necessarily need to stop working - we just wouldn't have to worry about failing or falling?
and. at the same time. 100,000 dollars is next to fucking nothing.
#writeblr#me paying my taxes this year:#haha good to know im literally doing more for my community out of my tiny apartment#than most corporations will do in their entire scope! :) these motherfuckers will NEVER pay taxes!!!#bc they lobby others to be sure we CHOKE :) !!!#i hope this is clear like. this isn't someone being like ''haha if i got 100k it wouldn't be a big deal''#it's more like. the gap between corporations and the ppl WORKING in those corporations#has become HORRIFIC. 100k to the company i work for is like. pocket change to them.#and it is LIFE CHANGING for me.#they could cut me a check for 100k tomorrow and not even budge their margin of error
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my fucking god damn god fucking shit insurance is the wrong plan for my PCP to be able to accept. so I can't get my prog. I can't do my labs for this month. I have to wait until fucking November to try again. I hate the american healthcare system, eat a dick and choke on it you fucking shit stain of a goddamn idea of a healthcare system. what a backwards fucking garbage dump, I hate it I hate it I hate it!!!!! God fucking fuck why is it so hard to see a goddamn doctor!!!!!! fuck!!!!!! im gonna fucking cry!!!!!!!!! FUCK
#fuck it#going to go thrift shopping and might go buy some chicken wings to make me feel better#i need something cause im trying not to want to kermit#how humiliating it is to basically be told āhey your insurance card declined#and your only choices are pay $160 out of pocket minimum just to be seen or cancelā#idk it just fucking sucks and im so upset#and i dont even have anyone i can go to rn for physical comfort#my partner's asleep. my bestie just got home from work and will likely be by the time i get home. i dont have any other friends who live#near me.#idk. fuck it. whatever
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The American healthcare system is such a fucking joke
#Iāve literally been paying for dental insurance since January#only to NOT be able to find a dentist near me that accepts this insurance anymore?#so now Iām literally calling places to see how much it would be out of pocket for a cleaning#when I fucking have insurance#this is nuts
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maybe i should try and see if i can get lasik
#vision insurance is stupid#on top of health insurance being stupid#even with insurance i had to pay so much out of pocket for my most recent set of glasses#it won't fix the rest of me but maybe it will fix my eyes
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Lee t/ng xu/n brainrot got me drawing* actual kink stuff for the first time in. ? ! (*drawing = hurriedly scribbling out the most sloppy lazy sketch before my grace period is up-)
slowly going back to my roots .. srry to the fluff/safe tk crowd but i like my men crying and begging lol š
Cutest hero monkey boy, not a bad bone in his body, sweet n pure soul = break him!! break him in half!!!!!
#feet tickling#tickle#i am legally obligated to keep this out of the tag#if i had a dollar for every time ive mentally called this fucker cute#i could pay for my hearing aids out of pocket + a back up pair#when i can Actually draw again without feeling like a cactus ouhhh i swear....
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