#particularly if it feels like canon doesn't line up with itself

[aparticularbandit]

Ah I see you finishd dr2! Great! I want to talk to you about it! But you block your comments and only let people you follow message you and it feels to open to just repost in the open I leave a ask because I saw from scrolling you have thoughts and I can explain them! As a fellow Junko analizer and lore master I'd love to help anyway I can so please let me offer you this invitation

I'm sorry that commenting on posts feels more open! But I made that decision re: comments (only people I follow and who have followed me for a week) and messages for my own safety. (Because porn bots suck and I don't want to deal with that.)

And with messaging - the most fun I've had in the DR fandom so far (and usually in most fandoms this holds true) is having those sorts of discussions in the open so that other people are included. I've liked the yes and aspect of thinking about the games and the characters with @tobiasdrake and @thebibliomancer (and with @cobaltstarling! who hasn't played the games! but gets the vibes!) and would much rather lore discussions and analysis and commentary that way than in individual one-on-one messaging.

Which is to say, I would love to talk about the things! But would prefer it in the open.

Sorry!

[hollowdeath]

professor potter

pairing: harry james potter x fem!reader AU (18+)

summary: 2 years after the war, harry accepted a position as a substitute professor at hogwarts and recognized you from his years as a student. old feelings come to the surface as you both try to remain professional to keep his position safe.

content warning: slight teacher/student dynamic (they used to be classmates, reader is 18+), mostly slow burn & angst. smut mostly doesn't happen til the end (masturbation, penetration)

word count: 12.5k

a/n: wrote this for fun between working on requests! thank you to everyone who sends them in, they're so good and i'm excited to post more soon! just another fluffy, angsty harry fic taking place in school w a hint of smut...kinda similar to my last one but thats ok ! as always not exactly book/movie/canon accurate i apologize !

it's your first day of your last year at hogwarts, and you're probably the only student here that's not completely thrilled to be back. young witches and wizards running around you in the halls with their robes dragging on the ground, completely in awe with each other at the architecture and moving portraits.

you have to admit, if hogwarts does anything right, it's the ambience. probably the only thing you'll miss after leaving this year is the magic castle itself, particularly the library and your dorm room, which have been your sanctuaries for the past 7 years. there's just no place in the world, even the wizarding world, you've found, that quite compares to hogwarts.

but no, unfortunately, not even the grandiose castle of every young wizard's dream was enough to make you want to stay here even a day longer than you had to. and trust, you were counting down the days.

there was a lot that went into your disdain for the school. after the war in your 5th year, nothing had been the same. sure, the building was restored to its original form and even had some upgrades installed, but the energy within the walls felt so…unsettling.

it had been more than 2 and half years since then, and most students who remember the war well had either graduated or moved on from it. you, however, continued to feel the effects of it every day.

you've had a lot of personal struggles since then mentally, which affects your social life. you've overheard your friends talking about how they don't feel like you're the same person and you inevitably bring them down. it wasn't long after that they stopped talking to you completely. you didn't bother to rekindle the connection; you were ready to leave this place behind anyways, what was the point in faking a friendship for another year?

even without all that, you truly just hated your classes. you actually used to be a scholar student in your day, consistently making the top of the headmaster's list every year until the war. and you still loved headmaster mcgonagall, of course, you don't think that'd ever change, it was mainly the other professors that gave you a hard time. once you showed signs of struggling and burn out, it was like they just completely gave up on you and moved on to the next eager, bright-eyed bushy-tailed 1st year to dote on.

no matter, because again, you were ready to leave for a variety of reasons. even if you had loved your professors and graduated at the top of the class, you still had no friends to celebrate with. and even if you had those so-called "friends" back in your life, you still felt completely alone with them.

and so you laid in bed, the same bed you've had for 7 years now, retracting the ornate trim on the ceiling like you have a million nights before.

you decided to look back at your schedule once more, floating the paper out of its folder in your bag and towards your open hand. you read through it slowly, but nothing had changed. pretty much the worst line up of classes you've had so far. particularly your least anticipated course, defense against the dark arts.

at this point, you'd had more than enough when it came to the dark arts. those death eaters nearly killed you in that war, and actually did manage to kill too many of your classmates and teachers in the process. you saw your second home crumble in front of you, classrooms you grew up in completely leveled and the bridge burned to the ground, so much death and destruction over nothing but power. you resented the dark magic in this world.

sighing, you set the paper down on your bedside table and roll over, attempting to fall asleep. you have plenty of early classes this year and don't look forward to having to wake up with the sun to make it to them on time.

you're wasting time in the bathroom just before your defense against the dark arts, your last class of the day, when your peace is interrupted by a group of girls who come in giggling and talking rapidly amongst each other. from inside your stall you can't help but tune into their gossip. it's the only thing you could hear and, who cares, you could use some good drama.

you tried to dissect their conversation but they were constantly talking over each other, squealing, giggling, and you couldn't understand a thing. after a few moments of craning your neck towards the door to get a better listen, one girl's voice stood out amongst the rest as she asked, "okay, but, who's going to try and flirt with potter first?" her question was followed by many desperate "me!" "me!" "me!"s, a wave of giggling following.

potter. there's no way…

the bells begin ringing, signaling your next class is starting soon, and the girls go rushing out of the bathroom together. you slowly open the stall door and walk to the closest mirror. pale, like you've seen a ghost.

they couldn't possibly be talking about harry potter, right?

just his name had become plenty famous in its own right. the boy who lived; the boy who lived twice. you hadn't heard his name mentioned in a long time, though that's not hard when you've hardly interacted with anyone here in a long time.

you remembered harry from your years before the war that you had shared with him. he was 2 years ahead of you, so it wasn't often you had the chance to speak with him, but he was pretty much as legendary as one student could be at hogwarts. however, whenever you did manage to have a conversation with him, you always thought he was cute. really cute.

okay, so maybe you had a ginormous crush on him your entire time at hogwarts. but so did pretty much every other girl. but you didn't just think he was cute, you admired his gentle nature and timid personality. despite his heroic and outright dangerous adventures, he was always so kind, so humble…

the bells begin ringing again, meaning you're now late to class. "shit." you mutter, grabbing your bag and stumbling through the bathroom door.

you're jogging to your dark arts class with a racing mind, still wondering why those girls would mention potter's name so randomly.

you turn the corner and see the classroom door is already closed. "shit." you mutter again, stomping your foot. now you have to open the heavy doors and draw everyone's attention towards you, quite literally the last thing in the world you want right now.

sighing, you push open one of the doors, making the loudest noises you've ever heard echo throughout the silent classroom. you walk in and, as expected, all eyes are on you.

you grit your teeth and close the door behind you, making your way towards an empty seat in the middle of the room. the silence lingers as your footsteps hit the ground, trying your best not to make eye contact with anyone. you hear a few snickers and whispers coming from behind, and you can already tell it's your old friend group. you roll your eyes, sighing as you drop your weight into the creaky wooden seat.

you hadn't realized, but headmaster mcgonagall was at the front of the room. you noticed once she continued talking, looking up to see her smiling at you. you returned it. you love how she's always liked you despite your grades slipping lately.

you quickly look back down at your hands as people begin to turn away from you, drawing their attention back to mcgonagall as she continues to introduce the class.

"like i was saying, class, we apologize for the change this semester and hope you'll be understanding of us as we navigate this situation carefully. i suspect you'll all be respectful and courteous to our guest as he donates his time to hogwarts and to you, our students."

you look back up, a confused look on your face. what change? what situation? what guest?

it didn't take you long to connect the dots. it's like everything was in slow motion. the girls talking in the bathroom, the guest, the reason all the front rows of seats in class were completely filled with girls…

"please, class, welcome hogwarts' very own, mr. harry james potter."

all at once, your eyes landed on harry, who had been sitting to the side, obscured from your vision by several girls and a pillar. as he walks towards mcgonagall, eager applause erupt from the girls and the boys offer mediocre claps. you're too stunned to react, watching harry intently as he shakes mcgonagall's hand with that same timid smile.

you can hardly believe your eyes. what is going on? why is he here? and how the hell does he look even better now than he did 2 years ago?

"thank you, headmaster mcgonagall," harry says shyly, turning to the students. his eyes immediately fall on you. you try to convince yourself he's looking just in front of you or even past you, but you can feel his stare into your eyes. its the only thing that breaks you out of your shock.

you blink a few times and slump into your seat, feeling your blood run cold at harry's eye contact. he looks down at the desk he's standing at and shuffles a few papers. you sink even lower into your chair. this can't be good.

"uh, well, hello…everyone," harry says awkwardly, earning some flirtatious giggles from the girls just ahead of you. "it's a pleasure to be here, really, despite the circumstances. uh, i'm sure as some of you know…i've been very close with the weasley family for years and feel devastated for bill– uh, professor weasley, that is," harry corrects himself nervously, clearing his throat and glancing at his papers again.

"and when he reached out to me personally, specifically me out of anyone, to teach in his place for this semester, i couldn't say no to him. so, while it's a real honor to be here with you all, please know it's just for this semester and then professor weasley will be back to continue with the lesson plan in the spring," harry explains, looking around the room yet always letting his eyes land on you specifically with a lingering gaze.

harry goes into the schedule for the semester, the skills you'll be learning, and, well, you can't really focus on what else because you're just completely lost in your own head.

harry potter, the harry potter, is your professor for an entire semester.

you were completely dumbfounded. he couldn't hardly be older than 20 years old at this point. he had only left hogwarts just 2 years prior, yet he looked so different. though the glasses and hair stayed relatively the same, he had matured in the face. a slight beard, defined smile lines, and he'd definitely spent some time in the gym…

seeing him in a button up with his old gryffindor tie on drove you mad. is he really getting you worked up in the middle of class by just standing there? you feel like you're 14 again, staring him down in the courtyard from behind a tree.

it doesn't help that you swear he keeps looking at you. specifically you. his gaze is unmistakable at this point, it can't be a coincidence.

you try to stop yourself from having these thoughts and physical reactions. if he's going to be your professor for an entire semester you have to get over this silly crush that was never going to work out anyway. though you're soon turning 19, it makes no difference if he's working with the school, it would never be allowed…

what are you even saying? as if anything would ever happen except in your dreams. all you're going to do is lust for him until christmas and then he'll be gone again, his name nothing but a spoken legend again.

before you can process all he's said, harry announces that everyone's free to leave once you grab a textbook from him. girls are immediately standing up and running to get in line, and the boys are rolling their eyes as they sluggishly follow behind.

you're inevitably the last one, getting a headache as you listen to girls try to ask harry all kinds of questions for a bit of his attention. he mostly just gives simple answers or laughs them off, referring back to the class or the textbook he was handing them in some way to change the subject.

mcgonagall eventually shoos the girls away, which harry thanks her for in a low tone. he hands a book to each of the boys in front of you before it comes down to you. as the boy in front of you is being escorted away by mcgonagall, you briefly catch harry putting the library card of your book inside the front cover before he closes it.

your eyes connect as he hands the book to you, but he doesn't let go. your heart instantly flutters.

"it's nice to see you again, [y/n]," he says softly, letting the weight of the book fall in your hands.

the way he says your name has you frozen in place. his pretty blue eyes have stayed just as mesmerizing. it takes a moment before you're able to wrap the book in your arms, offering him a friendly smile as you softly reply, "you too, harry…"

you're quickly making your way back to your room with the biggest, cheesiest smile plastered on your face. he remembered you. you had barely ever interacted with harry, only a handful of times as far as you could remember, and you were sure he had completely forgotten about you, or at least forgotten your name. you tried to chalk it up to him having access to the attendance records of the class and reading over your name, but you still felt like a giddy school girl skipping along day dreaming about her crush.

when you got back to your dorm, you set the class textbook down on your desk and went to turn around before looking back at it longingly. harry had just put the library card back in the book before handing it off to you. you were most likely crazy, but something inside you was insanely curious to see if he had done something to the card.

you slowly opened the book and took the card out, a blank piece of cardstock except for a fresh label printed at the top. you sigh, almost putting it back before seeing something on the card catch the shimmer of the light.

you give the card a curious look. you turn it in your hands towards the light, trying to see what's on it. before giving up in frustration, a thought comes into your brain.

no…

you dig into your luggage, still unpacked from the day prior, looking for your old ink and quill. once you find them you come back to the card, setting it on your desk as you open the ink pot. you dip your quill in the ink and touch it to the spot you noticed earlier.

as you watched, the ink collected into letters and numbers, forming a message across the dotted lines of the check out columns. you were stunned. harry actually wrote to you in disappearing ink? you thought you were delusional thinking it was a possibility, but here was the proof plain as day:

[y/n],

hagrid's, 8:30pm

harry

you kept rereading the lines over and over before they slowly disappeared, fading away into the paper. you stood back in pure disbelief. what does this mean? obviously it means he wants to meet with you, but for the life of you you just can't figure out why. you two barely knew one another personally, it had been two years since you'd seen or heard of each other again, and now he's secretly inviting you to hagrid's after hours using disappearing ink? as your substitute professor, too…

from 5-8 pm you mainly paced around your room in both lingering disbelief and unbridled excitement. though you had no idea why harry had invited you out in secret, you were anxious just to be in his presence at his request.

you spent forever deciding on your outfit, feeling a bit silly for putting so much effort into this suspicious rendezvous that you were still clueless about.

sneaking out had become somewhat natural to you over the years. you knew all the blind spots of the castle and could hear a prefect coming from a mile away. you were out of your room and walking down to hagrid's completely unnoticed in less than 10 minutes.

on your way down the hill, your mind is racing with possibilities of what this meeting could entail.

arriving at hagrid's hut, you admire the warm glow of the windows and intoxicating smell coming from the smoking chimney – a mix of wood and garlic. hagrid's pumpkins are just beginning to plump up, his yard scattered with overgrown vines.

as you walk up to the door, a wave of anxiety hits you. knocking seems like the most impossible task in the world all of a sudden.

you steady your breathing, let your heart rate slow, and knock before you have the chance to stop yourself.

a few seconds of some rustling can be heard behind the door before it swings open. harry greets you with a warm smile. no longer dressed for class, harry looks quite adorable in a comfy sweater and baggy jeans standing before you in the hut.

"[y/n], you got my message," he says, clearly impressed. you couldn't believe this was real. he really did leave you that note on purpose. just hearing him acknowledge it made your heart race all over again.

"i-i did," you say in shock, searching his expression for an answer to all your questions. why are you here?

harry gestures for you to come in. "well, join me, please," he insists. you politely smile and enter the hut, the smell of food making your mouth water immediately. "smells amazing in here," you comment under your breath.

harry closes the door, looking back at you with a shy smile. "oh, thank you. it's for us, actually." he tells you, nodding his head towards the dining table.

completely set up with a tablecloth, harry has food plated for the two of you on the tiny table, along with tea still steaming on the stove.

"if you don't mind, of course," he checks with you, his voice soft and unsure. you look back at harry, barely able to grasp what's happening before you reply, "of course,"

he suppresses a grin as he gestures to the table once more. "please," he prompts you. you hand him your bag and jacket before taking your seat at the table, admiring the food he prepared for you. you're still lost in thought when harry asks, "tea?" holding the kettle from the stove.

"please, thank you," you reply. he pours you both cups of tea before bringing them to the table with a smile on his face.

as you're eating you notice a record playing in the corner you hadn't heard earlier. it fills the space nicely as you both take your first bites of dinner. "hope you like it, i wasn't sure what to make," he says nervously.

wiping your lips with a napkin, you simply tell him, "it's lovely,"

after another moment or so, harry sits back in his chair. "so…[y/n]..." he sighs. hearing him say your name like that makes your brain fuzzy for just a second before he speaks again. "you're probably, um, wondering why…"

you stifle a laugh at his stalling, getting a hint of confidence as you interrupt him. "wondering why professor potter secretly invited me to have a home cooked dinner with him?"

harry goes still, his eyes searching your expression as a blush grows over his cheeks. he swallows nervously, blinking and shaking his head before attempting to respond. "u-um, yeah, that,"

smirking, enjoying his nerves, you wait for his explanation with your arms crossed and a raised brow. he clears his throat and diverts his eyes from your gaze. he takes a sip of tea before smacking his lips and looking back at you.

"i just, i haven't seen you…" he starts, eyes softening at you. "i-i know we didn't talk much, but…i always cared for you." the last part was hard for harry to get out, a weight lifting off his shoulders in the process.

you were blushing, but more than that you were sweating. this is like something you would dream about as a kid. hell, even just earlier today…

"when i saw you today…in class…" he seemed uncomfortable referencing that. "i just…a lot of memories came back to me," his hands move with him nervously as he speaks.

he sighs and stands up, his body language clearly stressed. you haven't said a word, you simply can't. what could you possibly say?

harry's facing the fireplace, his head in his hands. "look, i just, now that i'm your professor this semester i just think…" he takes a moment to find the words before turning to you. "i had a crush on you. okay? there. god damn it," harry huffs angrily, rolling his head back as he throws his hands down.

"i had a crush on you for like 3 years, it was stupid, and i don't want it to affect my teaching with you. so…i guess i practically set up a fucking date to tell you this, sent hagrid away for the evening for nothing…" he gestures to the table, sighing in defeat.

you're stunned into silence, to say the least. there aren't words to describe what's going on in your head at this moment.

after a moment harry looks back at you, his gaze softening once again. "[y/n]...please understand i wouldn't be telling you any of this unless i thought there was another way i could deal with it. when i saw you today…it was like i was 16 again," a small smile creeps onto his face before he wipes it away.

"and if i didn't tell you now, it's all i would've thought about when i saw you, so…yeah. there." harry says with a huff, avoiding eye contact with you.

before you can even process what's going on, your body reacts for you. you stand up, walking over to harry, getting his attention off the floor. he looks at you almost with fear in his eyes at how close you are. you sigh shakily before speaking.

"harry…u-um, professor potter…" you correct yourself. "please, just, harry…for now at least," harry insisted, his eyes apologetic.

"harry…" you say, suppressing a grin. "you don't have to worry. really…um, it was definitely mutual, to put it lightly…"

harry gives you a surprised look. "really?"

you roll your eyes, taking a step away from him and towards the fire, enjoying the warmth. "harry, you forget who you are sometimes. essentially every girl i knew had a crush on you at one point."

harry's a little flustered at this statement, also taking a step closer to the fire, and towards you. "i-i wouldn't say that, i was definitely not that lucky back in the day," he jokes.

"so those girls that were practically all over you during class today…?" you tease him. "'oh, professor potter, what can i do to get a good grade?'" you mock their voices, giving him puppy dog eyes as you lean towards him before laughing and turning towards the fire. "is that not luck?" you ask with your arms crossed, a smirk hiding your slight jealousy.

harry's silent for a few moments before you look over at him. you see his eyes dark and fixated on you for just a second before he blinks and shakes his head at you, also turning to the fire. "please. they're children. they crush on any slightly older guy they see."

you roll your eyes again at his denial. "some of them were my age, well on their way to being 19. but, whatever you say."

the fire crackles in front of you two, filling the space and creating a warm glow. "besides…none of them are you." harry says. you look over at him, and he's lost staring at the fire. he feels you looking at him and quickly corrects himself. "i mean, nobody was like you, at least to me, back then…" he trails off awkwardly, wincing at his own choice of words.

you adore his nervous antics. he's just the same sweet, timid boy you remember, except he's a bit taller with a 5 o'clock shadow and looks gorgeous in the glow of a fireplace right now.

"i've really mucked this night up, haven't i? i was supposed to tell you about the crush calmly and professionally, with no inappropriate comments, and send you on your way into the night with your first reading in the textbook…" harry sighs, giving you a pathetic look.

"well…" you start. "your first mistake was probably leaving me a secret note, and cooking me a wonderful dinner," you gesture towards the table. harry lets out a pathetic laugh, shaking his head. "yeah, probably."

you don't know why you feel the need to, but you instinctively grab for harry's hand. he gives you a surprised, scared look.

you try to reassure him with a soft smile. "harry, i appreciate you telling me. i hope it can make this semester easier for you."

harry smiles in return, but it's not genuine. he looks like he's holding back from letting you know how he really feels.

regardless, he invited you two to finish up your food, laughing as you both attempted to resume casual conversation without the awkward air.

surprisingly, the two of you naturally begin to talk up a storm, reminiscing on memories and catching up on what's happened since then. harry tells you about his career as an auror and his experiences that lead him to being able to teach defense against the dark arts. when professor weasley's wife had died of sudden illness, the only person he wanted to take his place was harry.

you're hesitant to tell him about your lack of eventful news, practically hiding your face in embarrassment as you admit that your grades have been suffering since the war.

harry put a reassuring hand on your knee, his chair pushed closer to you. you had both long since finished dinner and just talked, enjoying the fire as harry continued to feed it wood every so often.

you looked up at him, melting at how adorable his tired eyes looked through his glasses. "i get it. trust me." he tells you. his voice puts you at ease, and you don't feel quite as embarrassed as before.

"maybe this semester i could help you. if you'd like, of course," harry offers. you smile. "of course."

as you're slowly making your way towards the door to leave, harry watches you search through your bag to find chapstick. as you're putting it on, he continues to watch you. you sneak a glance at him, his face soft and full of admiration.

"you know, if i may say, in the least inappropriate manner possible…" he says with a laugh, causing you to laugh with him. "you have truly only gotten more beautiful after all this time, [y/n]."

looking over at him, you can feel your face form a cheesy grin with blushing cheeks. "well, thank you, that's very kind," you say, putting your chapstick away and taking another step towards the door. "but, really, i should be saying the same about you."

harry waves you away, but you notice the smile planted on his cheeks. "please," he says sarcastically.

he reaches for the door to open it for you, and finds himself rather close to you by accident. you smile up at him, and he nervously steps back.

"u-uh, thank you for coming tonight, really, even if it was a bit weird…" harry says, an embarrassed laugh following. giggling with him, you take a step outside. "it was nice. but, no more invisible ink. just ask me from now on, okay?" you ask, still giggling at him.

harry shakes his head at himself. "will do."

you give him a warm smile before reaching in for a one-arm hug, resting your head on harry's shoulder for just a second before pulling back. "i'll see you tomorrow, professor potter." 

enjoying the shocked and flustered look on his face, you walk away still laughing, making your way up the hill and towards the castle. you heard the door shut behind you quickly after you left, but could feel harry's lingering eyes following you through the window the entire way back.

that night you're laying in bed trying to convince yourself everything that just happened wasn't a dream. if it weren't for your full stomach and muddy shoes sitting by your door you might've convinced yourself it really was all an illusion. rather than dreading the next day of classes, you're actually excited to wake up as it only means you'll see harry sooner.

though you're not sure exactly why. yes you'd had a friendly conversation with him tonight after he admitted his feelings towards you, which still hasn't quite settled in yet…but what happens now? he's still your professor for the next 5 months minimum, and you both know you used to like each other. harry might feel better getting it off his chest, but you were perfectly fine keeping that secret to yourself like you always had. if anything, now it's the only thing you're going to think about every day.

rolling over, you try to fall asleep without thinking about harry too much.

it had been a few weeks since you met with harry that night in hagrid's hut, and things were going…okay, so far.

well, to be completely honest, you had utterly fallen back into your crush on harry harder than you ever had before.

and you tried to stop yourself this time. really, you did. working with harry in class and then stopping by his office at least 3 times a week for his help in other classes was a lot of time to be spending with a professor, and you rather despised just how fast harry made your heart beat or how easily his eyes could distract you.

so you tried your best to convince yourself it was lingering feelings from your past self, even trying to have a crush on other boys in your year to distract your brain. that failed miserably. none of those boys were attractive or interesting on their own, especially in comparison to professor potter…

but you couldn't fool yourself. you still felt the same butterflies seeing harry now like you did in 5th year. when he's talking to you in the quiet of his office, reading your textbook to you, you feel like the only two people in the world. when he fixes your hands to hold the wand properly, or moves your arm for you in the correct pattern to cast a spell, you can't focus for the rest of class. if his eyes linger on you just a bit too long during one of his lectures, a knowing smile growing on his face, you melt in your seat.

there was no denying it. you liked him more now than you ever had before. maybe it's just the sheer amount of time you've spent with him this past month or so, but your feelings for him had never been this strong in the past. there were days where he was quite literally the only thing you thought about, or at least wanted to think about. though you were doing better in your other classes, it was only because of him. you spent barely any outside time putting effort into these classes because, ultimately, you were completely distracted by harry.

and not just the idea of him, but particularly the growing tension you had noticed between you two recently.

you also tried to convince yourself that this was going on in your head. but there were just too many instances of prolonged eye contact, harry sitting a bit too close to you during your tutoring sessions, and lingering hands on your skin that made you question if harry maybe wasn't entirely over his crush either…

not that you tried to make it easy for him. since the semester started, you've been taking some extra time each morning to perfect your hair/makeup, put on your favorite perfumes on days you knew you'd be close to harry, and would even change your outfit completely when going to study with him outside of your school robes to give you a boost of confidence.

not that you needed the boost. lately you could only feel confident in yourself and nothing less. something about learning your life long crush who seemed so unattainable also had feelings for you, and could possibly still, made you feel untouchable. not to mention that any girl you heard talk about him or swoon over him in class just made you laugh to yourself; they had no idea you were with him alone for hours every week goofing off together as he attempted to help you study.

this confidence made its way into other parts of your day outside of harry as well. you were talking more in class, making a few new friends, even going to parties and outings just for the fun of it. you were actually enjoying your time at hogwarts instead of dreading every day. not all because of harry, but it definitely didn't hurt to consider him a friend.

a friend. a professor. an old classmate. a crush. a temporary fixation. your relationship to harry, in your mind, seemed so complicated and sometimes incredibly frustrating. especially when he seemed to flirt with you so subtly. you couldn't stand the, 'is he, isn't he' thoughts. but, at the same time, it just made you more motivated to push the limits to see how he responded.

of course it started with looking good, enjoying his reaction seeing you each day with a small smile and blushing cheeks. then it was making flirtatious jokes and purposefully giving him innocent looks while he rambled about whatever subject to get him flustered and distracted. and, lately, you've stepped it up by wearing shorter and shorter skirts whenever you stop by his office, and have even caught him looking at your legs a number of times when he thinks you're not paying attention.

all this to say, there was definitely tension.

you had to admit you felt a bit guilty, you knew harry valued his position as a substitute professor and was enjoying his time there, and you would feel awful if anything ever happened to cost him this position. he told you about his crush specifically to alleviate it, and your only goal this semester has been to do the opposite.

but, at the same time, you wouldn't act this way if harry didn't also create tension between you two. he also made overtly flirty jokes and comments, even seeming a tad bit jealous whenever you mentioned another boy during your time together. and you weren't stupid, you could tell when he wore the cologne you complimented one time when you were around or had even changed from his school clothes before you came to see him. there was definitely something unspoken going on between the two of you, but you were both afraid of crossing that line and making things complicated. besides, if anything, you both seemed to enjoy this game you were playing of teasing each other in private and then acting normally during class as student and teacher.

honestly, you found it to be insanely erotic, and were more turned on in class than any other time you were with harry due to the secretive nature of everything. his longing gaze as you walk in, his nervous glances towards specifically you, the shift in his voice from talking to one student to talking to you, it was all so subtle yet in plain view. something about wanting what you can't have only made you want it more.

on this particular day, you had been with harry for over two hours studying for an exam for a class you had been struggling with all semester, even with harry's help. you were frustrated, laying your head in your arms with your textbook in front of you, groaning as harry chuckled at you. 

"c'mon, [y/n], you've got this. i mean, you did just fine on this last practice test, better than you have all semester really," harry comments, pulling the paper out of your folder. you lift your head up, giving him a mean look. "i got a 75. barely." you deadpan.

"yes, and that's better than what you have been getting." harry stated, trying to hide a smirk. you throw a crumpled up paper at him. "stop, that's not funny," you whine, also trying to hide your laugh.

chuckling, harry stands up and walks towards the bookshelf in his office. "look, i'm just trying to be encouraging here," he says over his shoulder as he scans the rows of books.

you try to get back to your work, but you're just so utterly confused and upset that you close the book with a huff and lean back in your seat with an exasperated expression. harry hears this and turns to you, giving you a sympathetic smile.

he walks back over, picking up the book in front of you and setting it in your bag. "here, we can be done for today. it's not good to push yourself past your limit."

you sigh as you push back the urge to tear up. "sometimes i just feel so stupid," you say in a soft, despondent voice, staring off into the window across from harry's desk.

harry's watching you intently, and nearly drops to his knees as he crouches beside your chair and catches your eyes in his. "hey, you're not stupid. quite the opposite, actually." he says with a genuine voice. you look away, still not believing him.

"really, [y/n], and i'm not saying this as your professor. back in school i was constantly listening to hermione go on and on about your intelligence and class rank. she was incredibly impressed and slightly envious that someone 2 years below her was actually providing some competition at this school." harry says with a laugh.

you can't help but blush like crazy at this confession. hermione had been your academic inspiration for all of your time at hogwarts, and even still now despite your declining lack of effort. you'd had quite a few conversations with her in the past about classes and certain books or authors you both enjoyed, but had no idea she thought that highly of you.

mulling over this information in your head, harry continued to grab your attention with a soft smile and loving eyes. "you're not stupid. different things are harder for different people. you'll get there, and i'll help you. okay?" he asks.

you smile back at him. "okay."

slowly packing up to leave, you and harry both take your time to gather your supplies as you chat about your respective plans for the weekend. you casually mention a party you were thinking of going to. harry perks up at this. "a party?" he asks, a twinge of concern laced in his voice.

you give him a look. "yeah, ever heard of it?" you ask sarcastically, laughing to yourself. "i guess it's one of the slytherin boys' birthdays, or something like that," you wave off, throwing your bag over your shoulder. "apparently it's going to be massive,"

harry continues looking at you with a hint of concern. "well, just…be safe, yeah?" harry comments, his voice uneasy. you laugh at him again, looking at him incredulously. "yes, professor potter, i'll be careful," you tease him. you know harry gets a little squirmy when you call him that outside of class, and it never fails to make you feel powerful.

"besides, i heard the theme is dress to impress, so you already know i'm gonna look so good," you joke, flipping your hair dramatically. harry's tenseness breaks, letting out a chuckle. "well, still. just…be safe." is all he manages to say as you walk with him to the door.

saying your goodbyes as you separate down the hall, you can still feel harry's eyes on you until you disappear around the corner.

the night of the party, you were still unsure if you wanted to go. when a couple girls from class saw you and asked if you were going, they ended up convincing you to come with them. so, you got changed into a flashy dress that fit you well, fixed up your hair and makeup a bit, and met them in the courtyard to walk to the slytherin common room together. they obsessively commented on your outfit, telling you just how good you looked and letting you know you'd have no problem finding a guy to snog tonight.

but, you don't want any guy tonight. if anything, you were walking slowly through the hallways hoping by some chance that harry would cross your path and see just how good you looked. but you knew you weren't that lucky.

upon arriving at the party, drinks are immediately pushed into your and your friends' hands. they were right about the party being massive, as every square foot of the slytherin common room was packed with slightly tipsy students of all ages dancing to the loud music. you had barely finished your first drink before your friends dragged you over to do shots with them, wincing at the burn it left in your throat afterwards.

as the night goes on, you're eventually separated from all the girls you came with. not on purpose, some of them were playing drinking games, some were dancing, and one had even left the party with a guy she was completely into. no hard feelings, everyone was just doing their own thing. you had a few shouting-over-the-music conversations with a couple classmates and drank another cup of the mysterious alcoholic punch being served before deciding to head back to your room. you informed one of your friends, who asked if you wanted her to come with you, but you insisted she stay.

entering the hallway is extremely sobering. the loud music and colorful lights made it easy to ignore the growing drunken sensation, but you were now nervously navigating the halls of hogwarts, slightly intoxicated, attempting to warm yourself up with your hands over your arms. you hadn't even thought to bring a jacket, of course, so you were shivering as you made your way back to your room.

not long after leaving the party, you turn the corner and come face to face with another person. a boy a year under you, though you couldn't remember his name or anything else about him. you're a bit startled, not expecting to see anyone else, but politely apologize and attempt to walk around him.

"hey. you were at the party, right?" he asks, stepping in front of you to prevent you from leaving. you're slightly annoyed by him already, but your intoxicated state makes you bite your tongue. "yeah, just on my way back to my room," you try to end the conversation there, taking another step to get around him.

but he gets in your way again, stepping even closer to you this time. "what's the rush? y'know you had every guy talkin' in there tonight? sure would be nice to take home the prize," he slurs into your face, your nose scrunching at his alcoholic breath. god, this kid's way more wasted than you.

"excuse me?" you scoff, turning your face away from him. he tries to put his hand on your waist but you slap it away as hard as you can, causing him to wince and give you an angry look. "i suggest you leave me the fuck alone," you announce firmly, stancing your feet apart as you get ready to defend yourself further.

just as this guy's about to try again, this time his hands going for your neck, a voice from down the hall echoes loudly, scaring you both. "hey!"

you both turn, and it's harry.

"i would further suggest you leave her alone, mr. williams," he announces as he swiftly walks towards you. the kid laughs him off. "mind your business, huh, potter? this doesn't involve you," he continues to slur, looking like he wants to fight as harry walks up to him, chest to chest.

"it does now. leave and you'll be lucky i don't have you expelled or rather arrested for sexually assaulting a fellow student on campus grounds after hours, while intoxicated might i add," harry spits at him, his eyes full of disgust and rage.

the kid falters a bit, but the alcohol still has him acting cocky, getting in harry's face. "yeah? or what," he asks daringly.

you get between them and put your wand, hidden in your dress, against the kid's throat, making him stiff with wide eyes. "touch him and i will gladly get expelled for hurting you in ways you couldn't even conceive of in your fucking nightmares. do you understand? get the fuck out of here!" you nearly shout at the kid, causing him to turn and run.

you sigh a breath of relief, but quickly begin to feel the anxiety return as you bring your wand down and look at harry.

you can feel your body shaking with anger and fear, and also shivering from how cold you hadn't realized you'd gotten. your cheeks were flushed, your breathing uneven, and nearly on the verge of tears. harry's eyes were still angry, but he gave you a sympathetic look. he promptly took off his jacket and wrapped it around your shivering frame, enveloping you in a hug in the process. it's hard not to let the tears flow just a bit as you rest your head in his chest. you felt so vulnerable with him in that moment.

"here, let's get you back to your room, yeah?" harry says softly, turning your shoulders and guiding you down the hall. you realize you had sobered up during the ordeal, your eyes focusing and walking straightening out as you follow the corridors. once harry begins guiding you down your hallway, you slow to look up at him with a curious expression.

"how do you know where my room is?"

harry's a bit stunned by your question, searching for an answer before you began to think more. "and, wait," you stop walking and turn to him. "how did you even find me?" you ask breathlessly. harry continues to look guilty as he searches for an answer. smirking, you pull his jacket on you closer.

"professor potter, if i didn't know better, i'd say you were watching me tonight," you tease him in a flirty voice. "surely that's not the case, is it?"

harry looks around you two nervously, clearly starting to feel anxious for his actions. all you could do was smirk. you knew he still liked you.

harry sighs, avoiding your eye contact with a completely red face. "look, i just had a bad feeling about that party, okay?" he says simply. you continue to stare at him with a knowing look. "i couldn't sleep tonight knowing something could've happened to you. something like that fucking kid…" harry gets worked up just thinking about it again before stopping himself and calming down. "i'm sorry. it was wrong of me, and completely inappropriate."

your smirk drops into a soft smile. you can't help but feel your stomach erupt into butterflies hearing him admit he was watching you tonight specifically to make sure you were safe.

you softly put your hand to his cheek, causing him to look at you. he looks apologetic, concerned, and sad, his eyes searching yours as he slightly leans into your touch.

"thank you, harry." you say just above a whisper, your voice genuine and loving.

he sighs again, a bit relieved, a bit sad. his hand goes for yours, holding it for just a moment before he gives it back to you, letting go as he looks towards your door.

"well," he starts off, his voice cracking. "i'll leave you here for the night,"

smiling, you nod and take a step towards your door. you slip his jacket off of you and hand it back to him with a grateful, warm smile. he returns the smile as you're opening your door and waving goodbye at him.

as you're getting ready for bed, you replay the events of tonight over and over. you imagine harry watching you leave your room without you having any clue, meeting up with your friends, leaving the party in a daze, attempting to escape that guy before harry decided he had to step in and protect you.

you felt a bit silly for ever thinking harry's crush on you had stopped. even his subtle clues weren't very subtle thinking back now. maybe back in year 5 you assumed you were crazy for thinking he was looking at you funny, but now, nearing 3 years later, and learning he's liked you the whole time, you couldn't deny his longing gaze.

laying in bed, you decided you had to properly thank harry in some way for tonight, and you knew exactly how.

the next day, you paid a special visit to diagon alley with a friend to buy something special for harry. when she asked why you would ever possibly buy something like that for yourself, you make up some story about needing it for a class. she doesn't believe you, but goes along with it anyway and continues to have fun with you on your sunday out shopping.

you head towards his office in the afternoon when he usually spends his time grading assignments and working on the following week's lesson plan. you practically had his schedule memorized after coming to study with him so often.

softly knocking on the door, harry lets out a, "come in,"

you enter the office and he smiles at you immediately before it falters, his eyes then landing on the wrapped box in your hands. "surprise," you say with a shy voice.

he lets out a huff, looking back at you with a disbelieving expression. "[y/n]..." he carries off.

"it's just a little something," you say as you walk towards his desk, setting it down carefully in front of him. "a thank you, for last night," you tell him.

his eyes move back and forth from the box to your eyes, not knowing what to say. a few moments pass before he stands. "[y/n], i can't accept this…" he sighs. "what i did last night, i mean…it shouldn't have happened that way," he says curtly.

you tilt your head to catch his gaze, giving him a warm smile. "you did nothing wrong," you reassure him. you gesture to the gift. "please," you insist.

harry's shoulders relax, giving you an embarrassed smile as he slides the box closer to him, admiring the wrapping. "this is gorgeous, did you do this?" he asks, pointing at the sparkly ribbon and personalized name card. you proudly smile and nod your head.

harry admires it for another moment before carefully untying the ribbon and lifting the lid off the box. he gasps at what he sees.

a signed, hardcover, gold leaf detailed first edition defense against the dark arts textbook from his favorite auror. he had talked to you about seeing it at the bookshop but not wanting to spend the money or not having the place to display it or whatever his excuse was. you had taken note of this comment and when you saw it wasn't as expensive as harry had made it seem you knew it was perfect.

"[y/n]...you didn't…" he utters, practically falling back in his chair as he continues to stare at the cover. you giggle fondly at his reaction. "go ahead, open it up," you tell him excitedly. he can hardly move, but he eventually takes the book out of the box and admires it in his hands. he flips the cover open, sees the signature, and smiles. then, he looks at the inside of the cover and his expression drops.

"i had it personalized, if that's okay with you," you ask anxiously. on the inside of the leather bound cover you had a pressing engraved that said 'harry james potter'.

harry's in shock, his fingers running across the pressing softly. "[y/n], this is…" he trails off, continuing to admire the book as he flips through it, landing back on the inside cover, admiring his name once more.

"thank you." harry says, looking at you with so much love in his eyes it makes your heart burst. it was worth every penny seeing him in awe in front of you like this.

"well, thank you," you respond, smiling, holding your arms behind your back.

harry abruptly stands up, stepping around his desk and pulling you in for a desperate hug. you're a bit surprised, your arms wrapping around his waist as he continues to pull you closer and closer.

after a minute or so of the most comforting hug you've experienced outside of last night in that hallway, harry separates from you only slightly to look down at you. your faces are close enough to feel the breath of the other person.

you just want to tell him, 'fuck it, who cares, nobody's here, just kiss me, please, release this tension', but before you can even consider it, harry breaks the silence.

"i still love you," he says so softly, his face wincing as the words fall from his lips. your breath hitches. love?

"fuck," harry mutters, almost stepping away from you until you pull him closer to you, putting your lips close enough to his they're nearly touching. "please. kiss me. just kiss me. please." you practically beg, your hand finding its way to harry's neck.

"[y/n], we can't, i can't–" "just once, please, maybe it'll stop if we just, please…" you interrupt him, hoping he understands what you're implying, your noses rubbing together.

harry takes a few moments before practically whimpering as he connects your lips to his, wrapping you in his arms tightly. you immediately melt into him, letting the kiss consume you as your hands pull harry closer to you.

it only takes a few seconds before harry has you up on his desk, his hands gripping your ass under your skirt. the cold of the wood on your exposed skin makes you gasp, and harry's tongue quickly slips past your lips.

it's everything you imagined, and the fact that this is happening in his office is just making you even more turned on. you had played this scenario in your head so many times, and it hardly felt real once it was actually happening. and on the desk you spent so many hours at, pining over him and fantasizing him taking you like he is right now.

after a few minutes of making out and needy groping through your clothes, harry pulls away breathlessly. opening your eyes you see he's completely flushed, his hair slightly messy as he nervously takes his hands off you.

you awkwardly clear your throat, your hands falling to your sides and resting back on the desk. harry takes a step away, straightening his tie and fixing his hair. you hop off his desk and adjust your skirt.

the silence between you is awkward, but there's just nothing to say. the kiss only left you wanting more, of course, it was pointless to ever hope it would quell your feelings in some way.

"well," harry begins, his voice shaky and quiet. "that didn't work."

you let out a nervous laugh, coughing to cover it up. "yeah…sorry." you mumble.

harry sighs. "no, i'm sorry. i'm technically your superior, i shouldn't be doing this to you. leading you on, flirting with you, for fuck's sake, following you around after hours…"

you shake your head. "look, i'm not kissing professor potter, okay? i like you, harry. i've liked you since i was 13. i don't want to ruin your position here either, and i'll stop if that's what you truly want…" you choke up just a bit before swallowing it back. "but, just, please, stop blaming yourself. i want this, too."

the silence returns, harry clearly thinking over what you said as his eyes stare off beside you. you're anxiously shifting your weight, watching his face get lost in his own thoughts.

"i can't risk this job," harry says finally. "i don't give a shit about the money, pay me everything in the world i would still want you…" he mumbles. you feel your stomach drop at this sentiment. you want him so, so badly. but… 

"but…" harry says.

you smile at him sadly, knowing what's coming. "i can't let down bill, or mcgonagall, or any professors or students here who may actually still like me," he says with a dry laugh. "if we ever got caught, and i just know we would, and what would happen to you…i just–" "i know, harry," you interrupt him, taking a small step towards him.

he smiles at you sadly as well. "and i agree. it's not worth it. well, you're worth it, of course…" you say shyly, diverting your gaze before continuing. "but, it's too risky. you deserve to finish out this semester without that hanging over your head, y'know?"

harry stares at you lovingly, no attempt to hide his adoration for you in this moment. "you're truly incredible. you know that?" harry comments softly.

you respond by blushing and crossing your arms. he hums softly, his smile taking over his cheeks. "thank you, really, for everything, if things were any different, i wish…" harry stumbles. you smile at him again. "i know."

harry returns to his gift, admiring the book in his hands over and over before putting it on the bookshelf next to his desk. he admires it there for a while as well before thanking you again.

as you're getting ready to leave, harry stops you for a moment. "if you don't mind, i'd still love to help you in your other classes. and, just, remain friendly in general still, if possible…"

you melt again at his soft demeanor. harry's such a sweetheart it's heartbreaking. all you want is to kiss him again. it's all you've wanted since he stopped.

"of course."

it's the end of the semester, and you have mixed feelings about it. on one hand you're dying for a break from classes. you've done the best you have in years this semester, and it's exhausted you. but you're incredibly grateful, for a lot of things. your new friends, your rediscovered love for hogwarts and magic in general, your overall improved attitude and mentality.

with special thanks to a certain substitute professor…

harry. this semester was definitely a rollercoaster for you when it came to harry. though, towards the end, things fell into place a bit more as you both accepted and embraced your odd, yet effective routine. professional student-professor relationship in public; smitten, teasingly love-sick old classmates in the comfort of his office walls. nothing further than lingering hands, loving stares, and the occasional compliment towing the line of what's inappropriate and what isn't.

though the dynamic wasn't ideal, you grew to love it for what it was. a simple, longing love that wasn't exactly unspoken anymore, but sure felt like it each passing day as you both pretended that kiss never happened.

that kiss. you swear you think about it every day. you long for harry to grab you like that again, to slip his tongue past your lips again…sometimes, late at night, it's all you can think about. sometimes just the thought of it makes you need to touch yourself, remembering how desperate he was for you, the feeling of his lips on yours, sitting on his desk in his office, just the image of it from outside of your own perspective could bring you to your orgasm alone in your room.

to say you were anxiously counting down the days until classes were over and harry technically wasn't employed with hogwarts anymore was an understatement. though you hadn't spoken about it with him, you felt it was okay to maybe consider that he would want to continue things further with you once his substitution was over. you kept your guard up as you knew he could still be uncomfortable with it while you were a student in general. but a large portion of you was practically praying that wasn't the case. you physically couldn't resist him much longer.

you were staying on campus for christmas this year, mostly just to savor your last holiday here, but also to continue seeing harry if possible.

it was the last day of classes, and you learned you passed all your exams with flying colors. you showed up to dark arts class early to inform harry excitedly, and he congratulated you with the same level of excitement.

"i knew you could do it! i told you you were smart." he beams. "i am so, so proud of you, [y/n]."

you want to hug him so badly, he's helped you so much this semester, you wouldn't have cared enough to try and get these kinds of grades without his guidance. but it's too public, and the risk is too high, so you just settle on an awkward high five and laugh emptily.

as other students walk in, you both pretend the moment never happened, and you sit in your seat without looking up from the floor.

the class is simple and rather uneventful as it's mostly everyone's last class of the semester. harry actually hands out christmas cookies hagrid made for everyone, and they're mediocre in taste, but the designs are so adorable you can't resist finishing it.

harry gives you all a speech thanking the class for trusting him to teach this semester, and for being respectful of him and professor weasley's lessons. he talks about how he's always thought about being a professor, but actually ended up despising the paperwork, and just missed his old job, which caused the class to chuckle with him.

he dismissed everyone with a happy christmas, specifically towards you, of course.

your heart aches a little as you leave the classroom and head to your room. you're going to miss harry as a professor, even if it caused complications in other aspects, it was inspiring to see him be so intelligent, helpful, and supportive in class. of course you were biased, you always found him to be amazing, but something about watching him teach a young wizard how to do a spell correctly for the first time just made you admire him so deeply.

you decided to rest for the night, knowing harry would be here for at least another day to collect all his items and clean the classroom up for professor weasley. you could talk to him then, what exactly about you weren't sure just yet, but you knew you had to tie up these loose ends before they drove you mad.

the next afternoon, you're practically one of the only students roaming the halls. most everyone leaves the first day of break to go home, and by christmas there's only a handful of students left.

arriving at harry's office door, you admire it one last time. your little sanctuary away from the world.

you knock, but to your dismay, there's no answer.

you knock again, a bit louder, but still, nothing. you decide to peak in, and notice how barren the desk looks from afar.

fuck. there's no way harry's left without speaking to you first.

you quickly walk to the dark arts classroom just down the hall, hoping he's cleaning and organizing it, but find it empty and dark. your heart sinks. he's gone.

you slowly walk back to your room, deciding you'll grab your coat and visit hagrid to see if harry's with him there. you try not to let your disappointment overcome you, there's still a chance you could talk to him…

entering your room, you immediately head for your coat rack by the window. you start to slip it on when you hear your door close, knowing you left it open on purpose to quickly leave.

you turn around, and it's harry.

you gasp, immediately dropping the coat and running to him, jumping into a hug. he laughs at your reaction, but embraces you nonetheless.

"hi, love," he says softly, resting his head on top of yours. you could hardly contain yourself at the pet name. it communicated so much to you with so little effort.

you look up at him, barely able to believe what's happening. harry looks at you knowingly. this unspoken tension. it was going to be the death of you.

as harry begins leaning in, you crash your lips together with his, immediately engulfing him into a heated, wanting, needing kiss.

harry's more than happy to give in to you. it's clear he's thought about this just as much as you have. he finished all his professor duties as soon as he could so he could officially, finally, be yours.

you guide harry to your bed, pushing him onto it as he gives you an impressed look, clearly intrigued by your repressed desperation.

you crawl onto his lap, immediately pulling him back into the kiss. harry's hands are all over you, finally, after fantasizing about it every night in this very same bed for months.

the kiss is desperate, full of moaning and getting sloppier by the minute. harry's squeezing and slapping your ass so hard you whimper in his arms, your hands gripping his button up tightly.

"fuck, [y/n], need you so bad, please," harry moans into your kiss, his hands sliding up your back. you reach to take your shirt off, left in just a bra and tiny skirt, as you start untying his tie and unbuttoning his shirt.

harry's staring at you with hunger in his eyes. "do you even understand how badly i've wanted you? you and these fucking skirts, you must think i'm stupid." he growls, pulling at the hem of your skirt. you blush and stifle a giggle, overwhelmed with how insanely hot you found this to be.

"think that's funny? you think it was funny when i had to stand in class all day and not stare at your perfect legs through your robe? anytime i gave a lecture and just looking at you turned you into a needy slut," harry grabs your hair, turning your attention to him as he unbuttons the rest of his shirt with his other hand. "was that fun for you, hm? did you enjoy teasing me all semester?"

you can't say anything. all you can do is nod. you were so turned on you could hardly think straight.

"i bet it was," he says, examining your desperate expression, his words dripping with desire.

he pulls you in for another kiss, and you help him take off his shirt. his skin was warm, soft, and his shoulders were broad. you moved your lips to his neck, leaving an obvious bite just below his collar to finally mark what was yours.

harry groans, his hands reaching behind your back to swiftly undo your bra. he helps pull it off of you, marveling at your chest. "beautiful," he tells you before attaching his lips to your skin. you hold his head against you, savoring the feeling and sight of harry leaving hickeys along the soft skin of your boobs.

his hand cups one softly as his tongue circles your nipple, watching you through his glasses as you melt into his hands. "harry…" you moan, your hand running through his soft hair.

he continues, starting to suck on your nipple softly with closed eyes, his other hand pulling up your skirt to feel your wetness through your panties.

you immediately whimper and lean into harry's touch, desperate for this for so long. "f-fuck," you stutter breathlessly.

harry smiles, taking his lips off of you to look up at your blushing face. "so wet already," he smirks.

you cover his face with your hands, embarrassed, giggling, continuing to further lean into his hand for pleasure.

he laughs and removes your hands, his eyes full of lust just looking at you in his lap.

"i need you, now," he insists, pushing you further onto his growing erection through his slacks. you let out a breathy moan feeling just how hard he is already. he's just as desperate as you've been for him.

"is that okay?" he asks carefully, watching for your reaction. you laugh a bit. "please. i've waited long enough." you joke.

you help harry take his pants and boxers off, as well as your skirt and panties, leaving you both naked in your room.

he sat back down on the bed, and invited you into his lap again. "just like this is perfect," he says, guiding your hips and admiring your body as you sit with his cock between you two, your eyes barely able to look away from it.

harry pulls you in for a kiss, his hands traveling over your body and stopping at your pussy again, his hand feeling just how wet you are. he moans into your kiss along with you and begins to slip his fingers inside of you, slowly, letting you react to him.

harry pushes further and further into you until you're practically riding his hand, your kiss barely kept together with you bouncing, desperate for more. "please," you insist, your hand gently grasping for his precum soaked cock.

harry smiles, gently pulling his fingers away before letting you guide yourself onto him. slowly at first, you enjoy the feeling of harry's cock stretching you open, whimpering as he watches you intently, his hands supporting your hips. eventually you feel yourself take him completely, your hips flush with his as you start to slowly grind your hips up and down.

harry's a mess, barely able to hold himself together just watching you adjust to his cock. your face twisting in pleasure, your soft whimpers, the tight feeling of your pussy squeezing around him, it was almost too much already.

"fuck, baby," harry's moaning, his hands gripping your hips for sanity. you can't help but giggle, you just love seeing him like this for you after dreaming about it for so long. he's so lost in pleasure already, his jaw slack and eyes dropping.

"i-i'm already, fuck [y/n], you're just so," harry can barely get the words out. hearing him moan your name so filthily motivated you to move your hips quicker, letting your tits bounce in his face as you continued to pick up speed.

"fuck, fuck, fuck," harry's panicking, you can tell he's already trying to hold back his orgasm. you find it extremely hot just how quickly you can bring him to this point. so hot it brings you closer to your orgasm with him, putting your hands on his face to look up at you.

"you feel so fucking good, harry," you tell him, your head rolling back in pleasure. he's in awe of you, his eyes memorizing every single inch of you as you continue to ride him.

"please, please, can you, um…" he takes a second between his words to moan. "please, can you call me professor potter…" he asks, clearly embarrassed by the request.

you rub his blushing cheeks between your hands, his question only making you more turned on. you loved knowing he was just as into the teacher/student dynamic as you had been.

"your cock feels so…so fucking good inside of me, professor potter," you moan, resting your forehead against harry's as you slow your pace, thoroughly enjoying the feeling of him.

harry's eyes roll back, sinful moans escaping his lips as his head falls forward, watching you ride him slowly as he begins slightly thrusting up into you. he looks back up at your eyes, exasperated. "i'm gonna cum if you don't stop," he quietly warns you, clearly feeling a bit guilty at his eagerness.

you smile. "please, please cum for me professor. i've been such a good girl for you this semester, haven't i?" you tease him. 

harry groans pathetically. "so, so good," his eyes are closed, his face twisting with each thrust. "then cum for me, please, give it to me," you beg him, your hands gripping his shoulders as you feel your stomach tensing from your own orgasm.

harry's eyes pop open, his gaze on you softening as his hands find your waist, gripping onto you desperately. "[y/n]..." he moans your name again, and you can feel yourself tipping over the edge. your pace becomes a bit slower as your legs start shaking.

harry moans as he starts to spill inside of you, the warm sensation fueling your orgasm as you both hold onto each other tightly, riding out your highs together.

after a few moments of slow grinding and weak kissing, you carefully stand up from your position on harry's lap. you guide him to your bathroom, where you help each other clean up, with a few more inevitable kisses and longing hugs along the way.

you get dressed into different clothes, and offer harry some as well. he declines, instead putting his clothes back on as he tells you he has to bring all his supplies back to his house.

you help him button his shirt back up and tie his tie before pushing yourself to ask the dreaded question you didn't want to know the answer to.

"so," you say softly. "what now?"

harry looks down at you lovingly, but he isn't quite smiling. "well, i'm no longer employed here," he states. you nod your head slowly, allowing him to continue.

"so, while it's not technically wrong, i'd still like to try and take this off campus, if possible," harry chuckles.

you give him a surprised look. "you want to see me again?" you ask quietly. harry can't help but laugh at you, kissing your forehead as he holds your cheek.

"you have no idea," is all he says before he leans in for another kiss, holding you close, knowing you're finally his.

[springtrappd]

You said in one post that the author of Solar Lunacy is ableist. Could you explain how they're being problematic? I know almost nothing about them or the story itself, so I wouldn't know if they've said or done anything sus. Also, thank you for actually criticizing the Daycare Attendant stans, almost nobody in this site does that.

thank you for asking! it's rare to see, you're right, but it's also rare that people are willing to actually engage with that critical posting, so -- again, thank you! as for your question: oh boy, can i!

first: the basics. dissociation is a psychological response to overwhelming stress wherein the brain... disassociates from itself, placing a barrier between itself and the harsh reality. the most famous dissociative disorder is dissociative identity disorder (DID), known formerly as multiple personality disorder (MPD) or split personality. did occurs when someone without a fully-formed identity (read: a child) undergoes such severe stress that the 'brain' dissociates from its identity itself, creating alternate identities (personalities) to deal with the things they can't. these alternate identities work together to form a system. it's way more complicated than that and you can read more on it here and here but that's the bare minimum for the ignorant in the audience. we all caught up? good! moving on.

now, the question of whether or not the daycare attendant is a system is a touchy one. i've seen multiple different stances on the matter, seen a lot of arguments, and typed (and deleted) several hundreds of words about it, and the answer that i've come to is that, for the sake of this argument, whether the dca is a system in canon doesn't matter. what matters is how bamsara treats them. how do they handle the characters, how do they frame the switches in personality, the confusion, all the parallels to real-world symptoms -- how do they expect the viewer to feel, what do they pull from the cultural lexicon, yadda yadda. does bamsara -- regardless of their intentions -- depict the dca as a system, and if so, how do they handle it?

the answer is that they depict the dca as experiencing altered identity states, switching (and even blurring) between identities, and even repeatedly acknowledges them as a plural entity.

and it is these behaviours, specifically, that are used to make the dca scary. bamsara's daycare attendant is scary because they experience altered identity states. because they blur identities. because they are a plural entity. because they display the textbook symptoms and behaviours of a disorder most commonly caused by childhood sexual abuse. and it is the fear that this is inspires that makes them (but especially moon & eclipse) sexy.

now, one can argue that this is simply in line with existing horror media, and they would be correct: most pop culture depictions of dissociative disorders are extremely ableist, and have real-world consequences! but what makes it really, really shitty is that... i don't want to think about this stuff. i don't come to fandom to be reminded that people are terrified of what they don't understand, and that that very very often includes the mentally ill. i don't want to be reminded that there are people who don't believe dissociative disorders exist at all. i don't want to reminded that they -- the sick, the survivors, the unlucky 140 million -- are spoken of in the same way as monsters. i don't come here for harsh realities. but solar lunacy is the most kudos'd fnaf fic on ao3, and we all have to live with that.

if you liked solar lunacy or bamsara's content or... whatever, i don't particularly care. i'm not mad about people thinking evil alters are sexy, or engaging with horror content that says shitty things about systems -- it's your life, live it how you please (and i've got a vanny icon so who am i to judge lmao). sometimes the things that make us happy are kinda shitty, and that's okay! our views are shaped by the society we live in, and there is no society on earth that is kind to the mentally ill -- there's no way to undo that, to stop that from influencing you in some capacity. but... all i ask is for you to think about this stuff, and try to educate yourself on the topic. there's nothing wrong with making a mistake, or having flaws -- but there's something wrong with making a space that feels unsafe, that reflects some of the more uncomfortable aspects of our society, that unintentionally hurts people. it's just up to you if that something is something you care about.

i hope that answers your question, anon (and anyone else who's curious). take care, mate!

(edit 13/01/2023: due to some technical difficulties on tumblr's end, the notes aren't quite showing up properly, so here's the link to bamsara's reblog chain if you can't find it.)

[seththepotate]

I dunno, I feel like people saying the Fallout show retconned New Vegas are making a *lot* of assumptions based on a few tiny pieces of info.

It's a very self-contained story. We did not learn much of anything regarding the outside world of the current West Coast besides what was important to our characters. Our main characters are a Vault Dweller who of course knows nothing, an apathetic Ghoul who if you don't remember, spent a lot of time prior to this season imprisoned in a casket underground, and a BoS initiate who was plucked out of Shady Sands as a child. Three people who either do not know or do not particularly care about the NCR or its dealings.

*Shady Sands* fell. Not the NCR as a whole. Also it's implied that Shady Sands maybe was not the capitol when it fell ("the FIRST capitol of the NCR). But yes I will agree that the fact of it getting destroyed by Vault Tec bullshit kinda sucks.

I've seen people say New Vegas looks like a ruin? And yeah sure it doesn't look perfect but:

For one it's a wide shot from very very far away and let's be real, NV never looked amazing aside from the casinos. It is very very weird that the surrounding area (camp McCarren, the outer vegas ruins, etc) aren't really present but also let's remember the reason so many big locations were so close were due to map limitations with the game. In the show the scale of these places is much more in line with real life.

For two, even if it is a ruin, Fallout: New Vegas *itself* gave many potential near future issues that could plague the city. Divide Storms, the Cloud, Tunnellers, continued problems with Fiends, hell even the Legion could have still caused problems depending on what ending ends up being canonized. We just don't know yet. And I'm sure we'll find out.

This series so far seems to be really leaning into accepting the past non-Bethesda Fallouts (really liked seeing the original 10mm) and I'm sure we will see some really great shit in the future seasons.

Just my two cents. Maybe season 2 will come out in three years and prove me wrong but I think some people are jumping the gun on their outrage.

[fatalism-and-villainy]

Do you think he was ever in love with Bedelia like he was in love with Will? I ask this because Bedelia says they were both the "brides of Hannibal". But Hannibal never courted her like he did with Will, Bedelia came into Hannibal's life much before Will but he never pursued her like he did with Will. Mads said he wanted a future with Will unlike with other people he hooked up with Alana, Bedelia or Anthony. He took her to Italy as a consolation prize when Will betrayed him. Even in Italy H was pining about Will all the time and telling Bedelia how much he loves Will. I know he slept with Bedelia but he probably slept with Anthony too and he slept with Alana, Hannibal is a hedonistic guy who sleeps around. For him sleeping with someone doesn't mean he is in love with them. But when Will confronts Bedelia, she pretends as if Hannibal held them in the same regard which is obviously not true. Hannibal would choose Will over her in a heart beat and even she knows it but yet she acts as if Hannibal sees them both equally. I don't understand why? 😭 Why do you think?why make herself seem like a competition when she is not?

So, a few things.

To answer the first question - basically, no. I think the show is fairly clear on the fact that Bedelia wasn’t an adequate substitute for Will. (Though I will say that the question of whether or not X character was “really” “in love” with Y character, or - as I sometimes see people writing on, when they fell in love - is not particularly compelling or generative to me as a meta topic. Personally, I’d rather focus on the specifics of relationships, the patterns of interaction characters have with one another, what they represent to one another, etc, than trying to definitively categorize their feelings.) Also, if this is in response to this post, then I don’t really consider the question of whether or not characters were “really” in love, or preferred other people, particularly relevant when shipping something. Shipping to me is applying an erotic lens to a dynamic I find compelling, not about whether the character were “in love” with each other or would make a dedicated or long-lasting couple.

I don’t consider myself to be beholden to the opinion of Mads, or anyone else in the cast and crew, in my analysis. Their sentiments can be interesting, and can inform readings (and tbh I’ll pay more attention to Fuller than the rest of them, given that I respect his vision as a creator), but they are not canon, and I think treating them as such is stifling to fandom analysis. Furthermore, in this case, I don’t need to consider Mads’ opinion, because… I have the show itself, which devotes considerable attention to Hannibal’s feelings towards Will and puts forth a lot of effort in positioning Will as somehow exceptional to him.

It’s not really clear that Hannibal did sleep with Bedelia. The exact nature of their relationship is pretty deliberately left ambiguous. (My personal interpretation is that they didn’t sleep together, though they were both aware that it was a possibility.)

Hannibal had practical reasons to sleep with Alana outside of his own enjoyment - namely, grooming her as a character witness, and keeping her close such that the threat of him hurting her would keep Will in line (hence his “I’ll give Alana Bloom your best” line after Will’s attempt on his life). I do agree that he doesn’t seem to see sex as sacrosanct, and has no qualms about using it as a manipulation tool, but that’s about as much as the show gives us as to his feelings about it. (It is plausible, given everything else about him, that he’d enjoy it for hedonistic reasons, and that is pretty in line with my own headcanon, but the show itself doesn’t specify exactly, because “how the characters feel about sex” is a question it’s relatively uninterested in devoting a lot of attention to.)

With that out of the way, I’ll get into Bedelia, namely this:

But when Will confronts Bedelia, she pretends as if Hannibal held them in the same regard which is obviously not true. Hannibal would choose Will over her in a heart beat and even she knows it but yet she acts as if Hannibal sees them both equally.

She doesn’t actually, though. In fact, in her interactions with Will in 3B, she's often emphasizing the romantic and obsessive nature of Hannibal's feelings towards Will specifically.

Consider:

Will: You hitched your star to a man commonly known as a monster. You’re the Bride of Frankenstein. Bedelia: We’ve both been his bride.

Will is the one who raises the “bride” comparison, and Bedelia’s answer is to impress on Will the fact that he also should be taken to hold this position. And then later in the episode, we get her saying “my relationship with Hannibal is not as passionate as yours.”

And then in 3.12, we get this exchange:

Will: Bluebeard’s wife. Secrets you’re not to know, yet sworn to keep. Bedelia: If I am to be Bluebeard’s wife, I would have preferred to be the last.

So when Will again raises a romantic analogy for Bedelia and Hannibal’s relationship, Bedelia responds with a conditional, rather than confirming it, and then implicitly gestures towards the romantic nature of Will and Hannibal’s relationship (and the fact that Hannibal seems to value Will more).

So Bedelia fairly consistently maintains that Hannibal holds Will in special regard. And while she seems to have been jarred out of her usual patterns of behaviour with Hannibal in a comparable way to Will (hence the “why is one patient worthy of compassion and not another”/“why is one murderer worthy of compassion and not another” exchange), she doesn’t appear to be carrying a torch for him - when Will asks her if she’s been to see Hannibal, she responds, “I’ve seen enough of him.”

So, as to her motivations - I’d say she’s invested in impressing on Will the force of Hannibal’s influence on them, hence why she pushes the angle of the romantic intensity of their bond. For example, this quote:

Your experience of Hannibal’s attention is so profoundly harmful, yet so irresistible, it undermines your ability to think rationally.

And then her pushing to get Will to accept his culpability in what happened to Chilton, and chalking it up to Hannibal’s influence:

Bedelia: Is this what you expected? Will: I can’t say I’m surprised. Bedelia: Then you may as well have struck the match yourself. That’s participation. Hannibal Lecter does have agency in the world. He has you.

And then, in the wounded bird exchange, there’s her claim that Will isn’t truly a killer, and that his compassion is what drives his violence:

You’re not a killer. You’re capable of righteous violence because you are compassionate. …The next time your instinct is to help someone, you should really consider crushing them instead. It might save you a lot of trouble.

Well, taken in tandem with her emphasis on the intensity of the bond between Will and Hannibal, and on Hannibal’s influence on Will, the conclusion I’d draw is that she wants Will to recognize and recoil from Hannibal’s pull on him and what it brings out in him, and she wants him to direct his compassion towards Hannibal in the form of killing him. (I think her trying to get Will to “crush” the next person he feels the urge to help is also referring to Dolarhyde, ftr, or at least has narrative resonances in that direction, though that ofc backfires onto her).

So, I don’t think Bedelia feels threatened by the bond between Will and Hannibal out of romantic jealousy. It’s more a sense of self-preservation. I have a longer post in me about this, but suffice it to say, that’s why she tries to get Hannibal to eat Will in 3A - because it’s Will or her - and the interpretation that she’s trying to get Will to kill Hannibal in 3B works well as a parallel to that and makes sense as to her motivations. Because she knows that if Will and Hannibal join ranks, she’s toast - and going by the stinger in WOTL, she was right about that.

I hope this was helpful!

[kandisheek]

FIC REC WEEK 9 – AUs

Cold Space, Warm Welcome by Annie D (scaramouche)

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: T Words: 15,572 Tags: Sci-Fi, Misunderstandings, Pining Steve

Summary: Tony’s spent a couple of years flying around the galaxy in his best friend Rhodey’s spaceship the Iron Advance, doing what could perhaps be counted as ‘hero’ work. Among their allies is Steve Rogers, captain of his own crew, with whom Tony has a… potentially friendly relationship. When Steve’s ship is irreparably damaged, Rhodey takes him and his whole crew onto the Iron Advance to recover. Tony’s not at all nervous about this, because so what if this is the first time Steve will see him without the Iron Man armor?

Reasons why I love it: Steve is so whipped for Tony, oh my god. I adore their dynamic here, and it's so much fun to see all of Steve's fumbling attempts to make his interest known from Tony's point of view, who is utterly oblivious. And the setting itself is fantastic, it really paints a picture of what their lives in space are like. I love this fic to bits, and I bet you will too!

The Scars of Your Love by blue_jack

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: M Words: 5,462 Tags: Scars, Angst with a Happy Ending, Breaking Up and Making Up

Summary: On the day Peggy moved out, Steve stood naked in front of the mirror and looked at all the ragged lines running over his body. He felt like someone had taken a knife to him, slicing every inch open, and he didn’t understand how there wasn’t any blood. He traced one particularly thick scar on his stomach, gritting his teeth against the pain, the memory of the first time he’d brought Peggy over to meet his family and all the teasing that had accompanied it burning through his mind. He couldn’t imagine her marks ever disappearing, and in that moment, he didn’t want them to, didn’t want to ever expose himself to that much hurt again. Once in a lifetime was enough.

Reasons why I love it: Having heartbreak leave actual, physical scars on your body is such a kickass concept. Emotional pain is so real it often feels like it should leave scars, and Steve sure hasn't been spared during his lifetime. I really like how the whole later conflict with Tony is set up because of Steve's relationship with Peggy. It feels very true to Steve's character that he acts the way he does. And oh my god, poor Tony. I love this one, please go and check it out!

Missing and Ravished by SailorChibi

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: E Words: 8,760 Tags: Serial Killer Steve, Officer Tony, Gore

Summary: Officer Tony Stark really did not mean to fall in love with a serial killer.

Reasons why I love it: This might sound weird, but if canon Steve ever became a serial killer, I imagine that it would be exactly like this. I love the whole premise of the fic, of Tony being torn between his duty, his morales and his emotions, and the moment it all comes crashing down is immensely satisfying. I love everything about this fic, so I hope you give it a shot!

Steve Rogers' Life Is Not A Romance Movie (He Wouldn't Get The References, Anyway) by someonelsesheart

Pairing: Steve/Tony, Pepper/Natasha Rating: T Words: 7,909 Tags: High School AU, Humor, Enemies to Lovers

Summary: Steve hasn't always had this ridiculous crush on Tony Stark. (Or, the one where Steve is his polite old self and doesn't really hate Tony Stark (unfortunately), Tony is a child progidy and apparently a cab driver now, too, and high school is still high school, even when you are the son of a billionaire.)

Reasons why I love it: Steve the spitfire makes an appearance! They're both such dorks in this, and the way they stand up for each other in front of bullies legitimately makes my heart melt. Also, Pepper and Natasha are queens, and I adore them with my whole heart. Definitely check this one out, it's adorable!

Stellar Love Affairs by AvengersNewB, BladeoftheNebula

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: E Words: 5,407 Tags: A/B/O (Omega Tony, Alpha Steve), Mating Cycles, Space AU

Summary: Captain Steve Rogers gets assigned to command the starship Avenger. Everything is going as expected until he sets eyes on Tony Stark, who happens to be the first omega Steve's ever met.

Reasons why I love it: A Star Trek fusion, A/B/O, fuck or die fic written by two of my favorite people in this fandom? It's like this fic was written for me! I love everything about it, from the worldbuilding to the smut to them getting their heads out of their asses and finally communicating. It's fantastic, and I highly recommend you check it out for yourself!

[raayllum]

Cube Hostage Exchange Theory: Ezran Edition

Cause I've been feeling this one and figured I may as well toss in the newest two cents.

This is something I've talked about before (X, X) but much more briefly, and with the theory still on the table for S6, I figured I'd cover more of my bases.

The usual caveats / disclaimers to get out of the way:

Cube Hostage Exchange Theory (CHET) is a TDP theory dating back from September 2020 (shortly after Through the Moon released) speculating that Rayla would be taken hostage in exchange for Callum freeing Aaravos by handing over the Key of Aaravos. It was based on ideas of 1) the key being important to Aaravos' plans, 2) the irony of Callum literally freeing Rayla while chaining himself further to Aaravos' will, and 3) that Callum would be a pawn in Aaravos' plans (deduced well before S4) due to this thematic ties to freedom.

The biggest assumption the theory made/makes is that the Key of Aaravos is something that Aaravos is actively seeking/wanting, or something he needs; this aspect of the theory is still (technically) pure speculation.

CHET may not happen in S6 due to the fact it beat for beat already basically happened in 5x08, just with Finnegrin swapping in for Aaravos as an instigator. This is partially due to the fact that the irony regarding chains and freedom (Rayla being freed by Callum chaining himself) also came to pass alongside the captive/loved one's life being threatened and Callum subsequently being willing to help said antagonist.

That being said, I still fully think a Variant will happen, if you will, whether that's due to Callum getting in over his head with the coins, or something more directly threatening Rayla.

This theory resides on the (canon) interpretation of Callum being willing to do anything to protect his two most important loved ones (Ezran, Rayla) even if that means helping Aaravos and/or putting the world in danger. This post itself is not going to debate or explain this interpretation, but if you are interested in learning more about it, I'd recommend this meta and this tag.

I still think Callum making a choice that risks subsequent possession / world ending behaviour is more likely to be for Rayla. This is for a few reasons: 1) they still have an ongoing relationship rift/conflict to heal, and this could be a way to do it; 2) we know thanks to 6x01 that Callum and Rayla are heading to the Starscraper alone with Ezran being back in Katolis, so there is just more opportunity; 3) more of the narrative legwork has been done with Rayla specifically, particularly in regards to the possession plotline in particular; 4) Ezran has never represented destruction to or for Callum, but Rayla has more overtly negative associations which would fit; 5) Rayla has had more scenes and lines with said Cube / Key of Aaravos throughout the 4 seasons its been displayed (1x04 multiple times, 1x05, 2x07, 3x08, 4x02, 4x03, 4x07) than Ezran has (noticeably only one in 4x07).

All that being said, let's talk about the way the narrative might work / the evidence we have at present for CHET happening, but Callum dooming the world for his brother instead. Otherwise known as CHET: EE (Ezran edition).

The Necessary Narrative Legwork

As stated, CHET: Ezran Edition would only, to me, have a strong enough narrative purpose to happen IF it served as the basis or conclusion for a reconciliation arc between Callum and Rayla (currently ongoing) or between Callum and Ezran. While the brothers are not currently fighting, that doesn't mean they won't in the future.

Season six might have to squeeze it — it would have to be in the latter half of the season, which might be too delayed for Aaravos' proper release, but who knows? — but it definitely seems like the brothers are hurtling towards some sort of conflict.

However, I think the way the conflict is framed / what it ends up being centred on. For example, if the brothers just fight over whether or not to free Runaan (as there are indications that they might), I don't think that by itself leads to a resolution like CHET: EE. But if the brothers fight over Runaan, and it makes Ezran feel like his brother isn't choosing him, and they part on bad terms... Now we're talking.

Now, S6 could have room for a broyals conflict. They could fit over Runaan, as noted, or even other issues in their relationship. This would lay the groundwork for something like a CHET: EE based reconciliation happening, provided there was conflict to resolve first.

I'd also like more scenes / lines concerning Ezran with the cube. Thus far, Ezran has been there in 3/4 seasons where we've seen the cube (S5 is the only season with zero appearances outside the 5x08 intro), but he's only commented on it in 4x07 with "Callum, put away your cube!" when it's glowing because the moon opal on the Bridge of Darkness.

Episodes such as 1x05 particularly feels like a missed opportunity, perhaps, if this was the direction they were going to take, given that Ezran easily could've stepped in during Callum and Rayla's miniature disagreement over it (the "it's a glow toy" + "this doesn't end well for you" foreshadowing is there in addition to Callum looking at the Star rune) to make a comment about it still being worthwhile / perhaps a fun toy. But if Ezran's hide and seek game motif (more evident when they were searching for the hidden prison) comes into play and is tethered further to the cube's game motif, that's alright by me.

So yeah, two key points I would need to happen could happen, largely:

The brothers having some kind of serious conflict wherein Callum prioritizing Ezran in this way could help reconcile it

Ezran having more screen time with / regarding the Cube and Aaravos in some manner

That's not to say there's no legwork already put in, though, for an EE, which is part of the reason why I'm making this post. So let's talk about the two biggest points in this edition's favour:

The Orphan Queen Connection

Despite not receiving the Key himself (which could be a parallel to the Sunfire siblings regarding Kim'Dael's collar), the EE has a significant point in its favour due to Ezran's associations with the Orphan Queen. He's been directly compared to her both in appearance and in personality, as he shares her ability to Truth Tell in the face of lies, narratively speaking:

I should have seen it before. Ha! Long ago, it was a human who saw through the Fallen Star’s schemes and helped Xadia put an end to them. You look so much like her.

I've written before about the parallels there seems to be when it comes to the Jailer and Callum, two clever human mages, and the Orphan Queen Ezran, two royals of a blood line tethered in some way to truth telling and Aaravos. This parallel connection of the Jailer and the Orphan Queen being involved in imprisoning Aaravos, and Callum and Ezran witnessing / failing to stop if not also being involved in his release would be an ironic layer.

There would be another additional layer if the Orphan Queen's use of the cube was what led to him being sealed away, and now the Key is being used to spare her descendant, his brother's, life three hundred years later.

Thus far we don't know much else about the Orphan Queen besides this, so I could see Ezran's role with the Key being to partially discover what it is or what it might do, and for Callum to figure out further how it works and how to use it, but we'll have to see. I think this piece of evidence would be stronger if both brothers had been very involved and interested with the Key thus far - a true piece of dual heritage for both of them - but given that it's been so much more in Callum's corner and much less in Ezran's, I think this aspect is probably what would need to be developed the most in S6 to work out.

That said, the strongest piece of evidence we have for an EE of CHET is namely the place where we first learn the cube is called the Key of Aaravos at all, which is in...

Harrow's Letter

Harrow's letter exists in story for a few reasons:

To resolve Harrow and Callum's arc with each other, particularly to affirm to Callum that he belonged within his family / as Harrow's son. This is folded into Harrow discussing his sons' bond and what he wants for both of them in addition to point 3 and 4

To largely tie up Callum's grief regarding Harrow, as while we still see bits and pieces of it (you can argue 2x08 and 4x03 touch on it), 2x06 is the last time Callum's specific grief about Harrow is discussed (at least for now)

To complement Viren's narrative of what happened with Harrow's own take on the same events, particularly to push forward and the name the Narrative of Love vs Narrative of Strength dichotomy (which S4 and S5 have spent a lot of time deconstructing further)

To explicitly introduce the concept of the Chains of History and Harrow's own desire for freedom, which is alluded to in early S1 but not fully developed, and therefore pave the way for him to show up in Callum's 2x08 dreams

To give us the info about the Key of Aaravos early enough we could sit with it, and also let the foreboding build

I do think the placement of the information about the Key is interesting, because the way it's presented perhaps fulfil more of our traditional expectations in the fantasy genre. Of course the protagonist happens to stumble across a neat, funky family heirloom with a tease for a cool power-up to come. It is, after all, the first time we hear the name Aaravos.

However, they very quickly (aka like 1.2 episodes later) give us the name of Aaravos, and we immediately know it's nothing good. The more negative associations with the cube are also added to in 2x08 with the dream imagery, which makes a lot more sense now that we know just how deep the ties between Aaravos and dark magic really go.

With this in mind, the most telling lines from the letter for an EE CHET is, I believe, this from Harrow:

But as a father, I have a selfish wish. For you and Ezran to be... free.

Now the letter itself talks about Freedom almost as much as it talks about Love, and indeed, love — specifically a Narrative of Love — is posited as something that can and will free you, in contrast to the Narrative of Strength bound by the chains of history. We also know Startouch stuff is associated with wishes, so that's another point. And Harrow's last words to Callum were "Take care of my brother." From a familial standpoint, there's more than enough permission / merit here to go ahead.

The letter introduces the Key and talks about the brothers. It talks about chains and love and freedom. And these are all things that would be very much literally present in in a Cube Hostage Exchange in which Ezran is the hostage or person the key is being handed over to save.

And while I think it could be a possibility on the table, because Callum absolutely would do this for his brother... I still think if we're gonna get a scenario like this, it's going to be Rayla, or it's going to be no one. And here's why.

The Other Side

You may have noticed throughout this that this edition of the theory depends on even more could haves than traditional CHET already does, and hasn't really talked about Ezran's personality or interplay with sacrifice as a theme. This is because that, without an external conflict pushing things forward, this display of devotion doesn't really affect Ezran much. He knows his brother loves him and has never doubted this; Ezran is very measured about sacrificing himself for what he believes in, but is also always willing to accept help and other people's aid. Ezran is sacrificial, largely adjacent to his crown and his childhood, but his arc itself is centred around concepts of power, duty, and justice over a core theme of sacrifice or even freedom.

Subsequently, Ezran likewise has not been associated heavily with chains, nor is Callum someone who has broken Ezran's cycles or chains, literally or metaphorically. Although Ezran is undeniably tethered to freedom because "a child is freer than a king" and him being briefly (meaningfully) in prison, freeing Ezran has never been a main plot concern Callum or Rayla has had to contend with. The closest they come are the boys working together to free Rayla in 1x04 with Bait, Callum and Rayla working together to get Ez out from the icy water in 1x06, and Soren freeing Ezran from prison (and getting him to his council) in 3x05... and that's about it. Nor is Ezran a big part of Callum's mage arc; they normally discuss things other than magic, Callum rarely uses magic to protect his brother (although S5 definitely had an uptick), and Ezran is pretty separated from notions of magic within Xadia outside of his ability to talk to animals. (It's kind of like how while Callum and Zym have a strong bond, Ezran has a more emphasized one and largely carries the human side of human-dragon reconciliation alongside Soren, whereas their siblings are more elf and magic focused.)

This might shift if/when freeing Harrow from a bird is a possibility, and that's not to say it couldn't be Ezran just on this basis — but that TDP usually prefers to include things at a lower stakes level or even as a joke, and then ramp it up continually until it reaches a breaking point. We can see this even in 6x01 with a scene of Soren leading a blind folded Opeli for comedic effect, only for blindfolds to clearly be important later on in S6 with Callum and the Celestial elves. Similarly, Callum freeing Rayla both literally and metaphorically was set up consistently and periodically throughout the first 4 seasons, to the degree I could predict some of the specifics in 5x08 even years ahead. Then, the show reaffirms this pattern as well as early on in S5 (5x01 in particular), so when it came to a head in 5x08, it felt natural and earned from a thematic standpoint.

Even if S6 went in hard with the Broyals having a fight in the back half, they would still have to drench Ezran in freedom associations to me to effectively get to where I feel like a CHET: EE would totally work. That's not to say there couldn't be over avenues there I'm not seeing now, or a thread I've missed that's been steadily building all along that S6 then makes evident, but this is largely where I've arrived with everything we currently know.

Conclusion

TLDR; Cube Hostage Exchange: Ezran Edition has merit largely due to the Orphan Queen parallel and Harrow's letter, but does not seem to have enough plot buildup at this time to make me lean in that direction. Instead, I still learn towards if there is going to be this scenario or a variant, it will either be for Rayla ( / her parents adjacently) or not at all.

[nordictwin]

talk to me about your iwatex headcanons and your big brain au i am b e g g i n g

My friend, I would love to.

General headcanons:

I know it's a commonly used pattern on clothing in the game, but I headcanon that teen!Sol adds that little diamond-shaped pattern to their clothes, because they want to match with Flulu as they grow. Because this is a "Flulu and Sol love each other very much" corner of the fandom.

If Noctilucent was less genocidal, they'd be the reluctant supervisor of all the kids, whenever they venture outside the colony. They'd be Tang's favorite Gardener, and they'd help her realize that Instance probably isn't the best role model.

This may as well be canon, but Utopia is up there with Kom in being loved by the kids - no matter the time-line or universe. They think she's the coolest. (Nem had a little crush on her, once upon a time).

The Overseer, while duty-bound to follow their instructions, is actually bored with the status quo of things. If the humans can learn to co-exist on Vertumna and repeat their past mistakes, then they're actually delighted to see new, intelligent life on the planet. I feel like a lot of those little "Sol vibes with nature" moments in the game? That's the Overseer joining them, feeling their connection to the Wormhole.

Sol and Dys are the Overseer's favorite children, no matter their choices. They don't know, but they've got a god-like grandparent following their every step on the planet.

This is related to another AU I have, and not so much a headcanon as it is canon to that AU, which I've called the Solution AU, where Sol and the Overseer do some ✨✨ space magic ✨✨ and send Sol's soul back to before the Convergent Domain and make Sol a part of Vertumna itself in preparation for the Statros and Helios to arrive, but: in that universe, where there's no Sol among the Stratos, Flulu and Geranium adopt Tang and Dys, and because Flulu isn't afraid of calling Instance out on her unhealthier mindset and the like, they end up as happier children and more open-minded.

Okay, Everyone Knows AU lore time:

Because Tang is already aware that Instance, though having good intentions, is in fact not a Good Person. This means she's also a lot more critical of Instance's methods. This results in Instance gaining herself a tiny rival - annoying at best, when Tang is still pint-sized, but much more of a threat to her position when she's grown and learned more from the Gardeners. There's mutual respect between them, and Instance is proud as a teacher, but a part of her also despises having a child, of all people, question and counter her every move.

Let's talk Governor Eudicot. Eudicot knows there's something up with the kids. She doesn't know what, but she knows there's something with them. All the adults do, but most chalk it up to trauma from the crash or an extreme reaction to suddenly being planet-side. She's particularly baffled by the almost complete 180 from Marz, but... she can't say she isn't pleased with it. I dare say Marz ends up as an unexpected favorite amongst the children, right alongside helpful and cheerful Sol.

As stated numerous times before, Sol is living their best life. Just always so happy and relaxed, it'd driven Vace up the wall, if he hadn't also changed. It's to the point where the Helios think their augment is just "always being happy". Nope, they have Calm Temperament (because that's my favorite augment for them). They just suddenly have nothing to stress about, and their friends are just getting along so much better now? Wow!

Truth is, of course Sol can tell something is up, much like Eudicot. They're a little oblivious, but not stupid. Noct has never been around like this before, Sym is always on the verge of collapsing from laughter, and Vace hasn't broken Rex's arm. They know that for this many things to change, something seriously big must've happened while they were out cold. But at this point... who can blame them for not wanting to question anything? This time around, Sol can get to be a child and grow at their own pace. Nap in the sun, goof off in class, roll in the dirt and all the things they haven't got to do in a long, long time.

As stated before, but even more so for this AU, the Overseer loves Sol to pieces. Truly grandpa's favorite little star child.

[antianakin]

@theneutralmime

I mean, as per TCW canon, we know that Rex at least has THOUGHT about the inherent contradiction with the clones' relationship to the war, enough to have seemingly made his peace with it. So it seems reasonable to assume that the other clones around his age who've survived to this point, too, have at least thought about it (so this would be people like Jesse, Cody, Bly, Gree, Fox, Thire, etc, basically anyone we might've met within the first season or two of TCW that is clearly still around by Order 66). Cody has his line about how it's hard to be the one that survives in season 7. So yeah, I'd say it's fair to assume they have a complicated relationship with the war itself and that this is something every clone would have to come to their own conclusions about. Not all of them reach the same one, though. Cut chooses to desert peacefully and Slick chooses to betray them all for a chance to escape. So while someone like Rex (and probably Cody) has made his peace with being made to fight in a war, not necessarily everyone does.

As for their relationship with the JEDI, I imagine that's also going to vary from clone to clone, but what we know from higher canon is that they honestly DIDN'T feel all that complicated about the Jedi. Rex discusses his complex emotions about the WAR, but he never seems to feel that conflicted about the Jedi themselves. He's always pretty positive about his relationships with Anakin and Ahsoka, to the point that he can't fucking STOP gushing about Anakin in Rebels. He also doesn't show any discomfort around Kanan and Ezra (unlike the obvious discomfort we see on Kanan's end) and pretty happily starts to build up a friendship with Ezra. Wolffe on the other hand DOES seem more conflicted about it, but his primary issue is fear of the Empire and the attention that the rebels' presence could bring, not necessarily fear OF THE JEDI themselves. During the chip arc in season 6, Fives explicitly calls the Jedi the clones' best friends and seems equally as upset about the fact that the chips would make them kill the Jedi as he is about everything else.

Even if we look at Cut and Slick, ONLY Slick has a complicated relationship with the Jedi, while Cut never even brings them up as part of why he deserted. So that's one example among many many many examples of the clones loving their Jedi and considering the Jedi their best friends. While you can certainly use Slick to argue that it's possible not every clone loved the Jedi and that some of them might've seen them more negatively, there is OVERWHELMING evidence of that being an exception, not the rule.

As far as what's in TBB in terms of how the clones feel about Order 66, there is... very very little. TBB's main characters don't actually care about the Jedi really at all since, other than Echo, none of them served with Jedi all that much so far as we can tell and never built up any kind of relationship with the Jedi. And Echo's relationship with Anakin (and potentially Ahsoka, we never actually get to see them together outside of the Citadel arc, so I'm not sure how much time they would've actually served together canonically but it can't have been much) isn't touched on at all in TBB and doesn't seem to impact his reaction to Order 66 in any way. Hunter seems upset by Caleb's lack of trust during Order 66 and does go out of his way to protect him by lying to Crosshair about killing him, but after that moment, there's no real attention paid to the Jedi. We saw Cody in season 2 and he says a few very vague things about how maybe they made some bad choices because at this point we have to assume Cody still HAS a chip that might be making him feel like he'd CHOSEN to turn on the Jedi even if it's weakened enough to let him doubt his actions. But because he's speaking to Crosshair, he's not saying anything particularly explicit and he's in one episode before he disappears. Most of the other real clones we meet in TBB are either freed of the chip already (Rex, probably Gregor), didn't have Jedi to turn on (Howzer, Cut, Mayday, also probably Gregor), or seem to be fully under the chip's control still (Wilco). So what discussions ARE had about the impact of Order 66 don't really center on the Jedi much at all, leaving us a little in the dark about how the clones feel about that in the more immediate aftermath of it.

However, given the way we see Rex, Gregor, and Wolffe reacting in Rebels, the way Rex reacts in TCW season 7, and everything else we see about the clones in high canon during the war itself, it's pretty safe to say that while there might have been some clones who weren't that upset about killing the Jedi regardless of whether the chip was active or not, the VAST MAJORITY of the clones would never have turned on them at all and have to spend the rest of their lives either mourning the Jedi and feeling guilty about what they were forced to do, or struggling to figure out why they'd even done it in the first place when something in them is telling them it was wrong.

[kanansdume]

I'm finding my views on Satine Kryze to be really following my views on Padme these days, which seems appropriate given that Satine has always felt like a knock-off Padme anyway and her entire existence is intended to help parallel Padme and Anakin's relationship.

But I really hated Satine when I first watched TCW a few years ago. I couldn't stand the way she treated Obi-Wan, I felt like the entire romance was pretty shoe-horned and ham-fisted and full of a lot of romance tropes between hetero couples that I'm not fond of. And I also interpreted the explanation we get about Mandalore's current peace and what had to be done to make it that way as... not great and kind-of a cultural extermination of some kind.

Since then I've followed a number of people who happen to love and defend Satine and her political choices, read through their metas about why the warriors being exiled to Concordia was a reasonable choice to make at the time. I've also read a few posts that still condemn that choice the way I did initially.

And while I think the INTENTION of the writing here was that this was a reasonable choice for Satine to make, that she was exiling the people who refused to be peaceful and practice their culture without trying to start a war all over again, the way it's said and written does NOT feel like that. At least, not to all of us.

For one, the usage of the term "warriors" in the line. They say they exiled "all the warriors" to a nearby moon. They don't say "we exiled everyone who refused to stop fighting and killing for a war that had already stopped" or "we exiled Death Watch who were a well-known terrorist group" or anything like that. They JUST say "warriors" which does feel vague enough as a description to feel like she is exiling literally everyone who happens to be someone who knows how to fight and has based their culture around being warriors, regardless of whether they were a problem or not. It also then feels hypocritical of her to have done so when she very clearly has guards who can fight on her behalf, so either she didn't exile ALL of the warriors or she managed to get a few people she decided to give exceptions to in order to learn how to protect her.

And because of this vagueness, the natural assumption to make from there is that Satine has basically forbidden everything that WENT ALONG with warrior culture: wearing armor, using weapons, learning how to fight, etc. Everything that we've been told via other media is VERY IMPORTANT to Mandalorian culture. I think we can reasonably decide that this was... PROBABLY not true, there's no canon evidence for this being true that I can recall. She never SAYS anything about forbidding armor or learning how to fight and only forbids OUTSIDERS from carrying weapons. She herself personally refuses to use lethal weapons and doesn't appear to wear any armor ever, but I don't think there's any mention of her not allowing other people to do so. Obviously her guards do in fact wear armor and carry weapons. She doesn't even condemn Padme for picking up a blaster to help fight off some smugglers at one point, despite that theoretically going against the rule of no outsiders carrying/using weapons.

Satine ALSO seems to be someone who does, to some degree, take a lot of pride in Mandalorian culture and traditions. She says as much when Padme shows up. So in some ways, it doesn't make sense that she'd entirely eliminate a portion of that culture so long as those who practiced it weren't using it to actively hurt other people.

That being said, Satine is someone who is... particularly implacable in her beliefs. We see this MOST clearly with Obi-Wan and the way Satine discusses the Jedi and the war with him and the way she condemns his entire people for fighting in the war at all, despite all of the obvious reasons TO fight the war that we have as the audience. It's never made canon in the show itself, but we also know from Lucas's interviews that the Jedi didn't even have a CHOICE about whether to join the war as Generals or not, they got drafted. But Satine appears unwilling to listen to Obi-Wan's reasoning, to hear him out on why they're working to protect people, to re-evaluate her personal definition of "peacekeepers" for someone else's culture. She never budges on this particular issue, not once. She and Obi-Wan basically just stop discussing it at some point.

So with that in mind, it does feel in character that Satine could be so insistent on keeping a war from happening that she could exile everyone who refused to stop practicing warrior traditions, regardless of whether they were hurting someone else or not. Especially if she was a young traumatized teenager at the time, reacting to a civil war that kept her on the run for a year and appears to have done a lot of damage to the planet.

And then we come to the part where they tell us that EVERYBODY who had been exiled had died out. Everyone. Within a span of TWENTY YEARS, which is not that long of a time. Which calls into question certain things like whether the people who were exiled were allowed to LEAVE it in order to find a place to live that accepted them so long as it wasn't within Mandalorian space. Were they allowed to make contact with other people to bring them resources and supplies or not. If they had just said "everybody left the moon and we assume they have since found refuge elsewhere" that would be different. But they all are supposedly DEAD, which to me speaks of a more concerted effort to not allow those people to leave and an equal effort not to take care of them. While it's entirely probable that this report was a LIE given by Pre Viszla and all of those people have simply now joined Pre's Death Watch, neither Satine nor anyone in her government appears to feel all that upset about it. It's not a tragedy that no one was able to stop in time, a dark spot upon their history and Satine's leadership that she acknowledges.

And that feels particularly condemning to me.

But the problem is that I don't think we're intended to see it that way. I don't think it was intentionally written as something the audience would actually condemn Satine for.

Which means that this is where we hit upon the Padme Problem. Which is when they care so little about their female characters that the nuances that are implied by the dialogue and writing are glossed over to the point that the character ends up seeming more of a terrible person than they were intended to be. Padme's brushing off of Anakin's massacre of the Tuskens makes her seem like a racist whose grand values suddenly don't exist, solely because Padme's motivations aren't the ones that matter in this scene and nobody cared enough about her when writing this to realize exactly how it would come off to an audience. With Satine, it's the unfortunate usage of the vague term "warriors" and the fact that they all died combined with her implacable attitude towards Obi-Wan and the Jedi which is a result of them using bad romcom tropes of the time for that relationship. All of which leads to Satine feeling like a tyrant who advocates for cultural extermination, because it's the only way some of these inconsistencies make any sense sometimes.

Which is too bad, because Satine perhaps COULD'VE been a better written character, could've been more interesting as one of the few characters in Star Wars who is actively advocating for pacifism and looking at how that fits into the world around her. But she just... isn't a better written character. Not unlike Padme. Or her sister.

[twistmusings]

i dont enjoy the shrinkwrapped eels myself but i did enjoy your analysis on it! i think another point is that the stitch card did show floyd with better draw shirtless anatomy, which in itself leads to either "new card weird art" or "well hes /differant species/ in this card of course hes different" conclusions :P

Hi Anon!

That is a good point! Like I said, I'm never going to fault someone for finding the cards strange or off-putting, especially considering how strange some of the anatomy choices for those cards were.

You make a great point about the beachwear Floyd card! I had a similar line of thought that ended up being cut out of the final post, but you're correct that since we do have multiple Floyd cards that show his upper body at this point, we can compare them.

CW: GIF under the cut, images of monster designs from movies and games.

Again, forgive a bit of the crunch, as I'm working the the teaser image for the new card. I also overlaid the two cards using the major skeletal landmarks such as the collarbones and the shoulderblades. Of course, this could be an artistic difference and it seems like the perspective is making Floyd look a lot skinnier than he is, but at the very least it makes it easy to see the differences in his shoulders and chest.

A few things of note - we can see that Floyd's shoulder muscles are more pronounced and as are his collarbones. However, I would honestly say the muscle definition is comparable in his actual abdomen, it just looks like the Merman Form Card doesn't have as much fat, which is consistent with what I said in the first card. I think it's pretty interesting to actually see the comparison of the two cards because it makes it easy to tell where the designer for the card was trying to highlight the 'inhuman' aspects of Floyd's design - particularly how his skin hugs his collarbones. You don't see that much in humans because of the layer of fat I mentioned in the original post - we get a much smoother line from our collarbones to our pectoral muscles.

Essentially, in his 'human' card with stitch, Floyd has much more human features, and I believe even with the anatomy weirdness in the newer cards, that was probably intentional.

Another point to bring up, this sort of goes hand in hand with wanting to have a monstrous design. Canonically, the Leech twins are both noted to be a bit strange and off putting, and the Freshmen mention being startled by how different they look when they see them in the sea. A little fun fact about monster design is that you see more angular "sharp" designs and musculature and bones below the skin because it gives a more visceral feel to the monsters in video games and media. Here are a few examples of what I mean:

For example, at the top you can see the Xenomorph from Alien, and you can see how the design resembles a ribcage and how there's a muscle-like band between the shoulder and the chest. Under that is a boss from Bloodborne, and again you can see these similar hallmarks in the shoulder anatomy and ribcage aspects of the design. Then, the one on the bottom is Acrid from Risk of Rain, who is an unlockable hero that is mean to be alien. Even though you can tell Acrid isn't meant to be human, you can still see the elements of the design that are inspired by humans in the arm and chest muscles, even in the pixel art style. I have also included an image of Acrid from Risk of Rain 2 so you can see how his design was translated into three dimensions and how you can still see the pectoral muscles even with the softer shape design for the character.

That is to say, if you wanted to make a palatable monster character, typically the best ways to give a monstery feel while still having them seem humanoid is through muscle definition and shape language.

The cards, to my understanding, are dropping in the Japanese release in about two days from me posting this, so I'm definitely very curious to see what the groovies will look like. (And also if they will be crying as has been a pattern so far. I must admit I'm very curious if that is a consistent theme what would make them cry.)

[outrunningthedark]

There's literally zero suggestion that Ryan is uncomfortable portraying a queer character compared to Oliver. IDK what your anon is talking about. Like you said he acknowledged the difficulty of getting a storyline like that out to the GA due to toxic masculinity and homophobia but those are just the facts on the ground not an indication that he's personally opposed. Oliver's good at giving diplomatic soundbites to the fandom and cultivating a persona online, Ryan's more blunt and he answered honestly that's the key difference here. Their chemistry has never been denied, Oliver didn't say anything particularly revolutionary, the question is whether there's a serious intent to act on that to create a romantic storyline and I would have to say I agree with Ryan I don't see it happening. There's really no need to be like oh we know Oliver's cool but who knows about Ryan because it's like based on what exactly? Him stating facts that none of this was planned and it's unlikely the writers/creators will pivot?

Honestly I get a little uncomfortable with the way some people ascribe certain views and attitudes to Ryan while simultaneously blowing smoke up Oliver's supposedly enlightened ass, it feels a little prejudiced and in bad faith.

(This isn't aimed at you, I think you're very fair and I agree with you almost all the time. It's just a comment at the language I see used and the implications when this is brought up)

Just want to thank you for reiterating my point because it's something I think is going to have to be repeated over time as each season passes without Eddie being Repressed or Buddie going canon. We don't know how Ryan feels about the Buddie as a legit ship, whether he wants the show to go for it or not, because he doesn't approach the subject the way the fandom wishes he would. He's matter-of-fact. He's realistic. He's seen enough within the industry and in his own life (upbringing and friends he may have made along the way) to understand the tough spot the show put itself in by making neither Buck nor Eddie queer from the start. TBH, R "vs." O is not unlike the way older members of our fandom try to interact with/educate the younger ones. So many here have grown up in a time when queer representation is becoming "the standard" even if TV shows aren't making it past the second season. But those of us who remember the *really* dark days aren't scared to talk about the ages of the folks running these networks or the demographic they're making the shows for impacting how they envision a story line and ensure it plays out. Oliver represents the younger fandom. He understands why fans he's interacted with love the ship and would say yes in a second. Ryan is the rest of us going "Do you hear yourself right now? Do you really think Buddie is as popular IRL as it is online?" There is value in Oliver publicly supporting Buddie, absolutely. But there is also value in having someone speak in a way that aims to prevent fans from getting their hopes up over a story line that may never come true. Ryan is not trying to discourage you. He's trying to protect you and your feelings.

[divinekangaroo]

What Tommy secretly likes about Lizzie in bed you reckon?

The Alfie shaped dildo killed me XD

Which brings me to the question - are you still planning to write their Paris honeymoon fic?

XD my writing strength/pleasure is taking the most crack seeming premise and making it heartbreaking because let me tell you, wow, did i want that to be an absolute tearjerker

*

Honeymoon fic - it's still on the timeline list as one of three bits of interest for me between S4 and S5, and I've more than half outlined it, but I've been hit with an Absolute Plague of Anxiety lately really crimping recreational activity. The kind that makes opening a partial doc which made perfect sense when I wrote it and read it previously, suddenly seem like a pile of gibberish stacked on top of itself.

So I'm slowing down to try to sort out what's going on, get back into myself again a little. Mostly, I think the anxiety it's the ominous impending cascade of Demands with work, daycare, parental aging needs, legal stuff, financial stuff all lining up, plus ongoing baby-led minor sleep deprivation. Putting sentences together in coherent ways starts to feel like another Demand that my instinctive self is noping out of; but I've been through this before and just have to work through it somehow...

*

Ooh, is that a headcanon!Tommy or a canon!Tommy question? Headcanon sex stuff is easy, I've a long slippery line of these leveraging from (extrapolating? diverging? offshooting from?) very random canon fragments, such as writing his softness/fondness of looking at Lizzie's bare feet actually triggered by my personal OMG NO when Diana stepped on Tommy's boat with her stockinged feet, rather than anything he's ever done with Lizzie's feet. I could go on if this is what you mean?

But canon interpolation feels quite difficult because of how they play the sex scenes - with exception of Tatiana and That Act, which is reused repeatedly throughout the series, the fact he's having sex and/or who with (and the conversations before/after the sex) seems dominant, so there's not a lot of internal sexual interpolation available. He just kind of...has sex. (This is one reason why I was fascinated with the show, TBH: dude has lots of sex and fits a certain stereotype because of that but actually seems kind of...put out by it? performs but doesn't really get into it? is often clearly into the person he's having sex with, but the sex, while enjoyable, is just what's now necessary and he's not particularly for or against it in any personal way?)

If anything, I'd say it's probably Lizzie's facial expressions particularly S5 onwards as intimacy increases: unlike the other sex scenes which are filmed full body, lots of nudity, touching etc, the Lizzie scenes by contrast have Tommy paying a lot of attention to her face more than anything else (albeit that in itself is a consequence of needing to be filmed, and possibly Natasha O'Keeffe has a no-nudity preference they needed to respect? Their scenes are notably different anyway). Even in S2/over the desk, there is a certain kind of Complicated Look he wears when he takes in her face and her sadness, in the aftermath. And if you look at the whole head-cradling, face-smooshing, nose bumping, nuzzling kind of stuff he does to show his connection with others, I imagine a not-too-far stretch is that he likes looking at her very closely throughout. So my bet is on him getting a full secret kick of feeling when he inadvertently makes her smile before/during/after, big and broad and unexpected, like, that’s for me no one else but me I did that, especially because she so hardly ever smiles like that.

[fedorah-the-explorah]

I saw a take that said the family dynamics between team red (especially shadowsan + carm) are somewhat exaggerated by fandom and there's not actually a lot in canon that supports a lot of popular head canons or attributed roles. And it's like, first of all, please keep your hurtful truths to yourself. Second of all, I'm probably going to need a read more.

Despite myself, I really cannot disagree with the points made by this particular poster. It's a sound argument. Carmen Sandiego (2019) is an adventure series. It's fast paced, action packed, and focused a decent amount on edutainment. This is understandable, this is after all, the point of the franchise as a whole. The characters have enough sustenance that they are likeable, though they are most noticeably flat.

I'd argue that Shadowsan and Devineaux are the most dynamic characters, but even then the handling of their respective character arcs leaves something to be desired. Much like the rest of the series, their storylines feel rushed and added in as a second thought. I get the impression that the show was envisioned simply as an adventure of the week type of thing. They had a premise and a gimmick and they wanted to run with it. This is fine. But then came the overarching story lines and... Well. There were no master pieces.

We'll take season one as an example. The first two episodes were pretty solid. They had a coherent and well executed story line supported by characters with personality and potential for growth and depth. The pilot episode of a series serves to set up character arcs and overarching themes without having to go too into depth because of the fact that it's simply the beginning. The first two episodes of this series fulfilled their purpose, and they were executed well. I will even be generous to the rest of the season's story line and say that there did seem to be at least the minimal amount of foreshadowing and groundwork laid for the twist at the end of the season.

The problem then comes into play with the remaining episodes. From episodes three to eight, the story line is episodic and self-contained. There's a formula and it works well without there necessarily being a greater need for depth. I was perfectly invested simply with the caper by caper formula. It was never thought-provoking for me nor did it need to be. It was just a bit of fun. And then came the final episode and it was... interesting! I was pleasantly surprised by the sudden inclusion of an overarching story line, if not scratching my head a little.

Shadowsan's reveal made a decent amount of sense in hindsight, but didn't come across as particularly expertly crafted. It was a sudden shift to the status quo with little build up, and it felt vaguely out of place. It's an episode that could have been executed better if the narrative had started to shift earlier in the season or if there were more episodes between "The Chasing Paper Caper" and "The French Connection Caper." Instead it's everything all at once and I found myself thinking, "Oh! Okay! So we're doing this now."

Upon rewatching, there is some build up that can be noticed and recontextualizes, but it's not much. Even knowing how the season concludes, episodes 3-8 still feel episodic and disconnected from any greater story line. You've got some angst about Carmen's origin, and Shadowsan's insistence about sending Tigress for a second time reframes itself as a calculated decision rather than misjudgment but that's about it. They have the bare essentials of story telling, but they're not skillfully crafted. And that's... fine! This is children's TV. I don't actually hold it to the same standard as adult television, and I do think it's a pretty decent show for what it is.

My point then that I want to address is this idea of bare essential story telling. Carmen Sandiego doesn't lack the elements needed to tell a good story. They're there, just not expertly executed. The post that inspired this spiel mentioned that Team Red reads more as friendly coworkers. I don't fully agree with this, but I see their point. I will also say that I don't think this was what the writers had in mind. I do believe they were meant to be read as Found Family, in fact, it is more or less explicitly stated in "The African Ice Caper." It's just that, like every other aspect of the show, it's handled in a way that gives hints of further depth while not fully conceptualizing the theme.

This is not a smear campaign against the series. No, this is very much a product of passion. It's an entertaining show with beautiful animation and captivating fight sequences. I was hooked from the first episode and I continued to be so through the end of the series. I'd say one of the greatest draws of this show lies in its weakness. We're only given impressions of characters' further depth and personality. With the obvious exception of Carmen, we're only given glimpses of characters'back stories. In regards to over arching story lines, we're only given bare bone elements. This isn't great from a critical standpoint, but it does open the door to a large array of fan interpretation and transformative fanworks.

Because of the flaws in canon, fans are not bound by strict limitations. They are free to come up with their own unique interpretations of characters, they can flesh out back stories however they see fit, and otherwise flimsy storylines lend themselves to deeper fan-driven exploration.

Frequently on Tumblr, you'll see posts that disparage fanon for the way that it tends to flanderize and flatten characters. And yeah! This is bad! Unsurprisingly, flattening complex stories into easily recognizable tropes and clichés is actually the devil! A lot of times in fandom, you see this sort of corporate brain rot that simplifies stories into familiar and easily consumable pieces of "media" ("Consuming media," my beloathed)

Fanon gets a bad rep. Is it deserved? Mm. A good majority of the time, maybe. But where is the discussion for fanon in the other direction? What about when fanon expands a work of fiction? When it assigns more complexity than canonically given? There's something innately human about connecting with a piece of fiction and wanting to do more. We don't so easily let go of things, you know? When you love a piece of art that's otherwise disappointing, you have this desire to see it do better. To meet its potential. I think that's where fanon in the opposite direction stems from.

I think the fandom surrounding Carmen Sandiego (2019) is a decent example of this. The characterization is admittedly lacking, but that's done nothing to stop fanartists from coming up with their own rich interpretations of characters and their relations to others.

Carmen and Julia are two characters that share a decent amount of screen time, but their relationship otherwise suffers from the amount of time stretching between interactions. This has done nothing to deter fans. It seems I can't throw a stone in this fandom without hitting beautiful pieces of fanart depicting the two, or multi-chapter fics exploring the two's dynamics, or impassioned ramblings about them.

The same thing can be said about Graham and Carmen. They share a decent amount of screen time and their interactions are compelling, but they're too far and in between. What's there is not fully developed. Again, bringing it back to the idea of bare essential story telling. They have what they need to hint at the intrigue of both these dynamics, but they're not satisfactorily executed and both relationships suffer as a result. Their relationships, and indeed, the show as a whole, kind of feels like a completed puzzle with various missing pieces.

I chose Julethief and Redcrackle to use as examples, but similar things can be said of every other relationship in this show. Player and Carmen have moments that hint at a dynamic friendship built on unwavering trust and care, but it's only in a few select scenes, (though, the scenes that do do this are phenomenal and make me want to cry-- and I'm so sorry shippers-- but Player and Carmen have a monopoly on the hard hitting emotionally impactful moments in this show. I don't make the rules, I'm sorry.) and the majority of their interactions are reserved for getting down to business.

However, because of the glimpses we do see, you see countless fics detailing their friendship and building on to what we see in canon by going behind the scenes. I myself have extensive head canons about these two and honestly, what I've written and published is only the tip of the iceberg. Player is a bit of a tricky character to get a grasp on because of his limited role in canon, but what we do see opens up all sort of interpretation. I have such a fun time writing him because I can use what I see in canon to shape my own ideas about how he would act in various scenarios. My version of Player is far more dynamic than what we see in canon, but it's only like that because I love the canon character so much. I want him to do more, I want him to be more. My creativity is piqued with this character.

Moving on, let's focus on Shdowsan and Carmen, my other beloved dynamic. I have so many ideas about these two's relationship, and I especially enjoy delving into the dynamic between him and Black Sheep. They suffer the same problems as prior discussed. The scenes building on their relationship are sparse, but they are there. Take for several examples:

Shadowsan interacting with little Black Sheep in the "Daisho Caper," Shadowsan's stated remorse at not being able to tell Carmen about her own family, Shadowsan nursing her back to health after "The Stockholm Syndrome Caper," his stated motive for hiding the truth of her lineage from her, Shadowsan telling her he'd be with her till the end of the line, Shadowsan reminiscing about little Black Sheep when he visits the destroyed VILE Island, Shadowsan's dedication to finding Carmen's mother for her, Shadowsan telling her she can finally rest, and, and, and, and.

There is certainly a reason that fans have interpreted he and Carmen as being father and daughter, and I am in no way surprised by the beautiful and extensive explorations that certain fans have taken into these two's shared history (@frozenwolftemplar my beloved)

After all, you really do have to wonder about the hardened assassin who couldn't bring himself to harm a child or her father. Could there have been more done on the show writers part to really cement their relationship as adoptive father and daughter? Yes, absolutely. Does the development of their relationship leave something to be desired? Yes, absolutely. Do the existing interactions inspire me to delve further and call up melancholy memories of me and my own father, thus making me want to extensively detail their shared history before expanding on their present relationship so that I can process my own feelings about my own father? Yes, absolutely. Is this type of connection a deeply valuable faucet of story telling and kind of the whole point of creating art to begin with? I think so!

Carmen Sandiego doesn't necessarily set things up just to drop them so much as it strives to create compelling story lines and interesting characters before ultimately failing to delve deep enough or dedicate enough time for these things to fully come into their own. They're there and they exist, but it's like... Drinking water with oranges in it. I can taste the oranges, but damnit, now I want orange juice.

It utilizes story telling techniques, but not enough so that the show fully benefits from them. There's an impression of character dynamics, back stories, and personality but they're not fully recognized.

However, it is because of these flaws that fans can take the source material and go absolutely bonkers with it. By engaging with the story and characters, you really get the chance to flex your creative muscle. It's like a sandbox. The sand is there, the box is there, and the tools are there, but what you make is up to you. I've seen some deeply moving pieces of writing come out of this fandom, and it's insane to me how some authors can do so much with so little. In engaging with fanworks for this show, I've drawn connections to my own life and my own relationships. There are lines of writing that have been engraved into my brain. I've met wonderfully creative people and I'm glad to be an active member of the community.

No, the show itself is no amazing piece of story telling. It's fun and it's entertaining, but it doesn't fully realize everything that it set out to do. It does, however, open the door to community as well as inspiring creativity and transformity, and that means the world to me.

[moe-broey]

My "Not a full thought" post about Emblems now being able to exist in Askr and the potential of timeline fuckery is coming back to haunt me.

@iamdarkness BUT I really did wanna reply to this more in-depth esp to have context on the Engage side of things as well! And tbh it could be a really interesting thing to dig into, I just feel a bit out of my depth about it (the FEH autism does not extend far past Askr. If I'm entirely honest 🧍)

Hoping to clear the air on some things! Such as, Elyios (Engage) is separate from Askr/Zenith (FEH)! All the Emblems have their own "domains", in the form of a paralogue/map that's modeled after the respective Emblem's world. For story Emblems, you unlock these as you collect the rings, and for the DLC Emblems, that's how you recruit them. Unsure what this says about Elyios itself, if these maps are like. Pocket dimensions that are replicas of that Emblem's world or what. Given what I vaguely know about Emblem lore I'm gonna say replicas.

This is Askr's!

Which, is interesting that it Is Askr, because it's Emblem Veronica's domain.

But honestly I feel like I'm getting ahead of myself, because even before the DLC came out, I was under the impression that Engage took place after all FEs were said and done, timeline wise. Given the nature of the Emblems, and the set up of the story starting off "1000 years ago" (and that was just to set up the story of Engage! So it has been A While).

One thing (that feels very loose canon-wise) that made me feel Engage is after FEH is because, not only are there Bond Rings of the Askr trio, but their weapons are here too! This was a promotional thing, but. It's There

Something worth noting, is that Bond Rings are different than Emblems. They don't have a spirit in them, that's as animated as the Emblems anyway... they give small stat bonuses, and are of characters that are related to any given Emblem (so, Corrin has a collection of Fates characters for Bond Rings, ect). This Does have an interesting result where there's an overlap between some DLC Emblems and Bond Rings. Cases being, there's Emblem Camilla and a Camilla Bond Ring that's connected to Emblem Corrin -- and, this happened to Edelgard/Dimitri/Claude too! Each of them having Bond Rings connected to Byleth, and also becoming their own Emblems in the Get Along Bracelet LMFAO (all three of them are in there. It goes about as well as you'd expect.)

But I am. Getting a little distracted.

EMBLEM VERONICA

One line that stands out to me is Alear (named Milo here) saying he hasn't heard of Askr before. But like if I think about that too much my head might explode and also Alear was previously comatose for 1000 slutty slutty years. So. Take it or leave it, whatever this is implying

Also, interestingly, she takes the form of her post Book 6 look -- but there's some odd inconsistencies, like her personality being more young Veronica, and also, mentions of Bruno as if he was still missing in action and not. Well. You know. (I'd have to dig further into Bond convos for examples, which tbh may be a worthwhile endeavor! But for now Take My Word For It Please this is already so all over the place 🥲)

But the main reason I wanted to emphasize that dialogue (aside from it being interesting, to say the least), is how Alear doesn't know about Askr as a whole. And, in Alear/Alfonse Forging Bonds:

WHICH.... AGAIN.......... MADE ME FEEL LIKE. With everything going on in Engage, the Bond Rings of Alfonse/Sharena/Anna, their Respective Signature Weapons (feels particularly damning) and Emblem Veronica. It felt like, what happens in Elyios is something that has Yet to Happen. And that, Askr as we know it, has been long gone.

But then...... everything with the Katarina/Kris FBs............ how Kris was only able to be summonable because Katarina and Marth told their story............. and how it's just the Emblems that are specifically mentioned as Not Having Info on, not Alear herself or her friends. My head hurds so bad.

LIKE...... I GUESS???? My initial thoughts on "Oh yeah that makes sense the Emblems don't exist in Askr" was that they Didn't Exist Yet. Aughh but then ...... in-universe, wouldn't the same be true for. Anyone from "the future". Or does it just apply to ghostly jewelry apparitions. Because we KNOW that option isn't true, it's shown/stated that Kiran comes from a modern world like ours, and there's also the Tokyo Mirage Sessions idols. Maybe the Emblem thing WAS just a Kris case, but that feels SO ODD. Like the Emblems are intrinsic to Elyios it seems. Why wouldn't the Askr library, chock full of information about the various worlds and lives of Heroes, Not Have That Info??? Especially with royalty like Lumera (Alear's mom) having close ties with specific Emblems (Sigurd). And also off the top my head that's a REOCCURRING thing, that the royal families in Engage Are entrusted with specific Emblems that are passed down/protected across generations. Celica with Céline/Firene, Lyn with Alcryst/Brodia, to name a few. It just seems SO strange, because it Feels Like it would be basic information about the world of Elyios.

CONCLUSION?????

My head hurds so bad. Net zero information. I'm so sorry. I hope this helped!!!!!!!!! 😇🫡

[somethingboutafic]

OT5 Friendship

Get Out Of My Head (and I'll get out of yours) by Imogenlee (E) word count: 29,128 The one for the Bottom Harry Fic Fest where Harry bottoming is more of a side plot, because angst got in the way--but it doesn't really matter because the fest stopped existing when I was halfthrough.

nonstop earthquake dreams of you by lumineres (M) word count: 37,265 harry falls hard and finds louis already at the bottom

waiting for the tides to meet by nauticalleeds (E) word count: 59,877 Soulmate AU. Everyone is born with heterochromia — one eye is their own eye colour, while the other is the colour of their soulmate's. It's only when they meet their soulmate for the first time that their own eyes match properly. After a hazy night at a frat party, Louis wakes up to blue eyes and the shocking realization that he had met his soulmate, without any sober recollection. Seven years pass where Louis comes to terms with the fact that he'll never know who his soulmate is. Then one fated summer, a beautiful green-eyed photographer arrives at Louis' workplace, with promises of endless laughter and a familiar feeling in Louis' heart.

Atlas At Last by louisandthealien (M) word count: 83,037 Maine to California in ten days. In which Zayn’s an open-shirt hippie they meet somewhere in Ohio, Liam’s the pastor’s son running away from home, and Niall’s the number they call on the bathroom wall. It’s 1978. Harry and Louis are just trying to get to San Fran in time for the Queen concert.

Stranger Than Larry Fiction by Larrysmomfics (M) word count: 90,736 It's been twelve years since Harry met Louis on TXF, became best mates with him, eventually falling head over heels in love with him. Six years post One Direction deciding to go on hiatus and now everyone is doing their own thing. All the boys have solo careers, some are touring, and with their busy lives in play, Harry and Louis have sort of grown apart. Harry's been filling the Louis void by devouring Larry fanfics, giving himself a chance to love Louis from afar in his own way. So far it's worked for him and he's content with his love of Louis being of the unrequited variety. That all changes, however, when Harry reads a particularly emotional and classic fic in the fandom, and he simply can't help but call Louis despite his sobs to tell him all about it, inadvertently sending Louis down the Larry fic rabbit hole as well. OR A canon-divergent AU where Louis and Harry read Larry Stylinson fanfiction

Parallel by SomeDovesFly (E) word count: 96,550 OT5 poly AU, BDSM comfort fic. OT5 work on a hit show called Excavated where Louis, Harry, and Liam are actors, Niall is the director, and Zayn does special effects. Harry is new to the show and it's love at first sight for Louis. But he's not the only one.

Mine Would Be You by crinkle-eyed-boo(KimmieRocks) (E) word count: 114,698 Louis returns to New York City five years after he left it – and the love of his life – behind. He didn't intend to see Harry again, but fate has a funny way of pulling them together, whether they like it or not. After making a begrudging truce, they both start to wonder: Would it be so bad if history repeated itself?

The Finish Line (Is A Good Place To Start) by LoadedGunn (E) word count: 121,961 Louis Tomlinson, one-time Formula 1 World Champion, is looking forward to the 2013 season. He’s got Zayn in his garage and Liam in his ear, he’s got Cowell Racing backing him despite former indiscretions, he’s got experience and the best race car out there. Not to mention he’s the only racer they have, after Oliver dropped out late last year. It hasn’t occurred to him that Oliver would have to be replaced by February. That is, until he finds himself at a party celebrating Harry Styles leaving Ferrari for Cowell. Harry hotshot Styles, who broke a record last year and is probably looking to make a big splash. Harry Styles, who is talented and somewhat intimidating. Harry Styles, who left Ferrari for reasons unknown and seems kind of lonely and harmless in person. Lonely, harmless, hot as fuck. Whatever. The first thing Louis does is take him under his wing. From there it’s nine months of slow-burning romance, the past catching up to them, turning into the human puppy pile that is OT5 and a lot of feelings until, of course, reaching the finish line.

For As Long As I Can Remember (It's Been December) by green_feelings (E) word count: 128,451 After recovering from a severe accident that causes Harry to lose his memory of three years, he moves to London to start his life over as a star chef. Little does he know that when he falls in love with Louis at first sight, it’s not the first time they meet.

Save Me (from myself) by Imogenlee (E) word count: 159,321 The problem with being friends with Liam Payne was that he had a lot of friends... and forced them to be around each other. When they finished high school, both Louis and Harry were equally relieved that they wouldn't have to tolerate each other constantly or whatever it was that they did. For five years, it worked out perfectly. They'd only had to see each other a handful of times. Unfortunately, Liam had to go and get engaged, ask them to both be groomsmen, and then go full groomzilla on their arses. With just twelve weeks to plan the 'perfect' destination wedding and throw every ridiculous pre-wedding celebration Liam and his fiancée stumble across, it was safe to say they were firmly back in each other's lives. And no one could have predicted that was exactly what they needed.

Belong To The Rain by unscattered_horizons (NR) word count: 172,159 “We really are that couple, aren’t we?” Harry asks when taking a breath, eyes shut while he focuses on the way Louis tastes, the smell of his cologne warm on his neck, the way his hair falls against Harry’s face and tickles at his skin. Louis kisses him again before answering. “Probably, but you’ll have to be more specific.” He moves his hands onto Harry now, holding him firm. “The kind that just got a lock and key tattoo.” Harry groans when Louis bites his neck and tugs on his hair to pull his head to the side. “We have about a dozen matching tattoos, H. That ship sailed a decade ago.” Louis makes his point by squeezing Harry’s tricep where the literal ship that matches Louis’ compass is delicately inked into his husband’s skin. “Thank fuck…” Harry trails off, Louis’ hands moving around to hold Harry’s ass and shift their bodies even closer together, one leg between Harry’s while he pulls him lower down the wall. “Louis…” Harry doesn’t get an answer so he pushes his hips into Louis to get his attention. “Lou.” “What babe? You alright?” Louis pulls back so he can look at Harry fully. He gets one of Harry’s searching stares. “I want a baby.”

Be There by mission2feelike (NR) word count: 179,339 The one where their family has been torn apart and their hearts broken, but an accident, a snowstorm, cinnamon rolls, and the adorable Josie force Louis and Harry to finally face the truth, and each other.

One More Time Again by orphan_account (E) word count: 232,268 On the morning of his second sold-out performance at Madison Square Garden, Harry wakes up to find that he's sixteen years old, on The X Factor, and that he has a chance to make things right. A canon-compliant fix-it fic (sort of).

Down The Line by sunflouwerhabit (G) word count: 279,926 Star shortstop Louis Tomlinson only finds solace between the white-chalk lines of a baseball diamond, until Harry Styles- the absolute bane of his existence and (probably) the worst pitcher in Major League Baseball- becomes an overnight sensation in the city Louis calls home.

Of Mates and Men by bananaheathen (E) word count: 630,460 In which, Louis and Harry meet as best men for their best friends' wedding... well... sort of. Or, the one where Harry's just moved back from New York and Louis doesn't believe in romance. Or, I guess... the one where Zayn and Liam are getting married.