#parsletongue

[smileyvillainarc]

i want a fic where once James dies in the canon he goes back in time and ends up with the rest of the marauders on the train but this time James is more mature and so when Sirius starts to talking about how his family is expecting him to be in Slytherin, James tells him that he’ll be friends with him regardless knowing that Sirius will be a Gryffindor

only now we fast forward to the sorting and Sirius has now ended up a Slytherin and James is panicking because he knows Sirius is going to absolutely hate Slytherin and so what does he do - he convinces the hat to put him in Slytherin

only James is like the poster-boy for Gryffindor and the hat is like ‘haha nice try’ but James is there pulling everything he ever could until he remembers the one thing that he knew would immediately help change the hats mind

James Potter is a Parsletongue

so we end up James in Slytherin - happy that he’s with Sirius but also like oh shit i’m in Slytherin what on Earth am I going to do now ????

Side Note: I have many cool ideas as to why I think James Potter could be a parsletongue that I will definitely upload in a different post!!!

[00queasy00]

I’ve been thinking of Tom growing snake fangs whenever he speaks Parseltongue 🥰🥰 it’d be an automatic physical trait due to him being a the heir of Slytherin.

I also like to image that Harry maybe has an accent or a lisp when speaking Parseltongue due to not having the automatic fang growing abilities. His abilities is strictly via indirect inheritance from being a horcrux :3

[wordsarelife]

—gorgeous

pairing: mattheo riddle x fem!reader

summary: being in love with your best friend might be a bad idea, but drowning your sorrows in alcohol might be your worst one yet

warnings: underage drinking, partying, no usage of y/n, a few suggestive remarks

notes: this is my official entry for the hogmarch challenge of @thatdammchickennugget using prompt 2: “are you speaking parsletongue or am i really that drunk?”

the night was rushing fast away in front of your eyes, easy chatter, at the start of the party, quickly turning into drunken singing and shouting along to the music that was drowning out everything else.

the dim blue light that was shining through the ravenclaw common room did it‘s best to worsen the drunken state many of your classmates were in.

mattheo was sitting on a couch, wearing his usual cool demeanour and being surrounded by his friends. they were known for getting a bit drunk, but never making an embarrassment out of themselves through loud singing or obnoxious dancing.

and normally you were known for sitting right next to them and doing the same.

even though it was dark, you could see mattheo's head turn and his eyes searching the crowd for you. you had excused yourself to get something to drink. that had been over ten minutes ago and you were really debating to just go to bed.

the night had turned out differently than you had expected and you weren't really in the mood to act like it hadn't.

"someone is looking for you" a voice behind you said and you turned around startled.

"harry" you said relieved when you recognized the boy.

it wasn't like the two of you were friends, after all you were coming from vastly different groups, but since a project in astronomy you had become acquaintances, sometimes sharing a few nice words at parties.

"why are you standing here all alone? why aren't you with your friends?"

"why aren't you?" you shot back, making harry quirk an eyebrow.

"well played" he complimented and smiled "i was trying to get away from dean and ginny making out"

"ouch" it wasn't really a well known fact that harry fancied ginny, but you had noticed it right away a few parties ago and he had been able to read you well enough to know that you had known.

"it's alright" he shrugged "i just don't want to sit next to it"

"who would?" you asked sarcastically as you eyes fell on the couple, hungrily making out on the couch, successfully pushing seamus off.

it seemed that a few people felt way too comfortable in the ravenclaw common room.

"oi, it's no fun with these two" seamus complained, sympathetically hitting harry's shoulder on the way to the table with the drinks.

"back to you" harry grinned, seemingly uncomfortable with talking about his secret crush on ginny weasley more than necessary "why are you avoiding riddle? i thought you two were the best of friends"

"i'm not avoiding him" you said defensively, taking a big gulp from the vodka in your cup to prevent yourself from saying any more.

harry took a moment to study your facial expression, before he sighed in a tone that almost made you tear up "oh"

"no" you shook your head "no 'oh', stop looking at me like that, potter"

harry laughed dryly "too late" he shrugged "so, being the best of friends is your actual problem, huh?"

you didn't answer his question, but took another sip from the cup. immediately regretting it.

harry cringed "if you continue drinking at that rate you won't be able to speak a coherent sentence in a few minutes"

"maybe i don't want to speak coherent sentences anymore"

"so we're already at the point of drowning our sorrows in alcohol?" he raised his cup and took a sip "no, you're right, it doesn't look like you're unluckily in love with riddle at all"

you sighed "okay, fine, you're obviously smarter than you look" you rolled your eyes.

"well, ouch" harry said offended, but you could see a hint of mischief in his eyes. "am i allowed to join your little club of self-pity?"

"sure" you nodded "the more the merrier i guess"

"there's no better way to spend a party than drown yourself in self-pity with the girl you're kind of on good terms with"

"yeah, totally" you grinned "but i think if we continue talking at that rate we will be able to call each other friends in an hour"

"deal" harry laughed, before he grabbed the bottle of vodka on the table behind you, filling both your own and his cup back up. he put the bottle back and held his cup in your direction "to unrequited love" he said dramatically.

you grimaced, but raised your cup to clink against his. "to unrequited love" you toasted "and unexpected friendships" you added.

"yeah that too" he smiled before you both took a big sip from your cups.

"vodka is fucking disgusting" you complained and harry nodded, making a face that would allow the assumption that he had been thinking the same thing.

"at least it does the trick"

you and harry spend the next hour recklessly sipping vodka, while you were telling each other ridiculous stories. the vodka had a quicker effect than either of you had thought, making the both of you dance and refer to each other as friends sooner than you had predicted.

just as 'dancing queen' began to play and you were twirling on the dancefloor, did you notice the empty spot on the couch occupied by your friends. there was only one of them missing. before it could really register in your brain who exactly was missing, a voice rang out next to you.

"make room, potter" you and harry both turned around, looking surprised at the arrival of mattheo riddle.

"matty" you laughed after the few seconds it had taken you to recognize your best friend.

mattheo's arm darted to the side, catching you before you could fall to the ground. you had made the attempt to hug him, missing his body by a few feet. you had been closer to hugging cormac mclaggen who was standing off to the side.

"there you are" mattheo noted, gently taking your cup out of your hand, sniffing the contents and grimacing at the strong sent of vodka, mixed with a bit of orange juice.

"do you want some?" you slurred, grinning up at the boy, who's arm was still holding you steady.

"how many of these has she had?" mattheo asked harry, thinking he would be a little less wasted than you.

"like thirty-four thousand?" harry answered before him and you broke into simultaneous laughter.

"had to have been a lot" mattheo muttered, noticing the way you were laughing with the chosen one, gripping his arm, like you were old friends.

he let go of you, taking harry's cup as well, emptying the both into the bucket under the table with the drinks. he came back right in time to witness you saying goodbye to harry with a dramatic hug, kissing both his cheeks and lastly his forehead.

"yeah, that's enough" mattheo said, dragging your body back against his when he noticed you going in to plant more kisses on harry's face. he looked bad enough, the red lipstick you were wearing leaving marks all over his face.

harry smiled before he waved at you and turned around, stumbling through the crowd of students probably in search of his redheaded best friend.

mattheo rolled his eyes. "you're absolutely wasted, darling"

you turned around to look at him and unconsciously bring a bit of space between the both of you "is it that obvious?" you asked.

mattheo watched with a smirk, how you tried to balance yourself out, to just be able to stand. your arm ended up stabilizing your own hip and you almost fell full on to the side, when you moved your leg.

"not really" mattheo grinned "come on, baby" he softly gripped your waist on either side, guiding you in the direction of your friends. you closed your eyes, leaning your head against his shoulder, letting him walk you through the room willingly.

"have i ever told you how gorgeous you are?"

"i am?" he asked laughing.

"so gorgeous that it hurts"

"you're flattering me" he smiled, nudging your arm. "but maybe you should concentrate more on walking in the right direction"

he was right. it was taking you way too long to cross the room, thanks to your inability to still walk in a straight line, even with his help.

"hey" mattheo greeted, making the eyes of his friends turn on him. "i'm bringing her to bed"

"already?" enzo asked skeptically, checking his watch "it's only two a.m."

"hey guys!" you greeted when your eyes snapped open. you bend forward, plastering a kiss onto enzo’s cheek. "how the party you doing? good? good!" you smiled, nodding as your eyes fell closed, as you leaned back onto mattheo again.

"what?" theo laughed at your slurred words that had not made the slightest bit of sense.

"yeah, i get it now" enzo nodded understandingly, trying to rub your lipstick off his cheek.

"she's only been gone for an hour" blaise said unbelievingly "how did she get that drunk?"

"she's had approximately like more than a thousand vodka-o's according to potter" mattheo chuckled.

"potter?" draco repeated disgustingly "what has she been doing with potter?"

"harry and i are best friends" you gushed, giving draco an angry look. he rolled his eyes in annoyance, but without questioning your answer.

"let's not get ahead of ourselves, love" mattheo argued, a bit of jealousy in his voice.

"you don't have to be jealous" you softly touched his cheek "you know i love you more than anyone, honey"

blaise let out a loud whistling noise "seems likes she's your girl after all, riddle"

"oh shut up" mattheo said at the same time as you said "of course"

"better bring her to bed now" theo advised and you could feel mattheo nod next to you.

"i'll be back in a few minutes" mattheo promised, as he softly turned you around to be able to walk you in the direction of the door.

"no he won't" you slurred, turning your head in the direction your friends, gripping mattheo's neck and winking at them.

enzo hollored and theo laughed, while blaise repeated the whisteling.

"cheers to that" even draco was amused about you, as he raised his cup in your direction.

"i'll be back" mattheo assured again, pushing you forward.

"no you won't" theo shook his head, smirking as he watched his friend roll his eyes and gently guide you through the crowd.

"how about a shot of tequila?" you suggested to mattheo, perfectly awake again. there was no hint of the tiredness that had consumed your body only a few minutes ago.

maybe it was the alcohol or maybe it was the sound of a familiar voice indicating the beginning of the song 'whatta man' by salt-n-pepa, which was now booming through the boxes.

"no, no more alcohol" mattheo shook his head, suddenly being the kind of responsible he had never seen himself to become.

"oh my god!" you gushed when you finally reconized the song "that's my favorite song! let us dance, matty!"

he was distracted by two hufflepuff boys almost running into him, when you saw the perfect opportunity to escape his hold. stupidly enough, that was the only thing you could see, as you had promptly gotten lost in the crowd of people.

mattheo was at your side only a second after, making you realize that you had in fact just turned around, without moving more than a feet away from him.

"if you don't come with me on your own accord, i'll have to carry you" mattheo warned.

you giggled, clasping your hands around his biceps "let us dance" you pleaded, completely ignoring what he had said.

mattheo furrowed his eyebrows, still waiting for you to reply to what he had said, but you were busy watching a few ravenclaws and hufflepuffs downing shots. "or we could down some shots" you mumbled.

mattheo took that as answer enough, clasping one of his hands around your forearm and the other around your leg, as he bend down to throw you over his shoulder.

"matty" you protested, as he began to walk you out of the common room. you gave up arguing and continued to sing along to the chorus of 'whatta man' as mattheo walked you both through the crowd of people.

as soon as the door to the ravenclaw common room fell close behind the two of you, you slumped down on mattheo's shoulder, the tiredness hitting you immediately.

"do you want to walk on your own now, baby?" mattheo asked, but he could feel you shake your head. "can you use you words?" he was growing a bit concerned at your sudden mood shift, trying to make sure that you were still somewhat alright.

"no" you pouted "i don't want to use my words"

"you just did"

"i never let a man tell me what to do" you slurred and mattheo had to chuckle.

"clearly" he muttered under his breath.

he walked through the halls of the castle quickly, making sure that you wouldn't be discovered by one of the teachers. you would probably kill him if one of them saw you like this. you never really got that drunk often, so it was on mattheo to make sure that no one found out about it now.

he should've searched for you immediately after you hadn't come back. he shouldn't have waited an hour. but he was scared of annoying you. you were always together and he had taken your absence as a sign for you needing some space.

if he could, he would follow you around all the time, preferably holding your hand while doing so. maybe in another universe you would want him to do that.

"when are we there?" you asked, your hand wandering across his shoulder, before it finally found it's place in his hair, gripping it tightly.

"any second now" mattheo was trying to make sure not to shake your body too much, as he quickly walked down the steps to the dungeon. he wouldn't want you to throw up. "do you feel sick, sweetheart?"

"no" you muttered "i just want to sleep"

"i know, i know" mattheo patted the back of your leg "we're almost at the door"

he hadn't lied. it only took a few more seconds, before he whispered the password and the door to the slytherin common room opened, revealing the familiar green lighting as he walked you both inside. he crossed the room, climbing the stairs to your dorm.

he took his time to set you down on your bed, making sure that no quick movement could make you feel uncomfortable. he unfolded your blanket, spreading it across your body.

he was ready to leave the room, before you called him back.

"matty" you cried and he perked up, walking back to the bed. you threw the blanket to the side dramatically, revealing your trousers and shirt. "i can't sleep like this"

"oh" mattheo said dumbfounded "do you want me to take them off?" he asked slowly, gripping the waistband of your trousers.

"are you speaking parsletongue or am i really that drunk?" you giggled at the joke with your eyes still closed.

"you're really that drunk" mattheo answered, rolling his eyes at your unseriousness "and it's not funny"

"it's a bit funny" you opened your eyes and giggled at his facial expression "why are you so serious, matty?"

"i should've kept an eye on you" he answered "you don't like to be drunk"

"i can make my own decisions" you argued, crossing your arms.

"obviously" mattheo nodded "should i take them off?" he repeated his question from earlier, but the tone of his voice made you sober up immediately, well at least a bit.

"are you really angry at me right now?" you asked surprised.

"i had to leave the party to bring you to bed"

"that's not the reason you're angry" you said, knowing him well enough to see through his lie.

"okay, fine" he sat down on the bed and you sat up, drawing your knees to your chest and hugging them with your arms. "maybe i'm a bit angry that you would rather spend your evening getting drunk with potter than speaking to me"

"matty"

"no, it's fine" he shook his head "i shouldn't be angry about how you choose to spend your time. goodnight" he stood up from the bed, walking to the door quickly, so voice rang out before he was able to twist the doorknob.

"can you please just stay?" you asked and he turned around in surprise.

"what?"

"maybe i chose to spend time with harry, but i'm choosing to spend the night with you. isn't that more important?"

"that's not how it works"

"okay, fine" you said, tired of arguing "do you want to know the truth? spending time with you is super hard while i'm madly in love with you" even though you were a bit more sober than before, he could still recognize the drunkness in your voice, especially because you were never that bold.

"madly in love with me, huh?" mattheo repeated surprised, his signature smirk immediately replacing the frown on his face.

“it’s embarrassing, i know” you buried your face in your hands, hiding your rosy cheeks from his eyes. he softly took your hands in his, freeing your face of them.

"don't hide from me" he smiled "and it’s not embarrassing, because the truth is, that i'm madly in love with you too"

you smiled up at him. “can you kiss me then?” he smiled at your question, but shook his head.

“no more kisses tonight” he muttered, softly stroking your hair “we can do that tomorrow, as often as you want to, when you’re sober again”

“okay” you nodded.

he gently helped you to exchange your trousers for pyjama bottoms, before he took of his shirt and climbed into bed next to you. you cuddled close to his chest, your hair tickling him whenever you moved.

"blaise was right" you said finally "i'm your girl after all"

"you always were" mattheo whispered back, softly kissing your forehead, before the both of you fell asleep, holding onto each other.

[sallowsswan]

Not A Gentle Lover

Tom Riddle x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Smut, pure smut, rough sex, p in v, fingering, praising

Summary: Tom pulls you away from what you're doing to have his fill of you...again.

Soo this is my first time trying to write smut, it's not the best and my punctuation is probably messy but I'm still posting this anyway~ Minors DNI 18+ (hides away in shame)

Tom Riddle was not a gentle lover.

He was possessive, obsessed even, when it came to how good your fucking cunt felt when he was buried so deep inside of it. This was the fourth time this week the head boy had sought you out, always without a single sentence uttered. Just those dark eyes boring into yours as he grabbed you by the wrist and pulled you away from whatever it was you were doing. You followed behind wordlessly, trying to keep up with his pace as he nearly dragged you to his private chambers.

Once the doors were locked his hand had already snaked its way up inside of your skirt, sliding one finger inside your folds while his thumb plays with your clit. Hissing at how wet you are from just the mere touch he’s burying his head into your neck as he’s pushing you backwards, both of you stumbling until you fall back against the mattress of his bed and he’s towering over you. He slides a second finger inside of your cunt making your back arch up as he begins to pump his fingers in you. The way your walls squeeze around his fingers is maddening, how can something like this feel so damn good? He shows no mercy to your clit, rubbing it till the point he knows you're overstimulated. Your whines turn into cries as tears prick at the corner of your eyes threatening to spill over, until your hips buck against his hand begging for release. But Tom Riddle wasn’t a gentle lover

Instead of giving you your orgasm, he rips it away, leaving you nearly sobbing as he pulls his fingers out and shoves them into your mouth, and you hopelessly suck on them as he’s using his other hand to unbuckle his belt and get his pants down. The way he moves is like a man starved, so desperate and in need. When he’s free from his restraints he’s leaning over you as he pulls his fingers out from your mouth. His hand pulls your skirt up until it’s resting over your hips. There’s no foreplay, no easing into it, he unceremoniously shoves his cock deep inside of your cunt and growls at the sensation of you taking him in. He moves his head burying it into the side of your neck as his hands move down to your thighs gripping them tightly as he spreads you open more. “Good Girl.” Two little words, yet they can carry the pleasure of the entire world in them with how he says them when he’s with you. This was his way of praising you. You were such a good girl for taking his cock in the way you did. Such a good girl for letting him fuck you stupid, and such a good girl for never pushing back with him. Tom Riddle was not a gentle lover, this man was the definition of rough. His hand found its way to your throat as he began to mercilessly thrust himself deep within your cunt, not stopping when you whine or whimper because he knows his good girl can take it. 

And boy do you ever.

You’re left writhing beneath him, hands fisted into the sheets as words escape your head and all that comes out of your pretty little mouth are cries of pleasure mixed with pain. Tom has the skill to fuck you so hard that you’re left sore and wanting more. You already know tomorrow is going to be a rough day for you from the grip he’s got on your thigh and the way it’s making its way slowly toward your hip. With each thrust his hips seem to find more prowess, more power as he rails into you with such an intensity it makes the bed beneath you two shake. He’s growling against your neck, the sensation of his lips vibrating against your skin drives you mad as you can barely make out what he’s saying…is that parsletongue? You wonder if in his state he’s trying to summon the basilisk in the chamber of secrets, or if he’s merely trying to will his own basilisk deep inside of you to stay strong long enough until he’s had his fill.

It was the latter.

Tom proceeds to fuck you like this for hours, in that time the rest of your clothes find their way strewn across his room and with every orgasm he gives you he fucks you right through it. This man is like a tom cat in heat, unable to stop himself until one final grunt escapes him and he cums deep inside of your cunt one last time collapsing onto the sheets beside you. Things stay like that until you both pass out, and when you wake up hours later on your side, and you are sore all over. Your mind is reeling over the events that just happened, you’ve done this with Tom many times now and yet every time you guys finish you end up waking up wondering ‘what have I done?’ ‘Am I just a plaything?’ ‘What does this mean?’

And every time this happens you feel an arm slide underneath your head, and another wraps its way around your waist. Your mind has been so loud that it wakes Tom up hearing the way you’re spiraling inside your head. He presses his body against your back and his lips press against your neck, his touch almost like a feather as he presses a kiss against it making his way up to your ear where you hear his voice rasp out something that shuts your mind off immediately and you relax into him.

“My Good Girl.”

Tom Riddle may not be a gentle lover, but he knows his way to keep you wanting more.

[shiftingwithmars]

Imagine Mattheo getting upset and he just starts cursing in Parsletongue😭

[rypnami]

mc ask/tag game!

my turn to do an mc ask! answer as you please <3 30 questions wow!

1) if your mc was an animagus, what would their form be? if they are, what is their form?

2) if they could choose what animagus form they would take, would it be the same? or would they want to have a different animal form?

3) does your mc have a favourite colour? why is it their favourite?

4) in a modern au, would your mc use social media? what would their preferred platform be? why is if their preferred one?

5) did you consult wand lore when choosing their wand? if so, why did you pick what you did? if not, would you ever change wand details to match your mc?

6) what is your mc’s diet? are they vegan, vegetarian, do they eat whatever? why?

7) what is your mc’s backstory as to why they didn’t join hogwarts until 5th year? or did you retcon that part of the story when creating them?

8) what house is your mc in? why are they in that house?

9) were you inspired by characters from other media when making your mc? if so, which characters? and how did they influence your mc?

10) does your mc have any special abilities? (legilimens, parsletongue, metamorphagus, etc) how do they choose to use these powers? did you give them powers for fun, or does it relate to their backstory/plot?

11) what is your mc’s blood status? how does it affect their time at hogwarts? how does it affect their home life?

12) did your mc open the repository? why or why not?

13) if your mc opened the repository, how did absorbing all that power affect them, if it did at all?

14) what does your mc think of the keepers? do they trust them? why or why not?

15) how does your mc’s story continue after 5th year? how do they cope with everything that happened with ranrok, sebastian, etc?

16) did your mc learn the unforgivables? why or why not?

17) did your mc turn in sebastian? why or why not?

18) what is your mc’s family like? do they have siblings? do they still have parents?

19) does your mc have a love interest? who is it? why did your mc fall for that character, if they do have a love interest?

20) does your mc have a favourite spell? if so, what is it and why do they like it the most?

21) if you could change anything that the mc does in the game, what would it be? why would you change it? how would you change it? (ie; a line they say, an event of a quest, things of that nature)

22) does your mc have any pets? if so, why do they have the pets they have? and for fun, what are their pets’ names?

23) when designing your mc, why did you choose the appearance you did? has it changed at all since you first made them? would you change anything now?

24) where is your mc from? where is their family from?

25) what is your mc’s favourite season? why is it their favourite?

26) how about your mc’s favourite holiday? what makes it special to them?

27) if your mc wasn’t in their current house, where would they have been sorted? why do you think they’d be there?

28) does your mc have a favourite childhood toy? if so, what was it? do they still have it with them?

29) what kind of music would your mc like? is there a reason?

30) last but not least, just tell us something you love about your mc!

[hollowed-theory-hall]

You know what fucks with me? Is it ever like actually fully explained how in the Deathly Hallows, Ron and Hermione get into the Chamber of Secrets by themselves. Is Parseltongue just a language people can learn now? Did they make Ron retroactively a Parselmouth too? Or is the chamber dumb enough that you can do the snake equivalent of meowing back at a cat at it and it'll go 'seems legit'

Another one for the 'what the heck happened to the writing in this book' pile maybe

Honestly, yes, that was so contrived, and for, like, no reason.

I mean, the explanation in the book is this:

“But how did you get in there?” he asked, staring from the fangs to Ron. “You need to speak Parseltongue!” Ron made a horrible strangled hissing noise. “It’s what you did to open the locket,” he told Harry apologetically. “I had to have a few goes to get it right, but,” he shrugged modestly, “we got there in the end.”

(DH, 623)

So, it's exactly a person meowing back at a cat, you're spot on with that description. It's so bad Harry doesn't actually recognize it as words in Parsletongue the way he always does, because Ron isn't speaking it! He isn't actually saying anything, just hissing randomly!

Which makes it bizarre the chamber actually opened to him like this. Seems like either loose security, some contrived magic helping Ron out or he was very lucky. Honestly, I prefer to believe he got the hissing lucky that one time, it seems more probable than the other options.

JKR did state in an interview Dumbledore learned Parsletongue, or at least, knew to understand it when spoken to him, but I don't treat it as canon. It doesn't make sense with everything we know about Parseltongue as a magical language, the way speakers of it just hear it as English, Harry has to strain for a moment to realize it's a different language (he can tell in the memories in book 6 if he listens carefully). Also, Dumbledore seems to me in these memories he's showing Harry like he doesn't understand the Parsletongue. And as I take the books' texts over the interviews when it comes to evidence, I don't believe he can and I chose to believe you can't learn Parsletongue and Ron got really lucky with one of his attempts to mimic Harry.

All in all, it seems she just decided you could learn Parsletongue in book 7 and ran with it. I don't even know why, since, like, it wasn't necessary? There were plenty of pages she could've replaced with Harry going down to the chamber considering how much time is spent on very little, well, anything. And if she really didn't want to add that scene it could've been an invisible scene like: "Harry opened the Chamber for Ron and Hermione to retrieve basilisk fangs,"

Like, I get wanting to give Ron a win, but he gets wins, he destroyed the locket and there are other ways to give him wins that don't include changing the very rules of magic.

Book 7 annoys me from an analysis standpoint, it makes theorizing harder instead of easier sometimes and it frustrates me so much more than the frankly bizarre writing choices. Although they bother me too, especially the pacing and structure of the book, but that's a whole rant on its own.

[annionebutme]

Time travel fic where Harry/tom (or Harry/V) are brought backwards into an alternate universe where their alt selves just can't get over their own bullshit enough to bring themselves to be together. The loving couple are more annoying than helpful.

---

T/V: Was I ever that un-fun? Harry likes fun. Too much evil is boring. You can still do evil as long as you ensure Harry is entertained by dates and kidnappings.

----

T/V: I was swayed by your ability to see me as I truly am and your desire to thwart me at every turn. I was overwhelmed by the urge to bring you under my heel.

H: You're hot and the sex was amazing. (To past T/V) Bring him under dick, not under heel.

T/V: And it evolved to...

H: Uhhhh... You're nice to me sometimes?

T/V: Noises of annoyance.

H: (to past H) Our bar is like, really low.

T/V: (to past T/V) It really is. Take advantage of that.

----

Past T/V and H on a date. Future T/V spend the entire time whispering advice into their alt selves ears. It's very ineffective.

They decide to switch next time. It's just as ineffective.

Bonus: they are intentionally giving their past selves shitty advice mixed in with actual advice. Because it's fun.

---

Harry annoys/offends his past self with talking about the sex as if it's the only things that matters. Tom/Voldemort annoys/offends his past self by casually revealing his emotional traumas.

---

Ohhhhh or past Tom but future Voldemort

T to his Harry: Oh, so the reason you're not falling for my charms is because you're into weird shit.

H: It's because you're not charming.

---

Bonus points for them teaching their past selves "The Draco Game".

Goal: Make Draco Malfoy jizz his pants by speaking parsletongue into both ears at once. They use fairy tales, instruction manuals, text books, recipes, never anything sexual.

Draco does not like the Draco Game.

D: I can see why you're together. You deserve each other.

Both beaming with pride: We really do.

---

[sheeple]

Miracles don't exist | 15: Like hot coals

Genre(s): Riddle!reader / Slytherin!reader / kinda slowburn / little happy moments Fandom(s): Harry Potter Pairing(s): Theodore Nott x Reader / Harry Potter x Riddle!reader Summary: Being the Dark Lord's daughter and raised under the strict supervision of the Malfoy's is no easy life. Especially if you start crushing on your father's arch-nemesis, Harry Potter. And that while being engaged to one of his follower’s sons. Warning(s): Smooching / reader is one angsty bitch who loves self-punishment [Masterlist] [Mini masterlist] [Playlist]

The days grow shorter and the temperature drops significantly. And before you know you have to go back home for Christmas. You've been dreading the moment and you look like shit. The DA lessons are also not going in your favour.

As Harry dismisses the class, his eyes meet yours and you understand that he's asking you to stay behind. You move towards the mirror and study the group picture of the Order. They were all so young. And Voldemort killed most of them. Or driven them insane.

Once everybody cleared out of the Room of Requirement, having said their goodbyes and Christmas well wishes, it's only Harry and you. He goes to stand next to you. You see in the reflection that he wants to touch you and comfort you in some way or another. But instead, he drops his hand back to his side.

Turning around, you swallow. "I'm scared to go back, Harry. He's at the Malfoy Manor." It comes out as a hiss, dangerously teetering close to Parsletongue. "And they will be there, revelling in their... doings and I-"

Your breath hitches in your throat as the first tears start to fall. The ones you've been holding back for so long but couldn't find a moment to let go. 

Harry grabs your hands, giving them a squeeze. He reaches and wipes away a tear from your cheek, his hand lingering on your cheek. He knows you mean Voldemort. But you yourself are not sure if you only mean Voldemort, or also Theodore.

In your heartbreak and loneliness, you lean into Harry's touch. You haven't let anyone touch you like that since the day you received the Mark. You always felt like he was lingering in the back of your mind.

But Harry... He's like you- almost. He also bears a mark that Voldemort left behind on his soul. He's already on the Dark Lord's kill list, so he wouldn't be in more danger with your involvement.

Your touch starved-ness mistakes Harry as a sign he has been looking for, and he presses his lips against yours. The kiss is first soft and unsure. But as Harry cups the back of your head, his finger lacing your hair, the kiss starts to be more serious. It actually forms into a make-out session.

More tears start to pool out of your eyes as you feel guilty towards Theodore. He obviously liked you, and you still like him. But it feels oh so good to have your cheeks cradled like that by Harry. To have someone touch you tenderly without ulterior motives. Your skin aches for that kind of contact. So, selfishly, you cherish every moment of it.

Your hands fist the back of his sweater when the two of you part. As you lean your forehead against him, you close your eyes. His breath hits your face in soft puffs.

"Come with me to Grimmault for Christmas. And summer break. You'll be safe there. And Sirius would love to see you again." A short laugh escapes him. "He's sort of sad that he can't send you any more letters."

You smile sadly. "I can't, Harry. You know the consequences will be too severe if I don't show up." You've already missed Christmas last year, so there is no way your aunt and uncle will let you not attend this year. Especially now that Voldemort is residing in the mansion.

He hums and wants to give your lips another peck, but you stop him. The confused look on his face saddens you.

"We can't", you whisper, "we're supposed to be opposites- enemies."

"You being here means that there is no way you could ever be my enemy."

Oh, Harry... You don't know how terribly wrong you are.

You take a step back and stare at the ground. You wipe away your tears harshly with the palm of your hand. "I'm sorry, I really am. But I'm not the type of girl you need, Harry." You lean one last time closer and give him a lingering kiss on the cheek. "Have a nice Christmas. See you next year."

And with that whisper, you leave the Room of Requirement. Guilt, heartbreak, anger, and anguish swirl through you. And that all the while the Mark on your arm burns like hot coals.

Cold water splashes against your face, smudging your makeup. Staring yourself down in the mirror above the sink, you wipe away the water and mascara that runs down your face.

You fix the sleeves of your floor-length gown. One good thing about winter is that nobody questions why you have a dress with long sleeves. Even though you will be in a room with mostly Death Eaters, you're not too keen on showing off the Mark.

Checking the time, you rush towards the ballroom and stand next to your father. You fix a stray hair before people file in, making their way over to the two of you and bowing to the Dark Lord.

An enchanted orchestra starts to play the first notes of a slow song and the annual Malfoy Christmas ball has officially started. Normally you're allowed to roam around the ballroom, mingle with the guests and pick something to eat before disappearing into the library and spending the rest of the evening there. 

But now you're expected to stand next to Voldemort. Smile and nod whenever you're needed to and overall keep quiet. Silent, agreeable, and well-behaved. Those are the words your uncle told you with a hiss before you were let go to get ready.

You mostly zoned out of the conversations, the anxious energy of the guests starting to get on your nerves. The only time when the guests speak to you is when they ask if you are officially engaged. After all, you're almost at pure-blood marrying age.

At one point you have enough of it all, and you turn towards your father. "May I be excused, my Lord?"

He loftily waves you away and you make your way over to the drinks table. Your feet are killing you from standing around and you are hungry as a hippogriff. 

Making sure you stay in sight of your father, you move towards the table with hors d'oeuvres. You feel a presence behind you and turn around. Mr Nott looks at you with a wide smile. Behind him stands Theodore, his eyes boring into your own.

"Miss Black — or I should say Riddle — you look very pretty." The compliment gives you the ick but you smile politely. "My son would be honoured to take you to dance." 

The elder man pushes Theodore towards you. He holds out his hand for you to take. You make eye contact with Voldemort. And after the faintest of nods, you take Theodore's hand. He leads you towards the middle of the dance floor and a waltz starts to play.

Neither of you says something until the dance is almost done. You anxiously fiddle with your fingers from the hand that lays on Theodore's shoulder.

"You really do look beautiful." 

Your eyes flicker towards his – which are already trained on you. "Thank you", you whisper, a faint smile growing on your face.

As Theodore twirls you around, he catches a glimpse of Voldemort. "So, Riddle huh?"

Your stomach knots together at the last name and you nod. "Yeah... I prefer Black though. Feels less... evil?"

"Is that also the reason you've been ignoring me all school year?" Theodore's voice and face is void of all emotions, cold and indifferent.

It feels like he has driven a knife through your heart. You can handle hurt. You can handle anger. But cold? The indifference hurts the most. Like he doesn't care about you anymore.

"I just wanted to protect you." Your voice cracks as it comes out in a whisper.

The hold on your hand and middle tighten and his eyes narrow. "Protect me? From what? The Dark Lord? For your information, Riddle, I've grown up with Death Eaters."

You close your eyes, willing away your tears. You can't cry now. It will look pitiful and weak, and the Heir of Voldemort can't look weak. "I- I know, Theodore. I don't want him to hurt you when I am not as obedient as he wants."

"That sounds like a you problem, Riddle." Theodore looks like he's ready to pounce.

But before he can do any more damage, Uncle Lucius raises his glass and taps his wand to it. The guests fall silent and turn towards the white-haired man.

"Esteemed guests, I would like to proudly announce the official engagement of the Dark Lord's heir, (Y/n) Riddle and Theodore Nott. May the line of Salazar Slytherin reign long!"

Taglist (bold means I couldn’t tag you): @the0doreslover @lqndkxlmqma @st4rrry  @choppedpartymuffinwinner @ledtasso @literallyobessed @lestat-whore​ @vanishingcherry @harrysnovia @pietrobae @ireallywannasleep127 @yeolsbubbles @fruityfrog505 @fluffybunnyu @theroyalmanatee @shinrjj

[obsidianpen]

Hermione speaking in parsletongue and the next moment kneeing him in the balls 😂😂

I know my man, Tom was so turned on that he got murderous

the most iconic B&G moment in my personal opinion hahah

[theravenchild]

10 and 25 for MC ask game 🩷

Thank you so much for the ask @esolean! 💕 🫂

10. Does your mc have any special abilities? (legilimens, parsletongue, metamorphagus, etc) How do they choose to use these powers? Did you give them powers for fun, or does it relate to their backstory/plot?

During sixth year, Hellendil made the decision to become an animagus because his friend Mara was struggling with her newly acquired affliction with werewolfism. He wanted a way to keep her company but also to stay safe in doing so, so he undergoes the long process over break.

In his animagus form, he takes the form of a Norwegian Forest Cat, a big fluffy and friendly cat well adapted to the cold winters. Since Hellendil is such an affectionate person and he's limited in ways to be so openly during the Victorian era, he sometimes uses his animagus form to show his affection. No one's going to worry about someone cuddling with a cat, especially since there are so many of them wandering the castle and Highlands.

Hellendil also seems to have an innate ability to connect with animals and creatures. His relatively calm demeanor and desire to help others even if they're not human gives them the room they need to see he's not a threat. He treats them with the respect they demand so they become comfortable with his presence and learn to trust him. He has always felt a special connection with thestrals, but his bond is especially strong with Sepulchria after caring for her injuries and nursing her back to health.

25. What is your mc’s favourite season? Why is it their favourite?

Short answer is Spring, but Hellendil got to answer it fully here. ☺️

Full ask game here.

[saibugslegacy]

Odysseus Ask Game

my fabulous mutual @rypnami posted an ask game for characters and I decided to fill it out for Odysseus to try and force myself to devlope him more lmao

1) if your mc was an animagus, what would their form be? if they are, what is their form?

His patronus is a black mamba but if he was an animagus I think they’d be a dog, specifically a really big pitbull, we’re talking great dane sized pitbull

2) if they could choose what animagus form they would take, would it be the same? or would they want to have a different animal form?

Honestly he’d probably want to be a snake just for a point, but he’d also be okay with the pitbull

3) does your mc have a favourite colour? why is it their favourite?

His favorite color is actually periwinkle, he likes it because it’s softer and different than all the things he’s “supposed” to like. He’s not supposed to like pretty things but he does

4) in a modern au, would your mc use social media? what would their preferred platform be? why is if their preferred one?

Good news I have a modern au in development so ive actually thought about this question. Odysseus would be on twitter mainly and have two accounts, one his verified account (in my modern au his mother is the vice president of the us) and a private one where he mainly talks shit about all the people and htings he has to deal with during the day and is gay about his boyfriends (this includes in a certain au i have with a certain mutual of mine)

5) did you consult wand lore when choosing their wand? if so, why did you pick what you did? if not, would you ever change wand details to match your mc?

I did indeed. Odysseus’ wand is cedar wood and unicorn hair. I chose a cedar wand because it’s noted as choosing shrewd and incredibly loyal wizards, but what really sold it was that the users of cedar wands are often underestimated but incredibly powerful, especially when harm is done to their loved ones. I picked unicorn hair because it’s a very consistent core and he just really needs a steady consistency, if his wand was moody he’d burn down Hogwarts

6) what is your mc’s diet? are they vegan, vegetarian, do they eat whatever? Why?

Not a limited diet but does tend to err more towards “fancier” foods only because that’s what he’s used to. But “simple” foods are comforting to him

7) what is your mc’s backstory as to why they didn’t join hogwarts until 5th year? or did you retcon that part of the story when creating them?

Odysseus didn’t go to Hogwarts because he was a squib. He had ancient magic but couldnt use it until him and his siblings stumbled on an ancient magic hotspot and activated it. Suddenly he could do magic and less than a week later Fig showed up to Carrow manor with a Hogwarts letter for him

8) what house is your mc in? why are they in that house? 

Odysseus is a Hufflepuff because underneath all of the…everything, his core traits are his loyalty to his family and his hard work in order to make his family proud

9) were you inspired by characters from other media when making your mc? if so, which characters? and how did they influence your mc? 

The idea of the Owl came very vaguely from Batman and Spiderman but that was it

10) does your mc have any special abilities? (legilimens, parsletongue, metamorphagus, etc) how do they choose to use these powers? did you give them powers for fun, or does it relate to their backstory/plot?

Odysseus is a born Legilimens! He uses the powers mainly unwillingly, he cant really turn them off. But he can focus them and does so either to communicate with people or for interrogation on his family’s behalf. The powers and the backstory kind came at the same time. I knew I wanted to make a Hufflepuff that subverted expectations but wasn’t sure how to incorporate that. I thought of an MC who “should” be a Slytherin but ended up in Hufflepuff, then why would they be trying so hard, maybe they dont have magic but then how does the ancient magic present itself, and i’d already wanted to make a legilimens

11) what is your mc’s blood status? how does it affect their time at hogwarts? how does it affect their home life?

Odysseus is a pureblood, one of the sacred twenty-eight families. His family are definitely blood purists and from hearing their thoughts about it constantly his own thoughts ended up mirroring theirs because that was how he was “supposed” to think. He had a LOT to unpack once he got to Hogwarts

12) did your mc open the repository? why or why not? 

I’m not sure honestly, I haven’t gotten that far in the story yet. I think he might take some of it and then contain the rest, but im not married to that yet

13) if your mc opened the repository, how did absorbing all that power affect them, if it did at all?

It would basically just make it so they have more of a core since they don’t have a natural magic core of his own and using magic exhausts him

14) what does your mc think of the keepers? do they trust them? why or why not?

Odysseus HATES the Keepers and does not trust them at all, he thinks the whole thing is stupid and he hates how they care so much about the trials over just answering his questions and letting him do the job they want him to do so he can get it over with

15) how does your mc’s story continue after 5th year? how do they cope with everything that happened with ranrok, sebastian, etc?

Sebastian is going to need a major redemption arc with Odysseus, but Ody’s story in 6th year is mainly trying to figure out how to escape his family then deciding no, he needs to take down his uncle and save his family

16) did your mc learn the unforgivables? why or why not?

He did because to him the Unforgivables are just powerful spells, he doesn’t think different until later but by then he already knows them

17) did your mc turn in sebastian? why or why not?

He did not because he did not care about Sebastian killing his uncle, it was the other stuff he had a problem with. Plus, he couldn’t do that to Ominis

18) what is your mc’s family like? do they have siblings? do they still have parents?

cracks knuckles alright buckle up buttercup. His father, Fabian, died when odyssesus was young because he was an auror and their house got attacked by dark wizards. Odysseus’s uncle Magnus became the head of the family until Ody’s brother Theodore could come of age who at the time of the game is only. Magnus already hated Ody because he was a squib, then he came out and Magnus hated him more because Odysseus being treated as a man would put Magnus’ position as head of family in danger even sooner. Ody’s mother’s name is Yvaine, she was a Lestrange before marrying into the Carrows. Ody also has three sisters, an older sister names Ambrosia who marries Professor Black’s son Cygnus, and despite being an arranged marriage they are grossly in love. Then there’s Vivian, who is 14 and a Slytherin, and little Marianna who is 9 

19) does your mc have a love interest? who is it? why did your mc fall for that character, if they do have a love interest?

At this point ody has about 734638 love interests but his main one is phillip ( @rypnami ) or maybe Poppy

20) does your mc have a favourite spell? if so, what is it and why do they like it the most?

I dont think he really has one honestly, if he did it would probably be diffindo, it’s brutal and efficeient

21) if you could change anything that the mc does in the game, what would it be? why would you change it? how would you change it? (ie; a line they say, an event of a quest, things of that nature)

MC is WAY too nice and empathetic to be Odysseus honestly but other than that not much

22) does your mc have any pets? if so, why do they have the pets they have? and for fun, what are their pets’ names?

He has a rosy boa snake named Persephone who is a massive diva and has a rivalry with Ominis over Odysseus’ attention, and a horned owl named Merlin who does not want to be here and just wants to do his job

23) when designing your mc, why did you choose the appearance you did? has it changed at all since you first made them? would you change anything now?

I wish his eyes could be a brighter purple but otherwise I like him as is. I kinda just followed my heart and clicked things till i made a pretty boy

24) where is your mc from? where is their family from?

Carrow manor is in Ireland and partially from india while his mother’s side of the family is from france

25) what is your mc’s favourite season? why is it their favourite?

Odysseus likes winter because everyone stays inside so he can go outside and get some peace and quiet

26) how about your mc’s favourite holiday? what makes it special to them?

He likes christmas because when he was a kid it was the only time he got to see Ominis and they could actually spend time together, unlike the social events they were dragged to where they had to mingle and such

27) if your mc wasn’t in their current house, where would they have been sorted? why do you think they’d be there?

He still wouldn’t be a Slytherin unfortunately for him, he would be a Ravenclaw. He learned so much about things like potions, herbology, and magic theory so he wouldnt be as much of an embarrassment and that takes a lot of cleverness

28) does your mc have a favourite childhood toy? if so, what was it? do they still have it with them?

Before he came out he had a little music box from his mother. His uncle threatened to take it but Odysseus buried it where the ancient magic hotspot was 

29) what kind of music would your mc like? is there a reason?

Classical. He will never admit this because he has a hard enough time being taken seriously as a man but he adores dancing, mainly ballet and ballroom dancing, so thats why he likes classical. He’s particularly fond of the violin

30) last but not least, just tell us something you love about your mc! 

I fucking love his eyes I wish I could make them look right in game. I will attach a picture below

[anomalyaly]

10 and 11 for Elsie?

Thank you for the ask!

10) does your mc have any special abilities? (legilimens, parsletongue, metamorphagus, etc) how do they choose to use these powers? did you give them powers for fun, or does it relate to their backstory/plot?

Nothing besides ancient magic - I think Elsie's a little overwhelmed with having discovered she has magic in the first place! Adding ancient magic to the mix made it even harder to adjust. But once she learns to wield it, she becomes very confident in her abilities (perhaps a little too confident). Maybe someday she'll learn to be an animagus when she's conducting her research, but for now, she wants to learn more about what her current abilities entail.

11) what is your mc’s blood status? how does it affect their time at hogwarts? how does it affect their home life?

Elsie is a muggleborn. She was born in London and both of her parents are muggles with no knowledge of magic. She noticed the prejudices immediately upon meeting Professor Black, so she tries to avoid bringing up her family in conversation just in case someone shares the same views.

(slight spoiler for my story) It's strained her home life - her brother, whom she used to be close with, tends to tread more carefully around her. Her parents had plans for her to be married off to another rich family, so they feel like their best laid plans have been foiled. They don't know what to make of the magic culture either. The only one who doesn't seem bothered by it is her sister, who is too young to really understand. The differences between muggles and wizards are stark!

[hollowed-theory-hall]

Hi! Idk if you’ve already spoke about this so sorry if you have but do you think that Harry can still speak parsletongue after he’s no longer a horcrux? And do you have any hcs about if theres any changes before vs after he’s no longer a horcrux?

Hi 👋,

Like, in canon, I don't recall it ever being mentioned in the books. But JKR did state in an interview he lost the ability to speak Parseltongue:

Nigel: Can harry speak parseltongue when he is no longer a horcrux? J.K. Rowling: No, he loses the ability, and is very glad to do so.

(Source)

The books don't really mention it, but they intend you to understand it as Harry not being able to speak Parseltongue anymore.

Personally, I like to headcanon he still can. Since it isn't book canon, but stated in an interview, it's pretty loose in canonicity.

Like, my headcanon regarding Harry's Parseltongue is that he wouldn't have been able to speak it if he didn't have a latent gene for it. Like, if a random wizard that had no recent enough Gaunts in their family tree to have the potential to be Parselmouths, became Voldemort’s Horcrux they wouldn't be Parselmouths. Like, I headcanon Lily's maternal grandma was a squib from the Gaunt family, and that's why Harry had a dormant Parseltongue gene that was just activated by becoming a Horcrux. So, he'd keep the ability after the Horcrux is no longer there since it just triggered a gene that was already there. I already talked about how most muggleborns are likely descendants of more recent squibs, so it's not only possible Lily has relatively recent magical ancestry, but likely (also, she has Slytherin green eyes, and was the one to really kill the Heir of Slytherin the first time, let her be a Gaunt).

I think Harry would feel weird after the Horcrux is no longer there. Lighter than he ever felt before. He'd think it's because the war is over and there aren't dark lords or Durlseys to mess with his life, but it isn't. His life likely is still quite stressful while rebuilding the wizarding world, and I think, he'd realize eventually the horcrux left him a little emptier. I think the moment he buries Voldemort and his wand would be the moment he realizes how much he feels the lack of the Horcrux.

I mean, imagine you have a certain amount of soul in you your entire life. Your body, your mind, your spirit, your own soul and magic, the very essence that is you, has recognized another as part of itself, got used to having more soul between your ribs than just your own. and then, in practically a blink of an eye, it's gone. I can't imagine you won't feel it. Like a phantom limb.

I don't think Harry's personality changes much after the Horcrux is removed. Like, I don't think his magic or the allegiance of his wand would be affected by that. I think he'd be fine on that front. I think he'd just feel lighter. Emptier. I think his magic would be a bit off balance in the first few months until he got used to the new balance of his body and soul. And he'd just feel off. Like when you leave your house and you have the feeling you forgot something and you just don't know what — that, but constantly, and about your own soul.

I think the entire journey could be really fun in a fic that uses the loss of the Horcrux as a way to explore Harry's trauma from the war now that it's all over. He feels lighter, the weight he carried all his life is gone, but it leaves him empty and purposeless. That's why I think he would go back to 8th year — back home to find his balance.

[ragana62]

Saturday Hot Takes:

We’re double dipping today because why not start things off right?

Requests for clarification or elaboration are always welcome. You know where to find me, and my anonymous asks are on if you’re feeling shy.

This time, we’ve got some thoughts on the Chosen One himself: the man, the myth, the often forgotten or ignored by his own fandom, Harry Potter.

He doesn’t actually need the glasses by the time he reaches adulthood. Magic can in fact fix eyesight and for Aurors in particular it’s a bit mandatory to have it done as a safety precaution. He wears them regardless, just without prescription lenses, because it’s something of his father that he can keep with him even after so many of the ‘you look just like your dad’ comments stop.

That said, he doesn’t actually stick with being an auror very long. It was an impulse decision after the war, made mostly out of a feeling of obligation to finish what he’d started, to make sure that this time the victory stuck and they’d not have to do it all again in another 15 years or so. The second the last of the Death Eaters is in Ministry custody, his badge is on Kingsley’s desk. A part of him wants to be a professor, but he doesn’t technically have the NEWTs to qualify since he skipped his repeat year, but a bigger part of him discovers he rather loves being at home with the kids and since he doesn’t really need to work thanks to that family fortune of his, he spends most of their childhoods as a stay at home parent.

Ginny loves bragging to her friends, teammates, the papers, anyone who is stupid enough to comment on it, that Harry Potter is her trophy husband. It’s all in good fun, he’s into it, and it does lead to some rather entertaining articles, and a brief trend of other men trying to show off their status by proclaiming themselves trophy husbands even if they don’t quite get the joke. Hermione had the article where Draco is quoted as saying that not only is he a trophy husband but he’s from a long proud line of trophy husbands so really Potter’s just copying him framed for Harry for his birthday for the laugh. It’s one of his proudest possessions.

Harry never replaced Hedwig. It was inconvenient, not having an owl of his own, but he could always borrow one or use Ginny’s and it never felt right. He did however have a string of increasingly odd pets after the war courtesy of an article Hermione gave him about therapy dogs. While he started off normal enough with a kitten, it quickly escalated to filling the garden with odd animals Luna found and declared weren’t able to live in the wild any longer, including a mooncalf named Meep who had been exiled from his herd, an augurey named Helen who had a fondness for trying to scare unknown houseguests with fake portents of doom instead of the usual weather reports, a salamander named Turtle by a rather enthusiastically wrong baby Al, and a snake he found one morning all on his own while watering the garden who officially goes by Gerald. His actual name is a bit hard for anyone who doesn’t speak parsletongue to say, but he and Harry are seen most mornings chatting as Harry tends the garden, usually followed by the rest of his menagerie.

[coldgoldlazarus]

Listening to The Shrieking Shack podcast and it's reminding me how often "the rest of the student body turns against Harry for some reason or another" winds up being a plot point, (Chamber of Secrets because of the parsletongue stuff, Goblet Of Fire because of him getting added to the tournament, Order Of The Phoenix because of all the stuff with the Ministry, and I'm pretty sure there was something in Half-Blood Prince too, right?) and just, given JKR's very evident persecution complex despite her insane wealth, I wonder if there's some connection.