#parental neglect tw
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a timeline of misery, starring darius chulanont.
1980.
YOU WERE LOVED, ONCE.
came into the world branded a miracle after three souls tried. after hours and years and thousands of dollars spent to keep you viable and alive. all of this will one day be snapped at you in bitter resentment and you will come to wish none of it had never been wasted on you.
for now, though, they are only reasons to love you more. prodigal son, inheritor of legacy, momentary adoration of your parents, your life is planned out for you. there's nothing to worry about.
1987.
seven is an important age. this is the year you almost have a sister.
this is, of course, not meant to be. what, did you think you might have a chance at companionship? silly boy. the loss hits your parents the hardest. your mother wanted a girl more than anything in the world. you sit at the too - large dining table as they yell at one another. you sit on the couch as they yell at each other in the kitchen, uncaring that their voices carry through the mansion you call home. you sit outside their bedroom and listen to them yell at each other. their grief and anger engulfs them and leaves you stranded. the only thing that seems to unite them is the idea that you are not enough.
every time your parents brush past you, you wonder if they've ever looked your way. because they hadn't, not really : seven years of trying for just one more, eyes set towards the future, the shine of a miracle son rotting into old commodity. they've always sought out the new, the best. your father will tell you, one day, why settle for a prototype when you can upgrade? and you always wonder if he thinks the same of you.
1994.
you hate disney world.
the problem is your mother loves it, and the drive's not that far, and if your father loves anything it's pleasing your mother ( isn't that the only reason you even exist? certainly, he's made it clear his love for you is conditional. even at fourteen you're aware. ), so you have to go. but every time you do, your gaze shifts to the other families. the way they laugh or cry or scold one another. there's a bond, there. yelling at your kid for running off means you were paying attention to your kid. no one's ever noticed when you disappear.
your disney family trips are as follows : you head in to whatever park your mother wants to visit. your father gives you an allowance for the day. before, you'd have to meet with them at the end of the day at the entrance, but now that you're older the instructions are to head to the hotel by a certain time ( has to be by a certain time, 'cause once you took too long and they left you to sleep outside ). and then they let you do whatever you want, by yourself.
most magical place on earth nothing but a reminder of the chasm between you and your parents, growing deeper and deeper as you morph into something they don't want. too loud, too mouthy, too reckless, too much. so, yes, you're a little fucking bitter at the mouse, 'cause at least at home you can pretend everything is normal.
you flip off the castle and for a moment feel content.
1998.
the big argument comes when you're eighteen.
" what, " when your father uses that tone, it's like ice freezes all over you. that's his you're such a fucking disappointment voice. " you think you can just do whatever you like? we raised you. you know how much we spent to have you? what your mother went through? the least you can do to pay us back for putting up with you is go to college. "
college where they wanted. ivy league, business or finance major, job lined up the moment you graduate and maybe a wife lined up, too, the way your parents work. the thing is you wouldn't mind going to college, but you want to study something useless like literature, and that just isn't enough.
( but what you really want is to just disappear. find something you're good at. get in a fast car and drive. )
they're looking at you, for once, your father with disgust and your mother with that endless pity, the kind you give a stranger with a sad story and not your son. their only son. doesn't that mean something? shouldn't that be enough to will this argument away? shared blood should mean to be loved, right?
the argument escalates.
the breaking point is this : you crack and ask if they love you. your mother's eyes go soft and condescending at once. you imagine that's what a dog might see before it's put down. " we love you, darius. you just make it difficult. "
you pack a bag and leave that night. they never report the car you take as stolen. maybe your leaving was a mercy for all three of you.
2004, PRE-SPLIT.
family is not blood. family is the rosarios, from matias' arm slung over your shoulder to the aunts bothering you at the cookout. family is you and sinn plotting some bullshit, and you helping jihoon fix up a car, or helping mirae practice her turns, and it's bothering jaeha, and racing against cutthroat or rome. and it's mabel falling asleep on your chest, it's the feel of sand under your feet and the sound of the waves reaching the shore. it's knowing you belong every time you slip into lucky silver and win a race. it’s the little arguments you and harvey get into that have emanuel getting headaches. it's the quiet affection when you catch yourself speaking to cólas knowing he's somewhere you'll never reach him again. it's xile slotting against you, her hand in your hair, and the feeling of forever when you kiss her.
AND THEN, THE SPLIT. AND THEN, THE CRASH.
don't worry, boy. misery hasn't forgotten your company. don't worry, boy. luck will make sure you live to endure it.
2005.
ghost boy, haunted house. you walk the halls of your childhood home with meaningless aim. it's a constant, again, your father's disappointment and your mother's pity. history's said to move in vicious circles : you just hadn't expected it to be so literal. days turn cyclical, one after the other. your father yells and your mother yells but never at you, because they're back to ignoring you, and you can't really bring yourself to be anything but empty. you sit in the garage daily, trying to see if you might be able to force yourself to drive. what do you call a thing that found its belonging and had it ripped away?
the second time you leave, it isn't like the first. there's no big argument. it's just that you are so tired of feeling nothing, and they are so tired of the reminders of you. a mutual agreement, almost amicable, if this wasn't a story of parents and child : your father drives you back down to miami, leaves you a car at your request ( though it stays with you, his haunting timber of " why? you can't even drive the damn thing. " ). the thing is that you were simply running away back then.
this time, you're running towards something.
2007.
the past will never come back. this, you've forced yourself to learn. but new beginnings can always blossom. the sun still rises whether you're stuck in 1990 or 2001 or the present. so, here you are : old new you, rodani racer turned nariza model. so, here you are, with a new definition of family : you forge it with your arm looped against marigold's, by teasing malai at the shop, by letting sloane patch you up. getting into nory's car or ( sometimes, secretly ) tania's. it’s the blood spilled between you and julian, cigarettes shared between you as a momentary peace offering. it's looks shared between you and ava. it’s you still bothering jaeha, and newly bothering imani. it’s the glances you and harvey give one another every time you’re alone, acknowledgements of being two halves of an incomplete whole. it's every race where you sit and watch instead of participate.
and the rosarios, of course, because they're your real family. bond that can never be undone, another son slotted in by force of will. you might change, but your love for them never will. because you know no matter how many times you run, unlike your blood family, they'll be waiting for you. always.
the past will never come back. you will never get to undo being a disappointment. to your parents, to the prowlers, to the ones you consider to be a home. but you can go forward. you can build something new.
#MISCARRIAGE TW#car crash tw#parental neglect tw#depression tw#crazy tags omfg maybe i do need to be nicer to him#DARIUS HC.
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「 ₊ ☆ ゚ kathryn newton, cis woman, she/her 」 INCOMING TEXT: omg hv u met SAVANNAH GRADY of the NARIZA BOIS yet ? they’re one of the crew’s street racer n actually go by PEACH. the twenty five y/o is typically seen hanging arnd body. allegedly they’re frm fort valley, georgia n hv been w/ the crew for THREE YEARS. wtvr. just watch out for them, k ? ttyl ! 「 ₊ ☆゚ sarah, 28, she/her, est 」
trigger warning for brief mentions of anxiety, emotional abuse, parental neglect, violence
INTERVIEW
tell the story behind your alias.
"peach," savannah spoke. "not sure if the accent gives it away, but i grew up in the middle of fuckin' nowhere in the south...pretty rural part of georgia," she explains. "when i first started workin' with the bois, my accent was the first thing that stuck out with the rest of the crew. so peach, like georgia peach. but, also like princess peach from super mario bro's and mario kart. i can see the resemblance, y'know....blonde hair and bangs. rosalina is my new favorite character to play though. i don't mind the nickname though, i've been called way worse."
you're often seen around body - what does a typical visit look like for you?
“body's? considering that i work there, most of the time i’m there because it’s for a shift of mine,” she admitted with a giggle. “even when i'm not working, i like to stop by there once or twice a week. i've been working there for a few years now so i'm close with a lot of the girls. i gotta make sure no assholes are giving them problems."
when did your first realize you had a passion for cars / racing?
"well, i kinda grew up around cars. i have fond memories of helping my grandpa fix up some of his old pickup trucks that he loved to restore as a hobby of his. we did together as a way to bond and get closer. i also had a job back home at a shop, " savannah explains some of her past living with her grandparents. "but i think my passion really started after i've seen my first few official races with the cars i've worked on. it was hard work but it felt so satisfying to see all that hard work pay off for a win."
CHARACTERIZATION
character inspirations.
peyton sawyer (one tree hill), jennifer swallows (lisa frankenstein), lane kim (gilmore girls)
playlist.
gypsy - fleetwood mac
one of those girls - avril lavigne
helena - my chemical romance
mini bio.
savannah grew up and spent the bulk of her childhood/teenage years in georgia.
the grady family grew up on a small family farm, with your typical farm animals and crops. her mother was part of a very strict and religious upbringing. this meant going to church multiple times a week, praying before every meal, volunteering in the local community, and not falling victim to anything secular. on paper, they seemed like the perfect 'white picket fence' family in their rural town.
unfortunately, savannah's mother got involved with a guy who was quite the opposite of her and a bad influence towards her. young and dumb and in love, she'd become pregnant at seventeen, her parents not approving of the situation and strongly pushing their daughter towards putting her child up for adoption. their reasoning? they wanted their daughter to have a bright and successful future and raising a baby too? that would simply be too much in their eyes.
determined to prove them wrong, her mom would be stubborn as a mule and opt out of signing off on any adoption papers. an explosive fight would result due to this, causing many nasty words to be thrown towards all family members and her mother packing up her belongings and getting the hell out. done with the toxicity of the grady family dynamic, she would rather struggle her way through motherhood than be forced to be around her parents any longer.
moving a few hours away from fort valley, the young couple would try their absolute hardest to raise little savannah. the stresses of being broke and having no other support would lead to their relationship crashing and burning by the time savannah was four.
that is when savannah would begin living with just her mother. things for the two of them would only grow more difficult, but sav's mom would vow that she wouldn’t leave her side.
it was not out of the ordinary for them to frequently be evicted from whatever apartment or duplex they were living at, being forced to flee for temporary housing. savannah had many different “definitions” of home. this often would vary from a friend’s place, homeless shelter, or whatever beater card they had. in spite of their struggles, she never fully resented her parents, knowing that they always were trying to provide for her the best they could.
savannah was seven years old when her mother would lose custody of her. it was shortly after her birthday, a memory that would forever be ingrained in her mind. savannah and her mom had been living in a motel room for the past few months. It had been paradise in comparison to the shelter that they had been staying at. they had lucked out, her mom getting a job as a housekeeper there, the owner learning about their situation and taking pity on them. he'd agree to offer them discounted rent if she’d promise to not be disruptive. It seemed like a perfect opportunity for them to get back on their feet and try to get a little more ahead.
in order to make some extra income, savannah's mom had gotten a second job a few nights a week as a waitress at an overnight diner. through her work, she’d start to become involved with a regular. he was a bit of a seedy individual, someone that would ultimately be a very negative influence on her.
one night, her mother invited her boyfriend over to their motel to spend the night, savannah being watched by someone a few rooms down. she would get extremely under the influence, inviting a few other "friends" of theirs, resulting in their motel room getting destroyed and causing a hell of a scene. the police were called and her mom was arrested. the courts would deem her unfit to continue raising little savannah, full custody being placed with her grandparents.
savannah and her grandparent's relationship was rather rough from the get-go. she was angry and confused with her new living situation, not wanting to live with someone she’d never met before. she was desperately missing her mom, not quite at an age where she could understand why she’d been arrested. so , it wasn’t much of a shock when savannah gave them hell from the start.
savannah always struggled with breaking out her shell and making friends, mostly due to moving around so much. her grandparents tried their best with introducing her to many groups within their community (their church, girl scouts, 4-h club, etc)....anything to try to help savannah blossom and try to ease the transition to her new living situation. she would manage to make a few friends, people would most likely took some pity on her. but, she would found more comfort with her own company. her biggest comfort? music. it all started when she was nine and hearing rumors by fleetwood mac on her classmate's cd player. after hearing gold dust woman, savannah commented on the song and saying she enjoyed it. her classmate let her borrow a few of her other cd's and sav felt like she was discovering gold. there was no turning back, she wanted to learn more, discover more music. this started her journey of discovering more artists/bands, the first taste of rebellion. at the same time, she felt like she was living a double life since this wasn't music they played at church?
as savannah transitioned into her pre-teen years, her rebellion and bad habits only grew. she would find her confidence and comfort with hanging out with the small crowd of misfits of peach county high. the misfits being the goths/punk/burnout kids aka the the people that didn't fall into any other so called 'cliques'.
secular music was not the only thing she was doing behind her grandparent's back. she was also sneaking cigarettes, weed, booze, and skimpy clothing to wear on her late night adventures. hiding them all in a loose floor board of her bedroom, there was no going back.
at fourteen and fifteen years old she was spending late nights sneaking off and causing chaos. chain smoking cigarettes, shop lifting, finishing off full bottles of vodka, and god knows what else. savannah knew deep down that none of these things were good to do, but she was so desperate for a place to fit in and be accepted that she was heavily influenced to do these things. half the time her grandparents didn’t know where was and it made them worried sick.
her reckless behavior would only fuel their negative relationship but she didn't care. this was the root cause for the standard occurrence of them having heated verbal arguments, causing savannah to be temporarily kicked out and being forced to couch surf with her friend group. her grandparents wanted better for savannah, trying to hold her accountable and not have a future like her mom.
when she was seventeen, she got into a nasty fight with another girl at a club while she was extremely drunk and under the influence. the fight resulted in the girl being hospitalized with a serious blow to her head. sav was sent to juvie for a year and a half due to the fight and other charges that were caught up on her.
flash forward 1.5 years, she is released from juvie and put on probation. with nowhere else to go, she had no choice but to move back in with grandparents. even though they are not proud of her past actions, they let her move back in but not without their own rules for her to obey.
she picks up a job at the local mechanic shop in town at the front desk. it's nothing fancy but it is something to keep her busy and get cash in her pocket. she had managed to get her GED while locked up, so college was an option but something that wasn't on her radar.
by the time she is twenty one, she has managed to save up enough money to feel like she can be on her own. only having only known georgia, savannah craves somewhere else she can start fresh and have more 'wordly' experiences. so, she finds herself moving down to miami without much of a plan but she'll figure it out.
found a shitty but cheap apartment not far from her bartending job at body's....eventually moving up to becoming a dancer there after being there for around a year.
she started out with the nariza bois as a mechanic, her knowledge of cars from her previous mechanic job and helping fix cars with her grandpa making it a natural fit. she felt comfortable in that position.
most recently transitioned to becoming a racer and though she had her own self doubts if the choice was right, the pure adrenaline and confidence boost it has provided her is priceless. every time she goes out on a race, it brings her back to her teenage years, her thirst for excitement and rebellion never quite leaving her.
other hc's / fun facts.
she has a THICK southern accent <33
keeps her ipod nano charged at ALL times and her playlist is hella chaotic....but mostly ranges from classic rock / emo / alternative
drives a refurbished 60's mercury comet convertible (decked out w purple interior and purple and blue stars painted on the exterior ) .... it is nicknamed the hearse mobile gjrkgjkrj
an extrovert introvert. she gets along with the bois but def has her own inner circle of friends that she feels herself more comfortable with. once you get to know her more and she feels comfy in your presence, she'll open up and be more of her weird self
is a CRANKY bitch if she does not have her morning cigarette and redbull combo
her favorite games to play are mario kart or guitar hero
her favorite candy is sour patch kids
constantly missing her alarm
she is very much a night owl.....please do not make her wake up early </3
#CERTIFIED WEIRDO ..... people in high school thought she was a witch/vampire because of her she did her hair and makeup fekjfjrkgj
her style is very....interesting....it's a mix between punk/whimsigoth/emo???? she thrifts most of her clothing to try to make her own style unique to herself. she draws inspo from stevie nicks, avril lavigne, and joan jett.
speaking of avril....she LOVES her !! currently has hot pink streaks in her hair because avril has them
she has LOTS of tattoos....mostly random stick n' poke one's that she has let her fellow mechanic besties draw on her
wanted connections. ( some ideas can be found here )
the bois member whom she met that introduced her to the crew and got her a position as a mechanic - this can be open to an import model/fellow mechanic/racer - perhaps she helped fix up your muses car and they were impressed with her knowledge of cars???
someone from the prowlers that she has BEEF with - can be one-sided or mutual
a prowlers member who talks shit about her and her hearse mobile and thinks she's a shitty racer <3
a bois member who is her designated passenger during races
bad influence
unlikely friendship
drinking/smoking buds
friends with benefits - current or former
former flings
big brother / little sister friendship
platonic soulmates/besties .... i beg
concert/music buddies ..... sav luvs to go to concerts and jam out
BOI MECHANIC BESTIES!!!!! she luvs her mechanics very much
a boi mechanic that she might have mentored when they first joined/took under her wing?
a boi mechanic that she might have iffy terms with bc they're salty she moved to being a racer?
CO-WORKERS AT BODY!!! i would love co-workers that she vibes with and some that she hates :)))
former clients of her's at body
CURRENT clients at body's ;)))
a body co-worker who acts like a work momma to her
anything else tbh !! always down to brainstorm and think of plots !
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It was nice to take a bath and not feel like she might pass out for once - for the past few days, Val's been feeling majorly under the weather. She was better now and pondering things.
To think that she was a married woman now and a mother - even a short while ago, she would have said it'll never happen for her. But life had a funny way with things.
Growing up with parents who never seemed to parent her much, she learned to take care of herself and not wait for them. It was necessary.
It also led to her going through life on autopilot, sometimes, taking care of everything and everyone around her, fixing problems wherever she perceived them and being a lifesaver for friends who needed one.
But what did she need? She wasn't even sure. Yes, she dated once or twice in college. But those relationships felt almost automatic, which, looking back now, she knew wasn't healthy.
If not for the mental breakdown she had that forced her to quit working at Joja, and not for her parents' behavior that followed, maybe she would still be in that cycle.
Her grandpa leaving her that farm proved to be something that really saved her life. She made great connections in Pelican Town. And found the love of her life.
Sometimes, she was still amazed that Elliott fell for her. Old Val would've friend-zoned him automatically, assuming he was out of her league. But somehow, she was so comfortable around him that they became a family.
Life sure was strange sometimes.
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information
full name: Mabel Azalea Hernández Jiménez (Mabel Hernández).
nickname(s) / goes by: Mabel.
pronouns & gender: cis woman, she/her.
sexuality: bisexual.
birth date: November 10, 1992.
birth place: Scottsdale, AZ.
arrival to merrock: local; arrived in 1997.
housing: the suburbs.
occupation: mechanic.
work place: Takato's Garage.
family: Eduardo (father), Gracie (mother), Ava (grandmother), Manny (grandfather).
relationship status: single.
personality
Even though Mabel is hot headed, impatient, and definitely not a pushover, she generally is a pretty decent person. She likes to have a good time and she appreciates most fun things, whether that means bonfires, solving an escape room, shooting pool or going out downtown. She just tries to live for her enjoyment and do whatever seems reasonable at the time. Vibrant, outgoing and always up for a laugh, she makes friends pretty easily, though they tend to be cursory friendships that don't carry over unless she interacts with them a few more times. Real friends take some time to develop - people that prove they're going to have her back the same way she has theirs. She's also extremely loyal and when you are in her good graces, she's got your back. She's sentimental when it comes to friendships and would fight to keep a fading friendship going. She's funny, outgoing, attractive, and likes attention so she never stays quiet in a crowd. She can be talkative, and luckily she doesn't have a loud speaking voice, but she also doesn't know when to shut her mouth. She's well-meaning usually, but sometimes honest word vomit just spills out. Mabel marches to the beat of her own drum; this can make life quite interesting for the people around her as she's wildly unpredictable and enjoys having an audience to observe her shenanigans.
portrayed by Adria Arjona; penned by Nessa.
full biography / background
triggering / sensitive content warning: mentions of parental neglect, alcohol, drugs, intoxicated driving.
Mabel Hernandez was born on the road. Her parents, two young first-generation immigrants, had both picked up and ran as soon as they turned eighteen. Her father worked as a roadie, touring the world with several different bands. Her mother, who had left uber religious parents behind, was a so called "free spirit" who changed her name to 'sapphire' when she left home and claimed to be a psychic medium and roamed the country on the carnival circuit. They met in a dive bar somewhere in Texas - and thus began their strange and tumultuous relationship that resulted in the existence of Mabel.
Her parents did not have their shit together, in the slightest. Her mother was barely twenty when she met her father, who was twenty-eight at the time. Their relationship was passionate, and the pair were obsessed with each other. For several months, they were hot and heavy - Graciana (her mother's real name) even left the carnival circuit for awhile so they could be together - for six months before the novelty of the relationship wore off and they went their separate ways. Only for Gracie to find out she was pregnant several weeks after. Mabel Azalea Hernandez Jiménez came screaming into the world seven months later in a random hospital in Arizona, and Gracie and Eduardo, even after having several months to let the reality of their situation sink in, still had no idea what to make of the fact that they were now parents. The first few months were filled with frantic calls to their families for help and advice and arguments over everything big, small, or practically nonexistent, a far cry from the somewhat relatively pleasant relationship they had before. As time passed, things never really got better.
They waited and waited, but parenthood never quite fit them like a glove the way their parents said it would. After toughing it out for a few more years thanks to the pestering of Gracie's family, the two made several more attempts at making their relationship work before finally calling it quits for good when Mabel was four. Soon after, she came to Merrock to live with her maternal grandparents. Gracie had come to realize the nomad life wasn't so easy when you were dragging a small child along with you, and she wasn't prepared to settle down. Neither was her father. After a lot of debate, Gracie finally conceded that it might be best for her parents to take her in - so long as she got full access to her whenever she wanted. It was the best agreement for everyone involved, really. Mabel got a stable, loving home to grow up in and her parents had the freedom to wander in and out of her life whenever they wanted.
Living in Merrock was the perfect thing that Mabel needed, as she was with her grandparents who were much more equipped to raise her. In school, Mabel had generally been one of the tamer of the kids in her class. She had a choice few friends and spent of a lot of her time with her nose in a book. She didn't get into trouble at school, rather she was usually one of the teacher's favorites. And then high school came around and all of a sudden she was forced out of the careful shell she had constructed around herself. With that, came a black wardrobe that filled her dressers, motorcycle riding that became her favorite pastime, skipping classes just because she couldn't be bothered to go, hanging out with older students, and trespassing places she shouldn't have been to smoke pot with them. In high school she was average, mediocre, normal - and that was completely fine by Mabel. Her parents never expected much of her, so she never learned to expect much from herself. Her juvenile record is filled with half a dozen minor charges related to alcohol possession, breaking and entering and God knows what else. Her permanent record at school has large notes about her truancy habits and how she almost failed eleventh grade by just not showing up. Even though she was encouraged by her grandparents, Mabel decided to not attend any higher education than high school and she made no efforts to apply for community college. The idea of sitting in a classroom for a few more years for a degree she'd never use just didn't appeal to her. So, she went the reasonable route and started working full-time at Cul-de-Sac, serving delicious food and earning generous tips. And sometimes hiding in the backroom whenever she wasn't on the clock.
Her life was pretty much a series of events in varying orders: work, sleep, eat, do something dumb, screw someone and occasionally try not to get arrested. Over the years, she has had a handful of stints in the drunk tank and one or two charges of assault (though she'd yell until she was blue in the face, that they started it). It wasn't until she got a DUI when things really started to turn around. Her abuelita delivered a blunt lecture at the jail, telling her that she needed to get her act together or she'd be kicked out of the family home. Mabel took the talk to heart - going back to a passion she found at a young age.
Mabel was a tinkerer growing up. She questioned everything about how things worked, and both of her grandparents were always incredibly patient with all of her 'but why' questions. She spent hours with her abuelita, watching as she taught her how to take apart an engine and put it back together, or how to rewire the den for a ceiling fan, showing her how everything worked. Naturally, this inspired a lifelong interest in fixing things. Mabel has always been a hands on girl - especially when it came to school, Mabel always performed best in shop classes, therefore took all of them - and her grandmother's tutelage put her ahead of the game. Ultimately after getting that reality check, Mabel got her certification and began working as a mechanic at Takato's Classic Garage. She'd considered continuing on in school for awhile, taking a mechanical engineer program or something similar, but decided school still wasn't really for her and left it at the certification.
At twenty-eight, after years of trying to save and spending instead, she managed to chalk up enough to move out of the family house. Her first apartment, shared with three hipster potheads, was a total disaster. After putting her roommates vinyl records in the oven (the asshole was debating how they were vastly superior to CD's), she knew it was time to move on. However, the apartment was one of the few places she could afford in Merrock. Turning to the internet, she found a plot to rent at Lupine Lane. Shortly after, she moved into a cleaner place and found a sense of community within the mobile home park. Mabel has settled into Merrock quite nicely on her own, and if she's being completely honest, she hasn't regretted any of her choices and is quite content with the way her life is going for her. But old habits die hard, so she's waiting and wondering when her next lapse in judgement will strike.
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this just in! JAVIER REYES RUIZ has just been spotted in town. Wait. You don’t know who HE is? the FIFTY year old CAPTAIN AT FIREHOUSE 7 has been in town for, like, FORTY YEARS. they’re known to be quite RESTLESS, but being DISCIPLINED seems to balance that out. or maybe it’s the fact that they resemble DANNY PINO. personally, i’d love to know more about them seeing as how they’ve got those MORNING RUNS BECAUSE HE’S ALWAYS UP BEFORE DAWN, PERFECTLY IRONED UNIFORMS, A RINGING IN HIS EARS THAT WON’T GO AWAY, TRYING HIS BEST TO BE A FAMILY MAN, WEARING THE WEIGHT OF THE WORLD ON HIS SHOULDERS vibes. and maybe i’ll get my chance if i hang out around DOWNTOWN long enough!
javier reyes was born and raised in dallas, texas to a stay at home mother and a soldier father.
he grew up very disciplined and with a strong work ethic. jr always looked up to his father and wanted to be just like him.
caused his father’s death, and javi’s mom was never the same after that. the two moved to clearwater for a fresh start. javier ended up being more of the parent than his mom was, effectively raising himself from that point on.
after graduating high school, he knew what he was going to do. at eighteen, jr enlisted in the army, where he spent most of his life going on multiple tours overseas.
after his first tour, jr came home for a bit, which was when he met the man who would later become his fiance. being gay in the military wasn’t really something that was accepted or spoken about, so jr kept his relationship a secret from both his family and his colleagues.
though they never married, jr and his fiance started a family together, welcoming a set of fraternal twins (one girl and one boy) into the world. jr’s best friend donated her eggs to them and biologically, he’s the father to both children.
when the kids were in middle school, jr retired from the military and started training to be a firefighter so he could stay stateside to be with his family.
readjusting to civilian life was hard on jr, and it had an effect on his relationship. though they tried to work things out, all of the years of secrecy and time apart had taken its toll, and by the time their kids were started high school, they were broken up. (their kids are seniors in high school now)
though he’s dated on and off since, jr hasn’t found anyone else he’s wanted to commit to, sticking to casual dating and one night stands to fill the void.
work wise, he’s worked hard and gone through the ranks, becoming the captain at firehouse 7 a few years ago - an accomplishment he’s extremely proud of.
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Merrock Task #25: Your Song
Live Like You Were Dying by Tim McGraw
Someday I hope you get the chance To live like you were dying Like tomorrow was a gift And you've got eternity To think about What you'd do with it What could you do with it What did I do with it? What could I do with it?
Perfect by Simple Plan
Hey, dad, look at me Think back and talk to me Did I grow up according to plan? And do you think I'm wasting my time Doing things I wanna do? But it hurts when you disapprove all along
Magic by Coldplay
Call it magic Call it true Call it magic When I'm with you And I just got broken Broken into two Still I call it magic When I'm next to you
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every now and again, annalise will send postcards to her father from her occasional travels. she has never received anything back.
sometimes i think about this and just cry because it’s just so fucking sad!!! she has such a miserable excuse for a father that even after all he’s done to her, after she had the chance to kill him and chose not to, he still won’t indulge her in the simplest things like sending a letter in the mail or responding to her postcards. the last words she ever spoke to him were asking him to change and even knowing he was losing her for good he still wasn’t receptive and went right back to continue his work without taking any time to consider her request. he never considers her and he never really has, but she still caught herself hoping. when she left he lost his project, but she lost her father. it takes her over a decade to work through all the trauma regarding her father and her childhood, work that’s never truly finished—and even after all of that she’ll still find herself reaching out for a connection she knows isn’t there and won’t amount to anything. she’ll get stellar marks in university or ace a debate and suddenly want to tell him—or when she finally gets through school and gets her first job as a nurse, she’ll have this urge to send him a picture of her receiving her degree. she’ll have an off day at work or maybe she sees something medically strange and she wants so badly to pick up the phone and exchange theories with him. but he was never truly there for her to begin with, why would he start now? and while it’s something annalise has presently come to accept, it’s something she still struggles with every now and again, and every time she’ll have to make herself remember “oh right, that’s not something we do.”
#me: literally wrote her backstory#also me: she deserved better#i hate dietrich fanclub and it’s all me#parental neglect tw#ask to tag /#about: annalise vogel.
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Send 👔 for my muse to talk about their father
"My first real memory of my dad... I was five, and he and my mom were... finishing up junior year of college, I think? They both came home for a weekend before going to New York for some internship, and my dad wouldn't pick me up. Like, physically would not lift me and hold me. I asked him to, because I was five and my nanny was like, 'Nora, go say hi to daddy,' but I remember him just looking down at me like I was some alien.
I think he still looks at me like that sometimes. Sometimes, when I'm feeling real masochistic, I think about what I must look like to him. This kid he didn't want and who could've ruined everything if my family didn't have so much fucking money. I think he thinks about me more in terms of how much I've cost him through the years than anything else.
But what's so fucked about it is that I think he resents me for that, but money's also the only way he's ever known how to show any kind of affection at all. When I finished fifth grade, my dad didn't come to the stupid little graduation they held, but I got one of those little pink plastic Jeeps you can ride around in and a ladybug cellphone. He paid for my rent my first year in New York but only ever called to remind me to forward the bills.
So then it's a double-edge sword, right? He feels like I owe him because of all of this money he's thrown at me. Honestly, so do I sometimes, even though I hate him most days. It's still hard for me to wrap my head around the fact that this guy is the reason I have so many things, but he also wasn't even involved in picking out my name. He and my mom left it up to her parents. See the problem here?"
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Stolas never knew his mother. For all he knows, he's not even sure he has one. Paimon is the only parent he's ever known, and he was not often around, leaving Stolas in the care of the servants around the palace for long swathes of time. He spent more time with his tutors and Mr. Butler than he did with any of his actual family members.
When he was younger, he wondered about his mother, if she existed, quite a bit. What would she have been like? Would things be different if she was still around? Had she decided to leave, or had Paimon made that decision for her? Would she have loved him?
There's part of him that still occasionally asks those questions, but more on Octavia's behalf than his own. Would his mother have helped him make a good life for his daughter? Would she care about her at all? Or would he still be on his own, trying to provide all the love and care for his own child that he'd been denied?
So to say he doesn't really have a relationship with holidays that celebrate mothers is an understatement. He pulled on his mask and went through the motions to celebrate Stella, the way he was supposed to, as part of making sure Octavia had a normal childhood, but for himself, it's just another day on the calendar, another reminder of how alone he was for most of his life.
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I think Mikey’s parents were a bit accidentally neglectful of him, which I think also ties into his desperate need to be acknowledged and recognised. Not that anybody in the same position as him wouldn’t also be deprecate for someone to acknowledge what they’ve done, I just think that it’s amplified even more with Mikey.
I think he had more of an attachment to his mother than father, and would oftentimes cling to her like a puppy when he was much younger. I think his mother just put more emotional investment into him than his father did. His father still loved him though, he just didn’t know exactly how to show his emotions properly as much as someone like his mother did.
I think the neglect happened by pure happenstance, it wasn’t really any of their faults, they were busy with work a lot of the time, sometimes working overtime because their job needed them there that much, often accidentally making false promises they’d be home that night before having to call home to break the news that they’d have to work late again.
They’d oftentimes make accidental false promises on other accounts. Promises to take him places, to cook him dinner that night, to get him something he really wanted. So he’d often be looking forward to something with all his heart only to have it shattered when he realises they didn’t fufill what they promised. It wasn’t like they didn’t have the money to, no, they were more than well off in this regard. It was just pure happenstance. He wishes he could blame them present day, just to have someone to pin the blame on, but he knows it wasn’t their fault, so he really can’t bring himself to.
I’m not sure about the status of his parents in the present day. I’m 99% sure they’re alive?? If they’re doing well is another question in it’s entirety.
#Mandjtv#Team Sky Mikey#Team Sky#tw parental neglect#parental neglect#parental neglect tw#cw parental neglect#parental neglect cw
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setting : on the way to the museum, after the interviews with : coriolanus snow @fatefought
kiran suggests they go together on his own lift to the museum with some other gamemakers, but constantinus has an excuse on the tip of his tongue; it is delivered with an apologetic crinkle of the eyes and a salute as means to say see you soon before hurrying to the exit, where the presidential car awaits. he catches the president and the first lady just before she takes the last step, and with a kiss to his grandmother's hand, then her cheek, connie announces he will be joining his grandparents that night because he just hasn't gotten enough of them between his run from the gamemaker seats to the presidential ones. so he scoots in, comfortably between his grandparents.
"grandsire." coriolanus snow receives a bright smile, as if connie is still that nine year old who's star-struck by a man so imposing like the president (his father always made for poor comparison; cornelius snow only gave his only child the time of the day to drag him around by the neckline like a dog, or to whimper his apologies with glazed eyes); a kiss comes too, to the cheek, still like that good natured boy but constantinus pulls himself away quicker than he had with is grandmother. his grandfather smells of death — the same putrid scent from nadia's mouth as he tried and tried to get her to breathe, to no avail (it surprises him everyday that he withstands this; a weaker person may have succumbed to the never stopping anger, but he is cold. he is a snow, after all, and knows he must bide his time, even if he loathes to kiss and pander to a murderer).
the driver takes off, guiding them to the museum; there will be some extra traffic tonight, with all the extra cars around the city going to the same place, and constantinus sucks on his teeth, his annoyance at caesar flickerman the only thing unconcealed in this car from his part. "did you like the scores this year, grandpa?" he queries, casually, as if he's not truly asking the president if he's decided to rig things this year (sometimes, gamemakers have to yield; usually, that's not disclosed between them all, only plutarch would know, but connie knows that some of those scores were not the ones he voted on).
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information
full name: Elizabeth Janelle Hollbrook
nickname(s) / goes by: "beth" "bethy"
pronouns & gender: cis woman / she/her
sexuality: bisexual
birth date: december 3, 1973
birth place: merrock, maine
arrival to merrock: local
housing: Historical Downtown
occupation: Lawyer
work place: merrock law
family: no
relationship status: single
personality
POSITIVE TRAITS: Loyal, Positive, Protective NEGATIVE TRAITS: Insecure, Overworked HOBBIES: reading, working out, gardening
portrayed by Kathryn Hahn; penned by Amber.
full biography / background
triggering / sensitive content warning: parental neglect.
If you ask Elizabeth about her life in Merrock, she'd say it was normal, (but was it?) All Elizabeth knew growing up was watching her grandfather and her father fight back and forth about politics and who's next term was going to be better and who's policies were better. Of course, it intrigued little Elizabeth because she was a daddy's girl. Elizabeth wanted to do everything her father did.
Her father was a Criminal Lawyer for the city of Merrock, and she enjoyed hearing about his day at work. Her mother, she didn't enjoy it, she hated listening to all the drama about who went to jail or this and that - that day.
Her mother knew how much Elizabeth idolized her father, and she resented her for it. Elizabeth knew that when she got older, she wanted to be just like her father, a lawyer. Her mother did not want that for her; she hated that Elizabeth wanted to subject herself to the violence of the world, so she pushed Elizabeth away. The rejection from her mother didn't phase Elizabeth at all, because she knew she had her father's love to fuel her drive to do what she wanted for her future.
When Elizabeth graduated from High School, her mother wasn't there, was Elizabeth upset? Yes, but the sting of her rejection had long since passed and due to her grade's, she was accepted into Yale later graduating with a Doctorate in Political Sciences, getting recognition from Harvard on her dissertation on ethics, which led Elizabeth to have a full ride scholarship to Harvard Law School.
Elizabeth had always been an intelligent mind thanks to her father. Elizabeth in handy when it came to taking the bar and getting a master's in criminal law, just like her father.
Now, Elizabeth has accomplished more than she had expected she would in her life, but her father had always told her to keep her head forward and in a book and never let anyone stray you from your path to greatness. Elizabeth did something she never thought she'd do to make partner and now everyone thinks of her differently.
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[ emma d'arcy, non binary, they/them ] — spotted in the streets of brooklyn, it’s THEO KENT. they have JUST MOVED into the city, working as a CHEF. the 31 year old will probably be seen around PARK SLOPE a lot, seeing as that’s where they live. people say they can be a bit OVERPROTECTIVE and NEUROTIC, but friends know them to be GENEROUS and KIND. you know for sure you’ve found them when you’ve come across FLOUR ON THEIR CLOTHES, LIPSTICK KISS ON THEIR NECK, A LITTLE BLUE NOTEBOOK. welcome to brooklyn, it’s been waiting for you! — [ nads, 35, gmt-3, she/her, none ]
BASICS
FULL NAME: Theo Kent
FACECLAIM: Emma D'arcy
AGE: 31
DATE OF BIRTH: 31 October 1994
PLACE OF BIRTH: London, England.
CURRENT LOCATION: Park Slope, Brooklyn, NYC
GENDER: non-binary
PRONOUNS: They/Them
SEXUAL ORIENTATION: Bisexual
OCCUPATION: Chef - currently guest chef at various high end restaurants around New York
PERSONALITY
CHARACTER INSPO: Chef Luca (The Bear) - Noah Calhoun (The Notebook) William Thacker (Notting Hill) - Matt Flamhaff (13 going on 30) Jamie Taylor (Bly Manor) Schmidt (New Girl)
THEME SONG: The view from the afternoon - Arctic Monkeys
POS TRAITS: Creative. Flirty. Hard Worker
NEG TRAITS: Neurotic. Overprotective. Dependent
LOVE LENGUAGE: Physical touch. Acts of service
ALIGMENT: Chaotic good.
Biography:
Theo wasn’t a wanted child and they knew that since they were a kid. Their mum had them when she was very young after a one night stand, Theo never knew their father. It was a child raising a child .Their mum sort of blamed them for the life she didn’t get to have even though it wasn’t their fault. They hadn't talked to their mum since they were twenty years old.
Their whole life Theo felt a little different and if it wasn’t for their best friend Imogen, they would have had a hard time through school, but even when she got popular and started to go out with boys, they didn’t drift apart. Of course they didn’t, Theo was madly in love with her and not only that; her family considered them one of their own. It was while spending time at their house that Theo started to be interested in cooking, learning some basics from Imogen’s dad who had a garden full of herbs that Theo helped take care of. .
Once they started uni, they moved out of their respective family homes and into a flat together. Theo suffered watching Imogen date all kinds of assholes while they pinned for her until one night, they got tired of seeing her crying and being treated like shit and told her that if she gave them a chance, they’d treat her right and that they had been in love with her for years.
When they finally got together they were sickeningly cute and inseparable. She was their best food critic and they were her model through uni. They even traveled to Italy together where Theo fell in love with the food and is what they specialized later on in their career.
Theo finally got into an important culinary school, where they were top of their class quickly being the center of attention of their professors. One of them offered to come work with them to Louisiana where they were opening a high end Italian restaurant in their hometown and run it with them. It was their dream and the opportunity of a lifetime but it meant changing theirs and Imogen’s lives completely. Imogen seemed to be on board and they were already planning their move across the pond. Theo was going to ask her to marry them before they left, having shown her family the ring they got her in Italy and getting their blessing. And then one day Imogen decided to break them up, leaving them absolutely no choice but to travel alone to America. Theo was devastated and never got into a relationship again, filling lonely nights with meaningless sex wherever they went and throwing themselves fully into work during the day.
After five years in Louisiana and while engaged to someone else, Imogen showed up at Theo’s restaurant with terrible news from home. Her dad who had raised Theo too, had passed away. She had realized she had been prioritizing the wrong thing all this time and confessed that she never stopped loving them, asking them to take her back. Which Theo did without a second thought. Not without scandal, Imogen finally broke off her engagement only to realize that in a random hook up when she got to the states, thinking Theo had a family, she got pregnant. But Theo didn’t care, in fact, they took the news with unbridled joy; they had always wanted to be a parent.
Not long after that, Theo proposed to Imogen and they got a dog together. When things seemed to finally calm down and settle, Imogen got an offer to work in New York so they embarked on yet another adventure together.
@brooklynextras
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thinking about how annalise bases so much of her self-worth on how she's doing academically or in her career and sometimes even in her personal life. failures on her end are something she struggles so very deeply with, and annalise can see a failure in almost anything—even little things like a mistake in paperwork or her writing not being legible enough. they make her feel so worthless because growing up, she was conditioned to feel like her father only loved her when she did something good. she only saw him smile so genuinely when she aced a quiz or passed one of his tests or one of her tutors gave her a good mark. and that translated into annalise growing up not feeling worthy unless she's doing everything perfectly. she also struggles with receiving criticism because of this—she'll often take it, twist it, and spiral (although she's gotten a lot better about this in present times). a mistake in paperwork? she's going to triple-check everything she ever writes down from now on. she needs to work on her interpersonal skills? catch her taking night classes for months and barely resting because she's so consumed with studying and overcoming it on such an unhealthy fucking scale.
annalise would guilt herself into a coma if she could over the smallest fucking mistakes, even now, because she genuinely can't feel all right with herself if she doesn't actively see perfection or progress. and god don't get me started on how it impacts her healing journey because it's evident so much then... only a few weeks into therapy and she's breaking down because she's not miraculously cured and her past still haunts her. she thinks she's done something wrong because she hasn't been able to "fix" herself only weeks after beginning the work and it makes her feel unworthy of even healing.
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Stella has been taking care of herself for as long as she can remember. Her parents didn't raise her exactly as she more raised herself. She lived with her parents until she moved to the academy in Paldea but no one would've ever guessed that by looking at the house or talking to her parents.
Stella had to fill out the forms for attending the Paldea Academy herself same with the transfer forms for Blueberry Academy. She even took herself to the airport for the flight to Paldea and Unova. Her parents have never visited her at school or wrote or called her. As far as anyone can tell Stella has no parents and her parents have no child.
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Stolas is very used to having to put on some sort of mask with pretty much everyone.
With his father, he learned to become the dutiful son who was obedient and never showed his emotions beyond what was "respectable" for the situation. He knew he meant little to Paimon beyond the fact that he was to carry on the Ars Goetia name (his birthday certainly wasn't the only time his father forgot his name), and he played that part to perfection. Stolas married Stella, despite having absolutely zero interest in any sort of relationship with her, he didn't complain about …. basically anything.
Because if he ever did, he would be belittled and put down. He was excited about getting his grimoire and learning what his job was going to be, only for that to be immediately followed up with "Also, you're going to marry this person you don't know and the picture I'm showing you is of her actively hurting her pets." And when Stolas understandably reacted to that, he was told "that's an ugly noise" and to "cease this bitch crying."
It certainly wasn't the first time his father told him something like that, and it wouldn't be the last.
He's so drawn to Blitzo at the circus because the performer was clearly excited about what he was doing, and he didn't let his failure to make a balloon horse right away get him down. Instead, he kept trying and when he made a horse without legs, he made a joke about it instead. And when Stolas laughed, he responded to him and appreciated the fact he'd gotten a response, which was also a first for Stolas.
He was already starry-eyed about Blitzo before the latter came to the house because of that tiny interaction, and then suddenly, Blitzo was there, in his house. He had liked that Stolas had laughed at his joke; maybe he could share some things of his own, share any of himself without being scolded for it! Sure, Blitzo wasn't that interested in his books, but he showed Stolas something he'd never had before: how to play games. Stolas was able to have fun and be himself without fear for the first time.
He truly considered Blitzo to be his friend, and if he'd had any way of keeping in touch, he would have.
But that was the last time he was really allowed to behave in any way childishly. Because after that point, he had to become the dutiful son again, focus on his studies. No more carefree days of playing with other children.
And when he came of age, he married Stella. He certainly wasn't interested in their marriage, but he tried very hard to be, hoping that if he put in the effort, it would change how he felt.
But once they had Octavia (when he was only nineteen), it quickly became clear that his marriage to Stella was going to continue to be one of convenience and nothing more. Stolas still tried to be a good husband, so that he could also be a better father than his had been, but even then, he couldn't really let his himself just be.
Stella continued to put him down, insulting him in pretty much any way she could think of, and he couldn't show how much it got to him. Because if he did, then that would only give her something else to throw back at him.
He tried to shield Via from the worst of it, but every year that went by, it got harder and harder to do.
Other than his daughter, he was incredibly lonely, sequestered for much of his life, and controlled in some aspect for so much of it.
It's part of the reason why, when his first friend returned, and showed interest in him, Stolas was so intrigued. He'd never felt wanted before that point, never had anyone express any sort of desire for him, and for it to be this person he'd been himself with, even if it had been twenty five years previous, is so foreign to him.
And so when Blitz is flirting and forward, even then, because he has no idea how to act in this situation because he's never been in this sort of situation before, he tries to match Blitz's energy because that's what he wants, right? And Stolas is used to putting other people's wants before his own.
But as he spends more time with Blitz, especially when they're not just sleeping together, he starts to show more of himself, starts to actually let someone see who he really is. And that's how he has the courage to stand up to Stella, to finally initiate a divorce. Because if someone like Blitz, this bold, courageous, funny, amazing person can see him for who he is and doesn't immediately push him away or hate him, then maybe he can do something for himself for once. Maybe he can make his own life better.
Because now he knows there is a better. He had been trying to stick it out and stay in the marriage, to try to provide Octavia some form of stability, but that hasn't been working, and is, in fact, actively harming his daughter. Which is even more important than his own well-being. He's going to do better so that he can also be better for Octavia, if it's not too late. The status quo hasn't been working, and Stolas is finally figuring out a way to take off his masks, even the ones he wears for himself.
#ᯓ★ stolas : headcanon#verbal abuse tw#spousal abuse tw#parental neglect tw#arranged marriage cw#long post cw
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