#p sure I’m sending this into the Void but

[emeraldcitynerdfighter]

Also, before the last chapter posts, if anyone* has any burning questions about the writing of ‘gusts’, AMA!

*the, like, two people who normally respond on here

[lubdubology]

Til The Sun Turns Black

SYNOPSIS: Your soul is bound to his and you're destined to follow him across the multiverse. When the TVA finds you and sends you to the Void, you feel your chance of finding him has slipped through your fingers. But what you find there is more than you bargained for.

PAIRING: Worst!Wolverine x fem!reader

WC: 13.1 k I apologize for nothing

WARNINGS: smut 18+, mdni, mentions of drinking, angst, peril, some fluff, implied age gap (I guess?), mental trauma, miscommunication, Wade being Wade, dirty talk, oral (m and f receiving), fingering, cowgirl, missionary, cock warming, sex with feelings, unprotected p in v

A/N: Thank you so much for all the love on Soft Edges! I was not expecting that kind of response when I posted that story, so thank you <3. I had the idea for this story in my head since after I first saw the movie. I had no idea my one random runaway thought would turn into this. Also, this story would not have been finished if it weren't for @joelsgoldrush. She let me tease her for WEEKS with this and act as the ultimate sounding board. And she's overall just a delightful human being and I'm so glad I've found her.

The TVA agent sits staring at you, an odd and uncomfortable smile on his face. Like he isn’t quite sure he knows how to smile but had seen it once on TV.  You also don’t think he’s blinked in the past several minutes. It makes your eyes water just thinking about it. 

“I don’t understand why I’m here.”

“Ah, yes, well—“ the agent clears his throat and smoothes a hand down his chest. “You’re a threat to the multiverse.”

You squint your eyes at him and wonder if you’re lucid dreaming. Or trapped in some bizarre fever dream, but you can’t remember being sick. “The…multiverse? As in, more than one universe?”

He nods once. “Precisely.”

It’s your turn to stare as absolutely none of this is making sense. The morning had started off normal—wake up, shower, coffee at your favorite local corner store. You had barely finished your latte when you were apprehended and taken to this bland room by a man who must own insane stock in eyedrops. 

“You see, we’ve been watching you for quite some time,” he continues, oblivious of your growing confusion. “A handful of reincarnations, actually. And we believe we’ve finally pinned it down.”

His words sound insane. 

You were a low level mutant at best. You’ve been able to deeply sense and influence emotions in others since you were six—a standard empath if there ever was one. But reincarnation?

“Reincarnations? I’m sorry but—”

You feel it coming then, that all too familiar prickle of deja vu creeping up your spine and setting deep in your brain. The room begins to soften, the corners blurring and you feel disjointed, separate from the you sitting in the chair.

“Ah, see. We’ve pinned it down.”

The world tilts on its axis and your mind explodes into brilliance, the memories of hundreds of alternate versions of yourself firing down your synapses, leaving you as raw and exposed as a fresh wound. The pain is all consuming as you gasp for air and desperately try to quell the throbbing in your skull. 

Your hands grip the edge of the table, desperate to clutch at something solid to root you in reality as the kaleidoscope of memories swirl before your eyes, colliding and merging with one another. All the timelines converging down to a single point of existence within your mind. It doesn’t matter how many times you’ve experienced this process, the return of your memories—the return of your consciousness—was always accompanied by a torturous sensory overload. 

“You see? You have extensive knowledge of the multiverse. And that kind of knowledge is coveted and dangerous.”

Your vision blurs as the memories keep slamming into you and you can’t help the primal scream that rips from your lungs, the pain in your throat a welcome distraction from the torture in your head. And then, amid the chaos, a single figure emerges in crisp focus, a face you’ve seen thousands of times.

“Logan.” His name comes out in a whisper, your voice trembling.

You know he’s not actually in front of you and instead a mirage, a figment of your overloaded neurons, but his presence calms you. 

“Yes, Logan. You two are quite fond of each other.” The agent stands and you squint up at him, wanting to be anywhere else as you regain your memories. “But never mind him. We can’t have you traipsing around with all that knowledge in your head.”

“No, no, no, please. Please just let me find him,” you beg, hating the desperation laced in your voice. 

The last thing you see before being sent out of existence is his creepy, uncanny smile. 

+++

The Void was bullshit. 

It had been a month since you were unceremoniously dumped here. 

Maybe. 

You weren’t really sure.  

Time had no meaning, each day seeming to stretch on for eons and simultaneously in the blink of an eye. And for every single one of those moments you’d been focused on one of two things: finding a way out and not dying. 

You quickly learned you had a better chance at survival if you stuck to the outskirts and avoided others. So you squirreled yourself away, sheltering in an abandoned cabin and hoping beyond hope you could figure out a way out of the desolate cesspool you found yourself in. 

Figure out a way back to him. 

Back home. 

+++

You don’t venture out unless you have to. 

The Void is full of phantom emotions left behind by its previous inhabitants and the cacophony overwhelms you. Rage, terror and despair so thickly envelope every surface you feel like you’re choking. It’s beginning to wear so harshly on your nerves you wonder if you might actually go insane here.

There was a tension growing in the Void. You’d heard whispers of unrest within the factions, Cassandra hungry for something to sink her teeth into. The undercurrent of rage has increased in the last couple of days and it’s enough to set your teeth on edge.

Stuffing a backpack with a few essentials in case you get stranded, you ready yourself for a supply run. The thought of leaving the perceived safety of your cabin has little appeal, but you’ve been putting it off for far too long. There was a small cache only a few miles from your cabin that other survivors kept stocked with extra provincials. You were hoping for something good, anything other can canned food or cereal. Or Spam. 

Tightening the straps on your backpack, you take one last glance around before stepping out into the forest. It’s eerily quiet, no birds or animals chattering to fill the silence, just the crunch of your shoes against fallen leaves. The Void has always felt oppressive to you, the air just a little too heavy, but there’s something lingering today that makes you feel on edge. Your skin prickles with anticipation and you pat your belt for the knife you’ve stashed there. 

Just in case. 

You’re half a mile away from the cache when you feel it—the inky slick of anger. It catches on the air and wafts towards you in waves. You slow your steps as you approach the road and come to a halt when the battered van comes into view. 

Your breath hitches in your throat. 

You’d recognize those claw marks anywhere. 

Your heart races as your eyes trace the deep, jagged cuts gouged into the metal and the large swathes of blood coating the ground and what you can see of the interior of the van. Instinctively your hand tightens around the hilt of your knife and you crouch down low behind a fallen log. You scan the area for any signs of movement and find none, but you know Logan is stealthier than you and wouldn’t give up his location willingly. 

The van door creaks open on its battered hinges and you inhale sharply as Logan stumbles out of the vehicle covered in dried blood and sweat and more knife wounds and bullet holes than you can count. 

The sight of him ignites a spark of longing that blooms in your chest and makes you physically ache. You can feel him. Your lips remember the hungered warmth of his mouth against yours, the way he’d nip at your bottom lip so you’d open up for him. Your skin remembers the calloused rasp of his hands and not just the greedy grabs when he needed to claim you, but the light brushes of his fingertips against your palm as he held your hand, just to remind himself that you were real. Your nose remembers his scent, woodsy and clean, like the earth after rain. 

Shaking your head, you push down the memories and peer back over the log. A slight breeze wafts through the air and you watch as he sniffs, his head turning in your direction. 

“Fuck,” you curse lowly, trying to crouch further out of eyesight. 

You hear the metallic snikt of his claws and your pulse quickens. There’s no point in hiding—he knows you’re there. You take a slow, steady breath before attempting to focus waves of calm in his direction, hoping to ease some of the anger wound around him. 

His eyes lock onto yours, sharp and predatory and he shakes his head, trying to keep you out. “Who the fuck’re you?” 

You draw back your power and raise your hands in surrender as you slowly rise to your feet. You toss out your name and silently hope for a spark of recognition. But he doesn’t know you. Not yet. 

“It’s not safe out here alone,” you start, moving out of your hiding place. You walk towards him, his eyes following your every move. “There’s a cache just up ahead—” 

The atmosphere shifts without warning, the anger you’d felt previously now melting into thick, cloying fear and desperation. You can taste the ozone and the hairs at the back of your neck stand on end as electricity sizzles across the sky. Glancing up, you see the dark, swirling mass of Alioth just beginning to form. 

You look at Logan, panic racing along your nerves. “I promise I’ll explain everything to you later, but I know you, Logan, and right now I need you to trust me.” 

Alioth’s presence is getting stronger and drawing closer, and every drop of tension and rage swirling within is beginning to weigh down on you, threatening to suffocate you. 

Logan’s eyes narrow, but there’s a slight twitch in his jaw and you know he’s considering your words. His claws retract, but his muscles remain tense, coiled and ready to attack. You grab for his arm, feeling the warmth of his skin and the hard muscle beneath your fingers. “We have to go. Now.”

For a moment, you think he might resist. But then with a low curse, he follows you, his stride matching yours as you lead him towards the cache. The trees blur by, the wind picking up and beginning to toss leaves and loose branches into the air. 

You’re operating on pure adrenaline and your heart pounds in your chest as you run, Alioth gaining speed and distance faster than either of you can move. Each gasp of air burns your lungs and your muscles ache with the effort of your sprint. 

Still a quarter of a mile away from the cache, you know you won’t be able to outrun Alioth. The storm has consumed the sky, the sun diminished to twilight, as the thunder and groans loom ever closer. You turn towards Logan and yell, “It’s too close, we’re not gonna make it!”

Logan’s eyes flash with anger as you stop and turn towards the oncoming destruction. He grabs for your wrist, pulling you almost nose to nose. “What the fuck are you talking about?” he growls, chest heaving with the effort to breathe. “We can’t stop!”

His proximity briefly disarms you, his fierce gaze igniting something deep within you, but you don’t have time to dwell on those emotions. You take a deep breath in an attempt to steady your nerves. “I’m gonna try and calm it down.”

“What are you going to do, think happy thoughts at it?” he asks, his tone biting and sarcastic. 

You know every cell in his body is begging to fight, aching to release his claws and tear Alioth apart with his bare hands. But this isn’t something brute strength can subdue. 

“Just trust me,” you plead, your eyes searching his for some indication that he believes you. “Please.”

His stare is hard, but eventually his eyes soften and he loosens his grip on your wrist. “Fine.”

Tearing your gaze from him, you turn back towards the storm, now a full blown maelstrom of anger and destruction hellbent on consuming you both whole. You exhale slowly, pushing your own emotions of fear and panic as far down as you can. Instead, you turn inward and concentrate on every feeling of peace, calm and stillness you’ve ever experienced and project it outwards. Waves of soothing energy pour from you, an almost ghostly aura emanating from you as your power continues to grow. Alioth continues to surge towards you, the wind now flattening trees to the ground and lifting debris high into the air. 

The fight is excruciating, every cell in your body shaking with effort as you continue to project outwards, the sphere of your influence growing. When the two opposing masses collide, you’re almost knocked off your feet by the force. You’re vaguely aware of Logan beside you, claws unsheathing as he steps closer into your protective shield. 

For a brief moment, you feel the power of the storm ebb before it seems to press into you harder. Your knees begin to buckle and your stance slips. “I…I don’t know if I can hold it!” you gasp. 

Logan doesn’t run but instead moves closer, giving you one solitary nod. You can feel Logan’s eyes on you, feel the doubt swirling behind them and yet he stays besides you, ready to fight. 

His silent encouragement is enough. 

You are not dying in the fucking Void. 

Gritting your teeth, you continue to push. A guttural scream rips from your throat as black spots dot your vision and blood drips from your nose. You dig down, channeling every last drop of your energy into a final wave, extending yourself deep within the core of the storm. 

The black of the storm begins to retreat and the wind begins to calm. As the first few beams of sunlight filter in through the treetops, your vision fades completely and the world goes black. 

The last thing you feel is a pair of strong arms wrapping around you before your mind goes blissfully blank and unconsciousness claims you. 

+++

You wake up in the cache. 

Dust motes dance in the sunlight streaming in through the broken windows. The light is soft, definitely not the early morning glow from before you left the comfort of your cabin and you wonder how long you were out. With a groan, you try to sit up. Your body is stiff, every muscle in your body aching with the effort you took to banish Alioth. Wincing, you swing your legs out of the makeshift bed, the effort taking your breath away and you can feel the sickly creep of nausea climb up your throat. 

A low voice cuts through the haze. “Take it easy.”

Logan. 

You blink, trying to adjust your eyes to the light and find him sitting on the floor, one leg pulled up to his chest as a bottle of whiskey hangs between his fingers. He takes a long pull and wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. 

“How long was I out?” you ask, your voice hoarse. 

Logan doesn’t answer immediately. He reaches over at a box beside him and then rolls a water bottle towards your feet before he finally mutters, “A day.” 

You accept the bottle with a nod of thanks. Taking a slow sip, you close your eyes as the liquid soothes your throat even as your body protests the movement. You’ve never used your powers to that degree before. Fuck, you didn’t even know you could. A perverse sense of pride licks at the edge of your exhaustion. 

Lowering the bottle, you breathe deeply in an attempt to settle the nausea rolling in the pit of your stomach. You glance at Logan and find him watching you, his eyes sharp, calculating. 

“You owe me some answers. You said you knew me.”

You meet his gaze, the weight of his words pressing down on you. After hundreds of encounters with different Logans, it was never easy explaining to him what you were. For a long time, you didn’t even have a name for it. All you knew was that your consciousness, all your memories, everything that you are moves across different universes and inevitably crosses paths with Logan. It always felt like an invisible string, guiding your soul to his. 

“I’m a temporal nomad.”

Logan’s eyes narrow as he glares at you. “A temporal what?” His tone is laced with skepticism. 

You take another sip of water, giving yourself time to gather your thoughts and push away the throbbing at your temples. “A temporal nomad. I don’t die, not in the way you think, anyway.”

Logan doesn’t move, but you see his grip tighten on the bottle in his hand, his knuckles going white. “You tellin’ me you’re immortal?”

“No, not immortal,” you reply, exhaling slowly. “When I die, my consciousness moves. I reincarnate in a different universe. Eventually I regain everything—my experiences, my memories, my feelings. It’s why—” you pause and take a deep, steadying breath. “It’s why I always find you.”

Your words hit their mark and Logan’s eyes flash with something you can’t quite decipher—shock, disbelief, maybe some anger. He sits up straighter, tipping the whiskey bottle to his lips without breaking eye contact. “You always find me?” he asks, his voice a low rumble. “We’ve met before?”

“I’ve lost count of how many time, actually,” you admit softly. “But in every reality, every universe, I find you. And we’re not just friends, Logan.”

Your words linger in the air between you and your heart pounds loudly in your chest. Logan stands suddenly, the now empty whiskey bottle clattering to the ground. He runs a hand through his hair before scrubbing it down his face, his jaw clenched as he paces within the small space. A mirthless chuckle escapes his lips. “This smells like bullshit, sweetheart.”

Your heart aches at his use of the word sweetheart. It’s one he’s always preferred for you, usually spoken with reverence, like a prayer falling from his lips. Except now it’s casual and cold, something with a sharp edge instead of softness. 

“I know how crazy it sounds. Believe me, Logan, it took me several lifetimes to wrap my mind around it.” You stand, your legs wobbly with the effort and you wince against the pull in your spent muscles. “But I know you.”

His expression hardens. “Yeah? Well, I don’t know you. And if you really knew me, you’d know to stay the fuck away from people like me.” Logan’s pacing grows more hurried, his hands clenching into fists. 

“I can’t,” you say softly, taking a tentative step closer towards him. “And I don’t want to. While I might not know the Logan in front of me or the nuances that make you different from the others, I know you.”

His nostrils flare and he lets out a low growl. “Stop.”

“I know the way you fight,” you continue, ignoring his warning. “I know the way you carry your pain as if no one else can possibly shoulder that weight. I know—”

“Stop!”

“—how you push people away to protect them, but that deep down you hope someone will push back. You may carry a lot of self loathing, Logan, but even you know you’re not heartless.” 

Logan’s fist slams into the wall behind him, the sound reverberating in the small room. He stands there, chest heaving, his knuckles bleeding from where they made contact with the rough wooden planks. You watch as the raw skin knits itself back together, his head hanging low. 

His jaw clenches as he wipes the blood from his hands, his breathing still ragged and posture rigid, itching for a fight. He glances over at you, his expression softer but still rough. 

“We’re done here,” he growls, but his voice soft, more broken than angry. 

Logan turns without another word and all you can do is watch him leave.

+++

You spend the rest of the morning dozing in bursts of fitful sleep, your confrontation with Logan taking its emotional toll. Your eyes burn with unshed tears and for the first time in your life, you feel as if you’re destined to wander this universe alone. 

But you can’t think about it. 

Not now. 

Ignoring the ache in your limbs, you pack up what supplies you can and ready yourself for the walk back to your cabin. The sun is a couple of hours from setting, the world bathed in golden light, when you set out. Walking down the steps, you pause at the distant crunch of boots on the gravel. You feel your pulse thrum in your chest as the sound gets closer and then he steps into view, his eyes locking onto yours. 

Logan. 

The sight of him standing there fills you with a rush of conflicting emotions. Relief, angry, anxiety and you’re not sure if you trust yourself to speak first. He looks the same—tired, disheveled, but steady and strong all the same. Neither of you moves, unspoken words hanging between you.

“I shouldn’t’ve left,” he says finally. 

For a moment you say nothing. Because it’s exactly what you want to hear from him. Except, because you’re beyond exhausted, mentally, physically and emotionally, you say, “No, you fucking shouldn’t have.” 

There’s definitely more bite in your tone than you intended, but the release of some of your pent up anger feels so good you can’t bring yourself to care. 

Logan’s eyes narrow as you move past him and keep walking. “Wait, so I come back here to apologize,” he begins, following close behind you, “and now you’re gonna just walk away?”

“You know, you never even thanked me for saving your ass,” you say, side stepping a downed log. “Just started demanding answers and then tucked tail and ran when you didn’t like what I had to say.”

He grabs your wrist and you stumble into his grasp, your breath hitching in your throat as you stand almost chest to chest. “I didn’t fucking ask for any of this!”

His anger bleeds into you, curling around your skin where his fingers press into your pulse point. You feel your nostrils flare and you’re itching for something to hit as you stare up at him, his jaw clenched. Your heart pounds wildly in your chest and you know you need to reign in your emotions or you’ll ignite the fuse between you. 

“You think I did?” you ask, pulling your arm from his grasp. Your voice is calmer, but just as sharp. “You think I want to relive the grief of mourning you over and over while also finding something new to love about you? You think I wanted to be banished to the Void all because my soul just can’t die when I do?”

Logan’s expression softens and he scrubs a hand down his face, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Look. I’ve had a shitty coupla days here. And you’re saying a lot of shit I don’t understand.”

He seems weary, then, and any remaining anger you harbor towards him dies in your veins. You take a deep breath in and blow it out slowly. “You don’t have to understand right now. Just—just trust me. Please?”

You hate how your voice breaks just a little.

Logan nods then, the barest tilt of his head, but it’s enough.

He continues to follow you through the woods back towards the cabin and for a while neither of you speak. It should feel awkward, especially now, but it doesn’t. You’re so used to his brand of stubbornness and reluctance to see what’s right in his face that this is the most at home you’ve felt since you got here. 

“So,” you start after a few minutes of silence, “how did you end up here?”

Logan huffs. “Some asshole in red spandex dragged me here and I said I need to help save his universe.”

“And can you?”

His step falters and you pause to look a him, his gaze fixed somewhere beyond the trees. “I couldn’t save mine.” The weight of his words linger, heavy with a burden only he alone has been shouldering. He doesn’t meet your eyes as he brushes past you and keeps walking. 

“Wanna talk about it?” you ask, catching up with him.

Logan growls. “No.”

“Alright, maybe later then,” you reply and he simply ignores you and keeps on walking. “Where’s this asshole friend of yours?”

“I left him tied up in the van.”

You had long passed the spot where you found Logan by the beat up van and the road was deserted. Based on the subtle smirk on his face, you figure Logan already knows that. Whatever his relationship is with the stranger, he seems somewhat happy to be rid of him and you don’t push him further. Although, you can’t help but wonder what happened to the van and whose hands it fell into. 

Logan’s gait slows as the cabin comes into view through the trees. He follows behind you as you clear the space, checking for any stragglers that may have come along while you were gone. Pushing open the door, you watch as he looks around, taking in the small space. 

“You’ve been living here?”

“I wouldn’t exactly call it living, but sure,” you comment, throwing your backpack on the table as you sit down. You can’t help the groan that escapes your lips as your muscles relax. “You can stay here if you want. I didn’t just let you follow me for your sparkling personality, you know.”

Logan actually laughs at that as he sits down on the small couch. His face lightens up, eyes crinkling just a bit at the corners, and for the first time since you found him, he seems unburdened. A blossom of hope grows in your chest and you grasp onto it, holding tight to the one bit of light you’ve had in this month of darkness. 

“Thank you,” he says softly. 

You know he means for more than the offer to stay and you return his smile with one of your own. “You’re welcome.”

As the sun starts to dip below the horizon, you bring out some extra blankets and a couple of pillows and help Logan turn the couch into a makeshift bed. You turn to leave when you hear him ask, “You really find me in every universe?”

“Yes.”

“That sounds terrible.”

You give him a small smile as you lean against the doorframe to the bedroom. “Oh, it’s not all that bad. I get to fall in love with you all over again.”

+++

You wake in the middle of the night to the sound of low, panicked growls coming from across the room.

You quietly slip from the bed and tiptoe towards the couch. Logan writhes beneath the sheets, pain etched across his face as he wrestles the demons in his sleeping mind. Taking a deep breath, you center yourself and focus every fiber of your power in his direction, hoping the waves of calm can break through whatever battle he’s fighting deep in the recesses of his mind.

Logan growls deep in his throat, the sound guttural and raw, his claws unsheathing and tearing at the sheets beneath him in agitation. A fine sheen of sweat beads along his brow and pieces of hair are plastered against his damp forehead.

“Logan,” you say softly, trying to break through the fog of his nightmare. “You’re safe, Logan.”

Your powers are waning, the stress of fighting off Alioth having left you depleted. You push down the ache, the tug in your brain demanding that you draw back, and instead kneel down in front of him, trailing your fingers across his palm and over the pulse point in his wrist. He jerks at your touch, his claws coming close to your skin, but the contact is enough and you feel his pulse slow beneath your fingertips.

You continue to speak in hushed tones, your voice barely above a whisper. “There you go, Logan. I’m right here. I’ve got you.”

Logan’s breathing is ragged, his eyes squeezed shut. You can feel the tension in his body, his muscles rigid with the need for release. You keep your fingers against his wrist, your touch steady and calming, as you bring up your other hand to smooth the lines along his brow.

“There you go,” you continue to murmur, “Focus on my voice. Focus on my calm.”

Gradually, his growls subside and his breathing begins to even out as the nightmare loses its grip over him. His muscles lose their tension and relax and the frantic movements of his limbs subsides. With one final deep breath, he stills, his claws retracting and he settles back into a peaceful sleep.

You sit and watch him for a minute, taking in all of his features and simply admiring him for the first time since your last life with him. This Logan is different—they all are in their own way—but this one a little more than the others. He seems wearier, more worn down, his usual scowl lines etched deep. There’s an exhaustion in his eyes, too, you haven’t seen before and you wonder if this Logan actually ever rests. 

As you stand, you feel his fingers circle loosely around your wrist and give a small tug. You look down to where he’s touching you, his skin hot against yours, and you glance up to find him staring at you through half lidded eyes. 

“Stay.” It comes out in a low whisper and as you open your mouth to protest, he adds, “Please.”

You could never deny him in any universe.

The couch is barely wider than he is, yet he shifts to make a sliver of space for you to slot yourself into. It should be awkward, the way you press yourself between the couch and the solid warmth of his frame, but it’s not. You hitch your leg over his hip, forcing your legs to tangle, as you rest your head against his chest. His heartbeat is strong and comforting beneath your ear and you find yourself quickly relaxing into his touch.

As you fall asleep, you feel his arm curl around you, tucking protectively against your ribs.

+++

When morning breaks, you’re alone. The warmth of his body is gone and you find yourself shivering. Pushing to sit, you wrap a blanket around yourself before standing up. 

The cabin is empty.

You try and ignore the sliver of panic that threatens to slip its way down your spine. 

Opening the front door, you pause when you find him sitting on the dilapidated porch, staring absently out at the trees. He glances up at you and watches as you sit down beside him. You hug the blanket closer around your shoulders and sit with him in silence.

You don’t mention last night.

“So,” you start, “what’s the plan?”

Logan raises his eyebrow. “You planning on stickin’ with me?”

“If you let me,” you reply with a smile.

You listen as Logan explains the events of the past couple of days, including Wade’s abduction of him from his own universe and how they both became to be bloodied and battered in the van. Your ears perk up when he mentions Paradox and returning to Wade’s universe. 

“You think he can actually get back?” you ask, willing yourself to not hold onto too much hope. 

Logan huffs. “Probably not.” 

“And yet you’re out here trying to think of a way to find him,” you say. “Why?”

A frown tugs at Logan’s mouth and he looks down at his hands. Eventually, he reaches into the pocket of his suit and pulls out a crumpled Polaroid. He tilts it towards you and you look down at the group or smiling people. “He’s got something to go home to,” he says, thumbing the edge of the photo. “I got nothin’.”

There’s something soft in his gaze as he looks down at the photo, some lingering hope he’s too afraid to put words to. 

“I’m sure you have something, Logan,” you say quietly. 

His expression hardens then, jaw tightening, as he slips the photo back in his pocket. “Had. Past tense.” Logan stands then and looks down at you. “Get ready. We’re leaving in five.” 

+++

You get ready quickly, changing your clothes and splashing water on your face before making sure your pack was sufficiently stocked. You were hoping you wouldn’t be needing it for much longer, but you didn’t want to express that thought out loud. Despite Logan wishing to go back to find Wade, you knew he wasn’t convinced this would end well.

Logan’s already started down the path as you jog down the cabin steps, swinging your pack up onto your shoulders. Catching up with him, you hand him the Pop-Tart you pulled out earlier. “Breakfast? They’re unfrosted, because this is the Void, but it’s something.”

He looks down at you, a strange expression on his face, but he accepts your offer. “Thanks,” he says, taking a bite.

“So, where exactly were you headed when you both decided to maul each other silly?” you ask, keeping pace with him as you walk through the woods.

“Johnny had mentioned a resistance out in the Borderlands,” Logan answers, swallowing the bite of Pop-Tart. “Figured we might find some people who could help us get control over Cassandra.” 

You nod. “You’re not far from the Borderlands. Maybe four or so miles from he cache. I haven’t ventured out that far, but I’ve heard there’s a few outposts where others have hunkered down.”

“Then that’s where we go.”

You walk in comfortable silence, leaving Logan to his thoughts as you travel further away from safety and into the unknown. You stop at the cache briefly, pausing only snag a few water bottles before moving on. 

A couple of miles past the cache, Logan suddenly stops, sniffing the air. His posture goes rigid, on alert as he slowly moves forward, beckoning you to follow him. A few yards away, the beat up van comes into view, parked alongside a lodging that looks as if it was built into the very earth itself. 

Logan’s arm darts out, stopping you. “Stay close,” he commands quietly, stepping cautiously closer towards the structure.

You follow behind him, every sense on alert as you step inside. The place is quiet, but then you hear it—the soft rustle of snoring. And then Logan’s soft, “Ah, fuck me.”

Peering over his shoulder, you find a sleeping Wade spread eagle on the bed. Logan side steps the bed, ignoring the sleeping man, and begins rummaging through the place. Finding a bottle of whiskey, he groans in delight, twisting the cap off and taking a long pull. 

“Really Logan?”

He quirks an eyebrow at you, wiping at his mouth with the back of his hand. “What else would you like me to be doing?” he asks, biting. 

“You came all this way to find him and now you’re gonna just drink?” you ask in disbelief. It gnaws at you, his indifference. You can feel little frissons of indignation licking at your skin and you have to tamp down your emotions before they bleed into him. 

Logan shrugs. “He’s asleep. I ain’t draggin’ him anywhere.”

You cross your arms, glaring at Logan in frustration. “I didn’t follow you here to watch you stand around and get drunk. Wake him up.”

He gives you a sidelong glance, his brow furrowing. You don’t relent, your stare pointed as he takes another long pull from the bottle. Muttering to himself, Logan makes his way over to the bed and gives it one swift, forceful kick. 

Wade jolts awake with a loud, exaggerated snort. He looks between you and Logan, his eyes finally settling on you. “Who’re you?” he asks, looking around as if expecting an answer. “When did the script get rewritten?”

You look at him quizzically, your eyebrow raised. “Who are you talking to?”

Wade huffs. “The audience,“ he says, gesturing towards the wall.

“Does he do this often?” you ask Logan in a whisper.

“Hasn’t stopped since he fucking dragged me here,” Logan replies. 

Your attention is diverted as Wade suddenly rolls from he bed, crossing the room and two large strides. He unsheathes one of his katanas, pressing himself against the wall and then he’s pinned on the ground as a woman pulls a blade of her own. After a moment, she lets Wade up and two more people follow into the room behind her. 

Logan eyes each one with suspicion as introductions are made and you can feel the tension growing within him as he continues to drink.

You jump as Gambit uses one of his playing cards to burst the bottle of whiskey in Logan’s hands. Logan ignores your pleading look and Wade’s admonishment as he grabs another bottle with a soft, “Boo boo boo.”

When Laura enters, you feel Logan’s interest pique, something heavy weighing on him. They both look towards one another, taking each other in and you don’t miss the recognition in Laura’s eyes.

“Do you know her?” you ask Logan, sliding closer to him.

Logan shakes his head. “No. But Wade’s Logan does.” He takes another long drink from the bottle, eyes still trained on her.

Wade continues to talk with the group, recapping their time in the Void and how they managed to escape Cassandra’s lair. Logan punctuates the conversation with vitriolic quips of his own, drinking more as Wade tries to get the group to form a team.

You try to send your power Logan’s way, trying to bleed into him some calm, but he shakes his shoulders and brushes you off. “Don’t fucking bother, sweetheart.”

“I can help you, Logan.”

“Yeah, well, I didn’t ask for it.”

As Wade rallies the group into a cohesive unit, gaining their support in taking down Cassandra, Logan huffs a bitter laugh. “You’re all fucking dead.”

“Oh, my god, read the room,” Wade chides. 

+++

Logan storms off, one bottle of whiskey fisted in each hand. You want to follow after him, but Wade stops you. “Let him go, cupcake. Peanut’s in a fragile state and you’re too pretty to become mincemeat.”

You shoot a glare at him and brush his hand away from your shoulder. “No, he only seems to sink his claws into you,” you bite back, but the anger leeches from your voice. 

“Spicy,” Wade comments, “I like you. The script editor worked overtime on you, I can tell.”

“Yeah, well the jury’s still out over here,” you say, but you can’t help the twitch of a smile tugging at your lips. 

You glance over at the door and feel Wade sidle up beside you. “Seriously, cupcake. Chasing after him is like trying to catch a raccoon with rabies. Might be fun, but it’s not worth the bite.”

“Oh yeah?” you ask, peering over at him, “And how long have you known him?”

Wade pretends to look down at his wrist and taps a non-existent watch. “Four days, six hours and thirty-two minutes,” he says with a smirk, “but I don’t really like to put a timestamp on friendship."

With a groan, you plop down on the bed and rub at your temples. “Is everything a joke with you?”

“Mostly,” he chirps with a grin. He leans back against the wall and crosses his arms as he watches you. “But I have been known to press pause occasionally.” Wade regards you for a moment, a slight tilt to his head. “Honey badger does it for you, huh?”

Sighing, you lay back on the bed and stare up at the ceiling. “I have followed Logan through millennia, Wade. I can’t remember a time anymore where I haven’t loved him.”

“His mutant dick that good, huh?”

You half laugh, half snort and shoot him a pointed look. “Not everything is about sex, Wade.”

“Agree to disagree,” he says with a shrug. “We’ve all got emotional baggage, mine is definitely over the free to fly limit, but that guy? Literal mountains. Centuries worth, even.”

“Exactly,” you say, sitting up. “I’ve helped him carry more than you can imagine. Logan may push people away, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t need someone to stay.”

Wade cocks his head, considering your words and his expression softens. “You know running after him isn’t going to fix him.”

“I’m not trying to fix him,” you reply. “He just needs to know someone is there for him.” 

“Well, it’s your funeral, cupcake,” he says with a sigh. “I promise I’ll give a really moving eulogy. But, I do think if anyone is gonna convince tall, dark and brooding out there to join us, it’s you.”

You give him a soft smile as you stand. “Thanks, Wade.”

“And just so you know,” he calls after you, “I’m open and willing to being your mutant dick rebound.”

You roll your eyes and walk out the door.

+++

You step outside and see Logan sitting by himself in front of a fire not too far from the lodging. Walking quietly, you stop when you see Laura approach him and sit along side him. You’re close enough that you can hear their words—hear Logan tell her about the suit, about how he found the X-Men, his friends, dead. 

The anger, the loathing, this Logan carries comes into focus and you can’t help but wonder how long he’s lived with this weight upon his shoulders. Suffering alone with only the bottom of a bottle to quiet the thoughts that scream in his mind.

As Laura eventually leaves, she catches your eye and gives you a small nod.

You feel a strange kinship with her. She too has memories of a Logan who no longer exists and who is radically different from the one she has now. You wonder what she’s thinking and have half a mind to follow after her when you hear Logan call out, “I know you’re there.”

You turn back towards where he remains sitting in front of the fire, the whiskey bottle now more than half gone. Closing the gap between you, you sit down alongside him and watch as he continues to stare down into the fading fire.

“How much did you hear?” he asks, taking a large swig from the bottle. 

“Enough,” you answer simply.

Logan grunts and takes a long pull from the bottle, his lips glistening as his swallows get sloppy. “Well, now you know. I’m the worst Logan,” he almost spits, his tone dark and bitter. “You drew the short straw with me, sweetheart.”

“You know I don’t think that,” you say softly. 

Logan doesn’t respond and instead finishes the rest of the whiskey, tossing the bottle somewhere behind him. Scrubbing a hand down his face, he looks over at you. “You actually gonna join them tomorrow?”

“Are you?”

“It’s a fucking suicide mission,” he answers. “You want to walk up to your death, be my guest.”

“If you’re so convinced this is a suicide mission, why don’t you want to go?” you counter, his ire beginning to bleed into the space between you and creep uncomfortably along your skin. “You afraid you might come face to face with actual death and realize that’s not really what you want?” 

Logan’s gaze flicks up to your face, his eyes dark, dangerous. “You’re fucking pushin’ it.”

“Good! Someone fucking should be!” you exclaim, standing from the fallen log. Maybe Wade was right—maybe this was futile. In every universe Logan could be a stubborn ass, but this one was particularly obstinate. “Do you really believe you’re so unredeemable, Logan? That you’re just a vile mutant who doesn’t deserve sympathy after his friends were brutally murdered?”

You can feel his rage boiling just under the surface of the thin veneer of calm. His eyes pierce into you, pinning you in place as he stands to his full height, his fists clenched tightly. 

“You don’t know shit about me, sweetheart,” he growls. 

Anger simmers in your veins, threatening to burn you from the inside out. “Oh fuck you, Logan.”

He takes a step closer, his eyes narrowing as his lips curl into a cruel smile. “Yeah, you’d like that wouldn’t you? Me sinking into your cunt while you picture whatever version of me you think I am.” His voice is a low rumble, adding to the tension threatening to suffocate you. 

Your breath catches in your throat at his words, and it isn’t desire that courses through you, but rage. Your skin prickles and his vitriol ignites something deep within you, something hotter and brighter than you’ve ever felt before. 

“After all this time and everything I’ve told you, you honestly believe that’s all I want from you? You’re a fucking pathetic asshole,” you snap, your voice sharp and laced with venom. 

Logan’s expression darkens, the smirk slipping from his face as his jaw clenches. “You got some balls sayin’ that shit to me,” he spits. 

A small part of you is terrified of him, afraid that he might actually snap. Might actually unsheathe his claws and send you onto your next life without ever having truly lived this one. But you know him, you know him. His pain and rage isn’t towards you, but himself. 

You risk a step closer to him, narrowing the space between you and you can feel the heat radiating off of him, mingling with your own fury. “Yeah, well at least one of us has a pair.”

Logan doesn’t have time to react before you channel your powers towards him, unleashing an explosive burst of energy that sends him staggering back. And then you smother him, smother him in thousands of years of memories, thousands of years of every single feeling you had ever felt for him in every universe you’ve known him. 

The weight of your emotional onslaught brings him to his knees, but you keep pushing, switching from your feelings for him to his feelings for you. All the affection, all the love, all the comfort the two of you shared in every version of your coupling across space and time floods his mind. 

You watch as his expression melts from anger into one of overwhelming vulnerability and pain. His hands, still clenched into fists, tremble beneath the weight of your power surging through him. He looks up at you then, his eyes pleading and your resolve breaks. Tears burn in your eyes and trail down your cheeks, wetting your lips as a scream rips from your lungs.  

Your hold on Logan dissipates as you reign your emotions back under control. You stagger on your feet as your power diminishes, your chest heaving with ragged breaths and broken sobs. You can’t look at him, not yet. If you do, you might actually break. So you do something that you never thought you would do—you leave.

+++

Night in the Void is cool, almost bordering on uncomfortable like everything else in this godforsaken place, but for once it doesn’t bother you. You gaze up at the sky, the haze of distant stars and planets blurring together the more you try and focus on just one. 

You’ve always loved looking at the stars. There was a comfort in knowing you could look up at the sky and see the same constellations in every universe, that there was always one constant among all the variables. 

You don’t know how long you’ve been sitting before you hear the crunch of his boots on the earth, dried leaves and twigs snapping under his heel. Logan joins you on the ground, sitting with a heavy sigh. The maelstrom of emotions swirling within him bleeds into the space between you and you can feel it, thick and heavy and suffocating. 

You risk a glance at him and he looks…defeated. His eyes are red-rimmed and raw and you see something in those hazel eyes you rarely see—fear. Not fear at you, although your guilt would rather have you believe that, but fear of himself, fear of feeling what you’ve shown him. Logan’s breath is slow, controlled, but you can hear the slight tremor in it. 

“I promised myself I would never use my powers on you” you start, your voice barely above a whisper. “I know what it feels like to experience that onslaught. It feels like drowning.” Your voice cracks and you fight to keep the guilt burning in your chest from consuming you whole. “And that was just a fraction of what we’ve felt across lifetimes, Logan.” 

Logan stays silent but gazes at your face, eyes flicking across your features, drinking you in. The scrutiny makes you shiver. Before you isn’t The Wolverine, the X-Man people in his universe loathe, but a man left raw and vulnerable. 

“You shouldn’t have done that,” he says slowly, his voice rough as the words are pulled from him. “You shouldn’t have shown me that.”

You flinch, the weight of his words are a punch to your gut. “I know,” you whisper, wiping tears from your eyes. “I know and I’m sorry, I—”

Logan cuts you off with a shake of his head, his eyes now locked onto yours. “I already knew, sweetheart,”he murmurs, his voice low. “You feel like—you feel like home.” 

Your heart stutters in your chest and for a moment you can’t breathe. The words hang between you, heavy and raw, the sound of them something you’ve been craving to hear. 

“I am your home,” you reply softly. 

Logan shifts beside you, closing the space between you as he slips his hand behind your neck and pulls you in. His mouth crashes to yours, his kiss urgent, rough and desperate. 

You reach for him, gripping his shoulders as you kiss him back, the Void slipping away. There’s only the heat of his mouth, the rough scrape of his beard against your skin, the way his other hand tugs at your waist in an attempt to pull you closer. 

It’s messy and intense and you don’t want it to end. Logan kisses you like a man starved, like you’re his last breath of air. 

A whimper falls from your lips as he finally breaks the kiss, resting his forehead against yours. You’re both breathless, his nose softly nudging yours. 

“Please come with us tomorrow,” you whisper against his skin. “Let me take you home.”

He nods once and that’s all you need. 

+++

The morning comes quicker than anyone would like. 

Nervous energy bleeds through the group, everyone knowing they’re on the precipice of life or death, that this may be the last day they ever inhale air into their lungs or feel the warmth of the sun on their skin.

Logan’s quiet, already tucking into Gambit’s liquor, as you sit down beside him. He looks down at you briefly, taking a long long pull before offering you the bottle. You take it from him and take a swig of your own, the amber liquid burning a path down your throat. 

“What are you thinking?” you ask, handing him back the bottle.

He stares down at his feet, swirling the liquid around in the glass. “I honestly don’t even fuckin’ know.”

You reach for his hand and give him a comforting squeeze. He stares down at you for a moment and then drags his gaze up to your face. “Whatever happens Logan, I’ll be right there with you.”

Final preparations complete, everyone piles into the van, you tucking alongside Logan in the hatchback. The ride is mostly quiet, punctuated only with the few occasional quips by Wade just to ease the tension. You brace yourself, gripping Logan’s calf as Blade sends a rocket launcher through Cassandra’s front gate and Elektra floors it through the explosion. 

The others leave the van first, forming a line of defense. You look up at Logan and lean forward to press the faintest of kisses against his lips. His fingers curl around your neck and pull you closer, deepening it just enough to taste your mouth. 

“Let’s go,” he murmurs, pulling back. “Stay by me.”

You swallow hard, loathe to let him go, wanting to stay in the perceived safety of the van, but you simply nod and follow him to join the others.

Fighting erupts all around you and you stick as close to Logan’s back as you can. It’s a symphony of chaos—rage, fear and determination all swirling heavily in the air. You feel your power thrum underneath your fingertips as you channel those emotions back towards whoever Logan is fighting, hoping to disarm them—even if temporarily—with their own vitriol in an attempt to give him an advantage. 

The air burns in your lungs as you move through the fight, your mind spinning as you gain distance towards Cassandra’s lair. You can see the others move around you—Elektra and Blade slicing down enemies with their blades; Gambit disarming others with his explosively charged playing cards; Laura fighting in a style all her own, yet so much like Logan’s; and Wade cutting down others like he’s having fun.

A clear path opens up to the ramp leading up to Cassandra and the others swarm behind you, allowing yourself, Wade and Logan to break free from the melee. Logan looks back at you just long enough for you to see the fear in his eyes. You try and remain stoic, even though your mind is racing with all he the ways this could go wrong, and give him a small nod of encouragement. 

You stop short in front of Cassandra as she sits sipping tea, seemingly disinterested in the battle happening just outside her stronghold. “You two escaping I could live with, but coming back willingly…” she trails off, “Boys are so silly.” Her eyes dart towards you. “And you brought a friend!”

“I just need to get home,” Wade says, his tone serious. 

“I’m afraid that’s not an option.”

Cassandra flicks Wade aside effortlessly and Logan’s instantly on alert, claws extended at his side. You attempt to direct your powers at her, trying to defuse the anger simmering below her surface. She rolls her neck and glances at you, intrigue in her eyes. 

“Oh, aren’t you interesting,” she says, effortlessly flicking your powers aside. “I wonder what treats you have hiding in that mind of yours.”

Cassandra steps closer to you, her calculating stare flicking over your face. She lifts one hand up to you and from behind her, Logan growls and moves to attack. You watch, powerless, as she pins Logan to the ground with his own claws. 

She tsks and looks down at him, “That’s enough out of you.”

And then, she’s in your mind, every nerve ending in your body on fire, ready to consume you whole. 

You’re standing in a library, Cassandra at your side. Shelves extend as far as the eye can see, fading into an infinite distance. You walk aimlessly along the shelves, pausing at the entrance of a room simply titled “Logan”. 

“Oh, now this is something,” you hear Cassandra say from beside you. “This is quite the collection you have.”

Your fingers reach out and touch the spines, the briefest flickers of memories emanating from their covers. “I’ve known him for so long,” you murmur. “Been with him through so much.”

You pause in front of one book, the urge to open it nearly overwhelming. Pulling it from the shelf, the pages flutter open and you gasp, the memories of that life flooding your brain. 

You and Logan were married in this life. He worked a simple job, construction. There were no X-men, no missions, no danger. He kept his mutation a secret, showing only you when the memories got too rough, too unmanageable. You were his anchor. You had two kids—girls. And oh, how he loved them. Both of them wrapped effortlessly around his heart from before they were even born.

Tears spring to your eyes as the warmth of those memories flood through you. “I loved that life,” you whisper, putting the book back on the shelf.

“And who wouldn’t?” Cassandra agrees, placing her hand on your shoulder. “So effortless his love for you. So different from now.”

You glance over at her, confusion drawn on your face. False empathy tugs at Cassandra’s sympathetic smile. “Are you even sure he cares for you now? This Logan is so broken, more broken and unloveable than all these other Logans, hm?”

Shaking your head, you try to resist her efforts to batter you, to convince you your soul’s purpose is not worth it. Not worth him. “That’s not true. They’re all worthy. All capable and deserving of love,” you say, your fingers trailing along another spine. “Even this one. Especially this one.”

Cassandra’s face contorts then and…

She’s wrenched from your mind and you fall to your knees, blinking up as you see Wade holding Cassandra from behind, one hand holding Jaggernaut’s helmet to her head. 

Your mind still spins as Logan and Wade confront her, their conversation a jumble in your mind. But you don’t miss her saying either they kill her, or she kills them. Finding the strength to stand, you rise and place your hand on Wade’s arm.

“If I stay,” you start, focusing only on Cassandra and ignoring the press of Logan’s gaze into your skin, “Will you let them go?”

Logan reaches for you and you pull your gaze from Cassandra long enough to press your palm against this chest. You meet his eyes, silently pleading with him to let you continue. 

“Will you?” you repeat, unable to keep the pleading out of your tone.

Cassandra laughs bitterly. “You love him that much? To sacrifice yourself to save him? That Logan, out of all of them?”

You nod, feeling the tears burn in your eyes. “I love him that much,” you reply softly.

Logan grabs your hand then, forcing you to look at him. “Don’t,” he chokes out, voice thick with unspoken emotion, “Don’t do this.”

You smile softly as you reach up and cup his cheek, his beard rough against your palm. You don’t miss the way he briefly nuzzles into your touch, eyes fluttering shut as he sighs. “I love you, Logan. In all my lives, in this one and in the next one, too.” The first tear slips down your cheek as you look up at him. “I promise I’ll find you again, Logan. I always do.”

You press a kiss to his mouth, soft and gentle. It lingers for a moment, a desperate, bittersweet exchange as Logan tries to memorize the feel of you. His hands grip your waist, clutching almost hard enough to bruise, but you relish the pain. 

Wade stands beside you both, uncharacteristically silent, his hands still holding Cassandra in place. His usual banter is gone, the weight of the moment not lost on him. “This is the worst fucking idea anyone has ever had,” he mutters, but his tone is soft. “And I’ve had some pretty terrible ideas.”

Cassandra regards you with a mixture of amusement and curiosity. “If I let them go, you’ll stay here with me in the Void. Be my ally.”

You nod, “Yes.”

Cassandra’s eyes narrow, calculating, weighing her options. Finally she sighs, “Fine. But you know…no one will remember this little sacrifice of yours. The next Logan won’t even know you.”

Logan growls and you squeeze his hand in gentle reassurance. “It’s okay,” you whisper, your voice finally breaking. “I’ll remember enough for the both of us.”

You step away from Logan, your heart shattering with every step. Wade lets go of Cassandra and you feel the weight of your decision settle heavily against your shoulders. 

Cassandra pulls something from her pocket, slipping it onto her fingers. Before you, a portal opens up, just outside the boundaries of the room. Outside, the raging storm that is Alioth grows near and in that moment, you realize Cassandra was playing a game of her own.

“I figure,” she says, straightening the lapels of her jacket, “that they have approximately four seconds before they’re through.”

Your eyes flick to Logan and you memorize every detail, every emotion written across his face. With one final nod, he tears his gaze from you and he runs towards the portal, Wade alongside him.

And then, darkness consumes all.

+++

You’re unsure how long you’ve been out. The last thing you remember was Alioth screaming towards you, giving you barely enough time to cocoon yourself from his rage.

Cassandra is gone.

Wade is gone.

And Logan—Logan is gone.

You open your eyes and find Remy standing above you. He offers you his hand and helps you to stand. “C’mon, chère,” he says, nodding towards the open portal behind him, “Let’s go home.”

You’re not sure where home is any more, not without Logan, but you don’t have the strength to argue. From the moment you wound up here in the Void, you’ve been looking for a way out. Now that you have one, you know you need to take it. 

Accepting Remy’s hand, you join him through the portal.

You stumble into a familiar room and are greeted warmly by a smiling TVA agent. She’s unlike the first TVA agent you met, her presence comforting as she says your name. “We heard you’ve had quite the adventure.” She looks over towards Remy. “Mr. LeBeau, if you’ll follow this agent here.”

Remy leaves with he other agent, turning towards you with a wink. “Enjoy your man for me, yeah?”

Your heart flutters in your chest and you look towards the agent, trying to suppress the hope you feel in your chest. She smiles and rests a comforting hand on your shoulder. From her pocket she pulls out a small device, pressing a few buttons on the pad. Before you a different portal opens and she gestures towards it.

“Welcome home.”

+++

You stand in front of the apartment door and hesitate before knocking. Your nerves flutter uncomfortably in your belly even though it’s been less than two days since you last saw Logan in the Void. But you’re out now—you both are—and the fear nags at you that maybe this isn’t what he wants. That you aren’t what he wants. 

You stuff that thought down with a shake of your head. Raising your hand, you rap against the door three times and let out a shaky breath. When he opens the door, you feel as if the air has left your lungs and you forget to breathe. Your heart aches at the sight of him. 

Logan stops short, his face falling into one of pure disbelief and all he can do is stare at you.

“Is that my stripper?” you hear Wade call from farther into the apartment. Logan continues to stare at you as Wade pops up behind him, his face lighting up in surprise. “Oh, hey cupcake! Didn’t expect to—“

“Get out,” Logan growls, turning his head slightly in Wade’s direction, his eyes never leaving yours. 

From over Logan’s shoulder, Wade wiggles his eyebrows. “Ah, looking for some afternoon delight?” he coos, slinging his arm over Logan’s shoulder and patting his chest. “This guy has been jerkin’ it constan—“

You hear the sknit of Logan’s claws as they unsheathe into Wade’s thighs. “Ah, fuck! Fuck!” Wade curses. “You’re supposed to be penetrating her, not me!”

“Get. Out,” Logan repeats, retracting his claws. 

“Fine.” Wade pushes past Logan’s frame, limping slightly as his wounds heal themselves. “You’re lucky Blind Al’s already out playing Bingo. Or selling herself for blow. I don’t actually know her schedule,” he comments as he walks down the hallway. “Glad you’re home, cupcake.”

Logan barely waits until Wade is out of sight before tugging at the hem of your shirt and pulling you towards him. Your gasp dies on your lips as he drags you inside, shutting the door with his foot and pushing you up against the rough wood. Then his mouth is on yours and it’s warm and wet and wonderful. 

His hands cup your face, fingers moving to tangle in your hair and you feel him everywhere. You whine as he nips lightly at your chin before trailing his lips back up your jaw, licking into your mouth as he kisses you deep. 

Your fingers scramble for purchase, fisting themselves into the fabric of his button-down flannel. 

There’s a desperation and urgency bleeding from him, as if he can’t drink you in fast enough, or hard enough, or long enough to satiate the longing that’s within him. And you’re feeling it too, an ache growing deeper in your belly, a need to be consumed by him fully and you whine into his mouth because he’s not nearly close enough to you.

A thigh slips between your legs as he kisses along your jaw and down the column of your throat, a moan falling from your lips as you greedily seek friction. 

“I can’t believe you’re here,” Logan husks against your shoulder, pulling your hips harder against his clothed thigh. 

Your hands cup the sides of his face, your fingers scratching lightly against his beard. You force him to look at you, his pupils blown wide. “I always come to you,” you say softly. “I always come home.”

He kisses you softly then, his mouth slow over yours and he drops his thigh from between your leg. You whine at the loss and he pulls back. “C’mere,” he says, grabbing your hand and leading you further into he apartment. “I’m not fucking you for the first time against a door.”

You follow him to the bedroom, your chest heaving with ragged breaths and you can feel the prickle of anticipation along your spine as he turns back to look at you. His eyes never leave yours as he shrugs off the flannel and pulls his t-shirt over his head. Your eyes trace the lines of his chest, the strong definition of his muscles, following the line of hair that leads to the top of his jeans. As you bite your lip, you hear his chuckle, “My eyes are up here.”

“Mmm, yeah they are,” you start, tugging your shirt off and shimmying your pants over your hips, “but the view down there is nice, too.”

Logan reaches for you, his large hands skimming over your hips, over the flesh of your ass and under your thighs, lifting you up and forcing your to wrap your legs around his waist. With an easy flick of his fingers, he’s unclasped your bra and you toss it aside with the rest of your clothes. 

Kneeling on the bed, he lays you down, kissing his way down your stomach, his nose nuzzling along the top of your panties. “Do you have any fucking idea how sweet you smell?” His mouth is hot against your skin and he laughs as you tilt your hips up towards him. “You want me to fuck you with my tongue? Lap at you until you’re seeing stars?”

Molten desire shoots down your spine and you can feel the slick between your thighs. God, the mouth on him was going to be the death of you. 

You prop yourself up onto your elbows and look down at him. “Just fucking touch me already,” you whine, and you hate how desperate you sound. “Haven’t we waited long enough?”

He presses a wet, open mouthed kiss to your inner thigh before dragging his nose along the center of your clothed cunt. You inhale sharply as he kisses over your clit before trailing his fingers along your hip bones and pulling the fabric down. His warm hands palm along your thighs and he opens you up, staring down at you with hunger in his eyes. And then his mouth is on you, his tongue licking a hot stripe through your folds before sucking your clit into his mouth. 

“Oh, fuck,” you moan as his mouth continues to lap at you, pleasure tingling low in your belly and spreading through your limbs.

Logan hums. “Sweetest pussy I’ve ever tasted, sweetheart.” His tongue dips down, collecting the arousal at your entrance. “I could die happy between these thighs.”

You trail your hands down over your chest, briefly palming each breast before you continue down and sink your fingers into Logan’s hair. His groan rumbles through you and you don’t miss the way his hips start to rut against the mattress, seeking friction. 

His mouth and tongue continue to move over you, long, slow licks punctuated by gentle sucks and flicks over your clit and you can’t stop the grind of your hips against his face. You feel his smirk against you as one thick finger finally sinks inside your walls, nudging that spot deep inside that makes you squirm.

Another finger slips inside you and a low whine spills from your lips. 

“You’re beautiful like this, you know that,” he says, voice rough, thumb replacing his tongue against your clit as his fingers continue pumping. “All blissed out and needy and desperate to come on my fingers.”

His words zip through you as he fuck you with his hand and you bite your lip. “C’mon,” he purrs, “let me hear all those pretty sounds you make.”

Soft whimpers spill from your throat as he continues to work you, that pull in your lower belly growing stronger and stronger. His hand never stilling, he kisses his way up your body, pulling a nipple into his mouth and then you’re coming, cunt clenching around his fingers. 

Logan licks into your mouth to steal your cries as he continues to work you through your orgasm. Your thighs clamp around his forearm, the pleasure overwhelming. 

He finally stills, pulling his fingers from you and you whimper at the loss. You watch through half lidded eyes as he licks his fingers clean of your slick and you feel that flame reignite in your belly. 

“Take your pants off,” you demand, breathless, pushing at his chest. 

Logan laughs, but allows you to push him onto his back. “You always so bossy after you come?”

You fumble at his belt, undoing his buckle and unzipping his jeans before shoving them down his hips. “Make me do it again and find out,” you taunt as his cock springs free.

He kicks his pants the rest of the way off and you sit back on your heels and admire him for a moment. Your eyes trail from his broad shoulders, down the contours of his chest and follow that line of hair down his stomach to between his thighs, where his cock stands, thick and ready. 

“I will never get tired of looking at you,” you sigh, raking your nails down his thighs, deliberately not touching him where you know he wants it the most. “You’re so beautiful, Logan.”

Whatever response he has, dies in his throat as you finally wrap your hand around his cock, giving him one long, firm stroke. He’s hot and heavy and you’re aching to feel him inside you. But not yet. Leaning down, your eyes meet his and you trace your tongue along the underside of his cock, tasting the salt on his skin.

“Fuckin’ hell,” Logan curses, unable to stop the thrust of his hips, chasing your mouth. 

You wrap your lips around the head, swirling your tongue over the slit and collecting the precum there before taking as much of him in your mouth as you can. Logan hisses through his teeth, fingers winding their way into your hair to help guide your movements. 

“You’re so warm and wet, sweetheart,” he groans. “But I don’t want to come in your mouth.”

You give him one last stroke as you release him from your mouth and climb up to sit on his thighs. Logan pulls you forward by your hips and you gasp as your cunt slides across his cock. 

“Line me up,” he instructs and you obey without hesitation. 

Gripping him in your hand, you guide him to your entrance, notching him inside before slowly sinking down atop him. A sob chokes in your throat at the thick feel of him inside you, stretching you, making you feel complete. Your entire existence boils down to where he’s joined with you and you relish the burn.

His hands are everywhere as you start to move, caressing your thighs, your hips, up to your breasts and back down, tracing a map on your skin only his fingers can read. Praise falls from his lips in an almost nonstop litany, telling you how wet you are, how tight, how warm, how good you’re making him feel.

“Do you want to know how you make me feel?” you ask, breathless. You look down at him through half lidded eyes and find him just as flushed and wanton as you. “How you’ve always made me feel?”

You continue to rock back and forth on his cock, slow, deliberate movements that leave you wanting, needing more. Logan shifts his hips and finds the leverage to fuck up into you, the deep drag of his cock against your walls making you throw your head back and moan. 

“Fuck,” he growls, his fingers sinking deeper into the flesh of your hips, pulling you somehow impossibly closer. “Show me, sweetheart.” 

You brace your hands against his chest, raking your fingers through the damp hair there, feeling his heart beat beneath your palms. Leaning down, you capture his mouth with yours, the kiss sloppy as he continues to thrust up into you. You move your hands up his neck, your fingers collecting the sweat along his jaw and then, “Feel, Logan.”

It starts slow, an almost faint heat spreading from your fingertips as they ghost over his skin, your power beginning to pulse in time with your heartbeat. Logan gasps and his rhythm falters as the first wave of emotion hits him. You slow, too, your hips barely moving as you run your fingers down from his jaw, over the column of his throat and back to his chest. 

Your palms rest against his ribs as you continue to pour into him all the love and passion he’s ever shown you over centuries. Logan stares up at you in reverence, his face soft as he runs his hands up your sides, over your breasts. He tugs you down towards him, his mouth hovering over yours.

“Do you feel, Logan,” you ask, your breath hot against his lips. “Do you feel how much you love you have in you?”

He draws your bottom lip into his mouth, biting softly once, before capturing your mouth fully, kissing you deep. You hum as his tongue swipes against yours and his fingers tangle in your hair. 

A gasp pulls from your throat as Logan wraps his arms around you and flips your position, forcing your legs around his waist as he begins to thrust into you again in earnest. You feel him deep in this position, each thrust of his cock against your walls hitting that perfect spot inside of you. 

“It’s too much,” he groans into your skin. “Never…never felt like this.”

You rake your nails along his back, relishing in the growl that falls from this throat. “It always feels like this,” you gasp, drawing your power back. 

His arms slide under your shoulders, anchoring you in place as his hips continue to thrust into you. It’s lewd almost, the slapping of skin against skin and the wet noises from where you’re joined. His breath is hot and damp against your skin where his mouth hovers over the pulse point in your neck. 

Your fingers snake into the short strands of hair at the back of his neck and your other hand slips in between your bodies, reaching for your clit. 

“That’s it,” he moans, “use those fingers to get yourself off on my cock.”

You can feel where he’s sliding thickly into your cunt, the wiry hairs at the base of his cock damp with your arousal, and you begin to rub in time with his thrusts. Pleasure zips along your spine, every cell in your body afire at his touch. You feel that telltale tug low in your belly and you know you’re not going to last much longer. 

He slides his hands down from your shoulders, following the curve of your spine, forcing you to arch your back. Taking the opportunity before him, he swirls his tongue over one nipple, then the other as he palms the flesh of your hips in his hands, angling your hips further up into his. A keening whine falls from your lips as he somehow thrusts deeper into you, making your legs shake. 

Logan nudges your hand away from your clit, replacing your fingers with his own as he pushes you closer and closer to the edge. His eyes are focused on the sight of his cock thrusting into you and the slick smeared across your thighs. 

“Logan,” you gasp, “I’m so close.”

“I know, sweetheart,” he rasps, dragging his gaze up to your face, “I got you. Takin’ me so well, so tight. Gonna spend the rest of my life tellin’ you how fucking good you are.”

His words tip you over the edge, your orgasm rolling through you as you spasm down on his cock, his name falling from your lips. He fucks you through your orgasm, each thrust of his hips sending aftershocks of pleasure along your limbs as he chases his own release. Logan’s thrusts grow erratic and you reach for him, grasping at his forearms, pulling him down to you. 

“Come for me, Logan,” you murmur in his ear. “I wanna feel you come.”

With one final thrust, he comes with a groan, forehead pressed against yours as he spills himself deep within you. You can feel cock spasm as he lazily thrusts through his orgasm, using your body to wring out the last of his pleasure. You hold him close, pressing open mouthed kisses to his jaw as he finally stills within you. 

Careful not to crush you, Logan pulls you to him as he rolls onto his side. He doesn’t pull out, tugging your leg over his hip to keep you close and full. 

You smile up at him, brushing the damp hair away from his forehead. He sighs at your touch, a content sound that tugs at your heart. 

“You really love me in every universe?” he asks softly, brushing his nose against yours. 

“Yes.”

“Even this one?”

“Especially this one.” 

You don’t know what the rest of this life holds, but you do know one thing—wherever he goes, you’ll be right there with him. 

[dilf-rot]

Avoidant Attachment

based on Anon request :  could you do a fic of meeting Logan and wade in the void and joining the team? Logan and you are into each other but are kinda awkward hide behind being mean to each other wades so over it later on smuttt <3333

Word Count: 5841 

Tags: Wolverine x Reader, Worst!Wolverine x Reader, Logan howlett x Reader, Fem!Reader (kinda?), Wade is here too, Meeting in the Void, Deadpool 3, Deadpool and Wolverine, Laura is Also here, 5 people in a one bedroom apartment is a great idea, Althea is here briefly, dogpool mention, slower burn but like not really, mutual pining, Wade and Laura as wingmen, insults as flirting, eventual smut, One bed trope included, P in V, Riding

AN: This one took a lot longer than I was expecting, probably since I haven’t written Wade before and I didn’t want it to suck, and also because I was quite busy irl. Regardless, thank you for the request and your patience, Hope you don’t mind my interpretation of the prompt<3

If you enjoy my work consider sending me a tip at https://ko-fi.com/rotwrites (Not required by any means, writing requests are still free!)

MDNI 18+

—------------------

The Void. Boring as Hell, and yet somehow worse than hell. At least Hell would grant you company, shitty company, but better than the dust and trash here. You don’t even remember why you got put here. Probably some bullshit you weren’t even responsible for. You had a pretty lame set up, just a hole in the ground really. And you’d find garbage to shift through, look for food. You had managed to do pretty well on your own for a decent amount of time. Other than being lonely, and the occasional breakdown, things weren’t so bad.

The air was stale and unremarkable, as was the sky, no sign of oncoming doom or any excitement for the day. Or so you thought. 

Over the horizon of dusty dirt and forgotten garbage, appeared two silhouettes. 

As they approached, inching closer and closer you debated on whether you should interact or just ignore, they didn’t seem like they had been here long. 

You watched closely waiting for your moment to make a move. Listening to them as they approached.

Deadpool. Common, usually annoying. 

But the one with him. That’s a rather rare sight. You had never seen one of him before.

They seemed like they were on a mission, maybe trying to escape from here. If you could escape, maybe you could return to something approaching a normal life again. 

You decide to take the chance.

“Hello,” You pop out from your little shelter. Both men jolt into action, blades and guns drawn. The man in yellow, the interesting rare man, had blades coming out of his hands. “Oh no, not a threat.” 

They regard each other and then put the weapons away.

“Knew I smelt something,” his voice was rough and it added to his appeal for sure. 

“And you didn’t want to say anything? Some blood hound you are!” Deadpool spoke, punching the gruff one in the shoulder.

“Sorry, I know you’re a Deadpool. But you are?” You point to him. 

“Logan,” “Wolverine,” they speak out in tandem. 

“Right, so… what’re you doing this far out?” 

“Not telling you random dirt dweller,” Deadpool looked back towards Logan, and seemed to be weighing his options.

“Ok well, if you decide to be friendly I could offer my help.”

“You don’t look like you’d be of much help,” Logan retorted as he looked you over. You were obviously smaller and not as strong as either of them, but you had some tricks up your sleeve.

“Ouch, I would be offended if you didn’t have hair like kitty ears.” You pointed up at Logan’s hair and he seemed surprised by your response. “I’ve been in the void longer than you, I’m sure I know some things that would be useful to you,”

“Listen, Kid-”

“Yeah, me and Kitty Cat here are trying to get back at that bald freak show of a woman and escape this hell. So unless you know how to do that, I’d stay out of it, dust bunny.” 

You laugh and look at the state of them, confused but still combative, barely holding it together and hardly friends. “That’s a good one. Good luck with Cassandra then, Ketchup and Mustard.”

Deadpool gasps and Logan seems to have the inklings of a smile on his face but it quickly fades when you turn to look at him. You sit down on a nearby piece of rubble and watch as they take a few steps away and start to argue about what the plan is. You smile and wave when they look back at you.

“Ok, so what do you know?” Deadpool asks, rushing back up to you. And so you do your best to fill him in on as much as you know about the void itself and Cassandra. All of which seems to not be that useful to him as he just sort of brushes it off and continues, “Well as much as I’d love to have you on the team sunshine, seems like Wolvie over there isn’t too keen on it.” He points over to Logan, who turns away and kicks some dust and debris around. “But, between you and me, he’s just bad with girls. Especially pretty ones with quick mouths.” 

You blush a bit but return a quick retort, “That’s fine, not like I have anything to escape back to anyway. Good luck, random Deadpool.”

“It’s Wade.” 

“Right,” You wave as he runs back to Logan. You imagined it wouldn’t be that long before you see them again, mostly because you had planned on following them, or at least trailing them for long enough to find a new place to stay. 

—-----------

You meet them again at the safe house with Laura, she drove them here and plopped them down without a word. She had been very welcoming when you had wandered this way in search of food, and let you join them for a quick meal. You had told her that you saw Wolverine, and her interest had been piqued. She explained to you everything that had happened before she was sent here, and the two of you bonded over not having something to return too. Although now, with this Wolverine sitting in the same space, it seemed like her chances were looking up.

You figured you’d let them be once they woke up, and wait it out. By the time everyone had finished their speeches, you just stood behind them and waved. You didn’t have much to say, everyone else had much more valid reasoning for wanting to escape than you. You could hardly remember life before the void, if you even had one. Luckily, nobody ever bothered to press you about it, probably assuming you had forgotten for a valid reason. So when Deadpool- Wade, asked you for your input, you sort of just shrugged. Listening to them all plotting was entertaining at least, you were sure you would be of much use, maybe an extra distraction, at the very least you could cover them enough to get the job done. 

You noticed Logan slip out with a bottle of liquor in his hands. You gave Laura a nod before following him outside.

He had started a fire, and was sitting watching the flames.

“So how’d someone like you end up with someone like that?” You gesture back up to the house, as you stand against a tree, watching the fire flicker in front of him.

“It’s complicated.” He says taking a swig from the bottle.

“It always is.” Silence runs through the trees, nothing but crackling fire and the dead stale air of the void. “At least he seems fun.”

“Hah,” He breathes out.

“If that’s what you’re into.”

“No.” His gruff demeanor drops for a second, the bottle halting as he brings it down from his lips.

“No?”

He looks you over, before turning away.

“Well, I’ll leave you to it. I’ll say a prayer for your liver,” You reference the bottle in your hand. He nods, and you walk back up to the house, passing Laura on your way in. She’d probably have better luck cracking him than you.

You wondered if you would ever have a chance to mean something to him, to be more than some small tag along he sniffed out in the dirt. If he would ever find you to be a friend, an ally, someone to talk to, depend on. But you hardly just met, and hardly discussed anything other than half baked insults and nihilistic opinions of the void and your futures.  

—----------------

Wade and Logan had somehow convinced the TVA after everything with Cassandra to allow you and Laura to stay in this universe, and you weren’t sure how or why they wanted you to come along. Laura made sense, he felt responsible for her, and to make up for losing her Logan, to make up for missed moments. 

You? You hardly had a clue why they wanted you here. Or why they offered to let you stay with them until you found something else. You were surprised that Althea would agree to having 5 people sleeping in a tiny apartment. You appreciated the shelter, you were just very very confused by the entire situation. 

“Hello my little floor sleeper, how were your dreams? You were moaning about something…” He slides up next to you in the kitchen as you're pouring a cup of coffee.

“Hi, Wade.” You sip from the mug, not answering his nonsense.

“So,” he jumps up to sit on the counter in front of you, “You gonna spill? Tell me all about your honey badger dream fling? I was surprised you didn’t just wake up and mount him right there on the floor.”

“Shut up, I don’t even know what you’re talking about.”

“Come on, the three of us sleep in the same tiny space, I hear everything.” 

“I’m gonna steal the couch space from you if you don’t drop it.”

Laura had been given a space in Althea’s room since the boys figured she deserved it, and You, Logan, and Wade were stuck in the living room. Rotating between the couch and cheap air mattresses, usually you just stayed on the floor and let Logan and Wade fight over the couch space. Compared to sleeping on grass and dirt in the void, an air mattress was a definite improvement. As long as Mary Puppins didn’t lick you to death in your sleep, it wasn’t a bad deal. 

“Come on, just admit you like Loggie Bear and I’ll get you some alone time with or without the couch.” 

“Don’t you have anything better to do?”

“Currently, no.”

You sigh, and walk towards the bathroom to change, locking the door behind you as Wade continues to ramble and try to get you to slip and say something about Logan. But you won’t, even if he is right.

There were many nights where you thought about climbing into bed next to him and pressing your face against his chest, breathing in his scent, being held close to him by those utterly ridiculous arms, having him place warm chaste kisses against the top of your head. But you wouldn’t.  

You hardly knew him, and what you knew about him led you to believe that he was not the kind of man to be interested in someone like you. Although he had become more pleasant after having been invited into Wade’s life. Some days he still was that gruff sort of emotionally unavailable man you met in the void, but other days he’s sweet and gentle and kind, usually whenever Laura’s around. It’s as if he’s been given a reason to live again and he’s navigating how to be a person again. 

After you get dressed, you grab your bag and head out, avoiding Wade and his nonsense. You told Laura you’d meet her after her class and go to a cafe she’s been wanting to try. It’s just down the street from the apartment, but the walk is nice and gives you time to get your thoughts back in order. Trying to keep Wade’s pestering from seeping in and getting you to slip up.

When you get to the cafe, Laura is waiting for you outside. You go in and are met with soft florals, sleek wood finish, and the overwhelming smell of coffee. It is so cozy and bright, a welcome break from the dim and crowded apartment. Laura orders something you didn’t know was a thing, and you opt for a simple latte. She finds this funny and smiles at you, “Don’t you want something sweet?”

“No, I’m alright.” You lean against the wall as you wait for your order.

“What’s with you and Logan’s hatred for sugar?” She asks as she slides over to stand next to you.

“I don’t hate sugar, I’m just not in the mood for it.” You shrug and stare at the counter.

“At least you get milk with your coffee, better than black like Logan drinks.” She laughs again and grabs your order when it’s called. The two of you find a nice table by the window and enjoy watching the people passing by. When a particularly handsome man passes by, Laura perks up and asks, “How about that one?”

“He’s alright, not really my type though,” You shrug your shoulders and take another sip from your cup.

“You’re right, I already know your type.” The grin on your face reminds you of how Wade greets you in the mornings.

“Oh yeah? What's that?” You look at her quizzically. 

“Starts with an L and ends with an ogan”

You groan, “Don’t I get enough of that from Wade?”

“I think everyone can see it but you, even Al.” She looks up at you from her drink, in a way you both know she’s right.

“Wow,” is all you can muster in response. 

“I don’t know why you won’t do something about it, and look if you’re worried about me, don’t be. I give you full permission to pursue my not Dad kinda Dad.” 

You quickly try to change the subject, and once your coffee's finished and you’ve loitered around, you walk back in a knowing silence. 

You do have some sort of crush on Logan, but you feel like it would be too ideal to expect him to share those feelings. Especially when you aren’t one hundred percent sure what those feelings even are. He is exceptionally good looking, and well built. If it weren’t for his confrontational attitude and lack of expression, you’d be so certain in your attraction. But there is something blocking you from fully admitting it to yourself.

Maybe it is simply your lack of self, having to build back an identity from nothing, that keeps you from knowing if He is it for you. Even though sometimes he is all you can think about. When you catch him playing dad with Laura. When you catch him helping Althea, a gentle smile plastered on his face as he speaks soft and gentlemanly. When he falls asleep on the couch with Mary Puppins in his arms. The images of the side he works so hard to hide, the soft domesticity he allows himself so rarely. That is what really sticks in your brain.

Along with the less than innocent images you have carved into your brain. Like that time he forgot you were home and came out from the bathroom only wrapped in a towel. The water clinging to his muscles and dripping from his hair. Or when he had his sleeves rolled up while walking around the apartment, the skin shiny from sweat, and all you could think about was what it would feel like to be held in place by them.

When you remember yourself, both you and Laura have made it back to the apartment. 

—-------

You were surprised that for once, everyone was home for dinner, and it wasn’t even a special occasion. Wade decided that it would be easiest to order some pizzas to avoid having to cook. You didn’t complain, even if you would have preferred a home cooked meal, pizza was fine. Of course he had gone to pick it up and left you with Logan, Laura, and Althea. She, reasonably so, had her spot already picked out in the armchair by the window. Logan and Laura were sitting on opposite sides of the couch, watching something on tv. All the while you sat on the floor, legs folded over each other, leaning back on your hands. 

“Why don’t you come sit on the couch?” Laura had asked, and you knew she already knew the answer, which was that you didn’t want to be so close to Logan that you would be touching. You had been cultivating a very specific environment with him, one where if you could just avoid any close contact with him, you could pretend like your heart didn't ache at the thought of him.

“I’m good here,” You didn’t bother looking away from the tv, which you weren’t even watching. 

“Come on,” Laura patted the cushion next to her. 

“Maybe I don’t want to sit next to the cat,” You looked over your shoulder at them. Logan was leaning back into the cushions behind him.

“I don’t want to sit next to you either,” His tone was only slightly malicious.

“Good.”

“Just sit on the couch,” Laura insisted. 

“No. He reeks, I think the animal dna gave him the scent too,” You waved your hand in front of your nose.

“But I don’t smell,” Laura sniffed her shirt.

“You reek too, ya know?” Logan pointed to Mary Puppins in the corner, “Probably cause you’re always sleeping next to that.” 

“Thanks. She’s actually a better roommate than you.” 

“You all stink,” Althea commented from her spot. 

As you stood up to walk towards the kitchen the door swung open. “PIZZA TIME!” Wade shouted, carrying the stack of boxes into the apartment. 

You ate mostly in silence, as Wade rambled on about something or someone that you had no interest in. Lately he was obsessed with those trashy reality tv shows were people all live in one house and things go wrong one way or another. You felt like you were already living in that, no need to watch strangers go through it too. It’s not that you felt like you were walking on eggshells, or that you weren’t welcome. More so that you were waiting for this whole thing to blow up in your face. 

—---------

It was late in the morning when you managed to roll out of your bed. Logan and Wade had already been awake and were trying their hardest to be quiet. Rather, Logan was quiet, and Wade was not. You didn’t hear what they were talking about, only that Logan mumbled something under his breath and Wade turned to see you sitting up on the floor.

“Good morning sleeping beauty! Pancakes or waffles?” He turned to you and you saw he was wearing one of those tacky ‘kiss the chef’ aprons.

You rubbed the sleep from your eyes and stood up to stretch, “Whichever you’re less likely to burn.” 

Wade feigned offense, as you walked into the bathroom to brush your teeth and hair. “How do you manage to sleep so soundly down there?” Wade called from the kitchen as you walked back into the living room.

“I don’t.” You pulled out a chair and sat at the dining table, still groggy. “Which is why I need to get a job, and my own place.” 

“You’re leaving me?” Wade gasped, and crossed his hands over his heart. “How could you? What about the kids?” He started making a big fuss about it as if you hadn’t told him before that this had been your plan. “I can’t believe you would leave me alone with honey badger and the little ones! I can’t raise them alone.”

“Everyone that lives here is an adult, Wade.”

“Let her be,” Laura said as she slid into the kitchen and sat next to you. She smiled at you and nodded. 

Wade and Logan joined you at the table, sliding the plates of pancakes to you and her. They weren’t burnt, which was progress. 

—--------

You had spent the day job hunting, and apartment hunting, which was not as important since you kinda needed the money first. The cafe you had been to with Laura was hiring, though not having much of a resume due to the whole void and lack of a world thing, probably meant your chances of getting hired were slim. You submitted an application anyway, and to a few other shops and things in the area. Hopefully something would stick.

There really weren't many options in the area for apartments either, but when you ran into the building manager they had mentioned that one of the other units on your floor might be opening up soon. It wasn’t ideal to be in the same building as Wade and the others, but it was your only lead at the moment. 

When Wade got home, he had a sort of look in his eyes, which you had learned meant something was up. And when Laura came home with the same sort of look, you were even more suspicious. 

“What are you two doing?” You asked, approaching them in the kitchen.

“Well I thought I could do something nice for you,” Wade had his hands behind his back, holding something hidden from you. “And Logan,” he whispered but you still caught it.

“What?” Logan appeared from the bathroom, and leaned against the wall.

Wade handed you a piece of paper, “Tada!” You looked over the paper, it was a reservation confirmation for a hotel. “A magical getaway for you and the kitty cat to work out your differences at an all inclusive resort!”

“This is a Best Western.” The dates on the sheet were for tomorrow, Friday, until Sunday morning. 

“Did I stutter?” Wade stood with his hands on his hips.

“Who said I wanted to do this?” Logan asked, coming up behind you to look at the paper. He was so close you could almost feel his warmth against you. 

“Come on, you complain about the air mattress all the time,” Laura started, “This is your chance for a real bed.”

“Ok? So why do I have to go with her,” He was looming behind you, and the deep vibrations of his voice made your cheeks redden.

“It was cheaper to have two guests than one.” 

“Fine,” He walked away. You were also surprised that he would so quickly agree to something like this. As it was so obviously a set up. A plot against you.

“Perfect! Now go get packing!” Wade slapped you on the shoulder, and smiled. You knew this was all his idea. 

—-------

You were expecting this to be a set up, but when you opened the door and saw only one bed you knew it to be true. Logan walks in while you hold the door and he drops down onto the edge of the bed. You sigh as you drag your bag in and make a mental note to get back at Wade later. You turn the TV on to try to dispel the oppressive silence in the room, but all that's on the hotel cable is questionably written Hallmark movies. Logan shifts on the bed, and you hear it creak under his weight. You wonder what he would feel like on top of you, if he would crush you entirely.

 You sit in the chair that's against the wall, peering out through the cracks in the curtains to stare out at the parking lot, the sun is low against the horizon, and it’s surprisingly quiet. You can hear the fabric of the cheap hotel sheets rustling under Logan, along with the sound of his breathing, as he leans back into the bed, and you wonder how long you’ll be able to survive in a small room alone with him.

Despite having slept in the same room for the past few months, this is an entirely different situation. There’s no Wade, or Laura, or Mary puppins, or Althea. It is just you and him, in a hotel room, with one bed. Which was certainly a set up from Wade, in his quests to get you to admit your feelings for Logan. 

“Are you hungry?” You try to break the silence in the most mundane way possible, at least to save yourself from the discomfort.

“I could eat,”

“We could get room service?”

“Fine by me.” You toss him the menu and once you both decide on what to get you call it in. It was going to take a while, so you decided to take advantage of the luxury of a hotel shower. Telling Logan you wouldn’t be too long and to let you know if the food came before you were done. 

The shower is nice, clean white tiles, and a rather standard sort of set up. It is nice to have some time to yourself, despite Logan being in the other room, you try to allow yourself this time to relax. Letting the hot water soak into your skin and soothe your aches and pains. The sound of the water blocking out any thoughts or concerns about the current situation, letting you forget, at least momentarily, that you would be having to sort out the sleeping arrangements. The hotel soap is tropical, but gentle, not too overwhelmingly sweet or fruity. As you lather up you can barely hear the sounds of the tv in the other room. It is so still and unremarkable. It feels normal, but somehow you wonder if you can ever shake the loneliness of time in the void, if you can allow yourself to have a normal life again. As if you can build back something you don’t even remember. As if you deserve this space that has miraculously been carved out for you, for some reason unbeknownst to you. 

Your thoughts are interrupted by the sound of a knock on the door, and the noise of Logan’s steps going to retrieve the room service. You quickly rinse and towel off, wrapping up your hair and sliding into the hotel bathrobe. 

“Food’s here,” Logan calls from behind the bathroom door. You wait until you hear him sit back down on the bed before opening the door and returning to your spot in the chair. 

The two of you eat in silence, and you can’t help but notice his eyes on you. You wonder if it is just in your head, or if he is actually trying to steal glances at you from across the way. You tried to ignore him, to stare fully at the trash tv movie, or at the weird art on the walls. Anything but him. If you could just pretend like he wasn’t there, you could make it for the next two nights. 

Although being this close to him in a small hotel room was not the ideal scenario to make forgetting about him easy. His breathing was audible. His presence was palpable. Even the vague scent of whiskey, cigars, and sweat was radiating from his position on the bed. Every little detail filled your mind with a fog, and all that was running through your brain was him. Over and over. Logan was everywhere. 

“You want to sleep soon?” His voice cut through the haze and you practically snapped your neck to look over at him.

“Hm? Oh… uh yeah probably.” You couldn’t help but look directly into his eyes, and you felt like you should disappear so that he couldn’t make you feel so foolish. So utterly trapped by the idea of him. “I can Just take the cushions from the chair and sleep on the floor,”

“That defeats the whole point of Wade’s gift.”

“So?” You started pulling the cushions of the chair and throwing them on the floor.

“You can sleep up here in the bed,” His voice was commanding. It was no longer a polite suggestion. “I don’t bite.”

“Right but-” As you go to protest, he interrupts.

“We can face opposite ways.” 

And so that is how you ended up in your pajama shorts and a ratty tee shirt, in bed with Logan. Who, true to his word, had his back facing you, and you had your back facing him. You could hear your heart beating, and no matter what you told yourself you could not get it to slow down. His presence, only inches away, was consuming you. Your mind is unable to stop racing with images of him holding you down, touching you, eating you alive. Making you squirm beneath him. You squirmed and thrashed trying to get comfortable enough to fall asleep, but even with your eyes screwed shut you couldn’t.

“Stop moving,” Logan’s voice was low and rumbly. He turned towards you, and laid his arm over your middle, pulling your back against him. “Go to sleep,” He murmured, his lips against the back of your head. 

He was warm and solid behind you, his body pressed to yours gently. His grasp on you wasn’t tight, but the sheer weight of him kept you firmly in place. As you tried to quell your heart and steady your breathing, you finally managed to drift asleep. And stay asleep, the entire night. 

—-----

The hotel was so quiet and peaceful, and clean, compared to the apartment. You managed to sleep soundly, and stay asleep until late in the morning. You had nearly forgotten about the situation, until you were met with Logan’s arm still snuggly wrapped around you as you opened your eyes.

His lips were pressed to the back of your head, his muscular frame firmly pressed against your back. His grip had tightened in the night, and he had pulled you even closer to himself. As you tried to remove yourself from him, he grumbled against you, “Stay.”

“Logan-” You tried to protest, to escape from the growing embarrassment and heat building up in your body.

“Just a bit longer.” He groaned, and pressed himself further into you. Your breath caught in your throat as you felt the growing bulge against your lower back. 

“Logan, please. Let me get up.” You pushed against his arm, and tried to pull yourself away but you were no match for him. 

“Why?” His voice was losing the grogginess of sleep, he was almost fully awake now. 

“Because-” You tried again to free yourself.

“Don’t you like me?” He sounded cocky, the question perhaps meaning to be playful but it stopped you dead in your tracks.

“I-” You stiffen, unable to react accordingly. 

“Then, stay.” Taken aback by his words and sudden clingy behavior, you realized that maybe Laura had been right, and everyone, including Logan, could see it. The way you had begun to feel about him, the almost immediate crush you developed as soon as you spotted him in the void, the way you felt thankful to have the chance at life again, simply because you wanted the chance to spend it with him.

You lay stuck in his arms for an unknown amount of time, the silence makes you a little uneasy, but his warmth and tenderness keeps you from leaping away. You didn’t imagine him to be someone so gentle, although you had glimpsed some of his more domestic behaviors when he thought it was just Him and Laura at home, and he would fuss over her like how you would want a good father to do. You felt safe and held by him, the frantic thoughts and anxieties being melted away into the warmth of him and his body against yours. 

As you nearly drift asleep again, he speaks, “Turn around.” And so you do, clumsily, but when you see his face those frantic thoughts and the racing of your heart begins again.  

“So pretty like this,” He murmurs, his face and voice soft. And before you can respond he closes the gap between you, his hand lacing in your hair and pulling you into him as he presses his lips against your gentle and steady. The brief taste of him makes you crave more.

As he pulls away to search your face for any signs of discomfort, you pull him back to you, your hands reaching up to his face to crash your lips into his. You whimper against him as his hands run down your spine and land on your hips, pulling you as close to him as he can. You can feel your arousal pooling between your thighs as he darts his tongue in to meet yours, twisting and tangling yourself with him as much as you can. The months of unspoken tension pouring out of you and dissipating as you desperately try to push yourself against him. You bring your hand down to paw at his bulge, darting your fingers across the fabric of his pajama pants. 

He smiles against you as he catches your hand with his and bring it under the waistband. You gasp when you realize he had not been wearing anything underneath his pants. Your fingers wrapping around him, the warmth and size of him in your hand making your head spin. 

His hands find their way to the edge of your shorts, pulling them and your panties down your legs as he breaks the kiss only for a moment to find his breath. His fingers trace up and down your thighs, pressing gentle circles into the skin before he pushes his hand between them, his palm pressing into you. The brief friction against your clit drawing a short moan from you. His hand rubs against you, the pressure making you grind down to meet him, craving more.

You whine as he pulls his hand away, only for him to grab your hips and pull you on top of him. His back against the bed as he brings you to straddle him. You kick your shorts and panties away, as he pulls his pants down further. His erection springing up against you. You can barely focus long enough to glimpse the size of him, too overcome with greed and arousal. 

You sink yourself onto his cock as his hands guide your hips. You moan at the stretch of it. He lets you catch your breath as you take him down to the hilt. His hands never leave you as he kisses and nips along your neck and shoulders, your head pressed against his shoulder as he begins to rock into you, whispering praises and filth against your skin. 

You grind your hips against his, the head of his cock dragging along that magic spot inside of you that causes the pleasure to build and the knot in your stomach to tighten. He growls in your ear as you tighten and pulse around him. You can feel the pressure building, making your head spin. He slips his fingers into your mouth and you greedily accept them, sucking and licking and kissing along them. He removes them and a trail of your saliva beads down them. He brings them between you to rub circles on your clit. The sensation dizzying, as he draws you closer and closer to the edge. Your moans are frantic as you practically pant against him, begging him not to stop, that you’re so close, so so close. 

With one steady thrust he snaps the last thread and you come undone around him. The feeling of you cumming around him bringing him to his limit, if he wasn’t so enraptured by you he might have been embarrassed with how quickly you’ve made him cum. His warmth fills you as you come down from your high, hazy and drooling. You smile as he presses you against him. You don’t mind staying like this, you whine when he tries to move.

“Alright, princess. I’ll stay.” He smiles, pressing a kiss to your forehead.

[thebearer]

First of all I LOVE your writing. You’re one the best writers on this app. Could you maybe write a fic about an already established relationship with carmy and the reader wakes up to carmy and the fire in his apartment pls and thank you.

P. S. I know I’m probably asking for much but I just have an entire list of fic/blurb ideas could I send you a list. its ok if you don’t

"Carmen?" Your groggy voice and muffled footsteps padded across the apartment, stumbling over a pair of chef's clogs, a pile of cookbooks.

Your nose twitched, the smell of smoke, so thick you almost thought you were dreaming. Your eyes snapped, a cold shock of realization when you saw the stove, the entire kitchen illuminated with light from the fire. Carmen standing in front of the flames, hands shaking the fiery pans with a dead stare.

"Carmen!" You shrilled, scampering over to the fire, yanking Carmen back harsher than you meant to. Carmen stuttered in movements, blinking and rubbing his eyes. "Fuck, Carm, what-" You shake your head, turning to slap on the sink, grabbing a cup and slinging water at it, the blare of the fire alarms starting.

"Shit, hold on, I-I got it." Carmen muttered, hands shaking when he moved the pans dumping them under the stream of the water, letting it sizzle with a large cloud of smoke.

You pressed yourself against the cabinet, chest heaving while you watched Carmen move the dishes furiously. You were amazed he didn't burn himself, or maybe he did, he didn't show it if he dad.

There was a stillness, a moment where you looked at Carmen and he looked back at you, wide eyed and frozen. The searing sizzle of the pans, air thick and humid with smoke and humidity, alarms blaring and making you wince at the shrill.

Neither of you said anything then, opening windows to air out the smoke, hoping to settle the fire alarms.

Carmen sat on the edge of the bed, knee bouncing and eyes still distant, still void of any light in them. "Carm," You called softly, crawling down the length of the bed towards him.

He didn't move, eyes forward, but relaxed into your touch, shoulders slumping when your hand ran over them. "Was it... Was it a nightmare?"

Carmen didn't reply. He was embarrassed, you knew that. Stressed, embarrassed, falling apart. You weren't sure how to help him, what he needed, what you should do.

So you didn't push, you didn't pry. Right now, you knew Carmen just needed to sleep, or to try to. You held him in your arms, nails raking through his curls while he laid silently beside you, hand rubbing small circles on your hip.

You waited until he fell asleep to text Sugar. Maybe she'd have better luck at getting him to go to his meetings.

[konniesreality]

hey here it is! so for context, Vanilla/Love is an experienced shifter for I think 500 years from what I remember and deity. She's got alot of posts on our community, DRA, on shifting, readings, advice, void , manifestation and void misconceptions etc...

Now, unfortunately she's no longer with us both in this reality and the community but I did get to speak to her personally before she left and her advice has helped me quite a lot so I hope these help y'all in some way

I'm always happy to send more here if y'all would like them but if not: http://aminoapps.com/p/kcxrwi

That's her account.

Thank you so much for this! I think I was in this amino but I’m not sure. Thanks so muchhh I very much appreciate it!

[vanfleeter]

Matched: Chapter 6 - The Oversight & The Future

Characters: Jake Kiszka x Thea Foster Warnings: 18+. Angst. Language. Relationship strain. Fluff. Mentions of marriage. Smut. Sex. Unprotected sex (p in v). A/N: Lock in for the whirlwind.

Month three. Exhaustion is starting to hit, the irritation and frustrations are growing. We’re nearly done with this album, just a few more songs to record and then we move onto the album art. Something we can’t all agree on.

I haven’t seen Thea in a month due to constantly being in the studio, recording, writing, doing interviews when they come up. I’ve tried to push them onto Sam or Danny so I could make more time with Thea, but they turn them down nearly every single time.

Feeling my phone vibrate in my pocket, I pull it out to see Thea calling. I can’t help but to smile at the sight of her name as I set my guitar to the side and answer her call. “Good morning,” I answered.

“Good morning,” She responds. I can hear the smile in her tone. “I woke up this morning and you were already gone..”

“I know, I’m sorry.. I totally forgot that I had this interview to do..” I lean forward on my knees and brush my hand through my hair.

“You’ve been doing them a lot lately..” She says.

“Yeah, I know..” I huff. “I guess this is what happens when you push them all on someone else for so long that now the tables have turned..”

“What time are you going to be home tonight?”

“Probably not until late, we have to finish these last few songs and Josh has been such a bitch lately.. Such a fucking perfectionist that it’s starting to annoy me..”

“Oh.. Okay.”

“I’m sorry..”

“No, don’t worry about it. But uh, since you’re not going to be back until late, then I guess I’ll just go back to my place after work. I've been kind of neglecting my plants,��� She slightly laughs.

“Oh right, okay.. But tomorrow–you and me, coffee date. I’ll pick you up.”

“Okay, then I’ll see you tomorrow,” She says before hanging up.

My brows knit together as I pull my phone away. No ‘I love you’ before she hangs up? I go to open our text thread when the door to the studio opens and Josh steps inside followed by Sam and Danny. I send her a quick ‘I love you’ text before locking my phone and putting it away.

–

It really wasn’t until late when we finally left the studio and I crashed as soon as my head hit the pillow. Though it wasn’t until the sun was blinding me that I finally woke up. My eyes bugged when I saw the time on the clock. 12:30pm. “Shit, shit, shit!” I scramble out of bed, finding that I fell asleep in my clothes from the night before. Reaching my phone, I discover that it’s nearly dead and filled with notifications. Half were from Thea wondering if I’m on my way and the other half from Josh asking me the same thing.

Dialing Thea’s number, I hold the phone between my ear and shoulder as I race to change my pants. But the call goes to her voicemail. I try again but the same thing happens.

“Thea, I’m so sorry.. I forgot to set an alarm and I overslept.. I missed our coffee date, please forgive me.. I’ll make it up to you, I swear. Come to the studio around six if you can and we’ll go to dinner, my treat. I love you.”

I hadn't heard from her all day, constantly checking my phone for a text or a missed call. Anything. But whenever I looked, my phone was void of her presence.

“Hey, don’t make any plans tonight,” Sam says as he packs up his bass. “Mom and Dad are in town, they want to meet up for dinner tonight with all of us.”

“Sam, I can’t,” I say as I pick up my guitar and put it away in its case. “I told Thea that I’d take her out to dinner tonight, I can’t bail on her. I already missed coffee this morning and I’m pretty sure she’s pissed at me.”

“How do you know she’s pissed?”

“Radio silence, Sam. She won’t even answer my calls..” I picked up my guitar case and my jacket. “Tell them sorry, but I can’t make it to dinner tonight.” Racing out of the studio, I get out to my car when my phone starts to ring in my pocket. Thea’s name flashes on the screen. Sighing in relief, I quickly answer her call. “Hey! I’m glad you called. Be ready in like ten minutes, I’m on my way to pick you up.”

“Jake..”

“I’m thinking maybe we could go for tacos.. I’ve been craving them all day and-”

“Jake.”

“Yeah?” I pause with my hand on the door handle.

“I don’t want tacos..”

“Okay, we can always get something el-”

“Today was long and exhausting and all I want to do is sleep..”

My shoulders drop and I drop my hand from the car door. “Oh.. Maybe I can come over and make you that tea-”

“Not tonight, Jake..” I hear her sigh. “I’ll call you tomorrow.”

“Oh, okay.. I’ll talk to you t–” The call ended before I finished and I dragged the phone away from my ear as the call faded from the screen. “I love you..” I mumble as I stuff my phone into my pocket.

“Coming to dinner tonight, I assume?” Sam says after he walks out of the building. “That call didn’t sound–”

“Shut up, Sam.” I say, yanking open the car door. “But fine, I’ll be at dinner tonight.”

–

Parking my car, I look over at my parents’ car in the next space over. I really didn’t want to be here, I wanted to be with Thea. I shouldn’t be feeling like this because we hardly get to see them, but at the same time, I also have been neglecting my relationship with Thea. I can admit that.

Turning the engine off, I climb out of the car and make my way into the restaurant. Almost immediately I’m pulled into a hug from my mother. “I’ve missed you!” She says as she hugs even tighter. “I want to hear all about your trip! You’ve barely sent anything home besides a few phone calls.” I promised I’d tell her about the trip, but leaving out one major detail. Dad was next to hug me and tell me how happy he is to have me back on solid ground.

For the next hour, I spent nursing a beer and pushing the food around on my plate while everyone else was chatting happily with each other. I know that Mom took notice, I’ve been feeling her eyes on me for quite some time. Her hand comes to rest gently on mine and I look up to meet her eyes.

“Is everything alright?” She asks in a quiet voice as to not grab anyone’s attention. I know lying to her won’t work, it never has, so why should I start now?

“I think we’re drifting apart, Ma,” I set my fork down. “And I know it’s my fault.”

“How so?”

“I’ve been working so much–no matter how much I try to make time, something always comes up. We were supposed to have a coffee date, but I overslept. I wanted to make it up by taking her out to dinner tonight, just her and I, but then–”

“Then we came along and ruined your plans?” I shake my head and she laughs. “I’m only joking, Jake.”

“She said she was tired, and wanted to sleep..” I tap my finger on the table. “It’s been a month, and there’s nothing I can do except to keep trying..”

“It won’t be like this for long,” She says as she grabs my hand again. “At least until the album is finished.”

“Yeah.. But then comes more interviews and press.” I lean back in the chair. “She’s not happy, and I can’t blame her.”

“Don’t you have time before the tour starts?”

“A few weeks.”

“Take her out on the boat for a few days,” Mom says. “I’m sure she’d love it.”

“You think so?”

Mom smiles. “You both need some time away–together. Balance is important and I know you’re trying.” She pats my hand and smiles before going back to speak with Dad.

–

On my way home from dinner, I decided to make a stop at Thea’s apartment. I knock on her door and wait to hear her footsteps on the hardwood floor as she comes to the door. But none came, so I knocked again. Still no answer. She must be asleep then. I start to walk away, to go back down to the car, when the door opens followed by her voice.

“Jake?” I turn back to find her in her pajamas, rubbing her eyes as she yawns. “What are you doing here?”

“I, uh, I wanted to come see you. I know you wanted to sleep but..”

“No, no, it’s okay..” She waves me in and closes the door behind me. “I want to apologize for blowing you off..”

I shake my head and pull her in close to kiss the top of her forehead. “I can’t be mad at you,” I say when I pull away. “I just thought, because we haven’t seen much of each other, we could have gone out or something.. Plus I felt guilty for missing our coffee date.”

“Don’t worry about that,” She walks over to the kitchen and grabs a brown paper bag. “I assumed you had overslept after working so late, which you confirmed in your voicemail.” She hands me the bag and leans against the counter. “So I picked up a muffin for you.”

“Thea, you didn’t have to..” Now I feel even worse. I close the bag and cross over the floor to press my lips to hers. “I’ve been so flaky with you and you still, for some reason, give all this love. I don’t deserve it after all that’s been going on.”

She smiles and pulls me back in for a kiss. “It’ll all be worth it though,” She says. “Not much longer.” Her arms wrap around my neck and she kisses me again, this time deepening it.

“Please tell me you’re mad, so I can feel guilty.”

Thea smiles and kisses me again. “I’ll be honest, I am just a little bit.”

“You and me, we are taking a trip once this album is done,” I wrap my arms around her and pull her close. “We have a break for a few weeks in between the album’s release and the start of the tour. I only have to do a few interviews that will be pre recorded and released sporadically over time, but we are taking a trip.”

“On the boat?”

I smile and nod my head. “I’m finding a way to have it brought to the coast. We’re going to go sailing for a couple weeks, wherever the wind takes us.”

“You sound like a chick flick.” She laughs.

I can’t help but to roll my eyes. Sometimes I have a way with words, though they do tend to make me sound like an eighteenth century writer. I think I sound romantic, but others find me weird. To each their own, I guess.

That night I made love to her. In the month we’ve barely seen each other, we could both feel the need drawing us to each other. A primal need, one we’ve been craving. And as much as I wanted to turn her around and bend her over the kitchen counter right in that moment and just fuck her, my heart was demanding for this to be taken slow.

After all, it had been a month. One slow and agonizing month.

After we had managed to strip each other naked, between all of the kissing and fondling, I scooped her in my arms and carried her down the hall to her bedroom and laid her on the bed. I knew that she knew that I could hardly contain myself as she pulled me on top of her.

Crawling over top of her, I lay in between her legs and line myself up with her entrance. Slowly I push myself into her, her whimpering moans filling my ears. Oh how I’ve missed hearing that. I take it slow, thrusting into her, making this last for as long as I can.

I know these remaining few months are going to be difficult, and I won’t see her as much. But I know after it’s all said and done, we will travel. I’ve wanted to take her out on the boat, sail the open seas with her, and show her the world as I’ve seen it.

I feel her clench around my cock, signaling that she’s close. Feeling myself nearing my own, I thrust deeper into her, placing hungry kisses to the side of her neck.

We soon reach our end and I fall on top of her, breathing heavily. “I love you,” I whisper as I kiss her chest. “I hope you know that.”

“Of course I do,” She drags her fingers through my hair. “I love you too.”

Removing myself, I slide onto the bed beside her and she lays against my chest. “This album,” I begin to speak, resting my arm behind my head. “Might be the last one, for a while.”

She lifts her head, resting her chin in hand across my chest. “You’re really going to go through with it? Is that what you want?”

“No,” He says. “But it’s what has to be done. The band already took a break once before and it was beneficial for all of us. As much as I know that Sam and Danny are eager to get back into the stride of things, and as much as I thoroughly enjoy making music and touring and living out my dream.. I know that deep down, and I know he’ll deny it, Josh wants to pursue film. He dipped his toe back into it while I was away and he’s so passionate about it.. I think it’s time to change places–at least for a little while.”

“You’d be okay giving up the band to help him with his film?”

I nod my head. “Of course. He’s given half his life to this band, to my dream. So once we finish this album, and the tour–we’re gonna stop for a while.”

“How long?” She asks.

I rest my hand on her back, drawing soft circles on her skin. “Until he is content,” I say. “And long enough so that you and I can start a life together, if you want that too.”

She smiles and moves closer to kiss me. “Of course I do. I want it all with you. Tell me about it.”

“About this life.” She moves to sit up, and brushes her hair behind her ear. “I’ve seen the smile on your face as you dream. So.. Tell me about it.”

A smile spreads across my face and I push myself up into a sitting position. I reach my hand forward and brush my hand across her face. “They have your eyes. All three of them.”

Her head cocks to the side as her lips curl into a smile and her eyebrows rise. “Three?”

I smile and nod my head. “Two boys, and a girl. Michael and Henry.”

“The girl doesn’t have a name?”

“I never knew her name, but she was definitely your mini-me.”

“What else was in this dream of yours?”

I cleared my throat and shifted my place on the bed and I continued on about my dream,

“We have a home, with a lot of land. There’s a creek nearby that the children love to play in apparently. With the house there is a porch, where we can sit and enjoy the sunsets in the evenings and watch our children run around and have fun. I know for a fact that it will be a home for us to grow old in too.”

She gently brings her hand to my face and caresses my cheek, her thumb softly rubbing over my skin. “That sounds beautiful. And it was all with me?”

I nod my head. She smiles and brings her face closer to kiss me. Not a hungry kiss but a passionate one. When she pulls away she grabs my right hand and pulls it to her lips. “This might sound a little crazy and it’s so spontaneous, but.. What if we didn’t wait?”

“What do you mean?” I ask, placing my other hand over hers.

She smiles, laughing softly, as she places her other hand on top of mine. “What if we elope?”

Elope?

“I-I know it’s soon and we haven’t been together for long but I love you and I want everything with you. I want that dream that you had, I want all the children with you, I want to grow old with you. Every trial and tribulation laid out before us, I want to go through them with you.” She holds my hands a little tighter. “I loved Sam, but I didn’t see a future with him. I waited for you to come back because I knew that you and I were meant to be together.”

“Is this your way of proposing?” I tease.

She smacks her lips and I chuckle. “So what if it is?”

I smile and untangle our hands before sliding out of the bed and going over to my dresser where I had my small jewelry box sitting up on top. Lifting the lid, I search for the right ring before going back over to her.

“It might be a little big for your tiny fingers but…” I pick up her left hand and slide the silver band onto her ring finger. “I’ll buy you an actual one later,” She smiles and I bring her hand to my lips to kiss it. “Dorothea Foster, I have pined after you for years, hoping one day I’d finally get the chance to love you. And I finally got that chance and now I don’t want to let you go. Will you do the honor of marrying me?” I saw a tear slide down her cheek, and I reached up to wipe it away. She nods her head and I pull her in for a kiss.

Climbing over my lap and straddling my waist, she draws me in deeper. I slide my hands down her back and grip her ass in my hands. She giggles against my lips and I smile. Reaching her hand down between us, she grips my length in her hand and gives it a few pumps before she’s inserting it inside of herself.

“Oh fuck,” I groan as she sinks down around me. Keeping one arm wrapped around her, I use my other to lean on as I thrust my hips upward. We start to move together, kissing each other.

Turning us over, I lay her on her back and continue pumping myself inside of her. My name falls from her lips repeatedly, begging me to keep going. I could feel the lust ravaging through my veins, overpowering everything. Her hands dig into my back, clawing at my skin, no doubt leaving marks on my skin.

But just like our first time together, she holds tightly to my body with her legs before flipping us over. She rides me relentlessly, chasing her own high as she brings me to mine.

Climbing off of me, she lays down on the bed before moving over to cuddle into the side of my body. I didn't know how much I had needed her until I felt her release coating me. I held her tightly, unsure of when I’d see her again before our boat trip.

I can’t wait for that trip. Just her and I alone with nothing but the open seas and the blue skies. I’ll teach her how to sail and how to fish, we’ll sleep beneath the stars, maybe even make love every night. I just want it all with her.

And to elope, it sounds crazy, I’ll admit. Eloping was never a thought but it is now. We don’t need a big wedding and a lot of witnesses. It can just be the two of us, getting married somewhere beautiful. In a matter of months it will be happening.

I feel her poke my cheek, pulling my attention away from my thoughts. “What are you thinking about?”

“Us eloping..”

“Do you not want to go through with it?”

“No, of course I do.. I’m just thinking about how to do it.”

Thea props herself up on her elbow beside me, flipping her hair over her shoulder. “And how do you want to do it?”

“I think we should do it while we’re away on the trip, go someplace that we both love, and just do it there.” I lay my arm behind my head and look at the ceiling. “Maybe I’ll even ask Josh to officiate it. He can be ordained to do so online and he’d be the only one who knows–at least for now.”

“I think he’d absolutely love to do it.”

“And possibly when the tour is over, we can have a party with our family and close friends to celebrate.”

Thea smiles and leans down to kiss me. “That sounds like the perfect plan.. But just one minor problem.”

I pull my eyebrows together in confusion as I look at her. “And what would that be?”

“Do you trust that Josh will keep his mouth shut for the time being?”

“Worth the risk.” I wink at her and pull her in for a kiss.

general tag list:

@watchingover-hypegirl @losfacedevil @ignite-my-fire @ohgodthefeeling-gvf @writingcold @jaketlove @mackalah @lexii-nv-c @em-gvf01 @katiegvf @joshkiszkaenthusiast @takenbythemadness @jakekiszkasmommy @objectsinspvce @gvfmarge @heckingfrick @bluemeadows77 @laneygvf @sacredmachine @gvfpal @killerqueengvf @jaketlover @jordinlkiszka @alwaysonthemend @hellowgoodbye @anythingforjtk @hi-hi-hello11 @anthemofgvf @gretasfallingsky @songbirds-sweet @wildbluesorbit @klarxtr @stardustsecret @sunandthemoontwinflames @everyglowinthetwilightknows @sinsofstardust @sparrowofthedawnsworld @josh-iamyour-mama @dannys-dream @peaceloveunitygvf @dayumclarizzel @thetroublegetssoloud71 @jakebrainrot @gretavanfleetmichelle

Want to be added to my general tag list? Please reach out and I'll be happy to add you! ♡

If you are missing from the list, I do apologize--I may have missed you or tumblr won't let me tag you! But please reach out and let me know if you do not see yourself and I will work on getting that fixed!

[ask-katima]

Welcome to the Master Post of Katima’s Ask Blog!

Warning….. it’s long-/SRS

Projects: Small Companion (on going), Katima comic (Discontinued)

Lucas/Owner: Example of text.

Hello! I am the mod of this ask blog and my oc, Katima! I’ll be mostly talking in the updates, but you might find Katima talking here too, take her words with a bit of salt, but she is like the owner of this blog, since asks are for her!

If you’d like to ask ME something, please make sure to make it clear in your ask, since I’m not a mind reader. I’m also autistic and have ADHD so I might not catch simple clues, you have to write it in bold red letters for me ;p/silly.

Please use He/It/Void pronouns on me! Any other pronouns aren’t really welcomed… so if you use they, I won’t really like it.

I’m comfortable with mostly any topics! However the NSFW or very graphic violence isn’t for me.. I’d rather not see that AT ALL! Sure, I enjoy some romance and a bit of angst, but I’m not that over the top.

Also I’m a silly guy who can’t tell tones, so please use tone tags with me, I’m really timid if I take your comment/words as pretty mad/degrading… so please make it clear to me that you aren’t..

Katima: example of text

(Huge document on her alone)

(Huge document on the whole AU where she comes from.)

(I also use the indented feature for her.)

Heyo! I’m the creation of Lucases wiiiide imagination… yeah I’m self aware…. To the point you’d be probably thinking I’m another human using the internet from your “earth” or something…. But in reality, I just know too much, research and am self reserved about stuff.

My creator just decided that, “Fuck it! If Ink can speak/hear the creators then Katima can hear/speak to me!” Soo, grumble to him bout that I guess, hah.. makes sure to insult him when you do so…./hj.

All asks are assigned to me automatically, if you’d like to ask Lucas make it clear, like he said on the top.

You can use any pronouns on me except “it”… I know I’m just an oc or whatever…. But I still have feelings and I hate being treated as an object/referred to one.

I have the same preference as Lucas.

Please use tone tags with me too, since I’m being puppeteered by Lucas it means that I, too am unable to read tone… but I am able to… if Lucas could-

Rules of the blog, asks and stuff.

1. No NSFW, at all! It can be romantic but… keep it classy and up to code.

1.b No heavy gore!! It can have some injuries nd mention of violence, but keep it to a minimum…

2. Since rule 1 is for roleplaying purposes, asks can have roleplaying text! If you’d like to continue the roleplay beyond the ask, please tell me via a comment or a private message on Tumblr. I’d appreciate that!

3. No slurs. That’s it. Nothing more to say, as soon as you write it and post that, I’m blocking you. And there will be no way out.

4. Fanart is always welcome! I’m not one to say no to some creativity! With that aid, any creative project present with any of my characters I’ll say yes to. You don’t even have to ask. As far as roleplaying goes… make sure you red EVERYTHING I have on Katima, and please make sure not to stray away too far from how she’s represented. Otherwise you’re free to roleplay as her to your hearts content! (And if they ask you who the creator is, make sure to link this blog/post.)

5. Please use common sense and proper grammar. I know it can be hard wording sometimes, you don’t have to send your ask RIGHT AWAY! As if in a race, you can take your sweet ol’ time writing it to perfection! Or even better, you don’t have to send it today! It can be tomorrow when you’re feeling better or something.

6. Be respectful of my time and availability. I won’t respond right away sometimes, either I’m too tired and aware of how bad I would fumble, drawing, roleplaying or sleeping. Please be respectful of this. (I am available from 9 am to 3 am mostly, yes, it’s the whole day. However I live in Europe Slovakia so we have to count on that. GMT + 2.)

7. I’m not a master in anything I’m doing 😅, so if there are any mistakes anywhere or imperfections, please either tell me, give some tips or ignore it. Thank you!

8. Please don’t ask me questions that are too personal/something private. Those asks will go unanswered.

9. This isn’t a rule, mostly a notice. If I’m not feeling up to it, I’ll recycle old drawings for asks. Please don’t be offended or sad, the reason behind that will be: No ideas what to draw, not enough motivation or I simply don’t have time for it currently.

Sites & socials you can find me on:

Discord: lucasisverycool01 •server•

Instagram

Artfight

Tik Tok

YouTube

Devianart

Reddit

Roblox: Sikowow_2 (nickname is Lucas)

Cookie Run Kingdom: Memekingdom001 (Hollyberry server)

Vr Chat: LucasIsVeryCool

Notion

Lucas’s Tumblr (separate content)

Fair warning that I’m not the most acrive on most sites except for here, discord and vr chat… sooo please don’t be mad I don’t recognize you commented something on one of my socials ASAP! Also my Devianart account is mostly there so I know what the artists there are up to and stuffs!

That would be it, have fun asking and observing folks!

[crissiebaby]

Stepmother Knows Best, Pt. 3

DISCLAIMER: This story contains diaper usage, humiliation, domination, crossdressing, masturbation/diaper sex, and other ABDL themes. I hope you enjoy!

Commissioned By: Anon

-------------------------------------------------------------

“Oh, he is just going to look so precious in these!”

“Please tell me you got the biggest you could find!”

As Rachel and Deloris fawned over the contents of the bags that Sara had ferried into the walk-in closet, Ryan’s dreadful anticipation only grew. At first, his concern had remained mild, assuming whatever Sara had brought over must’ve been an extra girly outfit or something. However, as time stretched and the girls kept digging and digging, his concern began to rise slowly and steadily until it was so intense that he could barely stand still.

“I’m almost kinda nervous. I’ve never done something like this, “said Rachel, fanning her flushed face as all the excitement had sent a wealth of blood to her cheeks.

Rubbing her hands together, Deloris did not share Rachel’s anxiety in the slightest, “Relax, I’ll take care of…that part. It’s been a few years and he’s a bit bigger than I’m used to but I’m sure I can still manage.” She turned her head back to look at Ryan, making sure her words were deliberately vague enough for him not to understand.

Perhaps the anticipation that Deloris was setting up for Ryan was a tad too much, though, as a very frustrated Ryan finally got fed up with waiting for the big reveal. Stomping across the closet with his green velvet dress only half on, he shoved an unprepared Rachel out of the way before tearing the bags open. “Will you quit it with the theatrics?! Let’s just get this over…with…” said Ryan, his words petering off as he stared into the void of the bag, terrified of what was staring back at him.

Without hesitation, Ryan made a break for the closet door. It didn’t matter how he was dressed or what his dad saw anymore. It would be a cold day in hell before he’d willingly let the girls put him in something so fundamentally psychotic. Where did Sara even find that stuff?! Grabbing onto the door handle, he was instantly accosted by all three women, who gleefully dug their claws into his body with every intent of restraining him for what was to come. In spite of Ryan’s best efforts, three against one was not a fair fight. His fingers held onto the little, golden knob for as long as he could but eventually, his digits gave out and he was forced to the ground on his back. “N-NO! I-I did everything you wanted me to! You can’t do this to me!!!” he screamed, writhing around on the carpet as the girls did their best to pin him down.

“Deloris, go get the package! We’ll keep him down,” said Sara, placing a knee on Ryan’s chest as she used her entire body weight to keep his arms at his sides.

Simultaneously, Rachel was being thrown around by Ryan’s legs as she rested her body on top of them with her arms hugging his lower appendages to her chest. In a way, it was a lot like riding a mechanical bull, only much bonier. “P-Please hurry! He’s killing my boobs!” she groaned Rachel as Ryan slammed his feet against the floor, sending shockwaves up through Rachel’s poor, defenseless mammaries. 

Rachel’s words only encouraged Ryan to thrash harder. He didn’t like the idea of hurting a woman physically in any way but since he was essentially a hostage, desperate times called for desperate measures. Sadly, thanks to being kept in Rachel’s closet all afternoon, the last meal Ryan had eaten was breakfast, which at his point was nearly seven hours prior. Additionally, he’d also been made to cum multiple times today, weakening his body tremendously. Because of this, it only took about 45 seconds of jerking his body around for the exhaustion to kick in. With no more gas left in the tank, his body went limp all at once as his breathing became haggard and weary.

“So much for all that big man strength,” said Sara, giggling at her own poor impression of Randy Savage. Having taken care of Ryan, she turned her attention to Deloris, sinking her teeth into her bottom lip as her grand revenge scheme began to unfold. Since there was nothing he could do now, she leaned in close to his ear, wanting to make sure he understood precisely why this was happening, “Looks like Soggy Sara is the one who gets the last laugh.”

While Sara may have been on cloud 9 after revealing why she’d been harboring vengeful feelings for so long, Ryan’s confusion only grew as he had zero memory of the birthday party incident that had plagued Sara’s soul for so long. Tragically, it mattered little what he did and didn’t remember because he was going to pay the price for his past self’s actions whether he wanted to or not. 

“Alright! Time to say goodbye to those big girl panties you love so much,” said Deloris, snickering as she sat down on Ryan’s thighs, taking the pressure off of Rachel a little. She wrapped her fingers around the waistband of the lacy, vibrating panties and pulled them down, maneuvering them through her legs before passing them off to Rachel to do the same.

Then came the moment that made Ryan’s heart stop as Deloris raised an unfolded adult diaper for Ryan to see. “At least we won’t have to worry about you making sticky accidents in Mommy’s dwesses anymore,” she said, cooing at Ryan with a babyish affect like any good mother would. 

After a bit of finagling, Deloris managed to slide the soft padding under Ryan’s rump. This triggered him to begin wagging his hips around in a last-ditch attempt to make this as hard for the girls as possible. Unfortunately, Deloris had seen this coming and had already thought up a perfect solution. As his hips were moving around, she reached down and clutched his dick and balls tightly, forcing the emasculated Ryan to let out a sharp yelp as his body went stiff and rigid. “That’s enough of that. There’ll be no more fussing about until Auntie Deloris gets you changed. Is that clear?” she said, giving his boys a test squeeze to show Ryan she meant business.

Wincing in pain, Ryan once again went limp under Deloris’s very serious threat. He felt his pride shatter to pieces as he willingly let his butt rest atop the fluffy diaper. “Th-This is the last one, right?” he asked, praying that this would all be over soon.

“Of course,” said Deloris, her condescending smile filling Ryan with little hope that she was being true to her word. Sadly, as much as he didn’t believe her, it was the only form of hope he could cling to at this point. 

Squirting several long streaks of baby lotion into her hand, Deloris pressed the gooey substance against Ryan’s cock, smothering his sore penis in creamy goodness. Her fingers ran down the length of his shaft and balls, ensuring a thick, even coating. She then added more lotion to her hand before applying coverage to the rest of his front diaper area, running her hand between his upper thighs and across his budding pubic hairs. “I’m almost kind of shocked his bikini area is so well groomed. I half-expected to find a forest,” she said, lightly pinching at his curly hairs with her fingertips.

“I can answer that one,” said Sara, her chipper voice striking fear into Ryan’s soul over what she might say next, “I think I mentioned to Ryan like a year ago maybe that only virgins don’t keep their pubes trimmed. Guess he took that to heart.” The three women all cackled at Ryan’s attempt to appear experienced, further fueling the blush in his cheeks. 

“Well, I certainly appreciate you making this easy for me, Baby Ryan,” said Deloris, giving his actively swelling shaft a final once over before turning to Rachel, “Alright, we’ll need to lift his legs to cover the booty. One, two, threeeee-Ugh!” With a soft grunt, Deloris and Rachel pushed Ryan’s legs into the air to expose his smooth buttocks. Knowing they couldn’t keep him held in this position for long, she pushed the bottle of lotion close to his butt and began slamming down on the pump, exploding a plethora of lotion onto Ryan’s ass. She then used her free hand to rub it into his skin, spending an extra amount of time running her open palm through his butt crack.

As a parting gift, as Deloris finished getting him all lotioned up, she let her middle finger slip inside Ryan’s puckered anus. The reaction was instantaneous with his body convulsing wildly from the rear intrusion. His body may have been weakened but having his back door played with was enough to wake his muscles up momentarily. He twisted his legs free from Rachel and Deloris's grasp as he crashed back down on top of the open diaper, panting heavily.

“Well, at least that part’s over,” said Rachel, chuckling as she wiped the moisture from her forehead, “So what’s next?” Looking around the nearby area, Deloris let out an annoyed sigh. “Shoot, I must’ve left the baby powder in the bag. Keep him held while I go grab the bottle,” she said, helping Rachel shift so that she was sitting atop his legs again facing his feet with her hands clutching his ankles tightly.

Left alone with Ryan’s upper half, Sara ran her fingers along his chin as she whispered, “See? This isn’t so bad, is it? I’ll bet all that lotion feels extra soothing.” She reached across his body and brushed her hand against Ryan’s lubricated cock, enjoying the way his body quivered from her touch.

Lightbulb!

Looking back and forth between Rachel and Deloris, Sara realized that this was the perfect opportunity to kick Ryan’s humiliation up to the next level. Tucked away in her pocket was a special tool that she had picked up from the CrissBaby store along with the diapers. She pulled a small vial out and held it up to her eyes. Its label read, “CrissBaby Diaper Aphrodisiac - Rose Scented.” Just a couple drops of this would keep him as hard as a rock for hours. Unscrewing the cap, she set the dropper aside, opting to pour the entire bottle onto his slightly stiff member instead. She quickly spread the liquid all over his naughty bits, rubbing it into his skin so that Rachel and Deloris would be none the wiser.

Ryan, meanwhile, had no clue what Sara was up to. From his perspective, she had randomly decided to start playing with his penis. Over the course of five seconds, his mind ran the gamut between having his wildest fantasies realized with Sara and the fact that he was still wrapped up in a green velvet dress with a fresh diaper under his ass. Unsurprisingly, his dick was nowhere as conflicted as his brain was as it expanded to a full erection in no time. His moment with Sara didn’t last long, though, as she quickly pulled her hand away before Deloris could return with the lotion.

“Oh my! Someone seems to be having more fun than they’d like to admit” said Deloris, her eyes falling on Ryan’s pulsing hard-on. Her words prompted Rachel to look behind her before flopping to the floor in hysterics.

Knowing his arousal was all Sara’s doing, Ryan wanted to argue that he wasn’t enjoying a second of this. However, after the number of times he’d been made to climax from the vibrating panties, it wasn’t likely his words would hold any water anyway. Instead, he furrowed his brow and looked away from the three giggling girls. “J-Just do it already,” he said, unaware of how much his anger looked like bratty pouting.

“Worry not! One last step and we’ll get your lil’ buddy swaddled up in something nice and cozy,” said Deloris as she got to work sprinkling powder all over Ryan’s crotch. Thankfully for Ryan, the powdering process was much more expedient than the lotioning had been. The girls pushed his legs up again and scattered the linen-scented substance across his bottom before pouring some directly onto the diaper. Laughter was once again jump-started as she lowered his butt back onto the diaper, causing a poof of white powder to waft into the air. It was all over from there, as she unceremoniously lifted the diaper up between his legs and taped it down tight over Ryan’s stiffy. 

With his diaper now secured, Ryan went numb, unable and unwilling to accept the crinkly plastic that his hips were wrapped up in as reality. Unfortunately, the numbness was soon replaced by an odd tingling sensation that began to emit from his privates. It wasn’t unpleasant but it was unnaturally hot. He began repeating the word, “No,” over and over again in his head as the pleasurable warmth induced his inflating cock to strain against the fluffy confines of his diaper, something that did not go unnoticed.

“Well, would you look at that,” said Rachel, finally lifting herself off of Ryan’s legs as she honed in on his tented padding. She gave the tip a tiny poke, amazed as just the slightest touch nearly sent him over the edge, “I don’t believe it but I think he’s even more turned on by this than the vibrating panties! Did we accidentally stumble across your secret fetish?”

Hell was starting to look like an all-expense paid vacation compared to the unreal humiliation that was being inflicted on Ryan. What was happening to him? He stabbed his teeth into his tongue and scrapped his fingernails against the flesh of his hands, doing anything he could to lessen the euphoric tingles that were enrapturing his dick.

While Ryan was fighting a war of attrition against his own arousal, the girls moved in with the final piece of Ryan’s sissy baby wardrobe. “Since you couldn’t get enough of all those fuzzy, girly feelings, I figured this would be right up your alley,” said Sara, holding up a powder blue, taffeta party dress with poofy sleeves, an extremely short skirt, and a built-in petticoat. Unlike the other outfit that Ryan had been coerced into wearing, this one was by far the shortest, looking more as though it had been made for a ten-year-old, “Of all the outrageously girly things my mother made me wear as a kid, this was the one dress that even she couldn’t force me into! So don’t worry about returning it! It’s all yours, Baby Ryan!”

“Wow, thanks,” said Ryan with a heavy dose of sarcasm. Feeling utterly defeated at this point, he allowed Rachel to lift his arms up so that Sara could slide the dress onto him. It was by far the softest and smoothest thing he had worn so far. The buttery fabric hugged his torso from every angle, pinching his waist a bit due to the fact that the dress barely fit past his fairly broad chest. As the dress’s delicate petticoats brushed against his sensitive thighs, he could swear he felt his penis growing even harder inside his diaper. What was happening to him?! He didn’t enjoy this…right?!

Elated by the conflicting emotions that Ryan’s face was zooming through, Deloris stepped in behind him and took hold of his extended hair. “It’s okay if you’re starting to enjoy this, ya know? You’re one of the girls now, Riley” she said, gifting him a feminized version of his name to match his appearance. She suppressed her giggles at Ryan’s expense as she began shaping his hair into a pair of adorable pigtails.

“You sure about Riley?” asked Rachel, pondering over if Deloris’s new name for Ryan was precious enough, “What about Raelynn?! Then we can call him Lynn for short!”

Placing her thumb and forefinger on her chin, Sara chimed in, “I’m more partial to Rain if we’re being honest. It sounds like something a trendy girl would pick out for herself.

As the ladies argued over what Ryan’s new girl name should be, Ryan could only stand in place and gawk at his own reflection. Gone was his father’s wealthy slob of a son, replaced by a little diaper girl who didn’t even look old enough to drive, let alone take over his father’s company someday. Speaking of his father, he knew based on the way the sun was hitting the master bedroom window adjacent to the closet that it was pretty late in the afternoon. “H-Hey, c-can we please be done now,” he said, cutting off the girls in the midst of his renaming summit. He choked back tears as he pleaded for mercy, “My d-dad’s gotta be getting home soon.”

Looking back and forth between Sara and Deloris, Rachel spoke up. “Oh yes, I’d say we’re done. This’ll be perfect. Thank you for being so patient with us today while we figured out your new wardrobe,” she said, stepping toward Ryan slowly like a predator stalking its prey.

“That’s right! It took a bit of trial and error but I’m with Rachel. This is the perfect basis for your new look! Now we can pick you out a bunch of new clothes and accessories!” said Deloris, positioning herself so that she was in the way of Ryan’s most direct escape route.

Circling around to Ryan’s side, Sara pressed her fingers together, unaware of how much her posture was akin to a cartoon villain. “I have plenty of old dresses just like this one that you’re free to wear whenever! And don’t worry if Daddy cuts you off! You can always come stay with me and be my 24/7 dress-up dolly,” she said, closing in on Ryan and placing an arm around his shoulder, “Doesn’t that sound sooooo fun?!”

Shaking his head, Ryan reacted much like any cornered animal would. He broke from Sara’s casual hold on him, making a mad dash for the door. To his surprise, the ladies allowed him to break through the closet door. He sprinted around the bed as fast as his diapered legs could waddle. If he could just make it back to his room then this whole nightmare would be over. Racing down the hallway, he approached his bedroom door at the far end. “Hahaha! Go fuck yourself, Rachel!” he screamed at the top of his lungs as he grabbed the handle to his bedroom door victoriously.

*Rattle!*

In an instant, the cheerful and relieved expression on his face disintegrated as he jiggled the doorknob, only to find that the girls had locked it from the inside. “N-No! Nonononono!” he shouted as he desperately rammed his shoulder into the door multiple times.

“Oh, Raelynn!” said Rachel in a sing-songy as she and her two cohorts stepped out into the hallway, cornering Ryan in an even tighter space, “Did I hear you say a potty word about Mommy? That’s a big no-no.”

Folding her arms with a satisfied smirk, Deloris was more than happy to respond in Ryan’s place, “Sounds like someone earned herself a big punishment! And we were just about to get you changed too.” Both she and Ryan knew she was lying but teasing Ryan with his failed escape attempt was too delicious to pass up on.

Turning around slowly as if he was a final girl in a horror movie, Ryan’s heart filled with dread as he saw the three women slinking toward him side by side, ensuring that the entire hallway was blocked by their bodies. “Y-You three are fucking insane-HEY!” he yelled as the girls easily wrestled him to the ground before lifting him in the air, “Put me down! W-Where are you taking me?!” His fingers scraped against the pure white balusters, hoping to grab hold of anything to halt the girls’ campaign, even if only for a brief moment. Sadly, his arms were too constrained to do any real damage to their plans, allowing them to carry his body downstairs to the living room without much of a fight.

“Let’s get him tied down right here,” said Rachel as she and the others sat Ryan down in front of the tea table. The girls then proceeded to use a set of Rachel’s silk scarves to bind his ankles and waist to his seat.

Meanwhile, Sara and Deloris got to work subduing Ryan’s arms. “Keep a hold of him for a sec, Deloris! I’ve got the perfect way to keep him pinned,” said Sara, making sure Deloris had a good hold on Ryan before racing back up to the walk-in closet, only to return in a matter of seconds with a fluffy, pink teddy bear in her arms. “Remember, Mr. Fluffles? You made fun of me for having him in my bed the one and only time I let you into my room. What was that you said? Only toddlers sleep with stuffed animals? Guess he’s perfect for you now.”

Nestling the plush bear into Ryan’s lap, Delrois and Sara forced Ryan to wrap his arms around the stuffy before tying them into place, binding him in much the way a straight jacket would. With his arms, legs, and waist fully bound to the seat, the most he could do was wiggle in place, unable to shift his body more than a handful of inches in any direction. “What?! Are you bitches gonna make me have a stupid tea party with you now?!” he said, his mouth existing as his only source of defiance.

“Such rude language for such a proper lady,” said Deloris, who by this point was done with Ryan’s foul words. Thankfully, she’d done some digging through Sara’s goodie bags and found the perfect solution to this problem. Pulling out a pink pacifier with a massive ball in place of a mouthguard and four laces attached to it, she stormed up to Ryan and plopped it into his mouth before tying the laces around his head to keep it secure.

For Ryan’s effort, he attempted to spit out the pacifier or at least dislodge it in some way but without his hands, there really wasn’t much he could do. “D-Dish ish shtoopid!” he screamed, muffled by the wide bulb of his shiny, new binky.

“That’s enough out of you,” said Deloris, grabbing the pink orb that was attached to Ryan’s paci and giving it a hardy squeeze. This caused a rush of liquid to push out of the bulb in Ryan’s mouth, coating his mouth in a thick, berry-flavored syrup. With nowhere for the liquid to go, he was forced to swallow it, much to Deloris’s delight, “CrissBaby makes so many fascinating things. Who would’ve ever thought to make a pacifier with a dispenser attached to it?” Nodding in agreement, Sara was feeling quite proud of the purchases she had made. “I know right?! You filled the bulb with that oral numbing agent I bought, yeah?” she asked excitedly.

“Of course! That should keep our little girl sounding sweet for the foreseeable future,” said Deloris, relishing in Ryan’s agony, “The bottle says not to leave it on too long unless you really, really want it to be permanent. Funny how they worded it that way. It’s almost like they know it will be used to turn sissies like you into lispy, little pwinceshesh! Hehehe!”

Sure enough, it was only a matter of seconds before Ryan could feel the light prickles of numbness invading his mouth and tongue. “D-Dish shtuff betta wash off!” he said, uncertain if it was the pacifier or the numbing agent causing his lisp at this point.

“Oh, hush. Your mouth may say one thing but your body is saying something completely different,” said Rachel, who had finished with Ryan’s ankle restraints just in time to grope his diaper-encased hard-on for dramatic effect, having no idea that his unending erection was the direct result of Sara’s sabotage.

Whimpering as he wiggled his hands and feet fruitlessly, Ryan was utilizing every ounce of resistance left in him to keep from enjoying his stepmother’s loving touch. Why did diapers have to feel so good on his cock?! “D-Dat doesn change…nuffin! I neva wan-ned any of dish!” he shrieked, his voice cracking under the pressure of perverse pleasure.

“Sorry, sweetie but it doesn’t matter what you want anymore,” said Rachel, giving Ryan’s diaper front one last good squeeze before reaching into her pocket and pulling out his favorite lacy, vibrating panties, “This is your new life now, so get used to it.” Without warning, she pulled open the waistband of Ryan’s diaper and shoved her hand with the panties inside before carefully wrapping the silky undergarment around his stiff pecker. Standing up with a smug smirk imprinted on her face, she pointed the vibrator’s remote at him and clicked it on to full speed. She then let the remote fall from her hand to the floor before lifting her heel and crushing it, making sure the panties would stay on until the battery was drained.

Ryan’s eyes went cross as his dick was engulfed in unmitigated pleasure. Everything from the way the dress moved against his skin to the thick diaper that soaked up every ounce of seed that dribbled out of his penis was designed to ramp up his horny femininity. He bellowed out a deep moan into his pacifier as he began to mount another climax.

*RUMBLE!*

Suddenly, the sound of a garage door opening captured everyone’s attention. “He’s home! Quick, girls! To your positions!” said Deloris, circling around the table hastily and taking a seat at the tea table directly across from Ryan.

Rachel and Sara both joined her, placing themselves in the two seats neighboring Ryan’s so that all four were now taken up. “Care for some tea?” said Rachel, lifting the teapot and pouring the warm liquid into her glass before doing the same for Ryan’s teacup.

“Yes, please,” said Deloris, lifting both her teacup and saucer and holding them out for Rachel to pour into. As her cup filled with tea, she glanced over at Sara, “And Sara, you should join us for tea more often! We’d love to let you in on all of our juiciest gossip.”

Snagging a couple of cookies and setting them on her plate, Sara nodded to Deloris. “I’d love to! Besides, I’m sure I’ll already be over here a lot to babysit,” she said, turning her attention to Ryan and giving him a soft pinch on the cheek, “We’re gonna have so much fun together from now on. I’m so happy that you’ve decided to be my prissy sissy baby forever.”

Watching his adult male life slipping through his fingers like grains of sand fluttering in a warm, summer breeze, Ryan shed one final tear for his manhood, knowing his life as he’d come to know it was officially over. His wrists and ankles twisted in place as a hot load of cum was squirted into his diaper right as his dad opened the door.

“Honey, Ryan, I’m…home…”

THE END.

PART 1 PART 2

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Edited by AllySmolShork

[geodetojoy]

Doing an intro post bc I’ve wanted to for a while and I like sharing abt myself :D

Hello!! I’m Geode, and you can call me that or Lux or some other nickname lmao I really don’t mind

My pronouns are they/them and I’ve been wanting to experiment with a few neos Iike void and sage so feel free to use those too :) (I have others in my profile that I’m forgetting those are welcome as well) and I’m aroace, demiromantic, omniromantic, polyamorous and agender :D

My fandoms! (Kinda in order of fav, kinda not but the ones I think of first are at the top so do with that what you will):

Spies Are Forever

Starkid/TCB

Hermitcraft

Life Series

(Specifically Grian, Scar, Mumbo, Joel, and Etho)

Gravity Falls

Qsmp

Generation Loss

Ranboo

Slimecicle

HTTYD

TMNT (mostly Rise)

Pokémon (anything but the games, sadly I have never had access to them)

MCU (Markiplier Cinematic Universe)

FNAF

Iliad/Odyssey

EPIC the Musical

Ride the Cyclone

Welcome Home

Sonic

Sonic Real-Time Fandub

They Both Die at the End

AvA and AvM

The Owl House

DDLC

Smii7y and his gang

I write fics now!!!! My Ao3 is the same name as here, GeodeToJoy :)) (Don't expect much, I just write if I get motivation for a specific idea hehe)

I do art sometimes but I usually won’t post much; most of my posts are reblogs or interactions lmao

That being said feel free to @ me or send asks! I’m always willing to chat but am terrified to initiate conversations lmao and I love gaining new moots so if you follow I will likely follow back :DDD

I’ve also decided to make catered tags for myself :P

#geoderambles is just me yappin abt whatever is on my mind

#geodeanswers is for asks

#geodedraws is for any art I may or may not post

#geodewrites is for my fics!

#favs is for stuff i wanna save :3

#quoth the physics professor is for my collection of quotes from my physics professor bc hes. hes something thats for sure

Have a good time on tumblr and be safe!!! <3

Also DO YOUR DAILY CLICK!!!!!

[lovebvni]

Hii, can I have an intuition reading please? my question is how strong is my intuition? 😆 and how can I trust it more?

she/her, A. I'm a night owl and I trust into subliminal videos aff and I love the occult. Thank you 💕💕

HII A!!! i hope ur doing well :p i’m also a night owl!! always have been since i was a baby! i’m pretty sure i was born at like 2/3 am so!!! i stay up late drawing and dabbling in the occult too!!

i personally haven’t used subs much for physical appearance or anything bc how how strong my affirmations r!!! literally manifested my nose changes shapes and it did!!

anyways, on with your reading!

your intuition is pretty strong! i see you’re in time and in touch with it. you maybe be getting weird feelings in your chest or even headaches if you’re doing something that’s going against this feeling.

you can tune in more by simply meditating and listening to yourself. say “what can i do to better myself? connect to my spiritual body and mind more?”

i’m seriously getting a deep sense of deep meditation. perhaps even the void state or some sort of astral projection? i’m sorry i don’t know the correct terminology, but something where you can be out of your body and just with your soul.

purple is very prevalent here.

I LOVE OLD BARBIE SONGS HELPP!!

it’s about finding who you are when you finally get at peace with yourself. you have to accept you have flaws but you can still do everything and more!

listen to this song bc it slays and i love it xx

anyways, a, i hope this applies to you and helps you !!

sending love and joy!! <3

[shig-a-shig-ah]

LMAOOOO U ARE NOT ANCIENT!!! but yeah im p sure he was 20 when it started but i could always pretend he was 22 in the current manga 😔 anyway methinks im too late for the raffle but imma send some monies for ur kitties 🥺

-void anon <3

The universe might be conspiring in your favor lol cuz if you do it before I’m out of this meeting you’ll be in time. So you got like 35 minutes lmao.

[chocolatestrawberriesandcream]

hello everyone! not that i anticipate anybody finding this blog since it’s essentially a public diary as i probably won’t be reblogging anything on here. i mainly just want to vent into the void.

this blog is for no one but myself, however, if someone happens upon it and finds a sense of “i’m not alone in this!” then that’s fantastic, feel free to send me an ask at anytime for any reason (just don’t be gross)

this blog will contain nsfw topics, i know it’s controversial on tumblr to have a sexual side to regression at all, and while i won’t be posting straight up p*rn or smut or anything, i might mention it from time to time. (for clarification though, to me littlespace and subspace are entirely different, though similar, but for sure can have some crossover or confusion due to my trauma with a past cg/boyfriend which i will not disclose) so if nsfw topics like that aren’t something you want to see, that is completely fine, feel free to block me (i will also do my best to tag those posts as such with nsfw tag, so just block that tag if it’s not something you’re interested in)

hope you have a good day <3

[lesbianneopolitan]

I know I’ve talked about this with friends before, or inside my head, but I’m p sure I didn’t write anything down- aside of seeing other people pointing it out as well, but because I agree with all of this, I didn’t see the reason to write about it again xD

A few of the points here were things I tackled in my big reasoning behind Spicecream, but that aside, I think about this like a lot even now lol

I still stand with the point that Neo’s main mistake was threatening Cinder to death with the relic and Salem thing due to her impatience, otherwise I think Cinder would’ve even tried to keep her around more, specially because Neo got the job done, and her abilities have proven to be really useful until that point, Neo should’ve known better than to send Cinder a death threat because they’re both, well, complicated and paranoid people, but emotions are a thing

But, yes, I still think Neo was trying to fill the void that Roman left and she was starting to see it in Cinder- her fear of being alone is what probably made her stick around instead of deciding to leave to do the job on her own- to me it’s always this deep lmao

I’m starting to think Neo genuinely felt betrayed by Cinder, and what I mean is that Neo wanted Cinder to be her new partner as a makeshift replacement for Roman. I say this because her actions in V7 shows that she wanted what she and Roman had before this point.

In V8, Neo gets tired of waiting to kill Ruby, and it looked like Cinder was genuinely apologetic for not fulfilling her end of the bargain. Many fans think Neo shouldn’t have trusted Cinder, but did she really have any reason not to trust her?

Anyway, the reason I think Neo genuinely felt betrayed is because in V9, we see Cinder is a constant presence in the back of Neo’s mind. Now we don’t know for sure what Cinder represents to Neo, but I interpret it as her feeling of betrayal.

I think Neo wanted to be Cinder’s partner, even if she wasn’t as good as her last one. And I have theorized that aside from revenge, Neo also didn’t want to be alone anymore and she clung to the first person who gave her a reason to keep going. Cinder became that person for better or worse. I always found it odd in V8 that Neo just went with Cinder to Amity, she could’ve just stayed on Monstra and left Cinder to do her plan on her own. However she chose to go with her (probably because Tyrian freaked her out too much lol).

So I think Neo wasn’t mad at Cinder for “tricking her into going after Ruby”, Neo was more upset that someone she had trusted betrayed her.

( @tempusumbra this post goes out to you (if you already pointed this out, I’m sorry lol, but I thought you’d be interested))

[zhongliologist]

Tea Ceremonies | Dom! Zhongli

Pairing: Zhongli x Fem!Reader

Genre: SMUT SMUT SMUT!!!

Words: 3.1k

A/N: No one asked for this but here you go. This was supposed to be another half dragon Zhongli fic, but oh well, the plot went somewhere else. This is btw based on another fic I’m working on which is a Teashop AU,, so Zhongli is the boss, Keqing, Xiao, and the reader are the employees;;;

Warning: THIS IS AN 18+ FIC, SO MINORS OUT THERE, YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. PLEASE READ AT YOUR OWN DISCRETION.

*

After hours in the teashop was almost identical to its opening hours.

It was peaceful and quiet, with all the chairs stowed away and the window covers rolled down—the only difference was the void of loneliness left by the absence of the customers’ chatter. Yet this was the perfect time for you, as a waitress to practice your skills in preparing tea.

While one can say that preparing tea is simply a matter of steeping tea leaves in a pot of hot water, such practice does not bring forth the full flavor and aroma of the tea leaves, and does not completely align with the purpose of the tea shop.

Well, that’s how your boss, Zhongli would say.

Thus, with all the materials before you at the counter and an incense stick lighted up somewhere, you were already in the middle of the tea ceremony. To his credit, it was indeed a meditative task—you can allow yourself to just relax and slowly prepare the tea in meticulous steps Zhongli has instructed you to.

You were already in the middle of heating up the Yixing teapot when the tea sommelier stepped out from the kitchen, his handsome face still calm as ever even after a day’s work.

“Oh? Are you practicing?”

Zhongli asked, walking towards you and observing your actions closely. You suddenly felt self-conscious at his presence; your hand holding the iron kettle trembling.

“I-I…yeah,” you managed to reply, even if you were beginning to flush under his scrutinizing gaze.

You had long realized your massive crush on this man; it wasn’t even a secret to your co-workers Keqing and Xiao, yet as an employee, there was no way for you to act upon your feelings on your boss.

“Careful now,” he muttered behind you, covering your hand with his. “We wouldn’t want to get you scalded.”

Slowly, he guided your hand and poured the hot water on to the Yixing tea pot; the steam making your face even hotter than before. While he was busy teaching you, your mind was definitely elsewhere—concentrating only on how warm your back was against his broad chest, or how close his breath was to your ear.

He brought down the iron kettle back to the heating stand much to your relief. However, unlike what you were expecting, he hasn’t left your side, rather, he felt even closer than before.

What…What is this…?!

Inwardly, you were panicking. There was no way for you to continue the tea ceremony like this. Zhongli was so close, too close that he could be snuggling to you at this point. Your heart beat was racing at a hundred mile per hour yet you couldn’t leave your thoughts aside anymore. Your boss isn’t flirting with you now, is he?!

“What’s the next step, YN?” he asked, forcing you out of your mental dilemma. His voice was sultry, and seductively close to your ear, he could nibble on it any second.

“A-ahh….uh…er…leaves! I’m putting in the leaves!” You exclaimed, hand clammy as you searched for the Da Hong Pao among the containers before you.

When you did finally find it, your hand was slightly trembling as you scooped out a spoonful of it until the pot was four-fifths full. You swear you could die from both nervousness and embarrassment as you wondered if Zhongli saw you clumsily filling in the tea pot.

Yet he only chuckled behind you, making you jump as he propped his head on your shoulders. “Excellent. And then?”

Don’t mind him, YN! Just…Just do what you need to do!

“T-The water….to…to m-moisten the leaves!”

Taking the iron kettle once again, you lifted it up at a certain height and began pouring, aiming towards the rim of the teapot. You kept on willing yourself to focus on your technique, but it seemed like your boss has other ideas.

With his free hand, you felt Zhongli glide up his fingers on your back; slowly and deliberately, as if he was intentionally teasing you.

“Stand up straight now, love.”

The effect was immediate. You jolted up from your position, almost missing the tea pot you were pouring water into.

“S-Sir…!” you exclaimed, wide eyed and flustered. “What are you doing…!”

Zhongli only hummed amusingly, much to your chagrin. “I’m simply correcting your posture. Is something wrong?”

You’re definitely not ‘simply correcting’ my posture!

If only you could say that, but you continued on.

The custom was to pour until the water spills out slightly from the teapot, but you were still a few inches away, no thanks to your boss’ antics.

“Now, listen to how the water sounds as you pour it into the teapot,” he was now back beside your ear, as if he was whispering sweet nothings to you. “Does it not resemble the trickling of a mountain stream? Does it not sound good?”

You weren’t really sure what he was referring to as ‘good’ in his last question, but you knew he wasn’t talking about the water anymore.

“As you add more heat, the tea leaves will gradually unfurl and open up.” He continued, “it’s flavor and aroma unlocking as you begin to moisten it up.”

Are…are those innuendos? You pursed your lips despite how his deep voice sends in waves of arousal down between your legs. You were not giving in. Definitely not.

Looking down, you were glad the water had begun to spill out from the teapot—the iron kettle was beginning to weigh on your arm, and your boss was being such a delightful distraction. Placing the kettle back, you then picked up the lid of the teapot and began scraping away the bubbles that had floated on top.

“You must be gentle with it, YN,” he whispered, voice almost raspy, as his hands settled on your hips. It instantly sent shudders down your spine. “Just like how they say, ‘as gentle as a spring breeze, stroking one’s skin…”

As he said those words, his fingers danced on your waist as it eventually slid down your thighs, and stayed there; meandering lines on your trouser-covered skin with his digits.

You bit your lip, stopping a moan from escaping. It was beginning to feel difficult to breathe since he was already embracing you; feeling you up. Even if this was a surprise, you were relishing at his attention; not wanting him to stop.

“S-Sir…I—!” You closed your eyes tightly as he groped your thigh; making you halt all your actions.

“Don’t stop now. Continue.”

Despite, his deep and gentle voice, you knew what an order was. And so you did what he told you, despite how distracting the weight of his hands were on your sensitive skin.

Carefully, with eyes sharp, Zhongli watched as you continued with the tea ceremony—washing the teacups with the first steep and draining the rest into the tea tray. Once again, you picked up the iron kettle and poured boiling water into the teapot for the final infusion.

“You’re doing an excellent job, love,” he murmured to your ear; lips playfully nibbling. “What will you do now?”

“I…I…mmnh…” you tried to reply, yet his hands only made your heart jump to your throat. “…I have to…p-pour hot water outside…too…”

“For what?” He nuzzled on your neck.

Your hands gripped on the handle of the iron kettle tightly. “To…to i-isolate the heat…inside the pot…”

Zhongli made a low chuckle as it reverberated to your ear and down to the part between your legs. “Correct. Perhaps I shall reward you when you’re done. What do you think, love?”

“Nghh…o-okay…”

You can feel him smirk against your neck. “Well then, you still have a few steps to do. Please continue.”

Yet despite your best efforts, you couldn’t shake the arousal that had long been swirling inside your stomach. Squeezing your thighs together, you tried to seek some sort of friction to at least alleviate the haze of lust that was clouding your thoughts. Much to your dismay, your boss held on to you firmly, unable to do anything but dazedly glance at the unfinished ceremony before you.

“Oh? Do you want to stop now?” he asked, his erection now rubbing against your backside. “Will you forfeit your reward then?”

“N-no…! Wait!” you hurriedly replied, panicking.

Reaching for the teapot, you then poured its contents into the fairness pitcher. It only takes a few seconds for the Da Hong Pao to finish steeping because of the high leaf-to-water ratio, and you were glad you didn’t have to wait for too long.

“Now, now, love,” Zhongli admonished you softly, but it came out more like a purr. “Remember that the tea ceremony should not be hurried. Savor and take pleasure in this activity as much as you can.”

Without warning, he rubbed his leg against your most sensitive spot; earning a surprised yelp from you as you gripped the counter until your knuckles turned white. It was good you weren’t holding anything at that time.

“Nghh….Sir! Please…I can’t—!”

Zhongli only tutted at you, his hands inching dangerously between your legs. “It’s a mere few steps left, YN. Perhaps you don’t deserve a reward after all.”

The threat concealed in his voice was obvious to you—it’s either you continue or he’s gonna leave you like that, wanting and unsatisfied.

You pursed your lips and picked up the fairness pitcher. Even if your hands were trembling, you have to finish the ceremony just as he instructed because you know how much he will stick to his word. Pouring into the fragrance-smelling cups quickly and evenly, you came to the point where there was only a small amount of tea left inside the pitcher.

“And what will you do about that?” he suddenly asked, lips pressing against one sensitive pulse on your neck; his knee rubbing against your core.

You bit down a moan, and gathered what remaining strength you still have left. “I…I…have to pour it…”

Your boss pushed his knee harder, making you mewl against the counter. “Pour how?”

“Ahhh…! Haa….d-drop…by drop…”

You were surprised how you still managed to reply with how he was relentless with his stimulation, but it was far from over.

“Could you show it to me then?”

Damn it, Zhongli! You inwardly cursed him, but there was nothing you could do. This was the most laborious of the ceremony but this was to ensure that the flavor and aroma is even in all cups. God knows what he’s going to pull while you concentrate on doing it.

With what little is left inside the pitcher, you then poured a drop in each teacup, slowly but surely. You could feel him grinning as he perched on your shoulders, his hands lazily and deliberately missing your now drenched core.

Just how long will he continue to tease you?

Your patience had long been worn down into tiny slivers, but Zhongli held control over you as much as how he securely pins you to the counter. You could only chew on your lip as you felt his hard on pressing against you as if he was testing how much you could endure.

 And finally, as if an eternity has passed, the pitcher was empty and you covered all the fragrance-smelling teacups with empty teacups—arranging them into a presentable display.

“S-sir…! I’m d-done—”

Suddenly, Zhongli turned your head towards him and captured your lips into a searing kiss. He was rough and harsh; all nips and bites and tongue as he prodded your lips open. At the same time, he kept on rubbing your core with his leg which you eagerly responded to with a loud moan.

“Here’s your reward, love,” he told you in between kisses, with a lilt of scorn in his voice. “Rub yourself against my leg and come.”

His vicious lips then turned to your neck and shoulders, littering them with bites and marks wherever he went. He would move his lips sensually on a pulse point before sucking and leaving a bruise for everyone to see tomorrow.

“You seem to like this so much, don’t you?” he asked, grinning as his teeth sunk gently on your shoulder. “Do you like being touched by your boss?”

“N-No…sir—I…!”

Zhongli raised an elegant brow. “Oh, you don’t? Perhaps I should stop here then.”

Your half-lidded eyes shot wide open. “N-No! Please don’t….! S-sir…! Please…!”

“Please what?” he asked, gazing at you with such sharp amber eyes.

“I-I…I need you, Sir…! I need to come….p-please! I…I can’t!”

Your boss smirked at you and pulled away.

You panicked in an instant, wondering what you had done wrong. Turning around to see where he went, you were instead bent to the counter, the tea ceremony set already at the side. Quick hands made quick work of your pants until you were only left with your underwear.

Feeling his hands on your hole, you could only moan at his incessant teasing. Fingers prodding and poking but never really committing to making you feel good, your yearning for him inside you only increased further.

“You’ve been so good for me, YN,” you could hear him beside your ear, his chest warm against your back. “I shall fulfill my end of the contract.”

Pushing aside your underwear, he slipped in two fingers inside you, scissoring them on your hot folds. Delirium filled your entire head as you finally felt him give you something more after those long periods of teasing.  You have never expected him to be this merciless but you loved it anyway.

“How amusing. You’re shaking your hips on your own,” he remarked, still pumping his fingers in and out of you. “Perhaps I should’ve filled you with my cock instead?”

“Nghhh…Sir…! Y-yes…ahhh…!”

“Would you like that, hmm?” Zhongli asked, scoffing at you. “You would, wouldn’t you?”

 You could feel his digits now rubbing against your most sensitive spots, driving you closer and closer to climax. But of course, this was Zhongli. As soon as he felt you tighten up around him, he immediately withdrew his fingers and pushed them inside your mouth.

“Mmnhh…..! Ohh…! Haaa….haa—"

“You whine like a poor beast in heat,” he openly mocked you, his now hard shaft rubbing against your hole and covering it with your slick juices. “How adorable.”

With his fingers in your mouth, you can only groan as he gradually entered you, stretching you out with his large dick. Your thoughts were only swirling with ecstasy as he filled you, pushing in and out of your hole.

And in one sharp thrust, Zhongli buried himself fully into you—triggering your climax. Shaking underneath him as your orgasm flooded you, your boss continued to pound into you, unrelenting despite how sensitive you are at that point.

Pulling his fingers out of your mouth, he took a fistful of your hair as he set his brutal pace—smirking as he watched your teary-eyed yet debauched expression.

“You take me in so well, love,” he praised you, though there was a mix of derision in his tone. “You like being fucked by your boss, don’t you?”

“S-Sir…! N-No…Ahhhh….! Nghhh…! Sir! Please…”

At your denial, Zhongli only shoved deeper inside of you, drawing out a long groan from your throat.

“Admit it now, YN. At least your little hole here is being honest,” he continued, shifting so that his cock was rubbing right where it feels so good.  

“No…ahhh….not there! N-not…!”

Zhongli smothered more kisses on your neck, his shaft buried deep inside of you; hitting all the delicious places which were once again pushing you towards your second climax.

“Would you want me to stop then?”

“F-fuck…! No—! I—”

“Then what should I do, love?”

In the face of all the pleasure and stimulation he was giving you, you had to throw all your shame out of the window.

“M-more…! Nghh….sir please…f-fuck me!” you cried out, loving the way Zhongli was chuckling right behind you.

“As you wish.”

Pulling almost out of you, Zhongli then shoved his dick back inside in roughly, earning a throaty mewl from you. He himself could only growl at how tight you kept on gripping him.

“It feels…ahh! S-so…good….! So good—” You repeated as if in a trance.

“I’m close, love….ughh…fuck…!” He groaned, pulling your hair as your back arched. “Take all of my seed…!”

He plunged in deep inside of you, his warm seed filling you up in long bursts while you orgasmed at the same time. You were quivering at how full you were of him, savoring the moment where he clung tightly on you.

“YN…” you heard him whisper your name in his deep voice as if lulling you. “YN…”

“Zhongli…sir…” you muttered back, closing your eyes. “I…I love you…”

“Hush now, love…” you heard him reply softly.

“Zhongli…”

….

—!!

A rude push jerked you awake.

“What are you doing, sleeping in the breakroom?”

Your eyes widened.

It was Xiao, who was looking at you irately, that you first noticed. Then you saw the wooden lockers and the musk green wallpaper of the breakroom.

Wait. You continued processing what had happened.

“…what?” you asked him, disoriented.

“What do you mean what?” he replied. “Go home if you’re tired! It’s already closing time!”

“Huh…?”

Xiao leaned his head to the side. “Why are you so dazed? Still on dreamland?”

That…! That was all a dream?!

Everything that had happened—you covered your face with your hands—everything that Zhongli did….it was all a dream?! Inwardly, you grimaced. You thought something had finally progressed between the two of you, but at the same time, you realized you can’t look at him in the eyes after all of that.

The door creaked open.

“What’s the matter here?”

As soon as you heard those words, you jumped—face flushing instantaneously. Just as luck would have it, the real Zhongli had to appear as soon as you realized your dilemma. Not knowing what to do, you could only stare at the real Zhongli, who was gazing at you oh-so-innocently. That is, until your brain finally imploded.

You stood up.  

“I-I…! I-I think I’m going home now! Bye!” You declared loudly, gathering most of your things from your locker and raced pass through the two men in a matter of seconds. It would also be best to call tomorrow a day off.

Xiao watched as you dashed through the back door as if you were being chased by hilichurls and raised a brow.

“Don’t you think YN looks a bit red just now?” he asked Zhongli, who only shrugged.

“She seems fine to me,” the tea sommelier replied with a flippant tone in his voice which seemed to have alerted the perceptive Xiao.

“And what about you?” he asked before the older male could escape. “You seem to be in high spirits.”

“Am I? Perhaps you’re imagining it.”

“What did you do?”

Zhongli only blinked and smiled. “Have you ever heard of ‘gifting dreams and visions’?”

[cheekygreenty]

Leave Me Lonely p.2 - The Darkling x Reader

Part 1 is here 😝 also there’s so many song requests and majority are Ariana Grande and I’ve never been a fan of her but omg some of the songs you guys requested are absolutely amazing so I think I kinda like her now

He wasn't waiting at the gates for you nor was he in your shared chambers when you returned, your rugged appearance only alarming to the Healers as Ivan basically carried you through the Little Palace halls. You were blind by the rage bubbling inside of you and numbed by the humiliation seeping deep into your bones.

Not only was it because of the hushed whisper fight back in the camp where he didn't hold back on his jabs or his volume, but now he left you to hang, blatantly ignoring you and prioritizing a girl over his partner in a potentially fatal attack. It was bound to let loose a million and one different rumors, rumors where you suffered the most. No Grisha would dare blame their General, and no matter how much respect they had for you, you were always going to be the scapegoat. It happened before and will happen again, but this time you had a fleeting suspicion he wouldn't defend you.

My heart has had enough, of the give and take

The urge to cry was overwhelming as you shed your clothing and slipped into the scorching bath. Your muscles and bruises ached from the fighting and horseriding but you hurt the most.

Today wasn't the first time you let tears slip out because of Aleksander, in fact, you only ever cry because of him. You loved him so much, yet all that came from your relationship lately was heartache and pain. One good day without a fight equaled days of unrest and tensions. You were exhausted and drained, nothing made you happy anymore. It was as if he was sucking the joy out of your life but simultaneously was the only thing to give you joy.

Danger, how you hold me.

The sweet nothings he whispered into your ear as you fell asleep, the talks of a better future where he spoke of marrying you, even something as small as holding your hand while walking through Palace gardens. It all made you smile and set the memories into the concrete of your mind, holding onto them when times got tough.

But now times were tough, they were at a peak and the good memories were replaced by all the bad ones. You tried to fight them, tried to fight the horrible voice in your head that screamed as loud as it could: Let him go.

The bawling started then and never ceased. The water got cold but you didn't seem to care that you were shaking from the temperature, or were you shaking from the realization you would have to end it with Aleksander? You didn't know. Only when a knock sounded on the door did you momentarily stop.

'Ms.Y/L/N, Should I send in the Healer to finish working on you?' a maid questioned.

'In a minute.' You cringed at your voice, it was raw and croaky from your fit of sobs. You got up and grabbed the black robe, securing it on your body before opening the door and letting the Healer do his job. Usually, the itching would annoy you, but this time you paid it no mind as you reflected on your situation.

He finished working on your leg in a matter of minutes and excused himself just as another maid brought in your dinner. You ate alone in the confines of your bedroom, your hair still wet and donning his robe. There was no energy in you to get dressed or to move to the bed to sleep your tiredness off. You wouldn't until he got here.

You needed to put yourself first, to set your foot down and demand his attention. You wanted to be the old Y/N, the one before Aleksander got to you. She was kind and sweet, a humble orphan, never feared by anyone, and good at her job. You hoped you could be her again, hoped that Aleksander's smooth words wouldn't wind you in again and chop a piece of you away.

The doors finally opened and his boots echoed along the hardwood floors.

'You're back.' He came up to you and kissed the top of your head where your hair was now perfectly dry. Before today you would've thought it was a sweet gesture, an endearing kiss to show his love, but now you saw it for what it was: routine.

He continued further into the room, not noticing your tear-stained face or puffy eyes.

'I brought the Sun-Summoner before the King today, I have his permission to train her, it's as if he thought I cared for his opin-' He paused, eyes finally taking you in. You stared out the window in front of you, the same place you had been looking at for hours. He took note of the scrapes on your hands and bruise on the side of your temple, but what garnered his interest was the look of pure melancholy on your face.

'Y/N?'

'You left me there, left all of us'

'What?' He was taken aback.

'There were four times as many of them as there was us and you left.' Your voice was void of any emotion.

'There was plenty of Grisha with you, Ivan was there. Besides, they would have fled knowing I was there.'

'You're not getting it, I was there.' That's all that should matter to you. 'They didn’t flee. I almost died Aleksander. You told me to give my kefta to her and it almost cost me my life.'

'She's the Sun-Summoner.'

'I don't care.' You spit with venom so strong he flinched but stayed quiet but you continued, letting the ball drop. 'I'm leaving the Little Palace. Station me somewhere around the borders. It's for the best.'

As soon as the words left your lips another wave of pain washed over you. How were you supposed to live without him? My love knows no bounds, and it yearns for a man that doesn't care for me.

'You're leaving me?'

'It's for the best.' You repeated and looked away from him, not being able to stand his poised face and calm composure. He was supposed to be upset, shout and scream for you to stay, but he looked....normal.

‘I’m sure the Second Army could do with a skilled soldier on one of the fronts. I’m no good rotting here in the palace.’

He stayed silent and as the seconds ticked by, it was visible his demeanor was falling apart.

'The best for me or you?' There it was, denial. The slight edge to his voice and the flexing of his hands, perhaps even the glisten to his eye.

'Don't do this, don't turn this around on me Aleksander. I have spent the majority of these last few months crying because of you. I have nobody to turn to, all my friends are scared me, they fear me and it's all your fault.' You wiped the tears as they rolled down your face with the sleeve of his black robe. 'I can't do this anymore.'

'You can't just up and run.' Is he upset about his best soldier leaving or me leaving?

'What else am I to do?'

'You don't have to leave the Palace' He took small steps towards you, the reality of the situation hitting him.

'I do. For if I stay I'll see you around and I'll hurt even more. Please, let me go.' You went back to staring out the window because if you had to look at his devasted face, you would crumble.

He kneeled down beside you and tried to grasp your hands but you pulled away. Out of the corner of your eyes, you could see his head drop in defeat. You wanted to reach out, hug him, tell him you're staying, put a stop to his sadness but that voice screamed again: Put yourself first. You're the one who's been hurting to make sure he's okay.

'I'll stay in a spare room from now until I leave'

The chair squeaked as you stood up, but Aleksander stayed put. You went to leave, to put all this behind you and start fresh, bring the old Y/N back, but a whisper pulled you back. With your forehead resting against the cool of the door, you resisted the urge to turn around.

'I love you Y/N.'

'I know, I love you too'

I'd rather you leave me lonely, even though it hurts

You're a dangerous love

---------

Taglist

@aleksanderwh0r3 @theonelittleone @searching-for-gallifrey @lostysworld @0-artemis @exo-1204 @staradorned @bookfrog242 @simp-for-ben-barners @keepdaydreamingbb @acciorudolphx @pansysgirlfriend @pansysgirlfriend @justmesadgirl

[gra-sonas]

I'm the nonnie that wanted advice, thank you for agreeing! English is not my native language, so I will try to make as much sense as I can. First, I want to say that this is not about the RNM/Malex fandom (I follow several people from that fandom, you being one of them, since I ship Malex but this is not about them). One of the reasons I created a Tumblr was to enjoy my ships and to try to connect to other people, since it's hard for me to make friends in real life. So, little by little I started to interact with blogs of that other fandom, reblogging their stuff, commenting, sending asks, even sending some messages. And some people started to talk to me, however, it feels very forced, it feels like they are trying to be nice, but they really don't want to talk to me or include me. And I can easily see that because other “newer” blogs, like mine, get treated differently, much more friendly, and they don't get ignored which I feel like I do. I'm always the one that has to make the first move, but with others it's not like that. I know that I'm jealous, and I shouldn't be, but I have wanted so bad to belong somewhere that I can help it. I don't know if I should just give up, stop trying, and get out of that fandom. Maybe I'm the problem, and I'm just never going to be able to connect to people. Sorry for coming to you with this, it's just that you are always so nice and kind that you made me feel like I could ask you this. You don't have to answer, I know it's too much and that you have nothing to do with it.

Oh nonnie, I'm so sorry that you're feeling that way. :(

I know how hard it is to get into a fandom, especially when you're not a writer or a fan artist/gif maker (i.e. a "contributor" - even though people who comment and send asks are just as important, but I hope you understand what I mean).

On top of that, Tumblr is honestly a terrible platform to make fandom friends (at least in my experience).

What Tumblr is lacking imo (and what makes me miss Livejournal an awful lot) is a way to have any kind of [ongoing] discussion. Or proper [nested!!!] comments. Yes, you can reply to a post, but unless someone checks the notes, no one will see that reply.

Basically, Tumblr is everyone just sitting on their personal island (i.e. blog) yelling into the void, hoping that someone else will hear them. And even if someone hears them yell, and maybe even replies, it's almost impossible to have an actual conversation, let alone build friendships. Tumblr's just not designed for that.

Personally, I’ve had much more luck on Twitter or Discord to find “my people” - platforms much more suitable for conversations, and the focus isn’t as much on “contributing” (in the form of providing or sharing content). (Personally, I loathe IG, but it’s also a platform where you can comment, and that probably also works for some people).

So, my advice would be: try to find “your people��� outside of Tumblr. Maybe there’s a Discord server for your fandom where you can actually talk to people (and more than just one person at a time, also people who might not live in a different time zone and won’t reply immediately when you send them an ask 🙃).

If you don’t have Twitter, maybe set up an account and see whether the platform is for you (it’s not for everyone, I know, but I love it and it’s my favorite), but in my experience it’s much easier to get in touch with people there than on Tumblr.

Tumblr is nice for sharing content (even though that’s become a bit of a lost art these days, reblogs are a near extinct art form tbh :P) but it’s shit for forming and becoming a member of a community. And I say that as someone who’s been on this hellsite for over a decade, and has always “contributed” - in some  way at least.

In short: it’s not you, nonnie. I’m sure you are lovely, and anyone would be lucky to have a fandom friend like you who puts so much effort into connecting with others. And I’m truly sorry that you feel like it’s your fault.

It’s not. It really isn’t. (And feeling a bit jealous is a perfectly understandable reaction. You’d be surprised how often I’ve felt like someone who looks at fandom through a window from the outside but is never part of it. That feeling SUCKS big time).

I really hope you’ll be able to find like-minded people elsewhere, where it is easier to connect and talk to people.

Wishing you the best of luck, nonnie! (And hey, if you’d like a Twitter fandom friend, let me know, I’m always happy to chat with people on the bird app) ❤️