#other than hard cheeses that is
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Today has been a great day for the lactose intolerant girl :)
#i should've done my research loooool but i learned that there ARE certain dairy products that i can eat#other than hard cheeses that is#so i have greek yoghurt in my fridge >:)))))#there was also salted lactose free butter at the store which i bought. naturally#but the PRICE of BUTTER man. the PRICE. this is like half a brick#and it cost maybe 5 CAD or possibly more
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These clown animatronics in FNAF wild as hell..
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#fnaf fanart#ennard#the mimic#jackie fnaf#fnaf sister location#secret of the mimic#michael afton#I really wanted to draw Jackie again#I love her design especially her silly extendo arms#some folks think Ennard and Jackie might be the same robot#like Ennard was gonna be a Funtime Jackie#which I think would be really neat to finally know what Ennard was supposed to be#Jackie hopeful gets along with the other clown animatronics#it’s funny to compare these two#CAUSE AS OF NOW Jackie has done much#we won’t know all her crimes till later#but I will say Ennard probably set the bar 💀#it’s hard to get more freaky than him but we’ll see if Jackie can do it#Jackie gives me very ‘cheesed to meet you’ vibes if that makes any sense
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Sometimes at work it's not my place to tell people the things I want to say, and I find I often go home at the end of the rougher days to stand blankly in my shower and tell myself over and over what I wish I could pass on.
This accomplishes very little, and mostly just gives me a tension headache, but through it all I think I've narrowed myself down to a few solid things I'd like to tell people the most.
You can't change people. Not permanently, not for anythig. You can support them, encourage them, love them, give them tools and opportunities and resources, but you can't make them change. They can change themselves if they want to, but they have to want to, and they have to want it for themselves, because they're the only one that's certain to be with them forever.
For better or worse, you make your own choices, and blaming bad choices on others doesn't only work to absolve you of responsibility- it also robs you of control. Because if you say you only did something because I did something, then you arent only shifting blame- you're admitting that you cannot control yourself, that you cannot truly make choices for yourself, that other people can control you- and as long as you truly beleive that, you'll keep facing the same problems over and over. You'll keep letting others dictate your choices, because you'll beleive that they can, and you'll never be free.
White knights on horseback are from fairytales. Nobody can help you if ou're not willing to help yourself. To try, to put the dirty work in, to belive you're worth that effort- Act as though nobody is coming to save you. From a struggle, from pain, from bad relationships, from yourself. And when you do save yourself, because you will, because failure here isn't an option if you want to survive, you'll never find another dragon that can keep you prisoner.
Don't say anything to anyone that you wouldn't want them remembering forever.
Doing the right thing in bad circumstances is hard. It's the hardest thing. But if you make the choice to do that hard thing anyways, despite your fear, you'll go on the rest of your like knowing that you're the sort of person who did something.
The present only seems the hardest because the past I over and the future hasn't happened.
There's so much joy ahead of you, the kind you can't possibly understand until you see it yourself.
The responsibility of consequences is often disguised as the power of permission. "I won't do this if you help me", "I'll work on my anger if you do this for me", "I promised you I'd quit, but can I have just one?". The unspoken question is, "Can it be your fault if this goes badly?"
You cant make someone love you the way you need to be loved. Someone can love you very much and still be bad for you, even if you love them very much in return. Two people can love each other very, very much, and try their very best, and still be wrong for each other.
Sometimes being near to someone changes you, even in good ways, and the people you become don't fit together as well as the people you were.
Caring takes work. Even if it's real. Especially if it's real. And the most important gestures aren't the grand, poetic, songs-and-flowers-and-tears moments; they're getting out of bed even though you don't want to. Paying attention to things you don't enjoy. Scrubbing pans, or opening a window, saying "thank-you", or helping carry groceries into the house. The small things fill the big things- without the small, boring, mediocre things, big things feel hollow.
Thrre is honour and dignity in humble work.
If you are a cruel and spiteful person, then you will find every place you visit to be full of the same cruel, spiteful people. This is not because the world is as cruel as you, but because everywhere you are, you will be disliked. This is the curse that comes with being persistently cruel and spiteful.
If you are a kind and ppsitive person, you will repeatedly encounter kind and positive people, because as they grow familiar with you, they will be happier to have you near. This is the reward of being a kind and positive person.
When splitting paths with loved ones, briefly or forever, aim for your last words to always be "I love you".
#I'm still so young and ignorant#but I wish someone had told ME these things before I had to learn them#And now when shit goes south and everything is over and calm again the same things just roll though my head#Over and over and over#It's like everyone I meet has the same 3 problems and its ruining their lives#I just want to take everyone I meet by the shoulders and shake them#I KNOW why this is happening to you#Do you realize you can be better?#Do you realize you can do it?#Aren't you terrified of wasting your life like this?#*I* want to be happier#*I* used to be so much worse than I am#And I don't have it all figured out#But if we all decide to help ourselves then it'll be that much easier to help each other#Right?#It's so hard to lift dead weight#You need to kick against the waves with me#You need to WANT to float#Do you understand#Ugh it's 6am#This has been your overdramatic midnight ramble#Imma grill me a cheese and go back to bed#Blaurfhgh
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because i’m curious and my family disagrees.
pls reblog for bigger sample size and put in the tags where you’re from!!
#like. i will eat whatever. pizza is pizza#yes there is pizza that is better than other pizza#but i have yet to have BAD pizza#its bread and cheese and sauce. hard to fuck up#shut up kay
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I can't do much productively during the heat wave/health issue flare up/etc. like work on my games or anything where I have to sit at the computer/type for long periods of time, BUT.. I did passively sculpt a few tiny foods lol. I wanted to do one of my bigger usual sculptures, but those take so much more time and concentration, I thought something small just to keep my hands busy would be better.. close up photos look kind of weird and blurry from my camera settings or something, but overall they came out okay, especially in person.. Nearly the only reason I ever wanted to buy dolls as a kid was to get my hands on the miniature foods and plates and stuff that came with them, I've always just been obsessed with small versions of things like that, so.. why not make some! lol
#sculpture#ooops.. i could have posted this on the art blog but I forgor and do not feel like reuploading everything#into a new drafted post on a whole other blog.. not in this heat.. i have no patience lol#items are: tomato. asparagus. a four leaf clover (not food lol). some sort of folded bun or dumpling with meat inside (not based on#anything specific. I just wanted to fold a flat sheet of clay into a shape). pomegranate. cheese wheel. lemon slice. some sort of mushroom.#fish (not a real one. just made up. if it looks like any specific fish that'd be interesting). and fig.#I haven't been able to get many avocaodo pits to carve again. so sculpting. then is good for a tiny craft#WISH I COULD DO COSTUMES OR SOMETHING.. i have some pikced out. bundles of clothes laying on the floor of the closet#but GODS even before the heat wave it's just been so warm.. I know.. it's the summer. of course it's warm#but WHYYYyy............. what if it just snowed all year around and was awesome and beautiful and i was so cold and could wear 25 blankets#at all times.. what about THAT hmm?? .. the ideal..#anyway.. my favorite is the pomegranate and the mushroom maybe#The fig is hard because in the pictures of figs I googled a lot of them have that sort of white powdery type of thing on the outside#that grapes and plums and stuff have sometimes and it's hard to convey that weird like.. sheen.. plus the purple with almost powdery blue#and little lighter specks plus streaks of light green and a little orangey on some of them.#It's okay in person I think but this doesnt show up as much in pictures. The cheese also looks betterin person than images. you can't tell#the slight shine in the pictures lol. but the pomegranates look cool and also photograph decent.. hmm#I should have made toast with an egg on it or something. that would be a nice addition#OH ALSO ASPARAGUS MY BELOVED.. though they look a little wonky. the cuticle pusher tool that I sculpt with in leiu of any actual sculpting#tools has a kind of triangle edge that was suite for the little leaf details of the asparagus so that was cool. its like..ALMOST right lol
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Odypen definitely and equivalently adore each other BUT I weirdly can't see them as the type to actually say "I Love you".
They still definitely vocalize their love for each other but it's more so in "My Joy", and "Extraordinary Woman", "Strange Woman/Man", etc. And very cheesy lines (both say some cheesy shit in the Odyssey, and he definitely does in the Iliad as well. "Joy like a drowning sailor seeing land" bit???)
I could see "I adore you" but even then, that's probably during very specific moments but the actual "I love you"??? I just typed it just now for fic shit and... It weirdly just didn't feel right and I don't know why. 😅
Idk maybe it's kind of because I see them as over the top in ways, they love wordplay and riddles and I think they'd almost think "...That's not good enough >:( " about it??? I don't know???😂
#I wrote this last night. I'll do the asks I got later. don't worry! :D#I am the cheese god remember?😅#I think these two would try to “out-cheese” each other and whoever is left speechless first loses#“I would forget my own name before I would ever forget you” bullshit. CHEESY#And yes. “I sleep in our nest with you or outside on the dirt” stupidity >:D#I plan for Odysseus as a beggar to ask why she waits so long. As he's been gone a longer amount of time than the time they had together#(Simply asking as reassurance. He knows his answer. Calypso asked him. but what about Penelope?) but she gets mad at the#“Beggar” and pities him as he must be telling the truth about having a miserable life if he never got the chance to know such devotion#How what they have could never be sullied by#something as trivial as distance and years. How the years with him were the best in her life. Only made better by their son.#'My dear Joy made songs and poems about love a reality as that was simply the life we shared. Even separated our 'song' will always echo#no matter how long it's been. I'LL make sure it always does. And I know he's doing the same... That strange man used to say that#even if he died his corpse would drag itself back to us before he'd ever give up.'#...I'm not one for 'odyssey zombie au' but when I first heard it yeah. :'D Came up with this back then#“His eyes as hard as flint or horn-” Bullshit! The sad lil fuck is hiding sobs with coughs and telling her to keep away for fear of her#catching whatever “illness” he has. The nice thing about being disguised as old means sickly old man works.#...#I'm noticing that Odysseus has a lot of silly oneliners while I write Penelope with a shit ton of set up :'D#They are so silly and I love them so much#...I wrote a lot :'D#Mad rambles#shot by odysseus#my headcanons#odypen#yahoo!!!#sometimes I wonder if I should tag this with more things but I don't want to taint the regular tags with my bullshit :'D I KNOW I'm insane
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Another dog show in the books!
We showed in a sporting dog specialty this morning and she did beautifully! Great stacking, great gaiting, honestly just awesome. The judge really focused on expression which is not our strong suit (Rory bounces between a melted "omg you're my best friend in the world" face and a "I can't see you there's a pepperoni I want" face) and she ultimately awarded it to the other dog in our class. I felt like she gave Rory a fair look though and Rory really did great!
We also showed in an all breed show this afternoon but unfortunately it was so so so so so warm and the show was so delayed we went in a little frazzled. Rory tried her best but she was a little overwhelmed and really tired so we didn't gait well. The judge also mumbled instructions and I couldn't tell what she wanted me to do (I was first in our class) and I feel like she just gave up on having me do things. She gave Rory a really thorough look before she awarded the other dog though so that was nice!
I'm excited for tomorrow! It is unfortunately another afternoon show but we don't have anything in the morning so hopefully we can get in the game. We have a lot of really nice competition so I'm not expecting anything, but it's been really nice practice so far anyway!
#show dog chronicles#about aurora#there were 12 and 15 brittanies today respectively!#tomorrow there will be 13 i believe#i would love to just place above one dog#just win the junior puppy female class#i dont need to move up to winners!#just one non-default ribbon#the other junior puppy female is soooo nice though#although less trained than rory (which is saying a lot lol)#but she is less awkward adolescent#i cant be a hater about jt#rory tried really really hard and ate a lot of string cheese so she came out a winner in my heart
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thinking of that post that's like being a picky eater as a kid just means i get to experience the joy of trying so many foods as an adult. i have some new foods planned for this week after i move including stir fried sweet and sour veggies + rice and omurice (really simple fried rice... may add veggies to it later if i like it but one step at a time). will let you guys know how it goes
#shay speaks#i want to try and eat healthier and its going to start somewhere on god#i tried doing this last year but living with someone else really hindered my mental ability to do that#mostly bc. she took up so much space in our fridge#having my fridge and freezer 2 myself is going to help a lot i hope. and no other people to walk in on me cooking#it's going to be a slow process but i want to have a better relationship with food#my other goal is to have at least one higher effort meal a week. if not more but at least one#higher effort than making like maccy cheese or pizza rolls yeah?#also i was in the middle of typing my tags when my parents called me up for dinner and then served smth that makes my arfid#flare up. which is meatballs. they marinated the meatballs in the sauce which does wonders for my brain thinking smth is inedible#meat is still a hard no most of the time for me so uhm. not fun.#too many awful memories around that in particular. same with alfredo lmao i've briefly mentioned why i hate alfredo here before#horrible horrible sauce do not put me in the same room as it please and thankies#anyway.
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"Oh, it's cheap! It only costs 5 dollars"
I'm going to scream, I can't afford that shit! Specially because of taxes shit costs double!!!!! You think I'm spending like 10k pesos in a stupid game or comic? I'm buying food for a couple of days with that money, Jesus Christ
#bye an sanity#half of it goes into cheese and the other half into meat and I already used more than what that fucking game is worth#also I think it's even more than 10k but I refuse to look because it will only make me depressed#and the fact that y'all can have consoles like a toy is insane#only people with a lot of money or that saved money for a ling time have consoles#''oh it's cheap'' I want you to hit your head on a wall as hard as you can
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Okay no you know what? I’ve held my tongue on this for long enough (everyone in my life knows my opinion on this topic) - I have a very deep beef with chain restaurants changing their soft pretzels as if that isn’t a direct personal attack against me, specifically. First it was Applebees beer cheese and pub pretzels like 5 years ago. They used to look like this:
Long, skinny, look like they’d be dry as fuck but they were soft on the inside with a delightfully crisp exterior and the beer cheese was DIVINE. This is what they replaced it with:
This switch happened around the same time Applebees added breadsticks w/ Alfredo dipping sauce to their list of appetizers. When I tell you that these things are just straight up the breadsticks with a spray tan. I’m not sure if the breadstick flavor made the beer cheese taste like Alfredo, if they mistakenly gave me Alfredo sauce, or if they straight up replaced the beer cheese with Alfredo sauce. I can tell you that I tried it at two different locations (hoping the second would have the old ones) and then swore off Applebees forever.
But you wanna know a recent, even more heinous soft pretzel betrayal? Monk’s Bar & Grill. I don’t think I’ll even have to explain this one. Here’s the old pretzel option:
And here’s what they replaced it with:
They don’t even salt these bland, dry, cheap bites. Monks, how could you?
I hope Culver’s doesn’t get any wise ideas from these chumps.
#also monks changed their cauliflower bite recipe so now my vegan friend can’t eat them there’s no point going#Applebees is dead to me forever idgaf#unless they bring the good shit back then I’ll be there daily#used to order the pretzels to go just bc I was craving them fuck you whichever Applebees team made that choice!! u suck!!!!!#this is just a pretzel post but I know this isn’t an original experience for people having their safe foods recipes changed#taco John’s switched up their cheese for their quesadillas and that was a hard truth to face lmao#also to be clear I have no beef with pretzel bites other than the cheep ones piss me off#Culver’s pretzel bites are great and I’m thankful they became a permanent menu item#but like#why would monks think going from a braid to bites would be good? just to make it ‘more shareable’?#my guy that braid was my entre there was no sharing#that and the cauliflower bites were a 10/10 combo#also am aware that these complaints are silly but I just reposted something about soft pretzels and wanted to vent passionately#and also find those pictures of the old Applebees pretzels cuz lots of people have no clue what I’m talking about#arfid#soft pretzel#food rant#autistic things#personal#‘they’re both bad chains!’ is a valid point I have no rebuttals they got rid of the only things worth fighting for 😤
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While I did 0 actual work today, I have managed to get several “been meaning to do but never got around to it” things including:
Replaced the bed lamp I have wanted to replace literally since my sister bought it for me 3 years ago with no input from me*
Rearranged my living room
Put all my sheet music (piano) into a binder so it’s not constantly avalanching off the stand
Found a place for my green ottoman/table/faux suede thingy
Got a case for my phone (which has been nakey since I got it in January and yes I am extremely prone to dropping it)
Put away all my clothes
Did so much laundry
* it’s a perfectly nice lamp and it looks great in my entryway, it just very much was never intended to be a bedside lamp and risked blinding me every single night
#attempted to get a new cable for my hard drive but was thwarted by the world’s sjittiest Best Buy#ate so many Mac and cheese bites for no reason#lidl is so upsettingly much cheaper than the other grocery stores and I rlly should go more#but unfortunately it does sort of give me the Costco overwhelm#personal#me reasserting control over my life by rearranging furniture? perish the thought!!#also life lesson: having a functional washing machine is extremely load bearing it turns out
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Having salivated over European food yesterday, here’s the head children’s takes on gastronomy:
#just pav things#Inigo’s favourite food has and will always be paella 🥘#that or a good creamy risotto. rice in it’s most flavourful and nutritious forms is his comfort food ✨#And it makes sense because rice is filling! It helps tide over the heightened anxiety that comes with not eating for long stretches of time#And he also has an affinity for seafood considering he was born in Seraphin. The fondness for it is in his blood.#Especially prawns~ (good thing Amonea has many of them!)#Dism’s tastes in food lies more in the rich saucy/soupy realm of dishes#like coq au vin because I can tell he would like chicken the best#though if he’s anything like me than rajsko omačka should be his favourite 😋#he loves soup and stew :) (remember he had all the time in the world once to slow cook and develop the flavours of these to heaven ✨)#Cynthia’s palate can only be described as unrefined but she loves pizza (don’t they all? don’t we all?)#Matching her high sugar intake anything with a high amount of lipids (fats) is also in her tastes#like cheese and fried things and fried cheese (have u ever tried a cheese schnitzel? THEY’RE SO UNHEALTHY BUT THEY’RE GREAT)#Archie likes his food spicy >:3 He has a much higher spice tolerance than his brother#It’s a direct influence of the spiriters btw. They’ve dulled his sense of taste alongside his vision#And so Archie enjoys spicy things because he can feel something actually ✨#He also likes his starches in the form of noodles 🍝 (Dism is privy to potatoes— especially mashed potatoes— instead)#Archie will eat literally anything though let’s be real. He’s gone through too much food insecurity to be picky#He’d still cry (positive) if you gave him a beautiful cut of red meat though#Very much an enjoyer of bourguignon :> or steak. he’s more carnivorous than one might assume looking at his physique#And unlike the flavour enthusiasts that are the boys Idyllia much prefers things that are subtle and reserved#lending herself more towards pudding and yoghurt and crème brulee#or waffles with maple syrup! Croissants! Flaky little pastries! Things that are easily digestible bc of her medical treatment#And Archie’s kids? Luna likes foods with soft textures. Theon has no preferences because of his upbringing and finds ordering food hard#Ewan is notoriously picky but he likes homestyle creamy cooking with game meat. I like the implied cannibalism that arises from this.#Rabbits ofc are game meat and honestly if the people of Phyme were eating each other that would only add to the cult vibes ✨✨✨✨
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HAIKYUU ESSAY TIME YAYAYAYA
today's essay idea was brought upon me in the midst of my post-athletics recovery and WILL be my most batshit insane one yet. less facts more feelings. this essay is HEAVILY CENTERED around kghn so it'll only be, like, 15% factually accurate, 85% insane. because there are definitely other non-relationship focused nuances in what i'm about to show you that i shall be choosing to ignore- i'm just clarifying that i DO know they're there, i'm just crazy.
Let us begin.
to provide context, i'll be speaking about Season 1 Episode 23. this is the first official Seijoh match, which they're tied with Karasuno 1-all. this is the final set and the tension is to typical dramatized Haikyuu standard.
Kageyama has just set the ball to Asahi, of which he successfully pulled off a pipe attack, earning Karasuno yet another point. we now proceed to take a look into Kageyama's thoughts post-point:
i'd say this is pretty standard for Kageyama. his game sense when it comes to volleyball is off the charts. dude could probably perfectly play a game in his SLEEP if he really wanted to. knowing where the best attacks will come from, how he'll set the ball- all of that is second nature to him.
and that, my friends, is what makes this line all the more interesting:
because, yes, Hinata did call for the ball, but based on what Kageyama just mentioned, tossing the ball to Hinata should have been ruled out entirely by this point. hell, Kageyama wasn't even FACING Hinata when he called for the ball. Kageyama was literally in the perfect position, perfect timing, perfect EVERYTHING to give it to Asahi.
Yet he nearly gave it to Hinata.
and the fact that he nearly gave it to Hinata is insane enough on its own, but the way Kageyama puts it here: "He nearly took the set away from me." emphasis on the "took [it] away"
Hinata, just by calling out "send it my way," was enough to take the instincts that Kageyama has had and been fostering for his entire lifetime and just throw them all away. Hinata has taken all the game sense Kageyama has built up just by calling for the ball. THAT'S THE KIND OF IMPACT HE HAS ON KAGEYAMA.
(additionally: this kind of impact is almost expected considering the fact that Hinata has established himself as someone that Kageyama can always fall on, having promised to hit any toss he sends his way regardless of how fast or shitty it is.)
one call. one "send it my way." one jump from a place that Kageyama can only see out of the very corner of his eye. that's all it takes.
to paraphrase insanely: with respect to Hinata, all it takes to completely bend Kageyama- an absolute PRODIGY of a player- to your will is to simply call for the ball. that's it. everything could be perfect to send it left, but if Hinata's going right and he wants it, all he has to do is call for it and there's a chance Kageyama will send it to the right. one call. no need to argue.
and then we also get this absolute BLESSING of a frame. absolutely stunning, beautiful, amazing. i eat it up every time.
(the nuance that normal people would see here is essentially: Hinata is such a great decoy that he can even lure his own teammates. which. like. yeah, that also happens. Kageyama is definitely being lured in. i've just decided to take the less normal route and fixate on a completely arbitrary yet still very important aspect of the show- aka Kageyama and Hinata's relationship.)
this scene in particular also ties in nicely to that one bit in season 3 where Oikawa goes to watch the Shiratorizawa vs. Karasuno match and says "Hinata's got Tobio wrapped around his finger" OUGH that one always gets me.
anyways: this is basically one of the five occasions (that i can think of off the top of my head) in which the show points out that Hinata is the one calling the shots here. like, it's never been "Kageyama tosses and Hinata spikes," it's always been "Hinata spikes wherever the fuck he wants to, Kageyama just has to get the ball to him" WHICH IS ABSOLUTELY WILD IF YOU ASK ME
idk. they just. yeah :) they're so cool :)
#Hinata “he's large but i'm in charge” Shouyou everybody!#like. tobio may be a prodigy. but when hinata wants a toss BY GOD WILL KAGEYAMA GIVE HIM THAT TOSS#which makes a shit ton of sense because like. did you SEE their faces when they pulled off that quick attack the first few times?#they LOVE that shit. absolutely love it. nothing is better.#(except playing in official world-level matches against each other. but that's another long post for another time)#speaking of which the fic i currently have in the works touches upon kghn being on separate teams and how them being on the same team is#actually just worse#because that's a take i see sooooooo often#“omg noooo the boyfriends have to be on the same team foreverrrr” okay How does it feel to be Wrong. actually#because last time i checked Tobio was cheesing so hard while he was playing against Hinata that one time#even when they LOST POINTS BECAUSE OF HINATA!!!!!! tobio was like “>v<” I CAN'T STAND GAY PPL SOMETIMES#like Girl ur team just lost a point. a whole Set. even. and you're SMILING??????#they can be so insufferable sometimes#and like obviously hinata loves playing against tobio because. you know. if he wins then he's better and there's nothing better than keepin#promises you made 10 years ago#and they also need to be on separate teams to continue to improve and get better and#you know what maybe i WILL write that other long post some time#maybe after i've finished the fic. just so i can clarify things#anyways#volleyball guys#haikyuu#kagehina#shobio#hinakage#long post#there we go :)
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*
#update on the vegan cheese:#i think i left it to ferment a smidge too long bc i would have preferred it a bit less tangy#(not sure if the tanginess is an error or by design)#also the texture is more 'weird hard hummus' rather than bucokäse like it was in the video#and in retrospect i may have gone overboard on the garlic powder#But other than that it's fine#i'd give it another go for sure#if i didn't feel bad about wasting so many cashews#a solid 7/10
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"I would not mind eating an apple that had had a caterpillar crawl over its peel." Is very funny to me. Where else are caterpillars supposed to crawl? Just wipe off the apple, his little feetsies tracks aren't even visible.
And also, "would you eat this" and "are you grossed out by this" are two unrelated questions.
#17.25% but it's inaccurate#mold is dangerous and I have realistic measures for determining if there's invisible mold on things#the other side of a block of hard cheese is fine#marmelade is soft and squishy and not fine#I have texture issues that have nothing to do with disgust (they operate kind of like an allergy? it's hard to explain)#so I won't eat wilty salad greens unless it's the only plant in the house#but I answered those based on disgust rather than other issues#(eg if one is allergic to oranges one would answer the moldy marmelade question based on the mold and not on the marmelade itself)#So the percentage score for fruit and veggies is inaccurate because “won't eat” and “am grossed out by” are not the same thing
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Non autistic people older than me: Do this thing.
Me: I don't know how to do this thing. I get that some things we learn by doing, but I could cause real harm if I don't do this thing properly. Since you clearly know how to do the thing and I don't, could you give me some more information on what you expect of me?
NAPOTM: No. You just do the thing.
Me: Ok, I'll try with an educated guess...
NAPOTM: WHAT THE HELL HAVE YOU DONE? WHY IS EVERYTHING A MESS? WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST DO THE THING?
Me: I ASKED HOW TO DO THE THING AND YOU REFUSED TO TELL ME! I'M FLYING BLIND AND I DON'T KNOW WHY!
NAPOTM: BECAUSE YOU'RE JUST SUPPOSED TO EITHER MAGICALLY KNOW OR IGNORE MY REQUEST AND FORCE SOMEBODY ELSE TO DO THE THING! EVERYBODY KNOWS THAT!
ME: HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT MAKE SENSE?
NAPOTM: IT'S WHAT EVERYBODY DOES! YOU'RE A FREAK IF YOU DON'T GET THAT!
^^A quick summary of the past 30 years of my life.
#long post#I don't want to act like any one neurotype is better than another or that autism isn't a disability#because that way lies eugenics and you don't solve the problem of traditional eugenics by doing eugenics in the other direction#but people who straight up refuse to explain anything ever make life so hard and for what#''that's just the way it is'' why though? Is it the way it always has to be?#my entirely life is just that fuckin ''fold in the cheese'' scene transposed into different contexts#this is how teachers kill a student's enthusiasm for any given subject even when the student is neurotypical#disability#ramble#I am trying to be enthusiastic about learning but y'all are making it so difficult no wonder youngsters are currently in crisis
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