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whenmemorydies · 6 months ago

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Breakdown of a racist microaggression in Ice Chips 3x08

This title is misleading because any scene with Donna in it is likely going to be one gigantic macroaggression of some sort lol but I wanted to talk about this scene in Ice Chips and how subtly but impactfully it was played by all the actors in it:

Recall the beginning of 3x08 Ice Chips. Donna has just done her narcissistic thing in the parking lot of the hospital, ignoring-a-very-pregnant-and-about-to-give-birth Natalie's pleas to "shut the fuck up" and we are now in the hospital room with the two of them.

Donna is continuing to do her narcissistic thing and has begun to regale everyone in the room (which at this point is Natalie and a nurse) with stories about being a mother, asserting herself as an expert on the journey her daughter is about to embark on.

She tells Natalie and the nurse (who happens to be Black) about how badly she wanted to be a mother. She said its because:

I wanted someone to love me the way I had seen.

So yes, alarm bells. Wanting a baby so you can feel loved? Probably not the best reason to bring a whole other person into the world.

Note: Mikey entered the world with so much of Donna's expectations and trauma waiting to receive him like his first swaddle. No wonder he knew from a young age that pursuing a singular passion of his own was not going to happen for him because he had people to look after (recall his discussion with Tina in 3x06 Napkins). Parentified, eldest siblings unite /sob.

But back to Donna, Natalie, the nurse and the hospital room.

Donna then hits us with this curveball - her feelings about the exact parent/child relationships she had seen:

You know, all those smug mothers down at the Jewel, blocking the aisle with their strollers.

Yikes.

Donna is jealous of those mothers. She wants to be one of them. She wants to block the aisle at the Jewel (which a quick google tells me is probably short for Jewel-Osco - a chain of grocery stores in Chicago). She's so resentful of mothers with children, that she calls them "smug" for no other reason than they're probably not yelling at their kids in public (lol, also more yikes). She wants to be smug too. It's almost like Donna doesn't want a child, but what she thinks a child will give her: love she clearly hasn't experienced either as a child herself or as an adult . And also the power to be smug and take her place at the Jewel. Its almost like, to Donna, a child is an object, a means to an end.

But we're not done.

Then Donna says:

Do you know what Gina said to me? Gina fucking said to me - she looked down at my stomach - she says to me,

'You know, Donna, there are lots of good Chinese babies, honey.'

And then Donna turns to the only racialised person in the room, the Black nurse and says:

I mean, can you imagine?

And to her credit, that nurse did not kiss her teeth (she has so much more patience and professionalism than me lmao) but I felt her reaction to my CORE:

The biting of tongue, the looking up for divine intervention to get the person speaking to shut the fuck up, the looking down and pursing of lips when you realise no such help is coming, lmao.

I felt that reaction because I have been in this situation so many times as a racialised person (specifically as a non-Black POC). What is the situation exactly? The situation is a white person making a racist comment or "joke" in front of BIPOC folks in order to feel validated in their racism. The situation is getting BIPOC folks to collude/cosign in racism by doing it in front of them and trying to get them in on the "joke" too. This nurse was not having any of it.

For folks who are unsure about what was racist about Donna's comment: the "Chinese babies" Donna is likely referring to are the wave of Asian-American adoptions (where largely white Americans adopted children from China, South Korea, Vietnam, Cambodia and other East Asian countries) that began during the Cold War. The racism is the exporting of Donna's previously discussed objectification of a child, to the East. If she can't make a baby to fill the emotional vortex of her heart, Donna can buy adopt a "Chinese" one (the use of "Chinese" to refer to a myriad of nations and people is also racist). To be clear: white people treating BIPOC folks as objects to fill their needs and not as humans deserving of dignity and respect, is racist.

And yes, this is Donna recounting what someone named Gina has said to her. Its not technically what Donna has said so she's innocent right? Wrong. Donna is recounting a racist incident in front of a BIPOC person whom she has no relationship with. She's not condemning the racism of her friend so for all we know, she may have the same views as Gina - that Asian babies are fine to be adopted if you're a white woman who's feeling very lonely and just wants a baby really badly. This is deeply uncomfortable. My skin was crawling during this scene.

Natalie, observant woman that she is, clocks the nurse's discomfort right away:

And then Donna says:

The joke was on her. God rest her soul. I was two months gone with Michael at the time.

So we know Donna is not condemning Gina for her racism. She's condemning Gina for assuming Donna couldn't get pregnant on her own. Great. So now we and the nurse have a better sense of Donna's position here (Natalie being Donna's daughter surely already knows her mother's position).

Understandably, the nurse does not take Donna's bait and does not affirm her statements. So Donna doubles down in her condemnation of Gina, trying to get the nurse to affirm her any way, any how.

Natalie can see where this may end up going (when JLC does that upside-down-smile-grimace, even I know this is about to get messy lmao) so, being the well-practised parentified daughter that she is, she intervenes:

Then Donna reassures Natalie and the nurse that she did call Pete and she did leave a message and that everything is good. Still Donna needs affirmation from the nurse (can we talk about white folks needing BIPOC folks, in particular Black women, to affirm and hold their feelings for them? Can we talk about the demands of emotional labour?) so she tries another tactic:

The nurse can see right through Donna's posturing:

But she remains respectful and professional, politely responding: Wow.

(which wasn't as sarcastic in the scene as it might read here lol)

Natalie, like the nurse, can also see that her mother is, in fact, on one:

When the nurse does not give Donna anything more than "wow", she gets visibly pissed off. She pulls a face like "That's it?! Wow? Don't you know how hard it is to walk while being in labour?!" JLC goes FULL upside-down-smile-grimace:

But before Donna can embarrass herself further, she gets interrupted.

By a visibly Asian nurse:

And proceeds to shut the fuck up:

The way I CACKLED at the end of this scene lol.

Anyway, I was rewatching this episode for another meta but as is often the case with this show, something else revealed itself in the rewatch, so here we are.

This scene in Ice Chips is literally only one minute long. But the subtleties of facial expression, the looks thrown, the silences, the script choices were *chef's kiss* for so accurately depicting a racist microaggression and the inherent narcissism of racism itself - above and beyond any other mental health diagnoses that Donna might have. This scene was a perfect example of someone having mental health issues and also doing tone-deaf and racist shit, and how blurry those things may appear when you watch them in action.

As humans, we can have multiple things be true of ourselves at the same time. Donna can be mentally unwell and can say and do racist things. Natalie can love Sydney - an unambigiously Black woman - like a sister and also love her unambiguously offensive (lol) mother Donna. Carmy can love his largely BIPOC staff but then treat them like cogs in a machine at work.

I'm not saying that humans contain multitudes, the end. If some of those multitudes are harmful to BIPOC folks or other groups that face systemic discrimination then it is imperative that we try to change the behaviours we have that are harmful. Donna has work to do, so does Carmy and so does Nat. But I'm also saying this shit is messy and its complex. I just thought I'd point out that 3x08 Ice Chips did a great job of showcasing a bit of that mess and a bit of that complexity.

#the bear meta #the bear #the bear hulu #the bear fx #donna berzatto #natalie berzatto #microaggressions #sydcarmy #sydney adamu #carmen berzatto

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fernandomagicalonsomanydances · 2 months ago

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Been largely absent from Tumblr since I had to reset my phone but in preparation for the last race of the season here's my updated rating of the drivers based on how much I love and support them

1. Carlos - you are the reason I got into the sport Smooth Operator and "I ain't quitting you" even if you did decide to go to the cellar that is Williams

2. Fernando - with the Newey news hope is restored for my favorite old man to get his much deserved and long overdue 3 WDC "help me Adrian Newey you're my only hope"

3. Oscar - well with Logan and Danny gone and Checo leaving looks like you're getting adopted yet again Osco by me the American congratulations you can now claim 3 more races as "home races" because I'm claiming you as my home driver cause it sure ain't gonna be Canadian Nepo Baby

4. Esteban - oh Estie Bestie they didn't even let you say goodbye. Screw that shit show that is Alpine. Can't wait to see you take Haas to the next level with lovely Ollie Bear beside you (please don't hurt him or I will end you)

5. Max - my trauma bro for life who healed my inner child when he let his little sister Victoria put the sticker on the Redbull cooler at Qatar. You are the champion of the world and of the horror story that is your past

6. Lando - "a gentleman on and off the track" as your bro4lyfe Carlos said. I will never say anything bad about you again after how gallantly you treated Oscar. The goodest boy.

7. Franco - chaos powered by maté please don't go away. We need the heir of Sebastian's rizzardry and Senna's face to stick around

8. Charles - you can be a princess sometimes but you're my best friend's favorite princess just maybe don't act like someone pissed on your cheerios every time Carlos does better than you and please toughen up and lighten up because i don't know if I'm prepared to see BOTH Ferrari pilots be sad wet mops next year

9. Pierre - I used to think you were an arrogant little Frenchman who came off as vain but after burying the hatchet with Esteban at Brazil and then qualifying like a GOAT ever since I'm prepared to look past the past and actually like you now

10. Valterri - oh you cheeky cheeky Finn with your cheeks out everywhere, the grid won't be the same without you and if you want me to help you lock Helmut Marko in a shed so you can get that Redbull seat I'd only be too happy to help

11. Alex - sweet zookeeper I'm sorry your car is held together by scotch tape and prayers these days

12. Nico - the Just For Men hair care model that you are never change Nico... Except hopefully Audi can change the number of podiums you have

13. Yuki - feisty parkour king you deserve the seat alongside Max more than anyone else in the RB family currently and I will help you beat up Helmut Marko if that's what it takes

14. Checo - please go spend time with your family. You were great but you gotta go it's getting embarrassing leave before there's no dignity left to leave with and your successes get lost for the sour ending

15. Kevin - please use your last race in F1 to absolutely embrace the Danish Demolition Derby that you are and clear a path for Hulk's first podium and then enjoy your adorable lovely family and whatever sports you move on to next

16. Zhou - thanks for saving Sauber from the total ignominy of a big ole goose egg at the end of the year. I hope you come back cause you're such an inspiration to your country

17. George - once upon a time you were in my top 3 and then you decided chicanery was the way to take down Max. If you don't believe you can beat him on the track then admit it don't go plotting his downfall by getting him hit with penalty points for basically a non-event. I loved you but now you're just some whiny bitch I used to know

18. Lewis - you literally would have had a chance to surpass George if you too weren't being a whiny bitch Lewis. Threatening to not race the last 3! Whining before Brazil! Wanting to quit in Qatar! Are you or are you not a 7 time world champion? Freaking act like it. Regardless of whatever Toto may say you owe it to the team that brought you most of your championships to at least try. Think of Bono if you can't think of anyone else to show your appreciation by sucking it up a little bit bro

19. Lance - you are basically useless but at least your daddy's money will get my Daddy a better car since he brought Newey in with his dough

20. Liam - I was prepared to forgive you for replacing my beloved Danny Ric and then you went and acted like the biggest prick on the grid and decided it was on sight with any pilot who spoke Spanish or their teammates now at this rate. Your love for Cars cannot redeem your attitude which smells like Durian fruit.

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minerscanarybyvanessacarlton · 6 months ago

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My favorite genre of tweet is someone whining about food prices and the price is what doordash or instacart are charging them.

Just for fun I put together roughly what my weekly grocery order would be in both the Jewel Osco app and in Instacart (I did not adjust the tip I would always tip $10 at least for instacart).

The difference between these two is a 5 minute drive (there's a Jewel even closer but I like this one better). I don't even have to go in the store I just let them know I'm there in that same app and what spot I'm in. That's not exactly a whole lot of extra steps. The difference in price between the two is forty dollars. Now, obviously the shopper/driver isn't getting all of that $40 and I'm willing to have that discussion but like, yes. Optional conveniences cost money. If you want someone to do your shopping for you, you have to pay them. They're not your mother and you're not a child.

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addictwoapen · 2 years ago

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then vs. now

there are two versions of my father that exist.

“you can do anything you set your mind to” dad. And “not all men” dad.

as a child I was told it doesn’t matter what other people think or feel, I can do what I want. I can be an athlete, I can be smart, I can do whatever I want and fuck everyone that says otherwise. And while the sentiment was there, two things could not be true, or it didn’t feel like it could be anyway.

When I was a kid, I loved sports. I still do. I love playing sports and learning mechanics, and I have since forever. I was the boy my father never had with two older brothers who never quite learned how to throw a ball correctly. I remember being told I had a good arm in first grade, and how I was faster than the other boys at recess. I remember, even though it’s blurry now, thinking I could not be both a tom boy or a girly girl. How I had to choose if I wanted to wear pink or be good at sports. Even at the age of six I was aware that boys thought girls sucked simply because of my double X’s. I was aware that “boys rule” meant more than a harmless us vs. them type of pride.

So I chose. I decided girly girls were dumb and insipid. I chose to be athletic and school-smart. I was praised and held to high standards. No Cs or you’re grounded, no tennis lessons unless I went to the gym. Because all that could be demanded of me was excellence. As a kid, I thought this was just strictness of my parents beliefs about education and hard work. As an adult, I’ve come to realize it stems from mom and dad’s insecurities. We are at the mercy of grandparents even when they’ve been gone for years.

I hated the color pink from second grade on, and I still do to this day. I hated being called Barbie since I was the stereotypical blonde-haired-blue-eyed white girl. I hated that all I was allowed to be was pink. It felt like no matter which side I looked at, I was stuck in a box. I couldn’t be angry because it wasn’t ladylike, I received much more punishment for swearing as a teenager than my older brother did. It wasn’t until I was 20 in a Jewel Osco during Covid that I told my father to grow up and get over it. I was an adult and I would make my own decisions about the way that I spoke and behaved.

It wasn’t until I was a bit older that I realized that girls and women had the capacity for so much more, but suffered with self-actualization and introspection much earlier than our male friends.

When explaining the waves of feminism to my dad on a bike ride in 2021, he said “I don’t know anything about this waves of feminism shit” and I replied “must be nice”. He didn’t get it.

The first version of my dad loved his daughter fiercely. I was daddy’s little girl who was a little spoiled but wasn’t a brat. We played catch together. We played HORSE together in the driveway where he spray painted basketball court lines for me on the ground to practice my free-throws in sixth grade. We went to the tennis courts to practice my serves in seventh grade. We traveled to Texas in college to watch me play at Nationals. He said I could do anything I put my mind to.

It wasn’t until I was an adult that he said “well...”.

And there it was.

The stipulation that he knew that the world would treat me different and that while it may be unfair-I had to adjust, and it shouldn’t be the other way around. When I talk of creepy men in the gym I had just started attending, it was “yeah but I don’t do that,” when I talk of 60+ year old men hitting on me and asking me out to drinks when I was 19 it was “that’s not that weird,”. It’s invalidation at it’s finest, and understanding that he will truly never get it.

I often think of a memory. I was in elementary school. My dad and I often used to go on hikes together on the weekend in the forest preserves of the suburbs of Chicago. I couldn’t pinpoint my age but I wasn’t fully self-aware yet, so it was pre-fifth grade. He would say “no matter what anyone tells you, you can do anything you want, and it doesn’t matter that you’re a girl”. This was in reference to a woman we passed who was hiking on her own, and even at a young age, I was aware of the danger she could be in on a 5am hike in the middle of a forest with no houses for miles. I remember thinking as a young girl “why would I risk getting hurt?”. It was a memory I would come back to often throughout childhood, as I reminder that I could do anything. But as I approached adulthood, I sometimes revel in my father’s naivety.

There are always stipulations.

As an adult, my dad still thinks I can do what I want, but if I have to work harder to fight prejudice because I am a woman, than that is what I must do. I shouldn’t cry about the injustice I have and inevitably will again face. I should suck it up and power through it. Because as a middle-age white man with a steady job, he has never faced discrimination or prejudice for things he can’t change about himself.

The latter version of my father makes no excuses for his behavior. He says “if you don’t like it, I don’t care”. Despite his secretly hidden desire to be seen, to be heard. He says he doesn’t care what others think, but I think he cares too much sometimes. We are the same in that regard, and it is terrifying. His lack of empathy towards others of different experiences is astounding when he raised a daughter that has an excess of it. His anger is often misplaced and rooted in toxic masculinity and the idea of a traditional family despite a certain lack of religious or traditional upbringing.

There are two versions of my father that exist.

Naïve and Jaded.

#barbie #feminism #femalerage

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noctilu-uca · 25 days ago

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UGGHHHH STORY TIME

its my moms birthday today !!!!!!!! :3 and my dad had nothing planned whatsoever. Nothing. No present. No cake.

My mom was aware of this, as this happens every year. And thus informed me of her woes, all she wanted was a small cake for herself atleast.

So.

Me. My brother. And his girlfriend. Took it up to ourselves to try and make my mom happy on her birthday.

Plan 1: cake.

Plan 2: presents.

Plan 3: SURPRISE HER !!

Start of plan 1 - order the cake, if not, get the ingredients to make the cake, and then assemble.

I talk to my dad in the morning about dinner, and tell him we were getting a cake.

"We?" said in great shock as if he would have to plan and pay for this

"Me, [girl], and [brother]."

"Oh, ok. Then i wont worry about it."

Said as if he were worrying about it in the first place.

So plan 1 starts.

My mom was very specific on her favourite cake, very simply, she wanted a Vanilla Bean Cake with Whipped Cream Frosting and Whole peaches inside.

Simple, right?

WRONG.

my dear fellows when i tell you my poor brothers girlfriend was having trouble. SHE WAS HAVING TROUBLE. the poor bakery at the local jewel osco where she works didnt know what she was talking about. So i got a text saying "they dont have vanilla bean cake."

"Vanilla should be just fine"

"They dont have whole peaches, only peach filling."

"...i'll just make it myself."

And so i made it myself.

The girl brought home ingredients and already something was amiss, no heavy cream for the whipped cream frosting. Only jarred pillsbury whipped frosting. And so we run into our first issue.

Getting heavy whipping cream.

Girl doesnt have her license for she had gotten it revoked after roo many tickets, i just dont have mine yet bc dmvs are assholes with dates and at this point its been a good few years since i should have gotten it.

Car issues aside, point is, we cant exactly go out and drive to get some if we wanna do this legally. And preferably we want it legal.

Girl said she would door dash it, cool ! Doordash wanted $40. Nuh uh. And every other delivery service would take 2 hours despite the shops not being 10 minutes away by car.

So we call my good friend:

"Hi are you busy?"

"Yeah kinda i just woke up"

It was 3 pm.

"Ok... Well i need heavy whipping cream do you have any?"

"No, and i have no car right now."

FUCK.

So i call good friend no.2:

"Hey, i need you to do something for me"

"Ok what is it?"

"Can you bring over or pick up some heavy whipping cream?"

"Sorry but im like an hour away at work"

FUCK X2.

So me and girl stare at each other and decide, corner store. The corner store that is a 25 minute walk away *might* have some. But its mid winter, its freezing. We dont wanna walk. But girl can bike !!! So we go into the garage and-!

All of the bikes are hung up on the ceiling over a parked stick car.

We werent getting those any time soon.

So we debate for a few minutes, pondering what to do. Then i remember,

Oooh i remember.

My one neighbor who really likes us and wants to help us whenever they can.

So i call...

"Hey, its me [luca], can i ask you for something?"

"Yeah sure what is it?"

"Well im making this cake for my mom but i need heavy whipping cream to make the frosting she really likes. Do you have any?"

"Umm yeah how much do you need?"

Holy shit.

"2 cups, thats all we need."

"Hm... Hold on."

Holy shit...

"Yeah i have it, i'll have [child] bring it over."

HOLY SHIT !!!!!!!!!

AND SO WE PROCURE THE HEAVY WHIPPING CREAM !!!!

And so we bake the cake, let it cool, and start assembling.

Cake. Done.

Onto plan 2.

moms birthday today and boy do i have a story please wait

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juice-squid · 5 years ago

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@f4everf4ever and i decided to create sum kiddos for Elias and Coral while also doing an art trade with them with both their parents >v<

Meet Avery! She loves bright fashion that people may find weird. She also acts very cute and bubbly but when u get on her bad side, she gets very scary.

#star vs the forces of evil #svtfoe #svtfoe child #kelpbottom child #osco child #avery greason diaz #elias greason diaz #digital art #squid draws

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docholligay · 3 years ago

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Ghosts I’ve Met: Robin

There was nothing special about the house. Beige carpet that rambled from one room to the next, room laid out in perfect little rectangles next to a nondescript bathroom with vinyl tile in white and blue. The walls were all a pale eggshell where we hung our photos, photos of a family not much different from the house itself: A husband, a wife, a daughter, pregnant with another child. Young and fresh faced.

If you’re concerned, don’t be. This is a real story, and in real stories, blood doesn’t leak from the walls and no one gets murdered, there is only the vague sense that something might be just a touch off. That reality might be slightly warped, here. And for most people, that’s enough.

I was two years old then, my hair still so blonde that from a distance it scarcely looked like I had any, toddling into that uninteresting house where we were going to live. My father managed an Osco, back when they existed, working his way up from stockboy--no one in my family ever had any education--and we were moved here for another store that needed a manager.

My sister was due in a month or two. I was a highly verbal but otherwise unexceptional child, who enjoyed playing by myself with cans from the pantry or my colorful wooden blocks. I was flipping through books already, knowing my letters and individual words, on the edge of being able to stumble my way through a book. My mother had no idea what children were like, and so in every case she simply assumed that I was, well, what all children were like.

And so she thought nothing of it when she passed by the door to my bedroom and heard me merrily chatting with someone. She stopped by the door and listened. I was so chatty in the day to day that it seemed the most natural thing in the world to her that given no audience, I would simply talk to the wall itself.

I was playing, that was all. Offering blocks for an imaginary fired to play with, asking rambling toddler questions about what we were building. She moved away from the door.

Why wouldn’t she?

It wasn’t until a few days later, when I was sitting at the table eating my lunch of apples and cheese, that she thought anything of it. She came to sit with me, as she usually did in the afternoons.

“You’re sitting on Robin!” I squealed dramatically.

My mother laughed and offered to move, asking me where she could sit. I continued to talk happily between the two of them, seeming not to hardly realize that they didn’t have much to say to each other.

I had an imaginary friend. It was very cute, she thought.

It wasn’t until much later that my mother began to look at things with a curious eye. Robin was not a tall monster with purple eyes, or a fairy, or a princess. He was a little boy, that was all. Other mothers looked at her oddly when she said I never blamed Robin for a broken glass or a purloined cookie. My sins were my own. Robin never came to the grocery store, a favorite place of mine even then, and when we traveled to visit family, he was only ever waiting at home when we arrived. He had shown up when we moved into the house, but that’s what kids do, right? Things were changing, I now had a sister, it was a new house.

But I was just so….young.

Years later, talking in my psychology class, I called my mother afterwards. How old was I when I hung around with Robin? What was he like? Was he naughty? All the answers made him less and less imaginary, further and further off the path of the other children.

“Why do you ask?” She said.

“I was too young to have an imaginary friend. It was..” I scrambled for the words, “developmentally inappropriate.”

There was silence on the other end of the line. And then, a near whisper, as if it all came flooding back to her.

“Robin always seemed sad. You said he missed his Mommy. When I asked you where she was you just said, away.”

You read these sorts of things in books, but you never expect them to happen to you. Who could imagine themselves as the creepy child in a horror movie? The hair on the back of my neck stood up, unnerved by a version of myself I no longer knew.

“But when we moved to Far--”

“He didn’t come to Fargo. I thought it was so weird, you didn’t want to move, but Robin never came to Fargo. He stayed there.”

I wonder if he’s still there. Waiting for his mother.

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poetrypuree · 3 years ago

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i love thinking that sharing a drink is like the most subtle yet foundational block of intimacy, like when i was a little, i learned that sharing a drink with a family member was ok but the risks were higher in terms of transferring germs to share with non-relatives... which I'm laughing at as I write this, at the things I've managed to believe but also I love the transgression or maybe inclination to anything slightly chaotic that I embodied as a child, and still. I've always felt it was a sign of trust to both be offered and to offer a friend a sip from my straw, from my water bottle, use my chapstick on their lips. I started thinking about this after I watched my cat drink water from my glass as his water sits well within reach of us, and at that moment I know that this is intentional bonding lol to consume what someone you love has also consumed, to not shy from their germs but to say "even as bacteria- we are friends". As a teen, I think that's when some of my symptoms of OCD began to be felt and these interactions were still filled with a savory lovingness but also thoughts following like "their saliva is on my straw and I'm hesitant on drinking my drink now, but I want to but I don't?" and this process happens cyclically until i am not moving for what i assume is too long so I typically drink because it adheres to this nice imagery i have of a bunch of my bacterias like also sharing their equivalent to a rose milk tea boba. I think with the pandemic, I try to be a bit wiser about my approach to these ideas on what it means to share which i kind of feel is translating to a larger aspect of my personality that's a current shift. I feel like I'm adopting slowly into a more private person, maybe writing and sharing this negates that statement lol but I don't think so. I'm starting to value more what actually stays private and knowing that my sips are sacred, but I can give waterfalls freely, you can have some of my water if you're thirsty but please don't put your mouth on the lid. I feel like there's often this ugly feeling for saying too much on the internet or really like saying anything for too long at all like it seems fake, performative, contrived, self obsorbed? or maybe thats just how i view myself but im still yadda yadda-ing. I don't think there's rarely ever been a time I wasn't performing a way to be and if I truly wasn't i don't know if I'd know the difference quite honest or if there even is one but i do enjoy the simple offering of like hmm this is a make-shift of who i am/who i expect me to be/who you expect me to be/who they expected me to be/all the neurotics behind all of that, which feels like a jewel-osco bakery treat sitting self consciously wondering if anyone knows they're not homemade. My mom loves their peach muffins and thus so do I, when I think about it, a lot of my family favorites come pre-packaged like pecan sandies, cheese danishes also from jewel I don't know what I'm saying anymore but I guess I'm just making up a remedy for the feeling of feeling undesirable. Sometimes I feel like I'm on this quest to figure out who I am at my most uncorrupted but I'm finding that it never happened because I never have to ask myself for or show up with proof of being homemade.

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suckitsurveys · 4 years ago

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What’s your favourite type of bird? Cardinals or Blue Jays. How many friends do you have on Facebook? 200-something. What was on the last sandwich you ate? Turkey breast, provolone cheese, mayo, lettuce and tomato. What sort of music did you listen to when you were in high school? A variety of music. Do you prefer gold or silver jewellery? I like both.

Have you ever gotten back together with an ex? Yeah, gross. How far away is the closest store to your house and what is it? There’s a small deli/grocery store down the block. What is your favourite Thai dish? Pad See Ew or Massaman curry. How many contacts do you have in your phone? 109 apparently. When was the last time you made out with somebody? The other night. What month of the year was your mother born? January. Do you have any friends that seem to know all the hot gossip? Sure. Are there any candles in your bedroom, and what scent are they? I think so, but I can’t remember off the top of my head. I may have moved them recently. What tv show(s) have you been watching currently? Ughhh there’s SO many I need to watch. When was the last time you went to a birthday party? I threw my niece one a month ago. How many apps do you have on your phone? A lot. What pet names do you use with your significant other? Babe/baby, hun, and some other personal ones that would need explaining lol. Do you have to wear a name badge where you work? We’re supposed to wear our IDs on us but no one ever does lol. Do you have a dress code or have to wear a uniform where you work? A small dress code. Basically I have to dress like I’m going to be doing labor (Jeans, steel toe shoes, tshirt). What brand is your toaster, if you have one? I don’t know what brand it is. Have you ever dated a smoker? Yes. Are there any movies you’ve seen so many times? Yeah, there’s several movies I’ve seen many times. What was the last thing you purchased with cash? My nails. Can you hear anything right now? The AC. I just realized I am still wearing my headphones even though nothing is playing lol. Is there anybody else in the room you’re currently in? Kitties. What’s the name of the store you usually get your groceries? Jewel-Osco. Would you rather travel to Japan or Scotland? Japan. Does your house have a porch/balcony? No, but we have a really nice patio/garden. What’s your usual order when you go to a coffee shop? I order different things depending on my mood/the season. So either a hot/iced matcha latte with soy/coconut milk if they have it, an iced hazelnut latte, an iced tea, or some holiday themed drink. Have you ever seen a theatre show? Yeah. What was the last movie you saw and who did you watch it with? I watched Pokemon: The First Movie with my niece and cousin a few weeks ago. What is your mother’s first name? Janet. Do you like to dance? Sure.

What’s your favourite type of bread? Garlic. Do you receive catalogues and brochures in your mailbox? Yeah. What colour is the sky right now? Grey. Do you share a middle name with any of your siblings? Nope. Have there ever been any bushfires/wildfires in your area? Nope. How would you label your sexual orientation? I wouldn’t, because I have no idea. When was the last time you took a nap during the day? It’s been a while. I don’t like naps. What did you have to eat for dinner last night? Pizza and fired zucchini. Have you ever been a member in a band? No. Are you double-jointed? No. What was the last thing you had to drink? Iced coffee. Do you currently have any bruises on your body? I do. Who was the last message you received from and what did they say? Mark sent me a meme. Okay WEIRD right as I was typing this I got a spam text message from Pizza Hut, lol. What colour are your eyes? Green. Can you cry on command? If so, have you ever used it to your advantage? Sure. Do you consider your goals easily achievable or are they pretty grand? Blah. What’s your favourite kind of accent? Boston and southern. What time does the sun go down where you live at this time of the year? About 8:30/9. Do you prefer beer, wine or spirits? Wine. When was the last time you ate Mexican food? A couple weeks ago. Have you ever watched yourself on video? Yeah. What time did you wake up today? A little after 7 oops. What time will you go to sleep tonight? Hopefully early. Do you have separate emails for personal and business? Yes. Are you the eldest, youngest or a middle child? I’m the baby. What’s your favourite vegetable? Zucchini. What colours are you wearing today? Right now I am just wearing a tye dye shirt and purple underwear. Do you have a subscription to any streaming services like Netflix? Yes. Would you rather eat Italian or Indian food? Both have dishes I like. Are you sitting, standing or lying down right now? Half laying, half sitting. Have you ever missed a flight? No. Are you someone who always needs a coffee before you can function? Nah. Do your neighbours have any pets? Have you ever met them? Yes. Our first floor neighbors have a kitty named Guts who we haven’t officially met but have see through the window. And our second floor neighbor has a beagle named Max who we have met and pet lol. When was the last time you washed your hair? Yesterday. What colour is your bedroom door? Black. Have you ever seen a lunar eclipse? Yes. Do you know your significant other’s passwords? I think so? I’ve never had a reason to used them so I don’t know if I remember them. What was the last thing you said aloud? ”Hi kitty baby” to Ramona. Do you know anyone who writes huge essays when they message you? Yes, my cousin does. And sometimes others if they are telling a story or something.

#surveys

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kathyorihara · 6 years ago

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Pupusas

(Don't laugh)

They are basically stuffed tortillas in a way which is the only way to explain them. If someone says they are tortas (mexican ones) one more time I'm gonna scream.

Supper easy to make even a child can do it (just make sure the adult is cooking them)

First step:

Go to your local grocery store (if it's like an american establishment like jewl-osco and not like what's called a "mercado" I think. Go into the hispanic (I think that's what it's labeled) section). Get your self some rice flour you can also make corn flour ones but personally rice flour ones are better.

(^ this type of flour)

Get some filling as well like:

Cheese

Beans

Chicharon (it's pork)

Shrimp

Squash

All there are litterally no limits but there should be.

Second step:

If you are making a small serving of like 2 people get one packet if you're six like us get two trust me you can make a lot with just two they are just small packets. Get a big bowl, salt and water.Add a pinch of salt. I think about 2 or 3 cups of water just not too liquidy add more flour or water if necessary. Mix it together with your hands if you don't like getting things under your nails wear gloves. Make sure hands or gloves are wet while mixing the dought is very sticky. My mom uses either oil or water on her hands.

Third step:

You have made dough, grab some enough to make it into a small/medium ball then flatten it and add your filling and close it up again. Or flatten it and add filling and close it up either way make it flat like a pancake with no filling showing at the end.

Fourth step:

Get out a sauce pan and place them on there for 2-3 mins. They should have golden brown spots. That's it you're done. I recomend some salsa as well cuz they can be pretty dry on their own.

Blend some tomatoes the pour into a pot like small one:

The add a oinch of salt and lwt it simmer for 5 mins then you're done. This video below explains it a bit better:

https://youtu.be/0DyB9ZtOVn0

(Just don't agree with her about leaving open places.)

#pupusas #how to make it

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mmmmmmygodstopfuckinlying · 7 years ago

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It hurts mister Sanada.

Ming Hua Dai Lee-Sanada escaped the Fuck.House one spring morning. He was headed to Da Jewel Osco for pampers. Pampers for his soon to be born child. Yes, dear readers, that's right, this is an Mpreg ficcie. Don't like don't read! He also was looking for Sudafed and coolant so he could make meth. His OBGYN had warned him that smoking meth and weed, shooting up heroin and smoking 2 packs a day could possibly harm the baby. Constantly being hit from the back like a mangy dog not help either.

After being scared of the animtronic tree at Da Jewel, he bought Mister Sanada his expensive beer and party peanuts and headed home, listening to the new Tool album. He sighed in relief. Sanadas car was not in the driveway. He didn't have to worry about being yelled at because he wasn't washing dishes fast enough. It was hard doing chores as an MPREG.

But his luck ran out. It turned out Sanada's 100,000 Corvette was actually in the shop being repaired. Actually there was evidence of a crime against a child and it was being cleaned like in Pulp Fiction. But in young Ming Huas eyes the emissions were being tested.

Sanada walked to the kitchen, his shirt covered in blood. He had a nose bleed and his pupils were so tiny, not that it mattered because his eyes were always soulless and black. He harshly grabbed the beer away from his jailbait husband. "Drop on your knees and give me fifty" he screamed. He shotgunned all the bears, spilling some on the carpet.

MingHua slapped Sanada in the face. He watched The Shining and felt empowered when Wendy fought back. Sanada was so shocked. Surorisngly he walked away to his study, muttering to himself.

Later that day after MingHua watched his Tony hawk VHS tape for the 60th time. He was high on 4 Advil and there was no stopping him.

Sanada came up behind him and threw a glass of cold water on him. "Oh you will regret what you did. You will regret it in full" he walked away after making remarks about how fat his ugly MPREG husband looked.

Suddenly the baby kicked...hard. Ming Hua remembered that his mom said when he was in her belly she tried to abort him, and the damage was the reason he was gay and that's why Jesus hated him. He wondered if Sanada would hurt the baby...

FLASHBACK SUMMER 2002

xXSanada PovXx

"Theres just no pleasing you is there..." I said to my sexy, easily manipulated but retarded Chink husband. He was getting too old for me by the second. He asked me if I would give him a hug before I left for work and I said no and he started crying. The Mpregancy was starting to make him unbearable.

Later that day I got a call from him. I ignored it until he wouldn't stop. It was about the baby...we were having...a GIRL.

That does it! I thought. Here I thought I may have not just a new lover but someone to pass along my teachings. Someone with his mother's good looks and his dad's intelligence. Hopefully his dad's skin color too.

That baby is going to die. She will be aborted AT ONCE.

_at.home_

I got home from work and went up to my bedroom. My dumb inbred husband was sleeping in the dark and he looked like he smoked weed all day even though it was just 2pm. That was all he ever did anymore. I pulled the blanket off him.

I realized in a moment....maybe it was meant to be...there could be a Miss Sanada one day.

He woke up and froze in fear. Of course I didn't waste this chance because he was wearing shorts and my Pops taught me that's all you need for consent.

--7months later__

The water broke. MimgHua was at his brother Jackies house.

"Asuh bruh. Looks like your water broke". Jackie passed him the blunt. "A fat hit of weed smoke will calm her down"

"No Jackie I need to go to the hospital take me NOW!"

-at the hospital-

Sanada was nowhere to be found. He was "at work". The baby was born. The nurses SCREAMed.

This was the baby.

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fuck-scrappydoo · 7 years ago

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I really like Dannon Fruit on the Bottom yogurt, I had it for breakfast almost every day when I was a kid and my favorite flavor is cherry. Now at our local Jewel Osco they had plenty in stock for years but one day when I was a child, all they had in stock was Plain and Coffee flavor. I was devasted. Where was my yogurt? This was also during the Greek yogurt craze, so the places where My believed Cherry Fruit on the Bottom yogurt was awaiting me every time I went to the grocery store, was Chobani, mocking me. I was a sad, yogurtless child. Every time we checked the dairy aisle we were always met with dissapointment. And now I know why this happened. It was Scrappy Doo. He knew that I loved Dannon Cherry FotB yogurt so he called up my Jewel and told them to stop stocking them, and with his powers of manipulation he persuaded them to do so. I was without this yogurt for years thanks to him.

I know have acsess to this yogurt, and the Jewel in my town has since restocked the flavor, and every time I eat it I smile knowing that I have thwarted Scrappy's evil plans once again.

#scrappy doo #scooby doo

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easyfoodnetwork · 5 years ago

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Idaho Finds That Going to Bars, Not Going to Protests, Is Causing COVID-19 Spikes

Photo: Kzenon/Shutterstock

Plus, high levels of arsenic were found in Whole Foods bottled water brand, and more news to start your day

Crowded bars contribute more to coronavirus spread than protests and vigils do

Demonstrations and bar visits — in Ada County, Idaho, two kinds of outings that illustrate how drastically different SARS-CoV-2 transmission can look in contrasting environments across the United States.

There was no spike of COVID-19 cases associated with a June 2 vigil of 5,000 people, who gathered in front of the Idaho Capitol in honor of black Americans killed by police or vigilante violence, the Idaho Press reported last week. The vigil took place outside, the majority of attendees wore face masks, and few people spoke outside of preselected speakers. All of these factors can contribute to lower transmission of viral droplets. Protests in which people shout may pose higher risk of transmission, but attendees of those demonstrations also tend to wear masks.

Contrast that with the conditions at crowded bars: speaking and drinking in close quarters, fewer masks, and inhibitions lowered by alcohol can all create a more effective path for virus transmission. In Ada County, a cluster of 69 coronavirus cases was linked to people who visited bars mostly located in downtown Boise, according to the Idaho Press.

Idaho’s Central District Health announced on Monday that Boise and the larger Ada County, which moved to the final stage of reopening on June 13, will be reverting to the previous stage of reopening, following a spike in coronavirus cases. As part of that return to the previous stage, bars and nightclubs will be closed.

And in other news…

A Baltimore restaurant group has apologized to a Black woman and her 9-year-old son for unequally enforcing a dress code, refusing to seat the son because of his clothes while allowing a similarly dressed white child to be served with his family. [Washington Post]

Bagged salads sold at Aldi, Hy-Vee, and Jewel-Osco stores are potentially linked to a multistate outbreak of Cyclospora infections. [Detroit Free Press]

A test of bottled water brands found that Starkey Spring Water, a bottled water made by Whole Foods, has arsenic levels that are nearly three times the level of other brands tested. [Consumer Reports]

Reopening a restaurant equipped with all the necessary protective and safety investments comes with a high price tag. [NRN]

Starbucks has added a plant-based breakfast sandwich made with Impossible sausage to its menu. “I think people are increasingly aware plant-based products are going to completely replace the animal-based products in the food world within the next 15 years,” CEO Pat Brown told CNBC following the partnership launch. [CNBC]

The big question: As states reopen, where can people safely and reliably pee with many restaurants and other toilet-having businesses out of commission? [Vice]

Well I guess that’s one way to try to prevent viral droplet transmission between dining parties:

dude fucking stop lmfaooooooooooooooo CHICAGO IS REALLY WILD pic.twitter.com/7ubHayyDyR

— ACAB 4 EVER (@joleydubs) June 21, 2020

• All AM Intel Coverage [E]

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