#origins smp oneshot

[c-swirlz]

When I’m Graced by Your Presence (I Couldn’t Care)

Summary: Ranboo’s arrival on the SMP catches the attention of a mischievous Avian, who promptly drags him into a life of crime, pranks, and various other shenanigans.

Or: Five times Ranboo is ‘unwillingly’ dragged into Tommy’s mischief, and one time he embraces the chaos. Characters: Tommy, Ranboo, Phil, Techno, Wilbur, Jack Manifold, Sneeg, Tubbo Relationships: O!Alliumduo Warnings: None Notes: This fic was written for Fire on Ice (who’s AO3 can be found here) as part of The Writer’s Block Secret Santa! Credit for the title goes to AlexTwisted; their AO3 can be found here. [AO3 link]

In Ranboo’s humble opinion, based on what he’s seen, the stories he’s been told about the Overworld do very little justice to the realm and its unique beauty. The lush greens and soft blues are a stark yet welcome contrast to the deep purples of his home realm, and many things he finds are completely new discoveries, having never been allowed to venture beyond the End.

Then, of course, there’s the rain. The bane of any Enderian’s existence, as it’s basically their worst enemy falling from the sky. It doesn’t exist in the End, but there are many horror stories surrounding its deadly nature towards those who are not accustomed to it. Ranboo is grateful he doesn’t have to deal with it to the extent he would if he were out alone in the wild, and that’s thanks to one man: Philza Minecraft, who found him and brought him along to the SMP; a place where Origins live together without issue – for the most part.

The SMP is a big place. So, Phil proposes a tour.

“That floating island in the middle is the Pube,” Phil explains as he and Ranboo walk up to the edge of a large crater, a waterfall in the centre leading up to a building sat atop a floating rock of some sort. “The name was Wil’s idea. Tommy wasn’t too happy with it at first, but he warmed up to it pretty fast.”

Ranboo’s brow furrows, and his head tilts slightly to the side, like a wolf in the presence of a bone. Noticing his confusion, Phil smiles, chuckling quietly.

“Sorry— Wilbur and Tommy are my kids. Phantom and Avian. They’re little shits, just as a warning, but I’m sure you could just teleport away if they annoy you or something.”

“Uh huh.” Ranboo nods slowly, not really paying attention as his gaze drifts over to a nearby bush, which is rustling an awful lot despite there not being much wind. Then, a mop of dirty blond hair pops out, followed by a pair of piercing blue eyes staring into Ranboo’s soul. Goosebumps begin to prickle all over Ranboo’s skin, and he quickly glances away, taking in a steady, soothing breath before looking back over, pointedly directing his gaze off just slightly to the side.

The boy glances down at something Ranboo cannot see, and a moment later, his communicator buzzes.

TommyInnit whispers to you: You’re new

Ranboo blinks. Tommy. This must be one of the kids Phil mentioned, unless there’s somehow multiple people with the name Tommy running around. However, judging by the few feathers he can see through the leaves, he’s confident that this is indeed Phil’s child. Well, one of them, at least.

You whisper to TommyInnit: Yep. Name’s Ranboo

TommyInnit whispers to you: yes ik I can see your name on the comm dipshit

Ranboo huffs amusedly. If these messages are anything to go by, this kid has one hell of a sharp tongue, and he can’t quite determine whether that’s good or bad.

TommyInnit whispers to you: Anyway come over here will you??? And don’t let phil see you

Ranboo sighs quietly, pocketing his communicator and turning back to Phil, who is now looking at him expectantly.

“Uh…” Ranboo’s ears press against the sides of his head, and he glances far off to one side. “Could we, um… pick this back up a little later? If that’s okay? I… just remembered I have something I need to do, a-and it’s really urgent.”

For some reason, Ranboo has this nagging feeling that suggests he doesn’t expect Phil to believe him. But he does. Rather than express scepticism regarding his sudden departure, he instead smiles, assuring Ranboo that he can contact him whenever he wants to resume the tour. He waits for Phil to turn and begin walking away before he teleports over to the bush, appearing right beside Tommy, who leaps out of the foliage with a shriek. His wings puff out, and his eyes grow to the size of saucers. Ranboo isn’t entirely sure what the expression means, but he feels it’s appropriate, as Tommy’s eyes are indeed very wide.

“Fuck, I forgot you guys can do that,” Tommy mutters, exhaling sharply. “Why the hell do Enderians get all the cool abilities—”

Ranboo crosses his arms, and his ears twitch. It takes several seconds, but Tommy eventually notices and clears his throat awkwardly before planting his hands on his hips, jutting out his chin. In response to this, Ranboo simply raises an eyebrow, but Tommy doesn’t waver.

“Anyway, you, my newcomer friend—”

“We aren’t friends—”

“—seem like the perfect person to help me with some of my devious plans.”

Ranboo’s brow furrows. “And by ‘devious plans’, you’re referring to…?”

Tommy throws his hands up into the air, holding his head high. “Pranks, of course!”

There’s a beat of silence, and Ranboo swears he hears the faint sound of crickets chirping somewhere off in the distance. After a moment, Tommy drops his arms and they flop down to his sides, while his head lowers to an acceptable angle. Evidently taken aback by Ranboo’s lack of a response, he steps forward, clasping his hands together in front of him.

“Sooo, you’re gonna help me, right?”

Ranboo rolls his eyes, though he’s somewhat relieved this kid doesn’t seem to want to murder anyone, and instead just wants to play harmless jokes. Murderous tendencies are very common in the End, though he personally has never seen the appeal of killing others simply for your own amusement.

“Absolutely not.”

Tommy’s expectant expression almost immediately shifts into one of confusion and very subtle anger. “Ay?!”

“We literally just met,” Ranboo explains, as if that’s not already painfully obvious. “I haven’t even been properly shown around yet, and yet there’s this tiny chicken wanting me to be his partner in crime.”

Much like a fish, Tommy’s mouth opens and closes several times without a single sound escaping. His hands fall back down to his sides again, curling up into fists which tightly grasp handfuls of his shirt.

“Right, first off, fuck you.” Ranboo raises an eyebrow, unfazed. “Second, I’ve just decided you don’t get a choice in this situation.”

“Is that so?”

“Yes, dickhead.” Before Ranboo can protest, Tommy lunges forward and grabs one of his arms. The tactile contact with his skin means he’s unable to teleport away, and so he’s forced to allow this child to drag him in the vague direction Phil went when the two of them parted ways just minutes ago.

Ranboo will be honest; this isn’t how he expected his first day here to play out at all.

“Alright, now if I know Philza Minecraft – which I do – he’s definitely fucked off to some random-ass cave to get diamonds.” Tommy’s grip on Ranboo’s arm loosens for a brief moment, and Ranboo takes the opportunity to free himself from his grasp, scowling.

“Well, if that’s the case, then how do you expect to find him?”

Tommy smirks, pulling out his communicator and tapping something out. A few seconds later, it buzzes, and Tommy grins.

“Very easily, my Enderian comrade,” Tommy says, pocketing the device. “Phil just sent me his coordinates.”

Right, Ranboo forgot that’s a thing. “Ah.”

Tommy hops forward, frantically beckoning Ranboo to follow. “C’mon, we gotta find him!”

Reluctantly, Ranboo trails behind Tommy as they start walking again, his ears hanging low. “What’s your plan once we find him, exactly…?”

Tommy giggles, glancing over his shoulder. “Wanna know a secret?”

Ranboo raises an eyebrow, suspicious. “Sure…?”

Tommy looks back in front of him, and Ranboo focuses his gaze on the white and red feathers protruding from the kid’s back. They’re rather dishevelled, but not in such a way which indicates a lack of preening. Rather, it seems as if the wings have grown out in a very awkward manner. It’s unlikely they’re suited for prolonged flight.

“Phil’s biggest weakness…” Tommy pauses, presumably for dramatic effect, “is baby zombies.”

Zombies. Ranboo has heard of those; mobs which resemble deceased persons walking. He has yet to encounter one, but the stories he’s heard assure him that defeating it will be a rather easy feat. He’s heard very little about their baby counterparts, but he knows better than to underestimate anything in this world.

“Because I like him,” Tommy continues, “we aren’t going to do anything too extreme. We’re just gonna sneak in and pretend some of those little fuckers are coming to kill him.”

I doubt he’d believe you. “And how exactly are you planning on pulling that off?”

“Oh, I’ve done shit like this a lot. You just imitate the mob where they can’t see you and they freak the hell out.”

Okay, that… kind of makes sense, Ranboo has to admit. However…

“This seems like it’d just be a one-man job, though. Why am I getting dragged into this?”

“Because pulling pranks alone is boring, and nobody wants to help me anymore. You get sick of the isolation after a while, trust me.” Tommy then comes to an abrupt stop, causing Ranboo to almost bump into him. In front of them is a small cave, lined with stone. Ranboo can hear the faint sound of running water echoing within, and a shiver runs down his spine.

“This is it.” Tommy leaps towards the entrance, his wings slowly flapping to give himself some additional airtime. Ranboo lines himself up to follow, teleporting just beside Tommy’s landing zone. This is Ranboo’s last chance to back out, but he gets the feeling the kid wouldn’t allow it. He supposes he can tolerate Tommy for just a bit longer, and then he can get back to finishing the tour – assuming Phil doesn’t disown him after this – and establishing his place in the community.

“Let’s get this over with,” Ranboo mutters, and the two of them step into the cave. Immediately, Ranboo is overwhelmed by a plethora of sounds he doesn’t recognise, and he stares into the infinite darkness which greets them. Suddenly, light floods the area, and Ranboo turns to see Tommy holding a torch. Without a word, he bounds forward, and Ranboo continues to follow. An indeterminate amount of time later, they arrive at an area which appears to have been deliberately dug out, and as the two of them turn a corner, Phil comes into view, back facing them as he rummages through a chest haphazardly placed on the ground.

Tommy’s eyes are practically sparkling.

In Ranboo’s opinion, it’s absolutely for the wrong reasons.

“I suddenly regret letting you drag me into this.”

Tommy doesn’t respond, and Ranboo realises he’s moved forward, and is now slowly creeping towards Phil. Ranboo opens his mouth, either to stop Tommy or warn Phil – he isn’t too sure himself, but Tommy acts before he gets a chance to intervene. Faux groans and snarls echo through the cave system, though they’re not as deep as what Ranboo has been told zombies sound like. Well, Tommy did mention baby zombies specifically, so that isn’t too surprising. He’s simply imitating the youths of the species.

Phil flinches, almost dropping the armful of logs he’s retrieved from the chest. “Fucking— Christ, Tommy.” He tosses the logs aside, turning to face the boy. “Jesus, how many times do I have to tell you not to do that, you little shit—”

Tommy is in hysterics. Ranboo watches from afar, utterly perplexed. His confusion only grows when Phil starts laughing too. When the laughter eventually dies down, Phil ruffles Tommy’s hair, chuckling. “Alright, alright, you got me. I’ll admit, your impression is getting better, Tom.”

Ranboo hears a faint gasp. “Really?”

“Mhm, though I’m not sure whether I should be proud or scared.”

Tommy snorts, and there’s silence for a beat.

“Oh, by the way, you haven’t been bothering Ranboo, have you? I know how you get with new people…”

Tommy freezes, and Ranboo notices his body tense up. “Uh—”

“You did, didn't you.”

“…Yes.”

Treating the response as some sort of cue, Ranboo teleports into view. As if expecting his arrival, Phil simply smiles, while Tommy is visibly fighting to hold in another bout of laughter.

“For the record,” Ranboo starts, “I did absolutely nothing.”

“Yeah, because you’re a prick,” Tommy mutters, squawking indignantly when one of Phil’s wings smacks him upside the head.

“You’re such a dick to people, Tom,” Phil says, but the words lack any malice. He looks at Ranboo, though diverts his gaze slightly from his eyes, which he appreciates. “See what I meant when I said he’s a little shit?”

Ranboo huffs out a laugh. “I’ll be honest, I may have underestimated his, uh… determination.”

Phil wraps a wing around Tommy, pulling him close. “As expected, he takes after his big brother. Both of you are persistent as fuck.”

“Fuck off, it’s a talent.”

“Whatever you say.”

Ranboo suddenly feels very awkward. This… isn’t how he expected this prank to go. At all. Would this even count as a prank? It honestly felt more like some sort of troll. Clearly, Overworlders are much stranger than he initially assumed.

On a related note, he gets the feeling that, for the duration of his time here, he will be witnessing many more feats of TommyInnit, the Prank Master.

Tommy’s hypothetical words, not his.

“There appears to be a child skulking around my farm.”

Ranboo looks up from his inventory interface, just in time to catch the approach of a very grumpy looking Bunny. Over their shoulder, Ranboo can see the impromptu carrot farm set up on the outskirts of the SMP, and it doesn’t take him long to notice a familiar face hiding out in one of the trees.

“I take it this is typical Tommy behaviour?”

“Oh, absolutely.” Ranboo’s communicator buzzes, but he ignores it. “Good to know you’re quick to catch on.”

“I’ve been here a week; I’d like to think that’s enough time to get to know the people here, Techno. Plus, I had an encounter with him on my first day, so I’m well aware of his, uh… antics.”

“Ah, that’s right, Phil mentioned you got dragged into his mischief not long after you got here.” Techno chuckles. “Happens to the best of us.”

Ranboo’s communicator buzzes again.

“You should really answer that.”

It buzzes twice more.

“Yep, okay— Yeah, I should.”

He retrieves the device from his pocket, dismissing the interface in front of him as he pulls up the recent messages.

TommyInnit whispers to you: Ranboo TommyInnit whispers to you: answer me dickhead TommyInnit whispers to you: lure techno away TommyInnit whispers to you: I wanna mess with his shit

“Judgin’ by the look on your face, I’m guessing it’s Tommy.”

Ranboo nods. He isn’t surprised Techno can tell; he’s been told on numerous occasions that he has a very readable face. Whether that’s a compliment or an insult, however, he has no idea.

Techno sighs, but Ranboo catches a glimpse of a faint smile playing about his lips.

“Well, lucky for him, I have to go meet Scott. Said I’d help him with somethin’. Unfortunately, it involves leaving my precious carrot farm vulnerable to attack, but alas, this is how it must be.”

How subtle, Ranboo thinks, though he chooses not to comment. He simply watches Techno walk away, half expecting him to turn back and wink just to add the cherry on top of his very obvious scheme. Unfortunately for Techno and his noble sacrifice, Ranboo absolutely does not want to be dragged into any more of TommyInnit’s shenanigans.

He glances down at his communicator again.

TommyInnit whispers to you: wow that was fast TommyInnit whispers to you: idk what you did but it worked so I’m not complaining TommyInnit whispers to you: won’t force you to help out this time I just need you to pretend you never saw me TommyInnit whispers to you: I’ll kick your ass if I find out you snitched though

Ranboo’s been given an out. Unlike last time, he isn’t being forced to participate, and he gets the feeling Phil’s scolding — could it be considered that? — in the mine contributed to that. All he has to do is walk away and deny that he ever saw Tommy anywhere near Techno’s carrot farm.

However, the pull of curiosity is a powerful force.

You whisper to TommyInnit: what’re you planning on doing exactly??

A response comes through moments later.

TommyInnit whispers to you: replacing the carrot seeds with potato seeds TommyInnit whispers to you: had a stash lying around

Ah, Ranboo thinks, how convenient.

TommyInnit whispers to you: anyway run along now boob boy you don’t wanna be caught with the dirty crime boy while he’s on duty ;)

Ranboo’s nose scrunches up. Boob boy? What kind of nickname is that? He can’t possibly let this blatant slander slide, so, as Tommy floats down from his amateurish hiding spot, he teleports to the boy’s side. Tommy flinches, but doesn’t descend into a blathering mess of swears and other profanities, which… could be seen as some form of growth? Maybe? Whatever, it doesn’t matter.

“What’re you doing?” are the first words out of Tommy’s mouth, his brow furrowing in what Ranboo recognises all too well as subtly masked scepticism. It’s a valid question; Ranboo isn’t too sure what he’s doing himself. Unlike last time, he’s been given the opportunity to walk away, and yet here he is, chasing this crime-obsessed child by choice.

He shrugs. “Keeping you company, I guess.”

“Why?”

“Dunno — Guess I’m just kinda curious about what stunt you’re gonna pull this time around.”

“Huh.” Tommy blinks. “After last time I almost thought you wanted nothing to do with me.”

“Oh don’t get me wrong I still don’t; I’m literally only here to see what you do to Techno’s farm. Like I said, it’s pure curiosity, don’t read into it.”

Tommy snickers under his breath, biting his lip to hold back full-blown laughter. “Alright…”

“I’m serious.”

“Whatever you say, boob boy.”

Choosing to ignore the nickname this time around, silently hoping it doesn’t stick, Ranboo follows Tommy over to the farm. He wrinkles his nose as the potent stench of damp dirt wafts up his nostrils, and he opts to watch from afar as Tommy gets to work, but not before being instructed to, “Keep an eye out for Techno, will ya?”

The operation only takes a few minutes, which comes as little surprise to Ranboo. It’s literally just replacing seeds in a field; it isn’t exactly anything glamorous. Per Tommy’s request, he keeps an eye out for Techno, though he doubts they’ll be caught.

“Ranboo!”

Ranboo squints against the midday sunlight, searching for Tommy who turns out to be a few paces away from the farm, looking as if he’s about to break out into a sprint.

“It’s done.” He grins, beckoning Ranboo towards him. “Let’s get outta here before anyone sees.”

Ranboo nods, teleporting to Tommy’s side. The two of them begin walking away from the scene, and then Ranboo’s communicator buzzes, because of course it does.

Technoblade whispers to you: yeah you two aren’t subtle at all

He can’t help but agree.

If Ranboo has learned anything since he arrived here, it’s that meetings at the Pube can get loud. Everyone gathered in one place creates a rowdy atmosphere by itself, but if you add unending idle chatter on top of that, the environment becomes borderline unbearable. Phil tries his hardest to reign in the chaos, but that normally takes up to ten minutes purely because everyone is caught up in their own personal conversations. This time, however, he seems to have given up on those feeble attempts. Ranboo can’t blame him.

“No, Tommy, listen— I know you’ve been through my shit. Don’t try to deny it; I know you’re the only one who’d have the balls to do it right under my nose.”

“Wilbur! I would never lay a finger on any of your precious belongings. I’m offended you’d accuse me of doing such a thing.”

“You are so full of shit—“

Ranboo glances over towards one of the far corners of the room, and, lo and behold, Tommy is there, arguing with a partially translucent man. Based on what he’s been told, he can safely assume this is Tommy’s brother, Wilbur.

“Uh–” Ranboo approaches the two, but shrinks back when both of them turn to look at him, their stares seemingly burning into his very soul. His ears press against the sides of his head, and he swallows the lump that has lodged itself into his throat. “Sorry, um– Am I interrupting something?”

What a stupid question; of course he’s interrupting something. For the love of Jean, the two of them were literally just arguing, or at the very least having a rather heated conversation.

Tommy waves a hand in his general direction, dismissive. “Just my beloved big brother accusing me of terrible crimes.”

“Yeah, except you absolutely committed them. Now hand over my stuff, muggle boy.”

Ranboo plants his hands on his hips, huffing out an exasperated sigh as the two of them continue to bicker. 

Brothers.

“I don’t have your shit, Wil! Look–” Tommy opens his inventory interface and shows it to Wilbur, who examines it closely. From Ranboo’s angle, he can’t see anything of substance; just some bread, a water bucket, a few stacks of cobblestone, and a set of tools.

“This is bullshit – I bet you’ve stashed it somewhere–”

“Okay, okay,” Ranboo interrupts, stepping between the two, “settle down, boys.”

To their credit, Tommy and Wilbur do step down, but not before throwing one last scathing glare at each-other.

“Now,” Ranboo pinches the bridge of his nose, “what’s got you two fighting like this? Phil’s already got enough on his plate as it is, so if the need arises, y’know, maybe I can help.”

Without uttering a word in response, Wilbur crosses his arms, closes his eyes, and drops through the floor. Tommy shrieks, and subsequently begins cursing up a storm when Wilbur rises up behind him and grabs him by the shoulders.

“This dirty crime boy,” Wilbur says, shaking Tommy from side to side, “stole from my stash of precious valuables right under my nose.”

“I did not!” Tommy shoves Wilbur off. “Don’t listen to him, Ranboo; I’d never do such a thing to my dear brother.”

“You can deny it all you want—“

Wilbur proceeds to rant on and on; Ranboo quickly stops listening. Glancing towards Tommy, he sees the kid staring at him with enlarged eyes, his lips quivering way too much for it to be genuine.

Is he seriously giving me the puppy-dog eyes right now?

This isn’t a court of law; Ranboo shouldn’t have to step in to defend Tommy on his behalf. The kid has proven he’s more than capable of handling himself in much worse situations than a petty fight with his brother, but he suspects this is yet another one of his schemes.

It’s another example of an opportunity to walk away he doesn’t take.

“Y’know, Wil,” Ranboo interrupts, raising an eyebrow as a mischievous smile plays on his lips, “I’m pretty sure you went rummaging through Tommy’s blocks the other day. Probably isn’t my place to say this, but…”

Wilbur’s eyes are wide as saucers.

“I dunno—“ Ranboo shrugs. Time to deliver the final blow. “Maybe this is karma for your crimes.”

Tommy loses his shit. Wilbur looks like he’s just taken psychic damage, and for the first time since Ranboo approached, the man seems genuinely lost for words. Tommy barks out a laugh, eliciting confused and mildly irritated stares.

“I— Wha—” Wilbur glances between Tommy and Ranboo, helpless. “You’re siding with him?”

“You’re damn right he is!” Ranboo flinches as Tommy claps him heartily on the back — likely because he’s too short to reach his shoulders. “That’s what you get for stealing my blocks, fucker.”

Wilbur is unimpressed.

“I actually hate you.” There is no malice behind his words, and Tommy simply sticks his tongue out at him. Wilbur rolls his eyes and fondly ruffles Tommy’s hair, confusing Ranboo greatly. Weren’t they literally just fighting?

Oh, right, he thinks. Brothers.

Wilbur flicks Tommy on the back of the head, dropping through the floor again when he yelps. Tommy scrambles to grab him, but has no luck. He and Ranboo fall silent, not making a sound for several seconds until Ranboo pipes up.

“Well.” Ranboo blinks. “That was… a thing.”

Tommy snorts. “Can’t believe you actually managed to shut him up. Pretty sure you just saved my ass, big man.”

“Yeah, sure— Okay, I have to know; did you seriously steal stuff from him?”

Tommy’s eyes twinkle. The expression is all too familiar.

“Technically, no.” He glances around, and his voice drops to a whisper. Ranboo has to lean in to hear him over the chatter. “I made Shelby do it.”

Ranboo’s eyes grow wide. “Shubble? How’d you manage that?”

“Bribed her with food for Nunubu,” Tommy responds.

“That’s all?”

“The fuck’s that mean?”

“I dunno.” Ranboo shrugs. “I guess I assumed she’d want something more valuable.”

“Yeah, but she wasn’t about to pass up an opportunity to fuck with Wilbur by asking for something I couldn’t deliver.”

“...Fair enough,” Ranboo responds.

Meanwhile, on the opposite side of the Pube, a floating Jack-o-Lantern sits in a corner, its gaze fixed on the Avian and Enderian. A feminine giggle emerges from it, the subtle reverberation bouncing off the wooden walls. A translucent body fades into view, and long, dark brown hair billows out from their headwear. They remove the Jack-o-Lantern, revealing bright yellow eyes which shine much like the sun. Upon pocketing the item, they begin toying with something else from their inventory; something that doesn’t necessarily belong to them.

Shubble has made the advancement [Diamonds!]

“Ranboo!”

Jack Manifold’s shout catches Ranboo off guard. The bucket of milk in his arms almost topples to the ground, but after fumbling for a brief moment, he manages to catch it before any of the liquid has the opportunity to spill out.

“Ah shit, sorry mate,” Jack says as he approaches. “Forgot you startle easily.”

Ranboo shakes his head, smiling. “Nah, don’t worry about it; you just surprised me. What’s up?”

Jack huffs, planting his hands on his hips. “Someone’s gone rummaging through my stuff and stole three whole stacks of blaze rods. I feel like I’ve interrogated half the server; nobody’s fessing up.”

Ranboo begins gnawing on the inside of his cheek, and his ears droop. “Oh man, that– That sucks, man.”

Jack’s brow suddenly furrows. Ranboo opens his mouth to inquire as to what has prompted the sudden change, but then the man leans in uncomfortably close, looking just off to the side of his eyes.

“It wasn’t you who stole my shit, was it?”

“Wha– no!” Ranboo takes a step back, holding up his hands in a placating gesture. “No, of course not.”

Without breaking his gaze, Jack nods. “Okay.” He returns to an upright position, a comfortable distance away. “In that case, I want you to come with me.”

“Why?”

“Well, interrogating people alone hasn’t exactly been working out for me; I feel I’ll need some backup.”

Oh, joy.

“Sure, I guess. Not sure I’m your best option though…”

“Don’t say that.” Jack grins. “You’re plenty good.”

Ranboo doesn’t respond, but he feels his cheeks warm instantaneously with the comment.

“Now, I’ve already talked to Shelby and Scott,” Jack mutters, seemingly to himself. “Phil’s been supervising Sneeg all day, and I’d like to think Tubbo and Wil know better than to touch stuff that isn’t theirs…” He throws his head back, groaning. “Shit.”

“Uh—“ Ranboo takes a step forward. “Isn’t it possible someone might’ve been lying? It’d probably be more effective if we, y’know, actually went through their stuff to make sure.”

Jack’s eyes light up. “You mad fucking genius; you’re right!” He rushes forward and grabs Ranboo’s forearm. “C’mon, let’s get going while nobody’s home.”

Albeit reluctantly, Ranboo allows himself to be dragged across the SMP by Jack, stumbling several times as he frantically attempts to get his own two feet beneath him.

Eventually, they end up at Tommy’s house. Jack finally releases his vice-like grip on Ranboo’s arm and proceeds to make a beeline for the building without saying a word. Ranboo hurriedly follows, silently praying Jack is right about nobody being home. Thankfully, when they enter, all is quiet.

“Alright,” Jack says, “here’s the plan. I’ll go have a peek in Tom’s chests while you keep a lookout and let me know if anyone’s coming.”

Ah, so he’s the surveillance guy. Typical. He steps into the main room, leaning up against a nearby wall just as his communicator buzzes and he spots a flash of blond hair in his peripherals.

TommyInnit whispers to you: sup bitch TommyInnit whispers to you: look up

Ranboo rolls his eyes at the messages, though he supposes he should’ve expected this. He looks up and immediately finds a face peering down at him from the rafters.

“Hi, Tommy.”

Tommy’s eyes widen, and he urgently presses a finger to his lips, gesturing to the communicator strapped to his hip before reaching for it again.

TommyInnit whispers to you: dont tell jack im here TommyInnit whispers to you: lure him in

Ranboo decides not to question how the hell Tommy got up there. Honestly, he doesn’t really want to know.

“Right, so this child has literally nothing of value, good to know–”

Jack emerges from somewhere else in the house, coming to a stop in the doorway. Out of the corner of his eye, Ranboo sees Tommy slink back into the shadows, unseen by those not specifically looking for him. “Think I can safely say Tommy didn’t take any of my shit. Unless he has some sort of secret stash…” Ranboo thinks he remembers Tommy mentioning something like that recently, but the uncharacteristic desire for chaos urges him to keep quiet. Instead, he says something else.

“Hey, Jack… can you c’mere a sec?���

Jack’s brow furrows. Yes, even Ranboo himself knows how blatantly suspicious this is, but he doesn’t exactly have a plethora of options for luring the guy over, especially considering he has no idea what Tommy plans on doing to him.

Several seconds pass, and Jack doesn’t move, his arms now crossed loosely over his chest. He raises an eyebrow, and Ranboo, slowly running out of cares to give, decides to take more of a direct approach; just to move things along. He teleports behind Jack, grabbing his shoulders, and as Jack begins shouting profanities and attempts to wriggle out of his hold, he, with great effort, pushes him into the room.

“Oi, you cock! What’re you–”

Water abruptly trickles down from the rafters, suspiciously close to where Tommy has been hiding. A few droplets land on Jack’s head, and he shrieks. Ranboo leaps back to avoid the assault, watching the man’s scalp begin to literally steam with the amount of water it’s being exposed to. Some of the water runs down his face, and Ranboo has to bite his tongue to hold back a laugh as Jack starts squirming on the spot, feebly attempting to mask his pain.

“That’s what you get for trespassing, bitch!”

Jack’s nose screws up. “What do you mean?!” he squawks, wincing as he wrings the water out of his damp hair. “Ranboo’s here too, you dick; why are you targeting me?!”

“Ranboo’s got special clearance,” Tommy responds, jumping down from the rafters and planting his hands on his hips. “Unfortunately for you, Jack Manifold,” he says, retrieving his communicator and tapping at it idly, “I don’t seem to have you on the list.”

Jack’s jaw locks, and his eyes grow wide with raw, unbridled rage. “Since when was there a list–”

Ranboo half expects the man to erupt, much like a volcano, but Tommy steps forward before things can escalate any further, throwing an arm around Jack’s shoulders. He’s biting his bottom lip, hard enough to the point that Ranboo can see the tiniest amount of blood trickling from a small wound. The quiet wheezes he can hear makes him suspect Tommy is making an attempt not to descend into hysterics, which is honestly very valiant of him considering one wrong move could cause Jack’s emotions to spill over.

“Don’t take it personally, big man.” Tommy pats Jack’s shoulder with his free hand, which Ranboo doesn’t really get considering Tommy’s other arm is already around his shoulders. “It was just a harmless prank. Needed some entertainment, y’know?” He sticks out his bottom lip. “You forgive me, right?”

Jack sighs, his simmering rage seeming to trickle out of him all at once. Ranboo, demoted to an idle observer, watches with his head cocked to the side. He’s a little worried Jack won’t forgive Tommy, considering how furious he looked just a moment ago, but he finds himself to be proven wrong when Jack’s expression softens. He places a hand on Tommy’s head and proceeds to ruffle his hair, grinning.

“Oh, I suppose. I’d never hear the end of it if I didn’t.”

Tommy barks out a laugh, eyes alight with joy. “Damn right you wouldn’t!” Then, he locks Jack into a loose headlock, and that is the catalyst for the playful fight which follows. Ranboo doesn’t get himself involved; there isn’t a need to. Instead, he continues to watch from afar, smiling.

He stays there until the ‘battle’ ends, several hours later.

Ranboo never thought he’d see the day he would be willingly spending time with TommyInnit, but he supposes there’s a first time for everything. No words are being exchanged; they’re simply sitting on the edge of the island which the Pube sits upon. Ranboo actually finds it oddly relaxing.

“Hey, Ranboo…”

Oh no.

Tommy looks over at Ranboo, eyes twinkling. “It’s been a while since we did something together.”

Ranboo cocks his head to the side, brow furrowed. “Aren’t we doing something right now…?”

Tommy hugs his knees to his chest, resting his head on his arms. “Yeah, I guess– but I meant something a little more exciting.”

Oh no.

“Tommy, no–”

“Tommy, yes.” Tommy grins. “C’mon, you’ve been my partner in crime for too long to back out now!”

Ranboo frowns. “I feel like I’m being manipulated.”

“Oh, you absolutely are,” Tommy says, stretching his legs out and lifting his arms above his head. Once he’s finished stretching, he snaps his fingers a few times, brow furrowed in thought. “Now who would be a viable target…”

Ranboo speaks up without thinking. “I don’t think Sneeg’s gonna be too busy today.”

Tommy beams, his eyes practically shining. Ranboo physically recoils, his ears pressing against the sides of his head. He shouldn’t have said anything.

“Perfect.”

Ranboo’s lips twitch. “You’ve already got a plan, haven’t you.”

Tommy leaps to his feet, puffing out his chest. “Indeed! A very simple one, in fact.”

“Oh?”

Tommy snickers, glancing around for a moment before whispering, “We’re gonna fill Sneeg’s secret tunnel system with lava.”

Ranboo blinks. “Sneeg has a secret tunnel system?”

“Yes, because he’s a little shit who has this weird obsession with living in people’s walls.”

Ah, that makes perfect sense.

It really doesn’t, but Ranboo doesn’t feel like questioning it any further, so he lets Tommy do his thing. The boy runs off, disappearing into the Pube for several seconds before returning with a bucket of lava in his possession, an evil grin growing on his face.

“Wha— Did you just have that lying around?!”

“…Yeah?” Tommy responds, as if that kind of thing is normal.

“...Understandable, have a nice day.”

Tommy barks out a laugh, yelping when the lava starts sloshing around in the bucket. He takes a moment to steady it, breathing a quiet sigh of relief when the liquid settles. Ranboo giggles to himself, but abruptly cuts himself off when he feels the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. This is followed by a low, ominous voice ringing out, right in his ear.

“The fuck was that, chicken boy?”

Tommy screams. Out of the corner of his eye, Ranboo spots a tiny man sitting on his shoulder – how the hell did he not notice Sneeg was here sooner. Sneeg hops down and approaches Tommy, craning his neck upward to look him in the eyes.

“Where the hell did you come from?!”

“I’m always watching,” is Sneeg’s response. Ranboo hauls himself to his feet as Tommy and Sneeg initiate some sort of scuffed staring contest for literally no reason, and Tommy makes absolutely no effort to hide the blatant evidence of his and Ranboo’s plan to basically commit arson on Sneeg’s tunnel system.

“That’s great and all, bud, but Ranboo and I are kinda busy. So, if you could kindly fuck off–”

Without warning, Sneeg rushes forward, attaching himself to Tommy’s ankle. Caught off guard, Tommy lifts his foot and begins hopping around, shaking it furiously in a feeble attempt to throw the tiny man off. Eventually, he stumbles, and Ranboo’s heart drops into his stomach when he topples over, falling off the island. For a very brief moment, he forgets Tommy is capable of negating the consequences that typically accompany a fall from an extreme height.

Ranboo teleports down to where Tommy fell, and finds himself a witness to Tommy, an Avian, somehow being overpowered by an Inchling. An Inchling.

“Ranboo–” Tommy yelps as Sneeg tugs on his hair, cackling, having climbed up onto his shoulders. “Ranboo, help–”

“Thought you’d be able to get away with pranking me, huh?!” Sneeg grins maniacally. “I know you, Tommy. I knew you’d target me eventually.” He tugs on Tommy’s hair again, hard.

“Ow– Hey, Sneeg, listen–” Another tug. “OW– C’mon, man, easy on the hair! I’m sorry, alright?!”

Sneeg cackles again, clearly enjoying this moment of power. “Say it like you mean it, Tommy–”

Ranboo rolls his eyes, supposing he has to intervene at some point. Careful to remain out of Sneeg’s sight, he teleports towards Tommy, gesturing for the boy to remain quiet as he reaches for the Inchling perched on his shoulder. He contemplates grabbing him, but decides he’d rather not have his fingers bitten. Instead, he simply holds his forefinger behind his thumb, flicking Sneeg away the moment the opportunity presents itself. Tommy releases a long breath, and his muscles visibly relax ever so slightly.

“Thank you, Ranboo,” Tommy breathes, rolling his shoulders and rubbing the back of his neck. “Jesus, I thought he was gonna kill me–”

“Great idea – I might just do that!”

Tommy screams again, pointing. Brow furrowed, Ranboo follows his finger, spotting Sneeg rushing towards them.

“I think we should run,” Ranboo murmurs.

Tommy nods. “Yeah– Yeah, we should. If I’m going to die, I don’t want it to be at the hands of Sneegsnag.”

The two of them start running, and Sneeg immediately proceeds to chase them down. Ranboo realises they don’t have an end location in mind, but chooses not to waste his breath asking. They’ll figure it out on their feet. They run past several landmarks Ranboo doesn’t have the opportunity to admire, and it feels like Sneeg chases them across the entire SMP. Eventually, Ranboo looks over and notices Tommy is looking rather fatigued, sweat dripping from his brow and his face pale.

“Hey,” Ranboo says, slowing when he confirms the coast is clear – for now, at least. “You good?”

Tommy comes to a stop beside Ranboo, placing his hands on his knees as he wheezes, coughing to the point he gags. “Yep. Yeah, I’m– I am just peachy.”

Ranboo raises an eyebrow, and one of his ears twitches when a nearby bush rustles. With Sneeg right on their tail once again, Ranboo comes to an impulsive decision. He turns so his back is facing Tommy, crouching slightly.

“Hop on.”

Tommy straightens, blinking. “What?”

“C’mon, just trust me. Hop on, and we’ll go hide in Wilbur’s potion store.” His voice drops to a murmur at that last part, and he hopes Sneeg doesn’t somehow pick up on it.

Tommy doesn’t argue any further. He pulls himself up onto Ranboo’s back, and Ranboo hooks his arms under the boy’s legs to prevent him from falling.

“Hold on tight, okay?” Ranboo smiles, shifting his grip slightly. “I’m not coming back for you if you fall off.”

“For the record I’ll never forgive you if you drop me.”

“I’m not gonna drop you, Tom,” Ranboo says, laughing. “Not on purpose, anyway…”

As if on cue, Sneeg leaps out from the bush nearby, and Ranboo runs. Ironically, Tommy is light as a feather, making it remarkably easy to navigate the SMP in such a way that Sneeg struggles to keep up the pursuit. Tommy cheers, laughing as he wraps his arms loosely around Ranboo’s neck. Though he can’t see him from his angle, Ranboo can tell Tommy is smiling from ear to ear.

“Vamos, loyal steed!” Tommy shouts. “We’re almost there!”

At this point, Ranboo gets the feeling Sneeg has given up, but he makes a beeline for Potions and Just Potions regardless.

“Holy shit,” Tommy breathes when they finally reach their destination, detaching himself from Ranboo and leaning against a nearby wall. “Holy fucking shit.”

The two of them are quiet for a moment, catching their breath while birds sing in the distance. Eventually, Tommy giggles. Then Ranboo giggles. Seconds later, the two of them descend into hysterics. It gets to the point where Tommy is wiping tears from his eyes and Ranboo is clutching his stomach, grinning to the point that his cheeks ache.

“Oh my god,” Tommy wheezes. “Shit, that was– That was fucking great.”

Ranboo nods, struggling somewhat to take in adequate oxygen. “Sneeg looked so mad.”

Tommy slides down the wall, stretching out his legs to the point that he’s almost laying on the floor. “He did.” He then takes several deep breaths – most likely to compose himself, his face flushed. “Probably gonna have to watch my ass for the next few days.”

Ranboo takes a seat next to Tommy, nodding. “Yeah, probably.”

“Might need a bodyguard or some shit.”

“I’m not being your bodyguard, Tommy.”

“Fuck.”

“Sorry.”

“...Oh well, at least I still have my lava bucket. Self defence, innit?”

Okay, note to self: Obtain a stockpile of water buckets, ASAP.

Tommy has been oddly quiet lately. He still involves himself with the day-to-day happenings of the SMP, but it feels… wrong, somehow. Ranboo knows he isn’t the first to notice, as he sees Tubbo’s knowing expression out of the corner of his eye as the boy wanders past, head hung low and eyes dull.

“Is he… okay?” Ranboo turns to Tubbo, who shrugs, frowning as he lowers himself to the ground where he’s been hovering.

“Not sure. This hasn’t happened for a while.” Tubbo crosses his arms loosely over his chest and begins chewing on the inside of his cheek. “Might just be a bad day, but I feel weird making assumptions.”

“Have you talked to him?”

“Of course. He didn’t really have a whole lot to say, though. I guess he just wants some space.”

Ranboo doesn’t press any further. Tubbo has known Tommy much longer than he has; he trusts his judgement. However…

“I’m gonna check on him. Y’know, just in case.”

Tubbo releases a long, slow breath, nodding. “Yeah, that’s— That’s a good idea, big man. Honestly, he might even open up to you more, considering you two have been practically joined at the hip these past couple of months.”

…Yeah, Ranboo supposes he only has himself to blame for that. He isn’t complaining, though; Tommy’s company makes a lot of things rather entertaining.

He turns to walk away, watching as Tommy rounds a corner in the distance and removes himself from his view.

“Um—” He turns back to Tubbo, whose lips are slightly parted. They press into a tight line, and he inhales sharply through his nose. “I’ve already told him, but… let Tom know we’re worried about him, yeah? I’m worried about him.”

Oh, Tubbo is far too wholesome for this world.

“Yeah.” Ranboo nods, smiling. “Yeah, I will.”

Tubbo grins, and Ranboo sets off in the vague direction Tommy was walking. To make the trip just a bit quicker, he teleports forward every few steps, and eventually, he reaches the crater surrounding the Pube. Perched on the edge, swinging their legs idly into the abyss below, is–

“Tommy!”

Tommy visibly flinches, glancing over his shoulder with a furrowed brow. Ranboo approaches slowly, kneeling down to the boy’s level before carefully placing a hand on his shoulder.

“Hey,” Ranboo murmurs, “you alright?”

Tommy shakes his head, hugging his knees to his chest and looking back out towards the Pube.

“Tubbo’s worried about you.”

“He’s always worried. He’s a clingy bitch.”

“Don’t say that,” Ranboo scolds. “He’s your friend; he cares about you. He just wants to make sure you’re okay.”

“You’re my friend too.”

“Yeah, but— That isn’t the point. Not the point—“

Tommy snorts. Ranboo smiles.

“Anyway,” Ranboo continues, pulling away and standing. “What’s got you feeling so down today, Tom?”

Tommy shrugs. “Dunno. Just an off day, I guess.”

Ranboo nods, humming sympathetically. He places his hands on his hips. “I get you; those kinds of days suck. Anything any of us can do to help you feel a little better?”

Tommy shrugs again, and Ranboo begins gnawing on his lip. He doesn’t want to leave Tommy alone while he’s feeling like this, but he has no idea what he could do to possibly brighten the boy’s mood—

Wait.

Disregard that previous statement he has the perfect idea.

“Hey.” Ranboo kneels down again, nudging Tommy. “Come with me for a sec? I want your help with something.”

Tommy sighs, but it’s loud and very much exaggerated. He hauls himself to his feet, running a hand through his frizzy hair. “If I must,” he says, jutting out his bottom lip. Ranboo laughs, motioning for Tommy to follow him as he turns and begins walking away. Tommy jogs to his side, glancing up at him with curious eyes, which Ranboo is just now noticing are rather red.

“Where’re we going?”

“Tubbo’s house.”

Tommy almost chokes.

“If you don’t want to talk to him right now, I’m not gonna make you.” Tommy breathes a quiet sigh of relief. “I just thought doing this would make you feel a bit better.”

“Doing what? You need to be a little less cryptic, boob boy.”

Ranboo’s ears twitch, and he smirks.

“We’re gonna mess with Tubbo.”

The way Tommy’s face lights up upon hearing those words brings about a warmth in Ranboo’s chest; a sensation he welcomes with open arms. The boy then proceeds to attach himself to Ranboo’s arm, grinning up at him.

“That I can get behind.”

Ranboo smiles, glad that Tommy already seems to be doing better than he was when he found him. He gently pries Tommy off of him and ruffles his hair fondly, placing a hand on his hip and pointing over his shoulder with his thumb. “C’mon then. If we’re lucky, he’ll still be home.”

There are no objections, so the two of them return to Tubbo’s home on stilts, pointedly ignoring the gaping hole in the adjacent mountain, which appears to have grown impossibly larger. Standing on the porch, no Tubbo in sight, Ranboo turns to Tommy. The boy simply blinks, confused, but Ranboo continues to stare expectantly. Tommy isn’t stupid; he’ll catch on.

“Wait— Don’t tell me I have to come up with the plan?”

There it is.

“You’re the boss,” Ranboo says, shrugging. “Guess I figured you’d have some better ideas than me.”

Tommy’s eyes are comically large. Ranboo almost laughs, but for the sake of the kid’s dignity, he refrains, waiting patiently as Tommy’s brain kicks into gear.

“…Yeah I’ve got nothing.”

“Seriously?”

“Being my best friend, Tubbo is my go-to for epic pranks. Unfortunately, this means he’ll probably be prepared for anything I throw at him – and I mean that both physically and metaphorically.”

Ranboo’s brow furrows in thought. “Right, okay–”

There’s the sound of a door opening nearby, and Ranboo is pulled into the shadows as Tubbo steps out of the house. Yeah, maybe it wasn’t the best idea to be having that conversation right outside the guy’s front door.

Ranboo and Tommy watch as Tubbo runs his hands through his tangled hair, not stopping until it has been adequately brushed. His wings start flapping rapidly, and with a loud, piercing buzz, he takes off, flying away from the house. Once the sound has faded into the distance, the duo emerges from their hiding place.

Wonder where he’s going.

Dismissing the thought, Ranboo looks over at Tommy, smiling. “I think that’s our cue.”

Tommy’s brow furrows, and he blinks. “Huh?”

Ranboo plants his hands on his hips, smirking. “I think I might have an idea, but we’ll need to head inside.” Noticing Tommy’s confused expression shift into one that is almost entirely blank, he frowns. “We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to, y’know. You– You can let me know if you wanna back out–”

“No.”

Tommy’s response is abrupt. Afterwards, he has more to say. Ranboo doesn’t interrupt.

“N-No, I– I want to do this. I want to do it with you.”

“You get sick of the isolation after a while, trust me.”

Something finally clicks. Since Ranboo arrived on the SMP, he hasn’t seen Tommy pull a single prank by himself, nor has he been informed of this occurrence by others residing on the SMP. He’s always dragged him along.

Ranboo is vaguely aware of the concept of instincts, and the fact that they exist in both Mobs and Origins alike. He figures these things may be related. One can only handle isolation for so long, especially when they encounter someone with whom they find themselves to grow to trust deeply.

This explains so much.

“Okay,” Ranboo says. “Yeah, alright– We’ll do it together, yeah?” Tommy nods. “Cool. We shouldn’t take too long; I genuinely have no idea when Tubbo will be back.”

The two of them duck inside the house, Tommy making sure to close the door behind them. He sticks close to the door while Ranboo ventures further into the house, searching for something they could use to their advantage in order to catch Tubbo off guard. There isn’t a whole lot of note; just a few chests, a pile of barrels in a corner, and the starting foundation of some basic furniture. Not a whole lot they can work with.

Ranboo looks back over towards the door, where Tommy has begun browsing through his inventory. Squinting, Ranboo spots something interesting in the boy’s possession as he scrolls.

“Hey, Tom?”

Tommy hums.

“Mind if I steal that bucket of milk from your inventory?”

Tommy looks up from the interface, cocking his head to the side. “Sure…?” He retrieves the bucket from his inventory and hands it to Ranboo without a word, who gestures for Tommy to move away from the door before approaching it himself.

“What’re you–”

“Just trust me,” Ranboo says, glancing over his shoulder at Tommy and winking. “Tubbo won’t see this coming.”

With a bit of work – and some precise placement, Ranboo eventually manages to successfully craft a simple door trap, the bucket of milk he has ‘borrowed’ from Tommy poised to fall onto the next person to walk through the door to Tubbo’s house. This kind of trap has many flaws, of course, but it’s the first thing Ranboo came up with, and he’s confident Tubbo won’t expect it, just as he told Tommy.

Of course, there’s always the possibility that Tubbo won’t be the one who comes through the door…

“Tommy.”

“Yeah?”

“Shoot Tubbo a message, will you? Give him a reason to come home fast; I don’t wanna risk someone else triggering this.”

Tommy has already pulled out his communicator, and throws a thumbs up in Ranboo’s general direction as he types. “Already on it, big man.”

“Cool, thanks.”

After the message is sent, and Tubbo confirms he’s on his way, Tommy and Ranboo are left waiting for several minutes, which Tommy insists feel like hours. The two of them lounge around on impromptu chairs made from oak stairs, scrolling idly through message history and the depths of their inventories, until eventually, they hear the approach of a familiar buzzing. Acting quickly, Ranboo grabs Tommy, pulling him aside to hide behind the pile of blocks they’d placed down in advance, giving them a perfect view of the show while remaining concealed from view.

There’s a muffled, “Tom?” from outside, and Tommy begins snickering. Ranboo nudges him, shushing him quietly despite also being close to laughing himself. Tommy bites the inside of his cheek, wincing when he seems to bite down just a little too hard.

“Tom?” Tubbo calls again, and the door swings open. “Tom, are you–”

Right on cue, the bucket falls, landing exactly where it was intended to: Onto Tubbo’s head.

“Ah!” Tubbo stumbles backward, fumbling with the bucket as he moves to pry it off. He is eventually successful, and, after throwing the bucket aside, brushes his sopping wet hair out of his eyes. Beside Ranboo, Tommy rolls backwards, a laughing fit much like the one back in Potions and Just Potions quickly overtaking him. With Tommy incapacitated, Ranboo takes it upon himself to retrieve an axe and chop the blocks away which make up their hiding place. Meanwhile, Tubbo watches with wide eyes, his expression a mixture of both bewilderment and rage.

“Motherfuckers.”

Tommy’s laugh becomes impossibly louder; infectious to the point that Ranboo has to allow himself to have a little chuckle just to prevent a descent into hysterics.

“Fuck you guys, seriously,” Tubbo says, though there is no malice behind his words. “I’m gonna have to go shower now, you dicks. That’ll be the fourth time this week–”

Tubbo storms off into another room, muttering to himself the entire way, and Tommy cackles, his laughter slowly dying down after that. “Oh, fuck,” he breathes. “I forgot how great this feeling is.” He looks up at Ranboo, who has gotten to his feet and is currently brushing the stray dust off his clothing. The two of them lock eyes, and oddly enough, Ranboo doesn’t feel the irritation he and his fellow Endermen experience when faced with direct eye contact with those not of their kind.

Tommy grins. “Thanks, Ranboo.”

“For what?”

Tommy sits up, shrugging. “I dunno– lightening the mood, I guess. I’d probably still be wallowing in my own sadness if you hadn’t come along. Even if it was at Tubbo’s request.”

“Hey, I’ll have you know I volunteered.”

Tommy laughs. “I know, I know, I’m just fucking with you.” He hauls himself to his feet, wrapping his arms around Ranboo from his side. “But seriously, thank you.”

Ranboo gets the feeling he’s thankful for more than just today.

He keeps quiet about that, though. He wouldn’t want to embarrass his friend.

[crumbsispoggers]

New life references for Martyn And Scott! I also decided to try a new signature for my art, new signature down below

maybe doodles will come by the next few days

edit: I forgot that my nlsmp Scott art before the reference had a different design for the glove, so I fixed it

[annaraebananawriter]

Next, and final, piece. She was alone. This piece…

(—I don’t want to remember I don’t want to remember I don’t want to remember I don’t want to remember I don’t want to remember I don’t want to remember I don’t want to remember I don’t want to remember—she repeated the line over and over and over and over, holding her hands over her ears more tightly, rocking in place. She blocked everything out, curled up tight in a ball in a corner of the dusty library of dull looking books. She—I don’t want to remember I don’t want to remember I don’t want to remember I can’t remember I can’t—)

This piece is the most troublesome. She didn’t want to think about it right now. She puts it aside and, realizing the other pieces couldn’t fit together without it, abandons the whole piece. It wasn’t like she didn’t have time to finish it later. She would.

She couldn’t go home anymore.

OR

A look at what Osmp!Ranboo's backstory might be like. That's...pretty much it.

***

WARNING: MIGHT CONTAIN SCENES THAT TUG YOUR HEART, FLUFF, AND CHARACTER DEATH.

READER DISCRETION IS ADVISED.

Written as a gift for @azurecake16 for the @mcytblrholidayexchange. Sorry it’s late!

Hey there! So sorry for the extra wait for your gift! I procrastinated a bit too close to the sun, I'm afraid. But I hope you like it.

I decided to go with something different to what I usually write, as you said you liked seeing people's headcannons and I could go wild with that. What's wilder than a whole personal interpretation of what Origins!Ranboo's background might be like? This uses the trasfem Ranboo headcannon and combines it with the headcannon that Ranboo has two moms. I've also added Aimsey as her cousin, but she's never really referred to by name. None of them are, really.

This'll make sense in the next part. But that might not be out for another month yet. It depends. Sorry about that!

As a bit of a reminder/to clarify: this whole thing is from Ranboo's POV.

But...happy reading!

[does-it-introject]

QUEUE CHECKLIST

[pt: Queue Checklist /end pt]

... will get updated every once in a while! Also hidden below the cut due to the amount of requests!

In the queue waiting is:

Murder Drones

Subnautica (Franchise)

Danganronpa

Jujutsu Kaisen

Dungeon Meshi

Mass Effect (Series)

Danger Days: The True Life Of Fabulous Killjoys

Lord Of The Rings

Fallout 4

QSMP

Transformers

Amphibia

Sk8 The Infinity

Hermitcraft

Owl House

Creepypasta

Life Series

Once Human

Star Trek (Franchise)

Bluey

My Hero Academia

VTubers

Skibidi Toilet

Demon Slayer

Ride The Cyclone

Dandy's World

Robert De Niro

Neon Genesis Evangelion

Poppy Playtime

How To Train Your Dragon

Komi Can't Communicate

Madoka Magica

Deadlock

Full Metal Alchemist (2003)

Mandela Catalogue

Overwatch

Voltron Legendary Defenders

Good Omens

The Walten Files

Chainsaw Man

Outlast

Spookys Jumpscare Mansion

SCP Universe

Class Of 09

Remnant: From The Ashes

Full Metal Alchemist: Brotherhood

Arcane

Hiveswap

Warcraft Universe (WOW, Warcraft, ...)

Friendsim

Inscryption

Starcraft (Franchise)

Vocaloid

Still Wakes The Deep

Roblox

Riverdale

Hazbin Hotel

Red Dead Redeption 2 (RDR2)

Monster High

Doom 64

Into The Spiderverse

Spider Gang (Music Collective)

Silent Hill (Universe)

Helldivers 2

The Magnus Archives

Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU)

DC Cinematic Universe

My Demon (Kdrama)

Needy Streamer Overload

Stardew Valley

Honkai Star Rail

Hellpoint

Alien vs. Predators

Cookie Run (Franchise)

OneShot

Critical Role

Castlevania

Markiplier Cinematic Universe

Gravity Falls

Palworld

Stray Kids (Kpop)

Soul Eater

Bendy And The Ink Machine (Universe)

Shakespeare

Ace Attorney

Kid Icarus

Slimecicle Cinematic Universe

Signalis

LGBTQ+

Kancolle

Loop SMP

Parkour Civilization

Warframe

Jacksepticeye Cinematic Universe

Sherlock BBC

Dimension 20

Friends (/factives, not the show)

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2012)

Tiger X Bunny

Just Shapes And Beats

Puyo Puyo

Tale Of The Nine Tailed

Wuthering Waves

Alter Ego (Mobile Game)

Warhammer

What Remains Of Edith Finch

My Little Pony

Rabbit And Steel

GrayStillPlays

Magic The Gathering

Epic The Musical

Azur Lane

Magical Girl Raising Project

Nevermore (Webtoon)

Destiny 2

Numbers

Remnant II

Vermintide I and II

Mr. Robot

Severance

Sailor Moon

Eddsworld

Kingdom Hearts

Dead By Daylight

Arknights

Kamen Rider

Ni No Kuni

Arrow (TV Show)

Nimona

RWBY

I'm The Grim Reaper (Webtoon)

Welcome To Demon School Iruma-kun! (Mairimashita Iruma-kun)

Call Of Duty

Plants Vs Zombies (Original Game)

#Actually Plural (The Tag)

The Concept Of Math

The Evillious Chronicles

Cry Of Fear

Kingdom Hearts

Family Members

Resident Evil (Franchise)

Lego Ninjago

Five Nights At Freddys (Rerun)

Umbrella Academy

Professor Layton

Helluva Boss

I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream

Zenless Zone Zero

JoJos Bizarre Adventure

Steven Universe

Warrior Cats

Fight Club (Rerun)

Bojack Horseman

Battle For Dream Island

Spongebob Squarepants

House MD (Show)

Team Fortress 2

RanFren

Colors

Land Of The Lustrous

NomNomNami Games (Collectively)

Pressure (Roblox)

The Amazing Digital Circus (TADC)

The Coffin Of Andy And Leyley (TCOAAL)

Ic3speak (Band)

Baldurs Gate 3

Ensemble Stars / Enstars

Star Wars (Franchise)

Kirby (Franchise)

The Batfam

Tokyo Mew Mew

The Beatles

Osomatsu-san

Undertale AUs (generally)

Apps (like, on the phone)

Welcome Home

Dead Poets Society

Zero Day

Voices Of The World

ContentSMP (by DoctorR4t)

BigTop Burger (Show)

The Hunger Games

Doors (Roblox)

Percy Jackson

Shin Megami Tensei

Lucifer (Show)

[theminecraftbee]

fic masterpost

last updated: august 2024

note that this masterpost does not include tumblr-exclusive fics, because i write those as effectively "sketches"; they're practice and meant to be easy for me, so i deliberately don't 'take them seriously' enough to list them here. (also, there are probably over a hundred at this point.) you can find the tumblr exclusive fics in the tag 'a bee fic' if you're looking for them.

additionally: for ANY of my fics, you can always DM me to ask me to give you spoilers if the tags and summary do not give you enough information to decide if you want to read the fic or if the fic might contain one of your triggers. just let me know in a way i can respond privately, and i will give you that information!

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multichapter fics

this is about a stuffed bird, hermitcraft, T (warning: a bordeline M), 78k. in which an apocalypse happens that turns much of humanity into horrible monsters, mumbo gets a distressing call from grian and decides to travel across the country to meet him. still my most popular hermitcraft fic and my second-most popular fic overall. heavy on body horror, themes of what makes someone a person, and also evil x is here. i still love the mumbo voice in this, and it even has a complete podfic by quackingfish if you prefer audiobooks.

the continued adventures of the boatem road trip, hermitcraft, T, 28k. a series of events that take place as boatem is trapped in the void together for three months after big moon. originally written as a series of vaguely-connected oneshots on tumblr, gathered here into one place. the ending is a little abrupt, but if you're looking for something with the highest concentration of some of my favorite jokes i've made sitting right next to some good old cosmic horror, this is the fic for you.

the last days of the free angel of carrows, hermitcraft, T, 79k. the angel joe hills and the zombie cleo, owners of the atsign agency, investigate a strange mystery brought to them by pearl, and must save their city as they go. a noir-inspired urban fantasy i originally wrote for a big bang, and still my longest fic! it's got some of my favorite worldbuilding i've done, a great joe-and-cleo plot, a pearl i'm still obsessed with, and so much angel symbolism. if you like aus or urban fantasies, this is the one of my fics you should read.

solving counting sheep, evo, T, 78k. blade-three, living weapon of the watchers, is stolen by martyn after martyn finds its command words and taken home to jimmy to try to rehabilitate. what neither the property police or three itself know is that three is the ultimate fate of grian, their friend who they presumed dead. a fic that is very VERY much about identity and learning who you are, and also plays into many of my favorite living weapon and watcher!grian tropes--as well as subverts them in some heavy ways. probably one of the most personal fics i've ever written, as well. my understanding is that both people who like watcher!grian and people who hate it like this fic, which i take as praise.

the carriers, life series, M, 40k. PET mail (the group made up of Pearl, Etho, and Tango) are mail carriers after the zombie apocalypse, as well as asymptomatic carriers of the zombie virus. when cleo, a person from pearl's past, asks them to bring her a package, they go on a journey that barrels through all three of their pasts. this one is rated M for two specific reasons (both violence) but if you're chill with violence this one turned out pretty well! it is a very me take on a zombie apocalypse, what with the fact that the remnants of heavy industry are almost as much of a threat as the zombies, and a fic that leans pretty heavily on the double life soulmate pairs.

san luis, dream smp, T, 23k, perpetually unfinished. after the other three members of sbi die, philza tries to put back together the pieces. it would be easier if he wasn't hearing their ghosts. this is a fic i'm unfortunately unlikely to finish because it just makes me too sad to write after irl events, but it has some of my best handling of grief, and i know it brings some people comfort. if you don't mind me at my most unrelentingly sad, or are looking for that, i might still recommend it.

in deference to saint george, original superhero work, T, 42k. superhero superball, aka jack harlan, starts dating a customer he meets at the coffee shop he works at, while at the same time dealing with the attacks of the villain dragon and natural disasters. a hero/villain fic with a very ME kind of ending, i am still SUPER PROUD of this. i think the worldbuilding and characters work and it's my proof to myself i can write ow! also, if you've always wanted to read a superhero au from me, good news: this may not be an au, but it's very much exactly that.

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long oneshots

consequentialism, hermitcraft, M, 5k. as the members of boatem start falling in the boatem hole, their own dead bodies start showing up. peak "WOULD THAT BE FUCKED UP OR WHAT" horror from me, and also the first hermitcraft fic i ever wrote! if you like my horror writing and aren't too squeamish, good news: this exists.

to convey a certain brilliance, hermitcraft, T, 21k. joe hills and zombiecleo slowly, and through many death loops, drag their way out of their collapsed base to try to survive after a lunar apocalypse. this is the second hermitcraft fic i ever wrote and i wrote it before we knew how moon's big would end, inspired by super hostile; people still tell me it has some of their favorite joe characterization.

cura te ipsum, hermitcraft, T, 15k. tango, in a world where the hermatrix is canon, wakes up on-board the hermethius after dying to the moon and has to try to figure out how to cope. still one of my favorite oneshots i've written, full-stop, and the culmination of all my big moon emotions. it can be considered fully canon-compliant, and it's mostly about all the big emotions something like big moon would cause.

jevin's egg disaster, hermitcraft, G, 7k. the eggs from the season nine egg hunt turn into real children. chaos ensues. this is technically sorted into chapters, and written as a series of very short ficlets on tumblr originally. it doesn't really "conclude" as a result. however this is me on pure crackfic and contains my favorite joke i've ever made (it's in chapter 7 if you're wondering) so PLEASE read it if all the rest of my 'everyone talks about their big feelings' is causing you to need a laugh because it WILL make you laugh.

attempt thirty-three, hermitcraft, T, 14k. joe hills experiences the thirty-third loop of the time loop he's been stuck in, trying to save the world from the rift. a fic exploring the idea of "what happens in that middle part of the time loop when you've been there a while, but don't have things solved yet?" if you like joe hills and you also like hurt/comfort, this is very much a fic with both of those things, and some of my best with both of those things.

a thing that is thicker than starlight, hermitcraft, T, 13k. after reuniting on an adventure through space, long-lost siblings cleo and gem return home and try to figure out where they're supposed to fit into each other's lives. written for recursive exchange and based on "out to the galaxy steady she goes" by thedepressedcanary, although this fic stands on its own. it's a vaguely treasure planet-like au, but it's also MOSTLY about the trauma your parents leave you and the feeling of knowing you're supposed to care about someone (but don't know how to yet). this is my sibling feelings fic, read it for sibling feelings.

the inner mechanism of a black box, dream smp, T, 14k. techno is trapped, isolated, in a horrible version of the prison with only his voices for company. still my most popular fic, and also the fic of mine that is most describable as 'whump'. i still really love the techno writing in this one; it may be the first complete thing i posted to the account but it's still good. written before we knew anything about the prison, and so the situation is entirely speculative; also written before 'techno in prison' really became a genre. you can tell both of these things, for both good and ill.

revenant, dream smp, M, 11k. jack manifold descends back into hell in order to drag tommy back up and out with him. written in a fugue state during the like, three days tommy was still dead. jack manifold is way cooler than he deserves in this fic (he is also EXACTLY as cool as he deserves). to be honest i don't remember why i rated this one M, but not stuffed bird? if you can read stuffed bird you can almost certainly read this. has some of my cooler weird formatting decisions in it and a WAY COOLER VERSION OF HELL THAN THE DSMP GAVE US I'LL STAND BY THAT.

bad beat, dream smp, T, 10k. techno goes to play a high-stakes game of poker against quackity, hoping to win insurance for his friends' lives. do you like card games? i like card games. most of this fic is a thriller in which they are playing poker. both people who like and dislike poker like this fic, though, because the thriller elements still work. also, my one take on casino quackity, so if you like quackity, give it a shot.

a kind of playing heartstrings, empires smp, G, 6k. jimmy invites scott to a cod empire gathering. an older fic of mine that's a cute take on empires flower husbands with a LOT of music culture worldbuilding for the codlands! this is just a fic that makes me feel cozy and happy. it is uncomplicated fluff.

survivorship bias, empires smp, G, 9k. an amnesiac jimmy is fished out of the water and into a surviving village that exists a few decades after the rapture, but still a great deal of time before empires season two will happen. a combination of worldbuilding of that transition period and emotions about jimmy, who doesn't remember why he's sad but certainly feels it. i enjoyed meshing different empires cultures together for this a lot!

the perils of updating your vault hunters server before even the public release (seriously who qa checks this), vault hunters smp, G, 9k. in which a bug on the vault hunters server turns all of iskall's friends into cute small children and he has to get them out of a vault again. this one is just an excuse for me to write endless Cute Baby Shenanigans, and if Cute Baby Shenanigans sound like they're your kind of thing, give it a read!

it's a long way down if you want to get up again, yugioh dm, T, 12k. mokuba tries to puzzle out why his brother is acting so strangely; as it turns out, this is because kaiba has recently time traveled. a fic shoving DSoD kaiba into the earliest parts of yugioh. he is very bad as a time traveler, and he's not necessarily making things better, but they aren't necessarily worse. also, a fic with a lot of my feelings about mokuba and seto's relationship, as well as their relationship with gozaburo. the kaibas will always make me feel things.

on burdens, yugioh dm, T, 11k. kaiba realizes that jounouchi is both more complicated than he gave him credit for and probably being abused, which changes his perspective on him. violetshipping, but mostly pre-violetshipping. another fic where i write people playing a card game! it is also as much about kaiba having the world's worst emotional intelligence as it is about kaiba and jounouchi both having shitty dads.

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selected short oneshots

a question for the dead, life series, G, 1.2k. a script-format fic interviewing the dead players of last life. one of my favorite experiments with formatting of all time, line after line of character study with no wasted words. read it.

different sort of soulmates, life series, G, 926. an aromantic mumbo jumbo hears about double life after the fact, and talks through with grian his fears that he wouldn't have been capable of having a soulmate. cute grumbo friendship and also some feelings about feeling disconnected from the people around you. a personal favorite ficlet of mine.

the long odds, life series, G, 1.8k. martyn is invited to the table with the other writers to play a game. a very meta fic in which martyn plays blackjack with watchers and listeners. this fic is like 80% metafiction and allegory by weight, and i like it very much.

a murder, life series, G, 483. before limited life, jimmy and joel realize it's coming via a flock of birds on empires. a fic both with jimmy and joel's unique friendship and a meta twist on the whole canary thing.

task: answer the following question: do you believe in curses?, life series, G, 1.2k. the surviving members of secret life explain their thoughts on curses. a spiritual successor to 'a question for the dead' and another one of my absolute favorite experiments with formatting. another one with no wasted words that hinges on the character voice of it all.

home, life series, G, 887. cleo and etho have a conversation about their new relationship after secret life, given that cleo's aromantic. man, i love cletho so much, and i also really like the idea of aromantic cleo, so this is my ficlet with both of those things.

do you even lift, bro?, hermitcraft, G, 2.4k. boatem fluff about who can bench press the most members of boatem. this fic is still really cute tbh, not much else to say.

like father, hermitcraft, T, 2k. grumbot prime decides he has to protect grian the same way grian protected grumbot in another world. the horror of being trapped by something you can't escape in a box designed to stop you from hurting yourself; also, the horror of your mistakes coming to haunt you.

forgetful, hermitcraft, T, 977. an interaction between evil x and xisuma near the end of season eight. a ficlet exploring some of my feelings about how season eight evil x can very easily be read as abusive and not even xisuma ever seems to acknowledge that. also, the horror of admin powers in minecraft.

to spite your face, hermitcraft, T, 980. a ficlet where joe gets to be mad about how he was treated by hermitopia during the crossover. i just think i still have so many crossover feelings about joe hills on empires, that's all.

as what you make becomes you, hermitcraft, T, 3.2k. decked out consumes tango, as seen from three perspectives. technically three separate oneshots collected into one fic as one story, the idea of decked out 2 'eating' tango is one of my favorite horror concepts from season 9. this is my execution of it.

missed the shovel talk so this is the next best thing, hermitcraft, T, 941. the rest of the NHO throws a party for doc and then interrogates him about when he even got married to ren in the first place. a goofy, funny fic about the hermits hanging out and being friends. this one is mostly jokes, but i think they're very funny jokes.

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i also have a number of other 'shorter' oneshots that aren't included here for the sake of the length of the post. to find all of my fics, including those left out of this masterpost, check my ao3! and, as suggested above, browse the 'a bee fic' tag on tumblr to find a collection of everything i've written, including things i either haven't yet transferred to ao3 or will not transfer there.

i hope you enjoy my writing!

[itsgirlcraft]

Welcome to the masterpost of all [256] of my FavreMySabre AUs/OCs/concepts :]

Feel free to ask questions or just give me a number between 1 and [256]! Or directly ask CWK!Sabre or MCRP!Time for what something means, navigation (i.e., genres, specific characters), or just questions on the multiverse these all belong to!

264 AUs. 256 AUs w/o dsmp, 186 w/o dreams (or dsmp). 8 dsmp-exclusive AUs were included here, I apologize.

Edit: at the bottom of the main list ID, will be a "changelog," where I put additional AUs that I didn't have in the og list. Once a page has been filled, there will be a new picture of it and a proper ID like the original pages.

That way, nothing gets confused. Also, the AU number will change as needed. AU names will most likely stay the same, and if they do change, I will include the og in the changelog.

Under the cut is the digitalized list/"ID"!

I got this done sooner than I thought tbh. Had to go thru my old tablet, my art binders, and all my notes on my phone. Worth it, this is SO USEFUL, my god!

FavreMySabre AUs/OCs List

drm = dream, OC = original character.

2019 era = 2019 and 2020, 2021 era =2021 and 2022, 2023 era = 2023 and 2024.

Oldest AUs (Wattpad, tablet, 2019 era) 62 AUs

•On The Run •Lost In A Fairytale •The Black Hole •Wings And Horns •Ore Steves (OCs) •Call Of The Void •Infected •The Nether Prince •Halloween With The Steves •Steve Saga High •I Don't Know How To Rule! •Future Legends •Altered Realities •Power Switch •Underwater • Not You. Anyone But You. •Why?! •Black Hole Steve (OC) •Family Secret •Undead Me •Fairies •Mirror World •Metal/Magnet (ocs) •The Cursed •Chicken Dad •Containment Breach・Wolf Boy •Vampocalypse •The Night Shift •Covid-19 •Broken Reality •Seven Square Chickens. One Adult. •Demons In My Head •Reverse Evil •Anti-Brine •Genderbent Royalty •Error 404: Steve Not Found (oc/drm) •Chemical AU/2.0 •Confusion •Gender Swap •Earth Portal •Rainbow City •A Glitch In The Matrix •SCP AU •Lost And Broken Soul/Cursed With knowledge •Wisps •Did We Meet Before •Darkest Quest For Peace •Learning The Ways Of The Multiverse •Trapped Crossover •When Three Worlds Meet •The Olympian Saga • Dragon (oc) •Dream SMP Meets Steve Saga:Therapy Edition •Moth (oc) •The Haunting Saga •OG Body Horror AU •Different Artstyle •That One Trapped/Steve Saga Crossover •Storm Steve (oc) •The Weirdest Adventure •Failed_Rainbow_Steve (oc)

Old AUs (2021 era) 48 AUs w/o DSMP

DSMP: •Minepocalypse •The Shapeshifters •The Meet-Up •The Streamers/Hunt •Guardian Of The Forest •The Game (drm) •Trapped In Minecraft But We're Stuck Together •The Monsters In The Cages Look A Lot Like Me

•The Obligatory Reversed Role AU But Optimistic (Steve Saga Roleswap) •DSMP/SS Oneshot •Squinkies Are Taking Over My Life •Time Travel AUs •Fantasy AU ft. Chicken And Horse •Hybrid Boys •A Dance With A Devil •That *One* Prophecy •Fading Humanity •Creatures In The Woods •Experiment Shadow •A Human In A Supernatural World •RQ ODAA •One Disaster After Another • Universe fusions (ocs) •Discolored And Disoriented •Language Barrier •BodySwap •Elements Of Family Magic •The Creation God's Puppets •Crash-Landing Aliens AU •RQ: Security Breach •Follow Me/Robot Soul •Uno Reverse, Fate! •Weapon AU •IRL Twisted Rainbow •Robots, Hybrids, And Experimental Friendships •Seldistynell (OC) •My Life As A Feathered Monster Hiding At A Human College •The Aliens Inside My Computer •The Five Elements •Monster Under Your Bed/Rescue Mission •Lab Monsters •Little Nightmares Crossovers •Monster House In Zombie Land •A Colorful World •Human Machine •Taking It Literally •Digital Magic •FRS' Childhood (oc) • Ancient Aliens • Demon AU •Anime AU • Nightmare Princess •A Rainbow Of Identities

Newer AUS (2023 era) 75 AUs

•Dark Matter/Wilted Lily/Ultra Chaos/ Corruption (ocs) •RQ Plague •Cave Monsters •SSO Color kids (ocs) •SHSF No Evil •The Owl House Crossover •SlenderSabre •Reverse Quest (Rainbow Quest Roleswap) •Wise Anger (ocs) •Blindfold-centric AU Collection •Blindfold Of Skin •Gacha DJ •RQ/TR MLP Crossovers • Naga!Plague •NPCs/Thing (drm) •SS Bodyswap AU •ColorSwap Horrors •TR Roleswap •SL Roleswap •Desk Dolls •AGITM x Trapped •TR Weirdcore •Become Food •ZWV Hybrid (drm) •Half-Fused TR •RealityElan •MCRP •"B" The Elf-Eared (oc/drm) • Jellyfish!Twisted •Human!Galaxy (drm) •Halloween TR •Alien!Sabre •Vent AU •Crystal Swap •Gacha Weirdcore •SBI x dragon!Sabre •WTWM Bad End •Catboy!Sabre •Color Change!Reverse •TFC!Elan •SkeleModern (drm) • Urban Legends •WTF!Sabre •Migraine AU •Dot Eyes •Haunted Dolls •Relationship Problems •Uncanny Alien •Planetheads •Potato/Carrot (ocs) •AR x RQ •Changing With My Imagination •Center Of The Freakshow •Eldritch POVs • RQ x SL •Happy Place Hub •TR x Nimona •One Last Chance Before Our Demise •Warforged •Hello Puppets •Reformed Villains •Imprisoning Infection •Apocalypse Survivors •Sky Voices •TR Elite's Return •RQ Roleswap x TR •Star-Rats •Diamond Mafia •God Application •Earthly War Crimes (ocs) •Would You Love Me If I Was A Worm (drm) •FMS x DSMP •Alien Or Human? (drm) • Shadow Child (drm) •An Angel's Death Wish (drm)

Dream-Based AUs/Concepts (76 AUs)

•Generic Simpsons Crossover •Medieval Simpsons Gore •Steve Summer Camp •Desert House •Me/Sabre As Mike Afton •Gx/Vd IRL •Flooded World •SS!NM/TFTSMP!Karl •SS/RQ Monster AU •How Isn't This A Nightmare •Twisted Parkour •New Steves ft. Ranboo (ocs) •Girl Posse VS. Steves •Branch Legs •Lava Rainbow •Music Video ft. Grandmas •The Red Eyes (ocs) •RQ x OSMP Ft. Various Demon Cats • Shapeshifting Imagination •Fix Before • Abandoned Mall •Guardian Is Ripped AF •The Dead Kings •Dungeon Crawler •Ruined City ft. SBI •Girl Fight ft. Eldritch Abomination (oc) •Weird Alien Carrot •I'm Colle •Dolls w/ Reds •Befriend VR Sabre •Interview Show •Crafting Dead •TR Planet •Sideways Void •Trapped Sequel •Become Dragon •Failed 7 Colors •Contact Via MP3 Player •Tricolor Jester/Apocalypse (oc) •LOTB Chicken •Steves At Mall •Haunted Mushrooms •WTF Emily (oc) •Prof. Red In Costco •Companion Adventure • Camping Race •Board Game •Psychiatrist/Colle's Ghost •Pathetic Baby Bord •Figurines/Power Levels •Cosplay/Basketball •Fruits •Camping w/ Origin •Dystopia Costco •TR Elite IRL• Rock Concert •Deku Floating Gloves •Dark Sun •I'm TR Assistant •Steve Comm Post (Normal) •Necromancer/Kirishima •Unrecognizable •Cashiers •Bad Intentions •Catnap/ATLA/SpongeBob •MLP/Jesus/OCs •Whirlpool Facecam •Barbie Dolls •Bedroom Balancer (oc) •Sps Sabre Sci-Fi Movie •Fake Blue On Earth •Gen Loss Implied •Genderswamp (oc) •Steven Universe/MHA/Steves At ComicCon •Seer/Colle/SS Galaxy Classmates •Steve Saga Mobile Game

Changelog 10/7/24:

<Added 3 AUs> •Apocalypse Alien (drm) •Time and Elemental's Adventure (drm) •Keep The Memories Alive (ocs)

<Changed 2 AU names> Cryptid Sabre->Cave Monsters, Tired Eyes->Blindfold-centric AU Collection.

[katescribblesabit]

oh origins smp, sometimes i really miss you

just wanted to draw enderian princess being comforted by little bug man after reading the two oneshots of tallest boi and the smallest boi on Ao3 by Universal_doggo

background is ass, i didnt wanted to draw it uff

[bleue-flora]

lol yeah this was the chapter that was originally gonna be just a oneshot before it became a whole fic.

"Isn’t he supposed to be at least mildly happy that he giftwrapped Quackity and delivered revenge right to his doorstep?" 

Did someone say Christmas in July?... awww staged duo are so wholesome. ;]

[garbageonion]

fuck it i'm promoting my fics

an origins smp hybrid/lab au where tommy is saved from a laboratory by the sbi, who quickly realize he has a massive case of stockholm syndrome and will need a lot of help to unlearn all the brainwashing and abuse he was put through. ongoing, currently at 14 chapters and 55k words

a royalty/fantasy au where prince fundy and his friends tommy and tubbo go on a roadtrip to save ranboo, who has been kidnapped by a shady prince and his even shadier bodyguard (skeppy and bad). ongoing, currently at 5 chapters and 28.3k words

a post-canon dsmp fic where wilbur meets fundy again a decade after he witnessed him taking his second canon life. my attempt of giving them an ending that's at least a bit more hopeful than canon. oneshot, 6.3k words

and something a bit more experimental: a las nevadas-era dsmp fic where wilbur comes to meet his son after his resurrection, with two versions of the same fic: fundy's pov and wilbur's pov

i also have a couple of multichapters that are both currently at 1 chapter and at an indefinite hiatus: a crimeboys mer au and a crimeboys pirate/royalty au both of which i'm planning to continue once i have the time and energy

[qsmpficsarchive]

Bésame y Ahógame by miriical

Oneshot | M | 3,497

Blood and Gore | Vivisection | Making Out | Cannibalism

Despite his various forays into dismemberment and mutilation, Cellbit had never been on the receiving end. It wasn't even supposed to go this far originally, but, well. Things happen. Things such as Roier looking so pretty straddling his lap and his claws digging into Cellbit's side, blood rising up through his fingers. Things such as a hand wrapped around his throat, and lips pressed against his. Who was Cellbit to say no?

[bunzy]

DOES ANYONE WANT TO SEE A THIRD LIFE/DOUBLE LIFE SHORT LITTLE ANGSTY ONESHOT I WROTE ON A TRAIN RIDE BECAUSE YOU’RE GETTING IT ANYWAYS!!!

Characters: Grian, Scar, mentioned Ren, mentioned Martyn, mentioned BigB

Fandoms: Third Life SMP, Double Life SMP

When a bird is threatened, they puff up their wing feathers to make themselves appear larger.

————

“Why do you always do that?” Scar asked.

“Do what?” Grian responded.

“Whenever Ren or Martyn, or any of Dogwarts or the Crastle are around, you always puff up your wings.”

“Oh.” Grian flushed slightly. “It’s a bird thing.”

“Tell me!!” Scar pestered.

“Well, whenever a bird is feeling threatened, it puffs up its wings to appear larger to predators. I didn’t even realize I was doing it, actually.”

“Awww,” Scar cooed. “Is the little birdie afraid of the Big Bad Wolf?”

“Shut up!” Grian shoved him, the wings on his head curling in front of his eyes in an attempt to hide his blushing face. “It’s just an instinctual thing!”

“Alright,” replied Scar, sounding conceited. “But…” He hesitated. “You never fluff them up around me…?”

Grian blushed harder, face turning red. “I… I guess my instincts don’t see you as a predator…” he replied, muffling his face in his sleeve.

“R-really?” Scar asked. “I mean, I’m red and all, and you aren’t allowed to attack me unless to defend your-“

Grian cut him off by taking his hand in his own. “Scar. Look at me.”

Scar obliged, lifting his head to stare at Grian, red eyes meeting green.

“I trust you Scar. More than anyone else. I know you would never hurt me or lie to me, and I would never do anything to you either. I trust you.”

Scar stuttered a meager protest but was cut off by Grian repeating himself once more.

“I trust you Scar. My instincts trust you. I will always love you, and I will always trust you because I know that I will not betray you, and you will not betray me.”

Scar smiled as he looked back up at Grian, their eyes meeting, red on green.

————

Yellow eyes met yellow as Scar looked up at Grian, smiling a false smile that Grian had only ever seen pointed at enemies.

“Wait how did you get these cookies?” Grian asked, glancing down at the treats in his hand. A few feathers pointed slightly out of place and wings raised so slightly that Scar almost couldn’t tell. Anyone else would not have noticed the small tells, but Scar and Grian knew everything about each other, from long nights of smiles and wing preening and sand and untold secrets that became told in each others’ embrace.

“I made 'em,” Scar replied. "They're for your secret soulmate."

Grian startled, a small blink that was almost imperceptible. His wings puffed up to much larger than their original size, his head wings curling slightly in front of his face as if to make it so Scar couldn’t see his eyes subtly glance towards the door.

“I don't know what you're talking about.”

I tried to make as many parallels between the two parts, and you should be able to see them all. I spent way too long on this, and also looked up the words they actually said during the secret soulmate scene. Anyways, I'm really proud of this!!

[phosphorus-noodles]

PHO WRITING JUMPSCARE no it's not the fic i keep talking about i got distracted and found this old oneshot instead 😔

only reason i'm posting it now is because i found an old drawing that i wanted to post but it needed the oneshot for context /lh

shoutout to me and my discord husband three years ago writing about 3rd life flower husbands with the origins mod, we were cooking fr <3

[saltyr3mix]

have I ever told you that second chances had multiple test concepts?

before I decided on empires, I considered Stardew Valley because the original idea for this was an ask game where you put the last character you drew in the last game you played and I thought he would vibe :D

Then, when I decided on empires, I considered making him a ghost in a cursed pendant that llama Owen picked up! The story would have been about him trying to get brought back so he could continue his massacres but being worn down by llama Owen’s stupid antics lol

NO YOU DIDN'T

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

THOSE IDEAS ARE SO SO SO FUN!!!!

I neeeeeeeeeeeed more outsiders x other servers fixing them fics. There was this one fic where they took outsiders and fused it with the maze runner and it was amazing. and like i ADORE ADORE ADORE LOVE ABSOLUTELY FAWN OVER YOUR FIC OF COURSE!!

Cause i love taking messed up characters and sending them on the most painfully complicated fix it arcs. Its literately the plot of both These walls scream your name and Played my game now you're in it. OH! and my new secret wtdw fic only Danger knows about that i wont share for a while. (im going to wait till i have a few chapters before hand ready to post so i don't get behind on it like all my other fics lol.)

ANYWAY

I've also been tossing around more combinations for this kind of au. taking outsiders and putting them in places they shouldn't be. and here are some of the ones i've nearly written but just don't have the time for.

O!Krow in Newlife. just, it's reaction to sparrow would be so funny and also the angst potential in death and hybridizing Krow even further. Also there is one opening to one of the NL episodes where Krow does a Japanese voice over intro that catches me off guard every time i hear it.

O!Bek in SOS smp. Look. Scott, Eloise, and Owen are there but my girl is missing and that makes me just a little bit sad that they can't reach their full chaos potential. its more so to fix them than her at this point. but i also think it would to see O!Bek specifically try to adjust to it all cause shes isn't a big......team player..... to say the least. Which is something that smp relay on big time.

O!Magic on Pirates. i think she deserves a gun. and to kill people. and also think she would be a great apprentice for P!Gracie and would be besties with cruppy. this is less of a lore heavy one and more i just want her safe and happy and also to kill whomever she so desires because she deserves it after everything.

On a similar note on sending people place for the sole sake of letting them kill people, i think sending O!Oeca to the traffic series would just. just think about it. they were made for each other. and you know what. Put O!Mowhee there with him. Just the two of them running around on red just. i don't know man. i think its very fun and that they would thrive.

O!Squidney and O!Spidey i firmly believe should have the pleasure of being in Rats. Just as a treat. just so they can be silly and forget the horrors.

Anyway those were plans i had for another super big grand fic where every outsider got put somewhere new and each chapter centered around them healing. but i quickly realized that's way too big of a project to take on right now and also i don't know enough about servers or enough about every outsider for that.

Hope you like the little exchange in ideas!!! I do really like yours and i have so many i couldn't help but spill some of my own!

(i also may have another little idea for a oneshot sort of inspired by your fic, if i get around to having the free time to write it and you allow inspiration)

[antimony-medusa]

Ao3 Wrapped

I like numbers so here I am delving into my works again!

__

Overall stats for 2023!

User Subscriptions: 164

Kudos: 4,786

Comment Threads: 695

Bookmarks: 1,308

Subscriptions: 288

Word Count: 198,621

Hits: 30,820

That's an increase in everything except subscriptions, I had a good year. It was the year of many smaller fics, mostly, with just a few longfics.

I am particularly touched that user subscription count, that people want to stick around to see everything I wrote, especially as I broke into a new fandom this year and did some Original Work. Thank you all for coming along for the ride!

Fun Stats:

Fics Published: 31, including four on anon, for 198,621 words

Number of One-Shots: 28— I went pretty hard into exchange this year, and that encourages oneshots. I only wrote one multichapter for a bang, one for an event, and finished one ongoing from last year. Of all of those however only 2 were under a thousand words, so I did less sort of treats and drabbles than I did last year.

Number of Multi-Chapters: 3, 4 if you count the one that's still sitting at one chapter that I might continue someday. Ulp. Okay so the good news is all of those multichapters are finished, but the bad news is I still have multiple ongoings from the previous year that are just languishing. Did I mention I went hard into exchanges this year?

Number of Inspired Works: 3, two of which were because I participated in challenges where everybody writes a fic inspired by the one in front of them in the chain! And also Droid wrote me an excellent phandom shubbleandwilbur fic. :D

Longest Fic: Freaking Out In The Middle Of The Street (With The Complete Conviction Of Someone Who Has Never Had Anything Actually Really Bad Happen To Them) (28,369 words), my silly worldbuilding nonsense multichapter, but I started that one the year before, so if we only consider the ones I did entirely this year that would be my bang fic, A Hundred Things You Have Not Dreamed Of  (27,743 words). I had a lot of fun with dehumanized human weapon recovery with that one.

Shortest Fic: Taking A Break (335 words), basically an overgrown drabble that I wrote on tumblr when people were challenging me to write anything as a QPR. Soley put on tumblr to help boost up a relationship tag (misskristin/missa/philza).

Most Kudosed Fic: Twenty Minutes After The Family Dynamic is Forcibly Assigned By The Government , at a staggering 568 kudos for a fic that isn't even a thousand words, which is just proof that if you write something while the kettle boils at the exact moment that a fandom is exploding and it makes it to the top of the tag, it can stay up there for a while. People are STILL reading and kudosing that one and I don't even know how they find it.

Most Viewed Fic: Freaking Out In The Middle Of The Street (With The Complete Conviction Of Someone Who Has Never Had Anything Actually Really Bad Happen To Them) , at 3,629 hits! However, 1,528 of that is from last year, so really the hits for this year are only 2,101, so my top hits is A Hundred Things You Have Not Dreamed Of , 2,990 hits. and that is 100% the power of being a daily-updating multi-chapter, the hits on that one exploded for that reason. But the hits on multichapters are always higher.

Most Subscribed Fic: Freaking Out In The Middle Of The Street (With The Complete Conviction Of Someone Who Has Never Had Anything Actually Really Bad Happen To Them)  again! 87 Subscriptions! But a full 76 of them are from last year, so we're back at A Hundred Things You Have Not Dreamed Of, with 49 subs.

Most Bookmarked Fic: Look it's Freaking Out In The Middle Of The Street (With The Complete Conviction Of Someone Who Has Never Had Anything Actually Really Bad Happen To Them)  again 122 bookmarks, But 58 of those were from last year, so. Again. Different fic— and it's Twenty Minutes After The Family Dynamic is Forcibly Assigned By The Government tied with an anon fic, with 117 bookmarks.

Most Used Fandom: Dream SMP with 12 fics, but QSMP is coming up fast with 7 fics!

Least Used Fandom: That is the Internet & Social Media (Anthropomorphic), with one fic! Let's fucking go for Yuletide assignments!

Most Used Rating: Teen, 23 fics

Least Used Rating: Gen, 2 fics, and Mature, 2 fics

Most Written Relationship: Technoblade & Phil Watson | Philza, 9 fics. This is down from 10 last year. I'm falling off.

Most Used Additional Tag: Guys, don't make fun of me, but it's Food. Beating out Fluff this year. I know I keep writing about food. I KNOW. I will get more original beats next year.

Most Frequently Used Characters: 

Philza (21)

Technoblade (11)

Ángel Missael Castañeda Vega | MissaSinfonia (4)

Chayanne (QSMP) (4)

Ranboo (Video Blogging RPF) (3)

Niki | Nihachu (2)

Toby Smith | Tubbo (2)

Tumblr (Anthropomorphic) (1)

Reddit (Anthropomorphic) (1)

DID TOMMY SERIOUSLY NOT MAKE THE LIST? Wow, tide change. Anyways, it was a fun year. Here's to more next year!

Last Year's Stats

[minecraftbookshelf]

The LiveAndLetRain Master-Master Post

Because tumblr search function is notoriously unreliable, to the point im struggling to find my own things when i want them for reference so im making this, mostly for myself but if you want to use it go for it!

That being said, my tag for my original posts is #rain rambles

I tag all the Technoblade memorial art I reblog with #technoblade never dies (specifically the memorial-vibes art, so this is a bit subjective but just a heads up if this is something you want to avoid)

I am on AO3

This is my pinned post on my main which is an index of all my fandom specific sideblogs

MASTER POSTS:

The AU In Which All the Marriages Are Arranged/Marriage of State AU Empires SMP Season 1 AU featuring fantasy agricultural economics and linguistics and arranged marriages that cover the full romantic-platonic spectrum. This is my major project, currently. Everything relating to it an be found under the tag #marriage of state au and the master post has important posts, fics, art, and organizational tags linked on it.

Avatar: The Legend of Jimmy Group discussion and brainstorming post that has spawned at least one au, and some fic and art

FANFICTION:

Adventures in Grian-Napping (Life Series Urban Fantasy AU based off of Grian’s LimLife AFK Episode) COMPLETE - Tumblr || AO3

Limited Life Oneshots - Tumblr 1 2 3 || AO3

The Elements of an Inter-Dimensional Prison Break (Life Series & Evolution SMP AU taking place overlapping and at the end of Limited Life) WIP - Tumblr Part 1 Part 2 || AO3 || Summarized [Currently in stasis while i rework it and revamp it]

To Walk A Mile In Each Others Shoes (My take on the concept of Double Life soulbond pairs sharing physical traits and abilities over the bond) COMPLETE - Team Ranchers || Team Box || Dessert Duo || The Boat Boys || The Homewreckers || Bad Math || Tilly Death Do Us Part || AO3

Gone Fishing (Life Series Urban Fantasy AU ft. Gaslight, Gatekeep, Girlboss + Martyn. Oneshot) COMPLETE - Tumblr || AO3

Flip-Flopped Hermits (ficlets written for the hermit fanon swap prompt meme) STANDALONE COLLECTION, WIP - AO3 || Tumblr - Hypno & Stress Cub & xB and Pearl & Mumbo (bonus Grian) Gem & Impulse Etho & Bdubs

Marriage of State AU Series WIP - AO3 || Tumblr links in the AU masterpost

After the End (SOS SMP post-finale ficlet ft. fWhip and Joey. Two alternate endings, I recommend reading the second one first) COMPLETE - AO3 || Tumblr Ending 1 Ending 2

LIFE SERIES (and overlap) META & THINKY THOUGHTS:

Concerning Patterns Out of Context Snippet from Future Fanfiction Shortform 3rd Life Ren & Joel Compare/Contrast Repeating Patterns: Smajor, Ren, & Martyn 3rd & Last Life Ethoslab & LDshadowlady Final Death Scars || The Diagrams Thereof: TAG FOR THE UPDATED VERSIONS The original posts: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Martyn's Betrayal Watcher Lore Meets Hermitcraft Recap Rain Judges the Watchers for Feeding Inefficiently Middle Child Jimmy Solidarity Evolution/Life Family Tree & Relationship Web (Updated version at the bottom of the post) Falling Birbs This one messed up my notifications inbox for like two days and it is specifically inthelittlewoods fault Life Series Wing Headcanons 3rd Life Flower Husbands: Fated Tragedy Scott Smajor Has Been Spiting the Watchers Since Third Life The Ship Burns Everything Burns The More Things Change The More They Stay The Same

RANDOM BITS AND BOBS:

Life Series Lore/Bit Poll OG Edition (Season Specific Follow-up Coming Soon!) Watercolor Sniffer Skizzleman Skizzleman Does Whatever A Skizzle Can The True Potential of Empires S1: Scott and Gem's kidnapping MCYT Wings: Grian || Jimmy Solidarity || Pearlescentmoon || Philza || Hannahxxrose || Geminitay (not wings but close enough) Mumbo Jumbo was the EvoSMP Escape Plan All Along Empires S2 White Collar AU For the Poor? My Most Correct MCC Opinion The Price of Being Birb

[probably-ace-ok]

Unusual or Unique Crossovers

A small collection of fanfictions that either crossover pieces of media that are completely different, or does so in an interesting and unique way. Many are unfinished or seemingly abandoned, but I think they’re worth checking out anyway.

stand in the ashes (ask the ghosts)

My Hero Academia/Mass Effect

Izuku transported to Mass Effect universe before meeting All Might, gets adopted by Shepard. In progress.

Ghost's space adventures.

Hollow Knight/Mass Effect

Ghost gets sent to the Mass Effect universe and is pretty OP. Complete.

Diamond in the Rough

Steven Universe/Worm

Post-Future Steven gets transported to the grimdark superpower setting of Worm. In progress.

Child of the Sun (or, The Return of the Avatar)

Star Wars/Avatar: The Last Airbender

The Force stops working normally, and everyone who uses it becomes a bender instead. The Jedi Council does not approve. In progress.

Tilly Death Do Us Part

Double Life SMP/Attack on Titan

Minecraft players get accidentally sent into Attack on Titan… but can still use the Minecraft mechanics. In progress.

A Tale of Spirits

Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles/Avatar: The Last Airbender

The turtles get send into the AtLA world and are mistaken for spirits due to their appearances and abilities. In progress.

see you in the dark

The Disastrous Life of Saiki K./Worm

Saiki gets sent to Brockton Bay and complains about not being in a comedy show anymore. In progress but hasn’t updated since 2021.

Stacked Deck (Or, Colin Wallis vs. Single Parenting)

Persona 4/Worm

Armsmaster has to deal with his brothers wife’s nephew being suddenly dumped on him. Yu has to deal with his uncle being a humanoid cactus. Also superpowers. In progress but hasn’t been updated since 2018.

Pray For the Children You Lost Along the Way

Miraculous Ladybug/Silent Hill

I actually haven’t read this one, although it got into my bookmarks at some point, but I’m putting it on the list for that crossover alone. In progress but hasn’t been updated since 2019.

Magic, not materia

Final Fantasy VII/Harry Potter

Was a bit hesitant about adding a HP fic to this list, but from what I remember, this fic respects HP about as much as I do — that is to say, not at all. Cloud shows up and stabs the Basilisk during Chamber of Secrets. In progress, last updated in 2021.

Once Again

Naruto/Gravity Falls

Mabel is reincarnated as Sasuke Uchiha, and that’s really all you need to know. In progress, hasn’t updated since 2019.

The Addams Family Thief

Persona 5/The Addams Family

Akechi gets adopted by the Addams family and fits in quite well. Complete.

All That Glitters Must Be A Rock

Kingdom Hearts/Steven Universe

Only a crossover in the loosest sense of the word, this fic is set in a world where people from the Destiny Islands are similar to Gems. Effectively complete.

More Than One Hero

My Hero Academia/The Legend of Zelda

Bakugou is a Link, and that changes everything. In progress, hasn’t been updated since 2018.

it's dangerous to go alone

Majora’s Mask/Undertale

Link falls into the Underground and meets Chara. Oneshot.

in the shadows of history (is where we roam)

Little Nightmares/Pokémon: Legends Arceus

Six is going to kill Arceus — and possibly eat what’s left. In progress, last updated in late 2022.

Revival

Batman/Attack on Titan

Eren Yeager in Gotham, what will he do? Adopt a child and befriend the local murderous vigilante apparently. In progress.

The Wheatley Parable

Portal 2/The Stanley Parable

Wheatley feels bad about what happened with Chell, but then he gets a second chance. Things go wrong immediately. In progress, hasn’t updated since late 2022.

Teen Titans: Morph

Teen Titans (2003)/Animorphs

Earth has been invaded by mind-controlling aliens, and the Teen Titans are some of the few heroes who know about it — along with the original Animorphs of course. Also, Starfire has a secret friend. Technically unfinished but satisfying to read anyway, hasn’t updated since 2014.

The Odd Duo of Blue and Pink

Persona 5/Kirby

Kirby and Meta Knight are reincarnated as humans in the Tokyo of Persona 5. In progress, hasn’t updated since 2019.