#or when hes very first waking up and ive been up hell nuzzle into my chest drifting in and out of sleep

[domesticated-whores]

can't be trusted to say something sexy and cute because last night I was cuddling with my man and I went "hey, you're like the same width as my cat!!!"

[amoristt]

Grazing the Fire | IV

well hello. here i am, four years later, once again enamored with nathan enough to finally dust this baby off and pick up where i left it. im a little rusty so bear with me this chapter! much more to come <3

reblogs + tags and replies will make my entire day as i put a lot of effort into this :)! it also helps motivate me!

story continues beneath the read more. let me know if you can’t access it!

Warning: language, very vague s/a mentions

want to support me? heres my kofi!

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“Alright class, who can tell me,” A board stick clacks against the chalkboard. “Who can answer problem four?” 

A few hands raise in the corners of your eye, but yours remains atop your desk. Eyes far away, mind in a murky haze and almost completely unaware. All you could focus on were the memories playing on repeat within the confines of your tired, tired brain. Hours ago, you were warm, you were comfortable. Safe.

Cheeks heated to a dusting blush when you remind yourself just how you had awoken that morning. At some point in the night, an angel had blessed you. Allowed you to wake up wrapped around none other than big, bad, Nathan Prescott. Your face nuzzled into his chest, broad but wiry hands pressed firmly over your shoulder and his arm slung over your waist to keep you against him. Thankfully you had been the first to wake up, blinking away the morning sun blazing through his blinds and painting the room stripes of gold. At that moment, before your headache came crashing down onto your skull, you were astounded by him. 

Eye lashes brushing the top of his cheeks, his lips parted ever so slightly, chest rising and falling rhythmically. In that moment, there was no anger, no bitterness. Just a soft and peaceful slumber. It was like being the sole viewer of a magnificent painting- each stroke and detail placed just there just for you to pick out, to remember the curves and sharp edges down to the very foundation. From his unkempt hair down to the way his hand flattened onto the mattress where your indent still lived. Nathan was so beautiful like this. 

For a long time you stayed there. It was as though you were afraid to move- you couldn’t bear to disturb him. You had wondered, if he was always like this, so at peace, what would he be like? Likely soft voiced, mild mannered. He’d do his school assignments without hassle and donate to the charity board. He would wander the town with his friends and listen to music in a beat up truck flying down the stretch of highway overlooking the bold, blue, and beautiful ocean. An entirely different version of himself- carefree, and a fair blue as opposed to a burning flame of red. 

But, if that were the case, you’d never have gotten here. You’d never been both the outsider, and the only seeing eye. A lucky, albeit firstly unwilling witness to the display of depth before you. 

It never hit you like it had quite in that moment how lucky you were.

But- just then- an alarm disturbed what serendipity existed. You nearly leapt out of your skin, clutched your hands to your chest at the sudden sound. A headache wove its way into your once untouched temples. Nathan groaned, mumbled, ‘god damn it’, under his breath, and thus his body was reanimated into life. He rubbed his eyes and he stretched, that familiar scowl coming over his eyes and lips as he took in the sunlight damn near blinding him. A polar opposite to the being you’d appreciated just moments earlier.

“Ugh, fuck, how the fuck is it seven already.” He groaned. “I feel like shit.”

“Well good morning to you too,” You started, welcoming Nathan into the world. “‘I’m feeling pretty shitty as well.” 

You said that, but really… You were more than alright. Your head had hurt, slight nausea crept into the wells of your stomach, but other than that you’re sure you were phenomenally better than you’d have been waking up whereverTate would have left your ass.

“You need to get outta here, before everyone gets up.” Nathan drawled, but he didn’t sound as urgent as you expected him to be. You’d expected him to be angry that you were still in his room, but instead he just… accepted it. 

You snickered, climbing out of his throne of a bed. “Wow, you’re giving me the morning after treatment?” 

“Sure am. Get outta here, whore.”

“Oh fuck you.” 

You located your heels from last night, resting upright near his dorm room door. Heels didn’t sound like the most  practical to sneak out of a dorm with, so you instead opted to grappling them by the straps and carrying them at your side. Hair a mess, outfit riddled with wrinkles and makeup smudged under your eyes, you stood before Nathan in all your glory. He stared at you for a long, odd moment- and you for some reason felt exposed, or even, shy. 

“What?” You ask expectantly, placing a hand on your hip. 

His eyes trail to your line of vision. He shakes his head. “Just thinking about how now you really do look like my morning after.”

“Yeah?” You hummed. “Find it hard to believe you get a lot of those.”

Nathan shoots you a suggestive glance. “You’d be surprised. Everyone wants a piece of Prescott.”

Surely, he was joking, or maybe he wasn’t, but you… Didn’t like hearing that. It made your stomach feel odd, uncomfortably heavy.  As he stood up, reminding you how many inches he had over your size, you swallowed and cleared your throat to flush out that crappy feeling. “Well,” you started, mood having dropped. “I’m gonna go, then.” 

“What got your panties in a twist all the sudden?” He asked, raising a brow and pulling some clothes from his closet, tossing them onto the bed.

The bed you two had shared.

You hated the idea of his morning afters- whoever they may be. 

“Not feeling great. Probably a side effect of the roofies.” You mumbled.

Nathan breathed a laugh. “Probably.”

He seemed so calm, right now. Perhaps due to it being so early, before the outside world had a chance to remind him just why he was so uptight all the tight. Before he needed to be so uptight all the time. He really did have so many versions of himself- all of whom you were slowly becoming familiar with. Compared to the person you’d believed him to be before your run ins, you’d never have assumed someone so dangerous could be so soft as last night, as this morning. In the beginning, you’d feared him. Avoided him like a plague, or a wild animal. Even when you were enraptured in the existence of him, you still wanted to keep away. You’d never have believed someone like you could wake up clutched to his chest, as though he were afraid if he released you, you’d be gone long before he woke. 

Then, a sudden thought struck your mind. 

He’d held you so tight. He’d welcomed you in the morning. No anger, no annoyance. His soft laugh at your banter and taunts. How your heels were standing upright instead of tossed haphazardly into some random corner, where he’d watch your struggle to find. 

How he’d stayed awake to ensure your sleep.

“So are you just gonna stand there?” Nathan called you back to reality, hands gripping the hems of his shirt. “I gotta get ready and you need to wash up so you don’t look like a five dollar stripper.” Cruel words, but with absolutely no bite. You rolled your eyes.

“Yeah. But, hey,” You started. “Thank you for last night.” 

“Yeah, yeah. You gotta start learning to watch your own back.” He says. “There’s gonna be times I won’t be there to drag your ass out of the fire.”

If you’d been charged, if you’d been stricken with a strange defensiveness, you’d have retorted, ‘than stop helping me’, but… Instead you allowed yourself the comfort of protection. You allowed Nathan Prescott to watch you.  

“I know,” You reached for the door. “Thank you.”

With that, you bounded out of the dorm silent as a mouse. 

-----------

In hindsight, you should have left earlier. Class was merely 15 minutes away when you slipped out of Nathan's room and bounded towards the women's dorm. Albeit not exactly a long walk, by the time you discreetly snuck back into your own dorm, you had roughly twenty minutes to somehow pick an outfit from your countless unopened boxes and make yourself even slightly presentable. 

Wiping off whatever make-up you could get and reapplying it, brushing out the tangles of your hair and nearly tearing off your scalp in the process, scattering your nightclothes over your floor and managing to scrounge out a semi-decent outfit for the day… You still looked a mess. If the mirror could laugh, it would have. Black mascara smudges under your eyes and frizzy untreated hair. What a lovely look. 

You’d made it to class just five minutes late, but those five minutes were all it took for all eyes to be on you as you tried to slide into the classroom unnoticed. A couple classmates whispered to their table mates as you passed by, smelling of oversaturated cherry blossom perfume to hopefully cover the scent of alcohol. You sauntered to your seat and sank down with all your weight, suddenly exhausted. You’d made it with just five minutes tainting your record of attendance. The teacher greeted you with a disappointed sigh, and thus, the day began. 

But, it was so hard to focus. All you could think about was Nathan. 

“Alright class, who can tell me,” A board stick clacks against the chalkboard. “Who can answer problem four?” 

You lowered your head. 

“Ah, how about, ___?”

You snaked back into reality, blinking up at the chalk board that was somehow already riddled with math equations. Since you hadn’t been paying attention even in the slightest, your mouth gaped wide open, eyes scanning for something you understood even slightly so you didn’t look like a total idiot. 

Sadly, you were out of luck. The teacher shook his head. “I’m shocked,” He said. “You're normally so on top of things. Oh well.”

“Oh, I’m sure she was on top of things,” A female voice sniggered behind you “Last night.”

Your face flushed a red, hot, ruby. What the hell was she talking about? How had they found out you were with Nathan? You were so sure of being sneaky, there was no way-

“Her and Tate totally got it on last night.”

You whipped around in your seat, facing girls who looked to be clones of some sort. Both with the same dark eyes, short brown hair, and freckles. “What?”

“Alright-” Your teacher blurted. “That's enough. April, May, enough. Let’s not discuss things outside of the classroom.”

The two girls batted their eyes. “Sorry sir.” One spoke, twirling a hand through her hair. Her sister's wide toothy grin never fumbled. 

“Back to it then. Kate, can you help out __ with number four?” 

The small, blonde girl nodded quickly, brushing a lock of hair behind her eyes and offering an empathic nod. 

As you turned around in your seat, her answer fell on deaf ears. Your heart was racing in your chest, hands balled into fists while you stared ahead blankly.  

They couldn’t seriously think that you chose to leave with Tate, could they? Surely someone must have seen the state you were in. Someone other than Nathan.

The clock ticks forward but time feels like it's passing almost unnaturally slow. With just 10 minutes left, you feel your phone vibrate in your pocket.

‘Nathan: consider ur favor officially returned 

Your tongue poked from your lips, the tiniest of smiles taking over your once sullen features. Terrible thoughts and worries flew out the window while you type back, ‘damn. here i was gonna to ask you to do a backflip off the roof with me. there goes my plans.’

Nathan types for a moment. Typing, stopping, typing again. 

‘Nathan: soundz like a blast. where and when?’

A small blush heats your cheeks. ‘very funny. thanks to last night i have an entire 24 hour session of studying to catch up with.’

His response is almost instant. ‘Nathan: boringgg. txt me when ur fun.’

Rolling your eyes, you shove your phone back into your pocket. It seems you’ve been able to secure enough of a friendship with him for some mindless banter even outside your little visits. You smile. He’s… Fun to talk to. Surprisingly. 

Class comes to an end and you start to pack up the books and papers you’d hardly even glanced at the whole period. Whatever had been upsetting you before is lost in your mind while you think of the morning, the night before. All the things in-between. But, your happiness doesn’t last long. As you get up, you’re almost forced right back into your seat as a weight shoves into your shoulder. Your books scatter to the floor. April, the one who’d remarked about you earlier, glares at you in what looks to be disgust. 

“Careful April,” Her sister hums as she saunters past you, keeping distance and raising her already shrill tone of voice. “Might wanna watch where you’re walking- I’d hate for you to catch something from this slut.”

You absolutely gawk at her. “What the fuck did you just say to me?”

April scoffs. “Oh come on, like everyone doesn’t know what you were up to last night.”

“Sleeping around isn’t a good color on you.” May hikes her bag over her shoulder and snickers at you. They both leave the class together, sickeningly in sync. You’re left stunned where you stand, unsure how the hell your life came to this so quickly. How you’ve stooped so low that the daughters of the world's most uncreative parents are able to bully you based on something that didn’t even happen.

Next class goes no better. The person to your right, a jockey looking brunette guy, asks, ‘have you ever heard of a Tate?’. You say no, that that’s the dumbest name you’ve ever heard. The idiot grins and goes back to marking down likely wrong answers on his test sheet and you debate kicking the leg of his chair out- but you don’t to avoid even more eyes on you. It makes you sick to your stomach- even more than recovering from the roofies does. How can everyone believe it? You barely even knew the guy and you were clearly uncomfortable with his advances. No one saw that? 

After everything you’d worked for to build a reputation, trying so hard to not call out peoples shit for the sake of seeming friendly, tainted over something that didn’t even happen? And the kicker was that it hadn’t even been your fault! He’d drugged you, he’d have taken advantage of you! Yet you were the bad person? 

Class came and went in the blink of an eye this time. Your mind wrapped up in the situation, your stomach churning. You wanted the day to be over with but you still had 4 more classes to suffer through. Why was this happening to you? Was Tate being treated just as horribly, or was he getting pats on the backs of his unaware friends?

Wandering down the halls to your locker, you noticed Lance and Kaz hanging around one of the drinking fountains. Your nerves quelled- your friends would surely make you feel much better. Especially since they had witnessed how awful you were feeling as you left. You approach with a relieved smile, ready to say your truth and finally have someone on your side.

“Hey guys.” You smile, but Lance looks down at his feet while Kaz places her hands to his hips. Your smile fades.

“You could have told us you were gonna spend the night with Tate,” Kaz snaps. “You didn’t need to lie like that just to leave. We were all worried about you and it was for nothing.”

“What?” You feel like you could cry. “No, Kaz, I really did try to leave. Tate tried to drug me and take me home, and-”

“He wouldn’t do that.” Lance interrupts, with a frown. He looks back down at the floor with knitted brows. “I’ve known Tate since before time. He wouldn't do something like that, especially not to one of my best friends. Plus he told me he was really into you. Why would he even try?”

“Are you serious?” You sputter. “You think I’d lie about something like that?”

“You’ve been lying about all sorts of things!” Kaz huffs. “What’s going on with you lately? You’ve been so distant, and secretive. What are you hiding that’s making you lie like this? We’re supposed to be your friends and then you lie to our faces just to go and fuck the first guy that shows you attention.”

“What…?” It was like acid. It was like the rug had been pulled from your feet sending you spiraling down the unending cliff. Kaz, your best friend, all that venom. How could they turn against you like this? What the hell is going on? You felt your throat tighten. “Look, I’m sorry if I’ve been distant, but I’m not lying to you, I-”

“We gotta go.” Lance isn’t in the mood to hear it. “We’ll catch up to you.. Some other time.”

Kaz says nothing as she pushes past you. Lance, at least, spares a short glance over his shoulder. You stood there alone in the hallway, your bag falling off your shoulder and clattering onto the floor with a thud echoing off the walls. Everything you had, all gone at once. 

No one believed you.

---------

With nowhere to go where you felt like you could truly allow yourself to process the day's events, you went to the only place you knew. 

Just outside of campus, where rocks lined the edge of the boundary, overlooking the outskirts of the town and the ocean stretching as far as the eye could see. You settled yourself there, staring at the vast waters and wondering how this had all happened. Unlucky didn’t even begin to cover how it felt. Not only did you feel violated with Tate attempting to do unthinkable things with your unconscious body, but you also felt alone, and walked on. Your best friends hadn’t believed you. While Lance seemed saddened, Kaz was so… Angry. Her words cut like knives into your skin. 

It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair. You didn’t deserve this.

You want to talk to Nathan, but knowing him, he’d see your state and bounce instantly. After all, this isn’t exactly very fun of you.

As the sun began to fall, splaying orange and blues over the wide open sky, behind you, you could hear voices. A group of them, some male, some female. Memories of when your notebook had gotten snatched by those two horsed face assholes came flooding back and with all your alertness, you stood up, and decided that this sitting place was no longer safe. Nothing was.

Before you even made it ten feet away, the group had found their way to your spot and gotten comfortable, one of the girls cheering, ‘this’ll be our hangout! look at how pretty the view is!’

You took a short drive down the stretches of road and decided that if you were going to lament in your own sadness, you were at least going to do so in a place that had something to cover the sound of your tears. Plus a nice view.

The beach, littered with its picnic tables and the sounds of crashing waves would suffice just fine. So, you pulled in the desolate parking lot and wandered down the sandy shores until you stumbled upon a picnic table shaded by a large willow cascading lushious branches to block out the sun- a perfect canopy for you to wallow under. 

You had nothing at that moment. No friends, no reputation, no one to believe your tragic tale. And now, you’d just lost the one spot that made you feel comfortable when stress was building into your body like concrete. Tears pricked into the corners of your eyes and you bit your lip, dreading that feeling of a lump in your throat. Why you? Everything had been going so well. How could not even a single person believe that Tate had tried to hurt you?

Well, actually, there was one person.

Of course Nathan believed you. He’d been the one to rescue you, after all. Time and time again it seemed.  How was it that even the ones closest to you would turn their back so fast, yet Nathan seemed to be there even when you didn’t want him to be? Even when you yelled at him, and he yelled right back, fire and sparks falling into embers around the two of you. 

In that moment, you almost felt like you could finally relate to him. A reputation based on lies and things out of your control, paired with a hardheaded attitude to try and combat all the assumptions. 

No wonder he was so angry. 

“Hey bitch,” A voice suddenly called, and you had a split second moment where you were terrified of once again being the victim of a cruel prank or some classmates boredom. “How about next time you have a pity party you don’t fucking call me in the middle of it.”

You blinked away your tears and through the blurriness saw a figure coming towards you. All that sass, the tone...

“Nathan?” You breathed. It only takes moments before he’s in front of you, holding his phone in view, seeing that the call that had been running for nearly ten minute. You flush in embarrassment, pulling your phone from your back pocket. “How did that happen?”

“Well, can your ass dial numbers?” He taunts, ending the call. 

“Damn it, dumb phone must have butt-dialed you. I knew I should’ve gotten a different one.” You mentally kick yourself. “It must have unlocked in my pocket.”

“You don’t have a password on your phone?” He taunts. When you shake your head, he whistles. “You are just begging for a robbery. I’ll keep that in mind when I’m in the mood to send random messages to all your buddies.” 

“Fuck off.” You scowl, and he grins, hopping up on the picnic table next to you. The sun flatters his skin. He’s almost glowing. 

“Speaking of buddies, how the hell did it pick my number out of your sea of friends?”

You shrug. “Probably cuz’ it’s a priority contact.” 

“Oh lala, I’ve been upgraded to priority huh? Does it display a superman logo whenever you give it a ring?”

“Nope. When I press call it rings the nearest asshole in my vicinity. The fact that it’s you is your own problem.”

“Haha, fucking ha.” He leans forward and rests his elbows on his knees. He stares out at the water, watching waves pull and crash onto the beach. It’s almost beautiful, until he ruins it. “Yknow, you’re a really ugly crier.”

“Wow, thanks.” You shake your head. “That's exactly what I needed to hear right now. Why did you even stay on the line?.” Wiping your eyes, you start to forget your tears. “Couldn’t have been that wild of a conversation.”

Nathan shrugs. “Between the crying and the sound of the waves it was pretty nice.” He grins. “Very educational.” 

“Awesome. Glad I was able to make your day.” It doesn’t feel like your usual bitey remarks. You’re tired, you’re still a little hurt and you can’t stop thinking about how such an amazing morning had turned into such a horrible day.

“So what’s got you all fucked up? Never seen you act like this big of a baby before.”

“Nothing. You already paid off your debt to me per this morning, so feel free to resume our regularly scheduled mutual hatred.” You say, lying through your teeth. You know you’re both past the point of hatred, but you’re feeling jaded, you can’t help it. 

“Oh shut the fuck up,” He groans. “I didn’t drag my ass all the fucking way out to this shit hole of a beach just for you to give me that bullshit. What, did you fail a test? No one matched you on tinder?”

“Everyone thinks me and Tate slept together last night.” You blurt. “I think he’s telling people me and him had sex.”

Nathan tenses his shoulders and grimaces. “Fucking werido.”

“I told my best friends that he tried to take advantage of me and they don’t believe me. One of em’ even said he wouldn’t do something like that.”

“Fuck em’. Who needs best friends.”

“And to make everything so much better, these two bitches that I share four of my classes with harassed me all goddamn day. I mean, fucks sake, how the hell are girls named April and May of all things able to get to me. It’s bullshit. And to make matters worse, Tate is just… Getting away with it.”

“Yeah well, something tells me that Tate’s gonna get a real nice fucking taste of medicine eventually. I just gotta find him first. He’s got a lot of nerve spreading shit around given I knocked his ass onto the pavement.” Nathan brows knit at the memory.

You test the waters. “Why would you do that for me?”

He seems caught off guard, or maybe, surprised that you’d ask. Maybe he thinks you’re both beyond that point. He grumbles, “Why does it matter.”

“I’m just curious. We don’t owe each other anything, remember?”

“Yeah, well,” He huffs. “Don’t ask me questions to shit I don’t know the answer to.”

“You say that an awful lot.” You tease.

“Yeah well you ask dumbass questions an awful lot. Not everything I do has to have some weird ass motives behind it, ___. Maybe I’ve got beef with Tate that’s outside of you.”

“Uhuh. Sure.” You’re about to say something else, when your phone lights up with a text. The display makes your heart fall all over again. 

Unknown Number: you should just pack up and go somewhere else. no one wants std’s from breathing your air xoxo

You don’t even know who that is. Now absolute strangers are on your case. You want to throw your phone into the ocean and leave.

Nathan scoffs. “Don’t even bat a fucking eye for that bitch, whoever the hell they are. Half the hoes you’ve mentioned have slept with half the football team,” he pinches his jacket, “and I would know.”

“Ew, Nathan,” You grimace, that same feeling from the morning returning. It feels, oddly, like jealousy.  He nudges your arm with his elbow and grins playfully. It’s cute.

“Chill, I’m just fucking with you. You gotta know even I wouldn’t fuck girls that desperate. I’m a man of class.”

That last comment actually forces a laugh from you. It’s soft, but it’s real. The first laugh you’ve genuinely had all day. “That’s horrible.” You remark, giggling again.

It's almost like the slight restoration of your mood puts him at ease as well. He leans back on his hands and stares off into the ocean, those sparkling waters under the setting, orange sun. “I’m for real though. Those hoes aren’t worth your time. One day when we blow this shithole of a town they’re not even gonna matter.”

Your brows knit, eyes blinking up at him. Had you heard that right? 

“We?” You ask, perplexed, albeit a little… Hopeful.

Nathan sputters. “Well- Like, when everyone’s older and-”

“You know what, it's fine.” You interrupt. “Fuck it. You’re right. We’re gonna blow this town and they’re just gonna be some shitty memories.”

He sucks in a shaky breath. You’ve never heard him scramble like that, like he’s been unmasked. The look he casts you when you agree, when you don’t tease or patronize and finally hop on the idea that yeah, what if the two of you really didn’t have to deal with it anymore.

What if the two of you could just exist, without the anger. 

You look up at him. “Would you actually do that though?” You start. “With me, of all people?”

He swallows. His expression is tense, but he’s not upset. He appears nervous, caught off guard. Nathan tries, “I-”

Your phone rings. Shrill, piercing. Mood destroying. 

“Jesus Christ, it’s my mom.” You grab your phone and Nathan looks forward, stone faced and silent as you hop off the table and answer. It’s your mother, who all but shouts into the phone that her and your father are taking a surprising visit to Arcadia Bay while they’re traveling by on their vacation. She insists that you be ready in about an hour for dinner, and likely there will be family photos. 

Which means if you still look as wrecked as you did this morning, you’re gonna have a lot of washing up to do. With a quick goodbye, a short and sweet, ‘love you’, you hang up and sigh. 

“You still tell your mom you love her?” He teases. “What are you, five?”

You frown. “You don’t tell your parents you love them?”

Nathan side eyes you, and just shrugs. It is all the answer you need, really, and for his sake you decide it wouldn’t be best to press the issue. Not now. But- it still makes your heart hurt just a little. You wished that he’d had it better growing up. 

“Right… Do you want a ride home?”

“Fuck no, what am I,” He shoves his hands into his pockets. “a fucking girl scout?” 

“I was just offering, weirdo.” When he doesn't get up, you feel like you’re missing out. Like if you stayed, maybe, just maybe, you’d get to know him a little better. “Hey, if you want, I can stay for a bit longer.”

He rolls his eyes. “You’re needed elsewhere. But,” he shrugs. “I don’t know. Fuckin’... Text me or something. Or not, I don’t care either way.”

There’s a small warmth in your chest that rises to your cheeks. He wants you to text him. “Yeah,” You say. “If I’m feeling fun.”

And with that, you bid him farewell, beginning your descent to the parking lot. 

“Hey,” He calls, and you turn just in time to catch a small item he’s tossed right at you. A tiny key resides in the palm of your hand. “Spare. If shit hits the fan again-...” He shrugs, and actually looks away. “Just don’t be too fucking loud of I’ll kick your ass out myself. No Madison needed.”

The widest grin plays over your lips. “I’m gonna re-decorate your room while you’re gone.”

“Ah, you fucking better not.” He shouts. “Actually- you know what, give it back.” 

“No, no! I’m sorry.” You play with the key between your fingers. “Thanks for this.”

“Yeah, whatever. Don’t lose it and remember- emergencies only. I don’t need you watching me sleep like fucking freak. We’re past that stage.” 

“How many times will I have to say I was never watching you. Christ… But, alright. See ya, then.” The key is heavy in your palm. 

You place it into your pocket and give him one last glance before you take off, leaving him to enjoy the sound of waves, birds, and the absence of your tears.

[staywritten]

A Love That Lasts│Epilogue

A Love That Lasts │ Epilogue

Synopsis: You’ve spent the last two years, helping your very handsome next door neighbor raise his adorable daughter. The two of you fell into a routine before you knew it. And now you had this little family. You couldn’t help but fall for him.

Genre: Parent!Au, Dad!Bang Chan, Fluff, Nonidol!Au, Smut

Word Count: 3044

Part I │Part II │Part III │Part IV │Part V

A Love That Lasts Masterlist

Masterlist. AO3

“Today’s the day! Today’s the day! Today’s the day!” Minseo jumped up and down on her father’s bed, waking him up with a belly flop. He chuckled, wrapping his arms around his daughter, kissing her hair softly and pulling her back into bed.

“Why are you so full of energy?” he smiled into her fluffy hair. “I’m the one getting married”

“Because after today I have a Mom!” she chimed. 

He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes to look at his daughter. “You’re really happy about this aren’t you?”

“The happiest!” she beamed. “This is gonna be so cool! I get a Mom, and two new grandparents and it’s the best” She hugged him as tight as she could “And grandmas helped me pick out a dress and it’s so pretty!”

“Baby a lot is gonna change, I want you to let me know if it gets overwhelming.” he looked down at her sincerely.

“I’m fine!”

“You’re getting a mom… I’m getting a wife...we’re moving into a new house...our family is getting bigger- wow in laws… in laws that probably hate me...” he mumbled to himself, a frown forming as it finally all sank in just how much his life was gonna change in the matter of a few hours.

 “You ok Daddy?” you pouted pressing the furrow between his brows.

“I think I’m getting cold feet…” he sighed, running his hand through his hair.

“I’ll get you socks!” she chimed, wiggling out of his arms.

You were prepared for a stressful wedding. The planning process proved to be more challenging than all your years of med school and your residence. Dealing with not only your overbearing mother, but also Chan’s. Every decision you made followed by another five. You were happy to get this wedding over with.

You wanted nothing more than to just legally call Chan your husband and Minseo your daughter. “Just a few more hours” you sighed. 

You frowned looking down at your phone while getting your hair done. The last time you saw him was yesterday afternoon since your mom was so superstitious. She made you stay in your childhood, not wanting Chan to see you until your wedding. You texted him the moment you woke up but he hadn’t said anything back. You know he read the message, it was so unlike him to not reply but it was your wedding day perhaps he was just overwhelmed getting ready. 

Minseo ran inside the hair salon with your mom trailing behind her. “Today’s the day!” she cheered running into your arms. 

A smile instantly appeared on your face as you kissed her cheek. “Today is the day!” you grinned, nuzzling her nose. “You ready to get your hair and nails done?”

She nodded “Can I have matching nails with you?” 

“Of course you can Baby” your eyes softened, squishing her face. “I missed you, did you sleep well?”

“Mhmm! But I wish you were home”

“Me too” you pouted “How did your Dad sleep? Was he ok this morning?”

“He slept well~ But he has cold feet! I gave him extra socks before I left”

You frowned “Cold feet huh?” she smiled, shaking her head. “Well you were super smart to give him extra socks” you touched her nose. “Thank you”

“Minseo, let’s get your nails started” your mom called out to her walking her over to the nail tech, to sit with Chan’s mom. 

You sighed when your mom walked over to you, crossing her arms over her chest. “Mom please don’t start” you knew exactly where this conversation was going. 

“The boy has cold feet, what are the chances you think he’s actually going to show up?” she whispered to you not wanting to make a scene. 

“Here we go again” you rolled your eyes “Mom it’s a wedding, everyone gets nervous. Stop making this into a direct attack on Chris”

“Maybe you’re rushing into things”

“And there it is”  you looked to your mom and shook your head. 

You introduced Chan and Minseo to your parents not too long after you started dating. They always knew about them since you talked so fondly of your neighbors but they weren’t too surprised you started dating. Your mother just wasn’t too fond of you dating a man that had a child. She instantly fell in love with Minseo the moment they met, who couldn’t? She was a bundle of joy. But she always looked at Chan like he wasn’t good enough. Both your parents were Doctors, you were their only daughter and sure, your relationship with Chan wasn’t conventional, but it never was. You knew she looked down on him, even if she didn’t explicitly say it. 

“Mom I’m not having this conversation again, especially not on my wedding day.” You glanced down the salon and looked at Minseo animatedly speaking to her grandma and smiled. “I love Chris and Minseo so much…And I know it’s not what you wanted. I know that you would rather me marry some doctor with no kids and that we started a family once we got married but I chose this. I fought this feeling I had for him for years and I’m tired...I just want to be with the man I love. Chris has been my family long before this wedding”

“Look, I understand that you have feelings for Chris, he’s a nice young man, but-”

“No buts. No more buts.”

“What about the girl's mother? Is she really out of the picture? Who abandons their daughter?”

“The girl has a name. And Minseo is my daughter now. As for her mother, Chris will tell me when he’s ready I’m not pushing him on this.”

“But”

“No. Who I marry is a nonnegotiable.” you stood up, moving over to the makeup artist table. 

Bickering with your mom was nothing new, especially when she got a little too pushy, But you did wish that Chan would at least respond to your text to ease your mind. 

After a few hours of hair and makeup, you stared at yourself in the mirror, a little speechless. You were really doing this, you were gonna be married. You smoothed down the dress, running your hand over the embroidered lace. You had that ah-ha moment when you were dress shopping but there was something about seeing it all put together. 

Hearing the little chime of your ringtone you frowned. There was no reason that Felix should be calling you a few minutes before the wedding. Taking a deep breath you answered. “Hey?”

“Hey~” his tone a little too casual given the timing. “Um… so you must be wondering why I’m calling”

You sighed heavily “Felix what is it?”

“Ok, don’t be mad but-”

“Don’t start with don’t be mad!”

“See now you already sound mad and I’m too scared to tell ya”

“Felix!”

“I may have misplaced something…”

“You’re the best man Felix! Did you lose the wedding rings?”

“I’m offended! Those rings cost more than the down payment on my car” he scoffed. “They are safely tucked away in my blazer”

“Then what did you lose? Oh no, was it Chris’s tux?”

“Nah, I lost Chris”

“You what?! What do you mean! Felix!”

“See I asked you not to get mad, and yelling sounds a lot like being mad”

“How the hell did you lose a person?”

“I don’t need the attitude, he’s a lot faster than Minseo and can cover a lot more ground, I didn’t know he was a flight risk” he sighed “Look Jisung is calling him, and I’m checking around the venue, I’ll keep you updated”

“Please do…” you shook your head, hanging up. 

Well this was a turn of events. Your wedding planner made sure you had at least three back up plans for any other decision you made but there was no plan for a run away groom. You looked at the time, there was still thirty minutes before you had to be in the wedding hall, so you figured you’d look for your fiance. You needed to make sure he was ok, especially since he never shut you out before. You switched out of your strappy heels and into a pair of sneakers, hiking up your dress so that you could see your feet. 

There was a small knock at the door before it cracked open. You looked up and your eyes met a very tired Chan. He chuckled seeing you slip on your sneakers. “Runaway bride?” he grinned leaning on the door frame. 

You released a relieved sigh. “I’m not the runaway! Your groomsmen said you left?”

He laughed before walking inside and closing the door behind him. “I literally told Changbin that I was going to the venue first because I needed to talk to you” He took your hands into his rubbing his thumbs over your skin. “You look so beautiful…” his dark brown eyes practically twinkling as he looked at you. “Wow…” his cheek dimpled as his smile widened, he spun you in his hands as he took you in. 

You shyly looked at him, the warm way he stared at you making you more embarrassed than ever. “Should I be concerned that you wanted to talk to me before the wedding?” you frowned a bit “You’ve been ghosting me all day”

He gave you a sheepish smile. “I’m sorry...I just needed some time” 

“To think about us…?”

“No, not us” he smiled “We’re solid. I love you...but” he brought your fingers to his lips. “I just...I felt a little guilty. I wanna give you all of me...but I just..I’m a little worried that all of me isn’t enough...”

“Chris…” you frowned, taking his hand and bringing him over to the couch to sit with you. “You’re more than enough...if you didn’t know that then I’m...I’m not showing you how much I love everything about you…”

“I have a ways to go...but I always try my hardest...I’m not there yet but I’m trying-”

“You are perfect.” your tone, absolute. There was not a single thought in your mind of how perfect he was for you. 

“Your parents must hate me...They raise a beautiful, independent kind doctor and she settles for a single parent who make music-”

“Hey, that’s my soon to be husband you’re talking about. I’m not gonna let anyone trash talk you Chris, including you.” you squeezed his hand “And that last time I checked, I was the one marrying you not my parents.”

“But-”

“No buts. Yes you’re a parent. A parent of the literal light of my life, I can’t imagine my life without Minseo...I love her so much and you being her father will never be a negative...and yes you make music, you pour your heart into your passion and I love watching how you light up when you talk about it…. Chris I’m not settling for you in any capacity. I chose you to be my partner, my best friend, my soulmate, and my husband”

He let out that shy sweet giggle he had that you loved so much, his shoulders shrugging along with it. “I still don’t think I’m good enough but I’ll try to be…”

“Then I’ll spend the rest of my life as your partner, showing you that you are more than enough” you leaned in pressing a sweet kiss against his lips.

“I love you...and I’ll spend the rest of my life making sure that you always think I’m enough.. I’m really happy you’re gonna be my wife” he grinned at you pressing his forehead against yours. 

“Any more concerns? I want to rid you of your worries” you smiled lovingly at him. 

“I want to give you the world…”

“Chris you already have… You and Minseo are my whole world”

He pulled back, lacing his fingers with yours. There was something else that’s been weighing in the back of his mind, he always pushed it away because there was never a proper time to bring it up. He wanted to get married once, and to be fair to you he figured he should finally come clean about his life. “I wasn’t planning on telling you this minutes before we got married but...About Minseo’s mom…”

“Chris you don’t have to” you were always curious, but there was just something about his eyes that made you not push further. 

“But I want you to, I want to be fair to you...To know me” he took your hand placing it over his heart. “Know all of me…”

“Then, I’m here for you”

And for the first time in five years he opened up to someone. Felix and his parents were the only people who really knew the details. But there was something about coming clean to you that made him feel like a huge weight was lifted. He told you about his first love. The first person he gave his heart to, and the first time he dealt with heartbreak. She was stubborn, strong, independent, and dedicated to her job. Everything that he loved her for became the reason they broke up. 

“We didn’t plan for Minseo, but we did everything to prepare for her. To make sure she was loved. I was surprised at first but the moment I heard her heartbeat I knew I was going to do everything I could to protect her….As I got more invested in all of the prenatal care, my girlfriend seemed to lose a part of herself… It was like she powered through it… She was never the type to want to be a mom but I thought she changed her mind...But as soon as Minseo was born she left. Gave me full custody and a goodbye letter.”

Your eyes watered hearing his story, seeing the pain in his eyes. You pulled him into a tight hug, rubbing his back softly. 

“Despite that… I don’t hate her... Because in the end, it was just so her...She couldn’t be tied down and I used to love her for that… And I thought I could change her... that maybe she’d pick me and our child and stay with us” he let out a broken and bitter laugh. “But if she stayed we would have been miserable...She would have resented me...Minseo wouldn’t have had a happy home, and for that I have no regrets” he looked up at you sheepishly, giving you such a sad smile. “If you’ll still have me… I’m all yours.”

There were no words of comfort you could offer him. Because this was a wound that he’s already healed. It was just one that he’s kept hidden. There was nothing more you could do to heal it, but you could show him that you love him, and everything he came with. “Christopher, I’ve told you before… I'm your partner, I’m not going anywhere”

“Promise?” and there was something about how he looked up to you with his big, warm, brown eyes. The vulnerable look of hope as he held his pinky out. You couldn’t help but smile at how similar he was to Minseo. 

“Promise” you wrapped your pinky around his, pressing your thumbs together, sealing the promise. “You ready to get married?”

“Absolutely” 

“I’m gonna go wait for you down the aisle” he pecked your lips again before heading out. 

You couldn’t help but smile, practically beaming and watching him leave. It was go-time. You changed back into your heels and took a deep breath. One final longing look at yourself before your father came in. “You ready?” Your dad watched you warmly, a smile never leaving his face. “You look so beautiful” he pulled you into the biggest warmest hug. “I can’t believe I have to give you away”

You laughed leaning into your dad as he walked you toward the hall. “You and mom both”

“Your mom means well...You know how she is?”

“I do but I just wished she wasn’t so hard on Chris...He works hard, he does what he loves and makes sure that his daughter wants for nothing. I appreciate him...I fell in love with his kindness first...Dad, he’s my home”

“I’m gonna be honest I thought he was an opportunist, and I didn’t see what he offered you at first but...the way you look at him… the way you stand up to your mother...how you are with Minseo. I see it.” he smiled, rubbing your back softly. “You chose your home and I’ll love and respect you for it.”

“Thanks Dad…”

He kissed your forehead as you reached the wedding hall, the music from the piano chiming as they anticipated you. “You will always be my Baby… but you’re gonna be that man’s wife, and that sweet little girl's mom.. You ready for that responsibility?”

“I am” the sureness in warmness in your voice was all the reassurance he needed. Your mom would come around eventually, but for now having your father's support and the love of your new family gave you the strength to support Chris.

As the doors swung open your eyes instantly went to your fiance standing by the altar, Minseo in his arms, eyes practically sparkling as she happily whispered to him, pointing at you. Even Though he’d spent the past twenty minutes by your side with you in your wedding dress, it really didn’t hit him until this moment that you were going to be his wife. 

The nerves finally hit you as you walked down the aisle. It wasn’t that you were anxious, you were just excited to finally start this part of your life. Your new family was waiting for you. 

And although you knew that you guys weren’t perfect, and there will be obstacles in your way. You were sure that with Chan you two could overcome anything. 

End.

Thank you for sticking with me all this time, we’re finally saying goodbye to this series. I’m sure I’ll make a oneshot for it here and there, just because I really like writing Minseo.

And *cough* I’m also *cough* maybe working on a short series/one shot for Minseo’s mom as the reader >.>

∘Tags List:

@skzsprinkles @tophuphu @hugs4chan @channieboyo  @cobbiebaexqueen @minnieskz  @em0cleo  @chwrryeols​ @binki-g @mythicalamphitrite

[whatcouldgowrong-ohthat]

Doll (Bucky x Tall!Reader One-shot)

This is one of my submissions for Cloudy’s 200 follower challenge! So proud of you, girly!!

Pairing: Bucky x Tall!Reader

Dialogue Prompt: High as a Kite (highlighted in bold)

Summary: While Y/N was out on a mission, Bucky accidentally got himself hurt. So what happens when she finds her best friend/crush not nearly as quiet as he usually is?

Warnings: Guys, there’s no angst. This is all fluff.

“Who’s going to tell her?”

“I’m not! It was an accident!”

“Yes, let’s piss off the Amazonian.”

“She’s not an Amazon. She’s just tall.”

“Please, can we focus?”

“I own the building. That means I can call immunity.”

“Honestly, I’d rather be recording this for future blackmail.”

“Well, someone has to tell her.”

“Tell me what?”

Three bodies spun around, shielding the glass window they had been peering into moments before. Y/N watched them curiously. Scott, Bruce, Sam, and Tony were hiding something. She stepped closer to them, brow furrowing when Scott and Bruce instinctively moved in front of the door.

“Okay, what’s going on?” She looked down at Sam, hoping to get some sort of clarity from Bucky’s partner in crime.

“I still think I should be recording.”

“Recording what?” Y/N stepped closer. She didn’t want to admit it, but panic was starting to stir in her chest. She’d been gone on a mission with Steve and had only gotten back a little while ago. Ever since, she’d been looking for Bucky. He’d promised a movie marathon with her and she was coming to collect.

But in three hours – she hadn’t seen or heard from him.  At first, she thought she had done something wrong, but now? Seeing four of her five friends hiding outside a med-room? With no clue were her best friend was? She knew it wasn’t her fault. They were hiding something.

She walked up to Bruce, her heeled boots clicking on the floor until she was practically chest to chest with him. Looking down at him, she crossed her arms and immediately began tapping her foot.

Tony cleared his throat, not exactly in the mood to see a hulked-out Banner fighting the Winter Soldier’s crush. He still had people working on repairs from when Bucky ate the last of Hulk’s M&Ms. “Relax, Y/N. The intimidation tactics aren’t going to work.”

She groaned, dropping her hands and looking at the “genius” that felt the need to call her out in this particular moment. “You guys won’t let me know where he is!”

“He’s in there!”

Everyone looked back to Scott. He was still shielding the window from Y/N’s sight, but now he was hiding his face behind his hands. He peeked between his fingers, looking similar to a child in this moment. If she wasn’t so worried about what they were hiding, she’d probably laugh.

Her gaze shifted to the door. She gestured for Scott to step aside. He didn’t even argue. Looking through the glass, she bit her lip. The panic that had been there moments before was gone now, replaced with relief. “What happened?”

“Barnes ate Hulk’s M&M’s. I’m still trying to get the community kitchen fixed up because of it,” Tony explained.

Y/N looked at Bruce, raising an eyebrow. “You hulked out because of M&M’s?”

“I didn’t! The…” Bruce huffed. “The big guy did.”

Y/N turned back to the window and snorted, biting back a laugh.

“She’s finding this amusing. Should we be worried?” Scott looked at Bruce and Tony. Sam simply shrugged. Their usefulness for this had just run out.

“I’m going to check on him. Can you four go find something else to look at?” She didn’t bother sparing them a glance, slipping inside the room and closing the door behind her.

Instead of leaving like Y/N had asked, they crowded in front of the glass. Each of them was desperate to get a good look. “You better hope this works, Stark,” Scott muttered, unable to contain his smile.

“All my creations work, thank you very much. Especially when Banner’s helping me.”

“I’d rather not agree with that statement after Ultron.”

Tony glanced at Bruce and scoffed. “Traitor.”

“Quiet,” Sam ordered, swatting Tony upside the head. “I’m trying to hear!”

 -----

Y/N walked towards the bed Bucky was currently laying on. He was hooked to an IV, but she wasn’t sure what medicine they were pumping in his system. Surely it wasn’t too bad, right? If it were, Steve would be here, frantic and worried about what had happened to his best friend. But that wasn’t the case. So, she ran her fingers through his hair, allowing that flutter of crazed nerves to erupt in her chest and stomach. God, she couldn’t help the feelings this man gave her.

She noticed the massive bruise in his hairline. It was swollen. Like he’d been thrown into something a few times. “Hulk really did a number on you, huh?” Her voice was soft, gentle because she didn’t want to wake him up. But this was Bucky after all. Anything could wake him up. He blinked once, twice, before finally moving his head. He groaned, moving to sit up, but Y/N was there to make the movement easier. “Hey, sleepy head.”

“What happened?”

“Apparently someone decided to take Hulk’s peanut butter M&M’s?”

A sheepish grin appeared on Bucky’s face as he ran a hand through his hair. “Oops?”

“That’s all you have to say?” Y/N laughed and shook her head. “Really?”

That sheepish grin of his was shifting. His bright eye watching her with something she didn’t quite understand. But his pupils were blown. The awkwardness of being found out faded away as he started giggling.

Bucky fucking Barnes was giggling.

Bucky laughing was already a rare sight indeed. Almost impossible to see unless you were as close with him as Steve or Y/N was. But giggling? She was sure not even Steve had seen that before.

“Oh my god, what did they give you?”

She laughed as she took a step back, but before she could get too far, Bucky grabbed her hand. He pulled her close, catching her before she could fall. A hand was wrapped around her waist as he watched her intently. “I like holding you like this,” he told her, looking up at her and tilting his head. “I like looking up at you.” Of all the people on the team, Bucky was the only one who ever encouraged her height. In fact, if there were moments where he could look up at her, he did. He enjoyed how tall she was. Her curves and height were a rare sight and it was how she was nicknamed the “Amazon” of the team.

“Buck,” she murmured, laughing and leaning away from him. “You’re high as a kite, aren’t you?”

Bucky pouted at her as she ran her hands through his hair. “I’m being honest. Why don’t you believe me?”

“Because they had to have given you something.”

“No,” he drawled, dragging out the word as if it had twenty extra letters. “I’m a super soldier, ‘member?” He grinned like the cat that ate the canary. “Drugs don’t work on me.”

“No known drugs work on you, Buck. But who knows what cocktail Banner and Stark gave you?”

Another giggle from Bucky and Y/N couldn’t stop herself from smiling. He was absolutely adorable. Drugged up or not. Silence fell as she continued playing with his hair, earning soft hums from the loveable goofball in her arms. He was so calm. There was no pain or tension anywhere in his face. He was actually…relaxed.

“Why don’t you like me, Y/N?”

She frowned. He’d closed his eyes, tilting his head back as she kept playing with his hair. Had he even realized he’d asked her? “Of course, I like you, Bucky.”

Bucky groaned, pouting once again. He leaned forward as his forehead found her shoulder. “No, you don’t. Not like I like you.”

“Not like you like me?” Y/N felt like her heart was ready to burst out of her chest. Did he really admit to liking her? She glanced at the IV. What the hell had Tony and Bruce given him? “What do you mean, Bucky?”

“I like holding you,” he murmured, nuzzling her neck. His hands wrapped around her waist were now tracing up her back. “I like watching movies and cuddling…”

“I like those things too.”

He whined again, clearly not believing her. She felt like she was talking to a puppy. “Then why do you go on dates? I hate that.” He pouted, his nose nuzzling into her neck. “I hate seeing guys take you out when they don’t deserve you. I want to date you. I want to take you out. I want to kiss you. I want to…I want to…”

“Want to what?”

“I want to show you how important you are, Y/N.”

If she hadn’t been blushing before, she certainly was now. She had never expected to hear these words out of Bucky and here he was admitting that he felt everything she did. And he wouldn’t even remember it, would he?

“Oh, Buck,” she murmured, hands moving from his hair to his back. “I wish you knew how important you are to me.”

There was a pause as if Bucky wasn’t sure he heard her right. But once a few moments passed, a muffled, “I am?” was asked.

Y/N chuckled and looked down at him. Tilting his head up, she ran her fingers along his cheek. It was gentle, ghost-like. “You are. But I got to tell you that when you aren’t drugged up.” He grinned again. It was sleepy. The poor boy probably needed more rest than they realized. “Get some rest, hm?”

“Stay.” He blinked, slowly. “Please?”

Y/N smiled as she helped him lay back down. He kept a hand securely attached to hers, clearly wanting to keep her at his side. “Buck –“

“Please,” he murmured.

She sighed. “Alright. I’ll stay.”

He let go of her hand but kept his droopy gaze on her. Bucky was determined to make sure she wasn’t going anywhere. Shrugging off her jacket, she bent down and unzipped her boots. Her gaze shifted to the door to see her four friends giving her wide grins and several thumbs up. “Oh, leave, would you?” she snapped, throwing a boot at the door. They all jumped and ducked away, running off as she shook her head. Those idiots.

Taking off her other boot, she climbed into the bed. It was far too small with his massive frame and her tall, curvy build, but they made do. He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her towards him and burying his face in her hair and neck. She lightly played with his hair, the other hand wrapped around him and tracing up and down his spine. It was soothing. Intimate.

“Go to sleep, Bucky.”

“You too, Doll.”

Y/N pressed her lips against his hair, hiding her smile at the nickname. He’d never called her that before. It was always her name or some nickname from it, but never ‘doll’. Until now. She closed her eyes, letting herself fall asleep in his arms.

------------------

(BONUS)

Bucky woke to the dull remains of a headache and an impossible warmth around him. He didn’t want to open his eyes. That would mean pulling away from the warmth. So instead, he pulled the warmth closer. His arms tightened around it, clinging to it.

Then he heard a soft moan. The exhale of someone’s sigh. And everything came back.

The fight with Hulk…

Bruce and Tony getting him to the med-bay…

Bruce’s countless apologies…

Tony wanting to “take advantage” of the moment with some new medicine they had been working on with Cho…

And Y/N.

He remembered her visiting. He remembered – He remembered everything. Opening his eyes, he realized he was curled into Y/N. His head was resting on her chest, listening to her heart. His arms were wrapped around her, her hands in his hair. Tilting his head up ever so slightly, he smiled when he saw that he was, in fact, still in Y/N’s arms.

He couldn’t wipe the grin off his face as he memorized her peaceful features. She liked him. She liked him as much as he liked her. And as excited about it as he was, he wouldn’t dare wake her when she looked like this. Instead, he pressed the smallest kiss to her lips. It could hardly even count as one, he was so scared to wake her. Nuzzling her neck, he closed his eyes once again and simply enjoyed holding her. The giddiness in his chest made it impossible for him to fall back asleep. But he could enjoy this, enjoy holding her. And that was absolutely what he would do.

“I can’t wait to show you how much you mean to me, Doll.”

-----

Tag List:

@crushedbyhyperbole​

[dammitadolfnomorecake]

Once Bitten, Twice Stupid prt 105 prt2

Keith could lie. He could lie and comfort Lance by pretending to be strong... yet he couldn’t do that. He had to be honest with the man he loved

“I don’t know what I am... other than confused and scared”

“What do we do?”

“We wait. We see what the ultrasound says... and we figure it out”

“And what... if they’re...”

“Either way, we’ll work it out”

Lance clutched up at him, Keith relieved his lover’s strength had started to return

“I don’t think I can do this. I don’t think... I want to lose them”

Keith swallowed down the emotions choking his throat. He didn’t know if Lance meant it or not, and Lance wasn’t in the right frame of mind to question him

“Okay... okay... I’m here. I’m staying. We’ll figure this out”

“I love you... so much... I wanted this in the future... I feel so guilty for it happening now”

“You’re getting worked up again. Coran wants to you stay as calm as you can. We can’t do anything for now”

“I’m still really tired”

“You nap. I’ll be here holding you”

“You really are the best boyfriend ever...”

Half an hour later, Coran knocked on the door before letting himself in. Waking Shiro up, his brother stretched as he yawned, Coran kind enough, and smart enough, to bring coffee with him. With Lance cuddled against him, Coran first handed a cup to Shiro, then brought one over to him. He didn’t get what Coran was trying to do by repeatedly jerking his head towards Shiro. His poor brother standing behind the man looking anxious. Coran finally having to take it on himself to gently send Shiro off for a shower so they could do testing, and Keith then getting what Coran meant. Social cues were not his friend.

Waiting for Shiro to leave, Coran then smiled at him softly

“How are you feeling?”

“Still pretty shocked and confused”

And really clingy. Despite how he felt before, he didn’t want to let Lance go, nor did he want to let anyone near him

“I’m sure you will for the next few days at least. How was Lance?”

“He woke up for a bit, said he was still really sleepy”

“Ah, to be expected. I did introduce a mild sedative into the IV. Nothing major, just a little something to help him rest. Now, I’m sure you’re both anxious. Why don’t you wake him up and I’ll get things organised. I’m afraid you’ll have to stand, I need space to examine him”

Fuck. He didn’t want to move. Lance would get too upset if he did, but for Lance’s sake he had to

“Can you take the cup for a moment?”

“Of course. I’ll put on the table for now”

While Coran got organised, Keith nuzzled into Lance’s hair, kissing the soft locks between words

“Babe. It’s time to wake up”

Groaning at him, Lance made it clear what he thought of that idea

“I know, but Coran’s here...”

“Coran?”

That got his attention. The cogs in Lance’s brain starting to work

“Yeah, he’s here to do the scan”

Lance groaned again, trying to wiggle in the bed before giving up. So damn cute...

“Fuck... okay... ugh... something smells bad”

“He brought coffee”

Lance tried to sit up straighter again, groaning when he didn’t move. Sleepy Lance was adorable. Adorable and cute. He’d fight anyone who said otherwise.

“Here, I’ll help you”

Modesty went out the window as Coran pulled the sheets down, and slid the gown Lance was wearing up. His boyfriend blushing, though he really didn’t need to. They were all men. They’d all seen a dick before. Squeezing whatever was in the bottle across Lance’s stomach, Keith wondered how the hell this all worked. In the movies it was all about full bladders and having to pee. It was like Coran read his mind

“Now, this is going to be cold. You’re probably not going to enjoy it being cold, but you’re in good hands here. If we can’t get an image this way, we might have to... go up the ol’ pooper”

Lance whined at the thought, Keith sympathetic, as Coran chuckled

“You’ve had plenty of fluids over night. Alright, are we all ready?”

Nope... Keith looked to Lance, who had his bottom lip trapped and bleeding

“Babe, it’s going to be okay”

Guilt flashed over Lance’s face. His boyfriend releasing his lip to take a deep breath

“Okay... do it...”

“Rightio!”

Coran was too enthused... and Keith was lost. Setting everything up was confusing enough to watch, now looking at what looked like grey fish in black, he hadn’t a clue what to look for. He truly was hopeless. Coran kept them hanging, humming and “ahhing” every so often as he’d stop. The wait was killing Keith’s soul. He was surprised it hadn’t flown out his mouth already and left him a lifeless heap on the floor. Enlarging the image on a black dot that looked the size of a coin, Coran smiled happily

“And there is you baby”

Keith blinked, blurting out

“It’s a dot”

Coran chuckled at him

“Lance isn’t far along. 4 weeks if I do say so myself. For a man in a motorcycle accident, you must have been very active”

“Wiggling” his eyebrows, Coran had no shame with what he was implying. Drugs were good. And they’d both been desperate to feel each other... maybe they’d been too enthused... though he was sure they’d used a condom. In his defence, he was medicated and Lance was addictive

“It’s... still there?”

“Yes, my boy. Now, it’s too soon to know if there’s a heart beat. I’m having you stay here where I can monitor you. No stress or strenuous activity until your next scan. We’ll also need to get you on a new diet that’s got all the good things this little one will need. It’ll be a learning curve for all of us, and we’re all a little clueless how this will be for you. I’ve never looked after a male breeder, let alone one pregnant, but I promise to do my best. Now, I need to make some adjustments. I’ll be back to hang a new bag of blood, and bring a little breakfast if you think you can manage it”

“I don’t feel hungry”

“Even if you don’t, your little one needs the nutrients. Is there anything in particular you feel like?”

“Sleeping?”

Coran threw his head back as he laughed. Keith thinking how he’d brought that one on himself. Lance could be bossy when he was sleepy

“You can sleep my dear boy after you and Keith eat. You both need your strength of this little one is anywhere nearly as rambunctious as the pair of you. Still. I suppose I shouldn’t be getting too far ahead. I’m afraid I let the excitement get to me. Whether you choose to keep the baby or terminate the pregnancy is a serious conversation you can’t have on empty stomachs either. I suspect Keith also needs more coffee if he’s going to make an informed decision. Right. Let me clean you up, then I’ll fetch you something for those stomachs of yours”

Left alone by the whirlwind that was Coran, Keith was back on the bed again, Lance having both his hands resting on his stomach over the blankets. Taking his boyfriend’s right hand, he interlaced their fingers

“What are you thinking?”

“That we made a baby”

Keith let out a long breath. He still couldn’t see how that black splodge would turn into a baby. Okay. So he knew babies happened and sometimes they happened despite protection... but now he couldn’t remember if they’d always been careful. Had he come in Lance? Not pulling out in time? He wouldn’t let Lance blame himself. With such bold thoughts, he failed at expressing them

“Yeah... we did”

Someone shoot him. He wasn’t doing this right. Lance rubbed his belly the best he could with his left hand

“Do you think they’ll be okay? I fell down the stairs and I poisoned them without even knowing”

That was a lot of guilt to carry. None of them had thought that a precautionary test was necessary

“I think if they’re as stubborn as you, they’ll be fine. But babe, you’ve got to be honest with me, how do you really feel about it?”

Lance took a shaky breath, squeezing his hand as he released it, needing a few moments to compose himself

“I’m... in shock. I look at you, and you’re like the future... but I can’t see past what’s happening at the moment... and that... I don’t know. They’re in there. A bunch of cells without a face or heart beat... but they’re still there... I love us. I love us so much... yet... I can’t see how... how you’re not mad. I don’t know why you’re not yelling. Why you’re not... why you haven’t run for the hills?”

“Idiot. It takes two to make a baby”

“But it’s inside me. I’m a guy. I like being a guy. I like being your kind of guy. Am I still your kind of guy, if I’m pregnant? And... there’s you. You’re scared. This... this is big. And it’s only going to get bigger. That’s a whole person forming from your stuff and mine... and that’s fucking terrifying. I wasn’t supposed to fall in love, or be happy... and now... how do I explain this? How do I... tell them... without... without them being grossed out?”

“Idiot. You felt the same way about telling them you were a vampire. Things might have awkward, but Pidge couldn’t find it cooler”

“Yeah... Matt had to be so scared. I... I think I need to think about this. You... you should talk to Shiro”

That sounded a lot like Lance was shutting him out. Had he made up his mind? He said he thought he wanted to keep it... and now he wasn’t sure? Did he want him gone so he could get rid of it without him?

“You want me to go?”

“No. I can hear what you’re thinking. You’re thinking the worst of me. You’re wondering if I did it on purpose. I told you I didn’t! I didn’t suspect! I should have, but I didn’t and now I’m thinking I need to fucking think and have a nap, and you’re there writing me off when I was thinking that you should tell Shiro so you had someone to talk to that wasn’t Coran! I can’t fucking believe you! This... we did this together. You said we’d work it out together!”

“How am I supposed to know what to think!? You were covered in blood. All down your legs and your feet. Matt was covered in blood. You don’t want me to go, then you’re saying you need to think and I have to talk to Shiro!”

“Because I want you to really think about this! I want you to have your brother there! God, I’m not sending you off to have him convince you I need abortion, that you think I’m too cowardly to say! I want you to talk to him because he’s your brother and you love him! He’s your brother. Your family... I don’t want you running around having to deal with guilt of lying to him”

He’d fucked this up. He needed to back peddle

“You’re my priority!”

“That’s why I was going to suggest it later when I finally get to take a nap! Honestly, I don’t want you to go anywhere I can’t see, but I want you to be to talk properly with your brother. Lies hurt, Keith. This is... you need to talk with him... this is bigger than us”

Okay. He’d definitely been told

“I’m sorry. I’m still freaking out. You’re not supposed to be stressing. We definitely shouldn’t be yelling. Fuck... I don’t want to leave you here alone”

Lance huffed at him, before hissing slightly as he shifted his weight. Stress was bad. He was stressing Lance out by making him cranky

“I know that. I’m not planning on doing anything without talking to you. I’m just so fucking tired and kind of tender from falling down the stairs at home. I think I must have messed my wrist up and this cast thing is really damn itchy... and I literally don’t have the energy to keep fighting. You don’t have to go talk to Shiro, but I think you should. God. We’re lucky everything is sound proof around here. We’d be in so much shit if Coran heard us”

Thank fuck his mother couldn’t hear them... He had a feeling her liking of Lance would drop the moment she found out. As for talking to Shiro... he knew he had to... his brother was really worried about Lance, but how did he tell him that he’d knocked Lance up?

“If I say I’ll think about it, will I get hit?”

Lance sighed at him, he’d paled a lot with all the yelling he’d done. Normally blood perked him right up. He must be feeling awful not to be letting his ego flare at all

“No. I’m not going to force it on you. I’m not going to force any of this on you. Now, I’m going to try and get as many cuddles in and as much dozing as I can do before Coran comes back”

“Good thing I’m here”

“The best thing is that you’re here. Never forget that Keith. The world is better for having you... never forget that”

With his coffee out of reach, Keith decided he needed to keep his mouth shut. No more upsetting Lance. They had enough to figure out now. A baby. How did... how was Lance even expected to give birth? And where would he live? Their apartment wasn’t baby friendly, but Lance’s house had stairs. Maybe Lance was right and beyond the whole issue of keeping the child, there were a lot more things to work out.

[fragmentedink-archived]

Hell to Pay: Part Nine

I, II, III, IV, V, VI, VII, VIII

cowritten by: @lux-scriptum

A/N: Trigger warnings: graphic smut, character death, characters falling apart, just like normal :)

Fingers tugging at Lev’s hair woke him. He gave a small mmph and tried to lift his head. Nope, nope, couch was much comfier. After grumbling softly, he nuzzled his face against the couch and closed his eyes.

“Levant,” Cameron said, tugging harder.

Lev blinked his eyes open. “Yeah?” he mumbled sleepily.

“Go wake Nik up.”

Lev scrunched his face up. He still pushed himself until he was sitting up, even as he said, trying not to slide back down into a sleeping position, “Why?”

“We’re going shopping before the stores close,” was all Cameron said.

Lev stood, rubbing his eyes. “I would think you could make them stay open if you wanted,” Lev replied sleepily, already headed for the door.

Nik was indeed in bed still. Lev stared for a moment, before crawling into bed with him. He snuggled close, pressing his nose to Nik’s throat. Nik tugged him closer, a purr rumbling in his throat. That was enough Lev went limp, tucking his cheek against Nik’s shoulder.

“Cameron wants us to get up,” Lev murmured. When he didn’t get a response, he tilted his head, squinting at Nik. “Nik,” he tried, ducking his head again and bumping Nik’s chin with his forehead. “Niiik.”

All he got was a soft mrrmp?

Lev groaned softly, and wiggled impatiently. “Nik, Cameron’s gonna be mad,” Lev tried.

“Cameron’s always mad. Sleep.”

“He wants to go shopping,” Lev replied, poking him lightly in the chest.

Nik whined softly, burying his face in the pillow. “But sleeeeep.”

Lev thought he had a very good argument, but... “But Cameron.” He snuggled closer. “You might not be scared of him but I am. Please, Nik?”

“Oh I'm scared of him when it suits me. But fineeeee.” Nik leaned close and kissed him before he sat up, scrubbing his face.

Lev snuggled into the warm spot he left, murmuring sleepily. Definitely more comfortable than the couch. “I don’t have any pants,” he finally said, even as he closed his eyes. “I don’t think the blood’s gonna come out of the jeans I was wearing.” He paused, opening one eye. “Cameron doesn't expect me to wear just his shirt when we go to the store, does he?”

“Honestly, Cam wouldn't care if you showed up buck naked to the store, but you can wear a pair of my jeans if you want.”

Lev hummed softly, and made himself sit up. “Do you mind? I don’t mind being naked for you two, but...” He settled cross legged, tugging absently at the bottom of his shirt. Cameron’s shirt.

“I mean. I guess? Go nuts.” Nik looked him over consideringly. “But you're probably going to need a belt because you're too twinky to fit in my clothes properly.”

Lev blinked. “...twinky?” He finally asked.

Nik shot him a look, but he just slid off the bed and headed for the door. Lev scrambled to follow, sleepiness be damned. He didn’t want to be alone. After a moment’s hesitation he grabbed Nik’s hand, glancing up to make sure Nik was okay with it. Nik didn't seem bothered, so Lev trotted alongside him quietly.

Once they got to the bedroom, Lev glanced towards Cameron, letting go of Nik’s hand. He didn’t get a response, but he didn’t really mind. While Nik headed for the closet, Lev pattered over to the couch, settling down beside Cameron and curling up. He closed his eyes, humming softly.

“Well? Are we going, or did I get woken up for no reason?” Nik’s voice made Lev sit up, blinking rapidly. “This is my smallest pair. See how those fit.” The pants flew across the room, smacking Cameron in the face. The look Cameron shot Nik would have made Lev flinch away, but Nik didn’t seem bothered.

Lev reached over, carefully plucking the pants. He slid off the couch, pulling them on. They were still loose, and too long. As he held them up, he flicked Nik a look. “Do you have a belt?”

Nik scratched his face. “I’m not sure.” He started digging through his things, and eventually turned around, tossing a belt Lev’s way.

Lev fumbled with it and watched it hit the ground. Whoops. He crouched to get it, huffing out a pained breath. Once standing he threaded it through the belt loops. It held his pants up, anyway, though he sat down right after, blinking hard. Bending down was not fun. He should probably not do that again.

By the time Lev didn’t want to cry because of his back, Nik was dressed. Lev couldn’t help staring at the amount of stomach the shirt revealed. Cut off shirts like that shouldn’t be allowed. It wasn’t fair. Nik met his gaze, a grin creeping across his face. “Yeah. I know.”

Lev flushed, and looked down. Staring wasn’t polite. Right.

He didn’t get much time to wallow in his embarrassment. Cameron was already standing, grabbing his keys as he went. Lev scrambled up, wincing. He was ready to go then.

---

The store was massive. Lev felt lost the moment he stepped inside. It was massive, and... mostly underwear. He glanced around, and then looked to Cameron and Nik, trying not to look too confused.

Nik looked around. “You know, I didn't think you knew what an underwear store was considering neither of us own underwear.”

Lev made a small, choked sound. “So... there’s no actual clothes here?”

Cameron ignored Nik. “You need socks and underwear first. Neither of us have any you can use.”

“Oh,” Lev managed. He eyed a display. “Is there anything less... lacey?”

Cameron didn’t even say anything this time. He just headed away, sliding down an aisle. Lev skittered after him, glancing back to make sure Nik was also tagging along. Satisfied that he was, Lev hurried to keep up.

He paused, touching Cameron's elbow lightly. "I- what about that?" Plain old boxers. Or as close to it as he thought he’d get here. Simple. Easy. They could move on to something less distressing. Like pants. Or hoodies.

“Do you actually like those or do you just want out of this store as fast as possible?” Nik asked.

Lev blinked at him. “...Can both be true?”

Nik sighed loud enough Lev winced. “You need better taste. But. Yeah.”

Lev watched him wander off, and then picked up several in dark colors. Good enough. He glanced at Cameron, gauging his reaction, before scampering after Nik. He found Nik at the back of the store, eyeing a display of collars. He hand one in his hand. Black leather, simple mostly, but there was a single metal ring attached to it. Lev stared despite himself, unable to take his eyes off it.

---

Cameron followed Lev through the aisles towards the back, hidden displays. Nik was already putting a collar around his throat, grinning at Lev. “Stars, I had you pegged from the moment I met you. I bet you are a kinky little shit, aren’t you.”

Whatever Lev’s response was Cameron didn’t hear it, he was too focused on also staring at the band of black leather around Nik’s neck. Cameron looped his finger in the metal ring and jerked Nik closer to him. Nik stared up at him, the grin on his face disappearing and eyes like liquid night.

Cameron’s eyes dropped down to the curve of Nik’s mouth, and the two studs that sat on the left side of his bottom lip. He had the urge to bite down on Nik’s bottom lip, but he refrained and pulled back. “Are you getting that?” he asked, in a cool tone.

Nik stared at him, blinking hard. And he growled, more frustrated than genuinely pissed. He pointed at Cameron. “No one likes a fucking tease.”

“You do,” Cameron reminded him. “So does Lev.”

Lev’s face flushed gold, but Nik looked moments away from killing Cameron; he supposed Nik was getting antsy after not being fucked for the last few days. “That-” he cut himself off. “Whatever. Yes, I am getting this. And you are buying it. For emotional damage, you prick.” Lev went over to the displays, looking through them quietly.

Cameron said to Nik, “Last I checked, I already buy all your shit. So.”

Nik ignored him and went after Lev. He picked out a few different collars and put them in front of the omega. “What one do you want?”

Lev’s cheeks darkened and he spluttered for a moment before picking out the simplest black one, just thick enough to grab onto and tug. He looked at Cameron with wide, gold eyes. “Is this okay?”

Cameron shrugged. “I’m getting Nik one, I don’t see why not.”

He was not a single bit surprised by Lev’s likeness to collars. He had been a whore for centuries. He knew kinks when he saw them. Lev looked back down at the material in his hands, rubbing his thumbs across the leather. A small smile tugged at his mouth. “Okay,” he said, in a small voice.

“He’s getting Nik three,” Nik said, swiping two other collars.

Cameron’s brows furrowed. “Two.”

“Three.”

Cameron looked at him, sternly. “And how are you going to earn that?”

Nik grinned impishly. “Same way I always do.”

Cameron hummed, considering that. “Fine.” He said to Lev, “Finish getting your things so we can move on to actual clothes.”

Lev fiddled with the collar still in his hands. “Should- do I need to earn this…?”

Cameron blinked at him. “Do you want to earn it?” He hadn’t intended for Lev to earn it the same way Nik was. Nik was being intentionally difficult and Cameron needed to put him back in his place. Lev barely had a single difficult bone in his body.

Lev was quiet for a bit, looking down at the collar. “A little, yeah.”

“Alright.” Cameron’s eyes were following Nik through the aisles. It wasn’t hard, they were the only ones here. “Finish finding what you want. No limits.”

Cameron didn’t wait for Lev to stutter out an answer and followed Nik back through to the changing rooms. He followed Nik into one of the rooms, keeping the door slightly open. Nik looked slightly confused, but mostly amused when Cameron pressed him to the furthest wall. He hooked his fingers in the collar still around Nik’s throat, feeling Nik’s heartbeat pick up against his fingers when he leaned forward. “Don’t touch me,” he murmured.

Nik nodded slightly, hands going behind his back and Cameron kissed him hard on the mouth. The staccato in his chest was unwanted. He didn’t like the feeling of wanting. But he didn’t have much of a choice with Nik. Cameron dragged a low moan out of Nik’s throat when his fangs scraped against Nik’s lips, when his fingers hooked into Nik’s jeans.

Nik was already half hard against his thigh, and the arousal in his scent was thick enough Cameron could almost taste it. Cameron propped his arm against the wall beside Nik’s head, pressing deeper into Nik’s mouth. He could taste the nicotine on Nik’s tongue, feel the cool metal of his piercings. Nik’s hips pressed into him, for some kind of friction. Cameron pulled back slightly and looked down at him with a slight heaving chest. “I bet you want me to fuck you in this room, don’t you,” he murmured.

Nik bobbed his head, swallowing in air. There was a desperate glint in Nik’s eyes that had a smile curving Cameron’s mouth. “Such a slut,” he said. “But it’s been a few days, hasn’t it.” He was almost certain he had imagined the small whine from Nik. He leaned forward, slipping a hand down Nik’s pants.

He could feel the slick against Nik’s toned thighs.

“Hmm.” Cameron put two slick covered fingers in Nik’s mouth. “How desperate are you? Show me.”

Nik sucked eagerly, near black eyes lidded and locked on his. Nik had dropped down to his knees when finished sucking off his fingers, eyes raking down Cameron’s torso to the tightness in his crotch. Nik licked his lips and had went to move his hands when he looked back up at Cameron. “Can- do I have permission to use my hands?”

“Do you?” Cameron asked. “I don’t remember saying you could.”

Nik sucked in his bottom lip, eyes going back. “No,” he mumbled.

Cameron slid his fingers in Nik’s hair and shoved Nik’s face where it belonged. “Go on, then,” he purred. “Get me ready.”

Nik turned his eyes up to his while he worked around the outline pressing against Cameron’s pants. Cameron bowed his head, pressing it to the wall. He was already half hard and it didn’t take much for Nik to be able to use his teeth and tongue to free his cock. The gods knew Nik used his mouth often enough, he might as well use it for something important.

Nik nearly sat on his hands as he leaned forward. He started from base to tip; an eager lick to get Cameron harder. Nik flicked him a look for approval and was awarded with a, "Good boy, keep going."

Cameron's eyes fluttered shut when Nik returned back to his task. His small licks graduated into taking Cameron's cock down to the back of his throat. Cameron's soft moan only encouraged Nik further. He licked and kissed everywhere; his cock, balls, thighs. Cameron's heart picked up in his chest and he let himself sigh into it. When he was thoroughly prepped, Cameron jerked Nik's head back. "Stand up and pull your pants down."

Nik moved with that lightning quick immortal speed amd had his jeans down to his ankles in a blink. A smirk formed on Cameron's mouth. He brushed his hands down Nik's sides and he flipped him so Nik was pressed to the wall. He pinned Niks arms behind him. "If you touch yourself," he said, lips brushing Nik's ear, "I won't touch you for a week. Understood?"

Nik whimpered as he dropped his forehead against the wall. "I understand," Nik said, in a tight voice. "Please just fuck-"

Nik's complaint was cut off in a strangled moan at the first brush of Cameron's tongue against the small of his back. Cameron was sunk down to his knees, fingers spreading Nik’s legs apart. The sweet scent of slick filled his nose when a finger slid easily in Nik’s hole. He was clearly past the point of desperate. If Cameron had left now, Nik most definitely would have killed him in his sleep.

Cameron licked down from Nik’s spine to the base of his cock and added another finger. Nik’s moans grew louder with each lick and kiss. They could hear the omega in the main part of the store, most likely. Cameron would have liked to see if any of the workers had the balls to actually come tell them to stop.

Nik jerked when Cameorn bit into the meat of his ass. He left dark bruises on Nik’s golden brown skin, drawing closer to the hole his fingers were stretching out. Nik’s fingers were white knuckled and trembling fists. The abandoned, dripping cock between Nik’s legs was begging to be touched. Cameron had no intention of giving into Nik’s want. He wanted to earn those collars, he was going to make sure he was paid in full.

Nik’s hips trembled and he pushed back into Cameron’s face the closer he got to Nik’s hole. Nik was clearly not interested in smothering his voice whatsoever. Not that he could. Cameron still had Nik’s arms pinned in place. “Cameron,” Nik said, half growl, half whine. He cursed in Spanish, back arching at the first brush of Cameron’s tongue against the soft puckered skin.

He removed his fingers, one by one and Nik was grinding, trying to get Cameron closer. He pressed the butt of his heel to Nik’s back and pushed him back against the wall to get better access. He went at Nik’s hole until Nik’s entire body was trembling. Only then did he get up and line up his dick.

Cameron buried his fingers in Nik’s hip, his teeth in Nik’s shoulder and pushed the full length in Nik. Nik choked on a strangled breath, but took all of him greedily. Blood coated Cameron’s mouth and he could smell nothing but himself on Nik. No one would be able to mistake that Nik was not his.

Cameron continued his assault on Nik’s ass, dragging every moan and groan he could out of Nik before he brushed his lips against Nik’s ear. “Want to come?” he asked, slamming his hips forward. Nik dropped his head into a nod. Cameron reached around and gripped the base of Nik’s cock, drawing a squeak from Nik.

“Bastard,” Nik said through gritted teeth.

Cameron smiled and tightened his hold. “That wasn’t an answer,” he said, drawing his hips back. He could feel his knot forming.

Nik sucked in a breath. “Please?”

He slammed into him again. “Please what? Use your words.”

“Let me come? Please, let me come,” Nik rushed out. “I want to come.”

“Do you?”

“Please.” Nik’s voice broke. “Please. Please. Let me come you fucking prick.”

Cameron clicked his tongue and pulled back. “Well, now I don’t think I want you to.”

Nik full on whimpered. “It slipped out. Please? I'm-” he half sobbed. "Please.”

I’m sorry, is what Nik almost said. Cameron knew he pushed a line and removed his hand. He slipped it down between Nik’s shoulder blades, as… soothing as he knew how. It probably felt as awkward for Nik as it felt for him. “Come for me.”

Nik nearly melted against the wall as his orgasm barreled out of him. Cameron thrusted his hips, his own orgasm following. He pressed a kiss to the healing bite at Nik’s shoulder and unpinned his arms. Cameron carefully moved them to the floor with Nik settled in his lap. He let Nik lean back against him, and guided his chin so he was facing him. “Look at me,” Cameron said.

Nik lifted his eyes so he was looking at him. Cameorn could see the tears lining Nik’s lashes and the bloodshot surrounding his dark brown irises. He wiped them away from Nik’s cheeks and kissed him softly. Nik hesitantly kissed him back, hand slipping back around Cameron’s neck. They had been kissing for a few minutes when the door pushed open slightly. Lev looked hesitantly inside, taking in the mess and Nik’s face. He took a single step towards Nik in alarm when Cameron growled at him.

Lev halted in place, eyes wide. He twitched back a step, eyes falling to the ground. “Sorry-”

Nik flinched.

“Get. Out,” Cameron ordered.

Lev turned around and cracked the door behind him, assumingly going back to the main part of the store. Cameron turned his attention back to Nik, whose face was now pressed in Cameron’s neck. Cameron brushed his hand down Nik’s arm and wrapped himself around Nik as best as he could. He gently pressed his teeth in Nik’s shoulder, knowing it would help cement him in the now. “You did good,” Cameron said. “You’re okay.”

He wasn’t sure if he was even being any kind of helpful. Generally, he wouldn’t care about making someone cry, but he wasn’t going to let Nik of all people fall into Sub Drop. Nik looked up at him and Cameron kissed him again.

-----

Lev had settled on the ground beside a display, a careful distance from the changing rooms. Close enough he didn’t feel unsafe. Far enough away for the same reason. He had his careful stack of boxers and socks, and the collar he’d spent the last half hour or so debating if he should put back. Nothing here really caught Lev’s attention, and so he waited, dragging his thumb over the smooth leather and trying not to keep looking towards the changing rooms.

When Nik and Cameron finally emerged, Nik was wiping at his face. Cameron had an arm around Nik’s neck, keeping him close. Something definitely happened, though what Lev couldn’t begin to guess. Lev straightened from where he’d been hunched, wincing as his back protested.

Neither one hesitated to head over to the register. Lev froze, confused. Something cold crept through him in the second it took for Cameron to flick him a look and jerk his head in a silent order to follow. Lev stumbled to his feet on legs still asleep, holding his things in his arms awkwardly as he trotted after them.

He kept his gaze on the ground while Cameron paid. The poor cashier looked more afraid than Lev, which was saying something. Though Lev supposed, not everyone was comforted by Cameron’s presence like Lev was. Or usually was. Lev kept flicking Cameron a wary look, trying his best to gauge Cameron’s mood, watching every movement to be sure Cameron wasn’t upset. He didn’t seem upset, but-

Lev jerked his gaze back down to the ground when he accidentally locked gazes with Cameron. Once everything was paid for, Lev gathered up the bag, and skittered after Cameron and Nik. He kept distance between them, and fought not to jump when Cameron spoke.

“Where do you want to go next?”

Lev blinked. Why was he getting a choice? “I just need... a couple pairs of jeans and a hoodie? I don’t... I don’t need anything fancy, just- just not falling off of me.” He didn’t mind it when it was just Cameron and Nik, but out and about he just felt... scruffy.

Nik spoke up, naming a department store so quiet Lev shot him a look. Cameron seemed to know what Nik was talking about, because his steps didn’t falter. Lev ducked his head again, following after them through the mall and into a store Lev had never set foot in before. It looked... expensive. He had to skitter to catch up after pausing in the doorway.

He continued to flick Cameron glances as he scooted towards the first display of jeans he could find. Nik still seemed quiet, and Lev didn’t like it. He didn’t like it one bit. With that in mind, Lev was convinced he needed to get this done fast so they could get home. That was the plan, anyway, but he paused when he realized the price tags on the cheapest pair were astronomical. He whipped around, staring at Cameron and Nik both.

“This place is too expensive,” he protested.

“Does it look like I struggle with money?” Cameron asked flatly.

“No, but you shouldn't be spending that much on me," Lev said, unable to meet Cameron’s gaze.

Nik’s sigh only made him wince. Cameron just said, “Stop talking and get what you want.”

Lev stared at him, pressing his lips together. What he wanted was to stop being such an obstacle for everyone. He looked down, dragging his fingers along the seam of one of the smaller pairs.

“If you don't, I will do it for you and you probably won't like what I get.”

Lev glanced up, before looking down again. “Okay,” he said faintly. Despite himself his shoulders hunched. Still, he snagged a pair that looked close enough in size, and then looked around for the changing rooms. “I’ll try these on real quick.” And then he could see about getting a new hoodie and call it a day. A night. Whatever.

Once he’d said that, he scampered off. He couldn't tell if it was better or worse to have a door between him and Cameron. He tried them on, only to blink when they settled far, far too low on his hips. After checking the size of the pants he’d borrowed from Nik, he realized the ones he was trying on weren’t even that much smaller than those. His bottom lip trembled. He didn’t want to go back out there and stare at sizes until he figured out what he should be wearing. This was so much easier when he was alone. Less stress. He felt like he was holding them all up.

It took all his self control not to sit down and have a good sniffle. He’d certainly feel better after, but crying seemed to make Cameron uncomfortable, and Cameron was already making Lev skittish.

With that in mind, Lev let them dop and wiggled back into Nik’s, pulling the belt tight. He slipped out of the changing room, head down as he scooted past Cameron and Nik. “Too big,” he mumbled, guilty, and not really sure why.

He picked more than one size this time, and slid back into the changing room. At least this time he managed to pick one of the right size. Good enough. He folded the rest so he could return them, and tucked the one pair he intended to keep under his arm.

Once he’d put the others back, he padded back over. “Hoodies next?” he tried.

Nik frowned at him, but it was Cameron who said flatly, “How many pairs do you have?”

“Just the one,” Lev admitted.

“Get three more.”

Lev opened his mouth to argue, and then snapped it shut again. Making eye contact was impossible, so he mumbled at the pair in his hands, “I don’t need four, though.”

“Fine. Five more.”

Lev flushed, closing his mouth again. Was Cameron being petty on principle now? He pressed his lips together, rather than argue, but when he glanced up, Cameron’s mouth quirked.

“Six.”

Even Nik was smiling by now. Lev wanted to cry, but he turned away instead. He’d stopped arguing and he was still losing that argument. Better to just go grab the rest. Before he got far, Cameron’s voice made him turn back.

“We’ll be right back.”

They were walking away before Lev could reply, so Lev turned around and reached for a few more pairs. Cameron wanted him to get six more, he’d get six more. He had them gathered up in his arms by the time Cameron and Nik returned with a cart. Lev eyed it, his heart sinking. Cameron definitely planned on getting him more things.

After Lev dropped the jeans in there, Cameron leaned over. It took Lev a few seconds to realize Cameron was... counting them?

“I got more, like you said,” Lev said, trying not to sound defensive.

Nik spoke up, shrugging. “Its habit.” Nik’s voice was very quiet, and that didn’t do anything to soothe Lev.

Lev flicked him a look, before ducking his chin. “Okay,” he said. He fiddled with a tag on the jeans, and then said hopefully, “Hoodies?”

“Levant, you need shirts.”

That was true, Lev had to admit. Like. One or two. He couldn’t keep wearing Cameron’s. While the size difference wasn’t near as large as it has been with Silas, he still was much smaller than Camereon. “Hoodies after?” He asked.

Cameron gave him a dry look. “If you stop being difficult.”

Lev blinked up at him. He supposed it depended on how badly he wanted hoodies. Which, admittedly, was pretty badly. He nodded meekly, and then headed off in search of shirts. They weren’t far. He turned to Cameron and Nik for guidance.

“What- what kind of shirts- how many do you want me to get?” He asked finally.

“I don't care what you get as long as they fit. And five.”

Lev chewed on his lip, thinking. “Is that a hard number? No more, no less?”

“You can get more if you want. But no less,” Cameron replied.

Lev considered that, and then nodded slowly. He moved deeper among the racks and displays. His nose wrinkled at a few of them, but he found a few that he liked. Long sleeve and short, and they came in a few different colors. He turned back, seeking out Cameron to make sure what he had in his hands were okay.

Cameron was still keeping Nik tucked close, head bent close as he spoke to Nik. When Lev came closer, though, Cameron looked up. “Good. Now go get a few hoodies.”

Lev perked up at that. “I only really need one,” he said happily as he dumped the shirts in the basket.

“Get two,” Cameron said.

Lev paused, but he knew better than to argue this time. He nodded slowly, before skittering off. As much as he struggled to let Cameron buy him things, he was genuinely excited to get his hands on a hoodie. He felt naked without one. And, honestly, his favorite hoodie hadn’t been cheap either.

He took his time this time, running his fingers down the sleeves, sliding them in the pockets, humming softly as he wandered. He eventually pulled a soft black hoodie down. After checking the size, he tugged it on, zipping it up. Yeah. Definitely a good fit. Just a little large, but he liked them like that.

He reluctantly shrugged out of it. He set it in the basket, trying not to look too disappointed. He could wear it later, when they got home. After they paid at least. Cameron has said two, though, so he turned around, and found another in the same color and size. He’d found what he liked, and there was no reason to stray from that.

“Do I need anything else?” He asked.

Nik was staring at the hoodies Lev had set down. “You are somehow the easiest and the hardest person to shop for.”

“I-” Lev cut himself off. “I don’t mean to be?”

“It's fine. Let's get some food and go home.”

Cameron’s even tone was enough Lev relaxed a little. “Home sounds nice,” he said carefully.

“Both you and Nik haven’t had dinner,” was all Cameron said. “So you’re eating.”

“Okay,” Lev said faintly.

He was definitely wearing one of his new hoodies, though. As soon as it was paid for.

---

Nik forced himself into the car. The windows were rolled down instantly and he slumped against the seat and stared out the window while Cameron drove and Lev sat quietly in the back. He absently chewed on his bracelet while Cameron drove the fifteen minutes to a small Mexican restaurant. Nik perked up a bit and looked at him.

Cameron didn’t look at him, but he knew the gesture was for him. He honestly wasn’t that hungry, but he had to eat something. Cameron wanted him to eat, even if it was a little. Especially if Lev hadn’t eaten. Lev had put on some weight, but it wasn’t enough to satisfy Cameron. “Come on,” Cameron said, getting out of the car.

Nik had followed after him, and slipped under Cameron’s arm, nearly gluing himself to his side. Lev was on Nik’s other side, pushing down the sleeves of his new hoodie. Nik went in first to the restaurant, looking for the exits and windows when he went back for his usual booth under a bay window.

Cameron and Lev took the seats to either side of him. Nik took the menus from the waitress who came up soon after they had taken their seats. She smiled at him. “Hey.”

Nik ignored her and looked down at his menu. He looked to see Cameron’s pale eyes already locked on his. “One thing,” was all Cameron said.

Nik nodded and looked back down at his menu. He knew this menu like the back of his hand, and he also knew not to argue with Cameron. Nik picked a mediumish dish, knowing if he had gotten the smallest Cameron would make him get two. It was warm and not as harsh of a palette that Nik usually got, but it was still comfort food. “That.”

Lev looked at his menu before picking something of a similar size, but still far more mild than what Nik got. He flicked Cameron a look to see if it would suffice, and when Cameron dipped his head into a slight nod, turning back to his own menu, Lev loosened.

Cameron ordered the same thing as Nik, clearly not caring about what he ate, one way or another. They sat in comfortable silence waiting for the food to come, listening to the chatter of the people around them. Nik just wanted to go to bed.

Preferably with Cameron, but that was going to be a hit or a miss. If Cameron slept with him, he was either going to be in his demon form or just not touching him at all. And he didn’t want either of those.

The food came and Nik dug in. Warmth lit him up on the way down and he unthawed bit by bit. That was probably Cameron’s intention bringing him here, anyways. But he figured the faster he got done, the faster he could go home. Between wanting to be in bed, and wanting his face in Cameron’s neck, hunger and food was not high on his to-do list.

Lev nibbled at his food, eyes darting from looking down, to Cameron to him. Nik could tell Lev wasn’t sure what happened, and Nik wasn’t sure really what had happened either, except he had crumbled and now Cameron was glued awkwardly to his side.

Nik slid back into his seat watching out the window while Cameron and Lev ate. It was later in the day, the sun was coming down, but still daylight enough that people were out and about. He honestly didn’t care. He looked at Cameron when he heard his name spoken with an annoyed edge. “Yeah?”

“Are you done?”

“The plate is empty, is it not?��� Nik said, sharply.

Cameron’s mouth twitched and Nik couldn’t tell if it were into a smile or a frown. It could go either way with Cameron. “Lev?” Cameron asked, eyes still resting on Nik. “Are you done?”

Lev nodded. He had finished off three fourths of his plate and Cameron must have considered that good enough, especially since Lev hadn’t seemed all that eager to go out and eat in the first place. Cameron slipped a couple of bills on the table and stood. “Let’s go, then.”

Nik let Cameron hook his arm around Nik’s neck and pull him in. It took all his willpower to not just climb on him and bury his face in Cam’s neck. It would be better than walking and Nik was tired. But he managed to get in the car with his seatbelt on, if only because Cameron wouldn’t drive otherwise.

They got back to the house and Cameron ordered the sentries to take the bags inside. Cameron let Lev out of the backseat before coming over and getting Nik. “You need to get cleaned up,” Cam said, tone leaving little room for argument.

Not that Nik could form one. And he did feel a bit… stiff. And warm. He was probably getting too rundown and his body was taking it out on him. Lev was still keeping his distance into the house, even if he did sneak looks at them. Nik would think more on it, if he didn’t just want Cameron. Hooking Cam’s arm around his neck, Nik looked at Lev. “Sorry your day turned out sucky.” He hadn’t meant to feel like he got steamrolled by a semi.

Lev blinked at him. “It didn’t.”

Cameron stiffened slightly when Nik quickly kissed him. “I’ll make it up to you eventually. But we got a thing. Rain check?”

Lev seemed a bit confused, but he just nodded. “O- Okay.”

Nik turned them around and nearly drug Cameron with him to the washroom. Cameron didn’t say a word as he mechanically pulled Nik’s clothes off him. It wasn’t his fault that they were sticky. But.

Cameron got him in and out of the tub in record time. Nik had been too concerned with staring at the water droplets that lined Cameron’s white eyelashes to do much talking. Either way, Cameron seemed more concerned with getting Nik clean than to strike up a conversation. Neither of them really felt like talking about earlier. Good thing neither of them were the type to really talk about feelings.

Cameron had gotten them out of the tub and toweled off and in Cam’s bedroom when Nik stopped him from leaving. Cameron stared him down stiffly when Nik came up to him. “Will you sleep with me?”

Cameron arched a brow. “I always sleep with you.”

“No,” Nik said, “you don’t. Not really. Unless you’re in your demon form.”

There was almost a minute change in Cameron’s face. “And if I don’t?”

Nik ignored how his omega whined. Now was not the time. “Then nothing. I don’t do ultimatums with you. But… ” How the fuck was he supposed to tell Cameron that all he wanted to do was bury his face in his neck when he didn’t even really get it either. And he can’t do that if Cameron is sleeping a mile away from him. “I… need you to.”

He wasn’t trying to make it sound like he was manipulating Cameron into doing what he wanted. He wasn’t that much of a tool, but he didn’t know how else to get Cameron to sleep with him. Cameron slowly nodded, anyways. “Okay.”

Nik bit back his sigh of relief. Good. That was. Good. His omega was nearly giddy, it was as annoying as it was distracting. Before he could talk himself out of it, he hooked his hand around the back of Cameron’s neck and tugged him down gently. Cameron turned his head slightly, pale eyes on his, but he didn’t pull away. Nik took that as permission to keep going. Nik kissed him softly, inhaling Cameron’s scent deep into his lungs.

Cameron, despite feeling like a wire drawn taut, kissed him back, his long fingers brushing the small of Nik’s back. Nik knew that today was an anomaly but he was going to make as much of it as he possibly could.

---

Lev watched Cameron and Nik until they were out of sight, and only then did he slip into his room. The sentries had indeed dropped his bags off, and he was left to do with them as he wished. Which... at the moment was staring sadly at them, wondering why the fuck Cameron was being so generous. Was it pity? Lev didn't need to be told he was pitiful. He knew. His back reminded him every time it throbbed, which was often. His tears reminded him every time they fell, which was pretty damn often. His fear reminded him every time anxiety twisted him up inside, which was pretty fucking often.

What was he even supposed to do with the bags? Unpack them? Cameron had told him he wasn't going home. That seemed to imply Lev was going to just stay here indefinitely, which implied there was an expectation that Lev could move in, but somehow putting clothes in drawers seemed too... permanent to Lev. What if Cameron changed his mind? What then?

It all seemed like a very silly thing to get worked up over, but Lev was tired, and his back hurt, and he so desperately did not want to be alone. He stooped to grab the bags, hissing painfully at the motion, and forced himself to walk over to the dresser. He unpacked everything, carefully taking all the tags off. There. Now they couldn't be returned. Now he had to accept Cameron had spent far too much money on him.

Once he was done, there really wasn't much else to do but ease Nik’s belt free, letting the pants fall to the floor, before he crawled up on the large bed to wait. For what, he wasn't sure. Despite the fact his eyes burned and his chest was tight, tears wouldn't come. The pressure was growing every time Lev closed his eyes, and he didn’t know how to stop it.

He tucked his cheek against the pillow Nik had slept on earlier, chasing Nik’s scent. He didn’t want to be alone, didn’t like how his thoughts raced when he didn’t have anyone to distract him. That wasn’t a good enough reason to move, though. Enough time had been spent focused on Lev today. Enough time had been wasted on that. It wasn’t like they were leaving the house. Lev would see them in the morning.

Someone clearing their throat dragged Lev out of his slow spiral. He blinked at Cameron, who was leaning against the doorway, waiting for Lev to look up. "You're sleeping on my couch tonight," was all Cameron said. With that, he turned away and walked off. Lev scrambled to follow, grabbing the pillow Nik'd slept on earlier as he did.

He discovered Cameron really had set up the couch for him. After pausing in the doorway and watching Cameron get on the bed with Nik, Lev made his way over to the couch. The pillow already waiting for him smelled like Cameron; Lev buried his face in it immediately. He could hear the other two settling in the bed, and as long as he slept on his stomach his back wasn't touching anything other than Cameron's shirt, which he still hadn't taken off. When they'd gone shopping Lev hadn't once thought of what he was going to sleep in. Not that he minded wearing Cameron's shirts. It was probably as close to a hug from Cameron as he was going to get.

Lev closed his eyes, rubbing his cheek against the pillow. At least he wasn't alone tonight. He'd been braced for it. Wouldn't have minded, wouldn't have complained. But it was harder to bury himself in the pain and fear when he was focused on staying quiet, on not being a bother. Maybe it was better that way, too.

-----

Nik pressed himself as close as he possibly could to Cameron and buried his face in his neck. He had gotten in Cam’s closet when he went to get Lev and stole one of his shirts. He could count on one hand the number of times he had worn Cameron’s clothes. Their styles were vastly different but right now, he could definitely see the appeal of being surrounded by Cameron’s scent.

He wasn’t sure what to do with his arms. Cameron wouldn’t want his back touched; it was the fastest way to guarantee Cam slept as far away from him as possible. Decidedly, Nik folded his arms between them and got as close as he could. The only way this could be better was if Cameron was actually inside him, but. He wasn’t going to bitch about it.

Nik lightly pressed his teeth in Cameron’s shoulder and nearly melted into him when Cameron’s arm wrapped around him. Even with how stiff Cameron was, Nik had no intention of moving from this spot all night.

------

He wasn’t moving. Fax wasn’t moving. Fax wasn’t moving, and no matter how many times Lev shook his shoulder, he wasn’t going to move again. Lev knew it, and yet he couldn’t help trying anyway, because if he didn’t, he had to admit Fax was gone.

“It’s your fault too,” Remi said from behind him. “You knew the consequences.”

“He didn’t deserve this.” Lev hunched forward, shying away from the hand Remi dropped on his shoulder. “I didn’t deserve this.”

“Yes you did.” Remi’s fingers dug in Lev’s shoulders. “You should not have dated a demon. A beta demon, at that. You knew you were mine.”

Lev shook his head, only to freeze. It wasn’t Fax on the floor anymore. And, stars, Nik should never be that still. When Lev reached for him, because maybe if he shook him he’d wake up, Remi’s fingers dug in deeper, right over where he’d bit Lev earlier, and yanked Lev back against him.

“I claimed you. I bit you. Just because I gave you some leash doesn’t mean I ever relinquished my hold, Levant.” Remi’s breath was hot against Lev’s ear. Between blinks, it was Cameron Lev was staring down at. “It’s time to come home. You’ve strayed long enough, and it’s not funny anymore, little omega.”

Lev twisted, trying to pull away. Remi’s fingers scraped along his back, pulling at the barely scabbed over wounds as-

Lev’s back hit the floor. He cried out, rolling onto his side with a pained sob. It hurt and Lev could still hear Remi’s voice, still feel his hands on his skin. Distantly he heard Cameron getting up, only really knew it was Cameron because he could hear Nik whine. When Lev managed to look up, Cameron was staring down at him. Lev swallowed his apology, trying to catch his breath. He couldn’t read Cameron’s expression, couldn’t hold his gaze either. Instead he dropped his face on his forearms, shuddering.

“Stop crying,” Cameron ordered.

Lev looked up, dry eyed. “I- I’m not. I won't,” he managed.

“Get on the bed. Behind Nik.”

The idea of getting up made Lev nauseous. He pushed himself up unsteadily anyway. He still couldn’t look at Cameron as he winced his way into the bed. He was still trembling as he settled next to Nik. Nik rolled enough to nip sleepily at Lev’s shoulder. The moment Cameron got back into bed, though, Nik was rolling back against him.

Lev scooted closer. He stilled when Cameron said, “Do not move.”

Lev swallowed. He didn’t dare finish settling near Nik. Not moving was doable. Lev didn't usually move in his sleep at all. Usually. Though he wasn’t sure how much sleep he was going to get tonight. Not even Nik right next to him could fully chase away the ghost of Remi’s voice in his ear. At least he wasn’t alone.

@idreamonpaper @incandescent-creativity @solangelo3088 @firesidefantasy @livvywrites @halstudies

[revisionaryhistory]

It’s All Art ~ 92

Oscar fell back onto the couch, closed his eyes, and took a long breath. Letting it out with a sigh, he opened his eyes, “A little better.” He smiled.

Matt laughed, “Aw, you’re worried about my sister.”

He rolled his eyes, “Ooo, there’s a secret.” He looked at Abby and whispered, “Asshole.”

“Everyday.” Abby laughed and kissed Matt’s cheek.

From what the doctors had said Oscar figured they were in for a wait before they could see her, but it wasn’t five minutes before a nurse opened the door. She smiled and pointed at him, “Come with me.”

Oscar jumped up. Matt stood, “Everything a’right?”

The nurse nodded, “Perfectly.” She waited for Oscar to be beside her, “Patients who’ve had a trauma are sometimes disorientated when they wake. She’s just starting to wake up and is a bit restless. Might help if you’re with her.”

He nodded, “I told her I’d be here when she woke up.”

They stopped outside a curtained room, “We don’t usually have family back this early. Waking up can be a little scary for them. I’ll be right there. I promise she’s fine.” She put her hand on his forearm, “You a’right?”

“Better if you let me see her.” He smiled and raised an eyebrow.

She laughed, “Just talk to her.” She pulled back the curtain and let him go in first.

The head of the bed was up at an angle and Charlotte’s arm was in a splint, resting on a pillow. The IV in her other hand was already gone. He waited while the nurse put down the railing on that side before taking her hand and sitting on the edge of the bed. He kissed the back of her hand and held it between both of his. With the contact she shuffled around and made quiet noises. Not quite a moan or a sigh. Oscar rubbed his thumb against her palm, “Hey baby, I’m here. Time to wake up.” She didn’t open her eyes. “Everybody is shoved into a room waiting for you to wake up, so we can take you home. I’m thinking room service for some breakfast. Maybe waffles. I ate something from the cafe here, but you know what they say about hospital food.” The nurse snorted a laugh from behind him. He nodded toward her, “She agrees.” Both were laughing when she opened her eyes. Oscar smiled, “There’s my girl.”

Charlotte shifted a little, “Hospital. Mmm, surgery. How’d it go?”

“Your arm will be good as new.” He leaned in and kissed her softly, “Do you know who I am?”

Fifteen minutes later . . .

Charlotte opened her eyes, looked at her arm, and wiggled her fingers. She glanced up to Oscar, “Surgery go a’right?”

He nodded, “Perfect.” He leaned in and kissed her. “Who am I?”

She looked at him like he was crazy, “Oscar.”

“Who are you?”

“Charlotte.” She said her name slowly and more as a question.

“No.” He shook his head and pressed his lips to her hand, “You’re my everything.”

“Why are you asking me these questions?” Recognition flashed in her eyes, “Oh, I was afraid I’d lose more memories.” She smiled when he nodded his agreement then looked at the nurse, “He’s only saying that romantic stuff because you’re in here.”

The nurse laughed, “He’s said something different each time. Very sweet, your Oscar.”

“Each time? How many times have I woken up?”

She noticed the slight panic, “Perfectly normal to drift in and out. You’re much more lucid this time. Awake now.”

Oscar kissed her again and waited for her eyes to focus on him, “My love, my Charlotte, mi lucero, and my everything.”

“I love you.” Charlotte pulled him closer for another kiss then let go of his hand to wrap it around his shoulders. She broke from the kiss and nuzzled against his cheek, speaking close to his ear, “I can hug you again. No IV to tangle.” She hugged him tighter and he felt her wince then her “Ow”.

The nurse asked before he could, “What hurts?”

“My chest and stomach?”

“Your ribs. Probably didn’t notice last night with all the pain meds. It’s going to hurt to breath, cough, or do anything that moves your ribs.”

She looked at Oscar, “Did we know that?”

He smiled slyly, “I knew, but only because I’ve broken a rib before.”

She swatted at him and looked at the nurse, “Anything else I need to know?”

“I have an aftercare paper for you to take home.” She handed it to Oscar and explained it’s contents. Oscar nodded with each instruction and asked a couple of questions about when they should call the doctor, what was a problem. She reassured them both and made sure they had a phone number to call with questions. “She’s ready to go.” She smiled at Charlotte, “Take it easy and let him take care of you. You’ve been through a lot. Physically and emotionally.”

Charlotte nodded, “Thank you.”

When the nurse left Oscar clapped his hands and stood up, “I’m going to text Matt and have him get the car around then we’ll get you dressed.” After finishing the text he shoved his phone back in his pocket and looked around the room. “I forgot your clothes.” He held up a finger, “Wait one minute. I know where I put them.” He jogged out of the room back to the consultation room they’d been waiting in. Their friends were gathering up their things when he burst through the door, startling them. “Sorry, she’s fine. Awake. Ready to go. I forgot her clothes.” He pointed to the bag and Adam tossed it to him. “Matt, text me when the car’s around.” He was back out the door and jogging into her room.

Charlotte was sitting on the edge of the bed and looked up when he came in, “You look tired.”

He smiled and ran his fingers through her hair, “A little, but I’m good. Don’t worry about me.”

She took his hand with her good one, her green eyes sparkling with tears as she met his, “If I haven’t said it . . . thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” He sat by her, wiping away a tear, “What are these about?”

Shaking her head, she sniffed, “Not exactly sure. It’s an odd twenty four hours. I’m sorry.”

Oscar laughed and hugged her, “No apologies, baby girl. It’s been one hell of a twenty four hours.”

“I love you.” She held onto him with one arm.

“I love you too.” He lifted her chin and kissed her. “Let’s get you home.”

Everyone was waiting by the car to see her. Adam gave both of them a hug and ran off for his call time. Kelsey told Charlotte that she was sitting with her tomorrow and was going to head into work for the afternoon. Jane and Beth were off to work too, but said they’d run by in the evening to check on her. That left Oscar, Matt, and Abby to load in the car back to the hotel. The dropped Abby a few blocks away to fill Charlotte’s prescriptions and pick up some things.

Oscar kept his arm around her to help her walk into the hotel. Her ankle was sore, but she was able to put some weight on. Once in the elevator she leaned against Oscar, “Tired now.”

When the elevator doors opened Oscar handed his card key off to Matt before picking her up. He was careful to hold her against him on the side opposite her broken ribs. “This ok?”

Charlotte nodded and laid her head on his shoulder.

Matt had his master key and opened the door or them. He'd had the room cleaned and stocked the room with all of Charlotte's favorite snacks and drinks. The freezer held several reusable ice packs in different sizes. Not that it was necessary, but told staff if she or Oscar asked for anything staff needed to have it to them immediately.

Oscar asked where she wanted to go before he sat her on the couch, “What do you need?”

“Pillows.”

By the time Abby got there with the pain meds the two men had pillows under her ankle, arm, and behind her shoulders. There was a blanket draped over her and a steaming cup of tea on the side table. Matt was on her, taking the pills. Oscar was on her, taking the first aid supplies into the bedroom. Abby sat on the chair to the right and took her friends hand, smiling, “I'd completely take the piss if you didn't look so horrible.”

Charlotte started to laugh, but stopped herself when there was stabbing pain in the back of her head. “Besides the crushing headache, it's my face which hurts worst. Matt, can I have another ice pack, please.”

“Sure thing, Lottie.”

“Can you not?” She growled at his insistent use of a most hated nickname.

Matt brought her an ice pack, a glass of water, and a trio of pills. “If I don't tease you how will you know I love you?”

Her glare turned to a smile, “Possibly saying the words I love you?”

He nodded, “I love you . .  Lottie.”

Oscar snorted a laugh from behind Charlotte. He put his hands on her shoulders and bent to kiss the top of her head before looking at the other couple, “Mind if I jump in the shower real quick?”

Abby shook her head, “Take as long as you want.”

Oscar headed back to the bedroom, stripping off pieces of clothing once he passed through the door. He rolled his shoulders in an attempt to release some of the tension and the cramps from both sleeping behind her and the less than comfortable hospital furniture. He shoulders felt like he'd had them drawn up to his ears for days, which wasn't far from the truth. He adjusted the water to a few degrees lower than lobster boil and stepped under the spray. Keeping his mind from wandering wasn't so hard. He called on his training to center himself on the moment. The smell of the shampoo, the feel of the water, and the sound of the shower. Three out of five senses was enough to ground him. Once clean he closed his eyes to visualize the water  sluicing down his body and carrying away the tension and concerns. He felt refreshed and dried off.

Back in the living room everyone had food in front of them. He helped himself to the spread laid out on the breakfast bar. He shoved a piece of bacon in mouth as he walked toward the others, “Matt, did you call your parents?”

Matt nodded, “I told them you guys would call when everyone got settled.”

“I think I'll be asleep soon. So tired.” She looked at Oscar, “Will you call them?”

“Or course.” He sat beside her, leaning in to kiss her. He looked back to Matt, “Did you write down what pills she got and when?”

Matt nodded, “Taken care of.”

“Why?” Charlotte looked between the men.

“So no one accidentally overdoses you. Which would probably be me.” Oscar smiled when the others nodded.

Conversation turned to the week ahead as the four ate. Oscar updated her on the phone call with Tabitha and his call times. He'd write those down for her as between the headache and meds he was sure she wouldn't remember. It wasn't her physical injuries that made him not want to leave her. He wanted to be there if she got scared.   Not that anyone of her friends couldn't comfort her, but he wanted it to be him.

Charlotte leaned forward to set her plate on the coffee table, “I think I want to take a nap.” She reached for Oscar's hand, “Stay with me until I fall asleep.” He nodded stood, handing her the quad cane. He kept a hand on her elbow as they walked to the bedroom.

Abby yelled to their backs, “We'll clean this up before we go.”

“Thank you.”

Getting comfortable wasn't easy. Charlotte's ribs ached. They wound up with her on her back supported by pillows and Oscar curled on his side with an arm across her stomach. He was close, but not close enough for either of them. Oscar snaked his hand under her shirt to rest on the bare skin of her stomach, “What can I do for you?” He knew better than to ask if she was alright. No matter her answer they both knew she wasn't. Talking wasn't going to help right now. Right now she needed to sleep and let her body heal.

Charlotte shook a sleepy head, her eyes already drifting closed, “Rest. I'm glad to be home. Safe. All the hospital stuff done. Wish the police stuff was.” She stretched her neck, wincing at the pain in her head. “Nothing you can do. I'll let you know.”

“Anything.”

She smiled, putting her hand on his face, “Promise.” She closed her eyes and within the time of a few breaths was asleep.

Oscar stayed very still. Her hand was still on his face and his hand on her stomach let him feel her every breath. The quiet sounds of Abby and Matt talking as they cleaned up kept him in their bed. When he heard the door latch he put her hand where his was and carefully crawled out of bed. He stood by the door for several long seconds to make sure his absence didn't wake her.

In the family room he picked up his phone to call her parents and found a message from her dad. “Call me when she's asleep and you're alone.” Oscar smiled. Dad needed reassurance about his baby. He hit the call button on his phone and waited for the older man to pick up, “Hey, I was picking up the phone to call you when I saw your message.”

“Thank you. Let me put you on speaker so Alexis can hear.”

A voice that sounded a lot like Charlotte came over the line, “Hello, Oscar.”

“Hey, Alexis.”

Micah took over, “Matt filled us in, but you're the one whose been with her and talking to the doctors.”

Oscar told them everything the doctors and nurses had told him. He explained Charlotte's memory loss, her fear of losing more, and how that didn't happen. He reassured them their daughter was going to be fine. He still didn't see a reason for them to come to London before the gallery opening, but would have Charlotte call them when she woke up. She hadn't wanted them to come and watch her sleep.

“Matt said . . . he said she wasn't sexually assaulted.”

“No, no, she wasn't.”

Alexis spoke up, “If she can't remember how can you be sure?”

Oscar scrubbed his hands in his hair, “There's CCTV video of the attack. I saw it. He just beat her up.” He'd decided unless or until she remembered he wasn't telling anyone else what would have happened. Adam and Eric were enough. He felt bad they'd have to keep the secret. He could hear the couple in Greece breathe a sigh of relief, “She's struggling with not remembering. She's worried he'll hurt someone else, but the police said there's been nothing similar. Likely just wrong place, wrong time.”

“We're going to trust you on what she needs to know.”

Oscar laughed, “We'll deal with it as it happens.”

“Good plan.”

“Keep us updated and take good care of our daughter.”

“I promise.”

[guitypleasure052016]

Redneck Revenge

Prompt: You’re Chib’s daughter from another woman(aka not Fiona). You and your father are very close. You are in your early 20’s, the same age as Jax and Opie who both recently completed their prospect years with Samcro. You are secretly dating Opie but when your father find out, he does not approve. Will Opie be able to prove himself to your father or will you have to choose between the two most important men in your life: Requested by: Anonymous 

 You rolled to the other side of the bed, pulling the blanket over your head trying to force the morning to hold off just a little longer. When you had finally started to fall back asleep after finding that sweet spot in the bed, you heard it, the bellow of your father shouting,

 “Aye love get your ass moving or I’ll come up there and wake ya myself”! You groaned loudly in response, quickly sitting up in bed, knowing that your father would make good on his threat to come wake you which usually involved him flipping your damn mattress. You’d been staying with your dad at his home in Charming for the past two and a half months. You had recently graduated from college and while you weren’t sure exactly where you wanted to be or who you wanted to be, you know you needed to spend some time with your dad before you embarked on your next adventure. When you first arrived, the house was sparsely decorated, but over time, your father had been pulling pictures and mementos from your times together out of storage and putting them up around the house. While you grew up in Chicago with your mother, stepfather, and half siblings, you spent every summer in Charming with your father and he made sure to pack in as much excitement into those summers as possible. It was no surprise to anybody that Chibs Telford was a total softie when it came to his daughter, which is probably why he was currently walking around the kitchen cooking eggs and bacon while singing along to a Led Zeppelin song blaring on the radio. You chuckled as you walked into the kitchen and went over to the brand new keurig machine to make yourself a cup of coffee.

 Your father called out to you “Aye lass, you’ve decided to grace me with your presence”? You rolled your eyes as you plopped down in a kitchen chair, wishing you could hook up your coffee to an IV drip. Your father walked over to you, kissing you on the forehead while dropping a plate overflowing with scrambled eggs, bacon, and two slices of toast slathered in butter. 

You looked up at your father with dismay, “What are you trying to do to me dad? Raise my cholesterol overnight”?

 Your father laughed and patted you on the head, “Well I’m not about to let my little girl go hungry so just hush and eat your darned breakfast”. 

You raised your hands in mock defeat and teased, “I don’t think there’s a chance of me going hungry, or being hungry again until tomorrow with all that you’ve put on this plate dad”! Your dad joined you at the table with a cup of black coffee. 

He took a sip and then looked up at you stating, “Well sweetheart, it might be a late night for me anyway so you’ll be on your own for dinner. Do ya think you’ll be able to entertain yerself”? 

You laughed again and responded, “Dad I’m 22 years old. I’m not a child anymore. I think I can keep myself entertained”. 

Your dad shifted uncomfortably in his seat as he looked up at you before replying, “I know you’re grown now lass but you’ll always be my little girl and I’ll always worry about ya love”. 

You smiled, reaching across the table and grabbing your father’s hand, “I know you love me daddy and I love you too. I promise I’ll be safe and won’t get into too much trouble”, you assured him. Your father laughed, shaking his head as he finished his cup of coffee and got up from the table to prepare for his day. While finishing your gargantuan breakfast, you began making a mental list of all you wanted to get done today. On the top of that list was seeing your man. It was hard to sneak around without your dad catching on so it’d been a few days since your last date. You missed him in more ways than one, and you almost let the sink overflow reminiscing about your last night together. You laughed to yourself and tried to shake your mind free from the thoughts of the two of you together. You dried your hands and headed off to the bathroom to get ready. Gemma would be pissed if you were late.

You pulled your car into the parking lot of Teller Morrow garage and parked it next to the line of bikes. You scanned the bikes but didn’t see your father’s there. You briefly remembered him saying something about business with Jax that morning. You scooped up your bags from the cafe and walked into Gemma’s office. As you entered you saw her trying to sort through invoices while holding Jax and Tara’s son Thomas. Young Abel was coloring on the floor in his own little world. Gemma had offered to take care of the boys since it was summer break and because Tara’s schedule at work had been picking up. She loved getting extra time with the boys however that left little time for her to be able to manage the garage and it was all piling up onto poor Chucky. That’s why you were here. Depending on the day, sometimes she’d have you help in the garage and other days she’d have you watch over the kids. You insisted that you didn’t need to be paid and enjoyed helping out but she would always slip money in your purse anyway and you soon learned it was best not to argue with her. You used some of that money each morning to pick up coffee and bagels for you two and donuts for the little boys. The boys began looking forward to their morning treat which is why they both began to cheer in excitement as you walked into the office that morning. You handed the boys their treats, handed Gemma her breakfast and then grabbed the papers from her desk, telling her to relax with the boys while you got everything set up for the day in the garage. As you were placing work orders on clipboards, you suddenly felt a strong calloused hand wrap around your waist and a bearded chin nuzzle against your cheek before soft kisses were then placed down your neck. You smiled, turning around in the arms of your visitor and wrapping your arms around his neck. You Looked up at your man and kissed him on the lips before suddenly remembering where you were and slapping him on the chest and scooting out of his arms scolding 

“Opie Winston, we’re in the middle of the garage, and if we get caught my dad will kill you”. 

Opie pulled you into his arms once again, chuckling, “Babe it’s 8 am, half the guys are still asleep”, he reassured you “besides I needed to start my morning with a little sweetness” he winked, then planted a sloppy kiss on your lips while grabbing a handful of your ass. 

You rolled your eyes at him and thrust a clipboard into his hands “Get to work Winston. You’re distracting me” you ordered as you restarted the task of sorting the clipboards. It was his turn to roll his eyes,laughing , as he picked up his work shirt and sauntered off to get started.

It was three o’clock and you were already on your fourth cup of coffee. This was turning into the day from hell. Chucky was sick and while he tried to work, you had to send him home after he puked all over a customer’s shoes. You apologized profusely and offered a free oil change but you were pretty sure that was a customer lost. After cleaning up that mess, you were suddenly slammed with a multitude of calls for cars needing towed. Apparently some prankster had used their lunch break to go down Main Street slashing tires which meant lots of angry people and lots of cars needing towed. All the while dealing with this nonsense, you couldn’t help but yearn for some down time with your man. You could tell he was missing you too because while he couldn’t talk to you, every chance he got he would brush by you, sending shivers up your spine and clouding your thoughts with all sorts of naughty things. Normally you wouldn’t mind the flirty distraction but not during this shit show of a day. By the time your dad and Jax rolled into the lot, you were on the verge of having a full fledged breakdown. When they walked into the office they were both alarmed to see you on the verge of tears. Your dad immediately ran over to you, wrapping an arm around your shoulders and brushing your hair out of your face, questioning what was going on that had gotten you so upset. Taking one look at the lot, Jax guessed what had you so upset. He walked over to the mini fridge, then over to you taking the coffee cup out of your hand and replacing it with an ice cold beer. 

“You’re off the clock. Get out of this office and go to the club house” Jax ordered. Your dad straightened up nodding at him in agreement while stating that he needed to go update Clay on some business but then he would meet you in there for a beer.

 Your old friend quickly shot down any protest from you and scooted you out of the office with a wink teasing, “Besides, I think Ope is in there”. You laughed nervously, willing yourself not to blush. You and Opie had never come out and told Jax that you two were hooking up but Jax had guessed as much and being the good friend that he was, he kept his mouth shut. 

 About two hours and 4 beers later, you were playing a round of pool with Juice, Tig, and Bobby when you all heard a commotion outside. Everyone was immediately on alert, and all three guys motioned for you to hang back while they went and checked it out. You waited a couple minutes and after not hearing any gunshots, you decided to venture out and see what was going on. As you walked outside, you noticed a very angry redneck attempting to scream at Gemma but she was having none of it. All the guys were frozen because while they wanted to back up Gemma, they also knew she could potentially get pissed at them because she was constantly telling them that she could take of herself. That all changed when said redneck decided to reach back and slap Gemma across the face in anger. Jax and Happy immediately jumped on top of the asshole beating the shit out of the scum bag while your Dad and Bobby stepped in to check on Gemma. That’s when you noticed Abel’s little head peaking out of the office. You grabbed one of the prospects and hurried over to rush the boys back inside and away from the violence. It didn’t take long for you to get the boys settled down with an episode of Paw Patrol and as you turned around, Opie strolled into the office. The blinds were already closed, so you pulled him to the back of the office quickly out of sight of the boys. He chuckled as he wrapped one arm around your waist, using his free hand to tuck a stray lock of hair behind your ear. You were slightly irritated at his calm demeanor with all the commotion going on and gave him a look that he knew meant that you wanted an explanation. He sighed, plopping himself down in the office chair and pulling you onto his lap.

 “Well apparently the redneck was a victim of the tire slashing earlier today”, Opie explained, “however before he came to pick up his car, Gemma realized it was on of the cars we had gotten a call about repoing. By the time the redneck got to the garage to pick up his car and pay for the new tire, Gemma informed him that she had already called the bank and that we couldn’t release the car to him so he freaked out. Don’t worry though, we took care of him, he shouldn’t be coming back”. You smiled down at him, caressing his face before placing a soft chaste kiss on his lips.

 “I’m honestly really glad you all were here when he showed up. I don’t know what I would’ve done if I had to deal with him myself” you confessed with one hand on his chest, and the other hand absentmindedly running through his hair. 

“Hey Y/N”, he called out to you while taking your face between his hands “You don’t have to worry about that. Seriously babe, I would never let anything happen to you. I promise I’ll always keep you safe”. You looked up at him and saw the emotion behind his eyes. The two of you had never said the “L” word before but this was as close as you had gotten.

 You wrapped your arms around his neck and pressed your forehead against his whispering “I know baby, I know” as you cuddled into your man. He wrapped his arms even tighter around you sighing in contentment. Of course this had to be the moment that your father walked in the door. You heard him before you saw him as your father screamed a colorful array of expletives that were heavily muddled by his Scottish accent that only got worse when he was angry. You quickly jumped off of Opie’s lap trying to find the words to calm your father but it was too late. He had grabbed Opie up out of the chair and dragged him outside to the parking lot. When he got him out to the parking lot, your father threw him on the ground and began punching Opie over and over as hard as he could. You knew that Ope could easily overpower him, being much larger and younger but due to the fact that he literally had no idea what to do he figured it was safer to just lay there and take it until he was done. The rest of the guys quickly ran over confused as to what was going on. It took Jax, Tig, and Happy to pull your dad off and keep him off of Opie who was currently being helped up off the ground by Juice and Kozik. Before anyone had a chance to ask what was going on your dad began screaming

 “That piece of shite, that filthy animal is trying to get in my baby girl’s pants! I’ll kill him”! Everyone looked shocked, well everyone but Jax, and began looking back and forth between you and the two men.

 “Daddy it’s not like that” you exclaimed. 

Your father shook his head “I don’t give a flying fuck what this is but it ain’t happening! I’m putting you on a bus back to your mother’s first thing tomorrow morning” he shouted with pure malice and anger in his voice. You looked back at your father shocked at how angry he had become. Then you looked over at your man who had a mixture of emotions on his face ranging from fear and anger and quickly escalating to panic when he realized that he was losing the woman he had fallen for. 

You looked back at your father while becoming angrier yourself shouting at him “I’m an adult now Dad, you even said so this morning! And while I’m not going back to mom’s you don’t have to worry about seeing me at your house cause I’ll be finding some place else to stay”! At that you turned on your heels and stormed over to your car quickly peeling out of the lot. You didn’t know what you were going to do but you knew you didn’t want to face a lot filled with gawkers. You drove home angry and conflicted. You adored your dad and didn’t want to lose him but you also knew that you couldn’t give up your relationship with Opie. Your dad never cared about when you hung out with Opie and Jax growing up but ever since they got involved with the club he’d acted all weird. You knew the SAMCRO life wasn’t a glamorous one but you didn’t care and it’s not like you and Opie were getting married. You just wanted a chance to see if your relationship could work in the real world besides with a business degree you could find work almost anywhere you moved. You were in the middle of debating what to do when all of a sudden you felt your car jolt forward and your head smacked against the steering wheel. Of course, to add on to this day from hell, you were now in a fender bender. You internally cursed the asshole while gathering your insurance information and exited the car to exchange the information. The second you stood up you knew something was up when multiple guys got out of the car. You went to reach into your pocket to grab your cell phone when all of a sudden you felt a gun barrel pressed against the back of your head. You quickly put your hands up while the man from behind you walked around into your line of sight and you recognized him as the pissed off redneck from earlier. He reached into your back pocket to grab your phone, lingering a little longer than you’d like, and tossed it to one of his buddies. 

“Not so fast princess” he hissed at you, “we can’t have you running off on us just yet but don’t worry we’ll be calling your guys to join us real soon”. You shivered at his words but before you could do anything else, he smacked you across the face with his gun quickly knocking you unconscious.

 “Throw the bitch in the truck. I’m getting my damn car back”, he ordered. 

You came to confused and disoriented trying to remember what had happened. Your head was killing you and you thought you felt dried blood on your face. You went to touch your face when you realized that your hands were tied behind your back. You tried to wiggle your hands loose but the ropes were too tight and stung your wrists. You looked down at your feet. Your shoes were gone and there was an equally tight rope wrapped around your ankles. You quickly looked around at your surroundings. You were sitting on an old dingy couch in a sparsely decorated room. There was an equally dirty arm chair, a couple tables, and countless empty beer bottles and cigarette buttes. You heard your captors talking outside. You tried not to make a lot of noise as to not alert them that you had woken up. You could only hope that somehow your dad or Ope had figured out that something was wrong and were looking for you. 

 Back at the clubhouse all hell had broken loose. About an hour after you left all of the men had received a text from your phone. The redneck didn’t know who was who so he simply sent the text to all the guys. It was a picture message. In the picture you were tied up on the dingy couch but were still unconscious. The angry redneck was posing next to you with one arm draped around you touching your chest and the other hand on your thigh with a disgusting sneer on his face. The picture was captioned “You take something of mine. I take something of yours”. Chibs was so enraged when he received the message that he literally crushed his phone. Thankfully all of the other men had working phones to receive the next message which thankfully didn’t include another horrific picture. The message read “Bring the car and have the trunk filled with $5000 cash if you want your bitch back”. 

Before another phone was broken, Jax quickly called out “chapel now, and prospect let Gemma know that we’re going on lockdown til this shit gets settled so start making phone calls”. The prospect nodded and ran off while all the patched members quickly entered the chapel ready to plan the shit storm that was about to rain down on the assholes who dared to take one of their own.

Your entire body was aching. While you could tell your kidnappers weren’t exactly the brightest out there, they could throw a good punch, something they showed you quite often. You were worried cause the longer you were there, the angrier they seemed and the worse the beatings got. The only thing keeping you going was thinking of the beating these guys were going to get once SAMCRO rolled up. You were hoping that they would arrive sooner rather than later. You were a tough chick, hell growing up in Chicago and being a daughter of SAMCRO you had to be, but you were exhausted and you weren’t sure how much longer your captors would be patient and keep you alive. Before you could finish that thought one of the guys walked into the room with a knife and duct tape. You were terrified and began screaming, certain that this was the moment your life would end. Tears welled up in your eyes as you cursed yourself for the way you had left things with your dad and Ope, angry with yourself that their last memory of you would be you yelling and storming off. You closed your eyes as you felt your whole body tense, preparing for what was to come. You were surprised when you felt your captor slice through the rope around your ankles and felt firm hands placing duct tape against your mouth. 

“Get up bitch, we gotta move” the angry man growled, roughly grabbing your arm and dragging you out of the room and to the front yard. You fell to the ground and clumsily tried to catch yourself even though your hands were bound. You felt your breath begin to quicken and you felt like your heart would beat out of its chest. You’d never been so terrified, trying to figure out what was happening, as your captors fought amongst themselves. Suddenly you heard the rattle of a car engine approaching and you felt the familiar feeling of a gun barrel at the back of your head. You raised your head slightly towards the sound to see what was happening and saw the angry redneck’s car pull up to the little house in the woods. Your dad slipped out of the passenger seat and Opie climbed out from the back. Jax emerged from the driver’s seat and as soon as he saw you covered in bruises, laying in the leaves, with tears flowing through your eyes he wanted to kill the bastards who dared to hurt his friend but he knew that acting rashly would only put you more at risk. However the second he looked at his brothers all he could see was rage in both of their eyes. He quickly jumped around the car having to use all his strength to push the angry men back, reminding them that they needed to stay calm in order to get you back safely. Both men straightened up assuring him that they were under control. Meanwhile one of your captors grabbed you from the ground, pulling you into him with one arm and the other hand putting a gun to your head. One of his buddies shouted out 

“Hey asshats, we gonna do this or what”. All three SAMCRO members shot a death glare his way. 

“We’ve got your shitty car and the moneys in the back now just let me wee lass go ya greazy scum bag” your father barked. You sighed, never feeling so happy to hear your father’s Scottish drawl. 

“You steal my car and you have the nerve to call me a scum bag” the angry red neck accused. You could see all three of your rescuers clench their fists, wanting more than anything to beat the shit out of this monster.

 “Hey we’re sorry man it was a misunderstanding with the bank but here we brought it back, even called the bank and told them we made a mistake and had the wrong car. Your money is in the back packed in duffel bags, why don’t you come look” Jax offered. Your captors quickly conferenced and then nodded, forcing the three bikers to move away from the car while they dragged you along with them to check that everything was in order. You felt yourself begin to relax knowing that soon this whole ordeal would be over. One of the angry rednecks confirmed that the money was all there and that the previously slashed tires had been replaced. 

“You’ve got what you wanted, just give her back to us man” your boyfriend pleaded. You’d never heard such fear and desperation in his voice before. 

“Joe, Mark hop in the car and make sure that fucker starts” the man holding the gun to your head ordered his two buddies. They quickly complied getting into the car and turning it on. The man holding the gun to your head slowly began to back away from you. Then before you realized what was happening you felt a hard shove and you tumbled into the trunk of the car. The man quickly shut the truck and the car peeled away. You heard shouting but no gunshots as the guys didn’t want to risk hitting you. You began to panic screaming and pounding your bound fists against the trunk. Hot tears were pouring down your face as you began hyperventilating. After a couple of minutes you felt the car sputter to a stop. You heard the sound of your captors yelling, soon joined by the familiar shouts of SAMCRO members. You heard a few gun shots and held your breath terrified as to what was going on outside. 

You screamed as the trunk opened only to be met with the concerned face of your father. Even though you logically knew that you were safe, your anxiety was off the wall due to the ordeal and you couldn’t calm yourself down. Your father gingerly scooped you up out of the trunk and placed you feet first on the ground, quickly untying your wrists and gently taking the duct tape off of your lips. As soon as he had done away with your restraints he pulled you into his arms, rubbing your back and whispering to you 

“It’s ok sweetheart I’ve got ye, you’re safe now. We took care of those arseholes”. You tried to calm yourself down and relax in your father’s arms but you couldn’t get past the panic that was still rising inside of you. Your father placed one hand on the side of your face and tilted it up so he could look you in the eyes. He saw that you were still so panicked and sighed,craning his head to see the rest of the guys, he looked at Opie and signaled for him to come over. Opie quickly ran over to you and your father. Your father slowly unwrapped you from his arms and placed you into Opie’s. 

He clapped a hand on Opie’s shoulder and pleading with him “Just help her…please”. The two men exchanged a look and nodded at one another. Opie quickly gathered your face between his two big strong hands and began stroking your cheek. 

“Y/N, baby I need you to breathe with me okay? I know you’re scared but you’re safe now” he reassured you. 

You felt yourself begin to relax and your breathing began slowing down enough for you to speak and the words began to spill out so quickly you didn’t know if you’d ever stop, “How did you guys find me? How did you know he wouldn’t take off with me somewhere? What if they took me and who knows what they would’ve done Ope. They were awful and dangerous and”…. 

“Hey, hey, hey baby stop you’re getting yourself upset again” , Opie interrupted moving his hands from your face to wrap both arms around your waist , “Do you really think we’d give those assholes an escape? A mile or two before we got to the ransom exchange, we drilled a couple holes in the gas tank. Not enough that they would notice, but enough that we knew they wouldn’t make it more than a couple miles….(Y/N) I’m so fucking sorry baby I can’t believe I let this happen”. 

It was your turn to interrupt him “Ope it wasn’t you’re fault at all, it was literally an issue with the shop” you reminded him.

 “Doesn’t matter” , he replied “You’re my girl and it’s my job to keep you safe no matter what”. 

“I’m your girl huh” you questioned. 

“Well unless you don’t want to be or something” he responded suddenly shifting around uncomfortably. It was your turn to gather his face in your hands which was a little difficult due to his beard and the fact that he was a foot taller. You settled for wrapping your arms around his neck. 

“Ope of course I want to be your girl you giant goof. I love being yours and I love you Opie Winston” you declared as you stood up on your tiptoes to kiss your man on the lips.

 “I love you too (Y/N) and I always will. You’re MY girl” he responded. You suddenly remembered that you weren’t the only people there and the rest of the club probably didn’t want to watch you two make out. You turned away from your man and walked over to your dad, tucking yourself under his shoulder and wrapping your arms around him. 

He responded by wrapping his arms around you pulling you into his arms and holding you close as you told him, “I love you too daddy and I always will. You can’t ever get rid of me”. 

“Wouldn’t dream of it lovie. I love ye so darn much. It would kill me if anything happened to ye” he whispered clearly pained at the thought of losing his little girl. 

“Well it’s a good thing I’ve got two strong guys watching my back” you teased your dad. “

What the fuck are the rest of us chopped liver. We all showed up to save ya too (Y/N)” , Jax jokingly chimed in. 

“I’m sorry Jax”, you responded walking over and hugging your old friend, “I’m thankful for all of you, my knights in leather armor…but seriously guys thank you so much for saving me”. 

“Hell doll you’re family and no one’s allowed to mess with the SAMCRO family and get away with it” Tig declared throwing an arm around your shoulder. 

You smiled and looked around at your family and whispered to Tig “Wish me luck”! 

You tiptoed back over to your father and proposed “So daddy, since everyone’s in such a loving mood, ya think you could give me and Opie your seal of approval….pretty please”? 

Your dad sighed and looked between you and your man who was suddenly looking very nervous. “Well I guess I’d be a real arse if I said no huh”, your dad chuckled, running his hand through his hair. 

“Oh thank you, thank you, thank you daddy”! you exclaimed, jumping into his arms and wrapping your arms around his neck. 

“Of course my little love, as long as you’re happy” your father responded. 

“I’ll make sure she’s always happy brother”, Ope called from across the way. 

“I’m sure, but if I ever catch the two of you playing grab ass, I’ll kick your ass, both of ye” your father warned. 

“Sure sure daddy”, you replied pecking your father on the cheek and running over to grab Opie’s hand and calling out to everyone “Come on y’all, I want to go home! Last one to the clubhouse buys pizza”!

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[iknaq]

When the Ball Drops

(WinterShieldShock short - Follow up to the Christmas short May Your Days Be Merry and Bright. In which our favourite super soldiers are really dense and Darcy is in denial.)

‘We still have what little bit is left of the Asguardian wine, we might as well enjoy it. Do you want us to see if T’Challa has any bubbly, Darce?’

‘No, no...my stomach still doesn’t feel g...’

‘Oh, Darcy...’

Steve chased after her and Bucky sighed sadly, grabbing the napkin off the table and starting to wipe up the mess, glancing up when Nat came in an eyebrow arched.

‘Everything okay?’

‘Darcy is still not feeling so hot...it’s okay I got it...no...okay. Thank you.’

Bucky sighed and relinquished the napkin as one of the housekeepers came in and made a fuss, heading to one of the washrooms to clean up, surprised when he came out and Natalia was still there. Rolling his eyes when she immediately started with the rapid-fire Russian.

‘She should have been better by now. Have the doctors come to see her?’

‘No, she refuses, says she’ll be fine in a few days.’

‘Does that look FINE?’

‘No, but...’

‘No, but. Idiots. I will take her.’

‘Natalia!’

Bucky sighed and chased after her as she ran, catching up just in time to see Steve get kicked out of the bathroom.

‘What the HELL, Romanoff!’

‘Stevie...let her do this, she’s worried.’

He was worried too and he hoped that Natalia would succeed where they had failed and convince Darcy to see one of the doctors. When he woke after the doctors had removed his triggers, Natalia had been the one to stay with him those first few days, chasing the other team members off until she was sure he was okay. The team seemed surprised but The Winter Soldier side of him was not, vague memories of his Natalia watching out for the little widows...until they beat that out of her. And memories of watching her watch out for the team as he monitored them before confronting Fury. The execution was sometimes unexpected but there was nothing to do but stand back and accept it when the Black Widow went mother hen.

-

‘Solnyshko, this is more than just a stomach bug. Have you thought about maybe...’

‘No. No, don’t say it.’

Natasha popped her head out of the bathroom and made sure the pair and their enhanced hearing were not in immediate earshot before ducking back in, sitting on the counter while Darcy pressed her forehead to the cool stone tiles of the floor. She knew what Tash was going to say and she’d been worrying about that, as well but she totally couldn’t bring herself to say it aloud yet.

‘Maybe. Okay, but I can’t...they’ll flip out if it is true. I’ll be living in some remote hole in the fucking ground, never to see the light of day and have to live in protective custody for the rest of my life. I mean, it’s bad enough when I’m with Janey if any asshole found out I’d be getting kidnapped every other weekend.’

‘I will watch out for you and we’re safe here for the time being. You need to make sure, if it is true then you need to be under the care of a doctor. At the very least, you need to see one right now and get some fluids in you.’

Darcy was about to argue but she couldn’t stop the gagging and was soon slumped over the toilet bowl once again. She was loathe to admit it but Tash was right, maybe it was time.

‘At the very least, can you ask Wanda? She and Sam are on their way back from the school with Ororo. One or the other but we are doing something.’

‘FINE. Ugh. Can you get my toothbrush or a fucking mint or something.’

‘Language. No need to be snippy. Come on, little sister.’

She tried, she really did but she found herself slumping into Natasha as her crazy spy sister-from-another-mister helped her make her way to the bedroom. The scowl Nat gave Steve and Bucky had them retreating to another part of the palace. They were about to ask for one of T’Challa’s doctors when Wanda came rushing in.

‘Darcy, something is wrong, I could feel your worry from the quinjet.’

‘Yeah, I just...’

They all jumped when Wanda reached out to her and a little charge jumped between their fingers, making them both back away from the shock.

‘What. The. Hell.’

‘Darcy...maybe we should see if Miss Shuri is available...’

‘Um. Yeah, okay...sure. Let’s do this.’

-

Steve scowled and backed Natasha up against the wall when she entered the library, softening slightly when he felt Bucky grab his arm.

‘You better start talking, Romanoff.’

‘Darcy would like to see you both. She’s resting in bed and she said she would like it if we would all join her in your suite so she can celebrate New Years with us.’

He didn’t wait for Nat to finish before he was rushing back to their bedroom with Bucky on his heels. Darcy looked so tiny and pale on the giant bed, curled up with Wanda lying on one side and the Princess Shuri and Queen Ororo sitting on the other side of the bed. His heart pounded painfully when he saw the IV hooked up to her arm.

‘Darce...’

‘Hey...I’m okay, really. Just needed some fluids. It’s almost time, I’m sorry I’m not feeling well.’

He didn’t notice when the ladies disappeared quietly, giving them a moment. Dragging one of the chairs over and taking one of her hands, placing on soft kiss on the knuckles as Bucky crawled on the bed, taking the spot Wanda had occupied. Smiling faintly at Buck as Bucky nuzzled at Darcy and mumbled to her.

‘Worried about you, doll.’

‘I’m okay, I’m going to be fine. I feel a bit better already now that they hooked me up and they’re going to check on me in the morning.’

‘Next time maybe not be so stubborn...’

‘Me, so stubborn? Ha, Mr-Star-Spangled-Pain-In-My-Ass, you would know all about being stubborn.’

Steve couldn’t stop the chuckle, leaning in and kissing her softly. The doctor came back in, removing the IV once the bag was empty and little by little the others filtered in with a brief appearance from their Majesties before they went to join their family for the countdown.

He was surprised when the drawer started ringing, pulling the phone out and answering it after Bucky and Darcy urged him on.

‘Cap.’

‘Tony. Is everything okay?’

‘Yeah. No. I mean everything is fine. I just. I know it was for emergencies or whatever but...I’m not very good at all this touchy-feely stuff.’

‘...Happy New Year Tony.’

‘Happy New Year Steve. Maybe, maybe things might be better in the new year. I’ve been irritating Ross and I think he might be coming around and Pepper got me seeing the head doc again and I just wanted to...I just wanted to say Happy New Year.’

He blinked at the phone when the line went dead, smiling at the inquisitive looks on the others faces.

‘Tony says Happy New Year.’

His heart felt a bit lighter after that and everyone joined in the countdown as the time ticked away, pressing a kiss on Darcy then Bucky when the clock struck midnight.

‘Happy New Year, I love you guys.’

-

Wanda stayed put as Darcy kept a death grip on her hand and Natasha hovered, Shuri and Ororo and the doctors discussing the next steps. She did what she could to calm her sister, chuckling softly when Steven and James were allowed to enter, looking at their nervous faces. They were about to get one hell of a surprise but it wasn’t the one they were thinking of.

‘Hey, guys, want to come take a seat?’

Steven immediately sat down but James paced nervously, she was about to slip away but Darcy never let go, so she settled herself back on the bed. She wrapped an arm around Darcy’s waist and cuddled against her back until the shivering subsided and Darcy was able to take a few deep breaths and speak.

‘So...um. I guess interesting things happen when there is cosmic radiation and a God of Thunder and a uhhh...latent X-gene that comes in to play.’

‘Darcy, are you saying...’

Wanda watched as Darcy raised her hand and made the sparks zap between her fingers like they’d practised that morning. James’ jaw dropping and Steven frowning before he spoke again.

‘But...you’re okay, right? Nothing bad?’

‘Well, I mean this is going to take some getting used to and there’s...’

‘Oh, thank god. We worried you were ill or something horrible and...how did this happen, why so late for you?’

‘Well, the scientists think the radiation from Janey’s work and stuff might have a little bit to do with it but it is more likely the hormonal changes and stuff are the reason why...’

‘Is the radiation harmful, do we need to worry about you working with Jane? Is Jane okay?’

‘Janey is fine, the fact that I apparently have the X-Gene was a part of it and that’s...’

‘But what...’

‘Steven! I’m pregnant!’

Wanda used her powers to catch James before he hit the floor and Steven sat there in a state of shock until Natasha was able to wake James. Now it was Steven’s turn to be nervous and James spoke softly.

‘...Doll...did I hear what I thought I heard?’

‘I’m pregnant. They think the hormonal changes from the pregnancy triggered my mutation. The doctors here are the best and they’re going to be watching over us the whole time and Ororo and Wanda are going to help with my powers. I’m gonna have to have some words with Thor next time he’s here though. I think hanging out with him and Myuh-Myuh might have something to do with my crazy electrical powers. But I’m fine, the babies are fine, Wanda says everything looks good to her and the doctors said everything was okay except for the morning sickness so I need to stay hydrated and they have medicine if it doesn’t let up.’

‘...Babies. Plural?’

This time Wanda couldn’t help but laugh at the soft squeak that came from the scary big bad Winter Soldier. Holding her fingers up and looking at the men.

‘Babies. Two. One from each of you.’

‘How...how do you know?’

‘I felt them. I saw them. I can show you if you want...’

They spent the morning with Wanda using her powers to help them visualise the tiny ones growing in Darcy before she slipped out, leaving the three to bond over the news. There would be more time with her sister later, especially once she told them her news.

Sarah and Rebecca, good names for the little girls, they liked their names to be. Wanda pressing a hand to her still flat stomach, looking down. She just hoped they got along with her Billy and Tommy when the time came.

[decodervon]

disregard the last post.

i made that with a lot of anger and frustration. weve talked a lot since then and I'm... not that angry anymore. I probably shouldn't even be talking with you, but i hate how much it helped.

i hate curiosity. i always scolded you and warned you about looking for things you might not want to find and i did it. i found something i didn't want to find.

i found out you were casually dating again.

and of course you are. i mean. we "broke up" in September. it's been months. theres no reason to feel shameful or bad. I cant fault you and I cant be mad at you. and I'm still mad about some stuff, but that's not one of them.

this one hurts though. i knew i would feel like this, but i hate how much my mind keeps REMINDING ME. I'll be trying to sleep and my mind is like, "u kno she seeing someone right. they prolly banging. its prolly way better then ur tired ass sex. doesnt have to say weird fetish shit." and its LIKE. OK. I GET IT. STOP. STOP REPEATING OVER AND OVER. DONT WAKE ME UP TO REMIND ME.

i heard about it after I went snooping about your party. people said their was distinct body language and he seems to have a very outgoing personality and seemed really nice. it sounds like exactly what you need and IT KILLS ME.

I HATE I went snooping. OF COURSE this is what i get. we've talked since then and i know you feel confused and scared. best thing I could actually do for you is leave you alone and let you have a real chance at it. maybe it's a rebound. but so were we. my evil, manipulative side knows that you still feel emotionally connected to me due to calling me about Vday stuff. my pragmatic side wants to sort out a deal where i exchange emotional support for physical intimacy because I know we both want those things and know the other can give them. i can listen and talk and care about your problems and you could do whatever weird, gross, aggressive sexual stuff and not judge me (I think.) but my less evil/neutral sides know that that would throw a wrench in both our things and the best thing I can do is stay away.

that being said... I dont want to. it's like doing coke or something. like yeah, it's bad. but like. if no one knows... then maybe it's not THAT bad. like it would detrimental to us if we got together and we argued and fought. that would be unhealthy. but just... secreting away and being physical and keeping it hot and fast.. ugh. I mean. its sorta like all those fantasies you helped me with. except we wouldn't be pretending.

ugh. prolly makes me a horrible person. prolly makes US. I know you kind of want to do the same thing. I tried to cool suggest it, but you're probably conflicted about it too. I want you to just... show up late one night. some random text at like... 11pm being like, "I'm outside. should I leave?" and then I mull it over and invite you in quietly. you're wearing something impossibly hot like you do. we hug and I can tell you want to feel my body because it's been so long. we go back to my room and talk awkwardly for a few minutes. we both mention how you shouldnt be here sheepishly while ignoring the fact neither of us are protesting it very hard. you slide off your coat, looking me in the eye the whole time. that longing, sad look. that look that makes it impossible not to kiss you. I pull away after a minute and say, "this is wrong. we shouldnt be doing this." and you lean in close to my ear and whisper "hes not you." and I instinctually press my body against yours. you nuzzle into my neck as you slide your hands under my shirt, around my waist and up my back. I put my hands on your waist and take a deep breath of the smell of your hair. I say, "i dont want to hurt anyone" you said "I dont care." or more likely "no one has to know"... we appreciate each others bodies like we always should have. I go over every inch of you, knowing I might not see it again. you go over those inches of me like they're an old friend you're excited to see. you say all the terrible things I want you to say and I hurt you like you liked to be hurt. we go on for an hour. i want you to stay but i cant ask. my willpower drained with my stress. you fix yourself and disappear like an uninvited vampire. i cry. a lot. i hold myself and wish it was you. the lifetime of memories creeping back onto me. I hate myself for what I've done, but desperately try and inhale your fading scent still lingering in my bed.

ugh. I'm probably gonna end up writing something hot and complete after sharing that. I hate that I want that so bad. but I shouldnt. I have more to lose in this than you do.

you would hate me if you knew what I had been up to since. one of the other reasons I cant judge you for moving on. I've talked and reached out to many people you arent a fan of. not to spite you, but because those people knew me in intimate ways I can trust. I gained insight from talking to them and meeting with them. but that's not what I'm referring to.

im... also.. casually dating someone. it's still all pretty fledgling, as I am WAY too delicate to dedicate myself to anyone. but its... it's someone you know. some things had been happening that neither of us knew about.. and I dont want to tell you because I feel like I'd be cursing you with the same curse that I have. imaging you with that person, not being able to stop... but I know the curiosity is almost as killer for you. its.. a hard thing to figure out morally. but I dont want to jeopardize it. its... it's a once in a lifetime chance. they care about me.. legitimately. and probably more than they should with how emotionally volatile I am right now. but they dont really know how.. I am. part of me is a sweet, great guy. but another part of me is the type to want to have that night I wrote about. a secret trust where we exhaust each other physical and say all the sick things we want, knowing that the other wont judge them. (hell, anything is better than arguing)

I want to be physically wanted... but I want to be wanted by you. I loved when you would love my body. cause like... in my head, when people say things about loving me, I always diffuse it "oh she just thinks she loves me like that" "oh shes convinced herself she likes that about me" "oh she thinks that's cute now, but give it time..." and its just... innate to my awful self esteem. but body stuff? making out with me? going down on me? holding, examining and loving.. parts of me? it feels so much... truer to me. like someone couldnt lie about that. I know thats... naive to think. but that's how it feels. no one who doesnt like you is gonna put their dick in their mouth. bottom line. or go along with your fantasies that you yourself think are strange to be attracted to. i wanted you to want me so bad. i wanted you to love my body and tell me youd been thinking about it. it's such a direct link to my heart.. ugh. but that.. stuff got all messed up. I think that's what made me fall in love in the first year. you cherished my body. you worshipped it. you wanted to sherk your duties to have more of it and I was totally enthralled. that first year made me stay for so long and through so much. always chasing that high. that time where my body was all you wanted and all i wanted was your heart. and it all got so... nevermind.

the person I'm dating.. we're talking it very slow. ive.. kissed her. in fact, your vday call interrupted that kiss. can you believe that timing? thanks universe. if you're trying to say we should get back together, maybe dont kill a beautiful innocent cat next time. I was mad you wanted me to support you through death.. after you abandoned me when I needed your support so bad. I'm still kinda mad. but whatever. this isnt a mad post.

i.. its. shes.. she lets me talk about you. she knows you. maybe better than I did. its hard.. shes not experienced with.. our type of relationship so much. I try not to put much on her. for the reasons of not wanting to overburden her and to keep from forming an instant bond. I know I still have these raw, visceral feelings for you and I dont want to hurt someone I care about because of them. I dont know how you know your new guy, but my guess is: not very well. maybe it's a tinder date. maybe it's a friend of a friend. but if I had to make an educated guess, it's someone far removed who is just.. treating you well. like how you want to be treated. kind of a nobody, but that's a good thing. like if things kept being nice, cool. if they didnt work, whatever. something noncommittal. something lowkey. something you didnt have to /worry/ about. which is all... smart. but I also know that if you felt like you wanted to drive that shit into a wall, you wouldnt lose a lot of sleep over it. and you considering the tryst.. well. yeah. speaks to that effect. i... I wonder if I should have even suggested its because I can't drive my thing into a wall. its... I cant. youd understand if you knew.

theres probably only one person in your mind you would legitimately fear me dating if you sat down and thought about it. someone that wasn't just someone you didnt want me dating. not like Kayla or Grace where it would just... bug you. I mean deeper. someone that you couldnt wrest me away from. someone that your charms would fall flat because of. I'm talking Caitlyn levels of dedicated affection. and as I said, I dont want to jump in. I know how easily i fall in love. I'm taking this slow. developing a foundation. trying to figure myself. wanting someone to treat me well and watch anime and cartoons with while being warm and laughing. someone to affectionately take care of me. someone who wanted to spend time with me.. someone who's house i could come over to in the daylight.. someone who's friends were excited for her and not judgemental of her..

I get why you're dating. I'm doing the same thing for the same reasons. i need this. you need this. i wanted you to treat me these ways but i couldnt keep.. telling you how to treat me after so many years. you could write a book on me. I STILL know how to take care of you and I mostly figured it out after years. I wanted to see you try and figure me out. you didnt have to be right. I just wanted you to try. I left a breadcrumb on my IG for this story, but I never know when or if you'll ever read these. I always want to hear your feelings too. I wish you wrote like this. I wish I had a direct line to your thoughts like back in the day when you wrote. it always helped. I still check your tumblr from time to time. like the idiot I am.

ugh. like the absolute idiot I am.

(ps. I watch that last video we made like every day.)

[cornbyte]

It all happened within 24 hours. I got home from work around 7pm, usual for Tuesdays. I had had such a bad day at work, nothing really that bad happened, but I was cooped up in a room all day with just my thoughts and I had been so hard on myself. I just felt like getting home and snuggling with Jasper and crying. But I got home and started getting Jasper ready to go for a walk, and he was SO excited to see me that he was bouncing around and was literally bounding down the hallway, turning around to make sure I was close by and then bounding at me. He was being so goofy that I thought to myself, “Aw man, he makes me feel so much better. None of that matters.” Our walk was so great, we went on his favorite route and he saw three of his friends: The old man that loves him (Jasper is a little suspicious of him but accepts the pats), the angry chihuahua (that he loves pestering) and Mr. Corgi (who he also loves to pester). It was very exciting. All of the plum trees were blossoming and they smelled so good that I kept grabbing some and smelling them and he wanted to see what they were, so I showed him some and he gave it a good sniff then decided he didn’t care because he couldn’t eat it. So I set the flowers on his head, and one stayed on there for awhile. We went back to my apartment where an hour later I started getting sad again, so I laid on his dog bed and was hugging him and being sad while he rolled around on me and nuzzled me. It was making me feel so much better, and then I thought, “what the hell am I going to do when he dies?” And I started crying. 

No more than two hours later, I started getting ready to pick up Andrew from work. He was acting sad, like something was wrong, and I thought it was because he thought I was leaving and not coming back (I’d just recently come back from a 1 day trip to see my mom). I texted Andrew that something was wrong with Jasper, but I just thought that he was sad. I picked up Andrew from work and we went straight back to my apartment to take him out for a walk. He wouldn’t get up even when I picked up his leash, and he gave me that sad look again and I knew something was wrong. I offered him his favorite treat to see if he’d get up and he wouldn’t even take it. I was thinking, maybe he was blocked up? He did just get into the garbage yesterday and didn’t poop much on his walk earlier today? So we eventually lifted him up, and he hobbled over to the stairs and refused to go down them. I carried him down and we took him outside, and he just laid down and looked at me, like he was trying to tell me something was wrong. So Andrew carried him back inside and we laid him on my bed while we called the emergency vet at WSU (it was close to 12am at this point). They told me to bring him in, so we did immediately. It was a long car ride, because he was deteriorating fast (drooling, shaking, looking completely bewildered). We finally got there and they rushed him to the back, and that was when I could really tell how much pain he was in. 

It was a long night of sitting in the waiting room. The vet came out and told us that he had fluid in his abdomen. Then we waited some more. She came back out with three tubes filled with blood, and said it was bad. That’s when I started crying. We waited some more. She came back out to tell me that he had a bleeding mass, most likely on his spleen. She gave me about a million different ways that it could play through, from best case scenario, the bleeding would resolve itself, and worst case scenario being that it’s a cancerous mass and he has 6 months to live. It was so overwhelming. But it was clear that he probably needed surgery to stop the bleeding, but they needed more imaging done so that they knew what they were dealing with and to also keep him overnight. She gave me a quote of $5000-6000 for the surgery, which I needed to pay upfront as a deposit in the morning. The plan was that they’d keep him overnight and do surgery in the morning, after the imaging. We were able to go see him in the ICU before we left, and he was doing a lot better after getting IV fluids. He came out of his cage and we hugged him a lot, and then he went back into his cage on his own and plopped down and was acting generally happy and okay with his sleepover situation. The vet was optimistic that fluids helped so much. But was still bleeding, and the 6 months to live prognosis was repeated.

So then we had to go home without him. We were barely out of the parking lot when he broke down. I put my car in park at a stop sign and we held each other and cried. Neither of us really slept at all that night, I kept waking up thinking I heard my phone ring. Morning came around and I got ahold of my parents, and they said they’d help me with the deposit. The WSU vet tech called me at 7am, saying he made it through the night but needed the deposit because he needed surgery. We got it figured out and they started on imaging on abdomen (to see how big the bleeding mass was and if they could remove it with a splenectomy, and to also see if his liver was affected) and cardiac imaging (to see if it was affected as well before they proceeded with surgery). Then it was just waiting. Andrew and I just sat on my bed and waited. It was around noon I think when the vet called back.

He said that Jasper had masses on his spleen and throughout his liver, and they took a biopsy and had it tested. He was diagnosed with hepatic hemangiosarcoma in his spleen and liver, an aggressive and fast spreading cancer. They gave me the option to do the surgery and remove his spleen and portions of his liver to stop the bleeding, and afterwards chemotherapy. With this they couldn’t even guarantee that the bleeding could be stopped, but if it could he would have only 3 months to live. The other option was to just do chemotherapy, with no guarantee how long he would live, what response he would have, or if the bleeding would stop. The last option was exploratory surgery and then reassess. 

I called my mom and talked to Andrew, and decided that the best option was to bring him home and do an in-home euthanasia. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. I knew that he was already such a sensitive boy, and recovering from surgery would have taken many painful months and that doing that to him would just be cruel and selfish. I could barely wrap my head around it, because how could this be happening? He’s so active and happy. In January, we saw the vet to test one of his new fatty lumps (he had a lot, and they were always fatty tumors but I had every single one checked). He also had a cough and we did chest xrays and blood work, and the vet gave him a clean bill of health because he was completely healthy (except for his weight and that his teeth needed cleaned again). It was literally 4 months ago. It was literally the night before he had been romping around down the hallway and letting me put flowers on his head.

So I called my vet and made the appointment for 5:30 pm. We went and got him at 2pm, but the wait took forever. I just wanted to be with him again because we only had hours left. When we finally got him, he was so lethargic and confused and just collapsed on my lap. The team that worked on him said goodbye to him and gave me the blanket he’d been using and reassured me that I was making the right decision. He had to be carried to my car and I sat in the back with him on the way back and held his head. I couldn’t believe that it was happening

We finally laid him down in his bed and laid down next to him. We cried and gave him a few pepperoni. I held him and stroked his ears and his face. He was shaking and kept snapping his head up, looking around all bewildered. I think he was in pain and didn’t know where it was coming from. He was so in and out of it. But I had a heart to heart with him, close enough so he could hear me and his eyes locked with mine as if he understood what I was saying. Our vet was delayed to 6:30, and at that point I was just crying because I couldn’t stand seeing him in so much pain. I felt like I was prolonging it. He was so painful and was scared except for when he would realize it was me or where he was. It hadn’t even been 24 fucking hours since our walk when he’d been perfectly fine.

And then our vet and a vet tech came over. We’d been saying our goodbyes for a couple hours by then, but we said bye one last time. Seeing and feeling him shake and the heat coming off of him was killing me. I held him in my arms and kissed his head when he fell asleep. He was already so limp to begin with that there was no difference from awake to asleep. And then he was gone. I held him while the tech got his pawprint. Eventually I had to leave his side. Andrew held my face against his chest and wouldn’t let go until they had his body inside the little cardboard coffin that they brought. 

And just like that my best friend for 10 years was gone forever.

The treat I had used to try to get him up was still on my counter. There’s still food in his bowl with his tennis ball right next to it. The three empty dog beds so that he would always have a comfy place to be. His treats, supplements, and poop bags are right next to the door. The hook on my fridge for his leash. My tiny studio apartment was just mine and Jasper’s. That’s what made it so great. It still feels like he’s still at the vet and he’s coming back. He was my best friend and my roommate. My schedule revolved around him. 

It’s been 5 days since he’s died but it still feels like yesterday. My mom came up the day after he died. I took work off and so did Andrew, and today is the first day in my apartment by myself. I don’t know what I would’ve done without Andrew. He’s held me and cried with me and has barely left my side. I know that it put him back to when he lost his mom. He had been alone for that. I don’t know what I would’ve done without him. The day after Jasper died, we had to go down to our vet to pay for the euthanasia and his cremation. He helped me pick out an urn. And when it came time to pay he refused to let me pay, even though it was almost $400. I had the money but he wouldn’t let me and said it was the least he could do. His kindness and love has really held me together.

I know that Jasper loved me so much and that I was his person. He was my soul dog and my best buddy. At 15 years old I know that he lived a good, long life, even though that doesn’t stop this from being so sudden. I’m so thankful that we came into each others lives. He always wanted me to be happy and was quick to investigate and nuzzle me whenever I was crying. He loved Andrew too, and Andrew loved him. I hope Jasper rests easy knowing that Andrew will always keep me safe. I’ll never have another dog like him. I keep expecting to see his face, or hear him walking across the hardwood floor. Every second I spend away from my apartment, I get hit with that guilt of “I need to get home to my dog”, and then I remember. I know that with time it’ll get better, but whenever I think about that I think about wanting to go back into time just to spend more time with him. I miss him so much.

[buckyspetpsychopath]

Forgotten

Words: 2369 Jack Maynard x reader, sibling!joe x reader Youtuber

“she’s starting to wake up” I hear someone whisper. I open my eyes slowly. At first, the faces are blurry but then they focus clearly and I don’t recognize any them.  “Hello dear, my name is Katie. I’m your nurse, you had an accident do you remember?” She smiles warmly. I think for a second starting to shake my head but flashes of bright lights barrelling towards me and my car flipping over pops up and I nod. “good. should we get your family in here?” she smiles. I nod enthusiastically then hold my head in pain. She leaves but reemerges with my brother Joe, my sister Zoe and a man. 

Zoe’s face lights up when she sees me and throws her arms around me, careful of the wires. Joe hugs me next and I instantly feel better with a cuddle from my big brother. When Joe pulls away the man rushes forward trying to hug and kiss me but I jump back holding my arms out, and look at Joe alarmed. 

“y/n?” the man whispers.  “who are you?” I frown and he lets out a sob.  “y/n this is your fiance Ethan, do you remember him?” Joe asks. I shake my head scooting away more.  “where did we go on Saturday y/n?” Zoe butts in.  “Anna and Jonathans why?” I sigh. Joe and Zoe look at each other confused. “she remembers everything else but her fiance?” Zoe mumbles. The man ‘Ethan’ had been staring at me the entire time and it was making me quite uncomfortable, I’ve got to say he’s really attractive but... 

“where’s Jack?” I interrupt. Their heads snap to mine shocked.  “what do you mean, I’m your fiance” Ethan spits. I wince and move away.  “no! Jack is my boyfriend, where is he?” I cry. They don’t really know what to do, so I do the most unrational thing ever and pull my IV out and sprint out the door before they even realize what’s happening. I look both ways and see a waiting room. I spot the buttercreams and my entire face brightens. I zoom in on Jack and start walking quickly to him. I had caught their attention when I had escaped the room, making a lot of noise. They look my way and when they see me their eyes widen. I fling my arms around Jacks neck, leaning on my tip toes. 

“Jack” I sob. “that person, he thinks he’s my fiance, tell him you’re my boyfriend” I cry. He looks shocked and my heart drops, I awkwardly step away from him. “its true isn’t it?” I mutter tears spilling over my eyes and dropping down my cheek. He nods but brings his hand to my cheek wiping my tears. My hand reaches up to cup his and it stills on my cheek, I close my eyes and let out a sob. He gasps and I open my eyes. 

“your arm” he mutters. I look down and see the blood dripping.  “I pulled my IV out, I needed to see you” I mumble. He bites his lip and looks down.  “hey, mind getting your hands off my girlfriend now mate?” I hear behind us. I start feeling dizzy and fall to the floor but I’m caught by Jack, who lifts me bridal style. This angers Ethan more as he reaches for me but I whimper and tuck my head into Jack’s chest.  “mate don’t force her, she doesn’t remember you. Just give her a little space to breathe yeah?” Jack fumes and he looks really hot. Jack carries me back to bed followed by Joe and Zoe and the nurse.  “no more of that” she tuts jokingly putting my IV back in, I grin sheepishly and she smirks. “right I’m going to check your vitals, you’re going to need to get undressed” she says looking at Joe. He stands up panicked and leaves the room. Jack stands to leave too but I reach for his hand. 

“stay” I whimper but I see the look on his face. “if it doesn’t make you uncomfortable” I mumble. He looks at Zoe who shrugs so he smiles at me, sitting back down holding my hand. The nurse peels away the gown I was wearing and I wince in pain. Zoe gasps at my beaten up body. The nurse pulls me forward to see the intense bruising on my back, Jack closes his eyes a few tears spilling out and tightens his grip on my hand. I squeeze back to reassure him I’m fine.  “right, you have three broken ribs, fractured wrist, multiple lacerations and severe bruising. Your memory loss is completely normal and should come back very soon and a concussion that will hurt like hell. These tablets are for the pain, these are for infection and these are for anxiety.” she hands me stacks of pills and I gulp. She leaves and Zoe joins me on my other side helping me to cover myself up.  “Can I leave yet?” I huff looking at Zo. She shrugs and disappears to find another nurse.  “what happened between us?” I whisper looking at Jack now that everybody is gone. He shifts nervously and I look away.  “I was gone a lot, youtube stuff. We tried to make it work but it wasn’t healthy, you were in school and we’re staying up until 3 am some nights to talk to me, we started getting bitter so we decided we should break up. We never really spoke for a while then you show up six months later with a fiance.” he mutters and I snap my eyes to him.  “have you met him?” I ask and he nods.  “what’s he like?” I question and he chuckles.  “he’s your fiance...” he trails off and I look down.  “why don’t I remember him at all?” I whisper. He sighs and stands up.  “I should go” he mumbles.  “got the papers, we can go” Zoe walks in and looks at Jack. She realizes what happened and sends me a sad smile. 

Jack leaves and Zo helps me get dressed. We soon leave after I greet the buttercream boys.  “Zo where are we going? where do I live?” I ask. She sighs.  “you live with Ethan but you’re going to stay at Joe's until your memory comes back.” she replies.  “if” I mumble.  “when” she laughs. I end up falling asleep in the car, I feel someone pick me up and the brisk coldness on my cheek. I open my eyes slightly and see Joe carrying me into his flat. I exhale and nuzzle into him. He sets me in a bed and I fall back asleep. 

-A couple of weeks later-  I still haven’t got my memory back, which is frustrating. I pretty much remember everything but the breakup. I spend a lot of time with the buttercreams as they are all constantly together. So all in all, I spend a lot of time with Jack. I had been on a few dates with Ethan, he was trying to make me remember but I really couldn’t. It’s so frustrating because I can see how much he loves me but I just can’t return the feelings. I’ve tried but I can’t. 

“knock knock” I hear on my door.  “come in” I shout struggling to zip my dress up. I look behind me in the mirror and see Joe waltzing in. I smile at him and silently point to my dress, he gets the hint and comes over to zip it up. He sits on my bed as I slip into my heels. 

“you going out with Zo?” he asks and I nod with a sad smile. “still don’t remember?” I shake my head.  “just going to meet up while she’s in London for the night, look I’ll talk later I need to go” I say kissing him on the cheek and running out the door. I hear him sigh but shrug. 

“y/n” I hear and turn around. 

“hi” I smile hugging Zoe. 

“you look gorgeous” she compliments. 

“thank you” I smile. We sit down at the table and I drop my napkin by accident. I reach down for it and when I come back up I smack my head on the table. 

“ouch” I yelp and I feel a rush of emotions. I remember everything. I look at Zoe wide-eyed. 

“do you remember?” she asks hopefully.  

“I need to go, I need to tell Jack! I’m sorry” I spit and stand up.

“wait, Jack? shouldn’t you tell you’re fiance?” she asks confused, I look at her guiltily and she realises. “go, I’ll pick him up” she rushes swatting her hand at me.

I don’t even wait for a taxi, Joe’s flat isn’t that far from the restaurant, literally about 5 minutes. I’m that excited I shed my heels opting to carry them and start sprinting towards the house. I frantically try to open it with my keys when I get there breathing heavily. I barge in and see the buttercreams sitting on the couch playing FIFA. They turn around at the commotion, stopping the game. 

“I REMEMBER” I yell. Joe jumps over the couch and spins me around in the air. Jack comes up next, hugging me. I hold him close.  “everything?” I hear Jack mumble nervously.  “everything” I whisper. I hear a banging on the door and Joe opens it, Ethan storms in.  “you remember?” he says out of breath and Zoe appears behind me. “yeah,” I breathe out. He jumps forward to hug me but I jump behind Jack, everyone stops. Ethan frowns and Jack reaches behind himself slightly to grab my hip. “if you remember then everything is back to normal right?” he fumes. I look down and go towards the table by the front door. I open the drawer and pull out my ring. Joes eyes widen and he grabs my hand ushering me into the kitchen.

“are you sure about that y/n?” he asks and I nod. “I think it was fate, even if he doesn’t feel the same anymore I’m in love with Jack, I think I always was even before the accident. I can’t marry Ethan when I don’t love him. I’ve spent a lot of time these past few months with both of them, I love Jack, there’s something that you don’t know about Ethan” I stutter. He sighs and hugs me. “I never really liked Ethan” he admits quietly and I giggle. “so you want me with one of your best mates, the biggest flirt you’d ever meet?” I tease. He laughs. “yeah, Ethan seems like an ass but I know Jack would stop all his ways as soon as he had you back, I don’t think he ever really got over you.” he sighs. I perk up at that. “really?” I grin and he nods with a small smile. We head back into the main room and I walk towards Ethan who is glaring at Jack. I hand him the ring and he scoffs.

“you’re going to pick him over me? we were engaged, you remember, you remember what you felt for me right?” he glares. I gulp. “I’m really sorry that this happened but yes, whether he wants me or not I pick him, I will always pick him.I also remember why I was driving in the first place.” I seeth. Ethan looks down.  “I told you I’m sorry” he grits.  “what’s happening?” Jack interjects.  “mate I think you should leave this to me” Ethan grits.  “no, I’ll tell you. I told him that I’m still in love with Jack, he told me he had been cheating on me for months and when I tried to leave he threatened and hit me” I gulp trying not to cry. Jack turns around wide-eyed.  “you love me?” he whispers.  “this is all your fault” Ethan grits and launches forward slapping his fist into Jack, Joe and the boys quickly hold him back. I gasp and grab Jacks face.  “just leave” I yell at Ethan grabbing Jack and taking him upstairs to my bedroom. 

“damn, please let me kick his face” Jack exclaims sitting on my bed holding his cheek. I giggle and go to my bathroom, getting a damp towel. I bring it over to Jacks' cheek, kneeling between his legs and he hisses at the cold.  “you were willing to risk your whole relationship because of me?” he whispers. I blush and nod.  “I love you” I admit quietly. He smiles and grabs my cheek pulling me up slightly and leans down to kiss my lips. The towel is discarded as he grabs both of my cheeks. I grab his forearms for stability and sigh contently.  “I missed you so much” I whisper pulling away.  “I missed you too” he mumbles. We hear a knock on the door and the person enters. 

“hey, sorry to interrupt but I’m going back to the hotel” Zoe says. I nod and jump up to hug me. She also hugs Jack.  “treat my sister right” she says jokingly. He laughs and pulls me into his side.  “I won’t let her go again” he says staring down at me. I smile at Zoe.  “should I tell Joe he won't see you for the next hour?” she smirks and I gasp hitting her arm. I grab my blushing cheeks.  “Zoe” I squeal and she giggles leaving. I turn to Jack and he is trying not to laugh. He pulls me onto the bed and I squeal, bursting into laughter. 

3rd person POV* “hey, ” Zoe says coming downstairs. “I don’t think they’ll be down for quite a while” she giggles and the boys look straight to Joe. He puffs his chest and stands up heading towards the stairs. He stops when he hears a thud, a squeal, and a giggle.  “Joe just leave them” Zoe tuts.  “that’s our baby sister” he defends  “yeah and she’s with her ‘boyfriend’, completely happy and in love. Just leave them” she sighs. Joe smiles a little.  “how happy?” he mutters.  “from 1-10?” she asks. Joe nods. “about 73″ she giggles. Joe smiles wide and joins the boys on the couch after hugging Zoe.