#or upset with me about?
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why is M being so blunt with me… ever since I was pushy with him for the first time like EVER when I was asking him about looking into a solo for my instrument for my senior year AHAHAHA
I literally did the best I have in region… I was working so hard
and you gave the other tuba a ton of attention when they got as far as I did this year, last year
let them play in the other program I usually played in… by themself (and we agreed they deserved it for their work)
let them have a solo… by themself
let them play in program alone AGAIN… by themself
call on them for every question every time and call on me never
ahahaha
hahaha
haaa
…
grow a pair.
#What could he possibly be mad about?#or upset with me about?#I’m literally the sweetest person ever to him#others’ words not mine#and so nice in general#what’s pissing you off?#whatever it is can’t be pissing you off more than you’re pissing me off#just put a little bit of effort in for me.#just once.#I have done so much shit for you#vent#M#teacher crush#teacher crush community#tc community#teacher attachment#tc vent#tc thoughts#tc feelings#tc ramblings#Not everything is perfect here either!#Being honest to my TCers#things are gonna suck#but optimistically thinking that means something good is coming my way
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can't believe we're all adults being forced into the club penguin level of censorship in 2024
#ramble#if you say unalive in front of me i will personally kill you with my hands#you just can't muffle and censor and hold someone's hand through some things#some things are horrible. and they should be spoken aloud and they should upset you. because they are horrible#the second we started kidzbopifying the world was the end of taking anything seriously i think#i'm not even joking i've spoken to people older than me who won't even say the world sex#this isn't the playground you're not going to get in trouble just let us say the word!!!!!!#how am i supposed to listen to you when you won't even say the thing you're supposed to be talking about#yes this is the fault of the platforms with their censorship rules but the fact that we all just go along with it like it's not dystopian#you do know it doesn't stop with cursing right. people are already having to censor queer terms because they get flagged as inappropriate
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I really wonder if trauma theorists who say things like "Humans are the only animal that will be in a fright state when physically safe" or "the rest of the animal kingdom doesn't get PTSD" have ever, like
Do you think they've actually ever met an animal?
#staranise original#psychology#child abuse tw#ptsd tw#animal cruelty tw#so much of what we know about the nervous system and behaviour comes from animal studies!!!#the physiological toll of even fairly brief upsetting events on baby rats is evident for the rest of their lives#my cat has been spoiled like a princess for a decade straight#and if you reach out to pet the top of her head with your hand palm-down she WILL smack you#no matter how happy she is with the rest of the interaction#she LOVES being petted on the head if you approach with your hand behind her ears#seeing that A L W A Y S causes her to react out of sheer reflex#even with me#tell me that's not a trauma response#actually don't#I need to go wrap presents
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most people: haha the time quangle alternate universe where mary ann is a bad kid is so fun!
me: what did she do to get detention on the first day of school. who has the sentient van that’s the most reliable form of transportation. how did fabian survive the nightmare forest. is ragh still homophobic. brennan can you hear me i’m outside your door.
#d20#fantasy high#dimension 20#time quangle#quangle au gorgug is actually so upsetting to me#not even thinking about the junior year implications that he’d be rage crystaled
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emma dupain cheng on the brain😽🎀
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#ml#miraculous#miraculous ladybug#my art#emma dupain cheng#emma agreste#(i think that may the more popular tag for her lol. she is a dupain cheng in my heart though)#plagg#she is thirteen almost fourteen here btw. because i love circularity#emma dupain cheng to me is like. what if emilie or adrien grew up in a stable home with no trauma. that’s emma#and she is theater kid✨#and adrien and marinette are soooo so so supportive and love going to her shows and are so proud of her#/marinette has to be held back from trying to manipulate the school play casting process to secure emma the lead every year#but then emma sets her sights on bigger things(broadway west end)#and adrien pumps the breaks big time#and he’s so torn between supporting her interests and wanting so badly to keep her from like. being a child actor. having a job. b#being pulled from school#and emma gets upset bc he is standing in the way of her dreams#and they fight about it:(#and then emma discovers plagg and convinces him to help her sneak out and go to her callback that she secretly auditioned for#(and forged all the parent signatures for lol)#and. well. plagg CAN be bribed#and also she just reminds him so much of baby adrien🤧 he is a softie#and she runs away to her callback. and adrien and marinette wake up the next morning and see on the news that there is a new chat noir.#anyway. not that i’ve thought about it or anything
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3 years of this godforsaken show
#murder drones has genuinely shaped me so much#drawing stuff from it has been one of my greatest motivators to learn more art stuff#i've been able to iron out my interests and sense of humor due to it#i've corrupted the sekaiju discord with it#much to half the servers dismay#ive grown so attached to these characters. it was heartbreaking to see them go those months ago#who knows where i would have been without this show entering my life#wouldn't have obtained this audience without it. i owe you all that#i messed up the perspective in that one spot im posting this before i can get more upset about it#art#murder drones#murder drones uzi#murder drones v#murder drones n#serial designation v#serial designation n#murder drones j#serial designation j#a little bonus i thought of while sketching out the og poses#Tessa would've loved this.
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I'm rewatching Steven Universe and I will never forgive Fandom for what it did to her
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#also watching it at age 19-20 as it was released and experiencing the resulting clusterfuck online fandom response was a wild trip#im finally rewatching it again at 25 and really really feel lucky to have seen it at the age i did#i have completely different perspective on it now that i have 3 young nephews and a neice where before i was in college#the music is still as incredible as it was back then#and the animation#i cant beleive people got honestly and truly upset and violently aggressive about characters being off model sometimes#early stevens voice though kills me after awhile...... the yelling .... but his characters growth and development also being reflected in#his voice changing as he grows up#they also go crazy hard on some scenes#who am i kidding the show was a masterpiece and ahead of its time
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I think one of the funniest things about the Sabzeruz event is that the devs choose to go with Candace, Traveler, and Paimon having a whole "Ooh, two mysterious men are going into an alley to have a 'private' conversation; they must be bad guys!" only to then go "Oh just kidding, it was only Alhaitham and Kaveh doing typical Alhaitham and Kaveh things."
Except the "Alhaitham and Kaveh" thing in question this time was talking about Mehrak, a sentient robot that Kaveh built using absolutely forbidden technology, and which he then whole-heartedly willed would develop a consciousness of its own, violating one of the central taboos of his nation's governing agency, committing what amounts to an inherent and extreme felony punishable by law.
Alhaitham and Kaveh: Listen, we're not bad guys discussing illegal activity here. We're just two men having a private, personal conversation. Happens all the time.
Paimon, Candace, and Traveler: Oh cool, they're not doing a crime; they're just gay.
But they were, in fact, doing a crime.
#genshin impact#alhaitham#kaveh#haikaveh#kavetham#mehrak#I still can't get over how Kaveh is friends with the chief of police#and living with the former Acting Grand Sage#and Tighnari had to completely hide Karkata's existence with ARSON to get rid of the evidence#but everyone in the entirety of Sumeru just said#ya know#let's let Kaveh have this one#and no one blinks an eye at Mehrak#who is obviously capable of reasoning and rational thought at this point#Light of Kshahrewar is truly the favorite#everyone in Sumeru has one exception#and that exception is Kaveh#let's be real#the reason no one is saying shit about Mehrak#is no one wants to deal with Scribe “I overthrow the government when people displease me” Alhaitham#bro really said “Upset Kaveh at your own peril”#“Only I'M allowed to upset him”#the last people who made Kaveh sad have been sentenced to living in caves and subsisting off mushrooms for the rest of their lives#and this was seen as mercy on Alhaitham and Cyno's part
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Every remake of a game should come with a copy of the game it is remaking that is compatible with modern hardware but otherwise untouched and I'm not even exaggerating this should be mandated by law. If you're going to attempt to recreate a piece of art you have to give people access to its original context otherwise it becomes the only context and makes the previous version simply a superceded product
#eldritch chatter#getting unreasonably upset thinking about the sh2 remake becoming peoples only touchstone for the series#and then having everything the original did and and all its jank (intentional and not) get lost#its the same as losing the original versions of star wars with the practical effects#it keeps people from actually engaging with the culture that the remake came from and understanding it and that makes me want to chew glass
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my sweet old man who is genuinely too kind for the world he lives in :(
#decadentart#bloodborne#retired hunter djura#he makes me so sick hes actually so fucking sweet when i think about it#Yes i gave her a skirt. whenever i draw the people of old yharnam i slways give tbem little accesories :)#the colors are a bit wonky because i intially drew it Reeaaalllyy Dark also idk i picked out some weird ass colors for the pallete#every time you shoot him off that tower an angel looses its wings#legimitately got upset when i killed him for his set#made sure he didnt fall to his death though. thats called bullying when you knock him off btw#also yeah i hc that the beasts are chill w him . and slso he knows all of their names#first maintagged art on this blog. shudders. i hope the fans dont eat me alive im serious you guys scare me#the halo was necessary btw#so anxious…. SEND IT! RAHHH!!! MY AUTISM BLAST GO!
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what if i broke all the bones in your legs actually
#ramble#please let this be a fucking joke#i cannot imagine being this out of touch#YEAH IT'S ALMOST LIKE ART TAKES FUCKING EFFORT AND THE MAJORITY OF PEOPLE DO ENJOY IT ACTUALLY#the phrase 'labour of love' exists for a reason#i sat and watched my grad film on repeat for days when it was done bc i was so proud that my hundreds of hours paid off#I DON'T MAKE ART TO SIT AND LOOK AT IT#I MAKE IT BECAUSE I PUT TIME AND LOVE INTO IT AND I GET TO LOOK AT IT AND BE LIKE I MADE THAT WITH MY HANDS!!! AND MY BRAIN#GOD FORBID YOU PUT A SECOND OF WORK INTO ANYTHING IN YOUR FUCKING LIFE ANYMORE YOU USELESS FUCK????#i'm so sorry i'm unreasonably mad about this#is it crazy for me to say that you should have to do some things in your life?????? god forbid you read your own emails#what are you DOING how fucking LAZY can you be????#and that is NOT a word i ever want to use but this is the DEFINITION of lazy#kids with adhd aren't lazy. tech bros wanting the exact same things that people have worked years for at the push of a button are lazy#i actually need to go and put my face in grass i'm so upset#thankfully. basically every musician who saw this shut it the fuck down and told him he was an idiot so that's nice
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we were sitting on the floor and i was cutting out tiny pictures to make a collage for a friend's birthday. you were on your phone and you laughed about something, and i was still in love with you then, so i asked what had you giggling.
"sorry. i was just..." you took a moment and went back to texting. "i was telling someone about how you're afraid of the dark."
i'm afraid of the dark because something bad happened. "oh." i felt a little slinky of shame crawl down my throat.
you glanced up, and maybe it showed on my face, because you rolled your eyes and held the phone to the side casually so i could see the group chat. "what? was it a secret?"
i looked down to the scissors in my hand. "i just..." no, it's not a secret. it just felt like something private, something serious. saying why would you tell someone that just feels like an accusation. it's unfair. i honestly am not even ashamed of it, it's just a fact about my person that i don't usually share.
what a strange experience. is this a human thing or a generational thing? for our grandparents: did they need to worry about how quickly someone can just... share your personal information? again, i didn't even really have a true objection. what could i say? i want any person in my life to feel they can be honest with their friends. it's not like i said don't tell anyone this.
i cut out another letter to complete the rainbow happy birthday, started hunting for the exclamation mark. i heard you sigh dramatically.
"don't make a big deal about this," you said.
this entire conversation was a pattern for us, and this was when we got to my least favorite part of the pattern. i would get my feelings hurt in some oblique not-technically-terrible way, and then it would be making a big deal about something. you'd get frustrated for me for being soft, but i was born soft. you knew i was soft when you pierced me. it's one of the things that made controlling me so easy.
"i'm not," i felt my voice crack. the question came without my wanting. "why are you guys talking about me?" and why are you saying that thing? why not like - i'm telling them how you're generous and kind and pretty.
you let out this low, tragic groan. "oh my god." you tossed the phone away from your body. "there, see? i just won't talk to them if you don't like it."
the rest of the hour went the way it always went, between us: i said i don't actually mind if you talk to your friends but -, you found a way to call my minor expression of discomfort "being dramatic." you got upset that i had been offended. i ended up apologizing, even though i hadn't actually done anything.
afterwards, you picked up the phone again. after texting for a little bit, you snorted. "okay," you said, "but it is kind of funny you're afraid of the dark. i mean, when you think about it."
#spilled ink#writeblr#i'm trying to write about this really specific and wierd new experience#that i think is specific to the internet generation#where people you trust can just... say whatever??? and while most people are trustworthy#sometimes they'll just like... put ur shit out there????#and the thing is that sometimes it's GOOD - i want you to tell ppl if ur partner is being cruel!!!!!#i want u to be like ''hey is it normal if xyz happens'' ... but stuff like ''she's afraid of the dark''#PARTICULARLY when it's CLEARLY making fun of me....#what is the point of that.#this is huge and complicated and happens outside of romantic relationships too btw#like someone u thought of as a friend will be like . oh did u know she's scared of heights and it's like.#girl why are u fuckin doing that tho?#it's not a SECRET i just ...???????????????????????#and i think that gross feeling of like -- ''i can't REALLY be upset bc there's not a TRUE RULE about this....''#it's just not something talked about. bc it's so specific and yet so complex#bc how could i say like '' this is a violation of trust'' when it... technically I GUESS isn't????????????#idk maybe im just like super sensitive but please tell me in the comments/tags/etc if this is#something u have experienced (a trusted person like spreading ur shit) and if u were cool with it
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Begging on my hands and knees for ambulatory wheelchair users to change the narrative from "not all wheelchair users are paralyzed" to "disability is a spectrum and not everyone uses a wheelchair for the same reasons"
#we need need need to stop throwing full time wheelchair users & paralyzed wheelchair users & severely disabled people under the bus#any time i see someone posting about how ~oh well actually most wheelchair users arent paralyzed~#it makes me feel. upset#and as an ambulatory wheelchair user. please. please can we stop this.
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happy mzen cat day
#project sekai#prosekai#prjsk#prsk#mizuena#mzen#mizuki akiyama#ena shinonome#my art#ITS CAT DAY#not me drawing something for cat but not for THEE NIIGO DAY#still upset about#i was busy with school stuff that i missed a ONE IN A LIFETIME THING#will prob still draw somrthing for it tho
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There’s nothing wrong with wanting unconditional love from your f/o, there’s nothing wrong with being ‘the exception’ there’s nothing wrong with making ur self ship super lovey dovey- there is nothing wrong with making your f/o love you in the way you want to be loved!!!!! It’s your ship do whatever you want
proship/variants + neutrals and RPF DNI
#saw a post that pissed me off lmao#not to ramble but I struggled with low self esteem for. most of my life#part of the reason I’m able to be more confident now and less. anxiously attached is BECAUSE I used my selfship to cope this way#imagining my latest fixation being obsessed with me#worshiping the ground I walked on. being hopelessly in love with me#this how I was able to build myself back up and recognize the kind of love I deserved for myself !!!#I know people don’t really like to be reminded of this but your f/os aren’t real#they can feel however you want them to feel. and if you want them to be so in love with you it’s all they can think about SO BE IT!!!#you deserve to imagine a character who’s never upset with you. who would destroy a city for you. you deserve to be loved unashamedly!!!!!!#make your selfship how ever you want#so sick of ppl in this community complaining about how others selfship UGH#okay I’m done#selfship#self ship#self ship positivity#self shipping#self shipping community#selfshipping#self ship blog#yumeship#safeship#safe shipping#f/o community#fictional other#f/o positivity#♡.txt
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And remember kids,
If you think lgbtqia+ people shouldn't have basic human rights, LUFFY WOULD HATE YOU
If you think women are lesser than men simply for being women, ZORO WOULD HATE YOU
If you think billionaires deserve all the money they made off the backs of working class people, NAMI WOULD HATE YOU
If you think compassion and basic human emotion makes someone worthy of ridicule, USOPP WOULD HATE YOU
If you think women exist to serve men and shouldn't make decisions about their own bodies, SANJI WOULD HATE YOU
If you think it's okay for healthcare to be denied to someone for any reason, CHOPPER WOULD HATE YOU
If you think it's okay to censor research, education, and communication, ROBIN WOULD HATE YOU
#one piece is woke and you can't do anything about it#us politics#the government is upsetting me#one piece#lesbomatic meta#lesbomatics musings
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