#or telling them there were consequences

[ghostdrinkssoup]

will and hannibal both being so chronically alone and friendless their whole lives that it results in them thinking their friendship is totally normal and not homoerotic or deeply romantic at all will never not be funny to me

[backpackingspace]

Okay but do you think the people who were really close to odysseus during the Trojan war had a running bet for when odysseus claimed to have a vision from Athena if it was true or not? Because half the time he was just lying about that.

[akkivee]

still kinda not over ichiro taking a bite out of his hamburger in the leaders bonus hypster track and going 'it's so good!! it tastes really meaty!!' lmao

[turrondeluxe]

Was it love at first sight for Mikey and the tots? Did it take Mikey some time to warm up to them? Super cute AU!!

It was kind of hectic when Mikey saw the tots for the first time ever, while also being emotionally stunted, so the warming up is kind of a slow but surely process!

[thegoldenappleofdiscord]

love how the fandom collectively reimagined drew's character. recently had a cousin of mine pick up the lost hero, and she told me, "reese, i don't get how you like drew. she's so mean to piper." and i kind of sat there for a moment trying to reorganize canon from fanon.

[bananonbinary]

i think its so important when talking about the "masterminds" in homestuck to remember they were all dumbass kids. terezi didnt know what she was doing. rose didn't know what she was doing. dirk DEFINITELY didn't know what he was doing. they were so so so stupid because they all suffered from a terminal case of "is sixteen years old"

[voidcat]

leaning in for a peck on the lips and telling your windbreaker darling they're so sweet they give you toothaches... only to be hit by a real toothache hours later

[acccursed]

Veilguard CANNOT let Rook be the ONLY transgender individual in the Veil Guard. I am manifesting prayer circling etc. the following transgenderisms into existence:

She/he/they genderqueer faggy queen Emmrich.

They/them transfeminine Bellara.

He/they nonbinary Davrin.

She/he bigender Harding.

He/him transmasculine Lucanis.

& this will finally be the game that Varric comes out as a trans man after being stealth for two whole games & a timeskip.

[thaliagrayce]

y'know what we don't talk about enough? Hazel died. We talk about how she grew up in the 30's and 40's and we talk about how out of place she feels in the modern world, but! She died! She was dead! She has spent more time dead than alive, and not by a close margin!

How does that effect a person??? We got some of it in the flashbacks, but once those caught up with her present timeline and she shared them, they just kind of... disappeared. And she was a regular girl with some weird past experiences. That's one way of doing it, sure!

I think it would have been a lot cooler if she was just a touch creepier. If she felt a little bit Wrong. Yeah, in general she's more approachable than her brother, she's more sociable and less closed off, but. If you actually spend any time with her, it can be difficult to tell which child of the underworld is actually more unsettling.

Hazel is bright of personality and has a dazzling smile, but sometimes she'll just... shut down. She'll go completely blank for like half an hour and nobody knows what to do with it. Sometimes she forgets she's alive. Sometimes she'll spout the grimmest shit you've ever heard like it's nothing, she won't even notice it's weird until the room goes quiet. She spent decades in Asphodel, which is designed to make people forget about themselves and wander around for eternity, only she didn't have the luxury of forgetting! Wild! After she comes back to life, sometimes she forgets that she's allowed to Do Stuff now. She can spend so long sitting and staring at nothing. Sometimes she'll start crying on cloudless days because it hits her again that she can actually feel the warmth of the sun on her skin and she can hear birdsong. Every little mundane experience is a blessing and she will make you remember that in the most foreboding way possible.

[pilonciillo]

lol didn’t think someone giving money would give me anxiety

[yourgamemasterthewhiterabbit]

Of my 2% capacity to be attracted to anyone, my type is like 90% women, 5% pretty men and 5% men you would swear are super fucking manly, and never questioned being straight and cis, but are now suddenly *stressed* that they can't figure out why their attraction to me [fully socially interpreted as a woman and labelled that way up until relatively recently] feels incredibly fucking gay

[cathodic-clairvoyant]

There's a lot about discussion of hdwr that baffles me (not all discussion to be clear, because i do think there's a lot of good discussion about hdwr. But equally so are there the ones that make you wonder if you're reading the same story) and I think one that is especially annoying is the constant infantilization of miwa as this passive eternal victim. It drives me up a wall because this is quite literally an issue she's struggled with within the text of the story! She had an arc about how she dislikes how people treat her this way like towards the beginning of the story! And like even ignoring that, this story is about like nuanced and realistic portrayals of being in relationships and learning how to navigate them and so it's like what's the point if you're going to immediately reduce the characters to "the victim" and "the victimizers?" Is that even interesting? Is that a useful lens to look at interpersonal relationships?

[claitea]

thinking about anthea and concordia and how they knew n's time growing up in the castle was awful but they probably couldn't do much about it because they were also under ghetsis's "care"

[johnny-depplyloveyou]

I know there are many bad takes about Gale on this site, but the worst takes I’ve seen on another social media site in another language are much more abhorrent than anything here tbh, the recent one I’ve seen even gets some popularity among his “fans”... They were basically saying it’s Mystra who made him the humble man he is now, without her influence on him he would be as egotistical as in his god ending, and more than a hundred of reblogs are all thanking Mystra for “training her lapdog so well” for them🤢

Did we even play the same game? Isn’t his god ending a direct result of Mystra making him think he will never be enough as he is, and he can only find his self-worth through gaining more power? Didn’t Tara say he’s not himself anymore and she would no longer be his companion in his god ending, she knew him long before Mystra made him her chosen, he was powerful enough before his relationship with Mystra, if he’s anything like god!Gale at the time wouldn’t Tara just leave him? I’d imagine he would have been more confident and had a more stable self-image if Mystra had never contacted him, therefore he didn’t even need the Gale of Waterdeep persona. He would always have been Gale Dekarios in that timeline. And people glorifying Mystra’s grooming and abuse towards him and unironically calling him “her lapdog” is just... I have no words. But what do you expect from an online space that’s infested with terfs and radfems? They just won’t recognize or acknowledge any abuse from women towards men...

[phantomdecibel]

okay so basically all the talk abt my boi euryl inspired me to whip up this quick lil thing now enjoy poli n euryl bullying odys into getting some sleep :)

oh yeah it doesnt have a name. so suffer i guess /j-

“When was the last time he slept, again?” Eurylochus muttered, crossing his arms as he watched Odysseus trip over his feet again. out of the corner of his eye he could see Polites wince, and then relax as their friend managed to right himself and carry on as if nothing had happened.

“I,” Polites hesitated, voice equally soft. “I’m not sure, to be honest. Its… been a while, though, if I had to say.”

Eurylochus snorted.

That much was obvious, and they both knew it. Polites watched Odysseus with an intensity that could rival a god’s, barely blinking as the two of them watched Odysseus stumble again. The man beside him tilted his head, just slightly, to the side, and Eurylochus found himself mirroring his friend. Normally Odysseus would have noticed them by now – following the man around staring was one of Polites’s favourite tactics to get Odysseus’s, or Eurylochus’s, attention and let him know he was about to get in trouble. It was… slightly unnerving, if Eurylochus was being honest, but amusing, too.

Point was; normally Odysseus would have noticed them following him around like this, and either glared them to the point of laughter or shooed them off. The fact that he hadn’t seemed to realize they were there was… concerning.

“If you don’t try talking to him soon,” Eurylochus sighed as Polites started trotting after Odysseus, following at a more leisurely pace, “then I’m taking matters into my own hands.”

“Oh, please don’t,” Polites snickered, glancing back at him. Eurylochus rolled his eyes, and nodded after their friend’s retreating back.

“Better hurry up and try something, then. I wouldn’t be surprised if he tripped over the side of the boat at this rate.”

“Alright, alright,” Polites conceded. Eurylochus picked up his pace so that they were walking side by side, and shared a look with him as Odysseus nearly fell over again. “Okay, okay, I’m going. Cut him off for me?”

Odysseus had never liked being confronted about his own poor self care (none of them did, to be honest), and if he saw Polites approaching him he would probably make a break for it. If he was tired enough though… well, if he were tired enough then Eurylochus should be able to herd the man right into Polites’s trap.

And, well, if that didn’t work…

Eurylochus nodded silently and took off, making his way around Odysseus from a distance. This was an old game by now; one of them would do something dumb, go too long without sleep, for example, and the other two would force their hand in any way they saw fit. It would be telling just how tired Odysseus was if he fell for the oldest trick in the book. There weren’t many good hiding places on the deck of a boat, but Eurylochus wasn’t exactly trying to hide – Odysseus hadn’t noticed him yet anyways.

Which. Concerning.

Eurylochus circled the deck, keeping one eye on his two friends, until Odysseus was sandwiched between himself and Polites. He still hadn’t noticed him, even though Eurylochus was right in front of him.

Looking past his weary friend, Eurylochus caught Polites gaze. The other man nodded, slowly and deliberately, and Eurylochus slowly started deliberately making his way over to Odysseus. Unlike earlier, when he was trying not to be seen, Eurylochus made sure to step a bit heavier than usual, and caught Odysseus’s gaze with a frown.

Odysseus froze when he finally, finally noticed Eurylochus stalking forwards, before wrenching their gazes apart and turning on his heel to hurry away – and running right into Polites.

Gotcha. Odysseus must be exhausted for that to have worked, the trick had been his idea in the first place, and one they used all the time in a number of different situations.

Eurylochus fell back as Polites trapped their friend in a conversation, gesturing with his hands. He didn’t need to know the exact words to know what was being said and what to watch for; while he himself had been in that same position on a number of occasions, Odysseus was the chronic overworker out of the three of them. Him and Polites had long since perfected forcing the stubborn man to get some rest.

Sure enough, Odysseus shook his head, waving a dismissing hand towards Polites. Polites himself didn’t look too surprised, with his hands on his hips and lips pursed with what Eurylochus had long since learned to recognize as concern. He let Odysseus go without too much of a fuss – an unusual sight for most of the crew, who were valiantly pretending they weren’t watching. Polites glanced back over at Eurylochus, though he really didn’t need the signal, already on the move.

His turn.

Odysseus had apparently forgotten he was there, because it was laughably easy to slink up behind him, following in his wake for a couple of steps until his friend relaxed, shoulders slumping as he realized Polites wasn’t following him.

A mistake, really.

Eurylochus lunged, using all the extra speed and strength he’d amassed from years at war to swipe Odysseus’s feet out from underneath him. The man yelped as he fell, flailing a little in surprise, but Eurylochus was quick to catch him and throw him over his shoulder, holding his friend there with one arm.

“Oof–” Unbalanced, there wasn’t much Odysseus could do to protest the rough treatment until he’d gained his bearings, but at that point it was much too late. “Wh– hey! Eurylochus–”

Odysseus struggled, trying to kick him in the side. Eurylochus just weathered through the weak blows, and tightened his grip, hauling the other man off towards his cabin. Polites trailed behind them, snickering and waving the befuddled crew off. Eurylochus turned towards him briefly to shoot his friend a smug smirk, while Odysseus glared between the two of them. Polites rolled his eyes at Eurylochus, but snickered just a little bit louder each time Odysseus’s baleful glare was fixed on him.

“Put me down!” Odysseus hissed, flailing some more. Eurylochus felt him shift, presumably to swipe at Polites. He probably missed though, Eurylochus was holding him too tightly for him to go far, and Polites had been lingering out of reach last time he’d checked. Plus, the man in question only started wheezing with laughter. Odysseus writhed in his grasp, twisting to gently bonk Eurylochus on the head and repeating “Put me down!”

“No can do, Captain,” Eurylochus hummed, amusement dying. As funny as Odysseus’s flailing was, the circumstances were still… concerning. “This is an intervention. You need some sleep.”

“I’m fine,” the man objected in vain. Idly, Eurylochus adjusted his hold on his friend again. Odysseus clearly wasn’t, but he didn’t have much of a choice in the matter anymore.

“You’re not,” Polites gently pushed back. He must have still been a bit too far away, because Odysseus didn’t try to swat at him again. “Eurylochus is right. You didn’t even notice us following you around all day.”

“I did–” but he sounded more petulant than honest. Eurylochus snorted softly.

“We both know you too well for that. It’s bedtime for you.”

Odysseus hissed unintelligibly, kicking weakly again. Polites darted past them, off in the direction of Odysseus’s cabin, leaving Eurylochus to deal with their squirming friend on his own. He grunted as another kick collided with his ribs, but there wasn’t any real force behind it. They both knew that Odysseus wouldn’t be escaping any time soon, even if the man didn’t want to accept it yet.

Still, getting continuously kicked in roughly the same place would bruise eventually, even if it didn’t hurt, and that was something Eurylochus was looking to avoid, thank you very much. Luckily, their destination wasn’t far.

Sure enough, Polites held the door to Odysseus’s cabin open, and grinned as he held up a key at Eurylochus’s enquiring glance. He nodded and darted into the room, studiously ignoring Odysseus’s newly envigored attempts to escape.

This had to be done quickly, in and out before Odysseus had a chance to react, with the door locked before he could reach it to try and stop them. Eurylochus eyed the cot in the corner, piled with a number of extra blankets and pillows Polites must have gathered. Hmm, this should be fine…

It was slightly more difficult with the way Odysseus was flailing, but Eurylochus still managed to drop the man from his shoulder and catch him again without too much fuss. Just a little bit closer, then he could run.

“Do not–” Odysseus hissed, but there was no stopping Eurylochus now.

With one last step, he hoisted Odysseus up into the air and tossed him onto the pile in the corner, turning on his heel and booking it out of the cabin. Polites slammed the door shut in time with a thump coming from back inside, probably Odysseus falling from the bed in a desperate attempt to untangle himself from the blankets, and locked it as Eurylochus held it shut in case Odysseus managed to reach the door before the last step of their plan could be completed.

Seconds after Polites had pulled back with a satisfied grin, something collided against the door with a series of muffled curses. Eurylochus stayed leant against it, but the door held firm. When no further escape attempts followed, he pushed off it to offer Polites, who had fallen to the ground in a fit of laughter, a hand up. Once his friend had composed himself, Polites leant back towards the door, where Odysseus’s footsteps could be heard pacing back and forth.

“Get some rest, my friend!”

Eurylochus nodded, even though their friend couldn’t see him. “We’ll make sure the fleet doesn’t burn down while you’re gone, Captain. You’d better be asleep by the time we get back.”

The two of them waited until Odysseus’s footsteps had stopped, and then a minute more. When it seemed like the man had finally accepted his fate, the two of them crept off.

“That went better than expected!” Polites chirped, clapping his hands together.

“That it did.”

Polites bumped their shoulders together. “I totally thought he was going to bite you, my friend!”

Eurylochus snorted and rolled his eyes, elbowing his friend in retaliation.

“He knew it wouldn’t have helped him,” he side-eyed the grinning Polites, not bothering to fight down his own smirk. “Which is why I’m always the one who grabs him.”

Polites scoffed good naturedly, but didn’t otherwise respond, and they continued to make their way to the bow of the ship.

“What are you all looking at?” Eurylochus called out to the lingering crew. “Full speed ahead!”

Edit: oh yeah forgot to mention – ignore the implication that doors can only be locked from the outside lmao

[artificialcaretaker]

NATHAN EXPLOSION IS FUCKING BRASILIAN?!?!?!?!?!?!