#or telling me what to do with my health and my body and telling me to go to a doctor when she never talks to me

[g-k444]

health ed class where im the shy girl at the back who blushes, embarrassed when the teacher announces we're doing sex ed in class today.

the first thing he asks for is a volunteer

i normally get picked on for these sorts of things - y'know - given im the one at the back of the class that always tucks her head into her book whenever she's noticed... i do my usual interested-in-book act and hope to go unnoticed.

it fails once again.

against my volunteering-want, i pick myself up - cheeks darkening as I feel the class' attention turn to me as my chair scrapes the floor, my heels dragging as i stand at the front and look across the classroom - seeing how many judgemental pairs of eyes stare at me - today's subject.

"Now that we have someone who has kindly volunteered - will you hop up onto the desk-"

I leaned back and let myself pull my bodyweight up so that I sat with my legs extending from the teacher's desk on the front

"-And pull your skirt up."

the words took a second to resonate before my eyebrows flew up in shock. "S-sorry?"

"Show the class your pussy," he said as though it were the most obvious thing in the world. "we're in a health class and you volunteering yourself - your body - so go on, show the class your pussy."

My throat dries and closes, face draining of colour and yet heating up simultaneously, legs crossing over each other defensively whilst my body seemingly freezes at the overwhelmingness of it all.

I can't talk - my throat hoarse from the shock of it all - and instead the best i can do is shake my head erratically, not willing to oblige. was he joking? was this some example of how if you don't wanna show your body to everyone you shouldn't send pictures?

what sick thing what going on?!

it wasn't a joke though - and seemingly bad was turning to worse at the teacher frowned. "well, you've already volunteered yourself, and if you don't comply with what i tell you to do then there will be consequences, miss."

my body remained frozen in place from the shock of it all. and looking across the classroom, all the other students seemed perfectly okay with what was going on - as if there were some universe where this was normal! And if not neutral to it - some of the body even seemed to have their interests piqued by the idea, leant forwards in their desks as though trying to get closer to the action.

the teacher noticed my lack of movement and took matters into his own hands.

"Jones! Up!"

I looked across the room as my bully - the one that antagonized me for all things stupid and trivial - stood up and came to the front of the class.

"I'm going to lift her skirt up and hold her body to keep her still - i want you to hold her thighs open and pull her panties off."

this time the words clicked faster, and I pushed myself off of my arms to get off of the table and not let myself get undressed in front of the whole class - yet my teacher was faster. his arm wrapped around my body and pulled my back into his chest, his other forearm grasping at the hem of my skirt before yanking it upwards and revealing the upper skin of my thighs and the baby pink panties i'd chosen this morning - things that I hadn't expected nor wanted the class to see

"get-off- mE!" i wriggled under the teacher's hold and yet couldn't escape his grasp - and looking across the class with teary eyes, noone cared to make eye contact with me or help - instead they all made eye contact with the baby pink between my legs, uncaring for the yelps that left my mouth

the only one that looked me in the eyes was Jones. My bully, who hadn't shown kindness since I'd first joined. please, Jones... I'd whispered with a wavering tone to him - holding eye contact as he leaned down, his hands falling on either of my thighs... before he gripped them - hard - and prised them open to give everyone a better view of the pair of panties. and with both his hands occupied, his head fell between my legs as a scream left my mouth, his teeth clenching around the material to pull it away from my pussy and expose the raw flesh that evoked some scattered gasps and wows across the classroom.

"Terry, take my place holding her - everyone gather round-"

My body was grasped by a different set of arms, blubbers falling from my lips as the teacher came to my side and the class left their seats to come closer to my bare pussy - eyes fixated on the exposed mound

"This is what a real pussy looks like - this up here-"

he touched my clit and made my whole body jerk, a cry mixing ang mingling with a moan and making something of a wailing noise that seemed to make someone's trousers tighter

"that is the clitoris. the place that had the most nerves and it a pleasure point on the female anatomy. This set of lips is the labia majora - the other lips - and these inner ones are the labia minora"

i felt utterly degraded feeling him pinch either set of lips, shaking them with his words to emphasise what he said using my body - a trail of dampness following his fingers as he pulled away from my pussy

"and most importantly - this here is the vagina - the hole from which women have periods and babies from - but most importantly - the place which you put cocks, fingers and toys into to pleasure a woman."

"everyone, you may now touch and feel the demonstration."

my whole body jerked as various prods and motions were conceded on my pussy - Jones' hold firm around my thighs and stopping my from squirming or wriggling myself away from all the touch that made tears leak from my eyes

"can i finger her, sir?"

"absolutely, how else would you learn?"

a scream leaves my mouth as a pair of foreign fingers breaches my pussy, twisting and almost patting my inner walls curiously, before pulling away with a trail connecting his fingers to my pussy - fluid dripping between his fingers as the separated the two that had been inside my pussy

"okay, so, our first assignment will be to see how a pussy reacts when stimulated with pleasure"

everyone is given a chance to make me cum.

initially i scream and writhe on the desk whilst I'm instead pinned down, and have my pussy violated with fingers what scissor my walls and prod a sensitive spot until my juices spread over my shaky legs. then it's a tongue that breaches my hole with flicks and thrusts. they gain confidence though - and it's not long before a cock is inserted into my pussy and leaves stains of white over my pussy when he finishes.

my throat becomes so raw i cant speak - my mind a broken scramble and my pussy is so spent and broken that it doesn't even contract in horror anymore. it's completely passive as the orifice is breached over and over until...

"okay, that's good - now, as we still have a bit more time before class finishes... let's have some fun - everyone - find something in your bag or in the classroom to shove in her pussy to see how she reacts."

my mind is still scrambled - yet someone props a book beneath my head so that i can at least see all of the objects that are pushed into my hole - the pupils' cum acting as lubrication that allows the random objects to enter my pussy

a whiteboard pen, markers and other various stationary items enter first - testing the waters before someone tries to push a water bottle up there - then a chair leg that two people need to hold to effectively spear me with the metal rod

"good job today," the teacher bends to say into my ear as the students thank him and leave the classroom whilst im still starfished, energy dead on the desk. "clean yourself up and go the principal's office once you've done that. apparently he could hear all the racket in here and wanted a private meeting with you"

[mushhroooms]

Day 1. Oviposition w/ Neuvillette

A/N: This is probably the most unhinged thing out of everything I’ve ever written. Also probably OOC since the last time I was into Genshin was the multiple Albedo incident and Scara being revealed as Wanderer so I’m going off fics and what little I know of his character😭

I hope this is good :(

A/N #2: I’m so sorry this took forever to release. I've had a lot of stuff going on with my mental health and school. I’m trying to do it as fast as possible without rushing the fics!

Word count: 4.6k

Reader: The reader is gender neutral but has afab anatomy but other than that the reader’s body is not described!

This fic includes consent checks because consent is sexy❣️

Warnings: blood, branding, belly bulging, biting & marking, Breeding, collar & leash, dacryphilia, blood mentions, master/pet, slapping (not the face though), soft sadist Neuvillette, possessive Neuvillette, soft dom Neuvillette, dom Neuvillette. Neuvillette goes feral, monster fucking (He’s a dragon so…), double penetration, overstim, oviposition, rut/heat cycles. 

If I missed anything please let me know!

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“Please-” you go to plead with your husband, who seems to be in a very bad mood today.

“Did I say you could speak?” he snaps, voice filled with a venom that you’ve never heard from him before.

“What’s gotten into you!? I can’t even just speak to Wriothesley now!?” You shout, your own irritation growing.

Your husband was never like this, never possessive, never jealous... This was all new and out of character for him and it worried you.

“I don’t like it! The way you were so close to each other!” He turns, and for a second you swear his pupils are more slitted than ever. “His scent on you” Disgust is in his tone.

Your shoulders droop, anger fading more into worry “What is going on, Neuvillette? You’ve never acted like this before.” Your eyes search his as he stares at you sitting on the edge of the bed from across the room. There’s something different, something primal in his eyes.

He calms down a bit, but you can tell he’s still angry by the look on his face, a frown, eyes seemingly glaring, his eyebrows furrowed. “I just don’t like what I sensed between you two.”

You get up and walk over to him, the gaze in his eyes makes you feel like… prey, nearly feral.

You look into his eyes as you stand before him “Neuvillette. You know there is nothing between me and Wriothesley, he’s just someone for me to talk to when you're busy. I love you.”

He calms fully, his shoulders fall as he calms down a bit, your hands cup his cheeks and your thumbs stroking his skin. “I… I know, I…”

“Hm?” You hum as he stops talking, not finishing his sentence.

“I can’t say I don’t know what came over me because that would be a lie.” He frowns

“Then tell me the truth, it’s ok.”

“It’s just… I want you all to myself. Forever.”

“And you have me.” Your voice is hushed.

“But, I-I want you more deeply, I want to know if anybody sees you they’ll know you belong to me. I want to mark you and… Archons, I just want to claim you in every possible way.” His voice comes as a bit of a growl and his hands grip your arms, pulling you closer and holding you in place.

His words and tone send shivers straight down your spine and to your core, you can feel it, the bulge in his pants against your thigh.

“Neuv-”

“I want you, I want you so badly” His breath is heavy and his hands grip your arms tighter. “I want to mark you up, I want to make you mine over and over again, I want to own you,” he growls and you feel the knee-weakening spark of arousal in your lower region at his words.

“Neuvillette-”

“My rut, it’s come, I can’t control myself- I-” He pulls you closer, against his body as he wraps his arms around you.

“Then take me.”

“W-What?”

“If you want me, then take me.” You whisper, wrapping your arms around his neck.

“Beloved.” His voice shakes “You can’t say things like that during my-”

“I know” His hands grope your hips “But I mean it. You’re my husband. I want to help you.” “You… you can’t. I could hurt you.”

You’ve had sex together before, yes, so you’re aware of his… physique… but he has a point, you and Neuvillette have never spent a rut together, it’s the first one he’s had since you two have been married, and you have no clue on what to expect.

“I trust you” The words leave your mouth before you begin to think about what he may even do to you because it’s true, you trust him with your life.

His eyes widen a bit, the feral look in his eyes growing, and he growls “Love. I- You can’t possibly begin to imagine the things I want to do to you.”

“Then show me.”

He lets out a heavy breath before slamming his lips onto yours, your words spurring on his maddening lust. The kiss is rough and messy, and his hands roam and grope your body, like a wild man. “My love” He groans “I’m going to ruin you.”

He pushes you onto the bed and pulls away from the kiss, he looks down at you, pupils slit in lust, his breath hot and heavy as it fans your face “Do you mean it? You’ll let me do what I want?”

“Yes,” You whisper out breathlessly “I really trust you.”

The air falls silent as he pants, his hands gripping the sheets next to your head before he whispers out a small ‘fuck.’

“Strip” He demands.

He gets off you, peeling off his coat and shirt, before walking over to the fireplace, you sit up and begin to peel off your clothes, trying to figure out what he is doing. He’s holding a metal rod into the fire and your curiosity peaks “What are you doing?”

“I am going to brand you.” Your eyes widen at his blunt response, but your thighs instinctively press together as your cunt throbs, and he sees it in his peripheral vision, he smirks, feeling himself get even harder inside his pants.

“Everybody will know exactly who you belong to just by looking at you.” He begins to walk over, metal rod in hand, the shape on the end glowing with the sizzling metal.

“Turn around.” He orders and who are you to disobey your husband? You turn around on the bed, sitting on your knees, looking down at your hands clasped tightly together in your lap, waiting for the burn, for the pain. He places a hand on your shoulder, giving a comforting squeeze. “This won’t hurt too much, my love”

He leans in, placing soft kisses on the back of your neck before pressing the burning metal to the flesh of your back. You cry as you feel your skin begin to sizzle, he shushes you “I know beloved, just a bit more.” His voice is softer as he comforts you. You tremble, your skin burning as the metal shape steals the spot of your flesh. He kisses and nips the back of your neck and shoulders as he holds the brand to your flesh. You feel your flesh give way, molding to the shape, and you can only guess from feeling that it’s a dragon. But who knows? Your mind is blinded by the burning pain.

He pulls away the metal rod and from you. The comforting weight of his body, breath, and warmth disappear, leaving you to sob as your flesh stings in searing hot pain. You can distantly hear the metal being placed and some drawers open before his weight returns to you, his thighs encasing yours as he holds you from behind.

“Shhh… I know, Darling. You did so well for me.” He whispers, you can feel his erection pressing against your rear as he leans close to you, his arms drooping around your shoulders, kissing up and down the side of your neck. “So good.” He purrs before sinking his teeth into the nape of your neck, and you cry out sharply as his sharp teeth break through your skin, hands flying to claw at his forearm meekly. He growls at the sweet nectar of your blood on his tongue, his forked tongue lapping up every droplet of blood, his hands squeezing your hips as he grinds against your ass. “Do you know how pretty you are when you cry? When those big tears roll down your cheeks from those pretty eyes?”

He hums as his hands caress your hips before he presses his gloved fingers against your still-aching brand mark, smirking as you cry out, your voice cracking and breaking in pain. “So fucking pretty” He growls, his hand gripping your hips roughly as he presses his fingers against the mark, enjoying every single little whimper, whine, and cry of pain you let out. He pulls away, looking at the violent red brand mark and the sweet bubbles of blood on the wound from his teeth.

He grabs the cloth and alcohol that he had grabbed from the drawers, pouring some alcohol onto the cloth before pressing it to the brand mark, to keep it clean for now, you let out a tiny sob at the sting of the alcohol. “It’s ok, beloved.” he gives you a gentle kiss on the side of your neck, before he removes the cloth, flipping it over and putting alcohol on that side, before pressing it to the mark on the nape of your neck, and you whimper and flinch. He kisses your hair as he pulls the cloth away, hands going back to your hips, while he grinds against your ass again, making you whimper.

“You’ve done so good for me so far, but I am far from done with you.” He groans “On my lap.” He orders and you turn, slowly crawling onto his lap. Your hands are holding onto his shoulders as you look into his eyes. You sniffle and he smirks, his hands cupping your cheeks and using his thumbs to wipe your tears. He leans in to kiss your cheeks “So pretty” He whispers.

“How about you close your eyes for me, Sweetheart?” His thumb strokes your cheek, and your eyes flutter shut, “Good, so good for me.” His hands pull away from your face and a few seconds later you feel something start to enclose around your neck, velvety and thick, a soft ‘clip’ hits your ears as what you presume is a collar finally closes around your neck, snugly but not tight enough to cut off your lack of air. A small tug jerks your upper body forward.

“Open your eyes.” He says his previous ferality in his tone returning. Your eyes peek open softly, seeing the dark blue velvety leash wrapped around his hand. “How does that feel, pet? Good?” He tugs again, a little rougher this time, making sure the collar won’t hurt you. You can feel his hard-on straining in his pants against your bare cunt.

He smirks and tugs again “Grind down onto me, pet.” He orders, and who are you to disobey him?

Your hips press down, and the rough fabric of his pants against your clit makes you whimper, “Neuvill-” Your moan is interrupted as you cry out when his hand harshly slaps your thigh, leaving a red mark in its wake.

“No, no,” He tugs the leash hasher, making you fold, your hands resting on the bed beside his hips as you grind your aching cunt down onto his clothed erection. “What’s my name, pet?” He emphasizes your title in his question, making sure you know your place.

“Master” You whine, your hips speeding up as your stomach begins to burn with the build of your orgasm, fuck, were you really that close already?

“Good, very good” He coos, his voice thick with lust and pleasure as you grind against the bulge in his pants, leaning in, he buries his face into the crook of your neck, biting into your shoulder, ears soaking in every sound of your pleasure. “You gonna cum?” He hums into your skin as he takes in your scent. Your whimpers and moans seem never-ending as you grind against him, the neediness in your movements is a big give away and you would be ashamed in any other situation if his hand weren’t on your hip helping you.

“Cum on me” He whispers, taking another bite, softer this time, into the side of your neck, You feel your cunt clench, and your clit throb, so close, so so close.

“Master- Master, please-” You cry out as you cum, hips stuttering before you collapse onto him, gripping his coat, as your cunt trembles around nothing and your body shakes.

“There you go, such a good pet for Master huh?” He whispers relishing as you jolt with the aftershocks of pleasure. “Now everybody will know you belong to me…” The words are more to himself as his fingers ghost the bite marks he’s left on you. “Lean back.” The order is simple but shocks you to the core, you know what comes next.

Nonetheless, you lean back. Your hands grip his thighs to hold yourself. He peels off his gloves, never breaking eye contact as he tosses them in the direction of the foot of the bed, where both of your clothes lie, his hand gripping the leash trails down to let his fingers rub slow, precise circles on your clit, his hold tugging the leash, forcing your head down to watch as his fingers rub your hard, sensitive clit.

“Cum again, on my fingers this time.”

You pant and whimper out “But, I just came-”

“It was not a request.” He snaps, cutting you off, pinching your clit, making you jolt. “You will cum on my fingers.”

His fingers speed up and your body shakes in overstimulation, you whine as your eyes clench shut and you feel the pressure grow. “Like that pet, cum, you can do it. Cum.” He demands, his voice hushed to a whisper as his eyes bore at your closed ones. “It’s too much!” You feel every muscle in your body tense, your back arch, your breath grows shaky, and every pant comes with a tremble in your throat. Your eyes squint open, tears gathering at your lash line as you watch the muscles in his hand contract with every movement of his hand.

“Cum.” his hand gives your hip an encouraging grope as he feels your cunt clench.

You sob, your hips stutter and buck, before your back arches, pressing your body against his as your body spasms. “Shhh… Shhh, you’re ok, pet” He whispers, still rubbing circles on your clit as you orgasm, eyes rolling back into your head.

His continued ministrations make you squeal “M-Master, please!” you sob out, shaking and trembling. He pulls you into his chest, making your head rest on his shoulder as he adjusts his angle, slipping two of his fingers into you as his other hand takes place on your clit, rubbing your clit in tight circles while nimble fingers start to spread out your cunt, scissoring, and curling inside of you.

You feel like you’re about to explode, the corners of your vision start to blacken, you let out a choked noise, and he kisses the top of your head “C’mon, you can do it.” His tone is encouraging, despite him knowing full well the overwhelm he’s putting you through right now. “Please-” you go to plead, it feels good, but it's also too much “Do it, pet.” He orders, you practically feel your body tick with each jolt of pleasure, each thrust of his fingers hitting your G-spot, each rub on your clit. “I’ve got you, pet. Now, cum.”

Your hips buck wildly and you cry as your cunt spasms “Master! Master!” (New stuff from here down)

Your juices soak his hand and forearm as you squirt, eyes squeezing shut, body shaking, and tears streaming down your face. “There you go, pet, so good for me.” He praises, his fingers still inside you and his rubs on your clit slowly, working you through your orgasm. He places a kiss on your throat “You’re so good for me, so pretty when you cry and make a mess.’

He pulls his fingers away, letting you tremble as you come down from your high, kissing your forehead “I love you pet, so much.”

“I love you, too…” You say breathlessly, he grabs you by the hips, moving you so you lay down on the bed, under him “Are you ready, my love? This next part will get… intense." he whispers as he undoes his belt.

You nod softly, you’re overstimulated already but don’t want to disappoint and he can tell, he stops for a moment, his belt undone, and he cups your face, thumbs stroking your cheeks as his slit-pupil eyes look down at you. “My beloved, are you sure? If you are unsure about this I can stop.”

“No, I’m sure. I’m just overstimulated… I promise, I want this.” You respond softly, reassuring him, and he gives a soft smile, he moves his hands from your hips to your hands, intertwining your fingers together. “I’ll start gently, okay?” He whispers, kissing your cheek softly as he reassures you.

He untangles his fingers from yours, hands going back to his pants, undoing the button and zipper, and pulling his pants off, tossing them with the rest of both your clothes, leaving him only in his briefs, the large bulge in them nothing except intimidating. He can see the look in your eyes, the slight hesitation, he knew it was a struggle for you to take it every time you’ve both had sex.

“I’ll start gently… I know you’re overstimulated and it’s quite a stretch, but I will ensure it’s comfortable for you, okay?” He reassures you, thumbing at your thighs to comfort you. You nod and swallow when his hand pulls away from your thigh, trailing to his briefs to pull them down, you feel your breath catch in your throat, and your cunt throb, he gives you one last look, making sure you’re ok. He knows he won’t be able to stop once he’s started, when he’s buried in your warmth. 

He pulls down his briefs, and the tips of his cocks slap against his abdomen, there’s pearls of pre-cum resting on the slits, the tips are flushed deeply, and they twitch when the cold air of the room hits the leaky tips. You swallow and his hands go back to hold your thighs, he pulls you closer, pulling your head from the pillows so you lay flat against the bed, he lifts your legs, putting them over his shoulders. He smooths his hands down your legs, from your ankles to the back of your thighs, pressing them to your chest as he leans over you, trapping you there with his cocks resting on your lower tummy, his fingers ghosting from the back of your thighs, over your shoulders, before cupping your cheeks. He looks into your eyes, his thumbs stroking your cheeks.

He’s checking you, again, trying to find that hint of hesitation, of fear. He feels his heart skip a beat when he sees none of those. He sees the trust, the love in your eyes. He kisses the tip of your nose, before he takes his hands off your cheeks, embedding them in the bed next to your head.

He pulls his hips back, his tips rubbing against your clit as he positions himself, you whimper at the sensation, your hips subconsciously squirm to try and get more friction, he groans as he feels you rub against his cocks and finds himself grinding his hips into yours. His cocks rubbing through your slick cunt and bumping on your clit. He snarls and ruts his hips faster “You smell so good, so sweet- fuck- you feel so good-” His hands tangled in the sheets, grip tighter and you yelp when you feel the cold feel of his tail wrap around your waist. He growls as his tips catch on your entrance before slipping and bumping harshly on your clit, making you gasp. He huffs as he positions himself again, putting his force into pushing into you. His breath hitches as he feels your cunt give way to him, his flushed tips pressing into your warmth. He groans loudly as you whimper, his cocks sinking deeper into your sweet cunt.

He pants as he bottoms out inside you, claws gripping the sheets and threatening to rip them. “You feel so good my love…” he groans out again, his fang digging into his bottom lip, drawing blood. You pant as well, underneath him, your eyes threatening to roll back into your head just from him bottoming out. He chuckles, one of his hands releasing the sheets from his death grip and trailing down your body, pressing down on the bulge on your tummy. You moan shakily, the pressure making your walls tighten around him, ensuring you can feel every inch… every vein… every throb. 

“Are you sure about this… my love? Once I start, I will not stop till I am satisfied.” He says breathlessly, his purple eyes piercing your very soul. “I’m sure, I want this.” You reassure him, you wanted to tell him that if you really didn’t want this, you’re cunt wouldn’t be as soaked as it is but the words left your brain with his first shallow thrust, flushed tips poking at your cervix. You gasp, and he lets out a quiet groan. His pace is slow, and shallow, trying to make sure you're ok first before he lets himself go. You grow slightly frustrated with the ever so slow pace, reaching up and cupping his face “Please, Neuvillette, I’m ready.” You whisper, and his eyes meet yours once again before he growls quietly. “I’d grab onto the sheets then.” He whispers, and before you can question what exactly he means by that, his hips are pulled back, snapping forward just as fast, stretching your walls and pounding you mercilessly into the mattress with each thrust, the bedframe creaking with a protest at the rough and fast movements, the tips of his cocks for sure to be bruising your cervix, your sure tomorrow you won’t be able to walk, but right now that’s the last thing on your mind. His claws had already ripped through the sheets next to your head, your own hands digging into the sheets.

“You feel so fucking good- so fucking good for me.” He growls out, his eyes falling shut, and his eyebrows furrowing, baring his fangs as he bites your shoulder. You feel tears well once more in your eyes, clouding your vision. A bittersweet mixture of pleasure and pain. “Neuv-Neuvillette.” You barely manage to moan out in pain between your moans and cries. Your ankles dangling uselessly over his shoulders. You’re already close again. Your eyes squeeze shut and a sob tears through your throat as you cum, his hips never once faltering as he fucks you through your orgasm. He’s focused, so incredibly focused on the way your weeping cunt sucks him in despite the rest of your body’s protests, on the way his tips are pounding against your cervix with every thrust, where he’ll plant his seed, where you will bear him children.

His pace is unrelenting, his tail wrapped around your waist tightening its hold just a bit, he pulls his fangs from your neck, forked tongue lapping up the blood. He wraps his arms around you, forcing your back to arch as he hugs you, cocks feeling like they’re pounding into your sensitive cunt even deeper. You sob, your arms wrapping around his neck, nails clawing at his back, your bleary eyes seeing your ankles dangling over his shoulders and your ears ringing with the sound of skin slapping and the wet squelching of your poor pussy. “Neuvillette! Neuvillette!” You cry out.

“So good for me, so good.” He growls, his arms tightening around you. He’s starting to get close, he can feel his cocks throb inside your warm cunt. “I’m gonna cum, I want to cum inside you, please. I want to give you my eggs.” He practically whines, despite the fact he was growling just seconds ago. The thought of planting his eggs deep inside your womb, having your belly grow round and your body plump as they grow inside you, drives him crazy. Your thighs shake as you feel your upcoming orgasm. The thought of him laying his eggs in you is both exciting and terrifying. Will they fit? When they grow will you even be able to birth them?

Logic and worry go out the window as he angles his hips, the tips of his cocks pounding against your g-spot with every snap of his hips, you feel the pressure growing, and he takes one of your nipples into his mouth, his forked tongue caressing the bud as he suckles. His claws dig into your skin threatening to break your skin from his death grip, his arms wrapped around you not even allowing you to squirm away by as much as an inch.

“Neuvillette! Cumming! M’ cumming!” He pulls away from your nipple, leaving the bud sore, his hips moving faster “Cum. Cum for me.” He demands. You feel your orgasm crash into you like a freight train; your legs tremble as you squirt again. Your eyes roll back into your head as you soak his pelvis, your back arching even more in his hold, a wave of white crashing into you. He lets out a primal growl, his hips moving faster, pounding into you. His growls and groans and grunts grow, and his claws break your skin, droplets of blood spilling from the claw marks now adorning your sides. He grunts loudly, hips slamming in one last time before he stills, his cum pouring into you, deep into your womb. He pants, his cock pulsing and twitching with every spurt of cum into your depths, your walls milking him as your body trembles.

His hold doesn’t falter “Do you want it, love? Do you want my eggs?” He whispers down to you, your mind is foggy from overstimulation and the afterglow of your orgasms. He finally releases you, letting your body slump to lay down on your back again on the bed, caressing your cheeks as he helps you come back down to earth. “Yes.” you whisper out as your senses slowly return to you.

“Are you sure?” He asks ever so softly, making sure you are 100%. You nod, shaky hands reaching up to pull him gently down into a kiss. He kisses you with fervor, tender and soft. His hands cup your cheeks as you feel something moving up through one of his cocks, you gasp. He pushes himself deeper, his tips poking at your spongy cervix. He groans lowly, the sound soft as the weight leaves him, the egg planting itself in your womb. The egg is rather large and the weight is nearly crushing, it makes you whimper as you feel the foreign object and weight. He practically purrs into the kiss, another bump moving up the length of his cocks, before planting itself in your womb alongside its sibling.

“So good. Do-ing so good for me, love.” He grunts out breaking the kiss as another begins to travel, a thin string of saliva connecting your mouths still, “Last one, so good-” He mumbles, Groaning as the the final egg leaves him, snuggling in your crowded womb next to the others.

“So good for me, my love, so full of my clutch.” He rubs your stomach, which now has a tiny but noticeable bump to it. “Are you ok? How do you feel?”

“Heavy.” Is all you can manage to mumble out “No pain?” He asks softly. You shake your head. “Good. Good.” He kisses your forehead, still rubbing your tummy. You feel your eyes droop, the exhaustion from the overstimulation and intense sex taking its toll.

He kisses your forehead again “Sleep love, I’ll clean you up.” You hum in response, too tired to form words, your eyes shut and you sigh, sleeping overtaking your overworked mind, you can distantly feel the warm damp cloth cleaning bite marks and the mess between your legs, his voice is softly heard, not talking to you, no, to your tummy, a warm smile overtakes your face and the last thing you feel being his hand caressing your tummy and kissing it before the arms of sleep wrap around you and you sink into the mattress.

[rosenclaws]

Lacy || Joel Miller x Reader

Like ribbons in your hair My stomach's all in knots You got the one thing that I want

warnings: jealousy, angst, drinking, light injury, happy ending

a/n: SO. I used to write Joel fics on here but deleted my account bc my mental health was suffering but it's been like a year and I'm in a better place and I really liked some of these so I'm going to post them again. Also my pedro obession had dwindled but with tlou s2 and f4 it might come back sooo. My old handle was toxic-seduction (its cringe I know I'm sorry). So if you feel like you've read it before you might have lmao.

Perfect Perfect Perfect. She’s just so. Fucking perfect. Your body moves on auto pilot as your brain spirals into the depths of hatred and loathing. All because of Joel’s new girlfriend.

Your mind is torn between raging jealousy and embarrassment. You and Joel were nothing. Just friends. You worked odd jobs in Jackson and would cross paths with Joel often. He wasn’t very friendly at first but soon enough you managed to break down his initial suspicion. You became closer than most. At least you thought you were. You’d only seen him joke and smile around Ellie so when he laughed at one of your jokes you felt your stomach flip.

He brought you little trinkets he found on patrols too. Small things, things that most people wouldn’t care about but Joel brought them to you so of course you cherished them like they were gold. Then she came to town. It was embarrassing how much you let your mind turn to jealousy and resentment.

Lacy was beautiful, strong, and the nicest fucking person in town. She’s sweet and helpful and so smart. She’s everything you feel like you’re not. So why wouldn’t Joel be attracted to her? They’re patrol partners too. You see them every morning and come back every afternoon.

You don’t go on patrol. Not anymore. Joel knew that, he never asked and you never told him. He doesn’t care though. You pull your weight just as much as everyone and Joel respects that. Some people don’t. So to have Joel tell you he doesn’t care what you do, it always makes you happy.

Still you wonder if he’d like you if you did go on patrol. If you could spend hours with him outside the walls, just the two of you. Maybe he’d compliment your shots or offer his jacket to keep you warm. Like he does for her. You saw them once coming back inside the gates. His jacket was draped across her shoulders and your heart cracked. You bet it was romantic too. He noticed she was cold and so he happily gave her his jacket. How cute.

You walked away from them and buried yourself into kitchen work. Helping stock and prep for dinner. Your brain is still thinking of her. The worst part is she isn’t someone you can even hate. She’s only ever been kind to you. Always offering her help to anyone who needs it. Her smile is so perfect and she makes everyone happy.

Especially Joel. Joel always seems to be talking with her which is a big deal for the man who only communicated in noises the first time you met. For fucks sakes she even bakes cookies in her spare time. You try to avoid seeing them but somehow it’s like they always pop up where you are. Tonight they’re patrons at the bar where you’re serving as bartender for the night.

“Hi there darlin’” Joel’s voice makes your heartbeat a little faster but you see Lacy standing right beside him.

“Whiskey on the rocks, right?” You blurt out without thinking. He looks surprised at first but nods.

“One for me too please.” Lacy asks nicely. You give her a tight smile and nod silently. It doesn’t take long to pour their drinks and Joel takes them both, gesturing to her to go sit.

“Thank you,” He says with a small smile.

“Anytime.” Though other people come and go, you can’t help but keep your eyes on them.

Every time they laughed or smiled or got closer, it made your blood boil. You were jealous, you hated this feeling. You hated feeling the anger that burned inside of you. You hated how much you hated her. It made you sick but you couldn’t get yourself to look away. It’s like you secretly wanted to watch your whole world burn. You watch as she says something and Joel leans in closer, his lips barely ghosting her ear as he rests his arm on the booth behind her. The chatter of the bar stops as the sound of a glass shattering.

It’s only when everyone’s eyes land on you do you realize you made the noise. The wine glass in your hand is now in pieces on the counter and your hand is covered in small cuts from the glass. You could feel Joel’s piercing gaze on you as someone moves to help.

“I’m okay,” You say quickly, grabbing a rag and putting it around your hand.

“I uh, I’ll be back.” You mutter, humiliation growing as you shrink under the looks of everyone.

You rush out the back door. Sighing you put your head down on your knees as you slide down the wall. Your jealousy got the best of you and it feels so ugly. You slowly pick the glass out of your hand.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah I’m fine.” You look up and your eyes widen. There stands Lacy, the last person you expected to see.

“Are you sure? I can go get you some gauze.”

“I said I’m fine.” You snap. She takes a step back and you immediately feel the guilt.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that. I…I’m sorry.” You squeeze your eyes shut, hoping she leaves you alone so you can wallow in your misery.

“It’s okay,” She says gently. Lacy walks closer to you and you look up at her.

“I can’t help but feel like we’ve never really gotten along and I just wanted to say that I’m sorry if I did something to upset you.” Her words are so genuine that it makes you sick. She’s just so perfect and nice and it makes you feel awful.

“No no, you did nothing wrong. I promise. It’s all me.” She looks down next to you and you offer her to sit.

“I’m sorry if I came off cold, you’re really nice and It’s something to do with me.” You explain.

“You don’t have to tell me, but I’d really like to get to know you better if you want. Joel talks about you all the time.” She says. That catches your attention.

“He does?” You ask. She giggles and nods her head.

“Don’t tell him I told you but he really likes you, he just won’t admit it.” You can’t believe what she’s saying. It doesn’t make sense. He's so happy with her, and spends time with her. They’re perfect for each other.

“What? I thought you two were dating.” You look shocked as she shakes her head.

“We’re not. Me and Joel were both from the Boston QZ, I helped him out from time to time so we were kind of friends.” You guess that explains why he warmed up to her so fast but still.

“He won’t admit it to me but I know he likes you. He always wonders what you’re doing in town that day and when we go on supply runs he tries to subtly ask about things for you but he’s not very subtle.” She says, smiling as she remembers the shitty excuses Joel would make for picking up the tattered journal. He told her about you, that you used to keep one before the outbreak and you missed it. 

“I don’t know, I haven’t really seen him much lately…” You know it's partially your fault for avoiding him but he didn’t really make much effort to see you either.

“I told him to talk to you but he started to get nervous.” She says while rolling her eyes.

“Joel nervous?” “I know! He totally denied it when I asked. Said he doesn’t get nervous in that crabby voice he does.” She says while laughing.

“Oh my god he really does do that voice doesn’t he. Especially when he’s trying to reprimand Ellie.” You say while laughing with her.

“And she never listens.” Lacy adds. It feels nice to laugh with her. Though now you feel silly for feeling so jealous.

“I think I owe you an apology Lacy, the truth is I was jealous of you. You’re just, so amazing and cool and nice. I thought you were perfect for Joel and I just, I wanted to be perfect for Joel.” You admit sheepishly.

“You are perfect for him.” She hugs you and it takes you a moment before you hug her back.

“Everythin’ alright?” Joel’s voice makes you jump.

He’s come to check on the two of you. The butterflies you felt before come back in full force as you see him standing there. His eyes darting to your cut up hand.

“You should really get that fixed up.” He kneels down in front of you and checks your hand over. Lacy gets up and winks at you.

“I’ll leave you to it Joel,” She nudges him and he grumbles about something.

She smiles and gives you a thumbs up before disappearing back inside. Even though his hands are rough he handles yours with such care. Making sure not to hurt you as he checks for glass. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a rag and wraps it around your hand.

“This’ll be okay for now but you need to put some salve on it and wrap it with a bandage.” Joel finishes wrapping your hand but he doesn’t let go of your hand.

His hands are so warm. You notice how tense he seems. He’s nervous. With the boost of confidence from Lacy you bite the bullet and speak.

“I like you. A lot.” You confess.

“I uh-” He doesn’t know what to say as you take him by surprise.

“I was wondering if you wanted to go to dinner.” Your voice gets smaller as you speak. Worried that you were right and he doesn’t feel the same.

“I got you somethin’” He reaches into his little bag and pulls out a small book.

“You told me about keepin’ a diary and well I found this and thought you could start again, if you wanted to.” He hands it to you, it's a little ripped but still intact. It’s clearly been patched up. The leather cover has been cleaned and there's a new ribbon around the center.

“Oh Joel, it’s perfect.” You run your hands along the spine in awe.

“I would love to go to dinner with you darlin’’” He takes your hand and kisses the back of it. Helping you up he takes off his jacket and places it on your shoulders.

“Let me walk you back.” He places his hand on the small of your back.

You glance in the window of the bar and see Lacy talking with a few people. She makes them laugh and this time you smile. She catches your gaze and smirks, seeing Joel’s jacket and him so close. For once it feels like you can breathe, the bitter feelings are gone. It’s a new start, a new friend gained in Lacy and hopefully a new love that will last forever.

“Are you okay?” Joel asks as he notices you in your head. Looking over at him you smile and he pulls you closer.

“I’m perfect Joel, just perfect.”

[the-fab-fox]

OPPPPP, I JUUUUUST WOKE UP AND NOW I'M CRYING SO HARD.

Like I don't have schizophrenia but I do have a whole slew of mental health issues (ADHD, major depressive disorder, generalized anxiety disorder) as well as physical health problems (GERD and probably IBS-C and chronic pain when I wasn't on medical leave).

I'm now about to get off medical leave and get back to caregiving, but I'm so scared.. So so scared. Because unlike mor here, there's really no work from home jobs around here. Not any that aren't gonna be some kind of corporate bs company, in any case, and expect far too much work from their employees.

I love caregiving but I'm afraid my body won't let me do it anymore, my pain will come back and I'll have to either work til I die at work (since I feel I can't call out anymore now that I've been on leave since I live in America where they don't care if you're sick and often times tell you if you don't go in, even if you have a fever, then you're fired—yep this shit happens every day, especially thanks to at-will firing laws in states. Including mine.)

So I'm so glad mor has her stuff she can do. And I wish I could find something too because my home life is shit because my roommates are drama seeking (most likely) narcissists who don't feel happy unless drama goes down and keep trying to push me out. I'm so worried if I can't go to my work and my best friend isn't able to help (which I already feel horrible about all the help she has had to give me especially when it's stressful for her and she shouldn't have to do it).

Like mor. I feel so immature. I feel like I'm behind compared to everyone else. I hate that my body reacts as it does due to trauma in my past (pretty much my whole past prior to moving to Oregon was hell. Straight hell. But now in Oregon I'm still trying to pick up the pieces I was finally able to drop and get better but if anything, I feel worse.

I don't feel I have much more energy to give. I'm so happy here that mor has what they need though. So happy for them.

(I'll just keep setting the intention that my situation sorts itself through the help of my gods, so mote it be)

But ultimately thank you for making this. Because even though this seems more romantic (IDK if so as this is first I read), I think this can also help in terms of friends. So thank you.

It's the season 1 finale of Dom & Mor. I hope y'all enjoy this chapter that I put my heart and soul into!!

I cannot say enough how much it means to me that y'all want to learn about Dom & Mor and their lives together. They've been my lil angels for almost two decades now and to finally have them out in the world and adored by all my readers really means so much. See you in Season 2!!!

[itzy-bitsy-spidey]

"Maddie screaming and Ozzy's cough (pt.6)"

or "Something made a hole in my backyard pt.6"

Notes: Did I promise this chapter like two days ago? Yes, I did. Did I deliver it two days ago? No, I did not. But the sun shines on Green Hills and I´m finally done writing this thing! This one is the longest chapter yet, and I think that from now on they will only get longer as not to make too many chapters. But until then please enjoy this one!

Part 5

As it turned out Shadow was not half bad company, he was silent and he still distrusted you and just sat broodingly on the chair as you prepared your morning coffe. But he wasn´t all that bad.

It hadn´t been not even an entire day since he woke up, and even though you had fervently insisted that he stayed on the bed while you did stuff around the house he had not left you alone for even a second. You were pretty sure that he thought you were a secret agent of sorts and were going to attack him at any moment.

But, as long as he didn´t attack you first, you were fine with that, trust had always taken time. As for his health he seemed to be a lot better than the day before, if you asked him he would say that he was fine, nevertheless you had seen him wince more than once while walking.

So there you were, grinding coffee beans on your kitchen, while a weird hedghog looked at you as though he could see right through your very soul. And why were you grinding coffee beans, you might ask. Well, because for some reason, out of your knowledge, the old lady that owned the house had a taste for buying coffee beans, and as you were lazy, and did not planned to walk all the way to the store you were dealing with what you were handed. Coffee beans.

"What would you like for breakfast? I´ve got tea, tap water, I think there is some juice left in the fridge, and eventually there will be coffee" You said looking at Shadow before thinking again "Do hedghogs even drink coffee?" you whispered to yourself.

"We also have to find you something to eat..." You turned around to look around the kitchen for at least some bread. And as you had found it, and were stratching in order to grab it, you heard an awful crunching sound behind you.

Tha scene was almost comical, all the way from how you slowly turned to look at the hedghog with a confusion face, to Shadows litlle cheeks looking full as he munched on something, and even the face that you did when you realized that what he was eating was the coffee beans .

"Are you eating the coffee?"

He nodded, a look on his face that read "yes I am, what are you going to do about it?".

"You are aware that that is not how you consume coffee?" Another nod from him "That could seriously damage your digestive system"

"I am the ultimate life form, a mere plant shall not destroy me"

You pursed your lips together and nodded back. Your mind was debating in between worrying for him and laughing at how unfitting his voice was to his tiny body.

"Alright then ultimate life form, would you at least want a spoon?" You asked as you grabbed one for him.

He looked between your hand, your face, the coffee beans bag, and then back to your face; finally he nodded yet again and agreed with a simple "Yes, thank you".

"Alright, as soon as I´m done with this I need to go to my uncle´s house to check up on them and say hi" You told the hedghog so that he would know.

"You are leaving me on my own?" He questioned as he looked at you a little weird, you couldn´t really tell what he was thinking.

"Yes, I trust you won´t get yourself killed in a few hours, just don´t let people see you, if you get bored the tv is in the living room, you´ll entretain yourself" You explained as you finished drinking your coffee and picked up your jacket.

"You would leave me alone, in your home, even though you don´t know me at all? For all you know I could blow up your entire house" You coldn´t know when the guy was kidding, he seriously had such a deadpan-kind-of-angry face all the time.

"Please do not do that, I can´t afford it" You said as you finished picking up your stuff. Meanwhile he just sat there watching you, still eating the beans.

"Ok, bye" you didn´t even noticed when you gave him a little kiss in his forehead as a goodbye, maybe it was just the habit of greeting your parents like that, but it didn´t matter because neither did you see the hedghog looking at you perplexed as you left the house.

✶✧✶✧✶✧✶✧

The walk to your uncle´s hose had thankfully felt rather short, probably because Green Hills was a rather small town and you had rented a hose near his on purpose.

By the time you stood in his front door you were barely tired, but you still took a second to gather your breath, and you were about to knock on the door when you heard Tom loudly speaking with someone.

"You should have told me in the morning, are you absolutely sure about this?" He asked someone.

"I mean he matched the description Sonic gave me, I never saw him, but I just know it is him" You were able to recognize the voice, it was your aunt Maddie, though she sounded kind of electronic, so you assumed they were talking through a phone.

"But that is good news!" Tom exclaimed.

"Tom, he nearly killed you, I´m sorry if I´m not super excited about this" Someone almost killed your uncle? Did all of this had anything to do with his broken arm?

"So you want us to not tell them anything at all? Not even about Sonic and the others? It doesn´t sound fair, and what if he wakes up?" Now he sounded a little worried, and even though you had no idea what they were talking about, you had started to worry a little too.

"I´ll go get him today, I can not have him hurting someone else on my family"

You realized then that you had been eavesdropping for longer than you intended (which was, nothing at all) and so you decided to knock on the door.

You heard your uncle say something like "Wait, there´s someone at he door" and five seconds later he opened up.

"Hey kiddo! I wasn´t expecting you to be here so early" He greeted and hugged you, messing up your hair a little bit on the process.

"Yeah, I just tought that I would drop by, y´know, check you still had your other arm in one piece" you joked as you dropped on his couch as if it was your own house. You had tecnically been raised in this house as well as your own.

"Where´s Maddie?" You asked Tom as he plopped himself besides you and turned off the tv which was playing a telenovela.

"Oh you know she´s out with the kids..." It seemed he realized his choice off words as they slowly faded towards the end of the sentence.

"Kids?" You looked at him as if he had gone crazy in the last 24 hours "Are you feeling alright? First aliens, now kids..."

He almost jumped out of the couch as he started walking towards the kitchen "Oh you know, I meant the animals, she sometimes says her patients are like her kids, so it must have rubbed off on me".

Someone had to give it to that man, Tom Wachowski was no bad liar.

"Mhm... And does she always take Ozzy to the vet with her?" You asked even further, confused for the missing friendly dog.

"No!" He nearly screamed, at that point you had gotten up from your spot and followed him all the way into the kitchen. "Is just that Ozzy had a bad cough, so she wanted to check it out".

"Okay..." You reluctantly agreed to the explanation.

The rest of the morning went by smoothly, you two talked and you even helped him with patching up some holes in the walls that he blamed the racoons for. But lunch was fastly approaching and no matter how sad it made you to leave you had a hedghog to take care of.

But, first, you had to use the bathroom. You told your uncle that much (about going to the bathroom, not about the alien hedghog) and left for the upstairs bathroom, because, you simply liked it better.

As you were done with your business and were leaving the room you noticed something strange, unusual for most of the times you had been to the Wachowski home.

The attic door was down. Right there, in the middle of the hallway.

Assuming that your Uncle had gone up to put something away, or sothing of sorts, you decided to go up to check it out. What you certainly were not expecting was the way the place was fixed up, there were comic books everywhere, a puff, and what looked like three small beds. The sudden sound of the front door banging was what took you out of your inspection.

Quikly you made your way down the stairs, and the closer you got to the front door the more you could hear your auntie screaming.

"...They were not there! And neither was him! I´m telling you, he did something to them!" You could hear her and you were sure that anyone that was outside on the sidewalk could as well.

"Maddie, calm down, they´re okay!" Tom was definitely trying to get a word in, but his wife´s shouts wouldn´t let him.

"What´s wrong, who´s missing?" You asked as you finally arrived to the place they were both standing.

Maddie whipped her head around so quickly you feard she would snap her neck, and then she just looked at you as if she could not believe you were standing there.

Tom telling her that "he tried to explain it to her" went over your head as a fluffy animal walked into the house.

"Ozzy! How´re you doing girl? Is your cough better?" You asked as you petted the animal which was constantly trying to lick your face.

"Are you alright?" Maddie asked as she knelt besides you. You laughed.

"Yeah, why wouldn´t I be?"

That answer seemed to calm her down as she stood up and left to talk to Tom.

"Dad! I know you said we had to go out for some time to take in some sun, but Tails scrapped his knee, and so we had to come back..." You heard a voice that suddenly went silent as it stood behind you.

You turned around, your aunt and uncle besides you.

There, in the front door of your uncle´s house, stood a perfect blue copy of Shadow.

"I´m sorry, why did nobody told me my cousin had come home?" It spoke.

And then you fainted.

Taglist:@boogiemansbitch@vxllys@whoisgami@baby-bloos@sapphireravensworld@mothmanperson@4rm-the-mf-concrete@eliknowsnothing@pooplyface1423

[emometalhead]

.

[achilleabee]

girlhood is getting these ads EVERYWHERE as a teenage girl/afab who is either queer, hates children and/or actively wants their uterus removed because it only causes issues

[tehamelie]

I remember my childhood vividly, so let me tell you what slacking off on sexual education does for your kids.

And bear in mind, my mom really tried. She was a fearless educator - kindergarten teacher - she took all my questions seriously, she taught me about my body as soon as she thought I was old enough to learn to shower by myself, she provided literature, youth health magazines, I mean, I learned how porn is bad for teaching anything about how sex works before I was seven.

It's just that she couldn't keep up with me. When I was five I had figured out enough to lead my kindergarten's kids in a 12 people free for all game of Doctor. There was a smaller girl, and this haunts me, she was three or four and she clearly knew what you were supposed to do.

See, if kids don't get sexual education they don't know how to recognize the signs of abuse, and they and their friends can be sexually abused and they won't know that's not supposed to happen.

That wasn't the end of my troubles, either. I was abused by an older boy when I was eight and I didn't figure it out for 20 years. I ignored how uncomfortable I was in my body by largely learning to ignore everything about my body, which kept me from understanding I was trans for 35 years.

And there's people out there who don't want to talk to their kids about sex at all because it's embarrassing for them? Grow the fuck up.

*i.e the entire realm of issues relating to both the act of sex & the sexed parts of the body

[thelastspeecher]

Got the results from my heart monitor!

And I am in fact having cardiac things (rapid heart rate, extra beats) happening when I feel symptoms, so it's not just me being a hypochondriac!

But we'll see what my cardiologist wants to do about it. It's worse than the last time I had a heart monitor, but idk if it rises to the level of doing something right now. Might just be a "we'll continue to watch it" thing.

[aptericia]

more thoughts

I think over the past five-ish years I’ve gone from wanting to die and hating myself for it to wanting to live life to the fullest and somehow also hating myself for it.

Because I was musing on this post again and I think my feelings come down to the fact that when I’ve failed at things before, it was because I didn’t try that hard; that is, I didn’t want to succeed. And now with my condition, it’s more apparent that reason I’m failing at things is because I can’t succeed. The latter situation is much scarier and more humiliating because it’s out of my control. I can’t just brush it off by saying “eh, well it didn’t matter that much anyway.” But honestly? I don’t think there’s a clear distinction between the two situations. With executive dysfunction (currently my most debilitating symptom) especially, it can be impossible to tell the difference between physical capability and mental desire.

All this to say, I feel like maybe my condition isn’t even the problem. Yeah it’s a massive pain and totally unfair, but I’m still theoretically able to enjoy life. The real problem is that college is fucking hard! And since my health took this hit, it doesn’t mean I CAN’T complete school, just that the steps I’d need to take to do so would probably make me miserable & unable to live my life the way I want.

And theoretically that realization should make it easy to decide!! Like I said at the beginning, I care about my own happiness now. I’ve worked so hard to gain appreciation for my existence, to find immense amounts of joy in the mundane, to discover things I want to share and experience and create, and that is absolutely precious to me. I can think of so many experiences more worthwhile than struggling through college (because again, the only way now to get through college would be to struggle). But I’m so, so embarrassed to make that call. I don’t want to be “another college dropout.” I don’t want to be “another uneducated once-homeschooled adult.” I don’t want to be “another starving artist.” I hate myself for daring to prioritize my fulfillment in life over the judgement of others.

So maybe I’m not even ashamed that I’m disabled. What I’m ashamed about is the possibility of not having the lifestyle that other people want/expect me to have. And my condition has forced me to make a choice between that lifestyle and my actual happiness.

Sometimes I wish I could just erase myself from the memory of everyone who knew me before, like, 2022 or so. Everyone who knew me when I was an able-bodied straight-A student who never shared her own thoughts or took up space. Everyone who told me I was going to do great things because I was so good at STEM. Everyone who told me I was such a kind person who always prioritized others. Also, everyone who told me I was always going to end up struggling because I didn’t exercise enough or wanted to be an artist or whatever, and had no idea that the real reason would be because of a sudden disability. I still love you all, but I just don’t want to give your judgements any place in my life anymore.

vent

Guys, I really don’t want to. I really really don’t want to admit that I’m disabled.

I’m supposed to be lucky. I’m 100% physically safe and financially secure. I have wonderful parents who prioritize my health and happiness and gave me a far better education than most of my peers got. I have been surrounded my compassionate and accepting people my whole life. And even in addition to how privileged I am, I’ve done really well for myself. It was so, so fucking hard to pull myself away from suicidal ideation and to not just “not hating” myself, but actually being proud… and I did it. I’ve worked really hard on the things I love and I’m good at them. I’m good at being independent, but I also know how to ask for help. I challenge myself and I let myself rest. I try things and I learn things. And I sure have used all those skills to try to get myself out of, or at least learn to cope with, my current situation.

I was so proud of myself this week for finally, finally doing my chores and schoolwork early, despite so many failed attempts to do so. I already know resting doesn’t help (I tried that first, and I tried it a lot) and at last I actually succeeded in pushing myself. I told myself that if I just got everything done, I could get ahead, I could rest later. And guess what? I never got any fucking rest. I never got ahead. I don’t feel even the slightest bit better.

I hate it, I hate it so so much that I’ve done everything right. I hate that all the odds are stacked in my favor. I hate that I spent so long learning to even want to be happy, and yet now I can’t be. I hate that I can’t blame myself or anyone else for what’s wrong with me, not because I want to be angry at something, but because I want to have some direction in where to start and how to get my life back. Admitting I’m disabled means admitting that the person who bullied me was right, that there’s nothing I can do, that I’m actually just Less Smart, Less Strong, Less Fortunate. And it makes me scared that she was also right about the consequences of that. That I’m not worth accomodating, that it’s unfair to make others deal with me, that I’m a burden.

I truly don’t hate myself any more. But sometimes I wish I did. because at least then I wouldn’t be so angry at all the shit I have to deal with.

[e-adlirez]

Treasure Seekers 2 go brrrrr

So this sequel... exists :D

Welcome to the second entry in the Treasure Seekers trilogy that I'm gonna ramble about for the next six hours (in me time, in you time it's probably gonna be like thirty minutes or less), if you wanna read it yourself before reading this ramble, here's an Archive copy. Otherwise, enjoy the ride :D

So our story begins with the Thea Sisters locked in a basement in the dark, with Russia's penchant for matches (and the basement's lack of a smoke alarm) coming in clutch. Seems like another vacation's gone awry for them :3 How could it have possibly turned out this way?

Flashback: so the girls are vibing in Moscow, visiting all the cool sights and all that, Pam is wanting to try some Russian cuisine, when they spot this girl that's wearing what appears to be a barrette that used to belong to Aurora's sister Hannah Lane. They follow her a bit, find a THUG JUMPSCARE, follow the girl, Cassidy and co into the building they're heading into, and oh dear door with passcode is in the way. They find this dood Sergei, explain to him the situation, deal with him being like "who is u, and wth are you on about mate" until they hear a scream and oh dear turns out that girl with the barrette is Sergei's sister Irina and she's in trouble.

Sergei opens the door, they go in, walk in on Cassidy, Stan and Max (who I will from now call SM for simplicity) doing their whole thug jumpscare thing and kidnapping Irina in 4K. SM somehow rolls a high enough strength roll (or the girls roll a low enough initiative) that two roughly intimidating guys successfully trap six people into a basement without breaking a sweat get yourself some self-defense classes girls oml, and that's the end of that.

Luke's up to his shenanigans again, and it seems that he's targeted Irina Lenenko for the same reason the girls double-taked at the sight of her barrette: Irina (and Sergei in conjunction) is a descendant of Hannah Lane, and Hannah Lane may or may not have known a thing or two about one of the seven treasures. It's such a shame tho that Irina doesn't wanna spill any of the tea. What's this about a "queen's jewel"?

Oh also Luke has Aurora's third diary. I would like you to pay attention to this detail in particular. Oh and he's keeping Irina ratgrabbed until she tells them what he wants to know from her. Oh naur

Meanwhile the girls infodump all of the TS 1 LANE LOORRREEEE to Sergei in one whole sitting and finally manage to get around to "what the hell does this have to do with my sister". Sergei thinks it's not really possible for Irina to know anything about great-grandma Hannah's involvement with Aurora, but Irina's still in trouble soooo time to solve this nerdy-ass science trivia keypad puzzle to get outa the basement. Irina's nowhere to be found in the lab itself, so they regroup at Sergei's place to use his phone tracker app on his computer.

Bad news, SM dumped Irina's phone somewhere in the lab so the tracker app is useless; good news, while looking for some Lane Lore™ to get some context about the situation, the girls find some Lane Lore™ :D

-

Turns out Aurora was looking for one of the seven treasures again, y'know just updating her sister on that, who'd moved to Saint Petersburg with her husband Ivan.

Seems like Aurora's quest at the time involved "the queen's jewel", which Aurora said she was 1000% down to ramble about to Hannah, maybe when she's done finding all seven treasures and hiding them from Jan.

I would like to take this moment to remind you that Aurora is a British Amelia Earhart, and if you dunno what that means, look up what Earhart was famous for and then look at this with that given context :']

-

With that lead, the girls plus Sergei take a ride on presumably the Krasnaya Strela night train to Saint Petersburg, read some Lane Lore on the way, Peter-Griffin upon realizing that they spent the whole night reading AO3 fanfics Aurora's diaries and it's like 2AM now, land in Saint Petersburg, stop by Nevsky Prospekt Street to have some breakfast (I think they went to Venezia?), and discussion.

(For the rest of this review, please assume when I say "the girls", I'm including Sergei because Sergei tags along with them and helps them out in their entire journey. It's okay, Sergei may be biologically male but he is an honorary female in our hearts /j)

Aurora mentioned the queen's jewel in her diary, and when you're in Russia, the first queen that comes to mind is Catherine II, so maybe something relating to her? Some Lane Lore of Aurora taking interest in Catherine II's Amber Room in her palace specifically confirms their theories, sooooooooo it's time to go to the Amber Room to see if Aurora left any clu--

The girls are about to walk out of the Catherine Palace to Peter Griffin in private when SM JUMPSCARE--

So SM is stalkin' around the Catherine Palace looking for something, so the girls stalk them back and follow them out of the palace, into a car (the girls called a separate taxi to follow them), and to a little gray building in the outskirts of the city. They don't follow SM into the building because it might be dangerous, but Irina's scarf lying around near the premises confirms that Irina was in fact there and possibly being held hostage in the building.

The girls do a little tactic I like to call "the Ding Dong Ditch": Pam and Nicky knock on the door, SM answers it, do a little Metal Gear exclamation point "HOW DID YOU GET HERE", Nicky and Pam book it so SM chases them, and that's literally how the other girls plus Sergei sneak into the building to get Irina out. (You dunno how badly I wanted to make a videogame reference for this but I couldn't find anything so here we are--)

With that, the girls plus the Lenenko siblings book it outa there without SM being none the wiser (seriously it doesn't even cross their mind that there are more than two Thea Sisters, that's how dum they are). Irina books a hotel room at a friend's place and gives them some extra Lane Lore that she never told Klawitz despite the interrogations:

Hannah Lane was once visited by Aurora unexpectedly, a little after Hannah and her husband moved to a house near the Ob River, in Siberia. Possible lead :3c? The girls think maybe, so they decide to head on over to the exact address in Novosibirsk, Siberia.

In Siberia, the girls cross the frozen Ob River in Novosibirsk to this abandoned little house, where they find this little note with a riddle that talks about Cleopatra and an emerald she had at one point, and CASSIDY JUMPSCARE--

Cassidy busts in, snatches the note and books it away on her snowmobile before the girls can even react. You may be wondering, how the hell did Cassidy get there and know where they were? The answer is the same as the reason behind the SM jumpscares in Russia and in book 1, and that is Luke.

Luke Von Klawitz is doing a little segment that I like to call: Luke Touch Grass, where it becomes increasingly clear that Luke's spent way too much time on 4Chan (/j but you'll see what I mean). Luke hears about SM's failure and facepalms. Then he calls his friend Petrovski, who has access to the database of all of Russia's airports, for help tracking down "six mice leaving Saint Petersburg". Petrovski gives him results in minutes: the girls and Sergei are leaving Saint Petersburg and heading for Novosibirsk, Siberia (most likely Tolmachevo Airport). With that intel, Klawitz looks into his own database of Aurora Beatrix Lane, finds a picture of Hannah and Aurora together, and uses his own version of Google Lens to figure out the exact coordinates where the picture was taken, which happens to be in Novosibirsk, Siberia.

No this man does not in fact canonically touch grass on the regular, who's asking

Anyway so he sent Cassidy the coords, instructions and Aurora's diary to go, and that's how Cassidy walked in on the girls in that little abandoned hut next to Ob River. Only thing is uh, she dropped her purse on the way out. A purse that just so happened to contain Aurora's diary that Luke gave her.

So the girls scoop that puppy up and assume that the treasure is Cleopatra's emerald, thus they think it's in Egypt.

So the girls go to Egypt :D (29 and a half hour flight there good god no wonder they conked out in the plane--)

The girls read some Lane Lore, something about Aurora finding the treasure and hiding it somewhere in a desert, in an "expanse pure and white" that a star compass will lead to. First thing the girls think of at the desert bit is the White Desert (Sahara el Beyda), specifically a spot near Cleopatra's pool, so they leave the airport (not realizing Cassidy is following them now) and head over to a market to buy some supplies because might I remind you, they initially went to Moscow, Russia for vacation.

While in the market, Pam meets a guy named Omar. Pam tells him a little bit about them going to Cleopatra's pool in Sahara el Beyda, and she finds out that Omar just so happens to be an Archaeology major in Oxford University who's here on his summer vacation and works as a guide for Sahara el Beyda, and is more than down to give the girls a tour. Talk about lucky :D

The next day the girls take the scenic route and after a while make it to Siwa, where Omar books a room in a hotel for them, and the girls find this interesting myth there about Cleopatra that I will summarize here:

Cleopatra was once given a jewel that maxes out the owner's rizz and the effect is supposedly indefinite. Cleopatra liked the jewel so much that she wore it on her crown at all times... until she grew a bit self-conscious about the gem's maxxed rizz effect and how everyone kept eyeing the emerald a second too long for comfort, so she decided to hide away said rizz in a spot where none of her rivals could get to it. Oh and uh Cleopatra wrote up a dedication to Ra that's hella cryptic too.

One long rest later, the girls go to Cleopatra's pool on a donkey cart. Yes, a donkey cart. It was Omar's idea. Speaking of Omar, prepare yourself buddy because the girls have dubiously decided to give you some Lane Lore to chew on. O-oh you like it a lot. A lot a lot. Well okay cool, maybe you can help out, cool.

The girls manage to figure out the riddle in Cleopatra's dedication, find a little stone coffer that has the queen's treasure and-- SM JUMPSCARE

With a donkey as the girls' only escape method and Omar having suddenly disappeared, a scuffle ensues where the girls play hot potato with the box until SM gets their hands on it and opens it, and here we get a very accurate depiction of what SM and the girls found in the box once it was actually opened.

Description: a hand made of salt shaped in an upside-down "ok" symbol, circa 1920s-30s.

The sheer whiplash of this leaves both sides of the conflict losing enough HP that they're all on red-- SM is blaming the girls for this (how dare >:[) and dip. Omar is gone, and all the girls get as compensation is the empty box and a letter from Aurora telling them that they'll know to read the hidden clues. The girls head back feeling very hollow and dead inside, and this is the one time one of the girls questions how the hell did SM know they were at Siwa. I mean they never get any answer to this (kinda), but it is a milestone! They're aware of it now!

Once they get back to Cairo, they ask around and find that Omar's completely up and vanished, and they decide they'll just head back to Moscow since their investigation has come to a dead end. On the way, Pam comments about the falafel she bought being hella salty, which leads Violet to an epiphany that hey, the Sahara isn't the only desert that exists, let alone the only desert known for how white it is (like how Boracay Beach is known for how white and fine its sand is, but it's not the only white sand beach that exists). A quick Google search (and a long flight (35 HOURS CAIRO TO SUCRE???)) leads them to the Salar de Uyuni in Bolivia.

Nicky reserves a room for them at Hotel Luna Salada (a real place you can book a stay at actually :D), and they make a friend by the name of Adriana, a local waitress in the hotel restaurant. Adriana helps them pick out a dessert, fills them in on some stuff about the Salar since the girls came here 100% out of impulse, and talks about possible itinerary locations to go to, like the Isla de Pescado, Tiwanaku (the "Gate of the Sun"), Lake Titiaca, and Laguna Colorada. Y'know, typical tourist stuff, and Adriana was so kind to show them pictures she took when she visited said places herself! :D

Anyway so while the girls long rest, Luke is mulling about in his base waiting for updates. Someone calls him about the whole Egypt thing, and Luke calls the girls incompetent? Rude, oh and something about the caller being Luke's "secret weapon". Cassidy calls him on a theory she has about the gemstone being in Cleopatra's palace, and since the girls are currently long-resting (which means they aren't doing anything), Luke figures that a little diving trip in Alexandria to search for the gem with Cassidy won't hurt. Besides, he still has his secret weapon.

Oh yeah and he knows the girls are long resting because he has a drone in Bolivia spying on them and showing him their every move. Touch grass, Luke. No, going on a diving trip in Alexandria doesn't count, there's barely any grass there /j

Morning comes in Bolivia, and the girls head out early to search the Salar as much as they can. They look around the flat white desert, eat some late breakfast, toy around with forced perspective camera shenanigans for a bit, and read up on some LANE LOOORREEEEE

So Aurora's been to Pumapunku and Tiwanaku which is cool, she paid a visit to the archaeological site probably and that's really cool. She says something about hiding the queen's treasure in a fish's stomach covered in very fine thorns. Sergei ends up having an epiphany, and that leads the girls to Isla de Pescado, which just so happens to be "Fish Island" in Spanish, and has cacti on it, it's all coming together :D

Oh and the fish drawing Aurora made is coords to the treasure seemingly so that's cool-- OMAR JUMPSCARE

The girls are very surprised to find Omar joining them, and Omar explains that he booked it when SM came over and lost his cellphone as a result. However, he managed to figure out that Aurora's riddle was about salt and not sand, and decided to head on over to Bolivia since he assumed that's where the girls are going. How did he find them? It was just out of pure coincidence, and also the fact that the girls are extremely recognizable. Hm.

Anyway, Paulina plugs the coordinates into her GPS and leads the girls plus Omar to a little cave at the bottom of a little embankment. The girls find that, lo and behold, there's an old tin box containing a bright green emerald!

Meanwhile Luke is not finding anything in Alexandria haha L, LVK L get dunked on Luke, Cassidy girlie that's not a man to simp for find someone else gurl-- oh dear Luke is alerted that the treasure has been found and now he's planning on heading over to Bolivia? Now how could he possibly know that?

In the meantime, I dunno what's up in the air or if it's the Archaeology major speaking in him but Omar's really invested in this treasure, even more so than the girls to the degree that the girls are a little freaked out by it-- RHEA JUMPSCARE-- Paulina calms the big bord down and gets it to not trample Omar please, he's still a friend of theirs. Colette picks up this blue notebook Omar seems to have dropped.

The girls plus Omar head back to the SUVs, and Omar is really trying to persuade the girls that he should bring it back to Cairo. The girls are not jazzed at the idea because Omar bringing it back alone will be too unsafe, y'know with Luke and Cassidy and SM and all. They gotta think about this rationally-- WHOA OKAY OMAR calm your man tits buddy why are you demanding they trust you like you automatically deserve your trust-- ohh that's how Klawitz has known about the girls' whereabouts, Omar was working as a double agent.

So yeah Omar snatches the box from Colette and drives off in his SUV, leaving the girls in the dust. The girls freak out and are feeling that EMOTIONAL DAMAGE, but Colette for some reason is very calm about Omar booking it with the emerald. And that's because SHE HAS IT :D she did a lil' switcheroo so now the emerald's with her while the box is with Omar.

For context about how Colette knew about this, remember the blue notebook Omar dropped? Yeah that notebook was a company LVK notebook, straight from Luke himself. Then after Colette saw it, everything about Omar became incredibly sus, so she performed this precautionary measure.

So now the girls talk to the local authorities about how the whole thing with the emerald is gonna go down, and soon the girls are waiting for a plane back to Moscow.

As for Omar, well, he goes over to Luke's super-fancy hotel in La Paz, Bolivia, and he hands the box to Luke, explicitly stating that he decided he'd let Luke open it before he himself can appreciate it.

Luke opens the box, and here we see an accurate depiction of what Luke sees.

Description: an upside-down "ok" symbol drawn in strawberry pink lip balm, signed Colette [insert last name], circa 2018.

Luke punts the box (prolly with the lip balm still inside it) into the swimming pool, tells Omar to get out, and that's the end of that. Haha Omar L Luke L

The girls head back to Moscow to drop Sergei off when SURPRISE PARTY BY IRINA'S SQUAD :DDD

Then the girls are about to return to Whale Island to presumably Peter Griffin in their dorms, when Colette suggests they make a journal a la Aurora Beatrix Lane, and they do. In a pink notebook because it was Colette's idea so we might as well give her that

And they take a black-and-white group picture of them wearing adventurer clothes like Aurora would've done. The brainrot is real, these girls are mentally ill /j

And that's the book :D

... Honestly it's the most meh out of the trilogy besides the big-brain bits in the middle and the end imo

The writing was so much more stilted in this one, even for Scholastic standards, and everything feels pretty..... kid's book. Even more so than the usual in the book's English translations. I do readings for the books in some of my Discords, and this book did not read well at aaallll. And I haven't even mentioned the typos in the book (they're not a lot, but they exist, and they're kinda egregious :D) and some grammar errors if I'm remembering things correctly. It might just be a translation thing-- I worry a bit for the translator who had to put this together.

Luke's character here is also kinda wonk? For one we see him directly contradict his anti-friendship spiel in TS 1 since he literally greets Petrovski like a friend (maybe it's a "friendship doesn't exist except in 4Chan" thing, I dunno). Then in the middle of the book, he gets... very Disney villain-y. The most egregious example here is the chapter "Lurking in the Shadows", where as you can see

I am confusion?? Luke has been described as a to-the-point brat who hardly cares for the means to his end (unless it will impact his ability to achieve the end) and is so fixated on his goal that he doesn't touch grass. Is this not-touching-grass behavior? Yeah, definitely, but this??? This is too Disney villain???? Why does the man break into an evil cackle in front of Cassidy???? I understood it in book 1 because man thinks he's doing a "You may think you have outsmarted me but I have OUTSMARTED YOUR OUTSMARTING", but this one?? Maybe it's my personal taste, but it's too cartoonish and too... deviated from what we know of him up to this point.

ALSO TWIRLING HIS MUSTACHE? WHAT MUSTACHE IS HE TWIRLING THAT THING IS NOT TWIRL-ABLE

Also time to address the one big plot hole in this book: Aurora's diary.

So in this book there's only one diary, which is infinitely simpler than the two we got in the first book. This diary supposedly contains Aurora's records of her mission in hiding Cleopatra's Rizzmerald, and the details are supposedly vague enough that Luke felt the need to kidnap and interrogate Irina, a Hannah Lane descendant, to fill in the blanks. However, when you look at the contents of the diary itself (which lord knows how many times Luke himself has looked through it), there's hardly any blanks that need to be filled, at least if you're Luke.

The diary itself is mostly in the background-- like I said, not as much Lane Lore here as the previous book, the girls mostly rely on Aurora's letters to Hannah here-- but there's one specific entry the girls read in the latter half of the book that explicitly mentions Pumapunku and Tiwanaku, and how Aurora is there for her mission to hide the emerald. Complete with coordinates hidden in a little drawing! My one question I have for Luke is, why didn't he go straight to Bolivia and started searching there? Why did he go through all the effort of kidnapping Irina, tailing the girls around Sahara el Beyda, letting SM fall for the salt replica gambit, left his base to touch grass and go on a dive with Cassidy in Egypt; all if he could've just gone straight to Bolivia to look for the treasure there? Sure, Aurora did a good job hiding the coordinates in the fish doodle, but someone as observant and as obsessed about the outcome instead of the journey like Luke would rather have sidestepped all the Aurora shenanigans and beelined straight to the goal if he was able to.

Luke hardly has an excuse here because he owned the diary at the start of the book, and most definitely read through it many times (and we know he's the type to do this, see TS 1). The plot hole is plot hole-ing, it seems :/

Maybe it was just an excuse for the girls to get a giant glowing arrow pointing in the direction of the treasure? It certainly feels like it.

Anyway, the things that carry this book and made it memorable when I first read it (and allowed me to ignore the iffy bits) are the gottems and Omar as a character. Aurora setting up a salt replica of the Rizzmerald as a gottem in a time capsule, only to be opened almost a hundred years later to still be as potent as intended when it was made so long ago? That is amazing, like c'mon, pure comedy material.

Even funnier is Colette doing the exact same thing, only with her lip balm. Luke is quaking in his bougie-ass leather boots.

Now for Omar. This may be a hot take of mine here, but Omar's sus-ness is actually at a decent level compared to the girls and what they usually deal with. On one hand, Omar is incredibly suspicious with how incredibly lucky the girls are to find an Archaeology Oxford major working as a Sahara el Beyda tour guide; but on the other hand, the girls had almost the exact same situation with Diego in Mexico (I didn't mention him in the first review, but he came in clutch in TS 1).

The girls met Diego in Merida, Mexico, and he helped them with their research into "the invisible place", which happened to be Uxmal, along the Puuc Route. Diego also just so happened to be a tour-guide-in-training for the Puuc Route, which was the place the girls just so happened to need to go to find Aurora's second journal.

In comparison, the girls meet Omar in Khan El-Khalili while they were looking for supplies for their trip to the Siwa Oasis. It comes up in conversation that the girls are headed to Siwa, and Omar just so happened to be a tour guide for Sahara el Beyda, which was where the Siwa Oasis is, and it just so happened to be where the girls needed to go. When you stack them up together, it made perfect sense that the girls thought they could trust him-- Diego didn't know much about their trip and helped them the best he could (which was a lot), so why wouldn't Omar do the same? He's an Oxford Archaeology major, too, for crying out loud, the girls struck gold in the end!

Gold that was too shiny and too good to be true. Gold that was, in the end, nothing more than pyrite, fool's gold.

Omar is a good case for why you should be careful with who you trust, and when you should start thinking a little bit when you're getting a little too lucky with the people you meet. When the girls got to know him a little more and decided to trust him and tell him the deal with their trip, he got way invested in the gem-- too invested to not be a little bit suspicious. Maybe the girls mistook it for his passion for his archaeology major, maybe they mistook it for something else-- but whatever the case, Omar pulled the cheesecloth over the girls' eyes and really only fell apart near the end, when his alibis and behavior started becoming more and more suspicious; and by then, Omar didn't need to be as inconspicuous, and the girls had gotten to know him too much to readily say to him "okay buddy can you kindly f%ck off, your vibes are not vibing here".

The girls probably should've been suspicious when Omar reappeared in Bolivia out of nowhere, but I guess his alibi was just good enough (and the girls at this point were probably running on adrenaline, caffeine and a brain on 70% capacity at most) to pass the Deception check.

Fr tho there were some bits where the girls should've found him sus but they didn't (him accidentally saying "I did it" when they uncovered the emerald, and also him handling the emerald the way he did), so shrugs. It could be a translation thing, but it could also be something else.

Anyway, kinda meh for a sequel, but it does have its standouts that allow it to somewhat stand on the same level as the first and third books. Kinda.

Hey, at least it's not as bad as Crystal Fairies-- that's the bar of bad-ness I'm setting. It's not as bad as Crystal Fairies and that's what matters--

Also special thanks to @ishmeowwow (it won't let me ping you for some reason bestie <:[) for making the lil' artworks haha

[roguetaxidermyy]

me having gone to bed at 6 am every day for the past week and generally spiraling mentally while rotting in bed waking up this morning: a 4 mile hike in the heat is a really good idea right now, and while we're at it let's start like 3 art projects

[cosmogyros]

.

[talentforlying]

one of these days i'm going to write up all that i've changed from azzarello's bullshit era and the one (1) piece i've kept from milligan (and also changed) and the only thing currently stopping me is that it is going to be so, so inside-baseball incomprehensible. and i almost never want to go reading/screencapping azzarello and milligan to add references but i Want to add references.

canon is goop, just know that we continue to ride the bus down "hellblazer ended at #250 and looks like swiss cheese before that" street.

[floral-hex]

ayyyyyyy I set up an appointment for medication this Friday (telemedicine but whatever) and I get to see my former therapist again later this month. I’m kind of excited. More than kind of. Little sad, but I’m lonely and want to talk to someone. He’s a real cool dude. I’m a little worried to trauma dump the last 6 months on him, but whatever, it beats sitting there for an hour feeling like I’m wasting his time and struggling to think of things to say. dang dang dang, I’m excited.

[beautifel]

the way i’m truly so beyond help