#or maybe we're the only us we've got but all the reassurance i have left is haptic feedback when i feel sick for no reason

[lanteanserver]

I think technically speaking, I'm not an Irish Catholic or an English Catholic, but I'm a Ro[a]m[i/a]n{g} Cat{-}holic until and unless they excom{m/eow}nicate me, and really, if they're going to do that,

[hinatastinygiant]

1 | Vdekja

Pairing: Uzui x Fem!Reader

The Emptiness You Left

"Y/N, I'm scared," your little sitter whispers to you as she clings onto your arm. The two of you and your younger brother sit in a small crate, listening to the sounds of screams and moans echo through the night.

"I know," you tell her, "I am too. But you can't cry." You put a finger to your lips to emphasize your point, looking at her tear-filled eyes. "Just look at Inosuke. Look at how brave he's being," you then say as you look at your brother who is sitting in the corner of the crate, his knees pulled up to his chest.

She nods, wiping her tears.

Suddenly, a loud shriek rings in your ears and the sound of something being dragged away follows. She begins to sniffle again and you have to shush her once more. "Hey, hey, look at me," you tell her. "Everything will be okay. Just trust me, alright?"

"B-but we're going to all get separated!" she exclaims.

You're about to tell her that's not true when the door to your crate suddenly slams open and a pair of hands reach in and grab you by the hair. You're pulled out and meet face-to-face with a blond man with the wildest eyes you've ever seen before. You're pretty sure they look like rainbows, but you're probably just seeing things.

He pulls you to your feet and pushes you against the outside of the crate. He then stares at you in what you can only describe as hatred and anger.

But when he speaks, you hear the complete opposite, and it makes your head spin even faster. "Who are you?" he asks softly.

"Y/N, sir," you answer.

"What are you doing here?" he then asks.

"M-my family got evicted from where we were staying and we had no choice but to go out on the streets. We've been there for almost a week, and then some people came and grabbed us," you explain, hoping that he'll understand why you're in the situation you're in. Maybe he's not as bad as you thought.

"And your parents?" he questions, leaning so close to you that you can see your reflection in his eyes.

"They're...they're dead," you whisper.

He pauses and looks back to the crate. "You have two little ones with you, too? Such a good big sister you are," he says.

Your face begins to heat up. "It's my duty as an older sibling."

"I understand," he sighs, taking a step back. "I'm not going to kill you, Y/N. You don't have to be so afraid. In fact, I am going to take all three of you with me. Does that sound okay?"

You nod slowly, your hands shaking. You don't have any reason to doubt him, so you'll just trust him. "Thank you."

"Don't thank me yet," he tells you, grabbing your hand and dragging you along. "Come along, now."

"But...what about them?" you ask.

"Don't worry, they're coming with us," he reassures. "Come on, now you two! Hurry up or you'll get left behind!"

As the two of you walk away, your little brother and his sitter crawl out of the crate and follow behind the two of you. The four of you then make your way into a car, and as soon as you're all inside, the driver takes off.

"So," the man starts, "where do you live?"

"Nowhere," your brother scoffs quietly, earning a nudge in the arm from you.

"What my brother means to say is that we were living in an abandoned building. It's gone now, though," you explain, hoping that the man won't question any further.

"How tragic," he mutters. "And your parents? When did they die?"

"A long time ago," you answer as you look down at your little sister. "Right after my sister was born. There was an attack. Both of our parents died and we were sent to an orphanage. Until they kicked us out because of my age."

The man nods, "I understand. You're an adult now, so you're no longer a child."

"But Y/N is my sister," your little sister cries. "You can't just sell her off like that!"

The man laughs softly and leans forward to pat your little sister on her head. "Don't worry, dear, that's not what I intend on doing."

"I-it's not?" she questions.

"Of course not," he smiles, and you can't help but feel slightly uncomfortable. "You three will be staying with me until further notice. I have a big home, too. It's called Eternal Paradise Faith."

"Woah," she gleams. "What's it like?"

"Well, it's a big building for people who have nowhere else to go," he tells her. "I'm the leader of it."

"So...we'll be working for you?" you ask.

"Only if you want to," he replies just as the car goes over a bump. Your stomach churns, and for a second you think you're going to be sick. "Do not worry, this is just a short ride. We're almost there."

Sure enough, you arrive at a large building shortly after. When you get inside, you are all given the same clothes and brought into separate rooms to sleep.

The rainbow-eyed man comes to check in on you that night with a plate of food. "I know you must be starving," he says as he sets the plate down next to you.

"I'm not very hungry," you mumble.

"You don't have to lie," he smiles, his hands in his pockets.

"I just want to see my siblings," you explain.

"And you will, after the three of you get a good night's sleep," he says, walking to the door. "Goodnight, Y/N."

"Wait," you call out just as he reaches the door.

"Yes?"

"What's your name?" you ask.

"Doma."

You pause for a moment. "Thank you, Doma."

"No need to thank me. You should be thanking the one who gave me this opportunity," he tells you before disappearing into the hall. What the hell is that supposed to mean?

That night, you struggle to sleep. Although the mattress you're on is extremely comfortable, your mind is racing and your stomach is twisting and turning. You can't imagine how your younger siblings are feeling. So, you decide to sneak out of your room and quietly sneak down the hallway to find them.

It doesn't take long until you hear the sounds of your little sister crying. You whisper her name and quietly step in her room. Immediately, she wraps her arms around you and begins to cry harder.

"It's okay," you soothe, hugging her tightly.

"I-I'm scared," she sniffles.

"Don't be. We're going to be alright," you tell her. "This is a good place for us to stay for now. It's like living with a rich person."

"But..." she hiccups, "will we still see each other?"

"Yes," you smile, remember that's what Doma promised you earlier. "After we get some rest."

"And what about Inosuke?" she then asks, referring to your brother.

"I'll check on him next," you promise. "I'll make sure both of you are alright."

"Okay," she smiles. "Can you stay with me tonight?"

"I don't think so," you shake your head apologetically. "I'm sorry."

"No, please, Y/N. You have to stay!" she shouts, grabbing tighter onto you.

"Let go! Stop being so loud. We're going to get in trouble!" you say.

"No we're not! No one is even out here," she says.

"Just let me go. I'll come back, I promise," you say, trying to remove her little hands but she continues to dig her nails into your arm so hard that you begin to bleed.

"Get off of me!" you yell.

"No!" she cries.

You sigh, "If you don't let me go, I won't come back!"

"I don't care!" she screams, letting you go and falling onto her bed.

Just then, you hear a rumbling noise grow closer and closer until the door flies open and Doma appears. He looks taller than he was before, taking up more space in the doorway than you remember. His multicolored eyes glow down at the two of you.

Instinctfully, you grab your sister tight just as Doma comes bounding closer, his face twisted and demonic. Your sister screams and Doma reaches for her. You try to shield her with your body, but you're thrown aside by his strength and land on the floor.

He grabs your sister by her ankles and drags her towards the door. She kicks and screams, begging for help, but he doesn't seem to care.

"Stop!" you shout as you stand back up. But before you can get close enough, he's holding her up in the air with one hand. You feel disoriented by the horrible sight before you. Your sister isn't just hanging upside down, her head is completely turned backwards and she is completely covered in her own blood.

"No!"

The Emptiness You Left

[ahgasegotarmy116]

DIFH JK ask: What about an instance in where JK is hurling insults at his son in front of his wife and oc because he messed up, resulting in him causing the other business not to sign with their company? Oc is hurt seeing how deflated her husband is and stands up for him, but JK isn't having it? Who he reminded her who is in charge, maybe punish her when they're alone again but reprimanding her in front of everyone also?

"I just got off the phone with our new client in Beijing. Well, I guess no longer our client because of your negligence" Jungkook throws out, reprimanding my husband for something that was completely out of his control.

"I told you, my flight got delayed and there weren't any others that I could get on that would get me there on time" my husband says, reiterating his defense.

"You should've contacted the company and told them instead of coming and whining to your father about missing the meeting after the fact" he say making him feel guilty.

"I was under the impression that I would be able to make it there, just a few hours late and be able to explain everything and smooth things over" he says, his voice getting a bit softer as he's coming around to seeing some of his mistakes. 

"Well you were wrong and now we've lost our most promising new client. Do you know how much of a hit our company's reputation is going to take?" He says standing up from his desk chair as a way to make my husband feel smaller.

"I thought that you would've passed the message on to your assistant and they would've informed them for me. Or at least that's how we've dealt with these situations in the past" he says bringing previous dealings up to see if there's some sort of argument he could use as a defense.

"Throwing the blame on someone else isn't going to get you anywhere" Jungkook says as I walk in, tired of overhearing their argument from down the hall, leaving Mrs. Jeon to look after the children.

"Haven't you had enough? He made a mistake but there are more clients out there that will work with you" I say, standing up for my husband who has started to look like a kicked puppy under his defensive exterior.

"This is none of your concern and you were not invited into this private conversation" Jungkook says not even bothering to humor me. "It is my concern when it involves you verbally abusing my husband" I say not backing down.

"It's okay honey I've got this" my husband says, standing up out of his chair and going to usher me out of the room.

"You know what? No. I'm not standing for this. You can't speak to him like that!" I argue, going up to Jungkook to prove that I'm not afraid of him. "Y/n leave. Now" he orders and with the look in his eyes I know that I'm tiptoeing very close to a line that I'm not too sure if I want to cross.

"Fine, but I'm packing up the kids now and we're leaving, all of us" I say turning away from him to face my husband. "That includes you" I say pointing my finger at him and he widens his eyes at me, not used to seeing this kind of behavior.

"Go pack up the children son, I'd like to have a word with her" Jungkook offers, not giving space for refusal. 

He looks at me with his eyes full of worry and I just nod my head to reassure him. "It's okay honey I'll be out in a minute" I say and he comes up to me and gives me a quick kiss before glaring daggers at his father, daring him to do something to me. If only he knew what kind of lines we've already crossed.

"Go" Jungkook says and my husband turns to go without another word, happy to get away from him but also hesitant to leave me alone.

"Why are you doing this to him?" I ask, turning around to face him now that my husband has left. "Because someone likes to piss me off and be all lovey dovey  in front of me" he say going back to sitting at his desk. 

"That's what this is about? Because you're jealous? Jungkook he's my husband" I say crossing my arms. "Please, your marriage is all a charade at this point" he scoffs. "Just because that's the way you see it doesn't mean that that's what it is. I love him and that's never going to change, no matter how much torture you put me through" I say and turn to go. 

"You're really going to regret saying that to me" he says, grabbing my wrist and pulling me back towards him. "Get off of me" I demand through gritted teeth, pushing him off and storming out.

Taglist: @jkslipppiercing @trina864 @kaitieskidmore97 @goddesofimortality @coolbluedude @00frenchfries00 @bangtans-momma @coralmusicblaze @pastelpinkjoon @joonwater @marvelbun @j3nni-rs @evidive @beomieboi @forevrglow. @jesssssmaybankk @teugiie @chaconnelatte @whoa-jo @snehal @xumyboo @mindurbuzznezz @diorh0seokie @hehurst23 @caro134340lina @ye0nvibezzn @olimpiiaa @hrtsj1m @junecat18 @ellesalazar @babycandy111 @felixz4life @lively-potter @esther-kpopstan @gyukookswhore @koohrs @skzthinker @vminkookgf @kookiescupcake0109 @itsyoooeui @latinapoetbts @iveivory

Join my Taglist!

Feel free to fill out the form or just comment on any of my fics to be added :)

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #128

So… I have good news and bad news!

I will start with the good news! J and I are not dead! We're not even slightly injured! Yay!

The bad news is that the plane is pretty ah… pretty banged up. It's not totaled or anything; it's definitely repairable and J has insurance for it, so it's really not the end of the world. I can't show you any pictures yet, because J asked me not to (something about legality and insurance???), but I have them. Maybe I'll post them up tomorrow.

As for what happened... to my inexperienced eyes, it looked like J was going in for a landing. We've done this like a million times before; it was going as per usual. Until it wasn't. For reasons I don't understand, the plane started veering to the left and leaving the runway, and J couldn't get it to stop doing that, also for reasons I don't understand.

A bunch of rapid-fire decisions were made in order to avoid colliding into buildings or into other vehicles. He tried to get the plane to go back into the sky, but it wouldn't go up; it remained on the ground. So then he aimed it towards open spaces. When it still wouldn't stop, he aimed for the treeline.

Fortunately, by the time we reached the trees, the plane had slowed down a decent amount, and the trees were young and still relatively bendy and forgiving. J also thought to get a special harness for the seatbelt to go over our shoulder and chest beforehand, and it was a really good call for him to have made; planes come equipped only with little lap belts, and if we had just stuck with that instead of getting the harness, we might have ended up being thrown forward and mashing our heads on the controls.

In the end, for us, it just felt like if you're in a car and you slam on the brakes suddenly. We were rocked and shaken, but not in any way injured. Because J saw to our safety ahead of time and was able to make good decisions even when the shit hit the fan, we lived. Stuff like this isn't normally something people get to walk away from unscathed.

It was an amazing combination of luck, prior planning, and skill on J's part that allowed us to remain unharmed. My faith in J and his ability to pilot a plane has not wavered. In fact, if anything, I trust him even more than I did before; now I am certain that if something unexpected happens, he can STILL keep us safe, because I just got done watching him do it, and the way he handled it was AMAZING. I couldn't be more proud of him!

A short while later, a bunch of police folks and some firefighters showed up, as well as some staff from the airport to make sure we were okay. It was a lot of people in our vicinity generally, and it was a lot to deal with, but I dealt with it on my own until J was able to emotionally recover enough deal with it; understandably, he was shaken far worse than I was. But we got it sorted out. Answered some questions. J filled out some insurance form. People gave us lots of kindness and reassurance along the way. The manager of the airport drove us to a nearby hotel. All things considered, everything is fine.

Of course, we're still very shaken. Both of us had a fuckton of adrenaline surge through our bodies. My hands are still shaking and my chest is tight and trembling as I write this. But we're okay, so don't worry. It's just adrenaline, and adrenaline can't hurt us by itself.

So... we're not home yet. We're at some other place because we thought it prudent to stop the plane to get gas. We're about 2 hours away from home by car. And what's more, we have to stay overnight here in order to deal with insurance stuff in the morning. Then I suppose we'll ask M or Br or both to come fetch us from here.

I don't know what tomorrow will bring, but whatever it is, I'm sure we'll figure it out. Even for big scary stuff like this, the solution, ultimately, is to just take things one step at a time.

On the bright side, I was able to snag you a bunch of really great pictures today! I love taking pictures of beautiful things for you, and I love showing you my world! Here, please enjoy these extra, because they were hard-won, and also because if things had turned out differently than they did, I might never have gotten a chance to share these with you, and that would have been sad, because I DID A GOOD JOB WITH THESE:

...I love my planet. I hope that if I show you enough pictures of it, maybe you could like it, too. I certainly love yours. And I love you, too, just in case you forgot. But I hope you don't forget, because part of the whole reason I write these letters is so that you can remember that you are loved by someone, somewhere, not for what you look like or for what you can do, but for who you are as a human being.

Oh, oh, oh!! And!! Today!! In the hangar before we left! J and the flight instructor practiced landing and flying and taking off for 2 or 3 hours before we headed home. So I chilled in the hangar with music by myself, and these two old men came in, and one of them spoke to me for some reason, which wasn't bad. But! I had my earphones in, so I had to ask him to pardon me and repeat himself.

Well, he was all like, "Yeah, get those things out of your ears!" in the same way that cranky old men generally like to do when people younger than them use technology. And you know? The version of me who existed prior to the letters I wrote to myself probably would have cowered and said, "I'm sorry sir."

BUT THAT'S NOT WHAT I DID TODAY!!! 🤩🤩🤩

Instead, I looked at him square in the face and said, "Excuse me, but I'm an adult human woman and you don't get to tell me what to do. Would you like to try again?" And!! Oh!! Sephiroth!!! I think he expected me to be all meek and submissive, because the shocked "Oh fuck!" look on his face was ABSOLUTELY!! PRICELESS!! And he spluttered for a bit before finally introducing himself properly! I was really glad that he tried again. But I think he was a bit too embarrassed about how rude he was before to interact with me much further than that; I'm not too sad about that, though.

...I wonder if you'd be proud of me. I mean... if you could read any of this, and if you've been able to read any of the stuff I've written so far. I wonder if you could see how much I've been learning and growing and trying to get out from under the oppressive thumb of the memories I carry. I wonder if you'd be proud. And I wonder if you'd use my growth as inspiration for your own.

I'm pretty tired, so I think I'm going to stop writing now.

I love you. And I'll write again tomorrow. Please stay safe.

Your friend, Lumine

[popchoc]

Maya & Carina - 🏕️ 🤕🌷 please

Maya & Carina, ⛺️ 🌷 🤕

Maya is strong. Strong enough to carry someone for quite some distance. But she's also realistic. She knows that carrying Carina would slow her down, a lot, and that they'd never make it back before nightfall. They'd might get halfway, but that would be anything but an advantage.

Their last hour of daylight is way too precious.

"You can make it though," Carina suggests, while biting through the pain. She leans forward to re-adjust the improvised brace around her ankle, careful to avoid the broken bone. They lost a lot of time after her fall, needing to take care of her injury first, but Carina is convinced that Maya can still finish the last part of the trek, especially if she'd take a run for it. "You can reach the parking lot before dark and get help. Or maybe your phone picks up a signal before that?"

Maya shakes her head. "No way," she tells her, a serious and determined look on her face. "I'm not leaving you here. Never."

"But Maya—"

"Carina, no! If we split up and something happens to me as well, we don't stand a chance. Besides, we don't need that risk. We can make it through the night, and then take our time first thing in the morning." Maya takes Carina's hand in her own, giving it an encouraging squeeze. "We'll be okay. Alright?"

Carina just nods. She knows Maya feels responsible. Even guilty maybe. She took Carina out here. Persuaded her it would be a great hike, now that winter was finally over, making the Washington woods accessible again. Accessible and beautiful, with spring breaking through in every possible way.

Not wanting to waste any more time, Maya jumps up.

"We need shelter first. I'll try to build us some kind of tent," she says, already scanning her surroundings. "I can make a fire, too. I think we've got some water left, and we can do one night without food."

"Look at you," Carina grins through gritted teeth, as another wave of pain hits her, "Watching that Bull guy all the time finally pays off."

Not understanding, Maya furrows her brow, but then a sudden snort escapes her - despite their unfortunate situation.

"You mean Bear," she chuckles, remembering the moment when Carina finally agreed to watch the show with her, only to take off in disgust within a few minutes, when Bear Grylls was about to drink his own pee. "And like him or not, but he does know survival. I'm sure you'll send him a thank you note as soon as we're out of here!"

By now, Maya has wandered off a little, still searching around for anything useful. Spring might indeed come with some lovely flowers, but it also means a surplus of buds and fresh, young and most of all tiny leaves. Now why couldn't they have been stranded on some tropical beach, surrounded by giant palm trees?

"This isn't gonna work, is it?" Carina asks, her already existing worry fueled by the now thoughtful expression on Maya's face. Maya turns back to her, alarmed by the tone in Carina's voice.

"Of course it is!" She isn't sure who she's trying to reassure the most, but she has to believe that things will work out. That she can do this. "I- I'm not completely sure how yet. But I'll figure it out. I promise," she goes on, quickly speeding back to her wife. "Hey, look at me. I promise, okay? I know I've been… absent. But I'm here now. And I'm getting us through this. I'll get you through this night."

When she takes Carina in her arms, cautious so she doesn't hurt her even more, Carina looks up at her.

"By building us a roof out of daisies?"

"If I have to," Maya quietly nods, before pressing a kiss to her temple. "I mean, how many would it really take? A thousand? Two maybe?!"

Carina narrows her eyes. "And if that doesn't work?"

"Then I'll cover you," Maya shrugs. "I know it's not much, compared to a roof of daisies, or a bed of roses, or a freaking sheet of tulips, but if it's enough for you—"

"It is," Carina cuts her off. "See, this Bear of yours might be the expert here, and he might very well be right about needing shelter first. But he doesn't have what I have."

Now Maya is the one to frown. "Which is?"

"You, silly!" Carina laughs. "I've got you. And you, my love, are - and will always be - more than enough."

****************************************************

Mix & Match Writing Prompts 

[krys-loves-otome]

Different Universe, Same Love: Magic AU

"Oi! Broer! Hondje! We need to reach town before sunset! Hurry it up back there!"

"Okay, Theo!" Vincent called back, holding out his hand to the little healer mage, Abby, at his side, helping her step over a low branch that would have tripped her.

"We've still got plenty of daylight left," he reassured Abby, "Theo's just worried about us using up too much of our energy from the fighting earlier."

"How are you holding up? You used a lot of mana in that last fight against the manticore."

"I-I'm okay." she said, "I still have one more potion left in my bag so that should hold until we reach town."

"Are you sure? You look a little pale and your hand feels very warm."

"Mhmm!" She nodded with a smile.

Vincent still tightened his grip on her hand, keeping to her pace.

"This path is so beautiful…" she said absentmindedly, admiring the colorful flowers.

"Yeah," Vincent said, "if we weren't in a rush, I would have liked to paint them."

Vincent glanced ahead, seeing Theo talking to Arthur. Or bickering, with the way Theo was scowling and the eternally mischievous grin on Arthurs's face.

"But, we do need to conserve our strength and resources. Perhaps I can ask Theo if we can stay in town for a few days, so I can paint the flowers with you, if you'd like."

"Really? I would-!" She fell forward, Vincent's surprisingly strong arms for his class, catching her before she hit the ground.

"Careful!" Vincent helped her to stand upright, brushing her bangs out of her face, his hand lingering on her forehead.

"…Theo, Arthur!" He called, taking Abby's staff out of her hands. "Take our staves. Abby isn't feeling well."

"V-Vincent, I can-"

"No way, Hondje." Theo took her staff, noting her flushed cheeks. "You pass out and we're all in trouble."

"You sure you don't want one of us to carry her, mate?" Arthur offered, "Magic users aren't exactly known for having great strength-"

His words vanished on his tongue as Vincent easily into his arms with a tiny squeak from the little bird. Theo smirked.

"He might be an elemental mage, but Broer has strength to match any brawler or sword-wielder. And beat them."

"Bloody hell," Arthur whispered, staring in disbelief. "Guess… there are exceptions."

"Naturally." Theo said proudly , then turned back to Vincent. "Do you want to rest here?"

"How far off is the town?"

"We can make it there in less than an hour, if we move fast."

Vincent nodded.

"Keep an eye out for fever reducing plants, both of you. Maybe even a restoring fountain if we're lucky."

They also nodded and turned to move on ahead.

"Vincent, I… I'm so sorry…"

"Rest, schatje." Vincent said, readjusting his grip for speed and followed Theo and Arthur at a brisk pace. "We'll find an inn to recover in once we get to town. You'll be good as new then."

Abby laid her head on his shoulder, closing her eyes.

----

Another entry down! Only one more to go!

I know the prompt said circus/magic au, but I couldn't think of much for the circus theme, so I just went with my first thought at seeing magic, which was a sort of OG Final Fantasy kinda setting.

Many thanks again to Mo (@xxsycamore) and Julie (@queengiuliettafirstlady) for hosting this event once again!

Also, Happy World Watercolor Month, I'm gonna try to do most of my July artworks in watercolors (with help as needed with pencils and digital effects that I couldn't replicate in analog).

[thessalian]

Faerun!Alisaie vs This Underdark Bullshit

After a somewhat mad party and some reassurances for Lae'zel that "we will get there, I promise"...

Gale: And even though we've cleared a side path, now we're taking the front door. Now when they all know to hate us.

Alisaie: Do you really think this is going to be that hard?

Gale: ...Probably not, no, but there'll be more further in and saving energy feels like a thing--

Alisaie: They are leaderless goblins and bugbears.

Wyll: And one ogre.

Alisaie: Okay, yes, and one ogre. We can deal with this. We have taken shits scarier than them!

Gale: ...Collectively, or--?

Shadowheart: Stop bringing nit-pick logic into her motivational speech.

Some fairly easy hacking through goblins and bugbears (and two humans and an ogre) later, in the Shattered Sanctum

Gale: What are you doing?!? The spiders are in there!

Alisaie: I got this. *chugs a Potion of Speaks With Animals*

Spider: Yum!

Alisaie: There are goblins out there and they're way yummier than us. Go eat them.

Spider: Okay!

Wyll: I can't decide if that's briliant or brutal.

Alisaie: Eh, I gave them corpses to chew on and they'll live in the ruins lest anyone decide to try moving back in--

Goblins: *screaming in the distance*

Spiders: Yay! Live prey! Finally some enrichment!

Alisaie: *snorts laughter*

Wyll: ...What? What did it say?

Alisaie: They were bored. They are no longer bored. But I don't really want them to die so... *shoots an arrow at the goblin being eaten by spider*

Goblin: *dies*

Spider: Thanks. Matriarch said I shouldn't play with my food.

Alisaie: *heads for Priestess Gut's chambers, laughing her ass off*

Wyll: What? What?!? What did it say?!?

Gale: Maybe we should all gargle those concoctions of hers. I think we miss some of the best jokes.

Alisaie: Oh, that reminds me; I should ask if Halsin found a mate for Tusk. Or was a mate for Tusk, whatever; I don't judge with druids.

Gale; Wyll; Shadowheart: Excuse you?!?

Alisaie: Later! I promise! I-- *walks into Priestess Gut's chambers; runs into ogre handmaiden/bodyguard* Oh. Hi there.

Ogre Handmaiden/Bodyguard: *looks unimpressed*

Alisaie: Hey, it's cool; we're just passing through. You won't even know we're here.

Ogre Handmaiden/Bodyguard: *grunts assent*

Gale: You could sell firelighting kits in hell, you know that?

Alisaie: Probably, but speaking of hell, let's get the hell out of here before she wises up and figures out I killed her boss yesterday.

Shadowheart: Well, much as I'm not entirely keen on performing rites to Selune, I suppose beating Her worshippers' little floor puzzle would be worth doing...

Alisaie: Or we can doubly flag up how ridiculous they were with their entrance-hiding and use the proverbial key they left under the metaphorical pot of begonias.

Shadowheart: What?

Alisaie: *disengages lock on Emergency 'We-Locked-Ourselves-Out' Lever; pulls lever*

Door to Underdark: *opens*

Shadowheart: ...Or we could do it that way too, I suppose.

Alisaie: Tell you what; I will totally do the next bit of ritual bullshit. Just for you. Okay?

Shadowheart: *only half-joking* You're so good to me.

[letscrywolff]

Make Believe

I fantasize about you still.

A version of you that could never be. A version of you that you couldn't give to me.

One where you're the one saying the hottest things to me, like...

"Baby, I love you, but I'm just not ready for such a big step so soon. I really do want all those things with you, I don't doubt that at all.

I'm just scared.

Maybe I've been too soft, too subtle, I know you've tried to reassure me when I've brought things up, but I want to be clear with you now, direct. I need more time.

This is something that only time can solve. I know we said that before, but I understand that passion between us gave mixed messages. I know that's why you kept going with the plan that we've hashed out together. I gave in too, so don't feel like it's all your fault. I love how things feel between us, and I think we'll always have that, I just want to make sure it's not just the honeymoon phase talking. I want to make sure we're doing this for the right reasons. I want us to work, and I want to do this right.

I know I told you I was ready, but as we got closer, I realized I still have fears I'm working through. I've felt myself wanting to run, and I'm fighting that now. This is hard for me, but it isn't your fault. But I do need you to understand that, and I need you to slow down with me, not because I don't want this, but because I do.

I know I asked you for two weeks at my new place before you moved in. I didn't think about it at the time how that might come off to you after all the times I've left you. I thought I was just communicating my needs, but I didn't take yours into account. I know you worry I'll leave you, or that you'll lose me. I'm sorry that you have to think like that at all - I know I'm the reason why, and I don't blame you. So I don't blame you for being wary and needing reassurance. This is my attempt to give you that.

If you're patient with me, I know we can work through this, because I know I love you, and I know I want this with you, I'm just scared about a lot of 'what-ifs' from my past - and I don't mean to hold their failings against you, but I don't want to live through that kind of pain ever again. I can't afford to rush, only to be left with heartbreak again.

I want this with you, B. I love you. I just want to make sure that we're sure. I still want to see you, I just need more time, and I hope you'll understand."

This is what my fantasies about you got reduced down to. Just wanting the basic, bare-minimums of a good-faith and honest relationship. Sad that this was asking too much of you.

This sort of thing was even my fantasy before we ever reconnected - some emotional maturity. Some emotional honesty. Some accountability, self-awareness. Some willingness to try.

Something that honored our connection and fought for it, instead of severing it for no good reason.

I had thought maybe you grew up some and got to that point. It felt like we were being so honest with one another. God how I wish I could have ever gotten a message like that instead of jumping straight to the nuclear option.

Instead, the reality of you is someone who acted impulsively, avoided communication, and failed to grow emotionally. You expected a mind reader without having to let them know what’s on your mind first.

But expecting decency from you truly is the stuff of make believe. You just don't have it in you. Maybe one day someone else will be lucky enough to get that version of you. I'm sure then it will be what you want. I'm sure then it will work. I'm sure then that it'll feel right, and you won't feel so pushed. And I wonder if then you'll realize that all could have been true with us too if only you had shown up the same way.

[lesboylycan]

we're still... angry. about how long it took for us to figure out we had avpd. not just questioning, going back and forth--really settling in it. (long vent below)

we said at first that it was just because we had our SP. but i think it's more than that. we've talked a little bit about how our SP (at the time, also our partner system) made our avpd worse, even if unintentionally--how we'd say things like "we feel like you're the only ones we can be good for, the only ones we feel like we can maintain a healthy relationship with", and the only 'reassurance' we got from them was "haha, yeah, it'll just be us till the end of time--we're only good for you and you're only good for us :)!"

maybe that was just how they felt. maybe they just felt similarly to how we did. but the implicit confirmation that they were the only ones who we could be good enough for... at the time, we didn't recognize it as negative. because they were our SP--because of course, yeah, we're a monster and terrible, it is only through their grace and kindness that we're still with them. because they were just repeating the truth we'd stated, it felt natural. and there was the assumption that they'd stay.

until they didn't.

they questioned having avpd--i don't know if they still are, if they've confirmed it for themselves or if they've confirmed against it for themselves. we're not going to say whether or not they did--just that, if they did, it was very different from how we presented. to bring in some schizoid ideas (since we'd believed ourselves to have szpd for a long time, so that's what we're used to), we were a "low functioning" avoidant. no close friends, hadn't stayed at anyone else's house except for a single (who we now recognize as) SP's since 6th grade, not even any contact with in-person "friends" outside of school save for SP and two others in high school, hell--we decided against going into drama/theater because we were "too dramatic" at the informational meeting (which happened prior to auditions) in middle school. we're extremely avoidant, and we have been for a long time. they, meanwhile, had multiple friends who they'd regularly stay over with, they went out to public events, almost every single discord server we joined was first joined by them, etc etc.

again, none of this is to say that they absolutely don't have avpd. we truly do not know, and we don't want to assume from our current outside perspective. simply to say that they said they believed they had avpd, and we believed them--and our brain, hating the idea of copying them (funnily enough, because of avpd, since we feel like there's a fear of being hurt or ridiculed if we copy someone), looked at avpd and crossed it off the list. not just because we were scared of copying them, even, but because we were so different from them--the brain assumed that they were the real avoidant, because they expressed their longing for relationships. that we must be schizoid, because we stayed holed up in our house and never tried. flawed thought process though it may be, it's the one we went through.

and then they left. first, there was the "big loss"--when they not just exited our romantic relationship, but also left us alone during a time where we were extremely vulnerable (schizophrenia is worst for us in December, SAD is worst for us in December, and we have a superstition/paranoid belief/whatever you want to call it that every December, something awful and at least minorly life changing in a negative fashion will happen--and this moment was right when we'd begun to accept that them leaving wouldn't be the awful terrible thing that happened as per all of their promises), knowing we had no support network outside of them. and for the first three days, we were completely alone! after that, we broke--in the private server we had with them, we had channels that were supposed to be muted by the other person so we could vent without the other person seeing unless we specifically @'ed them, although we knew they didn't actually have ours muted even though we had theirs muted. and we talked about how badly we were struggling--without @'ing them, hoping they wouldn't see it.

and they did. and they talked to us, saying they hadn't meant to hurt us. and there was an argument in part because we, completely drained from being alone when we were at our most vulnerable, misinterpreted some of what they said--but also in part because they never explained some extremely important details, which ended up making us seem like assholes simply because we weren't a mind reader. and they told us that we could send messages if we wanted, but they may not respond.

were they entitled to their space? absolutely! we're not going to deny that. but at the same time, our trust was still broken. because they admitted losing feelings for us in November, but waiting because they didn't want to tell us. knowing all of our difficulties with December. and they were no longer our SP.

that wasn't what made us figure out our avpd. it took another eight months for us to figure it out. for a time, we believed we had szpd with bpd [traits] and that they were our FP--in reality, they were still our only friend (because they'd said they'd wanted to stay friends), and we were rocketing back and forth between "we would do anything for them to love us and want us again like they'd promised they would" and "we need to get out, we can't handle this amount of anguish, we can't handle being around them". we misinterpreted it as splitting because that's what it looked like, because we still couldn't recognize that we had avpd, because they were still the people who'd (implicitly) told us that we were right in thinking that they were the only ones we could be healthy with.

and then there was the little loss: we finally ended the friendship. (or, rather, Twitch, who'd hated them from the beginning thanks to being split off specifically to be as detached as possible from them and to be hostile to help in detaching, ended the friendship.) and within days of us no longer talking to them, we looked back at the avpd tags on a whim and--oh.

we hit every single symptom of avpd. and we didn't recognize it even when we believed ourselves to truly be an unlovable, rotten monster whom only one person could ever be around safely, who was so uniquely inept and ill-equipped for existence among others in any quasi-intimate capacity that it should never see the light of day. and we didn't recognize it because when we expressed all of that, our SP agreed.

[legends-of-time]

The Journey of Living at Downton

Chapter 39: September 1924

Masterlist

George has turned three and like with Sybbie's fourth birthday last month, there were happy celebrations for the child and then a few quiet moments of reflection for the one they had lost that day.

Rosamund has also suddenly arrived to visit and will be staying a week and will be there for their cocktail party for Robert's Lieutenant people thing later in the week. Emma misses her arrival as she is pulling in a shift at the Hospital. She doesn't mind Robert's sister really; she's always been polite to Emma and has warmed up to her over the years but Emma can see where Mary got her aloofness from.

Emma and Miss Baxter have also both been putting in a joint effort for Thomas to open up to them to no avail.

Emma is lying in bed next to Tom, slowly drifting off to sleep when Tom suddenly says, "Emma? Are you awake?"

Emma groans softly and opens her eyes to find her husband still sitting up in bed like he had been when he was reading. "Hmmm... what is it?"

"Lord Grantham, Robert, he said something earlier that's got me thinking." Tom tells her.

This wakes up Emma and she pulls herself up so she's leaning on her elbow. "Oh?"

"He was saying how I, we, should be proud of what we've accomplished. Learnt both sides of the argument. Said I shouldn't make nothing of what we've achieved."

Emma can see how deep in thought her husband is, so she pulls herself so she's sitting up in bed and lays her head on his shoulder. "I suppose he's right. We are in a more privileged position than where we were four years ago. What's brought all this on?"

"Sarah Bunting has reminded me of who you and me once were, believing in reform, the moral direction of the Left." Tom admits.

Emma hasn't been pleased with Sarah's method of badgering Robert, but she has to agree with Tom. Has both of them become lacklustre in their beliefs while staying at Downton?

"We can be that again." She tries to reassure him.

"But can we be that at Downton?"

Emma frowns. "Not sure. Maybe we'll only be able to find out if we leave. Help us work out where home is."

——

Emma slips down the stairs into the servant's area. She's dressed in her work outfit and will be heading off soon, but she had to do this first.

She watches as Anna, Mr Carson, Mr Bates, and Mrs Hughes come walking out of the Servants' Hall before she pokes her head inside and sees that Thomas is sitting on his at the table now. He's looking even more ill at this point than in the previous episode, and completely devoid of energy.

"Thomas..." she says hesitantly as she walks inside.

"Emma," he weakly pulls himself up, "do what do I owe the pleasure?"

"You know why I am here." Emma says. He sighs irritably. "Thomas, please talk to me you're not well."

"I do not know what you mean. I'm fine." Thomas retorts but it lacks his usual fire.

"You are not fine!" Emma exclaims. "Miss Baxter says—"

Thomas scoffs. "She's been too nosey for her own good."

"She cares about you; I care about you. We're worried." Emma says, pleadingly. She walks around the table to touch him, but he steps back from her.

"I am perfectly well." He speaks.

"But Thomas—"

"But nothing, I'm fine." he declares firmly before leaving the room. Emma stares after him despondently.

——

The rest of Emma's day runs smoothly except for when Violet suddenly appears wanting to visit Dr Clarkson. She's invited him to a lunch on Thursday Clarkson tells Emma later, an implication that she wants to push Isobel to Dr Clarkson instead of Lord Merton.

Sergeant Willis and Inspector Vyner arrive to interview Mary as well as Anna. Emma hears when she returns, she naturally panics. Mary tries to reassure her by saying that there was no mention of Emma at all, but she doesn't find that reassuring. She worries they're narrowing in on Mr Bates.

Billy tells her that Sarah Bunting has had an offer from a school in Preston, Lancashire that she has accepted. Despite how much he's trying to hide it, Emma can see he's sad about it. Particularly as apparently, she's leaving tomorrow for good.

——

For dinner that evening, everyone gets shuffled about as Rosamund is staying. Emma finds herself in between Isobel and Mary.

"Have any of you heard of someone called Atticus Aldridge?" Rose asks.

"He sounds like the hero of a novel by Mrs Humphrey Ward." Rosamund remarks.

"I'm not sure. Any more clues?" Cora replies.

Emma listens to the conversation, but her gaze is fixed on Thomas, who looks ready to collapse.

"I met him today. In York. Marsha George told me his father's been made Lord Sinderby." Rose explains.

"Now, wait a minute. I remember this." Robert realises. "When the title was created, the locals were furious, but now I can't remember why. Perhaps it's because Sinderby's a Yorkshire Village and they'd only just bought some house."

"Canningford Grange."

"Oh!" Violet exclaims in surprise. "Have the Wheelers sold up?"

"You knew that. I told you." Robert tells her. He turns to Rose. "What does My Lord Sinderby do?"

"Oh, I think he's a banker. I don't know, really, but the son's nice." Rose answers. Mary gives her a very pointed look and shares a grin with Cora. Rose laughs. "Oh... nothing like that!"

Emma frowns as she watches Thomas who is walking around the table with the decanter. He stops behind Cora and Tom as if he needs to test where next to put his feet in order not to fall down.

Violet sees it. "Barrow, are you quite well? Carson, have you been over-working him?"

"Not that I'm aware, Your Ladyship." The butler replies. "Mr Barrow, am I ill-treating you?"

Thomas grinds out the biggest lie he has probably ever told in his life. "You are the soul of kindness, Mr Carson."

"Thank you, Mr Barrow."

"I'm looking forward to your party." Isobel remarks to Robert.

"It's very daring of the Lord Lieutenant to give a cocktail party." Mary says. "Carson, what do you think?" Mr Carson pulls a disgruntled face.

"Well, I agree with Carson. It seems very fast to me." Violet says.

"I love cocktail parties." Rose argues.

"I agree." Emma adds, deciding to join in before anyone asks if she's alright. "Seems easier. More casual."

"Exactly." Cora agrees. "You only have to stay forty minutes, instead of sitting for seven courses between a deaf landowner and an even deafer Major General." Everyone chuckles.

"Even so, they'll say you're not doing things 'properly' anymore." Rosamund says to her brother.

"Do you care what people think?" Edith asks her father, looking very irritant.

"Yes. I accept change, but I want to navigate it gently. I don't want to leap into it and put everyone's backs up." Comes Robert's diplomatic reply.

"But why do the rituals, the clothes and the customs, matter so much?" Tom questions. He glances at Emma, who gives him an encouraging grin, happy to see him voicing his views.

"Because, without them, we would be like the Wild Men of Borneo." Violet retorts.

"I disagree." Isobel counters. "Manners and tradition are all very well, but once they start to control us, they've outlived their usefulness."

"Well, there are far more important things to worry about than whether or not Carson minds serving cocktails." Edith remarks unkindly.

"Why is Carson in the line of fire? What's he done wrong?" Billy questions. Mr Carson looks surprised at Billy standing up for him.

"I'm sorry. Excuse me, Mama. I've rather a headache." Edith rises. The men rise with her, and she walks out.

"What was that about?" Emma wonders.

"Rosamund, you spent the afternoon together. Did Edith mention anything was bothering her?" Cora asks.

"Oh, she's just very tired. She'll be fit as a flea tomorrow." Rosamund calmly replies.

Everyone seems to accept her response and continue eating. Emma frowns at Rosamund suspiciously.

——

Mary heads off to London the next day to dine with Mr Blake. Emma had raised an eyebrow at that, but Mary had insisted it wasn't like that.

Robert is going to his dinner in Sheffield for all the Yorkshire based commanding officers or something. Since Emma is working a day shift today, she has to say goodbye to him the night before.

Mr Bricker will be turning up again as well, wanting to see more of Downton's Della Francesca to write in his book, apparently.

During the day, Emma is once again left in charge of the Hospital as Violet has dragged Dr Clarkson to her luncheon in some convoluted way of trying to get Isobel away from Lord Merton. He soon returns and Emma takes this as her chance to take a break. She's walking through the Village when she spots who she is looking for.

Sarah Bunting is emerging from a building just ahead as a taxi pulls up. Emma picks up her pace and walks over to them as the driver begins to load her luggage.

"Sarah!" Emma calls.

Sarah turns and looks at her in surprise. "Emma. I didn't expect to see you."

Emma gives her a self-deprecating smile. "I just wanted to say goodbye and good luck. I know we haven't always gotten along but I do wish you the best."

Sarah smiles softly. "Thank you. I hope you and Mr Branson keep fighting for what you believe in. I really do."

"We won't." Emma promises.

Sarah opens her mouth to say something but freezes at the sight of something over Emma's shoulder. Emma turns to see Billy, dressed for work and looking frazzled, running up to them.

"You nearly missed me." Sarah remarks softly to him.

"I'll take my leave," Emma says, giving Billy's upper arm a squeeze before moving on.

——

After the dinner, the ladies are assembled in the Drawing room when Tom, Billy and Mr Bricker come in.

Emma breaks from Edith and Rose to walk over to Billy and Tom, Mr Bricker strides past with a brief glance in her direction. "You two didn't linger long."

Billy shrugs. "We didn't really know what to say to him."

"He was also eager to join the rest of the group." Tom adds.

"Probably one person in particular." Emma glances over her shoulder to where Mr Bricker has joined Cora and Violet by the fireplace. Violet gives a disapproving look and then walks away to join Edith, who is sitting with Rosamund.

"Should we do something?" Billy questions.

"Like what?" Tom asks.

"Not sure. I just know that there'll be an explosion before too long."

"Maybe they need it." The two men give her a questioning look. "It's no secret that Robert takes her for granted, maybe this'll wake him up."

Violet, Rosamund, and Edith walk out as Isobel and Rose walk up to them.

Isobel turns to Billy. "How is your fiery friend, Miss Bunting? I notice we don't see her here as much as we used to."

"Do you wonder at it?" Billy remarks.

"Well, it's good to be disagreed with. Keeps you on your toes."

"Then Lord Grantham must have been on points from the moment she walked through the door." He's trying but failing to make light of it.

"I hope you haven't broken with her."

Emma explains. She gives Billy a pitiful look. "She's gone. She left today."

"Oh, I am sorry." Isobel says sympathetically. "What about you, Rose? What happened to the young man you met?"

"He's gone, too." Rose says with a little laugh. "He's starting a new job in London."

"Well, this is a sad conversation." Emma remarks.

"He was interesting. He wasn't just the same old chap one's supposed to dance with. His family was unusual." Rose says.

"In what way?" Tom asks.

"They came here from Odessa, sixty years ago. They were driven out by the pogroms, but they've done well." Rose explains.

Ah.

"Well, yes, that is interesting." Isobel says.

——

Emma is surprised to find that when she returns from her shift at the Hospital the next day, Mr Bricker has left. Tom says it was sudden and without any ceremony that he barely noticed the art dealer was gone for most of the day.

Emma is also surprised to learn that Robert had suddenly arrived later last night from his lieutenant thing in Sheffield instead of staying over. She doesn't think much of it really but then she notices how they behave as they greet the guests at the Lord Lieutenant cocktail party that evening.

The couple would greet a guest and when they moved on, Cora would lean over and make a comment to her husband, but instead of reciprocating, Robert would simply turn his head and ignore her. Mary, who has also noticed, from where she stands with Rosamund shares a look of concern with Emma who stands with Tom and Rose.

——

A/N: Please leave comments on how you're enjoying this story and what you think.

[filmbyjy]

We've decided to directly address the public about our relationship and I don't know how to go about me also being an internet personality as a VTUBER 😭😭😭

She watches the sky pass them by, locked in his embrace, and spots the sun beginning to set. The bright yellow and orange merging into the oncoming dark blue makes for a perfect sight. Wordlessly, she pulls her phone out, single handedly, and captures the image. As she reviews the photo of the setting sun, she takes a moment to deliberate. "I think...I want us to actually go public," she gently announces, "We've left your fans and the internet speculating enough."

He looks over to her, curious, when she suddenly pulls out her phone and says she wants to take a picture, before his eyebrow raises at her actual words. "You mean... you want to finally confirm it, publicly? Like... that we're a couple, and everything?" He asks, softly, wanting to make sure he heard her right.

"Maybe leave out Angel and Damien, for now," she adds, looking back at him, "They're still only babies but yes." They've had two soft launches already-the first shortly after they first got together on her private instagram and the second when they danced together during the Random Dance Challenge on Cai's birthday just two months ago. She still wonders how those videos have yet to see the light of Social Media day. Now, she's ready to walk hand-in-hand with him proudly. No more hiding, no more disguises.

He chuckles "That's fine by me," He adds, with a small little smile, before he asks "And, like... how do you want it to come out?" He continues. He knows she's probably got it all planned out already, but he wants to hear it from her mouth just to be sure.

"...Would your company throw a fit if I post it publicly on instgram as myself and interview you on stream later tonight?" She suggests, ending in soft laugh, "It may be weird but I still want to separate myself from Yvette and ask you questions about us...even if it means I, as myself, may only seem to be going out with you for clout." She doesn't want to reveal her true identity to the viewers of her stream. She never planned to really. That was the whole point of starting her VTUBER career as Yvette.

"I mean... I think that would be fine," He reassures her, "And- I think it's really cute that you want to do that. I mean... if you want to, I have no complaints." He smiles softly, leaning a little bit more into her- this was really cute to him, and he was happy that she wanted to do this with him.

"I do," she confirms, leaning her forehead against his as she closes her eyes to savour this one last private moment out between them. After today, she suspects they won't have another moment like this.

"So, will you be interviewing me as yourself, then?" He asks, with a small smile on his face- he seems to be enjoying their little moment too, the two of them alone together like this. He's just enjoying spending the moment with her, and he can't wait to spend even more moments with her- moments like this, and moments like the ones they just had, and the many more to come.

"No, I'll be asking as Yvette," she reaffirms before thinking better of it, "Or is that a bit complicated?"

He gives a little laugh, "It might be, yeah," He admits, "But I won't stop you if you wanna go ahead with it- I think I'd be happy no matter what." He says, with a smile, before he leans in, just a little bit, giving her a sweet little kiss on the lips. "I'll do whatever will make you happiest- we'll do whatever will make the both of us happiest." He leans back again. "So, if you wanna go for it- we can do it."

"We could draft up a script-more like dot points," she suggests, "Or Yvette could be a character in later chapters of Enhypen's Webtoon Dark Moon: The Blood Altar, what do you think?"

He chuckles again "I think both could work," he replies, thinking about both those things- she always seems to be thinking of the coolest ideas, and of the ways to improve them- she's always got the best ideas, and he adores her for it. "What do you think would work better?" He asks, his smile soft again, as he leans in for another small, sweet little kiss.

I brought this upon myself 🥲

~🧛🏻‍♂️🐕

AWWW THATS SO CUTE🥹

[gwiazdowe]

@mayxthexforce:

She'd spent more hours than she could count now dodging so many blaster bolts and yet, that last sniffle left her feeling like it would do her in. Like a lightsaber's right through her hearts. "I think you're right." Drakka nodded. "It must be guiding you, given that of all the crates in the planet you could have ended up hiding inside of, it's one of mine." That had to be more than luck. It had to be fate. But even fate felt like luck now. Every ounce of oxygen filling her lungs felt like luck, every beat of her hearts like a gift– a gift that so many other Jedi had been denied and yet she —who had never been the most obedient Jedi— continued to be granted. It must have really been in the force's plans for her to find this child. It was the only way she could make sense of this. It was also a way to give herself purpose among all the chaos and pessimism. Keeping a gentle hand on the boy's shoulder, Drakka guided him out of the cargo hold. She let all that needed to be done repeat in her mind: get him something else to wear, get him food, make sure he got some rest– she still had to tell Macter. So, the cockpit was their first stop. He sat on the pilot seat, checking the news on a holopad and being quick to put it away when he heard her come in– not wanting to bombard her with any more grief. Macter turned on the seat, mouth open, whatever he was about to say died in his throat as his eyes went from Drakka down to Cirz. Drakka saw a mix of emotions go through his face, felt them in the force: confusion, realization, refusal, frustration and finally, resignation. "This is Cirz," she said, not wanting to give time for that last emotion to turn into anything that would result in an argument about transporting ANOTHER Jedi. "He figured out one of your locks." Macter's brows furrowed. Then, he sighed. "I do always use the same code- welcome aboard, kid. Please, no Jedi tricks in the ship. We're trying to not get caught." he turned back to face the control panel. Drakka smiled down at Cirz. "He's an acquired taste, but he's not a bad man," she told Cirz, leading him out of the cockpit. "Now, how about you check the cabinets for something to eat while I see if we've got anything that might fit you? Eat whatever you want."

It feels like only yesterday Cirz was a single step from losing his life, unsure where to go, unable to rest — Now with the warm hand on his shoulder, with another Jedi, another force signature so close, it truly seems like he’s been blessed. The Force can be so kind at the strangest times. He nods to himself – or to Drakka – or maybe really to both. Right now he would agree to go anywhere if only to keep this comfort longer.

Surely Master Enah would scold him for his guard becoming nonexistent, but the fatigued young mind decides it is fine. What really matters is that they are flying, and Drakka’s cloak is making him comfortable, and Drakka’s hand is on his shoulder, and perhaps it all can be fine now.

The cargo room left behind. The finer details of the ship’s layout gradually become lost on the young padawan, or otherwise he would notice that he has passed the freshers without stopping, or that Drakka has led him all the way to the cockpit.

Perhaps he would even sense that they are not the only beings on board (he tells himself that he should). But he doesn’t. Not until he is facing the human man in the pilot seat, and despite the reassuring hand still resting on his shoulder, Cirz finds his body tensing up at this meeting. (The face this man is making doesn’t help)

“I’m Cirz.” He repeats after Drakka, making an effort to straighten his back, like one might in front of the Council to present himself well. He offers a small bow in greeting, grasping the oversized cloak that starts to slide off him. 

“Um. We have much in common Sir, I’m also trying to not be caught; Promise!”

To his large relief he is not thrown out, (neither sold, neither shot on sight). They walk out like they walked in and it takes a second to really sink. He can stay here. He smiles back at Drakka with a wide yellow smile — and at the idea of food just as much.

The dark tired eyes regain something of their former spark, if only for this moment. “I will get us lunch Master, I will do that!” 

Just leave it to one hungry padawan to find the kitchenette in a flash.

Any other day Cirz would be more mannered about prying the cabinets open, but he isn’t now, leaving one after another open to check their contents. The first cabinet holds only cleaning utensils, the next one a trash bin, but in the third one is a box of salted nut bars that he begins to devour entirely too fast. The dry treat sticks to his throat, leaving him coughing and scrambling to the sink to wash it down with tap water. Then he follows it up with some kind of pink-striped fruit that he spots in the basket on the counter. He winces at how sour it is. Juice drips down his chin and he wipes it quickly with the sleeve of his tunic.

One big breath. This is already the best thing he’s had in a while (how many days was it?) but he opens the fourth cabinet. He has to stand on his toes to reach, but it is worth the effort. He recognizes the instant-heating meal packages favoured by spacers for how effortless they are.

Spacers. Clone soldiers.

Cirz’s lips press together. He stands there for a moment, staring up at the inside of the cabinet..

He eventually glances over his shoulder towards where Drakka left, and around.He’s alone.

Technically he just got told he shouldn’t use… 'jedi tricks', but for the food… — He thinks to himself — no one is here to see him give those packages a little handy push.

[missmonsters2]

wait okay this is the real last one, i swear. buckynat x reader, haunting of hill house-esque vibe where they notice reader is slowly going insane and they realize it's the ghosts in the home who are at fault

buckynat x reader is what I want if I'm being real honest.

Pairing: buckynat x fem!reader (The Haunting of Hill House AU)

Warnings: spoopy a lil 🥺

Count: < 1k

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷

Natasha stirred, hearing quiet footsteps pitter-pattering about. She opened her eyes and found herself in Bucky's arms, the metal one over her waist.

But something was missing.

You weren't in her arms.

"Bucky," Natasha whispered after she turned in his embrace. She shook him a little as he snored. "Bucky."

"Huh," Bucky grunted softly as his eyes fluttered open. "What's wrong?"

"It's happening again," Natasha whispered again as if afraid something—someone would hear her.

"Shit," Bucky sat up, adjusting his shirt that had ridden up as he slept. "Where is she?"

"I don't know...in the halls maybe?" Natasha muttered as she got out of bed, Bucky following her.

"Well, she can't wander around too much. Most of the house is under construction and I've blocked it off," Bucky tried to reassure the redhead, but it was rather hard when he felt worried as well.

This was supposed to be nothing more than a quick summer project. They've flipped tons of houses before without any issues.

But there was something wrong with this place. Other than the obvious structural issues...it was like the house breathed at night.

The housekeepers had said there had been...deaths in the house before. Nothing crazy, just people passing away in their sleep. Even so, they had refused to be in the house after sunset as part of their contract.

Incidences left and right. It started with you saying that you thought you heard things. Natasha slept most nights fitfully.

And Bucky? It felt like his skin was crawling all the time.

They both carefully crept towards the door, opening it just a sliver to peer out.

There was nothing in the hallway, just the creaking of the walls.

Until you rounded the corner.

Your footsteps were light, graceful even.

It was unlike you.

You muttered to yourself. "They're leaving me. They're leaving me. No, no, no."

You shook your head, turning to the side, peering at something Bucky and Natasha had no idea of what.

"Stop lying. They wouldn't. They're not. They're not..."

It was silent for a moment before you put your hands to your ears.

"I didn't want to be in the middle. I get too hot. Bucky...Bucky doesn't care who's in the middle. No, they weren't. They were running errands today..."

Natasha's heart thudded in her chest. Who the hell were you talking to?

Bucky clenched his jaw, his grip on Natasha's hips tightening as he stared at you.

God, you looked so...so tired.

"We need to leave this place, Bucky."

"And go where, Nat?" Bucky whispered back. "All our money is tied up in this place. If we don't flip it, we're going to be in a hole."

"But there's obviously something wrong, Buck," Natasha insisted quietly, keeping her eyes on you. "Look at her. I don't want to say it but there's something in this house."

"I know that," Bucky sighed, reluctant as well to admit it. "But what should we do?"

"I don't know. We should only fix up the place during the day and like the housekeepers, leave this place at night. Tony owns a bunch of hotel chains, doesn't he? We'll just ask where the closest one is that he owns and if he could give us a room until the renovations are over and we've sold the place. We'll just give him what we owe once the house sells," Natasha sighed. She really hated asking people to help her like this, but if it was for your sake, she'd do anything.

"Okay," Bucky swallowed, hating even more, to have to ask for Tony's help. But just like Natasha, he'd do anything for you.

"What should we do now?" Bucky asked.

Natasha pursed her lips. "I don't know. Interrupting her makes her twitchy. But we should see if we could coax her back to bed."

Suddenly, you whipped your head in their direction, catching their eyes.

[julemmaes]

Robyn

Rowaelin Month, Day Ten

A/N: I'd planned on posting them in order, but you get what you get. Idk when the other prompts will come tbf. I hope soon. Anyway, I managed to write over 6k words today and I'm pretty fucking proud.

This is just fluff over fluff, so yep enjoy!!

Word count: 3,047

Rowan was unbelievably late as he sped through the streets of Orynth.

So late that the school had called not only him, but also the front desk of the place where he worked when he hadn't answered the call on his personal phone. Sorscha, his assistant, had entered his office with an embarrassed smile on her lips, as if she didn't want to tell him that he had forgotten for the umpteenth time to pick up his daughter from school.

Lorcan had joined him, for some strange reason, but Rowan had stopped bothering when it came to his best friend. He'd been trying to figure out how he reasoned for years and had come to the conclusion that there was no logical sense in the actions of the man sitting next to him, who was currently singing at the top of his lungs to one of the songs on the Frozen CD - which much to the chagrin of both of them, had gotten stuck in his car radio months before, forcing them into hours of torture.

He would never deny that the songs were all quite catchy, but after the sixteenth time Rowan had had to listen to Let It Go at maximum volume, his positive opinion of the film had begun to waver.

As they pulled into the school parking lot, Rowan noticed with deep regret that the only cars still there were those of the teachers and school staff.

They both got out of the car, Rowan walking quickly towards the entrance while Lorcan dragged behind him.

He greeted the caretakers sitting at the entrance, who returned a big smile. A smile that grew even wider when his large, imposing friend entered a few moments later. He stopped to talk to the old ladies and Rowan walked down the corridor he knew led to Robyn's classroom.

He could hear muffled voices from inside the teachers' room on the left and the one he knew belonged to Miss Galathynius coming from the right. He looked out over the classroom, spotting the two people sitting at a desk.

As soon as his daughter saw him, her eyes widened and a huge smile flashed across her face.

No words. No "hello, daddy!" or "I missed you!" from the little girl.

Her teacher turned as she leapt out of her chair and ran towards him, hugging his legs and looking up at him. Rowan smiled at her in turn, running a hand over her hair that was shot in every direction.

"Hello, little bird," he murmured to her. The child's smile widened even more if that was possible.

The woman a few feet away from them pulled herself upright, crossing her arms over her chest and offering a sincere smile to the child, who hid behind his thighs.

Rowan was about to tell her that Robyn was shy with everyone like this, ready to defend his daughter's behaviour as he was used to doing in front of every adult, but he was beaten to the punch.

"It's good to see you, Mr Whitethorn," she said, extending a hand. Rowan shook it without hesitation. "Actually, I just wanted to write you a letter regarding Robyn," she continued, never taking her eyes off the little girl. "Nothing serious," she hastened to reassure him when Rowan grimaced, "quite the contrary. Robyn is remarkably good. One of the best in the class, though I shouldn't offer that information so bluntly."

Miss Galathynius winked at him, but he couldn't process what he'd just been told.

"Sorry, could you-"

The little hands clamped around his trousers tightened a fraction more and Rowan looked down, trying to figure out what was bothering his daughter, but then something happened that he hadn't even dared to dream about in recent times.

"You're here!"

The little girl broke off and ran away from him in less than the blink of an eye.

Rowan turned just in time to see Lorcan grab Robyn in mid-air, spinning her around as he brought her to his chest and showered her with kisses. The loud, incessant laughter that erupted from her seemed too much coming from that fragile little body, but he never tired of hearing it.

"Why hello baby!" said Lorcan laughing in turn, starting to tickle her until she begun to rebel and he was forced to let her slide to the floor. Robyn was still laughing at the top of her lungs and nearly fell to the ground as she squealed left and right, letting herself be pushed around by the closest thing to an uncle she had ever had.

When Rowan turned back to the woman, she was wide-eyed and her lips slightly parted as she watched the massive man dressed completely in black and the menacing face turn into a completely different person the second he had seen Robyn.

He chuckled, "I know, it's not every day you get to see a little girl be so comfortable with a brute like that."

Lorcan, who was listening to everything, looked him straight in the eye and without stopping smiling and playing with the little girl, mouthed to him to fuck off.

"Well, yeah. You caught me a little off guard." she confessed, still shocked to hear how Robyn was having a full conversation with Lorcan. They couldn't hear anything of what she was actually saying, but even just the fact she was talking to someone seemed to have Aelin unsettled.

She returned her attention to Rowan and let out a breath that sounded more like a giggle, "I've never heard her laugh before."

He nodded, blushing a little at the teacher's surprised but relieved tone.

"I'm sure the dean warned you about the problem she has," he said in a low voice. He grimaced at her poor choice of words, "I mean, not problem, but the difficulty she finds in interacting with people she doesn't know."

Liar, he told himself. Robyn hadn't spoken to anyone but him and Lorcan since the day Lyria had died. It wasn't a difficulty, but a response to the trauma that prevented her from speaking to anyone who wasn't part of her immediate family.

"I know, I know. We've been looking for solutions together." she informed him. "I give her a white board every morning. Come on, I'll show you." she turned to the desk they were sitting at earlier and raised the magnetic board, on which a few words were scribbled on. "I'll write here what she might need. Yes. No. I need to go to the bathroom. I'm thirsty. I'm hungry." she read, listing the various options. Rowan gaped. "We've only just started going over the alphabet for a second time, so she can't really read or write yet, as I imagine you know, but the little drawings next to each sentence help her."

She continued talking, but he couldn't quite follow.

The woman in front of him - aside from being breathtakingly beautiful - had done as much as she could to help her child with communication.

"Mr. Whitethorn-"

"Rowan. Please, call me Rowan." he said, clearing his throat once he realized how hoarse it sounded to his ears. Lorcan walked up to them at that point, still holding Robyn in his arms and positioned himself next to him, letting their shoulders touch in a comforting way.

"Call me Aelin, then," she smiled at them both. Then she made a small grimace, turning to Rowan, "I wanted to ask if it bothered you, that I sought a solution like that. Maybe I put her in distress, embarrassed her. I'm sorry if I gave you the impression that I wanted to solve this on my own. I really wanted to discuss it with you, with your husband too, to avoid misunderstandings. Maybe we could arrange a meeting."

He was about to tell her that she had given him the exact opposite of annoyance, that he had been more than pleased that she had helped Robyn this way, when her words finally registered.

Lorcan, beside him, had opened his mouth wide and his lips were slowly bending into a mischievous smile.

Rowan furrowed his brow, "I'm sorry, what?"

Aelin's smile seemed to falter. "A meeting? With you? To talk about how to handle the situation," then she shifted her gaze to Lorcan, "You're more than welcome to join as well. I didn't know Robyn had two dads, I apologise for assuming Robyn had a mum and dad. That was very rude of me-"

"I love this," Lorcan whispered, laughing in shock. He turned to Rowan with eyes that sparkled with amusement, "I would definitely be the top."

Rowan looked at him with an expression of complete shock on his face, "What the fuck are you talking about?"

Robyn gasped, opening her eyes wide and bringing a hand to her mouth, pointing then to Rowan's.

"Yeah, sorry, love. I shouldn't have said the bad word." he apologised, giving her a quick kiss on the forehead. He turned back to Miss Galathynius, "I'm sorry to have to disappoint you, but we're not married."

"No need to lie, sweetie. I'm sure Aelin," he gave her a knowing look, "doesn't mind at all about our relationship status."

Aelin nodded, "Well, yes. That doesn't change anything. Mr..." she turned to Lorcan, searching for a name.

"Salvaterre."

"Mr. Salvaterre can still attend. The fact that you are not yet married is no reason why you cannot both be present at the meeting. You don't have to worry, we are a very tolerant school and if anyone bothers you, you can come directly to me."

A sound of sheer glee escaped Lorcan.

Aelin continued, "I mean it. I was pleased to see both of you today. I was also pleased to see Robyn smiling so much." she concluded, looking the little one in the face.

Rowan took a deep breath, bracing himself, "No, I meant, we're not a couple. We're not gay. He's her uncle."

The woman's blonde eyebrows shot up and a second later she turned almost as red as the dress Robyn was wearing as Lorcan shook his head muttering something very much like 'you're no fun', which made Robyn giggle.

"Why did you even get off the car?" he asked him exasperated.

Lorcan shrugged, "Because I missed my little bean, you monster." he replied, clutching Robyn to his chest. The little girl clutched Lorcan's shirt in her chubby little hands and Rowan huffed, shaking his head.

Aelin brought her hands to her face, leaning against the desk behind her. She shook her head, her face still hidden, "Oh, god. I'm so sorry."

Lorcan let out a dry laugh, "Don't worry about it. It was fun while it lasted." then he turned to Rowan again, who was still trying to recover from the idea of being involved in a relationship with his friend, "You're really no fun."

"Yeah, no fun dad." repeated Robyn.

Silence fell over the class. Rowan looked at her with wide eyes and blinked once, twice. Robyn was staring at him with a sweet scowl that mimicked so much that of the man who was still holding her, but Rowan couldn't get over the fact that his daughter had spoken while Aelin was still beside them.

He was about to talk, noticing how Robyn had started squirming in Lorcan's arms, when there was a knock at the door.

They both turned, Aelin peering over Rowan's shoulder, and saw the figure of a petite girl with black hair and eyes standing in the doorway, watching them with her head slightly bent to the side. She had a tag on her t-shirt that was too colourful to belong to someone who didn't work in a school with children, so he guessed she was a teacher herself. Besides, Rowan felt like he'd seen her elsewhere. Probably every day when he picked Robyn up from school, he said to himself.

"I know you're not supposed to eavesdrop but I stopped by earlier and heard you were a couple of dads," she said by way of introduction. "I just wanted to reassure you that the school is an extremely safe place. I'm the one who did most of the interviews with the parents," that's where they had met then, "and one of the questions that is asked is just about the tolerance of the people who will be attending the school."

Aelin watched her, remaining silent the whole time and putting on an amused smile, nodded, "That's what I was telling them. How tolerant the school is. They make such a cute couple, don't you think, Elide?"

Rowan turned to her, arching an eyebrow, silently asking her what she was doing. The woman, as if she could truly understand what he was trying to convey to her, nodded her head towards Lorcan, who Rowan only then noticed was standing weirdly, his eyes fixed on the woman in the doorway.

He grinned, deciding to take his revenge right away. "Oh, yes. Thank you so much for the reassurance," Rowan began to play along as well. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Lorcan turn towards him, dropping Robyn to the floor, who made a disapproving noise at being dumped so suddenly. "We are happy to know that this school is a safe place for our daughter. And for us."

Elide offered him a blinding smile, "Good. I'm happy to hear that you are pleased so far. And I am happy that Aelin is the one who is taking your daughter's class. She's the best one here."

Rowan didn't know her yet, but he knew the thing Elide had just said could only be true.

"Well," she said again, giving them an apologetic smile, "I really must go now, but if you need anything, you can find all my contact details on the website. Have a nice day!"

Aelin and Rowan said their goodbyes, thanking her. Lorcan took a while to recover, but when he realised he was staring into empty space he ran towards the door, almost stepping on little Robyn, who was moved by Aelin.

"We are very much not gay, miss!" he shouted into the hallway. Aelin, now beside him and with a hand on Robyn's shoulder, cackled. With Lorcan's infinite luck, someone walked by just then and gave him a stern look. "Oh, shut up ma'am. I'm an ally. The best ally."

Rowan shook his head as Lorcan launched himself in pursuit of the poor teacher and burst out laughing when he heard him shout, "I'm not homophobic! I'm willing to suck someone's cock if I have to prove it to you!"

Aelin opened her mouth wide before bursting out laughing in turn.

Robyn, seeing both adults so happy, giggled too and Rowan bent down to pick her up. The little girl laid her full head of white-light hair on his shoulder and closed her eyes.

She was tired and Rowan really needed to get her home to sleep.

He glanced at Aelin and reduced his lips to a thin line, "I'm sorry about the commotion, I'll try not to bring him into the building again. Even if it means tying him to the seat."

The soft laugh she gave made something tighten in his chest. He frowned.

Aelin didn't seem to notice the effect she had on him, "Don't worry, Elide is crazy about fools like him. If he says the right things, we might start seeing each other outside of school too."

Rowan nodded, now too caught up in the thought of having to take Robyn home to focus on anything else.

They agreed on when to hold the parent-teacher meeting and then he grabbed Robyn's backpack, walking towards the exit.

He was thoughtless as he reached into his pocket for his keys and balanced everything else - including the girl - on his other arm, but when Robyn's hand brushed his cheek, he looked down and his eyes met their twins. Green against green.

"What is it?"

The little girl's voice never stopped making him smile. Each time was like the first time she had said dada.

"I really like her."

Rowan frowned, "Who?"

"Miss Aelin." she whispered, almost as if she was afraid they might hear her.

He smiled at her, "Yeah? You like her?"

"She's nice to me."

Rowan had to put her down as he opened the door and let her get into the back seats by herself.

"I'm glad she's treating you well, love," he let her know, buckling her in.

He hoped she'd tell him more about her new teacher, but like any kid her age, the topic of conversation couldn't last for more than four lines apiece, "Where's Uncle Lorcan?"

Rowan snorted, "No idea, little bird."

Robyn nodded, "Elide is pretty too."

And as if those words had summoned him, Lorcan appeared beside the car, making them both scream. He entered the car in a heartbeat and turned to his daughter, who was still settling into the seat. "Do you know Miss Lochan?"

But before she could answer him, Rowan had entered the car in turn and smacked the back of his head, which made the Robyn giggle, "You're not using my daughter as your wingman. Now stop it and buckle up."

Lorcan gave him a gentle push, before doing as he was told and for once he was happy he'd convinced him to do something.

Or at least, Rowan thought he had convinced him.

"What if I left you a note to deliver to Miss Lochan, Rob? Would you be up for it?"

Rowan knew, even without looking at her, that she was nodding emphatically.

Keeping his eyes on the road, he murmured, "Could you stop calling my daughter Rob, please? You'll give her an existential crisis."

Lorcan clicked his tongue against his palate, "Rowan, I'm not giving her a damn thing. We live in this new world, okay? Your daughter could be called Simon and still be a beautiful princess. Grow up and educate yourself before you talk shit."

"Aaaah!" shouted Robyn, "Bad word!"

Rowan sighed and shook his head, but still he was smiling.

This was his life. Had been for the past two years.

And he wouldn't change it for the world.

tog tag list (if you wanna be added or removed just dm me or send me an ask)

@maastrash @ireallyshouldsleeprn @sleeping-and-books @hellasblessed @thegoddessofyou @ghostlyrose2 @claralady @sayosdreams @perseusannabeth @letstakethedawn @terrible-and-proud @post-it-notes33 @booksstorm @nalgenewhore @queen-of-demons-and-hell @lanyjoy-13 @vasudharaghavan @cupcakey00 @bri-loves-sunflowers @queen-of-glass @thewayshedreamed @the-regal-warrior @fangirlprincess09 @januarystears @rowaelinismyotp @starbornsinger @bookstantrash @thegreyj @feysand-loml @autumnbabylon @a-court-of-milkandhoney @highqueenofelfhame @story-scribbler @mariamuses @rhysandswingspan @tanvee1231

[ilyasorokinn]

(day 6) christmas sweaters , oliver ekman-larsson

note, this fic is part of my 14 days of christmas. check out this masterlist if you're interested. none of these fics in this series are connected, they are all standalone. pair, oliver ekman-larsson x reader summary, oliver comes home with y/n for the holidays, but there's one thing she left out. y/n's mom has a stockpile of christmas sweaters, one from each year since her older brother was born. and when she heard oliver was coming over, she immediately ordered one for him too. warnings, one curse word (is ass a curse word?) word count, 1277 words

(gif not mine)

"So, remind me again, who's coming?" Oliver asked as he took the seat next to you in the practically empty airport. You were traveling a few days before Christmas, and you'd think it would be crowded, but for some reason, it wasn't.

"Well, us, my mom, my dad, my brother, and his wife and two kids, my sister and maybe her boyfriend, and lastly, my grandma and grandpa." You listed.

"Okay, so a full house." Oliver nodded along.

"Yep." You nodded, taking a sip of your drink.

"Did you pack all the gifts?" He asked.

"I did." You nodded, "Geez, you'd think I'd be nervous about these things, but you're the one who's nervous." You joked.

"I have every right to panic." He stood back up and began his pacing again, "This is the first year we're spending Christmas with your family."

"I know, but it's not like you've never met them before. We've spent Thanksgiving with them and we've spent summer with them before. Just breath." You tried to reassure your boyfriend.

He took a deep breath and sat back down in the seat next to you. You handed him your coffee, which he greedily shot back, "Hey!"

"I'm the one panicking here," Oliver repeated. You only sighed, sitting back in the chair.

-

You got out of the Uber and walked up the small rock path to the door of your childhood home. Before you could even knock your mom was ripping the door open and enveloping you in a hug.

"Oh, hi, mom." You laughed, dropping your suitcase handle and wrapping your arms around her.

"We haven't seen you in so long." She murmured.

"We saw you a month ago." You reminded her.

"I know, but that was so long ago." She squeezed you tighter before pulling away so she could look at you. She spotted Oliver behind you and quite literally pushed you aside.

"Oh, Oliver." She wrapped her arms around him.

".2 seconds ago you were so excited to see me." You muttered. Your dad came out of the kitchen, an apron tied around his waist.

"I thought I heard you come in." He beamed, wrapping his arms around you.

"Hi, dad." You smiled.

"How was the flight? Are you tired? We've your room all set up." She told Oliver, who looked slightly overwhelmed.

"Geez, Celine, let them breathe." Your dad laughed, pulling away from you, and looked over to Oliver, "Good to see you again, Oliver."

"And you as well, Mr. Y/L/N." Oliver smiled.

"Oh, please, call me Rod."

"All right." Oliver nodded, letting out a relieved sigh when your dad pulled away. He took his spot next to you, and he grabbed your hand.

"Your room is all set if you guys want to get settled in. Your sweaters are on your bed, so put them on then come back down. I want to see if they fit. If not, I'll fix it." Your mother pushed you upstairs.

"Sweaters?" Oliver asked confused.

"You didn't tell him about the sweaters?" Your father asked.

"Well...I..." You stuttered, trying to find the words.

"Y/N'll tell you upstairs." Your father cut in. A timer went off in the kitchen, and he was off, "Those are my potatoes." He rushed off to the kitchen.

"I can't believe you didn't tell him about the sweaters." Your mother playfully glared as she made her way back into the living room where he previously was.

"What sweaters?" Oliver asked again.

You chuckled, walking into your bedroom, where two Christmas sweaters were sitting on your bed, "My mom always buys family Christmas sweaters. She gets them for every family member who celebrates with us."

"She got one for me?" Oliver asked, almost tearfully as he examined the sweater.

"Yeah, of course she did. You're a part of this family now." You smiled, "I've never brought a guy home until you, so you're very special."

"Oh, I feel very special." Oliver joked.

"Just put the sweater on." You rolled your eyes and smiled as you walked out of your childhood room and back down to the living room, already wearing your sweater.

Oliver quickly followed, slipping his sweater on as he stumbled down the stairs, "Oh, look at the two of you." Your mother gushed, already reaching for her camera.

"Mom..." You sighed.

"Oh, let her." Your father voiced from the kitchen. Oliver chuckled, pressing a kiss to your head as he wrapped an arm around your shoulders, smiling for the photo.

-

The next day, everyone else had arrived and the house was lively. Tons of gifts were under the tree, all the Christmas lights were turned on, there were snow angels and snowmen in the front yard, and the house smelled like hot chocolate and cinnamon.

"Now can we open presents, grandma?" Your niece, Angela asked, tugging on your mother's shirt.

She laughed, "Yes, go wait in the living room." Both your niece and nephew sprinted into the living room as the rest of you congregated to the living room. All of you were decked out in your Christmas sweaters.

Your sister-in-law and mother made quick work of passing out all the gifts to the designated people. The moment presents were presented to Angela and Henry, they were tearing the wrapping paper off.

Your mother handed you a gift with a knowing smile on her face. You raised a brow, but read the name tag of who it was from, "I thought were already gave each other our gifts." You glanced over at Oliver.

He only shrugged with a smirk. You ripped the paper off to reveal what looked like a ring box. Your breathing hitched as you opened the lid, "Before you panic, it's not an engagement ring." You laughed, "It's a promise ring of sorts." He explained.

"And if you look inside, there's an inscription." He pointed. You pulled out the ring and on the inside was your favorite quote, from Pride and Prejudice. It read, "You have bewitched me body and soul and I love, love, love you."

"Ollie." You laughed, wrapping your arms around his neck.

"You like it?" He teased.

"I love it." You pulled away, kissing him on the cheek.

After all the presents were opened, your brother explained the tech item he had gotten for your mom and dad. Your sister was helping your grandparents with their Alexa speaker and your sister-in-law was playing with Henry and Angela.

You and Oliver watched everything, just enjoying the moment wrapped up in each other's arms, "I really like my ring. Thank you, Ollie."

"I'm glad." He smiled, pressing another kiss to your forehead.

"Family photo!" Your mother announced. Oliver unwrapped himself from you and stood up.

"I'll take it." He volunteered.

"What're you talking about? You're gonna be in the photo." Your mother smacked his hands away.

"Really, it's fine. I can take it." He insisted.

"Sit your ass back down, Oliver." Your mother pushed him back in your direction. She set the camera up, and hit the capture button, then quickly got into her spot next to your dad. You could hear the countdown, then felt the flash.

She got up and examined the photo, "Oh, it's perfect." She gushed.

You looked up at your boyfriend, "You're a part of this family, you know." You told him.

"I guess so. It's gonna take some time to settle in, though." He admitted.

"Well, get used to it. You're stuck with me now. We can never break up, like ever." You told him.

He laughed, "It's a good thing I don't plan on it." You smiled, wrapping your arms around his waist, and hugged him close.

-

my taglist: @brandtsclarke @jackydrury @joelsfarabees @puckinrightschicagoo @tysonjost-taylorsversion @besthockeyfics @boqvistsbabe @joshsandersons @stars-canucks @josthours @iwantahockeyhimbo @blondiekook @2manytabsopen @lady-laura-speaks @youngbeezer @maximoff-xmen @nightmareonspookystreet @ghostyjosty @heatherawoowoo @hockeyunits @thescooby-gang @nilspettersson @123happyllama @mattyskies @ggggmoneyyyy @voidohanax @4ambagelbites @lovethepreds @ashleymarine @colecauliflower @peteysimp @eve132 @wherethedinonuggies @ciziikas @monamourthings-blog @x-a-v20x @satanxklaus @himbobimboeater @brandonbagel @Pasta88love @paintlavillered @itssophlouise @lam-ila @HockeyJedi13 @kidlnthedark @letsgocaps21 @tkachukitout@drysdaleseyes @bootyquay @liz-69 @tanninetanya @duhaimes @kermits-fat-cock @raysofcrosby @drei-mrssvechii

add yourself to my taglist!

taylor's 14 days of christmas masterlist!

[aindreisblythe]

Aindreis couldn't defend his recent bad choices.Coming here had lead to bad choices but nothing said that staying in North Berwick would've meant smooth sailing. That's the thing that makes choices so daunting: you never have all the information and you will never know all the what ifs. You wouldn't be having this conversation if he'd left work on time, but then how long would you have gone on without this much needed conversation? Probably, as usual with you two, until it was almost too late.

Now, Andy did wonder if it wasn't already too late. If he didn't already break something he could never mend. Yes, the sarcasm stung but the understandable refusal of his apologies and the lack of real anger in your voice felt like a dagger. He bit his inner cheek. He understood you, he did. He knew how this all looked, he knew what he did and he also knew that he hadn't really been forthcoming with any explanation. Sure, it wouldn't excuse anything, but if only he'd dared ask for your help or at least your advice, things would be different. What felt like aeons ago, you'd told him that you would shoulder what you could from his problems and ever since, he'd been scared, in the back of his mind, that'd been right when he said that you might not have known what you were walking into. And your "I won't" did nothing to reassure him. That's it, he thought, we've hit the point of no return and we're just pretending we didn't see it. He would have gone after you but the "I won't" kept ringing in his ears and he imagined himself coming home to an empty flat and a note. That you wouldn't do it like that didn't matter for the horrible fantasies of his mind. Reality plays little role in our worst fears.

Tearing up, he watched you go and stayed there, standing up. He wanted to go after you, but if he couldn't apologise and if he didn't want to make promises he wouldn't be able to keep, would it be of any purpose? He knew you didn't say all you could've and probably wanted to and he wasn't sure he could take more right now. It had been the kind of day that left him drained, and he would normally have sought a hug and probably would've fallen asleep in your arms on the couch until you gently woke him up. Now he was too scared you'd drop his hand if he tried to hold yours again.

Now, trying his best not to cry, he set up the bed in the greenhouse. He knew you'd probably set up your bed in the living room since all other rooms were occupied, but he didn't want you two in the way of everyone's path like that. Not when whatever would happen tonight, he didn't want his family to see like that. He also thought that maybe, if you were too mad, if it was too late, you wouldn't have to share a bed with him.

He got down and wondered if you'd already be in bed but he wasn't surprised to see you in the bathroom. He didn't make a sound. If he couldn't make things better, he didn't want to make them worse. He was genuinely surprised to feel your hand on his. At your silent question, he almost started crying. He closed his eyes for a second and signed "I won't let us not be." He might not know yet how he would make things better, but he would. He had to.

At the rest of your words, he simply nodded. He wanted that too. He didn't even understand how things got this bad. You had so many plans for this place, for your life here... He didn't answer. To say what? To promise what? He just signed an "I love you" in return. While Aindreis was now painfully aware that he hadn't eaten that much all day, he nodded when you mentioned bed. And he was relieved that when he said he still needed to brush his teeth but he'd made the bed in the greenhouse, you said he'd see you there in a few minutes. So he hurried and he was even more relieved when you offered him a space in his arms. Maybe you were mad, but all hope wasn't lost.

At your words, he turned to see you, confused. "You...? I regret the choices I made today and I definitely regret hiring fucking Fergus but I don't regret coming here." He settled back in your arms. "I like that it's just us without all the... history. I wish things were a little different, sure, but I don't regret it. And I don't regret anything involving you... what did you mean by that?" He asked, taking your hand in his. "Hm... do you regret coming here? You can tell me."

Funny, right ? How life was just a succession of choices, bumped by other people's choices ? Ali had made the choice to come to North Berwick, because you chose to come here for work. He chose to go pick up your family from the airport because you made the choice to repair someone else's mistake. It's all about choice, and these days, Ali felt like you two made all the wrong ones. Funny, how life works.

"Oh, you gathered..." Ali replied in a sarcastic voice as you spoke. He then closed his eyes and rubbed husbands against them. Quickly though, they were in yours, and you started talking again. Ali listened, as he always did, but something felt different. Maybe he'd just heard too many apologies from you, put the blame on too many horrible days. If he was usually comprehensive and didn't question you any further, tonight, he was incapable of doing just that.

"Stop. Stop apologising, stop putting all the blame on yourself and adding more to your plate. That's because it's already full that we're here right now. You can't sorry yourself away from this conversation. Sorry won't make you come home sooner, horrible days won't make you tougher. They'll make you come home later and later because you think you'll be able to fix things until they're normal, and good again. Don't pretend to be a hero. I am not in love with a hero ! I just want you to figure your shit out. Delegate. And as long as you don't, I can't be waiting around at home for you. I won't."

Ali let his hands glide off yours, and kissed your cheek. A heavy silence took over the room, and he started going back into the apartment. The pain caused by the words he'd just told you was agonising. There was a reason you two were bad at communicating. You always were, right from the start. It was all you were able to do. Ali's therapist would say he was repeating childhood patterns. He could work on it, really, but it appeared way too hard tonight. You needed to hear his thoughts, he couldn't shield you from them any longer, he couldn't keep them for himself any longer. How long until you two broke altogether, if things were to continue like this ? Were you about to become roommates ? Ali didn't sign for this. He didn't move into the unknown to simply share a flat with you. The dilemma of it all was the most challenging part. Ali was convinced you were his person, and no job or fight could ever change his mind. Then and now, you were the one person who made him feel at peace, you were half of his soul, and the star he looked for in the sky at night. You were the compass that gave him the way, the sun that warmed his skin and the storm that gave him that rush of dopamine during a long, scorching day. You were his memories, and you were his future, Ali was certain of this, but future was never meant to look so bleak with you. Not again.

Alone in the bathroom, tears rolled down his cheeks as he prepared for bed in silence. What more was there to say ? What could you add that could possibly make things better tonight, when you were both tired from the day you spent, and from the conversation you just had ? His mind screamed all the words he wanted to say to you, but he was only meant by the seal of his lips against their reflection in the mirror.

He didn't hear you come in. He just put his hand above yours on the sink's countertop. When he looked into the mirror, he realised the core of the anger was gone. He was still angry, don't be fooled, but now, fatigue was just stronger. He took his toothbrush out and whispered while signing. "Are we gonna be okay ?"

Usually, signing was a way of running from the fight, sort of. A way to communicate a little more, without running out of words. However tonight, Ali meant it as a way to make peace. A way to take a step towards you, and show you that he hoped, at least, that everything was indeed going to be okay. He then continued to sign. "I love you. I just want this to be our home, not yours and mine separately. I want us to make a life in here, I don't want a whole separate life from yours, and I don't want this flat to be the only representation of *us* that we have.... I'm tired. Let's get into bed, okay ?"

In bed, in the shadows of the numerous fairy lights you had hung behind the bed, you two were used to have longer, deeper conversations. Sometimes, these conversations were the best, and it felt like communicating in this cozy atmosphere eased both your minds in spectacular ways. Ali laid behind you and wrapped his arm around your waist.

" Do you have any regrets coming here ? You would tell me, right ? Even if these regrets involved...me ? You know I can hear anything."