#or maybe it wants to learn a new language
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ê© DATING MR. CRAWLING .á
SFW GN!Reader HCS after the blissful love life ending.
Italics is in the other worldâs language! Sometimes more the implied message rather than a direct translation. I'll probably do Mr. Hood later too :3 !
Your bed is much more comfortable than anything in the other world, and it only makes it better that mr. Crawling gets to be in it with you. He grows accustomed to your nightly routine and is always excited to cuddle up. Big spoon, little spoon, facing each otherâall of it makes him as happy as can be!
(^ As someone who still has a twin size, some of us have to invest in a much bigger one lol)
Generally so so affectionate and loves when youâre physically affectionate !! You can kiss his head and heâll giggle, maybe point at his face and ask âAgain!â You leave kisses all over his face, and his hands pull you in close when you finally kiss his lips.
One of Mr. Crawling's strongest traits is his patienceâespecially when it comes to you. The first day you come home without him trailing behind (much to his dismay, and honestly yours), heâs at the door to greet you, smiling and giggling as you wrap your arms around him. You find out he hadnât done much but wait for you to come home. (With no complaints of boredom on his part, and all the worry on yours.)
He'll sit as you play with his hair, trying out new hairstyles or putting in clips. âMe cute? Pretty?â he asks. And if you let him do the same in return, he'll giggle and compliment you too.
I think heâd look through your closet and enjoy watching you try on clothes too. He compliments you and feels each of the fabrics, liking the ones that feel softest. He might try on some of the accessories if none of the actual clothes (sort ofâŠ) fit, and is really happy when you match!
Mr. Crawling is a fast learner. You worry he'll feel overwhelmed with all the new technology and words and whatever else, so you focus on making sure heâs comfortable. But he points at things and ask what they are, repeating after you. âYou teach me language?â he asks and you laugh softly before nodding. âI teach you language.â
He will accidentally touch a hot stove top or pot if you don't remember to warn him beforehand. Then whenever you cook he gets worried you'll hurt yourself, watching to make sure you're alright (forgive him if he pulls your hand away and says âDanger! Don't touch!â)
Since he doesn't know his birthday, you make the day you returned special instead! He's happy to just stay in with you, eating a good meal and watching or learning something new.
Mr. Crawling also learns when yours is and does his best to make it a good day for you too. He tries singing happy birthday and makes food with what you have at home, mimicking the meals he's seen you prepare.
You teach him how to call your phone while you're away. It's supposed to âbe for emergencies,â but you both know he's going to call just to hear your voice, and who are you to complain?
I think he gets sad sometimes when he sees or hears you talking to friendsâthe way you communicate and laugh so easily compared to conversations with him. The other world's language itself is limited, and he hasn't learned enough of your own. You spend some evenings reassuring him, reminding him learning is a process, and it doesn't change your feelings!!
He does his best to learn on his own. You buy (exercise) books and show him shows for younger kids and he spends a lot of time alone with them, both to surprise you, and also just because he loves talking with you and wants to talk more and more.
The first time he speaks your language is a special day. After many days of calling out that youâre back, he decides to say it himself. âYou home!â You almost drop everything in your hands, and thatâs when he continues, âMiss you.â It feels odd hearing it in his voice, but heâs grinning so wide, and you wonât find out for a while just how excited and nervous he was waiting for you to get home.
One of Mr. Crawlingâs favourite things to say and hear is âI love you.â Every time you say it, he gets all giddy and tries to get closer to you (as if thatâs possible while already cuddling in bed). He says it a lot while youâre doing chores or really nothing, just to remind you and see you smile. Thereâs no way in his mind for those 3 words to lose their meaning, or become any less special.
#first post on here ! i tried not to make it too longhfjhgj i'm a little nervous omg#homicipher x reader#mr crawling x reader#homicipher fluff#mr crawling fluff#mr. crawling x reader#homicipher#thrfted#thrft it
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This one has been going around a bit, and there are a few comments to the effect of "timestamps on spells mean you can use infinite spells" or "unique wizard codes to make every spell unique", and ...
I think I understand the instinct to do this, to "solve" the idea. You put yourself in the shoes of a wizard, and you think about how you would go about breaking open the seams of magic so that you can cast the fireball you want rather than the weird, awkward fireball that takes you five attempts to cast.
However, if "append garbage or UID" were a valid solution, then the entire conceit would just evaporate. It's the kind of "solution" that would not be sufficiently interesting to include in a story. If you were writing a novel and had this system set up, and a character came along and gave this as their answer, and they were right then the reader would immediately ask "wait, why has no one thought of this before?" AND you wouldn't get any of the elements of tension.
So if I were actually building a system that needed to work for a story, something that was built out enough that the reader could feel like they understood the language, it would need to be built with some considerations in mind:
It must not be possible to easily replicate a spell.
Every part of the spell specification must "do something", even if what it does is relatively minor.
The language must be complicated enough that new techniques can be discovered over time through great effort.
The earliest people to use the system cannot have simply learned everything about it right away.
I don't consider this to be an easy design problem for a system that's going to live in a story, especially since if you make it completely exposed to the reader, there's a risk that some reader who is more dedicated or clever will come along and "solve" it.
When I was a kid, everyone was worried about "peak oil". There were rapidly depleting reserves! Even if consumption stayed steady, less oil was going to be tapped over time, it was simply a question of resource extraction, and that meant prices were going to soar!
But in fact this was more a tug-of-war between depletion and extraction, one that had been going on for a long time. So what happened to peak oil? Maybe it was shale oil and NGL, maybe it was fracking, maybe it was just that production doesn't actually follow a bell curve. Maybe the science that gave us "peak oil" was just wrong, and while the principle that we would eventually deplete all reserves must be correct, the actual understanding of what the oil reserves are was flawed.
This was the kind of thing I wanted in the system though, a tug-of-war, a tension, wizards spending more and more time trying to figure out new ways to create the same effects, getting more and more esoteric, upping the skill level and knowledge-base necessary to become an effective spellcaster.
And this is very tough to design. If you want a puzzle to solve, it's that one, the design problem of a system of spellcasting that has that feature.
Spells are a non-renewable resource. One a spell has been cast, it can never be cast again.
But thankfully, what counts as a unique spell is permissive, and very early on in the history of wizardry, wizards found many ways to use the arcane language to specify a similar effect even if the wording was different.
And still, spells were a non-renewable resource.
There are only so many ways to call forth a beam of lancing light, only a limited number of methods of purifying food to make it safe to eat. Soon it became necessary for the wizards to start casting spells that weren't quite what they wanted: a beam of light that arced to the left, a purifying spell that added a bitter taste, some changes cosmetic and others very functional.
And still, spells were a non-renewable resource.
Wizardry was divided into ages by the historiographers. The First Age was the age of plenty, when wizards could make minor tweaks to the spells and cast as much as they liked. The Second Age was the age of modification, when wizards were jumping through hoops and using methods with side effects. But the Third Age was the age of decay, when so many spells had been used that only the oddballs were left. It was impossible to cast anything even remotely resembling a fireball, not even one that hooked to the left and exploded with sharp green shards.
It came to be that few wizards could produce a spell on their first attempt. They would try, only to discover that someone else had already taken their idea and the spell does not work. They would try again, only to discover that their second idea had also been taken. Wizard battles, which had once been glorious light shows, were reduced to two wizards standing in a field trying to be the first one to stumble upon a spell that had never been cast before.
~~~~
Here are some plot hooks:
Wizards jealously guard their knowledge, fearful that someone will learn of a "seam" of untapped spells, but they also write down every spell they know to have been cast, to reduce their search space. Obviously this trove of knowledge is highly valuable.
The existence of spell "seams", which are really just collections of spells that work off the same cluster of discrete variations, mean that wizards tend to be very specialized. The Sheep Wizard knows eight hundred ways of turning someone into a sheep, because he's studied that area of the arcane language extensively, as well as historical precedents that have been ruled out. The natural enemy of a Sheep Wizard is, of course, another Sheep Wizard.
During the Second Age, a group of wizards get together to deliberately reduce the spell-space, largely in the hopes of reducing the capacity of wizard-kind for making war. Their work largely consists of sitting around casting as many fireballs as they can, depleting all options for everyone else.
During the Third Age, a group of wizards gets together and in the spirit of mutual cooperation begins to define "spell blocks", a collection of spells that a single wizard is entitled to and all other wizards agree not to use. When you become a wizard, you're given a thousand spells which are thought to still be valid, and will lose your license to practice wizardry if you cast any spells that are outside your block. This is difficult to enforce, rife with accusations and suspicion, but is thought to be better than nothing.
During the Fourth Age, a group of "wizards" (none of whom have ever actually cast a spell) are working on the arcane language in the hopes of a revival. As the age of hoarded knowledge has mostly passed, they're able to get their hands on many books that weren't previously available. One day, they invent a new form of specification that allows hundreds of thousands of new spells, re-igniting wizardry.
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~ Where is my Soulmate? ~
Welcome Souls~
I am sending my new pick a pile reading for you.~
We often have to travel a long way to find our eternal, romantic soulmate/divine partner. The road leads through struggles, wounds, lessons and healing. We think about where they are, what they do, what their life is like, when we finally find eachother...
I think, "when" is malleable. The decisions we make, how we shape our lives and ourselves can influence it, and perhaps that's more important where we go with our own growth until we meet them. That's why I didn't get into that in the readings.
Choose the image(s) that attracts you the most. Accept from the messages what you can identify with, and let go of the rest~
Illustrations belongs to Jumo.Art (Facebook, Instagramm, Etsy)
Reminder:
* These are not gender-specific readings, I use They/Them pronouns. * These are collective, timeless readings for entertaintment. * I am not a professional reader and readings that I do are a part of my learning process. * The tarot can provide guidance, but you manage your own life according to your free will. Feel free to keep what resonates, and let go of what doesnât.~ * (English is not my mother language, sorry for the mistakes.)
To what extent are You ready to receive your soulmate? Four of Pentacles, Page of Wands, Sun, Four of Cups, Hierophant
Dear Soul! In this period of your life, you are/have been striving for security, balance, and stability. You plan for the long term, for durability. You focus on building your foundations: it can be your home, your financial situation or your physical body, your health. You are an honest, straightforward person, but cautious. In the past period, you may have closed yourself off a bit to protect everything that is important to you and that you fought for. Maybe you just settled somewhere. You cling to a secure foundation both on the earthly and spiritual planes. At first, under the surface, which may seem stoic and serious, lives a dreamy, enthusiastic, artistic soul with a rich world of emotions. You are ready to use your creativity to develop and enrich yourself with new experiences. Recently, you are starting to open up to the world and come out of your shell. You want to shine like the Sun, enjoy life obliviously, fulfill yourself in it, get the most out of yourself. I feel that your circumstances give you the opportunity to do so. Despite this, you still have moments of skepticism when you feel uncertain. Sometimes you still think about things that didn't go according to your plans. Your experiences and relationships so far have not satisfied your desires and needs, and you cannot really believe that something better than what you experienced in the past can awaits you. However, something that is pure, a sincere gift may appear to you, you just have to break down the barriers built around you and learn to trust again, to believe that the universe -or what you believe in- supports you and encourages you to look at the bigger picture. You are dedicated, you strive to create lasting values in your relationships as well. You would like to share your long-term goals and desires with the right partner to whom you would commit yourself for life. You are looking for a spiritual unity/bond that is solid, where you receive emotional security, mutual trust, intimacy, in which you support and inspire each other, and you can develop together, solving difficulties together.
To what extent are They ready to receive you? Ten of Cups, Eight of Pentacles
Fully! I smile and it fills me with joy when I look at your soulmateâs cards. They are full of love and enthusiasm, they long for a family, a happy home full of laughter and abundance, with you. They think of you as a team, in which they would support you in everything as an equal partner. Maybe lately they have been a little more immersed in their work or other personal projects, but if you find each other, they'll be just as dedicated to your relationship. Maybe they will feel that they have to work for your trust, but they don't mind. They have persistent, hardworking personality. Thoughtful, patient, humble, attentive to details, not intrusive. They will pay attention to you, your signals and what you need. Maybe they will shower you with gifts (if this is what you want), if they see that you like this way of expressing their emotions to you. Maybe they also have an artistic vein, like to create with their hands, and will surprise you with they self-made works. I sense that your soulmate is eager to welcome you into their life, but at the same time they are trying to wait patiently until you are ready to come to them of your own free will.
What symbols and signs will indicate to you that your soulmate is nearby? Knight of Cups
Helmet - It may sounds funny, but I mean a kind of Gallic helmet what the characters wearing in the Asterix stories. Wings (can even be a car emblem) Horse - winged pegasus or earth horse, may be in color white Silver and Blue colors could also dominate. Fish (including goldfish, koi), scales, scaly pattern, wave pattern, Japanese-style waves, which can often be seen in tattoos
When I saw the card, I felt as if my lungs were filled with fresh air. A clean, soothing feeling. I was relieved. Or as if a sip of cool, fresh, clean water had washed my throat. Maybe you will experience similar feelings when you meet them.
Where and under what circumstances will you meet? King of Swords, Tower, Three of Pentacles, Page of Swords
A situation where you need knowledge, wisdom, good judgment, clarity, rationality, good communication skills, clear communication, maybe leadership or organizational skills (you two don't necessarily have to be in a leadership role, but a person of this role can be present). Perhaps in circumstance where there is a sudden change, an unexpected task arises. It maybe include a light tower, but this is a bit special, of course this cannot apply to everyone, the image just flashed in front of me. Planning, re-planning/building (because of the Tower card), learning, discussion, consultation, teamwork, team building. Maybe, possible misunderstandings and doubts should be clarified, the fog should be dispelled with an objective view. Honest, open communication will be required.
Advice: What to focus your energy on in other areas of your life until you meet: Moon, Ace of Cups
Let yourself sink into the depths. The Moon gently asks you to examine your fears in the darkness surrounding you. It invites you to turn inward, do introspection and self-research. All feelings, traumas, ideas, picked-up or learned patterns that intimidate, unsettle and hold you back are hidden in this subconscious depth. Examine what is preventing you from welcoming love (back) into your life, be it romantic or of any kind. By uncovering these barriers in yourself, renewal and healing can begin, and you can open up again to the love that awaits you from both yourself, from the outside world, from your future soulmate. In the quiet retreat, you can prepare yourself for development, for moving on, rebuild your faith in a better future and fill your own cup before coming to the surface again.
To what extent are You ready to receive your soulmate? Reversed Six of Swords, Seven of Cups, Two of Swords, Temperance, The Fool
Dear Soul! You had to get yourself out of a difficult situation. You had a strong resistance to moving on. You may have been haunted by excessive caution, overburden, mistrust (even paranoia) in the past period. You lived in fear, and this internal struggle hindered your progress and development. There was confusion in you and around you. You were unsure of your possibilities, you couldn't determine what your true calling was, what would take you forward, what you could trust, and what was false or (self-)delusional. Maybe it only applies to a small percentage of you who chose the second picture, but maybe someone clouded your clarity with illusions and took away your confidence, maybe gaslighted you. You were confused and waiting for someone or something to rescue you from your hopelessness. You had to make a difficult decision. You needed to exclude all kinds of illusions and external influences, to silence the chaos and your fears in your thoughts in order to find your inner voice. You wanted to finally see clearly and continue your life more consciously. Over time, you overcame your difficulties, the hoped-for enlightenment arrived, you managed to make the decision and move on. The Sun is rising on the horizon for you, an ascension is coming in your life. You are relieved, you are on the road to recovery. Your outer and inner worlds are beginning to harmonize. After a thorough self-examination, you now see yourself more objectively and manage your emotions more consciously. In your bundle you carry your experiences and lessons with you, but you have left the past behind you, you do not let it continue to chain you down. The most important thing is that you are finally free. I wish that the new beginning fills your heart with hope and confidence, and that the knowledge of that you were able to overcome the difficulties gives you the strength to embark on the next, much happier phase of your life that awaits you.
To what extent are They ready to receive you? Four of Swords, Queen of Wands
It seems that your divine partner is resting after a difficult period too, consider things while they are healing (or just recently the healing phase is coming to an end for them). For them, the primary goal during this period is to regenerate and recharge their batteries. They must regain their strength and their love of life. First, they must warm up their own soul, so later, when your paths cross they can invigorate you with their pleasurable personality, and after that, as your relationship deepens, they can embrace you with their caring, devoted warmth. They need to gather courage and fix their self-confidence so that they can see the future more optimistically. It is necessary for them to turn inward now, they must process and understand their own emotions and what happened to them, so that later they can trust their intuition again, which will lead them to you.
What symbols and signs will indicate to you that your soulmate is nearby? King of Swords, Seven of Pentacles, Three of Pentacles
Sword, dagger Butterfly Crown Frog Flying bird(s) Pentagram, star a Ring (jewelry) what you maybe find in an unusual place or one that has one of the listed symbols on it Crescent moon Reaping hook Bunch of grapes Flowers for decoration/ornament/sticker, bouquet the color Blue can play a role
Where and under what circumstances will you meet? Ace of Cups
It seems like a place close to nature, near water, maybe next to a lake, where water lilies float on the water, or in a park, maybe by a fountain (perhaps with coins in it), in company of birds, where you can feed them. A sound of a small bell. I don't know where the jingle came from, but it has a nice, cheerful sound. Maybe you'll hear a similar sound when you meet eachother. You will meet at a time when you are both ready to accept new emotions, a new relationship, when you have reached the appropriate phase of self-care, practicing self-love, when you can give because you have taken care of filling your own cups.
Advice: What to focus your energy on in other areas of your life until you meet: Nine of Cups, Ace of Swords, Reversed Six of Cups, Strength
Take care of yourself, celebrate! Enjoy what you have achieved, reward yourself! Take advantage of the clearing of your thoughts. Let the new ideas and inspirations take you away. You can start to opening up to new communications, new acquaintances and opportunities. Sometimes you may even be filled with nostalgic feelings, which make you play with the idea: "Everything was good in the beginning." "Everything could be like that again." Please don't turn back! Avoid people with energy/vibe that reminds you of the old ones. Stay aware, leave the past in the past, don't nurture old things, ideas, relationships that you have already outgrown for your own benefit, that no longer serve you, they only drain your energy from your present and your future. Try to transform your experience into your strength. Nurture the inner strength to move forward, turn to yourself and your shadows with patience and understanding. Maybe you need to heal your inner child/teen, give yourself the care and love you need and desire. You have endless opportunities to grow and develop, you have the resources you need for further healing, and to tame and silence those shadow creatures that would encourage you to repeat old patterns. Hang in there for yourself, for your recovery.
To what extent are you ready to receive your soulmate? Queen of Wands, Reversed Hierophant, Ten of Cups, Reversed Eight of Wands, Reversed Moon
Dear Soul!
You are full of fire and passion. Confident, creative, intense, emotional, warm-hearted, devoted. You are aware of your values ââand you are looking for the king/queen in whom you can find an equal partner, who is strong enough to walk beside you, with whom you can create your own empire, like proud lions.
You long to experience all forms and heights of happiness, as well as the feeling of completeness and fulfillment, with a true, supportive partner.
You want this in such a form that you can keep your personal freedom and independence. You don't necessarily desire the bond of marriage in order to meet expected traditions and/or social expectations on paper. Perhaps you have already had a bad experience in the past, disappointment, breakup, divorce, a relationship that did not satisfy you spiritually and emotionally, where your soul could not soar.
Yet you would give your whole heart if you could find your soulmate, the ally with whom you could finally establish a home and live your life in abundance and overflowing love.
Yet there is something that holds you back, paralyzes you. There is an inner tension in you because you want to move forward, but you can't. Things around you are not going the way you want them to. Something always gets in the way, breaks your momentum, your sense of purpose. Whether there are obstacles in the physical world or internal obstacles that do not allow you to continue on the path to your soulmate, they also prevent you from fully opening up and becoming receptive to this attachment.
The voices of anxiety, fear, and uncertainty suppress your own inner voice, which would show you the way to your truer life. To unlock and release this inner barrier, you must turn inward, dive into the darkness, find the source of your fears, and examine it to see clearly. Just observe them in silence, if you let go of the struggle against them, accept their presence, the light of enlightenment may even reach you sooner. Maybe you need a quiet, meditative retreat to find your inner compass, the light of the Moon that illuminates the path you can follow.
To what extent are They ready to receive you? Eight of Cups, Reversed King of Wands, Reversed Three of Wands, Reversed Nine of Pentacles
Meanwhile, your soulmate also tries to move on with difficult feelings and to leave their past, everything that no longer serves them. A period ended for them, and they set out on a new path towards the unknown. There are several challenges ahead of them that they must overcome to reach the top of the mountain, but despite their doubts, a small inner flame drives them on.
For me, the Reversed King of Wands usually does not reveal excessive aggression, but rather a lack of self-confidence, battered confidence. I sense a restless energy from them, like from you.
They obsessively wants to accomplish, or stubbornly sticks to an idea, maybe thatâs why they don't listen to their intuition. Maybe that's why it's hard for them to adapt to their changed circumstances.
A new world opened up to them, but they not very optimistic about it. They doubt and hesitate, even though they have all the potential to take control of their life, they just need to rediscover that ability and determination within themself. They really need commitment now to start over. They need to examine their options with foresight, carefully plan their journey and prepare for it before making further decisions. They should not make decisions out of haste or thoughtlessness, and they maybe unwilling, but have to accept the intentions of others to help.
They strives for financial independence and longs for abundance so that they can give the best to their loved ones. They want a stable life where they don't depend on anyone and can enjoy the fruits of their hard work.
What symbols and signs will indicate to you that your soulmate is nearby? Page of Pentacles, Reversed Four of Cups
Pentagram, star
A specific Coin or Jewelry (maybe with one of the listed symbols on it)
Object of longing/admiration - what you get for yourself, or you find something you've been looking for, something you wanted to deal with, something you wanted to know more about, something you admire
Palm tree â (Eggsecutor jumped in my mind, maybe you or them are in the Pokemon fandom but not necessarily)
Unexpected gift/opportunity - You will find a new opportunity/offer that will shake you out of your dullness
Where and under what circumstances will you meet? Reversed Eight of Pentacles
I feel like there is a forced break in this situation. Restrictive circumstances or financial difficulties may play a role in work or study.
Like:
Job interview, job searching, go to employment office, work break, any kind of break in education, forced leave, slow administration/work, long line, long waiting, enrolling in a course, suspended/cancelled/missed/postponed event/course/workshop, unfinished business.
Advice: What to focus your energy on in other areas of your life until you meet: Knight of Wands, Reversed Five of Wands, Reversed Queen of Pentacles
You probably would not like to hear this, but; Patience, dear Soul. You really want this person who can make a difference in your life. You are bubbling with action, you are thirsty for new, exciting experiences, but in order to move away from the dead end, you need to channel your energies into a healthy channel. "Great excitement can also result in a stressful situation that prevents a well-considered decision and correct action." If you get carried away by the intensity, you can get involved in conflicts that don't move you forward, they just eat up your vitality. You need patience, persistence and sanity. It's worth avoiding or not taking stressful situations too seriously, rather use the power of your inner fire to overcome your own internal battles to get closer to what you really want to create. During this period, it is important to sort out restless energies to avoid burnout. Ground yourself, let the flames subside, rest for a while, seek stability. Itâs important to take care of your health. Take care of yourself, you need the right physical and mental nourishment to find your center. Think about what foods and nutrients you take in, pay attention to your body's signals. Try meditative activities/techniques that you like, seek contact with nature, be it a walk in the park or time spent with animals, do creative activities, anything what you feel that helps you to relax.
The reading is permeated by the energy of the number 888. A phase of both of your lives is coming to an end so that something much better can begin for you. Abundance and harmony is headed your way, just keep going. You have to prepare and go through some trials, but if you are committed and open to transformation, you will definitely get closer and closer to your desired goals and to each other.
#pick a pile#pick a card#pick a picture#pick a card reading#mine#tarot#tarot reading#tarot card reading#tarotblr#tarot journal#soulmate#divine partner#pac#pac tarot#pac reading
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an artist and his muse ââÂČ
pt1
artist! König x chubby!F!reader
!!content warnings: König is younger than canon, pistol mentioning, idk this is just fluff. Chubby reader. Extensive description of how to make a condensed milk cake. Maybe a bit out of character.
3,7k words â English isn't my first language, i apologize for any mistakes.
Since that day, you and König have been talking practically every day through the cellphone, König would often talk about his day and his new projects, sending you photos of the new paintings he was working on and recently, he started a new hobby: learn digital art. He would send you screenshots of his drawings, they were... Certainly something, it wasn't as great because he was used to work on a canvas with paint and such but, he was trying at least.
If he disappeared for 3-4 hours, you were sure he was just working on whatever his mind was thinking of, painting, digital art or even ceramic, yeah, he also started ceramic. He was trying to occupy his mind with something and it was obvious... You just didn't know he was trying to occupy his brain because you were everything in his mind.
König was having trouble painting because he couldn't focus on anything but you, his happiness was texting you everyday and looking at the selfies you send him anytime you were doing something mildly interesting, watching a movie, cooking, baking, oh god, baking, he could kill someone to taste those brownies you baked practically every weekend. He really wanted to ask you out on a date but he didn't have the guts to, you were such a pretty girl, who was he to think he had a chance with such a beautiful girl?
On your side... Well, it was the same. You were too shy to ask him out on a date, he was such a busy guy, he was painting and when he wasn't painting he was training his digital art and when he wasn't training he was doing ceramic, you didn't want to bother him. Your heart skips a beat every time he sends a photo of what he was working on, his face wasn't even on the photos but you were so in love it didn't even take too much to make you kick your feet and smile like a fool...
"Who are you talking to?" Suddenly, your father kicked you out of your thoughts, he was frowning and trying to peek on your phone as you were eating. You were already an adult but old habits never die to your father.
"M...my friend, his name is König." You reply, showing him the conversation, Anton takes a look and nods. "Your boyfriend?" He asks, you blushes slightly and shakes your head, "N-no, he's just a friend." You stutter. He gives you a look like 'yeah, sure' and then goes back to the living room, leaving you in the kitchen to finish your lunch.
You didn't have anything to do that day. You wanted to go out with your friends but they were all busy, you didn't have a photoshoot today, no modeling or something, so you would just enjoy the day, just being lazy... So you decided to bake a cake! Why not?
You looked for a recipe on the internet and found one you found interesting, 'Condensed Milk Cake'... Hmm, sounds good! And you have all the ingredients, luckily.
You grab the apron that was probably too old for its own good and protect your hair and start making the cake, it was therapeutic. In a large bowl, you pour the condensed milk, whisk in butter and the vanilla extract, over the bowl, sift four and the baking powder over the condenser milk mixture. After that, you grab the rice cooker, grease the interior with butter and pour in the batter, spreading it evenly in the rice cooker, you decide to top with some chocolate chips, put the cover on and cook for 20 minutes. After waiting, you pick a toothpick and poke the cake, it comes out clean so it means it is ready! You place a plate on top of the rice cooker pot and carefully invert. The scent of vanilla and condensed milk infested the kitchen. It was so good, you were proud of yourself, it looked delicious!
Your father walks in the kitchen, "What are you doing?" He asks, frowning slightly before he sees the cake, "Oooh, it looks good. Gimme a slice." He picks a knife and goes to cut the cake but oh no, your father didn't have the reputation of being the best cake cutter.
"Waaaaait!" You shouts, trying to stop him but your father was a man on a mission. He cuts a huge part out of the cake and walks away, you can practically see the evil smile on his face as he goes to his room, leaving you with less than a half of the cake... Goddamnit.
You sigh and decide to take a photo of the... Half cake you have, you grab your phone and try to get the best angle of it but yeah, a cake cut in half wasn't the most aesthetically pleasing thing ever.
Eating a slice of the cake while watching something was a pleasing experience at least, watching some old humoristic sitcom your father had on DVD since the 90s that he refused to get rid of was nice at best. You hear a notification coming from your phone and check it... It was König!
'Hallo, are you free tonight? I would be pleased to have dinner with you.'
You found it amusing how he always wrote it grammatically correctly, you could've never, sometimes you just forget how to write some words.
'Yeah, I'm free! Where do u wanna meet?'
'Meet me at the park, I am going to take you to the restaurant from there, at 7pm. Don't be late.'
You smile, he was always so assertive and direct sometimes, it was nice though, at least he wasn't confused about what he wanted and treated you well.
You start getting ready at 5pm, showering, doing your makeup, choosing the best clothing, fixing your hair, airdrying it and, oh god it's already 6:56pm! You run out of the house, forgetting to bring your lip oil.
You go to the park and look around for König, it was 7:04pm. You feel a cold hand on your shoulder, looking over your shoulder...
"Oh, hi Kö! How are you?" It was König! He didn't seem mad at you, good. He smiles and gives you a little pat on the head.
"I'm fine. Let's go to my car." Simple as ever. He takes your hand and leads you to the car, opening the car door for you. You two make small talk in the car on the way to the restaurant. He was wearing some nice clothes, a white button shirt that was rolled up to his elbow, black tailored pants with a belt and black shoes. It was minimalistic and he looked good on it. You could see some scars on his arms, that was interesting, maybe he wasn't always an artist.
The restaurant was nice, had a warm atmosphere and some relaxing jazz music playing. You order some alfredo pasta and chicken with some orange juice, he orders steak with onion, rice, salad, some rustic potatoes and... You lost track of the list after that, he was a bottomless pit. Oh, he ordered some apple juice for himself too.
"So, what do you like to do in your free time? When you're not doing paintings and such." You were the one to start the conversation, noticing that Konig was more of the quiet type and that, depending on him, the date would be mostly silence and eating.
"I enjoy... Uh... I enjoy television shows, I watch it when I'm... I'm not doing art..." He stuttered, not looking at you directly, you noticed that he was very nervous, his hands shaking, it was very different from the man you met before. Maybe you were starting to get under his shell.
Your soft smiles didn't help much. His mind was going a mile a second, his hand shaking and his body couldn't relax, he felt like everyone was staring at him, why wouldn't they? He's on a date with a cute girl while he looks like this giant freak, you probably don't even like him, you're just with him because you pity him youcangetsometingbetterthanhimyouâ
"König?" Your soft voice slaps him out of his trance, his eyes focusing on your worried expression, "Are you okay? You seem... I don't knowâ" "I'm fine." He cuts you off, his hands still fidgeting underneath the table.
You were a bit confused and even a little shocked. He was so serious, confident before and now he's shaking like a wet cat. Well, he's trying to hide it but it's obvious, someone his size can't hide. You decide it's best to let him relax, stay silent for a while, let him recompose.
Well... His brain was going miles an hour, waiting for YOU to say something, to talk about something YOU like, maybe you could even forget he's there and just ramble away his anxiety... But that doesn't happen. He's waiting for you to talk and you're waiting for him to speak. Both so awkward, his anxious behavior getting into you, where you are scaring him? Why? What have you done? Did you do something that made him uncomfortable? Doeshenotlikeyouanymore-
Then, the waiter arrives after what felt not even a second, you swear you had just ordered not even 10 minutes ago. The waiter places your order in front of him and two of König's extensive list of food, the potatoes and the beef. The orange juice being placed in the middle for the both of you.
He awkwardly starts cutting his beef, the cutlery was so small in his hands that it made a task as simple as cutting a steak difficult. You eat your pasta, staring at nowhere as your mind is non stop thinking that you did something wrong. You both reached for the orange juice glass, his fingers touching yours before he flinched his hand away, just reassuring that he was scared of you on your worried brain.
The rest of the date was... Not cozy, just two looked like two pathetic wet cats that didn't know where their mama went and was scared of the world. He pays for everything, even if you insisted that you had money. You two step out of the restaurant, some significant distance from each other, and just... Staying there, waiting for the one another to say something.
"Look-" "I'm sorry-" You two speak up at the same time, eyes meeting in an anxious atmosphere, silence remains for a few seconds. "Hear-" "I apologize-" Interrupting one another again, the atmosphere getting tenser and tenser, you both take a deep breath, taking a step closer to each other. He let you talk first.
"I'm sorry, I'm not aware of what I did but I apologize for making you uncomfortable." You speak up, playing with the hem of your clothes as you try to sound not nervous.
He frowns slightly before sighing and nodding, "I'm the problem. You're not the problem, I've always been this... Social awkward, since I was a teenager. It's not your fault." He reassures, taking a step closer... Closer... Closer until he's right in front of you. He looks at you... "It's going to snow, you should go home." Before he lifts your chin and gives you a forehead kiss...
Then he turns around and walks away, you don't know that but he's panicking inside, his hands shaking and his heart beating like a drum, his face red as a tomato... That man saw you naked and is flustered because he gave you a forehead kiss! Men...
Well, you were blushing too, your mouth opened slightly in shock... The snow starts to fall, the cold feeling makes you feel even hotter inside, it has just started. You didn't know what to do so you do the same as him, you turn around and walk home... No, you can't do that. You stop in your tracks, turn back and start running towards him.
"König!" You shouts, making him stop and turn to see you. You don't know what you're doing and why but you feel like you need to do this. You reach him, panting, you weren't used to exercising. "I'm- I'm-" "You don't need to be sorry, it's okay." He cuts you off.
"No, that's not it, I-i... I-" You look up at him and you just... Can't finish your phrase, he's so handsome your heart beats and your brain stops.
He smiles softly and ruffles your already messy hair, "You shouldn't stay outside, you're gonna catch a cold... Wanna go to my place?" He speaks up, and honestly, he's being too damn bold, his heart feels like it's gonna explode out of his chest, he's trying to keep this cool guy persona but... That's not him.
You definitely didn't want to freeze outside so... "Y-yeah, sure." You nod. He takes your hand and starts walking to his car. This all feels too... Unbelievable... Damn, you're going to a guy's house after the first date? What are you? You silently judge yourself but König isn't like other guys... You hope.
The car ride back to his place was silent, some random song in German playing on the radio. His car was fine, definitely not the best or the most expensive but also not the cheapest, it was a nice car that had the necessary to live. When arriving at his place, the snow was already filling the streets with its soft whiteness, he opens the door and gets inside after you. The place was... Nice? It was a bit messy but it was comfortable.
"Make yourself at home. The TV has a little sound problem but nothing that will bother you, I'm going to take a shower, there's a few snacks in the drawers in the kitchen if you feel hungry." He welcomes you, giving you a faint smile before going to his bedroom.
You look around... Should you explore? Yeah, why not? As soon as the shower starts, you begin to wander around the house. The drawers were filled with snacks and the fridge with water, milk and egg... Nothing else. How did this man lived? Whatever. You go to the living room and turns on the TV, putting on your favorite show, yeah, the sound definitely has a problem but your ears would probably get used to it, it was some sort of faint static it could be heard on the background but whatever. As you wander through the house, the drawer closes to the door catches your eye, you open it and... A pistol and a dog tag. Your eyes widen slightly but then you frown, you take the dog tag and before you can read anything in it, a hand rips the dog tag from yours, your heart falls, your face going pale.
You gulped and looked at König, his face was dark, his eyes filled with disappointment, your eyes immediately went back to the drawer, not wanting to look at him, your hands shaking. He sighs and throws the dog tag back in the drawer and closes it. "Forgot to lock it."
You two stay silent for a while, before you murmur an "Sorry." Nervously. He shakes his head, "Don't be. It's okay to be curious... Just don't do it again." His voice was deep and dark, like if he was giving an order...
"... I'm gonna order some pizza. We can watch a movie, c'mon." He tries to sound more excited as he pulls you by the waist, leading you to the couch. You were still shocked, but trying to relax as you do breathing exercises. He tried to make small talk but you were still thinking about the pistol and the dog tag...
The pizza arrives not long after, he picks it up and goes back to the couch, placing the pizza on top of the living room mini table and putting on some movie on Netflix.
The silence was uncomfortable, the pizza munching sounds not helping. After half an hour, he pauses the movie and looks at you. "I have to explain something to you." He says in a serious tone. You look back at him and gulps, nodding.
He takes a deep breath, "I used to be a soldier, a lieutenant. I was in the army from 17 to 29, almost 30. I retired earlier because of my mental health, it was killing me from the inside." He puts his hand on his chest, "I had no choice. I've done a lot of things that shouldn't have been done and I regret it with my heart."
"You're... A war criminal...?" You ask, the tone quiet and uncertain. He shakes his head, "No... No, not that I'm aware at least." He chuckles nervously, looking away, "I've... Killed a lot of men. My hands are filled with blood... But I've never wanted it, I never wanted to be a soldier, to kill people. I've always loved art, and I'm doing what I want, what I love now and I can't escape my past, it doesn't matter where I go. My soldier self is part of me, I can't get away from it." He vents, his tone getting sadder and more self aware.
You nod, taking a breath and sighing, "I don't know how it feels, how it is to have such a hard backstory... Are you in therapy at least?" You ask and he nods, "I take meds.. I don't want to talk about it."
Nodding, you sigh, "I understand... I'm sorry for sneaking in your things, I shouldn't have done that." You clench your fists and look at your lap, feeling trapped, disappointed at yourself... Until, he takes your chin and lifts your face to look at him. "It's okay." He says, softer, making your heart beat faster. He gets closer... Closer... Closer, until your lips touch his. You immediately kissed him back, wrapping your arms around his neck. He smiles on the kiss and takes you closer by your waist until your legs are on his lap. The kiss is soft, like a make-up kiss, warm.
You were the one to break the kiss, your eyes meeting his... And he panics, "Oh verdammtâ es tut mir leidâ I'm sorry, you're just so pretty and I'm so awkward, I'm-" He freaks out, immediately taking his hands out of your waist. You smile and giggle.
"It's okay, I liked it." You take him by the cheek, making him look at you. "You- you did?" He asks, not believing you. You nod and smile, "Yeah." "Y-yeah?" "Hell yeah!" You giggles and kisses him, you taking the lead now. This one was much more playful than intense as the last one, you break the kiss a few times because you were giggling and he starts giggling too. He pulls you closer as he lays down on the couch, you getting on top of him. You two start laughing, apparently for no reason at all.
After relaxing, you two just cuddled, he was warm and you even warmer due to your weight. It was comfortable and the closeness was making the heart of the both of you relax. Him giving you forehead kisses from time to time. "Hey... You wanna sleep here?" He asks and you nod, "Sure, why not."
The night falls and you were used to showering before sleeping and you definitely needed one... But you had no clothes to wear! He was okay with sharing the bed with you and you didn't want to smell bad. So you asked for some of his clothes, he at first laughed but then gave you a shirt and some boxers.
For some reason, the water of his shower was freezing cold and had no heating option, so poor you. His shirt was bigger than your, that was rare, that never happened with your exes, it was nice to now have someone that was bigger than you, it makes your heart warm... and the boxers a bit loose but fitted better than the shirt, you put your hair on a bun with a satin scrunchie and go to lay with him. The heater was on so that was nice. "Goodnight." You tell him before he turns off the lights and lays next to him.
..."Can we cuddle? You're warm and I like your weight on top of me..." He asks a bit shyly, your heart beating faster. You look at him and nod, snuggling closer to him, he pulls you closer, getting you slightly on top of him. "Goodnight." "Night..." And you both fall asleep.
When you woke up he was already up. You stretch and yawn, going to the kitchen after fixing your hair (or trying) and he was already there, eating his breakfast. His eyes light up as he sees you, "Morning. I made breakfast! Eat!" He says, sounding excited. You smile and join him, it wasn't the best but it was good enough.
You two spend the afternoon together, watching movies, chatting, playing in the snow. At night, you were ready to go home. He drives you to your place, and in the door, he kisses you goodbye.
You get in the house, very happily, smiling widely and your father notices, he smirks. "Just a friend, uh?" He teases and you chuckle. "Boyfriend now, dad." You correct him playfully and he rolls his eyes.
"I knew it.â
Sorry, this took too long!! I was in a creativity block and didn't know what to do but i hope this is fun to read!!! Love yall, stay safe, xoxo from Kel. Feel free to send me asks!
#cod x reader#call of duty#cod#fluff#könig#könig x reader#konig x reader#könig cod#konig fanfiction#konig#konig fanfic#König fanfic#konig call of duty#konig x you#konig cod#konig mw2#konig x chubby reader#konig x y/n#cod x you#cod x y/n#cod x chubby reader
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hi so i was hoping for like a gut check on this because maybe it's weird and if it is i want to stop.
so im trans and autistic, and because of that im a little behind on understanding masturbation and my body. ive been trying to read up on it and im trying to learn how to masturbate. one of my friends and i were talking about it, and he asked to see some of the webpages i was looking at (shoutout to you and planned parenthood). but we were looking through them and one of the links went to scarleteen.
and he said it was weird and kind of perverted because im an adult (24) and thats for teenagers. i said that i thought it was okay because its not like im interacting with teenagers and theyre pretty good for teaching me i thought because i like the clear writing and the easier words and also its just a webpage. but the more i think about it the more freaked out i get. like scarleteens one of them and also teen vogue and some other ones because those are just what come up a lot of the time for learning more.
so what do you think? is it bad? because my friend and i ended up not sure. but if its bad i'll stop i dont want to hurt anyone.
Hello! Let me see if I can help.
So, there's nothing wrong with using resources designed for children when you're an adult, for the most part.
You're not taking resources from children or even interacting with children [though that's not even necessarily an immediate issue, depending on the situation], you're just using an accessible website with a lot of information on things you might've missed.
It can be very hard to find websites with accessible language, especially when you're new to a subject and there should be no shame in using something designed for people younger than you if it's helpful and its not hurting anyone.
I don't quite understand where your friend is coming from, to be honest. Using "perverted" and "weird", both harsh terms for something harmless, to describe this doesn't really make sense to me.
But I understand that it's upset you, understandably! So let me be clear:
No, there's nothing wrong with what you're doing. Using Scarleteen and websites like Teen Vogue are both perfectly fine, regardless of your age. They're targeted towards children, but children aren't the only ones who can use them.
It absolutely hurts no one for you to read their articles and learn. In fact, it's a good thing you're learning from these websites and showing them to other people you know. That only helps websites like that.
It's not bad in the least, Anon. I'd encourage you to keep using them, especially if they're helping you learn easily. That's literally awesome! [I'm honored to be among those you're learning from! <3]
Hope this helps! Let me know if you have any other questions. <3
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An Ode to the love and grief in Arcane: an open letter from a fan who survived genocide
(English is my third language)
I was able to flee Khartoum after the first bomb on April 2023, despite being injured, and carrying my disabled sister and trying to keep my sick grandmother safe.
Arcane is so special to my heart and I want to share what I felt watching it.
As I saw some fans feeling disappointed/sad over some plot choices. And by no means I'm saying those opinions/critiques are not valid, nor do I think it shouldn't have been more worked on.
But maybe a chance to see this show through different lenses
Ofc spoilers for S2
"Peace can't be accomplished without sacrifices, For the Prophet has to lose what he dearest loves."
After finishing the last act, I want to say that what the fandom is seekingâbesides more timeâis a deeper understanding of real life. For people who grew up in similar circumstancesâthrough wars, famines, fear, loss, pain, hope, and griefâyou learn that many questions are left unanswered. Many people will have to be forgiven, many lives mourned and forgotten, and yet only one or two individuals might live to carry those memories forward.
What I sense from many discussions about the finale is that peopleâespecially in the Westâneed to see this story as one that reflects the complexities of real life. The emotions you feel for these characters were, and are, experienced by real people somewhere, somehow. Instead of feeling ashamed or sad, reach out to those around youâthose like usâand ask how they are feeling. It will give you new perspectives on many things.
Even in your own life, this is a great chance to try to understand your heart and soul, beyond the skin limitations
Characters like Ekko, Vi, Jinx, Caitlyn, and Isha didnât have the time or opportunity to heal everything. Those who survived will have to carry their grief, celebrate their victories, and learn to love themselves within this new version of reality, even if it feels fractured.
So yes, youâre not going crazy for feeling that there are gaps in the story. Trauma, pain, grief, and leadership are inherently imperfect. As weâve all come to realize, nothing good comes from expecting a perfect world.
#arcane#arcane spoilers#arcane 2 spoilers#i cried so hard for so many times#sudan genocide#league of legends#ekko arcane#vi arcane#jinx arcane#caitlyn kiramman#isha arcane
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I always seem to think the best while I'm at work or it's 3 in the fucking morning.
Killer but he wants a new name and the Stages but they want their own names too. Probably wouldn't happen but there's always a slim chance they'd explore the notion far into the future of love and safety and where they learn to cut themselves some slack.
They probably would still collectively go by Killer, but have a list of names and nicknames along with it, like K, Kay, Kat, Strawberry, Krill, something related to a comfort of his or just a name he happens to like or finds funny.
But each Stage separately might still subscribe to the numbers pattern of names, particularly Stage 2 because that's my favorite motherfucker right now. Maybe he just likes being called Two in many languages, Dos being his most favorite.
Stage 3 I don't think would care about the names thing, but surprisingly Stage 4 is receptive to words in morse code in which it can communicate nonverbally and while it doesn't assign itself a name preference, perhaps it ends every message with a particular pattern or signal. It could be a vague sign it likes the look of or maybe a tune or specific sound.
Stage 1 would be the most indecisive of if they even want a name change or just another name seeing as they carry the bulk of the guilt for their past and have to fight themself to stop looking for punishments, death, or isolation. But if I look through this with the angelkin!Killer lens, perhaps he'd like something with a theme related to that (can't think of specific examples) or maybe a gemstone like Onyx or Ruby (playing off of dragonkin!Color's attachment to shiny priceless things)
-- Sarco
#Sarco Screams#killer!sans#killersans#killer sans#utmv headcanons#utmv hc#something new at#killertale#something new sans#stage 1 killer#stage 1!killer#stage 2 killer#stage 2!killer#stage 3 killer#stage 3!killer#stage 4 killer#stage 4!killer#plural killer#OSDD-2 killer#system killer#angelkin!killer#angelkin killer!sans#angelkin killer#dragonkin!color#dragonkin color!sans#dragonkin color#color!sans#colorsans#color sans#othertale
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Today English has forgotten it is my first language...this is tragic
#miranda yaps àŒ*·Ë#today i guess my brain wants to speak spanish#or french#or latin#or maybe it wants to learn a new language
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I re-read all of the stuff in the Luke's Student Tags after that ask and Zheff is my fave but I wondered if, after Luke got Dar'shana to run interference with Threepio, the two of them are besties.
It makes my little autistic heart happy to think of the two of them chatting away about everything.
omg yes!!! once threepio gets used to her questioning he probably becomes her favourite conversation partner
#also glad you like zheff sm!!! i've neglected him a bit i'll draw him more#maybe dara can learn new languages w threepio (totally for jedi diplomacy reasons and not just bc she wants to)#thanks for the ask!
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today on random languages my brain is going đ at is biblical hebrew and biblical greek
#the following tags will have discussions of my faith and christianity in general so if you're not interested in that then stop reading ig#some lore: in my early teens i did consider doing a theology degree at uni and becoming an ordained minister/taking a role in the church#this was before i found out a) in my denomination only men can be ministers (deaconesses exist but yeah) and b) the church as an institutio#is pretty yikes#and then finding out i'm queer and nonbinary threw other spanners in there but despite it all my faith is still so so important to me#i want to start learning about christian/comparative theology more broadly to understand both my own faith and others' better#idk why but today i randomly ended up on the webpage for the theological college in NI and was just looking through the courses they offer#maybe someday in the distant future i'll have the money and time to burn to do an online postgrad degree with them#but yeah they have a postgrad certificate in biblical greek đ which looked v cool#the internet is a wonderful place and i found a pretty comprehensive looking biblical hebrew course on youtube and i'd probs be able to fin#biblical greek somewhere if i looked hard enough#greek and hebrew are both such linguistically interesting languages and being able to read some would also help in my theological adventure#so new side quest just dropped ig? at least it's my reading week this week so I can dabble in them with no consequences#i've also been wanting to try and learn a language via an immersion focus - obvs can't do full immersion with biblical greek and hebrew but#yeah using a less grammar and vocab focused approach than i'm used to#i have access to digital bibles so i could just choose a v literal english translation and then try and parse what's happening?#yeah we'll see#langblr#ellis exclaims
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okay obviously hau cheng is like prime character to be covered in tattoos but have we considered xie lian with tattoos??? Because I cannot stop thinking about it
#heaven official's blessing#Tgcf#Hua cheng#Xie lian#Tattoos#Hua cheng obviously has his xie lian tattoo but#I think that's it just the one#Or alternatively xie lians name in every language of where he's looked for his god#Xie lian though post Canon who has never been able to keep any scar ever who's body looks exactly like it did at 17#Xie lian who's never had proof of all he's suffered except for his memories#Xie lian who's never felt safer than when he's surrounded by hua cheng xie lian who loves his husband's art#Asks for a tattoo asks his San Lang to do it#And it takes time to make ink that'll stay but if hua cheng has to invent new ink for his husband's happiness than it's easy#And once xie lian has one? He loves it he never wants to stop his body quickly fills with his husband's ink#Idk what tattoos xie lian has but maybe some sort of tribal band around his neck? Or a band of butterflies đ#A Phoenix? A dragon? All the moments he met San Lang?#Ohhh a big one over his back of a child falling and then the child growing and catching him#The flowers hua cheng use to give him around his ankle#A series down his thigh that use to be his mother's favorites#I think Feng xin would hate it at first until xie lian explained and then he'd just be sad about it#Mu Qing is.....complicated like always#Lang qiunqui....is NOT curious he doesn't want one he isn't dying to know if xie lian has one of his time as his teacher or not#Eventually he asks xie lian if hua cheng will give him one as well and the answer is of course no but maybe....#....xie lian learns how to give tattoos đ the idea is surprisingly popular with the gods
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randomly decided to learn norwegian on duolingo. weâll see how it goes
#iâve been learning italian for a while in school and on duolingo#but i stopped taking it in school and then when i got sick at the end of july i stopped doing duolingo#and now i didnât want to go back but i was thinking maybe learning a new non romance language might be fun#also not having learned it in school helps bc i can take my time and do it at my own pace#iâm really trying to become interested in different languages again bc school rly messed me up with that#also might be able to talk to my step grandma in norwegian which could be cool
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starting teaching again means i'm very in my feels and thoughts about my nonverbal ocs. Momoki being a well known twitch streamer who notably never talks. Communicates entirely in facial expressions. Occasionally streams with his moirail who reads him better than anyone. Dia struggling to finish sentences when asked about serious things, when he's not able to crack jokes. Lockjaw finding it easier to use adapted sign language and writing than to use the digital voice he was given.
Nonverbal ocs with communication devices. Using images and writing. Not always using sign language, but sometimes learning bits and pieces.
#i had fun on friday but it was an INSANE struggle?#new classes mean they dont know how i speak yet#my kids from last year picked up really quick. sometimes mr l just stops mid sentence and you gotta finish for him#sometimes mr l chokes up. sometimes he uses his computer to say the words. sometimes he only responds in facial expressions.#my heart hurts with how much i miss those kids.#i had kids in every class who picked up instantly and could finish my thoughts when i struggled.#and the new ones will learn!#and i will once again get over my guilt of being disabled in front of them because it shows them disabled people doing jobs they may want.#maybe i could incorporate some sign language into my classroom#universal sign for 'mr l cant talk rn'
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that post about which language youd like to be fluent in persuaded me to finally buy a coursebook for arabic :D
#i wanted to do a course but there's no course starting parallel to semester start#so it's book and audio learning first and then course next semester maybe#either that or chinese course if my bf wants to come along#honestly pumped to learn a new language
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I'm still grieving the dreams I lost due to my disability and I just added another one
#ones id already lost: wanting to hold any job at all. wanting to be a doctor. wanting to be a gymnast. wanting to play bass#wanting to be a therapist (maybe still possible? this is due to my inability to hold any job but im still hopeful i may be able to do this)#i wanted to go to school... i can still learn things of course but its harder and there's no community#i wanted to learn everything. everything about plants and animals and quantum mechanics and languages#everything about history and culture and sciences. but i can't. i mean that was never a realistic goal of course#but I cant get as close to it now as i wouldve if i was healthy#the one i recently added is discovering my fingers have deteriorated so much that playing keyboard is nearly impossible#thats been a lifelong dream of mine... even drawing hurts unless i draw with my finger. i cant hold a pencil without pain#like im figuring things out. working through accommodations and making new goals#but that grief is still there and the wound is still fresh and sometimes it just feels like its growing and it will never stop#i need too much that i cant have. I have so few options#i really dont know what kind of future there is for me if my pain and disability is already this bad in my 20s
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standing here in my star-patterned bathrobe holding a stylus while inscribing something onto my computer. it's wizard time baby
#just me hi#my mom came into the room n saw me doing all that + starting laughing and saying 'you look like a wizard' so i have achieved the Pinnacle#of my existence hhvsbhhfsv#my n my starry bathrobe on our way to cast spells (writing in a language no one can understand (regular handwriting) and portraying strange#otherworldly begins (drawing wet cat OCs))#/i should draw this though because it Is kind of silly now that i think about it#i'm a wizard >:3 my potions are store-bought and taste like cherry dr perpper and my spells are free from my brain#my runes? uhhh have you ever heard of drawing warmups ??#i lay out simple curses and it's words that make no sense and characters i actually talk about in secret like a little troll forgetting#other people can hear it Hfbhsv#my tower is whatever i'm standing on at the moment. which is a kneeling pad rn Lol :3#//which btw kneeling pads are Awesome for nearly everything#Except for sitting because everything will still hurt and maybe More than it did before Lmaooo#but like after a bit of standing it Sucks standing up and the kneeling pad is really good at helping me redistribute the weight doing that#ik it's better to stand than to sit but dude it blows so much harder hfhsbvhf#i am taking damage on all sides and with nearly every method but oh!! i will find a proper system well enough !!!#//anyway i think i want to get a wizard hat now lol :3#maybe a blue one!! i like blue :>>#//yea though i'm almost done with this ref!! !!!!#love it when things go smoothly. wheeee :D#i gotta add a couple things and then colour + shade + effects cuz i'll Die without my effects hfvbsh#really i learned how to do that little glitch thing and now i just can't go back lol :>#trying out new ways + new layer settings all the time so ~!~#//but YEA gonna get to that and then other things and stuffs!! you know :3#so tooooodles ~+~ !!
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