#or maybe I'll forget about it for several months

[dunmeshistash]

Almost forgot about the poll

Y'all afraid of shellfish and bunnies smh (jk)

The results are pretty interesting, I didn't expect so many people to chose Mimic on the second poll, and I guess arachnophobia got the huge spider a lot of votes? Fun!

[jiminrings]

four seven eight, phase 3 (1)

pairing: jungkook x reader

wordcount: 9k

glimpse: jungkook's secure when it comes to being a husband and a dad, knowing that he grew to love being both after everything you've been through. what he isn't so secure about is the possibility that it's everything he'll ever be.

alternatively, jungkook pursues his dream of making a film, even if it means making your rival his main lead behind your back.

[ part one, intermission, part two, intermission 02, finale — complete series masterlist, from phase 1 to 3 ]

[ the return of 478jk (derogatory), major angst, fluff, the weight of devotion except jk's mean this time, flashbacks to phase 1 (im so sorry), the both of them r in an identity crisis, The Return of yoongi, yearning and the ache of unfulfillment all over, eventual redemption ]

notes: FINALLYYYYYY after a long wait, phase three is finally here :-) the og era of 478 is a time i'll truly never forget so now that i'm putting them in Several Inconveniences again, i look forward to creating another era with u citizens!!! mwah thank u love yew

as always, lmk what you think <3 send in feedback n love to my askbox anytime!!

Jungkook likes to be needed.

He likes to be needed fully, sometimes even all at once to the point that every mention of his name makes him think that his assistance is needed. He wants to be needed like the way you rummage through your old film canisters that you dumped in a large drawer just to retrieve a specific picture of him; needed like the way you sigh in relief when you find said roll.

Jungkook wants you to seek him in a crowd, past all the banners of your name from your fans and lanyards of your staff, and ask specifically him for a cold water bottle he keeps in his bag for you. As a matter of fact, he wouldn’t even mind if you ask it from him indiscreetly — he wants to be needed, even if neither of you are alone with each other.

He’s used to the feeling of being needed because it’s practically routine for him. The way Jungkook loves you has changed and evolved (needlessly to say for the better) through the years, and although he tries to look for the balance in it all, there’s a tiny, tiny part of him that wonders what would’ve happened if neither of you changed.

It’s perhaps the change in seasons, or maybe it’s the build-up of the stupid little things Jungkook’s seen recently; one of those things happen to be a ridiculously long thread by your fan, who happens to also be a fan of Yoongi, assuming that your marriage with J*ngkook (that’s exactly how they typed his name out) is ending, hence your recent collaboration on a brand deal. Jungkook, of course, has half the mind to go on his secret stan account and snark at said poster before reporting, but even then, there’s an itch in his mind that he can’t scratch.

Whatever weather it is outside nowadays or whichever stupid little thing pisses him off online, Jungkook can’t shake off the nagging question of what if in his mind.

When Jungkook cleans your water bottle every night for you to take to set the next day, he wonders if the two of you would still be together if only he didn’t rush to your place by the exact second your month-long break ended, right when he takes off the rubber from the cap to clean the ridges thoroughly.

When he blowdries your hair (even if you tell him not to bother) after you begrudgingly take a shower because you can’t sleep in bed after going outside and not washing up the second you come home, he wonders if you would’ve kept loving him even if the very incident with Sora didn’t push him to change, right when he sees you close your eyes while his hands scratch your scalp.

When Jungkook sounds out syllables to Hwayoung and tries his very best not to baby-talk her (he can’t help it sometimes) as he recounts his day to the toddler, he wonders if you would’ve even had a daughter with him if he stayed the same silent lover that he used to be, right when she parrots your name back to him with a smile.

“Young-ie’s probably starting to need me less and less,” he sighs to you with a pout, eyebrows knitted in concern as he gives you his rookie version of a blowout he’s still trying to perfect. Jungkook can’t flick his wrist the way professional hairstylists do, just in the same way you can’t pick up why he’s brought up the thought out of nowhere.

“How could you say that? She’s the biggest daddy’s girl ever,” you chuckle, placating him with the truth despite your initial confusion. If you weren’t fully awake awhile ago, you certainly are now — mostly because Jungkook springs up an unbelievable idea, and partly because whenever he tugs the brush at your hair, your whole head comes along with it.

“Not really. More like biggest mommy’s girl, you mean,” he defensively scoffs, apologizing quickly when he hears you wince at a particular experimental tug he does on your ends.

“Should we wake her up right now and let her decide?” you murmur, your eyes locking with his on the mirror.

Jungkook, at his most comfortable state, wearing ratty oversized pajamas and glasses on his face that he’s yet to update the prescription on, has never felt more competitive in his life.

“Well we could-…”

“I was joking,” you deadpan, the silence between the two of you getting long enough to the point that you suddenly find yourself laughing, effectively getting Jungkook out of his daze.

“… I knew that.”

You may have had an inkling about Jungkook feeling slightly off before in the past weeks, but all it took was his random, unprompted question tonight for you to solidify that seed of concern in your chest.

Jungkook likes to be needed, even if he can’t say the same that you need him as much as he thinks you do. He thinks it’s a perfectly rational feeling to want to be needed by both your wife and your daughter, and although he’s not as receptive to being needed as much by anyone other than his family, the feeling still stays the same.

He has all the time in the world. You’ve enabled him to do so even if he’s the one mainly looking after Hwayoung while you worked, but despite that, Jungkook doesn’t feel needed enough.

There’s an itch in his mind that he can’t scratch with neither your constant affection nor Hwayoung’s grabby hands. There’s an unplaceable, agitating urge in Jungkook’s chest to put a pause on everything and be back to who and what he used to be, despite your affirmation that he is needed.

There’s that tick going on in Jungkook’s brain that amplifies everything he does to seem wrong; that makes him grumpy when he wakes up to prepare you breakfast whenever you had early shoots, that makes him purse his lips when his daughter asks him to watch the same movie with her for the third time in the week.

All of the uneasiness in him, however, disappears when Namjoon, the acclaimed screenwriter that he has for a friend (whom he actually met through you), calls him up with an offer that Jungkook can’t refuse.

It’s an offer that releases the ache from his bones, makes him want to blowdry your hair better, and watch the same movie over and over again with his daughter — but Jungkook postpones saying it to you when you come home and want nothing more than to be in his arms, and for Hwayoung to be in yours.

( ♡ )

Jungkook could wait more.

He convinces himself that he can because although there’s a date set for the short film that Namjoon’s pitched for him to produce, it hasn’t grown yet to become the unstoppable force against Jungkook’s immovable object: family.

He knows he needs to tell you eventually and that he’s not really asking for permission in the first place, but there’s a sense of guilt in him whenever the thought of breaking the news to you comes into mind. He’s not nervous per se because he knows you’re as supportive of him, if not more, like he is with you.

It just happens that it’s within the fine details that Jungkook truly feels hesitant to tell you that he has to leave for awhile.

Jungkook could wait more, and although that means he has to deal with the occasional voice in his head telling him that lying to you (even under the guise of protecting you) has the capacity to bite back at him, he manages. He swallows down the words whenever you unintentionally give him an opening to tell you about the news of him going abroad, and just settles for holding your hand.

He could wait more because telling you now wouldn’t be the right time, now when you’re on your day-off as you’re close to wrapping up your current project before moving to the bigger, more exhausting one; not now when you have a time of reprieve to spend with your family before taking on the biggest project of your career to date.

Jungkook hums to himself as he looks down on Hwayoung who has a tiny shopping cart to herself, her strikingly round eyes that she got from him (Hwayoung looks more like him the older she gets) looking up to his own.

“Hi, pretty girl,” he lulls, mumbling loudly enough for only her to hear. “You’d understand if appa left for awhile, right?”

“Left?” she questions, holding up her left hand at the mention yet she reels at his query, brows furrowing as she seems to digest the question. “Why?”

“Yup. That’s your left. Good job, baby,” Jungkook praises, the knot in his throat growing when he looks to his daughter who looks confused at the sudden query, again, that came out of nowhere. “You would, won’t you?”

Hwayoung hums because she doesn’t quite understand, but that’s the thing that Jungkook fears most — she’s young and smart and although he wants to use those facts to his advantage, he realizes that Hwayoung being the age that she is in now could also prove him to be dispensable.

Jungkook likes being needed, but he’s much too afraid of the possibility that Hwayoung won’t even recall him as soon as he leaves.

Your husband’s snapped out of his reverie when you go downstairs with a skip in your step, the tell-tale mischievous tone to your voice already predicting that Hwayoung would make the two of you chase after her in the backyard all day. “What are the two of you plotting again?” you ask playfully, hands on your hips as Jungkook chuckles at the sight of his two girls.

“Nothing!” Hwayoung giggles, the word slipping out of her seamlessly as she even shakes her hands fervently, accustomed to what you mean exactly with your tone of voice. She’s young and bright and you see so much of Jungkook in her, even if Jungkook would argue otherwise.

Jungkook’s dazed this morning with the way his gaze locks in from far away, his bottom lip bit between his teeth more often than not as if he’s always at war with himself.

“You okay, Kook?”

“Mhmm. Couldn’t be better,” he hums half-heartedly, his lips grazing your temple as he guides you to sit down on the carpet with him. “You finally slept for more than eight hours. That’s good,” he says as an afterthought, the pauses in between his words growing in distance as his gaze is fixated on everything but you.

Jungkook looks at your daughter who’s now pushing Miso around the house in her shopping cart, and while your cat (who’s always seemed to hate your husband) looks more than pleased at being played with, she meows to Jungkook and only at him with a hiss at the end of her spiel as if in warning — as if Jungkook is guilty of something that only the two of them know about.

Almost as if out of everyone in the room, it’s only your cat who knows that Jungkook’s lying.

Jungkook can wait, but he’s certain that he can’t wait any longer because if his brain is unoccupied for long enough, he’ll start to hear Miso cursing at him through her yowls.

“Hwayoung doesn’t look like she needs you any less,” you say gently, your line of sight following Jungkook’s as he tenses at your words.

“Oh,” he sighs, jaw grinding down to a halt. “Right."

Your words seemingly came out of nowhere, even if the both of you know deep down that they’re influenced by his impulsive thoughts from last week.

“You can say the same for me,” you add, not as an afterthought, but as a lesser-known fact that Jungkook seems to forget every now and then.

There’s a weight in his chest because all of a sudden, Jungkook can’t wait anymore. The itch in his mind has already been scratched too much that it had already bled and scabbed.

There’s a weight in his chest that reminds him he can’t wait anymore, because in hindsight, the weight of him and everything that comes with him settles on his shoulders.

Maybe, Jungkook doesn’t want to be needed as much.

( ♡ )

Jungkook drops the news on you while you’re folding laundry.

He was meant to go for sincere but the way the words leave him, right when you’re in the middle of folding Hwayoung’s pajamas that she’s about to overgrow in the soonest, it sounds as if he’s been dying to tell you; now that he has, he sounds beyond relieved.

“Namjoon offered me a script,” he announces, taking the pajamas from you to put in his pile as he sees your eyes widen, the remnants of the heavy mascara they used on you on set awhile ago highlighting your surprise. “He wants me to produce.”

“What?” you punctuate, tilting your head as you try to make sense of what Jungkook’s saying. You know he’s speaking and you’re familiar with said words; you just never expected for them to be compacted in the same sentence, meaning the way that he makes it out to be. “Kim Namjoon, as in the producer for In Terms of Eternity?”

He chirps at that, posture straightening as he tries to jog your memory. “Yeah. You’ve worked with him before and introduced us, then turns out Jin’s also a friend of his and-…"

“I mean I know Namjoon and that you’re friends with him, Jungkook,” you interrupt, trying to reel yourself in as you’ve lost your focus trying to fold Hwayoung’s clothes and talk to your husband at the same time. “But I didn’t know you were that close for him to ask you to produce something for him.”

Jungkook doesn’t completely crash from the high he’s in over finally telling you the news, but there’s that spike that flashes briefly over his face, the frown on his lips letting on more than he shows.

“What’s that supposed to mean?"

You sigh at the impossible position the both of you are in, the words that try to line themselves up in your temple being no match to the way they translate out-loud. “It means nothing. I’m just… surprised that he’d ask you to be a producer for his script, that’s all. It came out of nowhere.”

Jungkook recoils at that, a stubborn brow raised as he tries to keep his composure. “Because you don’t think I’m capable of being a producer?”

“That’s not what I’m saying,” you inhale sharply, gripping a random article of Hwayoung’s clothing beside you to pace yourself. “Namjoon’s.. big. He’s established, and well, you’ve never become a producer before.”

“And you have?” Jungkook digs, even if it’s unnecessary to do so, and the way his face falls at the forthcoming regret that creeps up to him lets you know that he thinks so too.

“Jungkook,” you try again, quirking your lips to the side as you try to manage with the pace he’s set you up on. “I’m just surprised, that’s all. This is all new to me. All new to you, even. If anything, it’s nice that Namjoon trusts you a lot.

“He does. We’re close,” he nods, clearing his throat as he feels that the both of you could move on to the other phase of the news you had interrupted him at. “As a matter of fact, we’re taking it on a global scale.”

Jungkook doesn’t get why your face falls.

He doesn’t get why your shoulders rise and fall, not in relief, but out of controlled tension that threatens to pour over.

“What?”

“The script. The film,” he smiles, trying to get you to finish his sentence and connect the dots together but to no avail. “It’s… it’s — we have to film in the US for a few months.”

“What?” you repeat, the knot in your throat tangling up more and more hesitance in you the longer it stays there.

“I said, we have to-…”

“No, I heard what you said,” you interrupt, jaw clenching tightly as you try to grasp everything Jungkook has said.

You don’t get why Jungkook’s smiling.

You don’t get why he’s completely at ease and only in confusion as he sees you piece everything out.

“Then what’s the matter?”

“Kook, all of this is new. Everything you’ve just said is and will be new,” you chuckle humorlessly, running your hand through your hair in frustration as you try to relax. “I’m happy for you, believe me, but Jungkook, what you’re saying is serious. It’s a lot to take in,” you pause, eyes wide as you repeat the words to yourself. “You. Producing. In the US, of all places, a-and for months.”

There’s not one exact emotion that runs through you because the longer that Jungkook looks at you, ecstatic, while you’re weighing what he’s just said like a bag of bricks — you feel even more conflicted.

Your husband wrings his hands together, nervously smiling at you as if he’s asking for permission, but the both of you know that his mind’s already set. He thinks the opportunity of producing a short film that’s been drafted by his friend is a once-in-a-lifetime thing, eager to take off even if he’s had no experience at all in the industry.

“I don’t know, baby. It’s just been so long since I got this excited and alive, y’know? It’s a nice change of pace and I get to do something nice-…”

“Isn’t being with your daughter nice?” you ask abruptly, unable to mask the conflict that’s been brewing in your mind ever since Jungkook pulled you aside to talk. You feel hesitant; disconnected even from wrapping your head around his wording.

Even convincing yourself that you’re just spent from working sunrise to sundown doesn’t work. No matter how hard you try, Jungkook’s tone remains as is.

“Y/N,” he sighs, lips in a tight line as he screws his eyes shut. “Don’t start.”

“I’m not starting anything, Jungkook,” you grit, crossing your arms in defense. You feel guarded more than ever, not because you’re the one whom he’s pertaining to, but because your Hwayoung is involved and you won’t sit around for it. “It’s just that when you put it like that, it sounds like taking care of Hwayoung is a chore.”

You used to be sure awhile ago that you were seeing double because in between memorizing scripts and going from schedule to schedule without any time to rest in between, you’ve been worried sick because Jungkook hadn’t texted you the whole day. You were shocked enough to come home to your daughter playing by herself downstairs (with Miso watching her the whole time), even more-so when you saw Jungkook engrossed in a highly-enthusiastic phone call.

Jungkook sighs as if talking to you completely exhausts him, pinching his nosebridge before muttering under his breath. “Like you’re one to talk.”

“Excuse me?” you blink in surprise, tilting your head in sheer confusion. You’re about to shrug it off but he does that thing again, the one where he almost rolls his eyes at you but realizes it at the last minute.

“Nothing.”

“Say that again, Jungkook.”

“My god,” Jungkook groans, throwing his head back. He runs his hands through his hair frustratedly, sucking in a rushed breath. He looks straight at you when he gives his grievance. “I’m just saying! Why do you get to live out your dream but I don’t?”

“This is my job,” you bite back instantly, the second it took for you to digest his words being enough time for him to groan again. “If it were up to me, do you think I’d work six days a week? Do you not know how much it kills me to stay away from my family?”

You’re at a loss for words, the tiny bit of insecurity you have being dug up once again. You feel guilty because you actually don’t — you know to yourself that you still dedicate so much of yourself to Jungkook and Hwayoung even if you work full-time.

Jungkook chokes up a laugh in front of your face.

“Then quit your dream if you’re so miserable.”

Your jaw clenches quickly in annoyance, unable to retain the disbelief that builds up in your chest. “My dream is my job! It’s why we’re living this life in the first place, Jungkook! Your dream is this project that was pitched to you like what, two weeks ago?”

“Can I not live my life the way that I want to?” he asks exaggeratedly, eyes wide in defense. “Why am I only your husband and why am I only Hwayoung’s dad? Why can’t I go to the US a-and try things out? Why can’t I be free from all this even for just a while?”

Your mouth falls apart at that, your moment of shock simultaneously being Jungkook’s instance for guilty. He wants to reel it in right then and there, but the small part of his pride grows to hold him back.

“Do we hold you back that much?” you whisper, the headache that has been building in your head since this morning shrinking to the size of Jungkook’s words. “What are you getting so angry for? I’m not saying no. I’m asking you why you’re so hellbent on suddenly leaving to do this.”

A large part of you, if not all, feels more disappointed than angry. Hwayoung has not and should never be an afterthought for the both of you yet Jungkook brings her up with you like mere variables.

You can grasp the fact that being a parent is a full-time job like yours yet what you can’t get a hold of is your husband’s apprehension; his sudden need of pursuing something beyond your family.

“Because I’m scared, Y/N,” Jungkook whispers, exhaling heavily. “I’m scared that this is all what life could ever be for me.”

It’s only when you’re completely silent that he comes back to the severity of his words, the tension that’s been building up in him breaking the moment that you break eye contact with him.

“I’m sorry for being your wife.”

“Baby, that’s not-…” Jungkook tries to correct himself, hot on your heels as you get up from your seat on the couch. You’re not even speeding up yet he catches you just as urgently, the hold he has on your arm doing little to put you at ease.

“And I’m sorry for making you a dad.”

“Y/N, sweetheart, I’m-…”

“You should do this project if you really want to,” you quip, back still turned to him as you enter the bedroom. Jungkook noticeably stops in his tracks, the furrow in his brows fading because you’ve put him on whiplash.

“What?”

“You’ve held down the fort while I was out being the breadwinner. It’ll be nice for you to do your own thing,” you smile tightly, eager to sleep on the whole thing just so you don’t stay hung-up for too long.

“What about Hwayoung? What about your film? They want it to be an entry for the Academy, right?” he asks in concern, different from the worry he had awhile ago when he thought you were against him leaving.

You nod, easily shrugging despite the weight on your shoulders. “I’m her mom, of course. She’s gonna come first. And for the film, I think I can still do it. I’ll juggle them both if I have to.”

Jungkook nods, eyes set on the floor. He didn’t think this far at all.

“Do you want to hire a nanny? I know a friend.”

“I’ll pass. I don’t trust nannies.”

There’s an overwhelming silence that engulfs the both of you, the white noise machine in your nightstand unable to fill it completely. Jungkook looks at the ceiling while you look at Hwayoung who’s sprawled in the middle of your bed, clutching Miso like a teddy bear — she already fell asleep waiting for the both of you.

“I didn’t mean what I said awhile ago, I’m sorry. It came out the wrong way,” Jungkook apologizes after some time, hand darting out to hold yours while you only hover above your vanity, taking off all of your jewelry except for your wedding ring.

“When do you leave?” you ask, still unable to meet his gaze.

“Next week,” he clears his throat. “When do you start filming?”

You nod, coming into terms that Jungkook would leave no matter what you say. “Next week.”

You’re arranging the covers when your husband tries to hold you again, voice strained and rushed. “Y/N, I really am sorry. I love being your-…”

“Shh,” you interrupt, pursing your lips. “Hwayoung’s sleeping.”

( ♡ )

You asked for a day off.

You’ve rarely ever asked for them throughout your entire career because you were built on the mindset that at the end of the day, you’re also an employee no matter what gig you land. Be it the cameos you used to book with Yoongi or the titular characters you take from studio after studio, you’re still the employee who had worked her way up fairly.

You didn’t ask for it during that instance when you fell sick after back-to-back shoots because you didn’t want to waste anyone’s time. You didn’t ask for it when you woke up with the type of fatigue that settled in your body no matter how hard you closed your eyes or laid your head against the cushions.

You’ve never asked for it for your sake, but you’ve asked for a day off now because Jungkook’s leaving for a place you can’t come and go to as you wish.

Unlike your house or the hotels you book for him and Hwayoung to be at whenever you have to film out of town, Jungkook’s out of reach. He’s one call away, granted that your timezones match up and there’s a connection strong enough for it to continue without a hitch. He’s far from your grasp and he will be for months on end, and you don’t think you can ever stomach working on the same day he’s leaving.

“Are you seeing me off at the airport?” he asks during the car ride, voice audible enough for only you to hear and not Hwayoung who’s sprawled across both of your laps, sleeping soundly with her plushie that resembled Miso.

“I will, but I don’t think I can see you off near the gate. I can only manage up to here,” you answer honestly, willing yourself not to break down even if the both of you are still in the car, away from any prying eyes of the media that lurks outside. “So can Hwayoung,” you add, a large part of you being grateful that she’s asleep when Jungkook has to leave so neither of you would hear her cries.

Jungkook sees that hesitance in you, the same kind that softens him into fragments.

“It’ll only be for awhile, okay? Just for a few months,” he smiles tightly, rearranging his backpack next to him, the keyring that held Hwayoung’s second-favorite toy (not the ultimate favorite because she won’t ever let him take it) clattering loudly. “I love you,” Jungkook murmurs. “Do you know that?”

“Mhmm.”

“Say it back.”

You refuse to do so because saying it back feels finite, perhaps even forced, because although you love Jungkook, saying so at the moment only weighs you down as reality sinks in. “This is gonna be easy for us, right?"

“It’s not like we’ve never been in a similar set-up before,” he shrugs, the pout on his face casual as he tries to level with you.

“But this is different, Jungkook. This is beyond different. We have Hwayoung and now, we’re both working,” you stammer, chest rising and falling as you wrap your head around everything. “This— this isn’t Seoul to Jeonju. This isn’t a leave by day, come back by night type of trip. This is-…”

“You’re freaking out,” Jungkook interjects, his soft yet stern voice cutting through your thoughts as he lays a hand on your thigh, the platinum of his wedding band looking right up at you.

You surrender in defeat, not because you’re fighting with your husband, but because there’s simply no other answer he could ever conjure for you as to why this is happening.

“Why aren’t you? Why am I the only one scared?” you whisper.

“You’re not supposed to be.”

“Of course. It’s not like you— we put everything on the line,” you clear your throat, looking down on your shoes as you convince yourself. You ignore how you’re still not entirely aware of what’s with Jungkook’s project, other than the fact that Namjoon’s the screenwriter, all in favor of giving you a semblance of sanity before Jungkook leaves you and Hwayoung. “Right?”

( ♡ )

You wonder if Jungkook already ate breakfast.

You wonder if he ate the supposedly excellent in-flight meal that comes with first-class tickets, or if he ate the ramen he’s always had a penchant for eating especially during your trips, whether by land, sea, or air. You wonder if he’s grumpy with the altitude and the way he has to pop his ears ever so often, along with the way he always seems to be too long for airplane seats turned into beds.

You call but Jungkook doesn’t answer, even if you know he’ll never not purchase in-flight wifi because he’d rather knock himself out than have to read a book or something of the sort. You message, but then again, your husband doesn’t answer, even if you know he’ll much rather reply via text than to record a voice note because he’s shy with people hearing him in public spaces, albeit closed.

Hwayoung waits patiently beside you, swinging her legs back and forth on the couch as Miso stays up with her. She should’ve been in bed half an hour ago but you let her stay up with you, all in the pursuit of getting Jungkook to respond.

“Appa?” she asks again after a minute of you trying for her dad but through another app, her pout reminding you of Jungkook’s who’s unreachable.

You try not to frown in front of her, leveling yourself as you settle for kissing her forehead to cover up the sigh that originates deep from your chest.

“Not yet, Young-ie.”

.

.

.

There’s no text from Jungkook when you wake, but there is a picture of him in the buffet of the private lounge he’s staying at during his layover.

Atleast Jungkook did eat breakfast and Hwayoung was able to sleep without him (the first of what you dread is many), nevermind the dull thrum in your chest in Jungkook’s absence.

( ♡ )

Hwayoung's been behaved the whole time you were on set.

With Jimin prioritizing his voluntary role of being a babysitter to your daughter over his position of being a manager to you, you became instantly comforted at the reassurance that you're not in this situation alone.

It's only been a week since you started working right after Jungkook left, his absence rearranging every system you've previously had in place. You do your very best to have Hwayoung still thriving, and even just the reminder that you are succeeding at being the only present parent for the meantime melts all of your fatigue away.

Your trailer's more equipped for her than it is for you, the space apparently reminding Hwayoung of home so much that it's enough to make her remind you that Miso should go join the both of you sometime. Your dressing room's always been hers, and so has been the affection of everyone close to you.

“I take my role of godfather very seriously.”

Yoongi explains even if you haven't asked him anything. In fact, you weren't talking to begin with. It's not in his nature to talk for the sake of talking (that's Jungkook's), but even with Hwayoung in his arms and you still being lost in your thoughts, he can't help but to feel concerned.

“I can tell," you snicker, finally taking notice of the sight in front of you. The earpiece that was previously on Yoongi is now slung over Hwayoung's shoulder, obviously too big on her. She wanted it as an accessory (it reminds her of the toy stethoscope she'd put on Miso as a collar) and with Yoongi being himself, he can't bring himself to say no.

Your shooting day's nearly over and although today wasn't as long as your previous record of hours on end, you already seem exhausted. Yoongi, of all people, knows what scenes wear you out. You hated doing monologues as a rookie and still despise monologues (but with random, out-of-place advertisements in between) as a veteran — you’ve done neither today.

"What's with the frown?" he asks gently, not only because Hwayoung’s been quiet for the past two minutes and she’s getting groggy, but also because if he were to ask you any louder, he feels as if you’d break.

"It's nothing," you answer automatically, looking at Hwayoung to ground yourself. "Just usual family things, I guess."

"Trouble in paradise?" Yoongi asks with a chuckle, abruptly stopping his fit of amusement when he gets goosebumps starting from the tail of his spine. He instantly recognizes it as deja vu. "I've asked you this before, haven't I?"

The realization doesn’t hit you until he points it out.

"Mhmm," you hum absent-mindedly, playing with the hem of your dress. “I don't think the problem now is anything like how it was before, though."

One night several years ago, you and Yoongi were sat side-by-side in the booth of a club, the heartbreak you had over what Jungkook’s done (and haven’t, at the time) being the wedge between you.

Now, Yoongi’s standing in front of you while you’re sat down, your daughter with Jungkook in his arms.

“Me neither. I don't know how you and Jungkook can encounter any problem worse than last time, to be honest," he chuckles, shaking his head at the recollection of the hell you’ve been through. "Also, I think I can say that because I literally don't know what's going on with you. But if you do tell me-!"

"You're so nosy,” you snort, the brief moment of playfulness welcome because your head aches the longer that you dwell over your worries.

"I can be the judge to see if what you're going through now is worse than before," Yoongi shrugs to fake nonchalance, unaware that you’re gasping in awe until you kick him lightly in the shin.

Hwayoung’s asleep in his arms.

"She's never did that with anyone before," you murmur, fishing for your phone to take a picture, but not before quickly skimming to see if Jungkook’s sent you any messages; he hasn’t. “She only either sleeps in mine or Jungkook's arms. Not for my parents, not for my in-laws. Just me and him."

Yoongi smiles proudly, stroking Hwayoung’s hair proudly. "What can I say? I'm godfather of the year."

He only sways her gently back and forth, rocking her with the patience and attention that remind you of Jungkook’s when Hwayoung was a newborn.

You’re calm and quiet to see her adjusting so well already, but you can’t help but to feel lost because you feel the exact opposite. No one’s gonna stroke your hair for you and tell you to take your time — those are Jungkook’s tasks alone, yet your grievances are also because of him.

"Jungkook's producing this short film in the US. It's by his friend," you mutter under your breath after some time in silence. Yoongi flicks his eyes up at you as if you’re talking about the weather, careful not to make you feel more conflicted than you already are. “You know… by Namjoon.”

"Since when was he into that?" he asks out of curiosity, eyebrows furrowed because he didn’t know that your opening line would ever transition to this point in the conversation. Yoongi catches a second wind the longer he processes your words, the scoff that leaves his lips making his bangs loose despite the hairspray on them. “Since when did Jungkook and Namjoon belong in the same sentence?”

"I don't know either.”

"So we're both producers now?" he snickers, the teasing already coming natural. "Nepo husband alert."

You roll your eyes in recognition, clearing your throat as soon as the laughter died between the two of you. “We got into this argument and I don't know, I-I realized I was being selfish for a moment because I didn't want him to go at first, you know?" you admit in full sincerity, exhaling the lump that forms in your throat. “He said he was afraid that this is everything he'll be. My husband, Hwayoung's dad. So on and so forth."

Yoongi only listens this time, giving the occasional hum there to remind you that he’s still there.

"And last night, he, uh, he forgot to call," you gulp, already feeling the weight of your worries settle in your stomach. "The call wasn't even for me. It's for Hwayoung because he promised he'll still read her whatever she wants."

The three of you cherish that time together because normally, it happens as soon as you get home from work. Hwayoung’s long graduated from storybooks and has now branched out to the most ridiculous texts that Jungkook indulges her with nonetheless — from the ingredient list at the back of milk cartons, and all the way to Reddit threads of how cats find their way back home to owners.

"He's been secretive about the whole thing and I-I… I do that too with my projects, I get it. But only at first because I'm literally bound to an NDA," you stammer, pinching your nosebridge to get past the frustration. “I’m just-…!" you give up, admitting the truth. "I did some snooping."

"And?" Yoongi prompts, tilting his head in anticipation.

"I think he's been secretive because the main lead's Eunsu."

Yoongi recoils at that, so much so that it almost wakes up Hwayoung.

"Eunsu? As in Park Eunsu?" he repeats, the scowl on his face getting deeper the more that you stay indifferent. “Eunsu as in your nemesis?"

You relent, the mention of her finally hitting close.

"Nemesis sounds a little childish."

Yoongi scoffs immediately, rolling his eyes at your correction. “I mean yeah, because people keep pitting her against you when she doesn't even come close," he shrugs easily, make you tut in warning. "What? I'm just saying what everybody's been thinking."

To know that you can still confide in Yoongi no matter what comforts you — what doesn’t is that this time around, your gut feeling’s stronger than it had been the last time.

"I hope I'm wrong."

"I hope so too," he exhales, shaking his head in disbelief. "What kind of asshole sleeps with his wife's enemy?"

"Don't put that out there,” you grumble, the unintentional yet weird arrangement of words making you dizzy.

"Sorry. It's a metaphor, dummy," Yoongi surrenders, clearing his throat. "Okay. Retake. What kind of husband produces a film featuring his wife's rival?

"Hopefully not mine."

( ♡ )

It takes little effort to love you.

Loving you specifically doesn’t have to be hard.

Jungkook thinks that loving you isn’t hard when you serve as the peace to his otherwise hectic and turbulent mind. You manifest into the comfort he looks for in all seasons, be it the heat pack you wordlessly put in his coat pocket or the scrunchie you put around his wrist no matter the weather whenever his hair got too long.

You don’t text him at every hour of the day whether you were working or not, but you’ve made it a point to always check up on him multiple times even if the both of you are at home, going as far to randomly waking up in the night to pause your breathing and check up on his with a hand on his chest.

It’s easy love — one that could be grasped by everyone because as the world has proved to him time and time again, you’re easy to fall with and for.

You may not coo and awe at every single thing he utters, but the adoration behind your eyes always makes him warm from the inside because you held onto him, no matter how anticlimactic his stories could be.

Neither you and Jungkook are easy, that much he knows.

He knows it because although it’s never been his intention to come home late during his allotted short break between filming (it’s disguised as a break even if he only came back to take care of work-related matters personally), you make it known that you’re irked with him for every other reason.

He knows that you aren’t easy because for the past three weeks he’s been gone, you’ve reiterated twice in the last hour alone how you’ve asked him again and again who will star in his short film. You’ve asked Jungkook repeatedly to give you details outside of Namjoon and the vaguest bits he could ever give you, establishing the fact that he isn’t even bound to an NDA.

It’s the persisting barrage of questions in your head that bothers you without a single break. It’s the hovering feeling of doom above your head because having no answers to any of them, on top of Jungkook closing himself off with or without the physical distance between the two of you and being Hwayoung’s sole caregiver, that your patience ultimately thins.

Your annoyance towards your husband is clearly obvious and it bothers him to the point of frustration. Jungkook’s been convinced since last week that if he just dodged your questions for long enough and blamed it on the connection of your call, he wouldn’t have to answer to you; he wouldn’t have to explain the fine details of the project he’s kept from you.

If he had only avoided you for long enough, you would’ve forgotten about the rumors surrounding Namjoon’s upcoming screenplay that had been leaked to the press, and the roster of actresses thought out to be the main lead of his short film.

If he had only ignored your pleas for long enough, he would have never succumbed to the preliminary guilt that comes with lying to you under the impression that he’s only being protective, pushing him to drink until his vision spins — enough for him that when he admits the truth to you, your face of heartbreak directed at him isn’t as anguishing.

“Fine, fuck it! Since you’re so nosy, yes. Eunsu is my main lead, there! She’s my muse!” Jungkook just about yells, breathless from the burn of alcohol in his throat that spreads all the way to his chest, and from the back and forth he’s been going at with you for the last hour.

“Why didn’t you tell me in the first place?!” you retort, fists clenching at your sides as the thought of Jungkook with Eunsu, with her of all actresses, in a foreign place at almost every minute of the workday irking you.

“Would it have made a difference? You’d still be angry at me,” he rolls his eyes, placing a hand on his hip as he tries to stabilize his gaze on you.

“And even then, you wouldn’t do anything about it, right? Because that’s just your nature, Jungkook,” you scoff, your dig at him being incredibly low yet you steel your pride, unwilling to back down at the thought that Jungkook’s been lying to you for three weeks– perhaps even longer.

He presses a tongue to his cheek as you pertain to the past loud and clear, the sarcastic nod he gives you making your breathing tremble.

“Why? Why does it have to be her?” you try again, this time with your jaw clenched so your anger won’t flare up because you’ve been dying to have a decent explanation from Jungkook for weeks.

“Why can’t it be her?” he counters. “B-because she’s what, she’s your rival or something? You’re jealous? Bitter?”

The knot in your chest tightens, the recall you have of the woman who had sabotaged you repeatedly when you were still a rookie putting a metallic taste on your tongue. She’s hindered you in ways that not even Yoongi could explain fully despite being the closest friend to you in the industry, the vitriol you’ve had for Eunsu in the past reviving back to life.

You have no words except for the fact that begs to be acknowledged without a single syllable.

“I’m your wife, Jungkook,” you exhale shakily, the gravity of it seemingly not enough for him because he refuses to use it as a reason to get on your side.

“Don’t you think I know that? Don’t you think everybody knows that by now?” Jungkook spits. “When I’m producing my film with Eunsu, I don’t want to be your husband, Y/N! I’m sick of it,” he seethes. “Eunsu has nothing to do with me. Why should I fight your battles for you? Why do I have to carry your grudges for something that doesn’t even concern me?”

Jungkook’s the drunkest he’s ever been in his life, yet he utters the clearest words you’ve ever heard him say.

“This is showbiz, Y/N. It’s inevitable for you to get caught up with shit.”

“You’re talking as if being my husband and being Hwayoung’s dad is a chore.”

“Because maybe it is!” Jungkook bursts with a cry, the tears that spring out of his eyes momentarily blinding him. “Because maybe, I’m fed up trying to be sickeningly devoted to you all the time.”

There’s something akin to white, hot, searing pain that spreads across your chest all the way to your temple, the tremble of your lips not enough for Jungkook to realize that you’re on the verge of sobbing.

“Sometimes I hate this. I… I-I hate this life I’m living because of you, Y/N,” Jungkook whispers. “I hate how you’re so, so perfect in juggling everything. I hate how I could spend an hour just convincing Hwayoung to eat a single carrot and you come in the room, and she finishes the bowl with a smile on her face. I-I hate how you never complain whenever you need to do late night feedings after a long day because I’m already snoring. I hate how with or without work, you’re still just—…” he stills, looking at you with a distraught gaze. “You’re still so content. You’re still able to be yourself like you’ve always been.”

There’s no words left in you; no thought at all that could ever pick you up from the ground and gather yourself the way you’ve always had whenever you and Jungkook had felt the furthest from each other.

“Jungkook,” you sniffle, even if he waves you off half-heartedly. “I’m sorry if-…”

“There it is. There it fucking is again!” Jungkook whines, foot agitatedly stomping against the floor as he pulls at his hair. “You’re apologizing for being so perfect in life that it’s making me feel bad!”

“But I’m not! I’m far from it, what the hell are you talking about?” you rasp, the sarcastic laugh that goes past your lips making his ears ring. “I’m sorry if it seems that way but I’m telling you myself that everything is not perfect the way you make it out to be. I’m sorry because it makes you feel bad, but if anything-…”

Jungkook raises a finger at you, his jaw tightening the longer he stews in displacement.

“Don’t. Don’t. Don’t tell me how content you are with everything despite being exhausted, or how you juggling everything is worth it. Don’t tell me how good of a dad I am."

“Then what can I say to make it lighter for you, Jungkook? What can I say that won’t make you resent me?” you grit in surrender, chest falling so lowly, you’ve forgotten to breathe for a long second. “Do you hate the life that we’re living now so much that you can’t even look at me?”

Love isn’t always a matter of ease and although it’s always stuck to you, you prove now that Jungkook coming home to you at this instance, in this light, that he makes love the most difficult thing.

“Do you hate the life that I gave you so badly?”

“I don’t,” he answers, mouth dry as his vision spins. “Sometimes. Tonight, though — maybe I do. It comes and goes.”

“Then what can we do about it?” you whisper, your vision hazy as you look at him. “Where do we go from here?”

“It’s getting late,” Jungkook only whispers, unwilling to look at the bed you share. “I have an early flight tomorrow.”

[rueclfer]

heyy there can i request some more touya headcannons? i really enjoy your way of picturing him because it’s just so canon and he’s kinda a lovely dick y’know. whatever comes to ur mind. thank u so much!!

weelll since you gave me so much freedom here r some touya as a housemate hcs ANNDD a moodboard bc i enjoy the visualization <3 since we talked abt this the other day too !! (i yapped so hard here sry sry this is so indulgent)

bakugou's and sero's version too hehe

housemates // touya todoroki

touya hates the idea of living with a complete stranger or one of his siblings, so what other option does he have other than forcing his best friend (crush) on a lease with him?

the newfound freedom definitely puts him on his ass for a few weeks. barely sleeps. eats like shit. trash is scattered everywhere. several unpacked boxes. it stays like this until fuyumi comes over to check our the place and gives you two a hard scolding to get your shit together.

more often than not, you'd end up waking up on the couch with your legs sprawled out across his lap and his upper half leaned over the couch arm rest in deep sleep. staying up so late was probably one of his favorite things about living together. being able to talk as loud as you wanted, watch movies late into the night, look over the city from your balcony- he found solitude in existing with you.

if he wasn't already codependent before moving in together, just know his ass will be GLUED TO YOU. you'd be doing work in your room and he'd barge in and flop down on your bed without a word. maybe he'd gotten a bit too comfortable.

if he's feeling extra annoying that day, he'd bring in his guitar and amp and keep asking you to rate his riffs until you entirely give up on work and give him some attention.

is it obvious his love language is quality time? not only that, gift giving too. he's like a fucking crow.

"look what i found. it's a rock. for you."

makes him soooo giddy to see your display of the rocks, feathers, and dried up flowers he picked up for you on his walk. sometimes you'd come home and there'd be a new addition to the ever growing collection.

ofc you'd return the energy in a different way. touya will not cook for himself. ever. he eats like shit as an internal rebellion against the healthy diet he was forced upon as a kid, but you will not allow that boy to rot himself from the inside out!! he can expect several tupperwares of portioned out meals with notes attached to the lids if you know he'd be home all day by himself.

"to t <3. if you don't eat every last bite i'll find out and it'll hurt my feelings and i might combust into flames or something idk don't risk it!"

i can also imagine him holding back tears whenever you ever come into his room to hand him a bowl of cut up fruit. the first time you do it he'd be speechless like jaw dropped taken aback. has he ever felt love like this??? i think not.

despite all of the kind gestures, he's still touya todoroki. hides your keys if you annoyed him that morning by rushing him in the bathroom and makes you a few minutes late to class/work. chronic door slammer. pisses with the door wide open. no sense of privacy and do not gaf to knock. always locking himself out -> i feel strongly about this like imagine coming home after a long day and he's sitting out in the hallway with a pouty face waiting for you hehehe.

i don't think he'd realize this crush until a few months after you've moved in together. how could he when you two practically already act and bicker like an old married couple?

yes- peanut butter belongs in the fridge. no- it doesn't. stop leaving your socks everywhere. you forget to flush again. stop slamming the doors. you ate my chips, didn't you? don't lie. did you really need to put the mugs up that high? (he does it on purpose, and tightens the lid to every jar too.)

it wasn't until one late evening when he comes home to find you frantically mixing a doughy substance in a large metal bowl. you never bake, but you have your own oven now, so why not?

"god, finally. help me, my arms hurt." you groan, shoving the bowl in his hands. "i think i fucked up."

he sees the hurricane aftermath of your kitchen- flour everywhere, egg shells left on the counter, every single jar imaginable opened and scattered around. he could be teasing you about the mess, but god you looked so beautiful with that stupid wrinkle in between your eyebrows as you read over the recipe, and the streaks of flour across your pant leg from wiping your hands, and the way you swipe away the stray pieces of hair falling in your face with the back of your hand- oh fuck.

he thinks he's falling in love with you.

he swallows it, but he starts acting kinda weird around the apartment.

like he's.... avoiding you?

living with his best friend whom he just so happens to develop a crush for, would eat him alive. he locks himself in his room and chain smoke out his window while he's stressing the fuck out. he told you he'd stop smoking, but he's sure you'd understand the need for it right now. he hopes you can't smell it.

i also think he'd be a stress cleaner lmaaoo he cannot sit still with his thoughts for too long, so the headphones are ON and blasting and he'll definitely use that as a scapegoat + the loud ass vacuum for ignoring you if you try to talk to him while he's on this cleaning frenzy.

you think he's sick LMAO imagine the pain he feels when you come knocking on his door and calling out that you're leaving a bowl of soup and cough medicine outside his door for him. he doesn't tell you that yeah he's sick but *not in that way*

lovesick. that boy is lovesick!!!!!!

how do you avoid your housemate while you figure out how to control your feelings?

he confesses via note that he leaves on the kitchen counter. really simple tbh nothing too extravagant, but he signs off by telling you that he's staying crashing at fuyumi's for a couple days.

you text him a string of obscenities to get his ass back home and he does (he's scared of you).

he CAANNOOTT talk about his feelings in an adult way. he is sitting on the complete opposite side of the couch, twiddling his thumbs, and staring down at his feet like a child while you reread his confession note out loud to him. you find his discomfort hilarious but endearing. he finds you unbearably insufferable.

jesus the amount of times in that apartment where he would storm off to his room whenever you two got in an argument or you pissed him off...old habits die hard, you guess, because this isn't the todoroki household anymore and you aren't scared to lose that deposit and kick a door down.

once you corner him and get him to open up about his feelings the air in the room suddenly shift!! the clouds are clearing and the sun is shining woooowww look at what good communication can do.

sharing an apartment with your BOYFRIEND is no different than sharing one with your best friend. i think he'd like to keep your separate bedrooms to have your own space, but you'll rarely sleep apart.

so! many! new! traditions!

helping him dye his hair on the first saturday of every month. biweekly horror movie marathons. counting the communal piggy bank ever couple months. trying new takeout spots until you find THE spot for every category- chinese, pizza, ramen, etc etc.

and finally, an everlasting mark on your first apartment together: a small carved out heart around your initials left on the inner corner of a kitchen cabinet done with his pocket knife on a random weekday evening while you two are cooking dinner together.

-

touya tag: @moonchild701 @kaldurahms-lover @themultifandomgirl @devilslittlehelper @porusuniverse @ratatellie @katbug37 @ggriwm

[dia-souls]

DIABOLIK LOVERS Imajin Tokuten Drama CD “Kawaii Plushie, Fanboys' Confusion!!!”

Original title: かわいいぬいぐるみ、ファンボーイの混乱

Source: Fanmade Tokuten Drama CD

Story by: Admin Afra

Seiyuu: Suegara rie, Midorikawa Hikaru, Toriumi Kousuke, Katsuyuki Konishi, Takashi Kondou, Tomoaki Maeno, Hirakawa Daisuke, Kaji Yuki,

Admin's note: Hey guys Finally, after a long time, a new drama CD by me Admin Afra. Who misses me??? Lol... Although I can't write comedy CDs and scenarios as well as Admin Irsa. But recently, my headcanon for plushie Yui has been very much noticed. That's why I decided to try this CD for this headcanon. If you like it, I will write Mukami and Tsukinami versions soon. This Sakamaki version is presented to you. I hope you like it. Don't forget to review and comment.

_This scene begins in the living room of the Sakamaki mansion. The triplets are watching Kou on a TV show.

Ayato: Why is that stupid idol in all the shows? I'm getting bored.

_Ayato changes the channel.

*Tap Tap*

Kanato: Ayato... can you please choose a channel and let us all watch it?

Ayato: Shut up!!!! Do not order Ore-sama. Ore-sama will watch whatever he likes. I don't want to see the face of that stupid idol on all channels.

_Ayato changes the channel again.

*Tap Tap*

Laito: You are right, Ayato-kun. I am much prettier. If I were an idol, I would have more fans than him. They probably showed me on more channels.

Ayato: If I saw you on TV, then I would blow up the TV.

Kanato: Me too...

Laito: Heeh... don't be so cruel. I'm sure more girls would be my fans.

_Ayato turns off the TV.

Ayato: I don't understand why there are so many channels and TV shows for girls. Why don't they make a TV show for boys? For example, the takoyaki eating contest.

Kanato: Ayato, no boy wants to watch such a show. Only you like it.

Laito: Hmmmmm. I don't like to see some boys with big mouths eating takoyaki. Even thinking about it makes me sick. I prefer to see cute and beautiful girls.

Kanato: There are idol girls too, Laito.

Laito: I know, but none of them can make my heart beat fast like Bitch-chan.

_Ayato swears under his breath.

Ayato: Chhh... Stupid pervert...

_Laito takes the TV remote from Ayato's side and turns the TV back on.

*Tap Tap*

_Laito changes several channels to a plushie advertisement.

Laito: Is that plushie... bitch-chan's plushie???

_Both Ayato and Kanato stare at the TV after hearing this. The TV is promoting the popular school club girl named Komori Yui.

Ayato: What the hell. Chichinashi???? Since when has Chichinashi been famous?

Laito: School club??? Ahhh, now I remember. A few months ago, bitch-chan said she wanted to join a school club. Hmmm, apparently, she is very popular among the boys in the club.

Kanato: IT'S UNFORGIVABLE. How dare that girl participate in the club without my permission? *SOB*.... I.... won't forgive her... *SOB*...

Ayato: That idiot... how dare she go out with other boys without Ore-sama's permission? When I see her, I will punish her.

Laito: Hmmmmm... I'm very sad to see that my dear bitch-chan has become popular with all these boys. She just needs to pay attention to me.

Shu: Pwaahhhhhhh.... can you shut up. Didn't you say just a few seconds ago that you want a TV show for boys? So why are you complaining now?

_Ayato, Kanato, and Laito flinched at Shu's voice.

Ayato: Waaahhhhh... Shu what the hell. What the hell are you doing here? When did you come here?

_Shu was lying on the couch and yawned.

*Rustle Rustle*

Shu: I was here from the beginning. You three idiots did not notice my presence.

Ayato: Shut up. You are always like this. Wherever you go, you sleep without talking to anyone. Obviously, no one will notice your presence.

Shu: Shut up... it's too loud. My ear hurt.

Ayato: Bastard...

_Shu opened one of his eyes and looked at the TV advertisement that was playing.

Shu: Hmmm... interesting... maybe I'll buy one for myself.

Ayato: Hahaha... don't tell me you like this ugly doll.

Shu: What's the problem with it? I can use it as a pillow. This way, when she is not with me, I can have her by my side.

Ayato: ...

Laito: ....

Kanato: ... I can't believe that this lazy man came up with such a good idea.

Laito: Nfu... that's a good idea. I would really like to have another version of Yui-chan too. In this way, I can do whatever I want with it.

Kanato: Fufu... Yes, Teddy will also be happy to have a new friend. Ne teddy I can dress up it like dolls to make it the most beautiful doll in the world.

Ayato: Tch... you two are very childish.

Laito: Come on Ayato. Wouldn't you like to have a small version of Bitch-Chan? Whenever Yui-chan is not with you, she can make takoyaki for you.

Ayato: Huh??? Can it really do that?

Shu: You are so stupid.

Ayato: Shut up. I have to try it myself, otherwise I don't believe it.

Laito: Nfu~ So let's go to that store and buy this cute plushie.

*TIMESKIP*

_Ayato, Laito and Kanato are walking in the store.

Ayato: Shit... why is it so crowded here?

Kanato: I can't stand people's noise. It's so noisy.

Laito: You two are very impatient. Nfu~ Be patient and then we'll go home with that cute plushie.

???: Oh my... KarlHeinz's sons are in the fanboy store. Hahaha... what a funny subject.

*click click*

_The triplets look behind them when they hear a familiar voice.

Ayato: Haaaaa..... Kino!!!! what are you doing here?

Kino: Isn't it obvious? I came looking for my dear princess. She is not with you?

Ayato: Who said she's yours? She is only my prey. Chichinashi is not with us.

Kino: Huh? what a pity I wanted to go like a lovely couple and buy that cute plushie.

Kanato: Did you come here for the plushie?

Kino: Of course. She is my lovely princess and I am her prince.

Ayato: Don't talk nonsense.

Kino: I myself encouraged her to participate in this club. They were looking for cute and beautiful girls to support animals. My dear princess was so cute and tried for animals that she quickly became popular among the boys. I'm thinking that my princess should have become a famous idol instead that Mukami.

Laito: Although I don't like you, I agree with you. But I don't want to share my beloved Bitch-chan with other boys.

Kino: In any case, this promotion is for promoting this club and because of Yui's new popularity. In addition to boys, she has become very popular among girls.

_A person with a black cape, hat, mask and glasses that completely covers his face enters the store.

Ayato: Hah... Thief...

Laito: Nfu~ He isn't a thief. He is only a shy fanboy who doesn’t like to be known at all.

Kino: Scary. Some fans are very scary.

_The suspicious man buys a plushie and quickly leaves the store.

Kanato: Heyyyyyyyy. I want to leave this store faster.

Kino: I also don't like to see other boys buy my dear princess plushie.

_Ayato goes in front of Kino and grabs his collar tightly in his fist.

*Rustle Rustle*

Ayato: Listen, bastard. I will not let you buy that plushie at all. Chichinashi is only my prey.

Kino: Fufu Ayato-kun, if you think like that... you should stop all those boys who are standing in front of the cash register buying plushies.

_Kino points to the counter and Ayato turns his head to look there. A group of boys lined up in front of the cash register to buy plushies.

Ayato: Chhh... you bastards...

_Ayato quickly releases Kino's collar and goes to stand in front of the cash register in front of all the boys.

Ayato: Everyone listen.

_Ayato takes the speaker from the vendor and speaks through it.

Ayato: Ore-sama is speaking. Get out of the store, you bastards. This girl is my prey and no one but me has the right to buy this plushie.

_All the boys and vendors stare at Ayato.

Ayato: Did you hear what I said? Ore-sama will give you orders. Hurry up and get out of the store

Kanato: Is he serious?

Laito: Oh, oh. I think we are going to be in trouble.

Kino: Pffff.... Hahahahaha.... Your brother is so stupid.

Kanato: Laito. Let's buy the plushie and go before it causes us trouble.

_Laito and Kanato go to the group of boys so that the seller won't notice that they are with Ayato.

Ayato: Oi, Kanato, Laito, why did you go to them? Let's help me get rid of these bastards.

Kino: Hmmmm. Things are getting interesting.

*TIMESKIP*

Ayato: Chhh... Ahhhhh... How is the security of that store so strong? The place where he kicked me still hurts.

Kanato: You are so stupid, Ayato.

Ayato: Shut up. It's your fault that you didn't help me, otherwise we would have kicked out all those bastards.

Laito: Shame on you, Ayato-kun... I don't like being beaten by security at all. My beautiful face becomes scarred and I become ugly.

Ayato: You are so pathetic Laito...

_Kino walks behind them while laughing under his breath.

Ayato: You bastard... why are you laughing at us? You got what you wanted. Why are you following us?

Kino: Oh... Ayato-kun don't be so mean. I would like to see my dear princess.

Ayato: Shut up. I won't let you see her.

Laito: At least we could all buy plushies.

Kino: Too bad. I wanted to see my dear princess. But I think it doesn't matter. I will call her when I get home. I can't wait to take a picture of myself and this plushie and send it to her. Her reaction must be very cute... Fufu... Goodbye. I hope to see you very soon.

_Kino moves away from the triplets while waving his hand.

Ayato: Haha... in hell...

*TIMESKIP*

_Ayato, Kanato and Laito enter the mansion.

Ayato: Chhch... My body hurts.

Shu: Pwaahh... So you are finally back.

_Shu is lying on the couch while yawning and Yui's plushie is on the pillow next to his head.

Laito: ....

Kanato: ...

Ayato: ...... How???? Oi lazy man, how did you get that plushie without coming to the store?

Shu: Huh? It's... so easy. I ordered online.

Ayato: ....

Kanato: Haaaaaaa???? WHAT DO YOU MEAN? WE COULD ORDER IT INSTEAD OF GOING TO THAT ANNOYING STORE, SHU WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL US? I WON'T FORGIVE YOU. I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU...

Shu: I was surprised why the three of you took so much trouble to go to that store. Well, this is not my problem. Now please be quiet. I want to sleep You are very noisy.

Ayato: You bastard...

Laito: Nfu~ I can't wait anymore. I want to do many things with this plushie. Ahhh, even thinking about it makes me hot.

Kanato: I would like to try different clothes on her. My new and beautiful doll is going to be very beautiful.

Ayato: Both of you shut up. This is going to be very interesting. Ahemm... Ahemm... Chichinashi, go make me some takoyaki.

_Laito and Kanato stare at Ayato and Shu smirks.

Kanato: ...

Laito: ....

Shu: Pffffff... you are so stupid.

Ayato: What?

Laito: Did you really expect a plushie to be able to move and make takoyaki for you?

Ayato: Huh? It can't? So why did we try so hard to buy it?

Shu: I am satisfied. It smells like that woman. It is a good pillow. At least when Yui is not here, this plushie will help me.

Kanato: You don't understand how precious dolls are.

Laito: I can also try interesting fantasies on it.

_Yui rushes into the room.

Yui: Ayato-kun, Reiji-san is very angry with you. He said that you in the store___

_The triplets stare at Yui.

Yui: What the..... !!!!!

Ayato: Oi Chichinashi. This ridiculous doll can't make takoyaki for me. Hurry up, make me takoyaki.

Yui: ...

_Meanwhile in Subaru's room.

Subaru: Hah... hah... I did it. I really i did it.

_Subaru enters his room while wearing a black coat, glasses and a mask and quickly goes to his coffin and puts Yui plushie in it and looks at it.

Subaru: I did it...

_Subaru blushes while staring at Yui plushie.

Subaru: Damn it... this is so cute...

_Subaru hugs Plushie and sleeps inside the coffin.

Subaru: Yui, please always stay with me...

_Meanwhile in Reiji's room. Reiji is sitting on a chair and brushing the plushie hair that was pre-ordered a few days ago.

Reiji: Good grief... these things are not for me.

_Reiji covered his face with his hand to hide his embarrassment.

Reiji: No one should know about this. NO ONE.

[am-i-interrupting]

Can’t Go Back | Silco x Reader

Chapter 2 | Dragon’s Hoard

Summary: You had a long, complicated history with Silco before he became the Eye of Zaun. You thought you’d buried it a long time ago. It all starts to re-emerge from the ground when Vander dies and Powder is found in the hands of Silco.

You weren't always one of Babette's little pride.

Once, some long years ago, you worked down in the mines. The air was thick, you'd have to swallow it down your lungs and still you'd gasp as you did it. It'd blur your vision. The soot mixed in would sting your eyes.

You didn't think back to those days much anymore or rather you tried not to. The past would always be a part of you, it made you. You just didn't like to think about it. You'd never forget it though.

You always felt like you were dragging. You weren't walking home when you left those mines, you were dragging a body and it ached. The joints cracked, the muscles throbbed, the chest weighed down heavy.

You felt like that now.

You shook Powder awake merely an hour ago. She groaned and looked up at you with blurry eyes filled with sleep. She rubbed them and blinked several times as her vision cleared.

"Let's go," you told her. "I'll take you to my place for a little while and then we can do whatever you want."

You thought maybe the extra bribe would cheer her up but her brows furrowed.

"I don't want to leave," she said.

You blinked several times, reeling from shock. You squeezed her shoulder.

"Powder, we've gotta go," you said. "Ekko misses you. He's worried sick. Don't you want to see him?"

She wrapped her arm around her torso and looked away. She shook her head. “I'm not. . . ready. Tell him I miss him?"

“Pow—“

"She's been safe and healthy with me for the past four months," Silco said as he entered the room with three steaming drinks. He placed one blue mug with a silver, scale patterned handle in front of Powder and she took it immediately. "I think she'll be able to survive a bit longer. Coffee?"

"You gave her coffee? She's ten." you said.

"Hardly too young, but no," he replied.

"It's hot chocolate," she said. She stretched her hands out towards you, mug cupped in them. “Want some? It's really good."

"No, thank you, Powder,” you said, causing her to halt her movements as she brought the mug back to her but she shook her head and pulled it close to her chest. "Are you sure?"

She nodded her confirmation.

You worried the inside of your lip. Then pressed those same lips to her temple and ruffled her hair.

"I love you, kid," you told her.

You got up, glared at Silco who gave you a false look of innocence.

“You better take care of her,” you said with a finger digging into his chest.

“I plan on doing little else.”

You left, somehow believing him.

That is how you got to where you were now, wandering around the streets, thinking of how you were going to tell Ekko that Powder didn't want to see him right now when you couldn't even process that she felt safe with Silco.

“You were gone all night, you had us worried." Babette said as you walked into her office. You slumped down with defeat into one of her couches. "What happened? Did you find her?"

"Yeah, it was her," you said.

Babette didn't pry with words. She sighed as she stood and asked someone in the hall for something. You weren’t able to catch what.

"Ekko was caught trying to sneak after you," she said, now leaning in the entryway. "You should go see him. He cares about you-“ someone came in with two cups- “Thank you, sweetheart. He cares about you more than you know. It'd put him at ease."

She handed you a teacup, small and delicate. It was made of a white base painted with pink lines.

You took a sip from it.

"I don't know what to tell him," you admitted. “I don't know how to tell him. Powder is right there. He finally accepts that maybe we won't ever find her or Violet and now Powder is here and she doesn't want to see him.”

"Is it really better he thinks she's dead?" she asked. "Does he deserve that pain?"

There was a flash behind your eyes of a woman with dark skin and light hair tainted red.

"Of course not. He doesn't deserve any of what's happened to him. He shouldn't have to lose as many people as he had and neither should she,” you said as you sagged into the cushions.

Silence stretched between the two of you.

Your eyes went to the walls covered in masks. You focused on one in particular.

It was a mask, made of copper.

Engraved were little swirls and detailing for the skull. A pair of ears were at the top of it, pointed upward. The nose was long and angled but perfectly fitted to your face. A fox skull mask, old but so well taken care of. Almost chaotically, a blue color was smattered along the mask and dipped into the crevices, sinking into them and providing a contrast to the copper.

You finished your cup and set it down as you stood. You reached for it. It hadn't been put on the wall too long ago and already it was being taken down again.

“Maybe we can prevent that," you said. "Can't make people not get addicted to whatever the hell Silco out in the waters but... He's got money and money buys muscle and more muscle for him means less for us and that means we lose."

Babette reached to place her hand on your arm.

“Do what you have to do," she said softly, voice free of judgment.

"I just want to protect my kids."

"I know.”

"We're losing anyway."

"We are.”

You turned your head towards her. “You're supposed to be talking me out of this."

"I would be if you were being stupid,” she said before she patted your arm and walked back behind her desk. "You should take to wearing it again. It suits you.”

The door to your apartment creaked as it opened.

You never got it fixed. You weren't sure you ever would. Far too paranoid, especially these days. It was an old comfort.

Ekko looked up immediately. He put down the tools he was using to fix up an old music box you had tucked away and ran towards you. He wrapped his arms around your torso and shook your footing with the force of his hug.

“Where were you?" he asked, burrowing his face into your clothes.

You hugged him back, rethought the words you'd been thinking over for the past half a day.

"I got a tip on Powder," you told him.

You could feel his breathing halt. He stiffened at the words. You expected nothing less. In contrast, you actually expected more.

"Was it real?" his voice cracked with the words.

“Yeah, yeah, it was."

He pulled away from you to look up at your face. For the first time in four months, you saw real hope in his eyes.

"Where is she? Why isn't she here?"

"She is with an -" a little, half white lie couldn't hurt too badly- "old friend. She's okay but she doesn't want to talk right now. I think she's still processing everything but maybe soon."

He nodded. "Okay, okay. What about Vi?"

"We still don't know, little man." you told him.

His face didn't crumble but that little spark of hope flickered, dimmed for a moment.

"How's your progress?" you asked, changing the subject with a gesture towards the music box.

He inhaled sharply and his lips thinned into a pale line as he clamped them between his teeth for a moment. He took your distraction willingly.

“What'd you do to that thing?" he asked. "This should have been a day's fix, maybe two. I've been working on it for nearly a week and it's still not done! You throw it into a wall or something?"

"Something like that."

He gave you a look filled to the brim with judgment. "Why would you do a thing like that? I thought you were supposed to be responsible?"

“Are you going to criticize me or are you going to fix it?” you asked him.

"I can multitask," he said. “Seriously though, what the hell did you do to it?"

You walked over to the half fixed box. “It was a gift from an ex" you told him. “We split and I had a couple drinks too many."

"You're not a violent drunk" he said as he grabbed his tools and sat down.

"No, I'm not." you said.

"So?"

"So, what?" you said as you sat across from him.

“What happened that was so bad you broke it?" he asked.

You sucked in a breath. “That is a story for when you’re older.”

His brows furrowed as he examined you with careful eyes. "You never say that."

"Well, I'm saying it now." You reclined in your chair. "What do you want to eat tonight? You wanna cook something or order out?"

He didn't look up this time as he simply shook his head softly with a small smirk beginning to crawl into his lips. "Is that even a question?"

Yeah, no denying it. You made the right call. He was too good of a kid to lose anything else. They all were.

You wrapped your arm around his shoulders and guided him out of the apartment.

“She misses you,” you told him.

“I miss her too,” he said as he let his body lean against you for support.

It was a support you would always provide. You’d provided it for years before now and would continue to do so.

You had loved Ekko since before he was even born, just like you’d done with Powder and Vi. You loved Claggor and Mylo the moment they stepped into your life.

You loved all your kids.

A memory came to you.

Fari dressed in a loose, yellow dress covered with an oversized brown jacket. Her white hair was put into dozens of braids, some framing her face as bangs, others pulled up into a thick ponytail, most of them having some metal beads on them.

She was sat back in a plush chair. Her hands were dangling in her lap, completely limp between her knees.

“What am I going to do?” she asked herself softly.

“About what?” you asked as you were coloring in your waterline.

She flinched, like she hadn’t noticed you were there. You raised an eyebrow towards her in the mirror in concern.

Her eyes flickered away from yours. She spaced out for a moment. Her gaze was on the floor in front of her.

Her fingers twitched. She spoke, “I’m pregnant.”

Your head immediately whipped around to her causing the lipstick you’d been putting on to smear across your face.

“What?”

“I don’t know what to do.”

“Do you know who the dad is?”

“No!” she said. Her voice dropped as she leaned closer to you, “I didn’t even think I could get pregnant.”

You placed your hand on top of hers. “We’ll figure something out, okay?”

She squeezed your hand like a lifeline, much like you were doing to her son now. Only you were holding his hand so tight so you wouldn’t lose him in the crowd.

“Hey, Jericho,” you said as you walked closer to the vender. The man sent a smile over his shoulder as he rolled some fish over a grill. “What do you want, kid?”

“Can we get some legs and calamari?” Ekko asked.

“Legs and calamari,” you echoed back to the man. It took but a moment before two boxes were slid over to the two of you. “Thank you, kindly.” You placed the hold on the counter where it was quickly scooped up.

On the walk back to the apartment, you stopped and grabbed a bottle of scotch. You knew it wasn’t the best idea but hell, you’d have a rough couple months.

You uncorked the bottle with your teeth. You got it out from between your jaws with two fingers that weren’t wrapped around the neck of the bottle and pocketed it. You took a swig and sighed as the deep, earthen tones burned your throat. With your next inhale it was a welcomed icy feeling that replaced the burn.

“Can I try?” Ekko asked.

You looked down at him with a raised brow. You let your head to tilt to the side as you told him, “You’re not going to like it,” but still gave him the bottle.

With the hand not holding your own, he brought the bottle to his lips, shoving the boxes of food beneath his arm.

His brows shot up and his lips curled backward. He quickly turned away and spat the liquid onto the street causing several people to yell as they jumped away.

“Gross,” he croaked out.

You took the bottle back with an amused smile.

“How do you drink that?” he asked.

“You learn to love it,” you answered simply.

“If I have to learn how to, I don’t think it’s worth loving,” Ekko said.

You laughed lightly at that. “One day, I’ll make you a daiquiri. You’ll like that better.”

“Uh-huh, yeah, sure,” he said, sarcasm lacing his words.

“You will,” you assured him.

Back at the apartment, the food was quickly devoured by the two of you. It was still warm and greasy and left a slight film in your mouth after eating it but exactly what you needed. It was a comfort.

Ekko took one leg and more calamari leaving you to finish off the other two legs and the leftover calamari in the box which was mostly just crunchy, cooked batter.

The entire time you were sipping on your scotch. You drank straight out of the bottle. Not a classy habit but you weren’t in public and you were the only one in the house who was going to drink it so it didn’t really matter.

You felt lose. It felt like oil had been poured on all your joints, your muscles, even your eyelids with the way it felt so easy to just let them close.

Ekko’s arms wrapped around you. You started but didn’t hesitate for a second to wrap your own around him.

You heard him sniffle. You opened your eyes only to see the world blurred. That’s when you realized that there were several streaks down your face, some warm, others turning cold.

“We’re gonna be okay,” you told him. “She’s gonna be okay too.”

Ekko nodded against your shoulder, smearing some tears against your neck but you didn’t mind.

Silence befell the both of you and stretched over several long minutes. Neither of you dared to let go of the other.

It was a relief to find Powder but it was a sting of pain to not have her with you. Until you had her for longer and Ekko got to see his best friend again, it wouldn’t sink in that she was truly alright. That you hadn’t lost everyone you loved dearly that night.

Ekko pried himself away from you. The back of his hand went to wipe underneath his eyes. He sat.

Both of you looked at the wall before you. A bookshelf was pressed against it harboring several books, a lot of records, and a couple knickknacks.

“I can’t fight this battle anymore,” you told Ekko. “I’m getting old. I’m tired. I’ve got to take care of you and Powder. I can’t do it anymore. No more late nights. No more coming home with the shit beat out of me. I promise.”

All the boy beside you did was nod.

It wasn’t long before he was picking up a screwdriver and your music box.

You kept nursing your bottle of scotch. You didn’t fight the memories that came to you.

“One scotch on the rocks for you,” you said as you pushed a glass towards Silco.

He bowed his head in recognition and thanks as he picked it up. He had a notebook that he was writing away in. You spotted a couple drawings of what looked like fans.

“Whatcha working on?” you asked him.

“Felicia and I have been trying to come up with a way to get ventilation into the mines,” he said.

“That’s really fucking needed,” you said.

“I know, that’s why we’re doing it.”

“Harhar, no need to be a smartass. I was just trying to make conversation with you because you tend to make it next to impossible.”

For the first time that night, his eyes looked up at you. A gorgeous sea foam green that made your eyes widen just a bit and your ear twitch for a second as you fought to keep a straight face.

In the several weeks you’d worked at The Last Drop, Silco had never looked at you head on. His head was always slightly downturned, always occupied with one thing or another.

“I don’t make it impossible,” he said. “We talk almost every time I’m here while you’re working.”

“Oh, yeah, because it’s such interesting shit we talk about. ‘Hey, Silco, what would you like today?’ ‘A scotch on the rocks’— sometimes you make it interesting and go— ‘with a twist this time.’ ‘Alright, here’s you’re scotch.’ and sometimes, sometimes you won’t just bow your head in thanks you’ll actually say it! What thrilling conversations we have!” you said, absolutely taking the piss by doing a downright awful impression of Silco’s sooth, sultry voice.

Silco’s brows furrowed just a hair and his lip quirked up in the tiniest show of a smile. He shook his head, bangs rocking from side to side as he did.

A part of you believed that was the man he still was, buried deep down. A part of you was probably naive and holding onto what should be a long dead belief in people’s ability to be good.

It was something that should be gone, living down in the Lanes. The Undercity was full of crooks and thieves and downright despicable people.

You knew that well. Everyone down here did.

You also knew it was full of people with caring souls, good advice, sweet words, and sweeter actions. It was a place of community and strength.

No matter what happened, everyone banned together.

If Piltover wanted it to be an us vs them society, that’s what it would be. The relationship between the two places more unstable and more toxic than the mines and the air within them.

The Undercity was filled with people you cared about, even if most of them were gone. There were two right in front of you but you couldn’t reach out far enough to touch them.

Powder was now more traumatized and scared than ever. Why wouldn’t she come with you? She clearly missed you and Ekko. You’d helped raised the girl since she was born.

Sometimes it was easy to forget that Silco had too. He’d been there the day Powder was born, pacing from side to side as Felicia screamed in the other room.

He had been there nearly every day that you had until she was five years old. Until that day on the bridge that you loathed to think about where you’d never seen him again until yesterday.

There was some part of the man you knew in there. You felt it. You hated that you did.

Why couldn’t it just be easy? Why couldn’t he just have changed completely until you didn’t recognize him at all. Not physically, not mentally, not a damn thing to be seen of the man you knew.

Five, almost six years without seeing him and he was so different but still the same. You supposed you probably were too.

“Shit!” Ekko swore as he struggled to keep the screwdriver in place.

You’d grown softer with these kids. If it weren’t for them, you’d probably still be. . .

Who the fuck were you kidding? No matter what happened as soon as you were faced with Silco again, you probably still would have surrendered.

You weren’t strong enough to hate him truly. No matter how much your mind was telling you that you should be.

[edgeray]

mygod that siren Arlecchino fic you did is *chef's kiss* IMMACULATE!!! might i request a continuation, mayhaps? Arle mentioned that she'd follow the reader as they sail, so maybe she misses them and either tries to climb onto the boat or the pier where they're docked to see them again? either hurt/comfort or fluff, the rest is up to you!!! love your work and thank you for fueling my Arlecchino obsession :] also i might pop back in here once in a while, may i be moth anon?

The Sea's Calling Pt. 2

(Arlecchino x Fem! Reader)

A/N - Part 1 link here. Yes, you definitely can be a moth anon! Hi :D. I already added you to the anon list. To other anons that have requested and I haven't gotten to, I do see your requests and if you gave yourself an emoji/name I already added you ^^. Anyways, back to moth anon. <333 I'm so glad you enjoyed my siren Arlecchino fic! As my first request I was kind of nervous about it but I'm glad that you enjoy! I'm also really glad that you sent this request! I did always want to write a part 2 but didn't have the opportunity until now. Thanks moth anon, for the reuqest and for enjoying my works!!  If you couldn't tell, I love the idea of found family pirates. One Piece did this to me. The ending turned out to be self-indulgent, forgive me moth anon ;) Even though it's short, this ended up being one of my favorites. Hope you like this one! Content warnings / info - monster x human, arle is ooc bc she's a siren, fem! reader bc pt.1 has fem! reader, suggestive at the end, 1.2k words

You used to think that the most beautiful thing out there was the sky and its stars–to you, nothing was more mesmerizing than them. They are so alluring despite holding this mystique, and they've guided humans on their naval journeys and inspired all kinds of stories of their origins. The stars were all that kept you company, even on the lonliest and coldest nights.

Now, however, the stars aren't your only company. 

“Guys, I'm going to go back to the ship. Don't wait up on me too much,” you to your fellow pirates as you stand up from the stool. You drop off some extra coins on the baa counter, in order to compensate for the plate that you will be ‘borrowing.’ You pick up the plate of your half-eaten slice of meat pie and sandwich and head towards the exit before one of your crew mates stops you, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder.

“Turning in already? C'mon, stay a little bit. We've got enough money for a few more rounds of beer,” he says with a boisterous laugh. You chuckle lightly but shake your head. 

“No can do, sorry. Got something to do.”

“Uh huh, like your little siren girlfriend?” Another crew member states, her teasing smile widening as you flush. 

“One more? Jackie hasn't finished his story!”

“Let the darned woman go see her darn girlfriend, Goldie,” another gruffed with a shake of his head. 

“Fine, fine, go on ahead. Tch, when will I get my own smoking hot siren girl?” Goldie huffs, and you snort. Likely never, but you don't tell him that.  

“Thanks, I'll be back,” is all you say before rushing out of the door, nearly tipping over the plate before you balance it again. You wave them off and you make your way back to the docks. The walk is both short and long, and each step you take is filled with the excitement that buzzes through you. 

Even after these months, being able to spend time with her feels like bliss, like you have just found treasure. Sometimes, you forget she's a siren, she's ever so endearing and follows you around like a puppy. Oftentimes, when you're on the boat, you talk to her as she lingers by. The night after you first met the siren your crew had banned you from jumping into the waters because you had developed a cold which infected a good chunk of the crew; the cold wasn't severe for anyone but still. Since you can't be in the water, you often just talk to her from the railings and she answers. 

It's only when you're docked when you can finally touch her, but those times come rare. It can take days, sometimes weeks to reach an island to dock at, but when you do, you always take the time to sit by the shore. 

Finally, you arrive at the pier. “Arle?” You call out, and you see a ripple in the water. Grinning, you walk to the ends of one of the docks, setting down the plate a bit away from you. You remove your shoes and set them far away. Perching on the dock, your feet dip into the cold waters and you shiver.

You see something gleam in the corner of your eyes, the familiar shine of her scales. You then remember the food, and you start. “Wait, Arle don't splash–”

Too late. Something erupts from the waters and launches into you, a cold, heavy weight thrusting into your body making you tumble on your back on the dock. Pressed between the wooden planks and the creature that straddles you, you can't help but laugh and raise your hand up to her face, the now drenched food forgotten entirely. 

“Hey gorgeous,” you say as you stroke her cheek gently. She's the most beautiful treasure that you found among the seas. Arlecchino gazes down on you, her red pupils glistering as her arms wrap around your torso. She purrs, little fangs apparent as the tip of her tongue peeks out with her open-mouth smile. 

“Missed you,” is the first thing she says, before she leans her body against you, nuzzling her face into your neck. Your clothes get soaked from her, but you pay no mind. You stroke her wet hair, carding your fingers through her strands before kissing the top of her head. 

“I missed you too. Did you eat recently?” 

Sometimes she'd disappear for a few nights to search for another wandering ship for her meals but she never fails to find your ship again. You haven't seen her for a couple days before you docked her. 

Arlecchino nods. “Human food?” She questions. Her tail flicks, thumping against the wood out of eagerness. Although she enjoys the taste of cooked meats, beef especially, you don't believe it's as nutrition dense as… well, the main source of her diet, and it's hard to serve her cooked meat while on sea due to the issue of storing meat on ships. So, cooked meat has always been a treat for her. 

You nod. “You want to try?” 

She lets out an affirmative purr, and you help her sit upright in your lap. It's always a bit difficult considering she has a tail instead of legs, but she maneuvers her tail to encircle your waist, and you support her back with one of your arms. You silently mourn for your now soggy sandwich as you reach for the plate, using her tail as a flat surface. 

“What is it?” 

“Meat pie and a sandwich.” You take the fork and dig out the meat from the meat pie. Balancing the tender piece of beef on your utensil, you carefully guide it to her mouth. 

“Careful, it's hot. And don't bite the fork this time,” you gently warn her as she eats it. She squirms a bit in your lap, an indicator that she's pleased with the taste. 

“More?” You chuckle, adoring the cute plea in her eyes. 

You scrape out more of the meat until she's eaten all of the pie filling, leaving you to eat the pie crust. You're still peckish, so you start eating your sandwich, but not before fishing out the thick slice of ham from it, and giving it to her. If it meant you could watch the way her expression lights up again forever, then you would endlessly eat ham-less sandwiches and savor every cheese and vegetables sandwiched in between wet bread. 

“Did you like it?” You ask in between chews as she leans her head against your shoulder. She nods, and leans up again to place featherlight kisses on your neck. With the cold droplets of water and her frigid lips, it tickles you and you giggle. So adorable. 

You freeze up when you feel her fangs prick your skin and she looks up to you for permission. Another mating bite? You nod, wordlessly giving her permission, and you suck in a harsh breath as you feel her teeth sink in. Purrs vibrate coarse through her mouth as she pulls away, lapping at the mark and the texture of her tongue invokes a throaty groan from you, your body trembling with pleasure. 

Arlecchino leans away, but in her eyes, hunger burns in them. Her hands take purchase on your hips and she pushes your back against the planks. Her tail unwinds around your torso and instead coils around your ankles, securing them together.  

“H-here?” You question, flushing. Her hands wander lower, the sharp nails trailing lower to your thighs, where faint scratches scatter. 

The night that you first met her, she sang so beautifully for you. Tonight, you repay her back, singing out her name so tastefully. 

[mosneakers]

Alex: [Smiles warmly] Hi Coraleye…

Coraleye: [Smiles back] Hi Alex…

Alex: Ready for one last take before we officially call it a wrap?

Coraleye: I guess so! Alex: So how’s life treating you now? You adjusting okay?

Coraleye: Oh… well it's been a whirlwind, to say the least, heh. But I’m finding my footing again. Finally finishing up school. Just barely keeping my head above water some days, but yeah, I’m getting by. Trying to find my new normal.

Alex: [Nods thoughtfully] I want to talk about that a little bit. You’ve had to deal with the aftermath of everything that happened on election night. Do you remember when Cam and I came out to visit you in Brindleton Bay?

Coraleye: Mhm. I sure do. You interviewed some girls I went to school with.

Alex: So, Mackenzie, Briella, Logan… I’m not sure how much you’re aware of, especially with how quickly the media coverage was shut down after election night. But I’ve gotta ask—have you reached out to Coraleye at all since then? Offered any kind of support?

Logan: [Quickly glances at Mackenzie] I’m not sure if we got the chance to reach out yet, have we? Mackenzie:[Feigning innocence] She hasn't filled us in completely, but we’ve heard bits and pieces... Briella: We heard about her and her boyfriend. They broke up, right? [Big grin] Life has a cruel way of teaching us lessons!

Mackenzie presses her lips together, appearing to hold back a laugh, but finally cracks as a sharp cackle spills out.

Mackenzie: Oh my mod, Briella, stop! You can't say that! I just love you. So sorry about her, she's so crazy. Anyways, yeah. We wish her the best. I hope it all works out for her, I really do.

Cam: Well, I think that will probably do it for now, thank you ladies. Alex: Cam's right, thank you for your time. We'll be in touch. Have a happy Harvestfest.

Several weeks later, Britechester-

Alex: Cam and I try not to get too involved with work matters, but I'll be honest, that interview was upsetting. I wonder if they'd still be snickering if they saw what you've been through in these past few months.

Coraleye: Nah, they're the least of my worries. Pretty sure I got the last laugh when it comes to them. [Mischievous grin]

Alex: I'm in awe of your optimism, Coraleye. After all this, you’re really not bitter? I mean, look at Tycho—he lied, tried to erase your memories. And you still take the high road?

Coraleye: Oh no, please don’t get me wrong, Alex! I definitely went through—and sometimes still go through—my naughty phase, from time to time. Alex: [Leans in] You have my attention... Coraleye: Maybe it was for revenge, or a way to cope, or maybe deep down I was just really lonely and had a void to fill. Either way, it got me through some dark times. Perhaps you should book a follow-up interview with Briella, ask her if she found my panties in her boyfriend's room yet. [Waves at camera, winks, and mouths, ‘Hey, Pierce!’] Alex shakes his head amusedly and softly chuckles.

Alex: Damn! You really don't mess around. I'm guessing this doubles as punishment for Tycho as well?

Coraleye: Nope. Actually, his punishment is even better. I'm giving him exactly what he wants. After this documentary is over with, I'm erasing all of our shared memories together. He wanted to mess with my mind so badly, I'll do it for him. Alex: And how do you do that?

Coraleye: Through a spell, of course. You didn't forget that I'm a spellcaster, did you? I'll put the memories in an amulet and give it to our sage of untamed magic. They'll perform a ritual to destroy the memories. Alex: Wow. Remind me to never break your heart... Coraleye: [Smiles] Oh, I will. Alex: [Sighs] Well... Last question we're asking everyone else: Is there any question that you have, after all of this, that still haunts you?

Coraleye: [Tilts head, as she pauses to think] Hmm… I’ve still got to write that paper on my ten-year plan, and somehow I feel even more lost than before. I guess it’s time to start figuring that out now.

[a-gnosis]

This week I've sat down with the script for Queen of the Dead. I've tried to write down all the remaining scenes to figure out in which order things should happen, if something needs to be added, and so on. I have some problems to piece together the Sisyphus arc with the Demeter arc. As it is now, Sisyphus tricking his way out of the Underworld happens about the same time as Demeter starts to deprive the earth of all fertility.

What would work best for the narrative is if both arcs also are concluded at about the same time (that is, Sisyphus is caught as Zeus realizes that he has to placate Demeter). The problem is that several months need to pass before the situation with Demeter gets really serious (the humans still have the grain from their latest harvest to live on), and it doesn't make sense that the Underworld gods would just forget about Sisyphus for several months. Maybe they would if they got distracted by something else (Hades and Persephone are sort of in their honeymoon phase, so I suppose they could be less observant).

I have considered to take the Sisyphus arc out. That way the story would be finished much sooner. But it does serve its purposes for the plot, and if I take it out, I'll have to rewrite the story. I don't know if I want that.

[bottombaron]

So after staring into the middle distance for a couple days I'm ready to start discussing some theories I have before the season finale destroys us. They are all very wide-ranging in absurdity but I'll start with the one that I think has the most substance and therefore I think is most likely to happen. Also, I haven’t caught up with the tag yet so if someone already posted these theories, sorry! 

So here is Theory #1, known otherwise as,

Why (I think) I know how Laszlo is going to unfuck Guillermo

The solution, I believe, was stated at the very end of The Roast by Laszlo himself: 

FIRST THOUGHT, BEST THOUGHT

Laszlo has spent weeks deeply committed to solving a problem. He's wasted precious time trying to outthink his first (and probably best) solution – and I'm not just talking about his book sorting. Neither was Laszlo, not entirely at least. I actually do think he was focused at least a little bit on his books because that's kind of what happens when you're stuck on a problem. Your brain wanders to other much less taxing ordeals. Usually, as you solve that smaller problem, you find the solution to the thing you really want to solve. 

So what was Laszlo’s first idea?

All along Laszlo had the answer but Guillermo told him that he didn't think it would work, so Laszlo just didn't pursue it further. (We don't even know if Laszlo knows the circumstances of the test and why it didn't work. Just that Guillermo didn't approve that idea.) So then Laszlo wasted valuable time and energy trying to ~Science~ this problem instead of using his true best skill that was showcased in episode one of the season: his charm. His powers of persuasion (the classical art of bullshitting, as it were) is his true super power. (Sadly, it’s not science. He doesn't really have the patience for science tbh).

But, no, rly, he should bullshit his way thru this. That's what he does best. He can outthink Nandor easily. (well….maybe. with the time spent on his experiments, Nandor could have the advantage of several weeks, if not months, to figure things out beforehand, as dense as he is) He should concoct a bullshit so impenetrable that it unfucks Guillermo from Derek and refucks him to Nandor. 

Further foreshadowing of this you ask?

(this whole season is dedicated to ‘plans’ it’s crazy how much A Plan pops up. maybe i’ll dedicate a separate post to collecting them all)

But alas! The test that The Baron did proved this wouldn’t work, right!?

Well here's some free additional theories to how Laszlo could solve that hiccup:

1. Laszlo figures out (and solves) the reason why The Baron/Neighbor test didn't work in the first place.

There could be any number of factors of why The Baron's neighbor blew up. It could be that The Baron is all that more powerful than the average vampire and so his bite gives an extraordinary fill of uh...vampire-ness? and Derek, being so young and weak, doesn't do much at all. Maybe it has something to do with The Sire. If The Baron was turned by the first being ever affected by vampirism, then maybe that vampirism is slowly depleted the further down the line you go. Derek is probably very far removed from The Sire which means he cannot transfer much of that affliction onwards. Nandor, if he was turned by The Baron (one removed from The Sire) or someone similar, explains how he is so powerful, hopefully tho he wouldn’t have too much power to possibly overwhelm Guillermo's half-a-virgin body (and yes I did like how kinky that sounded when I wrote it). It doesn't really matter the exact reason as long as Laszlo can convince Guillermo to try it and he has a relatively decent chance of surviving it. (convincing Guillermo to go thru with this plan overall is probably going to be the most trouble actually. you don't easily forget a guy exploding in your face)

2. Something to do with the experiments. (or the Nadja’s bait-and-switch tactic she used to catch The Baron/Guillermo from The Roast)

I have a larger theory on the experiments and why I think there's still one in the house, but that's for later. During The Roast, Nandor is pretty convinced that the mutant Guillermo is the real one (despite one pretty big glaring error: he has no glasses. none of the experiments need glasses...), Laszlo might have been testing this theory by having The Baron bring his body to Nandor in the first place in order to see how convinced Nandor would be by it. This might be enough for Laszlo to try to use a duplicate of Guillermo for Nandor to bite. The duplicate will not explode (probably?) due to only being a hybrid of Guillermo's blood and an animal…or something(one) else pretending to be Guillermo… (and if it does, maybe Laszlo plans to shoo Nandor out of the line of sight in order for him not to see. And then you get the angst and drama of Guillermo literally using a scapegoat to take his 'sin' despite his reluctance to hurt innocent creatures)

But will the fake Guillermo actually convince Nandor? It's hard to say, and I love that threat of Nandor realizing that it's not the true Guillermo he bit and feeling even more betrayed. Maybe Laszlo concocts a whole ambiance to the event in order to sell the lie. It has to be special right?

So there's dim lights and candles and (fake) Guillermo is laid out in Nandor's coffin and there's this whole presentation element to it that was left out of Guillermo's turn with Derek. It's more like the fantasy that Guillermo probably always had of being turned by Nandor. It plays out like a romantic love scene. But Guillermo is asleep or has his eyes closed and won't talk or maybe only makes small noises and Nandor's very upset abt this. Laszlo is probably hovering too and Nandor doesn't like that either but Laszlo insists he must be there and it's now it's all awkward and wrong, kind of like how Guillermo felt before he was bit by Derek. (now it’s like Nandor is the bull cucking Laszlo in front of him) Nandor goes thru with it and bites Guillermo and is rushed by Laszlo so he doesn't get to drink or drink too much of his blood and there's fumbling with trying to get his own blood into Guillermo's unresponsive mouth.

Or maybe Nandor finds out because Guillermo's blood is disgusting and he either knows or had hoped it would be good tasting*. or that Guillermo just lays there and there's no reciprocation of desire. But maybe he just doesn't find out and once it's over he expects to be able to lay with Guillermo or otherwise be there for his turning but Laszlo quickly rushes him out of his own room and closes the door behind him.

So now Nandor feels all the same despondency that Guillermo had felt with his turn with Derek. Like this big special moment he's built up for years was a complete dud. Like he missed out on something truly magical and he doesn't know why. And Guillermo will feel like shit too, for tricking Nandor. Laszlo isn't happy either. But it worked and they all just have to live with it. Meanwhile this act that was meant to make Nandor's and Guillermo's bond stronger, only serves to create even greater distance between them. 

Re*: evidence that Guillermo's blood might taste 'different':

3. ANYWAYS. that was theory two. lets talk about theory 3.

WITCHES.

I actually think there's good reason Laszlo has divorced Science and is now going to have an affair with Magic. It's exactly when Nadja says 'has this hex turned me into an uggo' that Laszlo comes to life and exclaims ‘that's it!’. If science wasn't the solution, maybe magic is. It's not like they don't know some witches, or that, at least to a degree, witches actually have some power. (specifically the power to look, vaguely, like someone else.) I'm not certain of the specifics but there's a chance Laszlo could be turning to magic to solve his problems. This would also bring Nadja's storyline more relevant and in focus for the season. The thing I like the most about this theory? Episode 9 describes being invited to a manor owned by someone named Morrigan. Morrigan is a Celtic goddess of war and fate that was probably the inspiration for Arthurian legendary sorceress, Morgan le Fay. (Laszlo's name may also be connected to Arthurian legend, Lancelot. but that probably doesn't mean anything.)

So! That's my three extra theories attached to this one big theory that Laszlo is going to go 'back to the beginning' and use his first thought to solve this. Go with his gut. His first solution was his best solution, all along.

…He simply needs to convince Nandor to turn Guillermo.

The, uh, details of this plan may be a lot more complicated than it suggests.

[universecorp]

Heartbeat pt.2

Summary: After starting a situationship with your best friend from high school, things start to become complicated. Especially when you start to catch feelings.

Jaehyun x Reader

Haechan x Reader (In pt2 and 3 ) w.c: 12.2k

Genre: Comedy, Romance, Smut, Angst, Fluff

Warnings: Protected sex (they wrap it before they tap it, what a concept!, Mentions of oral (f.receiving ), sexual themes, drinking, degrading (not during sex though so proceed with caution), a couple arguments, Jaehyun is kinda dick in this part sorry, rejection, trying to kiss someone without their consent, if i missed anything please comment but i think that’s it!

Playlist: ♡

<- Previous Part

It was about a month after the beach and you were on one of  several failed dates. You wondered if you were doomed to just never have a partner at this point as you walked away from your date. You were also starting to think that maybe Jaehyun raised your standards too high, but you also knew your worth and knew what you deserved. Speaking of him, he was calling.

“Hey,” You sighed out, hopping on the bus back to your campus.

“Oh, you sound disappointed. Was it that bad?” You could only chuckle at how even over the phone he could tell when something was wrong. That was just good best friend behavior you figured.

“It wasn’t bad, he's just a little self absorbed. The whole time he just kept talking about how he was valedictorian in high school and all his awards and accolades.” You explained at a hushed volume out of respect for the other riders. “Then he went on to talk about the game he’s developing and how it’s already been kickstarted by some sponsors. The game part was interesting but it was the damn “me” show about high school when he’s a whole junior in college.” 

“Yeesh, sounds boring. Well I have something that might cheer you up and get you some action.” Jaehyun spoke, there was some rustling in the background so you figured he was still in bed. 

“I’m listening.”

“Alphas are having a party tonight, theme is cartoon characters, so if you take the bus to my place we could go out and go shopping, pregame, and then head over.” That sounded intriguing and like just what you needed to forget about this yet again unsuccessful date. 

“I do need to stop at my dorm for makeup though, so can you pick me up there?” Jaehyun made an affirmative humming sound from the other side of the line. 

“Yeah, I'll be there in ten.” 

—————————————————————————

The party was in full swing, and you could successfully say that your pregaming had you feeling good. You were dressed as Bloom from Winx Club You managed to find a blue minidress in your closet so that eliminated part of your outfit. When you and Jaehyun went shopping you also found some wings and a tiara and before you knew it your costume  was complete. 

At the moment you were dancing with some guy you couldn’t remember the name of; loving the way his hands felt on you. He had his chest to your back and was using his hands to help you grind back against him. The song wasn’t even that kind of song but in your state it just felt right. Everything felt perfect and everything about your dance partner was so attractive, his jet black hair, his sun kissed skin, and the moles scattered across his face only added to his beauty. His voice sent shivers down your spine as he whispered things in your ear the things he wanted to do to you and you couldn’t deny that you wanted those things done to you. You were on cloud nine, feeling numb enough to not notice the pair of eyes that was watching you and your dance partner, but conscious enough to know that you wanted the man behind you. 

“You’re so gorgeous, can’t believe you didn’t come with anyone.” Ok, maybe you had failed to mention that you came to this party with Jae, but you weren’t together so that didn’t really matter. Besides he left you the second you walked through the doors, so as far as you were concerned you were just friends who happened to be at the same party.

“I could say the same for you too, honestly.” You weren’t lying either, maybe he was a serial killer and that's why he didn’t have someone. People like him did tend to be serial killers, charismatic, handsome; were you dancing with a serial killer? 

 “Let’s go back to my place babe,” he whispered in your ear, voice low and raspy, “I’ll show you a better time than this lame party.” Saying no was the last thing on your mind as you allowed the pretty stranger to lead you away from the crowds and loud bass reverberating through the cramped house. Even if he did turn out to be a serial killer at least you got to have a good time before you died.

—————————————————————————

You could confidently say that Donghyuck wasn’t a serial killer. You could only say that because you were in his bed being given what you could only classify as your best lay since Jaehyun and not dead in a field somewhere. Words weren’t the only thing he was smooth with, you could name about three other things on top of that. One of them was his dick, which was currently in you. Unlike most men you’ve fucked after parties, Donghyuck took his time with you; bringing you to orgasm once from his tongue and fingers before he finally entered you. Needless to say, you were in a state of pure ecstasy and didn’t want it to stop anytime soon. 

“Hyuck-, fuck, feels good…” Your nails were digging into the skin of his shoulders, no doubt leaving marks, but that seemed to only spur him on. You could feel every drag of his cock against your walls as he pulled out almost to the tip before thrusting back in roughly. You could hear every whimper and whine he was letting out which was slightly muffled by the pillow his head was buried in. Judging from the way he ate you out earlier, you could tell he was getting off of the fact that you felt good too and it almost stirred something in you. 

“You’re so gorgeous, you sound so pretty for me.” His voice was a bit husky in your ear, but still had that nasal lilt to it that you found so attractive. You could tell he was close by how his thrusts were starting to grow erratic and less calculated, somehow he was still managing to hit your g-spot dead on, despite his clear fatigue. As if he knew he wasn’t going to last long enough to pull another orgasm out of you, he quickly moved his hand between your bodies to start rubbing roughly at your clit. You couldn’t help the loud moan that came from you as he continued the onslaught of pleasure but moving his mouth down to your neck again to suck hickeys onto your neck. “Fuck, come on baby, give it to me.” It felt like his permission was all you needed to let go for a second time that night and only seconds later he was following you, moaning your name out into the silence of his apartment as his thrusts came to a stop. 

Donghyuck finally rolled off of you after a few minutes, five of which those seven minutes consisted of a slow makeout session as you came down from your highs. You could feel his eyes on you, so you turned to face him, giving him an awkward smile. “I’ll call an Uber.” You figured that’s why he was looking at you, and before you could exit the bed he grabbed your wrist.

“You hungry?” 

A pregnant pause.

“I could eat.”

—————————————————————————

Sitting in a Dennys at 2:00 AM is not how you expected your night to end. You and Donghyuck had spent the better part of an hour talking and getting to know each other. He was easy to talk to, and funny, you didn’t feel like you were forcing any of your reactions which made you feel a lot more at ease than usual.

“Wait, you're Haechan? The streamer?” Donghyuck nodded, shoveling a scoop of hash browns into his mouth. “That’s so fucking crazy, my best friend loves your streams. We used to fuck and I remember one time he got the notification for your stream and stopped mid fuck to watch you.” Donghyuck nearly choked on the strip of bacon he was munching on.

“Please tell me you’re joking.” You shook your head. “That’s so sick, did he at least like pick up where he left off while watching?” Another shake. 

“I had to push him on his back and ride him.” Donghyuck laughed loudly, catching the attention of most of the other late night eaters, but it was clear he didn’t care. 

“Now that I think about it, there was this one time I read a comment and it deadass said ‘I was fucking my girl and stopped to watch.’ I thought it was probably a troll, but that might’ve been him.”

You scoffed, shaking your head once again. “There’s no way that was him, he would never refer to me as ‘his girl’ it would be kind of funny if that was him though.” Donghyuck hummed in agreement, it was all he could do since he didn’t even know Jaehyun. 

There was a small awkward silence filled only with the sounds of plates clinking and light chatter from the other patrons. Donghyuck looked like he was having a debate with himself befofe hr finally opened his mouth. “Look, uhm, I don’t usually do this, I honestly don’t usually take my hookups to pre-breakfast either, but I was wondering if I could get your number?” 

You were a bit shocked. You thought maybe this was normal and Donghyuck was just one of those nice guys who treated his fucks to post coiatal meals. Hearing otherwise brought a bit of heat to your cheeks. 

“So uh… is that a no? Don’t leave me hanging here.”

“Oh no, wait no, I mean yes! Yes… you can have my number.” 

—————————————————————————

“You’ve been smiling at your phone a lot lately. You and big head aren’t fucking again right?” Minjeong was doing your nails on the floor of your dorm, and you were definitely making it hard since you were texting Donghyuck with the hand she was trying to get you to dry. 

“Of course not. I’m texting a new guy, I met him at that party me and Jae went to.” Minjeong perked up at the mention of a new guy. Talks like these reminded you of being a teenager, but they were always relaxing. You seriously owed Minjeong some girl time anyway with how far up Jaehyun’s ass you had been for the past year.

“So what’s his name?”

“Donghyuck, he goes here obviously, also get this, ” Minjeong leaned in “he’s that streamer that Jae likes a lot.”

“No way!?” Minjeong gasped, she accidentally swiped a little polish on your finger, but you didn’t mind.

You nodded, smiling basically ear to ear. “Yes way, and he’s so cute. He’s telling me how he wants to take me on a date this weekend!” You closed your phone to give Minjeong your undivided attention while she swiped acetone over her previous mistake.

“I’m happy for you, I know I was kind of an ass with all the ‘I told you so’, but I really just wanted you to be with  someone who treats you for what you’re worth.” You knew that, but hearing it felt really good. You always knew Minjeong was just looking out for you, but she also knew that whatever you felt for Jaehyun wasn’t going away like magic. Even now you sometimes felt a twinge of what you used to when he did certain things, but it wasn’t as strong as it was a month ago. 

“It’s ok Minnie, I know you only had my best interest.” You brought your nails hand up to blow on the wet polish. “Look on the bright side though, I went through all that and now I've learned my lesson. No more wasting time or energy on people who don’t deserve it.” 

Minjeong jostled your shoulder, “That’s my girl.”

—————————————————————————

 A week later you were with Donghyuck in his apartment, playing a co-op game called “it takes two” that he specifically bought for the date. He turned on his twitch to stream, but he left his mic off to enjoy the moment with you. He was ticking so many boxes and even Minjeong gave him the stamp of approval when he met her a couple hours ago. Everything today was perfect, he bought you flowers, ordered from your favorite takeout place and even surprised you with slippers for you to wear around the apartment. You had been seeing each other for about a month now so you figured he would be asking you to be his girlfriend soon, but you were in no rush. His gestures meant the world to you and even then just his presence was enough for you to feel satisfied. 

Now the two of you were snuggled up side by side, controllers in hand and your head on his shoulder. Nothing could ruin this moment, nothing except your phone which had been buzzing on the nightstand for a good two minutes. “Hey babe, I can pause if you wanna get that?” You looked up at Donghyuck with a small pout before shaking your head. You felt bad that whoever was calling you clearly didn’t get the memo that you were busy. 

“We can keep playing, I’ll talk and play, m’sorry.” Donghyuck waved it off as he waited for you to answer your phone. You rolled your eyes slightly when you saw Jaehyun’s photo, but still answered the facetime call. “What’s up loser?” You sounded less than enthused, but he should’ve expected that since you ignored his calls for two minutes. 

“God what crawled up your ass and died weirdo and why aren’t you showing your face?” Jaehyun scoffed as if his facetime screen wasn’t paused.

“Just the fact that you’ve been calling me for two minutes. What the fuck did you want? I’m kinda busy.” You cursed under your breath since you and Donghyuck failed the game stage for the fifth time. 

“First of all, I wanted to see if you wanted to grab dinner and come watch a movie, I’ll buy obviously. Second of all, if you’re gonna lie about being busy at least make it believable, I can hear you playing a game in the background.” Jaehyun had some fucking nerve assuming you would lie to him about being busy, but you weren’t gonna fight about it. You were gonna be civil. Even though Donghyuck had heard the way you and Jaehyun talked to each other before, he was a little annoyed that the other man was accusing you of lying. 

“Jae, I’m on a date and we’re playing a game, so I actually am very busy. 

“Wait… are you playing ‘it takes two’?” Jaehyun didn’t know about Donghyuck. He knew you had been on dates, but since he didn’t ask who with, you didn’t bother telling him it was Donghyuck A.K.A. his favorite streamer. 

“Yeah, with my date.” You knew you sounded like a bitch, but you didn’t care. Jaehyun had barely been hanging out with you and even then it seemed like he only wanted to when he was bored. You were trying to follow Minjeong’s and your own advice and stop wasting time on people that don’t deserve it.

“If you’re actually playing a game with your date, show your face and his, then show the tv.” You were so close to hanging up on Jaehyun, but when you saw the screen pause and suddenly your phone was being held up by Donghyuck. 

Donghyuck didn’t look happy. All of the irritation must have been building up to a point where even Jaehyun looked concerned. “Look, Jaehyun, I get it, you’re bored. I’m sure you miss having Y/N at your beck and call because you knew she would drop anything for you before.” Jaehyun opened his mouth to speak, but one glare from Donghyuck had him closing it immediately. “Those times are past and whatever sick game you’re playing at needs to stop. Got it?” The silence on the line was loud, Donghyuck knew he made his point. “Good. Now I’m going to go back to playing games with my girlfriend, enjoy the stream Jaehyun.” With that he pressed the end call button with a sigh and immediately after you were straddling the man.

“Girlfriend huh?” 

Donghyuck set his controller down and placed his hands on your hips, it was all he could do to look cool despite the blush rushing his face. “Yeah uhm… I was going to ask you later during pillow talk after some earth shattering sex, but this is cool too I guess.” 

You giggled, placing a kiss on his cheek. “This is cool too, don’t worry. We can still have earth shattering sex but now as boyfriend and girlfriend.” It was Donghyuck’s turn to giggle now. “Do you want to keep playing, we could even turn on the mic?” 

Haechan shook his head, “No I think it’s time for that earth shattering sex we were talking about.” You bit your lip trying to suppress a laugh, he was so goofy and hot at the same time, you didn’t understand how anyone could be capable of that. 

“I think that can be arranged…boyfriend.”

—————————————————————————

“He told you off?” Mark nearly yelled, catching the attention of several of the other students in the library. 

“Dude keep it down, we’re in a library.” Johnny reminded before focusing back on his music theory assignment. 

“Sorry, he told you off?” Mark asked again this time in a more suitable whisper.

“Yes, and she didn’t say shit bro, she just let him.” Jaehyun grumbled, taking a chip from the bag Johnny had managed to smuggle in. 

Johnny was pretty unamused with the entire situation, given that he asked if the two men wanted to study in the library, but had basically been talking the whole time. “Have you ever thought that maybe she’s over how you treat her. I know you think you’re like bestie of the year, but you literally evaded her feelings for at least 6 months just so you would have an easy fuck.” 

Jaehyun scoffed, “Remind me to stop telling you about my problems.” Johnny simply rolled his eyes before training them back on the score in front of him. 

“I mean he has a point. You knew she caught feelings a while ago, and your agreement was to break it off, but you kept everything up. Plus you were the one who kept fucking with her and being all domestic, she’s probably traumatized.” Jaehyun shot a glare at Mark; he did not come here to be ganged up on.

“She can’t be but so traumatized since she spends all her time with Haechan, or Donghyuck, whatever the fuck his name is.” Mark and Johnny looked ready to hit their heads against the table, but clearly this was a delicate situation that needed to be nurtured and cared for so that Jaehyun would actually get some sense.

“Jae, buddy, pal, old friend if you will.”

“Get to the point Johnathan.” 

Johnny sighed, “See the point is, she’s in a relationship now. You had your 15 minutes of fame where she basically avoided getting into something because she was holding out hope for you. Now, she’s tired of waiting. She wants something that makes her feel loved and worth it and frankly, your bare minimum effort of taking her back to your place to watch a movie and then fuck, isn’t cutting it.”

“Bars.” Mark fist bumped Johnny, adding an explosion sound effect at the end.

“You guys are losers. She didn’t seem to be complaining about the movie and fuck a couple months ago.” Mark cringed and Johnny simply shook his head at the way their friend could so shamelessly talk about you like that.

“Jaehyun, listen to yourself, you sound delusional. She may not have been complaining, but that’s also because if she did you would’ve had to break all of that off. You’re acting like she broke up with you when the two of you weren’t even together in the first place.” Johnny’s volume was starting to increase, but he couldn’t help it, he wasn’t the closest to you, but he refused to let Jaehyun disrespect you like this. “Also you literally only text or call her now when we can’t hang out. Do you think that makes her feel good?” Jaehyun opened his mouth, but Johnny cut him off. “Don’t answer that because I know you’re about to say some bullshit. You need to get with the program and stop treating her like some play thing that you decide to pick up everytime your other toys are broken!” Johnny finished closing his laptop and packing up his belongings. 

“Dude, where are you going?” Jaehyun groaned before looking at Mark who was following in Johnny’s actions. “You too? Come on!”

Mark just shook his head, slinging his backpack over his shoulder before speaking again. “Dude, you have some serious soul searching to do. We don’t mind if you vent, but the way you talk about and treat her is sick.” Jaehyun just clicked his teeth in response to the younger man. 

“Whatever.” Jaehyun stood up from the table and stormed out of the library.

“He needs to get laid.” 

“Totally.” Mark agreed.

—————————————————————————

“How in the fuck do you remember all of these bones?” Donghyuck asked, leaning over from behind you at all the flash cards you had laid out. 

“I print out flashcards for all of them and corresponding pictures and play matching games.” You responded, matching the humerus card to its corresponding photo. Donghyuck puffed out a laugh before kissing you on the cheek and walking into the kitchen to assess what he could make for dinner.

“So do you want ramen or ramen tonight?” He asked, peeking out his head from behind the cabinet. 

“Oh, what about ramen? I saw a recipe for it the other day.” 

Donghyuck hummed while grabbing two packets out of the cabinet. “Sounds good!” 

You and Donghyuck had been spending a lot more time together since you officially got together. Most nights were spent at his apartment, to the point where he cleared out a drawer as well as closet space for some of your clothes. You hadn’t heard much from Jaehyun, but you weren’t surprised. You heard from Mark that he had been moody lately so you just figured he was in some funk he needed to get over. 

“Babe, how mad would you be if I got lazy and ordered chicken instead of cooking.” Donghyuck materialized behind you at some point, startling you. He laughed a little at your shocked state, not for long though as he brought his hands down to your shoulders and began massaging them, relieving all your tension. 

“I would be a little upset because you said I could pay for the next meal.” You craned your neck to look up at him, putting on your best pout. Donghyuck made a few dramatic facial expressions as if he was a cartoon character trying to resist something. You played along, jutting your bottom lip out farther and making your eyes bigger and as if you had shocked him he went flying back. You turned around to see him on the floor clutching his heart and couldn’t help but giggle at his dramatics.

“Girlfriend pout, very effective, health level critical.” Donghyuck made his voice more scratchy as he writhed around on the floor. He made eye contact with you and you shot him another pout which seemed to do it since he went limp on the floor, sticking his tongue out as an ending flourish. 

You stood up from the table and joined Donghyuck on the floor. You leaned down to connect your lips to his cheek and he sat up so quick you almost bumped foreheads. 

“Kiss of revival, full health restored!” 

“You’re such a dork.”

“Yeah your dork.” Donghyuck stated matter of factly you couldn’t help but nod in agreement as you placed another kiss on his lips this time. 

“Yes my dork, now do you want soy garlic or plain?” Donghyuck looked at you as if he was offended. “Soy garlic it is, go make some rice dork, I’ll order some kimchi too since we ran out.” 

“I like the sound of that.” Donghyuck hummed out, kissing your shoulder.

“Of course you do, it’s hard to forget how much you like kimchi, you’ve gone through two of those big ass jars in a month. It’s a bit concerning actually, how is your stomach not fucked up? 

Donghyuck made a sound of disagreement, which made you raise an eyebrow. Did he even hear anything you said?

“No not that, I liked when you said ‘we ran out’ s’cute, like we’re married.” You didn’t even realize you said that which made you blush, maybe you were getting a little too comfortable. 

Obviously Donghyuck didn’t mind, he seemed to like the pace you were moving at, and you did too, but you didn’t realize how easily you were slipping into the domesticated lifestyle. It wasn’t necessarily bad, but it was just surprising, you never thought you would act like that with anyone other than Jaehyun. Now that you were here and got to share it with someone that actually wanted you, it felt nice.

“Marriage is a little extreme.” You pulled up the delivery app on your phone, hoping the harsh light would conceal your blush.

“This early on, I suppose, yeah. After a year or two, though, maybe it won’t seem as extreme.” Donghyuck was now sitting behind you, his chin hooked over your shoulder. 

A small pause filled the air.

“Food’s ordered! I need to keep studying so you need to let go.”

Donghyuck whined loud and dramatically, the nasally sound which would probably be annoying to most made you smile. 

“Look, not all of us are nerdy CS majors.” You kissed his cheek before attempting to stand up and return to the table, but Donghycuk was weighing you down. “Hyuck, come on. The sooner you let me study, the sooner we can go to bed and cuddle.”

“What if I don’t want to cuddle?” His voice was suddenly darker which made you gulp a little.

“We can do that too, but not until I finish studying. The longer you keep me here, the longer you have to wait.” Donghyuck paused for a moment before ultimately letting you go. 

“You better give me the most mind boggling head later.” 

You couldn’t help but scoff as you sat back at the table, continuing your matching game. “I can do more than that, don’t worry. If you keep distracting me though, you won’t be getting anything.”  

“You wouldn’t dare.” Donghyuck was glaring at you from the sink where he was washing rice.

“Try me Donghyuck.”

It was all playful banter, but Donghyuck didn’t bother you after that. Unlike Jaehyun, he actually understood that you needed to pass your classes. You never realized how behind you always were until you were with Donghyuck. Anytime you needed to study he didn’t pressure you into keeping him entertained or rush your studying. Jaehyun did exactly the opposite and while it didn’t always bother you, there were definitely times you wished he wasn’t so pushy. 

After about 45 minutes your food finally arrived and you also felt like you were in a good enough position to stop studying. Your test was in a couple of days, but you needed to stay on top of everything so you didn’t fall behind. Donghyuck prepared both your plates while you put your flashcards away and the two of you ate in a comfortable silence before retiring to his room for the night . 

—————————————————————————

A month and a half later you were at another party. The end of the semester Greek life kickback was in full swing and Donghyuck of course knew a few people who were able to get the both of you in. Since you and Donghyuck were still together, you decided that you would spend your summer with him. Usually you would go home and Jaehyun would drive you to visit, but since the two of you hadn’t spoken since your last “fight” your plans changed. You and Donghyuck still planned to go home to introduce him to your parents at some point, but for now the two of you were basking in the last light of your honeymoon phase. 

Currently you and Donghyuck were outside by the fire pit, smushed together on a hammock as you nursed the shitty alcohol provided by the frat. You met a few of his friends that were in the frat, and all of you were enjoying the night together.

“Wait hold on, he took you out to denny's after and asked you out there?” Chenle, one of the frat brothers and Donghyuck’s friend, asked incredulously.

“Yes, I mean I just thought it was normal for him, but then he told me otherwise. It was kinda cute honestly.” You glanced over at Donghyuck who seemed less than amused with the topic.

“Dude you gotta work on your game.” Jeno commented, taking a sip from his cup.

“Where else was I gonna take her at 2 in the morning?” 

“He has a point.” Jaemin said from beside you. He was the reason you and Donghyuck were basically on top of each other on the hammock. 

“I mean maybe ask after sex like a normal person or order a pizza and ask. Who makes someone get up and go out after blowing their back out.” Chenle argued, spilling his drink slightly as he talked with his hands. 

“I was trying to impress her a bit, pizza is so cliche, also I was trying to make sure she didn’t dip after; pizza in the apartment gives someone the chance to dip.” 

You couldn’t help but giggle as they argued about you as if you weren’t there, but it was entertaining to watch them all go back and forth.

“Ok you have a point, she definitely could’ve dipped. Would you have dipped?” Chenle directed his attention back to you.

“I mean like you said I had just gotten my back blown out, so probably not.” 

“See! You could’ve done pizza.” Donghyuck rolled his eyes at his friend, but ultimately relinquished the fight by putting his hands up.

“I have to pee really quick, I’ll be back. Does anyone need another drink while I'm gone?” You asked as you struggled to stand up from the hammock.

“I’ll take one, just ask for one of the pitchers, they’ll give it to you if you mention my name.” You nodded at Jeno before making your way into the noisy house.

The music was so loud you could feel the house shaking around you, and pushing through all the sweaty bodies was making the experience all the more overwhelming. You knew there was a bathroom on the second floor that was only for frat members, but Jeno and Chenle told you no one would even notice you use it, let alone go upstairs. You regretted wearing a short dress since you had to pull it down with basically every step you took, but Donghyuck had gifted it to you, so it would’ve felt wrong not wearing it. After pushing through for about two minutes you finally saw the stairs, but before you could take the first step you felt someone grabbing your wrist.

“What the fuck!” You looked behind you to see who had the audacity and you almost wish you hadn’t. 

Jaehyun was there, holding your wrist before pulling you into his chest. He wrecked of alcohol and sweat, the smell leaving a sour taste in your mouth as you tried to pull away. 

“Y/N, I missed you. Where have you been?” His words were slurred and he wore a small smirk on his face. The same smirk that used to reel you in made you feel nothing, it honestly disgusted you. 

“With my boyfriend, now if you could let me go I need to pee.” 

“Still? Come on, we need to catch up.” Jaehyun’s grip on your wrist didn’t falter, no matter how much you tugged against his grip. 

“Jae, please let go.” You were trying to keep your voice firm, but you were starting to become distressed. You left your phone with Donghyuck so you couldn’t text him for help and the music was too loud to even think about screaming. You only had one option truthfully. “Jae, just let me use the bathroom and then we can talk.” Your ultimatum seemed to please him because he loosened his grip enough for you to slip away and up the stairs.

You locked the door immediately after you entered the bathroom. You hoped Jaehyun wasn’t so drunk that he wouldn’t try to come in, but you had no idea at this point. You looked across from the door, praying there was a window that you could yell out of to get your boyfriend’s attention, but when you were met with a white wall you lost all hope. For now you just focused on peeing, maybe Donghyuck would come inside and look for you after noticing how long you’d been gone. 

“Hurry up!” Loud banging on the door followed by Jaehyun’s slurred speech startled you as you were washing your hands. You hoped he hadn’t followed you, but of course he did, of course he was behind that door banging on it like a maniac. “If you don’t come out, I’m coming in!” 

You groaned loudly and opened the door, pulling the taller man in. He was still wearing that stupid smirk on his face as he looked down at you.

“You’re still so easy.”

“What?”

You couldn’t believe your ears. It really was a game to him at this point. He sounded completely sober, was he playing you this entire time?

“You sure you like this guy, you opened that door pretty easily. Just admit that you wanted to mess around like old times, I won’t be mad.” Jaehyun stepped closer to you as he spoke, cornering you to the point that your back was painfully pressed against the sink. “Let’s just start again, I’m sure you got over what was going through your head back then. Don’t you miss it? Don’t you miss me, miss being my girl?” He leaned in closer and you could feel your breaths mingling the closer he got to you.

You a few months ago might’ve reacted differently. You probably would’ve kissed him and fallen into his sheets just like every other time. Would’ve gone back to your dorm and cried to Minjeong and Ten like a baby. You were tired of falling and crying though. Tired of letting Jaehyun constantly have his way with you because he knew you would never say no.

“Get the fuck off of me!” Using all your strength you pushed him off. “You do not get to ghost me for almost two months and then suddenly decide you want me back in your life. You’re a selfish piece of shit who only wants to be around me when you’re bored or horny!” Jaehyun opened his mouth to speak but you cut him off. “I’m happy with Donghyuck and I'm sorry you can’t accept that, but it’s the truth. I’m not leaving him anytime soon and even if I did it won’t be for you.”

“You say that, but I’m sure when he breaks your heart like all the others, you’ll be back in my bed.”

“Fuck you!” You seethed before storming out of the bathroom. You could feel tears brimming in your eyes. You felt so stupid, at least you stood up for yourself, but he still knew how to play you like a fiddle and it infuriated you. 

You couldn’t make it all the way down the stairs before bumping into someone’s chest. You mumbled a quick apology as you tried to pull away but a pair of hands held firmly at your shoulders. Not again was all you could think as you tried to push whoever was holding you. “Get the fuck off!” You sounded like you were throwing a tantrum, but you had hit your limit after being cornered and then belittled by your so-called best friend.

 “Hey, babe, it’s just me, calm down? You were gone for a while and I got worr— hey why are you crying?” Ducking your head was the best attempt you could make at trying to hide from Donghyuck. It was futile but you didn’t want to really relive the things Jaehyun had said to you. “Baby, what happened?” 

“Nothing, let’s go back outside.” 

Donghyuck grimaced, but didn’t push any further as he took your hand. Pushing through the sweaty bodies wasn’t as bad this time with his hand warm in yours. You were scared Jaehyun would catch up with you in the kitchen, but hopefully he wouldn’t cause a scene seeing you with Donghyuck. Finally the two of you were back outside with Donghyuck’s friends. The air thankfully didn’t shift, despite your mood and it made it easier to take your mind off of what had happened earlier. 

—————————————————————————

“So you gonna tell me what happened up there?”  

The blinking from the turn signal felt much louder in the silence of the car. Red illuminated the car like a spotlight and it was pointed on you. You could either stay silent and pretend to sleep like you had been doing the entire ride home, or speak and confirm what Donghyuck already knew.

“It was stupid.” 

“You’re such a liar. Clearly it wasn’t that stupid if you won’t talk about it.” 

Silence.

He was right, to you it wasn’t stupid it sucked, but you didn’t want to get Donghyuck riled up. You knew if you told him he’d get pissed, although there was nothing he could do now since the part and Jaehyun were so far behind you.

“It was just Jae being an ass again. That’s all.” 

Out of the corner of your eye you saw his grip on the steering wheel tighten. 

“What did he do?” 

“Donghyuck it’s fin-”

“What did he do!?”

 You couldn’t help but flinch. His tone was harsh; it was the first time he’d ever raised his voice at you.  

“I’m not angry at you. I just want to know what happened.” Donghyuck sighed, features softening as he rubbed a stress-filled hand down his face. “I’m tired of him disrespecting you and our relationship.” 

“If I tell you… what are you gonna do?” Jaehyun was still your best friend at the end of the day. He pissed you off but no matter how horrible he was you couldn’t help but care for him. 

“It depends on what he did.” He glanced over at you just as the light turned green. 

Now your red spotlight was being replaced by spotty harsh yellows and whites as you drove through the sleepy streets of your college town. It was still yours despite the erratic flickering, but it felt more like an interrogation light they way it would suddenly flash on and off.

“I mean it’s like you said, he disrespected me and our relationship…” Maybe this would be enough for him?

“Y/N, stop being vague.”

A sigh and another awkward pregnant silence filled the space.

“He pretended he was drunk and tried to kiss me after cornering me in the bathroom.” You wouldn’t dare look at Donghyuck. Even though you didn’t cheat you still felt so dirty letting Jaehyun talk to you like that. You didn’t understand why you thought you’d be able to have a civil conversation  with the way he’s been acting lately. Some part of you kept holding out hope that things could go back to how they were in high school, but each day that went by proved that it could never be the same.

“When we get home, I want his number.” 

“Hyuck, it’s over, can we please drop it?”

You didn’t even notice that you were now parked in the garage under his apartment. 

“No, I already told you I’m tired of him disrespecting you.” You could tell he was trying his best not to raise his voice. “I’m tired of him acting like a child just because he’s upset at something he did. You didn’t break things off, he did, so he can’t be upset at you for moving on.”  

“I know…I just-”

“You just what? You just don’t want to hurt his feelings? Because he’s, oh let me guess: your best friend?” You opened your mouth, but Donghyuck’s voice was filling the suffocating space instead of your own. “ He’s not your best friend anymore Y/N, if anything he's more like a frenemy. He only cares about you when it benefits him. Wake up!”

You felt like you were being choked by the truth. You knew he was right, but your stupid pride didn’t want to admit that. Jaehyun cared about you, he was just being weird. Granted he had been weird since you started fucking, but that was the besides the point. He had to still care about you deep down, a friendship like yours can’t just fall apart like that. Can it? 

“Look I’m not gonna keep lecturing you, but I’m also not gonna take shit like this lightly. You and Jaehyun need to have a conversation about this shit, because the next time it happens, I will beat his ass.” Donghyuck slammed the door leaving you alone in the car. Alone with your thoughts and your phone. 

Ring

Ring

Ring

“Hello?”

“Jae…”

“Hmm?”

“We need to talk.”

—————————————————————————

“So Y/N is spending the break with her boyfriend?” 

Jaehyun didn’t want to hear about you anymore. Your talk didn’t go bad per say, but his guilty conscience wouldn’t get any better the more you were talked about. The talk was filled with tears and apologies, and ultimately Jaehyun agreed to give you some space. After some much needed reflecting he realized that Johnny and Mark were ultimately right, which he hated to admit, but deep down he always knew they were.

“Yeah, they really hit it off, she told me she's visiting next month though.” Jaehyun answered, pushing around the large shell noodles on his plate, as if something new would appear underneath the creamy sauce the plate was drenched in. 

“Oh good, I’ll give her mom a ring and see if we could have a nice dinner all together? I’d love to meet this boy, he sounds lovely based on what Y/MN (your mother’s name)  has told me!” He loved that his mother was excited for you, it was only natural. She considered you like the daughter she never had, and you considered her like your second mother. 

“Sounds like a plan.” 

“Honey, you’ve been off since you got home, what’s wrong?” Curse mother’s intuition. 

“I just messed up. Me and Y/N had a falling out, but it was my fault.” The fork made an ugly screech across the plate. “Mom…I think I’m in love with her.”

The gasp of shock he was expecting never came so Jaehyun was finally forced to meet gazes with his mom.

“Oh sweetie…I know. I’ve known for a long time.” He didn’t know why he expected her not to. Moms always know when somethings up. “Jae, your lack of dating through college was enough evidence. Also I was young once too, playing footsies under the table and then going on a “walk” is not the most amazing cover up.” 

Jaehyun groaned, wishing he could disappear, but he should’ve known his mother was more perceptive than he gave her credit for. “Please try to forget about that, but yeah we had a fling, kind of, it's complicated.” 

“Do you want to talk about it?” Jaehyun only nodded in response. “I’ll bring out some dessert and tea.” 

True to her word Jaehyun was now sitting with a large piece of cake and a steaming cup of tea, while recounting some of his very shameful behavior to his mother. 

“And now we’re not really talking much. I check on her here and there, but we don’t call like we used to. We haven’t hung out one on one in months truthfully.” Jaehyun was treating his cake almost like his half eaten pasta at the moment, smushing it around like a child who didn’t want to eat their veggies.

“I don’t blame her for not talking to you honestly.” His mother sighed, taking a small sip from her tea. “You do have a good one though, you’re lucky she hasn’t cut you off.” 

“I know… I just don’t know what to do though. Like I'm just supposed to let her slip from my fingers and be fine with it?”

Mrs. Jeong clicked her tongue and gave her son a knowing look. “I mean yeah. You had your chance to make her yours and I think she gave you more than enough time to get your head out of your ass.” Jaehyun could only nod as he waited for the next onslaught of lectures. “Look baby, you’re just gonna have to be happy for her. It sucks and it’s probably never not going to suck, but if you care for her you’ll wait for her.” 

“But what if they like, last longer and he proposes or something?” 

Another knowing look and a sad smile.

“Then you’re just gonna have to accept it. She went and found something that makes her feel wanted, you can’t blame her for wanting that forever.” 

No mother wanted this for their son, but she also wasn’t going to lie to him. Jaehyun knew that, he always did, but some part of him wanted to be babied and told it would be ok, even if it wasn’t.

—————————————————————————

Finally you were venturing home to visit as well as introduce Donghyuck to your family. You weren’t terribly nervous, but you could tell that Donghyuck was. He had spent all week picking out the perfect clothes to wear in front of your family, as well bought gifts for your mother and father. You kept reassuring him that it wasn’t necessary, but he just couldn’t fathom walking into your house empty handed. 

“Donghyuck, the gifts you got are enough, you don’t need to buy flowers and a cake.” 

“I can’t show up empty handed to a potluck! Also the flowers are a housewarming gift.” He had his hands pressed against the glass of the cake display, looking at all the various options he could choose from. 

“Baby, they’ve lived in that house for twenty years, so you’re about two decades late for housewarming. “

“Should we get ganache or buttercream? Actually don’t answer that, I'm getting both.” 

You rolled your eyes, but relented in your efforts to stop him. Donghyuck clearly had his mind made up on how to impress your parents, and you weren’t going to burst his bubble. Your parents already liked him from how highly you spoke of him, but if this would ease his mind you weren’t going to ruin his fun.

“Y/N, welcome home darling! Oh, and you must be Donghyuck, I’ve heard so much about you!” Your mother welcomed both of you with kisses on your cheeks and tight hugs. 

“It’s nice to meet you Mrs. Y/LN (your last name).” Donghyuck ever the charmer handed the large bouquet to your mother as well as a small box. She opened it and gasped at the pearl earrings held inside. “I hope they’re to your liking, I can always exchange them for something different-“

“Oh sweetheart they’re wonderful, please don’t fret. Come on, let’s go join everyone else.” 

Your mother led you and Donghyuck out to the backyard where the whole neighborhood seemed to be in attendance. You made your rounds, saying hi to all the attendees and introducing Donghyuck whose nerves seemed to melt the more he talked. After what felt like an hour of talking (more like 20 minutes), you finally got an opportunity to talk to your father. He seemed more than pleased with Donghyuck and the watch that he was gifted by him. 

“This one’s a keeper, Y/n, don’t fumble.” Your fathers attempt at whispering was pretty poor so you rolled your eyes in response before shooting an apologetic look at your boyfriend. Donghyuck found it amusing though. It was a relief to know all your family liked him so far. Your neighbors seemed charmed as well which was doing wonders for not only his nerves but his ego as well.

“So how did you two meet?” Your father took a swig of his beer while flipping over one of the hamburger patties on the grill. He was definitely one of the best multitaskers you knew, especially when there was alcohol or grilling involved.

“At a party, he wined and dined me at a Denny's afterwards.” You smiled at Donghyuck, leaning against his arm. You could feel a pair of eyes on you as you talked to your father, but chose to ignore it. 

“I promise we went on better dates afterwards.” Your father seemed amused at your boyfriend's hurried tone. It was cute Donghyuck felt like he had something else to prove. You knew he had already won your parents over, especially since you gushed so much about him over the phone to your mother; but he was in the right to feel a bit nervous still. “We’re actually going on a skiing trip for winter break, some of my extended family owns the lodge we’re staying at.” That was new to you. You looked up at him in disbelief and Donghyuck simply winked at you, his little way of saying “surprise”. 

“Is your family rich?” Your dad sure was subtle. 

“We come from a bit of old money, but I do work myself. I’m slated to take over the IT division of my uncle’s company after I graduate.” Your dad seemed very intrigued and so were you. Donghyuck wasn’t usually one to brag which is probably why this was the first time you were hearing any of this. You knew Donghyuck was a hard worker and he didn’t like talking handouts, even his tuition was covered by a scholarship and not his mom. You weren’t sure how much his mom made, but he had told you she was an entrepreneur and she made enough to cover his school, but he refused. His hardworking attitude was one of the things you loved about Donghyuck. Even though he found school relatively easy, he refused to do a stream or even relax until all his work was done for the week. It led to a lot of all-nighters, to the point where he would finally join you in bed when you were about to get up for the day, but it left more time for the two of you to be together at the end of the week. 

“You sound like you have a bright future ahead of you son, good for you.” You could see Donghyuck practically preen at the praise, which made you giggle a little. “Now then make sure you keep this one in line, also a ring on that finger in six months would be great!” You were seriously gonna punch your dad later.

“If she’ll have me, I’ll make it happen” You gawked at Donghyuck. You didn’t understand how he could so casually talk about marriage when the two of you had only been together for a few months. Sure you’d been to a few of Jaehyun’s friends' weddings, he was about to graduate after all so it was normal for people his age to get married. You, however, felt way too young to even be flirting with the thought of marriage. 

“Ok that’s enough you two, I don’t need you giving him any more ideas.” You pulled Donghyuck away to go make small talk with the few neighbors you hadn’t greeted yet. One of them was unfortunately Jaehyun, but it felt wrong to not at least say “hi.” 

Donghyuck was in fine spirits, but the moment he realized where you were pulling him, his happy demeanor frosted over into a glare. Jaehyun had no idea the two of you were even venturing over, but you wanted to keep it that way. Hopefully Donghyuck would be civil, once you approached him, but you knew that glare would throw everything off immediately. You nudge your boyfriend to fix his face before tapping on Jaehyun’s shoulder. Jaehyun turned around slightly confused, but replaced his shock with a tight lip smile. You glanced at Donghyuck just to make sure he wasn’t still glaring, and thankfully he wasn’t but he wasn’t wearing the most pleasant expression either.

“Hey, how’s it going?” Jaehyun asked awkwardly.

Before you could answer, Donghyuck placed a protective arm around your waist, pulling you closer to his side. You shot a small glare at him, because you understood he had his qualms about Jaehyun, but you hoped he could at least be civil for five minutes. 

“It’s going well, just making my rounds with Hyuck. What about you? How’s your summer going?” You did your best to pretend like your boyfriend and your ex friend with benefits, weren’t currently having a silent battle, but it was proving to be quite difficult. You don’t know why you have a thing for strong personalities, but clearly it’s biting you in the ass currently.

“It’s going fine. How’s your summer? Enjoying your honeymoon?”

Oh fuck.

“It’s going great, our summer and our “honeymoon.”” Donghyuck bit back at Jaehyun, moving his hand down lower so it was resting practically on your ass. You didn’t miss the way Jaehyun’s eyes followed his hand.

You had to admit it was kinda hot seeing Donghyuck annoyed and the possessiveness was also a bit of a turn on. However, you weren’t gonna continue to let the two have a petty war over nothing. You and Jaehyun talked and agreed to be civil and hopefully rekindle your friendship, but you knew Donghyuck wasn’t entirely happy about that. So you could understand why Donghyuck was acting this way, but Jaehyun was being a bit ridiculous, in your opinion.

“Guys, can we not?” 

“Can we not, what? We’re just having a nice conversation.” You threw Donghyuck a scandalized look. You understand why he was pissed at Jaehyun, but you weren’t gonna let him take that tone with you. 

“Jae, we’ll be back.” You wave the older goodbye before dragging Donghyuck inside and upstairs. You found the nearest bedroom, not caring if it was the guest room before locking it. “You’ve lost your fucking mind.” You didn’t mean to snap at him but you were so frustrated with all the petty bullshit.

“You can’t be serious right now.” Donghyuck huffed out. “I’m out of my fucking mind? Did you not just hear him disrespecting us once again?” Donghyuck had a point but you just wished for once he would be the bigger person instead of letting Jaehyun under his skin immediately. “Why do I always have to yield to his douchery?” 

“Donghyuck, it’s just easier if you don’t give him a reaction. He’s bitter and hurt, he’s working through it.” 

Your boyfriend pokes his tongue on the inside of his cheek, chuckling ruefully at you. “He’s bitter and hurt? Well he wouldn’t be if he actually treated you like you were worth something! It’s not my fault that I actually give you what you were looking for! I shouldn’t have to be his fucking punching bag!” 

“If anyone is his punching bag it’s fucking me!” 

You were both screaming and you were sure anyone close enough to the window could hear you two. Clearly this was something that needed to be addressed, again. 

“You’re not the one who’s been harassed and made to feel like shit by their own best friend, for months, just because I found something better.” Here came the tears of course. You hated crying during these conversations but everything just seemed to come out no matter how hard you tried to hold back. “I’ve been trying to fix shit, on both ends. And I know you don’t see it but he’s been trying.” Donghyuck looked skeptically at you, but he knew you weren’t done so he didn’t comment. “He wants to be able to be in a room with us and not feel like absolute shit, but it’s just kinda hard for him.” You sighed, because you knew what you were about to tell Donghyuck wasn’t a surprise, but he hated hearing it. “He came to the conclusion that he is in love with me and has been for a while, but didn’t want to admit it. I know he fucked up and lost his chance, he knows that too, but watching someone you love be happy with someone that isn’t you is hard.” You shot a pointed look. “Even you have to admit that.”

Donghyuck sighed. He did know that was hard. He watched it happen in high school to one of his friends. Which is probably why this whole thing made him so angry, it just felt like a repeat but instead of being a bystander, he was in the middle. 

“Ok yeah, you’re right. I’ll give him some grace.” You felt sort of relieved that Donghyuck was willing to yield at least this once, but you weren’t going to take his kindness for granted. If Jaehyun ever truly stepped out of line as bad as he did at the frat you would end your friendship entirely. That was something you promised to Donghyuck that same night. Aside from that though, Jaehyun said he was going to do his best to be a good sport, and while he was off to a bad start, you hoped he would at least apologize later. 

Donghyuck engulfed you into a nice bear hug that you couldn’t help but smile and giggle at. He gave the best hugs and always seemed to know when you needed one. “We’re ok, I’m sorry for being rude out there, especially towards you.” 

“It’s ok. I’m sorry I snapped at you that was uncalled for.” 

“It’s ok, I know you just want me and bighead to get along.” Lord, he's been spending way too much time with Minjeong lately. 

“Alright Minjeong Jr., let’s get back out there.”

Just as you opened the door you came face to chest with Jaehyun who had his fist raised up. He must’ve been about to knock, but as always your weird friend-sense seemed to beat him to it.

“Hey, I just came to apologize.” 

“It's all cool man, I’m sorry too.” You were a little surprised Donghyuck apologized, but honestly it made you happy that there was a possibility the two of them could get along. “Also, I don’t know if this is too much to ask, but would you maybe want to game sometime?”  That surprised you even more.

“Like all of us, or just you and me?” Jaehyun seemed surprised too, but clearly wasn’t entirely opposed.

“Just you and I. She refuses to play Overwatch and we need another player for our team. Who do you main?” 

“Cassidy” Jaehyun finally cracked a small smile on what felt like ages. 

“Nice, we’ve been needing another DPS on our team, you down to join?” Donghyuck asked cooley, bringing his hand up to dap up the other man. 

“Yeah, just shoot me a message whenever.” Jaehyun pulled out his phone, swiping through until he found discord. 

“Real, we’re going home in a few days, so maybe we can play then if you’re back too.” 

You felt like a third wheel at this point. You knew if the two ever found a middle ground it would definitely be gaming. 

“Sure, I should be back like a day after yall I think.

“Sounds great.”

—————————————————————————

Donghyuck and Jaehyun had been texting for almost an hour now and you were starting to feel like it was a bad idea that they exchanged contact info. Not because they were fighting, but because they were getting along a little too well. 

Donghyuck had been giggling at his phone like a schoolgirl the whole time, while you just laid next to him scrolling on your own phone. “I can’t believe we were beefing before. You did this on purpose.” 

You gawked at your boyfriend, scandalized that he would even accuse you of that. “Hyuck I did not! You think I would make up that shit about him harassing me at the frat party?” 

A skeptical look.

“Unbelievable.” You flopped backwards onto the bed. “My boyfriend is gonna leave me for my old situationship slash best friend.” You threw your hand over your face dramatically. Trying to gain some sort of leverage over Donghyuck.

“You’re right, I am.” Donghyuck supplied, still typing away at his phone. 

Scoffing, you tried to peek at what the two were talking about. “What is he even saying to have you this enraptured? I’m literally laid out all nice for you and you’re not even interested.” You weren’t really wearing anything special, but you were wearing one of Donghyuck’s oversized shirts and some nice panties, which usually would’ve caught his attention by now. 

“Babe that’s nasty, your parents are literally down the hall. Also we’re talking about genshin, since you refuse to play that too.” He did have a point about your parents, but you could be quiet… sometimes. “Besides we have all summer for that, I do still enjoy seeing you in my shirts if that’s what you’re worried about though.” He placed a small kiss on your temple, trying his best to reassure you.

“I’m not worried about that. I’m worried about you and big head talking about my deepest darkest secrets.” You knew Donghyuck was better than that, but sometimes Jaehyun wasn’t. You learned from Mark that sometimes Jaehyun didn’t know when to shut his mouth about you and sex. It wasn’t entirely embarrassing since sex was normal, but you also didn’t like your business to be aired out like that. 

“Don’t worry, we’ll only make fun of you when you’re around to defend yourself.” Donghyuk was suddenly above you, a teasing smirk playing at his lips. “Besides, I’m too possessive. Only I get to talk about you like that, and I'll keep it that way.” You were starting to regret not booking a hotel like Donghyuck initially suggested. He was practically purring as he spoke and the words were going straight to your core.

“Are you sure we can’t mess around a little… I’ll be quiet.” 

The laughter that spilled out of Donghyuck was infectious, you knew it was a ridiculous request but no one could blame you trying. 

“You’re unbelievable, It’s only two more days. Think about how good the sex will be.

“It could be good now.” You pouted up at him through your lashes.

“Well I'd like to be invited back in the future, so you’re just gonna have to wait.” He kissed your pout away just as quick as it appeared, smiling down at you softly when he pulled back. 

You loved moments like this, moments where it just felt like you and Donghyuck. Moments where you’d lightly trace your fingers over his moles, connecting them like constellations. 

“Fine, I’ll wait, but don’t expect me to lift a single finger.” 

Donghyuck simply rolled his eyes before rolling back over next to you. “Wouldn’t dream of it.” He yawned, pulling you closer to his frame.

—————————————————————————

The fall semester was finally here and it was a shit show. You started your nursing internship at one of the local hospitals and instead of challenging classes taking up the majority of your time, it was now strenuous shifts there. You weren’t working 80 hours like most nurses, but the majority of your days were spent at the hospital. And when you weren’t working you were sleeping. You were honestly glad Donghyuck and Jaehyun were gaming buddies now, because you didn’t have the energy to or time to pay as much attention to Donghyuck as you wished. He was being a good sport through it all, but you could tell your lack of intimacy and time together was starting to take a toll on him.

Now it was 2am and you were punching in the six digit code to Donghyuck’s apartment. Even though you still had a dorm with Minjeong you felt some part of Donghyuck was fulfilled when he woke up next to you. So here you were after your 10 minute walk in the cool, early morning, August air. Your scrubs felt and probably smelled dank against your body and you were so thankful that this weekend would probably be spent in Donghyuck oversized shirts and your own shorts while you caught up on sleep and time together. 

Upon entering the house you made a beeline for the shower, wanting to wash all the sterile hospital smell off of you. You were in the infant ward today so most of your day was spent cooing at babies as well as checking their vitals. You changed a few diapers, helped a few mothers, all in all it wasn’t as intense as some other days this week. It was honestly a nice break. It still didn’t change the fact that you were exhausted though. The hot water was working wonders on your aching body, but you honestly didn’t know how much longer you could stand. Deciding on just a body shower you quickly lathered and rinsed yourself before turning off the steaming shower head. You blindly reached your hand out for your towel. All you could feel was the slightly dewy metal of the towel rack before you finally made contact with the fluffy cloth and something else. Something that felt warm and familiar.

“What are you doing up?” You questioned who you hoped was your boyfriend and not some stranger who followed you home amidst your post shift delirium. You were patting your face dry, so you couldn’t really see Donghyuck behind the towel or

the steam that covered the glass of the shower door.

“I was gaming. I wanted to make sure you got here safely.” You could hear the fatigue in his voice. Donghyuck rarely stayed up late, which was surprising since most gamers tended to have a horrible sleeping schedule. Donghyuck was the exception though, opting to wake up in the morning hours to get his homework and other errands out of the way and saving his nights for streams that ran no later than 11:00pm. When you had a normal sleeping schedule, this worked very well for both of you, but now it made you upset that he felt the need to derail his own sleep just for you.

“Thank you for waiting up, it means a lot. Don’t make a habit of it though, I want you to sleep. You shouldn’t stay up just for me.” You stepped out of the shower, the towel now wrapped around your frame. The steam cleared and there was Donghyuck in his overtired glory. Eyelids so droopy you were worried he would fall asleep standing up. “Did you at least take a nap?” You crossed the bathroom until you were standing in front of him, cupping his face before planting a sweet kiss on his lips.

Donghyuck shook his head. “I woke up late today.” 

You wanted to counter that statement since Donghyuck never slept past 10am, but decided to leave it alone. You were grateful he waited for you. It was nice knowing you would fall asleep in his arms and not just impossibly close to his frame for comfort. 

“You can go, I’ll be there in a few minutes.” 

Another shake. 

You knew there was no point in pushing it so you got dressed and finished up the rest of your night time routine as quickly as possible. When you and Donghyuck finally fell into the sheets together, it was a little past 2:30. You were a mess of tangled limbs and tacky skin as you tried to find a comfortable position to cuddle in and once you did both you and Donghyuck released a contented sigh. 

“This internship sucks.” Donghyuck sighed, placing a chaste kiss on the back of your neck.

“I know, but it’s only one semester. I’ll be all yours for graduation.” You did your best to speak through a yawn that Donghyuck caught after you.

“It’s not enough, it should be illegal for you to be at the hospital that long.” 

“Well I’m also sleeping for a lot of that time.” You tried to reason.

“Shhh, blame the hospital, not your body’s needs.” Donghyuck’s words were starting to slur, a true testament to how tired he actually was. The fact that he had managed to stay up this late was impressive enough, but you knew in seconds if not minutes you’d be hearing soft snores. “You’re off this weekend right?” You couldn’t help but chuckle a little. He’s asked that at least three times this week, it was cute, almost like he was in disbelief that he’d actually get to spend time with you. “It’s not funny. I only get to see you when you’re sleeping, it’s kinda creepy.” 

“Ew, you watch me when I sleep?” 

“You’re lucky I just watched, the amount of times I wanted to draw a mustache on you is a bit concerning.” Donghyuck yawned again, snuggling closer to your back.

“You’re terrible.” Was all you could muster as you finally let sleep win, drifting off into a much needed slumber.

—————————————————————————

“Dude, we’re being eaten alive over here, where are you?” Donghyuck whisper-shouted into his headset. You were still sleeping so he was trying his best to control his volume, but his team was getting beat so bad that he wanted to scream. 

“There’s a fucking sniper on my ass, everytime I step out they shoot at me.” Jaehyun yelled into his headset, groaning as another attempt at aiding his team was thwarted by the widowmaker that had him in their sights.

“Fuck they got Jeno again.” Jisung cursed.

“Jae just throw a flashbang at the building, it’ll at least stun them.” Donghyuck seethed into the mic. He looked back at the bed to make sure you were still soundly asleep and in that one moment. he was gunned down with his fellow teammates. “Fuck!” Donghyuck quickly covered his mouth, beating himself up when he heard you stir in bed. He didn’t mean to yell, but unfortunately at the end of the day he was a gamer, a very passionate gamer.

“What time is it?” You groaned quietly, craning your head slightly to get a better view of your boyfriend. 

“It’s a little past noon, I’m sorry baby, I didn’t mean to yell.” Donghyuck could hear the guys making fun of him through his headset, but chose to ignore it.

“S’okay. You playing with the guys?” You stretched in bed, arching your back in an attempt to wake up.

“Yeah, you wanna say hi?” 

You made an affirmative sound before pulling the gaming chair from the desk Donghyuck bought for you. The desk was for school, but he argued that a gaming chair was more comfortable than a regular rolling chair. 

You grabbed the second headset Donghyuck also bought for you, so you could talk to the guys while he gamed. “Good morning…” You yawned into the mic, leaning your head back on the headrest of the chair.

“Hi Y/N!” A chorus of deep voices chirped back.

“How’s the internship going?” Jeno piped up, healing Donghyuck in the process.

“It’s going fine, I like it a lot. I’m just tired… all the time. Next week I go on day shift though, so I’ll have a decent sleeping schedule.” You could see the way Donghyuck was grinning at that information. It had been a long time since the two of you had a normal sleeping schedule and even if this was only for a few weeks, he would be happy with what he could get.

“Any hot doctors, or are you still into mr. loser?” Jaehyun jabbed. In the past that would probably be something that you and Donghyuck wouldn’t laugh at. As of now though all the bad blood was gone and you could comfortably joke like you used to with Jaehyun. It made you happy that he and Donghyuck could get along and that you and Jaehyun were slowly patching up your own relationship.

“No, I still love mr. loser, that might change in a few wee— Babe on your left!” 

“Fuck yeah!” With your help he was able to gun down one of the enemies and get the kill count almost even. “What the fuck how did you even see them?” Donghyuck didn’t understand why you didn’t want to play Overwatch when you had such good eye coordination. Even if you couldn’t play fps  games,you could at least heal or provide support. 

“I don’t know, I thought they were pretty obvious.” You shrugged, stealing a sip from the coffee next to his keyboard. “Did you get me any?” Donghyuck nodded, motioning to the bedside table. You planted a quick peck on his cheek before retrieving the caffeinated beverage and your phone. “Did you eat yet?” 

“No, there’s no food though…” Donghyuck replied sheepishly. Unfortunately when your sleep schedule was shitty, so was his. The usual time your boyfriend would go get groceries was now nap time while the rest was focused on school or streaming.

“I’ll order something, don’t worry.”

—————————————————————————

Another end of semester frat party is where you found yourself tonight. Your internship had ended a few days ago and after some much needed rest you were ready to kick back with Donghyuck and your friends. Currently you and Donghyuck were in a heated game of beer pong against Minjeong and Ten. At this point both teams had three cups left, it could be anyone’s game— you were determined to make it yours. 

“Go to the left a little- too far… there you go.” Donghyuck had been your coach all game and you two probably looked sickening. He was standing directly behind you, one hand on your waist, the other on your throwing arm. Ten and Minjeong claimed you were cheating, but you begged to differ since you were the one actually throwing. “Go ahead, baby.”

Cautiously you moved your arm back and forth to get the right angle, once you were satisfied you let the ball go. The ball bounced once before sinking nicely into the cup full of beer across the table. Ten and Minjeong exchanged equally unimpressed looks before rock, paper, scissoring over who would have to chug the beer. Ten lost for what was now the third time in a row and begrudgingly downed the drink. 

It was now Donghyuck’s turn and with ease he managed to land the ball in the second to last cup. Ten and Minjeong looked scared now. There was one cup left and while it could still be anyone’s game— Donghyuck had the ball. 

“Can she just chug this and end it?” Ten asked, wanting to spare himself the humiliation of possibly throwing up. 

“Nope.” With that simple deceleration the ball was

sunk in the cup. 

—————————————————————————

After cup pong you and Donghyuck took to the dance floor before he decided he wanted to do karaoke. He was singing an amazing rendition of “Party Rock Anthem” by LMFAO. While you enjoyed watching him, the stuffy atmosphere of the frat was starting to make you feel a bit light headed. 

“I’m gonna step outside for a bit!” You shouted at Jeno before making your way towards the back door. Sliding the glass door open made you release a sigh of relief when you felt the chill of winter air against your skin. Thankfully a cropped puffer was a part of your less than winter appropriate party outfit, so you at least had something to keep you warm. 

When the chill started to become a problem you moved to sit by the fire. Warming up your fingers and legs as you appreciated the quiet crackling as opposed to loud bass you could still hear thudding on the house. You sat there for a moment with your thoughts and the fire as your only company before you heard the back door slide open. You didn’t bother craning your neck, figuring it was some random party goer searching for the same solace you were just a few minutes ago. 

“I didn’t think I’d find you out here.” Jaehyun sat in the chair next to you, beer slung loosely in his hand. He tipped the bottle towards, but you declined. You had way too much during your beer pong game and you were just now starting to sober up. “Surprised you aren’t watching your boyfriend’s performance. He’s doing a pretty good rendition of “Billie Jean.”” 

“I was, but I needed some air, we pregammed here so I’ve been in the house for a while.”

 Jaehyun hummed, taking a swig of his beer before returning his gaze to the fire. “So next semester will be your one year, right?”

“Yeah, mid april, kinda hard to believe.” The conversation was awkward. Jaehyun was definitely holding something back, but as always he seemed too stubborn to admit it. “Is there something on your mind, you’re being weird.”

“You’re too intuitive, sometimes.” He chuckled, had still fixed on the fire as if looking at you would turn him to stone. “I don’t know how to say this without making you upset.” 

That confused you. The two of you haven’t fought and neither has he or Donghyuck lately, so this was odd. 

“What do you mean— why would I get upset?”

“I think I’m still in love with you.” 

Your breath halted for a moment. Now it was your turn to stare into the fire. You don’t know what you were expecting, but it surely wasn’t this. In the Eight months that you two had cut things off

you were very confident in the fact that you had no romantic feelings for Jaehyun whatsoever. This didn’t necessarily throw a curveball at you, honestly it made you kinda angr— oh, that’s what he meant.

“Jae… this isn’t- we’re not doing this again.” How could you say this without blowing up? “If you said this to me 7 months ago, I probably would’ve dropped everything and ran back to you.” You sighed deeply, blinking back tears you didn’t even realize were forming. “I’m happy now… I really love Donghyuck. I love you too, but not in that way anymore.” You were crying now, but you didn’t know why. In a way this was the closure you always wanted, but not what you expected him to say.

“I don’t want you to drop everything… I just…” He took a deep sigh. “I wanted to tell you, so that I can get over you.” 

“You want me to reject you?” You looked at him dumbfounded.

“More or Less, yeah.” 

You sniffled as you tried your best to compose yourself. “This is not how I wanted to get my closure, but whatever.” Chuckling a bit you took a deep breath, “Jae, I don’t love you as more than a friend. I’m happy with Donghyuck, and I can genuinely see us lasting for a long time.” You felt so stupid saying that, but you also felt somewhat relieved hearing it out loud. “Was that good enough?”

“That was perfect.” 

Taglist: @snapcracklen, @peachesmilk, @clblnz, @ahgazen, @dulyrana

[bbsmuts]

Monday of Appreciation #1: July 22, 2024

Welcome to my version of Smite's Monday of Appreciation, wherein I'll name a few of the users who I have appreciated since I got on here, so about 2 and a half years. I'll probably do one of these every few months.

#1: @ggidolsmuts

Ah, Ddeun. One of Tumblr's more underrated users, in my opinion. First-class writing and support for me in the earlier (and current) days of my career. I'll never forget the first of yours I read, which was your Fromis App work on Yiren. In fact, reading this and some of your others were what lead me to write for Tumblr in the first place, which is why you place at #1. I wouldn't even be here if it weren't for you.

#2: @xiaoondc

I think it was your Momo ask that really got me noticed, since after that I went from about 50 followers to about 500 in a month. Field Trip was REALLY what got me noticed, which brought me more spotlight. Really, I'd be nowhere without your initial noticing of me. You've been a loyal supporter and advisor who's pitched several good smuts, a few of which are coming soon. And by soon, I mean in 2050. So you are a second crucial role in how I got to where I am. I also appreciate that I can go to you for assistance, advice, or just for moral support at any time.

#3: @aurorororaaa

You were my first follower. Maybe you thought I'd forget you, but I didn't. Thank you.

#4: @jazi1234

You were the first to give a like on my first ever post. Thank you.

#5: @fukurofanfics

You've been a fantastic friend my entire life, as well as being a loyal supporter of my account. Couldn't appreciate you more, man.

#6: @co-reborn

Wrote two of the best Yiren smuts I've ever read, as well as several other fantastic ones.

#7: @idolsgeneration

Somehow finds time to post pictures of my favorite idols like every 10 minutes, and a couple of those posts inspired smuts, either ones I've posted or ones in progress. And some for a long time in the future.

#8: @fillinforlater

Another one of the first writers I discovered on Tumblr, and the one responsible for many a fantastic fic. Also the one who inspired this post.

#9: @sinswithpleasure

Bucket List 5, an incredible Nayeon smut and one of the first I read after some of Ddeun's. Also someone who inspired me to start writing my ideas myself.

#10: @banananutsmuthie

Idol Club was just amazing, and the lore that came with it. Also someone who inspired me to write.

#11: @smuttysabina / @dailysabinasmuts

Phenomenal short fics every day of the week, as well as several longer works which are just as good. I really like your work on Everglow, we need more.

#12: @capslocked

Insanely long fics (it's like 30k works a smut, I swear 💀), but insanely good fics. Yet another who inspired me to write.

#13: @lustspren

Supreme writing, which has inspired the sentence structure and usage of words in some of my work. Was also the author of the first smut I gave a like to, for what that's worth.

#13: @byunrosehajoon

You're my fiancée and soon-to-be wife in about 12 hours. Love you babe.

______________________________________________________________

If anyone feels like they should have been on here, give me a shout and you might be on the next one.

All the best -상훈

[foone]

Pepe Sylvia scene where someone is ranting in front of a corkboard covered in pictures and string but it's about chastity meme culture. (slightly NSFW text and long ranting under the cut)

"first it's Locktober and sure, makes sense, why not, but then you get to November and you think you're home free, but wait, it's actually NO-vember, as in 'no you're not getting let out' and then it's December and you think you've won, cause how do you make December about chastity? But you forget, December is the time of Christmas: things wrapped up, with a bow, 'do not open til Christmas!'. That's how they get you. But then you think, maybe, just maybe, that means Christmas day is the day, you'll finally be out... NOPE! Welcome to NO-el, it's a gift-giving holiday, bud! And you're in a relationship with a person who's got you locked up in chastity, take a wild guess what they're getting you... That's right, a new cage! So you gotta try it on, of course, and now you're so close to the end of the year, so maybe you can just make it a few days? Then bam, January, next year... Just in time for new years resolutions! Guess what those are gonna be? Well, I'll tell you what they're not gonna be, you shooting any fucking goo! February: the month of valentines day. And what could be more romantic? March: that's when St. Patrick's day is, and you will not be having the luck of the Irish in your attempt to get unlocked... April: oh sure, you're getting unlocked at the start of April... ON APRIL FOOLS DAY? you thought! It's a trick, of course. May: MAY-be you'll be getting out... But I doubt it! June... More like Ju-NO! JULY, the month of love... But the big ju-LIE is that you'll be getting any loving this month. August! It starts on National Girlfriend Day... Well why can't you just wait another month for your girlfriend? Even if you have a boyfriend or enby friend, they'll find a way. I learned that the hard way-" they take a deep drag of their cigarette-" where was I? September! Well, September 1st is Emma Nutt day, so you think this might be a good sign, maybe you'll finally get to nutt.. Especially because it's sexual health month... But no! This is when don't-break-the-streakitis really hits you! It's almost been a year since you started this journey, so if you make it through this month, you'll have done it for a year... Won't that be a great accomplishment? And they promise to give you a big reward on the one year anniversary..."

"BUT NO!" They smack the board with the back of their hand, and several of the pictures fall off, pushpins going everywhere. (On closer inspection, some of the photos seem to have been pixelated before they were printed out)

"You're right back in Locktober! They can't let you out in Locktober! That's just silly. So you'll have to wait a little while, and see what the answer is in NO-vember. It never ends!"

They turn back to their corkboard. "it never ends", they say again, softly, as they lean their head against it, and start to sob.

[ohbo-ohno]

Hi!!! This is my first ever ask so sorry if it’s weird lol. Out of all the 141 boys, who’d you think would be most likely to sneak lactation pills into readers food in hopes of reader coming to them for help??? I can’t stop thinking about it and I need to know your thoughts too

no worries at all!!!!! i did not realize lactation pills were a thing though omg this is wild to me

here's my ranking from most to least likely: price, ghost, soap, gaz

i'll be honest, i only put soap below ghost because when i did some googling the Internet said lactation inducing medicine can take several months to work and soap does not have the patience for that lmfao

anyways price is the most likely culprit for this (imo) because that man is the walking definition of a Breeding Kink. he wants you knocked up and pregnant the moment he decides he even wants you. it's his first fucking priority. he'll start slipping you lactation supplements concerningly early in your relationship (because of the aforementioned several months) and masks the way he feels you up in the shower as horniness instead of medical curiosity lmao

also i personally don't see the appeal in drinking breast milk but John Price sure does. that man is drinking you dry, and tbh it's lowkey better if you don't actually have a baby to feed because he gets to keep all your milk for himself

ghost would do this and like 10 other things to keep you as reliant on him as possible. he just wants you to come to him for everything, and he's far from above manufacturing a reason for you to need him. and with breast milk drinking, it's just another way for him to consume you, another part of you he can literally drink down. of course he's into it. that man starts salivating the first time you complain about your tits being sore

(also ghost is totally a dominant freak but tbh there are certain versions of that man that i think have a very deeply buried mommy kink)

soap would do it just because he's a fucking freak. he sees like a singular porno with breast milk drinking and is like "I Need That Now" and starts slipping you the lactation pills. tbh he probably just gets into a routine of doing and forgets about it after a while, by the time you actually start lactating he's like "oh hell yeah" because he just completely forgot

gaz would probably suggest that you take them while you're pregnant, and he just ends up being fucking obsessed with the milk you produce. before the baby's come, it's got to go somewhere and he deems it an insult to just pump and throw it away :/ he'll lay on your chest for as long as you'll let him lmao (and maybe keep slipping the medicine to you post-baby and post-baby-being-weened)

[inevitably-johnlocked]

hey, steph! how are you, like, genuinely? not the small talk. i wanna listen

Hey Lovely 💜🖤

I want to apologize for putting this off for so long... which should be a clue as to how I am actually doing.

Honestly? Not good, but I'm trying my best. It's been... a time. Will put under a cut for those who don't want to read about the tagged items.

TL;DR – my real life is a bit chaotic, and I hide a lot from y'all because I REALLY try not to be negative here since my blog is where I come to be happy AND because I am a very private person, but I try my best to just keep going day to day as the chaos settles down slowly.

I've got some good things coming though, so I hope a week's rest next week when I'm off (and will probably take a break from here too) will reset my brain.

Work has been insane, and is most of the cause of my mental distress for the past few months. From Easter until Canada Day Weekend at my job is lovingly referred to as "Silly Season" simply because of how on-the-fly, balls-to-the-wall our workload is until summertime downtime officially begins for us. Without disclosing too much, it's basically non-stop, long hours for me until one of the 3 break weeks we get during the this long stretch happens where, incidentally because of the nature of my job and the team I work on, it actually gets BUSIER for us.

It actually ended earlier than we expected this year (yesterday) and we'll be "quieter" until the end of September now. See an opportunity, I actually took next week off between the two long weekends because my mental health has taken a severe hit and I'm having trouble just... enjoying things? I'm haven't gamed or drew in a few weeks, and blogging and writing feels like a chore. I literally just come home, file this blog, reply to one or two asks, and then go to bed, and do it all over again the next day. Day in and day out, for 3 months. On weekends I have to force myself out of my apartment because I KNOW I will sink lower if I don't leave.

On top of that, my brain has convinced me that literally everyone hates me: friends, coworkers, family, you guys, my damned plants. I just feel very alone these days and... I'll be real here, I've almost abandoned this blog a few times in the past few months. I feel like I make fic lists that no one reblogs or likes and tell me they're all shit. I post my art and I barely break 20 notes. I write something and I get maybe 2 likes. I can't really answer any thoughtful asks because my mental state's been in the shitter for months. I desperately want to reply to the few sexuality asks I have and I physically can't. Being on my computer – after working ON a computer for my day job for 12 hour days everyday – feels like too much, so I try to limit my time on the blog now too.

I just try to keep carrying on, encouraged by the once-in-a-blue-moon testimonial ask I get thanking me for still being here. I thank YOU guys for reminding me that people still like coming here.

Stressed about money and food and rent just like everyone else, and just getting frustrated at other things.

And finally, my uncle (my dad's brother and my godfather) hasn't been doing well health-wise, and he's being moved to assisted living next week. His health has been declining since Easter, so it's been a bit of worrying time for relatives.

Having my therapist helps a lot. She talks me through a lot of my complicated feelings, my sense of self and ways to cope with my anxiety and stress. I'm talking to her again next week, so no worries, gang. As I said, I just keep on keeping on.

Some positivity though:

I booked next week off to try to just... recenter myself. To forget about everything and TRY to get back to doing the things I love. I will probably take a break from this blog as well during that time to limit my social-media time. It's not ideal but I need a break from my computer, I think.

I go to the gym a lot more these days, which has helped with the seething annoyance I constantly have at work. Usually feel better after it.

And because of the gym and getting out more, I've been slowly feeling better physically, better than I have since before 2019. The break from work is for the mental health, LOL.

I'm getting my hair recoloured next week. Can't afford it, really, but I just REALLY need to feel better about myself again, and I always feel so different when I colour my hair. I was doing so good for awhile. I want that again.

Anyway, I'm sorry to bombard y'all with my complicated mess of a brain. I really do appreciate you asking, so THANK YOU. I rarely get asked in real life if I am okay because I keep very private due to past people betraying my trust. And I don't like seeing people unhappy, so I feel if I tell people about my problems, then I feel I am a burden, so I just... continue existing.

Thank you for letting me be a burden just this once.

[gyusimp]

modern Gyutaro x reader (fluff) who has like A TON of money and spends it on buying him things he always wanted/surprising him with a little too much presents.

°•Gyutaro x Rich reader Headcanons•°

I wrote this on a break at work and I just realized that you actually requested a Modern AU and I didn't remember 😭 pls forgive me, if you want other headcanons in a Modern AU please let me know and I'll fix my mistake but don't hate me lol

• You were the daughter of a great businessman in Japan, there were not many wealthy people at this time so everyone who knew who your father was treated you with immense respect, worthy of royalty. Your dad is a businessman looking to expand his income in several branches, not just one, so when he had the crazy idea of opening a tea house in the Yoshiwara Entertainment District everything was a success just like his other businesses.

• You had an entrepreneurial spirit just like him, so instead of settling for the allowances you received from him, you preferred to get to work and help him in each of his new businesses no matter what it was and thus generate your own profits at his side and his new success in Yoshiwara was no exception.

• You helped manage the house and organize the girls who worked there. Everything was very normal until after a few months you found out that there was a rumor of a creature that sneaked through the walls of brothels to steal pretty girls and turn them into its food. You didn't believe this children's story until one night you were face to face with that creepy creature with jutting bones, messy greenish hair, an imposing gaze and a merciless smile. The way you begged for your life before him seemed interesting and very different from what he was used to seeing so you awakened something inside him that made him let you live.

• Eventually you returned to see him again and again until with each of his visits the fear faded and you were able to slowly trust the other until you formed the strangest friendship you had ever had.

• Gyutaro was the Upper Moon 06, at first you didn't understand it but he explained how everything worked. You told him about you and he about him until the bond between the two of you grew closer and closer. Knowing more about Gyutaro and the shortcomings he had in his past made you feel the need to give him absolutely everything that he was deprived of in his human life, both material and emotional.

• His affectionate greetings towards you increased and made your and his heart race, every time he came you gave him things like expensive outfits to show him how handsome he was, pretty haoris to cover him from the cold and complete collections of books so that he might have a new hobby, even very expensive fragrances that he would never wear.

• All of this overwhelmed Gyutaro and made him think that you were a bit stupid wasting all your money like that. Not so much about wasting those things on a demon because someone like Douma would maybe use all those gifts, but about wasting your money on someone as insignificant and unpleasant as him. You noticed that he didn't reject your gifts at first but then he started to "forget" them after his visits and that made you feel a little bad. You asked him if he didn't like the color of that shirt or if it wasn't his size, if that perfume didn't match him or something like that and there he told you to stop wasting your money on him.

• It was new for him to receive so much attention from someone, positive attention and it confused him a lot but in the end he managed to explain everything to you and in the end you felt a little more relieved.

• You wanted to win over Gyutaro because you were starting to like him but you didn't want him to be misinterpreted as if you wanted to buy him, you were just someone who was very thoughtful with the people you loved and your pocketbook allowed you to give very unique gifts. But now you had to go a little slower so as not to overwhelm Gyutaro, so you would save the exaggerated and expensive gifts for later, although you couldn't help but give the boy a beautiful bouquet of flowers every time he came to see you and paint a noticeable blush all over  his face when you handed it to him.

[seat-safety-switch]

Good news! After several months of appeals to the bureaucrats, fat cats, and showboaters at City Hall, they have approved my petition. What petition, you ask, your eyes widening in what my socialization exercise book tells me is a look of fear. It is my pedestrian petition.

You see, for the last couple years, delivery robots have been menacing Western civilization. At first, the cute little boxes on wheels would just do tiny fuck-ups. Maybe one would drive through an active crime scene, spreading blood and DNA evidence all over the place as it drove over the body. Perhaps one would adorably smash through a plate glass window of a department store, having detected a faster route to its destination.

The cops were powerless. These things had wheels, and that made them cars. And if there's one thing cops can't do, it's stop cars from behaving badly. After all, the cops drive cars, and if the cops ticket people in cars... they could accidentally ticket a cop, too. So they just held off for awhile. Awhile, that is, until my petition cleared, and By-Law 69-B: Reclassification of Pedestrians Act, was approved. This made the robots into, as you might have guessed, regular old pedestrians, like you and me.

Sure, the first week or so was a bloodbath, as law enforcement opened fire on any robot that so much as beep-booped too close to their cars. After they got tired and had a nap, though, the rest of us got to have our fun, too. For instance, I was waiting at the light the other day, when a Panera Bread-emblazoned robot was slowly toodling across the crosswalk in front of me. I immediately floored it. Working the wheel, I jagged my vehicle into a hard right turn without checking if I had the right of way, heartlessly crushing the robot to a billion pieces of high-impact polycarbonate beneath the knobby offroad tires of my long-wheelbase seven-seat SUV.

I'll never forget the pitiful moans it made as it died, nor will I forget the incredible sandwich that it contained within. And the best part is that it was free of both guilt and any legal complications, thanks to the state's tacit endorsement of vehicular manslaughter. After all, driving a car is hard enough: why add uncomfortable laws about having to look out for other road users?