#or he could be plotting to attack

[blahlahblash]

This was a trend on TikTok, right? I think so

[petite-phthora]

Do you think it was a date?

[DP x DC fic]

[Love at first... murder? - part 5]

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Part 1

Ao3

---

In-chat nicknames:

Daniel = Danny

Sharpshooter = Jazz

TooFine= Tucker

Chaos = Sam

TheCoolerDaniel = Danielle/Dani/Ellie

---

Private chat nicknames:

Bill = Danny

Pants = Jazz

---

As soon as Danny enters his apartment, face bright red, he takes his head into his hands and lets out a silent scream.

He could have said anything, and he panicked and went with Toodealoo Kangaroo???

At this rate, he’ll never get a partner.

As Danny stands there in misery, his phone starts buzzing with messages. Curious, he checks his phone to see what going on.

Uh oh.

---

Team Phantom 👻😎

Chaos: Guys check this out

Chaos: *link*

Chaos: The Joker escaped from Arkham again, but no one’s heard anything of him since, nor have they been able to find him

TooFine: @Daniel 👀

TooFine: ok the @ had been a joke but the fact that he has read it and not replied is concerning

Sharpshooter: @Daniel, what did you do?

Sharpshooter: @Daniel

Sharpshooter: I can see that you’re reading this, don’t ignore me.

TooFine: ohhhh someones in troubleee 👀

Sharpshooter: Tucker.

TooFine: 🤐

---

Danny takes a deep breath.

Well, it’s now or never. Let’s hope Jazz is feeling merciful.

---

Private chat

Bill: ok so you know how you said you would still love me if I was a worm?

Pants: I have no clue how this ties into the previous conversation, but yes. Why?

Bill: hypothetically

Bill: would you also still love me if I

Bill: hypothetically

Bill: accidentally

Bill: vibe checked someone that tried to uh

Bill: hypothetically

Bill: kidnap and or kill me??

Bill: 🥺🥺🙏

Pants: Danny, did you accidentally kill the Joker?

Bill: yes or no Jazz??!? 😩🥺

Pants: Yes, Danny. I would still love you if you, hypothetically, accidentally killed the Joker.

Bill: this is why you’re my favorite sister 🥹🥰😘

Bill: don’t tell Ellie 😳🫣

Pants: Danny, what happened?

---

Danny lets out a sigh of relief before proceeding to tell Jazz what happened.

---

Pants: Oh Danny.

Bill: are you mad at me?

Pants: I’m not mad at you, I just want you to stay safe.

Pants: While I don’t condone murder, I understand that it was self-defense and an accident. I‘m just glad that you’re alright.

Bill: 🥰💞😘

---

With a small smile on his face, Danny goes back to the groupchat.

---

Team Phantom 👻😎

Daniel: you know

Daniel: if I had a nickel for every time I’ve had to fight off an insane clown that attacked me 🤡

Daniel: I’d have two nickels

Daniel: which isn’t a lot but it’s weird that it’s happened twice, right? 🤔

Chaos: Damnit Danny, we leave you alone in a new city for a week and you already manage to get into a fight with one of Gotham City’s most infamous rogues

TooFine: actually its been 6 days 10 hours and 17 minutes

TooFine: so not even a full week yet

Chaos: Did you at least get a good few punches in?

Chaos: Danny?

TooFine: @Daniel ???

TooFine: if i had a nickel for every time danny said something concerning and then didnt provide context id be richer than vlad

Daniel: anyway, for completely unrelated reasons, @TooFine I need you to wipe some cams for me 😃

TooFine: danny im not wiping the cams again so no one will have proof of you tripping backward and falling ass-first into a trashcan

Chaos: Speaking of, Tucker do you still have that footage and can you send it to me?

TooFine: already done

Daniel: noo it’s nothing like that this time 😫

Daniel: pleaseeee 🥺🙏🙏

Daniel: I’ll get you an autograph from Tim Drake-Wayne?

TooFine: deal.

Daniel: 🥳🎉

Daniel: ok so the footage from somewhere around 3 am last night

Daniel: around some place named park row??

Daniel: I think it’s called?? 🤔

Daniel: though I’m pretty sure I’ve also heard some people refer to it as crime alley

Daniel: not sure why tho 🤷

TooTine: aye aye captain o7

Chaos: Danny, in an alley getting attacked by the fucking Joker: I wonder why this place is called crime alley

Daniel: stop bullying me 😠

Chaos: No

TooFine: hey danny r u sure thats right? i checked the cams n stuff but theres no available footage from the area n time u described

TooFine: its like someones already wiped it all

Daniel: oh!

Daniel: that’s so sweet of him  😊

Chaos: Wait who is this ‘him’?

TooFine: the joker????

Daniel: oh no not the Joker

Daniel: just some cute guy I met last night  

Daniel: he witnessed me killing the Joker 🫣

Daniel: and didn’t call the cops on me afterward 🥰💞

TooFine: def green flag

Chaos: Oh hell yeah, he’s a keeper

Chaos: Wait you killed the Joker?! I thought you just fought him off!

Daniel: it was an accident!! 😭😭

Daniel: he crept up on me and tried to grab me 😓

Daniel: so I got startled and because all I saw was a clown

Daniel: I just kinda punched his face in with my ghost strength… 😰

TooFine: f

Chaos: f

Sharpshooter: Have you gotten rid of the body yet? Did you leave behind DNA at the crime scene? Will I need to start saving up bail money or getting ready to enact the Fenton Break Out plan?

Chaos: Jazz asking the important questions here

Daniel: well, considering the footage was wiped

Daniel: and also the fact that no one’s found him yet

Daniel: I think it’s safe to assume it’s all taken care of

Daniel: that’s honestly really sweet of him though 🥰😊

TooFine: oohhhhh ur mystery boo??

Daniel: yeah, this random guy saw me vibe-checking the Joker

Daniel: and let me go home without any trouble

Daniel: pretty sure he’s the one who wiped the cams 🤔

Daniel: and then today he showed up at my apartment with flowers 🥺

Daniel: they were sweat peas!!!! 🥰🤩

Chaos: Was that to thank you for the murder orrrr?

Sharpshooter: Oh those are your favorite, was that on purpose?

Daniel: well I didn’t tell him

Daniel: so I’m not sure if he knew or if it was a coincidence 🤷

Daniel: but yeah then he took me out to this restaurant called Pete’s for dinner

Daniel: they had some amazing cannoli

Daniel: you should try it sometime if you get the chance

Daniel: and then after dinner he took me to the observatory!!!!!!! 🤩🥰

Sharpshooter: Gotham observatory?

Sharpshooter: Isn’t that the one with the special telescope, I think you mentioned it before

Daniel: yeah, the crystal-powered telescope!! 😍💞✨🤩❤️

Daniel: and at the end, he brought me home

Daniel: and he asked for my number!!!

TooFine: nice dude!

Chaos: The guy really went all-out and planned your dream date hu? So, what’s this mystery hunk’s name?

Daniel: oh I’m not sure, I didn’t ask 🙃🤭

Sharpshooter: Danny…

Daniel: yes?

Sharpshooter: Did you go on a date with a complete stranger who witnessed you commit a murder?

Chaos: How do you not even know his name?

Daniel: two words Jazz: Johnny 13

Daniel: and he’s not a stranger!! 😠

Sharpshooter: But you don’t know his name?

Chaos: We just can’t leave him alone, can we? Less than a week on his own and he already murdered one of Gotham’s most infamous rogues and then completely forgets the concept of Stranger Danger

Daniel: I mean he probably just found it when he tried to do some research on me or something

Daniel: probably got it from the school’s system now that I think of it 🤔

TooFine: dude who the hell is this guy??

Chaos: Who the fuck did you go on a date with?

Daniel: do you really think it was a date? 🥺😳

Daniel: I wasn’t sure

Daniel: cause he mainly took me out for dinner to thank me for the night before

Daniel: but then again

Daniel: he did get me flowers and ask for my number after he brought me back to my apartment 🤔

Daniel: like I wasn’t sure if I was reading the signals right…..

Daniel: but do you think that was a date? 🫣

Sharpshooter: Danny, for the love of the Ancients.

Sharpshooter: Who was it?

Daniel: oh, it was Red Hood 🥰

TooFine: damn dannys got that vigilante rizz

Sharpshooter: Red Hood? The crime lord?!

TooFine: former, actually

Daniel: what he said ^^

Chaos: Danny, you really have a type huh? Vigilantes with a Red theme. Who’s next? Red Robin?

Daniel: stop bullying me

TooFine: never

Chaos: Never

Daniel: on a different note, who changed my name in the chat again?

Sharpshooter: Ellie did.

Chaos: Ellie

TooFine: @TheCoolerDaniel

TheCoolerDaniel: 😎

TheCoolerDaniel: wait i just read back, danny’s dating a crime lord?? :0 👀

---

Taglist (for now, I’ll probably stop if I cant keep up):

@i-always-say-yea  @uraniumwizard

[scrawnytreedemon]

Just a girl and her hog, trying to save their dying world.

[buddiesmutslut]

I’m genuinely so fucking sick of the “you all would have loved it if it was Eddie who made that comment” take.

First of all, Eddie wouldn’t have made comment then, bc he knows how hard it is for Buck to talk about his emotions, & is REALLY good at giving him the space to talk about them, even if he does make jokes, they’re not out of pocket (the coming out scene, anyone? Breaking the tension with a joke & still being supportive without making a joke of his feelings.)

Secondly, even if Eddie DID make that comment, I’d probably still roll my eyes, but I’d be more willing to accept it. Do you wanna know why???

Who was the person that knew the details of what Buck was talking to his therapist about during their emergency session before the Buckley’s visit? Who is the first one they show at Buck’s side when he gets stuck in the warehouse trying to pull Saleh out after learning about Daniel?? Who is the one who was pacing downstairs in the station & making sure Buck was okay after the warehouse, and the one who warned him about his visitors??

Who was the one praying at Bobby’s bedside, right next to Buck in the hospital?

(I’ll give you a hint, it’s not the dude that’s had 10 minutes of fucking screen time that everyone forgot about post s1.)

It wouldn’t have been the same bc TOMMY AND EDDIE ARE NOT THE SAME. They are not on the same level of knowing Buck & understanding when to make jokes & what jokes to make. Your best friend, partner & co-parent of 6 years and the man that you haven’t even called your boyfriend yet are not on the same level of familiarity.

I get that you’re pissed that Tommy is being compared to Buck’s previous love interests (which would be the case, even if he wasn’t just as shitty & uninterested in Buck as a person as they all were) but if you genuinely think that he’s anywhere near Eddie’s level, EVEN PLATONICALLY, then I fear that you have been watching another show entirely, & I encourage you to watch more than just s7, bc that’s the only explanation I can come up with for why this fuck ass take exists.

[moongothic]

People keep on wanting to see Sanji and Crocodile fight in a Cross Guild match up, and I want to argue a more interesting match up

Crocodile vs Robin

Robin just uses Gigante Fleur to grow a giant version of herself, spits onto Crocodile to moisturize him and then squashes him like a bug

[theprincessandthepie]

replaying dragon age inquisition is just an exercise in “the rebel mages would not fucking do that”

[nemesis-is-my-middle-name]

it's actually kinda funny how the balance of nobles getting frenzied is already a little pearl clan heavy just by virtue of there being an uneven number, but then they also have a ride noble get pseudo-frenzied and rather than it being a diamond clan noble to even things out, it's ursaluna, who's also pearl. that's 4/5 pearl nobles who get some version of frenzied compared to only 2/5 for diamond. almighty sinnoh really said fuck these guys specifically. also a real "sneasler wins by doing nothing" sort of situation here

[tankgotstuckinthecircusgate]

if scars don't make man look good then being alive sure does

[vaugarde]

Thing about Rescue Team DX I don’t like is that it’ll tweak small visual things about the original and it’ll take away some really neat little things about the original

[teecupangel]

Desmond x avengers?

like, he becomes their private bartender or something, during the age of Ultron. After some magic Isu bullshit that sends him crashing into an alternate dimension and he finds a shady job, before catching Tony Starks eye. The he basically just works the ‘night shift’ serving their drinks and shit, and then the whole ‘Ultron takes over the world’ crap, and Desmond just really wants to sleep. Cus the hallucinations of his ancestors weren’t going away, and the bleeding affect wasn’t really helping with his first stable job. And he really didn’t want to fuck it up for himself.

I think there is an AO3 fic where Desmond becomes the bartender for Stark Industries? Or was it the Avengers Tower?

Maybe I’m thinking of two different fanfics???

All I know is that there’s a lot of Marvel x AC crossover in AO3 that I’m quite certain there’s at least one where Desmond becomes a bartender for either Stark Industries or the Avengers Tower.

Anyway, we’ll focus on MCU in this one since you did note in your ask that this is set during/before Age of Ultron and you made no mention of Hank being Ultron’s creator.

Desmond would probably not want to be employed by Stark Industries because they’re too… out in the open. Especially since Tony just flat-out confirms he’s freaking Iron Man so there are a lot of eyes on him, the terrorist groups, the media, the government…

People Desmond definitely didn’t want to be near because he doesn’t exist in this world… at all.

Sure, he got a fake identity and the dude that gave him his new identity as a “Desmond Miles” was cocky enough to say that he’s good to go and doesn’t have to worry but Desmond is worrying.

Hell, Desmond’s worry is mainly because the bleed of his ancestors had appeared as some kind of almost transparent ghost-like entities that only Desmond could see and they have opinions. Lots of opinions.

And yeah, okay, Desmond is fine with trying to set up a Brotherhood, Ezio, but Ratonhnhaké:ton is also right that they need to get a lay of the land first, damn it. Seriously, this place has superheroes, gods and freaking aliens! No, Altaïr, he wasn’t going to spend the rest of the week in a freaking library, he’s broke af and needs to work!

So yeah…

Killer high-tech robots out to eradicate all of mankind?

Desmond wasn’t even surprised anymore.

Just… tired.

He had been looking forward to just listening to the audiobooks Altaïr had pushed him into buying so they could learn more about the advancements of this world and how different it is from his own world while doing the laundry and prepping meals for next week.

Siiiggghhh.

Unorganized Notes:

Desmond’s ‘shady past’ gets a sorta free pass from SHIELD because he was working in a dingy bar that just so happened to be the secret hideout of Firebrand that he had been using to, well, get some funds for his next big plan. Iron Man took the time to request a drink from Desmond during their fight who had been hiding behind the bar (and waiting for a chance to run) and had been impressed by Desmond’s mixing skill (and his courage to stay and serve a drink). Really, Desmond getting employed by Stark had been a case of Desmond’s universally bad luck fucking him over like usual.

SHIELD does have him on their sights and they’ve told Tony about how Desmond is using a fake identity. Tony thinks there’s something more to it because Desmond is trying to be invisible at times then being charming in an ‘I’m-normal-totally-normal’ kind of way other times.

It should be noted that it was Natasha who realized that Desmond is more than he’s pretending to be and she did tell everyone that. Tony only started to pay more attention to Desmond because of her warning. Natasha is also the one who keeps trying to check Desmond’s reaction and she knows that his movements are too… quiet and precise to be normal. She’s not sure if he’s part of a similar program like the Red Room or if it’s something more but there’s definitely something there.

Clint is friendly with him because he thinks Desmond’s a pretty nice guy (and always makes the drinks Clint requests have an extra kick which Clint enjoys). He does agree that his movements weren’t that of a civvie but he’s more on the side of “this dude ran away from bad people and is trying to have a normal life” so he doesn’t really push and just treats Desmond as Tony’s (and the Avengers’) private bartender.

Bruce always says that he likes Desmond whenever he comes up in the conversation. Tony likes to tease it’s because Desmond likes asking Bruce what he’s researching and asking questions. Bruce had been distrustful about it at first but then he realized that Desmond doesn’t really mind if Bruce tells him something top secret or just some other not that secret experiment or scientific discover that he had just read about. Desmond wasn’t a scientist like Bruce and it was clear he didn’t have a comprehensive education in that field but Bruce also knows that he’s truly interested in whatever scientific babble Bruce gets into. The same could be said with any techie subjects Tony talks about. ‘Desmond’ just likes… asking questions. A lot.

Thor comes and goes the most erratically so, each time he visits, Desmond has already prepared a new cocktail for him to try next. Mead is still his favorite though so Desmond has a stock of that in his bar (god, he has his own small bar, what the hell is this life) and Desmond likes to ask about Thor and the Asgardian and the other worlds and, really, anything and everything Thor is fine with talking about, ‘Desmond’ would take it. It is because of his talks with Thor that the team believed Desmond has an interest in Roman/Greek Mythology because Minerva, Juno and Tinia were the only ‘gods’ that Desmond bothered to specifically ask.

Steve is the one who likes to ask about Desmond’s personal life and, really, the most dangerous of them because Steve is just so earnest when he asks questions and truly looked like he wanted to get to know Desmond because of who he is, not because he believes that Desmond might be an ex-spy or something that it’s hard not to spill more information than he should to Steve. Most information about Desmond’s past they have is actually from his conversations with Steve which really shows how weak he is to the man.

Also, I think if Wanda was to use her powers on Desmond, she’d actually see Desmond’s Bleeds for a few seconds much to her surprise.

And… when her powers prey on Desmond’s insecurities and fear, it has the side effect of… Desmond losing control of his body… and his Bleeds taking over at will.

[kuromi-hoemie]

lol i love how yesterday morning i was like “i love nightmares pls send me one” and i had 3 back to back 💀

*hesitantly* i ... i love nightmares..? send me one... once a week? no, twice a week

[fourthclone]

sb pls extract the thoughts i have about roche with a rapier from my brain NOW !

[wonder-worker]

"In reality Richard III invented a Woodville scare as a screen for his own conspiracy"

-A.J Pollard, "Richard III and the Princes in the Tower"

[torgawl]

a bit obsessed with the idea of kusakabe dying as a form of sacrifice to specifically protect/save somebody else. it's consistent enough with the theme of the past generation achieving no meaningful feats against significant threats but it's also ironic enough that someone without a technique and who claims their philosophy is primarily self-sacrificial - although he tends to stay from his own ideals in critical moments, proving he's not only brave when necessary but he does have a sense of responsabilty and guilt - ultimately redeems themselves through death resulting in the achievement of something his colleagues have failed to do. not that i'm wishing for him to die, i hope he doesn't. but it would also make a clear-cut distinction between him and a character like mei mei, who narratively serves a very similar purpose (besides her being a foil to nanami). to have someone be awarded by their selfishness just for it to not be worth much within a world and system that runs and sustains itself due to the sorcerer's labour power, whose only means of subsistence is to sell themselves away. a class of people who is doomed no matter what path they choose to take, as long as they do not break free from their duties and as long as the system doesn't collapse. a death that could serve as a symbol of punishment towards solidarity and altruism but a win for revolution.

[hal-o-ween]

During DnD this week Cibarius almost died but it's ok because they only lost half of one of their forearms 👍

[alisaint]

i feel like sometimes (many times) people get realism / "if this were to happen to a real person in the real world context, then this character would experience and grapple with x, y, z" mixed up with text / what that character is actually going through in the story which is always going to be constrained by time, space, and the creator's biases and experiences