#or do that thing like cats when they become long

[crazyvik97rpg]

Sebastian didn't have to wait long for William at all. He was happily waiting in his room, sitting on his bed still and reading through some of the documents he got. Once William was here - well, he wanted to read through the most important things too, to just know if he had any questions but everything was clear!

Oh, Sebastian was beyond happy to see him! He felt all giddy, way better than days before. His stomach was fine taking any kind of food now and he couldn't wait for William's promised burger for dinner today. But even better than that - he would come home. To his cats, his boyfriend. And William even revealed a little surprise - he brought Dexter over with him! So seven cats to cuddle - there literally couldn't be anything better.

"Awe, really? You brought him? ...That's great, honestly...I feel much better today", Sebastian smiled and slid off his bed to take William's hand, while his boyfriend very generously took his bag with spare clothes and such. Sebastian took the flowers and documents with him. Sebastian, unfortunately, still had his drainage so Dr Cole had explained to him exactly how to care for it - as well as gave him written instructions. One last good bye to Mr Shaw, his roommate - then they were on their way. Finally. Heading home.

When they left the hospital together, Sebastian felt the chilly breeze brush over his face and William's warm hand against his, squeezing. He didn't park far but they had to walk only a little bit. "Do you think we could get something sweet too on the way to the pharmacy?", Sebastian asked once they got to the car and he sat down on the passenger's seat. Sebastian had become quite the passenger prince, heh. William was a great driver anyway. "Like-...a croissant or something? I had breakfast but...I'm still kinda hungry", he smiled a little, just giddy and happy about the fact that they were finally together. And that they were going to spend a whole day together.

"Thank you so much, love. For today, I mean. You didn't have to take the day off and I know Sunday was very busy for you, so...thank you, I love you. I can't wait to get home and spend the day with you".

For I have sinned...

The principal cleared his throat, eyes scanning the notes that he had wrote down before this meeting. It already lasted an hour, and the teachers gathered in the faculty room were becoming restless and bored. But indeed there were some things to discuss, with the concert that the senior class was supposed to perform at the end of the semester, and with recent staff changes. 

William glanced down at his watch, sighing softly. His class was starting in 15 minutes, so at least, whether the meeting will be done soon or not, he will get to excuse himself. He looked out of the window, his mind wandering. Principal’s voice turned into white noise in the background. It was a pleasant day, late summer. But William was looking forward to a slightly cooler weather. Wearing all black could really be bothersome at times. 

“And lastly, I am pleased to announce that we have finally found replacement for the violin teacher. Dear Mr Tanaka, may he rest in peace, was with us for so many years that I’ve been concerned we won’t be able to find someone as good as to fill this position.” the principal spoke. “But Mr… Michaelis, was highly recommended to me, and he indeed has impressive references. He will be starting this week, so please welcome him warmly once he will arrive. Ah yes… about that. He will arrive today at noon, I need someone to pick him up from the train station and bring over for the tour around the school. Any volunteers?” 

William was barely listening, and definitely not paying much attention. He glanced at his watch again, and saw that it was time to leave, as his class was about to start. He raised his hand to excuse himself, and little did he know, he just volunteered.

“Father William! Excellent!” the principal exclaimed. “Just don’t be late, the train arrives at noon.”

“Train…?” William questioned, raising his brow. He had a feeling he was missing something…

***

Right after the meeting, William had to run for the class, so he had little time to clarify what exactly he had volunteered for. He was a piano teacher in this Music Academy, but also he served as a priest in local church. Well respected, and rather liked. So when he later found out it was about the new violin teacher, he didn’t refuse. Who, other than himself, would be a better choice to introduce a newcome to their community?

So even though he raised his hand by accident, he accepted this fate.

After classes, at noon, William took a taxi and drove to the train station, to pick up their new teacher. Wearing black trousers, and a black shirt with a thin tie, was absolutely dreadful in this weather, so William quickly found shelter under the roof of the station platform, that provided some shade.

The train had just arrived. William had no idea how Mr Michaelis looked like, but he figured he will just look for someone carrying a violin case with them. 

He was in for a bit surprise.

@crazyvik97

[whereispearlescentmoon]

I love the idea of the hybrid glitching trope in fics so much. Like the fandom has just determined that some hermits are part animal or mob or other and that sometimes they don’t get to choose how big that part is because of a glitch?

Cleo, Doc, Tango, Cub, and Jevin becoming hostile? Incredible angst potential but also humor because imagine you’re chilling with your buddy Cleo and she just starts burning in the sun and trying to eat you randomly, or Jevin keeps trying to jump into glass walls, or Tango keeps shooting fireballs at you, or Doc won’t stop hissing when you get too close and is suddenly terrified of cats. Cub is actually being relatively tame… as long as you stay away from any skulk sensors or shriekers so you don’t summon him.

For the more “animal” oriented hybrids, it’s more about wrangling than anything. Ren has gone full wolf and someone has to stop him from trying to chase down and kill Gem, Etho, and Zedaph, who will not stop running, because wolves kill foxes and sheep. No one can get False and Grian out of the sky (which is a problem because, evidently, a falcon can and will try to kill a parrot), XB disappeared into the ocean somewhere, and Scar, Beef, and Joel are… being relatively chill. Turns out a cat, a bull, and a raccoon are actually pretty easy to deal with comparatively.

As for the more esoteric or out there hermit hybrids, things are even weirder. Skizz wants to track down Impulse but Impulse won’t leave the nether and Skizz can’t enter it right now. Pearl is shapeshifter, so she’s just resigning herself to uncontrollable shifts and trying not to break anything when she randomly sprouts horns or wings or a tail. Juppet’s “handler” is gone so he’s fully just out of commission, and had to be placed in his little one by one base for the time being because he can no longer move. X looks fine outwardly, but he’s actually struggling to not fully turn into void mist inside his suit.

And for the hermits who I don’t headcanon as hybrids (Bdubs, Keralis, Hypno, Wels, and Mumbo) they’re just trying to keep things in line but maybe not doing a great job given just how quickly the situation would probably devolve, especially as X is trying to fix server issues (being the only admin who’s currently… reachable) while also trying to remain corporeal.

[burningcheese-merchant]

I know that it is highly unlikely that it is the case, but come and give it a thougjt with me (Yandere Spice with a twist).

What if: Burning Spice, despite being completely obsessive and being the sadomasochist he is, routinely cuts off the heads of animals and cookies and brings them to her the first time with a love letter (he used to be the Herald of Change, so I'd imagine he's got- and retained- some brains, enough to at least write a psychotic obsessive love letter).

Now, Golden Cheese is obviously gonna freak the f out and gape as he shoves the head into her arms (probably throw it into the air and back up in panic) while Burning Spice- though displeased at first, just grins manically at her reaction soon enough (maybe even laughing), before he grabs it and shoves the letter and head onto her hands again and leaving.

Golden Cheese, having noticed his reaction to her throwing it, becomes concerned with what he might do if she doesn't accept the 'gifts', decides to keep it (She flies hella fast and enters through her window and hides it in a secret compartment in her room, before creating a hidden room the other gifts in the future).

Now, here's the twist:

Despite the shock and horror she displayed to Burning Spice's gift, she knew that deep down... She fucking loved it. She silently revels in it, even. At having so much of the Beast- A cookiebeing you could practically almost consider primordial and all-powerful-'s attention and taking up so much of their headspace. To be obsessed over adored by someone like that, so much so that they would go out of their way to behead someone and something and write a love letter daily, just to give it to her as a gift-

In short, she absolutely loves the attention she will never say it and will keep that to her grave and Burning Spice and everyone else is none the wiser of it. Of how she'd kept every letter and laminated every single one with the care and cautiousness and love one would use when holding thin glass, of how she intentionally goes out alone every day for a few minutes just so Burning Spice would 'see an opening' and give his gift, where Golden Cheese would then act terribly disgusted and horrified, and then keep the gifts. Ignorant of how she has a room full of the 'gifts' he's given her- which she'd taken the time to personally taxiderm each and every one, before hanging it on the wall like a reward or trophy. Of how she'd come to the room every night to just adore it just the sight makes her want to coo and purr in delight for a few minutes to an hour, before going to bed and resting.

Sorry for the rambling and the long paragraphs 😅😅

This is such a horrifying (in a good way) concept that I MUST acknowledge it and give my take!!! Gonna put it under a cut because this is particularly dark

Yandere Spice basically acting like a cat is so fucking funny to me lol I love it

I'm so glad you think Spice is a smart guy due to having been the Herald of Change/History, because I think that too! He simply HAS to be intelligent, even wise to a degree. It would be ridiculous if he wasn't; being buff doesn't automatically mean you're dumb. And I LOVE the letter thing, I've always headcanoned Spice (the "normal" one, not the yandere one) as writing Golden romantic poetry (and her liking it lol. It helps win her over).

Now, with the murder gifts: of course Golden is horrified. Not only has Spice ended innocent lives, but he did it for her. In a way, it's her fault, and she feels horrible. Animal, person/cookie, doesn't matter, Spice has killed again and he gives the fruits of his sinful labor to her as a declaration of "love". It's sick. No matter how deranged she finds him, he finds a way to sink lower. (But... one thing: he never hurts birds. He has never once brought her a dead bird, because even he knows that's a step too far and she REALLY won't like it. It's the one little drop of care and tact that he possesses.)

But that twist: somewhere beneath all those layers of shock, disgust and righteous anger is... flattery. Sick, twisted flattery. There's nothing Golden loves more than being praised, than being worshiped, than being showered with attention and gifts... and Spice is doing that. He's feeding her ego, albeit in the worst way possible. And so great and terrible is her ego, no matter what she does to temper or suppress it, that somewhere deep down inside, she enjoys what he's doing. That he'll gladly kill for her. That he'll show off his hard work in search of her praise and admiration. She is a goddess and he knows it. He is giving her the adulation she rightfully deserves.

Now, of course, this contradicts her normally altruistic nature, and she has a massive crisis of conscience. She keeps everything Spice gives her, she keeps the heads and the letters and stores them all properly, because... Well, she tells herself that it's better this way. If she refused them, he would retaliate, if not against her then against another innocent. If she preserves the heads, she can later discover who they belonged to and hopefully return them to the person's family (and it was the least she could do; clean them up, give them back even a fraction of their grace and dignity...). If she reads the letters, she'll have better insight into his mind and how he thinks, and thus be able to formulate a better response to him and his behaviors. These excuses are what she mutters under her breath over and over as she sneaks the heads into her room, through the window so no one sees her. As she tidies and laminates the letters, and stores them in a secure folder that she tucks into a box under the bed (which eventually becomes boxes, the more and more letters she gets). As she expertly taxidermies the heads and places them on nice shelves in a hidden closet in her room. It's better this way. She has to do this.

...and these are all true, they really are. But at the same time... Existing alongside this pain and terror and crushing guilt, is the sick joy in knowing that she has someone wrapped around her finger this completely. And a Beast, too. The Beast of Destruction, no less. Burning Spice himself, heads over heels in love with her, willing to do anything to have her. It shouldn't please her to have a monster practically at her beck and call, but... it does. It really, truly does. And no matter how much she hates herself for it... It's never enough to make it stop.

Sometimes, she'll hint at a specific person she doesn't like - usually a known enemy of her kingdom - just to see if he'll do what she thinks he will. Sure enough, the next time they meet, he has that person's head ready for her, all but puffing his chest out in pride and grinning that hideous, face-splitting, cruel grin of his. She acts upset, but she's actually pleased to know that she was right: he WILL do what she tells him to, just to please her.

Sometimes she'll stand there admiring her ever-expanding taxidermy collection, congratulating herself on her hard work; she does a better and better job every time. (And when the guilt comes bubbling to the surface, asking her why they're still here and not with their loved ones so they can have a proper funeral, she tells it that Spice will lose it if he catches her giving them away. Or she'll be made out to be the one responsible, since she's the one who has them. Or they're dead, their souls have departed to the afterlife, what happens to their mortal vessels matters not anymore...)

Sometimes, when she's in bed at night, she'll pull out the letters and read them. Sometimes she'll read one, sometimes a few, sometimes all of them. Some are surprisingly sweet and romantic, full of oddly gentle and doting words; she can feel the warmth and affection soaked into the page. Others are downright vulgar; she feels her own face catch fire as she reads through what are obviously his fantasies, the list of ways in which he wants to pleasure her so long and graphic that she suspects he wrote them one-handed, if you know what I mean. The rest are just flat-out deranged: feverish rants about his ownership of her, how he hated and wanted to get rid of those around her, how she took everything from him (his power, his sanity, his heart, his soul) and he was willing to pardon it if she gave him everything of hers in turn. How he will never stop hunting her. How he will slaughter thousands to get to her. How he will bring the world to ruins just to have her to himself. Madness. All-consuming delusion that she fears is incurable.

But the worst part is... she doesn't know if she wants it to be anymore.

All she can do now is... hope he never finds out. Hope he never knows she feels this way. That she relishes his kills, his gifts. That she has a godforsaken trophy room now. That now she's as starved for his attention as he is for hers. (And he will. The idea is simply too tantalizing. He WILL find out eventually, someway, somehow - and when he does... Oh boy.)

TL;DR: Golden is so greedy that her greed has warped her into being as bad as Spice, at least in her own way. They probably deserve each other at this point. Pure, incorrigible arrogance and psychopathy all the way down. God/Witches have mercy on us all

[alice-the-demon]

Hell Tower Lore (Demons: classes and stages)

Ah, Hell... The place of damnation par excellence, full of people that didn't make the nicest choices when they were alive and/or have a very bad behaviour, ruled by 7 monsters that represents the famous 7 deadly sins and the worst of humanity.

Demons are creatures with animal-like behaviours that can be really dangerous depending on what kind of personality they have and on the powers that reflects the sin they represent, but can be defeated if exposed to the sun and they'll become a pile of dust. Pretty much like vampires.

When a person ends up in hell they either become an Imp or a Hell Animal:

Imps can be recognised by their "almost human" look: they have pointy ears, claws, fur, a long tail and horns (+ an extra feature that differs for each demon depending on what sin they represent), their way of acting is similar to cats. They're the weakest kind of Demons, people who in their earthly lives did some light yet bad things, like hurting someone else once (verbally or physically) or having done some controversial actions without redeeming themselves... In short, overall people that may seem okay but revealed to be problematic to have around. They can either transform into Angels when they get redeemed with the help of an Archangel, or in a Hell Animal if their behaviour/mindset gets worse during their stay in Hell.

Hell Animals are anthropomorphic creatures that have less of a human aspect and more of an, well, animal. They're people who, in their earthly lives, either hurt/abused someone else multiple times, contributed to a grave crime/genocide, have a very messed up mentality or somehow did all of the above. They're generally criminals who are better to avoid, they might even start a deadly fight if you accidentally bump into them. Although they can be very hotheaded and hard to reason with, they can become better and transform into an Imp... But most times these people can become so rotten that they spiral even deeper into their sin, to the point they transform into horrid beasts.

Hell Beasts are the final stage of Demons, they're monsters as big as houses and they're recognised as the most dangerous and mortal creatures in creation. On the contrary of the previous stages, the Beasts aren't capable of going back or redeeming, they've lost the last piece of humanity they had and become violent beings with their first thought in mind being attacking and/or eat anything they see. They live in the forest at the center of Hell, near to the castle where the 7 Deadly Sins live and away from the Imps and Hell Animal's city so that they don't end up mauled.

Demons are categorised in 7 classes and they all have different powers as I'll show here.

(⚠️CW for suggestive pose and sexual themes in the Lust section, +16⚠️)

Wrath

The most destructive kind, they have super strength and high durability, their claws are capable of cutting through hard metals. They are recognizable by their more pumped arm muscles, red fur and the tip of their tail resembling a lightened fuse of a bomb.

Imp: they might be small but still capable of doing some damage if provoked. When angry they might act like cats. It's kinda adorable tho

Animal: they look like anthropomorphic bulls. They're more easy to make them angry and can defeat anyone by simply flicking the opponent.

Beast: bull-like monsters with multiple legs. They spend most of their time giving headbutts on the tree trunks of the forest or attacking other beasts/anyone who meets their eyesight.

Pride

Let's be fair, they're the hardest ones to bear. This kind of Demons believe they're the best and most powerful ones, although they don't really don't have anything spectacular aside from being able to run as fast as a cheetah. They are recognizable by their more pumped leg muscles, orange fur and the tip of their tail resembling an arrow.

Imp: they don't have many peculiarities, you can see them strut all the time.

Animal: they look like anthropomorphic fishes. Now they're both quick both on land AND water, their teeth are more sharp and their fur is constantly wet.

Beast: piranha looking creatures with limbs to walk on land. They are so quick that you can barely follow them with your eyes. It only takes a moment of distraction to find out one second later that one of your limbs is missing and that it's in the monster's jaws.

Greed

The most hated ones in Hell. With their increased stealth abilities and ability to fly these bastards can be excellent thieves and scammers, giving Hell many economical problems because of it. They are recognizable by their bird wings, yellow fur and the tip of their tail resembling a claw.

Imp: they spend most of their time in the streets, always finding new victims to snatch their wallets or anything expensive looking.

Animal: they're half Imps and half ravens. You can see them soaring in the skies of Hell, often straight up nosediving towards the localised objective. 60% of the time they also accidentally grab the person they're stealing from because of how big their claws are.

Beast: raven-looking monsters with many claws, they live hidden in the bushes of the forest. If you have the misfortune to get caught by one of them you won't be able to get freed by their grasp, as their claws are as strong as the thickest metal around.

Envy

These guys have amplified senses, capable of seeing objects and hearing even the smallest whisper from great distances. It might seem like a pretty weak power at first, but used well it can be helpful in battles to anticipate the enemy's moves. Plus these Demons often get paid to stalk others by request. They are recognizable by their fly wings, green fur and their tail resembling a magnifying glass.

Imp: they live their lives normally with the exception that most of them give a menacing look to anyone they cross. Other times you can see them angrily mumbling with themselves as they listen to a conversation from the other side of the city.

Animal: they look like insects with humanoid limbs. These guys are pretty much known for giving the coldest insults to others, preferring to obsess over others's business than taking care of themselves.

Beast: fly-looking creatures with multiple eyes all over their bodies. It's impossible to catch or even touch them, as they see and hear everything around them. They're as fast as Pride Imps.

Sloth

The most innocuous ones, more or less. Their tail contains a special poison that can paralyse anyone for half an hour, but they don't use it much. They don't even trim their fur, making them look like giant walking hairballs. They are recognizable by their huge blue fur and the tip of their tail looking like a scorpion one.

Imp: it's rare to see one outside of their homes or of the Hell's Spa, and it's even rarer to see one doing something relevant like... I dunno, paying taxes or something.

Animal: they look like anthropomorphic llamas. They smell like rotten cheese and their breath is so bad that no one can describe what it smells like without going in a coma.

Beast: a mix of llama and goats creatures. They don't do anything. They just lay down on the grass field of the forest and do nothing. Their fur can be trimmed, although with much difficulty, and used as pillows, sheets and more, but it's rare to get this type of fur because of how these Beasts are such easy targets for the other ones to eat.

Gluttony

The tail of Gluttony Demons produces a special sweet liquid that can make you feel dizzy and see hallucinations when swallowed (think of it like LSD but in liquid form). Because of that they're often abducted by greedy people to squirt all of the juice from the tail and sell it to others, commonly known as "Demon Juice". They are recognizable by their bat wings (I forgot to draw that in the Imp below, whoops) purple fur and the tip of their tail resembling a fruit-looking sphere.

Imp: some of them have dark circles under their eyes and a little scruffy appearance. Usually they carry around a cup so that they can drink their "Demon Juice" whenever and wherever they want... Or just directly put the tail in their mouth and munch it.

Animal: they have some characteristics of a bat, making them look like vampires. They have an even more scruffy look, most of the Gluttony Animals have their tails ruined and shriveled up due to the gland that produces that liquid being damaged by squeezing continuously the tail. Because of this, half of them assault or manipulate other Gluttony Demons to desperately drink their Demon Juice and make them feel "good" again.

Beast: bat-like monsters. They are always hungry, always in search of anything to eat, always screeching loudly and desperately. They're just as dangerous as Wrath Beasts, capable of sucking out the blood of a being as big as them in less than a half a minute. The 7 Deadly Sins, taking turns every day, have the job to feed these Beasts in particular, so that they don't eat most of the other Beasts or, in the worst case, that they don't exit the forest and add more havoc than there already was in Hell.

(⚠️LAST WARNING, ALTHOUGH IT'S NOT EXPLICIT, THE SECTION BELOW CONTAINS MENTIONS OF PROSTITUTION AND SEXUAL ACTIVITIES⚠️)

Lust

Most of these demons live in wealth (gee, I wonder why) yet they're also really feared by others because of their ability to control anyone's mind by simply listening to their voices. They are recognizable by often wearing revealing clothes, having pink fur and the tip of their tail resembling a heart.

Imp: they can be really nice companions/friends with benefits, especially if you want some nice... Uhm... Services. They might be cheaper than the Lust Animals, but their quality is just as high, especially with their long slimy tongues.

Animal: they're viper-like creatures with additional heads as hands, to not be confused with Hell Snakes. They're sneaky and some even cruel with others, they get paid even more than Imps by people with... Questionable tastes, to say the least.

Beast: they're three headed snake monsters. Even by just looking at one of their 6 eyes you'll enter in a trance state and be the next appetizer of this ravenous and slimy creature.

[rip-headphones-users]

Lampert Headcannons I Have

: )))))) i liek thinkung ab out himme : )))))))

(Long post sorry)

Lampert is Swedish-American (due to type of tail plug + the lamp itself being Swiss in design)

He speaks in a fairly flat toned voice, in a Boston (Massachusetts/New England) accent

This is for the fact that I believe he could pull off a killer Scout TF2 impression, and it would be really funny.

He wont do it in front of anyone though, he’s too shy.

(Alternatively, I will accept a Southern US accent.)

Lampert loves to give compliments to people, but he is too judgy/critical to find anything worth complimenting, and by the time he does its usually at an awkward point where it would be weird to compliment them.

Lampert prefers residing in lamps because he’s scared of the dark, as well as utility.

Lampert will typically sleep standing up underneath a plastic furniture protector

If invited to a group sleepover, lampert will either transform into/shift his consciousness into a nightlight in order to light the room the others are sleeping in

He doesn’t play videogames often, but he prefers playing single player rpgs, his favorite games are OneShot, ChibiRobo, as well as the Mother series and anything from the Sonic franchise.

He once agreed to a days long infinite rokea-wide game of prop hunt with paintball guns and several friends where he was the “prop”. It’s probably his favorite memory but he has sworn off ever doing it again due to the mess it caused. (He has agreed to smaller games though)

Lampert genuinely enjoys cleaning things whenever it’s unrelated to himself/rokea, and will stop on random floors of the regretevator to clean them when he is in a bad mood in order to calm himself.

His goal one day is to become an interior designer, and he is currently studying to become one.

His tail behaves more like a cat’s rather than a dog’s, but will still occasionally wag when he’s happy.

Cannot get sick, but the concept of something being able to get sick is so mortifying to him that he is a germaphobe anyway

He can, however, catch a computer virus. He is not nearly as scared of this cause he knows how it works (like a regular virus)

Lampert “touches” things by sensing the vibration of them when he makes contact. He cannot feel texture, but will immediately be able to tell you the temperature of an object in Celsius, Kelvin, and Fahrenheit.

He makes a faint purring noise because his “heart” is a motor.

His favorite artists/bands are Mitski, Autoheart, and Roar.

Prefers dressing in nice clothes, but usually just wears sweatpants and sweaters/t-shirts for convenience (doesn’t want to get the nice clothes dirty)

Will never admit it, but he gets very happy when people say he looks good/cute/pretty/handsome because it means to him that he picked a good lamp to reside in. Lamp gender euphoria.

Has a glowing rubber duck water toy that he resides in whenever there is a situation where he needs to be in water. It is abstract enough for him to not know what it is/that its a bird

He would lose in a 1 v 1 with an ostrich.

Has a modified windex bottle in his fort that he smokes out of like a bong.

NThe other robots take his almost compulsive need to use cleaning chemicals hand sanitizer as lampert being a stoner, when he actually is just that worried about germs. (No wonder hes friends with that infected guy)

While he doesn’t try to be overtly mean, lampert finds himself accidentally insulting people he doesn’t like. He will insult his friends on purpose though.

Likes pulling spur of the moment pranks on friends

Found an insect crawling around inside of his body cavity while doing maintenance on himself. He still has not recovered mentally.

Creation/physical properties:

Lampert is sorta like a sapient star, just less “powerful”. Technically though he’d be a solar flare, (this is a slightly niche reference but sorta like how the solar bodies in Dogsbody by Diana Jones are sapient/anthropomorphic)

Actually I think you should just read the first chapter of dogsbody so you kinda get what i mean here. You wont understand whats going on at first but that’s ok you aren’t supposed to.

Outside of his body, he is an abstract glowing form of pure light. He is perfectly see through, and the only indication of his presence is the light cast on the world around him.

When viewed through an infrared camera, he is vaguely shaped like a humanoid entity standing at roughly 6 feet tall (at current day), but is incredibly blurry. No further details can be made out.

Images and live footage of Lampert in his “purest form” are known to cause mild nausea, as he is not meant to be viewed this way.

Passing through Lampert will warm the object slightly. Objects do not overheat, but passing through him is known to give a warm, comforting feeling, much like laying in a sunbeam.

Lampert’s possession of objects will slowly alter the shape and size over time to slowly become more humanoid. The time it takes from an objects initial possession to become full anthro is between six months to two years.

Because lampert has to “grow” into himself, He has had several models of lamp that he has possessed over the course of his lifetime. He just finds that he tends to keep going back to lamps (beyond his fear of the dark) his first forms are more childlike to reflect his age. One he looks back on fondly has a fish pattern on the lampshade.

Lampert cannot possess what is already “possessed” (aka: living.)

Lampert doesn’t technically have biological parents. Technically the “parent” he has is whatever star shot the flare his consciousness was spawned into. He doesn’t remember this event, just the fact that it happened (do you remember YOUR birth??? I hope not.)

He was found and adopted by Mannequin Mark (Pops) and Wallter (Dad).

[laswells-ashtray]

I'm so sorry if I'm clogging your inbox but I'm nothing but a hyperactive gal with chronic brain rot

Domestic Kate Laswell?

Domestic Kate Laswell who gets into not-so-quiet arguments with household appliances.

Domestic Kate Laswell who sits at the kitchen table and doomscrolls while her wife makes a recipe she saw on Instagram reels.

Domestic Kate Laswell in ratty lounge clothes with her hair pulled in a tangled ponytail, somehow holding a cat, book, and a bag of Lays.

I saw Kate Laswell and immediately knew what I had to do. Not apologising for this, I like Laswell posting so it's gonna be long. Also, when it comes to Station Chief Kate "I love my wife" Laswell, there is no clogging my inbox.

Kate Laswell, the esteemed woman she is routinely argues with their toaster because it's broken but she refuses to get a new one because it was the first ever appliance she bought herself. She and her wife have the money to purchase hundreds of new toasters but she refuses because this one is her toaster. Sarah Laswell has walked into their kitchen on multiple occasions to find Kate talking to this fucking toaster. "You under-toast the bread and then you over-toast the bread. Just toast my fucking bread correctly." "Let's get a new-" "No."

Kate, who has a Pinterest board full of recipes that she thinks Sarah might like to try and she'll send them to her wife only to find that it's the same recipe from the Instagram reel that Sarah had bookmarked last night. So, now she sits and watches videos about behind-the-scenes facts from movies while Sarah argues with herself about how much garlic is too much garlic.

Kate, who spends her day off on the couch with Minnie, their Maine Coon, on her lap with a book resting on Minnie's back and a bag of chips held between her chest and the cat. She's wearing sweatpants that are so old she can't identify what logo used to be on the leg. Her shirt is definitely Sarah's because there's green paint around the collar and it matches the green in the painting above their mantel.

Kate Laswell, who can routinely be heard threatening to put one of her cats in the soup. What soup, you ask? The soup.

Kate, who very `begrudgingly` agrees to let Sarah buy the cat Halloween costumes. And then days later sends John a series of photos. Minnie, their big, glorious, sophisticated girl, is dressed like a hotdog. Borris, her favourite grumpy old man, has a stupid Dracula cape. Dolly, has on a costume that makes her look like Yoda. And John's favourite of their cats, Dot, the little mold spore has tiny ladybug wings because they were the only thing small enough to fit her. Kate makes a photo of the four cats and Sarah her laptop wallpaper. John makes a photo of Dot in her tiny wings his phone wallpaper.

Kate Laswell, the professional woman who after having spent 26 hours awake sits and scrolls through Facebook one night on Sarah's phone. Except she doesn't actually look at any of the posts, she just sits scrolling with her thumb for ten minutes before she realises what she's been doing. Sarah waits until after she's tucked her wife in to lose it laughing in the other room.

Kate and her wife who parallel play on their phone. They'll sit on the couch with a movie they've seen countless times in the background while Kate plays solitaire and Sarah does her daily word search on her favourite app.

Kate, who does that thing I've noticed literally every woman do when they're on the phone at home and they start doodling in the corner of the nearest bit of paper. It starts as squiggles, then they draw black circles and eventually there are various little flowers scattered across the page.

Kate, who absolutely adores the movie 9 to 5 and will throw it on whenever everything in her job starts to become a bit too suffocating. Sarah recognises the action and immediately orders dinner from their local Thai place. The man who owns it knows the two by name, she doesn't have to order, she just has to call up and she hears "it'll be about half an hour" over the phone. More often than not on those days they'll fall asleep on the couch together like they did at the start of their relationship.

Kate and her wife, who like to make gingerbread cookies at Christmas and decorate them. Sarah is amazing at it when she's not giving the gingerbread ladies gumdrop titties. And then there's Kate, she tries, she genuinely does but every year a photo of her gingerbread folks gets sent to a group chat with her, Sarah, John and Nikolai where they are subsequently body-shamed beyond belief. She saves some for Nik anyway and he accepts them gratefully.

Kate and her beloved blue shirt that she wears to work and owns three of because the first one mysteriously disappeared. Coincidentally, Sarah started baking in the kitchen in nothing but a pale blue shirt and Batman underwear around the same time. Her second has a blood stain on the cuff from where John had grabbed her, not knowing his palm was sliced open and he'd stained the light material with blood. He had felt horrible, Kate brought up the time she'd drunkenly thrown up on a pair of his nice shoes years ago when they were younger and more reckless. They moved on. That shirt is now her "Sarah has roped me into helping paint" shirt. If anyone fucks up her last shirt then she's asking Nikolai, John and Sarah separately all to get her a new one for her birthday so she'll have a decent stock of them.

Sarah, who has to keep a stock of Dr Pepper and Mountain Dew in the fridge because Dr Pepper is her favourite and Mountain Dew is Kate's but the other woman would never admit it or buy it for herself because she's weirdly embarrassed by it. But amongst a very small group of people, it is common knowledge, Station Chief Kate Laswell's favourite drink is Mountain Dew.

And lastly:

Kate Laswell, the woman who once snapped a man's neck with his own gun, is also the woman who loves her wife's family. When they get asked to babysit baby Katie [named after Laswell], the two women agree before the question is even half out of the relative's mouth. In fact, you're right, they should keep baby Katie for the night just to give her parents a night off because they're kind like that. No other reason. And this little girl adores her aunts, if Kate is near then the toddler is by her side clinging to her pant leg.

So, they go shopping and get snacks. They also get baby Katie a new stuffed elephant because she really needed one and who were they to deprive her. Then they go home and change into their respective comfy clothes. Katie's is a little shark onesie and the two women take no less than 19 photos. They spend the day drawing pictures with little Katie, and eventually, it results in the toddler colouring in Sarah's tattoos and drawing Kate some of her own. Eventually, they order some takeout from their local Chinese place and watch Zootopia with their favourite niece. Hours later Sarah takes a photo of big Kate fast asleep on the couch with little Kate asleep on her chest. Kate has an arm around the little girl and the toddler has a fistful of her t-shirt. The next day they very reluctantly take their niece home but not without managing to persuade her parents to let them take her in two weeks time again.

[jaypentaghast]

He's so real though. Torture aside, I'm betting that stretching thing they did to Ed would do wonders to my back.

[moinsbienquekaworu]

I just spent like 20 minutes thinking about soup

[arolesbianism]

I’ve been having a rough few days, but I’ve been feeling a bit better so I decided to make some lil thingies for some spiraling upwards kitties :3

[nomairuins]

also me and my sims have bonded deeply theyve got a whole backstory that i cant rly represent well in the sims but its rly cute TO ME

[diniidjarin]

. .

[enough-spider-noir-stuff]

If I may posit, it's gotta be strange to see a version of you that made it to being 'old'. Obviously I'm biased towards my own interpretation of Comics Noir Pete, but he doesn't seem the sort to believe he'll last that long. - @canary-song

oh Definitely. Pete is gonna take one look at Noir and then immediately make fun of him to hide the fact that he's having an existential crisis. And now that I've got lots of spider-folk together I really should throw in some spider goddess weirdness... just a little bit. for funsies.

[teaboot]

I've never had a cat before and I'm hoping to get one soon. Do you have any advice?

Treat a new cat as you would a new roommate. Give them space and time to settle, establish a pattern and a rhythm, and in time they may choose to become friends and spend time with you. Dont force a friendship.

Use simple words and repetition to establish communication. Words like breakfast, treat, snack, lunch, supper, dinner, food, and eat all basically mean, "I am feeding you; expect to be fed", but it's a lot for a little guy to remember. I just say "Dinner" when I mean "cat food is coming", and so my boy knows exactly what I mean when I say it. As a plus, using only one word for snack time means he has no idea what the other words mean, so I can talk about food in front of him without ruling him up.

Pay attention to body language. Cats all have different personalities, and you'll learn their likes, dislikes, and messages over time this way. Son boy here loves anything with plumbing but dislikes getting wet- his favourite blanket to chew and snuggle goes on his favourite chair, and he gives me a specific gesture when he wants me to kneel down so he can jump onto my shoulder.

Read into problematic behaviour. Cats pee in weird places when they're hurting, in distress, or have insufficient of unclean litter box space. Biting, attacking feet , and knocking things off tables often means they're understimulated and need you to play with them, or at least need some kind of enrichment or puzzle to tackle. Tail flicking can be frustration or irritation. Purring is usually good, but may also be self-soothing behaviour to alleviate pain, encourage healing, and relieve anxiety, like over-grooming.

Like children, "bad" behaviour isn't malicious- it usually means there's something you aren't seeing.

Learn how your cat expresses love. Loads of people think cats are uncaring, cruel, and indifferent, but the truth is, they're just not dogs. Spending time near you, showing an interest in tools you're using or projects you're working on, sitting the way you sit, laying on their back, rubbing on your legs, wiping their face on your shoes when you get home- these are signs that your cat is enamored with you. You're their family, they feel safe and protected around you, they're curious about things you enjoy and want everyone to know you're family.

Set reasonable expectations. Again, cats are not dogs.We bred dogs to desire our approval- cats walked into our lives themselves. They have no human-programmed need to fulfill a duty or perform a task to your standards.

Training cats to do tricks isn't as hard as people say, but the willingness or interest in doing the trick is more heavily reliant on personality and mood. Some cats will refuse all but the most basic requests- I'm lucky in that Ollie understands and is willing to do several, provided I don't abuse his trust and he's not crowded or overwhelmed or just bored of doing it over and over in a short period.

Ollie, for example, knows Up to stand on his back legs and hold my hand, Down to get to a surface I indicate, Out to emerge from a closed space, Come to find me where I am, Help? when I'm offering to let him use me as an elevator, Dinner when I understand he's hungry and am getting food, and when I put on his collar he knows to climb into his carrier 'cause we're going somewhere. And he'll do any of these about 90% of the time, either ignoring me or phoning it in when there's something interesting somewhere else, or if he's feeling anxious.

Lead by example. If you dread taking them to the vet, they'll see the anxiety in your body language and behaviour and likely learn to hate it, too. Again using my guy an example, I starred taking him on walks long before his first vet appointment, just to get used to his carrier and leash. Then his first checkup was relaxed and informal, with plenty of treats, and I let him explore the examination room with permission from the tech. Now he loves going, so I'm not stressed about taking him, so I don't stress him out in turn, and the vest doesn't have to deal with a stressed out cat slowing things down and fighting with them.

Make sure your sources are good ones, and also good ones for you. I will recommend Jackson Galaxy's YouTube channel for cat advice because a lot of what he does matches up with what I've learned and know to be true. I don't personally recommend Ceasar Milan because I personally find his methods distressing to recreate regardless of efficacy, so even if that advice was useful, *I'd* be miserable, and it'd just be trading one issue for another.

Have a person who can help. You never know when you might end up out of town overnight unexpectedly, or when your place may need serviced or fumigated, or if you may be called out of town. Before getting a cat, research reliable pet sitters, house sitters, pet daycares, whatever, just in case.

Consider pet insurance. No long spiel here, just think about it. Especially if you don't know your cats ancestry or potenyial health risks. An on top of that, fucking vaccinate them.

Dont let them free roam. At all.

I grew up on a farm with free-roaming barn cats. Do you know how many times child-me cried over having to bury them? Illness, disease, pregnancy, vehicles, other territorial cats, ticks, fleas, litter, poisoned prey, malicious humans, local wildlife, predatory birds, scrap metal, extreme heat, freezing temperatures, tainted water sources, poisonous or venomous critters, getting stuck in small or high places, tapeworms, loose nails, old equipment, falling branches...

I've seen some truly body-horror slasher-movie shit- just truly nauseating visual fuckery- and I'm telling you not to let your cat free-roam.

Leash training isn't hard. Supervised walks aren't hard. Even keeping your cat physically fit and entertained indoors isn't an impossible feat. Don't let your fucking cat fucking free-roam. Fuck

Also read up on foods and plants cats can't do, like every houseplant in existence is toxic it's insane

Anyhow yeah that's like. A couple things I guess

Here, have an Ollie Pic

[sh1-n0bu]

hehehehheheheee pretty birb bf

winged bf who pick you up into their arms, gently cradling you as if you were made of glass and the finest jewelry as they tell you to “hang on” before unfurling their wings and taking off into the sky

winged bf who show you the beauty of flying, holding you securely in his arms as you take in the way how the world below you looks so small and beautiful. who only has a gentle smile on their faces as you point out the big apartments and parks where you go to for a picnic date. who only has eyes on you as you admire the twinkling lights of the world under you

winged bf who wrap their wing around you whenever you shiver, even if it was one of those annoying sudden ghost bump things you get out of the blue. he’s still worried, let him worry for you in peace😠

winged bf who plucks a feather out of their wing, gently tucking the soft feather into your hair, or on your jacket — wherever you want. he wants you to carry a piece of him to remind you by even though you regularly steal his clothes

winged bf who allows you to be only person to touch his wings, to care for them, to brush them, to just… well, touch them to your heart’s content really. he doesn’t care if you put the tip of his long feather ends over your lips, mimicking a mustache, he doesn’t care if you want to use it as a blanket, he doesn’t care if you wanna use the ends like a cat toy in front of his face. he’ll indulge in your silly shenanigans

winged bf who sheds at least once a year, filling your shared home with the old feathers. who is either smug about it or is apologetic as he helps you broom the excessive fallen feathers. at this point you could probably make a plushie or some sort of art project from the amount of feathers that he shed. to which he objects, saying these are all old and weakened feathers, offering his wing for you to pluck feathers from if you really wanna make an art project

winged bf who hides the two of you under his wing when cuddling in bed, the added layer of his own extra limb making the scene feel more intimate than it is. as if the entire world is blocked out, just a meager existence passing by as you two enjoy this moment of comfort as his wing becomes a curtain to give you two privacy

winged bf who sometimes gets too sexually frustrated and pent up with your curious hands constantly touching the place where his wing is connected to his back, the skin and muscles there are sensitive, making him jump in his seat whenever you do it to tease him

winged bf who knows that it isn’t your fault. you probably don’t know, you don’t have a wing after all, so you don’t know what it means when someone touches your wing. who only calms your worries with a forehead kiss, usually handling his problems himself

winged bf who lets out a whine into his hand, muffling the embarrassing noise as your hand wraps tighter around his cock. he was way too sensitive than usual and it was all because of your wandering hand on his wings. he probably should have explained it all to you but right now, he found his words escaping him, mind melting into a muddled mess as he finds his hands clawing at your own in desperation

winged bf who mumbles out a weak protest of being “s-sensitive! aaah… f-feels too sen—♡︎ sensitive! y-your haaandd♡︎” as his legs start to shake, staring through teary eyes as you coax out yet another climax out of him. his tip an angry cherry red from the continued torture of your hand, his slit weeping precum over and over again despite having just came, getting hard in your hand embarrassingly fast

winged bf who gets tortured by your loving hands for who knows how many times. his eyes are getting blurry and breathing started to hurt. even more, his dick was stinging, twitching every time your tight fist comes up to the tip, letting go briefly as if to taunt him, touching the dripping slit with the tip of your finger and making him whine loudly before fucking his cock into your hand again and again. this was just pure torture, he wanted to escape and run away but you were whispering such nice words to his ears. calling him your good boy, your angel, how you loved being with your beloved like this… could he really ever refuse you?

winged bf who gets more and more twitchy in your gentle hold as your hand picks up speed, the filthy wet noise of his earlier cum being used as a lube filling the room alongside his loud moans. who begs for you to not to touch his wing as it flutters around, dropping a feather or two onto the floor due to moving around so much. who only lets out a pathetic whimper of a “cuz’ ahh haamgh—! [n-name], please! please don’t—♡︎ d-don’t touch them...? they’re sensitive too aanh haagh mfgh♥︎!!” when you ask him why

winged bf who felt like his skin was on fire. everything felt too much but felt too little at the same time, his cock painfully hard again in your hold the moment you ran the tip of your finger over the bane of it. his muscles were getting tense, a strange sense of feeling coiling around in his stomach as you kiss the place where his wing and back connects, shifting around frantically with a chirp or a preen falling from his swollen lips

winged bf who weakly paws at your hand around his dick, wanting to push it away but chasing right after it with his hips as the strange feeling in his stomach just continues to grow worse. it didn’t felt like his usual orgasm, the way he would just fall apart in your hands. it felt more intense and that scared him. who cries out through loud whines and bitten back sobs that “f-feels weird!! aanhh haah [n-name]—! it mnggh♡︎ feels weird! my c-cock feels unnck haah ahh amhh weird♥︎♥︎!!”

winged bf who throws his head back into your shoulder, hands covering his beet red face as a scream tears through his lips, muscles tightening, body going taut in your arms when you gently bit into the base of his wing, your other hand keeping his wing in place so it wouldn’t flutter and knock you away as he fucking squirts into his stomach, painting his muscles and your hand white. who lets out soft chirps and noises, legs twitching and hands struggle to decide whether to hold onto you or to muffle his embarrassing noises

winged bf who only lets out weak noises and chirps when you try to communicate with him, asking him if he was doing alright and if your angel was with you right now after that overstimulating experience. who immediately hides within his wings the moment a sliver of sobriety hits him, too humiliated to even look you in the face because what was that? and why did he felt… so good?

winged bf who gives you a weak glare that you know isn’t exactly serious, pouting at you and complaining about how you messed up his mind and stuff. who lean into your touch as you push his hair away from him, getting to see the still reddened face and the few tear stains on his cheeks. who grumbles about how you have too much power over him when you chuckle, leaning in to plant a kiss to his pouting lips. who chase after you with a demand for a proper kiss this time

⇨ sephiroth, genesis, angeal, hawks, xiao, venti, angel devil, vash, knives, sunday, simeon, raphael + anyone you can think of!

[captain--glitch]

I'm just replying with my actual reasoning because anon seemed genuine in their question (I don't really mind if people disagree or skip reading, I'm just a player from the bunch)

The abridged answer? It's a choice, casual mode doesn't give me a choice, classic does and I like having the choice even if to some people it looks like a shitty one (I don't think it is).

Resetting is a genuine tool to consider in the strategy, I would argue even the devs know this. If they didn't then why do you have a button combo for quick reset in the 3ds games? Why do the newer games offer an option to restart the whole map?

It's also about the choice of who really dies and who gets another chance... something you don't get in casual where everyone lives always.

And sometimes the RNG is just shit from the begining and reseting the whole map is easier and more convenient, even in casual mode, like, once I missed several 80% hits, my powerful weapon got wasted on a counterattack with a puny enemy, and got someone killed by a crit, and like, sure I could brave it but why should I? If the option to reset is there why should ya refuse to use it if it feels like the more convenient choice? (But in the end it's a choice, if I decide I don't really care I can carry on regardless and if I win it kinda feels rewarding, like against the odds I made it!)

In a game where resources are limited it's a valid strategy to just start over to make a better use of the resources the second time around

Why not simply play casual instead?

As someone who started playing way before casual was a thing, playing casual feels like a different game, there's no real stakes, no pressure, if I fuck up there's a safety net and I get my characters back at the end of the chapter, but, me personally, I don't like that, I like the stakes, I like the feeling that every one of my choices matter, if I fuck up it can be the difference between one character dying or surviving, even if I'll end up reseting for a death, that just gives weight to my strategy and playstyle, because if I'm careless I'm still losing something, I'm losing time on a failed attempt or I'm losing a character if I decided I don't like the other option better, instead of playing casual mode and forgetting completely about the consequences of being careless with my strategy. (As a side note, I wouldn't call time used on a failed attempt wasted, because you're still playing the game and you're learning what stategy works and what doesn't and you're becoming better, and I wouldn't call that a waste, but that's me, maybe for others it's a waste if you don't clear the map).

Like I really feel like the added weight of choice between resetting or not is part of the game, I can lose the time I invested on the map to get back my character or I can decide to carry on without them and proceed to see if the game has dialogue options about how sad their dead was.

And in the end it's not like there are bragging rights for iron manning a game on your own free time... so like not real shame in resetting on classic (just like isn't any shame for playing the game on casual either if you're a streamer your audience might shame ya for both, but that's another thing entirely hahaha)

Why not commit to the iron man?

The game is carefully engineered (?) to make you fall in love with the characters, the little guys are so much fun and it's just impossible to not end up getting attached to some of them, even with the ones that have little to no personality. Countless times I've told myself, "This is the time I'll play the true iron man, no resetting". And like, I make it through some chapters, maybe even commit to carry on with some deaths but then a character dies and I find out I had gotten really fond of that particularly useless archer and now I don't wanna carry on if he's not on the team (I'm looking at Ryan New Mystery of the Emblem, I did not expect to grow that attached to Gordin II, but I did and I do not regret resets to save him).

And that for me just makes the game more fun, I know for a fact that if I had played New Mystery in casual, I would have never realized how fun it was to use Ryan, I only realized that because I was faced with the choice of leaving him behind or risk everything to have him back, and I chose reset and did not regret it (he became one of my bestest strongest units). It's just fun to have stakes, and it's fun to have a choice, I just feel like casual completely strips that choice from me.

If you find fun in not having to think about character deaths that's your playstyle and I respect it, but it's not the way I choose to play.

Also this, yeah:

people who play on classic mode (specifically in games where casual mode is an option you can pick) but still reset when a character dies are the goofiest people ever (/lighthearted)

i’m a shameless casual enjoyer because i like having all the characters by the end (sorry kaga). so i understand that, when people are playing the older games where permadeath was always on, they might feel compelled to reset for a similar reason or to at least keep their faves. that’s valid

but like in the modern games where you have the option to keep everyone no matter what happens, yet still pass it up to play on classic mode and still reset every time someone dies,, idk it feels like casual mode with extra steps and more wasted time >.< maybe i am missing something in the equation but i’ve observed it among a few people and didn’t quite get it

basically if you choose to play on classic mode commit to the bit 🫵

.

[zosan-secondchances]

The Pirate King of the North

Main Themes: Villain Sanji, Alternate Universe, Zosan Ship

AU where Straw Hat Pirates meet old Sanji from a reality where Reiju didn't have emotions.

Warning: Long post ahead and some One Piece spoilers. Contains strong language.

Part 2

Young Zoro hates the fucker but those scars and piercings are doing a number to his soul.

Old Sanji's story goes like this:

He didn't experience compassion from anyone else aside from his mother, who--you know what happened.

Judge kept him locked away until he was 13. He had him released when he was deemed too broken to do anything, and he was apparently a waste of space. As far as the world was concerned, he was already dead. He gets left behind at some random pirate town in the North.

His swirly brows were recognized by the pirates who took him in--only for him to be enslaved because people would pay a lot to have their way with royalty.

He picked up some skills from the other slaves and became cunning af--because he had to be.

At 17 he started a revolt against the slaver pirates, effectively taking over as their new pirate captain.

He became the feared "Mr. Prince" and his words are as sharp as his bite.

He's underweight because he doesn't give two shits about good food.

"The All Blue? It's nothing but an old fishwive's tale," he says.

He used his cunning mind and new pirate crew to hunt down and kill his own father from the shadows.

He enslaved his own siblings and becomes the new ruler of Germa Kingdom. Over the years, he used them for warfare and expanded the territory of the North.

His heart is a bottomless pit for power and control.

He had a fling or two or several with is closely allied with Doflamingo because god damn they're both mad like that. The alliance eventually lead to direct connections with Celestial Dragons.

Sanji gains more power and becomes the notorious "Pirate King of the North"

Meanwhile at the other side of the world, Luffy didn't make it as far as he could have without a good cook.

Luffy would have recruited one from Baratie but the restaurant was absolutely destroyed before the smaller Straw Hat crew could make a difference. Some of the staff didn't make it.

Zoro left the crew when it fell apart at some point.

Due to Zoro's reputation and bounty that he had occurred during his limited time with Luffy, he was offered a position as a Warlord, ultimately taking over the late Jinbe's old role. He accepted and served for several years before he was assigned a job that he didn't know would be the most challenging one yet.

The Celestial Dragons didn't like the fact that Sanji had started to have more worldly control over their own, so Zoro was quietly assigned to hunt down the great Pirate King of the North. Zoro accepted because he felt that he needed more experience before he could take on Mihawk again.

Zoro quickly realised that this mission is not a walk in the park.

Sanji loves toying with the Demon Warlord so he insists on taking him on by himself.

It becomes an endless game of cat and mouse. Sometimes Sanji chases and sometimes he runs, sometimes he wins and sometimes he loses.

They're at each others' throats everywhere in the world. Any person, city or being of any kind that gets in the way usually gets torn apart in the chaos. The hunt goes on for a lifetime. They're currently in their 50's.

Zoro severs Sanji's left arm during one huge fight.

Because of this, Sanji relentlessly tries to get Zoro to marry him to use him in so many ways he can think of--both as an asset and under the sheets--oh the things that he wants the swordsman to do and beg for.

Sanji likes to refer to the tiniest scar on his lip as "Zoro's love bite"

He was about to get a nice fresh one on his chest when some fuckers teleported him away.

Hearing old Sanji's backstory was a bit much. It was young Zoro's turn to have a nosebleed that day.

----------

Oh yes I had fun drawing old silver fox, damaged Sanji. I wish I have the time to colour it up. I've also been very much into reading AU stories, especially soul brand ones. Keep them coming, you beautiful people.

Edit: Woo! I finally decided to make my own AO3 account. It's about time. Link here for the story: https://archiveofourown.org/works/60686077