#or I'll forget about it and move on
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zwiebelii · 1 year ago
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I have been infected with astarion disease
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eggdrawsthings · 8 months ago
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having the mando feels again how r we doing today chat 🫠
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pinkieriver · 1 month ago
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showtime’s sketches 🦷🃏
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IM SO OBSSESED W THEM HELP ME
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xitsensunmoon · 2 months ago
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Have you ever thought about how forgetting something can be a blessing?
You, as a human, maybe wouldn't agree on that. But every time they observed you, listened to you talk about something that was tugging at your mind for weeks... And then — poof. You didn't care anymore. Something that they couldn't afford, most of the time because they remembered how bad it actually was.
Humans call it "moving on". The brain just forgets the details, washes away the negative memories. It leaves a trace, a sinking, heavy feeling in your stomach when you thought about that situation when it was mentioned. But mostly, you didn't hold the needed information anymore to care.
Often times that not, they felt jealous of such ability. Memories are their most prized possession! If anything, their only possession. But they had seen things they wanted to forget. They knew things they didn't want to know. Oh, if only they were able to click that 'delete' button in their head.
Why did no one tell them you didn't choose which things to forget?
It was quite normal for children to be a bit forgetful. It's not something that phased them.
But you're not a child. You've been an adult for so long. Why do you look at them with such... Unfamiliarity? After so many years of knowing each other. Decades! You're supposed to have tons of memories with them! Did you not cherish those memories? Did you delete them on purpose? What did they do wrong for you to even think of doing that?
How could you forget their names?
Should they ask to delete yours?
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sysig · 4 months ago
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Maybe something with Mousey being jealous of Hunter and Smoker for one reason or another? hehe
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Day 7 - There might be a reason for that
Bonus:
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#My art#Requestober#RespectAWoman#Hunter#Smoker#Mousey#Always love when my bonuses are just as if not more technically complex than the main lol#I mean I say that but it was more just tedious to move things between EPSAI2 and GIMP lol#Chibi heads bopping around and a bust-up are not as intensive! My poor hand haha ♪#So this is my first time drawing the ladies digitally huh?? Or at least this trio anyhow haha I'll draw the other two someday#Considering Mousey is my favourite of all of them and her dynamic with Charger was one of my driving loves <3#I also realized while drawing this that she (as a survivor) and Max have the same outfit so that's ♥#White button down and khakis are fairly standard I know let me live XO I love them!!!#Went with pre-infected here tho ♪ When Mousey's still focused on Smoker! Hehe yaay#She's so cute <3 Love that wonderful disaster <3 <3 And also the mains as well!!! Lol#They were actually a lot of fun to draw digitally haha ♪ Hair touching - kind of all over touching lol Hunter's just Like That#I did kinda forget about Hunter's camo pants so I leaned on my SAI textures - but I did the shines on her duct tape myself! Pleased :)#I was thinking at first of Hunter offering Smoker a soda but she pushes for Smoker to be healthy huh!#So I was thinking maybe a weird-flavoured sports drink or sugar-free lemonade or something lol#And the usual ribbing lol Mousey do you know what you're wishing for ♫#I had a moment while drafting where I was like ''Where was the one of Smoker playing Tetris?? :0''#I 100% completely totally remembered it in full colour - but no that was just my brain filling in the details lol it was a sketched comic!#Whenever I think of RespectAWoman that's just the style I see in my head so my mind's eye took it from there pft#I found it in the end ♥ Had to make reference to it! As it's one of my favourites :D
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ratcandy · 7 months ago
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collection of moth things i never posted all of varying quality and age
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deoidesign · 8 months ago
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Just a reminder, I have a patreon!!!
I've been working on actually making stuff to post more often for the lower tiers, and have been consistently doing so!
I post at least a few sketches and drawings every month for the $1 and up patrons
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and I've been working on episodes and sharing some updates with my $5 and up patrons
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And I have a merch club for $15 a month, but there's still some $10 slots left! I design and send usually a postcard and some stickers to my patrons every month, but sometimes I'll do some experimental stuff; last month I did foil prints, for instance, and a few months before I made magnets!
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It also gets you access to private channels in my discord server, where I ask for patron input on things like the merch or drawings, and where I sometimes stream while working :)
Buuuut also, even if you don't want any of this stuff, it's a great way to support me directly if you like my work! I'm still on hiatus so I'm not making any money from work at the moment, but I'm working hard and my patreon enables me at least to buy my groceries!
Here's the link one more time, no pressure of course but I need to promote my patreon more so people actually know it exists haha
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swagging-back-to · 8 months ago
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bro this is *literally* why i do not fucking talk about it.
this is the exact response ive gotteen half the time I've told people about it irl.
the other half? people who self diagnosed themselves with DID and who harrassed me for weeks saying i was the one faking.
in short; i was completely correct. people literally cannot be normal about dissociation disorders and I'm done trying to be open about it :)
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moe-broey · 8 months ago
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Adjacent topic, but. One of my favorite things actually is when Alfonse pulls the player aside and is like "Let me think out loud real quick." and when the situation calls for it, "Also what do you think?" Like obviously this happens so much across any game ever, especially ones that have a designated partner character. But it feels so special to me...
Especially with Alfonse, especially when he calls the summoner by name. He didn't used to do that!! In the very beginning!!! And he slips up, as Lif. Trying So hard to take it back. It just feels so personal... 🥲🥺
#i have no greater point here i just like it a lot.#like to me i feel like he has that deep unique bond that the pmd2 partner has w the player#again could just be. two games w a designated partner character. but to me personally how i feel.#like i feel like it's comparable actually esp the way your partner pokemon will pull you aside too#making a point to include you. and also will just talk at you extensively LMFAOO but it's okay 😊💖#but also it just feels SO special and so personal and so rewarding from alfonse in particular.#like this guy did Not want that. he was so scared of that. he's also just one big loss away from feeling like he's lost it all.#one thing about me is that i don't agree. w how he feels about losing friends. i think it's okay. i think it's for the best.#i'm not lonely and sometimes it's a relief. knowing i'll never have to see that person again.#even when there's no hard feelings. even when i geniunely liked that person and they liked me well enough.#i just tell myself it's for the best. they'll move on without me. i'll cherish the memory. i hope they forget me.#but even as i say that it's like. i don't know how true it holds. but i do know it's fine to leave actually.#and i do know i'm not lonely. i've made peace w it a long time ago. i'm content by myself. i keep myself occupied.#meanwhile. i am always obsessing over what alfonse says and what he feels and i feel a DEEP. DEEP SEATED NEED.#to pelt him w rocks. FUCK YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU 😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤#this is why moe exists. the vessel. to pelt him w rocks.#fe alfonse
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selamat-linting · 3 months ago
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resignation letter is the most potent painkiller. i love you resignation letter i love you one month notice <3
#tmi but im regular again and literally the only change is because i've been eating enough to shit daily#i was in such a bad headspace these past few months that i could barely bring myself to eat#i'd go to sleep with my work uniform still on and wake up willing myself to get up for 30 mins and then brushing my teeth and going to work#with the same clothes i slept in#i stopped hanging out with my friends. i had nightmares abt my job.#i can only take care of myself on my days' off and i cant grok anything other than shallow entertainment like wrestling#everything else is too much for my brain to handle. i'd simply forget everything i read or play or even listen to#those three months are miserable lmao#its not just my job... its also the family issues i've been dealing with#yknow remember when i said i could have died? yeah that shit was real. fuckin love it when my mom admit my dad have the capacity to be a#family annihilator. but... since my dad have a job to keep him busy and we moved to a house where me and my sister and#my mom and dad get to have our own rooms... and my dad get to live near his old friends and family...#things have been getting better. usually we had a physical fight every two months but it hasnt happened yet and i seem to get on with him#better now. so... i guess im gonna be okay. i've been so tired and trapped#stuck between two places that are both physically and emotionally draining with no reprieve#things are changing. and i find that to be comforting despite how up in the air the future might be. i might be screwed but also? what if#i'll be fine? im at a point where im accepting any drastic changes even if its for the worse#funny how i used to like my job a lot. i guess im not to be comfortable with anything long term#posts about my life
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lieutenantselnia · 1 year ago
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Recently I've been thinking about self-shipping more actively with General Grievous/Qymaen jai Sheelal - he's been on my secondary f/o list anyway but I've found myself thinking more about him again in the past weeks. I just have no idea what kind of self-insert or oc to make for shipping with him😅
I originally fell for this guy the first time when I was about 13, without knowing what self-shipping even was, but my taste in this type of fictional characters was apparently already set back then (even if it took me a couple more years to admit it). In the Legends timeline my poor coughing cyborg boy actually has a pretty sad backstory, he could need some love I think <3
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wereh0gz · 9 months ago
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It's oc posting time
Rue has vivid revenge fantasies. Extremely violent ones about the many ways they'd kill Nox if they ever got their paws on him. Crushing his exoskeleton under their bare paws, tearing him apart limb for limb, ripping his guts out and eating his heart while he's still alive- you name it, they've probably thought about it
These thoughts *terrify* her. It proves what Nox has always told her right, that she is a hopeless, violent, uncontrollable *monster*. That the reason she became a beast in the first place is because she is truly evil at heart, just like him
(In actuality, it's just a symptom of their PTSD, but going to therapy and actually unpacking all of that isn't an option to them. They'd rather die than actually talk abt their struggles)
So the thoughts fester in her mind for years. She thinks about it daily. It becomes like an obsession. An impulse. A need. And she begins to think that the only way to free herself from that torment is to do it. To kill him. Even if it proves Nox right
Even if it proves *her* right
So they hunt him down, trying to kill him every time they encounter each other. And every time, Nox gets away, and he taunts them. And the thoughts, the want, the *hunger* for vengeance grows stronger
The cycle continues. The thoughts never cease. She never finds peace
(At least, she *thinks* she will never find peace, but she does. Eventually. After Nox dies from his own hubris lol)
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allisonreader · 10 months ago
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I don't know how to express what I want to at the moment...
At least not how to start off. How I truly want is to say something like "shoot me now" or "kill me now". Neither of which is what I really mean. Though curling up in a dark hole and crying sounds good about now.
I'm just being overly sensitive and distressed about having received two comments on old stories that I recently cross posted to AO3 that essentially accuse me of using ChatGPT or whatever it is to write them. Since I've seen them, I've been dwelling on them. Which feels so ridiculous, but I am. I don't know if I should have, but I responded to both explaining that the one thing was written like 10 years ago and the other probably about 20 when I was a literal child.
I still might go in a delete the comments on them.
Times like these are when I wonder if I have the right mentality to ever try to get anything professionally published one day.
It definitely makes me not want to post the couple of stories I was uncertain about posting already.
And it's not like the comments are completely unwarranted. The stories are definitely not well written, because they're OLD and I didn't want to rewrite them.
And now I'm kind of regretting posting them at all.
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star-bastard · 14 days ago
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This cowardly shit is exhausting how do i train my brain to stop giving a fuck so i cam live in fucking peace
#ummmmmmmmmm vent in tags but I'm exhausted and high idc hiiiii whoever is reading this before i delete in the morning#idk where to fucking start like i am very lucky to be able to be as androgynous as i am and still be in the closet#and I've been joking with friends about ✨️✨️✨️ teehee i can finally feel the frontal lobe developing ✨️✨️✨️ because i know i am kinda uhhhhh#stunted i guess because fucky brain shit#but man#I can feel that shit developing!!!!! and i am outgrowing this fucking closet!!!!!#But i am a coward all the coworkers i have come out to happened cause i was drunk or high and its great that i did it and it didnt blow up#in my face but man#mannnnnn#I wanna get top surgery this year no ifs ands or buts i want it to happen more then i want to drive or even move out#why did i just spiral for so long while looking for consultations i am 23 fucking years old why cant i just!!!!!! function!!!!#yadda yadda dont be ashamed of keeping yourself safe yadda yadda we are living in interesting time and i knowwww that but aaaaaggghhhhhhh#I cant even drive for more then 5 fucking minutes before i spiral into a panic attack i can barely make phone calls what the fuck is this#WHY am i getting better in some areas but not others i am 23 I'm an adult i am finally starting to FEEL like an adult#this shit isnt even the Ooohhhhhh I still feel like a✨️✨️ cringy weird kid teenager ✨️✨️ type of shit i am starting to feel like a genuine#adult!!! i have been doing my taxes for years now i am paying bills i just#ugh#UGGGHHHHHHHHHH#i can hear my therapist telling my off already for forgetting i am Mentally Ill and Limitations and all the other shit we've been talking#about but Beth pls I just want my brain to get over it 🙄🙄🙄#i once got told i have been in survival mode all my life and the paralyzing and spiral fear i experience whenever i try to grow and change#are just the side effects of that but cant i get over it#this closet is suffocating if i get rid of the breats I'll have more room to breathe and wiggle out#stupid blehhhhh#okay back to smoking my body hurts
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sysig · 1 month ago
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Don’t tell me what to do! (Do, do it, he likes it) (Patreon)
#Doodles#SCII#Damned#DAX#ZEX#Helix#Max Vyer#Dexter Favin#All four here for a change!#I keep forgetting ZEX's bruises agh why I love bruises#I don't know why it won't stick in my mind! Injury signifiers are some of the best agh#Drawing him on-model to earlier and less-abused times! No longer accurate! Will be again though hopefully maybe possibly lol#If he doesn't lose an eye in the meanwhile - he did manage to avoid getting haunted so there goes his arm scar!#All the more reason to Definitely Include his bruises in that case uou Trade one for the other! Sheesh sheesh#I'll get it one of these times lol#It's probably something to do with DAX not getting any facial bruises smh all covered by his clothes#Speaking of - more internal owies the lot lol#He really is so dramatic - ZEX didn't die when he took the medicine you'll be fine just a bit swimmy#And he got to hear ZEX being forceful and commanding he ought to be grateful (lol)#Still mad about it tho lol - he's doing So Much for the sake of the mission and protecting ZEX and now he's totally going to die for it!#Okay DAX lol#It really reminded me of Max getting sick and complaining that he'd die hehe - intentionally mirroring of their respective mismatches? :3c#Who knows ♪#He really was So offended that ZEX reprimanded him lol ♫ He's always playing the disinterested straight man! Don't call him on it! Haha#He's having a rough day Admiral headaches are no fun#I wonder how often VUX get eye-aches from staring at things for too long hmm straining their eyes as they can't move their necks really hmmm#All this extra mobility and for what! For Dexter's body to give him nicotine withdrawals! Haha those are so unrelated
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quietlyblooms · 1 month ago
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so i'm definitely going to work on that headcanon meme bc it's time to yap about chiyo, and after that i might start writing out chiyo's a.rcane verse? at least a rough outline if not a lil blurb to give a feel for the verse as i tend to do. i'm also gonna casually rewatch a.rcane to see which characters really jump out at me, but if anyone has a preference for who they'd like to see me write, pls let me know!! i'm gonna add anyone i decide to pick up to @tvrningout as test muses and go from there. so altogether!! i have three tasks i wanna work on tonight, and hopefully i can actually get them all done!
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