#opposite of vague posting
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Almost a year and it still hurts like day one.
Today is worse because my meds were changed. I know that. I know that this moment of intense sadness will fade and I will go on as I have these last 11 months. Getting up, going to work, simultaneously feeling like I'm making progress and barely holding it together.
But the ache never goes away. The loneliness, the sense of betrayal, the self-hatred, that never goes away.
The guilt never goes away.
One day I will be able to trust again. One day someone will say that they love me and they're here for me and they're always going to be by my side-- and I'll believe them.
Even people I've loved for years, no matter how many times they try to reassure me-- the deepest, smallest, weakest part of me still calls them liars.
I still can't be angry. I can't blame you for your decision. It was my fault. I will not paint you as the villain in what I thought was our fairytale love story.
But you have broken something. It's like you patched up a cracked piece of pottery only to leave it shattered.
It's odd. I don't want you to apologize. Grief and heartbreak are consequences I fully deserve.
But you still broke something. You hurt me. I deserved it, though I couldn't believe it. I was safe with you. I thought I was safe with you.
So I write this, fully aware that these feelings are more intense than they should be, fully aware that there is nothing that can be done to fix the past.
And yet I still write. I write when I have something to say but know that I could never get the right words to come out in the right order.
I write because I doubt I will ever speak to you again. You, meaning the person I remember, the person in the photographs, the person I fell in love with.
It's a small world. Our paths will probably cross again. But you will forever be a stranger to me.
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i'm in me smartcar broom broom
#chilaios#chilchuck tims#laios touden#dunmeshi#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#rob art#two vague pei references in here as tribute to the pei locals who saw my au posts. love all three (3) of u very much.#please ignore the steering wheel being on the opposite side i flipped the canvas at one point and forgot to flip it back ajgjgjsa#laichil
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Went to a college party last night and hated it (left after 20 mins) which was $15!! And I’m already over budget for this pay period so I’m rlly hoping I get money tomorrow or I will cry hehe
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Do y’all think that Sora is the one who first decides to not go with a similar outfit as the other ninja (Doc said it’s because she dislikes the conformity of all the same looking outfits) and then Arin goes along with that because he loves his best friend, but Sora will continue standing out as unique in a good way while Arin is just gonna be left out? M’just thinking about the way that Arin always looks up to people and copies them instead doing things his own way while Sora is exactly the opposite, and actually goes out of her way to do everything in her own kinda way.
#ninjago#lego ninjago#ninjago dragons rising#ninjago dr#ninjago sora#sora ninjago#ninjago arin#arin ninjago#talking abt the tournament outfits here btw#and vaguely evil arin it’s implied in there somewhere okay#best friends of opposites or smth like that#not only in terms of their parental relationships or how they fit in with the ninja#the dragon and oni imagery.#but also the more sutble things that define their characters are wholly different yet intertwined so deeply because they still care for#one another#idk maybe i’m just tripping it’s late too late#might’ve thunk too many thoughts for exactly 0.00003 seconds and put out an incomprehensible mess#cable stupids#cablysis#or smth like that#just. the way they perfectly reflect each other in so many ways than just one makes me go crazy sometimes#text post
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it is truly so boring that in a series that hits on racism and sexuality that when talking about racism and sexuality in the show and in the fanbase people act like you are making mountains out of mole hills
#yeah i actually am still thinking abt that armand shit show from the other day#because what pissed me off the most are people acting like its crazy to be like#''Hey! maybe you should think about why you think he is undesired and sexually inept when we shown and told the opposite''#we love talking abt how the writers trust the audience to have two braincells and then get offended when asked use them#and- that poc are not safe from upholding racist steeotypes like i rolled my eyes hard asf#actually because that one blogger that posted their response almost immediately after i dm'd them privately#made some vague post being like ''well we never saw them fuck so '' or sm shit idk#and i just had to accept there was no point in wasting my breath#but i also still wanna talk about it because it Is interesting and it Should be broken down in plain english#but dw ima be talking about iwtv and race/sexuality till the crows come home#char.txt
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prev post reminds me of my favouritest translation approach for when you can't choose between several interpretations either of a single word or a text as a whole which is just. translate it a whole bunch of times. you dont need one single perfect translation you can have like 70 that are all fucked up in different directions instead
#guy who has translated the same poem a normal number of times voice#on a more practical level when translating e-pistulae if i couldnt choose between two significant directions of a word i would just#translate it as two words. you can do whatever you like forever#this is only vaguely adjacent to what prev post was actually about but . actually why can't you write two papers that argue opposite things#and then just leave them there. for the bit. who caare#translation#beeps
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for the choose violence ask game: 3, 8, 16 :D
for the choose violence ask game!
3. screenshot or description of the worst take you've seen on tumblr
i was going to be kind enough to not screenshot but i lied i'm choosing violence. this is less of a take and more of an incorrect quote i suppose but. every time i remember it exists i stare at a wall for like 20 minutes.
most posts under the "chaotic tim drake"/"unhinged tim drake" tags do. get to me. they are all liable to make me spontaneously combust but something about this one. the way Tim's fanon kill count magically gets higher every time it's brought up. the way it directly contradicts Tim's internal deep-seated fears about turning into Bruce and that's why he has always planned to retire after being Robin the *entire point* of Tim Drake of Tomorrow is to show how horrified Tim is and how future!evil!Tim will always go too far. like i genuinely do not know what character ppl are talking about with the "Tim is most likely to become a supervillain and somehow this a cutesy headcanon" sort of thing. it plagues me. consider me plagued. i could go on and on about it for hours and how deeply it contradicts Tim's character to his core. also just why does the fandom want to make him a villain so bad? i don't understand.
8. common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about
i already gave one answer to this question here, but worry not i have endless answers to this one. a bit one for me is: the idea Cass should use ASL. it icks me out. i will close a fic if Cass is using ASL i will not lie. firstly, she does not canonically know ASL. secondly, it doesn't make *sense* for her to use it bc her disability has nothing to do with the ability to speak, it has to do with her language learning skills. and ASL is, *still a language*. and would be just as difficult to learn, if not more-so bc it could set back her learning of English and would not be as easily applicable as English to her daily life. it's a headcanon that ranges from well-meaning misunderstandings to just downright ableism that infantilizes Cass and infantilizes ASL. honestly i get touchy in general about fandom using ASL when not written by a Deaf writer/someone who knows ASL bc... you can tell. you can always tell. (hearing fans stop trying to come up with sign names for the Batfam i'm gently begging you.) there are many good posts breaking down why this headcanon doesn't really work but i'm just salty and feral about it.
16. you can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc)
the headcanon/fanon concept that Tim has lasting psychological trauma due to the Titans Tower incident, or that it has caused him to be afraid of Jason. (the same can be applied to Damian cutting Tim's line being something that Matters to Tim longterm or causes fear of Damian) like? beyond the "that is not canon, that event really didn't bother Tim and Tim was a cocky little shit the whole time", i'm unsure how this... fits into the fanon version of Tim? like i don't *understand* it. how it is that fandom likes "Tim has a super high kill count and is going to be a supervillain" but also... thinks one bad fight that roughed Tim up a bit has made him terrified of one person specifically? these feel contradictory. either he can Take The Heat or He Can't. this weird waffling where he's both the biggest badass around but also somehow a wilting traumatized kid confuses me. i don't necessarily mind the exploration of Tim being angry or pissed off about these events, or even him being more injured than he was in canon and dealing with that, but him being like. so afraid of Jason it influences their relationship has always eluded me. it contradicts everything else about fanon!Tim and makes him seem... sort of cowardly? like not that events like these can't be traumatizing but in his field of work they're not unique events. these are normal Tuesdays for him. why is it affecting him so much in fanon.
#necrotic answerings#ask game#the screenshotted post in question?#17k notes.#like. what.#(also why i didn't feel bad screenshooting it op will be okay if a couple ppl don't like it vs the masses.)#the cass using asl thing *really* irks me as a Deaf fan#it could be done well don't get me wrong#but it never is.#and now the idea of it turns me off#and i don't like it from hearing fans at all. y'all have lost the rights to it /lh#ASL is not some cute cureall. nor is it just vague hand gesturing#it is a language. her disbaility surrounds language learning. not speaking#furthermore#cass speaking is what GIVES her agency!!#her voice gives her power and control over her trauma!!!#it's Important to let her speak!!#silencing her with headcanons is weird#and ASL is not always practical for vigilantes. in fact it tends to be the opposite of practical.#i just dislike it deeply.#will i amek all of these about fanon tim drake? idk maybe.#i got a lot of opinions.
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A conversation I have in my head pretty frequently
*thinking about someone*
*a separate part of me, also thinking about her* mine
Wow nonono not ours
*forcefully* Mine.
No listen sh
MINE.
No shut up for a second Madeline sh
*growled with teeth bare* MINE!
Shut. Up. She's not ours, we don't own her, we never will
*dripping with venom and malice* m i n e
I know hun, I see it, it hurts me too seeing people treat her that way, but we still can't just claim ownership of her
*deep despair* mine?
No Madeline, not ours. But we own our own little thing remember? Don't you love owning them?
*infinite happiness* Miiiiiine
Ours
...
...
*with a vague feeling somehow conveying she's talking about everyone in the world* Mine?
Yeah still no hun, we probably won't ever be god and get to own everyone in the world, no matter how much better we could make it, no matter how much pain it causes us
*whimpered almost silently* mine
How about we spend the next few hours building an elaborate fantasy in which we kidnap her and then she is ours, does that sound good?
*enthusiastically* MINE!
Alright hun let's get to work
#dear void#this is the opposite of vague posting because its about all of my mutuals#actually forget i said that#im very normal about you#i dont wver think about picking you up like an interesting stone on rhe beach and putting you on my shelf to keep
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Two very horny mech one openly (ko) one very repressed (ss) then their is Breakdown the only other Big sexy man with dumb himbo but good hearted (to those he loves) energy. And Skyfire giant marshmallow man with body of a giant and soul of a scholar and said.
Like that Simpson meme of Smithers (replace with a flustered Skyfire) with the two strippers (Starscream & Knockout) dancing on him. Pan out and you see Breakdown like some guard stopping others from stopping the seduction of the large shuttle by his two smaller boyfriends. And when they succeed he joins in.
Obvosly other dynamics can be made like that one post you had up were KOBD tell star scream he fumbled the shuttle but they won’t but the potential of other stuff is there.
Oooo okay interesting interesting
I can see fun dynamics between Breakdown and Skyfire
ALSO GOD THE CUDDLING I'M IMAGINING
#suggestive#lightly so#transformers#maccadam#kobd#koss#skystar#skybreak#knocksky#breakstar#Knockout#breakdown#Starscream#skyfire#oh god imagine kossbd going full ''he said no pickles'' for skyfire#oh no! the autobot has been seduced to the dark side! whatever shall we do /j#...though. imagine if it's the opposite though— imagine if it's Starscream_ Knockout_ and Breakdown getting swayed to the autobot side#or!!!! this is a continuity vague/blend post war situation!!
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writing patterns
rules: list the first line of your last 10 (or however many you have) posted fics and see if there's a pattern!
thank you for the tag @imdamagecontrol <333
Borrow My Name
James pulls the door to his flat shut and takes the three steps to the opposite side of the staircase with purpose.
2. If you ask nicely
Now the thing is – James is great at flirting.
3. if this be done
James Potter lives in a beautiful cottage in the middle of a green forest with red shutters on all his windows and yellow flowers of every variety one can think of in his garden.
4. Something That Tastes Almost Divine
Yes, they were best friends.
5. Operation Walburga's Arbitrary No Kissing Ever Rule
The first thing James sees when he comes back home after his Quidditch training is Sirius lying on his bed, which in and of itself is not an unusual thing at all, seeing as Sirius has spent the better part of every single summer holiday so far at Potter Manor.
6. blindspot
James wakes up far too late, which he only realises because of the huge alarm clock next to Regulus’ bed glaring at him with its deep green digits.
7. Nature Assigns the Sun
Courfeyrac has always been happy.
8. Watch Me Meet My End
Dear Mr. Remus Lupin, As you know, the next Hogwarts year starts on 1 September.
9. On Lies And Spies
Peter hadn’t exactly been thrilled when Dumbledore had asked him to be his spy, but he had felt honoured and important for once and that was enough for him to agree.
10. All My Theory Complete
Regulus Black felt emotions in secret.
no pressure tagging @iceprinceofbelair @jmeslovr @messrsage @messymoony
#guess my common factor is the very opposite of nics which is to say i have really fuckin long first sentences#hp#tagged#oop just edited it to actually have it in the order i posted them to ao3 cause it was in the updating order before#which feels vaguely wrong#since its not representative of my first sentence evolution#(altho technically of these fics the courfeyrac one is the olderst)
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ok so. i don’t know when i’ll post again. so to hold y’all over i’m showing sketches that i never posted
it’s not much and i don’t expect this to take off but i just want it out there
JUST A HEADS UP some of these are old and u can tell by how weirdly drawn it is some were done when i was still trying to get the hang of drawing them
alright putting context for each of the doodles in order under the cut!!!
1 - drew big dimple for class. basically my teacher gave us prompts and we could pic any one and go ham with it and do whatever we want!! i chose anatomy cuz if u think about it dimple’s rlly huge n buff soooooo that counts as anatomy
2 - doodle from october i don’t remember posting about?? if i have then pretend this is the first time you’re seeing it
3 and 4 - had an INCREDIBLY self indulgent idea where reigen teaches dimple to dance!!! i don’t know why dimple would want to but i just want an excuse to imagine them dancing together okay 😭😭😭 i don’t think reigen is excellent at dancing but decent enough to teach and i just WANT THEM to start off sloppy with their dances but over time with these lessons they get more in sync and one night in the office they do a slow dance and there’s a lot of romantic tension in the air dimple dips reigen and reigen pulls his face closer to his and their lips almost touch before reigen gently pushes him away red in the face murmuring how he’s getting better at this and dimple is ALSO red in the face (and this is pre-relationship too 💙💙💙💙)
5 - ekurei but they’re on a kiddie writing pad
6 - this one is also so self indulgent me and payton were listening to red flags by tom cardy one night and wanted to connect it to ekurei so BADLY and we had the idea dimple’s “red flag” is how he’s so obsessed with god and religion and wanting to become god
7 - doodle for @clownwry ‘s little au because it makes me SOB LOUDLY
#mob psycho#mob psycho 100#mp100#reigen arataka#mp100 ekubo#mp100 dimple#shigeo kageyama#ekurei#look#i may be cringe#but I am free#don’t look at me just don’t#idc I’m posting now I’m tired#it’s so funny some of these I thought to myself ‘I’m NEVER posting that’#and yet#here I am#doing the opposite of what I wanted to do#i feel like one day I’m gonna get vague posted because of my ekurei art#they’ll probably tease it or grill me for making it so out of character#i understand. but consider this;#I’m insane and unwell
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He’s from fucking Iowa why is he saying “bloody” in front of everything
#vagueing in lowercase#cause I know the opposite sometimes happens in reverse for British characters#but still it’s jarring and it keeps taking me out of the fic I’m reading#no fandom#I mean we all know what fandom it’s from let’s be real here#but I’m vagueing#cause I would never leads a comment like that on someone’s fic that would be so rude#so I gotta post it here
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so i'm working on politific, right - actually, i should explain that a bit
politific being the shorthand for my current big project, which is a political story (shock, that) taking place 80 years after the Lamb became the god of Death, when the Mystic Seller 'helpfully' dumps Narinder on their lap. you know. after he explicitly requested to be killed after he was defeated. So Lamb's dealing with their former god who keeps not behaving the way they expect him to, as well as the complex political landscape of trying to grow their religion (especially now that the former god is around, which is potentially a lot more destabilising than even the Bishops hanging around), and their own past finally catching up to them around two centuries after they died the first time
SO to the reason i mention all that, which is that as a political story, I need to keep track of all of the players - I like DMing games with a bunch of NPCs and social situations, so that's fine, I'm used to that part
but i have 5 pages of notes, front and back, just on the players in the first arc, and I am having some regrets
not enough to not be enthused about writing the fic, but they ARE there
#olrin rambles#text post#politific au#plus all of those worldbuilding thigns that were vague in CMT get to be fleshed out#since politific lamb didn't have the memory problems#they kind of have the opposite problem#but at least they still know their name this time around?#it's not in anyway directly linked to CMT to be clear#i just have standard worldbuilding that's true regardless of the AU i'm working on
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One funny thing to me is that sometimes my bestie will send me reels like this one
And I have to be like. Bestie I appreciate that you’re on my “side” ig but 1 I’m just having fun and 2 in no way did he treat me like his bf and our FIRST text conversation he was like “hey I don’t want you to get the wrong idea bc I don’t want a relationship”
#like. if anyone was “in the wrong or immature here it was for sure me#but I KNEW that going in that’s why I’m not upset or anything#I’m literally chilling and my friends are so mad for no reason#how do you say I’m literally not mad in a believable way. bc I’ve tried and they have NOT believed me#and then I’ll mention us hanging out off handedly and they’ll be like details now I’m like ok here’s the highlights they’re like wtf.#I’m like. I didn’t give you details for a reasonnnnnnnnnnnn#it’s not happening. it’s okay. it’s fine to be weird flirty friends. that’s fine.#also. I kinda. don’t agree with the original post anyway? like. the line between platonic and romantic is so vague like. doing stuff and#then realizing you might have been giving the wrong impression so you communicate what you want is not immature. it’s actually the opposite#so idk#my bestie has been in a relationship for a year and is like. anyone who’s not willing to commit rn is immature like. girl. I don’t even know#if I want to commit. so it’s literally so beyond okay.#the fact that we haven’t fucked yet is honestly? maturity I think. or maybe he just had the entire world convince he wants me and doesn’t#but I think what’s going on is he does like me but doesn’t want a relationship for mental heath reasons (he has kind of implied this im not#pulling this out of my ass) in which case. i do appreciate that he hasn’t tried to sleep with me (bc i would say yes and that would probably#me worse/harder to get over/ignore)#these tags are an essay Jesus. I’ve been drinking all day on the beach lmaooooooo#also it’s my birthdayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy#work guy -_-
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Usually on Tumblr's explore page, long posts get an automatic show more button after a certain length so it doesn't fill the whole screen. The ONLY two posts I've seen that somehow don't have that are 1) Dungeon Meshi bath scene gifset, and 2) Falin ripping off her shirt gifset
Tumblr said you WILL look at Falin's boobs
#alchemically posts#dungeon meshi#this is the opposite of a complaint btw#dungeon meshi spoilers#<- post is vague but just in case
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.
#anyway thinking about how my main inky and my rook are like. reverses of each other. like inky. born in an alienage. has very little memory#of it thanks to The Circumstances. got taken in by a dalish clan after all that shit and like. sees it as simultaneously a point of#pride and something that makes him worry about whether or not he's. you know. Enough. like he wants to belong and he mostly does but#damnit he does remember how they looked at him and Rella that first day and it's hard for him to not wonder in the back of his mind#if they still see him like that. and like he's got his whole Thing about that and it does make me think about how Sera would be A Lot to him#but then. my rook having basically the opposite thing going. the only memory of his clan being a vague image of his mother's face#to the point of him not even always being sure it was real (but what's the point of dwelling on that. right?) and him just deciding that#'well it's too late to think about that now' and how my Rook's whole personality for a while is just 'i don't know what's going on but#i want to help but i just end up hurting people or failing to avery disasters' while my inky is just 'i pretty much get what's#happening here and i want to kill everyone but APPARENTLY i have to be NICE now 🙄'#just rambling and thinking about how inquisition might turn out to be the end of his villain era#not that he doesn't kind of deserve a villain era but like. bro it's not helping#original posts
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