#ooooof got over with it

[when-jaguars-are-sick]

i got through half of this before i had to go to class today and let me just say that everything feels *wrong* when vin and luke are fighting 😭 Trying to manifest a reunion over here i need the boys back together

The Superbowl

For the first time in my life I have a shadow of an opinions about the Superbowl. Very weird sensation. Do not expect this to happen again, not gonna happen. - Anyway, group food poisoning + a loooot of drama.

Huge thank you to @lisupandowntown for cheerleading, but also for helping me sort the order of these fics!!

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"Do you have everything?" Bella asked, finishing up her hair, as Lucas walked inside of their new place carrying boxes of take out and shaking the snow off his coat. They had agreed there was no way they'd risk it cooking for Superbowl, after her history of fucking up the food.

"Yes!" Luke yelled so his voice travelled all the way to the living room, where she was using oil to unclamp her curls after drying them with the diffuser, "can you help me get everything out of the boxes? They'll be here soon."

He was right, just as they finished putting out the food and putting all the drinks in the fridge, the doorbell rang.

Bella could tell Luke was nervous, which was weird for someone who thrived so much in group settings as he did. Still, he was clearly jittery and his undiagnosed ADHD was acting up, seeing as she had watched him walk twice into the kitchen holding the remote control, in search of that same item.

His shoulders dropped in relief as the door opened to Leo and Jonah and Bella cringed as she figured Luke was probably nervous about seeing Vince again. It made her heart squeeze, that they were so close and in this odd position. They hadn't seen each other since that flu from hell Luke had caught in Doveport, a month before, and although they were talking, Bell had the distinct feeling something was very off. It felt like January took a year to end.

"Damn guys, the house is so nice," Leo didn't wait for them to show him around, openly snooping and pulling Jonah by the hand. Bella smiled, rolling her eyes. Wendy and Jon had both been there already, but Leo hadn't.

"I'll show you upstairs, c'mon," Luke walked ahead and Leo beamed, following him up, while Jonah hung back, shaking his head at the interaction.

"Are you hungry?" Bella looped her arm with Jonah's, "I didn't cook, so everything is edible, I promise."

He chuckled at that, pulling her closer as they returned to the kitchen to get drinks.

Vince and Wendy arrived almost as the game was about to start. The nervous atmosphere from before had melted off and they were all sprawled in the living room, drinking and waiting for the commercials to end when the doorbell rung.

"I'll get it," Bella assured Luke, as he perked up, "save me some dip!"

She finished off her beer, before opening the door and grinning, pulling Wendy into a tight embrace. Vince was standing right behind his girlfriend, holding a bottle of wine as a housewarming gift, and he pulled Bell into a hug, tipping his body back so her feet were off the ground.

"I haven't seen you in so long, Bell. I missed you," he squeezed her and Bella smiled at him, taking the bottle of wine and ushering the couple inside as the wind howled outside and snowflakes started to fall once more.

"They're all in the living room," she instructed, pointing the direction, "go ahead, I'll put the bottle away and be right there."

"Do you need help, beautiful?" Vince followed her into the kitchen, while Wendy went ahead and Bella sighed, figuring the weirdness she felt from Luke was mutual then.

"Nope," she put the wine in the wine rack that was sitting on top of her counter. It was far from the couple's preferred drink, so it sat there with only 4 more bottles, they were beer people, "how have you been? Wen mentioned the road trip from hell."

Vince let out a soft scoff, taking the beer she passed him, "exhausted, but happy," he said truthfully, "it's been a really long month."

"Tell me about it," Bella raised her eyebrows, filling up a glass of water for herself, figuring it was best to lay off the beer when it was still so early and her stomach was already starting to feel a little off, "how's Max, by the way? Did your dad give him too much shit?"

Vince perked up at that, all smiles, "nah, my dad is chill," he promised, "Max is fine, I think? Back to teaching and he got a hang of the crutches, so I'm not there as often."

She had the distinct feeling Vince was defending himself, so Bell shrugged, tugging on the front of her top, "I'm glad he's back in the classroom, he's a menace without anything to do."

Vince chuckled, nodding along, "the pot calling the kettle black," he teased, then turned his head slightly to the side, "you never told me why you had that day off work, Bell-"

"Hey man!" Luke's voice was bright, and cutting. A million bucks smile as he tugged Vince into a one armed hug, messing Vin's curls with one hand, "are you gonna hide in the kitchen all evening? The game's about to start!"

Bella opened an uneasy smile. Anyone else would read this as friendliness, but she knew Luke. That brilliant smile that showed his molars was a work smile, she had seen him use it on the mayor, his boss, random homeless people who got violent in the shelter. It was his version of customer service voice.

Vince clearly noticed too, because despite leaning into the hug, there was a wrinkle between his brows as he patted Luke's back and gestured for Bell to follow as they returned to the living room.

They had gotten a large terracotta twin set of couches, the larger one was facing the TV above the fireplace and the smaller one, to its left, was facing the ugly brown armchair that Luke had bought, the coffee table filled with snacks in front of them.

Wendy was sitting on the bigger couch with Jonah, who was happily chatting with her. Leo was sprawled on the smaller couch and eating away the mini churros they had bought as dessert, completely skipping the salty food options.

Vince moved to sit with him, as Luke passed Jonah the remote control and sat down on the armchair, pulling Bella to sit on his lap.

She rolled her eyes, knowing this entire layout wouldn't last even to the halftime concert. True to her prediction, not even 10 minutes into the game and Luke was standing, pacing, red in the face, and she had the armchair all for herself.

Vin was also up, clutching his beer and leaning over the couch's back, so he was behind Wendy, eyes glued to the television as he hurled insults at the players and slapped Luke's chest without even needing to look at him to figure where he was.

They were so ridiculously in synch when they weren't being absolute idiots, Bella thought with a fond smile, moving to grab another handful of tortillas and scooting the armchair closer to the coffee table, so she could scoop up the dip.

The plate had been refilled twice already, although Leo was yet to touch it, adamant on not leaving a single churro for the rest of them to eat. Luke had stopped eating as soon as the game started, far too busy pacing around like a caged tiger, hand tugging at the root of his hair.

Wendy looked bored, she was scrolling through her phone as the game went on, completely ignoring her boyfriend yelling at the screen over her head and Jonah huffing and cheering next to her.

Leo, still sprawled on the couch, was shouting just the same, causing Bella to snort at all their reactions. She would never understand football no matter how many games she had attended during college or the fact Luke watched it religiously, it was simply beyond her comprehension. At least it was fun to watch them go insane over it, though, and the cheerleaders' presentation during college too.

"That man is a fucking idiot," Luke was grumbling, pacing behind the couch and pointing at the screen, causing Jonah to nod in agreement and Leo to giggle.

"Jamarcus Russell of our generation," Leo needled and the boys all chuckled, making Bella frown as the reference completely passed her by.

Her stomach churned as she reached for the dip once again, the half bent position sending up a soundless burp that caused her to change her mind. She sat back, feeling a horrible burning inside and gulping down.

Bella sat back up, pressing a hand to her mouth and muffling another burp, grimacing as acid splashed the back of her throat. On the screen, one of the players was bulldozing through the field, only to be violently tackled, causing the guys to cheer and Luke and Vince to high five.

"FINALLY!" Lucas used his beer bottle to gesture at the screen, "DO SOMETHING!"

Bella got up and he looked away from the TV for a split second, opening an arm as if inviting her to cuddle up to him, but not really paying much attention.

Wendy looked up, frowning, "hey, are you alright?" she asked, noticing how pale Bell had turned and the ginger nodded.

"Yeah, just-" she raised her glass, "ran out of water, I'll be right back."

"Can you get me a beer?" Vince asked, glancing in her direction, "please?"

"Sure," Bella pressed her lips tightly together as her stomach let out a nasty growl, thankfully completely muffled by the TV volume. She quickly moved out of the room, thankful that the dining room separated the kitchen and living room and they couldn't see her.

It wasn't the worst nausea just yet, she felt queasy and stuffed, but not like she was about to be sick. So Bella grabbed Vin's beer in the fridge, then filled her glass back up with water and roamed through their medicine cabinet in search of pepto.

In the living room, she heard a collective groan and Jonah exclaiming, "HOW HARD CAN IT BE TO JUST USE YOUR FUCKING LINEBACKERS!?" followed by Luke swearing.

The bottle of pepto was at the very end, buried in the far back and Bella simply chugged the rest of the liquid down, before coughing at the taste. The coughing fit turned into a retch and she dropped the bottle, pressing the back of her hand to her lips and swallowing the gross liquid that flooded her mouth.

She shuddered, wiping her face and the sweat collecting on her upper lip. Bella threw away the bottle, then walked back to the living room with a sigh, feeling more than a little bothered by the party by now.

She wasn't feeling well and they weren't even at the halftime, there were at least two more hours to go and Bella wasn't feeling like the best host at the moment.

"Here," she poked Vince's rib to hand him the bottle and he turned to look at her with a bright smile, all the tension from before forgotten, only for his brows to meet.

"Wow, you're really pale, Bell," Vince used his shirt to open the bottle, "are you alright?"

"Yeah," Bella grimaced, "just a little queasy," she explained, but his eyes drifted to her hands instead.

"You're not drinking today?" Vince raised his eyebrows and she shook her head no, walking back to the armchair, not in a mood to entertain more questions.

As she sat down, Vin was still watching her. On the screen, a player got thrown over and they called for a quick time out to remove him from the field, which was enough of a pause for Vince to poke Luke and point at Bella.

"Hey," Lucas stepped closer, crouching down in front of her, "what's wrong? You're really pale..."

Everyone was listening in. Great.

Bella looked around uncomfortably, shaking her head at Luke, "I'm fine, really. Just queasy, don't worry about me. If I feel worse I'll let you know..." a burp rolled up, this time audible and she wrinkled her nose, "ugh, sorry."

"It's fine," Luke stroked her cheek, pushing a curl back, "are you sure you're okay?" there was a dangerous undertone to his voice, which caused Bella to freeze, that undercurrent of worry that went beyond what was at hand and was pissing her off.

"I'm fine," she repeated, strongly, lowering his hands from her face with a glare, "Lucas," his name was said in a warning tone and he nodded, pressing a kiss to her forehead and circling the armchair in order to pull her back against it and focus on the game.

Bella didn't miss everyone else quickly looking away, trying to pretend they hadn't been listening in. Everyone but Vince who was frowning even more now and only looked away as the game started back up.

It went on for twenty more minutes and by the time the game went into the halftime concert, Bella was feeling more than just a little queasy. She attempted to stand up, but her stomach cramped and Bella leaned forward, staring at the rug under her coffee table and take deep measured breaths-

"Are you going to be sick?" Jonah asked, causing her to look up. Bella squeezed her eyes shut for a half second, pushing down the nausea, just as on the screen Samuel Jackson appeared in the middle of the field. Wendy put down her phone for the first time all evening, perking up.

"I'm fine," Bella parroted and Vince let out a little snort, not believing her one bit, "I just ate too much."

"Yeah, ate too much," Vin teased, as he always did when she got pukey, "I'm way too young to be an uncle, Bell," clearly he meant that as a joke, and Jon even chuckled, but to Bella it felt like being slapped across the face. Queasiness forgotten, she just mouthed around nothing like a fish out of the water, only for Luke to react.

"Shut the fuck up, Vince," he said sharply, corroborated by Wendy slapping her boyfriend's stomach over the couch and glaring at him, as Luke circled the armchair to talk with Bella.

"C'mon, let's get you something for your stomach, baby-" he said, eyes scanning her face, clearly not wanting to bring up the matter in front of their friends, grabbing her arms and nudging her in the direction of the kitchen-

Wendy was staring at her, worried, and Vince's easy smile wavered and fell.

"Bell? Shit, I didn't mean to offend you, but uh- Are you-" He looked around, confused and Wendy glared at her own lap to avoid his eyes, interrupting his obvious question with a brisk whisper that Bella couldn't hear-

"I had a miscarriage," the words were out of her mouth before she could think them through, just spilling out, and Luke's eyes widened to the size of saucers, his hand on her arm rubbing up and down ceasing moving.

"Bell, what are you doing...?" He whispered, but she shook her head, squeezing his hand, taking it off her arm.

On the TV Kendrick was singing the repeating chorus of Squabble Up.

"Uhm- About three weeks ago," she explained to the group, wanting nothing more than to curl up and disappear, "so maybe chill with the pregnancy jokes," her last line was said directly at Vince, vicious after the previous jab, but she wasn't actually pissed at him. There was no way he could've known...

He shook his head vehemently, "shit, Bella, I had no idea, I'm so so sorry-" he said quickly, leaping around the couch to get to her, only to turn around with a frown, "three weeks ago- When you came to Doveport?" Vince asked Wendy, who had leaned forward, elbows on her knees and hand pressed to her face in a worried position.

Before Wen could answer, Leo asked in a really soft voice, almost drowned out by the stupid concert still playing, "Bella, how far along were you...?" his tone was pained and Bella quickly realized he had assumed the miscarriage was from the pregnancy scare that had happened four months before. She shook her head, but the blonde looked distraught at the thought, "I'm so sorry, you were so excited-"

"You knew!?" Jonah turned to his boyfriend, flabbergasted, and Bella looked at Luke, feeling panic making her skin crawl as the group started to talk over each other and Lucas made a confused face, eyes searching hers, misunderstanding Leo's words.

"I didn't-" she whispered to Lucas, suddenly desperate for him to not pay attention to Leo.

"Well, it was months ago, when they didn't say anything I just assumed she had gotten a negative-"

"Months!? What the fuck do you mean, months!?"

"No, she wasn't, it wasn't-" Luke tried to interrupt, only for Leo to groan, looking like he was going to be sick.

"Twice? Did it happen twice? Guys, fucking Hell- I'm so-"

"What are you talking about," Vince asked roughly, sounding confused and wounded for some reason, "Bella wasn't pregnant before-"

She turned around and bolted out of the room, leaving behind the chaos and running up the stairs, guests be damned.

Letting them know had been a horrible idea and Bella knew she was having a full blown panic attack as she burst into her suite's bathroom, hands trembling like crazy and sight blurry with tears. The nausea from before was still present, greater now, and she lurched for the sink as the previous chips and dip all splattered in the bowl, barely making it in time. Some of the vomit splashed on the faucet and the mirror and Bella let out a whimper, hyperventilating.

She stumbled back, away from the mess and sank to her knees in front of the toilet, a much thicker wave of puke splashing in the water and causing her to retch loudly. Bella let out a whimper as her stomach squeezed, a painful cramp causing her to curl up even more.

There was a knock on the closed door, "Bell?" Luke's voice travelled through it, "baby, may I come in?"

Belal groaned and that seemed to be all invitation Lucas needed, because the door opened and he was immediately by her side.

"Oh baby," Lucas whispered, pulling her into a hug, not paying the mess any mind, "shhh, I got you-" he sat on the floor, rocking her, and Bella muffled a burp against his shirt, not realizing she was crying until she pulled back and there was a dark spot on his baby blue shirt.

"I'm sorry, I- I just-"

"No, shhh," Luke cupped her face, "don't apologize, you don't have to, it's okay," he rubbed her back, "are you sick...?"

"I don't know," Bella groaned, leaning over the toilet in order to spit the saliva accumulating in her mouth, "I think the dip..." she never finished her sentence, as just the mere thought of the food caused her belly to squeeze once more and even more vomit fell in the bowl.

Lucas pulled her hair back, reaching to flush when the gagging ceased and then handed Bella a wad of toilet paper, getting up to fill up a glass of water for her and washing off the mess on the sink and mirror, just as there was a knock on the door.

Bella let out a heavy sigh, resting her forehead on the cold porcelain, not at all in the mood to deal with their friends walking on eggshells around her.

"Yes?" Luke opened the door, his body shielding Wendy completely from view, but Bella could see the shorter girl lowering herself so she could get a look at her from under his arm.

Wendy grimaced, opening a sad smile, "just wanted to let you guys know we're leaving," she said in a small voice, "... Vince's really sorry-"

"It's fine," Bella sighed, before Luke could say anything, "not his fault."

Wendy nodded as Luke moved away, arms crossed and an extremely unfriendly expression on. If Bella was feeling forgiving, he clearly wasn't.

"Are you going to be okay?" Wendy answered, diplomatically, and Bella nodded, although even that small movement was enough to make her stomach gurgle and prickles of nausea to go up her spine. She spat in the toilet.

"Okay... Call me if you guys need anything," Wen chewed on her bottom lip, "uhm- Jon and Leo are still here, I- Yeah. Feel better, Bell... Bye Luke..." she sounded so sad, Bella wanted to get up and hug her.

Lucas clearly didn't, because he said a curt "bye, Wendy," and promptly closed the door.

Bella let out a sigh, "Luke..." she moved so she wasn't sitting on the ground, but kneeling, opening and closing her hand in a nervous tick as the nausea built up again. Argument forgotten, Bella stared at the twirling water inside the toilet, breathing out shallowly through her mouth.

He crouched back down, planting the glass of water on the ground and rubbing her back, "I got you, get it up, Bell. You're gonna feel better soon," Luke promised, pulling back her hair gently.

She let out a loud groan, gagging and squeezing her eyes shut, fighting the awful sensation that it wasn't gonna get better soon. Not at all.

TBC

[frownyalfred]

Sending res an ask is like guiltily adding a dirty dish to the sink while someone else is doing the washing up. I adore your work, and hope you are having a wonderful day.

However, this idea has been torturing me and even the slightest chance of queen res reading my ask makes it worth sending. So I present to you, without further ado, my dirty dish.

It's angsty cloisbat sex pollen fuck-or-die.

Clark gets whammied with sex pollen and it takes him OUT, like OUT OUT. He can't fly. He can't talk. He's barely even lucid. It's killing him, literally, and the only way to stop him from dying is to make him come over and over. However, Lois, his wife, isn't here. She's a five hour plane flight away. Three if she takes the private jet Bruce immediately sent for, but it's not enough. She won't get there in time. So, the league choose the next best option to keep Clark alive until Lois arrives. Bruce.

After a half hour scramble to get on the plane, a nerve wracking three hour flight, and a fifteen minute mad dash to make it to where Clark was being housed; Lois walks into the room just as Bruce walks out. Naked as the day he was fucking born, covered in bruises and bite marks and bullet scars and practically dripping with come. Her husband's come.

He doesn't even acknowledge her as he walks with a heavy limp over to a cooler and takes out a bottle of water, chugging it in one go. She can hear Clark whimpering in pain through the soundproofed walls and smell blood, sweat and tears.

She feels lost. And hurt. And angry, irrationally angry. At Bruce. At Clark. Betrayed. Exhausted. Anxious. Worried for herself and everyone involved- and...

Sickeningly, nauseatingly curious.

The same kind of curious that made her fall for an alien from another planet. The same kind of curious that got her stuck in active warzones.

The same kind of curious that was now yelling at her to drag Bruce back into that room and watch her dear sweet harmless Clark fucking ruin him until there was nothing left.

Ooooof. Yeah, I can see this happening, but I would also propose: Bruce stumbling out into the hallway bruised, bleeding, and exhausted and telling her he can't in good conscience ask anyone, much less an untrained civilian, to go in there and endure Clark while he's like this. Bruce is a big guy, he's strong and if Clark isn't using his powers maybe they're on less even footing, but it's still rough.

Bruce isn't jealous, he isn't possessive, he's just thinking of 5'6 Lois who's like 130 lbs soaking wet and can't ask her to do this. Not even ask -- he can't let her do this. She'd be injured and traumatized at best. Bruce can handle this, because he's done it before. Injuries and pain are his job, and he's endured trauma from a loved one before. He can't ask Lois to let her own husband traumatize her.

And then, they negotiate Lois watching while Bruce takes the metaphorical punches for her. If he's going to do this, she's going to watch the whole time. At times, imaginging it was her -- at others, grateful it isn't.

[sleepyjuice-juice]

//TBHK 114 SPOILERS

okay okay imagine

this is kou's perfect tl, right? His family is together, his mom is alive, and not only is Sousuke alive and well, but they are close. First name basis. Sousuke knows that Kou is an exorcist even though he keeps that a secret from his other living friends, Yokoo and Satou. They share some sort of exclusive relationship.

And then... Nene, Akane, possibly Teru (Teru is a wildcard atp - Minamoto mom in the mix complicates his motives), possibly others are trying to revert the timeline, back to the one where absolutely nothing is working out for him. Dysfunctional family, loved ones dying, weight of the world on his shoulders all over again.

I mean, one part of this to analyze is how this affects Kou's character development. In the og tl, he's in a very tough spot in his character development, in which he still feels responsible for everyone else's happiness, always putting others first, always at his own expense. He feels weak and unreliable, but holds himself to such a high standard, because otherwise he doesn't know how to hope. He's barely voiced his insecurities to anyone, besides Mitsuba, and also Teru when they fought during the severance arc.

We don't know how much Kou remembers now, nor the rate he'll remember things, nor how adjusted he really is to this new tl. Because Nene, even though she initially struggled to remember the old tl, she also was foggy on some details about the current tl. And Kou set a table for three instead of 5. So, the question this begs is how displaced is Kou's memory atp?

Alright. Moving on. Depending on these factors... how is his development affected by this? He is in an environment that is fulfilling for him in every way, but it is being threatened to be taken away by people he may or may not remember (doesn't remember Nene yet, status with Akane not confirmed, Teru's motives still in question)

And even if he does remember, how will he react? He has everything he's ever wanted, and it's real this time, unlike in picture perfect. Will he finally put his own wishes first, or will he relinquish a life that's better for him, his family, Sousuke, and so many more? And would that really be selfish of him to decide, if this timeline is objectively healthier?

It's suggested that one of the Yugi twins even grew up to be one of Tsuchigomori's colleagues, likely Amane. If he thought about it, Kou could argue that if Nene loves Hanako/Amane, she would choose the world that he got to grow up in instead of the one where he dies prematurely. It's even hinted that Aoi still likes Akane despite her engagement to Teru, so, logically he'd have a really good argument against everyone opposing the new tl, right?

But... it's not his story. We know he's more than likely going to have to lose this life. Lose his loved ones all over again

And of course... to choose Sousuke Mitsuba, he has to unchoose Mitsuba No. 3. Which is another ooooof biiiig storm coming

It's gonna hurt me, I know. I'm just SO goddamn invested in how this is going to play out

[morallygreychaoticneutral]

The Evolution of Passion: Midnight Kiss.

Hmmm, definitely busting out the "Vampires Kiss" tea for this one. (hibiscus, rose, ginger, cocoa, black tea, rooibos, chai spice and cayenne for bite. It's red, sweet, metallic and oh so good.)

I got an ask (truncated) from danmeiljie " thoughts about what happens in the woods in act 1, and how he initiates with his partner in the graveyard in act 3, But i was curious if you made any connections to his emotional journey and how that's reflected in these different sex scenes and his role in them. Thoughts about vampire physiology and how that might affect his behavior and choices and abilities during sex depending on diet as well."

These are not shallow subjects so be prepared to go deep. You know, Gale bond depth. *snort* I'm going to break these up for length. There is a thing as too much you know.

WARNING: Game Spoilers, Topics of Sex, Abuse, and Adult themes/Language. Not underage appropriate.

This is not fact, just opinion based off my own and game experience. As always, how anybody cannons their relationships or behaviors is perfectly right! No blame, no shame, it's your game.!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Offering a tryst in the woods is a planned move. There is nothing more behind it than getting Tav on his side by using a tactic of seduction to create attachment. He doesn't trust that you won't help him without some sort of incentive. Nobody helps without compensation. Tav is simply a means to an end here. And , in his mind, his only value is found in his body.

And more often than not, at his own expense.

Ooooof. I feel you my moonlit love. I really do.

But it's always worked before, right? Why not now, right?! Get them hooked on his sexual talents (" I'm a consummate lover.") and he will have someone blinded enough to hide his nature and fractured personality behind. This is for survival not pleasure. Emotionally, he is unavailable.

The positions used also reflects this. More so if you let him lay Tav in the grass. If you have the right mods, you will see him offer a kiss and then immediately crawl over to roll Tav onto their side to take them from behind. This position makes sense as it puts him at an advantage. From behind he can control the situation to an extent and it allows him to detach from the situation by avoiding eye contact. Relying on muscle memory to get the job done. Routine.

If you want to get really deep, the position itself could reflect his inner world. Demonstrating how "unseen and unsafe" he feels inside.

But don't fret choice one pickers! It's the same if Tav rides him to the ground. It's a dominating move. He is beneath them. Once again on his back for the thousandth time and in a vulnerable position where in he has been made to suffer countless times.

However, Tav does two surprising things here. They show acceptance of his vampiric nature by offering blood to him. That majorly adds to the experience as a whole I have no doubt. And shows trust in him by allowing him to take it from the same submissive posture he was just in. Tav is now the vulnerable one. Naked and unarmed beneath him by choice.

Forget T & A have you seen clavicles?!

There is absolutely nothing wrong with the first option. It is still a positive experience for him. But I truly feel the second option makes the tingling's of feelings happen sooner for him obvious reasons.

Now, here is how I think his plan and feelings start to unravel that night regardless of what sexual encounter choice was made.

First, given that he is now free and fed better than he has ever been. It is my head cannon that his erections are now stronger and easier to achieve than he is used to. And Tav is the first one he experiences this with.

Wait! I know, but stay with me on this...

How would being starved of the very thing you need to run your entire body not complicate that function. Normal sized cocks need a little over half a cup of blood to fill properly. And that half a cup has to come from somewhere else in the body. If he was only fed a diet of rats a bugs that's only two tablespoons of blood a day if he wasn't refusing it. Less than that if you factor in decay from the rat being dead and putrid. And even less than that being kept in his body if he was being tortured.

And what a perfectly on par thing for Cazadick to do. Demand your slaves go and whore themselves out to bring you back food, but deny them what they would need to NOT have to struggle to do it. What a fucking nightmare! Literally!

So, to combat this Astarion would either know a spell to help him or he has figured out how to re route what blood he had to where he needs it, when he needs it. Sounds uncomfortable and exhausting.

But now, he can feed whenever blood is available. Tav, animals, villains, kobolds, Wyll (wink) . There is now enough blood in his system to not only run all basic vampire functions but also allow for spontaneous arousal.

He's not starving and not struggling to be interested. He's comfortably hard and simi engaged. How novel!

Next, Tav treats him like a seven course meal and not a McNugget. Or rather a McStarion in this case. And yes, his milkshake brought an alarming amount of people to the yard. But that's a different topic.

It would be so easy to just proverbially throw him in your mouth and mindlessly nom nom nom till you are suddenly at the bottom of the box wondering if you ate anything at all.

No. I think Tav took him up on that tasting offer to the fullest existent due to him saying "I'd much rather we got to experience each others FULL portfolio of talents once again." Tav was respectful of his known boundaries and made sure he got as good as he gave. He didn't get hurt. And he more than likely got something out of it he's not used to. Real pleasure. And, if Tav let him bite them, he also got something he has always had to beg for and it cost him nothing. And even if he did think it came with a cost, it was a a fair trade for once.

I feel like this is also supported in the morning when he says ..

"Delicious as you were, I didn't want to go too far."

You could take this as the flirt it sounds like. Or, you can read into the fact that he never actually faces Tav when he says it. To me it's him realizing that this manipulation is going to be much harder then he anticipated. And he is realizing that there is a real possibility to actually go that far. Oh shit...

You are his first blood and first truly pleasurable partner in centuries.

How dare you! He's supposed to be controlling you!

On to the next encounter...eventually. Life has been demanding my attention lately. Rude..

[tonguetyd]

Good morning!!!!! Happy Arcadia day!!! Under the cut is a direct copy of all my notes I jotted as I was doing my first listen (with annotations after the fact). All typos are unedited

EIA

LTW: video game music? DRIFT MENTION! (Oh just wait babygirl) The way he says eclipse is so satisfying. STRINGS!!! Eclipse AND twilight mention? Darya will love this. FIRAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!! Oh the second he whispered we were in for it. FUCK YEAH! God ii is such a good drummer. OH! Trap switch up! Live by the fire and die by the sword nice. GOSPEL. I USED TO KNOW MYSELF. Oh vee…AND THEN ENDING SCREAMS oh his screams are so GNARRRRRLY fuck YEAH

Emergence: she’s still that bitch. I’ve had emergence in my head all day. Vibing. MIIIIIIISSSSSSS GAAAAABBBIIIIIIIIII

Past self: hip shaking so sad ass lyrics! Oh I love it. The falsetto. Oh this. It’s DYWTYLM updated and I love it. He says shit which isn’t as good as a “fuck!” but I love it anyway

Dangerous: god his voice. MORE TRAP BEATS AND WOOS! Chord progression switch nice. OH JE SAID THE THING!!!!

Caramel: slut dropping to the saddest fuckingg song in existence brb

EIA: music box!!! SHEET MUSIC!!!!!! I knew it! Gods sharpening blades lime ooooof yes. Said the thing! This is an analysis lyric song. FILL ORCH OOH!!! Said the other thing!!!! PKAY VICALS!!! That string feature is BEAUTIFUL JAW DROPPED WOE (literally just stared into space looking so dumb but so happy, we LOVE a string feature)

Provider: gospel! The way he’s rhyming these words are hitting. ….ph I’m blushing. I love the sexy songs I’m so ready to read the at first glance loving lyrics and then Realize after. Oof. That’s a GOOOOOD song

Damo: our lil sword guy ❤️ I still hear play discord and games on repeat, boy just wants to play amongus with his boys :::( oh vee count 2 just bc it’s this song also this after provider where he says I wanna be your provider and be this Rick (rock) for you right into nobody knows that I’ve got a problem. The culture of masculinity is rough :/

Geths: immediate thought “have I heard this before??” So that’s weird. oh ves :( WOA!!! This guitar tone hits. Weird Cali vibes. I WAS IN LOVE WITH THE THOUGHT OAUFH. Oh VEE!!!! Whiplashy song but I’m on the ride. A crowd cheering oh that’s us….oh that’s us….maybe it didn’t come with a gun but you deserve one. CALL BACK TO CARAMEL MELODY? A little???

IB: unsettling start ok. Ok piano hello. Car crash imagery, OCEAN IMAGERY. (I GOT THREE LOOKS!!!) ..oh it’s a suicide song. Oh. That. That was not. Mmm. Finally here but I’m not leaving this time. Like. Hopeful suicide??? Idk infinity baths washing over me with the car crash ocean just made me get that impression. But it’s also hopeful. So. Idk. Halfway thru! MORE SCREAAAAMMIIIIING YEAAAAAAAA!! Stank face fr. OOOOOH BREAJDOEN OKAY!!!!! FUCK yeah! Ok admittedly this post breakdown chugging does go on for a little bit but nice. LOVE AN 8 MINUTE SONG THATS 4 MINUTES INSTRUMENTAL!!! Sick af album ending too on a rough metally fade out. And that’s it!!! (Post yaps: what is happening in the bridge that people are yelling about? Teeth of god ohhhh interest-h…HEY….HEY WAIT THAT….THATS ME!!! VESSEL WHAT THE FUCK)

[stephdrawsjohnlock]

SHER – :The Witcher AU: Procreate on iPad Pro

Ooooof okay so I've been working on this one for a LONG time, probably for a year or so; I kept going back to it in between other projects, so long in fact that this pic is the one I discovered a new colouring style that's super subtle but it looks so much better on the skin tones of characters, AND found a new marker brush that works like my traditional media so it looks way more like my original art.

So late 2023 I bought The Witcher 3 Complete Edition when it went on a 20$ sale on the PS Store, on a recommendation for "Best Long RPG Open World Games" video. I've always wanted to try it and OMG, I LOVED IT. I put in over 200 hours into the game and I just got so immersed in it. Never read the books, watched the show, nor ever played the original games before this one, but wow I was SO immersed in this world for nearly 6 months. It was so SO good, I loved it so much. The music is fantastic, the collection grind is PERFECT (I'm one of those weirdo gamers who LOVES the collection grind... probably why I love AC Valhalla so much when everyone else hates it), and the story is incredible. The DLCs were super fun too, I just didn't finish the Blood and Wine one because of that stupid vampire boss fight at the end, I got so frustrated LOL. I finishedthe game, I think, back in late spring of 2024, and honestly it's now one of my fave games. I might even check out the show now, and maybe read the books. The world of the Witcher is SO interesting.

ANYWAY, while I was playing the game I was like "OMG THIS NEEDS A SHERLOCK AU", just like every game I play, hahahah. So in my version, John is a Witcher (probably with a more fanciful name like Johann or something LOL), Sherlock is in the role of Yennifer the Sorceress and maybe Rosie as Ciri? I dunno I just think that the Witcher 3 is a PERFECT Sherlock AU that I needed, like, yesterday LOL. I would write it myself if I knew the lore and world-building of The Witcher much better. It would be SUCH a great adventure story for the Sherlock AU.

I spent far too long on this one, but I actually REALLY love it, which is rare for me. I have also posted the single character pics because I spent AGES on each of them, holy Christmas-Crackers, and I covered most of John and I want y'all to see him!! I LOVE doing LOTS of details on any piece I do, but it's also my weakness in my art because I focus too much on it. But I am SUPER happy with their designs I ended up doing... the pattern on Sherlock's outfit is the wallpaper, hee hee. I dunno why I think I'm so clever for that, bleh.

I hope you guys like this as much as I do, and I hope you all ALSO SEE MY VISION. I need to do way more Sherlock AU pieces. I love doing them so much. I might draw Geralt and Yen in the future the next time I'm on a Witcher kick because their characters are really neat, I like them a lot.

Cheers all :)

🖼 I’M ON INSTAGRAM at stephdrawsfanart 🎨 @stephratte is my Primary Fanart Blog! Art © to S.G.M. Ratté. Do not repost or sell.

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[mangionebabymama]

This is not a prompt but do you think luigi is the type to believe in finding THE ONE for him and wouldn't be able to get over it if it didn't work? Cus i've been feeling with his self proclaimed 'addictive personality' that once he had found the girl he thought understands him perfectly and makes him feel so manly obviously lol, he would be prone to fall into that kind of cult mentality of, no matter how toxic it got, he would be 100% dependent of that relationship.

I don't think he is a big romantic tho, just vulnerable to addictive situations, which of course, love is very addicting

Ooooof this got me thinking

I mean, I don’t really know what his romantic antics or tendencies are like, but you can definitely imagine that with his self-proclaimed addictive personality, if he ever found something (or someone) that completely captivated him, that he was utterly infatuated with, he’d be all in. Like, truly engulfed in it. He probably wouldn’t be able to get enough, and he definitely wouldn’t want to let go. Whether or not he’s a full-on romantic at heart, one thing’s for sure is that he’s passionate about everything he cares about, everything that stirs something in him. And that doesn’t just apply to love—it goes for anything that genuinely intrigues him.

[cinnamonest]

Was thinking if there're any yans that'd want to get married asap, because y'know, when girls use the reason that '19 is too early to get married,' they're just trying to get out of doing any real work or struggle and are looking for an excuse to sleep around (actual comment I read from an irl man, btw) But ooooof, they discover darling is waaaayyyy past her prime atp!! She's practically close to hitting the WallTM . I mean, yes they still think about her and yes they'd still pay her to fuck them, and yes, it's very unfortunate she's let so many men run her over and hasn't done achieved anything meaningful in her life, line getting married and serving her husband and enduring the marriage if things get "rough", but that's exactly why he's as generous and kind as he is!!!

ASFjdsKfjwa;fdashfhD ANON I never thought I’d read the phrase “the wall” outside of angry middle aged men on twitter the way I did a double take 😭😭

This specifically has like Ayato/Diluc vibes to me, I feel like even in a modern setting they’re still coming from wealth/nobility and you know how the elite class loves their young marriages, so it’s just what both are conditioned to as being normal.

But you’re so right and I love the thought of some delusional guy with a crippling savior complex lusting after some woman, convincing himself she should be grateful he wants her so bad and that she has some degree of due blame and shame for a perceived fault.

After all, you’re like, what, over 20? Basically a hopeless spinster. Probably desperate to get married, got baby rabies, all that stuff, not to mention probably insecure and jaded and calloused — all things that should be bad, but for him, it sparks these sorts of intricate fantasies and urges.

To correct you. To save you. You poor, misguided thing. Maybe you were too focused on pointless things like a career, not knowing that such a thing is worthless for you.

Or maybe you were just too shy. Or too picky. Whatever is wrong with you or however you screwed up, it’s okay, you can be forgiven for your wrongs. Sure, you’re resistant at first, in the same way a stray cat picked up off the street might initially hiss and scratch, a defense mechanism out of fear, nothing more. But with enough persistent affection — healthily balanced out with a firm hand where needed — you’ll come around in no time, and he knows you'll very happily and naturally fall right into the role he wants from you.

[writerblue275]

A (Supposedly) Secret Relationship with Runeterra!Kayn

Inspiration: Ooooof base Kayn has me a little fucked up rn. I think I might want to do some stories in the future so I want to set up some background info through a headcanon, similar to what I did with the FWB!Ez AU.

Champion: Kayn (like base lore Kayn)

Genre: Headcanons

Category: Fluff!

Gender: Gender Neutral Reader

TW: Discussion of sparring. Brief mention of fainting. Rule breaking (nothing super bad just general young adult rebelliousness). Swearing.

Note: Hehe I had fun with this one. I got to explore some LOR lore, which I hadn’t gotten into before. I am taking some liberties with it, however, like Priestess Ysdra not being the one to have the visions of the Darkin weapons. I’ll use “Yanléi,” “Order of Shadows,” and “Shadow Order” interchangeably. They refer to the same organization. ALSO. Like let’s be so for real the Order of Shadows isn’t exactly…good. They are not the heroes.

Everyone in the Shadow Order knows who Shieda Kayn is. How could they not? Master Zed’s protégé, the next in line to lead the Order, the infamous “Shadow Reaper,” his accolades in relation to the Yanléi go on and on. There’s always so much attention on him.

Which makes it even funnier that nearly the entire order hasn’t figured out its rising star is in a secret relationship with a different one of its members and has been for like two years now.

That member being you.

Then again you’re not a member who is typically in the constant spotlight of the order. Quite the opposite, in fact.

You are another acolyte, like Kayn, and the apprentice of Mistress Shi, the Shadowseer of the Yanléi. Unlike most of the Order of Shadows, who use their shadow magic to assist in combat, you and her primarily use your abilities for experiencing and understanding prophetic visions related to the Order.

So not only do your day-to-day tasks keep you away from most members of the order, but you’re also supposed to keep quiet unless discussing things with Mistress Shi, Master Zed, and, as of about a year ago (when Zed officially decided who would be the next master of the Yanléi), Kayn. (Though you’d been talking to him quite a bit before this point but we’ll get into that in a second.)

But going back a bit, your first introduction to the famed shadow reaper was quite an interesting one.

Despite your primary tasks within the order, you still are trained to fight, and you fight extremely well. After all, Master Zed believes very member of the Order must be able to defend themselves.

So one afternoon, not too long after you joined the order, Kayn was looking for a sparring partner. A tall task as not many people want to go up against him, even just sparring.

So Zed, who noticed him, motioned you over to where Kayn is, introducing you and suggesting he spar with you.

Kayn had already snap judged your abilities once he heard your future role in the order, and he was not-so-subtly complaining to Zed about pairing him with you. (A/N: Now listen I love Kayn but he can be quite arrogant.)

His complaints were quickly cut short though as you reached over, yanked him closer, then flipped him over your shoulder and slammed him onto the floor of the training room, looking at him with a raised eyebrow as if to say, “You were saying, asshole?”

Zed just watched this go down with a chuckle.

(Needless to say much later on in your relationship Kayn would realize that moment was the moment he fell head over heels for you [pun fully intended].)

You quickly became his favorite sparring partner. Despite your focus on training your shadow magic to see visions, you had an excellent mastery of many different types of weapons and fighting styles and you never took it easy on him.

But you were always so….quiet. You never even had reactions of pain when he managed to land a hit on you while sparring.

Because of this, it didn’t take long for Kayn’s curiosity in you to grow.

So he tried to get you to talk to him. He just couldn’t help it. As he got to know you he desperately wanted to hear what your voice sounded like, building all sorts of scenarios in his brain. But you’d only respond with non-verbal communication, or you’d write down notes and give them to him.

Eventually, through sparring and being a menace (affectionate), Kayn managed to wear your resolve down enough to where you pulled him to an empty room in the temple and murmured a soft threat to him about shoving his training sword down his throat if he didn’t stop trying to get you to talk

But like…honestly the way his face lit up and the soft hint of earnest excitement in his voice as he smirked and whispered, “So that’s what you sound like…now I finally know….”

(He activated his trap card and you walked right into it.)

That crumbled your resolve completely. And you began talking to him regularly, though you had to find excuses to get you two in a position where no one would suspect you were talking. (You two were suddenly able to land quite a few more hits on each other in training. And you both suddenly seemed to get a few more minor injuries that the other would have to take a closer look at, you know, since he/you caused them. It was only right.)

You two were quite proud of yourselves, thinking you were able to get away with it all.

(Btw Zed and Mistress Shi absolutely knew what was happening. They just didn’t stop it because tbh they were extremely curious where this thing between the two of you would go. And besides, your future roles within the order would lead to you two talking anyway so whatever.)

This “thing” slowly turned into something more as you eventually opened up to each other and got to know each other beyond sparring partners.

You became friends, and then eventually, even more.

(Oh and your first kiss with Kayn came when you were hovering over him after flipping him over your shoulder. He reached up, gently pulled you down, and just kissed you. And he was thrilled when you kissed him back. One of the very few moments in Shieda Kayn’s life where he’s ever been….giddy.)

So how is it having the shadow reaper as your partner? Well…

You bring out the soft side in him, and to be honest, that really freaked him out at first.

He’s had to be a tough guy all his life, so to feel soft affection for someone was a whole new experience for him. But eventually he realized it was a good thing, having someone who loved him for himself, having someone to be vulnerable with, having someone he can laugh or cry freely around.

Kayn is surprisingly clingy. Which makes keeping things “secret” a bit difficult at times. (You’re definitely trying harder than he is.)

You’ve had to hiss at him to stop giving you bedroom eyes in public while you patch him up from sparring. Or gently swat his hand away when he instinctively tries to take yours when you’re walking together in the temple during the day.

Occasionally you and Kayn travel together outside the temple to enjoy the nature surrounding it (under the guise of “using the nature of Ionia to better connect with the shadow visions.” And “If (Y/N) is going to do that, then it’s only right for me to go with. I can defend them the best from an ambush”).

Mhmmm yup totally not an excuse to go find more time during the day to cuddle under a tree, be very openly affectionate, and talk normally to each other. Nope totally not that at all, why would you even think such a preposterous thing? 😉

Kayn is protective of you. Spirit of Ionia help any acolyte who accidentally hurts you while sparring. You’ve had to talk him down from the warpath a couple times. (“Kayn, it was just an accident. You’ve landed far worse hits on me when we spar and I’ve been fine.” Or “There’s no need to threaten him, baby…besides, he looked worse by the time I was done with him!”)

He denies it when you try and tease him, but you swear you see him pout when he has to spar with a different person because you’re already paired up with someone.

Not that he has anything to worry about, and he knows that. He just doesn’t think any of the other acolytes are worth your skills. You’re way too talented to fight them.

He’s very serious about protecting you during a vision, too. During your visions, you essentially lose consciousness. The first time you had a vision around Kayn, you two were sparring when suddenly you just collapsed (thankfully against him so he could catch you). Seeing you unconscious with the black tattoos on your arms writhing like snakes, giving off black, shadowy smoke admittedly rattled him pretty severely.

(And that vision? Well that vision was of the Darkin weapons. Including the location in Noxus of the Darkin scythe containing Rhaast.)

That incident was one of the first full visions you had. So you weren’t sure what to expect at the time, but since then you’ve learned the signs of an oncoming vision, as well as how to better control them. As soon as you tell Kayn it feels like one is coming, he takes you somewhere safe and is basically your loyal guard dog.

And once you come to he’s always waiting with water and a little snack for you. (How sweet.)

Lots of small stolen moments and stolen kisses throughout the day. (This man loves to kiss you oh my goodness. He wants to kiss you as much as physically possible.)

At night, when Kayn is not on a mission, you’ll be getting ready for bed and he’ll just come through the wall of your room using his shadow magic and happily spend the night chatting and such with you. (He’s primarily the small spoon btw, though if you need him to be the big spoon now and then, just ask.)

Will not leave your room the next morning until you give him a “have a good day” kiss. He claims it has become his good luck charm for the day.

He’s so dramatic about it too lol. Kayn will wait for his kiss by the door, and once you come over and he kisses you breathless, he just chuckles and slips away in a cloud of shadowy smoke, going through the closed door to go back to his room. (He is a TEASE omg.)

One of the surprisingly sweet things Kayn does is bring you a flower/flowers whenever he can, especially when he’s coming home from a mission. He loves how flowers make you smile.

Oh and Kayn LOVES when you play with his hair. When he’s had a really tough day, he’ll bring his hair brush along with him when he comes to your room, just quietly holding it out to you. As soon as you take it and sit him down on your bed so you can work behind him, he already starts to visibly relax.

(A/N: LONG HAIR KAYN LET��S GOOOOO.)

He’s actually not afraid to say he loves you. It took him a while to first say it, but once Kayn saw how happy you were to hear him say it, he gladly started saying it as much as he wanted to. (Please tell him you love him back though or he will pout.)

Kayn is also your number one cheerleader, always telling you he’s proud of you and even thanking you for what you do to help the Order.

And because he believes in you, he’ll push you to be better (in a good way). This is especially true when it comes to fighting, which is his specialty.

But regardless, you get to go through your days knowing you have the full love and support of the next Yanléi master behind you. (Not to mention you physically have him next to you as you fall asleep at night.) Aren’t you lucky!

Thank you for reading everyone! I hope you enjoyed! A little different, but listen, I felt inspired hehe. 💙

[pompillar]

Heeeeeeeeelp!!! Episode 16 is djbshjskf sbhsjcncnjd

Hyyyyyyde... I need you to back up my guy don't get so close. And again, gimme Hodge and Podge. I love them so dearly. They deserve all the love and as many breaks as they want.

Goodbye theory of Dionysia being occult and booze filled. Hello circus nightmare. Getting the vibe that Elias might have been the captain when Haru was first there. Which wouldn't make sense unless he's a ghoul but I digress. Maybe just a gen ed third year. Idk man something about him makes me not trust him.

Haru... I need you to be so for real right now. Why and when did you transfer it's for my chart! He's lucky he's a ghoul cause otherwise he'd have so many ulcers from stress.

Lycaaaaaaaa, hi Lyca! Such a helpful boy. Love him getting into it with that shitty little fox.

Ooooof okay a piece of the Winchester mansion. Yeah that's an anomaly by itself. Also the two factions thing got better explained. I wonder why they have it split though. I hate that bus omg please it's the awful. Now imagining Ritsu being a pinball in that bus, I love everyone's reaction to it.

Everyone is on about Taiga and Ritsu's outfits but not Romeo? I'm sorry his is the best to me, the ends of his sleeves are translucent, the color scheme is gorgeous, and he's not one of the new cards??? Rude.

Taiga can we not flex the lunatic muscles today? And running straight for beer and mahjong... this man is a disaster. Unfortunately he's attractive.

The two rooms thing... Help. Nobody sleeping. Romeo has the best line for you choosing him tho.

I'm sorry I full on laughed when that soccer ball hit him in the face, and again he says how much I paid for this face. Bruh I really think he had work done on his face. Oh no, he looks miserable when he falls into the sewer. I thought he was gonna cry... I wish he had actually... no I won't elaborate

They mentioned going back too many times to be able to. I saw that one coming. Romeo's gun! He came close to crying again I'm sure.

So how did Haru's call get through? We can't get calls out and aren't receiving any. Even if it cut off it's still odd that he managed to in the first place.

I'm going to scream if Taiga doesn't stop acting like a certain green haired alien from an old beloved magical girl series. "Kitty cat" "stay here with me" "I see that dirty mind" The audacity to do that to me.

He's really gotta stop the whole cryptic timeline jumping thing too. I need you to explain asshole! Gimme your fucking hand! We gonna try this shit today!

The building... Aight Ritsu you get your shot. Also the car thing, his body becoming not only sturdier but heavier and slower makes sense. I like that detail.

Hyde... Hyde I'm going to go to the chancellor about this. I'm going full on Karen to him about this whole thing. Fucking pack your bags sir. There's a reason your little brother hates you. A fake warding card that's supposed to save you from death. He knew it would be the hundun. He really is setting Romeo up. Ugh professor student relations never end well...

Taiga is actually the hero in this one, and also the boyfriend that goes 'im sorry baby, want me to kill him for you?' on brand for him tbh

Eliassssssss!!! You are so pretty and welcoming but I can't trust your ass. Please don't fuck us over later.

(I'm so happy they're being nicer to mc now. I know why but it's also a bit of them accepting her as part of their lives now. Meaning they need to pedal to the medal on this curse. Which I am starting to not believe is going to kill us.)

Okay final note... WHERE IS MY CONCLUSION FROM THE CLIFF HANGER OF LAST EPISODE OF SUBARU UNDER THE TREE OF SEVERANCE HELLO??????!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[dangermousie]

Episode 30 made me lose my entire mind.

I love that Muqing is no fool and figured it all out and laid out to her why he got to that conclusion.

And she is all "are you gonna arrest me?" and I swear it's flirting and then he asks her "do you think I will hand over the treasure to you?" and she asks "won't you?" and I can't already but then, they way he doesn't answer at first, seemingly, and yet HE DOES! Because he reminds her of when she asks him if he likes calling her princess and what that dynasty ever did for him.

I started screaming. Literally. As he lays it all out and I love that he gets that he's had no choice about the time he was born in, only what to do with it.

The fact that he got on board reform wagon back then in large part because of love for her aaaaaaa!

Very modest goals.

Ooooof!

The fact that he started in the reform in large part because of love back then and the fact that he refrained from doing so now also because of love - because revolution would overturn her world and destroy it. LIKE - I CANNOT WITH THAT MAN!

And then the way he logically lays out how he started realizing she might not mind her world destroyed - because he father married her off for political reasons and how he figured out she never liked her husband and how he figured out she's reform minded and then later she might be a reformist in general.

And now he knows she is, he can proceed because he'd never put a cause above her and AAAAAAAAA and honestly, this is so well done because it shows him slowly thinking things through in general in the drama - how he decides past plan of reforms wouldn't work and more radical republican ones are needed and how even with that he'd refrain from ANY reform participation unless it won't destroy her world and aaaaaaa GOD I LOVE HIM.

The way they clasp hands and you see their matching bracelets. No sex scene in Brigerton made me feel as insane as these two barely holding hands and his touching her face. I was literally high pitched screaming.

[asurrogateblog]

I remember there was a pretty interesting and amusing poll over here where people were asked whether John fumbled Paul or Paul fumbled John, that I can no longer find (tho tbf I wasn't looking that hard for it) BUT

What are your own thoughts on the issue???

ooooof okay. well, obviously the real answer is that they fumbled each other. clearly there was some sort of major failure of communication on both ends. but to be more detailed about that I think maybe from the perspective of the 60's, paul fumbled john, but from the perspective of the 70's, john fumbled paul.

what I mean by that is, from what I can glean from...lyrical patterns of late beatles paul songs, it sounds like paul is the one that got broken up with. there's a lot of "please take me back" energy that makes it feel like paul did something to lose him (even if paul doesn't think it was deserved or genuinely doesn't know what it was he did). after the band breakup, john also seemed pretty resentful in a way that makes paul look like the bad guy.

but, as we move into the mid 70's, we can hear that john is a lot more self-reflective and apologetic – recognizing that he wasn't exactly on his best behavior, and taking responsibility for negatively interpreting things paul said and did in a way that harmed their relationship unnecessarily.

I imagine that if we could magically know exactly what happened objectively, the guilt would probably more or less even out. they're both nightmares in their own special ways <3

so. john fumbled the ball, but paul didn't catch it either. and I guess to finish the metaphor, by the time he picked it back up the game was almost over.

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #344

Ooooof. Sephiroth. It has been a very long day. It has been a very good day!! But still, it is long. I'm gonna do my best to write today's letter, but admittedly, I'm already struggling to keep my eyes open.

Well. Let's start at the beginning. I went to work for 5 hours, and it was good!! I was kept very busy doing all sorts of things, like helping customers, putting cookies on trays, putting pies into containers, putting labels on containers, putting things out on display, and so many more things. I was so busy today that I definitely did not have any time to snag any pictures for you (which was really sad!), but!!! J came over to visit and to get some bread, and he got a couple pictures of what I do that maybe you'll like!

Here's one of the best examples I've seen in a long time of the fact that I tend to unsettle people by holding my body weirdly:

I definitely look like some kind of weird goblin in this one, haha! Man, being dyspraxic and awkward sure is wild, hahaha!

Oh! And in case you wondered – those cookies on those racks in the background were arranged by me! All in all, I prepared 29 trays of cookies today! I was supposed to prepare 31, but I ran out of sugar cookies and had to make two less than what was called for. Oh well.

Interestingly enough, the manager of the whole store was, once again, helping out in my department, since Thanksgiving demands just... so much bread, oh my goodness! And he saw J taking pictures of me, but he didn't know that J was my husband! So I guess he thought that J was being a creep towards me, and his protective instincts kicked in, and I guess he was maybe two seconds away from demanding that J leave the store, or else decking him directly in his face, until Tr, one of my bosses, reassured him that J was my husband!

...The notion that the store manager cared enough to want to protect me was... really nice, actually. And J was grateful for his sentiments, too. I really do work with some very amazing and caring people. I feel astoundingly lucky!

Also... I'm pleased to tell you that all those who ate the brownies I made came up to me to tell me how amazing they were! They were the pumpkin brownies that I made with you in mind, and so... their reactions make me wish even more that I could just pop over to where you are and give you a container full of them, haha...

...Goodness, but you have no idea what I'd give up just to be able to do that... You have no idea...

When I got home, I had every intention to eat, and then either do some leisure writing or take a nap. But a lot of the folks from the friend-making app wanted to talk to me (this will never not be weird!), and... I ended up prioritizing them instead of myself.

...Sigh... my bad. I am genuinely interested in speaking to them, which definitely does not help me to prioritize myself. Sheesh.

Still, I made a tea! I even took a video of it! The captions aren't ready yet because I didn't have time to do them, but... you can see it here. Though I'll warn you, this might not be my best handiwork...

J had an outing planned with one of the folks from that “Speed Friending” event, too. So we went and did that, and it was good! The place was about an hour's drive from our house. It had an amazing menu! Here were some of the things:

I was very hungry and my body was somewhat sore from being physically active for much of the day, so I got the lobster bites and the ribeye! If you've been reading my letters up until this point, then I'm sure you already know that I asked them to only just barely cook the ribeye, hahaha! I got some yummy pictures...

...And yes, they absolutely did oblige my request to leave it mostly raw:

...This was one of the most beautiful steaks I've ever had the pleasure of eating. It was perfect.

Are you ready for this? Because I was amazed by this. And it was wholly unexpected:

...The spinach tasted even better than the steak. And I have no idea how that can be. It was buttery and garlicky and just a little bit salty, and... oh my goodness. I want more of it, and I'm very sad that this place is an hour away, hahaha!

The person we were with was very jolly and is amazing at keeping a conversation going! I had a lot of fun listening to him and J talk about various things! I liked that he didn't seem to mind that I was more inclined towards listening than speaking. And I really liked that when I did speak, he listened and responded with experiences of his own to show that he understands what it was that I said.

We will get together sometime soon – hopefully at Eggcellent! I am eager!

...Sephiroth. I wish you could have some of these aspects of my life. I wish that for all the best parts of it, I could just plop you where I am so you can have it. I absolutely would not mind trading places with you for just long enough to let you experience the good and delightful things.

…

...Sephiroth.... I'm falling asleep. I want to write more to you. I want to speak more gentle and loving things at you. I want to show you more of what it is to have a relatively normal life, and I want to prove to you that it's something you can achieve. Because you can. You totally can. And... you could probably pull it off even better than I can.

...But. If I keep writing, I'm going to ramble, because I'm having trouble just with making sure my train of thought doesn't run away. So I guess I'm gonna go to bed now.

Hey. I love you a whole lot. And... I hope you're keeping yourself safe over at where you are. Please... please don't do things that will lead to you disappearing, okay? Please rise up into truly living. We miss you.

I'll write again tomorrow.

Your friend, Lumine

[delta-lethonomia]

H, P, R from the fanfic author ask meme!

H: How would you describe your writing style?

Hm… I like to think it's like if the Twin Peaks prequel movie Fire Walk With Me was a vibe, lol.

I hope for poignant and gripping, like watching an tragic accident as it unfolds that everyone knew was going to happen, the signs were all there, but it couldn't be stopped. I do realize it gets a bit dramatic though 😅 but I think the narrative is so colored by Tav's perspective it feels like being in her head, and I really like that, and that's what I want it to feel like. Personal but dissociative, everything is seen through a warped hue, and because it's so "in her head" it can be less precise and more intuitive, even if it's confusing sometimes. Taking the fun bits of purple prose and writhing in it.

P:  Where did you find the most inspiration for your story < insert title >?

So I assume you mean For All The Wrong Reasons because that's the big one lol. Tbh, because I developed Tav around Astarion, his influence and his story cannot be overstated, and there's a lot of personal character traits in her and me that I wanted to play with. Honestly I'm not really aware of the type of lowgrade toxic-yet-loving femdom in other media, so it's more that I wanted to write something that filled a hole I've been thinking about for a while. There are a lot of nice, endlessly giving Tavs in bg3 fic (or at least there were early on back when I was reading it), so I wanted to write something very different specifically to contrast. I will say though, I spent far too much time in the Naruto fandom as a kid and I think my obsession with Uchiha Madara rewired my brain chemistry. There's a lot of things with him and Obito that still make my brain go 'ping!', so those character stories/vibes still have a lot of influence I think.

Other than that it's mostly music. I wrote the majority of the earlier chapters and plot listening to Electric Callboy, specifically the songs "Parasite", "Hate/Love", "Fuckboi", and "Crystals." Other influential songs were "Crystaleyes" by AViVA, and some older songs by Florence + the Machine, such as "Kiss With A Fist," "Drumming Song", "Heavy In Your Arms", and "Hardest of Hearts."

Stinging Nettle Wine came about because I'm a sad tormented bisexual who's deep in the female side of the bi-cycle right now while married monogamously to a man, and I have a lot of thoughts about toxic sibling dynamics.

R: Which writers (fanfic or otherwise) do you consider the biggest influence on you and your writing?

Ooooof. The Carnivorous Muffin and Vinelle, for their Twilight and Harry Potter fics, taking characters down plotlines that make perfect sense character-wise but are so utterly wild you'd never expect them. (It's like the movie The Substance - utterly insane in the best way, but positive, y'know? Like I understand how we got here, but the ride was something else.)

Anything by astolat, specifically her Game of Thrones fics, just because I can point to them and say, "Look, fanfic is real literature. This is phenomenal. You can be a real author and still write fanfic."

Diablerie by Oceanbreeze7, a Tom Riddle (HP) fanfic that haunts me to this day, and whose visuals and philosophical content matter made my brain very happy. Anything by Metalomagnetic (HP). Anything by Tozette (HP & Naruto), though Dirt & Ashes holds a special place in my heart. The Last Ones Standing by olliya (Naruto, for having a post-apocalypse and sticking to it.) Five Kingdoms for the Dead by Evil Is A Relative Term, another Naruto fic that had some influence over baby me for sure.

I feel like there's two distinct bins here, the fics I like for their tight plot and commitment to character development and agency, and the fics I like for the visuals and philosophy, how dark they are while not being torture porn 😅 When it comes to writing style though, I know I have liked fics with the sort of disjointed quality I tend to write in, but I can't think of them at the moment. I've only recently started bookmarking things on ao3 so there's a lot of stuff that's just lost to time and memory, even though I've been reading fanfic since 2005 or so.

[kuschelkissen]

Finished the last 6 episodes of live action link click in one go and ooooof... what a ride 😭😭😭 that last episode was the most stressed I've been in a while... spoilers under cut

Like. Wow.

I mean, we called the Vespa thing already in that dive, and when Lu Guang got that email from Qiao Ling... yeah well, it all clicked 🥲

(Plus, you could already see it when Vespa followed her)

And then... oh god, when they had to decide what to do and Cheng Xiaoshi decided to go for the big picture, even though Qiao Ling was at risk 😭 but man. "I'll save the world, you'll save my sister."

AND THEN THE ASSHOLE WASN'T THERE!! I swear, I already saw him pushing her down in that moment, with Cheng Xiaoshi still in the past and Lu Guang too far away to do anything...

God, I swear, the STRESS I felt when Cheng Xiaoshi sat in that car?? I thought "oh god will he die now?!" OTL

In hindsight, that wouldn't have made sense, but dear God was I worried.

And then they found Qiao Ling and Vespa and there was still half an hour of episode left, and I KNEW that Lu Guang would have his signature white hair in the end, so my mind went into full on drama mode, wondering what would happen, would it actually turn white from him changing the past? Would he go back to save Qiao Ling? Or would something happen to Cheng Xiaoshi??

In my head there were 4 scenarios...

1) Qiao Ling being pushed

2) Cheng Xiaoshi switching the hostage place with her (and then being pushed)

3) Cheng Xiaoshi being pushed when Vespa grabbed him to beg for help

4) Vespa jumping in the end, and Cheng Xiaoshi trying to save him and then falling with him

More actual spoilers

In the end, none of that happened. But dear God, I was YELLING at the boys to grab Qiao Ling and get her away when Vespa came to Cheng Xiaoshi and then Lu Guang. Like. HE'S OUT OF THE WAY, GO AND SAVE HER?? OTL

And then there was still so much time left when it was finally over, and they were standing at the street, and I thought WILL HE ACTUALLY BE RUN OVER NOW OR WHAT?! Because he was the only one standing this close to the street and that one truck rushed by REALLY quickly. 🫠

I was STRESSED, okay??

But no. Nothing happened.

AND HIS HAIR?? IS JUST??? WHITE????

He DYED it black the whole time, so Cheng Xiaoshi wouldn't think he was a weirdo???

(OK, it's actually kinda adorable, but... lol 😆)

I love how he looks with that wig, btw... it changes his look so much?? Idek??

Also, that whole "this isn't the first time we met", what the fuck, that was mean 😂

[transboyswitchytales]

OH MY GOD-

you sure outdid yourself i don't even know what to say right now. Danger in New Horizons left me feral for more (picture me begging on my knees right now). Your depictions of Agatha are always so dynamic and earnest, but this one is almost my favorite (none of them can top Small Creature's Agatha).

Well, I hope your pillow is cold on both sides and all that, thanks for sharing your work Xx

(oh also i don't know what type of music you r into but I was listening to gigi perez's new allbum and At the Beach, in Every Life is so Small Creature coded, or maybe the brainrot is taking over my life...

Oh damn, thank you! Fuck! that is sweet as hell my friend!

I'm listening to gigi perez's At the Beach, In Every Life right now, for the first time, because of you my love!

My rough draft for A minute from Home next chapter has Gigi's 'Kill for you' and that song is so Agatha in A minute from home for me. That neediness that is so deep inside of her.

But baby witch this song is so good I wanted a cigarette (Dont' smoke it's bad, I stopped I swear) It's like smoke after sex good.

Next chapter of Small Creatures It will 10000% be on. It works for the chapter and everything, very

I love adding songs to these posts, and I frequently think no one is listening to any of these song recs. Are you guys??

Baby, my sweet anon, I love your song rec, full credit, It's going in!

'If you speak, then I would move Then I would run right where you are

Then I ripped on through your blouse As it ripped right through my house I never knew, I never knew you had such a filthy mouth'

ooooof that's good dude!

Anon(or person scrolling here) if you haven't heard 'Kill for you' it is good ouchie scream and cry in the shower feels - I listen to it when I write A Minute From Home But So Far From It on repeat sometimes.